Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Bionic boobs?!

Episode Date: April 3, 2024

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On today's episode of the Wild Wild Web, a 3D printer printed what? We'll find out next. Welcome to the untamed realm of the World Wide Web. A swirling vortex of weirdness, bullying and self-obsessed social media posts. In this digital jungle, Jono and Vienna are your fearless guides, leading you through the wildest parts of the wild, wild web. This is the wild, wild web. This is the wild, wild web, a special podcast that we do where we find a story that captures our attention from the internet and we talk about it and who knows where the conversation will lead.

This is a real story. Right now, though, if we could just pull back the curtain a little bit, we're in the middle of playing 24 Hours of Handball. We're doing it for Kids Can, raising money for Kids Can. The game Four Square Handball, it's a school year game, but right now it's quite confusing to try and do a podcast and also play. You're playing currently right now,

John. Yes. Is it an international game, Megan? Do you know if it's... Ask us. How did Dad actually know a bit more about this? How did Dad... Now, we're in the middle of our podcast right now, How the Dad. Now, internationally, because you know you've got a lot of international followers,

handball, what is it? What is it called overseas? I put this out on me old TikTok because everyone was getting confused. And I said, look... Don't call it the old TikTok. What do you call it? Handball or Bloomin' Foursquare.

And everyone, 90% of the feedback was Foursquare. And so I posted that this morning. And then all the haters were like, no, no, no, it's handball, all blimmin' foursquare. And everyone, 90% of the feedback was foursquare. And so I posted that this morning, and then all the haters were like, no, no, no, it's handball. See, I know it is foursquare. Yeah, Megan knows it is foursquare. I know it's foursquare, too. We used to play with a lot bigger ball than we're playing. Like a basketball, yeah.

At school, I called it Tiggy, and you called it Tag. Yeah, who calls it Tiggy? I mean, that's on you. That's really Auckland, eh? That is so Auckland. That is like... Tiggy! Let's it Tiggy? I mean, that's on you. That's really Auckland, eh? That's so Auckland. That is like, Tiggy. Let's play Tiggy. Get a Fluffy in an Audi and play some Tiggy.

Yeah, we were drinking bloody, you know, Ness Cafe by the cup loads. You're drinking Lion Red, mate. Yeah. So today's Wild Wild Web, we're just saying we're in the middle of playing handball for 24 hours. Tell people where they can donate. Oh, yeah. Okay, you donate at kidscanball.org.nz. We're trying to raise $350,000, which is very ambitious,

but it will go a long way to helping out a lot of Kiwi kids who need it right now. Yeah, so the Kids Can, if you don't know what it is, it's an organisation that provides breakfast for kids who don't have it. They provide them rain jackets, shoes for those winter months as well. So the money goes to a really good cause. Also, if you just want to make a $3 donation on your phone, just text KIDS to 933. It's real simple to do that. Now, today's story, a man whose hand was crushed by a meat grinder.

So he lost his hand, lost his fingers. It was a pretty horrific accident for the poor guy. But he became the first person just recently to get 3D printed bionic fingers. Oh. So a 3D printer. I need to see the image. Has printed it.

Here he is. He's got a picture right here. I'll show it to you, Megan. For some reason, when I think 3D printed, I still think, wow, of that little plastic. Remember initially when we were doing 3D printing? That looks pretty badass. They're like robot hand fingers.

But it's like black. He looks like a Terminator. Yeah, and he's holding like a coffee cup, drinking away happily. So they're functional. Functioning fingers, yeah. So those fingers could do anything. Bionic fingers, mate. You think of what you could do with bionic fingers.

Stuff I'd get away with with bionic fingers. The things that they could do. How did they attach the robot part to his tendons and stuff? And can that be an arm now? Yeah, it's amazing. I just don't get my head around 3D printers. No, because my dad is heavily invested in technology. He's so obsessed with AI.

He reckons at one point the 3D printer, you'll order your supermarket shopping and it'll print out of your 3D printer. I can't get my head around that, eh? Like, I don't know how I can get... Wait, what? But it's food. I know, I know. Yeah, I know, but that, what? But it's food. I know, I know. Yeah, I know, but that's

John O'Stand too. That's John O'Stand. You know how you need like an ink cartridge for your printer? It's not Elon Musk saying it. I mean, I love you, Dad, but it's not, you know. Yeah. What kind of cartridges are you going to have to buy for your printer though? You're going to have to have like a protein cartridge. You're like, I need my Weebix one.

Oh, I'll get you some Weebix. A I'm going to need to print out some Weebix. A cheese cartridge. Shit, sorry for bringing some content to the podcast. It doesn't do liquid. I'm out of Dilmar tea. I'll just put my Dilmar cartridge in the printer. Do you print liquid? I didn't think I'd just recite a fun fact and I'd just get piled on.

But, you know, it's amazing what you can print out on a 3D printer as well. Penises, penises. You'll be able to print a penis. A bionic one. Exactly. Imagine what that'll do. If you want a bionic one, you can do it. I think you're out, Jono.

Yeah, no, I'm out. Sorry, you're out of the square. You're lingering in the square. Get out. Sorry. Well, okay, you pick a body part. Can't be penis. Damn it.

I've got, I've done that. Megan. What would you put? Damn it. A bionic body part, what would you go for? Like maybe an arm do I need something to be bionic or am I wanting

something to look better just more functional yeah you could have bionic eyes I guess couldn't you well I suppose so yeah

because I like bionic boobies so they're not sagging they shoot out lasers and stuff like that what are you thinking oh my god yes what is that Austin Powers they have little guns in there behave yourself maybe if someone so they're not sagging. They shoot out lasers and stuff like that? What are you thinking? Oh, my God, yes. What is that?

Austin Powers. They have little guns in there. Behave yourself. Pew, pew. Maybe if some pervert's staring at them and they squirt out like water guns. Scramming. Mace.

Mace. No, they have sensors in them to tell when someone's looking. And it's like, pew, pew, pew. Oh, I'm out. I'm out. I'm out. I'm out of the game.

Bionic boobies, that's great. Okay, Ben, what did you go? I'd look at a big bionic arm. Oh, yeah. My arm's been a bit weak at the best of times so if you had an arm that could just crush things your infected elbow you'd replace that arm

so you could do a whole lot with an arm I feel like an arm would be quite practical quite functional today would be great a four square with a bionic arm although it's quite a gentle game

at the best of times how is your elbow doing? how is your sports injury currently? I feel like everyone, I'm sick of talking about it, so I feel conscious about talking about it. Look, you know. The wonderful Sonia Gray, a lot of hosts, is playing with us, playing handball slash four square.

Okay, Sonia, you've got to, you can have one bionic body part. What are you going? Eyes? Eyes. Sonia, yeah. I don't know why. Eyes are a great option. That's a really good option.

Don't tell her I said boobies. I can't. I'm very competitive, Jono. She's my best king. And I can't talk and play at the same time. Shut up, Jono. Hey, Jono, ask her what the Powerball numbers are for Saturday. Oh, yeah.

Do you know that? We've talked about this many times. If Sonia gets sick of us talking about this. But she can play lotto, Megan. What? As the host of lotto. She's not drawing the numbers or anything. No, it's very, what, two, now, Sonia, I've said this many times,

you're in the middle of the game, but two lots of lotto balls each week. Oh, you made her get out. They have two. You're out now. She literally just told me, don't talk to me, I'm very competitive, and then you're out now. I've got her out, but I'm trying to make it. Hang on, time out of the game.

Talking through the lotto functionality, how's it work? So there's two sets of balls and two machines. Two machines for Lotto, two machines for Powerball, and someone tosses a coin before the draw to decide which machines are used and which set of balls are used. And there's a whole lot of other contingency things in there. So, yeah, Sonia's basically out of it. Someone else sort of runs that whole board department.

So, basically, there's no way to rig this thing. Or everything's covered. Trick shot from Wilhelmina. I can buy a ticket, if that's what you're wondering. Have you ever, like, gone, oh, jeez, these are my numbers coming in? Yeah, I have. Once or twice, and I went to that place, which was like, I think this is happening for me. The numbers were mine.

Great live moment. Yeah, live on. She's like, guys, I think I've just won. Cold sweat coming up. Planning ahead to what I would do with $12 million. But yeah, the next three numbers weren't. She's not presenting next week. It'll be a great walkout to it.

And the lotto draw. Here's the results. I've won. Up yours. I'm out. So good. Wouldn't that be amazing? So the answer to my question is no, she can't tell us the lotto numbers.

No. You can't know as well. It's very, I mean, she can't even touch the balls. Wow. Like handball. We're playing handball. You couldn't play handball with the lotto balls. That's for sure.

No, that's right. You can tell Jono's just, no idea what we're talking about. He's playing. The ball was coming towards him. He's No, that's right. You can tell Jono's just chipped back in. No idea what we're talking about. He's playing. The ball was coming towards him. He's like, that's right. Yeah, that's right. Great input.

No idea what we're talking about. It's very confusing while we're playing four-score at the same time. I hope you haven't been discussing Israel and Palestine, and I've just come back and gone, oh, yeah, that's right. Some real controversial views on stuff, and you were like, yeah, well, that's right. I literally don't hear any of that chat. Yeah, it's hard. I see why Sonia just wanted to focus solely on handball.

Well, you did. You did focus entirely on handball because you're right there. Okay, well, we're going to get back to the handball. And if you can donate, I'd really appreciate it. Do you want me to do it? Kidscanball.org. No, I just think I need the bionic eyes to read the screen, but I can just read the screen of how much.

$137,000 donated. I don't think that's right. I think it's more than that. Oh, refresh, refresh. Refresh, refresh. Oh, no, it is right. $137,000. Which is incredible.

On our way to trying to get $350,000 for Kidscan. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. We'll get back to the game. It was very distracting. We're back again with a bit more. Who knows what the podcast is going to be like tomorrow after no sleep. My chances are I reckon we'll forget to do it.

Yeah, I reckon too. We'll see. Just be on me. I'll be fresh. Okay. All right. Sounds good.