Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - December 10 - Rachel House, The A To Z Of New Zealand, Are You Hard To Buy Presents For?

Episode Date: December 10, 2020

Today we discussed your "Sitter Stories", whether it was house sitting or babysitting and what went wrong. We had some absolute golden stories, one involving a spa overflowing all the way down the road. We also played The Jargon Game, Christmas edition. Ben had to call a random cafe and make a booking while at the same time trying to drop in words like "North Pole" "wrapping" and "Claus". Finally, Jono had a very awkward situation while at the petrol station yesterday when he forgot to bring his EFTPOS card.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Hello, hello, hello, hello. Welcome to the podcast.

Yeah, good to be with you. We just played a really fun game, which I think we'll talk about tomorrow on the radio. Stealing centre. Different played a really fun game, which I think we'll talk about tomorrow on the radio. Stealing Santa. Different from a work secret Santa, you still bring a present along that no one knows what you bought, but everyone gets the opportunity to potentially steal a present from other people or take a new present

depending on what number you're drawn. And it depends what sort of workplace you work in. You know, if you're quite a passive environment, then each number's just going to pick a present and happy and everyone's going to walk away happy. But if you work in a more aggressive, competitive environment, you've got people pinching presents off. So say, for example,

I'm number two, Ben's number nine, he can steal my present. Yeah, I can look around. I was trying to set the ground rules from the start because obviously we know everyone at the hits, but I don't feel like I know some of them well enough to steal a present off so i was like no one's going to be offended right we're all going to be able to steal presents and it's all going to be fine which meant you were going in hard when you said no one's going to be offended right which meant this uh

gloves are off i just wanted to see the ground rules because everyone's like oh no i'll be offended i'll just go oh that's my number i my present. Yeah, and the only person we felt comfortable enough around was Producer Juliet, young 22-year-old. We stole her presents twice. Twice, yeah. She had a bottle of wine, I was like, I'll take that, thanks, and then... She got another bottle of wine and chocolate and I took that as well. Yeah, so it was a brutal takedown. And it's

a fine line between a secret Santa delivery service and workplace bullying. Yeah. But I think we enjoy it. I think I should be a bully. I see why bullies are bullies. It's very satisfying. Oh, dear. Now, we have a fun show for you today on the podcast. A Kiwi actor who's been in some amazing movies.

Thor, Ragnarok. She's been in Hunt for World of People. She was a voice on Moana. She's in a brand new Disney Pixar movie with Jamie Foxx, Tina Fey, Graham Norton. So we talk about that, which is pretty cool. Yeah, very cool. Rachel House is her name. Also on the program, something happened to me at the petrol station

and it embarrassed me. It went on for 20 minutes. I'm ashamed. It felt like the guy behind the counter was really trying to embarrass you more. Yeah. It was public, very public. In front of 20 to 25 people. There was frustrations. Tempers were high, and it involved petrol.

Yeah. So what more do you want? Well, no more. No more? Good, because I won't tell you anymore. Enjoy the podcast. The radio version of Morning Breath. It's Jono and Ben on the hits.

We want to open up the phone lines 0800 the hits, or you can text us 4487. We want your best sitter stories, they're house sitting or babysitting or what has gone on because a friend of mine he was babysitting his niece and nephew who were probably around 10 to 12 years old

and he just had enough. He was like, it's time for bed guys and they're like, it's six o'clock. So he's like, nah, he's wrapping it up

time to get to bed and it's light outside. I mean, he's like, what a 10 and 12 year old to bed. It's six o'clock. He said like, in his defence he'd been looking after more day.

He's like, alright, it's taken a long time to get to bedtime, so we've had dinner, we've done everything, it's time to wrap things up. It's a very elderly approach to sleeping. 6 o'clock. You couldn't do anything worse to a child of that age. Just put them to bed at daylight hours. I know, in their bedroom.

I was like, yeah. Because I guess when they're not your kids, you know, when you go and look after other kids, they're never as cool as your kids. Let's be honest. Cool a spade a spade. And I guess you just want to get it over and done with. Get it done. I see his approach.

A friend of ours also, he was babysitting some kids and he managed to somehow get himself locked out of the house while the kids were. They were quite young kids were inside and had quite a panic sort of half an hour Well instantly rendering his job as babysitter pointless I think. Do you still get paid for babysitting when you're sitting outside of the house and the babies are sitting inside?

Well you try to like talk through the window through the sliding door going just flick that switch Oh and I tell you there's no harder task than trying to instruct a child to unlock a lock from the inside. It's easier to teach me to grow hair probably. Bless you, Juliet. Thanks.

But I imagine when people go, could you rely on teenagers too to do babysitting? And I was a teenager. I babysitted. I did not understand the level of responsibility that was required to look after other people's children. And as house sitting as well. I've mentioned this before, but my family went away and trusted one of my friends to look after the house, who I wouldn't have trusted, but they did. My parents were like, yeah, we'll look after the house.

He had a big party, apparently the party of the year. I wasn't there for it, but everyone was like, great. In your house. Great party at your house. But I was like, thanks. Why? I never saw it. You know?

So that's what can happen if you trust people to look after, you know, your kids, your house, mate. I'm like, thanks, well, I never saw it. You know, so that's what can happen if you trust people to look after, you know, your kids, your house. Particularly teenagers, all they want to do is pash things. When you're a teenager, you just want to

pash everything. They don't want to look after your kids. Do you? I had to look after, I can focus on mine. All right, I've got two, I can look after them.

Okay, but when I added more into the mix, that's when I lose control. On Sunday, Poppy's friend came over, lovely Camilla, and Jen was like, I'm just going out. Whatever you do, don't let Camilla injure herself. I was like, yeah, whatever.

Why would I let her injure herself? And then Camilla injures herself on the jungle gym. Now, I put this down to convenient timing and the jungle gym. This isn't on me. I didn't push her off the jungle gym. You're responsible. I mean, the scissor running race went fine, didn't it? It did, yeah. They were able to light their cigarettes just fine.

Wonderful afternoon with those children. So we want this morning your best stories, whether you were babysitting or whether you were house sitting. There's been some shockers when you've house sat. We always spilt spaghetti. One of the kids spilt spaghetti bolognese on a white leather chair when we were like house sitting once. Oh jeez.

But you know what took it out? Talcum powder. Internet, thank you, internet. You put talcum powder on the thing and it took out the red stain. I was like, oh, because it looked like an expensive chair. That's good for murders as well, isn't it? Yeah, well. Talcum brother or whatever.

Maybe it does work. It was a ball of nose. I promise. What's gone on when you've been house sitting? What's gone on when you've been babysitting? Your best sitter stories. Love to hear from you this morning. We might find a prize for our favourite call next.

What have you got for us, Ange and Vikargal? Hello, good morning. I have got a babysitting story for you. Five years ago, I was babysitting an eight-year-old and a six-year-old, a boy and a girl, TJ and Nina. Yeah. And they were very naughty. They decided, because it was raining, I went out to bring in the washing.

Tea for them was cooking. And they locked me out. Great prank. Great prank. Good prank. This is a plot line to a comical movie. It was a bit like Home Alone. And did you have to, how did you get back in, Ange?

With great difficulty, I ended up smashing the toilet window. Oh, did you? It got to that stage. Were you trying to negotiate with them through the window? I was trying to negotiate them to unlock the door. It was a sliding door, and I was like, just flip that switch. Come on, guys. Just have a girlfriend of ours.

We don't want you in here anymore. We're waiting for mum and dad. I mean, well, he's cooking. It's going to burn the house down with yous in it. Oh, that is very good. I mean, they're tough people to. It's going to burn the house down with yous in it. Oh, that is very good. I mean, they're tough people to negotiate with kids, aren't they? They stick to their side. You have all the gifts.

They're negotiating with kids. No, they give nothing. Oh, that's so good. Hold the line. We'll find something for you. I love that story. You have a great Christmas, all right? Let's go to Tim.

He's in Christchurch. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast, Tim Moreno. Sitting stories. Morning, guys. How are you? Good, thanks, buddy. Yeah, my story's a good one. It's my first time babysitting for my parents,

and I have three younger siblings. Two of them, sorry, two of them. There's a squeaky door you're running in the background. Oh, yeah. I'm at work. Just give that a blast of CRC at some stage today. So anyway, they were outside, I was inside doing a couple of jobs and next thing they come flying in the door

and they'd been playing with matches and actually set the palm tree in the backyard on fire. Oh, no! So, yeah, called the fire brigade and then we grabbed the garden hose and got it all sorted, but yeah, it the fire brigade and then we grabbed the garden hose and got it all sorted. But, yeah, it was not my best experience. That was a blemish on your babysitting record. Yeah, over before it began.

Oh, Jesus. So good. You're on the line. We'll find something for you. We really appreciate you coming. We'll go to Russell. Welcome, Russell. How's Auckland this morning?

It's doing well. A bit of rain here and there. The sun seems to be pushing out the clouds, so we look like we're in for a good day. Oh, that was a wonderful weather report. Rusty, we need to put you on the payroll with that weather report. Sitting stories, what happened to you, Russell? Yeah, so basically we had mates of ours had gone away on holiday

and they left us looking after the house. And towards the end of the stay, there were a juice to come back the following morning at around 10 o'clock. So we decided to get a couple of mates over for a barbie and everybody, after a couple of tequilas and yaggies, landed up into the spa bath and one of my mates happened to go out into the bathroom and he came back with a five litre bottle of bubble bath. We started pumping that into the small bath.

So needless to say, we didn't realise after so many tequilas and yeggies that the foam was running down the driveway into the road. So we had the security company rock up on the door to ask if everything was alright. He said, yeah, there's nothing wrong. And he said, well, your road is white all the way from the top to the bottom.

Needless to say, our mates rocked up the next day. The house was spotless. The spa was relatively clean, and the foam was still in the road. Oh, really? Oh, the whole street was covered in foam? The whole road, basically. They were up on a hill, so the foam ran down the driveway and then into the road and the road also in Daniel.

Oh, my God. The whole road. And the foam was from one side to the other side. It caught up in the gutters and just ran all the way to the bottom of the road. Oh, that is a... A thick layer of foam. That's a very enjoyable story, but not as enjoyable as me listening to you say spa bath. Can you say spa bath again?

Spa bath. Spa bath. Love it. Russell. Russell, we owe the love. We ought to send something to you as well, all right? You have a great Christmas and we don't catch up with you. Thanks, guys.

This is your new breakfast. Health Star rating still pending. It's Jono and Mano Mahez. You've got a Christmas challenge for me right now. Yeah, the Christmas jargon game. We have played this previously with the election where we try and crowbar certain jargon from events into a natural phone conversation. I tell you what, we're doing a lot of great marketing for Christmas, aren't we?

Has Santa taken out an advertising schedule on this show? Because he should be paying top dollar for the coverage we're giving Christmas this year. And just more free advertising for them right now. Ben Boyce, I'm going to hold up various signs which contain words associated with Christmas. Things like reindeer, claws, presents, Santa. Okay. And I want you to try and work these in as I hold them up into this phone conversation. A natural conversation.

Every correct one you land, I'll give you a ding. Okay. That's the formatics of the game. All right. See how many Christmas terms I can get into this phone call. Is it cafe? Heading through to Gore. Yep.

Hi, it's Double Kitchen Lee speaking. Hey, Lee. How's it going? Not too bad. How's it going? I'm going all right. My name's Chris. Chris Smith.

How's it going? Good. You good? You good? What's the weather like today, mate? you're being yourself. I'm going all right. My name's Chris. Chris Smith. How's it going? Good. Yeah, you're good. You're good. What's the weather like today, mate? Weather is... It was nice, but the wind's coming to the party like usual.

Oh, we've had a lot of rain. Dear, oh dear, we've had a lot of rain around here at the moment. It's, yeah, no, not fun. Just for you to say firstly, Merry Christmas. Oh, very good. Thank you.

Do you guys do decoration? I mean, what are they, oh, reservations. Reservations, we can do that for you. What are you looking for? Maybe on Friday. I was going to go with my friend Carol, but she can't go anymore. So I'll just be all by my elf, just me. The old one-man band? Yeah, just the one-man band.

Just Gold Chris Smith in there, anyway. Gracing you with my presents. The Friday, Friday, Friday. And you just had the lemon. Yeah, Friday. Yeah, that sounds good. I mean, a few more other quick questions. Sorry to bug you, but the business,

does it have sort of poles and stuff, you know, to keep up the roof? You know, the roof is staying up. She's all good. She's good because if you do have poles, I'll go near the North Pole rather than anyone located south. But that's fine. Just the little thing I've got. Right.

And, geez, what sort of meals? What's your best meal at the cafe? For me personally, I like my greasies, but the open chicken sandwich. Oh, I could slay an open chicken sandwich, that's for sure. Yeah, no, that's not bad at all. Actually, the seafood chowder's actually a fan favourite. Oh, okay. That sounds good.

And do you have, like, you know, just keeping things safe at the moment? How lots of hand sanitiser? Oh, for sure. You've got to be doing it. Yeah. You've got to be doing it. That's it. I'll hold you to that.

It's always their first thing. They always love to get a dry hand. Yeah, yeah. And if I don't like the meal, which I'm. I'll hold you to that. It's always their first thing. They always love to get a dry hand. Yeah, and if I don't like the meal, which I'm sure I'll love, is there some sort of out clause? Can I get a refund or not? I won't say. No, don't remember that one. It's not worth repeating.

Look, to be honest, I'm going to start wrapping this up right now. It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits radio station. Ah, right. I'm trying to... Jono's holding up signs of Christmas sayings. I had to try and insert those into a weird conversation. Ah, that. I'm trying to, Jono's holding up signs of Christmas sayings. I had to try and insert those into our weird conversation.

Ah, that's why it was punishing. That's why Ben had somehow miraculously become more punishing than he usually is. Very good.

Thank you for tolerating it. You know, there was a dozen Christmas slogans in there. Not one did you catch there. I thought it was

on board, but I thought, oh, no, we'll just ignore it. Yeah, no, I thought you did catch on to it. Give your business a plug. The Stable Kitchen Cafe down at 103 Main Street. Actually a family-orientated sort of place. The old man has it. And actually Mother's Flowers by Veronica next door too.

Oh, you're running a bit of a flower operation. That's it. That's the whole shebang going on there and then I'm here and then we have the grandparents coming down. Granddad's the

scones and the muffins and granddad's down here. Oh, that is a family business. It's like how Trump runs the

White House. Yeah. Exactly. Except you run a restaurant in Flores. Yeah. Oh, that's very

cool. Hold the line. We want to send you out something to say thank you for letting us waste your time. That's bloody

good. All right, hold the line, my friend. Some people skip breakfast, the meal, and also this show. It's Jono and Ben on the Hits. Hey, we were doing something yesterday afternoon, weren't we? And after I left you guys, I was like, oh, I need to fill up the car with petrol. Always becomes the world's most arduous task, doesn't it? I don't know why you always leave it.

And you probably need to do it when you're not in a rush. But for some reason you do it and you're like, I'm in a rush and now I need petrol. Yeah, when you break it down it probably takes four to six minutes. But it becomes the world's biggest task when you need to do it and squeeze it in the middle of your day or whatever. So I was like, oh now's a good time. Not having to go anywhere.

I'll just do it on the way home. So filled up the car. It was textbook. Great filling. Walked into the petrol home. So filled up the car. It was textbook. Great filling. Walked into the petrol station. I was like, because I never knew the word for the petrol, the tap. The bowser.

The bowser. You always talk about the bowser. I never knew what that was. The tap. The tap. The petrol tap. The pump, you know, whatever it is.

But it's a bowser. Is it like the big metal thing that it comes out of? Yeah, the tap. The petrol tap, I've been calling it, but now I've learned, since working with you, John, it? Yeah, the petrol tap I've been calling it, but now I've learnt, since working with you, John, it's one of the few things I've learnt. There's some countries that call it the petrol donk. Oh, really?

Yeah, overseas in America I heard a guy calling it the petrol donk. I was like, oh, okay, is this thing here? I like the Bowser. I like the tap. I can't get the tap thing to work. The tap's not going. You just have no interest in learning any of that stuff, do you? No, anything to do with cars.

Like, as soon as someone talks about a car, I'm like, oh, this, you know, I try to check out. He doesn't even know what a steering wheel is called. But, yeah, so anyway, filled up, went into the petrol station. It was busy because it was about 5 o'clock. And got up to the counter. Oh, my God. Couldn't find my EFTPOS card.

And you're searching through your wallet. You can find all of your little loyalty cards. You can find everything. I didn't have my EFTPOS card. I was like, hold there. And there was a line building up behind me. And so the wonderful gentleman behind the counter was like, listen, I will wait for you to go to your car

and find your card. And I was like, oh no, no, it's fine. Just keep serving people. He's like, I can't now, it's up on the screen. And I was like, but you've got another counter, why don't you open up another counter, you can dot between the two. You know, there's a dozen people behind me. There's pressure on you now because there's people behind you

hating you. And I'm like, okay, sorry guys, I just ran out of the car and I'm looking around. I can't find it anywhere. I'm in a mad panic. And then I get back in and I'm like, and he's still waiting there like tapping his fingers. And the other guy behind me is like, can I just uh, he's like, no, no.

I will just serve this gentleman. It was like he was punishing me for something. And he almost could have got on the microphone on the forecourt and gone, sorry, there's a bit of a delay. There's a bald man who can't find his FFOS card. We're just waiting

half an hour for him to find it. And so I... He was like, ooh. And I couldn't find it anywhere and he was like, well,

what I'm going to need you to do is fill out this form with your car registration. And like he was booking me into a police station or something and take your phone out. What was the option?

Like, because you, what did you have to do well I was like I'll go home I'll try and find it and come back and pay obviously he's like well before you leave and so then I had to fill out this painstaking form

but even then he wouldn't open up the other thing behind it feels like there's 59 people standing behind me and they just want to get home I'm having to fill out

this three page form with all my details, my passport numbers. I had that happen at the supermarket, the most embarrassing thing. Through the whole supermarket, got the week's worth of shopping, checked, basically they scanned and everything, put it aside, and then I went,

I don't have my wallet. There's no worse moment. I know, you're like, what do I do? I just don't, yeah. You boomers need Apple Pay. Get Apple Pay on your phone. And you can just pay with your phone. It's the future.

Oh, here we go. I'll set you guys up with it after the show, don't you worry. What is this phone you speak of? This witchcraft. I shall not. It'll solve all your problems. Tell you what, we never had this problem with wars and cars back in the day. That's what I say.

Didn't have to stick a Bowser inside them. A petrol tap. Wake up and smell them. Actually, no, please don't smell them. That's odd. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, Disney and Pixar, they've got a brand new movie. It's called Soul.

It looks awesome. It's coming to Disney Plus on Boxing Day in New Zealand. So if you've got a Disney Plus subscription, you can just watch it. No extra cost, which is awesome. Features the voices of Jamie Foxx, Tina Fey and Graham Norton and Rachel House, who's voicing the character of Terry. You know, you'll know Rachel from Hunt for the Wilder People, Boy, Thor, Ragnarok, and she joins us in the studio right now.

Kia ora. Nice to meet you. Lovely to have you here. When we say our very own, we've only just met you. Yeah. I know. It's weird. I feel like you've, I've been watching you guys for years,

so it feels strange that we're only meeting now, but there you go. I deeply apologise for you having to watch. I'm sorry about that. I'm almost embarrassed that you've watched what we've done. Yeah. We've been watching what you've done, and this is amazing that you're a part of this movie.

It looks incredible. So does voicing for an animated movie, does it mean you can turn up in your pyjamas and Ugg boots? I mean, how's it work? Yeah, I mean, pretty much if that's your sort of vibe. But no, I often get dressed. So that was good. I often put clothes on.

Yeah, I often do get dressed in the morning. Oh, good. After showers. I have showers. I get it. That's how that works. Sometimes I eat. It's called routine, Benny.

Bit of a routine. Well, it's amazing. You know, it's great you can do the job routine well it's amazing you know it's great you can do the job on all four corners of the world did you meet your fellow castmates

did not oh right no and because you know like with Moana I got to I met everyone

on that sort of premiere you guys met Dwayne Johnson I was reading as well hang out in the room with Dwayne Johnson briefly

yeah we just hung out yeah just hung out yeah no met for the premiere. And to be fair, like all that palaver, you know, the kind of red carpet, that's one of my most sort of, my least favourite things. Oh, you don't enjoy it? No.

Oh, really? No way do I enjoy it. Are you an introvert? Yes. What is it? Extroverted introvert. Right. Yeah, yeah.

No, that's me, babe. Yes. What is it? Extroverted introvert. Yeah, yeah. No, that's me, babe. Yep. So meeting all of them on that sort of premiere was quite overwhelming. But in this particular instance, I don't think I'm going to meet anyone, which is a bit sad. It's quite unusual doing a movie with all these amazing people and not having met them. I guess that's just the way of the world, man.

It's just the way of the world. Yeah. Rachel House with us in the new Disney Pixar movie, sold, as we said, an all-star cast. And as you mentioned, you never got to meet them. You've laid down your voice parts. So we want to play a bit of a game with you. Who is your castmate?

We're going to play a little grab. Not from the movie, though, just from other things they've done. And you're going to tell us which one of your castmates these are. Oh, man, come on now. Y'all carry on. Come on now. It's Oscar. No. Can you play it again? These are He sounded like a New Zealander there. He sounds like a bro. Jamie Foxx, second cast member.

That's such a big fail. It is true. You get the attention of the ladies. Graham Norton. Graham Norton, there we go. No, you're back on track. Back on track. Somebody bring me the man.

Now you're getting confident. Now you're getting confident. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who's this? When I die. Oh, that's some old. There's one over there we're getting confident. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who's this? When I die, I'm going to be one of them. It's you. It's Samo Kroni. It's you and Moana.

Yes, mate. Hey, well, you did kind of okay in Who's Your Castmate. Apart from Jamie Foxx, who's not the main. No, but he honestly sounded like he was a bro from here. Now, one thing I find incredible about you, not just what you do on screen, but behind the scenes as well. You're obviously the acting coach for a lot of kids' movies as well, Hunt for the Wilderpeople, Boy as well.

Jojo Rabbit, that must be an awesome thing to be part of. Yeah, no, it is awesome. I mean, I really love doing it with Taika because we have such a shorthand with each other now. 17, you first met Taika, he was 17 or something, was that right? Yeah, he was young. I was young too.

And so have you got a relationship where it's almost like husband, wife or brother and sister? I wouldn't say husband, wife. But it can be brutal. Brother, sister. We're very blunt. And it is that kind of unconditional love which doesn't mean that we don't get grumpy

at each other. That's kind of cool when you know that you're going to be friends regardless but you can actually say things without worrying about offending someone else's feelings, you know. Be honest. I mean in theory.

Yeah, in theory. Yeah, in theory that works. Sometimes my feelings are hurt for a couple of days. Sometimes, yeah, exactly. Well, he cut you from a movie, didn't he? Did he cut you from

Jojo Rabbit? You had a scene and he cut you? He did but honestly, thank goodness he did because it made no sense. It was just like, I put in Rachel in all my films.

I better put her here. Yeah, we've got Rachel House with us in the new Disney Pixar movie Soul. And on New Zealand, we can watch it on Disney Plus on Boxing Day, which is cool. Before you go, I want to see how well you remember some of your characters that you've played over the years. And Rachel House's film work included roles in Whale Rider with Academy Award nominated Keisha Castle-Hughes, where she played the girlfriend of the uncle named... Shiloh. Shiloh, correct.

Well done. Then you acted alongside Jermaine Clement from Flight of the Conchords in Taika Waititi's Eagle vs. Shark, where you played... No idea. Nancy. Nancy. Then another Taika Waititi film, Boy, with James Rolleston,

where you played Aunty. Who had all the jobs. Aunty who had all the jobs. I'll give you that one. It's Gracie, all right? Gracie. Then in 2016, House appeared in Taika Waititi's feature film, Hunt for the Wilderpeople, where she played a real bad egg named?

Paula. Yes. And 2016, Disney animated film, Moana. Yes. House voiced the character of? Grandma Tala. Yes. And 2016, Disney animated film Moana. Yes. House voiced the character of? Grandma Tala. Yes, well done. And 2017, she starred along with Chris Hemsworth in Thor, Ragnarok,

and she played Grandmaster's bodyguard? Topaz. Yes. On fire. Before 2020, where she voiced Disney Plus movie Soul with Jamie Foxx, who she vaguely remembers and Tina Faye. She played the character of? Terry. Convincing. Hey, well, so lovely to meet you and to see you make New Zealand proud what you

do on screen and behind the scenes as well. It's so cool to see you as part of this amazing movie. So thank you for hanging out with us. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Bye. Thanks to Sharesies, New Zealand's fastest growing share platform. Shares made easy.

Now for your weekly update of what sickening, despicable acts Ellen DeGeneres has been up to. Here's Juliette with Spy. Have we got any Ellen news? Unfortunately, no updates on Ellen today. We did a couple of days ago. She moved next to the Markles and Prince Harry and Meghan. She wanted to bully Prince Harry across the fence for being all black. And get them on her show, probably.

But no, no updates on Ellen. But when you think of Billy Ray Cyrus and the Cyrus family, you kind of think back in his old heyday. He was rocking the mullet. And when you think of a mullet, you either think of all black Jack Goodhue or you think of the Cyrus family. Well, for me at least. And Miley Cyrus has now got a bit

of a mullet going on. She's kind of going through a bit of a rock phase. She's just released kind of a rock rocky album. And she said that when asked her it's like genetic that their family grows mullets. She says they're genetically modified to grow mullets in their family. They've all done it.

The dad's done it. Miley's now done it. All of her siblings have done it at some stage in their life. And the reason why she's got this mullet now is that she had bangs and they were growing out in quarantine and she needed a haircut. And her mum was like, I can give you a haircut, but I only know how to do mullets

because I've done your dad's for years. I've done all your siblings for years. And that's why she's ended up with her current mullet. The mullet salon. There's a market for the mullets because I've done your dad's for years. I've done all your siblings for years. And that's why she's ended up with her current mullet. The mullet salon. There's a market for the mullet salon. We spoke to her brother, Brazen Cyrus, who's also a musician. And we saw a photo of him online when he was three or four years old with a mullet that sort of ran halfway down his back.

Oh, it was incredible. We spoke to him about it. That's my dad's pride and joy right there. My mom got to pick the name and my dad got to pick the hair. That's the rule of the house. Now, was this at the time where Billy Ray had his mullet as well? So there was a father-son mullet combo going on? The heyday.

The heyday. Yeah, my older brother, Trace, he had it too. So we were... The whole family of mullets. I love it. I always wanted to grow a rat's tail When I was growing up Do you remember the rat's tail? Yes, that would be so funny on you

You're probably good now Why would it be funny? It would just Do you know what? It would add to your naked mole rat look Because it would give you a tail Like a rat's tail It's a naked mole rat tail We have, my gosh. It's a mole rat's tail.

We have to make this happen. I'll commit to that. It's a long play. It is a long play. Because I don't even know how you even start. I don't know. What's the process of the... Would you start now and then grow it down the back,

or would you just grow your hair out and then eventually you cut it all off? Yeah, I suppose you have to mould it and manipulate it through its formative years, don't you? And I mean, it's not happening over a six-month period. It's a long game. I'll cut off some of my hair and give it to you. Why don't we glue it on?

Yeah. And plait it as well. On Dog Almighty, there was a wonderful gentleman who had a rat's tail that had been growing for years and it almost dreadlocked itself. Yeah. And it ran down his back, didn't it? You were so jealous. I was so jealous of that rat's tail that had been growing for years and it almost dreadlocked itself. Yeah. And it ran down his back. You were so jealous.

I was so jealous of that rat's tail. That rat's tail could talk. Why don't you just collect like the hair on your face or something? I don't know. I've got options.

Solutions. We're trying to help you out. Solutions. Why don't I shave Ben and glue him to me? Oh yeah, Ben can donate some hair as well. In fact, T4487, he'd like to donate some hair to my rat's tail.

We can turn it into a matted mess. And in a little bit more of a heartwarming story, Taylor Swift has donated $18,000 to two financially struggling mums in the States. So there was an article in the Washington Post about people who have faced eviction and unemployment over the coronavirus period. And she went and found them and donated to their GoFundMe accounts.

Being like, you know, you're struggling and there's nothing worse than being a solo mum and having not much money during a tough time. So she's gone and done that. Oh, what a lovely lady. Good on her. What a lovely lady. Even though I wouldn't do that. No, actually, no, I say that back. She probably would.

She'll do it and then she'll take the money off for next year. Making poor life decisions every morning. It's Jodo and Ben on the hits. A couple of nights ago, I went along to the 660 movie. Now, I've had, I enjoyed the movie. It was great. But I've had a bit of a rich history with Amanda, my partner, and I, you know, with food, me trying to bring food into the movie.

It was just food in general in the movie. Well, you're always trying to sneak food into establishments that have food. Yeah, you know, with food, me trying to bring food into the movie theater, or just food in general in the movie theater. Well, you're always trying to sneak food into establishments that have food and kind of frown upon you bringing your own food in. She doesn't like me bringing my own food, my own popcorn, into the movie theater. And we've since found out you shouldn't bring your own popcorn in. That's why they sell it for an expensive price,

but they still sell it there for you to buy. And you found that out when you were being kicked out and removed by security for bringing your own popcorn in. So i don't bring my own popcorn to the movie theater the other day but the other day bootleg popcorn we're watching uh the 660 movie and uh amanda went uh just before it started she was like i'm just gonna whip off do you want anything to drink or eat and she was like oh yeah you can grab me a drink and she came back with a packet of like fruit bursts lollies and we were watching the movie and it was great but you know there's parts where the music's blaring.

There's other parts where the band are talking through some moments. It's very hard to open and eat fruit bursts in a situation where you're trying to listen and you try not to be noisy. They provide you with the world's noisiest food in what needs to be at times the world's quietest environment. And there's nothing more frustrating, I understand,

for people around you that someone being noisy, you try to eat and open their food quietest environment. And there's nothing more frustrating, I understand, for people around you that you're someone being noisy, trying to eat and open their food and eat away. And you try. And the more you think about it, the more you get in your head and you're like, I'm being so loud. I'm chewing loudly. I'm chewing loudly. I had that at my Nana's funeral when I was eating a packet of Pringles

during the service. Apparently snacks at a funeral are frowned upon. So I wanted to do a quick challenge for you right now, John. I've got some foods. I'm going to give it to you. I'm going to see if you can open them and eat them quietly without making any noise. This is a fun game. We've got some

popcorn here. We've got a bag of popcorn. Ben's always got a bag of illegal popcorn on Sam. Yeah, just in case I go into the movies today. Now, does this start from the opening process? Yeah, the opening process. The movie started. We're in a bit right now where it's quite quiet. And we'll see.

It's like super glued shut. Is this the toughest bag of popcorn? I'm just going to go Oh, there's popcorn everywhere. There's quite a lot of noise going on there. You've got to quarter chew, don't you? Yeah. There's quite a lot of noise going on there. So if I said it, she'll be like, shh. You've got to kind of quarter chew, don't you?

Yeah. It's almost like sometimes you need to saliva up your mouth a little bit to make it less. Or how do seagulls feed each other? You know how mother seagulls feed their babies? Oh, yeah. Don't even chew. Just shove it down your esophagus.

Okay, that's good. Amanda brought some fruit bursts the other day. Here you go. You can try and do itophagus. Okay, that's good. Okay. Amanda brought some fruit bursts the other day. Here you go. You can try and do it as a packet of fruit bursts. Okay. If you've just joined us, this is Jono opening up products on the radio. Try not to eat loudly. Unboxing's a thing on the internet, but I don't know if it's quite working on radio.

Okay, and quietly. That was the bag, by the way. Still the bag. Still the bag. Still the bag. Hold on. That's me. Oh, he has it open and up. Now he's using his teeth.

Open it up now. Okay, well done. Well done, you got through that. And because you're going to the movies with me. Jesus, how many products have we opened here? The last one, I bought you a carrot. Classic staple at the movie theatre. Ben, I like my carrots.

A raw carrot. Okay, so try and eat that koala. It's very hard to do. ASMR. Oh, that's that thing on the internet? Yeah. No, I don't know what that means, but I'll laugh politely. Like I do for a lot of this radio show.

Let's just say ASMR might not be NSFW. LOL, ROFL, and other acronyms. Here's a song. We apologise in advance. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. We are fast approaching Christmas, and we thought we'd give you the chance to use the radio as your platform, as your show.

And you can basically call us on 0800THETS, and if you feel that maybe you are chance to use the radio as your platform, as your show. And you can basically call us on 0800THATS and if you feel that maybe you are difficult to buy for and the way that people are like, I don't really know what they want but you can say who you are and just say, hey, I would like this. If anyone's listening, friends or family, this is what I'd like for Christmas.

Hi, it's Sandra in Wellington. If my friends and family are listening, I want a new pair of skins. For the gymnasium. For performance ties. My legs haven't been performing at an optimum capacity this year. Just some more performance out of those legs in 2021, and that's what I'd like.

Because it is hard to buy for people, and I find the older people are, the more difficult they become to buy for. Because you're like, my dad, for example. The guy's led a life. He's probably got most of the stuff that he needs. To survive. You know, last year I got him like a novelty pad,

which was a golf putting green. And then the pen was a golf putter. And the rubber was a golf ball. And I'm like, what? You've really checked. What's he going to do with it? Yeah. You know, your dad does the same, Kevin Boyce.

I feel like he's a one-stop shop type of guy. Like sometimes he gets a voucher. I appreciate a voucher. I'm one of these people that really like a voucher. But then he was like, but then I feel like he's like, oh,

I can't just give him a voucher. So while I'm at the counter, I'll grab, what was that thing we had, we plugged in? It was like- Oh, it was a fan,

a USB fan, wasn't it? Yeah. Oh no, it was like a leaf blower that was basically good to gently blow the dust off your computer. A mini one.

A mini one, yeah. Yeah. So I felt like he saw that and put that in as well. That's definitely a counter add-on, isn't it? Yeah, I know. It's like the chewing gum and chocolate bars at the supermarket. I appreciated it. You know, so we're going to give you guys the opportunity right now, 4487 on the text

or 0100thehits. The radio station is yours. Just say who you are. And if your friends and family are listening, you can say what you want. Like Jono, you can say, Hi, I'm Jono Pryor. I would like a wig or a hat. I knew he was going to say that.

I knew it was going to be hair-related content. I mean, people might not know that you'd like a bat. Hi, I'm Ben Boyce. I'd like an extra 7 to 10 kgs. Just to make me the size and weight of a normal human being. We've already got some early ones. Shall we take one? Lucy is on the air from Auckland.

Lucy, the not-so-secret Santa line you're difficult to buy for. Oh, no, Ben's going, don't talk to Lucy. She's done some terrible things. We can't talk to Lucy. She was about to admit to some crimes. She robbed a bank last week. Okay, so 800, the hits. The not-so-secret Santa line is open right now.

You tell us if you're the difficult person to buy for. Sarah, welcome to New Zealand's breakfast. You're difficult to buy for, says... Not really. I feel like I kind of laid out what I want. Okay, so you just want to double down on it, if anything. Use this as another platform to tell your friends and family what you want. Exactly.

I like anything relaxing, so a facial voucher would be amazing. Ben would hate that. You would hate a relaxing facial. Imagine you getting a facial. Yeah. No, not a relaxing, not a massage. Massage is not for me. It makes me tense even thinking about it.

So if you know Sarah, don't worry about giving your last name. Just if there's a Sarah in your life, get them a facial this Christmas. Thank you very much, Sarah. We'll head to Christchurch. Maureen and Kate, you're on New Zealand's Breakfast. You're difficult to buy for, they tell us. Yes, good morning. How are you?

We're doing well. You tell us. What do you want your friends to buy you? I'm stuck with my kids playing. Well, essentially giving me crafts and everything for Christmas. What I want is just new gardening equipment. Get out in the garden this summer. Kids don't give you good presents.

They don't. It's a one-way street when it comes to present time at Christmas with the children, doesn't it? When has a kid ever given you anything decent for Christmas? Oh, we tried the Secret Santa with the kids last year and we all gave them a little bit of money so they all could spend. We all drew someone. That was quite fun, you know.

So they actually did all right. What did they get you? Oh, now I say they did all right. I can all drew someone. That was quite fun. They actually did all right. What did they get you? Now I say they did all right, I can't actually remember. So memorable. I remember going, I guess she did all right. Now I can't remember what it was.

But he gave her a present. He gave her a memorable present. Whatever that present was, I'd live on. I have cherished that present. Every day I think about that present. What was that present again? Len, you're on the air from Pukekohe.

Welcome. You're a difficult person to buy for. What do you want your? Len, you're on the air from Pukekohe. Welcome. You're a difficult person to buy for. What do you want your friends and family to get you this Christmas? Bloody glasses. Bloody sunglasses.

Oh, sunglasses. So I can watch outfish you, Jono. So you can outfish, well listen, I'm not hard to outfish. No, mate, you can watch you

pasty burn. I love that. I like that. I know you're coming hot. Yeah, Jomo, it's great. Len is like saying nothing aggressive, but sounds very threatening. Oh, well.

Love you, mate. Love you, Len. Have a good Christmas, Boots. You too, mate. Want to get some bloody glasses. Bloody outfish you. You think you can outfish Len? No way.

That was very funny. Kyle, welcome. He's 12 years old. Apparently you're hard to buy for, Kyle and Taranaki. What do you want Mum and Dad to get you this Christmas? Kyle. Yes? Hey, what do you want this Christmas, mate?

A PS5 and some games. Okay, all right. So if you're in Kyle's life, just say a classic PS5 and some games. Yeah, no, very popular. The PS5 is this year, aren't they? What I've just realised is we haven't really stipulated who these people are. So a lot of people, some of the Kyles.

Is that Kyle that I know? Maybe it was. Len told me to get him some bloody glasses. So all these Lens are going to be getting glasses. Well, anyway, I think hopefully that worked and it acted as some sort of helpful service for people you're struggling to buy for. It is Christmas time. Merry Christmas

to you. Like starting your day with Panda Eyes. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Scrolling through your feed. Just like his news hero, Paddy Gower on weed. We think he might be as well. We're just waiting for the test to come through from the Workplace Testing Agency. Here's Ben Boyce

with Scrolling Through Your Feet. Yesterday we mentioned we love a list. This time of year, don't we? We love a list of people announcing the most Google searches, the best of the year, all those sorts of stuff. It's what drags your run-of-the-mill radio show across the finish line. It's what

drags your breakfast TV across the finish line. Websites. You know, it's good content to just pull you over those last two weeks of December. And we saw this last night. We're like, we need to mention this in the morning. A new list. But this is awesome for New Zealand, for Jacinda Ardern, our Prime Minister. According to Forbes magazine, she's the 32nd most powerful woman in the world.

And she's gone up six places since the previous year, which is pretty awesome. Ahead of the Queen. Yeah, Queen's 46th. So more powerful than the Queen, according to Forbes magazine. Do you reckon when Clark and her have a marital discussion, she's like, well, you know, you're having a confrontation with the 32nd most powerful person in the world. I've got Forbes magazine here.

Should I have a look? Hold on, should I just have a look here? You're on the list. No, you're not on the list. No, you're not on the list. No, I'm on the list. Oh, that's all. I'll be doing it.

So that would end every argument. Yeah. Are you going to argue with the 32nd most powerful person? I can see the queen here, but she's behind me. I can see that. The only people she'll lose arguments to, there's only 31 other people in the world she could lose an argument to. Yeah, Angela Merkel, who's the German Chancellor.

She's number one on the Forbes list. Is she number one? Yeah, on the Forbes list. She's the most powerful person in the world. She's also a powerful woman in the world. Held the title last year as well. What about Kamala Harris? She'd be in there, surely.

Yeah, well, I'm sure she'd be in there somewhere, mate, but I can't place it. Oh, here we go. Why do you always come up with, like... Is she number two? Okay, there you go. Classic beard voice. No follow-up questions.

You need to tell me what questions I'm allowed. Like North Korea. There's sanctioned questions and there's unsanctioned questions. Which you're able to answer and which you're not. I haven't done a rich, I haven't done a thesis on the Forbes magazine, the most powerful woman. Who's number 17? Yeah, all right, I'm moving on.

And Home Alone, it's a great Christmas movie. There's also Home Alone 2 and Home Alone 3. I don't know if you know that. I don't know how they ended up getting a trilogy. That just sort of falls into the parental negligence category if they keep losing him. But if you have seen Home Alone 2, the classic movie, there's a character known as the Pigeon Lady,

and she's quite an integral character in the movie. She helps Kevin McCauley Culkin out. And there's people on social media saying, is she Piers Morgan, the UK, the British, he's a TV radio host. He's like the Mike Hosking of Britain, basically. He's quite opinionated, right? Yeah, he is, he is. And you look at the picture and the resemblance is

uncanny and it's even hit their show in the UK. Piers Morgan had this to say. Why does this keep coming around? Because frankly, it is the best picture. That is not me frankly, it is the best picture. That is not me. I'm not the bag lady in Home Alone 2.

Having to publicly deny he's not the bag lady in Home Alone 2. That is not me. You were watching Home Alone 1 last night. I was with Oscar, my son. It's a great movie. Oh, yeah, they love it. And it's timeless, isn't it? Just really has stood the test of time.

But there are a few things that he I was like, well, this could have been all solved with a cell phone. Yeah. First, give the mum and Kevin a cell phone or even internet or something. They would have solved that. BTW, you left me at home at the airport. Okay, we'll delay the flight. We'll go back. I'm coming back. There's some burglars in there. You know, a lot of stuff. It feels

like, yeah, like I was reading before, he calls pizza. He orders pizza somehow, but he couldn't get in touch with authorities or his parents. You know, there's all these, but you just enjoy it because it's a Christmas movie. And from the burglars POV, they really wanted to get into that house. They did.

Even after the first, I think the first stair slip, which was, you know, catastrophic. Could have broken a neck, lower spine injuries, you know, could have left them paralysed. I would have gone, hey, let's go on to the next house. Or probably more importantly, let's take you to the AD and just check out. Maybe it's one of those situations you get determined. You're like, no, I'm going to do this.

Because you're right, there's other houses on the street that could have just moved on. I mean, the steaming hot doorknob, you know, the red hot, lava hot doorknob. At that point, I would be like, I'm out, I'm out. We've already robbed four houses in the street. Why this one? Why are we so fixated on this house? They're very determined. And what I didn't realise until recently was when Kevin McCauley-Culkin has an accident near the start,

like I think he spills the drink on the table or whatever, they're cleaning up, and his ticket, his plane ticket goes into the bin, which I didn't really observe until someone pointed that out so that's why when they get to the airport they don't have a ticket for him so they don't realise he's not there. And he did a miraculous, so he has the whole evening of shenanigans

and sends the robbers across the road. They sort of hang him up on a hook, he's almost caught and then the scary guy who he thinks is the scary guy comes in and whacks him with the spade. Oh, that's right. He just pulls Kevin down from the hook

and just says, oh, go back home, mate. I'll go back home. Home alone? Yeah. Continue on living by yourself? I know. And Kevin's out and about. He's doing lots of stuff out and about.

Never once does he go to the police. Anyway. And his clean-up job before the family gets home. Outstanding. Oh, yeah. I mean, there's tar walked through the house, blood. There's a spider wandering around. No one even found the spider.

I know. What an amazing job. The only room he doesn't clean up is Buzz's room. And that's our little breakdown of Home Alone. Next on the show, the A to Z of New Zealand. We could be coming for your town next after 6.60 on the hits. Low in calories and low in laughs. It's Jono and Ben on the hits.

The A to Z of New Zealand. We are calling every town and city in New Zealand. We've made it our show's mission, and we're slowly making our way around in New Zealand. We're in the Ks. After about nine months, we've made our way from A to K alphabetically. Yeah, do you know we've harassed and inconvenienced probably around about 193 people, I think.

Six of those towns we're probably not welcome back in. And the remainder probably forgot that we called. So that's the impact that the A to Z of New Zealand is having on Aotearoa. But today we're heading to Kauponga, which is in the Taranaki region. They always say Taranaki hardcore. There's even a TV show now called Taranaki hardcore. There is a TV show, yeah. I'm far too softcore to live in Taranaki hardcore,

but it's a wonderful part of New Zealand in Kaupunga. They say it's a small town with a big heart, unlike Auckland, which is a big town with a cold heart. And we're about to go through to the local Foursquare. Hello, Kaupunga Foursquare, Ben speaking. Hi, Ben. It's Jono and Ben from the Hits radio station. Oh, how's it going?

Double Ben's, mate. Oh, yeah, too many Bens. Double Bens, two Bens. Who am I speaking to? Which Ben am I talking to? I'm already confused. But how are you? I'm good, mate.

How are you? We're very well. We've got a hold of Carponga. Carponga, yep. Yep, this is the A to Z of New Zealand. We phone every town and city in this fine nation of ours. And we're into the Ks. We're deep inside the Ks.

We're in a K hole right now. And you, my friend, are a representative of Ka Ponga. Oh, nice. I thought that was going to lead on to more. They probably got the reaction it deserved, to be honest, when we call. But what's good to do in your town? Kaupunga, we've got a pub. It's the gateway to Mount Taranaki.

So you can go up the mountain if it's sunny. You don't want to go up there when it's snowing. There's a good little local tip there. We've got Hollard Gardens, which is cool. The Foursquare in Kaupunga, it's the place to be. Yeah, well, this is where you are right now. Exactly. How long have you worked at the Foursquare in Carponga, it's the place to be. Yeah, well, this is where you are right now. Exactly, yeah. How long have you worked at the Foursquare?

Two and a half years now, nearly three. Have you hit management status yet? Yes, yes. It's a quick rise up the ranks, isn't it? Yeah, well, we actually bought it a couple of years ago. Oh, you own it? Yeah, me and my wife, Molly. Oh, lovely.

A lot of people wanting to get into the supermarket game start off with four squares, don't they? They do, yes. That's the path. Oh, is it? All right. So much like your place is the gateway to Mount Taranaki, four squares is the gateway to supermarkets, apparently. The New World and the Pack and Save. Is that your dream, to own a New World or Pack and Save?

One day. We're a bit far away yet. Running a four square I imagine you're seven days a week. You'd never have a break would you? We're pretty lucky

with our staff. We've got great lovely ladies here that help us out and we all work together as a team. Oh great. And that's why

we love car ponga. What you don't know is you're about to be part of an ad. Okay. Welcome to the beautiful, tranquil... Kāponga. When you come to visit, you simply must check out the... The local four square.

And as the locals always say... Come to Kāponga, come to the mountain, have a great time. And as the locals always say... Come to Karponga, come to the mountain, have a great time. If you haven't visited this beautiful location, it will have you saying... Wow, that was a great place to visit. And once you've said that, this special place of paradise will have you uttering more words like... Man, I can't wait to come back to Karponga. And once those words have left your mouth,

believe it or not, further words will fall from your mouth. Shit, after we go back a second time, we'll go back a third. But be sure to pop in so the locals can tell you the town slogan. Karponga, gateway to Mount Taranaki. Oh, well done, Ben. Very good. You did a great job. Oh, thanks, guys.

Right on the spot. Yeah, it's a thriving little community, so. Hey, good on you. Hey, well, thank you so much for your time. You look after the four square, you look after the mountain, and most importantly, you know what I want you to look after? What's that? Yourself.

Oh, thanks, guys. All right, love you, Ben. Have a lovely day. See you, mate. Have a lovely day. Want more Jono and Ben? You can. Oh, thanks, guys. All right. Love you, Ben. Have a lovely day. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram.

Hey, yesterday I was having a coffee in the afternoon. Now, a friend of mine walked in, and he's like, can I have a sip of that? A coffee? Can I have a sip of mine walked in and he's like, can I have a sip of that? A coffee? Can I have a sip of coffee? And he's like, no lips. No lips, small sips.

And I was like, no lips, small sips. And no lips, small sips never ends up being small sips. That's what you'd say like at primary school, when you didn't want to share someone's drink, but you didn't touch it on your lips, right? Yeah, I mean, the only time I'd ever want to share a hot drink would be purely for survival purposes. If I was on a plane and it crashed into the Andes Mountains or something,

even then I'd be like, mate, you could probably freeze to death. Well, especially someone that's not immediate family. Like maybe, you know, you might go, oh, can I try your drink? If you've got something, you order something new, you might want to try someone's drink, but yeah. And plus, who is satisfied, ever satisfied with a single sip of hot coffee? Was it a bowl latte? Because my mum, Jenny, she loves bowl latte.

She does. Her and Paula Bennett. There's enough for like nine or ten people to enjoy a coffee from her. In that occasion, you could share it with a whole dozen people, maybe. She's got litres of latte, doesn't she? And a single shot, too. She's like, oh, I couldn't have a double shot. So I'll just have a single shot, bowl latte.

So it's just five litres of milk with a little taster of coffee. Yeah. It's like, it's so much. I go to the cafe, it's like a three-day experience. It's like, oh, you've just got to finish that bowl of latte. She ends up drinking it like a cow's out of a trough. No one needs that much liquid, do they? No, they don't.

But yeah, it was an odd thing. And especially in the current environment, even sharing a drink. Yeah. Felt like an odd call. Had he never tried your type of coffee? You like flat whites, don't you? Yeah. So had he never tried a flat white before?

No, he tried flat white. I don't know if he tried flat white from that cafe. And it was almost like, you know, they bring out wine and they're like, would you like to taste it? Yeah, that doesn't happen with coffee. You know what you're getting. Do you find this also, speaking of sharing food, I had this happen with, sometimes we'll go out, you can go for a drink with my wife Amanda,

and then we'll be like, oh, I'll get some food, I'm hungry. She's like, I'm not hungry, I'm fine. And then when your food comes out, she's like, I'll just have a little bit. All of a sudden they've developed an insatiable appetite. Just a little bit of this, and then ends up eating. You're like, you said you weren't hungry. You could have ordered something. It's like, oh. this. And then he ends up eating. You're like, you said you weren't hungry. You could have ordered something.

It's like, oh. Do you do that, Juliet? Absolutely. It runs. It's part of the female body, that tactic. What's the thought process behind that? Just out of interest. You don't want a full meal.

But you want someone else's meal. But you also just want to, like, snacking is just such a fun activity. And you're just like, oh, I'm just going to have a little bit. And then when you start, you can't stop. Yeah, well, that's the thing. then when you start, you can't stop. Yeah, well, that's the thing. Sometimes when you do, you try to have something. It's like potato chips or something.

Once you have one, you're like, oh, I'm going to go back for more. Well, can I just say on behalf of our side of the fence, it's very frustrating. Yeah. And can I say on our side of the fence, we're very appreciative. Yeah. Well, thank you. It's almost like by the time you finish,

I might as well just order another meal. Yeah, we could order two meals. Because now I'm not satisfied. You're probably not satisfied. No, no one's happy. We could have now added 30 minutes to our time out. Exactly. There we go, a little bit of moaning before 7 o'clock there from the guys.

Wake up full of shame. Wake up with these guys. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Kia ora, I'm Ash Thomas, and this is the B***ing News. Yes, producer Juliet beeps out certain words from news headlines around the world and there's more beeps in this than an

episode of The Real Housewives. What have we got today, Juju? Alright, ready for your first story. Italy's Forrest Gump. Man a***** wife and walks 450 kilometres to cool off. I see what you've done there. Very appropriately placed censoring. You're welcome. Listen, man does something to wife then walks 450 kilometres to cool off. I see what you've done there. Very appropriately placed censoring. You're welcome. Listen, man does something

to wife then walks 450 kilometres to cool off. I'm going to say man openly communicates to wife and explains he's going for a quick walk and he'll see her in two years. Oh, right. I don't know. Forrest Gump? Yeah. He's given her a box of chocolates?

I don't know. What's he done? Italy's Forrest Gump. Man argues with wife and walks 450 kilometres to cool off. Wow. You've seen Forrest Gump though, right?

Yeah, when he just keeps running and runs. He just runs and runs and runs and runs. Dear friend of ours thought that was a documentary but anyway. Yes, that's right.

Wonderful Sharon. For many years her uncle had told her it was a documentary and she didn't think otherwise. Very well shot documentary. And with the same guy who's been in many other movies. Isn't that the guy from Castaway?

Yeah. In Philadelphia? From Bic. Jesus, he's led a life. Sounds like Woody from Toy Story. But this guy, he then also got caught because he was breaching lockdown rules, conveniently. So he got fined.

And he was walking about 65 kilometres a day. And then when police found him, he was like, oh, I'm fine, I'm just a little tired. Gee whiz. He walked the distance. So to put that in perspective, that's pretty much from Auckland to Palmerston North. Or from Nelson to Christchurch.

Just to cool off. It's about a four-hour drive, if you were to drive that. Yeah. So that'd take you a wee while. I wonder what the wife's thinking. How did he get back? Did the police have to take him back? I don't know.

It doesn't say, so you'd think so. But he did it to cool off. But if anything, your body temperature would be going up. Yeah, true. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, that's a good observation. I don't know. We're thinking too deeply about it. When was he going to stop? If the police didn't get him, when was's a good observation. I don't know, we're thinking too deeply about it.

When was he going to stop? If the police didn't get him, when was he going to stop? I don't know, he probably would have walked to the edge of Italy and started swimming. Caught his wife. Can you come pick me up? Oh, she'd be furious. You walked how far?

And now you want me to pick you up? Yeah. Next story. Cabin crew turn to... to make money during pandemic. I'm going to say cabin crew turn to online scamming to make money. Oh, that's a good make some money. I reckon I love the way the cabin crew turn to online scamming to make money. Oh, that's a good way to make some money. I reckon I love the way the cabin crew point out where the doors are on the plane.

Like, I've never seen where the doors are, so I reckon they go around businesses just pointing out where the exits are. That's a good tip. That'd be quite useful. Yeah, it would be. Doors are there. You're like, oh, thank you. I can go back out that one.

Now, if you don't know what OnlyFans is, it's basically a service where you users pay the content creators for content, and it kind of turned into a naughty place to go and view, you know, you pay to view naughty images, but the

cabin crew, they're not going full-blown naughty, they're just sending photos of their leg and their work tights and their cabin uniform in sort of sultry positions and a little bit sexy. You remember flying? You remember planes? Yeah.

You want some more? I'm going to show you my hat. You want a little bit of this? Do you want my flight badge? Oh yeah, I remember flying. Literally, so that's what some of them are turning to, to get a little bit of extra money. I mean, they're getting creative, and it's still in the realm of their work,

so good on them. If you want me to say, please, sir, can you stop reclining your seat? I can. Would you like some lollies? And the last one. Ranked as one of the most bizarre foods in the world. Tinned asparagus.

You came out the bat real quickly. Tinned asparagus is a bizarre food. Oh, look, I love asparagus, fresh asparagus. You came out the bat real quickly. Tinned asparagus is a bizarre food. Oh, look, I love asparagus, fresh asparagus, but tinned asparagus, there's no place, no place. Okay, okay. I'm going to say those weird protein meat bars from the petrol station. That's a bizarre food. You eat those and you're like, what's just gone in my mouth?

What is this? Vegemite on toast ranked as one of the most bizarre foods in the world. I get it. I mean, I enjoy it, but I feel like it's an acquired taste. And particularly in here in New Zealand, Australia, we enjoy it, but we love making people from overseas try it. I know. But we always give them spoonfuls.

And it's not the way to like, you really need to get the ratio right. The thing that I find weird was I looked up the other bizarre, it's like the top 20 list, and the things that are on there, there's a cheese infested with live maggots, grilled cow udder, cooked tuna eyeballs. Oh, that's the thing. Vegemite's in there. And then Vegemite is in there,

along with all these other ones that are on the same sort of realm. Did bats make the top 20? Yeah, I think some sort of bat's shoe came in there as well. And where are you winning? We're winning this. Vege make the top 20? Yeah, I think some sort of bats shoe came in there as well. And we're winning. We're winning this. Vegemite, wow. Yeah, it's really bizarre. And Marmite doesn't make the...

No, I don't think so. Which is weird because they kind of taste the same, but you know. Do they? Well, we love our yeasty spreads. So when you say I'm about to have a yeasty spread

on toast, you're like, I can see. It doesn't sound good when you break it down. I can see what the world's judging. Exactly, and that's the news and beeps. Start your day the wrong way. It's Jono and Ben on my hits.

Bye. Thanks to Sharesies, New Zealand's fastest growing share platform. Shares made easy. Now to our little adopted daughter, Juliet, who doesn't listen to anything we have to say because we're not her real parents with Spy. Thanks very much.

So do you remember this old Kiwi classic? Such a great one. So good. Now as TikTok is doing with a lot of songs, it's bringing it back. So there's a new challenge sort of going viral on TikTok which is making this song, this Kiwi song by OMC a lot more popular and back in the charts kind of like it did with Dreams. And it's kind of, the challenge is basically...

Is it bizarre? It is very bizarre. It better be bizarre. It's bizarre to explain. I don't know how I would sort of explain it. It's kind of like a little video of someone accusing someone else of doing something cheeky and then catching them out. And it's like, oh, how bizarre, how bizarre that that happened.

Yeah, but one of the person kind of knows what's going on, like, oh, it's a coincidence. And then it's like, how bizarre, how bizarre, a little knowing look to camera sort of thing. Oh, like when I scratched your car in the car park and you didn't know about it. Yeah, yeah. And you went, hey, did you scratch the car?

Yeah, you'd be like, oh, I don't know how that happened, look to camera, how bizarre. Yeah. That would be it. Great example. It's exactly what happened in the garage. Yeah, right. So you understood it and how that happened. No, no, I don't. Well, that's bizarre. That is hell bizarre, how bizarre. Yeah, that would be it. Great example. It's exactly what happened in the garage. Yeah, right. So you still don't know how that happened?

No, no, I don't. Well, that's bizarre. That is hell bizarre. Hell bizarre. But do you think music, we just need to stop recording new music and just slowly work our way back? It seems what the trend is happening now. Yeah, you're right.

Well, because there's so many songs you forget. I mean, that song was so good. I mean, number one in New Zealand, 1995, I was looking at, went around the world. It was a huge hit. Two billion hits right now on TikTok right now. Really? Wow.

Two billion. Two billion, yeah. Oh, my God. I didn't even realise there were two billion people on TikTok. Two billion seems like an extraordinary number. Two billion. Guys, please double check your facts. That's a bizarre fact isn't it

Someone might have that fact wrong How bizarre That's a lot of people You look like a lot of people Anyway while Ben flusters around And tries to check that But you were certainly going to work our way back Featuring this song

Racking up 2 billion views on TikTok It says on the NZ Herald. 2 billion? Oh wow. Well done Paulie Fumata. That seems like a lot. I don't know. Yeah right I question that but it does say 2 billion. Anyway we'll be doing TikToks to Mozart

and Beethoven the way this is going and then the biblical hymns as well. Then we can go back to making new music. That'll be a wee while away. And celebrities are getting involved in a viral meme challenge called hashtag my elf. And so elf on the shelf, which is something that happens every December,

elves come and visit homes with little setups and things like that. But it's rhyming the elf on the shelf and it goes, you've heard of elf on the shelf, now get ready for blah, blah, blah on a blah, blah, blah. So it'd be like

Ben on a hen, which we've done. We made one of those on the hits breakfast thing, Ben on a hen. Or Boyce, Ben Boyce, Boyce on a Joyce, which would be his mother-in-law.

You're really pushing this narrative, aren't you? Me and my mother-in-law. Joyce Boyce. We made a Jono on a Bono or a Bono on a Jono. Yeah, that was good. You had me straddlingo on a Jono. Yeah, that was good. You had me straddling Bono from U2.

Yeah, it was good fun. Pryor on a fire. That's a good one. Could be burning. I like that. Like a witch. But you've had Sandy and... Juliet Rothel on a brothel.

Oh, yes. Do you want to say your last name's pronounced like a brothel? Sitting on top of the roof. The brothel roof. I'm not saying you're... Anyway, not in pronounced like a brothel? Like brothel? Rothel, yeah. Oh, there it is. Sitting on top of the roof. The brothel roof. Yeah. I'm not saying you're, anyway, not in the brothel. Not in the brothel.

On top of it. If you want to, that's fine. You know? Yeah, that's all good. But you've got Sandy and Danny on Reese Witherspoon, so it's Grease on Reese. Then there's Amy Schumer on Heidi Klum, so Schum on Klum. Oh, that's stretching, surely, a little bit, yeah. And then Tony Stark on Mark Ruffalo,

Stark on Mark, and then Tom Hanks on Elizabeth Banks, Hanks on Banks. Oh, these are good. So, yeah, they're all now becoming a thing, hashtag MyAlf, so people are doing their own one, which is quite fun. I hear it's Christmas time. And yeah, but I would like to say that we were early on that. We did this like a week ago. Too early.

Did we strike too early? Maybe we did. Maybe we need to get Rothel on a brothel out there. Have another stab. And Pryor on a fire. Pryor on a fire. We won't do Boys on a Joy still. And that's five

more you can check out the hits.co.nz. Like starting your day without your morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Why is it going to be a good day for you?

We'd love to hear from you right now. It can be big, it can be small, it doesn't matter. We just love to hear from you right now. It can be big, it can be small, it doesn't matter. We'd just love to hear from you on 0800 The Hitsing. And before we get into it, can we give a quick shout-out to All Black Cody Taylor. All Blacks are in quarantine at the moment. He's decided tomorrow to try and cycle on his exercise in his room for 12 hours non-stop to raise money.

He's got a Give A Little page for Kids Can New Zealand. He's been thinking he feels quite privileged in his life to do what he gets to do. So he wants to give back. So it's a pretty awesome thing he's doing tomorrow. What a wonderful thing to do. And Ben Boyce will be doing that for 14 hours too tomorrow from tomorrow morning. Alright, just to go one better than that. What a wonderful thing.

As soon as he stops, I'll just go a little bit further. It's going to be a good day, Nicky and Josh. You tell us why in Lower Hutt. Yeah, Joshie, why is it going to be a good day? Becausey and Josh. You tell us why in Lower Hutt. Yeah, Joshy, why is it going to be a good day? Because I'm going to the pool and the pool has a slide. You're going to the pool and the pool has a slide, bro. When you're that age, age four, a pool with a slide is... It's the best thing ever, right?

Oh, my God. It's like an unlimited bar tab when you're older. Yeah, it is. You're pretty pumped, aren't you? Oh, that'll be awesome. You guys enjoy that. You hold the line and we'll find something for you as well. Yeah, it is. You're pretty pumped, aren't you? Oh, that'd be awesome. You guys enjoy that. You hold the line and we'll find something

for you as well. Have a great Christmas, guys and enjoy that slide. See you, Nicky and Josh. Thank you too. You don't go down enough slides into pools. You know,

it's always so much fun. And you stop it at a certain age, don't you? Oh, but yeah, if you get the opportunity, it's great. It's going to be a good day for me. I made myself do some squats

on the weekend and my buttocks have just recovered. I've been walking like I've had ice down my trousers for three days. It really does, eh? The old buttocks, they can hurt. I couldn't even sit properly on this chair for three days. Oh, really?

It's the first squats I've done in maybe 19 years. You pushed yourself a bit too far. I did three. Thank you so much for listening to the show. Tomorrow on the program, Geordie Barrett, All Black. Speaking of All Blacks in quarantine, he's going to join us after 7 o'clock. Yeah, head to the Black Clash in Christchurch next year. You have yourself a great day.

We'll catch you tomorrow from 6. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from sex on The Hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast. Friends of Skinny.