Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - August 28 - We Celebrate 100 Shows On The Hits, Ben's Awkward Encounter With A Mate, Judith Collins

Episode Date: August 27, 2020

Kia Ora! On today's show we heard about some of your funeral faux pas stories. This came after a woman had officially been declared dead, but at the funeral home they found her to still be alive! Jono also shared a story about how his wife got offended by an observation he made about her clothing. We also talked to Silver Fern Laura Langman who has now retired, and we caught up with Judith Collins.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings, friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Ben boys, here we are, end of the week. What an occasion and what a very special end to this week. It was. Are you smiling and waving at us?

Oh, just a little while. Tony Street. Oh, I just see Tony Street. Bye, Tony Street. Wave at you in the window. Yeah, okay. So 100 shows. That's what we've done.

Breakfast shows. Yeah. This is the 100th podcast for the breakfast show. We've done the ISO Luncheon as well, which was RIP ISO Luncheon. What a great show we ran for a few weeks during lockdown. Yeah, New Zealand doesn't have a great history of celebrating 100s.

So just a couple of weeks ago, we celebrated 100 COVID-free days. Oh, yeah, true. And that's, well, we all know how that's turned out. Yeah, okay. Yeah, so maybe should we be celebrating? Well, we have done it. Oh, yeah.

Oh, this is retrospective, isn't it? Yeah. So we shouldn't have. No. You could have brought that up before we. It's a good spell disaster for the program. All right. Well, anyway, we did celebrate 100 shows with $100 to give away.

We stretched that over the hour, with $100 to give away. We stretched that over the hour, giving that away to various people. As well as that, we had Silver Fern legend Laura Langman with the most stressful

phone call we've ever had. Wop, wop, wop, wop, wop. Langman style. Because we only had three minutes to talk to her. It was like a phone system that she didn't set it up.

It was set up through the people that organized the thing and you're like, you've got three minutes, go. And it just abruptly cut off. I think it was set up by practising Satanists. I don't know who would do this to us.

It was so stressful. All I could think about was the clock ticking again. I wasn't concentrating on what she was saying. I was like, ask her a question. I'd be like, be quick, answer quick. Get to the point, get to the point. Yeah. So that's on the show today.

As well as that, we talk office politics with National Party leader Judith Collins you know like should you cover food in a microwave can you park in the boss's car park can you reheat fish from a meal

the night before being hoarse which I know is a funny but you're like sorry guys I've got a stinky lunch I can move out and then we're all like

no you're going to stay here and you eat it anyway I thought it was okay because it's kind of locked down at the moment you know there's hardly anyone in the building it's still stained the walls I can still taste it in my mouth kind of locked down at the moment. You know, there's hardly anyone in the building. It's still stained the walls.

I can still taste it in my mouth. Well, that's all on the podcast today. Enjoy. Have a great podcast experience. Is that what you say? More painful than your alarm clock. It's Jotterwood Band on the hits. I caused huge offence in the household yesterday when I got home.

Did you? Jim, my lovely wife, is at home. Just getting home for you, getting home. Oh, God, he's back again. Oh, the marriage must still be on. Yeah, I thought he was gone. I woke up this morning, he was gone. I thought, yes.

He's back. Sometimes I have to just call her to check the marriage is still on. You know, we're still going. We're still doing this for another 12 months. She's like, yeah, I'll give you another year. Well, I had the thing yesterday on the show. We're doing the show out of the house and I was talking about Amanda putting salt

without even tasting a meal that I cooked and she was right next to me. I was like, this is not the time to be. But you couldn't back out because you prepped this radio break? It was in there. It was in there. But I hadn't factored in

that I was going to be doing it in the environment with her. I'd just be callously hoping I'd be doing it without her hearing it. Where we left you yesterday, the marriage was in tatters. After 8 o'clock today, things are not good. Well, I slept in the car

last night. That's after 8 o'clock. But no, I got home yesterday and Jean, she looked fantastic in a new pair of jeans. Okay, fantastic. And I was like, oh, you've got mum jeans on. You know, all the rage. High-waisted sort of mum. Oh, they're mum jeans. They're not mum jeans on. You know, all the rage. The high-waisted sort of mum.

Oh, they're mum jeans. They're not mum jeans. These are boyfriend jeans. What's the difference between mum jeans and boyfriend jeans? I almost offended her saying mum jeans because they were boyfriend jeans. And I was like, well, excuse me for, you know, the denim wrapped around a mum's legs being referred to as mum jeans, like technically speaking.

So she's looking for her boyfriend jeans? Why are they called boyfriend jeans? I mean, why are they called boyfriend jeans? Did you get to the bottom of that? No, no, I didn't quite figure that out. Maybe they were her boyfriend's jeans. Maybe this is all making a lot of sense. Maybe boyfriend jeans aren't a thing.

Yeah. No, these are my boyfriend's jeans. Is it offensive to tell a mum she's wearing mum jeans? I don't know. Juliet, your thoughts? Oh. Well, she is a mum. Yeah.

But also being called a mum, I don't know. I mean, yeah. There's also girlfriend jeans are a thing as well. Yeah, but you wear mum jeans. I do. Is this like for the guys out there who yearn for a girl who has the sexy legs of their mother? Sometimes if I'm wearing my mum jeans and I actually am talking to mum, mum's like, why aren't you wearing skinny jeans? You know, wear tight pants when you can pull it off.

Oh, really? Yeah. Would you get offended, though, if we said, oh, you're wearing mum jeans? No. As someone who's not a mum? No. So it's okay for a mum to wear girlfriend jeans and it's okay for a girlfriend to wear mum jeans. I'm getting this now.

I find also the one that got me for a while with having kids was don't say babysitting. Like, oh, yeah, I can't come out tonight. I'm babysitting. It's parenting. It's parenting. Because for a while you're like, oh, no, I'm babysitting. I can't come out tonight.

And Amanda will be like, it's parenting? You're like, oh, I can't think of the same thing. Mate, you're already, the marriage is already, why are you doubling down? Sorry. What are you doing? But she looked wonderful when she said it. Like an angel.

She looked wonderful in her mum jeans. Girlfriend jeans. Yeah, girlfriend jeans, sorry. And if you want Ben jeans, they fit all boys aged five to eight years old. Not a morning person? Sadly, neither of these two. It's Jono and Ben on the hits.

Now, I was talking to my mate last night on the phone. Now, he's the handy guy I was telling you about The other day He came over to help Before lockdown He helped out with some jobs Outside that I can't do He's one of those

Sort of One of those guys That can do that stuff What are the jobs That you can't do Tell me those Pretty much everything To do with

I remember I came over to your house For a barbecue Yeah And you'd just bought A new barbecue And everyone was Barbecue shaming you

Because they're like Why didn't you get a Weber And you'd just bought a new barbecue and everyone was barbecue shaming you because they're like, why didn't you get a Weber? And you're like, I got a Jumbuck from Bunnings, okay? Yeah. And this Jumbuck will do me well till the end of time or until it rusts to pieces in a month.

Yeah, so my mate came over. I was telling you guys about this the other day and he was doing handy stuff at home that I needed. So I was like, do you want a hand? He's like, well, no, you can't. You're no good to me.

You go do what you need to do inside. So I went inside and I did a bit of a YouTube workout. That's what you can do. That's your wheelhouse. You're like, I can make my body look good. You can go out there and do all my yard work. And I was going to the shower after, hot and sweaty, going to the shower afterwards, just in my undies,

heard a knock at the door. I thought it was my mate because he was outside. Opened the door in my undies, all hot and sweaty. And it was a courier. I told you guys this. It was an awkward moment. But I hadn't told my mate this.

So I was telling him last night. I was like, oh, last time you were over, I had to... I love how you describe yourself all hot and sweaty. As if like, it's like a Mills and Boone novel.

So boys, saunters to the door. Seductively opens it. Temperature-wise, I was hot. Sweaty. Yeah, well, no, I was saying it was temperature-wise I was hot. But I was telling my mate about this because I hadn't told him that it happened when he was over

and he was like, oh, I think I can go one better. So it was about a year ago, he was about to go to work and his boss was going to pick him up on the way to a job. And he was like, well, I'll just go outside and hang out some washing, outside waiting for the boss. And his wife at the time was like, oh, I'll see you later. Have a good day.

She went into the shower. She got a knock. Well, got a knock at the door and thought it was her husband, my mate, coming back inside from taking out the washing. And she was in her lingerie and she opened the door going well hello hello and it was his boss opening the door

going oh my god she was like hello hello was she all hot and sweaty as well she was probably steamy out of a shower hot and steamy

yeah so for some reason she thought obviously it was her husband do they not have peepholes I'm always a fan of the peephole the peephole

I like the peephole don't you you're a weird thing the peephole yeah well that's why they're there you have a little peep yeah true

in both our situations peepholes do you run a peephole no but maybe I should now after this yeah get a peephole you got a peephole Julian no I've just got a window

next to the door that you can just have a little look out of yeah always peep that's my theory it, I've just got a window next to the door that you can just have a little look out of. Yeah, yeah. Always peep. That's my theory. It's got me in a lot of court cases.

Well, there you go, the peephole. It's a wonderful thing. Like starting your day without your morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben on my hips. I was watching Seven Days last night. It's good to see Seven Days back on. Yeah, it's awesome, mate. Great show.

And they had a funny little story about this lady who was declared dead. She was put in a coffin and she was at the funeral home. Yeah, I read about this. Yeah, and she burst out of the coffin. Turns out she was still living. For two hours or something she'd been there. Yeah, I don't know who takes the hit for that.

Yeah, she was like... Surely the coroner should get her, you know. There's a whole lot of process that would have happened up to that point, right? There's many stages of people who could have checked whether she was still breathing. Yeah. Or there was still a pulse. I blame the Labour government. I do.

I blame the Greens as well. They come in here with their namby-pamby left-wing agenda and people overseas in other countries are being put in coffins and still living. They're getting through. Yeah, it's all climate change. I thought everyone was getting tested. Trump, it's Trump as well. They're getting tested for that.

I blame Judith Collins. Well, she's with joining us after eight, so maybe we can take it. No, okay, I'll stop blaming Judith Collins for this. So we thought we'd open up today funeral faux pas. I tell you what, because putting a person still living in a coffin, that's a faux pas, Ben. Yeah, now obviously we're not trying to make, you know, it can be a thing that's quite, it can be quite serious,

but also there can be moments that happen at a funeral that you're like, you look back on later. Are you saying we're not trying to make light of funerals? Is that what you're trying to say? No, no, that's all I'm trying to do. I'm trying to make light of these horrific situations. No, but, you know, there are moments that you look back later,

a few years later, and you're like, oh, that actually happened. Like my granddad's funeral, which happened probably about a decade ago. Same granddad who you glued his eyes shut with super glue? Yeah, but I remember standing next to my grandma as we were putting the coffin into the ground. It was going at the cemetery.

And someone came up and said, oh, Leonard was a wonderful man. And she was like, thank you very much. So down to earth. And she was like, well, yeah, he's literally down to earth now. I was like, oh, that's quite clever, grandma. So I was like, oh, for that moment, I was like, that, that's quite clever, Grandma. So I was like, oh, for that moment,

I was like, that's impressive, Grandma. All right, so what are your funeral faux pas? What have you seen at the funeral? What have you said to someone at the funeral? Because you never know what to say to people, and I think that's the biggest problem. So 0800, that's the telephone number, 4487. You can text us as well.

Why don't you call New Zealand's Breakfast? Let's have some fun. Let's get into it. I don't know why I'm talking like this. Amber, you're on the air. Yeah, it was my grandmother's funeral. It was the part where we were going up to the grave

putting in the petals and she had this porcelain doll collection and I accidentally kicked one of them and they smashed in the grave like on her coffin. If you're not in ideal conditions

to place porcelain dolls around. I know. Yeah. I get the sentiment. Yeah. Everyone else will be like, wow, she really hated those porcelain dolls. Such a silent moment as well.

An emotional time. Oh, Amber, that's fantastic. Really appreciate it. Kylie's on the phone from Hamilton. Welcome to the programme. Kylie, how's your Friday morning going, mate? It's going good, thank you. Oh, good.

What was your funeral faux pas? Well, my uncle actually dropped his mobile phone into my grandmother's grave when we were at the cemetery. Oh, that's an awkward moment. Yeah, we were all having a shot of my grandmother here at the time, and he put a shot glass, was putting the shot glass into my grandmother's grave. And then when he was doing that, his cell phone fell off. You're like, do I go get it? Do I not get it?

You would almost be like, oh, it's worth just losing it, but you've got a lot of important contacts in there. Yeah, we had to lower him down into the site to get it back. What, with a rope or something, or were you holding his arm? No, it was like my other cousin was holding him

and he was sort of going down. It was quite a sight. So wrong. They're a lot deeper than you think those holes are too, aren't they? Six feet, apparently, they tell me. Thank you, Kylie. That's amazing.

Cool. Really appreciate it. Thank you. And actually, just remind me quickly before we finish this up. A friend of ours, they had a funeral in the family. And at the wake, they were like, where's all the food we ordered? You know, we've ordered all the bloody asparagus rolls. I don't know why asparagus rolls are a thing.

What monster decided to put a stick of asparagus in bread? But not even the good asparagus that's been tinned and canned. Yeah, just slap that in it anyway. We won't get hung up on that. So they're like, where's all the funeral food? And then so they phoned up the catering company. It'd been like an hour later. And they're like, oh, we dropped it off at this address.

And they're like, no, no, that's the wrong address. So someone from the funeral took the bull by the horns and went round to the address where the food had been dropped. They knocked on the door and it got answered, holding a tray, eating a mini pie. That's the greatest day ever. It had 40% of the mini pies. That's the problem with mini pies. You think you need more, don't you?

Yeah, it's so good Start your day the wrong way It's Jono and Ben on the hits And it's show number 100 for us That's right We reached this moment, ladies and gentlemen And we are celebrating We are celebrating like we're New Zealand celebrated

Being 100 days COVID free Remember that? We got swept up in that. That came back to bite us. Hopefully this doesn't have the same effect. Yeah. Ashley Bloomfield's doing a silly dance. Oh, we're all smiling.

He has a broad smile. We were going out. I was kissing everyone. I was licking Ben's face. And, well, that all, we all really, the pin blew that balloon. Something, something there. Something there. There's an analogy.

The show is, you know, let's be honest. We're not the slickest show over the last 100 breakfast shows that we've done. And we're not the sickest either. We've all had tests. No. A virus-free show. But one of our favourite moments when we're looking back at some of our moments was when, Jono, you came in and you were like, this is going to be it.

I'm going to be known as the guy that can type without looking. Yeah, type on a computer. Yeah. And so we put you to the test. Here's how it went. I realised yesterday that I can type

with my eyes closed. You tell me something to type and I've plugged it into that text to speech website and we'll see how I go. Okay. Okay, go. My name is Jono.

My, yeah, name. Oh, shh. Name is Jono. Jono, yeah. And we'll see how I go. Okay. Go. My name is Jono. My name is Jono. Jono, yep. And I am bald. And I am bald. Okay. I'll push start. Are we ready to go, Juju? Yep. My B-A-N-W-U-A-H-E-B-B

equals S-U-N-D-K-S. There we go. There we go. Well, that was some humble pie. Some humble typing pie that I had to eat there. So Boss Todd has kindly given us $100 to give away on our 100th show. We've got to make that last till 9 o'clock. So we're only giving away little bits of it.

We gave away $18 of it earlier before 7 o'clock for some coffees in Taranaki. So right now we have $82 to last us till 9 o'clock. Let's hit them phones. Mark, you're in Christchurch. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast my friend. What do you want this cash for and how much do you need? Firstly, congrats on your 100 shows. Thank you. Thank you. What a milestone.

I was hoping to get some money to shout the family some McDonald's because the kids have done well at school through the COVID break and they've got a couple of wards and stuff. So this is Friday night McDonald's because the kids are doing well at school through the COVID break and they've got a couple of wards and stuff. Oh, so this is Friday night McDonald's? Yes, it is. Friday night McDonald's. What are you thinking

Mark? How much are you thinking? I'm hoping for $30. $30? What are you getting for $30 there? Are you getting one of those big packs? Are you getting specific meals? No, no. I get one of those big packs to share amongst the family. And that's the value, that's the retail value

is 30. I couldn't take you down to 27, Mark. Yeah, I'd take 27. You'd take 27? Okay. Yeah, I'm not greedy. But I don't want

a $3 short you. I don't want you to get to the counter and be like, oh, the guys, yeah. No, you'd have to go, you'd have to awkwardly

explain to the children why they can't have some chips. You've got to go 30. Yeah, less chips in the pack. Oh, Mark, take the 30. Yeah, 30's yours. All right, Mark?

Oh, thank you very much. Enjoy, enjoy. Well done to the kids. Okay, so that's, okay, $52 left, Jono. Okay, now, might I say to you, this $100 was meant to drag the hits through the next 12 months, through the next financial year.

So this is how generous this radio programme is. Let's go to Tony, currently between Blenheim and Christchurch. Welcome to the show, Tony. How you going, guys? We're doing really well, mate. Love it when you call in.

What would you want some money for to celebrate 100 shows? Well, this year's been pretty pricey and kids are getting older eating too much. So normally each year

I donate to the Daffodil Appeal. But this year I just can't afford it. I've done it ever since my nana died from cancer, and I was hoping you guys would chuck in five bucks for me. Well, we would be soulless animals if we said no to this.

Yeah. We'll chuck in ten. Okay, $10 in from that one. Okay, and there we go. Oh, and make it nine, nine. Oh, nine, okay. Oh, jeez, okay, that's it. $43 we have left.

Okay. Thanks, guys. No worries. Good on you, Tony. What a wonderful New Zealander. Thank you very much for listening. Very generous. And the winning doesn't stop there.

It doesn't stop there. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Our next guest on the show is a New Zealand sporting legend. She played 163 tests for the Silver Ferns, 141 of those without missing a game. She captained our side to the World Champs victory

a couple of years ago. This is, of course, Laura Langman, and she just announced her retirement this week. Yeah, we've just been informed by Producer Humphrey there's a lot of unwarranted pressure on this interview thanks to an automated system. Really? Yes.

Welcome to the show, Laura. Kia ora, how are we? Kia ora. Now, we understand we're under severe time pressure here. Oh, no. God, this has got to cut off. Oh, my Jesus. I know.

The call was going to self-destruct in three minutes. Okay, I'll keep it succinct. This better be good from all of us, all right? Make it count, Langman. Make it count. This is more pressure than a test match. I know. Can we just say congratulations quickly on an amazing career for the

Silver Ferns. It's really sad to see you hanging up the white sneakers, I guess is what you do. The bib? But I was watching the footage on the news the other day. You came in as an 18 year old and you had an amazing fringe. Oh God, that was terrible

wasn't it? Mum had too much influence on my life. It was a wonderful fringe. I did see it. It was good. Very wispy, very wispy. When did you lose the fringe? Oh, gosh, not soon enough, apparently. Maybe around the time I found my eyebrows.

You found your eyebrows. And where did your eyebrows go? Mate, I don't know where they've been. Honestly, jeepers creepers. Thank goodness for cosmetic tattooing. I don't know where they've been, honestly. Jeepers creepers. Thank goodness for cosmetic tattooing. I don't know where they've been. Mine have gone missing too. My hair went missing on top of my head too, Laura.

Look, I don't know what we can do about that, but you rock it so well. Now, of course, imagine on an Apple game, you're running all over the course, particularly your position when you play a lot at centre. But I was also reading you even trained on your honeymoon in Hawaii. Oh, look, I think it becomes a habit, to be honest. Do you know why?

Actually, this is the reason. I can't remember what World Cup it was after, and we all got to go on a break, and we came back and we had to do a yo-yo test, which was the first thing we did. This was under resaken, and we all bombed out, like, so bad. And it kind of made you realise you never want to go back to square one. Like, it's better to start a few squares up rather than at rock bottom.

So I think that's probably why. Do you find yourself in your everyday life using your netball skills? Like, pass me the sauce, and you're like, oh, bang! Or, you know, where's the remote control? Whitcher! Oh, gosh, no, but I do kind of sometimes celebrate, you know, when something's kind of falling off the bench and you get it before it hits the ground high. I'm just like, oh, good hand.

But an amazing career, so many highlights for you, but what would be the one thing that you look back on for the Silver Ferns and you're like, oh, that was pretty awesome? Oh, truth is... Oh, okay, one thing, one thing. Oh, that was the one minute. That was the one minute.

That was the one minute. Probably, I think, the World Cup. Like, for me personally, I went in there with so much, like, oh, my gosh, am I going to be up to it? And for me personally, I just had to be... it forced me into a space where I had to be happy with what I had to provide. And I was going to contribute as much as I could for as long as I could. And it brought me to today. Do you know, I'm very stressed out right now.

This is the most stressful interview I've had, counting down. Okay, we'll make this quick. You're also a chartered accountant. Oh, gosh, don't bring that up. Yeah, no, that's all the questions I have about that. Okay, you're all... No, we'll make this quick. You're also a chartered accountant. Oh, of course. Don't be better. Yeah, no, that's all the questions I have about that.

Okay, you're great. Hey, Laura, into a quick... Oh! Is she gone? Is she gone? It's brutal. Savage.

What a savage system. Who invented that system? I didn't even know this was a system. Laura Langman... I don't even think it was. I think she just got her husband on the phone

to put on a voice. Well, Laura Langman, Silver Fern't even think it was. I think she just got her husband on the phone to put on a voice. Well, Laura Langman, Silver Ferns legend, still playing in Australia on the side. Okay, anything else you wanted to ask Laura, you asked me.

Oh, mate, look, okay. Now in the news this week, a lot of lovely words said about you from previous coaches and players like Noeline Tairua and Irene Van Dyke.

Can you guess some of the words that they've said, and I want to see if they both said five words each on you. Okay. Nice. Not one. Inspirational. No.

Generous. No. Heartfelt. You're in the ballpark. Balls. Balls. No. Goals. Bibs. Balls. No. Goals.

Bibs. Silver Fern. No, not the words. Professional netball. Tenacious. Tenacious. Committed. That was it.

Funny, dogged. Loyal. Exceptional. Work ethic. Groundbreaking. Humorous. And humble. So there we go.

A very brutal interview with Laura Langman, Silver Ferns legend. Wake up full of shame. Wake up with these guys. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Spy. Know what's up? Spy.co.nz. These are hands down the most important news stories in the world.

Now here's producer Juliette with which Celebrity Treasure Island contestant has a contagious skin irritation. Here's Spy. So a video of Chris Hemsworth is doing the rounds on the internet. Now, here's producer Juliette with which Celebrity Treasure Island contestant has a contagious skin irritation. Yes, bye. So, a video of Chris Hemsworth is doing the rounds on the internet. It's a motivational, inspirational speech. And ladies, if this doesn't do things for you, I don't know what will. Hey, you. Yes, yes, yes, you. Today is your day.

You got this. You're absolutely crushing it at everything you do, from your job to maintaining a social life to pursuing your passion project you're killing it ignore anyone who tells you otherwise because you you're amazing the only thing more beautiful than your smile is your personality yeah I said it you're more than capable to take on the world the whole world by storm speaking of the world did you know that it's a better place because you're in it and your mom brags about you all the time. Dogs love you. You're strong. You're confident.

You're intelligent. You're charismatic. You're the total package. On a scale from 1 to 10, you are an 11. You make me want to be a better man. You are bloody brilliant. You're f***ing brilliant. Don't forget it. Okay? Do not forget it. Take the day by storm and remember this. I'm proud of

you. Amazing. Wow, what a forget it. Take the day by storm and remember this. I'm proud of you. Amazing. What a voice, too. They're quite vague. No specifics. Oh, yeah. First message to everyone. I want him to talk to me. Jono. He says, yeah. He added, Jono, I'll direct it if you want. He sounds a little bit disinterested. A little bit.

I've been deep diving into his Instagram account. It's like if Jesus was still alive and had an Instagram account. I know. And he's surfing big waves shirtless. Honestly, tell me about it. He's working out shirtless. He's going camping with his family.

He's shirtless. And he's just like, everything he does, it looks like a model shoot. Even when he's camping, if it was me camping, I'd be tangled up in some cords, emptying out the bloody tank from the caravan, you know, the one that fills up? No, but he's not. He's not doing that.

He's looking shirtless and amazing, right? Just looking magnificent. That whole family, gosh, they've been blessed with the great genes, haven't they? Oh, haven't they? I could just stare at them forever. Let's just take a moment and soak in the Hemsworths. Yeah.

All right, moving on. There we go. And Khloe Kardashian, she has been asked by her ex-partner Tristan Thompson to move back in with him. Now, if you remember, there was that big drama where Tristan cheated on Khloe with Kylie's best friend. Now, we don't know what happened. But there was some footage of him in a nightclub with his face in another lady's chest. Now, I have always backed that he was just looking for his EFPLOS card. He's a professional

basketball player. His hands were tired. He can't use his hands to find it. So the only logical solution was use his face to try and find his EFPLOS card. It was that or he knew COVID was coming. He didn't have a mask. That was the only option. Shielding his face. Someone

is about to sneeze. Her chest was his PPE gear Yeah True So he's keen for her to move in She said no That's not happening at all So good that she

She can They seem to be quite friendly now though right Yeah They're probably doing that whole Unconscious coupling thing That Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow did I love that when something like this goes down

We all become so judgy I even had an opinion on it. I'm in New Zealand and I don't matter to anyone. Yeah, you're right. But what I found really like double standards was everyone was like, oh, he's a dog. I'm not defending him or anything like that. But then there was the whole Bradley Cooper, Lady Gaga thing around the same time.

True. And he was married Bradley Cooper and everyone was like, oh, he should get together with Lady Gaga. So was it okay for him to go off and get with, and not the... Everyone was like, Pasha on stage again, Oscars man. Even when you're right in the front row. Pasha. Pasha for the rest of us.

Tristan Thompson apparently did it. Everyone's like, oh, how could you do this? True. Double standards there, for sure. And if you want to check out some more spa, you can go to the hits.co.nz. Low in calories and low in laughs. It's Jono and Ben on my hits. Time to do the A to Z of New Zealand. The A to Z of New Zealand.

We call a different town or city in New Zealand. We do one a day. We're going through New Zealand alphabetically. It's going to take us over a couple of years to call every town and city. We're slowly ripping through the country like a pandemic virus, aren't we? And yesterday, Featherston, Ben,

which was near your hometown in Masterton, the highest concentration of bookshops in the Southern Hemisphere. Well, one of, one of, compared to the population. You love a bookshop. Well, we're an official booktown, you see. Yeah, the booktown. So, yeah, we sell shitloads of books here. So many books.

Maybe that should be the town's slogan. Today we're going to Fielding Well it's on State Highway 54 20km north of Palmerston North and the town currently extending its CBD beautification featuring paving, planter boxes, new footpaths for the delinquent youth to graffiti and or relieve themselves on The Manawatu Plains on which the town is sited are the most fertile land in

New Zealand. Even just walking on the grass in Fielding will impregnate you. And we're going to go through to a Fielding celebrity. Oh yeah, we thought we'd call this person. He doesn't know we're calling, but social media superstar William Waroa. You all know him from Dancing with the Stars as well? He's got the distinctive glasses. He's very

funny online. Well, he's originally from Fielding, so we thought we'd give him a call. Surprise him. Hello? William Wara. Kia ora. It's John O'Byrne calling from the Hits radio station. Apologies for the call.

How you doing? Morena. Apologise. Morena. Listen, we're doing an undercover sting for the inland revenue. And you're not part of the investigation. No, you're not. I just want to say you're clear.

No, we're doing the A to Z of New Zealand. That's a segment we do each day where we call a different town or city in New Zealand. And we're doing it alphabetically. And today is Fielding's turn. And we're like, Fielding, that's where you're from. Yeah, yeah, most definitely that's where I'm from. I thought you might have called Aaron Smith. Oh, is he fielding too? Did you guys

grow up together? Yeah, yeah, we grew up together. Because you play rugby together with him, mate? Yeah, we played footy and we played cricket together. We were the only two Maldives playing cricket. It's me, Aaron and Daryl Tuffy. Only three in New Zealand. Well, you're only eight players off a full team?

Yeah. I'm looking at the pictures of fielding, and I must say the roundabout with the clock in the centre of town are magnificent. Aesthetically pleasing, yeah. It's just fantastic. It's right in the middle of town. It's a central point.

We used to hang out back in the day. Oh, it's an amazing place there. They call it Friendly Fielding, don't they? Yeah, Friendly Fielding and winner of the national title seven years in a row. Well, the friendliest town in New Zealand. Does anyone else enter this or is it just... I think it's on the sign that you come into town. So they really take a lot of pride in letting everyone know that,

which is fair enough. But is there a pressure to always be friendly, though? Some days you don't want to be friendly. Oh, mate, there's that thing that's always in the back of your head, always be friendly. It's friendly and clean, I think. Friendly and clean or something, I don't know. Oh, it's two of them.

Oh, wow. Yeah, it's a double, It's a jewel of water. What a beauty. So what's the one thing we should do if anyone's going to fielding? What's the one thing you'd recommend? I'd say mini golf was pretty famous there. Oh, cool. The Manfield track.

The mini golf is awesome stuff. Growing up, I was 10 the last time I went there, so it's probably changed extravagantly. You always have fond memories of things when you're kids. I am 49 now. Hey, well, so, Willie Wairua, thank you so much. That was friendly fielding. We've heard all about it.

Oh, man, I hadn't even scratched the surface. What else is there to do? Sorry, that was just one of those statements that you're just like wrapping it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. All the stuff you could do. Wrap up. Wrap it up.

Yeah, well, that's for another time. William Wano, thank you for answering your phone. We appreciate it. And sorry for putting you on the spot. No, you're all right, mate. Thank you. Boys, have a good day. The A to Z of New Zealand will continue on Monday.

Like starting your day with panda eyes. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. It's every second Friday, actually. The National Party leader, Judith Collins, how's it going? Oh, great, thank you, Dave. I'm on my way to Invercargill today. Oh, yeah, your phone sounds like it's going to Invercargill. I'm at the airport.

Oh, right. What are you looking at right now, Judith Collins? What I'm looking at? I'm looking at seeing a lot of planes on the tarmac. Oh, right. Are you in the Coru Lounge? Are you sitting out in the... Yes, I'm in the Coru Lounge.

Oh, lovely. Having a little club sandwich or something for Brekkie? Yes, I did. I did eat. Thank you. I did eat. Thank you. And that's all I'll say on that.

No further questions on that one. High-fibre diet. I was actually thinking in all seriousness, and this probably backs it up, is it annoying to deal with the media as a politician? Because it must be just the barrage all the time. There are times when you think, oh, come on. But actually, mostly it's pretty good.

In my business, there's plenty of politicians who nobody in the media wants to talk to. When you say, oh, come on, was one of those moments when I asked you what you've been eating for breakfast? Yeah, that's one. Yeah, chalk that up as one. It's been a lot worse. It's been a lot worse, guys. The mosque shooter yesterday handed down the life sentence, rightfully so.

Would you be keeping him in New Zealand, or do you send him back to Australia? Well, you know, the temptation is to send him back to Australia. The problem with that, and I'll tell you, is when I last checked, Australians had about 900 New Zealanders in their prisons and they want to get rid of them so that we get to pay the cost of them.

So actually, I'd probably keep him here so that they keep the other 900. Oh, so you mean they'll sort of end up in a trade negotiation of prison? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, you know, the Aussies, look, be careful when you go and do deals with the Australians. Right. I'd be real careful about that one. Okay, because a lot of people are going, get him back in the East Australian.

Winston Peters yesterday was saying, yeah, that was his theory, right? Yeah. Yeah, a lot of people think it's a great idea until I tell them, you know, just be careful what you wish for. You might get a lot more. Now, Judith Collins joins us, leader of the National Party. You're very good with politics in general, but office politics. We wanted to ask you a couple of quick questions we have around the office.

So firstly, if I'm going to microwave a dinner from the night before, do I need to cover it in the work microwave or not? Yes, you do. And I would use a paper towel myself or something else like that. I wouldn't use, you know, plastic wraps because that

could be bad. No, that kills dolphins and turtles. We're putting that into the kids. My daughter keeps telling me, can I double down on that one, actually? Is it okay for him to then bring his fish meal in and microwave that in the microwave? That was once. Oh, that's pretty tough, that one.

Yeah. Clean out the whole microwave afterwards. Yeah, okay. What about sending an email? Was it okay to send it all in caps? Can you send it in caps like that? No. Do you know what?

I get the odd one like that, and it's really easy. What you do is you press the delete button. Oh, you delete caps emails. Okay. Get it someone shouting at you. It is, you're right. But I send it because I don't know how to take it out of it anyway. If the boss is not at work, is it okay to park in their

car park? Not if I'm the boss. Even when you're not there, you want your car park free just so you know you can park. Final question in office politics for Judith Collins. Are we obligated to buy a cake for someone on their birthday in the office?

Well, if you do it for one, you've got to do it for everyone. There we go. Same rule. Would National provide cakes for all office birthdays? I'll put that to you. I think you're sort of following for everything at the moment, so why not? Why not?

They can look into it. There we go. Birthday cakes for all. That's a joke. That's a joke. That's a joke. Don't worry, it's not what you've been sent to the Herald. Judith Collins, all the best in Invercargill today.

We appreciate your time, and we'll catch up with you soon. Thanks, guys. We apologise in advance. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, normally on a Friday, I like to do this. Ben Voice Productions Limited proudly presents Jono Fryer's Worst Moments of the Week. It's got a whole intro now, that segment.

It's become a thing. It's a brand. We look back at Jono's worst moments of the week, but I thought because it's show number 100, we'd look back at some of your worst moments across the 100. There's too many juice ones, guys. It's lovely. I've been concerned all morning about playing all of this week. But I thought because it's show number 100, we'll look back at some of your worst moments across the 100. There's too many juice ones. I have been concerned all morning about playing all of this stuff. It really does highlight to management that there's been a

huge mistake getting us over. But I didn't even think I was going to make it to 100 days, thanks to old age. So I'm just happy to be here. And you know, other shows, they may be celebrating 2, 3, 4,000 shows. Yeah, not us. Not us. Well, we don't know if we're going to make it past 100 shows. That's right.

So we'd better celebrate the little one. The little ones. We've still got, I think, $11 left of our $100 to give away before nine o'clock. And it's been such a celebration, a joyous occasion for all involved. But one of my favourite moments was, well, from you, a low light from you, Jono, was when you talked about sticky fingers in the morning. Now, the building is relatively empty, where we're broadcasting from at the moment,

and we've decided to get a little sticky in the finger department. Please never say that again. Please, please never say that again. So what he's trying to say, but he made it sound weird, is we found a pretty sweet paddle board. No one claimed it because no one was around to claim it. And then our sticky fingers took this paddle board and are giving away on the radio.

Please don't let my mother hear that. She'll be so disappointed. Annie Pryor in Christchurch. And then there was another moment I'd like to play, John O'Prior's lowlights of 100 episodes, when Jared from ZM, poor little Jared, innocent Jared,

got a heck of a fright. Innocent, sweet, sweet Jared. From you, you monster. I'm like Alan DeGeneres. Every morning we do a little thing where either of us scare each other when we walk into work. I was hidden around the corner,

producer Juliet, you were filming, you were under a desk and we were waiting for Ben to arrive. And I just heard footsteps. And I jumped out. And it was this poor little fella from ZDM. Poor little James from ZDM.

And he was holding a glass of water and it spilled everywhere. And he just got... He had the look of, like, fear, panic. And why? Why did you just do that to me? So you've given him a fright. And then just before, what did you call him?

He's not James. His name's Jared. Another vintage prior moment. Champagne prior. There were so many choices to go with, but I'm going to go with this one about how you described how I put you to sleep. One point, I think you would have observed that I like my oral hygiene. And I also carry around, and I have done for probably five or six years,

I have gum. And I like it. I freshen up the breath. I like the smell of it. I tell you what, Ben Boyce has the freshest breath in New Zealand. He blows me to sleep sometimes with him. Okay. Let's not talk about that.

I'll be right here. Oh, listen, okay, looking at that stuff, chalk them up as learning lessons. Yeah, no, you're right. And the positive is only up from here or probably even further down, probably further down into the depths. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram.

Scrolling through your feed. Oh, no one gets to the heart of the story like Mike Hosking. So if you want proper news, you should probably go listen to him. If you want Ben Boyce's hot takes, though, you've come to the right place. And now US President Donald Trump, it's a couple of months away from the elections in America, and he's called for himself and his Democratic challenger, Joe Biden, to take a drug test. Oh, he loves a test. Arnold loves it.

He's always taking tests and bragging about his results. You remember that one he took a couple of weeks ago? I think that was basically a dementia test to see how your brain was functioning, but he took it as being an intelligence test and he was bragging about how well we did. In the Fox poll, they asked people whose mind is sounder. Biden beats you in that.

Well, I tell you what, let's take a test. Joe and I will take a test. Let him take the same test that I took. Incidentally, I took the test, too, when I heard that you passed it. Well, it's not the hardest test. No, but the last... It has a picture and it says, what's that? And it's an elephant.

No, no, yes, the first few questions are easy. But I'll bet you couldn't even answer the last five questions. I'll bet you couldn't. They get very five questions. I'll bet you couldn't. They get very hard. Well, one of them was come back from 100 by 7. Let me tell you, you couldn't answer many of the questions. I'd get you the test. I'd like to give it.

But I guarantee you that Joe Biden could not answer those questions. Okay. He loves a bloody test. He does. Joe Biden, who he's running against. 77 years old Joe Biden, we just discovered before. Gee, he makes Prince Philip look great, this guy. But I make both of them look old.

He was Joe Biden's response to taking the test that Donald Trump wanted him to take. No, I haven't taken the test. Why the hell would I take a test? If he can't figure out the difference between an elephant and a lion, I don't know what the hell he's talking about. Why is he not taking the test? He needs to take the test. Remember that thing you played last week? Oh, yeah. I don't know what the hell he's talking about. Why is he not taking the test? He needs to take the test. Remember that thing

you played last week? Oh, yeah. He doesn't know the difference. He may be able to tell the difference between an elephant and a lion. But not a sister and his wife. They don't call Super Tuesday

for nothing. By the way, this is my little sister, Valerie, and I'm Jill's husband. Oh, no. Valerie switched on me. This is my wife. This is my sister., and I'm Jill's husband. Oh, no, this is my... Valerie, you switched on me. This is my wife. This is my sister.

They switched on me. They switched on me. I love it. And I'm Joe's. I'm Joe's husband. And I'm Joe's husband. And he's getting salty at the end for switching on him. It's like, mate, no matter if they switch,

you should still be able to distinguish the two. And actor Macaulay Culkin, you'll know him from Home Alone movies. Well, he, yesterday, put on his Instagram. He's like, hey, guys, want to feel old? I'm 40. He's 40? You're welcome. Yeah, of course, Home Alone movie.

What a great moment, this one. Come on! I love that. Kevin. Kevin! Yeah, so Kevin 40. And a couple of days ago on Tuesday, this guy here. Bond.

James Bond. Sean Connery, 90 years old. 90? 90 this week. So there you go. Well, you just forget about people, don't you? And I suppose, you know, as life happens, people get older. It's just a fact of life.

I haven't thought about Sean Connery for many years. No, but he was great. I thought he was already dead. No. There's a lot of those people, eh, that you think are dead, but they're not dead. Well, you're like, oh, okay, what happened to, yeah. Yeah. Well, I guess he's probably, he doesn't need to act anymore, I would imagine, so he's probably

retired from acting, so there you go. I mean, people probably think we're dead, but we're not. We're here on the hits. We're here on the hits for the Six O'Clock Club. Some may call this the graveyard of radio. Not us. We're living, baby. Making poor life decisions every morning. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. As we mentioned before, we've been

doing this radio show, this breakfast show, New Zealand's breakfast for 100 shows. So we wanted to celebrate today and we can't celebrate being the best show around, but we can celebrate being something else like this moment. Like this moment right here when you were pointing to play to a replay

and then we ended up playing Call on the Gang celebration. Oh, here we go. That just demonstrates what the show is, you know, the backbone of the show. But this is the problem. What I love is the miscommunication between Ben and producer Juliet. Now, just to bring you up to speed, producer

Juliet sits behind a desk, pushes the button. She does a great job. She does a fantastic job. But Ben recklessly points at her, and sometimes... When I want something played off there because I don't play the computer, I just point. But sometimes I just point. And he hasn't told Juliet what he wants her to play.

She doesn't know. It's all on me. It's all on me. I mean, Juliet was best new broadcaster. You know, like, best'm best washed up hack. And here's one of the highlights of those moments. 628, good morning to you. Sorry, guys.

Flustered. What are we doing? It's all right. Controversial call-outs. Controversial call-outs. Controversial call-outs. What I love about it is about the honesty of this show. I'm pointing at Juliet to play the music video.

They're like, sorry guys, I'm flustered. Anyway, we're the most flustered radio show. It's good to have a point of difference.

So it's hard to make controversial call-outs where we just say something controversial like, oh, I'm flustered, sorry guys. This actually might,

today's 100th show, Miles Stone, might actually serve as a wonderful reminder to management that they've made a shocking decision Like, oh, I'm busted. Sorry, guys. This actually might, today's 100th show milestone might actually serve as a wonderful reminder to management that they've made a shocking decision putting this program on. But we have $100 to give away to mark our 100th show, but that money's got to last until 9 o'clock this morning, so we want to know on the phones, why do you want just a little bit of it?

And we'll give you a little bit. Caitlin, Caitlin, welcome from New Plymouth. Can you give us some sort of congratulations or something nice, mate? Oh, congratulations, guys. Thank you, thank you. How important is this show in your life?

What sort of role does it play? Bring us up to speed. I listen to it most mornings and afternoons. I always try to call in as well. Does it make you become a better person in this programme? Your thoughts?

Debatable. Okay, okay. Most mornings, we'll take most mornings. Yeah, would you put it in the same category as your Oprah Winfrey's? Does it make you become a better person in this program? Your thoughts? Debatable. Okay. Most mornings. We'll take most mornings. Yeah. Would you put it in the same category as your Oprah Winfrey's? Absolutely. Yeah.

Good, good. I feel like I'm putting words in your mouth. Yeah, you definitely are. Thank you for politely agreeing, Karen. How much of this $100 would you like? I'd just like $20 to get myself and the three of the other nurses working this morning a coffee. Ooh, 20's a lot. That's a lot out of that 100.

But they are nurses and they're doing great work for New Zealand. It would look quite savage of the show to take $20 away from nurses. It would. You can still hear us. They're doing good work, those nurses. They are. They're doing amazing work. We'd be monsters to say no.

18? Yeah, I're doing good work, those nurses. They are, they're doing an amazing work. And we'll be monsters to say no. I don't know if I'm going to have to. 18? 18, yeah, I'll take 18. She'll take 18? She'll take 18. She'll take 18. She'll give it to them. It's $18. Oh, okay.

$18 is all yours. All right. Love your work, Caitlin. Appreciate you listening to the show. You have a great day. Enjoy those coffees. We have more of that $100 to go. Don't go anywhere.

We're making it rain, ladies and gentlemen. That's what we're saying. Wake up and smell them. Actually, no, please don't smell them. That's odd. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, a couple of days ago on our A to Z of New Zealand, which we do every day on the show,

where we call a different town and place in New Zealand, a one a day, we call Fairleigh, producer Humphrey's hometown. Yeah, welcome in, producer Humphrey. Yeah. Yeah, welcome in, Producer Humphrey. Yeah, great to be here. Producer Humphrey, the backbone of this show, of this shambolic programme. Happy 100 shows to you, mate.

Not claiming that. He definitely doesn't want that on his resume. This is a stepping stone for Producer Humphrey's career. I don't know where to. Maybe a stepping stone out of the building. But you came in with a wonderful, wonderful conversation yesterday after the show. Yeah. Something that you don't even factor in

when thinking about the farming community. When I'm thinking farmers, I'm thinking calloused hands, I'm thinking one-syllable answers, I'm thinking putting a hand on a fence post. Yep, yep. And I'm thinking wrapping my hands around an udder and moving those hands up and down.

Well, we talked to your mate Baz, and he's a... Bruce. Bruce, sorry. Bruceder and moving those hands up and down. Well, we talked to your mate Baz and he's... Bruce. Bruce, sorry. Bruce. And he does a very special job. Yeah. So it got me thinking when we were talking to him about the skills that you have when you have one job to do,

like you're talking about milking a cow, but you've got to have other skills behind you like maths. Maths is very big in farming. You've got to be able to count your stock. Yeah, so you don't factor that in. No. I never think about the farmers having to add up all how many animals they have. But it's an obvious thing when you think about it. Yeah, it's big money. If you miscount how many stock you've got, you're losing money in the pocket. Lose a cow. Bruce said a cow was $2,400 the other day. Yeah. Did he? Something like that.

So they can basically look at a paddock or look at cows or sheep running down a little run and go, oh yeah, that's how many. Yeah, so normally they get them into the yards and then have them run past and so they'll get the dog to chase the sheep through and then you'll count them. As they're running past a fence gate?

Yeah, so basically you line yourself up with a post and you count them as they go past. But you can't count them ones because they run past so fast. And they all look the same. They do. That's a bit racist to sheep, I'm sorry. And so, yeah, my dad, he used to count in seven. So instead of counting one sheep, he would count seven sheep as one

and then times at the end. But if you're counting a mob of, you know, 300-odd sheep, you've got to be a mathematician. High-stress situation. I wouldn't be able to do it. Beyond me. You can't start again, too. You can't go, oh, I miscounted.

Come back, guys. Come back. Everyone back up. It's a one-shot, one opportunity. That's impressive. Panic counting sheep. Well, it's not going to put you to sleep, is it? Well, that's what happens, though, right?

Counting sheep doesn't mean to put you to sleep. Well, it's's what happens though right? Counting sheep does mean to put you to sleep Well it's supposed to but yeah Not counting in sevens as they're sprinting past you I was saying also that I spoke to the Mad Butcher Sir Peter Leach And his job with the Warriors When he was manager a few years ago Was to count the players on the bus

It's a very stressful situation Because you don't want to miss a player No well Mad Butcher He's publicly admitted he's dyslexic. Yes. So he must have trouble counting anyway. He said the players would all go 24, 18, 17, you know, just to mess with them. You know, it's a very tough, stressful situation.

I think, to be fair to the Mad Butcher, we should be able to rely on rugby league players, grown men, to make their own way to the bus and not have to be counted. Yeah, yeah. Counted like sheep. To be fair, have you read about the NRL? Not the Warriors though. They're fine.

But yeah, that's a very good point. We haven't had many. Have we had a sex scandal this year at the NRL? I don't know. No. I don't know.

Has there been one? There's been all of them. There was that school visit at the start of the season. They all went in a bubble and stuff, I think. Oh, right. Maybe this is why COVID was created,

to keep NRL players locked in the same room. Some people skip breakfast, the meal, and also this show. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Spy. Go WhatsApp. Spy.co.nz. This is what I like to affectionately call the hot people news bulletin. No agos allowed in these stories.

If you're an ago, I'm sorry, you're just going to have to appear in the real news. What a beautiful intro. It's Juliet with Spy. Thank you. So Katie Perry and Orlando Bloom have had their daughter, I think they posted it yesterday. So assuming that they had given birth to their daughter

yesterday or the day before. The unconventional way of getting her around the country. I know, right? So assuming that they had given birth to their daughter yesterday or the day before. Unconventional way of getting her around the country, but hey. I know, right? And they've named her Daisy Dove Bloom. What a beautiful name. Oh, that's cute. It is quite a cute name, isn't it? Daisy's an adorable name.

That California girl roared when she was wearing her Daisy Jukes. Yeah, from when they had the song, yeah. Wow, and she's also in the photo there holding Daisy's hand and she's even got a little Daisy painted on her nail. I feel like she's really planned it.

Yeah, obviously had. She has, yeah. She thought about the gram. She thought about, oh, what's the post going to be? Yeah, that's good. That's the most important

thing when you're giving birth is to think about the gram. That's what I've always found. People on YouTube post birthing videos now. They're like, our birthing story and they get like

a cinematographer in the birthing room with them. Oh my God, that poor camera operator must be traumatised. I know, that's a thing that YouTubers do now. It's kind of bizarre.

They're like, I officially retire from camera work. I've seen some things. Well, yeah. It's certainly an interesting experience when you're in there. There's a lot to take in, isn't there?

You're like, wow, there's a lot happening here. From my point of view, from the sidelines, when I was there. I's a lot to take in, isn't there? You're like, wow, there's a lot happening here. It's all going on. From my point of view, from the sidelines when I was there. I can't make it about you.

Yeah. I was like, man, there's so much waiting around. I don't. He always tells me off for saying that. But there was.

There was a lot of waiting around. Did either of you faint or anything at any point? but we had a few complications with Sienna and there was a machine that just kept beeping and it kept beeping

and that's never a good news and they'd just quietly go and turn it off and not say what it was. You'd be like, what's the machine? And then they'd be talking to each other. You're like, oh, this is not, you know. And then we had to go for an emergency C-section. But that was happening for a while. Right.

Well, it's weird like when you know something's clearly going on. They just sort of go quietly go and turn that off. Bam, bam, bam, bam. Sort of whisper it out of conversation. You're like, please tell me what's going on. Yeah, for sure. I found the most complicated part, cutting the umbilical cord. Did you do that? Yeah, and I'm a

left-hander, so I'm no good with scissors. And so I really had to give it a good old hack. It's quite firm. It's like cutting an electrical cable, isn't it? Yeah, there's a lot going on. This is a little tip for you, Juju. Thank you. So make sure whoever impregnates you has a good scissor hand.

I will. We'll get someone in there for the cutting, like a mirror or something if he's used to it. And Brad Pitt, he has got a new girlfriend. She is 29 years younger than him.

He's 56, she's 27. She's a German model. She kind of looks a bit like Angelina Jolie. She's got the big lips going on. That's what people have been saying, eh? It looks very similar to her. Yeah. I mean, he's a great model She kind of looks a bit like Angelina Jolie She's got the big lips going on That's what people have been saying He's a great looking guy Oh my god I know

Would he just have anything in common with someone 29 years younger than him Fine dude I'd be dating an 11 year old I've got nothing in common with an 11 year old It's such a huge age gap You get to adults He's Hollywood Leonardo DiCaprio is known for dating He keeps getting older huge age gap. Yeah, but you get to adults and I don't know. I don't know, you know, he's Hollywood. He's in a mansion.

They'd be happy. Leonardo DiCaprio is known for dating. Well, he keeps getting older and he keeps keeping it at 21 years old. I know. I'm like, does that

make me eligible, Leo, yet? No, you're too old, mate. God damn it. You're a geriatric. God damn it. Well, Spire, you can go to the hits.co.nz. This is your new breakfast.

Health Star rating, still pending. It's Jorgo and Mano Mahez That is the end of our show We like to end things on a positive note A filling Yes

Why's today going to be a good day? Well I tell you why it's going to be a good day for me Friday is thigh day I go straight from here to the CrossFit gym

and do seven hours Which is not open because they let you in by yourself They do Just by myself I have to do seven hours of intense therapy

and work on my thighs. And that's how they look so good. Thigh day. Okay, thigh day. Let's go to the phones. It is a Friday hour. But we still need to start the day positive, don't we? Yeah, we do.

Let's go loose. What's going to be a good day for you, Lucy Loose? It's going to be a great day today. Don't go into too much detail. It's not like we're trying to pad out time for a timeout ad break. What's going on today? What's happening? It's my sister's birthday today and I just want to

wish her a big happy birthday. Oh, that's wonderful, Lucy. Have we got the Carol... Oh, I've got a special song for your sister from Carol Baskin. You may know her from the Tiger King doco. Go Charlotte, it's your birthday. We're going to party like it's your birthday.

We're going to sip Bacardi like it's your birthday. And you know we don't give a fudge that it's your birthday. Oh, there you go. What a fitting tribute for your sister's birthday. Double Pastor Redding, Cinema's coming your way. Thanks for listening. Have a great weekend. Thank you so much.

Enjoy the weekend. You too, Lucy. What a lovely lady. Louise, you're in Christchurch. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. You tell us why it's going to be a good one in Canterbury. Louise.

Oh, now I'm going to have to get shouty. You don't like it when I get shouty. No, it was special in this segment because it's a good day segment. It makes me nice, but it winds me up, this sort of stuff. It's just when people,

they phone us up and then they refuse to talk. Louise! No, you're getting shouted. You don't know. Louise! Louise. What happened to Louise? Well, they're calling her back.

I think we lost connection with Louise. She actually wanted to stipulate why it was going to be a good day. You know why it's going to be a good day for Louise? Nearly four weeks of giving up the darts. Oh, that's great. No smokes for Louise. Yeah. Four weeks of giving up the darts, Lou. Giving up the darts, Oh, that's great. No smokes for this. Yeah. So the four weeks of giving up the darts,

Lou? Giving up the darts, guys. Oh, well done. It's exciting. Well done. It might not seem like a lot, guys, for some people, but when you've smoked

for over 40 years. 40 years, that's an illustrious career in cancer. It's a pretty good going, isn't it? Well done. Four weeks is awesome.

A great effort. A double pass. The Reading Cinema's coming your way. Have a great weekend. Oh, guys, thank you so much and I love listening to you as well. We weeks is awesome. A great effort. A double pass to Reading Cinema's coming your way. Have a great weekend. Oh, guys, thank you so much, and I love listening to you as well. We love you too. You can put that in your pipe and smoke it, but not literally.

No, not surely. Have a great weekend. Don't forget, you can catch up on the podcast at iHeartRadio. And today's the day. Food, petrol, power bills paid for an entire year. That prize has been given away at 5 o'clock today. Have a great weekend. Want more Jono and Ben?

You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from 6 on The Hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast. Friends of Skinny.