Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Costume catastrophe!

Episode Date: March 19, 2024

Ben's embarrassing Sienna again...  Jono and Megans sleepy movie date. We chat with Matt from Drax Project. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Cheers to Dilma, making the world a better tea. Winston Peters, Deputy Prime Minister at the moment, and he's in some sort of a battle with the artist of this song, Chumbawamba, Tub Thumping. It's the song that he used the other day when he came out to make his big press conference, and in the end, I think the former guitarist got contacted from Chumbawamba,

who was the guitarist at the time and he's like oh maybe we didn't say that it was okay to use that song and then Winston's like I don't need your permission so he's like well I'm not advertising anything it's his argument but so it's kind of one of those murky areas

Eminem and the National Party would disagree that was an ad I'm not saying he's right or wrong but he's not using it for in the National Party would disagree. Well, that was an ad. That was an ad. Oh, I see. I'm not saying he's right or wrong, but he's not using it for an ad, so that's what Wilson's trying to say he's doing. He's using it in a... It's advertising himself, though. But yeah, I don't know.

He's saying he got knocked down, he got back up again, you're never going to keep me down. The ideal song for Winnie, too. Who still thinks it's in the top 40 charts. I mean, so have they unleashed a cease and desist on them? Well, I think they've said to stop playing it. I think formally they're going to get a cease and desist today.

I heard someone on the radio yesterday saying it. It was someone a lot smarter than us saying it. It's probably great for both parties. It's great for Winston. He gets talked about. It's great for Chumbawamba. They get talked about. And really, at the end of the day, everyone will move on.

You know? No money will get taken. If only they could cease and desist the hits playing Chumbawamba Tub Something it's a song that you don't like it's the one

you know how everyone's got that one song where I'm like why are we playing this yeah no I get it I get it when was it released yeah

jeez 90 I want to say 98 tell you what doesn't get knocked down that bloody song I just want to play 98. Tell you what doesn't get knocked down, that bloody song. I just want to play it to annoy you now.

Hey, at the time, at the time it was a huge hit. Oh, yeah. It was a massive hit. I don't mind it. Obviously, people still love it as well. It's testing well. 97. Oh, I was close.

It's testing well. It's testing well. 97, but anyway. No offence to Jumbo Wamba. No. Although it was clearly something offensive, isn't it, saying they don't like this song. But Winnie still loves it.

He does. He still loves it. Ideal song for Winston too. Now, you encountered something in your car yesterday. Well, no, it's been there for a while, to be honest. It's a cockroach. Not a big one. Not a big one.

Sort of in between. I'd say a pubescent teenage cockroach. Right. Not baby. No, live. I can't get rid of it because every time I see it, I'd say a pubescent teenage cockroach. Right. Not baby. No, live. I can't get rid of it because every time I see it, it kind of scoots back in between the windscreen and the dash.

Oh, my God. And there was one time I was driving to work. It was before I had COVID. I was on the motorway. The thing was out, so I was on the windscreen clinging on for dear life. All right. And it managed to get, obviously, went in the engine bay, crawls around. Oh, it's obviously liking it there. It's a macaw cockroach.

It's probably nice and warm for the cockroach in the engine bay. The thing that the big rumor about cockroaches, they can survive anything. Outlast anything. A nuclear bomb. Yeah. They can't survive a can of Raid. No, well, true, actually. You're right.

What is that saying about a can of Raid? Or like a foot, you know, that comes down hard on them. They don't seem to survive that too much, but yeah. You need to have a car can of Raid just for like when you see it because it's going to skiddly-dee away again. You know, they survive without food for over a month, cockroaches, yeah? And they can hold their breath for an hour or more underwater.

Like the little mermaids. See? They can survive anything. Except for a can of raisins. Or a foot coming down. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. As I said before, something pretty cool is happening in some ways, but also at the same time, you know,

our alarm bells ringing. Burger King are trialing out new AI as far as the drive-thru goes. So you go up to the store and the AI will take your order for you. No job losses, they're saying, that they'll come out when you go up there. They'll ask you questions. You can change your order. You go through and you're talking to an AI, yeah, like a computer system. How is there no job losses? The person on the drive-thru won't be doing the drive-thru anymore? Well, they have more time to concentrate because they're saying they're just concentrating on the food and getting the food out faster.

Right. We tried this the other day. AI will increasingly replace repetitive jobs, not just for blue-collar work, but a lot of white-collar work. What sort of jobs would be lost to AI? Basically, chauffeurs, truck drivers, anyone who is driving for a living, their jobs will be disrupted more in the 15- to 20-year time frame. And many jobs that seem a little bit complex, chef, waiter, a lot of things will become automated.

We'll have automated stores. There we go. So yeah, essentially a robot will be able to make a burger soon. Yeah, so at the moment they're not doing that particular part. They're just taking your order. It's been used in more than 500 restaurants, the same system across the US, UK and New Zealand. And they've even taught it to speak in a slight kiwi

accent as well as far as it goes what happens good eye welcome to boga can i take your order do you want a wopper yeah like just to slightly get the kiwi accent but yeah it's a pretty pretty wild thing that's happening that guy said that like ai will be taking over like driving people who do driving so what happens when they go to the drive-thru? It's like AI talking to AI. For argument's sake, this is what, you could probably go Uber Eats, pick me up a Wapa from Burger King,

and the car, automated, driverless, would drive to Burger King, go through to talk to another robot, the burger would get made by a robot, and then it would deliver it to your house that's probably not far off well there's already um um my my brother-in-law and he's got a tesla in the states and he had a little function that you you push the button and it parks parks for you like and i was too scared to like when i was driving i was like i'm not gonna use this i can't trust this because i don't want to come back go yeah the thing didn't work and i smashed into a car in america i know your parallel parking skills as well he's like I'm not going to use this. I can't trust this. Because I don't want to come back and go, yeah, the thing didn't work.

And I smash into a car in America. I know your parallel parking skills as well. And he's like, just push the button. It'll do the whole thing. It'll back in and parallel park for you. And I'm like, oh, no. It's just can't. Yeah.

Well, in China, I think they've got driverless trucks. Well, they're certainly testing them. Tesla's testing driverless trucks. Because we have that here, but I don't think it's legal. I don't think it's legal to use that function in New Zealand. There's still a few things that you'd probably want a human eyes to look out for. I know. Every now and then you're like, a Tesla crashed

while the guy was asleep because they put it in auto mode. But how many Teslas are out there, though? You can have a couple. How many car crashes are there a day? And we all focus on the one Tesla that malfunctioned. There's plenty of thousands out there on the roads. Yeah, so there a day. And we all focus on the one Tesla that malfunctioned. There's bloody thousands out there on the roads. Yeah, so there you go. Burger King.

First one to have AI taking over the driver's. This scares me. It sounds like such an old man thing to say. Yeah. The rate that this is moving at. Yeah. Because they get abused a lot, don't they? So now you're just going to be, the computer's just going to be like,

can I take your order? Can I take your, just shush, can I take your order? What are grumpy, pimply teenagers going to do now for part-time work? The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Hey, yesterday, Megan, we're having a conversation for our other podcast that we do. You can check it out at any stage. It's called the Wild Wild Web. We get a news story from the internet, and it's a wild story,

but then the conversation has become quite wild afterwards sometimes. I actually don't know what we were initially talking about. Uh, what? Conspiracy theories, I think. Very deep down the rabbit hole of Kate Middleton. You are in particular, aren't you? That's right. Then we got into conspiracy.

There's a Walt Disney conspiracy theory. Well, there's a rumor that he cryogenically froze himself to thaw himself out in the future and that the Disney Corporation made the movie Frozen so that whenever you Google Disney or Walt Disney Frozen, it came up with the movie Frozen and not articles about his cryogenic freezing. That's the conspiracy theory. Who knows if it's true or not.

I thought it was just general knowledge. I didn't realize it was a theory. I thought he had. I think it's been refuted by the Disney Corporation. Well, they're not going to admit to it, are they? It's like the royal family aren't going to admit to making Kate disappear. We're sitting in butt lift. That's right.

So we were talking about the movie Frozen yesterday, and then, Megan, you had this to say on Frozen. Controversial opinion. That movie sucks. Oh, wow. Really? It's boring. You should have been Ben's heartbreak in real life.

What? Just on multiple levels there. Bang, bang. Couple of kicks to the guts. Jeez, that was... Speaking of Frozen, that got a frosty reception from Ben. One of his favourite movies. We need to isolate that reaction.

What? We spoke about 50 Cent being. What? What? Oh. We spoke about 50 Cent being shot nine times the other day. That was Ben's version shot in the heart. That was heartbreaking. That was heartbreaking.

And you're to blame, Megan. I'm taking advice from the movie that I've watched and loved and I've let it go, Megan. I'm over it now. No, he hasn't because now we're talking

about it on the radio. I know and I see that in the safe space of the podcast because it is an unpopular opinion. It's a really unpopular opinion. I've seen the radio. I know, and I see that in the safe space of the podcast because it is an unpopular opinion. It's a really unpopular opinion.

I've seen the merch. Not even just like, oh, it was okay, but it was like, that sucked. I've tried to re-watch it with my son and he gets bored

and I'm like, you know what, I agree, mate. It's boring. What, three? It takes a lot to get into it. He's hardly a Kate Roger,

is he? He's not a film reviewer. And the parents die right near the start. It's very, you know. It's a little bit confronting at the start, isn't it? Where's the happy times? Well, I thought given your hole you're in with the royal family and Kate Middleton, you would have loved something like Frozen, but clearly not.

Clearly not? No. If we're going to go down unpopular opinions, this is one I heard on Talkback Radio over the weekend. Now, I've certainly reached a certain demograph when I'm agreeing with Talkback Radio callers. And listening to it at the weekend. Here's my unpopular opinion.

Graveyards are a waste of space and resource. We could be building houses. We've got a housing shortage. When was the last time you visited a dead relative in a graveyard? Well, like every time I go to Christchurch, I do. Do you? Yeah, every time I go to North Canterbury, yeah. Okay, so here's my alternative.

The wayward caller on ZB had no alternative, but I thought more about it. Okay, so you don't have graveyards, but if we lean on cremation and then you have a plaque or some sort of memorial at your home on a wall, you know, there's a way to save, like there is acres and hundreds and thousands of acres of just skeletons. We could have houses on top of them.

Unpopular opinion. Yeah, it's a very unpopular opinion. I feel like that's, you know, like, disrespectful to the people that want to be buried. You know? And they'll pay for that spot.

Anyway, they'll pay for that. It's not like, you know, like a house, they'll pay for that bit of land. Well, they're going to hardly, they can't really protest if we build on top of them.

No, but do you want to have a house that's been built on top of? I'm quite happy to be cremated unless I die in like, semi-suspicious circumstances. Then bury me in case I need to be brought back up again. Popular opinions this morning. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast.

Doing unpopular opinions today after Megan scolded the movie Frozen and scolded Ben's heart as well. You know, I just see graveyards potentially a waste of space. You could be building houses on those plots of land. Thousands. And also, in the same breath, golf courses. Like, how many golf courses do you have? Like, we've got a lot of golf courses.

Aren't they often on, like, green belts or something? Golf courses on top of the graveyards. I was like, wow, he's really at the golf courses. No, you can't do that, eh? Because you're walking over the graves. Well, that's how I feel about houses. You couldn't put houses on. Well, listen, it's the graves. Well, that's how I feel about houses. You couldn't put houses on.

Well, listen, it's an unpopular opinion, but that's what the segment is. And Joe, Joe, you believe it's unpopular. Yeah, I do. Talk to me, Joe. Hey, I reckon ghosts, because wouldn't there be some people that are a bit disturbed that are being put down there?

Yeah. And they'll come back and they'll haunt the house. But there's lots of haunted houses in Christchurch and other places of New Zealand. Exactly. If you're worried about that stuff, don't buy a house on top of a graveyard. So they just have to disclose it.

I had to get my house blessed. Did you? Did you? Yeah, I had two black figures. That was really scary. Just like shadows. Yeah, shadows had two black figures. That was really scary. Just like shadows. Yeah, shadows, yeah. My daughter saw it too.

And so what, the blessing, did you get a priest in or something? Yeah, no, I got this man to come around and it worked and he did it. Wow. And you haven't seen them since? No, haven't seen them since. Wow, so you wouldn't be a fan of building on top of graveyards then, Joe? Yeah. No, not really.

Love your work, Joe. You go and have a wonderful Wednesday, okay? You too. All right, there you go. Unpopular opinion for this Wednesday. Yeah, for a Wednesday morning. Way to bring the vibes down, Joe. It's been tough.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Very exciting announcement yesterday drax project the upside album tour it's heading to christchurch and wellington in june and july you can get all the details at the hits.co.nz tickets on sale now they are awesome drax project and joining us right now is matt the drummer from drax good morning morning fellas yeah how are you? We've got Megan joining us for the year 2024 as well. She's here. Hello. How are you?

Huge. Great day. How are you guys doing? We're doing all right. Huge. She's just heard of this news. Obviously a big fan of the show, Maddy, tuning in every morning. Hey, speaking of huge news, Hits are very excited to partner up with Drax Project to

bring you guys to Christchurch in Auckland, June and July. It's going to be epic. Yeah, thanks for that. Yeah, we can't wait. Christchurch shows always go off. I'm not just saying that. There's something different about the South.

It's the Boganism. There's a layer of Bogan. We witnessed it a few weeks ago at Electric Avenue, didn't we? We did. They're ready for a party in Christchurch. Fantastic. Yeah, well, I'm walking the streets of Upper Hutt right now, so I'm well familiar with the Bogan.

And that's probably where we connect so well. Something I was reading about you last night, Matt, that obviously before you guys all became full-time musicians, you were a painter. You and Ben used to paint together. And even at the stage when Woke Up Late was on the radio, you were still painting full-time, painting houses. Yeah, that was pretty cool back in the day.

It's like, when do we throw in the towel when you're hearing your own song like 20 times on the radio during the day while you're working? But I definitely would call it art as well. I'm not going to crap on any painters out there who paint houses because those walls don't paint themselves. And to make them look good, you need to have an element of artistry. You know what I mean?

I would agree. You've definitely had that from a boss sometime in your career. The walls don't paint themselves, mate. Painters make painting look easy. It's bloody tough. It is boring, let's be honest. Yeah, it is tough. Do you drive past houses now still and paint that one?

To be honest, I do. There's only a handful. We did a lot of interiors so I'm not going into people's houses. She's all in the prep though, isn't it? Painting, all preparation. Absolutely. And sort of like Drax Project right now, preparing for our show in Christchurch.

Hey, we're interviewing a professional painter here. You're like, enough about the painting. You've done some amazing things for Drax Project. As we've talked about many times, toured with Ed Sheeran, Camila Cabello, played the national anthem for the All Blacks, and each time I imagine you do

one of these things, you probably learn something different. Someone was saying in one of your interviews that you learned that Ed Sheeran hired all his childhood friends to be his crew which is kind of cool to keep a tight sort of crew yeah yeah um he does that and we talk quite a lot about how lucky we are that there's four of us going through the same stuff doing the same shows we can kind of lean on each other whereas if you're ed sheeran so much pressure on you you're traveling the world huge shows and if you're just by yourself I feel like it could get lonely so I can see why he hired his mates

to be the photographer, the cook, security, stuff like that, yeah. Although, because they're his mates as well, he probably doesn't wield much power over them. No, they'll tell him to piss off probably. It's good, keeps him grounded. What's the best bit of advice you've had from someone

like Ed Sheeran? Something he told us to write as many songs as possible. It's quite a music nerdy thing. Yeah, he's written a lot of songs, obviously. A lot of them don't come out. But to get to the good ones, you need to write for an album of 10 songs. You should have 50 to 60 to choose from. So that was my advice, yeah. It's like kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince, you know?

Oh, well said. There's a song there, actually. There you go, write that one down. It's one of the shitters, though, mate. Yeah, right. One of the frogs. Now, Matt, this is just pulling back the curtain, and we had an idea that we wanted to take you around and get the Guinness World Record for the most amount of gigs played.

It was in 12 hours or something. Yeah, most amount of gigs in towns over the course of 12 hours. So we're still keen to do this. We're just trying to sponsor. We need a sponsor. I mean, you express interest. The band expressed interest. Is the interest still there? Yeah, still very interested. We speak about it and we're kind of like,

is this happening? Have those guys forgotten about it? No, no, no. We'll put it out there're kind of like, is this happening? Have those guys forgotten about it? No, no, no. Have they forgotten about it? We should put it out there on the radio now that if anyone's interested in helping make this happen, we can go from business to business within 12 towns. We just needed some sponsors, some money, because we need to get around the towns. We need to get the equipment higher.

We thought we'd take a flatbed truck or something like that. It could be the stage. Four of us have spoken about kind of what towns to do and how we could actually logistically do it. We might just do it ourselves. Oh, now you're kind of going to say that. Mate, you guys are. I was going to say, though, like, what are Jono and Ben are talking about this,

but, like, what are we doing in this? Drax Project are doing all the hard work. Mate, we're finding sponsors. And we're just, like, going along for the ride. I'll offer Ben's body to many sponsors. No one's interested. Oh, yes, okay, all sponsors. No one's interested. Oh, it is?

Okay, all right. So that's still on the boil, mate. But hey, if you go off and do it on your own, well, you're definitely the important part of that project. Generally, we are super keen to do it, yeah. Oh, good, man. Always, always. More shows have been announced too, 29th of June and 6th of July.

Drax Project are going to be playing Christchurch and at the Power Station in Auckland as well. Matt, as always, an absolute pleasure. You're a true gentleman. I just feel this chat could have done with a bit more house painting content, but there we go. I feel the same. Maybe next time we could try getting into some jib or something. Yeah, good.

Oh, sexy. Yeah, I'd love that. Look after yourself on the mean streets of the hut, mate. Have a good one. Yeah, thanks, mate. The Hits, the. Have a good one. Yeah, thanks, mate. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. It was good to see Kate Middleton out and about in the video,

although Megan's suspicious that it's an old video or it's not even here. Do you know, I have seen that those, okay, so the video shows some Christmas huts in the background, so everyone's like, it's from Christmas time, but someone went to this farm and took a photo and the Christmas huts are still up. Okay. So maybe retracting the fact that it may be a fake. It is a recent video, but is it her?

I don't know. She seems taller than before and she's wearing flats. Yeah, this feels like this is going to pass very quickly. You remember lockdown with Tiger King and all these crime shows and everyone was trying to solve them. And you forget. You forget you move on. And you and those others who are deep in this hole

need to go outside and get some fresh air. Tell you what I did over the weekend. One of my daughters, Sienna, really loves musical theatre. She's joined a company. And now and again, they have small performances they do out and about. Some of them do out and about in the public. And so we went along and watched one of those. It was in like a little town square area with a few people around

and some stalls and some food shops and stuff going on. Is it like an excerpt from a musical that they would do? Yeah, they just do like a collection of songs and stuff. So what musical was it? Oh, they were doing some stuff from High School Musical and Cats and other stuff that they'd done. But then they had a moment as well. So we were kind of watching along where they said, would anyone like to come up and learn the dance oh

jesus now this is for the kids mainly the kids that got lots of lots of young kids as well and then they went any adults oh no no and i was and the lady from the the theater company knows me so she didn't zero in on you and i'm like okay now! And I'm like, okay. Now, I'm not, you know, John, I'm not a dancer, but I'm okay to go up and make an idiot of myself. So I was like, all right, I guess I should. But as I walked up, I sort of caught my daughter seeing his eyes. She's like, end me now. Looking at me.

And I was just like, oh, God, dad is the only dad or parent or adult coming up on stage. And I sort of mouthed to Sienna like, are you okay? John, let me go back. Because I don't want to embarrass her. I mean, I'm all right to embarrass her. It's too late. I'm all right to to Sienna like, are you okay? Do you want me to go back? You know, because I don't want to embarrass her. I mean, I'm all right to embarrass her.

It's too late. I'm all right to embarrass her at home, but out and about. And she actually went, to her credit, she was like, no, all good,

it's fine. And yeah, come on up. And then I had to dance and learn this dance with a whole lot of other kids on stage and I could tell

I was way behind everyone else. And it's, we've had this before. It's not a fun moment remember edge fest a few years ago that was a big concert they had jason gerullo they had all these amazing artists and we had to we were working for the edge at the time and we were talking in between introduced just there to introduce the the big artists keep the crowd hyped yeah sharon who were working with her you know friend of ours she went sharon casey we should all do like a dance

off but she didn't do this backstage she does on stage on the microphone we're working with, who you know, a friend of ours. Sharon Casey. We should all do like a dance off. But she didn't do this backstage. She does it on stage, on the microphone. We're like, you're going way off script here. Sharon is great at an impromptu dance. Who wants to see you run to a dance battle in the stadium?

Yeah. We're like, why are you doing this to us? This was the same moment I had in the weekend. That same fear in my eyes. Where you can see us we're awkward middle aged white men.

Yeah that's why she did it. I think I did the sprinkler and got booed. Because I was like I don't know what to do I'll just do like the sprinkler because I can't do anything else.

Everyone's like Jason Derulo was performing on that stage with his dance moves. He was waiting You did the sprinkler. He was waiting inside the stage

he saw it all. Oh god. He's like this is why I don't have white guys as backup dancers. There's only a few, like Bieber, Timberlake. There's a few white guys, but very exception to the rule as well. Yeah, and we appreciate those white guys.

We appreciate those ones. Stay out of it. You're doing the good work. The rest of us are bringing you down. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We want you to be the hit of Parama's. Jono and Ben podcast. We want you to be the hit-o-potamus. Jono and Ben's mascot race. It's happening for the second time at the mascot race.

About 20 mascots, we're hoping, are going to be on Go Media Stadium. Halftime at the Warriors' big game, big home game, Easter Sunday. If you want to race inside our mascot, the hit-o-potamus, pretty cool. And you get a signed Warriors jersey as well. Let us know your running credentials on 0800THEHITS. Yeah. A lot of great nominations for this. Just a couple of warnings, too.

It's not very breathable, the costume. Heavily, the vision, severely impaired. Kind of like a horse with its blinkers on. You can't see your peripheral. It's not one of those costumes that's got a fan in its head. No, no, no. Oh no, you checked out. Do you realise where we were? We kind of fought

an internal fan system. Give me one of those paper fans that you can sort of fan against yourself afterwards. Yeah, right. One of those ones. Actually, this is without a word of a lie, it was a serious concern last year of people passing out in the costumes because many costumes aren't very breathable

and now we're doubling the length of it anyway we're very concerned, we're making you do it twice unconscious mascots at the finish line Graham, chucking his name in the hat so to speak chucking his foot inside the head eponymous

you're running achievements Graham, what have you done? Oh, I've done a lot. I've done the Rotorua Marathon about four times. Oh, wow. I live in Hawke's Bay in Havelock North, so the Triple Peaks, I've done that three times. Wow, jeez.

This guy's like Forrest Gump. Yeah, right. An extensive running career, Graham. Yes, I've done a fair bit in my lifetime. I'm on track events as well. I was a 400-meter hurdler for quite a few years when I was younger. Were you competitive? Yes. Okay, right.

So where would you come in the hurdles? First. Oh, Graham. I have the certificate and the medal when I was Ooh, Graham. I have the certificate and the medal when I was New Zealand champion in 1988. Oh, so 88.

Let's go back a few years. You were the New Zealand hurdles champion in 88. Okay, well this is, I mean a few years have gone on, you know, a bit of water's gone under the bridge since 88. How's your running now?

What's going on now? It's not there anymore. My knees are shot. Okay. I've had knee surgery. Oh. Why are we even talking to you? That hits just keep on coming.

Well, you asked for credentials. You have a lot of great credentials. Put it this way, the KFC has taken its toll over this. Oh, really? Have you given up running and taken up KFC? Oh, no. Put it this way, I used to go training,

probably run on average 10Ks a day sort of thing. You know, have a couple of days off every now and then. But I used to be that famished. I used to go to KFC and I'd eat the whole 21 piece bucket back in those days. Whoa! Jeez, there we go. You did a whole bucket.

What, halfway through training? No, after training. Well, I suppose you deserve it in some ways. Yeah. Okay, well, so if we're doing the mascot race in 1988,

you're our guy. That'd be me. That'd be him. Would have been great, mate. Well, thanks for your time, mate. You're going to have a great day. Cool, thank you, guys. See ya.

Register now at thehits.co.nz if you do want to take part listen I hate to be the one to say this in 2024 but the hit of

bottomless it's not a one size fits all situation we're going to need to know measurements Ben we reckon it's not a one size

fits all like it's up crutch it goes quite high up I guess you can just wear long socks I reckon

I met like a big tall league player in it last year so, it goes quite high up the crotch. I guess you can just wear long socks, though, I reckon. I met, like, a big tall league player in it last year. Yeah, he was quite tied up the crotch region, wasn't he? Yeah, and it was kind of riding halfway up his legs. As long as you're okay with that, then that's fine. Obviously tall. So we'll need all measurements, heights, and your dietary plans for the next two weeks as well. We'll keep you track of that.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. I went to my first movie with Jono yesterday. Professionally, not personally. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we're still on a professional movie-going basis. So we had to go see a film for work, didn't we? We did. And there's other low-level radio hosts in the studio,

in the movie theater at the same time. And I got there before you, and I opted to sit right up the back like a cool kid. And that's when Jono arrived, and there was so many seats. Yeah. So many seats. It was almost empty.

There was only one other person in there. So two people. I was up the back. The whole row was empty. And Jono's like, hey, comes and sits right next to me. Oh, really? Where else would I sit? Well, you can give him a bit more space, especially because I know what you do in a lot of me. Oh, really? Where else would I sit? Well, you can give him a bit more space,

especially because I know what you do in a lot of movies. Oh, yeah. It is a very sleepy, cosy environment. Tell you what, set the timer on this old man falling asleep. It's like, yeah. So at least you give yourself space to do that. I did feel a bit of, you thought I was, proximity-wise, a little bit too close.

Well, then other people that we know from other radio stations came along and they were like, hi, and I was like, you can sit here and they were like, God no, I'll give you space. And they gave like... Good, good. No, but that's the rules of radio shows. It's not the gangs in New York. You always need some space between them. You're violent. I do find that even when you go to a movie

and it's not that busy and then people come and sit right next to you. And you're like, no one's going to come check tickets. It was a whole cinema, Jono, and you sat right next to you and you're like all these seats no one's going to come check tickets it was a whole cinema Jono and you sat right next to me next time I'll sit

on the other side of the theatre make it more awkward and then yeah there was a little at one point I was like hey

hey you're never going to wake me up Ben's been to movies before he let the old man sleep so you came and sat right next to me and then did a dribbly snore

right next to me the worst worst a dribbly snore. The worst possible place a radio host from Breakfast Radio can go directly after the show is to a dark, cosy movie theatre. Reclined seats. Reclined seats. Yeah. I mean, the movie was absolutely pumping and loud, but you're in a wee nap. Okay, well, listen, I'm sorry for sitting next to you, mate.

Yeah, just a spacer next time. Just a wee, like, space. Sit next to Ben, too, when we go to movies? No, no, but sometimes, you know, it's good to have space, especially when you know he's going to fall asleep. If there's a whole cinema and he came and sat next to you, would you be like... It'd be like a plane if you had your option.

You're like, yeah, it's a mate, you know. Just give me a breather. Get the message. I'll sit in another. I'll tell you what, next time I'll book my own theatre. Okay? Loud and clear. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now I mentioned yesterday, pure coincidence that I had a neighbour in the distance who

was mowing their lawn 10.15 at night. Oh, that's right, yeah. Okay, I now present to you some evidence of what was happening last night. This is 10.32 PM. Have a 10.32pm. Have a listen. Sorry, it's quiet. It is in the distance. That's some late night chainsaw, baby.

That's a chainsaw. Late night chainsaw. Now, chainsawing is... Wow. Chainsawing, to me, I might be approved. Feels like a 9am to 6pm project. It does. Yeah. Like, how urgent is the chainsawing that it needs to get done?

Like, I haven't seen any huge catastrophic weather events recently. The weather's been pretty consistent. Well, so don't chainsaw with just a headlamp. It's dark. That's dangerous. Yeah, dark. Yeah, but go and blindfold a chainsaw. And just the process of that person's day too, okay.

Feed the kids. We've done the dishes. Put the kids to bed. Now it's time to get to the chainsaw. I should have done this earlier, but anyway. I do remember a wild, a wild time at a friend's place when I was little and the parents were having an argument, my friend's parents, about, it was like, you always said there was going to be a walkway

between the kitchen and the lounge and that. And he got out the chainsaw, the dad, and like cut a hole in the wall. Legend. And he was like, now you to be a walkway between the kitchen and the lounge and that. And he got out the chainsaw, the dad, and cut a hole in the wall. Legend. And he was like, now you've got a walkway. And I was just like, wow, this is a boss move. Maybe I'll go home now. I think I'm going to go. I reckon he definitely woke up in a bed by himself the next morning.

Good Lord. And a bed full of regret too. But anyway, I was like, well, there you go. That was a real eye opener. Maybe that's what was happening next door. Exactly. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. In a couple of weeks, we're going to be playing four square or handball,

whatever you call it, for 24 hours. We're raising money for Kids in Need in New Zealand, raising money for Kids Can. And we wanted to know where that money goes, if you can help out, anything at all. Where your money will be going towards, and joining us right now to tell us a little more, can and we wanted to know where that money goes if you can help out anything at all where your money will be going towards and joining us right now to tell us a little more is the principal of Northcote Intermediate School his name is Phil Muir good morning good morning how are you going

we're doing well you know here's the thing I don't know if you encounter this with many other parents Phil as a school principal no matter how old I, whenever I'm talking to a principal, I still feel like a child. So do I. It's all in the air. It's all in the air. Phil's probably half my age and I'm still feeling like a child. Oh, that's the beauty of phones, isn't it? Yeah, that's true.

And now, Phil, you're Northcote Intermediate School. You're the principal there. And how long have you been sort of partnering up with Kids Can? This is the second school I've been at who's had Kids Can supporters. So at Northcote, we have been signed up for about four years. Previously, I was at Manurewa High School for quite some time, and we were in with Kids Can from early on. I think they set up around 2005, around there, something like that.

Because we're doing 24 hours of playing handball, the four-square game, trying to raise money for Kids Can, which is such an important organisation. And we wanted to talk to people like yourself to tell us where people's money will actually be going and what difference it can make to kids. It's huge. Without Ferdinand Kelly, kids just can't think and they can't necessarily moderate their behaviour. It provides a social...

Like, we have a breakfast club that runs every day and the food that we get from kids can. And we will have 30, 40, 50 kids there. But it creates a non-judgmental space where kids who haven't had breakfast will go and talk and eat and feel comfortable in an environment with other people. And it kind of breaks that chain of what may be shame. It's not only the nutrition that you get out of it. It's also the conditions that it sets for students that are less advantaged to be able to perform,

to be able to think, to be able to participate properly. And it's not just the food too. They do shoes, beautiful shoes for students that may not have shoes. And they do the little rain jackets, which are fantastic coming into wintertime.

You know, they're a fantastic charity that just delivers year after year basics that many people take for granted. It must be hard for you, I dare say, as an educator, you got in there because you care about children and the future of children, for you to come in and see kids turning up to school daily without food, without jackets, without shoes. That would be heartbreaking. Yeah, look at this it's it's um they're dead basics really in a

in a country like altair you would take for granted that everybody had access to or was able to provide for and and sometimes it's it may not be money it might be wherewithal it might be that the family is going through you know challenging circumstances job loss or sickness in the family and unfortunately what should be a priority isn't a priority. Other things take over. Survival takes over. Making money to pay for the mortgage may take over or the rent take over. So it's just a stable basic that kids can provide with no judgment and no questions,

and they make it so easy to deliver they're just they're just an absolute game-changing organization have you seen um with the cost of living situation at the moment have you seen an increase in children needing the the services of kids can we we have when we first started breakfast clubs at northates, we were doing two or three a week. Now we're doing five a week and we're getting more students come to them. And I do genuinely believe that there are more students that are experiencing financial hardship and simply need. And they're the last people you want to be affected by financial hardship as well.

Absolutely. Our children are our future and we need to be doing everything we can to provide the best for them in those really important developmental years. Well Phil, thank you so much for giving us more of an insight to what Kids Can can do on a day-to-day basis at your school and we'll try and keep that in mind through some of those painful periods where we're playing handball through maybe two o'clock in the morning to four o'clock in the morning. Handball is the best. So go hard and if you need

some impact players, we'll have a whole lot that'll come over and give you some motivation or give you a run for your money. Now if you were going to give an engagement report to this interview, Phil, how do we score? What scale do you want? Do you want a 1 to 4?

I would have been happy with a certificate of merit. Yeah, exactly. I would give you a golden wristband. A golden wristband. Good idea, Phil. You keep up the good work. And thank you for enlightening us on what kids can and the money actually goes towards.

Appreciate it. Absolutely. You're welcome. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We like to do this from time to time, sexy texties. And we'd like you to get involved as well, 0800 THE HITS, 4487 on the text. If you've got any mundane text messages

that you've been sending back and forth with your loved ones, just like to spice things up. We're not looking for actual sexy texts, right? We're just looking for the real mundane stuff that you send back and forth. And then we'll try and make it sound a little sexier well speak for yourself ben boys all right well like uh like anything we'll take any text just one text would be great four eight seven uh hit the music there we go you're gonna

kick things off yeah i could kick things off now as you know it's been a wild uh couple of weeks for me um with my um arm that i'm probably you guys are probably sick of me talking about so i'm trying to avoid talking about you know that but i've done some weird things over the last couple of weeks including making quiche for the first time in my life and you've been nursed back to health yeah so i got frustrated that there was a whole lot of food because i hadn't been doing the regular cooking at night and stuff because my wife works and i was like i need to use up a whole lot of this food what can i do i'll make a quiche how did the quiche go it actually turned out really good.

Love them. It turned out really, really good. I could see why the boomers do it. It's actually really easy to make. Yeah. It's delicious. And so anyway, the reason I'm telling you this story is my sexy texts relate to the quiche. My wife, Amanda, took it to work the next day.

Oh, you were like, oh, I thought it was when you were cooking it just in an apron or something. No, so I get a text from my wife. Oh, sexy stuff. She says, were cooking it just in an apron or something. No, so I get a text from my wife. Oh, sexy stuff. She says, the quiche is mean, real yummy. And I replied, oh, nice. So there's our correspondence on the quiche. But yeah, I was good. I was pleased.

I was pleased it was good. Nothing screams foreplay like a quiche. Yeah, exactly. I feel like she was almost trying to make it, see? Yeah, she did really yummy. Yeah, true, really yummy. And you're like, cool. I was like, oh, yeah, nice. You played it off, she did really yummy. Yeah, true, really yummy. You were like, cool. Yeah, nice.

You played it off, man. It was a signal, my friend. That's right. All right, mine's also food related. Okay. Yeah, it's a lot of admin in our household getting dinner made. So I said, could we have green curry instead of red? We don't have red curry paste.

He said, yep. And I said, white or brown rice? He said, white. I know. A lot of your comms just end up in the chore zone, don't they? Yeah, they do. Just reminders and just, yeah, chore-related stuff. What's it going to be like when the kids leave home?

Probably still the same. You'll still be doing that sort of stuff. I'll be making more quiche. Quiche I'll make. Jeez. All the quiche I'll make. Well, Ben, I hate to admit this publicly, but things got a little spicy with my mum.

A little saucy with Annie Pryor. Oh, you've got to bring your mum into the relationship. I'm going to bring my mum into it. They've thought about bringing family members into the Sex and Text. No, because that's called something else. Well, she's had my friend Ben on her mind. Oh, me. And hasn't been able to stop thinking about Ben.

If we can take it back to the beginning of this conversation. Annie, I heard Ben's elbows infected. I said, yeah, no good. Poor guy's been on a drip. Annie then came in and said, is it weeping? I said, Annie, I don't know if it's weeping. She said, if it's weeping, that's not good. Have you seen it? Does it look weepy?

I said again, I don't know if it's weeping. Annie said, well, tell him if it's weeping, that's not good. He'll need to get that seen to. I said, he's getting it seen to. People, there's medical professionals looking at it. Constantly being seen to. Annie said,'s getting it seen to. People, there's medical professionals looking at him. Constantly being seen to. Annie said they might need to drain it. He said I'll pass that information on.

So that was day one. Well Talias has been weeping but I have been seeing professionals. Is there more? 24 hours later she came back. You're still on her mind. Did you ask Ben if it was weeping? I said no sorry I've been at home with COVID. I haven't spoken to him. Annie he'll be in big trouble if it's weeping. Wait where was the, sorry, I've been at home with COVID. I haven't spoken to him.

Annie, he'll be in big trouble if it's weeping. Wait, where was the concern for her son when he has COVID? At no point was it acknowledged in my current health scare. I'm worried about my weeping arm. Yeah, well, it has been weeping. Yeah, and again,

I said, listen, the medical professionals have his elbow covered, Annie. And I haven't heard anything since on that. So she's found something more interesting to occupy her mind. Why don't you give Annie Ben's number and she can get direct comms?

Yeah, maybe you can send her some pics. Slide her to Annie's DMs with the elbow. Do some sexy textings to her. She wants some pictures of my elbow. Tweeping. You like that? That's an OnlyFans account. Weepy elbow.

I don't know if there's a market for it. That's for sure. The Hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. We want you to be the hero part of us. the elbow. I don't know if there's a market for it, that's for sure. It's happening again for the second time. Last year we had a mascot race at the Warriors at halftime. Next Sunday, Easter Sunday, it's going to be there happening again. About 20 mascots. You could be racing inside our hippopotamus costume.

Yeah, and if you want to put your business's mascot forward for the halftime race at the Warriors, the second annual halftime race that we've done there, you can text 4487. Yesterday, Roly from the toilet paper commercial has been put forward. Hey, hey, Roly. Roly, hang on.

Like you said, Ben, toilet trained, ideal for running onto Go Media Stadium's field. And if anything does happen, can wipe up any of the contestants. Well, because that is a concern. The things can go wrong. It's like, yes, it's fun to do this mascot race, but the important thing is the Warriors game. So things can go wrong, particularly with costumes. And you want to be in and out because they're just going to run out for the second half

and they don't wait for anything because they've got the TV coverage. Yeah. If Rowley's still on there picking up droppings from the other contestants, then they're just going to m out for the second half, and they don't wait for anything because they've got the TV coverage. Yeah. If Rowley's still on there picking up droppings from the other contestants, then they're just going to mow right over Rowley. That's because we need to get out in time. And the non-breathable costumes, the polyester costumes, the foam costumes, they really heat up. And when you're running one length, last year people started to get lightheaded,

the athletes, didn't they? And we had to get helmets off pretty quickly. Yeah, true. And now we're making them do two laps. So, Ben, we could have – So you heard their pleas last year and you're doubling it. We're doubling it, doubling down. So we could have a line of unconscious contestants at the end.

But costumes, you can't have catastrophes with them, can't you? Victoria joins us on 800 The Hats. Good morning. Morning. Costumes going wrong, things can happen. What happened to you? Oh, God. I've never lived this down.

So I was meant to be going to a bee party, but I thought it was a V party. Right. B party, but I thought it was a V party. And I thought that I'd be really smart and I designed Andrew's top as a vagina. Even just V, that's where your mind went to first. Like you've got vegetables.

You could have been Victoria Beckham for namesake. How come that was the first stop? Because everyone thought I was kind of straight-laced, so I thought I'd show them. You showed them, and you definitely did show them. So you turn up, you turn up to a bee, bee themed party as a vagina. So lots of people dressed as, I imagine, all sorts of bee related costumes, and then all of a sudden you turn up. What's everyone saying?

They just all stop. Like, you know, when the room just goes completely dead. Did you change the name to something starting with B? Yeah. A beaver party. I ended up with that. Yeah.

But then you're like, well, she definitely isn't straight laced. This is a B party and she's turned up as something as a V and the most offensive thing it was a kids party too oh so good

I appreciate you sharing that with us Victoria you have a great day thanks guys so see you man the hits the Jono and Ben podcast

Jono and Ben are the dragons and this is Dragons Ben. We've got a $10,000 business startup package, thanks to Square One, that you could win if you're a kid with a big idea. Now, Square One is a great app that gives kids the financial head start they need. You can find it at the App Store and on Google Play. And this is an amazing price, $10,000 for a big business idea.

Yeah, Square One card, you basically can load money onto it, the kids can earn money on it, set goals for stuff they want to buy as well, and you can control their spending too. Jeez, we've had some amazing little business ideas so far. These kids, they were little Donald Trumps, aren't they? Want to

grow up to be like their business mentor Donald Trump. That's not you, Tim. That's a better comparison, I think. Mila and Ella. It's a mystery slime. It's a special recipe that we cannot tell anybody. Sold over 200 units in a month of that slime. Jack, who's been extracting the urine from worms. Selling worm wee.

They just pee. And then it goes down into this little container. Great for the garden. Yeah, apparently. And we've got another one today that's great for the garden, apparently. Elise, welcome to Dragons, Ben. You need to pitch your business idea.

And Ben Boyce will lack the confidence to make any decision as to whether your idea is any good or not, okay? So good luck. So I was going for a walk on the beach, and I saw all this seaweed because it was just after a storm. And I got inspired after my mum told me that there was something you could make called seaweed plant food, which is really good for the nutrients in the plants. And I've done some testing because this is now what I make at Bloomin' Blood,

which is my business name, on tomato plants. And the ones with my seaweed brew have got so much healthier and they're so much stronger and bigger than the ones just using water. How old are you? I'm 12. Jeez. Do you know what? My grandparents, when they were alive, they lived in North Canterbury, Amberley Beach. And it was about 2km from the beach.

And my grandma had an amazing garden. And her secret, she said, was seaweed. She would make us all drag seaweed back 2km from the beach and then put it in the garden. And that's what she said made her garden just incredible. So I think you're onto something here. It's a great gift for Mother's Day. And what 40-year-old woman doesn't love plants? Hey, you've nailed me.

Yes, absolutely. What would you be seeing right now, Megan? Would you like a bottle of seaweed gunk for your 40th? I mean, I feel like there could be other presents as well, but I wouldn't turn it down, that's for sure. So what would you do with this $10,000 package from Square One? What would you like to do with your business? I would probably invest it into a market still and getting it into the shops around Taranaki where I live. And saving for uni would also so I can study my dream major.

And I would like to buy a big jug that I can put some of my plant food in. So when I'm selling at market, people who have bought before can come back and refill their old bottles. Smart. Smart. That's so smart. You should retire from school and just start earning money. What's your dream?

What do you want to study? I really want to study education, so I want to teach at primary school level. I feel like that should have been business. And so how much of the seaweed fertiliser have you sold? Before I started making proper commercial in my little glass bottles, I was selling in milk jugs to friends and family, but I didn't sell many of those. So we've decided to go on a more professional approach

and I've sold maybe 10 with this new format. And what's your price point, Elise? How much for a bottle? $15 for a 200ml bottle. Nice. Elise, you're really switched on. We're all very impressed. What's the name of your business again?

Bloom and Bud. Bloom and Bud. Okay. This $10,000 business startup package would really send you into the stratosphere. My only hesitation with this competition, if we look back in 20 years and we go, damn, we launched the next Microsoft or Tesla or Amazon, and we're not getting a slice of any of this pie.

Yeah, true. Elise in 20 years is going to be a billionaire. She's going to be one of those crazy ones that's flying people around space in their homemade spaceships. You want her to promise that she's going to buy you a car if going to be a billionaire. She's going to be one of those crazy ones that's flying people around space in their homemade spaceships. You want her to promise that she's going to buy you a car if she turns into a billionaire? We don't want anything big. Let's say a 7% cut of total earnings.

Okay, Elise? Sounds good, Jonah. Sounds good. Don't agree to anything. No, no, no. Elise, no. Did you agree to it? No.

Elise, it's so lovely talking to you. Good luck. It's an amazing business idea, and I feel like you're going to go very far in life. Thank you.