Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Fired On Your Wedding Day

Episode Date: May 28, 2024

Welcome to the untamed realm of the world's Wild Wild Web!  Today we discuss a bride who got fired over a text message on her wedding day!!! Can you imagine? We find out why her boss did that and what the reason was...   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Coming up on the Wild Wild Web, what happened to this bride on her wedding day will shock you. Welcome to the untamed realm of the world's wide web. A swirling vortex of weirdness, bullying and self-obsessed social media posts. In this digital jungle, Jono and Vienna are your fearless guides. Leading you through the wildest parts of the wild, wild web. This is the wild, wild web. We're back again for more Real Stories.

John O'Bannon and Megan are with you right now talking about another crazy, crazy real story we have read about on the internet. And we feel like you need to hear it. That's why the wild, wild web is around. What do the radio shows do before the internet? Geez, they would have had to do some actual preparation and work.

Newspapers. Yeah, you're probably right. Newspapers. You know, I first started out Kevin Black, radio legend, New Zealand radio legend, Kevin Black. I would sometimes push the buttons for Kevin Black. I didn't know that, did you? Yeah, yeah. No, he was

lovely. Very... Well, the most prestigious of all the radio awards in New Zealand is named after him, right? The Blackie. The Blackie Award, yeah. He was a pioneer. Thankfully it's named after him, otherwise it sounds... It always sounds a little bit like... Problematic? Yeah. We're still calling it that?

Yeah. Because it's a surname, you can't. Yeah, that was his nickname. Nickname Blackie. Name on air for many, many years, right? And he was a pioneer. He went out on the titty, didn't he? Radio Hauraki. Yeah, they were broadcasting illegally.

I think he was out there on the ocean. Pretty sure, pretty sure. Anyway, he would tell me stories about doing radio in the 60s, 70s. Wild time, mate. Oh, yeah, I can imagine. None that you're going to share? Wild. I'll just say, just because they had no internet didn't ruin their imagination.

Creative juices were still flowing. I had a book. My mum bought me his book, which was basically his prep book, full of jokes and stuff like that, that he turned into an actual book that was all just jokes. He'd have a 1B5 book with all his notes from over the years. And jokes and things and little quips and stuff. And so it was just like, yeah. His prank calls were like legendary.

My mother-in-law always retells one where he had phoned this lady and convinced her that her automatic garage door opener was controlling planes around the airport and this plane couldn't land. Oh, my God. Simpler time where you could pull the wool over idiots' heads. You know, now everyone's too savvy. Yeah, right, but you could do that back then. So this actual story that's come out today that we've found,

so a bride in the UK, she got married in Cyprus, but she shared the story she got sent, she basically got made redundant on the day of her wedding. The boss sent her a text on her wedding day. Well it's better than a phone call. Phone calls are awkward. She didn't want to ruin the wedding. A half an hour after

the ceremony she checked her phone to realise that firstly she'd been deleted from the work WhatsApp group and she'd got a text from the boss letting her know that she'd been fired. The text read something along the lines of, hey, her name should have been taken out. Hope your wedding went well and you had a nice time away. Oh, so they knew it was the wedding.

Oh, my God. Just wanted to let you know that the decision has been made to unfortunately let you go. Email's been sent in person to email address. Really sorry it didn't work out and all the best for your future. On her wedding day. I mean, you feel like if that's going to happen, and you know it's the wedding,

just wait till the next day, surely. But also, like, a text to fire someone's not okay. No. Are people getting fired over by text now? I get the fact from the manager's POV. Like, if you were the manager, you're like, oh, I don't really want to make this phone call. Don't want to ruin the day.

I've seen the text. Hopefully she doesn't check it till tomorrow, you know. Honeymoon period. It's so shocking. On your day, on the wedding day, though. I mean, it's pretty bad. Maybe the theory was, oh, she'll be so wrapped up in celebrations, won't let this job loss affect her.

She'll be like, oh, I'll go to KISS, I'm getting married. Like how you delete people as friends on Facebook on their birthday. Is that what you do? Yeah, because they don't notice. They're so caught up in... Messages. Oh, really? Because I've never really...

I use a little bit of Facebook for work, but never had my own real personal one. So I don't have... So do people... They don't get obviously notified when you delete them. No. But then if they go to find, oh, what's Megan up to?

How many from her? They'll then find out, right? No, most awkward, I don't really engage in Facebook too much. I'm not like going around deleting people on their birthdays. But like if you, I have deleted some people in the past that then re-friend you and you're like, no, we were friends and we're not now and you didn't do it. So I must have done it. Is that a bit of a glitch?

So how awkward being like. I think it's a glitch. Are you, is this like you are literal friends or you're just social friends? Just like social Facebook acquaintances. And you're like, we haven't spoken for years. So I was like, oh, no, it's okay. I'll just unfriend. And then they refriend you and you're like, what?

You got off Facebook, didn't you? Yeah, I sort of started it, but that was part of the reason why. Because at first I was like, oh, maybe this could be quite a private thing. And then we could share photos that we were just privately. But then you'd see people would request friendships and you're like, oh, I know this person. I like this person, but I don't want to share these photos with them. But then you'd see them around places and you'd be like, oh, God, I haven't actually accepted their request. And I just found it a bit awkward.

Yeah, right. My friend, every year he does a Christmas cull. And so throughout the year, he's got 50 friends. He's like, I'm going to have 50. Wow. But then people will just like, he'll accept any request for the rest of the year, but at Christmas time he'll go,

I'm going to narrow it down to 50 and make the Christmas cull. Like a business. Yeah, like a business. And then I don't think he texts people on the day or anything. He says, I'm sorry, you've been cut. I'm just trying to find out. I don't actually know. How do you find out how many friends you've got?

Can it be a bone of contention if you kill someone? I have 166 friends. That's a lot. I don't have that many friends. No, 25. It's like coming up to my birthday and I'm like, who would I invite? I think I've got one friend. Yeah, that's the thing.

That's crazy. And do you care for what they're posting? Do you care? Do you know, in your feed, sometimes people pop up and I'm literally like,

I don't know who that is. They're so bad. Why am I seeing them kissing a baby? Yeah. I mean, the other social medias are like that, right?

Instagram and TikTok and things like that. You can follow that and you don't necessarily have to be friends. It's just not like Facebook was like, these are your friend group.

And then, and fine, you know, you can accept everyone if you want to be friends. It just felt like Facebook was like, these are your friend group. And then, and fine. You can accept everyone if you want to accept everyone. Social media's weird. It is a weird thing. I remember a contestant from a reality show got a bit salty with me. We interviewed them.

And then they were back at the radio station the following week. And they're like, I followed you on Instagram. You didn't follow me back. I was like, I don't know how to. So then they had to show me how to. And so now I follow them. I haven't unfollowed them.

I said that to you when I started here. I'm like, you don't follow me. But I only did that as a joke. I would never actually say that to someone seriously. I follow you now. I know. Yeah. You comment facetious things on my posts.

Well, she didn't follow. Oh, you're getting horned up over ice cream, you two. You and Andrew. I did an ad for ice cream. I was like, this is the horniest ice cream commercial I've ever seen. There's probably been a lot of horny ice cream commercials, eh? There probably is.

There was a horny chocolate biscuit commercial. Yeah, that's what we think of Carla Spencer. Carla Spencer, that was pretty horny, wasn't it? It's a horny industry, the chocolate biscuit. Please don't say horny. It's so weird. Ice cream is a horny industry too, because the way you eat an ice cream makes it, you know,

you're all horned up over an ice cream. I don't know if it's the last time I've heard someone say horny. Horny. Horny is a fun word to say, actually. It's horny. Horny. Let's go to the horniest products. Or like judge by ad?

Or just a category. Tell you what, I'm going to tell you the story and you're going to go, sure you did, but there is a shop that sells adult toys and the lights coming.

Peaches and Cream. Adult toy megastore. I don't think it is actually. It's like near the motorway and stuff. It's kind of like Newmarket way into Auckland and I was driving up the other day and I was parked at a light

so I was looking across. Oh, Gigi. Yeah, it's G was looking across oh gg yeah it's gg and they've got some really really clever billboard like advertising in the in the window they've got one of those um things well basically it is it's a sex toy but then they're like yeah sure this is a face massager you know like how everyone always says all their stuff is actually really clever oh it's a spin of a tiger opposite oscar's school oh that brings clever. Oh, it's a spin of a tongue. Is that opposite Oscar's school? Oh, that brings him and the boys a lot of joy. And the prison. And the prison.

Right next to the prison as well. Yeah, I know the prison. But I was like, they're really clever, all their stuff they've done. They've kind of put a bit of a twist on it. So this is just going the horniest foods in general. Okay. This is an interesting one. Whipped cream.

Artichoke. What eggplant would have to be out there, wouldn't it? Oh, these are aphrodisiacs. Oh, sorry. That wasn't artichoke. I was just going to make you horny. Yeah, no. Watermelons do, apparently.

Oysters are meant to, right? It's just 90% water. That's what they're thinking. I don't know if that's true or not. Oysters. Is strawberries one? Strawberries is one, yep. I've never had know if that's true or not. Oysters. Is strawberries one? Strawberries is one. Yep.

I've never had a strawberry and gone, oh, jeez. I live opposite a strawberry farm, and I've eaten a lot of strawberries in a day. And you never go all horned up over a strawberry? I've got the shirts, but. Quite opposite. I'm horny, but I also need to go to the bathroom, so it's where it gets itself. Take a quick break for the while. We're back shortly

welcome back adverts okay horniest adverts okay 10 TV ads so sexy they might as well be

adult films okay the first one Carlos Spencer's Toffee Pops ad comes up yeah that was that was Carlos Spencer

in some white boxes. Yeah, great looking guy, Carlos. Still has not let himself go. Yeah, one of my heroes growing up. I just loved Carlos. Hey, I have a feeling, was him and Andrew Mertens like... Yeah, they kind of tussled for the number one. You're either a Carlos fan or a Mertens fan.

I mean, to be honest, you could love both. No, I can't get past it. It divided a lot of people because they're both great players, but very different. And so whatever you like. And I was a huge backer, much to my Canterbury family's disgust of Carlos Spencer, but I loved him. You prick.

And I loved him. Every time I get to meet him, I'm like, Carlos, he knows who I am. It's very exciting. I get very excited. Because, yeah, I was a Mertens girl. Trying to grow my hair like Carlos, trying to look like Carlos. He's still trying. I still probably am, actually.

You're right. You've got blonde hair now, yeah. That's probably exactly how Carlos was running it for a while. You're right. I'm sorry, Carlos. Yeah, but every time I see him, he still looks as good as he did when he was playing. He's incredible. Ran into Ruben.

Didn't you put gum in his, didn't you shake his hand? You had gum in your hand? Yeah, yeah. And you ended up with your gum in your hand? Yes, yes, 100%. We were just walking in from outside, and I put gum out of my mouth, and I was just holding my hand,

and he was in reception. He's like, g'day, mate. And I'm like, uh-oh. I've got gum in my hand. I have to do something. So I put it behind my ear, like just tried to, panicked. Absolutely panicked.

That's better than shaking your hand with gum. Okay, next horniest New Zealand commercial. Only the crumbliest, flakiest chocolate. Oh, the flakhead. Tastes like chocolate. Didn't we watch that a while ago and it was quite horny? Yeah, they were kind of frolicking through the bushes. And the field and stuff.

It's all like soft focus. Yeah, and this is another goodie. This is a classic. Here we go. Ooh! Ah! Ooh! Ah! They were on a yacht. No, they weren't. They were just getting Fruju.

Splashed at them. Yeah, water splashed all over their faces and they're trying to eat Fruju. Ah! It's gonna hit you. Oh, water splashed all over their faces and they're trying to eat Fruju. It's going to hit you. Oh, that's very erotic. It's going to hit you. It's going to hit you. And then they just splash the chips in their face.

Pineapple Fruju is just a great summertime treat. Is it raspberry and lime? Oh, yeah. And grapefruit. Oh, pineapple's the OG for me. Fruju's are great. They're great. They're great.

Great time. The 2000 Herbal Essences shampoo. She's got the Urge commercial. Okay. That's come up. I'll play that one for you. I don't know if you remember this one. Oh, did we get that in New Zealand?

I don't remember that. She's got the urge. She's a lawyer in a court case, and then all of a sudden these sexy guys come bursting in and wash her hair. Oh, God. Mid-case. Mid-case. She's got the urge.

And she's got the urge. Oh, Moritz ice cream. Moritz. Oh, yeah, when she's like, and she bites it, and it's like. The original ASMR. Ice cream. Horny industry. It's a horny ice cream.

There you go. I feel like, wasn't there a coffee ad? Makona have me. Have more M's. Yeah, that was a horny coffee ad. Makona have me. And then they're saying the horniest of all commercials. Can't beat the Mad Butcher's meat.

Can't beat the Mad Butcher's meat. Oh, that's actually the spinoff.co.nz for those horniest New Zealanders. The Mad Butcher ads, they all get a smile on your face, don't they? The ones, you can't beat the Mad Butcher. Do you think they knew what they were doing? I think so. Do you think they knew? Are you joking?

It's like my Nova's choice of crack. They're going to know what you're doing. Who just can't beat the Mad Butcher's meat? Who came up with that? They're a genius. But it's catchy. And it's one of those ones you're like, well, it's true. You can't beat the Mad Butcher.

It's great prices. Great thing. Good quality. Good quality meats I used to Back when I was very young I would have been about 20 I used to record the mad butcher Oh did you

For his radio ads Oh because you used to work As a production engineer Yeah yeah And he would be $9.99 a kilo It was $19.99 a kilo He's so lovely

But like I used to just Press record And he would have a script And it would sometimes Take half an hour But it's because Like he would have a script. And it would sometimes take half an hour. But it's because he'd got so frustrated with himself, it would be like expletives.

It was just like him. I think he might be dyslexic or something too, right? Yeah. But he would get so frustrated with himself. I didn't care. It was hilarious. But he would go for like half an hour and he'd be like swearing. One of the most generous people you'd ever meet, the Mad Butcher, eh?

Yes, yeah. And he would always remember my name and he would always ask me how I was. And he was really lovely. He was a busy guy. Busy guy. He knew everyone. There's no one he doesn't know. I know.

And then he'd be like, Wouldn't he be like to you Oh you're going over to Europe I was going to do my OE He's like you're going to Europe And I was like yeah He goes you're going to France And I'm like yeah we are going to France

My wife and I He goes I'll give you Stacey Jones' number Now Stacey Jones League legend He was playing in France At the time Worry is co-coach now

Yeah he is And I'm like oh that I mean I love Stacey Jones I'm like that's lovely But I don't think I'd have met Stacey Jones I don't think he would want me to have his number give him a call

he's like make sure you give him a call when you're in France I'm like I can't call Stacey Jones is like can you stop giving out my number he's like hey Stacey

you don't know me but the man was just giving do you mind if I I don't know what what do you want from me do you want to hang out do you want to like

croissant or what just because we're in a different country doesn't make this okay. I know, yeah. I'm sure Stacey probably, having met Stacey now, he would have been probably fine. But I just thought, I can't score Stacey Jones.

I don't blame you. Like, yeah. It's one of those things. It's a real parent thing to do, eh? Make sure you visit such and such. You're like, I could, but, you know. You don't think they want me to. Probably more your friend than my friend.

But anyway, yeah. Well, your parents always push you on to people, don't they? They love that. You must go and stay at... Really? Yeah. Or like your parents are like, oh, Jono and Ben are coming down to Nelson.

Tell them to come for dinner. I'm like, I don't want to come for dinner. I don't want to come to your house for dinner. It's a lovely gesture. It is a lovely gesture. It's so nice, but it's just like, what? Generation of like,

you've got to visit such and such. You've got to call her and see. Swing on in. They love it. They love a mid-morning swinging. Don't they, the boomers? Yeah.

I do notice that over New Year's because we stay in the Coromandel and boy, John and Kathy, my in-laws, they have some mid-morning swinging. People just come and knock in and sit down. They'll chat for an hour and a half.

A cup of tea. Even just like, people turning up unannounced. Yeah, absolutely fine with it. I would never go to your house and be like, hi, here I am. You're always organized, right? It is kind of a cool thing and a weird thing.

Like a 90s thing. They love it. My mum loves to stay at someone's house too. I'm going there. I'll just ask if they want me to stay at their house. It's that thing. And they do that. She reciprocates to other people

and they're happy to do it like we've become so impatient so anti-social I know yeah we were like oh I'll go in there but I was like I feel a bit weird going

hey I'm coming can I stay at your house you know like it feels like a weird thing but they don't care yeah they do it you know

you're like I'll just stay at a hotel or try and stay whatever or sort something Airbnb or something maybe maybe that generation they wanted to care about it. They didn't want people staying, but they were all too polite to say no. But now we all know how busy everyone is.

You're like, oh, I'm not going to bother them with this. Yeah. Yeah. So they love it. Love it. Mum loves a swing by and a stay in someone's house. Or generally just care more about people than we do. Yeah, maybe.

Might be right. We pretend to on social media, don't we? Hey, well, listen, thank you so much for listening. And, geez, where did we start? Where did we start? Well, we started with Kevin Black. But it was before we got to the wedding. Oh, the wedding, yes.

We got to horny ice cream. Someone got fired. During a wedding. And then horny ads and then boomers. Have you ever been fired from anywhere? Like fired, fired? Sorry, you're going to have to walk out now. Megan.

It's you. Well, it wasn't fired from the company. No. It was just an adjustment, wasn't it? Yeah. I don't think I've ever been. I mean, you've had the same thing with TV shows being cancelled. You know, things like that.

Yeah. That's, I guess, technically is a fire. I was trying to think if I, when I was in charge of hiring people, if I ever fired anyone. Who were you in charge of? When I had a cafe. I had like 10 staff or whatever. Oh, did you have to fire people?

Nah, we had people ghost us, just not turn up to work ever again. Twice? And then they assumed that they would have lost their job anyway. Yeah, that was them resigning, I guess. God, I'd be terrible at firing someone i know i wouldn't be able to god i never had to do it yeah i know it'd be so bad i'd just be like no how'd it go oh well i've signed them on for another 24 months it would be me you're meant to get rid of them yeah i couldn't it would be hard i have a friend who's like that, and she's in a pretty high management position, but she's just too lovely,

and she keeps hiring useless people, and he runs around like, why have you hired this person? She's like, oh, I ran into them down the street. They were out of work, so I thought I'd give them a job. Oh, yeah. Lovely.

Terrible for productivity. It's been. Yeah. But he also likes productivity, too. Yeah, I know. It's tough, isn't it? Well, thanks for listening. Have a great day.