Joel Osteen Podcast - Don't Live For Approval | Joel Osteen

Episode Date: January 2, 2025

If you want to reach your destiny, you can't live for the approval of others. Because we have God's approval, we can live from a place of confidence. Your best days are still ahead, and together we can make a difference in this world with the message of God's hope and love. To give visitJoelOsteen.com/GiveHope.Start every day with faith to move mountains and peace that surpasses all understanding. Our 2025 Today's Word Daily Devotional includes 365 days of Scripture, inspiration, and prayers. Let this January offer encourage you all year long, https://bit.ly/3ZWYzX5.   Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of the Joel Osteen Podcast ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hi, this is Joel and Victoria. Thanks so much for listening to the podcast and thanks for supporting the ministry. We believe you're going to have an awesome 2024, healthy, productive, and favor-filled. God bless you today and enjoy the message. Well, God bless you. It's always a joy to come into your homes. We love you and we know God has great things in store. If you're ever in our area, I hope you'll stop by and be a part of one of our services. I promise you, we'll make you feel right at home. so much for coming out today. I like to start with something funny each week, and you know, these are not all doctrinally correct, especially today, but I heard about this middle-aged woman. She had a heart attack, and on the operating table, she asked God if this was it.

God said, no, you have 40 more years. Upon recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital, have a major facelift, a tummy tuck, liposuction, an extreme makeover. Two months later, as she was leaving the hospital, she got hit by a car and killed. She got to heaven and said, God, I thought you said, I had 40 more years. God said, I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you. All right. Hold up your Bible. Say it like you mean it. This is my Bible. I am what it says I am. I have what it says I have. I can do what it says I can do. Today, I will be taught the Word of God. I boldly confess, my mind is alert, my heart is receptive, I will never be the same. In Jesus' name, God bless you.

I want to talk to you today about not living for approval. Too many people get their worth and value out of what other people think. Do they like me? Do they approve me? Do they think that I'm important? And because of their insecurity, they're constantly playing up to people. trying to win their favor, trying to meet every expectation. When we do this, we end up being controlled and manipulated.

We let people put us into a box and make us into something that we're not. I know people today, they're not following their dreams because they're so concerned that if they don't meet the demands of all their family and friends, they may fall out of their good grace, they may lose their approval. But listen, if their approval is only based on you meeting all their demands and you keeping them happy, they're not true friends, they're manipulators, they're controllers. There's a real freedom when you realize you don't need other people's approval. You have Almighty God's approval.

Don't spend your life trying to keep everyone around you happy. Some people don't even want to be happy. You've got to be secure enough to say, I love you, but I'm not going to let you control me. You may not give me your blessing, but that's okay. I have God's blessing, and I'm not going to be a people pleaser. I'm going to be a God pleaser. Well, you say, Joel, if I do this, they may not be happy. Well, maybe it's time for them to not be happy instead of you not being happy.

You've got to take charge of your own life. If you're being manipulated and letting somebody pressure you into being something that you're not, it's not the other person's fault. It's your own fault. You control your destiny. And you can be nice. You can be respectful, but you have to put your foot down. Quit allowing people to make you feel guilty because you don't meet all their demands.

Quit letting someone run your life because if you don't, they're not going to give you their approval. Friends, life is too short. to try to keep everyone happy. You have to accept the fact that you cannot please every person. Everyone is not going to give you their approval. If you're going to fulfill your destiny, you have to stay true to your own heart and not let the pressures of those around you squeeze you into their mold. When my father went to be with the Lord and I stepped up to pastor the church, there was an older gentleman that I'd known my whole life and he got me aside, and said, Joel, if this is going to work, here's what you're going to have to do.

He told me how to run the church, how to minister, and how to lead the staff, how to move forward. And I listened to his advice. I was very open, but nothing he was saying to me agreed with what was on the inside. I prayed, I searched my own heart, but nothing bore witness. And I had to risk falling out of his good grace to follow my own heart. It was a difficult decision, but I knew it was better to have God's approval than to have men's approval. I stepped out and followed my heart, and God blessed it. It took off. But what's interesting is I did fall out of his good grace. He wasn't happy that I didn't

take his advice. And people like that, people that get upset unless you do it their way, they are not really for you. They don't have your best interest at heart. Because if they were for you, they would be mature enough to say, even if you don't do it my way, even if you don't take my suggestions, I'll support you. I'll be behind you because I'm your friend and I want to see you succeed. That's a true friend. When you're honest with people and you share what's in your heart, a true friend, even if they don't agree, will be mature enough to say, you know what, you can hear from God. You have the Holy Spirit on the inside.

I'll be behind you. But if they just try to make you feel bad, like you have to take their advice, like you're making a big mistake, that's somebody that's more interested in controlling you than in helping you fulfill your God-given destiny. When I didn't take this man's advice, he was no longer on my side.

It wasn't something big and obvious, just subtle things. I'd walk into a room and I could feel his sense of disapproval. But thank God, understand what I'm telling you. I knew I didn't have to have his approval. He wasn't God. He wasn't sitting on the throne. He didn't write the plan for my life. I dug my heels in and said, God, he may not be for me, but I know you're for me. God, I may not have his approval, but I know I have your approval. That's all that really matters. I just kept pressing forward doing what God put in my heart. God not only brought us through that transition, but he brought us out bigger and better and

greater than we ever had it before. God knows what he's doing. But I found some people, no matter what you do, they are not going to be for you. Don't spend your life trying to win the approval from someone that's never going to give you their approval. It may be a supervisor at the office. You can do your job plus three others, and they're still going to look down on you. don't worry about it. You don't need their approval. God will fight your battles. God will get you to where you're supposed to be. Maybe you have a relative that compliments everyone except you in the family. You could win the Super Bowl and they'll ignore you and brag on everybody else. Don't let them steal your joy. You don't need their approval. They can't keep you from rising higher. If you'll keep being your best,

spending your energy toward your God-given dreams and not toward trying to get them to approve you and to think that you're good enough and you're talented and you're important. No, be secure in who God made you to be. Before you were born, God stamped his approval on you. I see too many people, they're playing up to other people. They're trying to win their favor and trying to impress them.

They're basically trying to buy their friendship and buy their approval. The problem with that is if you start a friendship off like that, that's the only way you'll be able to keep it going. If you let them control you and just you have to meet all their demands, then one day when you wise up and think I'm tired of being manipulated, it's not worth all the effort and energy, they'll simply just cut you loose. You won't have their approval after all. It's much better to trust God to bring us divine connections. that man that got upset because I didn't take his advice, he thought he knew what I was supposed to do more than I did. But God will always give you direction for your life more than anybody else.

Other people may have suggestions, they may have ideas, but bottom line is God speaks directly to you. The Holy Spirit lives on the inside of you. He leads you. He guides you. Yes, it's good to be open and listen to parents and mentors and friends, but you've got to follow your own heart. There is a still small voice, a knowing right down in here that's God talking to you. Now, be careful about people that always have a word from the Lord for you. I grew up in church. I've heard a lot of words from the Lord. Some of them write on, some of them weigh off.

but anytime someone gives you a quote word from the Lord, that should simply confirm what you already know on the inside. When that man told me how to run the church, it didn't agree with anything that I was feeling. It was totally foreign. I've learned God will not tell you something about my life and not tell me. God and I are on speaking terms. We talk every single day. Some people will use the scripture. spiritual things, a word from the Lord to try to manipulate and control and get their way. Don't fall into that trap. The man tell me a few years ago after the service, it's very well-dressed, very successful that if I didn't let him start ministering on some Sunday mornings, the church was going to go down.

He said, Joel, I saw it so clearly. God showed me it's not going to last unless I get involved. That word from the Lord went in one ear and out the other. and not because there's not anything in between either. Since then we've grown by about 20,000 people. We're doing okay. What am I saying? Don't base any decision off of what somebody told you

that doesn't line up what you feel on the inside. You can hear from God for yourself. And if I would have been a people pleaser and run the church like that man wanted and ministered like he told me to, I wouldn't be where I am today. I would have his approval, but what good is that going to do me? I would rather have the approval of the creator of the universe.

I would rather have the God that spoke the worlds into existence smiling down on me. Sometimes in order to please God, you're going to have to displease people. This was hard for me. My personality is to want to please everybody. I want people to like me. When you follow what's in your heart, other people may not. be happy. They may not understand. You may fall

out of their favor. You may even lose a friendship. When my mother was 26 years old, my father decided to leave the church that he had been pastoring for many years. The congregation wasn't really behind his new doctrine of faith and

healing and miracles. My mother had friends there that she had for years since they were much younger. Those friends instead of celebrating my mother's new beginning. Instead of being happy for the new chapter in her life, they wouldn't have anything to do with my mother. Lifelong friends walked away all because my father decided to launch out on his own. I love what Jesus said in Luke 18. He said, if anyone gives up family, friends, houses,

for my sake, in this life, they will be paid back many times over. Notice, it doesn't say when you get to heaven, God will bless you. It says right here on the earth, if you give up anything for God's sake, he will reward you more than you can even imagine. My mother lost all of her friends. They

wouldn't give her their approval anymore. But can I tell you, God is a faithful God? My mom got a whole lot of more new friends, people more than she could even imagine. But my parents, it would have been easy for them to stay in the boat and play it

safe and keep the approval of family and friends in the community. But at some point, God is going to ask you to get out of the boat. It wouldn't be as difficult if all of our friends and family members were behind us, cheering us on, encouraging us. But most of the time, a friend that you've known a long time, someone that you really look up to is going to try to convince you to stay where you are. Maybe even like my parents, they'll give you an ultimatum. stay here and we'll support you. Don't leave and we'll give you our approval, but if you leave, you're on your own. Now that's when we have to say with the Apostle Paul, I would rather please God than be popular with people. Don't let the fear of people hold you back. What are they going to think?

What are my friends going to say? Will my relatives all support me? The truth is, like with my parents, some of them may walk away. But here's what I've learned. If they leave you, you didn't need them. God said he would never leave us nor forsake us. So if they walked away, if they betrayed you, if they left and you needed them, that would mean God was forsaken you. We know God can't lie.

So you can draw the conclusion, if they left me, they weren't a part of my destiny. If they don't want to be my friend, I don't need them. If they won't give me their approval, no big deal. I have God's approval. Friends, life is too short to go through it. Controlled, manipulated, trying to please everybody, trying to win their approval. You don't need people like that.

If you keep falling into that trap, letting them put the guilt trip on you, making you feel bad because you don't call every time on cue, they're upset now because you didn't take their advice, you've got to go get them fixed up. That's going to keep you, from your destiny. Some of you are allowing the fear of losing approval,

the fear of what somebody will think, the fear of losing a friendship to keep you in a box that's not even you. You're so concerned about keeping them happy and winning their favor that you're missing out on the new things that God wants to do. And sometimes a well-meaning person can try to hold us back. Jesus told Peter that he was going to Jerusalem, them. Peter said, no, you're not Jesus. That's dangerous. You're going to stay here with me. Peter loved Jesus. He was concerned about him, but he didn't understand his destiny.

What God has put in your heart, sometimes well-meaning people may not understand. It doesn't mean that you write them off, you never speak to them again, but you do have to be strong and say, this is what I believe is a part of my destiny, and I'm going to move toward it. You've got to do it with or without their approval. That's what Jesus did. He looked at Peter and said, get behind me. I'm going to Jerusalem.

He was strong, he was firm, but he wasn't disrespectful. He didn't say, I'm never going to speak to you because you don't agree with me. Jesus simply spoke the truth in love and went on to fulfill his destiny without Peter's approval. In the same way,

you will not become everything God's created you to be with the approval of everyone around you. I would love to tell you that all of your family and friends will be there to cheer you on and encourage you and support you. But most of the time,

somebody will get jealous. Somebody won't understand. Somebody will start talking about you, trying to belittle you, trying to discredit you. You can either get in there and fight that battle and try to prove to them that you're right and they're wrong. Or you can take the

high road. A much better approach is to have the attitude, I love them, but I don't have to have their approval. It's okay if they don't understand. I'm not going to get bitter if they start talking. I'm not going to lose focus and try to fight that battle. I know I have Almighty God's approval. And he's promised if I give up anything for his sake, he will reward me greatly. That's a powerful attitude.

When you're secure enough in who you are, you're confident enough in the destiny in front of you that even when people don't celebrate you, when on purpose they overlook you, ignore you and withhold their approval, doesn't matter. You got a smile on your face. You keep moving forward, keep being your best. Let me tell you, you do that and nothing will be able to stop you. The creator of the universe will break down every barrier and get you to where you're supposed to be. Let me challenge you. Keep a good attitude. Shake off the negative voices. Don't pay any attention to the naysayers that are trying to discredit you and make you look bad. I've learned if you'll stay in faith, the more they talk, the higher God will take you.

And sometimes we think, you know, I got to have this person, Joel, they're so important and influential. This boss, he has so much seniority. This family member, they know so many people. Now listen, the scripture says, promotion doesn't come from people. Promotion comes from the Lord. You may not have the approval of someone that's, quote, important, influential. Don't waste your time trying to win their favor. Spend your time trying to win the favor of God.

How do you do that? By being a person of excellence. By having an attitude of faith. By blessing your enemies. By being good to people. When you do that, you are currying favor with the creator of the universe. He will fight your battles. God will bring you those divine connections.

people that are not jealous and critical, but people that celebrate you, people that cheer you on. And some of you today, you need to make changes. You're spending too much time playing up to people, trying to buy their friendship, trying to win their approval. All that's doing is causing you to spin your wheels. You're not going anywhere. You need to look inside and discover what God's put in you, and then get focused and start moving toward that. You don't have to be. You don't have to be. You don't have, have time to try to convince everyone to like you. Your destiny is too great to waste time fighting battles that don't matter. If somebody doesn't celebrate you, move on. If they walked away, you didn't need them. If they didn't give you their approval, don't worry about it. You have

God's approval. Now take the pressure off yourself. Playing up to people takes a lot of energy. trying to keep everybody fixed and happy is very draining wondering what everybody thinks is emotionally exhausting. There's a freedom when you realize I don't have to compete for anyone's approval. I can just run my race,

focus on my goals, be my best, and God will take care of the rest. Joyce Meyer is a good friend of ours, great Bible teacher. She told how when she first started her ministry, she was in a small classroom in a little church. Every week she'd have a Bible study and about 40 people would come out.

Her husband Dave would sit there on the front row supporting her. One week after the class, the pastor called them aside and said, Dave, this is out of order. You should be up there teaching and Joyce should be sitting on the front row supporting you. They were young. They didn't want to disappoint the pastor,

didn't want to go against what he was saying. After all, he could put them out of that church. That's where all their friends were. And this pastor, he was a good man, but he didn't know what God had put in Joyce's heart. He didn't know she had that incredible gift to teach. To not be disrespectful to the pastor. Dave got up and started teaching. Joyce sat on the front row. And yes, it was good that they were willing to come under authority. And I'm not by any mean saying that if it's in your heart, just be rebellious and do whatever you want. But I am saying this, we shouldn't let other people run our lives. Some people can't even run their life,

and they're trying to tell you how to run your life. Several weeks went by, and Joyce was miserable, Dave was miserable. He didn't like teaching. That's not what he was called to do. One day, Joyce finally got back up there and started teaching again. Sure enough, the pastor asked them to leave. He didn't accept them. They didn't have that approval anymore. But thank God, Joyce knew that she had God's approval. She's been doing pretty good ever since then. But when we come to the end of our life, we're not going to stand before people. We're going to stand before God. It's not going to be a good excuse to say, God, I didn't fulfill my destiny because my friends wanted me to do this. My coworkers pressured me and put me in this box.

God, my family wouldn't give me their approval. I was just trying to keep everybody happy. No, run your race. Fullfill your destiny. It's great when we have the approval of others, but we have to accept the fact that not everyone is going to understand what you're called to do. And they're going to try to put you in their box. And if you're a people pleaser, you're going to miss the awesome future that God has in store. A few years after my father went to be with the Lord, our old sanctuary filled up. The church had really grown and we needed a bigger place.

My father had always told how he would never move the church. He would keep it at that location. Me being the new pastor, I wasn't about to rock the boat and change anything. We researched to see if we could build a larger facility on that same exact property. Found out the roads weren't big enough. So we went out to the freeway as close to that other location as possible, but both times the property didn't work out. When I got the word that this place was coming available,

the former compact center. It's about 20 minutes from our other location. Something leaped on the inside. I knew this was supposed to be ours. 99.9% of the congregation was totally behind it. The vast majority was very excited, but there was one man that was not behind it. In fact, he was totally against it. And he made sure he let me know every week after the service. He would come find me in the visitor's reception. He was, said, Joel, you know, your father said he would never move the church. You're making a big mistake. And I just want to let you know, if you move it, I'm not going to come. I said, you promise? I didn't, but I thought it. But everybody has a right to have their opinion, but he didn't know

what I was feeling on the inside. He didn't know what God was speaking to me. I could have easily let him put me in his box and keep us from moving forward. The easy thing to do was to stay in the boat and just play it safe where we were. But sometime God is going to ask you to get out of the boat. What I'm saying is don't be surprised if a friend or a family member doesn't try to convince you to stay where you are. They may mean well, but you've got to be strong and follow what God has put in your heart. I don't like to displease people, but I've learned I may have to displease a few people so I don't displease God. Now, I never like to see one person leave the church, but I've found if I'll stay true to my heart for everyone that leaves, God will send me two dozen more in return.

Now when somebody complains, when somebody threatens to leave, I have a new approach. I just smile and say, can I show you the door? The sooner the better. I may not say it, but that's what I think. Here's my point. You cannot please everybody. You have to stay true to your own heart. Usually the people that make the loudest noise, the people that take most of your time and energy, the moment you hit the smallest bump in the road, they're the first ones to leave. You would be better off to not play up to them now. Save your time and energy for people that you know are behind you, people that are with you through thick and thin. I love loyal people. I love faithful people. I have people in my life right now, friends, family, staff, many of you that I know they will give me their approval till the day I die.

I feel like it's every one of you, but you know, I know God has put people in my life that celebrate me and give me the freedom to become who he's created me to be. Here's what I'm saying. God has put the same type of people in your life, the right people. Now, don't waste your time trying to win the approval of someone that's never going to be. to give you their approval. Your destiny is too great to allow someone to manipulate you. Some of you don't realize it, but you've been addicted to approval. You've been living to please people. But thank God today is a new day. Strong holes are being broken. I can feel a freedom in this place. You know today that you don't need other people's approval. You have Almighty God's approval.

If you will be strong and run your race, stay focused, not let other people. control you. Let me declare it. You're going to step into a new level of your destiny. You're going to see new seasons of growth, new friendships, new opportunities. I believe and declare. God is going to take your places that you've never even dreamed of. If you receive it, can you say amen? Amen. We never like to close our broadcast without giving you an opportunity to make Jesus the Lord of your life. Would you pray with me? Just say, Lord Jesus. I'll repeat. I'll repeat. I'll repeat. You. I'll of my sins. Come into my heart. Wash me clean. I make you my Lord and Savior. Friends, if you prayed that simple prayer, we believe you got born again. Get in a good Bible-based church. Stay strong.

God's going to do amazing things in your life. It's a new year, an opportunity for a fresh start. It's a new year. Time to forget the struggles of the past and make room for new blessings. It's a New Year, the perfect time to build expectation and faith for an amazing new season. The beginning of the year is a great time to start a fresh and anew, to let go of negative things of the past, and to get ready for the new things God has in store. Every January, we create a new devotional calendar. When you start off each day in faith, grateful for what God has done, making positive declarations over your future, you're setting the tone for a blessed day and victorious year. This devotional calendar will help you get your mind going in the right direction

so you can live in faith expecting the goodness of God. As our way of saying thank you for your gift of any amount this first month of the year, we would like to send you a copy of our brand new 2025 365 day devotional calendar. Using this devotional calendar is as easy as one, two, three. One, wake up with an expectancy in your heart. Two, reflect on the daily scripture verse and devotional from Joel. Three, capture the Lord's promises to you on journaling lines for writing and reflection. This is going to be one of your best years. Our 2025 devotional calendar is going to help you stay in faith and see the goodness of God in ways you've never seen.

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