Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - A private investigator tells us how to spot a liar

Episode Date: June 17, 2025

Jono, Ben & Megan have been trying to trick each other all week, so Julia Hartley Moore (private investigator, author and producer) joined us with FASCINATING tips on how to spot a liarSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Good morning, how you doing? Well as we should say to you, bonjour, bonsoir. You're living in France now. Good morning was great, we had a good start. Yeah I blew it, I blew it. Now Julia you're a private investigator and one of us is gonna go and go on the run, disappear from the show. No one knows who it is. The person who is on the run is, they know they're disappearing. But it's just been a week of a web of lies amongst all of us trying to put everyone off the scent. You've spent your years tracking down people, investigating people. What are some telltale signs that someone's lying? Okay well it's behavioral changes right. Say if you were interrogated or questioned you know and

you were just asked normal questions, your breathing, the way you act would remain the same, okay, so nothing changes. If you're up the ante and you start asking harder questions and then you look at how you're behaving and say if you're super relaxed, your hands are relaxed, your eyes are, your body is, your breathing is, but all of a sudden that starts elevating because the questions get a bit harder. Then it's kind of called a cluster. It's just not one behavioral thing that changes.

It's gotta be more than one. That's how you start to know someone has been deceptive. Say if one of you was being asked where you were at 10 o'clock at night and then you were just saying, well look I was home, everything was cool. And then the investigator said, well just think before you answer this. If I was to say to you that you were seen at 10 o'clock outside this particular place, what would you say to that? What do you know, how much do you know, Julia?

I was out for a run, I was out for a run. And if you're completely innocent, you would just say, well, I wasn't there. I mean, I wasn't there, like I just wasn't there. But if you were being deceptive, you might say something like, could have been there. I mean, I wasn't there, like I just didn't, I wasn't there. But if you were being deceptive, you might say something like, could have been there, I mean, what time? Well, I can't remember, but I could have been there.

So you just start fudging, you know, and- So when people are suspicious, you know, like we are now, but even like when relationships and stuff, how often when they're suspicious, are they correct? Yeah, 100%. All right. And What I find, which is really interesting, and this is no disrespect to you guys, but men have, look I see Megan's filing. But men have got to, I don't know what it is about you guys, but you tend to tell us that you're lying. The lying is in the truth.

Like you're trying to tell us the truth, but you're lying. It's like, well, what do you think? I had a woman here. Well, no, I never thought that. So why would you say that? You're filling in the details. Exactly. And it's something that guys do all the time.

I'm not cheating on you. No, I just asked why you're hiding your phone from me. details. Exactly, exactly. And it's something that guys do all the time. I'm not cheating on you. No, I just asked why you're hiding your phone from me. So what sort of methods do you use when you try and track down people for other, you know, find out if people are cheating or those sorts of things as a private investigator? Well, you know, surveillance is the best tool ever. I mean, it really is the best tool. But look, most people who come to us,

they know that's what's happening. They just want someone to confirm it for them. Pretty much 99.9% they are right. Because people just don't ring me out of the blue or ring us out of the blue. They've thought about this a long time. They've been watching changes in behavior, not just one, like clusters of them. And they've realised something's not right here. So I need someone else to verify it because they've probably

asked and asked and been told they're mad, they're crazy, you know. So just to put their mind at ease, they get us to come in and... Is it hard news for you to confirm to someone that their spouse has been cheating or do you find that it's almost a moment of relief for the person? It can be a little bit of both. I mean, it's look, like I say, most people really know it, but a lot of people don't want to hear it. Just for example, we had a client not so long ago and my guys were there watching. And as soon as she left the property,

a lady, a woman had arrived at her home. The lady and her husband got in the car and drove off to the beach with the two dogs. And my client sent me a photograph that her husband had taken of him on the beach with the dogs. And she said, oh, Julia, I'm so sorry. I've wasted all your time, you know he's just doing what he said he was going to do,

he's taking the dogs for a walk and I said hang on a minute, just wait and I sent her the photo that my investigator had taken of him, the woman holding hands and the dogs on the beach. My investigator was behind them, took the photo and so that's the real picture right? Right, it's heartbreaking. That so that's the real picture, right? Right. That's heartbreaking. That kinda sounds exciting to me. You don't do the stakeouts anymore?

Cause I- I think my nose would be a bloody Julius on my tail. Oh yeah. Julius would be in disguise with a mustache or something. Uh oh, uh oh. You know you're in the shit when Julius is on your tail. I gave that up a long time ago, but I've got my team out there and no one knows them so...

Can anyone be a really good liar? In your line of work have you come across someone you're like, gee I cannot tell if this person's lying or not. No look it's no usually people give themselves away and they don't know it like I remember when I first started I had interviewed this very lovely woman about an insurance scam. And everyone said, look, she's telling the truth. This is what happened to her car. She wasn't lying. I found some details online that said, yes, she actually is lying.

So I interviewed her. I met her and we were having a chat and everything was fine. The breathing and everything was fine. And then all of a sudden, as I upped the ante, the breathing started to elevate, the redness on the chest started. She gave it away, but she had convinced a lot of investigators on the way before, because she's pretty,

that she was telling the truth. But, you know, look beyond the looks. OK, so if you're going to look at the three of us right now. Well, this is the thing, well, yeah, because only one of us knows. So I'm saying I'm not the rogue. I'm not the looks. Okay, so if you're gonna look at the three of us right now. Well, this is the thing, well, yeah, because only one of us knows. So I'm saying I'm not the rogue. I'm not the rogue. And Jono has been saying he's taking a reverse angle.

I'm definitely the rogue. I'm on the run. I'm on the run, Julia, and making no bones about it. It's gonna be me. Okay, well you see, because I'm not sitting there looking at you, I can't see you properly. It's really hard to say. You'd have to, because you're saying that you say, because I'm not sitting there looking at you, I can't see you properly. It's really hard to say. You'd have to, you'd be, because you're saying that you are.

My heart rate's just fine by the way. Well, because he's not lying. He's not lying. I think in this case, I feel like gut feeling. None of us are lying. But one of you is, right? Yeah. Well, unless Jono is the rogue. Unless Jono, yeah, is the rogue and he's saying he is and therefore... We think he wouldn't back himself in the light. is the rogue. Unless Jono is the rogue and he's saying he is. We think he wouldn't back himself in the light.

So he's hiding in plain sight. He could very well be, but I'd need to be there with you guys. Alright, how much does it cost to fly you back from France? Oh Julia, I think we say this to you every time, we can talk to you for hours, but we do appreciate your time and hey, one thing, rest assured, we'll be harassing you in about six months for another conversation on the radio. Do people want to get in touch with you and the people that work for you, how do they go about that?

Well, you know, just go to the website, they can easily message us through that, it's no problem. And I'm always there, I mean I know everything that's going on it was just me and my dogs on the beach but anyway that's my story I'm sticking to it lovely to see you look after yourself same to you guys see you