Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: Apparently We Aren't Confident In Front Of A Camera...

Episode Date: February 28, 2023

We have been left off a panel 5 Words Win! Cash N Car Announcement What's the best thing you own? Chris Hipkins! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome, it's the John O'Bien Podcast. Welcome, it's the John O'Bien Podcast. Thanks to Challenge. Welcome, it's the John O'Bien Podcast. Thanks to Challenge Petrol Service Stations. First of the month. First of the month. First of the month.

Wake up, wake up. That's what you wanted to play right there, didn't you? Yeah, I was hoping someone would wake up. Oh, sorry. You wanted me to play the song First of the Month. Yeah. To kick things off. Thank you, Producer Joel.

What date was it again as the next thing loads oh yeah really the computer's just having a week what's the it's the first of month what day is it here we go and it's the first of month first of march two months of the year already done does it how does that make you feel oh you know me i don me, I don't like time marching on and feeling like I haven't accomplished things as well. You've accomplished some stuff. We did do, last week was cool.

What would you, ideally in your calendar of stuff you would have liked to have done by 2023, what would you have liked to have knocked off by the end of Feb? Oh, well, I haven't, lots, just, you know, everything. Just stuff. Lots of stuff. Yeah, right. Just,, just, you know, everything. Just stuff. Lots of stuff. Yeah. Just, just stuff.

You know, there's always stuff. There's always, yeah. There's always, that's the thing about stuff. Is there a lot of stuff that you haven't done that you wish you had done? There's always more stuff to do. That's always the thing as well. That's the thing with stuff. It just keeps coming around.

Well, your stuff, you just create, create more and more stuff for you. Yeah, I know. Does it stress you out not having all this stuff done by the end of Feb? Oh, are you trying to stress me out here? No, but I always feel like I haven't done enough. And then you're like, oh, yeah, you know. It's just one of those things. You can't do any more.

No, I know. But I always just do more better stuff. I want to do more stuff. Better stuff. You're right. I could probably do more. You're doing as much stuff as anyone could do. I could do, but it's just that. You'd like it to be

a better level of stuff yeah hey I love the show the show is great I enjoy it it's fun a lot of fun we had a fun show

this morning actually didn't we we did Joel got involved with a few things which is good it was awesome you guys let me talk

on the show four words I think probably never been allowed to talk again after the four words as well yeah producer Joel

takes a bit of a backseat when the show's running on here we discussed this yesterday podcast intro yeah it's free reign mate we're done the the

the A squad are done for the day it's just like what do they call it the NBA garbage time yeah right on the losers last 30 seconds

the game's won all lost all lost probably lost probably lost we just get the get on there get off the bench mate

you can have a look. But, you know, it's interesting because you were talking about the best thing that is in your household that you own. Well, your wife owns a hook that holds her handbag. Yeah. We get a lot of street talk about it. She keeps it in her handbag, just puts it on the table, and it just holds the bag, suspends it in the air. Now, what's one thing that you could get rid of in your house that you're like oh this is just oh can i suggest something on behalf of your property yeah your fiberglass cow yeah it sits in the backyard i know that's that again

talking about stuff i need to do i keep saying i need to give it a makeover i had a fiberglass cow many years ago when we had a tv show that we'd sneak beer and a different ben sneak beer into stadiums and we bought a cow to sneak a little a little keg inside to a waikato game in hamilton there and um yeah and i end up with a cow in the backyard but it's had a hard life it's been taken to many places it's fallen over one of the horn things the fiberglass has now come off so i'm like i need to fix to paint it. Maybe there's someone that is into novelty cow restoration listening to the podcast. Who would you take that to? I don't know. I don't know.

Spray painter maybe? Yeah, I thought it would be quite cool to make it look quite arty. We'll not follow the traditional Friesian cow look, but just go quite arty and colorful. Sort of like the the yeah you know like the toilets

yeah let's go a bit crazy on it so yeah but yeah I haven't got that far so there's stuff there's just stuff I need to do

maybe we'll go home today and do that Joel what's one thing you can get rid of out of your place out of my place and you can't say your flatmates

I have a Playstation yeah I was actually given a PlayStation 4, but I don't have a TV for a while ago. And I kind of don't want to sell it because I was given it. So, yeah. It's kind of just sitting around doing nothing.

Interesting conversation. If you have been gifted something, can you sell it? Because I was like, because a guy from work, he doesn't work anymore, but he gave it to me like a really nice thing

because he upgraded. And I used it for a bit, but I don't really use it or have a tv but i feel like if i post it on facebook he'd be like what the hell this guy just is selling something i gave them for free now would you i've given you a lot of stuff yeah would you be offended if he went hey i don't want that and i sold it uh i forgot what i gave you so i wouldn't know what it was what did i get i know it's cooking appliances a couple pans a toaster and a rice cooker bloody generous I forgot what I gave you So I wouldn't know what it was What did I get? I know it was cooking appliances A couple pans

A toaster And a rice cooker Bloody generous Have you used any of those? No I think they got like Nine rice cookers or something Because everyone gave them stuff Yeah

Oh yeah I've used a couple of the pans You've used a couple of the pans? Yeah My pans? Yeah they're really good pans So if he went I'm not using this rice cooker

I'm not using the pans I'm going to go sell it Would you be offended by this? No. I wouldn't either. Because you've made that decision, in my head, I've made that decision to get rid of it.

I could have sold it, I didn't, given it on, but some people do. Don't get me wrong, there'll be a part of me going, oh, okay. Oh, right.

But then I'll be like, you did me a favour taking it off my hands anyway, even though I forced all these items on you. I feel like a toaster is probably different to a PlayStation, which is worth a couple hundred bucks as well. Yeah. The berm out the front, people just, I don't know what it is,

but you put something outside your house sometimes, it just goes within seconds. It's like people must just be doing laps around neighborhoods just looking for people. There are some savvy people. Yeah. The ones that go around garage sales and looking for people there are some savvy people yeah the ones that go around like garage sales

and things they can make they can make some coin but yeah if you're just leaving like a garden appliance out there you just

oh just dot in and grab something else people will be out there yeah I know you've got to be careful right there I think I said this before my friend was mowing

his lawns and left the lawnmower running had to empty the catcher took it inside to the garden and came back out someone was wheeling off the lawnmower while it was to empty the catcher, took it inside to the garden bin, came back out,

someone was wheeling off the lawnmower while it was going. Same thing with one of the kids' bikes when they were little. We were going to go for a bike ride and left the thing and went back inside and it came out that someone was about to put it in the car. We're like, oh, no, no, we're just about to go. I guess it did look like it was just sitting out there for someone to ride. The boom is fair game. Yeah, it does feel like it. Put it on the boom, it's public property.

Now, Joel, you got your hand up politely. Now it's the podcast. You can talk. You can talk. You don't need to put your hand up. A-team's resting. I'm just... How's your hammies, John?

How's your hammies, mate? I'm just... You've got to stretch it out. Here's a towel. I think this could be a good one. We're looking outside, and they have an iHeartRadio lounge. Fight for life. They're doing a press conference there this afternoon, I believe.

And I was just thinking for you Ben and Jono if you could choose one person one well known person in New Zealand that you could take on in a celebrity boxing match

and your charity of choice gets a million dollars so you're doing a great thing you're doing a great thing towards it who are you choosing to box it can't be Jono

you can't choose each other well no we didn't I think once upon a time when we were on TV they went hey you guys should fight each other. And we were like, no, we'd do it if it was like a wrestling thing and we could choreograph it coming out.

Full punches. Yeah, no. See, I don't want to punch someone. I'll get hit in the face. But you're talking about stuff to do. It would take so much time and commitment to do it properly because you want to do it properly. Like the training.

I respect everyone that does that. It's amazing what they do. David Seymour? What? No, I don't want to punch anyone. I don't want to get punched by Seymour. Like you're putting yourself out there. The boxers are really putting,

you know, like, I don't know. Muldoon. He's not even around anymore. That chubby little prick in there, mate. That guy's dead didn't he he's just passed away

exactly running scared oh jeez Sean Johnson for you maybe I'd just hug him they'll be like stop

you know when the ref's in there going you're grappling you're hugging again I'd be like yeah I just want to hug Sean Johnson no I'm the same as you

I have no interest no I like the training like if I had the time to do the training aspect I reckon that'd be awesome but yeah I don't know

that's not me I'll go talk to the promoters sign you up for next year anyone he doesn't mind he'll take on anyone he'll Ben will take on David Tua

that only seems fair alright go talk to the promoters yeah someone who's like he's like hit me in the face whatever it doesn't matter and then just

yeah if you don't want to hit people in the face, that's fine. I'm fine to be. Yeah, exactly. He's cool with it. Enjoy the podcast. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We did a bit of a road trip yesterday to Rotorua.

It was a lot of fun, actually. But on the way back, we were listening to a bit of talkback radio, weren't we? We were, yeah. We must say what we were doing in Rotorua, we were attending the local commerce industry's business events. And, you know, we've probably got no business being at a business event, Ben, but it was a fun evening, wasn't it? It was. It was awesome, actually.

It was really cool. Thank you for having us. And, yes, on our way back, we were listening to Newstalk ZB, Marcus Lush. We really respect and admire marcus lush great broadcaster one of new zealand's greats and you know when you're listening to another radio show and you're driving back and you're like oh this is we could participate and he was talking about monster trucks have you heard about the scambles shambles with the monster trucks people

went to the monster trucks in tauranga bay park they said it was a nightmare yeah they said it wasn't as exciting as they thought, right? It was very underwhelming. Yeah. And so then the promoter of the Monster Trucks said, well, New Zealand's a giant hole, and this is the reason why nothing ever comes here. He started to snap back.

Yeah, and I think some events have been cancelled. Some are continuing. It's all a bit messy. Marcus was talking about it in the media. He was throwing the phone number out there to call. And we know what it's like being on the radio when someone throws out the phone number. We do it every day. We're like, please, someone just call. Yeah, and it was a lonely

quiet Tuesday night too. We could hear that Marcus needed to call. So you called back. We helped out a broadcaster in need. You were like, I'm going to call. I'll be Jonathan because that's your full name. I'm like, okay. But then you ended up roping me into it. Jonathan Marcus evening. I'm like, okay. But then he ended up roping me into it. Jonathan Marcus evening.

Marcus Jonathan, good evening. What's happening? Marcus, I can't live a lie anymore. I went under a fake pseudonym to make it to air this evening. Oh, great. Yeah.

What was your fake pseudonym? Well I'm embarrassed to say I'm Jono from Jono and Ben and we're heading back from Rotorua heading back from Rotorua right now listening to your show Marcus and I was going to take my son to the monster trucks but apparently

the photo sent the country to the shithole and he's candid but I just wanted to tell the promoter if he thinks Podong is a shithole we've got far bigger ones around the country. Hey, did you raise much money? Oh, for the Red Cross? Yeah, no, we did. We put a bit of money

into the big fund, the NZME fund, which I think got over $11 million in the end. Oh, but you were doing like, what were you doing, like a supermarket trolley or something? Yeah, like there was a little quirk that happened with it, is that right? Yeah, we were riding a golf cart around Mount Smart Stadium for the equivalent of the length of New Zealand.

So 1,600km. It took us 53 hours, I think. We came to see you in Bluff, mate. Why didn't you just actually take the golf cart down the country? Well, I don't think you can drive on the roads with a golf cart. I don't know if it's legal. Yeah, so we decided to do it around Mount Smart Stadium. But, you know, it was nice to do something.

I think all Kiwis, you want to do something to help. You just feel for everyone that, you know, have their livelihoods and their houses and have been in that situation. So it was nice to do something and to pitch in and get Kiwis supporting Kiwis. And you know us, Marcus, we're not practical people, so that's all we could do.

Nice to hear from you guys. And then it spurred on a bit more conversation with Brian, who's like, you couldn't take a golf cart down the country. The tyres wouldn't last. So a whole new angle of conversation. There we go, Marcus Lush there. Great show. It was a great show.

That bit when we were on, or just in general? Just in general. I think we brought the tone down. The Hits, the jonah and ben podcast this is the first of the month and i was singing this song bone thugs and harmy it's a throwback song this should be our tradition on the first of every month we should play some of the song it's it's a fantastic in fact we should play the whole thing you know one of the joys one of the joys of working on the hits is...

But Crossroads is a better song for them. Do you like Crossroads? But it's not applicable for the first of the month, is it? Okay, we'll do a text poll, because it is before seven, it's a bit loose. You know, are you a part of the Six O'Clock Club? Do we play Bone Thugs-N-Honey? The whole thing.

The whole thing. Next. Matt Anderson, our boss, he's not awake. Wow, he's always listening. He won't like that. Just take a gamble. But it is the first of the month, and apparently that's the end of summer. Yeah, so that's pretty much just the start of autumn now. And when you look at the summer, it's been a shocker, hasn't it, weather-wise?

For some parts, though. South Island's had an absolutely— Yeah, that's true. Yeah. There's been a drought in some parts of the South. Yeah, I was just going to say that. Auckland in particular had the most rain over summer since records began in 1955.

So yeah, that's pretty incredible, the most amount of rain. But the good news for the country is the next 10 days looks like a lot of sunshine. Particularly in the North Island, those affected by the cyclone as well. So over the next 10 days it's looking alright

even though we are heading away from summer well in Rolleston I think it got up to like 38 at some point over summer it's been crazy in areas crazy do you feel ripped off? do you want to go and start summer again?

do you think we need to change summer? I know David Seymour ACT Party leader always just chucking stuff out there, isn't he? But I remember once he's spitting out this stuff. He was chucking something out on the news. He's like,

we need to move our summer holidays to Feb. It was his proposition. Although Feb hasn't been much better this year. No. Well, for some areas, but you know, his theory being, you know,

in Vicargill, great, you know, it's been great. His theory being historically that the weather is better in February, which he is right about. But would you do that? Just have a couple of days off for Christmas Day?

Plough on through Jan? And then just get, yeah. Well, it's probably not a bad idea. Yeah, you know. No? Producer Joel, you're not into it? How could you go to like a New Year's Eve festival or something though? Well, you could still have you around there.

You need like five days each side to recover you need to recover normal people we don't need five days of a come down mate actual adults we're fine

we can just go I like to be in bed by nine o'clock New Year's Eve thank you very much maybe the next day I might be a little shaky and dusty

but then the day after I'll be alright mate so we're talking about coming back to work you know second or third maybe you know okay so we're just about coming back to work, you know, second or third, maybe, you know. Okay, so we're just looking at the text machine. Do we play first of the month Bone Thugs in Harmony?

It's loading the data, Bedboys. Yes, play Bone Thugs, 100%. Someone's texting. Really? Do we do it? Producer Humphrey? I don't know. I don't know.

Everyone's a little... He's not even looking at you. He won't even give you eye contact right now know Everyone's a little No he's not even Looking at you He won't even give you Eye contact right now Everyone's a little Gun shy Yes play another one Play Bone Thugs

Play it The whole First of the month song I reckon Is it safe for radio Wait there's no Someone's saying Grow some testicles

Who sang that On the text It's on you Pryor You're putting this on me Yeah Okay Bone Thugs And Harmony next Okay Throw some testicles. Who's saying that? On the text. It's on you, Pryor. You're putting it on me? Yeah. Okay, Bone Thugs-N-Harmony next. Okay.

It's the first of the month. Okay, all right. Next. Couldn't find a more appropriate day for it. Well, yeah, okay. It is the hits. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast.

It is the first of the month, first of March, and we did talk about this song from Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, a flashback. And, Jono, you threw it out there. We're like, well, should we just play this song? It was a huge part of my childhood, Bone Thugs-N-Harmony album. Crossroads is another good one too.

Yeah, Crossroads felt like it was number one for about 36 weeks or something. East 99. It was great. It was great. And I was like, well, let's play first of the month. On the first of the month. Is it THA? Yeah. Now, the text came through of the month. On the first of the month. Is it THA, is it? Yeah.

Now, the text came through. Let's go to the phones right now. Sorry, who do we have here? Geordie. Geordie. Geordie, you text through. Grow some testicles. I assume that was so we grew some testicles and played the song.

Yeah, I said, yeah, the old John and Ben probably would have played it by now. You know we would have. We are the old John and Ben, it's way more disappointing. The older we get, the more disappointing we get.

Geordie, now the issue being, we just had to listen to it while it was on, we're like, let's play it. And then I googled the lyrics and there's a few words

not safe for radio, so we may have to do a wee bit of an edit to the song and maybe we can get away later in the show. Yeah, just blame me, mate. It's all good.

Yeah, okay. All right. Because a few things that I think we'd get in more trouble before we're playing on air. A few words in there that would get us cancelled. Yeah. You know, some real spicy words. Yeah.

So what we'll do is we'll try and do a safer radio edit for you, Jordy. Yeah. And we'll get it on later in the show. Awesome. Thank you. We'll send you out some hell pizza as well, though, to get your Wednesday started. The disappointing old Jono and Ben.

Hey, if you can't have Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, how about Miley Cyrus Flowers? That's a great song. It's, you know, great. The old Jono and Ben playing you some Miley Cyrus. It is the hits. Now on the show, I've been told I'm not allowed to talk about cricket too much. I can buy myself flowers The Hits The Jono and Ben Podcast

Now on the show I've been told I'm not allowed to talk about cricket too much which is fine I accept it not everyone I've had conversations

with my wife she's not that into cricket like I'm into cricket I understand that but yesterday was a pretty big moment it was all over the news it's all over the news today

So that justifies you being able to talk Well when it becomes Mainstream Mainstream of national importance of interest it's all over the news today what so that justifies you being able to talk when it becomes mainstream mainstream of national importance of interest it's the thing that people are talking about that non-cricket fans are talking about then yes does that give you a license to talk about just a little bit and i'm not going to bang on all about it but it was pretty awesome yesterday uh the blackcaps uh winning the second test against england by one run i mean you couldn't get much closer well you couldn't get any closer than this i think that's only the second test against England by one run. I mean, you couldn't get much closer. Well, you couldn't get any closer than this.

I think that's only the second time in test history it's been like a one-run test result. And here was the moment on the ACC Alternate Cometry Collective. Go VAR. Anderson. Oh, down the next side. He's got it! He's got it!

He's got it! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! New Zealand have won a historic test match. Oh, my God! Oh, my God! New Zealand have won a historic test match. Oh, my God! As Jimmy Anderson gets strangled down the leg side, Wagner gets it. Oh, he's done it, he's done it.

For the fourth time in history, a team that has been forced to follow on has turned around and won the match. And New Zealand win. Yeah, pretty epic, wasn't it? Incredible. Yeah. No, good stuff.

Do they end in draws? They end in draws a lot of the time. Yeah, they do. But that's the cool thing about, you know, Brendan McCollum, who's a New Zealand legend, he's now coaching the English side, and he's doing this whole thing they call him Baz Ball, because his nickname's Baz.

An attacking style of play. Which is kind of good for people like yourself. They're like, ugh, cricket, you know. I can understand. I'm a hell of a cricket. Just because you're calling it Baz Ball now doesn't make it any more exciting. Oh, I've changed it to Baz Ball, mate. No, but I guess it's going in with that attitude of trying to make it a little more exciting.

Yeah. That is thrilling, though, and well done, because you had given up on them. I had, actually. I was commenting over the weekend. I'm like, this is going to be a lot. So even me, as an overly optimistic Black Caps supporter, I was like, even me, I'd be like, oh, weird. So how important is this in the scheme of international cricket?

England the best? Well, England are probably one of the best test teams at the moment. They've been winning a whole, yeah, yeah like many many games in a row now since Baz since Baz Ball mate so you know it was good and we haven't lost

stop calling it Baz Ball it's a call of the cricket it's no longer cricket it's Baz Ball now guys and so does this does this put New Zealand like are we number one now no no

we're not no we used to be at that moment and then things fell apart but it's good you know we're a lot better at home in New Zealand much like you much better you're at home i am just safer and more comfortable

so it's good i mean we've got a home record of i think 11 test series in a row we've uh we haven't lost so it keeps that alive but overseas don't talk about overseas mate it's a conversation don't talk to me about bears ball overseas at home domestic bears ball exactly hey next you want to do something because it is early in the morning yeah we met someone last week who stays at Bears Ball overseas. At home, domestic Bears Ball. Exactly. Next, you want to do something because it is early in the morning. Yeah, we met someone last week who stays awake all night. And I want to know if anyone listening right now

is still going from last night, work-wise. We don't want any of the other people. Well, we don't want any of Joel's mob phoning. That'll be interesting as well, producer Joel's mob. But hey, we'll get to that

next on The Hits. We were driving around Mount Smart Stadium in a golf cart last week. Interesting as well, Producer Joel as well. But hey, we'll get to that next on The Hits. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We were driving around Mount Smart Stadium in a golf cart last week. We started on Wednesday morning at this time. It took us 53 hours to drive around Mount Smart Stadium, the equivalent of the length of New Zealand's 1,600 kilometres. Went through the night. One of us was trying to have a nap for a little bit while the other one kept driving just to keep the thing going.

But we realised being at Mount Smart Stadium overnight, they've obviously got security. They have to stay awake all night. Yeah, wonderful. Beulah. Yeah, she was great. She was fantastic. And Vili.

We met there. They stay awake all night. So this is what we wanted to throw out there. We've got some Hell Pizza up for grabs. What are you wincing for there, Producer Humphrey? We do have Hell Pizza up for grabs. He's making that wincing thing and doing hisphrey? No, we do have Hell Pizza for grabs. He's making that wincing thing and doing his head back. No, we can back it.

Have we given away too much Hell Pizza lately? No. Okay, say go for it. 0800 the hits, telephone number. Have you been awake all night working? What do you do? Because I imagine three in the morning, that for us on the golf cart, that was a lonely moment in time.

Oh, yeah, particularly, you know, where you'd gone for a rest, and I had moments I was driving around, and then I would be like, I've just got to stop, and I've got to walk up the steps of Mount Smart Stadium just to try and wake myself up, you know?

So imagine if you're in cosy conditions somewhere. I used to work my day when I first started in radio, when I was trying to, you know, make my way through radio. And radio has a wonderful, it and radio has a wonderful passage of right where you work for free for three years. Yeah. It's a fantastic opportunity.

It is a fantastic opportunity, but I'd start my work day at, I'd get up at 10.30 at night, be in at work by 11, do the midnight to dawn shift, midnight to six, and then- It's a long time for you on radio too. Jesus. A lot of you. There's too much of me. Six non-stop hours. Six hours, yeah.

Double the length of the show that we're doing now. And then what would you do after that? Then I'd go get coffees for Nick and Rog, who were hosting the breakfast show on The Rock at the time. And then I'd go and send out

a talkback radio station that had calendars of the old hosts. And old people would buy the calendars of the old hosts sort of just and old people to buy the calendars what's the calendar of radio oh i mean it's the reason we got into radio so we wouldn't be put on a calendar mate you wouldn't believe the amount of old people that want calendars of old talkback hosts and then i'd phone up and get their credit card details should we put out a hits calendar no we should like a uh why don't we do like a sexy Ann Geddes thing? Ann Geddes used to put babies in pot plants and stuff,

but we'll put ourselves in pot plants. We'll go to Body Shots and get some soft lighting going on. Gary, we're going to get you on. You've been up all night. Yeah, mate. What are you doing? I work down the ports. Oh, wow.

So what time does your shift start? I started around 6 p.m. last night and finished around 6 a.m. this morning. Jeez. How do you stay at, like, what is the lowest hour? When are you like, oh, this is, I'm in the trenches. Around 3 a.m. in the morning. It gets pretty, so you get a bit of a tide, but sort of, we do, I do storage planning on the container ships, so.

Are you used to it now? Do you get used to it? Yeah. I've done it for, I'm thinking, over 39 years down there now. And so what's your schedule? Do you go home and sleep now? Yeah, so I go home and get about six hours sleep and then get up and move around

and then catch up to a balanced sleep at the weekend. Six to six. Do you think after 39 years you could go to the bosses, and then get up and move around and then catch up to balance sleep at the weekend. Six to six. Do you think after 39 years you could go to the bosses, hey, what happened? You shift old Gary to a daytime. Yeah, it's coming close to the end, a couple more years there.

Hey, well, congratulations on a huge tenure, 39 years on the ports. That's amazing. You seen much of Ben's product coming through there, Gary? You catching much of that? No, no, mate. I'm not bringing anything. I'm not, no.

Sometimes he gets nabbed, but other times he gets it through. Gary, we're going to send you out some hell pizza. I hope you have a good sleep today and appreciate you listening to the show. Cheers, mate. Good on you. Love your work, Gary. Diana, still working. You just got off a night shift.

Yeah. What do you do? I'm a nurse. What are your hours? 11 till 7. Wow. Are you like Gary? Is 3 in the morning the worst?

About 4. That's when you hit the wall. 4 o'clock. And do you get rostered on different shifts, or are you always night shift? Yeah, so we have to do 4 in a month. Wow. Jeez. Good on you. And will you go home and sleep now for a few hours? or are you always night shift? Yeah, so we have to do four in a month. Wow, jeez. Good on you.

And will you go home and sleep now for a few hours? Yeah. Yeah. Definitely, yeah. We'll send you out some Alpizza as well. Thank you so much for listening to the show and amazing what you do overnight. Love you guys. Thank you.

I love you too, Diana. And I love you too, Ben. I love you too, John. I love you too, Producer Joel and Producer Humphrey. This little love going around this morning it is the hits the hits the John and Ben podcast

I mentioned yesterday that my son's friend he was like hey I've found a really great great website where you can get high end shoes

for you know a fifth of the price I'm just like legitimate legitimate shoes or not? 100% authentic. Do the people that, do the fine companies that make these shoes originally probably in sweatshops around the world, do they know that somebody else? Those fine, upstanding, multinational companies.

But do they know that these shoes are getting made for nothing? These are made by even younger children. I bet they don't know these are knockoff brands. But anyway, so I went on to the website blindly. I didn't even stop and think. So I went on there. All my details. You name a detail, it was all on there.

Birthday, address, full name, credit card. I was like, take it. Have it all. Now, you're worried yesterday, which I understand you're like, I think I've been scammed because you looked at it on another website. Scam alert. Yeah, and there's nothing quite like the feeling of remorse you get after you've put all your details into a website and gone,

oh, dear God, what have I done? And you go through the comments and people like Daryl74 saying, they charged my credit card double, never got the shoes. Margaret says, got the shoes Margaret says got the shoes the soles fell off within three days Raul came on I'm gathering he worked for the website trying to turn the tide

120% satisfied with his experience but after all that after yesterday afternoon you came and you went oh oh because I sent an email there's an email address on there and what they do is

they pretend they're in New Zealand you know they've got a New Zealand address they've got a New Zealand email, there's an email address on there. And what they do is they pretend they're in New Zealand. You know, they've got a New Zealand address. They've got a New Zealand email, a.co.nz address. And so I sent an email to the customer service support person going, hi, listen, I've purchased these shoes. I've never received a tracking number, never had a text on a tracking number. And my credit card's been charged substantially more than the shoes were advertised for bing we're in rotarua last night ben weren't we i was like oh i've got a

message back from the website hi jono thanks for reaching out your order numbers 4787 has been fulfilled and shipped oh so that's good hey i'll keep you up to date this could be the little internet transaction that could we'll find out will i end up on fair go as one of those boomer schmucks where you're like what were you thinking the one that ends up with like a russian millionaire uh what were you thinking you idiot we'll i'll keep you up to date the hits the jonah and ben podcast no sad to say but that that was summer. Summer apparently, it's ended yesterday. The most rain since records began in some parts of the North Island over summer. It's been a bit of a shocker.

Yeah, but if you're in the South, you'll be like, oh, thank goodness. That was a blinder. If anything, too much. Couldn't have got hotter. Yeah. But yes, a bit of a rip off for some people. We were saying, do you move summer to February earlier in the show? The holidays.

Yeah, it's all options. Are you putting your celebrity weight behind that, Ben Boyce? I'm not going to have any celebrity weight. Look at me. He's 38kgs. Are you putting all 38kgs of you behind that? No weight behind anything, really, to be honest. I did something yesterday.

Most people who have this item in their household would have suffered the same fate. I had to go and buy replacement printer ink cartridges. Oh, yeah. And it was just for the colour yellow. And I'm like, just because I don't have yellow, why can't the black just print black anyway? Yeah, that's the thing.

Just because the magenta's empty, why can't the black Just print black Anyway Yeah that's the thing It won't let you On those Just because the magenta's empty All colour ones Why can't the black work I think if you get one That's all colour You can get black and white ones But if it's all colour It's like yeah

I've had the same frustration I think we've just got A black and white printer now Yeah It's And you go And you know you're in trouble When the item you're wanting

To purchase at Warehouse Stationery Is padlocked to the shelf You're like Oh I'm in for the old f-post cards in for hiding here and it was like hundreds of dollars for you know multiple link cartridges not just one but i googled it it's the most expensive liquid on the planet it's worth more than an ounce of gold printer well yeah people say that it's cheaper almost to buy another printer, isn't it? Absolutely it is.

But then I did look into that. They do come with ink cartridges, brand new printers, cheaper than replacement ink cartridges, but they're half full, those ink cartridges. But still, still cheaper. And you still get a few blats on it as well. It gets to the point where I'm having to do a security clearance check on what the kids are needing to print for school you know we've got printer privileges here at work i haven't been granted them i'm not on them either now bogsy our ceo i understand

like i understand oh you know yeah you need to earn that right you can't just be printing willy-nilly right hitting us in the pocket this printer ring. And looking through a few more of the most expensive things in the world, and this will ring true to your heart, Ben, popcorn at the movies. Apparently is wildly overpriced and marked up. You even try to. For a while there, I was BYOing my own popcorn. Sneaking in the contraband. Yeah, until my wife would refuse to go to the movies with me.

She's like, you can't do that. It's embarrassing. She's like, it's not prison that. It's embarrassing. And then... She's like, it's not prison. Oh, what do I do with the shank thing? And then also,

we did talk to some movie theaters and it's not, you know, hey, they're just trying to do their best battling away. But it is wildly marked up, apparently. It is.

It's expensive. What I don't get about the movie theater, I love going to the movies, but there's no prices on that board. Like, you look up there, there is no price. Because they're ashamed.

They're ashamed of the prices they're putting on it. You're like, there's a combo this, there's a combo that. And I'm like, what does this cost? They don't tell you any of that until you go. You're like, it's a wee surprise. Oh, that's $92 for that little box of popcorn. But I just bought that. Okay, but yeah.

But as I say, I love going to the movies, but that is very expensive. Yeah, 0800 of the hits. This is what we want to check out there this morning, 4487. Overpriced items. What do you feel we're paying way too much for? We'll get your calls and texts on next. It is The Hits.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Wait for me to come home. Ed Sheeran about to play two nights at the MCG in Australia, I saw. It's just a huge huge stadium show 90,000 people I think yeah like

it's wild 80s in Sydney 85,000 yeah seat stadiums he's playing he's doing alright don't you worry

about him mate do you reckon the novelty of that wears off I mean no you reckon you'll just get used to it

is it like you know just us turning up to work you're like g'day mate yeah you probably would

wow if you're doing it every night I'm not saying he doesn't appreciate it and find it a privilege to do turning up to work and you're like, g'day mate, yeah, you probably would. Wow. If you're doing it every, I'm not saying he doesn't appreciate it and find it a privilege to do. Yeah,

I get what you're saying. You get used to, oh, this is, oh, what, only 80 tonight, you know?

But we want to know this morning what you're paying too much for. Concert tickets, I would say, right now, speaking of concerts, it's amazing to have all these concerts back

but there used to be a time back in the day you made me like 50 bucks a ticket or whatever. 20 bucks, you'd be out for four days, 900 bands. And now you're paying, you know, like it seems to be anywhere between one to two, 50, 300. You know, sometimes depending on where your seats are, who you want to see, it's just wild. So what's your message to Ed Sheeran?

Great and joy, but also concert tickets, pricing. Yeah. But hey, he's filling also concert tickets, pricing. Yeah. But hey, he's filling out stadiums, so what do I know? I'm just saying if it's one of those things, we can add to our list of things that are quite expensive these days. Yeah, there are some expensive things out there. Funerals. Yeah.

Wildly expensive. Now, the dead people, they don't care. Do they? Although we do have a friend who's planned every inch of her funeral. Yeah, she has. Even down to the eulogies that people have to read out about her. But you've got no choice for the funeral, do you? Because you have to bury the boy.

You have to pay, unless you've got a giant freezer at home, cryogenically freeze them. They're expensive. You've got to soak up that cost. Weddings? Yeah, they're wild. Wildly overpriced. As soon as you say you're having a wedding

Now my theory is If you are planning on getting married Go to a venue and just say It's a work morning tea People are just It's a wedding themed work morning tea It might look like we're getting married The morning tea will start in the evening

With some dinner But it's still a morning tea for work Just surprise them on the day With the nuptials We'll go to Nicole Welcome from the home of bacon with the pigs rum scared and Pocono. How are you?

Good thanks and yeah. Very great bacon there, isn't there? There is. Really good bacon and really good ice cream too. You're saving our bacon right now by phoning through, so thank you Nicole. What is wildly overpriced? And my one thing that gets me every

single year is just the start of a school year your stationery your school clothes a school bag you're you're paying all your extramural activities up front and then you've just come off the back of paying holiday care yeah the school you were moaning about this the other day ben i was and then they chuck a laptop into your game yeah a laptop and a donation i'm like well is it like can i not pay this or not you still haven't paid your donation well yeah it's a donation do i have the choice apparently not just put it as a fit hello don't try and say it's a donation yeah i don't know the thing is if you listen to the show for a while And you've been following His career trajectory You'll know

If he's ever offered up To do a donation He's going to opt out Of donating It's like the museum Where it's like Oh donation if you want Oh I'm okay thanks

But you know It doesn't seem like That situation It's a forceful Yeah You're a lesser Of a human being Your daughter's going to

Be put in a terrible class If you don't Donate to us Now you're very Like how much did you Pay for a uniform this year, Nicole? I'm lucky my kids don't wear uniforms, but it still doesn't mean you don't have to buy them clothes. You still need to get them good clothes to choose for the year

and a school bag and a new jumper and everything that they need because they've outgrown all the last year's stuff. So even though our school doesn't have uniforms, it's still expensive. Send them to the school in their underpants. Then they go get dressed by the lost property box. Real lottery, isn't it, what you pull out of the lost

property box? But Nicole, you go and keep safe. Overpriced school uniforms. Very fair point. Yeah. Very expensive. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. They look like they're having a wonderful week away in the South Island at the moment.

They do, yeah. They're in their Wanaka. Yeah, it looks incredible. Something else that looks incredible as well was One Republic coming to New Zealand in just a couple of weeks' time.

They're going to be in Auckland March 16th, Wellington March 18th. And we wanted to give away double passes this week, but you've got to apologise for something you did as a kid because like they say,

it's probably too late to apologise, but we want to do it anyway. So if you want to register what you did, maybe as a kid you had a wee incident that you want to apologise to your parents for. Now if you do it on the radio, we'll give you a double pass to One Direction. Would you like to apologise?

I would apologise to One Republic for calling them One Direction. No, it's too late, mate. I just did it. Yeah, tooction. Would you like to apologise? I apologise to One Republic for calling them One Direction. No, it's too late, mate. I just did it. Yeah, too late. Do you want to apologise? Because you set your school gym alight as a child during a very flamboyant Michael Jackson performance

at the talent show. Yeah, I would like to apologise for that. I'd also like to apologise to my parents. My mum, she went away for a weekend. We played cricket in the lounge. And my mate Dean swung the cricket bat and made a mark on the wall, took a little out of the wall.

And mum came home a few weeks later. She goes, did you know anything up there? And I was like, no, I've never seen that before. I knew. I knew. So I'd like to apologize for that. The cricket nerds were playing cricket in the lounge. She knew.

She's like, I know I've got a cricket nerd. Oh, gee, I've never seen that. Yeah, so that, I apologise, Jenny, that was me. Rebecca, you're on. Welcome. How are you?

I'm good, thank you. How are you? It's not too late to apologise. It's also not too late to double down on your mistake too and say you don't,

you don't feel sorry for it. But what did you do wrong? So I got dropped off at school one day from Dad. Yeah. And then I decided I didn't want to be at school that day, so I went home. And Dad then came home.

Oh, no. Now, firstly, where was your dad meant to be? Yeah, that's a good question. Where? You went to school. Was it one of those things where, like, no one say anything to anyone about this, or what happened? Well, basically, as soon as he came home, I hid in my wardrobe.

I heard him get a phone call, and that phone call was from the school. So that went down smoothly. I basically heard him telling the school, no, I dropped her off at school this morning. So, yeah, sorry. How long did you spend hidden in the cupboard? Honestly, I do not remember. It was so long ago. Did you come out of the cupboard?

Not while he was home. Oh, so he never found out? No, I don't think so. Oh, wow. This is a reveal. All right, so we're going to call your dad right now. It was many moons ago. I know, it was a long time ago,

and I'm sure he probably hardly even remembers that, but we're going to give him a call right now. It's too late to apologize. If we apologize for what you did, you'll win a double pass to One Republic. That is commitment to hiding. Okay, only person who spent more time hidden in a cupboard, bloody Harry Potter.

They kept him under the stairs, didn't they? That's impressive, Rebecca. What's your father's name, sorry? Simon. Simon! Oh, good, I'm sorry. Hey, hey, Simon. Sorry, this has been a really fumbly start. How are you, mate? Yeah, good, good.

It's John O'Bien here from the Hits radio station. Simon, we have the wonderful Rebecca on the phone. You may be familiar with her. Oh, we've met, yeah. Your daughter, yeah. Now, she's going to win a double pass to One Republic. They're coming to New Zealand in a couple of weeks, but she needs to apologize for something she's done as a kid.

Over to you, Rebecca. Hi, Dad. So there was one day that you dropped me off at school, and I decided to go home afterwards and you actually came home. So I hid in my wardrobe and so as I was hiding in my wardrobe, you actually got a phone call from the school and I clearly remember you telling the school,

no, I dropped her off at school this morning, but I was actually in my wardrobe hiding, so sorry. She's apologised. Do you accept her apology? Yeah. Now, Simon, the big question is, too, apparently

you were meant to be at work. Yeah, what were you doing? I could work from home. Oh, okay. Doing the WFH, eh? Apparently Rebecca spent the entire day hidden in the cupboard. Oh, that would be funny.

Simon and Nira, good sport. Thank you so much for letting Rebecca apologise for that. And Rebecca, you're going to One Republic. Enjoy the concert. It's going to be incredible. Thank you so much for letting Rebecca apologize for that. And Rebecca, you're going to One Republic. Enjoy the concert. It's going to be incredible. Thank you so much. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We're on The Hits, Jono and Ben. She's back on

The Hits. It's great to have her back, and it's great to have her back to tell us what we need to watch from the day show on The Hits. Megan Puppers, good morning. Hello. Nice to have you back here. Now, we did this before you went away on maternity leave, but what to watch with Megan, and since then, I haven't known what to watch. I'm here for you.

Staring at a black computer screen and a TV screen for months. Do you know, it's actually been quite hard to watch anything and sit down with two kids. Yeah, so are you still... You guys both know this. Yeah, we're kind of through the other side now. You watch what they want to watch. That's the thing.

Do you know there's a new Teletubbies? I heard that. I do. Has it started? It's kicked off already. Yeah. Is it the same as the OG? Is it better?

Worse? No, I mean, it is better, but it's still the same old costumes. It's still Tinky Winky. Let's see. Yeah. How wild. It didn't make sense on any level. The Teletubbies.

No, kids loved it. Yeah. My husband's like, do you know this is like dystopian future? Like they live underground. There's a voice box that tells them what to do. I was like, I think you're thinking too much about this. Okay. Like alien dystopian future.

Now, I must admit, I've been deep on your Instagram here, Megan. Okay. Can I just show you the photo of this beautiful casserole you made? Oh, what is that? That's like beef strong enough, but I made it with mints so that my children would eat it. Pom-poms on top.

You put potato pom-poms on top of the... Put pom-poms on top of any casserole and the kids are into it. That's a good idea. It must be like cut little portions with the pom-poms. Yeah. Hey, not just what to watch. Hey, better living, everyone. What to cook.

Welcome to the hits. Look at us. Look at us away. Who would have thought? Coming up, what melatonin's best for your sleep schedule? I was digging it.

I'm into it. I like it. All right, so what are we watching this week? All right, so this is a movie that has just come out on Netflix. We have a ghost.

I miss the nightmare. We have a ghost. I miss the nightmare. We have a ghost. Okay. No, I'm serious, Kevin. Caught him on camera. Oh, we got to show mom. No, no, no, no, no. Oh, I saw that pop up, but I haven't watched it yet.

It's the cop from Stranger Things, David Harbour. Do you know he's married to Lily Allen? Yes. We did talk to him, yeah. He's a hard case. They got married in Vegas or something, right? They did, yeah, yeah. So also got Jennifer Coolidge in it,

randomly in the best role for her. But this movie, don't look it up on Rotten Tomatoes, it doesn't have a very good rating, but I found it entertaining. It's a good one to watch and it's funny and it's not too serious. But basically this house, Anthony Mackie, who you know is the Falcon, the Avengers, him and his family move into this house that has a ghost.

And then they aren't too scared by him. David Harbour's the ghost, and they try and make money off him by doing YouTube videos and getting hits. Yeah, great. It's a cute little comedy. Don't take it too seriously, but I enjoyed it. I like it. I'm the guy with my pale skin.

I'm the ghost of the hits. Yeah, we haven't made any money off you, but it's the downside. Sometimes the Rotten Tomatoes ones, the worse the ranking, the better I love the movie. Sometimes you just want to put something on and not think too hard about it and just enjoy it. Yeah, I mean, it's not going to win any awards,

but it's still a good movie. All right, what else? One that did win awards, The Beer. This is your brother's house. I was running it fine without you. Why didn't you leave it to you then? So this is on Disney+. This has got 100% on Rotten Tomatoes,

and the main guy, the chef in this TV show, has just won a bunch of awards, just won a SAG award a day or two ago, and he is in Shameless. What's his name? Jeremy Allen. He's one of the kids from Shameless, right? Yeah. Yeah um and he is in shameless um what's his name jeremy allen he's one of the kids from shamus right yeah yeah so he is running he gets to take over um his brother's restaurant which is the scungy little joint and he is quite a fancy acclaimed chef um and it's supposed to be a comedy it's not really um i i didn't find myself laughing but it just going into the characters the

character development on the show is really good. It's always good when you go in to watch a comedy and you end up going, but the character development was exceptional. The characters were fully developed. It's like there's drug use. It's like this guy's in a dark place. Maybe it's a dark comedy, but I definitely didn't laugh. It's not the one where they're eating people away. No. No, okay. I don't know. Maybe it's a dark comedy, but I definitely didn't laugh. It's not the one where they're eating people,

wait. No. No, okay. I thought maybe. Unless I missed a really good one. No, that's it. That's where the comedy is. I think,

oh, is that the menu? Maybe that's called the menu out at the moment or something. What is that on? Oh, yeah. I feel like we need to.

Someone was talking about the other day and that was like, they go to a restaurant and it's quite, and then it's like, but the people are. They're the meals. That's the meals. Well, you're getting served up that. So that's all I day, and that was like, they go to a restaurant, and then it's like, but the people are... They're the meals.

They're the meals. Well, you're getting served up that. So that's all I know. So I was like, well, maybe this is what it is. Is that a comedy? I don't know. That's more of a horror thriller, according to the internet right now. Yeah.

So this is called The Beer, and it's really good. I would lock that in. Lock The Beer in. Yeah, there's another movie, isn't it? The Cocaine Beer. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's based on a true story in the 80s

where a beer ate some cocaine and went on a rampage. You don't want a beer on a cocaine rampage. Especially three days later when the poor beer's coming back down. He's like, oh, things aren't good, guys. It's wild stuff. I'd rather a beer that's sulking on the comedown line. Sitting there with his head lying in the fetal position. What have I done?

Never again. Hibernation for nine months. Oh, Megan, it's good to have you back. What to Watch with Megan. We'll be back again next week. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Let's go. Jono and Ben with five words for 5K.

Stop any time to keep the cash. Thank you. Or play on to win more. It is our game of word association. We play it every morning at this time on keep the cash. Thank you. Or play on to win more. It is our Game of Word Association we play every morning at this time on The Hits. You can win $5,000 when we match five words with you. Let's go to the phone, shall we? Go to the capital, Wellington City. Casey, come on in.

Hey. How are you going, Case? Yeah, not too bad. Now, this isn't, not too bad. Now, this isn't where Charles is king. This is where Cash is king. Five words. $5,000.

It's a game changer. What would you be doing to change your game? It's my quarter's birthday. How old's your daughter? She'll be 12. Well, $5,000 is a wonderful present for a 12-year-old. For their birthday. Who are you going to send into the booth this morning to do some, you know, face their fear of claustrophobia

and to match words with this morning? Jono, please. All right. Jono will head on into the soundproof booth, and when he's inside, we'll start reading out some words. He's in there now. Okay, Casey, what pops into your head when I say Snickers? Bar.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking as well. Waiheke. Island. Waiheke Island. Cakie Island. Cone. C-O-N-E. Cone. Ice cream cone?

Ice cream cone? Yeah, that's a good option. Ice cream cone. Sprained is the fourth word. Sprained. Was that sprained? Yeah, sprained. S-P-R-A-I-N-E-D.

Sprained. Sprained ankle? Yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking. And lesson is your final word. L-E-S-S-O-N. Lesson. What's a lesson? Mess lesson? Mess lesson.

Mess lesson. All right. Well, those are your five words. We'll see. We'll get Jono out of the soundproof booth right now. We'll see how we're going. Matching five words. Okay.

Casey, I don't know. I've worked up a puff. I haven't been running over to the soundproof booth for a long time haven't been in there for over a week, just that little jog really gets the heart going gets the cardio rate up, let's do this maybe you should see a doctor, but alright, but first we'll see if we can match five words with what Casey

said, here we go word one, $25 Snickers Snickers bar, yeah well done that's 25 bucks Case what do you want to do now? I'll keep going Keep going of course

Word two $50 I'm obligated to ask that question But we all know People want to push on past For once I just want Someone to go Oh yeah that's a

25's great That's a lunch Yeah Get some parking for 10 minutes Waheke Waheke Island Yeah well done That's 50 bucks Now what do Yeah, well done. That's 50 bucks.

Now, what do you want to do? That's 50. I'll keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Word three, $100. Just keep going. All right.

Love it. Cone. C-O-N-E. Cone. What way did you vote in the referendum, Casey? There's no question, Stephen. I'm going to say ice cream. Well done, well done.

So that means you've got $100. Do you want to risk it all for $500? Might as well. Might as well. Word four, $500. Keep going! Sprained. Sprained. Sprained.

I'd say sprained ankle would be the first one. Oh, Casey. $500. Casey. Casey, what are you going to do now? Oh, no. What are you going to do now? You've got $500.

I think I might take it because I'm not confident in that next one. Not confident with lesson is the next one. Are we walking away? Is it your official answer? Yeah. She's out of the game. Well, Casey, lesson was the final word. What would you have said if I said lesson?

I would have said driving lesson. Oh, Caseyy well done smart smart you've got 500 well done that's that's pretty good for you for your 12 year old's birthday party yeah thank you so much hey no worries casey well you're going to have a great day and thank you for listening and you too good on you thank you i'm forced to listen to myself it's bleak the hits the jon, the Jono and Ben podcast. First of March. Now, producer Joel, he's just returned from the office

and he spotted something. Now, where was it? Work kitchen. As with a lot of work kitchens, there's notices up around the place. You know, there's things that happen in the work kitchen. They had witty ones about cleaning your dishes. Like, TLC don't want no scrubs. But your dishes do. Yeah, that was it. And there was another one don't want no scrubs but your dishes do or something

yeah that was that and there was another one about something about there was a snoop one or something drizzle something like it's hot or i like it like it's it's like drop it in the dishwasher like it's hot or something yeah but don't drop it to break the cutlery and the plates there was some brackets down the bottom yeah but you came back and before there was a new notice that's been put up today now talk us through the notice says wh, how to be confident on camera. There's a photo of people being confident in front of a camera. And they say, learn how to be confident on camera. Now, this is what in terms of a photograph or presenting?

Presenting. Like the camera's on a tripod. It's a video camera. There's people standing in front of it. You've sent me a picture of it there. It's learn how to be confident on camera. This is an NZME. This is our radio network that we're part of. So learn how to be confident on camera. This is NZME. This is our radio network that we're part of.

So learn how to be confident on camera at the pop-up panel event with some of New Zealand's top presenters. So this is happening soon. Here we go. What date is it? I'll set it aside. 7th of March.

Census Day as well. Harry Stoll's big day. A lot going on, but you can also be confident on camera. Do I need to wear a suit on the panel? Yeah, so the panel are putting it together. Now we're part of the NZME family. So it's got Mike Padu.

Mike Padu, he's there. He's going to be one of the top presenters. Great presenter. He's great. He's very good. Jeremy Wells. Well, well, Wells. His buddy in there.

He's great. Goes without saying, yep. Matt Heath, again. Well, again, goes without saying. Another great presenter. Great presenter. Done a lot of TV over the years. Tony Street.

Oh. Yeah. And wait for it. They'll all be sharing their top tips what about my top tips well but it feels like they could have squeezed a few more into the lineup of presenters hayley sproul vaughn smith yeah well yeah they were the names i mean the name sam wallace oh yeah okay good name brie thie Thomasel. You've come... Oh, she's come with some really good names, actually. Actually, people who should be on the panel before us. But then after those people... Mind you, we haven't looked confident on camera for a number of years.

No, maybe that's our problem. We're going to try and call Tony Street, who's on that list. Tony Street here. Hello, Tony speaking. Tony Street, it's Jono and Ben. How's it going? Oh, I'm good, thanks guys. Now, be honest,

do we need to be more confident on camera? Is that why our TV show ended? Oh, yeah, that's awkward. Notice they didn't ask you guys to be part of the call? Yeah, we're just noticing that as well. We're passive-aggressively going through right now, Tony. But, hey, don't feel bad because Sam Wallace was also a little aggrieved that he wasn't asked about being confident in front of the camera.

So you're not alone. Now, is it the fact that we're lacking confidence in front of the camera or that we haven't been in front of a camera for a very long time? Probably both. Well, I don't know about that because I don't know if you've noticed, but the last year I haven't been on the old box much myself. Well, don't make us feel worse. I think I'm clinging on from the Olympics,

which was probably two years ago now. You did a great job. Thank you. Do you think maybe we should come along? Look, I tell you what, if you come along, I'll pretend that you're just a random in the crowd, and then you can come up on stage for an example, and then people will go, wow, that guy's good, maybe we should hire him.

He's confident. That's a good plan. See, I'm probably not. Even you saying that made me a little nervous. You know what? I reckon the reason they didn't ask you is because you're so busy that they think these guys have got too much on their plate, whereas the likes of Jeremy Wells and I clearly aren't busy enough.

Because Jeremy Wells, he's every night of the week and every morning. Tony, you're so lovely trying to make us feel real. You are. Very confident chat. We are. Thank you for pumping up our confidence. See why you're good at it. See why they got you for this

Come to the course Yeah we will We will definitely Put me down Have a great day Tony See ya Bye There we go

So we'll be attending the course then How do you look confident in front of the camera? You know what I reckon would be The most difficult kind of camera work ever? Like in front of the camera? Yeah pornography Yeah I would not be confident in front of that camera That yeah I would not be confident about looking at the camera but pornography pornography's all sorts of angles.

Oh, yeah. And all sorts of... I reckon what would be harder, being behind the camera in that situation as well. I don't know. Probably the wrong term. Oh, God, how did we get here? Anyway.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. The Hits, cash and card. You can win the brand new Skoda Kamek Monte Carlo worth $47,990 and thousands of dollars in the back of the car if you guess exactly how much cash we've stashed in the Skoda's boot. We actually took the Skoda. We did nothing like a round trip to Rotorua on a Tuesday to spice up your week. We had a fun time there last night.

It was fun, actually. Yeah, it was the business, a lot of business stuff. A lot of business stuff. We were business people. We were highfalutin business people. The Commerce Commission and stuff like that. And yeah, I tell you what, I can vouch. Beautiful car to sleep in, in the back.

Yeah, we slept in, yeah. I noticed you dozed off for a bit in the passenger seat. I noticed it was so comfortable. Bee Humps driving. He had a quick 10 minutes on State Highway 1 as we were going. Incredible car. Cash Keeper Alex back with us in the studio. Good morning.

Hello, how are you? Now, Cash Keeper Alex, I hate, because I know this is your last week, you venture off on your overseas journeys next week. And I'm going to get to a complaint very shortly. But first of all, there's going to be a handing over of the Cash Keeper mantle. To you, wasn't it? No, I'm going to get to a complaint very shortly. But first of all, there's going to be a handing over of the cashkeeper mantle. To you, wasn't it? No, I don't. I think it should be you.

Clearly stated. You can text us, 4487. Do you think Jono should take over as the cashkeeper? I couldn't be more unavailable for this role if I tried. I think he could be available. We can free you up, mate. You tell us what you need to get me out of it and we'll get you out of it, okay? Producer Joel, let's take a go. Don't put it on Producer Joel. Don't put it on Producer Joel. It's you, mate. You tell us what you need to get me out of it, and we'll get you out of it, okay? Producer Joel, let's take a go.

No, you put it on, Producer Joel. Don't put it on, Producer Joel. It's you, mate. The last option. You know you couldn't find a shaky up your hands to keep the cash. That's got to be great, though. The listeners will be trying to break you down. Don't bully me into keeping cash.

Anyway, but there's a complaint. You know you like the limelight, though, don't you? So you're always doing it. But I don't like the commitment. There's a complaint about you. And it says, Alex, please stop pausing before telling people they've guessed wrong.

It's cruel. Brad and Laura did hit me up about this one last night too. I think that's the fun of it, isn't it? It's the old Dominic Bowden. Well, you don't want to go, no. Straight away. Next one. Bit of drama. Yeah, bit of showbiz. isn't it? It's the old Dominic Bowden. Well you don't want to go, no, straight away. Next one, goodbye.

Bit of drama. Yeah, bit of showbiz. Producer Joel, do you think you'll keep that pause alive? So what would you do

with the money? I'll be asking all those ones. I'll be making it hard. Yeah. I'll be making it hard. Tina, we'll get you on

from Rotorua. How are you? I'm good, thank you. Hey, we're there last night. We were just banging on about it before.

I had a wonderful two hours there. It was a magnificent place. Oh, that's good. What do you do, Tina? I'm going to guess $20,000. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa, you know Tina.

Tina's like, all business. All right, we'll hand you over to Cash Give Alex. Here we go. Before we do, what's an appropriate amount of pause time that you'd like Alex to wait before telling you if you're correct or not? Tina? One second.

One second. One second. Okay. Okay. Tina, what is your guess? Can I guess now? Oh, okay. $20,155.05.

Was that $20,155.05? Yeah. Okay, I'm going to read that out dramatically now. Tina from Rotorua with a guess of $20,155.05. I'm going to spice it up, and instead of saying it's incorrect, I'm going to say the figure is higher. Okay. Higher than what Tina's guessed.

Higher than what Tina has guessed. That is incorrect, and it is higher. Thank you. What do you want to say, Tina? What do you really want to say? I'm going to say that's good news because then I can try again. That's a good positive attitude there so we're going into higher and lower now

I like that it's freaky though because I'm bad at reading the numbers out anyway, you can see I've got this little notepad in front of me it's so confusing to figure out in my mind whether it's higher or lower you've done a great job and I couldn't be trusted

with that job you know me a great job, and I couldn't be trusted with that job. You know me and numbers, Ben, no good. But yes, thank you, Tina. Another chance to play 11 o'clock this morning. When Jono's back with... I'm trying to make this a thing. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, you would have heard a lot of talk about ChatGPT

recently, which is new artificial intelligence. It's like a computer program. You type in something and it will spit out within seconds just the answers to your questions. Universities are quite worried about it because you can type in a topic and it can spit you out a university essay pretty quickly. Oh, if you went postmodern architecture, write me a 500-word essay

with a couple of spelling and punctuation mistakes so it looks like it's written by you, it'll do it perfectly and no professors or people who are checking the tests at universities can tell the difference now. I did talk to someone over the weekend who works at the university and they were saying one of the things it doesn't do yet is acknowledge the references where it got the things from, which you need to do in a lot of university papers, go such and such said this in this article or basically list all your references. So it hasn't quite nailed that.

It's just sort of put stuff together and hoped it's nearly correct. So it's basically designed to understand and generate human-like text. So you type something in, you type a few instructional words, and it will just follow and write something out. And it is insane to think, if this is just the beginning of this technology, what it's going to be doing in 10 years. I know. Like radio, we won't be required.

Well, that's what we wanted to test right now, because I think humour hasn't quite nailed humour yet. Mind you, we haven't done that either. So it's not just a chat gpt thing yeah we'll be going for a lot longer than a couple of months yeah but i i'm gonna type in right now um so what should i write write write a radio voice break which is what we're doing right now conversation on the radio so write a radio voice break for jono and ben on the hits with funny jokes around jono's bald head from Ben oh here we go

we'll see we'll see I mean let's see I mean I like making jokes around it but yeah well there's been the basis of our career yeah this is my if I wasn't bald do you think we'd still be going today probably not okay so I've just spent that what's come out okay so you've got lines and I've got lines and it's a voice break's come out. Okay. So you've got lines, and I've got lines, and it's a voice crack from chat GPT. Okay, you start reading it. I'll read my bits. You read yours.

Hey there, New Zealand. You're listening to Jono and Ben on the hits, and we're ready to brighten up your day with some laughter. You don't always want to... I guess you don't want to announce that you're going to do jokes, but hey, you've done it, so that's fine. That's right, Jono. I'm not going off script. Okay. That's right, Jono. I'm not going off script. Okay.

That's right, Jono. And speaking of brightening up, have you considered getting a hair transplant to cover that beautiful bald head of yours? Very funny, Ben, but I like to think of it as a solar panel for a sex machine. I think it's going to cancel. It's going to make us lose our job. Let's do it full on. Anyway, I'm laughing, according to this. Laughs's going to make us lose our job. Let's do it full on. Anyway, I'm laughing according to this.

Laughs in brackets. You know what they say. Bald men are wise because they have to think harder to keep their heads warm. It's actually quite good stuff. Well, I definitely have to do that during the winter months. That's a great idea, Jono. You could rent out ad space on your head and make some extra cash. Am I just being bullied by

artificial intelligence? I think so. The in-chat GPT has redeemed itself at the end, pulled it back, so we've had a bit of fun about your head, but the last line... Well, one of us has had fun. Your bald head is a national treasure, Jono, it says here. Speaking of national treasures, stay

tuned because we've got more laughs and entertainment coming up on the hits. All's well that ends well from chapter 19. treasures, stay tuned because we've got more laughs and entertainment coming up on the hits. All's well that ends well from ChatGPT. No, no. What do you mean, and speaking of national treasures? I don't know. I don't know what that means. There's no Segway connection there whatsoever.

Artificial intelligence has tried to make itself feel better because it feels guilty for bullying me. Am I going off script if I start crying now? Yeah, it hasn't been scripted in there, but hey, ChatGPT, nailed it. It's pretty good. Actually, we might put some questions

from ChatGPT to the Prime Minister and see how that goes. It is the hits. You've got Jono and Ben. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. Courtney Cox from Friends, who got a star out of the Hollywood fame,

the Hollywood Walk of Fame yesterday, so congratulations to her. That was pretty awesome. Coxie. I saw Jennifer Anderson was there with her daughter, with Courtney Cox's daughter, who I think is her goddaughter. Oh, that's nice. So they are friends in real life as friends in the TV show.

Isn't that cool? I think they were just trying to ignore the old Chandler, aren't they? Oh, boy, yeah. Poor Chandler. I feel sorry for himler I feel sorry for him I feel sorry for him on that reunion yeah

he's obviously been battling through no one ever calls me I know someone texts bloody Chandler yeah that was really sad now my wife Amanda

has got a little a little hook that she carries in her in her handbag and it's basically she gets out of her handbag puts it on any table and then she can hang her handbag from the table this handbag and it's basically she gets out of a handbag puts it on any table and then she can

hang her handbag from the table this handbag that was a gift that was for a significant birthday and the handbag she cares about that thing more than me she's not hanging you on a hook no no keeping you off the ground i'm allowed to touch the ground this handbag's not allowed to touch the ground it's permanently playing can't touch the ground. Yeah. But everyone that sees this little hook, it wasn't a very expensive thing. It was just a little, you know, the hook was very cheap.

Great invention too. I know. And everyone's like, oh my God, that's amazing. Where'd you get that? And she's like, this is probably the best thing I own. Better than the handbag is the little hook. More people talk about the hook than the handbag. I wouldn't mind that hook.

Actually just hook it onto a little table. I put my car keys on there. Yeah. Take it around everywhere. It's hook stuff. What do you want to hook on? You can put something there. So the hook's got her hook, line, and sinker.

Yeah, she loves it. And actually, it's pretty cool. Pretty cool little invention. I haven't seen too many people have it. And she was like, well, this is potentially the best thing that I own. The coolest thing. So we wanted to know this morning on 0800 HITS, what's the best thing you own?

That we maybe Maybe that we need In our lives I would say I've spoken about it Before many years ago Purchased a carpet cleaner Oh yeah Carpet cleaning machine

Only because I got Inside my head I needed to go Get a rug doctor And as I got The rug doctor I was like I'm pretty sure

That's a couple of Chunks of carrot In the brushes there Of the rug doctor Right So I was like pretty sure that's a couple of chunks of carrot in the brushes there of the rug doctor right so i was like imagine how many carpets like joel's flat and things it's like i'll go i'll invest in this thing it is wonderful so how often would you give your house a good rug doctoring once a year once a year yeah yeah i could come over to your house and do it that's the problem though when people know you've got a carpet cleaner come over to your house and do it. That's the problem, though. When people know you've got a carpet cleaner, they're like, hey, mate, come over and clean. Like, you quickly turn from carpet cleaner owner

just into carpet cleaner employee. But no money. Exchange of hands. You just go around cleaning people's carpet. But I can do your couches too. I'm going to do your upholstery here. It's got a little attachment. Mate, I can let you name a thing.

That hook. I could clean that hook up with my carpet. I could probably clean the bag. Very versatile cleaning machines. I would say that's the best thing I own. Oh, yeah. I wouldn't have known that anyone would own that. So that's pretty cool.

What would be? One of your little Funko Pop toys? Yeah, well, yeah, I do like my Funko Pop toys. I do like my LeBron James basketball one, my Dwayne Johnson one, my wife's. What's your favorite of all of them? You've got a lot of them. I do like the. Whenever we're in the mall and we walk past EB Games or something, I or something i'm like oh i can see him getting drawn in there i do like

those little funko pop i don't have many of them but i could see that thing if i let it go i could i could get many of them but your lebron james is your yeah it's probably my favorite one that's okay so if there's a fire what are you getting first are you getting your lebron james funko pop or any family members because you know the hooks the hooks got top priority getting chosen before i am isn't it i'll come back to you on that one uh but oh andrew that's is the phone number four four eight seven on the text what is the best thing at your own we've got some magic mike uh passes to go see magic mike in the in the movies right now uh what would what would you say the best thing you own? Love to hear from you next. I'd love to get

Magic Mike a shirt to own. He doesn't own one, does he? No, he doesn't own one. That's next on The Hits. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Keep your calls and texts

coming through for the best thing that you own. We'll get to those in a moment because the Prime Minister though right now has phoned through.

Just phoned through a bit earlier than we were expecting. Prime Minister Chris Hipkins, good morning. Good morning. To the important issues of the day, how's the golf cart? Well, the golf cart's safely back where it belongs.

Our legs are functioning again after sitting down for 53 hours. And we're still waiting for our Microsoft Clipart certificate from you too, Prime Minister. I must remember, I must remember. Not that you have other stuff to deal with there right now. Have you got used to being referred to as Prime Minister? It still takes a bit of getting used to. I'm kind of getting there, but yeah, it does take a bit of getting used to. Have you got your tickets for the lotto draw or are they not out yet, the big lotto draw?

Which is a great idea. As we were last week trying to raise money for those affected by the cyclone, this seems like a really great initiative. Yeah, I'll definitely be buying a ticket as soon as they're out. $95 million or something it raised for the earthquakes last time they did one. Yeah, so that's not just a lot to draw, but also just the donations that came in internationally and so on. We're dealing with a slightly different event to a major earthquake,

but I'm still hopeful that we can get a good amount of money in the kitty to support some of those community initiatives that will need that support following what we've seen over the last couple of weeks. And still thousands of people being affected at the moment. And I know I came in hard last time with a crime question, but I see there was a meeting last night with the residents of Esk Valley about the crime that's taking place. Yeah, I haven't had feedback about how that meeting went, but I'm hoping that once they have the opportunity

to meet with the Minister of Police and with the local police area commander, hopefully some of their concerns will have been elated. But we have got extra police on the ground in that area so that anything that does happen, the police are there and they can deal with it. I was going to say, how much stuff do you have to read a day? Are you handed documents that are huge? A huge amount of pages you have to read a day? Like, are you handed, like, documents that are huge?

A huge amount of pages you have to read through and be on top of? Yeah, there's a lot of reading, actually, every day. Thankfully, I've got an amazing team of people who also read it with me, and so they sometimes give me nice little summaries of it, which is also very helpful. Do that at bedtime. Okay, just read the important international trade documents, because we saw you were at a university yesterday, Prime Minister,

and a lot of selfies. Has the selfie game really upped its level in the last four weeks? Oh, hugely. I mean, the thing is, everybody naturally wants to have a photo with a ginger anyway. But, you know, clearly that's gone up a notch. Now, Prime Minister, I don't know if you've heard about ChatGPT, which is the new artificial intelligence

you maybe haven't been passed on a document on that but it's a website you can basically, universities are worried because it can spit out a university essay in a matter of seconds. It's quite impressive We just did a whole radio break thanks to ChatGPT and it was all just bald

jibes that Ben was making towards me I came up with jokes on Jono, but we put in some fun questions to ask Prime Minister Chris Hipkins, so we might throw a couple of these at you and see how you think. The artificial intelligence went, all right? Okay, all right. This sounds scary, but we'll have it go. We also typed in hard-hitting questions as well.

They'll be coming up. Yeah, well, the hard-hitting ones were actually quite good as well. We'll go to the lighter one. Okay, if you could switch jobs with anyone in the world for a day, who would it be and why? Oh, goodness me. Joe Biden, I reckon. I'd love to be President of the United States.

That sounds like such a cool gig. President Hipkins. Yeah. It has a ring to it. Okay, you're at a dinner party. Who's there and why? Three people. I don't know, actually.

I love having dinner with my family. It doesn't happen all that often these days. My ambitions aren't that much greater than that. I just want to see my family. You can put your family in there. That's a lovely answer. Okay, have you been starstruck by anyone you've met? Oh, good question.

How are you doing now? You all right? Well, yeah, well, you know, such a distinguished company that we have on the radio. I'm still coming to terms with it. You're playing it pretty cool. I like it. Actually, I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what.

The first really famous person that I ever met was when I was a kid and I met Sir Edmund Hillary. I have to say I was a bit starstruck by him. But actually, he was such a lovely down-to-earth guy that it didn't last for very long because he just made everyone feel so relaxed. Imagine he had to rip your arm off when you were shaking your hand, Sir Edmund Hillary. He'd have a

solid handshake. Here's another one from ChatGPT for you, Prime Minister. Your favourite quote or saying that motivates you? My favourite quote? I've got a few of them, actually. There's a fantastic fantastic quote but it's way too long to read out on the radio from Theodore Roosevelt former President of the United States

where he talked about not basically paying too much attention to your critics That's quite a long quote but it's definitely one that I like Like your people read and summarise for you You just summarise for us Let's go one more If you could only eat one

food or drink for the rest of your life, what would it be? Oh, sausage rolls. You are a fan of sausage rolls. Is it Coke Zero or Diet Coke as well? Yeah, Coke Zero. I have to tell you though, everywhere I go now, I'm getting given sausage rolls and Coke Zero.

The Prime Minister's coming. Get some Coke Zero and sausage rolls. They'll love it. Hi, Chris Hopkins. Thank you very much for your time this morning. You go and have a great day. What's next on your agenda? Heading up to Napier today, back into the bay just to talk to some orchardists and see how they're getting on up there. Oh, good on you.

Good on you. Thank you for your time. OK, thank you, guys. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We're talking about the best thing you own and Nathan's with us. Good morning. Hello. We're talking about the best thing you own, and Nathan's with us. Good morning. Hello. Nathan, welcome. The best thing you own.

Yeah, it's my wedding ring. Oh, melting hearts. This guy. What's so great about it? Well, it's square. Oh, square. Unorthodox. Yeah, because I used to ride horses, I've got big knuckles,

so I needed a ring to get over my big knuckles but not look awkward. So it's a square one. Yeah. And it's bloody awesome. So is it square like on just the inside or the outside or both? It's square all like. Yeah, like some sort of washer sort of situation. Yeah.

That's quite cool. I've never seen that before. You sort of turn it sideways to go over the big knuckle and then it sits real nice on your finger. Jesus, how big are your knuckles there? Got some big knuckles there, Nato. Oh, you know. Riding horses is hard work.

I've only ridden one horse. Have you ever ridden a horse, Ben? A couple of times, yeah. I just had a horse for a wee bit back in the day, yeah. Oh, because Ben grew up on a farm? Yeah, for a couple of years in the day yeah oh because you will be grew up on a farm yeah for a couple of years yeah farming wasn't for me it wasn't my wasn't my thing yeah i know you look at me right now john oh you're like that guy he'd be great out there but no sorry to shock you wasn't my sort of my happy place hey good on you nathan you and your big

knuckles going to have a great day no worries worries. Thank you. See you, mate. Ludwig. Ludwig, welcome from Lower Hart. Hello. How are you? Yeah, good. Okay. What is the most important thing you own? The key to my fiancé's heart. Oh, jeez.

What? Two from two. We're like counting hearts today, aren't we? The lads are doing it. Bullseye. Oh, that's good. I hope your partner's listening. What's your partner's name?

Katie. Katie. Because Katie wouldn't have heard this. And like this is, you've just come on the public platform. Can we call Katie? Yes, you can. Okay, we've just got Katie's number here. We're going to call your partner, Katie.

Oh, cool. Too good to pass up. I mean mean this is hello Katie speaking Katie it's Jono and Ben from the hits here hello

we come bearing wonderful news yeah great news is it yeah well yeah we've got Ludwig we've got Ludwig

on the phone hello darling hello my love oh you guys we were just talking about what the best thing that you own We've got Ludwig on the phone. Hello, darling. Hello, my love. You guys, we were just talking about the best thing that you own, and I was like, my wife's thing is a hook for a handbag, and that's where we started. And I was like, oh, I've got a carpet cleaning machine. And then Ludwig phones up.

The best thing that he owns. Have a listen to what he said. The key to my fiance's heart. Key to's heart. Key to your heart. Isn't that lovely? That's amazing. You're lucky you've snapped him up,

because otherwise I'd be chasing Ludwig down. Put him behind, put him behind. What a catch. What a catch. You guys are going to have a great day. I will go and send you along to Magic Mike to go see the new movie in cinemas. Sounds like you've already got a Magic Mike in your life, but have a great day.

I will. Cheers, John Irvine. See you, mate.