Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - A Mary Christmas: Our Final Mary!

Episode Date: December 19, 2024

In the final episode of our holiday series, we sit down with the one and only Mary in our company! We also reflect on the highlights and challenges of the year—and unravel the hilarious story of why Jono ended up tossing his poop out the window! Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and a wonderful Christmas Day!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This John O'Bend podcast brought to you by HelloFresh, the experts in tastes that Kiwis love. That's the instrumental version that caught me off guard there. Welcome along to the series finale of We Wish You a Merry Christmas. It's been a lot of fun over the last few days. What a season it's been. Met some wonderful Marys, haven't we? I think we start every podcast saying we've met some wonderful Marys. But it's been a more enjoyable journey.

To be honest, this was your idea, Ben, and I had zero faith in it. But we have met some cracking people. And a great Mary's and a great Karen, too, as well, haven't we? But today we've got a Mary that's been passed on the details. We said we wanted to close the loop on Amiri, didn't we? Yesterday, and we wanted to talk to Amiri in the building, and apparently we didn't have one. Oh, so we thought

we have details of Amiri passed on to us now, who works with us at NZME. She doesn't know we're calling though, eh? No. So she might not want to talk to us. Yeah. Well, she's, um, I think she's a sales rep. So she might not want to talk to us. Well, she's, I think she's a sales rep. So she might answer the phone, thinking it's a client.

Did you press enter? Yeah. Try again. Going through to Mary. Works upstairs. Hopefully she answers. Hello, Mary speaking. Oh, Mary! Mary!

John, I've been at Megan from downstairs, Mary. Oh, hello. How are you? Caught you a little off guard. Welcome. You're part of our award, well, soon to be award winning podcast. We wish you a Merry Christmas. Phoning Mary's from all around the motu.

Oh, cool. Yeah, Merry Christmas. Yeah, Merry Christmas to you, Mary. We wanted to talk to a Mary in the same, in the building and you are the Mary in the building

so Merry Christmas. Oh, thank you. Do you know... There's not many of us, obviously. No, there's, well, Mary, we spoke to Mary Death

who is ironically a funeral director. Yeah. We spoke to Mary Turner who's a wonderful real estate agent and good time to buy. Then we spoke to Mary Turner, who's a wonderful real estate agent, good time to buy. Then we spoke to Mary and Robbie,

a couple who'd travelled all around the country in a caravan with their young one-year-old child. Then things got a little wayward because we tried to track down a Mary at a bookstore and Karen answered. She was lovely. So now we're back to another Mary for the final one. That's you.

Oh, awesome. Yeah, happy to help. Nice to hear from you. Yeah, good. Happy to help. Nice to hear from you. What's the year been like for you, Mary? Yeah, it's been, I don't know, pretty good. Looking forward to the holidays for sure. Has it been

a trying year? It's not a performance review, by the way. You don't have to worry about this. Not going straight up to management. It's going to be a bit of a run of the mill year. What would you be the highlight? The highlight.

Your personal highlight for you. High, low, buffalo. Yeah, a high, a low, and then a buffalo. Something funny that happened. This is really putting you on the spot. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah. Highlight, probably.

Could be personal. It could be something you did that was cool. You saw a concert, you travelled, you did something. Oh, yeah. Highlight would be probably going overseas to South Korea with some friends. Oh, wow. What was... How do you know a Korean greeting?

I had a friend called Kevin Kim When I was younger You know more Korean than me Had a horrific kimchi incident Do you want me to tell you about that Mary? I'm not sure Is it a little bit for radio? Yeah and I'll share it with you

So listen I went to Kevin Kim's house And his parents were lovely people, and they gave me some kimchi, and I hadn't tried kimchi before. Delicious. And it's, well, I tell you what, kimchi did not agree with me, Mary. I found myself in their facilities room, okay? And for whatever reason, nature had taken its course. Was it more than a Kim P?

It was. It was. And the more than a Kim P? It was. It was. And the flush wasn't working. Oh, goodness. I entered panic mode. Not what you want. I entered panic mode. So then I had to get the hand towel and pick up the remnants,

and I threw it out the window. Oh, my God. You didn't have to. None of this you had to do. How did you get that in there like a little parachute? It was like, are you scooping it out? Yeah. Anyway.

And what about toilet paper? Why was it the hand towel? Yeah. Because toilet paper, anyway. Let's not get into too much. Then I ran home. Let's not pick holes in this story, mate. I ran home, Mary.

Yeah. And I told my mum, Annie. I told her, you'll never believe what's just happened, Annie. She then, she goes straight, this is the love of a mother, straight to the garden shed, picks up the spade. Okay. Then we go back, traipsing up the road with a spade from the garden shed. Did a reconnaissance mission back into Kevin Kim's property with the spade. Annie scoops it up like a legend.

And we're wandering down the road with it. Oh, my God. Wow. Boom, into the compost heap at home. Problem solved. Case closed. Apart from the skid mark hand towel. Yeah.

And you leaving it like an exit. They're like, what's going on there? The Kims are missing a hand towel. Yeah. Granted. The toilet's not working. Did he ever ask you why you ditched after you ate the kimchi? I can't remember any follow-up on that one from Kevin Kim, actually. He can't remember a lot from his childhood.

It was a peeing incident. Honestly, your mother, she's an angel. I'm sorry that you had to hear that, Mary. Okay, so Mary, that wasn't your high. Was that the low of your year, that story? I think it was the low. You know, it can't be topped just hearing about that. So high South Korea holiday, low Giorno story.

And then was there something funny that happened to you this year? Our buffalo. High low buffalo, we like to call it. I don't know why. I mean, you're really putting me on the spot, guys. I can't. Nothing's coming to me. Sorry, but I'm sure everyone loves hearing about that story.

Yeah, no, sorry. Do you have any plans for your break over Christmas and summer? Yeah, I'm just going to head down to the South Island for a bit and spend lots of time with my brother and his family and my niece and nephew. Whereabouts in the South Island? Christ Church and Wanaka. Oh, beautiful.

Okay, what are the goals, dreams and aspirations for the next 12 months, Mary? She's just trying to get us off the phone. I shouldn't have answered this call. Mary's got work to do right now. I'd say in the next 12 months, I'm going to put a goal to you, get off answered this call. Mary's got work to do right now. I'd say in the next 12 months, I'm going to put a goal to you. Get off this phone call. How's that sitting right now as a goal?

Sounds good. Sounds good, yeah. Awesome Christmas. It feels like an achievable goal for all of us. Thanks, Mary. Hey, Mary, you have a merry Christmas, all right? Thanks for being a good sport. Okay.

See you. See you, mate. Bye. There we go. She was done by the end. Oh, fair enough. I mean, mate. Bye. There we go. She was done by the end. Oh, fair enough. I mean, she didn't have a work day. We're all sitting around like this is our work.

She's got shit to do. She's like, he hasn't called us. We've called her. So what did you think of the series? The series finished? It was fun. It was fun. I don't know if we need a series two.

It was fun though. We'll be back. Back again next year. Merry Christmas. And have yourself a Merry Christmas.