Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - February 15 - Ben Messed Up Big Time On Valentine's Day...

Episode Date: February 14, 2021

Hello and happy Monday, or is it a happy Monday...? Auckland's back to Level 3 and the rest of the country is at Level 2. Hopefully, everyone is feeling ok, we've got faith that we can nip this outbreak in the bud! Hopefully, our show can provide a bit of distraction or relief from what's going on! We were joined by Stan Walker, who has a new reality TV show out tonight on TVNZ 2 at 8.30pm, called The Walkers. Ben also messed up on Valentine's day yesterday, so he used Stan's singing skills to redeem himself in front of his wife! Also, we caught up with Simon Trotter, the general manager of Antarctica Operations, to talk about the fact that an Antarctic Ute is for sale! And as Jono said "I wonder how many emperor penguins that ute ran over down there"... ouch. Enjoy the show!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome to the podcast on a Monday, a bit of a surreal Monday here in New Zealand at the moment because as of our international listeners who tune in, welcome.

New Zealand's gone. The alert levels have changed in Auckland. It's pretty much gone into a three-day lockdown around New Zealand. Now to our UK audience. They're like, oh, poor New Zealand. A three-day lockdown. We've been here for months and months. Literally an entire year lockdown, which is

a good reminder. These sorts of moments are a good reminder these sorts of moments are a good reminder team of 5 million don't slip up yeah be kind okay you being kind to people

I'm trying to be kind who are you kind to what was the last thing you were kind to Max you're doing a great job plugging in that thing what are you plugging in a light

a light you're doing a great job plugging in that light Max keep it up that was kind that was kind so kind funny eh the mask usage is an interesting one A light. A light. You did a great job plugging in that light, Max. Keep it up. That was kind. That was kind. That was kind, yeah. Funny, eh?

The mask usage is an interesting one. I was telling you just before we started recording the introduction for this, my father, John Pryor, is here. Quite, what would you say, susceptible individual. He's got to be cautious around it, yeah. He's had a triple bypass and stuff. Quadruple bypass, actually, John. So he's quite chesty and can get affected by know, affected by colds and things like that.

I like to think that they've tried four different hearts on him. That's what I imagine with quadruple. No, that one didn't work. No, no, triple? No, four. Yeah. No. And do you know the interesting thing about that is they take a vein

from your leg, from your ankle, all the way up to your groin. Oh, really? And they put that in. Oh, wow. They do some stuff with that. Don't ask me what they're doing, but that's what they're doing with that stuff. But yeah, anyway, so my point of my story was yesterday afternoon, when lockdown was not in effect, I took him to the supermarket,

and my wife's like, you've got to wear a mask, John Pryor, because he's susceptible. He was the only one in the supermarket of about, I would have said there was probably 300 people in the supermarket. Well, yeah, Sunday. This was before the announcement, so it was busy on a Sunday. Normally, isn't it? Because everyone's getting prepared for the supermarket of about, I would have said there was probably 300 people in the supermarket. Well, yeah, Sunday. This was before the announcement, so it was busy on a Sunday normally, isn't it? Because everyone's getting prepared for the week of work and school and that. And then just a few hours later, the supermarket was getting punished by thousands of people, I dare say mostly in masks.

Well, I was surprised to see on the pictures I've seen online, not as many wearing it. Although today you have to, out and about. Did you go and panic purchase no I didn't they so resisted their temptation it makes you think about it

though as soon as you see there's no bread you're like oh jeez is there going to be bread in a few days time

now don't panic don't panic don't you have to go out there's plenty of supplies it's there it's there

because I've seen these pictures of empty shelves are you saying that because there's not enough supplies flour

I need flour I've never baked anything for the last six months for some reason I feel like I need to get some flour. You know, like flour.

Do you know how easily I bought? You wanted me to do that joke for Valentine's Day, getting two packets of flour and giving flowers. So I bought some flour. Oh, you got flour. Mate, you should give that away tomorrow. Bring it in. Give it away.

The baking I could do if I wanted, even though, like you say, I haven't done it in 10 years. I could. It's just good to know you can. You can. And I can wipe my bottom at any moment. There's so much toilet paper. My house is just toilet paper. Now, we've got a big show for you today.

Stan Walker joined us. What are we, past tense? Yeah, we are past tense. Oh, you want to try this? Oh, so it's upcoming. Yeah, I see what you're saying. Ahead of his reality TV show that starts tonight on TVNZ2. As well as that, you fell over on...

You got angry at him. Ben starts... I did, actually. Make sure you don't miss that, because Ben starts flaring up at Stan Walker. Hang up on him. Hang up on him. For no reason.

As well as that, Jono fell over on an escalator, embarrassed himself over the weekend. And Antarctica, there's something that's been sold that's been to Antarctica that you could buy. Really interesting item. That's all on the podcast. Enjoy. Two dads just trying to fill some airtime.

Some might say it's pointless, but the main thing is it fills in some airtime for us. That is the main thing. General and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Hot weather all over the country in the weekend. Things are not as great today. A little bit of rain around. But over the weekend, we went to a mate's swimming pool. Took the kids over there for a bit of a swim.

Is there a plaster floating around in it? Oh, no. There's always, every time I go to a pool, there's always just a... Oh, the public pools when you see a plaster floating. You're like... But we did the whole thing. I love it when it's got the weepy little red thing

in the pad. Stop, stop. Just the... Stop. Nothing quite like swimming in a pool full of plasters. Yeah, but you did the whole thing where you went over there to my mate's place because they just got out. You're like, what's it like?

And it's like, oh, it's refreshing. It's great when you get in. Yeah. And you get in and it's like, oh, it's a bit colder. Very New Zealand thing, isn't it? Yeah. But I don't know if you notice if you go swimming with your kids, you know, when you're standing out of the pool, they kind of, you know, they don't want anything to do with you. But as soon as you get in the pool, you are like the jungle gym.

They're climbing on, they're jumping off. They're like, I was like, what is this? Look at me. Look at the size of me. I'm barely able to keep myself above the water. If anything, they should be holding you up, poor little fella. That's what I think. Jeez.

Every time I go, I think Oscar, my son, his main goal is to just drown me. Like that's his main focus. How long can I keep this man underwater for until he sort of slowly loses consciousness? But I always get out before the kids, because kids have no thermostat. Kids just, they just keep going. They could go for five hours,

couldn't they, non-stop. And you get to that point where you want to, you know, you go, okay, we need to go now, and you're trying to yell at them, and they're only a couple of metres away in the pool, but they're in and out, they're under the water, they're over there like, Sierra! Indy! Sierra them and they're only a couple of metres away in the pool but they're in and out they're under the water and over there like, Sienna! Indy! Sienna! They don't hear you for like 20 minutes. They probably do hear you but they're just constantly diving in and

out. We need to go! As they pop above the water. Getting a child out of the pool, you almost just need to unplug the pool and just slowly let it drain out for them to go, okay now time's up. Now's the time to go. But they get in there for so long, they get to the stage where their whole body is wrinkly.

It gets all so prune-like, doesn't it? Wrinkly, it's like almost leprosy. Skin could just fall off at any moment. They're so wrinkly. Do you do, are you a bomb guy? Do you like doing bombs? Oh, I'm not very good at doing bombs. My body's not built for manus. No.

You? No, but my mate has got a sign up in his pool, actually. I thought it was quite funny. And it says, pool rules. And it says, no one's allowed to do anything in the pool that starts with, hey, everyone, watch this. And I thought that was quite clever because that's usually where things go wrong. You're like, hey, I'm going to do this. Hey, everyone, watch this.

I was like, it's quite a good sign he got off the internet. That's a great thing when kids go, like, to, hey, I'm going to do this. Hey, everyone, watch this. I was like, it's quite a good sign he got off the internet. That's a great thing when kids go like to, hey, watch this. I've been doing this thing. And they don't nail it. Oh, yeah. And then you've got to be like, oh, no, that was really good. And then they get more and more frustrated because they haven't nailed it. And they get themselves wound up even further, don't they?

Yeah. I'm a little bit traumatised by swimming. I remember at school, like I think it was like seventh form back in the day or year 13. We had to film. You had to get filmed, you know, freestyle. And then you get analysed on how you were on film. But I had very loose togs. And midway through, like just my togs started going down.

And I was like, oh, bottoms, bottoms, you know. How old were you? I was like, you know, like 15, 16. But we had the high performance New Zealand Swimming Academy? I don't know what we did, but my stroke freestyle was like a stroke, stroke, oh, pull my pants up, stroke, stroke. Yeah, I saw my stroke very, very average at best. You know, I saw the other day I went to some swimming lessons

watching children do it. And I used to do the same thing. When you're doing backstroke and you can pull on the lane separator, secretly pull on the lane separator. Secretly pull on the lane separator. Oh, to give you a bit of momentum. Yeah, and I saw this kid doing it and I was like, that brings back some memories and you're hoping the swimming teacher doesn't see. I've never tried that.

Does it work? It's a dream. It's a dream. Great for winning swimming races as well. Gives you a bit of a towing advantage. Experts in semi-accurate, half-remembered information. Vaguely known information but maybe not correct. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. It's time to look at some big news. Small town.

Town, town, town, town, town. Sounds similar to the fact of the day, day, day, day. We need to rebrand that. We do, but we quite enjoy doing that. I see why they've done that for so many years. Now, this is some big news coming out of Christchurch, but really big news coming out of Antarctica. Yeah, this is a wild story. You can purchase a

vehicle which has lived most of its life, in fact all of its life at Scott Base in Antarctica. You can only imagine how many emperor penguins this thing's accidentally run over. And joining us on the phone right now, he's the General Manager of Antarctica Operations. His name is

Simon Trotter. How's it going, Simon? Thanks for joining us. How are you? Good morning. I'm very well, gentlemen and selves. Well, we're in a bit of a heated debate at the moment, Simon. Yes. Are you currently in Antarctica or not?

I'd be telling a lie if I said I was. This thing called COVID sort of got in the way of that. So this year, my travels to the icy continent have been cut short. So I've had to settle for a Canterbury summer. I thought that was the case, John. I was like, no, we're calling Antarctica. I was like, I don't think I watched you on the news the other day, and you were in Christchurch.

Yeah, I've been telling everyone you're in Antarctica. So if you could just do some, make some sound effects with your mouth, and we can sell the dream, Simon. Sell a dream. Hey, well, that's that Toyota Trooper that you're ringing about, I guess. It is. It is. So tell us about what you do and then we'll get to the car that's up for sale.

So, yeah, my role with Antarctica New Zealand is I look after the operations platform. So that's logistics, people going to from Christchurch to Antarctica. So how many times have you been there? Oh, I've been with the programme about 14 or 15 years, so I've probably had 20, 25 trips north and south. How long does it take to fly to Antarctica, Simon? So depending on how you're travelling, like we've got the New Zealand Air Force support the programme with their C-130 aircraft,

so that's about a seven to nine-hour flight depending on what wind conditions are doing. If you're flying with the US on their jet, the C-17, that could be a five-and-a-half-hour flight. So it all depends on weather conditions. And so when you say you're in the Air Force plane, you know, some in-flight entertainment. Cassava chips or a cookie, that sort of thing? Or is it just everyone's just sitting on the floor holding on for dear life?

No, no, it's all pretty comfortable. So with the US jet, there are no windows in the aircraft. So you get a packed lunch, log into your computer, watch a movie, listen to some sounds, and just chill out for the trips out. You got some Wi-Fi on the plane there? Oh, no, no, just go the old Bluetooth. You can't, there's no Wi-Fi. Yeah, guys, it's stuff you've got on there.

Downloaded onto a little memory stick or something. And what is Antarctica like? Like, it just fascinates me, because it's a place I'll probably never go to. So what's it like? What's there? Well, I guess for me, you know, the first thing that attracted me to the ice was the environment. Like, I worked in the field as a field guide. It still is, for me, one of the most amazing places in the world that I've ever travelled to.

And I guess the uniqueness of having worked with some pretty amazing scientists and the privilege of being based at Scott Base and taking care of that place for future generations has been a really neat thing for me but the natural environment down there is like no other experience you can ever have and it's a

continent of extremes because you get that winter cold those conditions that you really experience here, but you might in the northern hemisphere right through to, you know, some of the wildlife that we get in and around McMurdo Sound, like the killer whales, the seals, the, you know, the emperor and the daily penguins. There's some pretty amazing experiences.

Wow. I'm glad to have that privilege. Are there polar bears there? I haven't seen any, but there's reported sightings of a few around Scott Base, I believe. Wow.

And so, because obviously that part of the world, you've got six months of daylight, then six months of darkness. Is that how it works? Yeah.

So, from late October, we sort of have the final sunrise, and then it's sort of, it's white and bright for 24-7 and then the conditions sort of

start to get darker from, you know, sort of late February onwards into that complete darkness for pretty much the months of June July, it's 24 darkness. How do you go to sleep when it's broad daylight at, you know, 10, 11 o'clock at night?

Yeah, well, that's a good question. So the base is pretty well set up for the accommodation area is separate to the other operational parts of our base and you have shutters on the windows and you're able to shut the light right down for that part of the summer season. And then you have the opposite effect in the winter. You know, you have to can utilise lighting and stuff in bedrooms just to get the old brain sort of focused on sort of sparking up

in those dark months of winter. Must be so confusing for your brain to adjust, but you get there. But we need to talk to you about the Land Cruiser. It's for sale right now. This is a vehicle that's been in Antarctica for many years, right? Yeah, that's right. So we have a number of vehicles that

we return to New Zealand at the end of their work life down there. And as you've probably seen, one careful owner, it doesn't have too many kilometres on it. And it's probably one of those vehicles that's transported a few of our Prime Ministers and well known

folks that we've hosted on the ice through the years Oh wow, so some highly regarded derriers have sat on the seats of this Toyota Certainly, certainly, yeah and I guess you've probably still got a radio but she should be 17 years old,

so it might be able to tune into the hits. That's good. Radio New Zealand. Thank you so much for your time. I hope the auction goes well, the sale goes well, and look after yourself. Hey, thanks, guys. From stealing Mike Hosking's car

to stealing the hearts of New Zealand. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. Actual hearts being not bestowed. Also very exciting tonight on TVNZ2, a new reality show, The Walkers, around Stan Walker and his family. It looks awesome, actually. It does look really good.

I thought you were going to throw to some audio of the show. I was trying to find something. I couldn't find it. Okay, because you still sounded like you were going to throw to audio of it. Yeah. Did I? But you didn't have any... No.

Oh, that's fine. Hey, that's fine. Anyway, let's head to the man himself. Stan Walker is with us on New Zealand's Breakfast. Morena. Morena. How are you? Morena to you, buddy.

Morena, you sound like you've just woken up. Well, you were meant to come into the studio, but of course now you're doing it from the comfort of your own bed. I know. It was so good. I was on my way down, and then we got the letter. I was like, oh, no, no, no. I'm not coming there.

Now, hey, mate, you got engaged. Congratulations. Yes. Yeah. Now, I don't want to put any pressure, but if you're in the market for some semi-professional wedding MCs, I know Stacey Morrison and Nekomoa will be a vote. That'd be quite good. Harry Barry, Jeremy Wells.

Another good combo. There's a lot of great combos out there. We've got some contacts if you need us to reach out to them. Yeah. No, that's awesome. How'd you propose, mate? It was the most ruggedest proposal, if that's a word. It was off the cuff.

Like, I mean, we always knew that we were going to get married, but it was just, like, when and, like, how I was going to do it. And when I did it, like, I had this grand plan of I was going to propose like this and I was going to wait and get the ring made over here, blah, blah, blah. I couldn't wait. I wanted to marry her now. Like, I wanted, like, so I proposed to her in the garage. The garage.

Did you have a ring? No, had no ring. And we got the ring the next day. Oh, wow, she just wanted to do it. What I do is I feel sorry for the poor covers band or the singer at your wedding because, jeez, they're going to have to live up to some great expectations with you there.

Oh, see, I've got the best muses in the whole world, so. Oh, that's true. They don't know it yet, but they've been listening for free. Now, tonight, TVNZ2, very exciting, the new reality TV show. Are you nervous about the screening or are you excited? I think both. It's hilarious. It's really hilarious.

But, like, I always get nervous because I'm used to everybody saying anything about me. But now it's my whole family. Yeah. I don't know how I would go with that. It's quite protective. Yeah, no, fair enough. And you guys are, you know, such a lovely family. Warts and all, you'll show everything.

I'm sure nothing's held back on camera. Did this come out of the blue, this reality show idea, or something you've always wanted to do with the whānau? Oh, this is honestly, this, like, there's been so many different people that have tried to

do shows on our family and it hasn't worked out and even this time around I was like, oh, I don't know if I want to do it but my family was so keen and I was like,

you don't know what it's like but they were keen. I was like, okay, well, if they want to do it, well, then I'll do it with them. And so do you get used to the cameras being around you all the time, or does it become a bit like,

do you have to have awkward conversations off camera? No, see, I'm used to it. I'm used to having cameras there, and I actually forget that they're actually there. But my family, like my mum, she plays it off of the camera. She's like, ooh, Stan, come over here. And I was like my mum, she plays it up for the camera. She's like, oh, Stan, come over here. And I was like, mum, relax. Stan, it is lovely to see you today.

Yeah. Well, we met your mum before, April, and she is awesome. She's very high case. She's embarrassing. I love my mum, but she's shameless. That's the only joy you get as a parent is embarrassing your children.

It's why you become, even if your parent is embarrassing your children. That's right. Even if your child is Stan Walker, it's like, I'm going to take him down a peg or two. It's so good. Now, Stan, before you go, we can't wait to obviously watch the show tonight, but we wanted to call in a quick favour from you. Now, yesterday was Valentine's Day, and my

wife Amanda, you know, I thought we had an agreement that we weren't to buy presents for each other. We weren't going to celebrate it, but she got me a present and it was one of those awkward situations where I was like, oh,

I didn't get her anything. Much like you were proposing without a ring. Yeah. Could I give her a quick call and maybe this could be the Valentine's present. I'll just say some stuff

to maybe lead you into singing little snippets of some of your songs to her over the phone. Could we do that? It's going to sound not like how it normally sounds. I was just thinking, he sounds very morning-y.

Give us a good idea. This may be the house. We'll give it a back to you. We'll call Amanda right now. Oh, I can do something later. No one judge Stan for the singing. No, that's right. This is not easy.

Good morning, Amanda speaking. Oh, hey, that's right. This is not easy. Good morning, Amanda speaking. Oh, hey, it's me. Hi. Hey, I was just thinking just quickly about yesterday and obviously I feel really bad that I didn't get you a present and you got me a present.

So I wanted to ring you up right now and just, Amanda, to thank you. You know, just say thank you for everything. What? Thank you. I will choose to love you, even though I want to get married.

That was half-hearted, all right? I came in strong. Your husband loves you. I love you. We're on. I don't know where to go from this. It sounds like me and Stan Walker and my wife Are going to spend some time together

Okay this is a shambles Hang up on her Hang up on me Hang up on Stan Walker as well Hang up on everyone I told you it was going to sound He did give you warning He did

Now we've got angry Ben Angry Ben who's like My bit didn't work I told you it was going to sound... He did give you warning. He did. Now we've got angry Ben. Angry Ben who's like, my bit didn't work. Hang up on him. Hang up on him. It's not Stan's fault. No, it's not Stan's fault.

Amanda didn't know. She just answered the phone. And you're getting angry. Love you, mate. You're a good man tonight. You're awesome, Stan. The Walkers TV and Zed 2. It's always good catching up with you, buddy. Keep safe out there.

Hello. Ben and Jono call this show Jono and Ben. Breakfast on the hips. The hips. In the middle of 72 hours of level three for Auckland, level two for the rest of the country. Got a heck of a fright, as we mentioned earlier, when that civil defence alarm went off last night.

Bark, bark, bark. You text me, you're like, did you get a fright? And I was like, yes, I got a fright. Juliet was like, I got a fright too. We're all on our WhatsApp going, oh, everyone just got a fright. You know one of the good things, though, about having the Afternoons show sponsored by Chemist Warehouse

is we have a wonderful Chemist Warehouse display in the studio. It's like we're running a Super Red or something in here. But we're not allowed to touch it, though. But it's got an abundance of hand sanitiser which is perfect for this time of year. Oh yeah.

Yeah. But it's not for us. It's for the afternoon show. It's not us. We can't sanitise our hands with the chemist. No, I don't think we're allowed. I don't think we've got

sanitising privileges. Yeah. Can I spray Vera Wang's Princess cologne all over me? No, I don't think that's allowed either. Can't touch it. What about the tissues?

Can I blow my nose? They're not for us. Okay. Be happy with our wonderful friends from Skinny. Yeah, love our friends from Skinny. And there goes the corporate obligations. Now, yesterday, have you been to Wash World? You know those car washing places where it's like

you can just bring your car along and you put money in and you wash your car yeah you know you do it yourself you know julia oh yeah yeah i think i see them there's one by the the old green lane roundabout all over the country i always thought it'd be such a wonderful business idea well no geez they must make some coin all day all you have to do is just fill up a bit of palm olive once a week oh yes thanks for the outlay oh you have to. Yeah, right. But I don't know, have you been to one before? A while ago, yes I have. We went along in there and cleaned the car.

So much pressure. It's like, it's a race against the clock. Why? Because you put a coin in and you've got like 159, 158, it counts down. I find the same thing when you use the petrol station vacuum cleaner. You're like, here we go, here we go. You're like, kids, get the things out.

We're going to go. And it's like you end up in a soapy frenzy, just frantically soaping your car or vacuuming like an absolute maniac. Yes. Just a while and everyone is in the same position. Everyone's just like going in fast forward, washing and cleaning their cars as quickly as possible. But I thought, you know, worst case,

you just go get another coin. You put another coin. But you feel like as soon as this clock ticks down, everything's going to explode. But I went there and it was quite busy. It just reminded me. And I was doing the same thing as you, frantically trying to get in before the time.

And I didn't finish. And so I put a coin in and there was another car that was waiting to get into my thing. And he went so he was getting in and he was like I don't need this pressure now mate I know I've gone over the time but I need to finish off the thing

but you could tell he was like this might be three minutes or whatever you know I tell you what you did nothing quite like a car just washed in a panic race against time and then you get home and you're like oh god I've missed three quarters of this thing. I didn't even do a good job at all. I washed someone else's car.

I was in such a frenzy. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. It's just about 7.45, so that means... Five words for 5K on the hit. You're only five words away from a massive payday. We do this every morning at 7.45,

our Game of Word Association. Five words for $5,000. We tell you five words, you tell us the first words that pop into your head if they match with ours. You're 5K richer. So far, we've had two winners of five grand over the last few weeks. There are a lot of words in the English language.

In fact, 171,146 to be precise. Is it? I thought there would have been more than that. You think so? 171,000 words. These words are made up every day, wouldn't you think? And the first word in the dictionary

is aardvark. Oh, yeah. And the last one is zaziva, which is a South American yellowish weevil. And that bit of content brought to you by the internet. Thank you, internet. www.google.com Where would radio be without the internet?

It'd be a lot more boring than... Your thing is boring now, imagine it without the internet. We'll go to Sally. You're on the air, Morena. Morena. Good to have you on. Sal, how's Fitianga this morning? Very wet. Are you in level two?

We are. What does that mean for you, Sally? I suppose it means being a bit more vigilant as far as the tracing app and sanitising and distance and that sort of stuff. I know, wild parties over 100 people for you, Sal.

When have you ever been to a party with 100 people? I know, yeah. You can't party with 100 people. I don't know 100 people. Okay, Sally, your choice now. Ben or myself to go into the soundproof booth and you to match five words with?

I think I'm going to put Ben in the soundproof booth, thanks. Okay, I'm going to the soundproof booth now. I'll do my best for you, Sal. Thanks. Good luck. Boy, oh boy, the things that have gone on in that soundproof booth with those walls could talk. Actually, Juliet, you spend a lot of time after the

show in the soundproof booth working. I actually do. It's got a little mini desk and it's my place to go when I don't want to be distracted. It's very antisocial. You're like, I would rather be locked in a box than talk to John Orbea after the show. Okay, Sally, you know the game. Five words. First word that comes into your head.

If you match with Ben, you've got five grand. Today's first word. Left. Right. Seems like the obvious choice. Thumbs. Fingers. Fanta.

Ooh. Fingers. Fanta. Coke. Gym, as in G-Y-M. Fitness. Oh, yeah, good. You're firing these off quickly there, Sel. And the fifth and final word. Australia. Now that's a tricky one.

Australia. I'm going to just go with Oz. Oz, okay. Now, Ju, looking at those five words, they're not bad, are they? No, I liked how efficient you were, Sally. Yeah. You came out firing. Quick game's a good game for Sally.

You pretty happy with those words? Ah, yeah. If you linger, you end up sort of doubting yourself. Dead right. Your first instinct's always the best one. What word are you a little bit sceptical on? Oh, the Australian one. Yeah.

Yeah. Many options for that. Let's get Ben back out of the SPB. Soundproof booth. He's come out there with gusto. You're springing. You're bouncing. You're looking alive.

I'm ready to go. I'm ready to win. Sally, $5,000. That's what I'm hoping. Sally, play quick and confident. Oh, should I try and do the same? Yeah. Play quick and confident. Okay, should I try and do the same? Yeah. Play quick and confident.

Okay. Two things you're not. It's not quick and or confident. But here we go. The first word to match with Sally. Left. Right. One for one.

Quick and confident. Here we go. Here we go. Thumbs. Thumbs. Thumbs? As in thumbs up sort of thing. Fingers. Two from two, Sally.

Any words of motivation you'd like to offer my quick and confident friend? No, you just keep going as you are, Ben. We're liking it. Quick and confident. Here we go. Fanta. Orange. Quick and confident. Here we go. Fanta. Orange. I nearly said orange.

Did you nearly say orange, Sally? Yeah, it was in my mind. What did you say? She said Coke. Coke. Oh, mate. Anyway. There you go.

Sorry, Sally. We'll go through the remaining two words. Gym. G-Y-M Workout It was fitness And the fifth and final word, Australia Australia, ooh, there's lots

Kangaroo Oh my god What a disappointment What did Sally say for that one? She said Oz There's so many things for Australia. I want to be back in lockdown forever, thanks to that effort.

I'm going to lockdown myself back in the Southbrook booth, right? Hey, Sel, thanks so much for listening to the show. You go and have a wonderful day. Keep safe and fitty younger, okay? Thank you very much. How about the chance tomorrow morning, 7.45, to play Five Words for $5,000? Sorry, I was going to go to the soundproof booth.

I kept thinking you came back. I was wrapping up the break and I thought, oh, he said he was off to the soundproof booth. No one cares. No one knows I've gone back to the soundproof booth. And then all of a sudden, we popped up and we were talking over each other. Yeah. Really shat out. They're proud of New Zealand.

Go New Zealand. If only New Zealand was proud of them. Jono and Ben. New Zealand's breakfast. On the hits. I mentioned last week, very briefly, that I went into a wild bean cafe. You spend a lot of time mentioning about wild bean, almost like you're taking some backhanded money to mention it.

You're like, I love wild bean. Do you guys love wild bean? I do love wild bean. And a shame to say it. Nothing but positive things to say as well. It's an underrated cafe. Stop doubling down on it. Have you heard their lasagna? I bought a lasagna.

Delicious lasagna. It just leaves your fingers quite greasy and then you drive your steering wheel and it slips away. Why would you need their fingers? Eh? Well, there's no cutlery. Well, it's a handheld lasagna. Okay. Just the way the Italians wanted it.

So I think it's even a deep fried lasagna. Just the way the Italians wanted it. So I think it's even a deep fried lasagna. Just the way they imagined it. You're right, Ben. The traditional Italian dish of deep fried petrol station lasagna. Anyway, so we went into the lobby and they were laughing behind the counter. And I was like,

what's going on, guys? What a joyous laughter. And they were laughing because someone had just Uber Eats ordered a single tomato squeezy sauce. You know those tiny little ones that you sort of pierce back and it comes firing out at an unreasonable rate of knots? Yeah. So someone had just ordered one of these. These are 30 cents, I imagine. Factor in the delivery fee. It's an expensive sauce, like for eight milligrams of millilitres of sauce.

That seems quite pricey. And after the show, we're like, oh, maybe they prefer to pie from another proprietor, but they also like the sauce from Wild Bean. So they ordered both at the same time, hoping that both the delivery drivers would turn up at the same time so they could have their meal at once. Yeah, you're right. If the sauce took a while to arrive, the pie would get cold. There's a lot of issues with that.

But we were talking about it before the show and we're like, we couldn't work out if it was lazy or if it was legendary. You know, like, was this a lazy thing to do or was this a legend thing to do? Like, if you're going to order a little sauce, may as well just get a cup of unleaded 91 from the petrol station as well. Sort of make it worth your while. You know? But I'm going to say this is complete laziness. What are you going to go? Legend?

Oh, it is kind of one of those. When we're talking about it now, we've talked about it twice on the radio. Yeah, I mean, the real winner out of this is our radio show. It's filled so much airtime for us. I'm going to say it's a legendary thing. It's like, oh, what about the guy?

I mean, those people at Wild Bean, they're talking about it. We're talking about it. The other people wouldn't, you know, the flat would be like, oh, you ordered a thing. it's a legendary thing. It's like, oh, what about the guy? I mean, those people at Wild Bean, they're talking about it. We're talking about it. The other people, you know, the flat will be like, oh, you ordered a thing. It's a legendary story. So we want to do this. We want to play this game, Lazy or Legend. You phone up with something that could be on the fence of whether you're being completely lazy or an absolute legend.

And we'll decide. We'll talk it out with you. I got one the other night. I was in the bedroom watching something because I've got a TV in the bedroom. So I was watching something on Netflix. I couldn't find the remote to turn off the TV. I was in the bedroom watching something because I've got a TV in the bedroom, so I was watching something on Netflix. I couldn't find the remote to turn off the TV. I don't know where it had gone. But I noticed that Amanda's phone

was sitting on the bed and she was up doing some stuff. So I called her. She came back down to the bedroom to get her phone. I was like, oh, that was me. By the way, you're here now. Could you just turn the TV off? She didn't think it was legendary. I was going to oh, that was me. By the way, you're here now. Could you just turn the TV off? She didn't think it was legendary. I was going to say it was legendary. But it was extremely lazy on my behalf,

but I thought, oh, that was a good way around it. Okay, I'll wait under the hits. Lazy or legend, you call us up. Maybe you live right on top of a pizza parlour and you also order delivery from them. Stuff like this. We'll decide if you're lazy or a legend. Sarah, you're on from Invercargill.

Morena. Morena. Lazy or legend. You tell us what you've done and we'll decipher whether you're lazy or a legend. Well, I'm out in the countryside and so I tend to just, well, take my dogs for a drive where they kind of run and I kind of drive alongside. Oh, okay. So you're not walking the dogs, you're driving the dogs.

So they're on the footpath and you're just slowly, you know, creepily stalking alongside your dogs. Yeah, exactly, or large grass fields, you know. Oh, so you'll drive through a park with your dogs. More like farmland. But through a paddock, oh yeah. I'm going to go lech it

so have you never thought you could walk along or I mean I did I did for a while but then I thought

about driving she's thought about walking but this is definitely a better option there's air conditioning there's radio yeah that's pretty

legendary I'd say that's legend well done you're a legend we're going to give you a hell pizza voucher Sarah thanks

that's really you could do that with your dog. Your dog, when you took him for a walk, he dragged you into a muddy estuary, didn't he? That's right, he did. Yeah, he fell off the boardwalk. The boardwalk, and I fell off with him. That's what happens. But if I'd been driving.

That wouldn't have happened. No. You might have run over him. Yeah, true. A lot could go wrong in that situation. Maybe it's not so legendary. Have we got another call, or why has it gone purple? I mean, Behams is chatting to them behind the scenes.

Oh, Producer Humphries talking to someone behind the scenes. Now, this is what happens on a radio show. Behind the scenes, Producer Humphries talking to the callers, just going, see if they're worthy of going on air. Oh, really? So now we get the big decision now. We go over to Producer Humphries. Has he let them through?

We'll see if Jet gets let through. Olivia is on the phone on 0800 The Hits right now. Welcome Olivia to New Zealand's Breakfast Lazy or Legend. Hi. What do you do? Hi, so my story is that my dad doesn't have a

ride on Bournemouth, right? So what he started to do is he hooked up just his old Bournemouth to this toy go-kart, and he just rides around on that and mows the lawn. Legend. It doesn't sound entirely safe, but it sounds like a legendary act. So he just drives the little go-kart and basically tows the lawnmower along.

Yeah, exactly. That's a legendary category. But mind you, you'd have quite uneven lawns, wouldn't you? Yeah, it doesn't seem Yeah, exactly. Wow. That's legendary category. But mind you, you'd have quite uneven lawns wouldn't you? Yeah, it doesn't seem like, yeah. Thank you very much Olivia. We'll get you some hell pizza, eh? Cheers, thank you. Thank you very much. Someone's also saying on 4487 along

your remote control thing where you called Amanda to come into the room and change the remote control for you. That they once called their partner on the other side of the bed just to wind them up. Just to say, hey, how you going? How you going over there?

Because they couldn't be bothered rolling over and facing them. Made to talk words and stuff into a microphone. It's New Zealand's breakfast. Jono and Ben on the hits. Now we've got the latest news, the latest Prime Minister has spoken this morning and we've got that with you. The news at the top on the hits. Now we've got the latest news. The Prime Minister has spoken this morning and we've got that with you.

The news at the top of the... I'm trying to sound like a proper... He's trying to sound professional. Did I? Did I? He's trying to slip into more at 8 o'clock. It just does not suit you. No, it does not suit you. Spy.

No WhatsApp. Spy.co.nz The Prime Minister has spoken and there'll be some news on the news show coming up. Alright. Much like North West,

she's an artist, an artist of spinning lies and half-truths about celebrities. Juliet, what's going on in Spy? So in Taylor Swift's quest to re-record six of her old albums after she kind of lost ownership of them to Scooter

Braun, who's a manager of Justin Bieber and Ariana Grande. Whole big debacle there. Anyway, she's re-recording a bunch of stuff. Her first breakthrough album, Fearless, is on the way in April, but she released Love Story, a new version and it's named Love Story, Taylor's version, in April, but she released a love story, a new version, and it's named Love Story,

Taylor's version in brackets to sort of differentiate from her old love story. Sounds kind of the same, kind of different. Thoughts? That lady sounds like Taylor Swift. She's just ripping off Taylor Swift.

I can't notice any difference, to be honest. No, it's only when you hear them side by side that there's very subtle differences. But yeah, it sounds awesome. Just as good as the first time around. Yeah. I was trying to explain it to my daughters,

because I was like, oh, she's recorded a song. And it's a very hard thing to explain about the music rights to a 9 and 11-year-old. Yeah, exactly. Why were you explaining music rights to a 9 and 11-year-old? All right, you can sit down. Time for you to learn the hard truths, the harsh realities of the entertainment industry.

Make sure if you record a song, make sure you own those rights. What have I always told you? Yeah, yeah. No, because I was like, oh, this is the... I was like, I stupidly said, this is a new version of a song she's recorded. Oh, then you got into a hole. Why have they recorded it?

And I was like, oh, it was like me before saying news and the Prime Minister and updated dates. Never open Pand you got into a hole. Why have they recorded? And I was like, oh, it was like me before saying news and the Prime Minister and updated dates. Never open Pandora's box with kids. The questions are just relentless. Juliet, you're a big T-Swift fan. Yeah, I do like her. After hearing this, I'm really excited to hear all of the

re-recordings of all her other albums because I'm excited to hear how she makes them a bit different. You know? It's quite cool. This has never really happened to another celebrity. She'll sound a bit more mature, you would imagine, particularly from the first album. Exactly. I don't know.

I don't know why I'm pretending like I know everything about Taylor Swift. I know nothing. That sounded good. And a few years ago, you may remember, there was a letter. If you're a big royalist, what's going on there? Well, what happened there is the Chemist Warehouse sign fell off, then comically knocked over Anika Moore's guitar, which then collapsed onto the ground on top of a pair of headphones.

I don't know. Could people hear that? I'm not sure. But anyway, moving on. The good thing was that we weren't distracted by it. No, not at all. But a couple of years ago, a letter that Meghan Markle had written her father,

Thomas Markle, got leaked and published by UK tabloid, the Mail Online and Daily Mail. Anyway, two years of court battles. Meghan Markle has won that battle. And she released a statement basically saying, for these outlets, it's a game. For me and so many others, it's real life, real relationships and real sadness.

She's obviously very grateful for all the people that helped her win that battle. And sort of, I guess, rightly so. If your personal messages are getting published to the world, it's not very fair. Absolutely. And it's quite easy to forget that they're people. They're real lives.

And, you know, with this Britney doco, which is coming into New Zealand today, it's a good reminder that they are real people. And, hey, no one's had more fun mocking people than me. Don't get me wrong. But sometimes you've got to realise that they are real people. And hey, no one's had more fun mocking people than me. Don't get me wrong. But sometimes you've got to realise that they are real people. That's a very good point. Then you continue making jokes about them.

And that's five and more. You can head to the hits.co.nz. Real Kiwi blokes with soy lattes. Shona and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Went down and saw a little bit of the Prada Cup over the weekend. Just soaked up the atmosphere down on the island. Mmm. Now afterwards, the boats come back in by the viaduct there. And everyone clapped in the Great Britain boat, which was nice because they obviously lost. And then they get put up, the boat gets put up on a big crane and taken onto land.

But then they have to hose it down. Oh, like when you go out and watch people who go out fishing. The bloody America's Cup. They've got to do the part. It's like coming back, not catching any fish. These guys win the race and someone's got to hose the thing down. It's almost if you're part of Team Ineos UK, you'd want to get a charter boat, wouldn't you?

So you don't have to do all that admin at the end. Oh, but if I hose the thing down, you know, it's like, ah. So not great news for Great Britain there, but there's some big news coming out of Great Britain today. Royal news. Harry and Meghan are expecting baby number two.

Oh, isn't that exciting? And more exciting to think that baby will never meet its grandmother. Oh, isn't that exciting? And more exciting to think that baby will never meet its grandmother. She's really like... That is very sad. It's not like she doesn't want anything. There's not part of them.

Really, Ben? You leave the royal family, you're cut off for life. No, that is wonderful. Congratulations. That's awesome. Now, here's a question. Would the baby have a US passport

or a British one? I would say US. Born in the US? Yeah. So then the baby's sibling, lovely little baby... Archie. Archie. How could I forget baby Archie?

I just did. You know none of the names. Archie would be a British passport. Yeah. Yes, correct. So very exciting. They released a statement saying Archie's going to be a big brother and they released it with a lovely black and white photo of,

oh, that music got really dark. I think it did. As soon as you mentioned Megan. Interesting. Interesting. Not planned. What I was going to say was it released a photo of her lying in a grassy field with Harry, and you can see her pregnant belly.

It's a beautiful photo. That's awesome. So very exciting. That's awesome. Well done to them both. Congratulations to the... What's his surname? Sussexes.

Are they? What is his surname? Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor is his full name. Oh, there you go. Well, happy... It's great news. Broadcasting live. And mostly awake.

Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. On the hits. Of course, announced last night by the Prime Minister, New Zealand, well, Auckland goes into a three-day lockdown. Level three, the rest of the country at level two. I had to be reminded again. I was like, what does level three mean? It'd been a while.

You sort of had to look it up and you're like, oh, that's right, I get to do that, but I can't do that. Yeah, I know, but it actually hasn't been that long. No, I know, but suddenly you've forgotten.

Is Alzheimer's kicking in? Which one's level three? What can we do So that means I can still go around kissing people?

Level three? No, apparently not. Oh, no, that's off. Frowned upon. Frowned upon. Frowned upon. We spoke to a psychic, remember?

Not but three or four weeks ago to get some filler radio content. What's going to happen in 2021? Oh, it was quite interesting. You're right. We talked to them before the end of last year going, okay, 2021, what's going to happen? And they said some really interesting things.

And now we've reflected back and gone, maybe she was right. I do have a feeling there's going to be another little lockdown. It won't be a big one. It may last maybe two weeks at the most because of the new variant. But I think they'll close it down quite quickly. There we go. She predicted it. A new variant. I don't even think we knew that.

This is a new variant. We didn't know about a new variant when we talked to the psychic. Or the pessimist in me would say it's a safe bet. It's a relatively safe prediction. As I say, someone will win lotto at some stage in 2021. It may rain through July and

August. You didn't hear it from me. No, my parents have been staying from Christchurch, Annie and John Pryor. Love them. Because they made me in a passionate embrace. Oh, God. Went on for hours.

They did. They told me. Anyway, mum on Friday, she's like, I'm getting a cold. I'm getting a cold. Take me to a COVID testing station. So I got home from radio on Friday and I had to take her to one in a car park. You see the ones in the tents, the ones on the news

that everyone is lining up for? Little pop-up tent. Yeah. And took her along there and it was the first time Annie had had a rod up, who knows.

She was a little nervous. And I didn't quite pick up on her nervous vibes and I was like waiting in line in the car and I was like, tell you what, it's amazing you don't know

how far up your nasal cavity goes. And on reflection, probably wasn't the greatest thing to say as she's about to, but anyway. So she got the test done and she had to cancel her flight yesterday because she hadn't had her results back. Oh, that's good. Yeah, I think she could have got on a plane if she wanted, but she just, you know, team of five million.

Yeah, she's quite passionate about it and good on her, you know, for being like that. But I thought, because I felt sorry for the, you know, the hard-working frontline workers. These people are out there, 30-degree heat on Friday in full PPE gear. We need to get summertime PPE gear. But, you know, the singlets and shorts.

Mesh singlets and stuff. PPE mesh singlets. Yeah, and like, you know, the visors, maybe make them look like cool sunglasses for summertime. Look like Daft Punk or something.

Yeah. Yeah, just spare a thought. They must be steaming. So your mum's all good now, you were saying that? She got the test back. She's all fine. But then she would like

refuse to come out of her room. She's like, I'm not leaving this bed. She really took it seriously. Team of five million. She was locked in her bedroom for three days. I was like, you don't have COVID bed. She really took it seriously. Team of five million. She was locked in her bedroom for three days. I was like, you don't have COVID, Annie.

You can come out. No! I had to slide food under the door and things. Don't come near me. But that was very good. I take the mickey. But it's very responsible. That's not going to spread, though.

Tell you what, she wasn't going to be spreading anything. No, it's good. I liked in some of the, because the locations of interest were put out last night, you know, places that the people have gone. Bunnings three times. I know. This guy loves Bunnings. Someone loves Bunnings.

Maybe he was trying to beat them by, find the same stocked item and beat it by 15%. So he's just driving around all the Bunnings. Bunnings, Mount Roskill, and their line trimmer. A little bit cheaper than you do. What's more, Jonoo and Ben you can catch up with the boys anytime

just search Jono and Ben on Instagram the A to Z of New Zealand something we do every day on the hits is we call a different town or city in New Zealand we do one a day

we do it alphabetically and we're slowly making our way around New Zealand learning about each place as we go. Yeah, we're into the L's, and I tell you what, there have been some famous Lincolns throughout history. The 16th US President, Abraham Lincoln,

once famously said, Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends? LinkedIn once famously said, Paula Garrett would like to connect with you on LinkedIn, and then sent another 199 emails asking the same question. LinkedIn is relentless, isn't it? Relentless. I got into a hole of LinkedIn. Apparently it's the most

responded to spam email in the history of the internet. And it's because they just don't stop. They are so persistent but it gets the most reaction. Yeah, just stop. I don't want to connect with Gary from LinkedIn. I don't care if he's an accountant.

Pricewaterhouse. I don't know. You don't want to connect with him now. I'm a low-level radio announcer. I have nothing to do with anyone from PricewaterhouseCoopers. I'm not business with them. And Lincoln in Canterbury once famously said, we have a high-performance cricket centre featuring six lanes of indoor nets,

a gym and accommodation for cricketers, and we're heading through to the local bakery in Lincoln. Rustic Bakery Cafe, Olivia speaking. Morning, Olivia. How are you going? You sound in the midst of madness in the morning bakery programme, so we won't take you too long.

Oh, you're all good. I'm assuming you'll give us your time. I haven't even asked you. It's Jono and Ben from The Hits here. How you doing? It's not too late to hang up. No, no, you're fine. It's all good. We like to learn something about each place we're calling every town and city in New Zealand, and you're in Lincoln, right? We sure are. And you're at the bakery.

I am. Baking away. Literally, how many fingers and pies do you have right now? Oh, it's actually more bread doughs at the moment. I am. Baking away. Literally, how many fingers and pies do you have right now? Oh, it's actually more bread doughs at the moment. I've got my fingers in. Oh, here's a little game. Can you say an item that you sell and we'll try and guess what the price is? Oh, we'll do one of our gourmet pies.

Oh, gourmet pie. Gourmet pie. I reckon you're going over the $5 mark with a gourmet one. Yeah, you'd have to, right? Yeah, yeah. I'll say $6. I'll lock in $6, Jono. Keep going. Just a little bit more. I'm going to say $8.50. $8.50? No.

No, that's too much. You're getting offended by it. Okay, I'm going to say... We can't rip people off. $7? Just down from that. That's $6.95. Just down a little bit? $6.80. $6.95. Just down a little bit? $6.80. Yeah.

$6.80. That's not bad for a gourmet pie. That's bloody good for a gourmet pie. But we make them from scratch here. Oh, that's awesome. What about the crapper pies? The crapper pies? There's no crapper pies in this place.

No, no, no. We've got none of that here. And now what's your favourite item that you sell and make? Well, to be honest, because we won second place in the country for hot cross buns last year, I'd have to say hot cross buns. Oh, I can see the hot cross bun season's already started. It is. It's started already.

Too early. And Easter eggs in the supermarket. They're ready to go. Isn't it crazy? Are you already hot cross bunning? Yeah. Are you? I've already done a dose.

I've got some in the shop already. I actually had some for breakfast today. I had hot cross buns to get at home. Why don't we just run them all year round? Why not? It's at that point. Where it is. Now, what can you tell us about Lincoln?

Because obviously a very famous Lincoln University. You know about that. But what else is in Lincoln? Farming community, right? Yeah, massive farming community. But yeah, all the locals are great here. So lovely. But, yeah, you've got a lot of food places as well.

We went to the, a few years ago, working for another radio station, we went to the garden party, and that happens at Lincoln University. Oh, you're the garden party. And, yeah. Oh, my God. That was a day I'll never forget. That's very entertaining for us, those days. They keep trying to bring it earlier and earlier at the university

so people don't get too, you know. Don't preload. And I think people just get up earlier and earlier. Oh, yeah, because when we start at 4 o'clock in the morning, they're already out drinking. Oh, jeez. It's nuts. Yeah, crazy.

Sometimes you're like, oh, God. The university did try their best to curb the binge drinking, but the students just, something changed inside of me that day. I know. I'll never be the same again after that time at Lincoln. It was wild. It was a wild time.

We were giving away burgers there with Nutella. Nutella and a burger at that time. Nutella and a burger. The bacon and Nutella actually is quite a nice combo. It actually wasn't as bad as you thought. Yeah, I could see that appeal.

The students weren't too hungry for some reason. Yeah, yeah. I wonder why. Anyway, I'm not too sure, but it't too hungry for some reason. Yeah, yeah. I wonder why. I'm not too sure, but it looked like they were chewing something. Yeah. But there was no food in their mouth. Yeah, it was. So, Lincoln, we'll come down and visit your cafe. Your bakery

sounds like a great place to go. Yeah, it'd be awesome. Well, we've held you up long enough. You're all good. Mate, you need to get back to making that fresh bread, and that's one of my favourite things in life, is a lovely life of fresh bread. I know, I know. You can't beat that fresh bread now. Oh, and you keep safe there in Lincoln.

Thank you so much. All right, take care. See you later. See you, mate. Bye. Add these two men together, and somehow you get three quarters worth of a normal dad. The hits with Jono and Ben for breakfast.

Scrolling through your feed. Yes, indeed. Ben Boyce proudly presents your first meal of the day, which just happens to be news stories from overnight. No nutritional value whatsoever. No. Now, of course, the big news in New Zealand right now is Level 3 for Auckland, Level 2 for the rest of the country

for 72 hours for three days. But we thought, you know, we've been banging on about that all morning. Let's look at some non-COVID related news this morning. So we gave each other the task to find a non-COVID related story. Ben Boyce, you can go first. Well, I found this kind of scary for this poor lady.

So a woman, she's originally from the US. She lives in Australia. She used an adhesive spray on her hair when she ran out of hairspray. So she used basically a spray-on version of Gorilla Glue on her hair to keep it down, and she hasn't been able to move her hair or get it out since January. Fifteen washes later, her hair won't move, and now she's the poor lady's hand.

They're going to have to go and get some basically surgery to help get it. Her hair is just locked down solid. Oh, is she like a Lego character? Yeah, the poor lady. Can I have a look at the photo of her? Oh, I have to find... So she's super glued to her hair. Well, it's quite good for consistency, isn't it?

Yeah, oh, like she's super down flat because it was the style that she was looking for, but it has not moved since January. She hasn't been able to get rid of it. Because how much are you spending on your hair in the morning? You know, it's a good five or ten minutes in the morning, isn't it? Yeah, it probably is. She's saving those valuable minutes.

She's like a bald person. But she's been quite vocal about it. She's putting things up on TikTok as well, you know, just as she's going off to the surgeon. But yeah, the poor lady. Why don't they just shave her hair off? Well, I guess that might be... Oh, I see.

It's quite... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I see. It's very good. You couldn't shave that off, could you? No. So there you go. If you ever thought about putting glue on your hair,

that's a good recommendation not to do it. You did it to your grandfather's eyeball, remember? Oh, well, yeah. They said get the eye drops and then you went and got the eye drops. Yeah, this is the thing. The eye drops

were right next to the super glue on the top of the fridge and when you just, when you're like, I was like 12 years old, you know, when you reach up, you just grab up there

and you're grabbing a little container and you're like, that's sweet, that's where they said it would go. Didn't look at it, put a drop of super glue

inside my granddad's eyeball. And, yeah, he couldn't open it for a while. And I was blacklisted from the family for a little bit there. He was sort of running around going, oh, what are you doing? What are you doing? Yeah, so, yeah. What did they do? Did he have to go and get it?

He had to go and do a hot, yeah, they came out and. They must have some sort of solvent that breaks it down. Break it down to, yeah, in the hospital. I don't know. I wasn't there for that part. Everyone's like, you stay out of there. You've done enough. You've done enough.

We don't want to know. Sleep on your own tonight. Get out of my house. I'm sorry. You banished from the boys' family. Shame upon this family, son. And then your, is this the same grandparents who had a TV curtain? No, that was the other grandparents.

I love the TV curtain. They put the TV to bed at night when it was... Normally, like, very early, the TV had to go to bed. Julian hasn't heard this story. Tell him. No, what is this? So what would happen is we'd watch... They'd have a little bit of cloth, a bit of fabric

that would live on top of the TV, and then they'd roll it down when it was time for the TV, basically, to go to bed. So when they'd had enough of the TV for the night, they'd roll the curtain down. But then they'd put the TV to bed at like 7 o'clock. Oh, yeah, 7 o'clock. And once I'd be like, can I watch the show?

They'd be like, no, no, no, we've got the curtains down now. The TV's gone to sleep. It's like, we can just lift it up. No, no, no, no. Once it was down, that was it. TV was off the rest of the night. There was no encore. It always had to be set to TV one, too.

Like, they would always, like, TV one, put it back to TV one, so you know exactly. And if TV1, put it back to TV1 so you know exactly. And if you didn't turn it back to TV1, oh, there was trouble the next day. I was like, well, you can just change the channel to the news. No, no, it had to be set back to TV1 every night. The little curtain tucked in. They had a great night's sleep. But there were so many more great hours of TV viewing to go.

I know. Some of the best TV happens after 7 o'clock. Not this TV. Well, listen, in our non-COVID scrolling through your feed too, I found a story, Ben Boyce, which you might be interested in.

Pigs have been trained to play video games with their snouts. Really? Now, this seems like a great use of resource and scientific brain at this current point in history.

Here's a go with the vaccine? Look at these pigs. Look at these pigs. I've spent 12 months every day of training these pigs to play video games with their snouts. Oh, that's okay. Okay. You're fired.

Yeah, true. You've been coming out with a vaccine. Oh, yeah, but I've got pigs. Oh, I thought you said train pigs how to play video games. No, but that's what they can do now. Who's spent time on this? Do you know whereabouts in the world this is?

Ohio State University, so in America. The height of COVID. Height. You couldn't get a worse COVID country in this schmucks teaching pigs how to play video games with their snouts. It's impressive when you watch it, though. Scrolling through your feed, the non-COVID edition.

Yeah, yeah, nah. Yeah, nah. Yeah, nah. The whole movie. Yeah, nah. She'll be right. And at the end of the day. Jono and Ben.

Breakfast on the hits. Everyone waking up this morning to 72 hours of a bit of a snap lockdown for Auckland and the rest of the country at level two as well. Did you get this civil defence alarm going off on your phone last night? It gave me a heck of a fright last night. They could have a more gentle one, couldn't they? Because you're already on a little bit of, you know, you watch the press conference and you're like, okay, and then suddenly like, what is this? It was sort of like, I understand in an earthquake or a hurricane bit of, you know, you watch the press conference and you're like, okay, and then suddenly like, what is this? What is this?

It was sort of like, I understand in an earthquake or a hurricane or something, you want to bang, bang, bang, but not just like a hay going into lockdown.

Yeah. That could be a bit more gentle. Everyone got it in the house at the same time too. And it was like surround sound around all the phones. Stop dropping the roll. What's going on?

Pack up your belongings. Get out of the house. Yeah. So 72 hours. Hopefully it's just a short, sharp your belongings. Get out of the house. Yeah, so 72 hours. Hopefully it's just a short, sharp, you know, a little short, sharp one. Everyone stay kind. Team of five million and other cliches.

You know? You've got to stay kind, eh? Did she say stay kind last night? I can't remember. I can't remember. Did she do a be kind? I think she did. Yeah.

But I can't remember quite. Yeah. Well, I can tell you Ben has not been kind to me today, Jacinda. I'm going to tell on you. I've been very nice to you. Yeah, no. But you were saying this morning, which I thought was remember quite, yeah. I can tell you, Ben has not been kind to me today, Jacinda. I'm going to tell on you. I'll be very nice to you. Yeah, no. But you were saying this morning, which I thought was quite interesting, Jacinda obviously saying no need to, you know, supermarkets will be open,

the chemists will be open, no need to panic buy. But as soon as you hear that, a lot of people... All I want to do is panic buy. Yeah, stay away, they'll be open, just take your time. But you're like, well, what if they're not? We've got to get down there. Wild scenes last night I've seen of the supermarket filling up. Yeah.

Did you panic buy a Jew? No. Screw that. I'd rather just stay at home because I feel like if you go out now, you're almost going at the busiest time. Yeah. You're interacting with more people.

Yeah. So why would you go last night? You know? Because as Producer Humphries was saying when we were talking about earlier today, you're probably at that stage, you probably had your dinner at 7am or you knew what you were going to have for dinner last night.

You're going to survive the rest of the night. You could at least wait till the next day, put a mask on and go to the supermarket. And I just always, as soon as they say this, I've got this unreasonable desire just to wipe my bottom. Furiously. And not stop. Not stop.

Just go 24 pack, wipe, wipe. Well, after that civil defence alarm, I definitely needed to, I see what happened now. I see why you needed all that toilet paper.

That's why you need to purchase toilet paper. But we've put together a wee album because we want everyone to be kind and we want everyone to be safe

and we want some important messages to get out here, out there to New Zealand. So here you go. I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want,

and that's for you to stay healthy with this crassly put-together album of dated parody songs to remind you of handy hygiene tips like updated love advice from the Spice Girls. If you want to be my lover, you've got to sanitise your hands. And let's face it. Oh, sorry, you probably won't get that pun just yet. But there's more great hygiene advice from The Weeknd. I can't touch my face when I'm with you.

It's a bad habit. Bad habit. All right, stop. Time to hammer it home with some Hammer Time. Can't touch this. Don't know. Nuh-uh. Can't touch this.

If-force terminal. Uh-oh. Can't touch this. Don't know. Nuh-uh. I can't touch this. If I was terminal. Uh-oh. I can't touch this. Handrail. Man, sneeze into your elbow. And you could be beetling the sniffles with the beetles. I want to wash my hands. For 20 seconds and then let them dry properly.

Now, that's what I call COVID-19 is out now. COVID-19, can you go at least With these handy tips We hope you make To everyone pulling a sickie today, you're not fooling anyone. Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Spy, know what's up? Spy.co.nz Alrighty, get yourself ready.

It's time for your daily update on Chris Hemsworth's workout routine. How many burpees has he been doing today, Julia? He's been doing at least 450,000 maybe. We've been doing that every day last week. So obviously with the Framing Britney Spears documentary coming out in the US, everyone's kind of been putting pressure on Justin Timberlake to apologise because he didn't come off

very well in the documentary with how he sort of treated Britney Spears and talked about her publicly. So he, over the weekend, posted on Instagram a public apology. He said specifically to Britney Spears as well as Janet Jackson. Now, if you remember back in

2004 they performed at the Super Bowl and it was called the Nipple Gate where her breast was exposed by him. Whether or not that was... It looks choreographed. Apparently it was a costume malfunction or a wardrobe

malfunction is what they called it, right? Yeah, so he addressed that. He said he wants to take full accountability of his actions and wants to sort of better himself from now. He also mentioned that the industry is set up to benefit men and that he wants to be part of that change where it's more equal in the Hollywood music industry as well. Good on him.

You just said everyone demands a public apology now, Ben. How is it to be public? Why couldn't you just send them a private apology? Well, he's probably done that as well, but you're right. It's probably one of those things that everyone wants. Public apology! Yeah. I know.

Yeah, no, good on him. And I don't think, I don't know him from a bar of soap. I don't even know bars of soap. I use body wash. But he doesn't seem like a mean individual, does he? No. Justin Timberlake? Yeah, he seems pretty, he's got his head screwed on, right?

Good on him for apologising. And the Framing Britney Spears documentary is finally going to be available to watch in New Zealand because it was only in the US. It'll be released today on 3 now at midday. So if you want to watch it, if you want to know what it's all about,

then you can there as well. Why don't they just play it on television? I don't know. Surely there'd be a gimme for three to just biff it on TV. That's a good point. Maybe they've only got streaming rights. Who knows? Who cares? They've put our show on for many years. Surely they can fag anything up there.

We filled their airwaves for seven years of just nonsense. Half of it, I'm like, God, is that... Maybe it's only good stuff now. Maybe we're like, hey guys, we've learned our lesson. Anyway, are you going to watch the doco? Are you going to watch the doco?

I think I will if we're in lockdown then. May as well use that time to... I find those things hard to watch, those things. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. Why, because of the Wi-Fi connection or...? Yeah, mainly that. Yeah.

A bit stop-starting. Yeah, exactly. And Pink and her nine-year-old daughter have released their first duet together. Her daughter is an incredible singer. Very much got Pink's genes. I think we're going to give this song a bit of a play after seven o'clock, but this is it. Cover me in sunshine.

Show me what good times. Called Cover Me in Sunshine. Oh, isn't that beautiful? Mother-daughter combo. Could you guys collaborate with your kids in some way? Who? I don't know, you guys? Well, not singing-wise.

I've done a little bit of stuff with one of my daughters on TV sort of stuff and online and stuff. Yeah. Very cute. Yeah, but then she gets too good, you know? Like, it's all right, mate. Stay in your lane. Stay in your lane. You're a kid.

I don't get really shot up by a nine-year-old at the time. I notice you hear more of Pink than you do her daughter in that song, so maybe that's her version of like, hey, stay in your lane, mate. This is mummy's gig. This is just a cute little PR thing we're doing. Yeah, you can have your little sing-along, but you know who's the real singer here.

Yeah, exactly. We apologise in advance. Sorry about that. Sorry about that. I'm sorry to rope you into this. Sorry you've been dragged into this. Jono and Pen. Breakfast on the Heads.

The Heads. The Heads. Wrapping up our show on a Monday. Hey, Helen. Girl. We want to bring some positivity to New Zealand because it's a surreal old day as New Zealand kind of goes, the levels change.

Auckland's in a bit of a lockdown, the rest of the country at level two. Yeah, we want to inject some positivity in your bloodstream, just like the COVID vaccine, except even the anti-vaxxers want our jab. Welcome from Taranaki, Indy. Good to have you on New Zealand's Breakfast. Hi.

Why is it going to be a good day for you? I've almost finished working, so I'm on my way to go see my family today, which is quite cool. Oh, good on you. What do you do for a job, Indy? I'm a nanny, so I live in for two weeks in a full-time nanny. Oh, well, you keep safe there in New Plymouth.

You look after yourself. We'll give you a hell pizzatime mini. Oh, well, you keep safe there in New Plymouth. You look after yourself. We'll give you a hell pizza, okay? Awesome, thank you. Tomorrow on the show, Five Words for $5,000 is back. Hopefully we can have another winner. We had one last week. You have yourself a great day, New Zealand.

Keep safe. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from sex on The Hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast Friends of Skinny