Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Could Megan Pilot a Crashing Plane? | FULL SHOW

Episode Date: June 2, 2026

On today’s show: Jono's dream about a plane crashing with the whole show on it! Why Megan hasn’t been to the dentist in nine years... Ridiculous ACC injury stories  Being publicly called out over loudspeakers Ben tried out Megan's weird relaxation trend... Shower habits and the “self‑squeegee” debate Debating the best fruit (including strong persimmon opinions) Why Jono procrastinated something for five years! Join the Itty Bitty Hitty Committee HERE!Instagram:  @THEHITSBREAKFASTFacebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono, Ben & MeganSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Jono Ben and Megan podcast, thanks to Dilma. Goodness really does taste great. Dilma, making the world a better tea. Turn of rum and raisin ice cream. Jono, you'll be happier. You're the only people I know that like rum and raisin. It's not a retirement home. I love rum and raisin.

Honestly, it really gets a hard time and it gets stereotyped into the older demographics of the ice cream liquor. But, oh, geez, it was a great flavour. I don't mind the rum, but, like, can we put, like, chocolate chips? Like, why does it have to be raisin? Just ice cream is just weird. The combination works. If you want to do stuff with your ice cream you can, just leave rum and raisin to be. A rum and chocolate.

I won't judge you then. God, man, speaking of being old, I really, I had a crazy sleep yesterday after. I was telling you about it last night, Ben. Just a 20 minute nod off, doze off. A good car sleep. A bit of a car sleep. A bit of a rum and raisin. Oh, geez, listen to the show.

What is the show? And I fell asleep, and I had this dream that the three of us, were in a cargo plane and all of a sudden Ben goes, the engines just stopped working and it was silence and the plane was going down. And I jumped in the pilot seat. Well, this is what I was thinking that was, because we had a conversation. Yesterday. Yeah, yesterday about how you would love to step up in that situation.

So maybe that was ingrained in your mind. Did I land it? No, you didn't see. You panicked. You panicked. We all panicked. We all screamed, as we would do, like, I'm not trusting you to jump in the cockpit. The engines aren't working.

What are you going to do? No. What's your game player? You're like, someone I'll talk me through it. No, I reckon I would I just have a feeling I would like feel it out. I know there's lots of buttons and stuff. I don't think that's how

piloting works. You can't just feel it out. I'm very complicated, I'm sure. Can I not talk to it? I'll be like, yo, Victor Charlie Charlie, this is Roger Dash, blah blah blah. It was honestly to wake up to that. It was really and I was a salivary sleep as well. I'd been drooling so I'd kind of been like so much saliva I'd been trying to waterboard myself. Did we hit the ground?

No, I woke up, I woke up. And I was like, what is this a metaphor for? Well, yeah. So you know, I landed it. No, no, no. Stop saying you weren't the hero in my dream. It was my dream. I was there.

So I was like, yeah, Megan wants to make us of the hero. I landed it. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. That's. Megan's mouth, hot topic of discussion. Just mentioned in passing, hasn't been to the dentist in nine years. That's a great run. Yeah, it's been a while.

I went to the dentist just before I got married. That's how I know. nine years ago and then before that probably 13 years so it's like not getting a lot of yeah but you don't you know your oral hygiene hasn't slipped by any stretch of there but three times a day you're brushing yeah and I floss probably three times a week I could do that more um and what else that's that's about it we just want to know these teeth just you know clinging on to life dangling there in the gums so we want to take you for a check-up now we did ask you know were any dental professionals listening to the program brave enough to do that to put their hand forward

to put their rubber glove on that hand. Are they brave? I should be, I'm the brave one. Nine years of nothing, you know? Who knows what you're going to find? It's like one of those hoarding shows, you know, where they turn up. Oh, my gosh. Look at all that stuff that's here.

Jeez. Open up the garage. What's flying out of it? Francesca, welcome. From the dental industry. It's good to have you on. Thanks, guys. It's good to be here.

You brave enough to do this? This is a job that I wouldn't be doing. Shut up. No, I agree with Megan. She's the brave one. It does take a lot of courage to come in. Now, is nine years the longest... How long have you been a dentist for, Francesca?

Okay, so in all honesty, I'm in my second year of dentistry, but I am well and truly fully qualified. Megan, it is not the longest that I've seen someone not come to the dentist. In actual honesty, my dad hadn't been for about 14 years, and he decided to wait until I became a dentist. I'm in C one again. And how are his teeth? His teeth were good, yeah.

I mean, I've been coaching him for sure. Sounds like she's got a pretty good track record. You know, like your kids keeping up your brushing, three times a day and some pretty regular flossing. So things hopefully aren't too bad. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's pretty impossible to be perfect with the oral hydrant. I'm probably three times a week with my flossing as well.

So that's good to know. It's pretty good. Let's talk worst case scenario. That's what we want. Also, the reason I haven't been, Francesca, is because nothing like is sensitive and nothing hurts. So is that a good sign? Well, not necessarily. There are some things that, you know, can be lurking.

But, I mean, in general, no pain and sensitivity is a good thing. Sometimes, though, you know, we definitely recommend going and seeing a hygienist and getting a gum cleaning every sip. months just because there can be bacteria and stuff that doesn't necessarily hurt, but it's good to get rid of. And that's good for your general health, not just your oral health. Okay, so your major concern is filling. So is there a world where Megan could require multiple fillings and not feel anything? Potentially. Some people just don't have sensitive teeth.

But that's not necessarily to freak you out because sometimes, you know, generally you would feel if there was some sort of an issue. Okay. Well, Francesca, I know you're new to radio, but radio's main job is to freak people out. We just did it with the petrol prices recently. That pulled us a few or three minutes. No, I want her to promise, like, I will let you into my mouth.

Consensually. Not to, like, fake fillings for the pleasure of these guys. No, you've got to be legit about it. Yeah, like, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, no. I have to be real for my, the state of my profession. as well. She's not in it for the game.

That's right. Her boss, the tooth fairy is not going to like that, all right? It doesn't very much from me. Why don't we give your dental surgery a bit of a shout out and we'll come and visit you? Cool, yes. So I'm at City Dental Lounge,

which is right in the Auckland CBD and we're just across from Commercial Bay. So if anyone is looking for a dentist, we absolutely had some appointments available. Gosh, that sounds fancy. I'll go to a lounge. Sign me. A massage chair, Megan, and we've got headphones and a TV on the road.

Are those one of those cool glasses? They make you wear that feel like they're from the service station? I want her in those as well too. All right. We'll try and come see you next week and we'll see how things go. John O'Ben and Megan. The podcast. The Hats.

Talking about this yesterday is Jono injured himself walking. Yeah, neck injury. Walking. It wasn't even skydiving. It wasn't moving a fridge. It was just sort of basic human. movement and a little embarrassed at the physio to have to lodge that ACC claim. Embarrass to go to the physio, too.

I literally would have come up with a better story. Yeah, but it was just sort of participating and moving forward. Like, I wasn't doing anything exciting. You didn't even like looking at anything. No. Not the only one, though. And that's a good thing for you. And not a great thing for them, but people are sharing their stories of injuring themselves on pretty lame things.

Yeah, Georgina joins us. Welcome, ACC Claims, mate. Hello. Good to have you on. We're talking lamest ACC Claims. Yeah, I've got a good one. What did you do? I put my neck out just brushing my teeth.

That is a beauty. How vigorously are you brushing them? Just the normal way you brush your teeth and I must have just moved my neck in a very weird way and then couldn't move my neck at all. Oh, my goodness. It was a very lame filling in the ACC form and ask you, how did you do it?

I'm like brushing them with that. It's something you had done like hundreds of times. Yeah, where were you at home? What time of the day? It couldn't be less exciting if we try. I mean, unless you use it, there's a little bit of neck and brushing your teeth. Not much, really. Not really.

You just really meant to move the toothbrush around your teeth. Yeah, yeah. And ACC accepted that claim? They did, they did actually. There's hope for you. Yeah, well, someone didn't get, they got denied for sneezing and cracking their ribs. So if you got your toothbrushing one across the line, I have hope that my walking neck injury will be paid out.

I'll cross fingers and toes. Not too hard, though. You don't want to put your neck out. Have a good one, mate. Great text, yeah. Bye. 4487 on the text. I broke my hand, putting my pyjama pants on.

Fell out of bed and broke my leg. Oh, jeez. There's some beauties. Maggie, lamest ACC claims. What happened? Falling on alpac kapu. And, yeah, being chased by an alpac.

stud and yeah so okay so let's just backtrack a bit on an alpaca farm i'm gathering yeah yeah alpaca farm in wikato um the stud got out was chasing the other alpacas and we did a bit of a you know round up trying to and unfortunately the um the stud started running towards me and i tried to escape and slipped on alpacapoo and landed pretty solid on my back oh oh Is alpacaboo is slippery? I don't know. I don't know what's... Well, at that point it was.

Yeah, right. Oh, grim. It's like a banana peel, same sort of texture. Yeah, yeah. What did you do to your back? Well, I landed pretty solid, and I had to go to A&E, because, you know, the whole vibration of, you know, landing on your back.

It actually, they did x-rays, and it was just a bit of spraying, and all of that on my wrists and my knees and joints and all that being, you know, a little bit older in age and that. But it actually found that I had arthritis in my spine from probably a previous injury maybe seven, eight years ago from falling on the bathtub when the kids had over sprayed excitedly in the bathroom. And I went in and slipped on the bathtub from them spraying probably when they had done too much pooing in their bathroom.

Oh, it's surrounding you. The old feces, laid in claims. You can keep these coming through, 4487. There's a couple here, though. I want to remain nameless. Nameless. Did I try and correct nameless and then said nameless the wrong way?

I think so, yeah. I was going to let you have it. Thank you. But they were getting intimate, and things took a turn for the worse, which resulted in them being joint together. Wow. And having to make a claim and call the emergency services.

Not what you want. No, wait, I've got more questions. I know you do. But 743 in the morning's not the time to ask. Not going to happen, Megan. Join it together. John O'Benn and Megan, the podcast. The Hits.

Thanks for hanging out with us. On a Wednesday, we're going to a conference today. Feels like such an adult when you say you're going to a conference. Do you reckon there'll be lanyards? I like a conference lanyard to make you look official. I don't know if there will be. It's just the hits team, so I feel like. Sometimes we get pens.

Yeah, it's right. Notepads. This is the same conference at last year, John, I fell asleep in. I know. We'll see how you go. He's like, nothing makes you feel like an adult. He was supposed to sleep in these things. Yeah.

You're also, your head was doing that. No. And everyone just wanted to laugh. He goes to sleep. Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, it was really good information that was being handed out. Yeah, no, don't. I promise that if he does it, I will video it today.

Yeah, we'll video. No, please don't. Yeah, there we go. Please don't. So, yes. Today was heading back after we were actually filming, giving away some money for the 50K payday at the petrol station. There's a bus sort of terminal near where we work and, you know, multiple buses that travel up and down the country. So there's, you know, a few passengers for them to manage and maintain on the sidewalk there.

Now, there was a poor guy. He was kind of wandering on the road of where the buses are, but there was no bus in the way or anything. And he didn't seem like he's in harm's way. but then over the loud speaker excuse me excuse me and then you when you're that person

you don't know that that's for you at that point no so it takes a few seconds or a few moments for you to realise the message is coming to you and so he's wandering around excuse me sir sir sir and then he's like oh oh oh

this is me and you don't know where the voice is coming from either it's that awkward look around you're like looking around you're not allowed to be walking there don't walk in there get off get off And then he kind of goes to walk off in one direction. Wrong way, wrong way, turn around, turn around.

And everyone's running commentary. Oh, I felt sorry for the poor fellow. Hate being called out on a loud speaker. Oh, yeah. Don't you? Even like your dad who thrives at the airport, Megan. Yeah, so when he goes to the airport, he's very obnoxious. He waits until everyone's boarded and then they call his name.

Because he's like, makes me feel special. But then I don't have to wait in line. Everyone looks at your life. I know. I know, I know. And then if you're with him, you've got to wait or I always just go on without him. There's no place to put bags at that stage as well, too. Yeah.

So waiting, that is while waiting to your name's called to board. Yeah. He feels like it's a personal invitation. Yeah. Like that's a last resort for the airline staff too. They're like, where is this got? And always, you sit on the plane and you're like, how has someone checked it? Yeah.

And then in between checking in and boarding the plane got themselves into such a fluster that they've gotten to board the plane. Yeah. And then he gets on and everyone's like, course it's an old white guy. Of course it is. So this is what we want to open up on a Wednesday morning.

Have you had a shout out on a loud speaker, you know, in a department store? The only time I can remember it happening was also at an airport, but it was JFK, like a huge airport. And I was trying to get on a little, what do you call,

domestic plane. And I'd come from New Zealand and it was so far away. And they were calling out my name. over the big JFK speakers that my plane was about to depart and everyone was waiting for me. He felt very passive aggressive. They literally said everyone is waiting on the plane for you. Less passive, just more aggressive.

Just like get your ass on the plane. So it was like a movie. I was running through JFK. Were you? You're like, you don't run in heels. You'd be proud of me. I had heels on and I was running. Wow, okay.

What's the feeling when you walk onto that plane last person? Everyone was pissed. Yeah. It's not a place you want to be. Everyone was staring at me. All right. So have you been called out over the loud speaker? I mean, you know, what have you been called out for?

Maybe it was a good thing. Yeah. It doesn't seem to be a good thing. You know, fair public fears at the beach. Kmart. Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The morning.

I want to know, have you ever been called out over a loud speaker? Megan and I were just remembering that this workplace used to have, back in the day, used to have a loud speaker. Yeah, a long time ago, at reception. So they would call people and then they'd tell you Sometimes if there was free food at reception. Or you could buy sushi. Sushi at reception.

It's like the voice of God. Oh, really? You want to go up and buy sushi? Sometimes you'd be stupid and call up and be like, say something about Ben and then they'd do it over the loudspeaker. They said it. Maybe that's why they got rid of it. Risky maneuver having a loud speaker in a radio station too.

Your mum's here to bring you your lunch. Oh, shame. She's for nefarious purposes. And then that got replaced by the group email. Yeah. Yeah, true, actually. You're right. RIP to the office speaker.

I remember we were on holiday and I was at the beach and I hadn't noticed that there were flags set up. So I just mowed straight out. This is on the Gold Coast. I just mowed straight out to the ocean. My big bald squidgy body soaking in the ocean, having the time of my life. And then you hear,

yeah, you know, the black shorts, black shorts. Again, like the person I was telling about the bus terminal, you don't think it's for you. And then eventually you realize, oh, this is a very specific description. You're bald man Yeah I was going to say black shorts is pretty common Do they have to like

Whittle the description down I mean that you can tell they probably didn't want to Profile Very white Very white I can see through you Wider than the sand And then you turn around The whole beach is looking at you

Swim between the flags Why that's what I know I got a bit of a scolding Why would we put flags out When you're not going to swim between them I'm like Yeah great point They're big and red and yellow

I don't really know how you miss them And it's unfair, it's a one-way conversation You don't even my defence I've got to say too mate We've got Alison with us on the phone You had a shout out on the loudspeaker Yes I have I was at the airport

And I was flying down to Pumiston North And I didn't realise That there's a regional airport As well as a domestic So I was walking up and down because I'd never taken to the Permanent North before so my name gets called out

and the guy I was going through the domestic and I said where's gate number 50 something island he said oh it's way back there so I went racing up but I was too late

I missed the flight Oh no and I've always been so scathing of people that do that I'm like how could you miss a flight I see it regional and domestic confuse me

because it's all domestic like yeah exactly technically You don't need to divvy it up, you're right. Yeah, I'm like, what classifies regional? Yeah, I get that. I'm going to a wedding, and I said, well, how much would it be to get the next flight,

which was an hour later? And she said, oh, $150, so I thought, oh, stuff that. So you just didn't go? I just didn't go, no. Well, you already paid for accommodation, wedding present, you know, even things. So it was like... It felt like you should have gone. Yeah, I feel like you were making a...

case for going. It made the call, though, that's it. I missed a flight wasn't meant to meet. Exactly. Exactly, that's what I thought to. When you walk into the airport and you turn right, the regional terminal is behind you, so I didn't even, yeah.

Preaching to the quiet, Alison. I've never really thought about that, you're right, Megan. Yeah. Good on you, Alison. You go and have a wonderful day. You too, guys. See ya. Keep them coming through.

0800 of the hits the telephone number. There's a great one to be. about a lost kid too. And I'm reading that now. Hopefully it's a happy ending. Yeah, no. It's not a good ending, guys. Not a good ending.

Not a good ending. So I won't read the rest of that. In fact, see, if you've seen a lost little child, please call O800 of the Hits. Little Billy. He's out there wandering the street. John O'Ben and Megan. The podcast. The Hits.

So I have been taking some silly advice from social media. I've seen some things. one this morning I'm not ever going to do again. It was a concoction to stop bloating. Yeah, a bit of bloaty after having a bit of milk-based meal over the weekend. And he didn't even do the buffet dinner last night. A team-building buffet dinner last night. Megan forgot.

She's the... I've got a lot going on. Got a bloaty stomach. I know. I'm going to saw weird bloating stomach. Sometimes they pierce holes and cows, don't they, when they bloat. Do you know that? Oh, do they?

Yeah, like if they're filled up with gas and something, just sort of release the air. I mean, I'm not insinuating that you are a cow. A bovine at all. I'm just saying that's what they do on the farm and the rural sector. Well, that's an option. Please don't pierce a hole in myself. But the other advice I've taken is a relaxation technique.

And I did actually chuck this into AI to see if there was any truth behind it. And it checks out. The only thing is every time I try and do it, you really have to be alone. Yeah. Because I did it in the car. Yeah, you did walk in. What on earth is happening here? It made me feel uncomfortable.

We were doing it as a collective. So what you have to do to relax your, is it the Vegas nerve? Vegas, which is somewhere in your body. That's the one that keeps all your, like, stress, I don't know, that big nerve. Right. This is how you relax. So you want to do it as well, Ben? Yeah, I guess.

That's the sound of an enthusiastic participant. I reckon it. makes you feel better afterwards. Okay, I'll try. I'll try. I'll try. So, you need to stick out your tongue as far as you can. This is a prank? No, it's actually not a prank. Stick out your tongue. I didn't end in the prank yesterday. Everyone in the car or whatever you can do it to, stick it out. No, as far as you can,

the only problem is with your tongue dangling out of your pie hole, you look like a dog trying to cool down in an overheated car, you know? And now go, no, I'm joking. Stick out your tongue as far as you can. Close your mouth with your tongue out. close your mouth Ben there you go and now you need to keep it out as far as it will go for 40 seconds

it looks like he's having a medical event it looks like he's got an anaphylactic reaction in his bottom lip so this is meant to relax you remember so it's something to do with your tongue being connected to the vagus nerve and after 40 seconds

your tongue's dry and you look like an idiot I mean you couldn't get a better person to try this out on because if anyone needs relaxation it's the guy dangling his tongue out of his mouth right now he's just going wind it up wind it up for a long time 40 seconds with your tongue out okay do you want to put that thing away do you notice you don't think about your tongue at all

until you start talking about your tongue then you're really aware of it how are you feeling okay I felt a bit weird that what we just did I mean it's not prime conditions With the bright lights And we're all waiting for you Yeah, yeah You're all sitting around

Because no people would be And you're going Come on, come on Yeah So that would You would do that normally Probably by yourself Right

Yeah And you can do it several times the day And it's supposed to just like Reset you And relax you When I first did it I was like Oh

Feels good Yeah I'm just happy we got a video of that Yeah Don't do it Like my advice My advice Don't do it around the office

No It's hung hanging out It's a meeting Just waiting to happen What's you doing You're okay and you can't talk for 40 seconds. So I don't know what's wrong with me,

but when I did it yesterday, my tongue went purple. Oh, really? Is it going to fall off? That screams relaxation. John O'Benn and Megan. The podcast. Now, I reckon everyone suffers from this

when you're just kind of an autopilot and you say stuff and you're like, afterwards you're like, oh, did I? Or, you know, you're just kind of not really quite thinking. And it must happen to me over the weekend because I went into a store, bought a shirt. and while I was there they were like

oh do you for the receipt do you have like an account that you're not yeah now you just hand over your phone number now don't you and I said my phone number not really thinking you know let's send my phone number and then the guy went what really and I was like oh and I sort of looked at him because I obviously

it just slipped straight into autopilot you said your phone number I was like yeah what what he's like oh my goodness and I was like oh my goodness and I was like I'm like, oh, you know, because I'm so used to saying it every day on this show. I was like, that's not my phone number.

But that is if you want to call me between 6 and 10 in the mornings, you can. You can also text for 18. I know. I was surprised they didn't rattle that off. And I honestly was just in such autopilot that I must have just rattled off. Phone number. Oh, 100 of the hits. He was like, oh, tell us the best customers you've had in your shop.

Not coming up in the system or anything like that for the poor guy. So, yeah. So really one of those autopilot moments. I was like, oh, God. Now I look like I've just dropped the radio show into copy. conversation, yeah, you can call me on our 100 of the hits, right? You do it, you do actually have a great number, or no, I'll give you a number out, but it's got your name.

It has actually. It's a really smart, you got it on early with the name numbers. But not that I ever use it for that, you know, because it just sounds a bit like, you know, you know, that's one of those things. Why don't you use it? I don't know. It's just to do the number. But it's such a cool thing.

I know. But, you know, everyone's so what's. Oh, 100 pen is cool. Yeah, oh yeah. But I'd got that, maybe I'd say that. But then, no, but imagine. it was. Imagine you went around going, oh, 100 Ben is cool. You'd be like, oh, right, mate.

Yeah. So it's just as bad as saying, oh, 100, that. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The hit. Oning, producer Troy, you mentioned something after the show yesterday, and we thought, well, we don't do it. Maybe you're the only one that does it. Yeah. Shouldn't have shared this. I know, but that's what radio is. I mean,

showering is usually a pretty private sort of exercise, isn't it? But you get on commercial radio, you share all of your showering habits, don't you? Honestly, you don't know how much it varies between person to person. Like you get wet, you dry yourself. You can't imagine how, you know, how many different techniques are there. Interesting. It's like when we talk to,

and this is just a bit inside, but you know, you talk to other radio shows. You're all doing the same thing, but people do it slightly different ways. Yeah, true. You know, so. You know, so just say what ways right or wrong or whatever it is. Well, ratings, probably, no idea?

I think we're doing it the wrong way. Popularity, but anyway, who's to say? Who's to say? So, producer Troy, Talk us through the showering situation Well, it's just something I do at the end of the shower Once I finish showering, before I step out To save from my towel getting too wet

I hand squeegee my body Is that what you call it? So you both, do you do every part of your body You sit hand squeegeing with both hands? I start with my hair and I, what little hair I have I flick the water down my back And then I do my torso, wipe that, do my arms, down the back Down the thighs, down the thighs

calves. A little rub down, a little rub down after my shower. And the water just pours off. And I'm like, all of that would be going into my tower. Right. So you're saving extra drying required by the towel. Yes. And I have, I've consulted chat GPT on this.

Don't think that's going to save you, mate. No. I've come with stats. You know, someone on your side. I keep roughly 220 litres of water out of my bath towels every year. Wow. But what a win? Increase the life.

lifespan of my towel. Oh, okay. Five years. Five years. Six for five years out of the time. But that is the towel's main duty is soaking up moisture. That's what it wants. It wants that.

It's sitting there all day waiting for you to come up. Just give it all the ears. It's coming. Now it's like rubbing you dry, but you know, it's the friction is there. It's like, I'm not getting the moisture that I desire. Like I understand and I believe you that it saves water from your towel, but like I don't know why that's necessary because that's the towel's fun. Like, you know, you damp towels sitting on the rack.

Right. It's a bit, you know, smelly. Well, let's Troy the only one. Well, I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. No, I'm not rubbing myself off on the shower. No. But I'm probably the opposite as well, and I frustrate people in the household as well because I'm out.

Boom, see, I'm done. I'm out. I'm moving on with my day and, you know, the bath mat gets a lot of, it gets quite a, you know. Do you just leave that on the ground? No, no, I take it off, but I just, I don't probably. He doesn't towel in the shower. No, I'm out. He lets the bath mat get the full dripping.

Yeah, exactly. Yes. I won't leave it on the floor. No, but yeah. Yeah, I'm definitely telling off in the shower. I appreciate that. But I didn't know that, you know, self-squeeging was an option. So maybe that's something to look into. Troy, you'll be happy to know the phones lighting up. I don't know if they're lighting up in your favour. Jeremy, happy new year.

Happy New Year. Are you self-squeegeeer? I am. And sometimes if I can't be bothered, self-squeegeeing, I do stand there and drip dry. Oh, how long does that? 40 minutes later Oh, Jerry's just bloody drip drawing Wow

Drip dry How long to take you to drip dry Jeremy He's like I'm not going to tell you that No no Too many questions Too personal Also you say can't be bothered

It's like you're literally Just like touching your stomach Like it's not a lot of effort It feels a bit central for me At that time of the morning I'm not giving myself a little bit Spend it and touched himself like that in many years That's a late night thing for me

All right So, I added the Hats, 4487. Okay, we've got one. We got one. John O'Benn and Megan. The podcast. The Hats. Producer Troy really, he floored us with his post-shower technique where he rubs his hands up and down,

sensually, down his body. I don't have been sensually. We've just added that. To remove excess water from his body, so it doesn't go on his towel, he does what we're calling self-squeegeing. You could start up an account. Self-squeegee. What's the content?

What's the content? just to watch Troy. That's your only fans. Squeegeing his eyes. But you're not the only one, Troy. There's loads of people. In fact, just a little bit of a dog leg. Someone's texted in 4487.

My husband just purchased an air dryer that he sort of air drys himself dry, top to bottom. Oh. Like a body dyson. Yeah. I've seen someone do that in the pool changing sheds. They had a leg up on the bench and we're really getting involved. It would be nice if it was like the, you know, the car drive the car through one of those car washers. Just stand there.

My husband's been known to do that with my hairdryer. Oh, really? I see someone did that at the gym. That was quite confronting. I was the gym base. And I was like, oh, is this the place to do that? The blow dry system, which... Yeah, but anyway.

Yeah, we've got Franz with us. You're a squeegeeer, Franz. Hey, how you doing? Lovely to have you on, Franz. Self squeegeeing. We've just learnt the art of self-squeeing. Didn't even know it was a thing. Are you team squeegee?

Yeah. You can't do your back. Yeah, right. You work from the top, like you rub your hair a little bit. Then you do your chest and then you do your arms and your leg. You put the water down the drain. Like if you put yourself, if you dry yourself with the towel, then the towel's got to dry and the air gets moist.

And then you've got to deal with moss and mold and all that. You're just saving yourself a whole headache. You've got to think ahead. You've left frog to moss and mold issues. Yeah, all right. I guess it makes sense. You don't want that moisture in your house if he can avoid it. Yeah, right.

Just put it down the drain where it belongs. Well, France. Yeah, Franz. He's a big backer of the self-squee-s. Someone's texting going, oh, squeegee. I didn't know that there was an official word for it. Yeah. But I've always swish swiped all the way through their showering career.

Oh, wow. Okay. Totally normal, says Kristen and Christchurch. I do it every morning. Lee, happy new year. Happy New Year. Show catchphrase. Are you self-squeegeeing or not with your hands up?

after the shower? 100%. I've always done it. And my kids actually, they don't quite squeegee, but they shake off. Like they shake all the excess water off before they towel by it.

Yeah, right. Well, someone's just texting saying, I walked down on my husband doing this many years ago, and I did have questions. It feels like, yeah. But again, you don't know what other people do, like you said before.

In the comfort of your own bathroom, whatever you get up to in there is your choice. But if you do work in Breakfast Radio, have to talk about it on the radio choice so thank you for sharing that well lee we'll let you get on with your squeegeing why don't we all make a pact we'll do it tomorrow morning the three of us together no we're not going to have the workshouse oh like after a shower after a show yeah i'll try it can't wait for that yeah we're not doing it together like we're just like we're not going to film it no i mean i can't wait for that review what are we going to say oh like what it feels like

yeah it feels like the obvious thing you're doing we're going to give it a go it's called an extension Megan on the content. I can hear it. Adding a layer to it. I'll tell you how I swipe the water off my body. Thank you. Tell us about it. Don't.

John O'Ben and Megan. The podcast. Last night we had a bit of a team dinner. The whole hits team from right around the country all getting together. It doesn't happen too often, which is nice. Yeah, we're having a conference over the next two days. It's big boy stuff. Upper echelon sort of stuff.

You wouldn't understand. So we're conference people. But you say it doesn't happen often. It's once a year. Yeah, it's right. the whole team together. Yeah. So there was a dinner and all you can eat buffet, eight, which we, is become an annual

tradition and geez, I make an absolute pig of myself at a buffet. I tried to start slow with a couple little bits of sushi. And then by the end your elbows deep in Tandori chicken, like, you know. Yeah, it was eight different food stations at quarter. Yeah, it's really good. I panic. You get up there, you just kind of panic. Yeah, I'm overwhelmed.

Because of Grace is like, why are you eating like a bigger fish in your store? I don't know. I'm eating it up by the buffet. I don't know why. I was petic. It really brings out the worst in human behavior, the old oil you can eat buffet. It's a real, you see it as a personal challenge. To get your money's worth.

I mean, I saw our boss come back with tandoori chicken, steak, and then he had some sushi as well. I mean, he had the United Nations on his plate. Oh, that's great. That was great. But Megan. Yeah. Where are you? No, Megan didn't turn up.

You know, there's an issue when you look at your phone and you got 28 messages. Yeah. And I was like, oh no. Was there 28? Yeah, we went pretty hard. She did. She would have forgotten. It would be an email if she wouldn't have read somewhere along the line.

We're waiting to eat, Megan. We'll wait until you get here for some gag. And then we used AI to AI, our company CEO, yeah. Bogsy was dancing on the table. Do you know that? When I initially saw it, I was like, oh, no, he's going to know he wasn't there. And then when I looked a bit harder, I looked at the rest of the people on the table. And I was like, I don't reckon guys anyone.

I love that you believe that. our CEO would be dancing on a dinner table. It started with him in the background of toast, which didn't quite look like him. It was probably like a stunt double for him or something with AI. But then it got worse, didn't it? He was dancing on the table. He was taking photos with everyone.

I was having bathroom selfies with him. Yeah, I saw. Then I dropped him home in the car. But he wasn't there. No, he wasn't there. Yesterday was Run Club Day. And I was like, I'm sure there's something. No, I'm sure there's something happening today.

So once I got fashion sorted for that, and then got Iyer to bed, I came out and saw 28 messages, and I was like, oh my God. No, tell us the truth. You're still all bloaty from having full milk, and you couldn't even fathom the idea of an all-you-can-eat-buffa. Yes, that's also true,

because I'm trying to drink this awful, like, concoction that I saw on social media that I've now thrown out, but I genuinely did not remember. There is a calendar option, too, you can have, which does remind you about. My work calendar, I don't have notifications going. I only have it on my personal and I didn't put it in there. Between you and me, we're both shocking in admin.

Poor Ben's really holding the ship together with his emails. Well, we ate enough for you, so that was good. You don't have to worry about that. Did you bring me anything? No, we did know. We bought you some great memories with Bogsy, our CEO. All sitting in your phone. The problem was that you didn't see it for so much later that we didn't get the satisfaction of Megan replying to any of them. It wasn't any, yeah.

It was like, oh, that's a classic one. Oh, that's funny. We just had a big laugh for like an hour. And then later on, you were like, oh, sorry, I was dealing with kids and families. No acknowledgement of the wonderful AI work that had taken place in the previous messages. Oh, you can acknowledge the work now. It took time, creativity. No, it was great.

Thank you. Yeah, you put the shit something for a moment. John O'Benn and Megan. The podcast. The Hats. Troy, you just got a fruit pole at home. Yeah. Riviting 6 a.m. channel, though.

That's a big. a big chapter in your relationship, bringing a fruit bowl into the marriage. My partner, she made it. So it's a special one of those ones where you go to the ceramic painting course at night, have a little wine and paint your ceramics. Oh, that's cool. Is it, like, is it a good one? Like, you know, sometimes you're like, oh, we have to welcome this in because it's been made

with love. It actually is really beautiful. She's drawn, like, lemons on it and done like a blue ring around it. It looks professional. It looks like what your nana had, like, 10 years ago. So you're not just tolerating this art. You're like welcoming it. It's a feature piece.

So I said to my partner, we should get some good fruit and make use of this fruit bowl. Make it a feature of the kitchen. Oh, bless. And so she goes sweet. She goes to the supermarket. And I imagined bananas, some pears, apples, apples, the classic fruit bowl fruit.

Yeah. She brings home two large persimums. That's all. That was it. That was it for the fruit bowl. That's it for the fruit bowl. And it made me question everything about it. our whole relationship.

Even just two as well. I mean, aesthetically, the orange persimon probably goes really well with the fruit bowl. It pops, aesthetically.

Yeah, I reckon it does. But that's not much, not a variety in there. Like, I'm new to the Persimmon game. I hadn't probably had it until, like,

welcome. Welcome to Ben. I know, I don't know, growing up in Masterton, I don't know if they were a thing or not. Exotic fruits. Yeah.

What are these? Fruits from a faraway land. I know. I just didn't even know. They weren't even on my radar until like about six months a year ago. and my wife and kids are really into them.

I'm like, well, what's all this about? And I actually really enjoy them. You'll see me, I'll cut them up. I'll take them for lunch, so I often have them. Yeah. I don't really know if you're meant to eat them like an apple or cut them up. I just cut them up. But I actually really enjoy it.

But yeah, and my wife loves it. She's like, first thing she says, get more person in when I'm going on the weekend. I've never ever heard anyone. Yeah, no. So she would, her and Eve would really get on. Were you said this in your top five fruit? Yeah, I'm like, so I'm really enjoying it. So I'm going to the top five.

Let's a lot about you. Ben boys is top five fruits. Oh, well, it depends on an apple. You can't, you know, it's a good apple. It's a good apple. It's a good apple. And narshipar I'm putting up there. Oh, wow.

I love a narshie pet. Yeah. I love a persimine as well. I'm not, along the most of those. Strawberries? Yeah, strawberries. Yeah, strawberries. Not vanilla.

Borghumans. Bursamine is like, it promises so much. It's good. It's bright orange, like shiny. It looks exotic and you bite into it and it's like a whole lot of nothing. That's a dragon fruit for me. That's a dragon fruit. They're the same.

They look amazing. And they're like, nah. Disappointing. All right. Persimins are a good little filler. Perciam is a good little filler. is a good filler. It's a good filler content. I'm not yourself. I'm not enough. I find banana. I do like bananas, but they're a bit like you've got to eat them now sort of thing. Yeah. Yeah. And they all start to like ripen next to other. I don't know what they're doing with the other fruit as well. That kind of weds me out a little bit. I'm like, don't put them next to the thing because they're kind of ripen next to other. I don't know what they're doing with the other fruit as well. That kind of wreats me out a little bit. Don't put them next to the thing because they're rubbing more though what's going on with the fruit

what are they up to yeah really toxic we still haven't got into your top five oh look I don't know so we've got apples strawberries persimans in there you said nashy watermelon it's watermelon oh yeah that's a good top of my head I'm sure I've left out some grape grapes grapes crispy grapes I love a crispy grape mango

see I'm a fruit in the fridge would you put fruit in the fridge though yeah like a fruit bowl's not really my thing A worst place to keep your fruit, I would have thought. Apart from bananas. Yeah. Bananas are just wrapping. It's a banana bowl, really.

Who wants, like, warm apples and warm grapes and, like, I know that was their natural habitat. But then for some reason, we move them to the fridge. Where are we heading with this? Well, I feel like we need to now text through your top, top fruits. Top five fruits, okay. I think we've just discovered how vanilla Ben is. Oh, what was vanilla about that? My top five apple.

Hershey pearceman Narshy None of this you'd get in Marsdenum You know You get a banana And a mandarin If you're lucky

Manderin if you're lucky You're lucky That's The other ones with the Pits And the Mastin people right now Are you're going What this guy's all bloody Auckland now

Isn't he? Let the personman Yeah And now Megan's saying I'm vanilla Wow Okay offensive 4-4 7

Your top five fruits Does anyone else got a person in a John O'Ben and Megan The podcast The Hats You know what I actually did On the long weekend

Which I'm really proud of myself I've been putting off cleaning the windows Since Probably since COVID You know COVID Was a wonderful time for the I think the universe just said

Hey why don't you just reset Do all the chores That need to be done around the house Our houses weren't looking You know There's no period in time Where your houses Were looking any better

Than COVID Do those things you've always said Like you know Make that banana bread with those bananas that had been in the freezer for years, you know? You know, I got to the point where, like, there was genuinely, genuinely nothing left to do. So that was a great pair.

But so, you have left them waiting. And then, you know, when the sun beams in and you can see how filthy they really are, and that's been sitting with me since COVID. Right. I must get around to that. And it's just other stuff gets in the way. Like, daily stuff you need to do.

The windows fall, the priority falls down. I get it, yeah. And the worst thing about doing windows is, you do one side, and then you're like, oh, there's a whole other side. Yeah. Yeah. It's easier just to smash them out and get new ones.

I was there. So I managed to get around to it. But then it's like when you start cleaning, like if you see a mark on the wall, don't ever start cleaning your walls. Because then all you see is all the marks. Yeah, you're like, oh, there's no one there. There's no one there.

Yeah. Like that with the windows. Because now all I'm seeing is little smudge marks and, you know, where I haven't done it properly, it's hard. It's hard to clean windows. Yeah, but I like to think the smudge marks are slightly better because at least you can see through them now.

Yeah, that's good. Oh, true. That's good. Yeah. Some light to. actually coming into the household. So, yeah, that was, when was COVID? Gee, that was five, six years ago?

Yeah, true. 2020 was kind of when we all, yeah, all kicked in. I don't know how interesting this is for everyone else, but what's your technique? Do you use... I actually, you know, I actually chat GPT is a substance, which was white vinegar. White vinegar and, like, dishwashing soap,

like palm olive or something. So you're making your own. Bootleg window cleaner, guys. If you want some, I can meet you in the car. Park out the back. Or you can just get white vinegar and just soap and do it yourself. You just do a rub on, rub off?

No, spray it on. It really cuts through the grease and grime this mixture. Amazing. And then you're hosing it off from the outside or what are you doing? Oh, no, that's on the inside. But the outside, I'm just scrubbing the soap and, yeah. But yeah, there we go. You're really getting into the details.

No, it's just curious. Have you guys, have you guys procrastinated? I can't imagine you would procrastinate too much, Ben, you get everything knocked off your to-do list. Oh, no, but I do have, like, the garage over all my cost. and stuff and it gets quite messy from time to time. And it's at one of those stages where I'm like, I really need to get into there and get it sorted.

Is that a full day job, you reckon? Yeah, it would be. It would be a full day, yeah. And to set aside a whole day to do something. Yeah, so I'm like, I'll get around to, you know. And I do from time to time, probably six months ago and tidy it up, but then it gets messy again. If you were to organize that in your dream way,

would it be alphabetical order? Would it be sort of categorized? Categories, I'd probably go categories. Yeah, I did have for a while. categorizing it, then it got messy and people, you know, so that, yeah. You need racks and hang them all up and... So you'd have like sort of Disney costumes, categories, fruit, sporting. Oh my God.

Splo up costumes, you know, that's how I would categorize it as well, but yeah. So, yeah, but then it's like, it's sort of like, it's in the garage, but it's not all for costumes, the garage. You know, one day what I really love is one day you're going to be 75 and you're going to have a lot of costumes, hundreds and hundreds of costumes. What are you going to? I guess it's like probably us with tattoos when you're older. Like what's it all going to look?

What's that going to look like? He's going to start losing his mind and just wander around the neighbourhood. It's a different one every day. You're right. He's like, who's the guy that's the guy? The costume? He's the guy. Do you know he used to be on TV back in the day?

What was TV? What was it before? Have you procrastinated on anything? My war on fitness, I finally got it. Oh, you were talking about this. Oh, this is you were talking about this. It's a while ago. I just, I get really anxious getting it, I don't know why, I get so nervous, my car's not going to pass the test.

Well, it helps if you do it a bit more regularly, the nerves kind of subside. I went there and the man's like, do you know this was due in January? And I was like, oh my God, was it? Not good. She did know. I did know, I did. All right, so what have you procrastinated it on? The longest procrastinations are what's on your list right now that you haven't got to.

John O'Benon and Megan, the podcast. What have you been putting off for a while? John, I finally got around to clean the windows. Ah, yeah, and it was not enjoyable. It really wasn't. You start doing the windows. It's like water blasting. It's fun for, you know, a couple of minutes and then really starts to...

The novelty wears off quickly. 30 seconds for me, water blasting. 30 seconds. Yeah, I like... I'll do it for longer, but I just... It's really similar to the water blast. I'm like, I really want to do that. And then 30 seconds later, I'm like, yep, I'm done.

I've done that. It's fun and then I can move on. But I know it takes a lot longer. You filled your bucket. But I'm filled my bucket. Literally. Yeah, like, I'm like, oh, that. so much fun.

But yeah, my windows had been wiped or fondled with for five or six years since COVID. Wow. You need one of my carcher machines. You know, the little,

someone else has text that in too. It's a little thing that changed the window games. Yeah. It's also fun. Maybe for like five minutes. Five minutes. Okay. Ben would do one window.

I'll do it. But at the same time, I'm like, yeah, the novels he has been worn off. So what have you put off? What are procrastinating? Someone's text through vasectomy. And you were my early 20s,

didn't want to have kids. And then kept putting it off. I'm 38 now and I've just booked in this month. Don't take a real gamble there if you didn't want them in the early 20s. They don't like doing it to guys under 30. Oh really? Because my husband's had one. I don't know who wants me to tell everyone.

But he was under 30 when he had it, I think. Yeah. You just did tell everyone, by the way. Yeah, he did. No, that thing you said there that we were at that. He was such a baby about it. Oh, my God. It's not something you really look forward to.

I think someone had like whacked him there or something. It's like icing it. He'll be even more happy than. called of a baby about it too. We've got Bridgett with us on the phone. Happy New Year. Happy New Year. This show catchphrase.

Still can, six months. Well done us. We've been saying that. But what did you put off for many years? Getting a teaching degree. How many years? I said 30, but that might have been an exaggeration. It was probably about 25.

So this is something like what you always thought you're going to do? Yeah, when I was younger, I thought that's what I'd like to do. and then I was like, oh, that's a little bit hard. So I put it off. For 25 years. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and then I ended up getting a job at a kindergarten,

and I had to be qualified to work there, so I did it. Oh, good work. What did you do over that 25-year period that wasn't chasing your dream? Oh, everything. Do you wish, it might be a dumb question, but do you wish you'd done it sooner, or do you think it happened for a reason now? No, I think I was the right age. Got Raz done it.

Well, some people wouldn't have actually done it. You know, they would have said, oh, it's too late now. So good on you for doing it. Yeah. Thanks very much. What age were you when you got your degree? Oh, I'm 45. Oh, good on you.

Good on you. I could think of nothing worse than studying right now because I just couldn't be bothered. Thank you for sharing that with us, and congrats. Yes, cheers. Jason. Yes. Good to have you on. What have you been procrastinating, mate?

What have you been putting off? Oh, mate, it's been a long time coming, you know? Okay, what's that? I just needed to express myself and let you guys know. Okay. And maybe you guys are a little bunch of Muppets. I don't know where that was going. I've been putting that off for a long time.

I mean, we do know that, but it's good to be reminded of that every now again. I love it. You know, the worst part is our producer put that through. Yeah. You have the option to scream, Jason, Troy. I feel like we need to hear that from Jason. We need to be reminded of it. How many years has that been on your to-do list, Jason?

Since I got to the country, mate, seven years ago. Fair enough, we'll take that on the gin. That's fair enough. Came here all the way from South Africa to tell us that. That's right. Hey, good on you, mate. You're going to have a great day. John O'Ben and Megan.

The podcast. The Hats. $1,000, your share of it's only four or five minutes away. We're going to be doing that again, and as part of this campaign. You know, we live in a multi-media society where you want to get your message out on many platforms, don't you? Exactly. So over the last few weeks, we've been going out once a week

and playing credit card roulette with all three of our credit cards, just sort of shouting people, you know, coffees, lunch, etc. We stepped it up with the latest one, though. We were going to shout someone a tank of petrol. Yeah, so whatever they turned up to get at the gas station, one of us would have to pay. Producer Grace selected the one of our cards.

Pretty straightforward assignment. Pretty straight. You know, one of our cards we picked and then that person has to go and pay for the petrol. I knew what the mission involved But also just sort of lingering around the forecourt of a petrol station With a camera and a microphone You do feel like you're about to ambush some sort of predator

You know like an online What are you doing meeting a 16 year old sort of It is hard these days to give away free stuff though Because you just think free It doesn't happen to you So everyone's like no, no What's a catch, what's a catch, yeah Yeah, when there's sometimes there's no catch

Yeah so there's two or three people And lovely people who were like, oh, you know, this is a work car. Honestly, it's got a petrol card. Give it to someone who deserves it. There are a couple of those. Yeah, that was nice. And so it's sort of got to a bit of a desperate stage. Now I stuck my head in some guy's passenger window.

Here's the issue is that Jono, looking like he does, lovely man, he was also even letting people get out of the car. So he'd go up and creep against the car and like knock on the window. I'm like, just at least let them get out. Yeah, true. Sifting around in a cap and oh, yeah, probably an army jacket or something, you know. So that's exactly what he did. He was sifting around with a microphone, crept up to.

This gentleman wants to come, babe, I think. No, what is this guy going? Heaps up to the window. But I still wanted the backstory to this audio you're about to hear. And listen, I'm going to front foot and say, the audio doesn't sound, it's not going to read well. What you don't see is my friendly, smiley, happy face, you know, that these words are coming out of. But I'm trying to lure, trying to groom a guy out of his car. Okay.

Well, you could have just let him get out himself, but that's fine. I don't want to ruin the surprise, because we want to capture that gold on camera. Now, Grace doesn't have the camera stuck inside his car. So I'm going, why don't you come? Have it listen. You don't want a special treat? You don't even know what the special treat is?

Do you want the treat? Are you interested in the treat? Not interested. So I was just kind of, we've got a special little treat for you if you just get out of your car. Because you've got to kind of get, like, permission, but not give away the surprise. But banging on the guy's window going, do you want a special treat? Do you want a treat?

I mean, there's no more special treat than free petrol. No, but no. Like I said, it doesn't, you know, listening to audio only doesn't. Would your approach have differed if it was like a young female? Yeah, true. Would you like a special treat? Do you want a special treat? No, no, you're right.

There's no favouritism here, no sex. No internal misogyny here, thanks man. There we go out to a people. I go, would you like a special treat? Do you want a special treat? It's just in my pocket. It's my credit card, honestly. You can be winning an actual treat today.