Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - August 04 - The Referndumb, Ben Tried To Give Himself A Nickname In School, The A To Z Of New Zealand

Episode Date: August 3, 2020

On today's podcast we talked to our mate Michael Batty who managed to get a partial refund for his tickets after Elton John couldn't finish his performance earlier this year. It was a 6-month battle, but he got the refund! Was it worth it? Who knows. We also played Synchronised Answering and we HAD A WIN!! An unlikely one too! Finally, we caught up with the reporter that broke the story that's going on with Ellen Degeneres and her show. Enjoy!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Hello, welcome. Welcome, welcome, welcome to the podcast. Yeah, it's great to have you guys here. I see you've done a good fashion thing this morning, matching your yellow singlet with yellow shoes. That's smart. Yeah, well at four in the morning I was like, is this the same colour when you're doing it in half-life? But I think it's pretty much the same colour, right? Because you've got your LeBron

James singlet on that you were scammed with on the internet, weren't you? Oh, I scammed the first time round, yes. Yeah, they tried to siphon out your credit card, didn't they? This is the legitimate one that I bought, it's hard to say. Actually, speaking of the NBA, something I found really interesting is their crowd at the moment. So they're in a bubble

playing basketball over there, and you know in the NRL, the league, they've got cardboard cutouts. Well, the NBA have gone one step further and they've got these big massive screens around. And then almost like a Zoom call, fans can actually be there on the screen watching the game. So you can actually pop up watching the actual NBA game. In real time?

In real time. You could never trust New Zealanders to do that. Imagine all the stuff that people would be putting in front of their web cameras. It would be a disaster. What I found really interesting the other day, there was one of the teams that was getting beaten by quite a lot. Half the fans went.

Even on the screens. They were just blank. They're like, I've had enough. I'm gone. They're at home. They're probably in lockdown, not doing much but they're still like just empty chairs and all those things. So even like an actual sporting game, players... You think the organisers would then just replace their call

with someone else? Let's make it look like a packed stadium. Yeah, it's another very interesting thing that's going on in the NBA. But it would be silent wouldn't it, inside the stadium? Yeah, it would be. Yeah, you're right. Maybe you should turn the sound on if they can all figure out how to turn their sound on like my parents they might have it all sorted by the end

of the game but so people can still abuse them and cheer in real time too. Exactly Now we've got a fun podcast for you today because it was a fun show. Mike Hoskins car, we've got it. We took it out and about today. Max who works with us on the show, he took it out and about and dropped some people off around town. Yeah we also spoke to a journalist from BuzzFeed

who has been investigating this Ellen DeGeneres show, scandal, saga. She gives us the hot tea on that. Is that even a thing? Can you give us the hot tea? Yeah, she gives us the hot tea. Just don't spill it. And as well as that, a guy, a friend of ours,

has made national headlines for getting a refund. International. Taking Elton John to task. Elton John. I know. When you hear about it, I don't know how you'll feel. But anyway, enjoy it on the podcast.

The radio version of Morning Breath. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. It's been kind of sad to read in the news over the last few months. Things seem to be falling apart behind the scenes on the Ellen DeGeneres talk show, right? Yeah. For a few months, it feels like the rice has been boiling out of the rice cooker. That's a wonderful analogy, isn't it, there, for Ellen DeGeneres.

The nice person persona is unravelling. Staff is saying they've been mistreated, which is the opposite of what her public persona is. And word this week that she might quit the show and be replaced by James Corden Ben. Yeah, a lot of things are going on, or seem to be going on. Alan has issued an apology for some of the things

that have happened on her watch. I'm just waiting for all of your horrible things to be unearthed in such a public fashion. Well, that's true. That's probably still coming. But we thought we'd find out a bit more information about what the heck is going on. So we've tracked down someone from international website BuzzFeed. That's right.

She's been following the story. She's been talking to our former Ellen staffers. Her name is Christy Yandoli. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast, Christy. Thanks so much for having me. How long have you been following the Ellen story, shall we say? So I've been reporting on this story since april although there have been whispers in hollywood for a long time um about what former employees on the show say about their experiences

in the entertainment industry and then in april there is a story in variety with crew members who were unhappy with their treatment during the coronavirus pandemic. So in April, I started to hear from and reach out to current and former employees, and that's kind of where my experience in reporting the story started. There's obviously, there's word and rumor of sexual misconduct, workplace bullying, that sort of thing. Does this come as a surprise to you in a production in Hollywood? I don't think we've seen a lot of reporting on what this can systemically look like, you know, behind the scenes, you know, over 17 years on one show. And I think the especially surprising thing to viewers and to former employees is Ellen's publicly facing be kind messaging, which does not match up with their experiences.

Well, that's the thing. That's the shock, I guess, for us as someone who's watched the show for many years. As you say, she comes across so be kind and lovingly and all that. So for this to be going on behind the scenes is a big shock for the public. Sure. It's shocking to viewers. And like I said, former, you know, dozens and dozens of former employees have told me that was an issue they had was not only is it difficult to deal for them to have dealt with a toxic work environment, but the fact that they felt like they were keeping this big secret because of the be kind messaging that Ellen profits off of and has built an entire brand around

felt ironic and more painful to them. Maybe if she was a horrible person on screen, it wouldn't be such a shock to everyone. This is what I do. I just be a terrible human being publicly and no one's shocked. But why do you think it's all unraveling now for Ellen? If it's been going on for 17 years, as you say, why now? I think that people started to feel like the conversation was starting to open up. The Variety story from April, even though the crew members were anonymous in it,

it was really one of the first stories about, you know, the behind-the-scenes environment of the show. The more people speak out, the more people I hear from and the more people feel empowered to share their experiences. We're talking to Christy Yandoli. She is a reporter for BuzzFeed. She's been investigating the Ellen DeGeneres news story. Now, Ellen has apologised.

She sent out a letter earlier this week, I think, for things that have gone on in her environment under her watch. What do you think is going to happen next to Ellen? I know it's probably hard to speculate, but do you think she'll stick around? It is hard to speculate. You know, Ellen's apology came on Thursday and then we had a follow-up story

that was published after her statement. So, Andy Lassner, who's an executive producer, emailed staff members on Friday and said everything is set to move ahead as scheduled in regards to filming. There have been rumors about, you know, will Ellen step down?

None of that is substantiated. Staffers will receive some kind of update this week about, you know, what that looks like for them. If you were Ellen, would you just go, oh, this is too hard. I'll just sit on top of my giant pile of money and forget about it. It is incredibly hard for me to imagine being Ellen. Right. I don't know.

And, you know, to be clear, it is not really up to me to decide what accountability looks like on behalf of Warner Media and Warner Brothers and Telepictures and you know Ellen herself that doesn't lie on me although I am definitely interested to see and former employees who I'm speaking to are definitely interested to see you know what the parent company finds in their internal investigation and how they decide to move forward. Do you think it's unusual that Ellen's been doing this show for 17 years, the production has been happening, and from what I've seen, no real celebrity has come out to support

in any way, shape or form? She must have many celebrity mates, right? Yeah, you know, I think that's an interesting maybe next phase of this news cycle. Over the weekend, a couple of people did, you know, I think an actor from Everybody Loves Raymond, which tweeted out that this was common knowledge in the know, everyone loves to see people's top fall. I don't know. Some people are slowly speaking, but to your point, not many. And I think people might be waiting to see what happens.

Ellen is a powerful, popular celebrity herself who has this incredibly huge platform. So I think people are just waiting to see how it falls out. This is all evolving pretty quickly. Christy Andoli from BuzzFeed has been following and reporting on the Ellen story. Thank you very much for your time this morning. Appreciate it. Thank you so much for having me. This is your new breakfast.

Health Star rating, still pending. It's Jono and Mano Mahet. You remember, it was early in the year that Elton John was in New Zealand. He played a concert

and he had walking pneumonia. He tried to sing for a bit. He said to everyone he was sick. He went off stage. He came back on. He battled through. He broke down in tears.

He played for over an hour, but because the set list was released everywhere, people were like, he didn't play this song, he didn't play this song, all these songs that he was meant to play on this world tour. So last night we read a news story that an Auckland man has won a six-month fight with a tribunal over getting a refund for some of the money back that he spent on the Elton John concert. 40% refund. 40% because he thought he was

entitled to 40% because he missed out on 40% of Elton John. And we read further into the story and it turns out this man who had been in the six month Elton John battle all through COVID and coronavirus, he's stuck with it is our friend Michael Batty who we've worked with before. We have, we know him

really well and he's been like of course Michael Batty's done this. He's a lovely We have. We know him really well, and he's been like, of course Michael Batty's done this. He's a lovely guy, but he doesn't like the man to win. He's a stickler. It's all about principle with him, right? It is. He wants the little guy to win. So we're going to go through to Michael Batty now,

because you may be entitled for a refund too. Hello, Michael speaking. Is that Batty in the jets? How are you, mate? It's John O'Baird calling from the Hits radio station. I understand you're a busy man. You've got multiple radio interviews today. I mean, no guy's going to be taking it easy

while he's in the midst of taking down Elton John. Batty and the Jets is a good one. That's the best one I've heard all morning. Very, very good. I imagine you would have heard a few. But, yeah, so how long have you been fighting this thing for since, well, I guess the concert? Well, everyone keeps, you know, using the word fighting.

I was just kind of sitting on my couch with my feet up, really. It wasn't really a big deal. But, no, I originally sent in the refund complaint, you know, pretty much straight after the concert. It was only after kind of chug was going on, saying that there didn't need to be refunds and Consumer New Zealand stated that there didn't need to be refunds that that really just started to grind my gears. You were sending them an email on the train

right on the way home from Mount Smart. It was really, really getting my back up. So, no, then I asked them again politely and when they said no, then I filed for the disputes tribunal. And then I finally got to talk to the bigwigs who were offering me all kinds of settlement deals and signing confidentiality agreements. And I just said no. Hush money.

They wanted to pay you out. And so is this a win for the little man, Michael? Mate, I'm just fighting a good fight here for the people that were there that night, you know? But hang on. You're entitled to a 40% refund, so go harass Ticketmaster for it. But hang on. Elton John. I mean, the guy was sick.

He tried so hard. He had walking pneumonia. He tried to sing. He went off. He came back on. His voice was croaky. He was crying on stage. He played for over an hour.

It's only because he's a setlist out there that you thought, oh, he's going to play all these songs. Surely that's enough, isn't it? I totally see that side of things, but I think what people don't understand is Elton John gets paid millions of dollars nevertheless. All he's got to do is turn up and walk on stage. The guys that actually get the money are the promoter and Ticketmaster, and the promoter was just spinning all sorts of lies, and Ticketmaster was being difficult. So just spinning all sorts of lies and Ticketmaster

was being difficult. So I've got nothing but good things to say about Elton. Oh, and he'll appreciate that. He'll appreciate that. But you know, it's not his money.

Chug Entertainment are insured for those kind of things and they're just not providing refunds based on the fact that we saw just over half of a concert,

which, nah, in my book, that doesn't really matter. Well, it's fair to say you couldn't feel the love that night. Did he even play Can You Feel the Love Tonight? He didn't get round to it. Sad, sad songs, guys. Sad, sad songs. And so now is your advice

to the other Elton John attending community to go and get your 40% refund. Well, look, if I got 40% back, then everyone that night should be entitled to 40% back. So I'd say shoot Ticketmaster an email or get on the phone to them. If they say no, then, you know, use me as an example and say, well, how come he got 40% back? And even if you don't want your 40% back,

even if you had a good time that night, get your 40% back and give the money to charity or something, you know. Stop lining their pockets with it. And so how get your 40% back and give the money to charity or something, you know? Stop lining their pockets with it. And so how much is 40% back from the concert? Well, it depends on your ticket, right? Well, yeah, it depends how much you paid for tickets. I mean, we paid over $1,000. So we got just over $400 back.

Oh, okay. That's a lot of money. That's a load of money. I mean, it's a lot of money for a lot of people. Yeah, well, Michael Batty, when we read that, we're like, of course it's Michael Batty, eh? The guy who will just keep going.

I'm just fighting the good fight, mate. Cave Crusader over here. You know, Auckland is no better. Hopefully this qualifies as a full interview. You were happy with the length of this?

This was okay for you? This was good. Okay, this is what we promised? Good. We can give you another 40% tomorrow. No, no, no. You won't be hearing from my lawyer. Michael Batty, I'm still standing.

He definitely is. He's got his money back from Elton John concert. Thanks for your time, buddy. See you, guys. Some people skip breakfast, the meal, and also this show. It's Jono and Ben on the Hits. Elton John, it seems like a lifetime ago. He was in New Zealand in February.

It was big news at the time because he had what was described as walking pneumonia. Oh, yeah. I didn't quite figure out what walking pneumonia was as opposed to standing still pneumonia or coronavirus. No, no, it definitely wasn't that. He was very sick, Elton John. And he came on stage and he battled his way through the concert. And he went off and I think he came back on again and he was losing his voice and

Producer Humphries, you were there and he played for over an hour, didn't he? Yeah, well, yeah, it was over an hour and you could see that he was struggling, you know. He was crying too, wasn't he? He was crying and he was putting in his best efforts. And when you're sick, you're sick. Humans get

sick. He battled on. He kept coming back. He was like, I know you couldn't do it anymore. And they're like a boxer, you know, who's just like the ref throws in the... It's like, I had enough. He collapsed on the piano in a Diamante suit. Yeah.

There's not more... The man couldn't have given any more. I was just grateful for the hour, 10 minutes that we had with him. But not everyone felt that way because there was a set list of Elton John's world tour, you know, they've been circulating around of all the songs

that he was meant to play and he didn't get to some of them because obviously he went off stage and so a friend of ours has been battling to get his a partial refund

putting him into that concert our friend Michael we've worked with for many years lovely guy but he's one of those people who's like it's the principle

yeah it's the principle and he's the guy who Yeah, it's the principal. And he's the guy who'll stand up in a restaurant and complain and demand a refund. And the guy that if you're having dinner with him, you hold your head in shame. Yeah, but he's well within his rights. He's one of those people. Like, he's not doing anything wrong.

He's within his rights to do this. And he's now got 40% back of his money. He's taken it to the disputes tribunal because at first the promoter's's like, oh mate, go, you know, whatever. Go away. I'll ignore this little piece. This little ball ache will go away. He's gone to the Disputes Tribunal and yesterday he's been awarded 40%. What is that? Like, what do you got? 60 to 80 bucks? 60 to 80 bucks I would have thought. This is six months

on. It's the principal. It's the principal. Six months on. And the paperwork and the time and the hours that you would have put into this. And he probably got a voucher. But he got a win in his mind. I imagine he's got a win. But now he's gone public. He's all through the media today, Michael.

He's like, if I got it, then everyone else needs one. The promoter will be like, oh, God. So you've got to go for it? No, look, it comes down to probably the fact that, you know, the time and effort to go to it. And like I say, it was a great hour and 10 minutes that we had there. And so for me, it's probably not really worth it.

We'll turn your mic off. I'm all for consumer rights. I love watching fair go and watching grubby used car salesmen run away from cameras chasing them. But this is one step too far. We'll find out why. I'll give them the 60 bucks. You were saying there was,

there's people like, you know, like Michael, that like to get their money's worth and people like using vouchers and things as well. yeah, look,

it just, it's extremely frustrating, like embarrassing for me when, when you, someone complains at a restaurant or anything like that and recently,

I got a text from a friend from down in Christchurch who was coming up to Auckland and she said, let's go out for dinner. I said, great, where do you want to go? Is there anywhere in Auckland that you want to try? And she suggested this spot out in the Wapwaps. And I was like, oh, that's a bit odd.

I don't know why we're going there. Anyway, we went out there and it was perfectly fine dinner. And then she said, oh, this one's on me. And she went into her handbag and pulled out a clear file full of vouchers. I shrunk into my seat. It was so embarrassing. Was it like a 10% off or a 20% off?

I don't know. She just had like, there was vouchers in there for everything. I bought those bloody fundraising books. The entertainment guy. Making the kids all jacked up on and selling. Yeah, I've never once used the 8% to 10% off. And when you do,

they make you feel like a miserable human being. Oh, here you go. Hold on, I've got a voucher. And you can lick the top of your finger and just flip through them. Hang on, which page is this? Yeah, yeah.

And it throws the attendant at the counter. They're never happy to see a voucher. No. No one's happy to see a voucher. Although you need to have your admin across them, don't you, if you get them over Christmas. That's very funny.

Hey, thank you very much for coming in, Ben. Wake up and smell them. Actually, no, please don't smell them. That's odd. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Time to sync up some answers to hopefully give you a prize. Synchronise answers. Yeah, this is a fun game.

This is New Zealand's favourite game behind how quickly can I honk my horn at the motorist in front of me after the light turns green. Some people are so quick on that, eh? Oh, yeah. I love being quick on it. Love putting the pressure on other motorists. The anxiety levels up out there on the roads.

Nothing like anxious drivers. Kim, welcome to the show. How are you? Good. Yes, I am. Yeah, we're good. How's Tarua this morning? Oh, yeah, good. A bit cold. Yeah, we're good. How's Tarua this morning? Oh, yeah, good.

A bit cold. Yeah, a bit cold. What do you do, Kimbo? I'm a kindergarten teacher. Kindergarten. It better be called the kindergarten if it's not. I think we've had this joke before, guys. Oh, have we spoken before?

Come on, John. I love your game, mate. Get some new material. Get some new gear. Get some new gear. Go back to school. I was waiting for it. Start at kindergarten, go back to school, learn some more jokes, all right? All right, Kim, I apologise for rehashing that gag.

But do you know how this game works? Juliette's going to throw out a category. Ben and I have to sync up and answer. If we do so, we steal the movie tickets off you for Reading Cinemas. Oh, no. They're all yours at the moment, but we might not sync up our answers, so here's the first question. Name for me something you'd find

in a bathroom. Flannel. Oh! What the hell? What? Put that in your kindergarten. What the hell? Flannel What? Put that in your kindergarten. What the hell? I didn't think you were flannel.

All the stuff you can have in a bathroom, we both said flannel. What the hell? This is too much energy for this time of morning. I apologise if you're listening. I always try and get the prize for the person, so I go random. What are you doing? Kim, you know how this show works. Ben off air is going to feel too bad.

He's going to send you the tickets anyway. Just hold the line, Kim. I hate it when he does this, but this is what he does. I know it's inevitable. So listen, you're going to walk away a winner. We walk away winners. Everyone's a winner. No one's a loser on this show.

For once, I just want some losers. Oh, wow. What a moment. Kim, hold the line, my friend. And that's how you play Synchronised Answer. I can't believe we got flannel out of all the things in the bathroom. Mate, you name everything that you can have in a bathroom. Well, I could, but

the flannel was top of both our minds for some reason. That is just bizarre. That is random. Here's another bulletin where producer Juliet tells us about the pubescent TikTok stars. Welcome to Spy. Thank you. So David Beckham is in talks with Netflix and Amazon to make a new film about his life. So he watched the Michael Jordan miniseries The Last Dance and was like, I want to do that for my life. So he watched the Michael Jordan miniseries The Last Dance and was like

I want to do that for my life. So there's progress on the film being made and what they would sort of include would be obviously his whole career a little bit of his personal life as well and that'd be good. I would be really keen to watch that. I watched that Michael Jordan documentary and thought exactly the same

thing and I released a very bleak movie of my life. It documents my hair loss from age 20 to now and so many sad moments, just crying alone in my car so if you want to watch that, that's out now on Netflix. I actually emceed something like I was talking on stage

at a function that David Beckham was here in New Zealand. Really? And we'd done for a TV show a couple of years ago, we did a little skit where he'd arrived in the country and we'd folded up a piece of paper for his signature at the airport and then when you unfolded it, it was actually like a silly little contract. Right. And I got to read it out in front

of him, what he'd actually signed, play the video, and it was all those things like he's giving me all his money basically afterwards. And then it was like, and I also say I've got a silly voice as well. And everyone went because he was in the room. As if that was the worst thing you could say to him. I was like, oh my God, was that really? I was like, and I also say, I've got a silly voice as well. And everyone went, because he was in the room. As if that was the worst thing you could say to him. I was like, oh my God, was that really?

He was like, surely he knows his voice sounds a little bit silly. And was he offended? No, he just had laughs. He looked good. I didn't even actually meet him or talk to him because I was on stage. Oh, you just abused him. Just a classic healy thing. Everyone was like, and I was like, oh my God, was that the worst thing I could ever say?

That's so good. Wow, claim to fame. Yeah, well, not really. Roasted David Beckham on stage. Yeah, didn't mean to roast him. I think he took it well. Good, good. You didn't see him crying out the bank.

He's never been back to New Zealand since. That'll be in his documentary. Yeah, for sure. And Chris Hemsworth, he is building, just casually, a huge horse stable and horse riding arena on his property in Byron Bay for his wife. So they finished building their mansion in Byron Bay last year, but then he's just gone and purchased himself another one around the corner just for horse riding. So that's home or away he's doing there.

I like how your mind works. Both. Did you see him come back for a cameo on Home and Away? No. Yeah, no, he was just like sitting in the diner in the back of a scene

just sitting at a table. Yeah, like eating like Eggs Benedict or something. Chris Hemsworth. Yeah, he didn't say anything. No dialogue. How good.

Most expensive cameo in history. Yeah, for sure. Or maybe he was just there on the set that day and went, oh, you know, it'll be funny

and they were like, here you go. Swing back to Summer Bay? Yeah. Oh, my goodness. He needs to get back out and start doing more movies. Now his days are filled up with building a horse racing course. I know.

That's when he's got too much time and money on his hands. Yeah, that's true. Exactly. And his new mate, Zac Efron, might be neighbouring with him in Byron Bay. Might be the whole bloody A-list celebs over there now. You know, when you're horse riding you get quite thawed don't you at the end of the day? Did you just spend that time googling it?

No I was trying to think of a joke to combat Jono's home and away. It took me five minutes before I got there. Put it together in a promo right off the back of Jono's way. Oh we'll sound so tight. We'll sound like Leave out the other bit where we banded away for like five minutes about something. Hold on I've still got something here. Cast your mind back to three and a half minutes ago.

It wasn't hems worth it. Oh, God. Can we be done? No. We're done. We're done. I love your punny jokes. I've retired.

It's end game. Yeah. Brilliant. Oh, that was good. Wow. Any more you want to spit out? No, we're done, Juliette. Okay, cool.

The dads are done, mate. All right, awesome. More spy here to the hitstock.co.nz. Making poor life decisions every morning. It's Jolly and Ben on the hits. We towed Mike Hosking's car from the work garage. We now have it in our possession. So if you need a ride this morning,

we've sent Max out in a chauffeur's uniform to drop some people around. If you want to go to work, you need a ride, 4487 on the text. If you want to drive around with a nervous millennial who has just gotten their learner's licence. A $200,000 car. I don't even want to drive it.

Who knows if you'll get to work? Who knows if you'll have a breakdown on the motorway? Who knows? A mental breakdown. Now, the other day on the show, you were talking about how you gave yourself a nickname at school. Yeah. The Heartbreak Kid. Yeah.

I was branded as that. It was a brand. The Heartbreak Kid and it was mainly off the fact that I had three way calling at the time which was a facility that well they've done quite well at naming it where you could have a three way call and so I would phone up people that were being suspected of two timing on their partners

at school. The others the suspicious one would be on the other line silently, and I would bait them to catch a predator with less offenders, less online offenders. You'd trap them into saying something that they shouldn't do. Entrapment, yeah. And that's why you became, well, you gave yourself that nickname. The Heartbreak Kid. Well, I needed a thing. I couldn't just be Jonathan.

Get the Heartbreak Kid to sort your problem out. I mocked you for that the other day. You did. And I was catching up with my friend, who I hadn't seen for a while. I went to school with him, and he had heard that. He'd heard you talk about the heartbreak kid, and he's like, remember the nickname you tried

to get off the ground for yourself? And I was like, oh. It's hard when, granted, I tried to give my own nickname. It's hard when you launch it. Yes, that's the thing. You can't launch it. It needs to be given to you you I always wanted a cool nickname can I guess what it was?

sticks tripod because of my thin frame that would have been quite good that's probably what people call me you called me that when I had my blonde hair moose knuckle my name is Ben Benjamin I guess Ben is already kind of a nickname of my blonde hair, didn't you? So that almost stuck. Moose knuckle.

Oh, because my name is Ben Benjamin and, you know, there's, I guess Ben is already kind of a nickname anyway. So that kind of sticks. And people call you like Benny boy and stuff like that, which is fine. But I was like-

I call you Benny boy. Do you like it? Yeah, I don't mind. I didn't want it to be condescending. No, I'm happy with that. That's fine. But for a while at school, because we had a sports team

and you got to put your nickname on the back. So I tried to, I tried to take a variation of Ben and I was like, oh, Benjamin Jammin, Jammin, B Jammin, B Jammin. So I was like,

in my head I was like, maybe it's B Jammin or I'll go with Jammin. And he was like, my friend was mocking me for this the other day. You remember when you had Jammin on the back of your top? It was a J-A-M-M-I-N.

I was just M-I-N because of Benjamin, but Jammin', yeah. Jammin'. I see, so it was Jamming with a G. Yeah. But no one ever called you Jamming.

No, but it's like, it's Benjamin, Benjamin. You know when you have to explain a nickname, it's like explaining a joke. You have to over-explain something. If you want to start a nickname, you need to move to a new community

and rock in there and just go, my name's The Sniper. That's what people have called me my whole life. I'm Ace. I'm the big show. The big show. Rhino. We're the big show.

I call you 99.99 for your use of hand sanitiser. That's quite good. Your rampant use of Purell. That's quite good. I'll take that. 99.9. We apologise in advance. It's Jono and Ben on take that. 99.9. We apologise in advance.

It's Jono and Ben on the hits. The A to Z of New Zedland. We've been phoning it in since we started. Metaphorically and literally, haven't we been phoning every town and city in Aotearoa? The A to Z of New Zedland. Today, we're heading to Darfield.

Darfield's a town 35km west of the outskirts of Christchurch. If you like being forgiven for all the horrible things you've done in life, then Darfield has many churches. If you like getting older and complaining about young people, it also has two rest homes. It's a great place for Ben and I because Darfield is a popular lift-off location for hot air ballooning,

and we are full of hot air. Am I right? You're right. There we go. Is that the right spot? Yeah, I think it was the right time. Sorry, I could have had a little more. You sounded a little dead inside.

A little bit, yeah. But it was good enough for me. Oh, good. Let's head through to Darfield. Good morning, Darfield. Is that Wally speaking? Is that Wally? Yes. Wally, it's Jonathan. Is that Wally? Yes.

Wally, it's Jonathan and Benjamin here from the Hits radio station. How are you? Good thanks. How are you? We're calling every town and city in New Zealand, Darfield. Yes. Darfield is next on our list, and you, my friend, are in at number 68, alphabetically speaking. Right, right.

So we're in the top 100, aren't we? Yeah, alphabetically, but you're're in the top In the top 100 then, aren't we? Yeah, alphabetically, but you're still in the top 100 Yes, indeed Why should you be in the top 100 without the alphabet? Because we have The best natural Drinking water in the country Running out of our tap

Oh, okay, that's something to hang your hat on There you go Untreated, natural, and it's crisp and clean. Oh, not full of Campylobacter and other E. coli? Darkfield's probably the one of the few, I think, in the country that we can put our hats off to that one. Oh, so you just steal it straight from the mountains and rivers, do you? Steal it straight off the snow.

Oh, beautiful. No yellow snow, though. No yellow snow, that's not in the water, no. I must come and have a glass of water out of your tap one day, Wally. Well, I tell you what, though, one of the best things you've got is that the Alpine Express skiddles through here at 9 o'clock in the morning so you can get out of your bed and climb onto the train and do the West Coast and back again all in one day.

Oh, nice. Jeez, you're doing a great job for tourism, Darfield, here at the moment. Now, my mother, Annie Pryor, was born in Darfield. Right. Yeah, you didn't hook upryor, was born in Darfield. Right. Yeah, you didn't hook up with her in your younger years, did you? Oh, I might know her. Maybe I'm not going to say. Am I on here?

Yeah, it's probably best not to say on the radio, isn't it? Are you my dad, Wally? Aye, well, I'm not going to give you a clue. Are your ears normal size or do they stick out a bit? Oh, they're sticky out a bit. Yeah, yeah, I've got the sticky out one. Oh, Dad. Hang on, hang on.

What's your hair on your head like, Wally? Receding. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. How's your skin complexion, Wally? Pasty, almost see-through? I'm not certainly a tanner.

Oh, okay. Uh-oh. Oh, listen, Dad, I love you. Okay. He'll see you for a pie and a train trip and a glass of water sometime. Yeah, come on down, son. We'll have a glass of water. All right, Dad.

Bye. Wally, what a good sport. You have a great day, my friend. You too. Thanks, guys. See you, mate. Take care. Bye.

Oh, I love Wally. Well, I should do. He's my dad. He's your dad. See you, mate. Thank you. Bye. Oh, I love Wally. Well, I should do. He's my dad. Like starting your day with Panda Eyes. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. There's a referendum coming up later in the year, in September to be exact, and we like to do our own referendums. All those hours are a bit not quite as important.

Mate, back yourself. Back yourself. This is important. This is probably the most important issue facing the world today. Cats or dogs? Which is better? Ben, you've got both. You've got a foot in both camps.

Yeah. Which one do you love better? Because, I mean, let's be honest. They're like kids. Secretly, you like one better. You just publicly can't go on record and say you do. But it depends what you want them for is the thing. And that's the point.

You know, like, a cat is awesome in so many ways, and so is a dog. Yeah. I mean, a cat, if you want a thing with a tail that's the, you know, like a cat is awesome in so many ways and so is a dog. Yeah. I mean, a cat, if you want a thing with a tail that hates you, then a cat is the perfect animal. It doesn't always hate you. That's the thing. But it does, it sort of likes you on their terms, you know? Like the cat, you know, like the cat was super cuddly when it wants to be fed and super, you know?

And it's great when you're going away and it's a little easier to manage. So in the human to cat relationship, do you feel like you're giving more to the relationship and the cat is giving you less? It's all like the cat is dictating. Oh, maybe more than the dog. More than the dog. But you get a lot of love and affection out of the cat.

But dogs can be a little too needy, can't they? But, oh, here I am. But they are super excited to see you when you come home and to do stuff with them. That being said, put your foot in a camp. Put both feet in a camp. Don't sit on the fence. Can't have a referendum and sit on the fence.

What are you going to go for? I'm going to say dogs. I'm going to say dogs are better because they like you more. Well, that's a good reason. Plus, I'm allergic to cats. It's not a joke. I'm allergic to cats. That's another good reason. It's not a joke. I'm allergic to a lot of stuff.

Very sensitive individual. I get rather rashy, Juliet, when near a cat. Oh, okay. They excrete a certain type of oil in their fur. I'm a pretty unhealthy, sick human being. I've got two weeks to live. This is not a GP appointment, mate. This is a referendum. I'll wait 100. Let live. This is not a GP appointment, mate. This is a referendum.

0800, let's try and settle this because I can't decide. 4487 on the text. Why do we need to decide what's better, dogs or cats? Dogs or cats, your thoughts. 0800, that's the number, 4487. This is the referendum.

Votes flowing in here on the text machine, 24487. Dogs are way better. My dog went missing yesterday and my first thought was why couldn't the cat go missing instead? Rico's on the phone from Auckland. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast, Rico.

Dogs and cats. Which is your favourite? The referendum. Hi. I'd go for cats because there's less work with them. You just have to feed them, open the door, and let them out, and then that's pretty much it for you. Less administration.

They look after themselves. Yeah, they do. You know, a cat that comes and cosies up to you and comforts you creeps me out. It's like, is this thing about to pounce on me? Oh, really? Unsettles me. No, well, you get used to it.

It's actually really nice. Now, Ben, are you going to pick one before the end of this? You know you need to. Dogs or cats? I'm torn. I'm torn. You know the dogs and cats can't understand this. I know,

but I have a dog and a cat and I love them both. And it depends what you're looking for in an animal. From the outside looking in, do you mind if I chime in here? Yeah. I'm going to say you like

the dog better. Why? Because you give it more attention. It travels around in the car with you. Well, see, I can't bring the cat to work. You bring it to work. Is it weird if you bring

a cat to work? I'm thinking so. See, cats are just weird. You can have multiple dogs and no one considers you a crazy dog person. Multiple cats, all of a sudden you're branded, aren't you? Yeah. Stereotypes. Yeah, right.

Phil's in Christchurch. Dogs and cats, the referendum. What are your thoughts, Phil? And those are lovely thoughts. Yeah, touching words. Speaking on behalf of New Zealand there. Nice one, Phil. Mo is on the phone from South Auckland.

Welcome, Mo. Hi. Who are you voting for, dogs or cats, the referendum? Dogs so far. Yeah, dogs. You own a dog? I own a dog and a cat. Oh, and you're picking.

See, she's picking one. Mo's picking one. You can't pick one. Mo can. Hey, good on you, Mo. You have a lovely day. We want to settle this. Yeah, because I couldn't settle it. I couldn't decide. No, I know. You have a lovely day. We want to settle this. Yeah, because I couldn't settle it.

I couldn't decide. No, no. An indecisive. You know you're meant to put your foot in a camp on radio, mate. I know. It's a tough one. So we're going to go through to Dairy Flat Vet. We actually spoke to these people yesterday as part of the A to Z of New Zealand calling

every town in Aotearoa. We spoke to Georgia. We'll call her back and see what her thoughts are. The official word from the vet. Good morning, D Flatbeds. Lisa speaking. Oh, hi Lisa. Is Georgia there please? Georgia's left I'm afraid. Oh, she's left. We literally

just phoned her two days ago. Yeah, her last day was on, well it's going to be next Saturday actually. This coming Saturday. Oh, okay. Well, Miss Georgia, she'll live on forever in our hearts. Yeah. She never mentioned anything to us

since she was leaving. Look, it's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits radio station. Oh, hi. Did she mention we had spoken? She did, actually.

Yeah. We sort of laughed at her. No, we did. We rang her once randomly to talk about Dairy Flat. Oh, okay. And Lisa,

your name, is it? Yeah. Lisa, well, you sound like a lovely person. Oh, thanks. If you don't name is it? Yep. Lisa, well, you sound like a lovely person. Oh, thanks. If you don't mind me saying you sound even better than Georgia. Oh, I wouldn't go that far. You sound on the same level as

Georgia. Oh, cheers. We had a question that we're having a big debate what's better, dogs or cats? You know, people love either or. I've got a cat and a dog, so I've got a kind of foot in both camps. But we thought maybe as a vet working at the vet clinic, you might have an answer for us.

Oh, I'm going horses, sorry. Oh, she's throwing in horses to the mix. Why horses? I don't know. I've just worked with them forever. But, yeah, I don't know. Dogs or cats, we love them all, really. Horses are too big.

Too big. If you're like, okay, Lisa, you're only allowed one pet. It can either be a cat or a dog. Horses aren't in this, by the way. This hypothetical situation. What are you going? Oh, probably my dog. Yeah. I do love my dog.

He's my bestie. Oh, that's the thing. But then I've got two cats as well. You've come around again, haven't you? You've gone 50-50. Ben, you mentioned earlier, it depends what you're after. Because cats look around again, haven't you? You've gone 50-50. It depends. Well, Ben, you mentioned earlier, it depends what you're after. Because cats look after themselves, don't they?

They're like flatmates. Yeah, pretty much. Flatmates who hate you. To a degree. To a degree. You can go away for the weekend and leave them a whole lot of bickies, but you can't really do that with a dog. No, yeah, dogs, yeah, they depend on you a bit more, which is good and bad, right?

You know? Right. Yeah, absolutely. But I don't know. Working at a vet clinic, we might be the wrong people to ask because we kind of love everything. Oh, you're one and bad, right? Right, yeah, absolutely. But I don't know, working at a vet clinic, we might be the wrong people to ask because we kind of love everything. Oh, you're one of those, are you? Let's love everything people.

You gave us horses. We didn't have horses as part of this debate, but there we go. We'll say the best animal to get is a horse. Hey, good on you. Okay. You go and look after yourself, Lise. Cheers, guys. We'll call you for any future vet-related topics. You do that. You do that. See you later. Okay. You go and look after yourself, Lise. Cheers, guys. We'll call you for any future vet-related topics. You do that.

You do that. See you later. Okay, bye. I don't know if we settled that debate. No. I think we can all agree some people like cats and some people like dogs. And maybe the last seven minutes of radio was irrelevant and pointless. Bit of a waste of time, wasn't it?

That's for our boss to decide in our post-show meeting. And he'll say the same thing. Lou in calories and Lou in laughs. And he'll say the same thing. Lou in calories and Lou in laughs. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Okay, Mike Hosking we've managed to acquire his fancy Jaguar. We towed it from the car park this time last week. That was a week ago, wasn't it?

Yeah. Yeah, remarkable. Remarkable little weeks flying by. And we've had a lot of fun with it so far. Should we have an audio recap? Yeah, okay. Should we do that? Yeah, let's do that, Juju.

We are down at the garage here at NZME. Super City Towing here. The Jaguar is up. See you later, guys. There we go. It's happening. And we're taking it. We replaced his car with a red Labour car.

So you stole my car. It's mine. Everyone's happy. We forgot to get the keys. You want me now to give you the key to my car? We've got the keys. We've got the car. And I've got a little event.

Jono had the car and he took it to the drags and now, we're in the heart of Bougainville and we're about to take this car out on the quarter mile. If I know Mike Hosking like I do, he would just love this right now. And that was 13 seconds. Oh, no. Juliet, that's not the dragway audio. That's me making love on Saturday night.

So we've got the car, the Jaguar I-Pace, and this morning we thought we'd give some rides to people. But don't forget, if you want to live like Mike, you can register at thehitstockco.nz and we've put together a package for you to have the car over a weekend. The all-electric Jaguar I-Pace, two nights luxury accommodation in Matakana, dinner for two at Chibo, which is Mike Hosking's favourite restaurant, a set of loafers, fancy loafers like Mike would wear,

and a Dyson Cordless vacuum cleaner as well. All that could be yours. The hit stock, I don't know, Zed. You can suck like Mike sucks his vacuum cleaner over his car. He cleans that thing every day, and we've kept it clean. We have. We've respected it. But this morning, our shaky millennial producer, Max,

is out there dressed as a chauffeur. Well, come on in, Max. Hello. Listening to nothing but Newstalk ZB this morning, I hope, Max. Well, actually, sorry. I had the hits on. I'll have to talk to Mike later. Awesome.

What's going on in the car? Who have you picked up? I've picked up... He's picked up an entire kindergarten. What's going on? We are sitting in the car. We're about to head off to Kindy, and they'll take Jackie to work in the city.

Okay, who's in the car? You've got Jackie and how many children? Two. Two kids. Jackie and both your kids are in the car right now. Might I say for this Uber ride, there's no soilage fee. If anything, extra points if you soil. I know. I mean, extra points if you soil. I know.

I mean, thank God for the seed. There's quite a soundtrack going on. It's quite noisy, but that's all right. I'm sure Mike would love this. There's a couple of kids and their mum getting a ride to kindergarten and work. Hey, kids, you might want to have your breakfast in the car. Yeah. Did you have your breakfast in the car. Yeah. Did you have your breakfast in the car?

Okay, that went down like a cup of sake. It was just a suggestion. I was just spitballing. Bad idea, Jono. Shocking idea. I'm sorry. I'll see myself out. Max, drive safely.

We'll catch up with you later on in the show. Sweet. Sounds good. Thanks, Jack. Hey, Jackie, safe ride. Have a good day at school, kids. Thank you. Thanks, Jack. Hey, Jackie, safe ride. Have a good day at school, kids. Thank you, thanks, guys. Bye, see you later.

And if you'd like a lift with Max, what can they do, Ben boys? 4-4-8-7 is our text, Sam. We might line you up a ride after 8 o'clock on the hits. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. Buy the WhatsApp by doco.nz Anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. Spy. Know what's up.

Spy.co.nz All right. Producer Juliet is in for another spy update. The forecast in her day is always for a downpour of celebrity gossip. She's drenched in it. What have we got? So, Andrew Lloyd Webber, he is the composer of the Cats musical, didn't like the movie remake either, apparently.

Oh, really? Oh, this was James Corden and Jason Derulo and... Yeah, Taylor Swift, Rebel Wilson. It was a massive cast, right? Star-studded cast. He said it was absolutely ridiculous. The whole problem with the film was that Tom Hooper, who was the director, decided that he didn't want anybody involved with the movie who was involved in the original show,

and that the whole thing was just absolutely ridiculous and that he does not approve. So I don't know if that's ever happened with any other remakes in the original actually not liking the remake or if they've actually come out and said it. I never saw it. All I know is that it just got terrible reviews. It sounded like it was more detrimental to cats

than when Gareth Morgan was trying to cull them all about four years ago last election. Yeah, true. Yeah, it's weird that they weren't, you know, to get the rights. They didn't have to involve the original people.

Yeah, that's true. And you'd think it'd be quite a good, well, I haven't actually seen it either, but you'd think it'd be quite good considering the lineup

of stars that they had in the movie. Yeah, I mean, well, it just goes to prove you can't get the world's most famous people and slap them in a cat, a lycra cat costume and hope for the best. Yeah, I mean, well, it just goes to prove you can't get the world's most famous people and slap them in a cat, lycra cat costume

and hope for the best. Yeah, true. Quite, what's the word? The tights were quite... Revealing? Yes. Yeah, that's the word. You could see everything,

couldn't you? Yeah, there was nothing hidden there. Yeah, it was very bizarre costumes that they had on. So Ben, you had something else you wanted to add in there? They needed to neuter

a few of the male cats. Oh, gosh. Just so you didn't have to, you had something else you wanted to add in there? They needed to neuter a few of the male cats. Just so you didn't have to, you know. You thought they would like pixelate them out or CGI them out or something? Maybe not. Anyway. Maybe that's where it all went down. Exactly. And Donald Trump, he told reporters recently that the US will ban TikTok following the privacy concerns with the Chinese government having all of the information of all of the users.

But now he's retracted that comment and has given the go-ahead for Microsoft to potentially buy it. So it could be a Microsoft-owned platform soon. Because they're worried about the security, aren't they? Yes, pretty much. They don't want the Chinese government to have access to all of Americans and, I guess, worldwide. And you raised an interesting point the other day.

It's not actually owned by the Chinese government. It's owned by a Chinese company, but in China, being a communist state, that the government has access, don't they, to all companies' information? If they want it at any stage, without any question. I don't know why they would want

the information of every TikTok user. I guess it's just that potential there that at any stage, go, I've got all your details and you know where you live and all those things. Because you know, you've got to enter your age

and all those things in when you start up an account. No one reads the T's and C's. Who wants to read the niggly 500 pages of T's and C's? Yeah, but there's a lot of things on social media saying how America good points, America are looking at banning this, but there's a whole lot of other stuff that they

could be banning earlier. Like guns? Yeah, looking into things like that. Why TikTok? So TikTok's the big thing at the moment. You've taken your kids off it. I have, yeah. And the kids even knew yesterday. One of my daughters came home and she was like,

oh, yeah, Microsoft is buying TikTok. Good time to invest in Microsoft, Dan. I was like, oh, yeah, obviously they've been talking about it at school. And she's like, would that be better security? And I was like, oh, I would imagine so. But yeah, we'll look at it because they know that we haven't got them on there because of security reasons. Now, I doubt you do regret me banning you from TikTok.

Oh, no. Remember I made you delete the app? I made you cancel your account? Yeah, yeah. I did that for other reasons. Not for your safety concern. For my own security. More credibility reasons.

For insecurity reasons. That was really quite insecure. Thank you, producer Juliet. Lovely stuff. Wake up full of shame. Wake up with these guys. It's Jono and Van on the heads. Great to have you with us this morning on New Zealand's Breakfast.

Mike Hosking's car, we've obtained that. And it's a Jaguar. It's a fancy Jaguar. And you can borrow it. Right now, Max from the show is driving around the streets of New Zealand. If you need a lift anywhere, just text 4487. We spoke to him not but 40 minutes ago in a car crowded with messy children

and a stressed out mother on her way to work. He had a mum to drop off at work, kids at kindergarten. So that's what you can get at 4487 this morning. Okay. I am in crippling debt, Ben Boyce, and I know that we spend a lot of time with each other. Yeah. You don't know this about me. I know, I don't. I have a dark side. What's going on? A dark side that

involves an illegal gambling ring. This is not sanctioned by the New Zealand government, this gambling ring. During lockdown, I started betting my son Oscar that he couldn't do stuff for financial gain. That's all the entertainment I had. He's like, bet you can't jump off that roof, give you five bucks, sort of thing. No, I never made him do that. That would be shocking. But there was a swing. We've got a swing

that hangs off a bar. And this is where it started. I was like, I'll give you ten bucks if you kick that ball, the football, through the swing. So, you know, between the chains. Oh yeah, gotcha. He got it. Yeah, he landed it. And I was like, well, I didn't expect that.

And then I was like, okay, double or nothing. $20, but you can't do it again. He went and did it twice. So since then, it has just been a slippery slope of me betting he can't do stuff and him inevitably ending up doing it. I now owe him $226. No way. Yeah, it's because I keep making the stakes higher and higher,

thinking that I'm going to win it back. So it now goes over to the basketball court. I bet you can't land this three-point shot, and he gets it. Oh, my goodness. And I'm like, I'll give you 50 more bucks if you don't get it. You give me you. You take $100 off my debt. And it's getting to the point where he's got an air of like a mafioso hitman

who knows I owe him something. And the joy is he doesn't even want the money, but he likes having something over me. Wow, he's really cracked up. You're really quite deep, aren't you? I'm in deep. I can't get out of this. I don't know how I'm going to get out of this.

You have to pay up the money. I've been paying for him to live for nine or ten years. Does that not count? That goes out the window, doesn't it? Technically, you've had another agreement on top of this. You've created this whole situation. I can see how people get in strife at the casino. Oh, yeah.

Because you're just trying to claw your way back, aren't you? You double down, you get into a hole, and you go, maybe if I just get out of this, and you get more of a hole, and oh, God. Listen, he knows I'm good for it. He knows I'm good for it. One day, I'll pay dividends. In the meantime, Ben, can I borrow $226?

You know I'm good for it. I'll pay you back with interest. It's fine. It's fine. Everything's fine. Just don't tell the wife, eh? Okay, mate? Just between you and me. I hope she doesn't listen to this radio show. Yeah, no one does. Start your day the wrong way.

It's Jono and Ben, all my heads. We've taken Mike Hosking's car. We towed it from the work garage. He works at Newstalk ZB in the same building. And now while we've borrowed it, we want to have some fun with it while we've got it for a short time. And I want to say to Mike,

thank you for being so accommodating. Yeah, he gave us the keys in the end, didn't he? Yeah, what a lovely guy. Well, thankfully he's got 39 other cars valued at $200,000 that he can drive. Backup cars. Everyone needs a few backup cars. But at the moment,

Max from the show is in Mike Hosking's Jaguar, which you can borrow for whatever you want. Someone texted in 4487, I want to go up the Kaimai's 4x4 track this weekend. Oh, okay. Which might be a lovely little journey for the I-Pace Jaguar to go on. But Max from the show, you're out and about transporting people, ferrying people to and from work.

How's it been going this morning, Maxie? Oh, the Auckland traffic has just been wonderful this morning. I've really just got some wonderful drivers in the city. Hey, mate, don't get on here and be all passive-aggressive about other motorists. Ring Newstalk ZB if you want to have a moan about traffic. We've got some positive stuff in the morning. Ironically, the only station you can listen to in Mike's car is Mike Hosking Breakfast on repeat.

You sound like a boomer. All right. We spoke to you an hour ago. You were ferrying Jackie and her kids on the way to kindergarten and then dropping Jackie at work. Who's in the car now? I've got Olivia. How are you, Olivia?

Good, thank you. How are you guys? Good. Where are you heading to today? Just up to Commercial Bay, actually. Oh, okay. Yeah, a fancy part of town. Yes, it is.

We've just moved into a flash new office. It's a very expensive car, that. Like, it's more expensive than all of our lives put together. What I wouldn't give to be run over by that vehicle. It would be an honour. So, has Max been looking after it? Yes, he has. He has.

I was going to have my protein shake in it this morning, actually. But I decided I'll wait till I get to work. But it's a very flash car. Mike likes protein. You can have protein. I'm sure it'll be fine. Yeah, he's always saying public transport is shocking. Inadvertently, Mike is now helping out public

transport. Yeah, that's true. With carpooling. Hey, well, good on you. You have a wonderful day and thank you for going for a ride in the Jaguar. If you could sum it up in three words, what would those words be? Very slick, sophisticated and a very smooth ride.

Five or six words there. That's fine, I don't mind. You went over the three word limit, but that's great. They were great words and you have a lovely day. Thank you. You too. See you, matey. And if you want to live like Mike, we've put together a pretty cool price pack involving Mike Hosking's brand new Jaguar I-Pace that we've got. We've put this whole pack together, not sanctioned

by Mike Hosking, but what the heck. You win the car for a week in the Jaguar I-Pace. You get two nights luxury accommodation at Matakana. You get dinner for two at Chibo, which is a fancy restaurant in Parnell. A new set of loafers, just like Mike would wear, and a Dyson cordless vacuum because he loves cleaning. He loves cleaning, Mike Hosking. So if you want to win all that, which is actually a pretty amazing prize pack.

Yep, you'll be a better class of person in the space of a weekend. You can go to the hitstockco.nz, live like Mike, and borrow Mike Hosking's Sprang Your Jaguar iPace for a week. Like starting your day without your morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. We want to give away something right now, but we thought the catch is we call you, you don't call us. Yeah, and it's called conveniently,

Don't Call Us, We'll Call You. We force it upon you unnecessarily like the tap. Oh, listen to that. What just happened there? What is that? I think Satan's coming out of me. Yeah. I've been possessed.

Wow. An exorcism after seven o'clock here on the show, but let's go through and play this wonderful game. Morning, Sue speaking. Oh, she's here. Sue's here. She's happy. We're all happy.

Hit the music, Sue. Hello? Hello, Sue? Sue! Sue! Hi. Hi, it's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits radio station. Oh, hi.

How are you, Sue? You were very confused, weren't you? I am. It's a game show. It's called Don't Call Us, We'll Call You. You didn't call us, we're calling you. That's how it works. Okay. And we ask you some questions, Sue.

You answer them and guess what we give you at the end? What? Wonderful cuddle. No, no cuddle. Virtual cuddle. Virtual cuddle. And $40 worth of hell pizza. Oh, perfect.

Yeah, so here you go, the quick questions. Here we go, we'll roll into it. Which artist posted a remarkable photo of themselves over the weekend looking like a completely different person? Was it A, Kanye West, B, Adele, or C, Chris Martin? Adele. Well done. Did you see Adele?

No. Oh, you just guessed her. Her face looks completely different, doesn't it? Next question. Elon Musk owns which company? A, Tesla, B, Sessler, or C, Kessler? Tesla. Oh, you are on fire.

Two for two, right on. Stop, drop, and roll, Sue. They say you just can't beat the Mad Butchers. What? A, table tennis skills, B, hospitality, or C, meat? Meat. Yeah. Three from three, Sue. Yeah.

Yeah. And Sue has been as cool as a cucumber all through this, haven't you, Sue? I have. Finally, Mike McRoberts reads the what? A, reads the room well. B, reads the news or reads the classifieds daily? The news. Oh, Sue.

There you go, Sue. Four from four, just like that. For picking up the phone, you get some hell pizza. Oh, thank you. Yeah, what sort of pizza are you going to put in your mouth there, Sue? Not sure yet. Yeah, you're like a meat lovers, you're like a cheesy number. What are you after?

They do plant-based Toretto these days too, so it's like a non-meat. Oh, no, not that one. Okay, no, not that one. She doesn't know what she wants, but she knows she definitely doesn't want that. All right, fair enough. Knock it till you try it. Well, she's knocking. Sue's knocking.

Yes, she's knocking. I love your work, Sue. Thank you. You hold the line. We'll find you, get your details. Okay, thanks. All right, thanks, mate. We'll send you out that plant-based chorizo pizza.

Not a morning person? Sadly, neither of these two. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. It's growing through your veins. Yeah, these are the news stories that are broken overnight

and we have tirelessly copied and pasted them onto our shared Google document. That's right. And Helen Clark, our former Prime Minister of New Zealand,

she's told off Elon Musk, of course, the SpaceX and Tesla CEO. He's got a few, you know, controversial opinions from time to time. And so on Twitter yesterday, he went, aliens built the pyramids of, obviously. Oh, it's an obviously, yeah.

I mean, what else would they have done? So that was his tweet. It was reposted more than 86,000 times. He's got a big audience. Yeah. And what did Aunty Helen tell him off like a mum? Yeah, she said, if this is meant as a joke, it isn't funny.

And he says, oh, wow, good on you, Helen. That's great. I love it. He wouldn't even have seen that. But it's making news in New Zealand. Yeah, there's big stuff here. If he's got 86,000 people liking that post, Aunty Helen's got lost in the bunch.

She went in there, you know, and she made a good point. Egyptians are rightly proud Of their extraordinary heritage And this isn't funny Well when you look When you think about the pyramids And the heavy lifting

The literal heavy lifting That would have gone into Making those things Yeah Imagine how long it took I know It would have been years Yeah

One by one Painstakingly And then we're talking about Hundreds and hundreds And hundreds of years ago Right too So you know It's phenomenal Well they put Well done those Egyptians Yeah They did some stuff Good on you guys One by one, painstakingly. And then we're talking about hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years ago, right, too. That's phenomenal.

Well, they put well down those Egyptians. They did some stuff. Good on you guys. Remember, Helen Clark Facebooked us, didn't she? That's right. We went to New York for some work, and it was just you and I, and we took a photo outside the UN. This is when she was working at the United Nations,

and I think we tagged her in it and saying, you know, here for a cup of tea with Auntie Helen or something, and she went, lol. She was replied saying, you know, here for a cup of tea with Aunty Helen or something. And she went, lol. She was replied with lol. Never met us for a cup of tea. Lol. As if I would meet you two schmucks. I love it. Anyway, lovely lady. Do you know my friend lived across the road from her? I don't know if he still does. Robert. Yeah. And he said while

she was Prime Minister, he said, amazing. They've just got 24 hour security on the street. Oh yeah, yeah. Just diplomatic security on the street. Oh, yeah, yeah. Just diplomatic protection on the street. Well, yeah, you imagine it wouldn't be the case. He would go out and have drinks with them. They wouldn't drink, obviously. Yeah.

But he would stand there and... He'd be the guy punishing them with a chat. Yeah, after six beers, spouting off the security. And also making news over the last 24 hours, a man in Britain, so a little while ago, he had basically an infection, and that meant that he lost his male part.

Oh, I love, is this the one where you say they're going to grow one on his arm? Yes. Oh. Yes, this is happening now. He can see the funny side of it. This guy here, so we're not mocking him or anything like that. So he's come out and said, yeah, I can see the funny side. I've got four years he's got to carry around

on his arm. How does he put his shirt on? I don't know. He says, yeah, everyone has a bit of a laugh about it, but he said the good thing

is they gave him an extra couple of inches as well. So he requested that as well. Why can't they just grow it where it's meant to be? So for four years

he's got to, and then they'll take, once it's grown, they'll put it back on. Better than on his head, I guess. It would have been funnier on his head though because then he'd be a literal one. So he had to see a professional and he once it's grown, they'll put it back on. Better than on his head, I guess. It would have been funnier on his head, though,

because then he'd be a literal one. So he had to see a professional, and he says it's a miracle, and he's got a new start, so he's pretty happy. Does it have the same reactions on his arm? You know. You're like, what? I'm an old mate. Can't even walk through the door.

So there you go. So, yeah, what an age we live in. What an age you live in. It's pretty amazing that you can lose that and still you grow it back on your arm and away you go. Just a less public location would have been better though. Yeah, but I mean... Five? Yeah.

Why the arm? I don't know. I don't know. I'm not a doctor, but this guy is, yeah, he's pretty stoked and he's happy to tell the world that this is happening. So that's cool. Belly button? Yeah, well, okay. There's some great options.

You're telling me these things. I'm not the doctor. And that is what is making news this morning. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Our show almost at the end. We like to end on a positive note, though.

Hey, feeling good? Yeah, it's going to be a good day. You need to call us on 0800THEHITS. This is your job. We've done some heavy lifting this morning. You can drag us over the finish line today. And you just tell us what's going to be a good day. It can be as big or as small as you want.

It's like a well-trained orchestra. We like to end on a good note. Welcome from Whata Whata. Glenda, welcome. Hi. Why is it going to be a good day, Glendo? It's going to be a fantastic day, not just a good day. Okay, you're priming up for a big one.

I work in the care industry and I'm off to my wonderful job. I have the pleasure of looking after rest time care people and hospital care people. We have fun, We do activities. And it's just awesome. And I give fantastic hugs. Oh, Glenda. Wow. I'm already having a good day just listening to you talk about your good day.

We're going to send you a double pass to Reading Cinemas. Thank you so much for being so positive, so bubbly, and for calling the show. This reminds me of Ellen during her fun and positive years and the less workplace bullish years. Yeah, true. All our dark stuff's about to come out in a couple of months. Lucy and Abindel, welcome. Oh, sorry, Liana and Te Araha, welcome.

Yeah, hi. It's going to be a great day today because the sun is shining and, you know, it's not foggy. Oh, that's so positive. We base a lot of our mood around the weather, don't we? Yeah, pretty much. Especially in Te Araha because it's always foggy and stuff. Double pass to the movies.

Reading Cinema's coming your way. You have a great day. Thank you so much for listening. Okay, thank you very much. God bless you, Liana. God bless you. Don't forget you can check out the podcast on iHeartRadio. We'll be back tomorrow from six.

Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from six on the hits and via the iHeartRadio app.