Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Are eels actually aliens?

Episode Date: June 16, 2024

Welcome to the untamed realm of the world's Wild Wild Web!  Today we discuss why every eel goes to the Bermuda Triangle...   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today, I bring you a clip about Elon Musk, EELS, and the Bermuda Triangle all in one. Welcome to the untamed realm of the world's wide web. A swirling vortex of weirdness, bullying, and self-obsessed social media posts. In this digital jungle, Jono and Ben are your fearless guides. Leading you through the wildest parts of the wild, wild web. This is the wild, wild web. Howdy. Howdy, partner.

Hola. It's lovely to have you here, amigos. It's the wild web. Jono, Ben, Megan, we're here saying some stuff and doing a podcast. And I must say hello to Annie Pryor, a loyal listener to the Wild Wild Web. Oh, does she? She listens to the show edit together of the podcast. The podcast of the edit together of the show

and then listens to the Wild Wild Web. Oh, thanks Annie. She'll sit on the bed and the sun comes in through the windows in Christchurch. So there's not enough of you, Annie. We need more people listening. I know, not even my parents listen. Thank you.

Thank you, Annie Pryor, for your loyal listening ears. Now, Megan, you've been very excited about some Elon Musk audio you have to present. Firstly, you're a big fan of Elon. Oh, yeah. Not every, I don't, he's got some weird, wild views. You only like him because he's a billionaire. No, I just find him, like, really intriguing. You love all the South Africans, don't you?

Yeah, Trevanoa, Elon. Your husband's South African, yeah. She loves a saffir. Is that an offensive term? No, I don't think so. We say saffir all the time. Yeah, Andrew says it. Yeah.

But it's one of those ones where Andrew can say it. It means South African, does it not? Yeah, is it like saying a Kiwi? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, gotcha. I would have thought. I love how I say it and then I go, is that an offensive term? No, you? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, gotcha. Yeah. I would have thought. I love how I say it, then I go,

is that an offensive term? No, you're fine, you're fine. I wouldn't say it would be offensive. Oh God, don't tell me it's offensive. Reddit, well Reddit here have said, this person says, no, doesn't think it's offensive. No.

I'm sure it's just short for South African. Yeah. Saffir. It's like saying an Aussie. Yeah. Some older people may be offended if they're called that, according to this. Well, everyone's going to, someone's going to be offended somewhere. Yeah. Saffir. It's like saying an Aussie. Some older people may be offended if they're called that, according to this. Well, someone's going to be offended somewhere.

But generally speaking, we're not. We're not playing in dangerous territory. What's a great South African dish that you've tried? That you're like, well, they are nailing that, that we wouldn't have had here. So Andrew, your husband is South African? Yeah, I'm trying to think of the Afrikaans word for it. Basically, what is it called? They make like half a loaf of white bread, right?

And then you hollow it out and you put like a curry in it. Ooh. What is that called? That sounds nice. They also do fit cook, which is like a fried ball of dough, and then you stuff it with mince. Whoa, yeah. That's a side of thing.

Yeah, nice. They bloody love their meats over there, don't they? Yeah. Is it a brine? A brie. A brie? Brie. Is that a big barbecue?

Yeah, but usually over like a coal, not, you know, like a gas. Oh, right, smoky. Because it takes ages because they build the fire, and then you've got to let it cook down so it's just coals and it's heat and me and my husband are always like, God, this takes forever. Just fire up the barbecue.

Just hang on the bloody gas. You know, we've got a gas barbecue but it doesn't taste the same. That's probably one of those things that you put, yeah. They're like the flame grill situation. I'm sure it is delicious. Some people that Weber,

the Weber people, they love that. Yeah. Are you a Weber person yet? No, no. Came out with a jumbuck from Mitre 10. Yeah, that was a temporary one. I've got a Weber.

We've got a nicer barbecue than the Jumbuck. The Jumbuck was fine, but we've got a nice, but not a Weber one. No. Not a Weber. We're not allowed to use the Weber though. We have to make a fire. Our one's got a blue, like sort of a teal roof on the, like a lid. And my wife, that was the one she wanted.

And the guy in the store was like, there was an orange one. And he was like, can I give it to us as a discount? I'm like, yeah, take this one. wanted and the guy in the store was like, there was an orange one and he was like, can I give it to us as a discount? I'm like, yeah, take this one. I don't care what this one is.

She's like, no, I really like the teal colour. I'm like, not for the price. It's going to get covered in bloody grease. I think in the end

he gave us a discount on the teal one because it didn't have it in store. Because the all black weavers are more expensive than the ones that have like a white lid or whatever.

Yeah, this is not a weaver. This is not a weaver. But yeah, I was like, jeez, we're going to put it under a barbecue cover for like nine months of the year.

Why are we worried about it? Yeah. Is the Weber a better meat? Like if you cook it, say, on a Weber compared to a Jumbuck, can you notice a difference? Well, I think Weber's, you can do the coals and stuff. People that love it. Yeah, people cook pizzas on it.

Mate of mine cooks amazing pizzas on it. Wood fire sort of pizzas as well. Then they have the electric ones as well. Oh, the electric Weber's too. Yeah, people cook pizzas on it. Mate of mine cooks amazing pizzas on it. Yeah. Wood fire sort of pizzas as well. Then they have the electric ones as well. Oh, the electric Weber's too. Yeah, there is electric ones. Oh, yeah. But there's also ones you put the roll and you put a chicken up its butt and, you know, a can up a chicken's butt and then chuck it on the thing, you know.

It all tastes the same to me. Yeah, it does, yeah. My dad, he didn't have a Weber, but I distinctly remember growing up, he had this thing shaped like a Weber, but boy, just plumes of smoke. Just covering the neighbourhood. Like, look, the poor neighbours. Like, they, you know the smell of smoke smoke. They would have, like, all their clothes would have stunk.

But he loved it. He loves a smoky barbecue. Yeah. We live down from, like, I'm going to say who they are because it's all complimentary, from Haletau Brewery. And they do, like, wood-fired pizzas and wood fired pizzas and like a lot of like barbecue meats. Man, with the winds hitting it right, that time of the night you're like, oh God, it smells good. Do you go there a lot?

No. You don't? Oh, that's great. It's like walking distance. You should go Friday nights, mate. Or like Sundays, go have like a Sunday session. Never do. It's so stupid.

We go strawberry picking over summer and then you go to a hotel brewery. It's great. Yeah. Sometimes you don't even just go to the places in your own backyard, do you? Literally walking distance. Okay, so this Elon Musk audio. Jeez, we took a dog leg there with South Africans. Sorry, my fault.

This is what we played. Do you need to say anything before we end? This is why I love him because he's so random. This is him talking about eels and where they come from. So did you know that eels are the only animals in the world that we have no idea where they came from? Like the weird fish in the oceans. Scientists have done like observations of them and eels during a specific time in the year, regardless of where they are, will literally all travel to the Bermuda Triangle, and that's where they link up, no matter where they are from,

Europe, the freshwater rivers of the United States. When it's time to mate, they just all go to the Bermuda Triangle, and it's dangerous for scientists to study them, so it's a bit hard, so we don't really know where they originate from. And the females and males have no reproductive organs, so like, how do they reproduce? Also, they did a test where they put the eels inside a bucket, then when it was time to mate, they all swam in the direction of the Bermuda Triangle. You know, how people have speculated, like, octopusesuses being aliens right uh people think eels also

might not be from here and then the theory goes on to claim that there was a meteor that crashed in the bermuda triangle and allegedly crashed 65 million years ago coincidentally when the dinosaurs were gone now are you sure that's not bloody AI doing Elon Musk's voice about the... Now, I need to ask these questions because I've fallen into the trap of... So, I have done light research. Light, okay.

That video has been reproduced multiple times and I've seen news stories about Elon talking about it. And I don't imagine that he would relay information that wasn't factual. No, he knows what he's on about. He knows what he's on about. He knows what he's on about, yeah. Hey, we'll take a quick break from the Wild Web.

Back after this. Welcome back. I don't know. So the New Zealand eels in the Waikato River at one point this year are going to make their way to the Bermuda Triangle to mate. I was just looking up at that. So I'm looking at the government website DOC. And so there's some information on eels from New Zealand. Yeah.

So saying eels, especially at the end of it, eels can live up to 100 years and breed only once at the end of their lives. It's quite interesting. But in order to breed, they undergo mass spawning migrations, leaving the familiarity of lakes and rivers and swim all the way up to the subtropical Pacific Ocean.

Now, is that where the Bermuda Triangle is? Or not? Or do they go to another spot around this side of the world? Because Europe, it says online, Europe and America eels go to the Bermuda Triangle. Where do eels swim to to mate? So the other thing is... What about an eel farm, though? Like, we've got a friend whose brother works at an eel farm.

Yeah, they can't. Well, I mean, if they're captive, then how do they reproduce them? So no one knows how they reproduce. What about the eel farm though? Like we've got a friend whose brother works at an eel farm. Yeah, they can't. Yeah. But then how do they reproduce them? So no one knows how they reproduce. They don't have any reproductive organs. Where are they getting the eels from? There's a lot of questions. Jeez.

But so the idea with the Bermuda Triangle is there's been lots of unexplained like crashes, right? Planes and boats and... Yeah, so I don't think our eels go to the Bermuda Triangle for a quick look. Okay. But they still go to deep waters, so yeah. They go somewhere. Yeah, they go somewhere. Migration to mate.

Sorry. Yeah. So they go to the deep caves of the ocean. It says here, it says no matter where they are, they will all travel to the Bermuda Triangle. Is that not true? Okay, well, maybe it is. That is a TikTok story.

Why don't we know where eels come from? Oh, well, maybe it is. That is a TikTok story. Why don't we know where eels come from? Oh, God, they're disgusting. Well, Bermuda Triangle is in the Atlantic Ocean, according to this, and they're saying our ones go to the Pacific Ocean. So, I don't know. Anyway, it's wild that they wouldn't even mate in the rivers and stuff.

Yeah, they go and treat. Wow, yeah. That's a big journey, too. That's for an eel. Yeah. To make its way from, say, the river in Thames. Yeah. All the way At a hundred years

Like Joe Biden Swimming out to You know But they So every eel in the world Goes to a location Yeah Is that what they're saying?

So they all go out To when they decide to Yeah reproduce So there's a point there Where there's no eels in New Zealand They've all just gone off Oh no but I think it must be At this stage of their life

So it must be when they're like Closer to like a hundred years old Even our buddy Yeah Even our eels in New Zealand. They've all just gone off. Oh, no, but I think it must be at this stage of their life. So it must be when they're like closer to like 100 years old. Even our eels are going offshore, eh? Yeah. All the good things from New Zealand are going offshore. Better cost of living overseas. That's true. More opportunities overseas. It is wild.

Even for the eels. Yeah. It is wild. That's wild. Gross. Yeah, I've got a big fear of eels. God, he put me in a tank with him. It was a nightmare.

Did it make it better or worse, that picture that I just showed you? Oh, the eel eating its way out of a bird. So a bird had caught an eel and was flying, but then the eel was not today. And you can see it hanging out of the bird's neck. He had eaten its way out. Neither of them survived, though, because I think the eel fell to the ground

and the bird did not survive. That is a big drop for that eel, too. Yeah. That's why eels are nasty, disgusting creatures. The only fact I know about eels is they'll latch onto your penis and death roll it off. Jesus. Oh, my God. That's what they do.

Were you in a tank? You weren't naked, though, right? No. You have lots of clothes on. I wore two pairs because I'd heard this rumor. Two pairs of dogs. Did they bite you? No, no, no.

But they did. The guy we were talking about who had the eel farm, he's a friend's brother of ours. He told me that. He told me the eel fed. And he said they can suck onto your fingers. He said they can be quite aggressive. Yeah. Because they've got their back up.

I imagine so. If you probably stand on them accidentally or something like that, they're probably going to latch out, aren't they? I've never tried eel, smoked eel. So I've had it. Bony, right? Yeah, it was all right. There wasn't a lot of meat to it.

I quite like eating a chicken neck. So I imagine it would be similar to that, right? But you look at a lot of meat to it. I quite like eating a chicken neck, so I imagine it would be similar to that, right? But you look at a lot of the ocean's creatures. They are very alien-like. You know, there's fish, undiscovered fish, that are deep, deep, deep. Mariana Trench, the deepest part of the ocean, that scientists haven't even seen yet.

They're just living down in the dark. You know, every now and and then like a giant squid or some like unknown giant like floppy fish washes up on shore and everyone's like, hmm, where'd you come from? They are quite alien-like though, aren't they? It must be freaky if you're down there, right? Like anglerfish, have you seen those things?

No, what's that? With the little, are they the ones that have the little light on? Oh, yes. Like a Nemo. Yes, I know the one. And you're like, oh, what's that pretty little light? And then it's like, teeth and shit. Yeah, they kind of look like

piranhas with a little torch. I think that's just the tip of the deep ocean. Yeah, absolutely. Because they can't get deep enough to even research a lot of the time. And if that's an indication of what's down there, you don't want to know. That's why I don't like swimming in the ocean.

Are you not an ocean swimmer? Not really. Yeah, I get it. I get it. Especially when they're like, hey, it's getting warmer. Sharks and stuff are going to swim around. Yeah, there are some frightening looking fish down the bottom. This is not even – and the depths.

Look at that thing. Yeah, yeah. And they all look a bit aggressive because I imagine if you can't see what you're doing down there, you want to have your wits about you, don't you? Yeah, that's nasty.

Yeah, goolish. Yeah, crazy. You like swimming in the ocean, babe? I don't mind it. Yeah. I'm not like I'm not deep sea diving or anything like that though. Because I like going on the back of a boat,

like wakeboarding or going on a biscuit, but then you eventually fall off, right? And the boat's got to come back and get you. That's the most traumatic time. Your legs are dangling. You look down and it's dark and then something brushes past your leg. I'm like, oh God.

Yeah. No, I get it. But yeah, that's the worst part. I understand that. But you imagine like, I kind of think of that time, But Yeah That's the worst part I understand that But you imagine Like I kind of think At that time You know you're not

Actually there for that long Surely for someone To swim up from How long does it take For a shark to bite me in half Oh yeah not long But he's not Yeah that was true

I love those legends Who are like Oh I just fought the shark mate You know Oh yeah Every now and then It pops up on the news Yeah I thought I tussled around

With it Punched it in the face I'm not thinking about that If a shark's coming at me No I would be useless So I'd just be like You know? Oh, yeah. Every now and then it pops up on the news. Yeah, I thought I tussled around with it, punched it in the face. I'm not thinking about that if a shark is coming at me. I would be useless. I'd just be like, oh, well, I guess it's how it ends. It'd be a terrible way to go, wouldn't it? Yeah.

We spoke to a guy. Oh, he's batting the thing off with an oar or something. Was he surfing or? Was it a shark? Yeah. There was something. He was, yeah. He's like, get a lot, you know. I like to think that the pain would There was something He was Yeah He's like get a light You know

I like to think That the pain would be so great You wouldn't feel it You know Yeah And then you bleed out Yeah Before you

Felt anything Yeah Yeah Grim Well they actually I imagine they Well they do say Your chance of having a car accident

Is far more likely Than being attacked by a shark In the ocean Yeah you're probably right But the stats are... Very true. So you're not swimming in the...

No, I do. Like, I would only swim in the shallows. Right. But it's more when I'm out on, like, a biscuit or anything and people try

and flip you off. I'm like, do not flip me off. Oh, really? Because I don't want to dangle in the ocean. If you just mow materially,

you wouldn't swim. So you wouldn't swim across one point to another in the ocean. Oh, shit, no. Oh, really? No, no, no wouldn't swim across one point to another. Oh shit no. No really? You're really quite fearful of that. God no. Don't get any ideas. Your chance

of being attacked and killed by a shark are 1 in 3.75 million. Jeez. So nothing to worry about mate. I was on a jet ski once near Waiake Island in Auckland and there was at least like 6 hammerhead sharks that were swimming underneath us. And I don't think they attack, but like I don't want to fall in and hang out with them.

That was bloody terrifying. Also, like do hammerheads have other friends as sharks? You know, they're likely to – was there other ones in there with them? You think once? Yeah, well, maybe, maybe. Yeah. I was like, oh, my God, don't fall off now. Wow.

Are you going to tell me that hammerheads will eat you? No. So your odds are, so one in 3.75 million are being attacked by a shark. Odds of being struck by lightning are only one in 15,000. So you're more likely to get struck by lightning. One in 15,000. There you go. Even with your feet dangling in the water like that for a while.

Yeah. Ah, sheesh. There you go. See, that puts it all in perspective for you. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I'm still stuck on I hammer heads dangerous.

And there we go. That is today's Wild Wild Web. We covered some ground as usual. If you're stuck with us. They're not dangerous. In fact, their mounds are very small, so I probably couldn't bite you anyway. Oh, really?

Yeah. Okay. We're putting everyone's minds at ease. There we

go. We've got some stuff on the Wild Wild Web. We'll be back again tomorrow.