Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Best Of The Week: Peeing Pants , Self-Service, and Timed Chats

Episode Date: August 30, 2025

Missed Jono, Ben & Megan this week? We’ve got you.Catch the best bits from the week, all wrapped up in one bite-sized piece. Hear Ben admit to peeing his pants, and listen as we break the Taylor Swift engagement news to someone. Jono struggles to comprehend self-service, and Megan reveals that her hubby has started timing their conversations.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Jono Ben and Megan podcast, thanks to Dilma. Goodness really does taste great. Dilma, making the world a better team. I have a bedtime parade. That's what we call it. Like, bedtime parade is put all my lotions and potions and all that jazz on. How long does it take you usually? About 15 minutes.

Yeah, that's quite, yeah. Add that up over a week. Yeah, true. What does it involve, a bit of removing makeup, applying some moisturizers, bits and pieces? Lots of moisturisers and syrimms. and stuff, and then I've started putting them on my hands. I'm like, put everything on my hands. You're quite paranoid about getting old lady hands, aren't you?

So you've got driving gloves too. Yeah, I've got driving gloves. And I've got, like, under-eye serum, and then I've got, like, eyebrow and eyelash serum, so I've got to put all that on. And now there's something I do right before I go to bed. Do you think they work? This isn't a loaded question. I don't know.

You just don't know if that stuff works. Like, we just... Yeah. I feel like it does. Yeah. So... Hang out, well, long as it makes sure. You're happy in doing what you know?

Yeah. Do you. So I've added something else. And it's like when I get into bed, I sit on the bed and I've decided to start moisturizing my feet. Because you know how you get like dry feet? And I was like, why should my feet be neglected? What do you want to say, Ben, talk is it open for?

Just wait, just wait for bed for it. That's a step too far. So I was like, people get cracked heels and stuff. So I'm like, what if I moisturise and that's not going to happen and when I have nice, like, supple feet? So you're doing this for your feet just before bed? Yeah.

Right. Don't you have greasy feet though? Yeah. Aren't the bed sheets getting all greased up with greasy? Yeah. Not the bed sheets. So herein lies my problem. So I do it right before I go to bed

and I'm like putting on this cream and it's supposed to be good for, you know, like, cracked hands. Oh, for hands, right, okay, yeah. This might be my problem. So the past few days, I've been walking around. And I'm like, man, I've got sweaty feet. Like, I've got red, because I'm not wearing socks. I wear, like, heels.

You're slipping and sliding all around, yeah. And I'm like, what is wrong with my feet? I've got, like, sweaty feet. Because you've leathered them up with grease, mate. Yeah, so it's not soaking in very well. So I've literally still got greasy feet in the morning. No one wants greasy feet. No, I know.

We've got, what we've got is we've got, like, tiles out in reception. We could take Megan's shoes off and, like, put like a curling, game of curling. Slider a lot. It's like a snail. So, yeah, I'm going to have, like, nice, supple, greasy feet, but it's not a conducive to wearing shoes every day. And it does feel like your bedsheets are going to get, like, John I was saying, I remember you always say, we had that debate, do you wash below your knees in the shower?

Yeah. And Ben was like, I washed my feet every day. I remember you were going to try to send a selfie of your washed feet to us. Well, I was going to, to me, and then I noticed that the plug hole was reflecting. Yeah, it was like so metallic, and it was. That's not a flattering angle. No, it wasn't. and thank God I didn't send that selfie.

That would have been cance the board. Don't just, by the way, don't see me a fluttering angle either. No, no. Yeah, okay, great. I was just wanting to get the feet in that, no, anyway. I'd love to see that angle, though, just for comedic purposes. Be like, oh, yeah? You're like, this is what the ants see.

Double chin and. Yeah, just whatever's going on underneath. You don't want to look at the undercarriage. Yeah, definitely not so good. It's not great from any angle, but that one is especially. I don't know, yeah, I don't know what's happening down there for me, to be honest. John O'O Ben and Megan. The podcast.

Megan, you say this from time to time, and I thought of you yesterday when this happened. Again, I don't know why I'm talking about this, but maybe it's... Just because you've got a radio break to film? Yeah, probably. Sharing stuff makes you feel... I say it, and I'm like, well... I'm going to say I'm ashamed, but... I haven't said what the thing is.

But I know what you're talking about. Yeah, do you know what I talk about? So you did this at work? Yeah. And you weren't joking, this actually happened? This actually happened, yeah. Wow. And you're going to talk about it on the radio? I don't really want to admit to this in half-way through the way.

now. I'm like, why did I admit this? So, do you want to say what you think it is? The saying you'll say from time to time? So I literally, the other day when we were filming something and we all jumped around out there, I said, oh my God, I think a little bit of a wee came out. A bit of we come out. And now this embarrassingly happened to me yesterday. Now I came back and I had to voice something with my daughter, Sienna, who, you know, we're doing a podcast to get to come back and voice a promo. And she wanted to go to the bathroom. And I was like, oh, time for the bathroom. And then, so she went to the bathroom.

And then I was waiting for her. And I was like, well, maybe I should go. to the bathroom too. You know, sometimes you're like, take the opportunity now. Yeah, it's a good thing. Yeah, when you've got an opportunity to release, do. Yes, I never regret it. It's Jono's life in a day. He says it, often. You do. If you get the chance to go the bathroom, do, take it. Put that on my gravestone.

I think about you when I'm out and about, and someone's like, did you go to toilet? I thought about that yesterday, and I was like, you know, I will go to the bathroom. Jono would say, go. And I managed to go to the bathroom, come back out and she was still doing whatever she needed to do in there, I don't know, but you know, so I was waiting for her. TikTok dance or something. Probably. Chatting.

Looking at my phone, waiting for her, and my bat was turned towards, it was just out behind you there, Megan, in the four-year area. My bat was turned. Lots of people walking past and stuff, so it wasn't like knowing when she was going to come up. But all of a sudden she came out and just gave me a fright, just a big boo, fright. And I went, oh, and I got the thing. And then, yeah, I didn't say it to see her at the time, but a little bit of wee cab. And just a, just a, and I'm sorry. You just mean toilet.

Me, I know, and I was, I don't know where it came out. Frightened out of you. First time it had ever happened to me in my life. And I was just like, and I didn't say anything. And it just was like, oh, that's uncomfortable. That just happened. That just happened. Was it enough to be like, oh, that's a change?

No, it wasn't a change, Citcho. No, but it wasn't, no. But, yeah, and I thought of you, Megan, because you say it as, you know, when we give you a fright or something happens, you're like, oh, a little bit of a wee came out. And I was like, does it actually happen? Or do you just say it as? No, babes, you're so relatable to so many women who have been through childbirth now.

Yeah. But I haven't, though. That's the embarrassing thing. They've removed a human from their body. Yes, I know. Now I just got a fright for my daughter and pee myself. You would hope your plumbing was still tight enough to... Well, so would I.

And I thought, well, maybe it's because it just been started the process, and my body's like, I don't know. It never happened to me before and hopefully it never will again. But I was just like... This is the moment... This is the moment we get that lucrative Depend sponsorship. I knew it was coming. I know if I reached that stage.

I'm up 12 months. I was like, geez, dear God, this is embarrassing. The show brought to you by a... adult diapers. Didn't say anything to my daughter. Didn't say anything to anyone until this moment right now. And now you're telling the whole country. And again, why am I sharing this?

I don't know why. Let's make you feel better. 4-487 has a little bit of pee come out over the last 24 hours for you. Not today. Not 24 hours. At least give me the last 24 months or something. We'll just do a text poll. A little bit of peeve.

Dude. Oh, it's really... I'd say six months ago, a little bit of pee came. Oh, six months ago. Mine was like a couple of weeks ago. Oh, good. Okay. Anytime I sneeze, can't go on a trampoline.

Oh, really. Lord, no, God, yeah, get a fright, watching a show and something excites you sometimes. Jesus, this is all to look forward to? This is a safe space, mate. 4487. Okay, okay, 4487, please help me out right here this morning. Don't have to go on here, but just make me feel like, you know, I'm part of a club.

A club that no one wants to be part of. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast, the hits. I'm going to be honest, you know, seasoned radio hosts we are. We're heading into this topic, and I'm not. I'm 40% confident on this one. I don't know if we're going to get any calls. Okay, now this is something that a stranger has left you. Yes.

Can either be loaned to you or given to you forever because you've got a great story, Megan. This was thankfully only loaned to me or left with me. We were in a cafe, my husband and I, just the two of us, which never happens. We were child free. And so we're just sitting there having a coffee. And there was a woman opposite us who had a, I think maybe a five-year-old and a baby. baby and a pram and I was like oh my god I've been there how nice is it that we're the ones that are kidless today and she's wrangling and then sorry kids if you're listening to this

they really do love you most and so on and the five-year-old was pulling at the mom and I was like oh yeah I've been there but she needed to go to the toilet and so she's got this baby in a pram and the five-year-old who needs to go a toilet and I've been to the bathrooms in this cafe before very small no room for a pram so she's kind of I can see you're looking around like what to do and she turns to me and she says kind of weird but can I leave my baby with you I'm going to take her to the toilet and I was like what's your name should we meet or did she give a name or she just left the baby I was like yeah that's that's cool did you have any option in this or you felt like this the baby was already with you no baby was

already yeah right she was half and how long would you have had the baby with you sure it was about 10 minutes oh really enough for me to be like is she coming back is she coming back What was going on the toilet? Well, she's wrangling a fireman. And then sometimes when you're in there, you're like, oh, I might go too. Yeah, it's probably a lot going on. Well, she probably did a quick surveillance of the cafe floor. Guy in trench coat, probably not.

Yeah, it's a vaping teenager, no, and she looked at you. She said, old mum-looking lady. Excuse me? She'll do. He'll do. No, he was a withered mum, lady. Very, like, hot-looking woman. Looks responsible.

Yeah, do look responsible. You do. Looking at you, I'm like, that is a responsible person. I would say that. She asked no questions other than like, I don't even think she said hi. She was like, can I leave my baby with you? Okay, so what is a stranger given to you? Maybe it's, you know, it could be an item.

It could be something that have left you in a will. I would love to hear from that. My wife, in America when we're visiting family, she walked up to a lady in the store and she said, excuse me, I love your jacket. Where did you get it from? And she said, you can have it. And she was like, what?

And she was like, yeah, I try and do one nice thing a day. and you can have it. Her name was Felicia. We're like, bye, Felicia. Every time my wife wears the jacket, I'm like, Felicia's jacket. But I was like, crazy, eh? Like just a spark, like a sparkly jacket, yeah.

I say that to people all the time. And it was cold outside too. I was like, Felicia. Felicia has not thought this through. But, yeah, it was really lovely. Maybe Felicia stole it off someone else. She's handing over the bloody evidence.

I was wondering with beepers we left the store, but it didn't. She's just trying it on. Sure you can take them Where's it from, literally that rack? John O'Benn and Megan The podcast The Hits Stranger got you to look after their baby

While they went to the bathroom over the weekend Megan Baby like in a pram little Probably like nine months Old I reckon Like God help me if it would cry or anything Did you like little baby baby baby baby Yeah I did

I tried to interact and get it to smile But it was just staring at me like Who aren't you? Yeah Andrew was like don't you gonna make it cry And then what will we do? Good on you for you doing it.

I really have a choice. Charged for the babysitting services. No, no. Only, I've very briefly looked after people's baby. Sometimes, you know, very irresponsible parents will be like, you know, do you know, Ben have a photo with my baby? And they'll just shove babies in my hands. And, you know, I'm sort of awkwardly holding a baby there.

But all the time I'm thinking, like, one day they're going to go, look, baby, look at who you had a photo with, the baby's going to be like, why did you do that time? Why did you hand me over the first? My favorite is when they hand you a baby and it looks at you and starts crying. Strange boy. Ben? No, they look at me they're like, he's one of us.

Let's go to the phone. Shall we get Ben on from Nathia? Good morning, Ben. Mornina Fana, Mornina. Stranger. What is a stranger loaned you or given you, my friend? So I was the stranger that gave something away. So I lived in Australia a few years ago

and was moving back to New Zealand and I had a vehicle that I no longer needed. So I drove around until I found a a young homeless family and gifted them my car before I moved back Oh, Ben, nice Bloody Oprah Winfrey on the phone here That is... Most people just like put it on

The equivalent of Trade Me, you know? Like, I don't need this, I'll sell it. What was their reaction? Oh, like tears, they were a young family with two kids and, you know, so it was just something to try and pass it on because I had been homeless myself before and struggled with addictions and stuff like that

So it was a little bit of trying to help myself or helping someone else. Yeah, what a lovely thing for you going to do, yeah. Well done even more so on turning your life around as well, mate. Yep, some poor lady's now married to me with two kids. Oh, good on. You're a great human, Ben. Keep up the good work, mate. Have a good one, a good one, and Nartia.

We'll get Kay on. Good morning to you. Hi there. Lovely to have you on. A stranger. Lones you or gave you something, Kay. What was it? So it's pretty hard going off.

to Ben now. Sorry, Dave. No pressure, Kay. Yeah, what are we going to be in first? Oh, yeah. Now, I'm the stranger and I'm the

stranger that left my baby with someone and Megan, no, that wasn't you. Oh, I was going to say. Oh, so you've done the same thing. You must look around and go, well, who looks the most trustworthy? No, 100% yes. And also, you kind of like, kind of

big for help with your eyes. You know, you kind of look around like, is anyone going to connect with me? You're going to connect with me now? Because my toddler, we were McDonald's, and my toddler was absolutely screaming going Mommy I'm going to poop myself and I just couldn't leave my like

I couldn't get my one year old in the stores physically couldn't fit so I just was stuck there looking around for help and this lovely lady kind of volunteered but I could see that she was exceptionally well good on her, good on her what I love it now out of the three of us who would you pick your toddler screaming mommy I'm going to poop

myself you got Megan Ben or Jono what are we going probably Megan honestly guys I'd pick her too I'd have to deal with Jono. He usually has to poop himself and I have to deal with. He's already got a baby to deal with. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast.

The Hits. I know what a stranger gave you, where there is a nice thing. I was just telling you guys, well, that song was playing. Also, when we're going to a sports game in America with some family, one of the family couldn't make it. We had an extra ticket. And there was a guy holding up a sign that's saying, need tickets. And I was like, oh, I'll go up to him and give him my ticket.

And said, here you go, mate, here's a ticket. I don't want anything for it, thinking it would be an amazing moment. He was very indifferent about it. just like oh yeah thanks and then i found it afterwards that apparently some scalpers hold up signs that say need tickets because it doesn't look so suss when they're having like conversations so when people go to he's like oh she just gave us free tickets to a skeleton from the scalp another ticket yeah so really generous it was a lovely heart of gold that's what they said that now producer troy you're in too you tried to uh give loan something they actually give

something to a stranger yeah yeah i went to this really nice dinner it's like a fancy dinner a place called Autolana, fancy Italian. It was a really nice pasta. Had like a, some sort of breadcrumb thing on top. I didn't know half the ingredients that were in it. And I had his leftover box and I was just walking home. I was, oh, I'll do the right thing. Give this to a homeless guy on the street.

He's probably quite hungry. Nice. So I said, hey, mate, would you like some dinner? And he goes, oh, what is it? I'm like, some like lemon chorizo pasta with like a nice crumb. He goes, nah, I'm okay. You got the linguine? They're in Cheney balls.

Those central city ones, they've got fine tastes. Fine tastes. Oh, 800 of what a stranger has lent to you or given you. Nicole, how are you? Yeah, good, mate. How are you? Good. Lovely to have you on.

What a stranger left you or what a stranger loaned to or gave you? Well, they didn't really loan it or give it to me. I kind of just was, I walked into a dairy. The lady there was like, hey, do you mind just waiting here for a minute and watching the shop? And I was like, um, okay. She took off and came back like five minutes later and she'd gone to the toilet. Oh, so you're... Any customers come in?

Oh, yeah, but I just told them to wait. Yeah, you're like... Sorry, this isn't mine. I'm just... You're probably more of a security guard in that situation rather than... We live kind of like in the hood, you know? So she's probably like, oh, you're okay looking. You probably won't rob us.

But then those are the people sometimes you need to be the most suspicious of. People like you, Nicole. I know, right? But I walked away thinking to myself like, no, I've got one of those faces that's like trustworthy. Oh, please. I've always wondered what they do when they need to go wheeze. Yeah, well, they ask random people, and I'm one of them.

Did she see all the blocks of butter you put on your handbag washers? Good on you, Nicole. Have a great one. Cheers, mate. See. Rachel. Morning to you. Good morning.

Great to have you on. She's your ray of sunshine, aren't you, just? Good morning. I love that. So were you the stranger there, given something? or did you give something to a stranger? I was Oprah Winfrey as well. I was on a flight from Cambodia to Vietnam

and the airline had their 25th anniversary and they were giving away a flight and my seat number got pulled out so I won a free flight. And I thought, you know what? I'm already heading that way, so why not gift it to someone else? So meet someone in the backpackers where we ended up

and said, yeah, would you like a free flight? Wow, yeah. That's awesome. How did the person react? He was like, are you sure, is this real? Like, if you just take this bag for me, too? Yeah, it was like one of those situations, isn't it? Did you feel like Oprah, giving away the cars?

Yeah, it was great. It was so good. Oh, good on you, Rachel. Have a great day. You too, thank you. Thanks, mate. One test to go on just sticking on topic, actually, I was flying back to Auckland, and I was in Kuala Lumpur Airport in Malaysia.

Total Stranger came up to me and asked me to look after his duffel bag. I sat there for 10 minutes. There was no sign of him. Then I saw a sign that read, you'll be executed if caught with narcotics. Tell them not to go to rid them in vines. It was a real eyepness. I walked away leaving the bag there,

and then that caused 20 minutes later a whole other set of commotion with everyone going to the unattended bag. Yeah, wow. Never accepted duffel bag. That's the most suspicious of all the luggage, the duffel bag, isn't it? You're right.

John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The hits. I was just mentioning before. Yesterday I was at the park, and a gentleman comes up to me and he hops out of a four-wheel drive but a dusty, dirty four-wheel drive, one that's actually been used, you know.

He's got an army helmet on and an army jacket. And whenever anyone, one thing I've learnt in life, whenever anyone approaches you in an army jacket or any sort of army fatigues outside of the army, you're in for a colourful conversation. So it was quite clearly... Don't you also own one?

He does own one. Yeah, so there you go. I was going to say he did be he wears one. So he's quite clearly not in the army. I don't even know what country flag you're supporting in some war. No, yeah, it was, we put on a YouTube video up and I was wearing it in the debates in the comments section. Oh God, you should definitely know the ended out of that jacket. Yeah, I should.

Still have blood on it. It's quite a political statement. Yeah. I don't know what country I was supporting. I've got like a camo jacket, but that's just from a surf shop. It's not previously used in a war. The Germans didn't do anything crazy, did that? No, no, not that I know of.

Good, yeah. Now they're clean. Yeah, great. So anyway, he starts talking to me. And he's one of these people who's just like, doesn't even give you an introduction, just starts conversation. Just starts firing off stuff. All sorts of what, the vaccine. We covered the vaccine.

Oh, wow. Covered off that. And the whole time he's talking, I'm like, how can I escape this conversation? I must be feeling how people, what they're thinking when I'm talking to them. This guy's like I've found my people. Yeah. Yeah. He's got an army jacket on as well.

And he starts doing that thing that a lot of parents do, listing names of people first and last names as if you should know these people, then going into stories about them. Yeah, yeah. And he's like, Gary Treadin. Yeah, Gary runs the sheet mill factory out in Swanson. And I'm like, I don't know, Gary.

And even when you say, I don't know. They still want to tell you your story, don't they? Plow on with her. Well, his daughter. Yeah, she was the under 18 bare-knuckle fighting champion in Tarapa over the weekend and I could not escape I could not escape this guy

apart from just having to be rude and say listen mate I've got to go you just have to sit there and humour them what is it about your face that attracts these he's an eye contact he looks around you look at it you bring it in you like attract it

you look at everyone slowly you look at everyone's face and Ben and I walk with purpose you meander like you've got nowhere to be you do you give the sense of like this guy's got plenty of time to listen to my stories and he wants to tell stories back so this is great you're right meander at the back of the back and look at people smile and stop is he stopping he's stopping he's stopping he's having a conversation and that's fine I don't might have a conversation

but when you've got places to be we had somewhere to be the other day and I got trapped in reception who was talking about you yeah you just isn't a hi and why yeah you do everyone knows the thing where you say hi how are you but you keep walking like I want to say hi to you but I've got something to do you need to get good at that good advice well yeah well my advice is never lock eyes with anyone in an army jacket and army helmet including yourself

john o ben and megan the podcast my husband Andrew he runs a very tight ship much like I imagine Ben I don't know if he's quite as strict as you but does he write your to-do lists yeah so I said yesterday sometimes I get

I got a to-do to-do list yesterday and I don't mind it I appreciate it he's got tabs on everything and he's like can you get some of these things done today I'm like sure but he's started a new regime which is interesting so every day we've spoken about we're like

ships in the night so at 3.30 I get a call from him and we do our debrief of the day so that when we get home later it can just be less about debriefing and not administration yeah so the 330 call every day is admin but now on his

lunch break he has started giving me another call but the thing is his phone calls are you guys doing a day I know I know and his phone calls now tend to be timed right so he's like I have a window right now of seven minutes and I'm

like okay I like the front footing so he's saying you can make use of that seven minutes of conversation however you wish because sometimes I'll have like a big story I want to tell and then I'll be like how long have we got left and he'll say two minutes and I'll think okay well that story's like doing radio isn't it yeah that story's not going to put into a two minute window yeah and sometimes I'll start something he's like just a

head's up I've got a minute left and I'm like oh I have to pay is this a two minute story you know you need to decide can you make some edits on the fly of the story as top line information and sometimes I'm like no I want I want to panic my way through it I want to eat I just tell the story leisurely this is what he's trying to avoid he's trying to get to the point I'm with you like sometimes like I love chatting to people but I just you know when you just want to just go, what is the purpose of this conversation right now? Sometimes you just need to know that. Especially on the phone.

Yeah. When you dare saying to your wife, though, you've got a minute to get through this. Well, now I'm thinking about it. When the time's up, there'll be like a bang. Sorry, we'll come back to that story at two songs time. I know. So now he's like, he's timing all our conversations before the time runs out. Yeah.

Smart play. I like it because there is a lot of sometimes you feel like, It's like writing that line at the email. I hope it finds you well. Sometimes you just want to get to it. There's a lot of filler and silence on a phone call. You can just kind of sit there on the phone. Some people love that silence and that chat and stuff.

I'm like, all right, we're done. We've done our bit. It's great. We've had fun with whatever. And now we're moving on. You spend all morning with me every day. Am I, do I waffle when I have my stories? No, you keep a pretty tight story going.

Maybe that's why, because I've got someone, my husband's timing me. But every conversation from when your day starts to finishers is structured by the time limit. It is. God. And good on you for sticking this out of it, doesn't it. All right, I'm going to wrap you up there, Megan. I gave you 3.30 for this, and you've got nine seconds left. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast.

The hits. I know we've spent the last week or two getting to know and meeting the robots of the nation, becoming accustomed with AI. And, you know, there's some impressive technology out there. met a robot waiter that is working at the Sedima Hotel, delivers food from the restaurant to the rooms. Goes up in the lift. Yeah, that's pretty impressive.

Wait, how did they call the lift? I missed that. I think there's a receiver in the lift that will come down. Because then I was like, how does it know what floor to go to as well? And again, that's pretty cool. Yeah, the robot talks to the lift. It's quite impressive. I loved it when you, because you guys got to ride it,

and then you guys were chatting to it. And then it's like, I got to go. I got to go. I was very kidding. Megan was talking to it like a dementia patient, weren't you? Yeah. I got a go I want to give you a cuddle

I got to go very cute though it was it was cute and the good thing about it was it wasn't taking anyone's job which is good because that's the fear with AI that one was just to help out

when they got busy yeah yeah so listen I yeah and I the self service check out it's been around for a while now I love the beginning

era of the self service check out where you could just get all sorts of stuff past the scanner couldn't you not that I was doing that but you could

if you wanted to you could expensive produce for less expensive rent. Now there's cameras on it. Yeah, no, yeah. Yeah. Which is good. People used to buy pine nuts and put them through as popcorn kernels. People were doing all sorts of stuff. Yeah. And, well, the supermarkets,

they were onto it. They were onto it. But, yeah, I don't mind self-servicing. I'll self-service till the cows come home, okay? Yeah. I'd probably prefer it over going through the checkout. Yeah. Yeah. But what I have never had one experience, I haven't had one experience where there hasn't been a goddamn

unexpected item in the bagging area. Oh, that's on you now. Every time. I feel like we had that lot at the start maybe, but I feel like I've got my systems. I have it every time. I can't nail it. Oh, I think that's a you problem. Yeah, that's definitely a you problem.

You're getting your sister. You've got to do it systematically. Really? Yeah. Because I'm like, why is it I expected? You're the bagging area. All your roll is to expect items. Yeah.

But it's all, yeah. It lets you know when you can put it, it goes green. Yeah, and then we can take the bag away as well too. Maybe I'm being impatient. You are. I can see, knowing you as a do, you're probably just being way too impatient. Yeah. Do you have to wait after each item?

Well, no, you just make sure it's like... It's in there and it's registered. And then you can take that bag away as well and replace it with a new bag on the way. That's the other thing I can't, because I just pile them all up because I'm scared to remove it. No, you can remove it. You just got again and wait for it to... Go green and say yes. Oh, thanks for explaining that, Sabuna.

It's getting really angry with it yesterday. It's like, you're meant to expect items. How can any item be unexpected in this area? It's what you do is what you were designed for But did you have to have someone come over and clear it for you? Yeah I hate that too That's degrading

It's humiliating And did you have the Depends on there Yes That was made even more yeah I bought Ben some Depends That's probably why I was on high alert as well At the same time As I have any day

To have an unexpected item in the bagging area This is not the day I love that someone out there is like You know Jono from Jono and Ben It's quite leaky And he couldn't work the self-service checkout Two black mum John O'Ben and Megan

The podcast The Hits Big news Obviously during the week Travis Kelsey Taylor Swift got engaged No one was happier than Jason We felt necessary as a team To get together

And send Travis and Taylor A giant congratulations For being engaged Yeah Go ahead around the world Who f*** yeah Let's go Danan

Yeah Jason Kelsey Travis Kelsey's brother That was from their podcar yeah huge news i mean massive news but it's just not not just in the entertainment world it was massive news in the sports world obviously as well

ESPN tweeting about it you had Donald Trump had been talking about it you had our prime minister talking about you had everyone talking about it was the north were wanting them to have a wedding there everyone has been talking about it and we thought we'd try something right now as a social experiment is there anyone in new Zealand that would

not know about it we tried to break the news to our friend enya who is we think the biggest Swift fan in New Zealand, but of course she'd found out already. She's got a shrine. So we want to break the news to some way. Yeah, we tried to like at six o'clock when we arrived at work sort of thing and yeah she'd still, she knew about it. Okay, so each of us

are going to pick, uh, you can text two full 4-8-7 if you think there's a community or someone in New Zealand who wouldn't have heard this news might be your grandparents. My dad, potentially my dad would think... He watches a lot of news-based stuff. Yeah, so he might have crept into that. He probably thinks that Travis Kelsey's like a lawnmower or something, but he...

Don't pivot to your dad. No, well, he won't answer is fine he only turns his phone on to call people you got to call someone you put it out there that you want to call gloryvale glory veil have a landline now what plays into our advantage here is they probably don't have caller ID okay you know this is just a raw dog old school landline okay so this is your attempt to see if you've got someone that doesn't know about the engagement all right johnny can break the news okay johnny you might want this surely this is a sitter good luck okay here we go heading to glory vale on the west coast Hello?

Hello, Gloria Vale, how are you? Good, thank you. It's just, John Obeda and Megan, we're from the hits, the devil's media. We were just frowning to see if you've heard the big news. Not interested, thank you. No, the news, the Taylor Swift news. Oh, mate, you had your chance. You shouldn't have said devil's media.

He said that. You went for a gag, and you didn't get to you. I think you're, because what we were doing was so, it's nice, it's nice. She didn't, yeah. Should I go back again? I'll apologize. Oh, Ben, you go. No, this is Jono's.

This is Jono's. You get an attempt to call someone. I get an attempt to call someone. Okay. Record your message. Oh. Okay. I blew it.

You had your charts. We won't know. We won't know. Okay. Megan, who would you like to call? Let's try my mom. She doesn't have social media. She doesn't listen to music.

She sometimes listens to our radio show. Yeah, it's going to say, sometimes on. She's in, so she might have. Sometimes. She's been very busy this week, you know. Ray, Ray. I think Ray Ray might be across the news.

Yeah, I reckon she might be. Yeah. Yeah, Wayne. Oh, hi, Dad. It's all right. Hi. We were trying to get hold of Mum. John On Ben are here too.

Hi, Waino. How are you? Do you... He went to the by, I don't know, just had a bit of shopping or something, but yeah. Well, try your dad. Try your dad by you there. Do you know who Travis Kelsey is? He's the guy that engaged to.

Yeah, Taylor Swift. Well done. You know, we're trying to find someone that doesn't know about the news. You know about it. Oh, well, you don't hear anything else, do you? Yeah. You're right, Wayne. You can't escape it.

The Prime Minister's onto it. I know, you're right. The Prime Minister is doing messages on it, yeah. He should be fixing the bloody country, Wayne. Have you got any advice for long marriage for Taylor and Travis? Gee, be tolerant, time. Understanding, yeah, I don't know Just be tolerant

He says with a sigh Suck it up Whatever they want Yeah, I'd use the secret Yeah, that's a man He's been married for over 30 years Yeah, it's been a while away day Pick your battles, pick your battles

Let them ferry That's the same thing Good on you, Wayne Wayne's heard about it Good on you All right, Dave Thanks, I'll call you later Someone's text in saying

Try one of the islands, the Chathams, the Stuarts. Okay, well, maybe... Is there a better suggestion, though? 4487 on the text, I've got one shot next, okay? Maybe it's someone in your life. Maybe it's one of the islands. Oh, can I win this one? We'll find out next.

John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The Hats. The big news of the week. Taylor Swift, Travis Kelsey, they are engaged, and it's been everywhere, as we said before. Everyone, politicians, entertainment, sports, everywhere. Some would say too much. Some would say, you know, the old person does say too much.

but we're rolling with it this morning in a bit of a game, a social experiment. Has anyone in the country not heard this news? I tried to call Gloria Vale. Hello. Hello, Gloria Vale. How are you? Good, thank you.

It's just, John Obeda and Megan, we're from the hits, the devil's media. We were just frowning to see if you've heard the big news. Not interested, thank you. No, the news, the Taylor Swift news. Oh, right, you had your chance. You shouldn't have said devil's media. You said devil's media.

gag and you didn't get to you I blew it, I blew it lowbrow gag and it came back to bite me but then Megan you phoned your you tried to call your mum you thought Ray Ray might not have heard of it yeah and got my dad

and he had heard of it yeah he had and he had some marriage advice too for Taylor and Travis gee be tolerant pain understanding yeah I don't know

just be tolerant he says with a sigh suck it up whatever they want Pick your battles, pick your battles Now we've had a lot of text through For my attempt to try and call someone That wouldn't know about it

We've had temples We had people on outward bound courses Which would be great Grandparents Yeah as well but So I'm going to call the Chatham Islands Oh, okay The Waitangi store

Hello? Oh Just takes a little while to connect guys Here we go Okay Very thrust, didn't it? Hi, I'm here store Oh, hi there, it's Jono Ben and Megan

calling from the Devil's Media No, we're calling from the Hits Breakfast At the radio station, how you doing? Not too bad Hey, random call You sound more suspicious In the glory of our lady Random call

We're just trying to find someone That doesn't know about the big news this week Okay, I don't know any big news Okay, okay, so if I said the name Travis Kelsey Would you know the big news around that this week? No Oh, Thaler Swift, Travis Kelsey, you've heard of them?

I've heard of Taylor Swift. Yeah, okay, great. So Taylor Swift, she's been, her boyfriend has been Travis Kelsey. He's a football player. Okay. And they've got engaged this week. Oh, wow. Taylor's getting married.

Yeah. How does that make you feel? Good on it. That's great, eh? It's great, eh? It's great news. I just wanted, I wanted to share that to someone. Everyone had known, so I thought I'd just call, yeah, call,

someone in Chatham Islands? Well, thank you for letting me know. You're welcome. You can spread it around the island. How many people actually live on the island? About 660? Well, can you do us a favour and yell it out now. Taylor Swift's engaged.

Tell the town. No, no, I'm not doing that. I'll just talk it out. Do you know all 600 and whatever? Pretty much. Jesus, everyone up and everyone else's buddy business? Everyone is in everyone. You're not in Taylor's business, though.

Yeah, you don't know Taylor's with us. Well, yeah, clearly not Taylor's. Oh, that's cool. Spread the good word across town. Yeah. Yeah, they will do. What's one thing that anyone should do if they came to Chatham Islands? Like, what's one thing you'd recommend?

Depends what you're into, hunting, fishing, a bit of walking. Oh, yeah. Did you have a concert? Pretty barren out here, there's not much out here, mate. Do you have 660, 660 played Chattermilums once, eh? I think of recently. It was like, can they play... Oh, no, they're coming at the end of the year.

End of the year. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Come get your concert tickets. Yeah. Yeah. have a 600 people there, they're doing something wrong. All right, I want all of Chathamilans

to turn up for that one. I'd say they will be. Yeah, they'll be incredible. Are you selling tickets out of the store there? No, you just get them online. Well, lovely to talk to you. Yeah, they too. Yeah, they have the internet, Tramoh. Hey, well, lovely to talk to you and you passed on the news to everyone else in Chatterm islands. John O'Bennon and Megan, the podcast.

The Hats. With you, we're talking this morning about when you had the opportunity to meet your hero. So many texting calls coming through to us. Yeah, a whole bit. Do you know who my heroes are? Who? Teachers, doctors, nurses.

Oh nice. Solo mothers. Yeah. Okay? None of the superficial celebrity stuff. Oh, he'd under the phone number. Had some really good calls come through this morning. Jack Black, someone saw Jack Black playing Frisbee by himself.

That's a remarkable act. Yeah. Isn't it? Chow! Well, he had to throw it up and then he'd sprint after. He'd catch it. Go for the fitness. Huge cardio workout.

No, he wasn't doing that. Yeah. Yeah, that's what he reckons. Yeah, that's what he reckons. I guess it would kind of, like, if you threw it on the right angle at my boomerang bear, yeah. I'd give you a reason to sprint. Yeah, we've got Sharon with us. Good morning, team.

Good to have you on. You met a hero of yours, did you? I did, I did. I was working at Rugby World Cup in 2011 looking after transportation. The team's the match officials and getting them in and out of all the rugby games. Wow, geez, big job. It was a huge job And I met a huge amount of people

But at North Harbour I was told we have a special guest Had no idea Of who it was And upwalks Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr And at the end of the game We had to get them out

Well I had to get Orlando out of the Arena really quickly And I walked him down to his motor car And we had a long chat Super guy Gave me a hug Hopped in his car and off you end Wow

So what's the light banter you're having with Orlando Bloom? What topics did you cover? Oh, we covered, well, he's not a rugby. He doesn't like rugby at all, but Miranda was obviously supporting Australia. He's like, oh, rugby's a bit mad. She dragged me along this. Absolutely. But then we also covered him during his performing in Wellington and all that.

It was great. He was a really super guy, really interesting and real casual, you know, just a normal. It's a nice normal. Maybe that's why that relationship never worked out. is, so he's like, she keeps dragging me along to rugby games. I'm not really that keen on it. I thought about that one, yeah. Yeah, he's probably like, oh, why don't you just go along?

It's, it's your thing. Hey, good on, you really appreciate you call, Sharon. That was impressive. That's a great pleasure. Thanks. Have a great day, guys. You too. Maybe they didn't need to get him out immediately because of security reasons.

It was just like, he's like, I can't spend another minute. Do any more rugby guys. John O'Benn and Megan, the podcast. The hits. Very embarrassing moment. Friday I was waiting for my daughter Poppy to finish dance and I was in the darkness of my car and just knocking off a series called Shrinking

which is a really good series Jason Segal Harrison Ford It's like a therapist who's basically He's dealing with grief and he's also He's got his patience And it gets to the final episode Okay, I'm watching this in my vehicle And it's everything you want in a final episode

Okay Harrison Ford's hardened character it finally lets his guard down and Seagal's made up with his daughter he's had a tumultuous relationship with the other character, she's patch things up with her mom and I'm like, oh, this is wonderful. You know, and it depends on the time and day,

but it caught me at a vulnerable moment. Yeah, right. And I started crying. I was like, this is a lovely end to this series. You've seen the show? Yeah. Yeah. Did you cry? Yeah, no, I think I did. I think I did cry. Please say no right now.

I mean, I wasn't like bawling, but like water came out of my eyes. Time and play stuff, isn't it? I mean, you started crying during what was there? How to train your drag. How to train your drag. And it just depends on what sort of mood you're in at the time, I think. Yeah. So anyway, tears are streaming down my face.

I'm in the moment. I think I'm in a safe space inside the car. Darkness, too. Then I hear, Gidey, mate. One of the other dads. And I'm like, okay, I've got slightly tinted windows. I can pretend I'm not in here.

Well, I can just ignore him. Two bad options. So then I wind. down the window. I've tried to compose myself. I wind down there was, Ganyay, mate. And he's looking at me. I can tell he sees what I'm going through, what emotional roller coaster I'm in the middle

of. And he's like, hey, you go, mate. Good. And there's a bit of silence. And I was like, I've got to acknowledge it. Yeah, well, otherwise he thinks you've been crying to something else. I think my life's falling to pieces. The wife and kids have left me and I'm living in my car or something. So I'm like, I'm just watching the show. It's really good. And he goes, must

be. I was like, you should catch it. And he sort of started walking away. You should catch us on ample TV. It's called Shriggins really good about the... Well, what did he actually want? He just wanted to say hello. Just fill in, you know, five minutes until the daughters came out. Yeah, yeah.

Nothing more humiliating than being caught sobbing by yourself. Oh, that's okay. I don't think that's shameful. No. Well, it wasn't you. When you cried, was it in the piece of your own home? Yeah. Yeah, I didn't actually watch it in my car.

I think that's more weird. Yeah, maybe that's the thing. John O'Ben and Megan. podcast that now over the weekend i thought uh i had a stalker at the house now this is yeah no i really i leapt from zero to a hundred um because you know last week i was talking about how someone was impersonating me online i don't know why in my head anyway so long story short lover of the rock i love dwayne the rock johnson and my friend luke knows this and he's got a 3d printer and he knows i love the rock and he knows i love puns so he made me and i brought this in um he made me

the rocktopus So it's Dwayne Johnson's head With multiple heads all over And it's the rocktipus And eight legs It's like Medusa And so my wife was at a party The week before that Luke was at

And he was like I couldn't go along Because of work And he's like Oh you need to take this home Give this to Ben And they decided they'd put it in the letterbox For me to find And then get a nice surprise

Rocktopus Yeah I didn't check I didn't check the mail for a whole week. Like this, I just don't check the mail. It's like, no good. Yeah,

or New Zealand Post doesn't bother delivering it. No good comes from the letterbox. But my wife was like, my wife dropped a handle like, No good comes from the letterbox. Oh, you're great, just parking fine. When is good, come from the letterbox? When you ever go to the lid box,

you're like, oh, I'm glad I went there. Never. You are so right. So I didn't go there. My wife during the week is like, she was like, he'd check the mail. I'm like, no, check the mail.

And then later, because I hadn't checked the mail. You're like, no good comes to the letterbox. She was like, oh, look what I found in the letterbox. And all my head was like, that's creepy. That's weird. That's the rock. My wife said, is it? Is it really?

I was like, that's weird. Someone knows where I live. Someone knows I love the rock. And they've turned them into an octopus. Maybe it made me a weird, the rock. A rocktibus. I'm like, this is not good, guys. This is not good.

Lock every window in the house. And my wife is going to go. We're getting some bars installed. I can see a man to look at me like, oh, where is he going with this in my thing. to come back to me going, hey, this is from your friend Luke. He thought it would be kind of funny that. Put in the lower box,

thought you'd get a bit of a laugh out of it. I think you've taken it to a weird place. She's meant to be a bit of a lot. I get a text from my friend, Luke, like, oh, sorry, man, I didn't want to alarm you. I just thought you'd find it funny. I'm like, oh, geez, I've really made this into a weird thing. I'm like, no, it is really funny.

The Octopus is genius. To be honest, your friend Luke made that into a weird thing. A rock head on an octopus. That's starting in a weird place. We're going to get a picture of that up on the hits breakfast. Eight tentacles. It looks pretty legit, though. It does.

Each of the tentacle has another head of the rock. The rhoptopus. It's it made out of plastic or something. It's like vinyl. So I think it's a one of a kind, rocktopus. There you go. That's pretty incredible that that was late like 3D. Yeah, yeah.

But anyway, I thought it was a stalker and I was ready to move home. If you loved one, Dwayne the Rock Johnson, what about nine of his heads? Right there for you, my friend. That's right. Yeah, the rocktibus. Great pun. Thank you.