Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: Ben's Blaming His Dodgy Ad Pop-Ups On Producer Juliet!

Episode Date: January 25, 2022

As well as this, we delved into what else is making Ben nervous at the moment, Jono's son can't seem to grasp the concept of personal space, and finally we caught up with epidemiologist Dr Michael Baker to talk more about these new mask mandates! GAH will this ever end! Enjoy the show.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits with the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome back, it's Jono and Ben here, the 26th of January. The podcast is back with a really adorable dog, a puppy, wandering around the office. A German Shepherd puppy. Yeah, it was very cute. I've never imagined a German Shepherd as a puppy. Whenever I picture a German Shepherd, it's full German, it's full Shepherd. Yeah, it gets away.

I think that was the first time I've ever seen a German Shepherd. Very cute, hey, very cute. Adorable. Just a few months old, apparently. Yeah. Very cute. Is that a few months old? It's already a massive puppy.

No, it's bigger than a lot of other dogs, eh? It's going to turn into a racehorse. Yeah. German Shepherd, what is your favourite type of dog? Now, Bo, obviously, Bo is a... Samoyed. Samoyed. Yeah.

Well, I do really like the Mountain Dog. Yeah, they're sort of the ones that are sort of in the snow and stuff overseas. They can be. Is that why they have white fur? So they blend in? I guess so. And they're kind of, you know, back in the day, they would have pulled sleds and things like that.

I mean, always, like, we got the dog because we did like that brand of dog. Yeah. But I like Border Collies. Good. Yeah. Great personality, these Border Collies. We did some that brand of dog. But I like Border Collies. Good. Yeah. Great personality, these Border Collies. We did some filming with the dog show. We did a dog show.

And the Border Collies are so smart. Yeah. They are. They're already judging you. You can tell they're judging us. None of these guys. They're just a lame joke. What about the ones at the airport that sniff out all your drugs when you come through with me?

Like the beagles. Yeah, you're probably not a big fan of those, when you come through with me? Like the beagles. You're probably not a big fan of those, are you? Not a huge fan of a beagle. I've caught them a few court cases over the years. We had my mum staying during the holidays, and she's got a little dog. And my dog and the little dog would get on really well. But what was really frustrating me is they'd be playing,

like play fighting. Play fighting in the lounge. Guys, take it outside. So they've been playing over 10 minutes if i have enough and put them outside and then they just sit by the door and look both of them sit by the door stop fighting stop playing and just look with the door you're like okay outside your fighting area yeah i was like go nuts outside do what you need to do and then they let them back inside and again they start play fighting like guys take it outside maybe that's where they thought their ufc arena was yeah in between your couches yeah and i was like yeah it was really like come on you've got a whole you've got the backyard just

go nuts what's the coolest trick you've taught your dog ben boys uh i don't really i don't really like he's he's very good when he's when he wants something when he's focused he's what food he's like oh man i'll sit i'll lie down'll shake. What do you want me to do? Or do your tax returns. Yeah, but then when we're out and about and there's things going on, it's kind of like you. There's a lot going on. He's very distracted. Because he came over last week to the house and to my house with you

and we were cooking a barbecue. Jesus, I fed him a lot of meat. He loved it. He loved it. We were doing a prop barbecue for a sketch. He ate 12 pack of sizzlers, four sirloin steaks. Even the vegetarian sausages. Everything was fair game. And I couldn't see an end.

No. Is there an end to, does he get full? Lettuce, lettuce. I found that recently lettuce is where he draws the line. But like, yeah, like if you drop something on the floor, he's very quick in there. And the other day I accidentally dropped some lettuce i was like oh this would be interesting and he was like not for me did he inspect it yeah he had a crack he sort of listened up and

went to that and it kind of bit nah not much in it for me but that's the lettuce is the you know yeah yeah so even lettuce for human what is lettuce it's kind of a bit what is the flavor of lettuce no you add sort of stuff to it don't you actually we talk about that on the podcast today very unusual thing that's uh that you add sort of stuff to it, don't you? Actually, we talked about that on the podcast today. Very unusual thing that you add to salads that's not available in stores at the moment because of the pandemic,

I guess. Can't get stock in. Yeah, but what was I going to say? The flavour of lettuce, what would you describe that as? Almost nothing. Nothing?

Yeah. It's like water. Is water a flavour? It's kind of water, a little bit watery. It's the water of the food world, isn't it, lettuce? It can get a little bit crunchy sometimes, but not all, you know, yeah. It's a kind Is water a flavour? It's kind of A little bit watery It's the water of the food world You kind of get a little bit Crunchy sometimes

But not all You know It's a kind of It's a bit bland Nothing to it Much like Ben and myself The lettuce The Jono and Ben

Of the food world What is it? The dog's not going to say Not for me Enjoy the podcast The show where the masks Make them look A whole lot better

Can't say this Bad enough on the face It makes you beautiful Jono and Ben podcast. We're going to get to the bottom of the new mask mandate that seems to be coming into effect next week and find out exactly what you can and can't be wearing on your face. It's a moving goalpost. Every day there's a different thing We're probably meant to be wearing masks now Over the rest of the broadcast No I think we're okay in our bubble right now But as soon as you step outside this studio mate

You better have a mask on your face As far as I understand I drive around Looking at everyone in masks Going it's a great time to be a robber Isn't it I see what you're saying

because you know any other time when there's non-mask wearing you know take us back to 2019 a happier place yeah

wandering around we're all in a mask if you see someone in a mask you go oh he's up to he's about to rob a petrol station right but now

everyone's doing it yeah you know you're right it's ideal so yeah good stuff got to think of the positives so yeah more armed robberies and now speaking of Everyone's doing it, yeah. Yeah. You know, you're right. It's ideal. So, yeah, good stuff. Got to think of the positives, don't you?

More armed robberies. And now, speaking of, you know, laws and things being enforced on the public, Ben Boyce, I've been talking to my good friend Brian Tarmack in prison, and he wanted me to get this out there. You're driving around the highways and things over summer, some of the state highways and stuff, surely we can do better with speed cameras than just some random brand new van parked on the side of a state highway.

Because it's just like, well, there's the speed camera. You know, if you're driving up, you're like, why is there a brand new red Hyundai I-Pace just sitting in the middle of the whole heck of planes with no one in it right i'm gonna slow down gotcha yeah but sometimes they don't you don't always get that that warning to it i guess they try and put it in a spot sometimes that you know you're like oh you know yeah it's always been my dream to uh there's one down the road from my house it's always in a van to dream just a sneaker tarpaulin over the back window You know, hanging over like a curtain

People would appreciate it They'd be like, some battler, some Kiwi legend has taken this into his own hands I don't know if the police would appreciate that I like the good old days of speed cameras, you know when every town in New Zealand just had one and it was on a post

it was a big white post with a big white box. Everyone knew where it was. It was like a Formula One race through every other street in town, apart from this little 150-meter stretch. You're right. It was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, speak camera. Yeah, pump on the brakes. And then back they'd go afterwards.

It's true. There was one down at Rimuera Road That you know You drive past Everyone knew This is where you slow down This is the safest place For any pedestrian Or any other motorist

In town It's good though From a health and safety perspective They're mixing it up now They're putting it in places So they keep you on your toes You know what keeps me on my toes The bloody

T3 and your bus lane cameras Oh Those are They are not forgiving. No, they are not. They are really not forgiving. No. You've got to be careful.

You spend five seconds in a bus lane, boom, you've got a $900 fine. And we know about it because all your letters get sent to work. They all arrive here. Hey, something else that's annoying, John, I mean, many New Zealanders over summer, is the fly situation. Every year I feel like, I say it, the flies have got situation. Every year I feel like I say it. The flies have got worse. Yeah, I feel like they've got worse.

Well, last night they were just all over me. You know when you're watching news grab from Australia and there's someone in a cork hat and there's just flies all over their face? That was my house last night. We've got Rude the Bugman next to tell us, are the flies getting worse and what is something we all can do to stop the flies from hanging around at the house? We'll find out in just a few moments

on the hats Jono and Ben the hits now flies they seem to every summer they're annoying me and my household

you don't like even opening your doors you keep your family sort of in a kidnap situation over summer don't you no windows are allowed

open no doors are allowed open yeah they're like people coming on to knock on their door you know people annoying people that see you open the gate or the thing coming on to knock on your door you know people annoying people that see you open the gate

or open the thing they come up knock on your door they want to sell you something well I feel the same way about flies oh those annoying people I think they're called

charities Ben not always charity but you're right sometimes they are geez they look like a horrible person but yes they are annoying I agree

we're joined now by Rude the Bugman good morning a very good morning you need to host your own breakfast show called A Rude the Bugman. Good morning. A very good morning. You need to host your own breakfast show called A Rude Awakening. Oh, bullshit. Rude Awakening.

It would almost be worth giving Rude a show on the hits for that. Oh, yeah, we could. Actually, yeah, especially with really dumb mythical questions. Rude. Yeah, what? Is it just me

or are there a lot of flies around see there you go that's exactly what i would i would never open with that line never and the reason is i'd like to see your scientific data that makes you believe that there are more flies than there were for instance last year well my dad is my just my eyes of course summertime but yeah obviously there seems to be more flies would you say in the summer seasons than they were, for instance, last year. Well, my dad is more, just my eyes. Maybe it's just, of course, summertime. But yeah, obviously, there seems to be more flies, would you say, in the summer seasons than in winter? That's correct.

Is that a bit of a question? No. Oh, this is going to be awkward. It's going to be really awkward. Oh, have we made it awkward? I love it. I loved it. I loved it.

All right. Now, listen. You are, you, you two, at least the last time I looked, you guys are warm-blooded. Yes. I've got a cold heart, but warm blood. You got it. So you breathe oxygen to burn and to keep your body warm. Insects don't have that wonderful stuff.

They just adapt to the heat of their environment. So if it's warmer, and usually you can safely say in summer it's quite a bit warmer than winter. In summer, they have got a lot more temperature and therefore they have a lot more energy. They can find each other. They can fly quicker. They can mate quicker. They can reproduce quicker. They have larger offspring numbers.

So yes, it goes up for insects in summertime. What's your thoughts on getting a house sprayed for bugs, Rude? Absolutely not. Gotcha. Because I didn't do that last week, just so you know. What is the benefit? Because obviously we know, we understand that every insect, there's a purpose. For a fly, for example, in summertime, what is their purpose

other than coming inside and hanging around our food? Okay, so we have 1,200 different species of flies in New Zealand, guys. Which one are you wanting to know the details about? Oh, now here we go. No, no, honestly, if you're talking about house flies, the normal house flies that you find everywhere, these are guys that actually, as larvae, as maggots, they do a bloody good job in recycling lawn clippings and organic material and compost. So that's their job. Their job is to compost things. The reason they are hanging around people is that when it comes to mating, they do need a little bit of material to get their goalies into action.

So does Ben. It's prescribed. So what they really like is sweaty palm prints, especially of kids in schools in the summertime, on walls and places and surfaces and they get the acetic acid and that's what they need to get into the making system.

So, yeah, that's why they come into houses, really, to find us, to find our sweaty palm prints. Really? So it's not food. It's not food that's attracting them as such.

No, that's blowflies. They want to... Ah, that's blowflies. That's to, ah, that's blowflies. That's blowflies, Ben. Oh, mate, mate. So is there anything we can do that is a way that you would approve of getting the flyers to stay out of the house? Is there anything in particular?

Yes, absolutely. Flies are rather poor flyers, by the way. They don't like big winds. They quite often, when it's windy, sit on the windless side of the house. When people open their windows when it's hot in the summertime, they usually do it not on the windy side, but on the lowered side, which is dumb because the flies come straight in. Ah.

So you always open your windows on the windy side of the house. That's a good tip because there won't be round there. Exactly. No chemicals, no mucking around. So there we go. We've figured out that there's not more flies than usual this year. You just have a lack of hedges. Lack of hedges.

Grow more hedges, grow more hair. Yeah. And I'll get rid of the flies. That's very interesting, Rude. Thank you very much. I've learned a lot. Yeah. That's very interesting, Rude. Thank you very much. I've learned a lot. Yeah. This is the point, isn't it?

When you look at nature, you actually have the answers right in front of you. Lovely, eh? He gets straight to the bottom of the news. And the news says, can you get straight out of my bottom? It's Benjamin Boyce. What's happening with scrolling, mate? Well, a lot of talk yesterday about masks. Jacinda Ardern, the Prime Minister, had a big announcement.

A bit of a mask mandate that comes into effect February 3rd. She announced it in a traditional, you know, press conference style. Today, Cabinet has agreed to enhance the mask-wearing protocols in the red setting of the COVID-19 protection framework to further assist in the slowdown of Omicron. Not that exciting. She sounds sad. Yeah, and I'm sure it's not the news that she wants to be telling everyone.

She probably wants to get up there and go, I give up. I'm done. I'm done. Sort yourself out, guys. Me and Clark, we're going to take a rapid antigen test and we're going to go live in the Bahamas. So goodbye forever. Yeah. So we forever. Yeah.

So we thought we'd make it sound a little bit more exciting. Masks. The vast masks have to be worn and they need to be proper masks, but we wanted to make it a little bit more exciting, the announcement. Are you sick and tired of having 100% of your face exposed? Well, have we got the solution for you. Masks must now be worn at food and drink businesses, close proximity businesses, events and gatherings.

Face masks are ideal for keeping out pesky viruses, smelling your own coffee breath, hiding cold sores and looking like a surgeon. All of the greatest people in the world have worn masks. Darth Vader, Catwoman and the dude from Phantom of the Opera. So why don't you join them? There we go. A bit more exciting.

It was good, yeah. These are great reasons to wear a mask as well as protecting you from Omicron. So all of the masks that I have been wearing, like I have so many masks. I have more masks than I have underpants now. Are they redundant? Like now do I have to turn those masks into underpants? I can't use them on my face. We're going to talk to Dr. Michael Baker about this

after 7.30 this morning. So face coverings can't be now. What I know, they can't be scarves, bandana, T-shirts, and things pulled up over your face. They have to be masks. Ashley Bloomfield in the press conference yesterday said they needed to be either medical masks or sort of three-layer masks.

So I guess it depends. I'm thinking, this is my guess, on how many layers your cotton mask, if you have been wearing a cotton mask, has. Well, that would sort of, you know, once they did say you had to wear a three-layer mask, that is what would lead you to believe. Or some cotton masks claim to be three-layered.

And others, but not all cotton masks are the same. So I guess if you're in doubt, maybe a medical mask or this N95 that everyone's talking about, which you say makes you look like a duck. Yeah, it does. Duck me. Whenever you see anyone with an N95, you're like, ooh. It's like seeing a pair of Jordans.

You've got Jordans for your face. Oh, you're running N95, I see. Quite the mask. Yeah, no, what I do find, though, Is in an already confusing situation Is to confuse people more And then you So if you want to go to a restaurant You've got to wear it in to your table You're allowed to take your mask off

When you eat and drink But then if you go to the bathroom Put that mask back on Because that's when COVID gets you It gives you time out When you're at the table So if you're I need to enjoy your meal

If you're waiting for your food And you're just sitting at the table Chatting to the people That you're at dinner with Do you have to wear sitting at the table chatting to the people that you're at dinner with, do you have to wear a mask? You're like the reporters in the press. You're trying to trip me up here. Listen, we'll get Michael Baker to answer all of these questions after.

These are all great valid questions. I think we all have them. So if you've got any, text us through 4487. We'll ask Dr. Michael Baker very shortly. There was some wonderful people who did alternative ones when these first came out. There was a guy or a lady wearing a G-string on his face. Oh, wow. He kind of looked like Bane from Batman with a strange fetish.

But yeah, Michael Baker with us after 7 o'clock to answer all the questions. It is the hits. You've got John, I'm Ben. What sort of rays are the plugs emitting? I'm nervous. Now I take photos of the handbrake on in my car. Don't even get me started on whether I left the iron on or not. I turn my phone off at night.

I just don't know what it's doing. It makes me nervous. Yeah, but what if we run out of hand sanitizer? I'm nervous. So nervous. I love this part of the show. This is what makes Ben nervous. Ben is the show resident.

We call him our central nervous system. He's nervous about everything. A lot of anxiety rolling around in that little head of his. He's more nervous than Pete Davidson when Kanye comes over to pick up the kids. Yeah, literally. Hiding in the spare room under the bed. What's making you nervous today? This morning,

I want to talk about my dog, Bo. Now, I've talked many times about Bo. I love my dog, Bo. Great. He's great. He really is great. He's a big, white, fluffy Samoyed.

We talk a lot about him on the radio. He's really lovable, but he is a bit of a doofus. Kind of like you, Jono. Lovable and a doofus. Yeah. But I love... He's adorable, isn't he?

You can't... You could never be mad at Bo. Have you ever been mad at him doofus. Yeah, but he's adorable, isn't he? You could never be mad at Beau. Have you ever been mad at him? He's been mad, but then he sort of puts his head down and you're like, oh, I can't stay mad at you, mate. That's so sad. You brought shame upon this family. Makes me a bit nervous in social settings. That's the thing that's

making me nervous today. In the past, we've talked about how he's taken underwear off a clothesline from a neighbour's house to the friends. He's eaten an entire platter of food at another function he's peed on a picnic blanket an outdoor movie he's done these sort of things at social functions which makes me a little bit nervous when i turn up with my dog don't normally do that but the other day we came to your place yeah you did yeah but uh you know my daughter poppy was his dog obsessed wants a dog and i refused to buy her one. So I was like, well, Ben, boy, she could bring over your dog.

Yeah, you're like, bring the dog over. And I'm like, you sure? And you're like, nah, bring him over. And it was all good. We were sitting outside. We were just having a catch-up before work, weren't we? Having a beer in the sun, sitting around on the prior mansion deck. Yeah.

The estate, I like to call it. The rolling estate. Yeah. All right. And the dog, Beau, was sort of wandering around the backyard. And we were all sort of sitting facing towards the dog. And I'm like, you know, you just see the dog walking around. And I'm sitting there going, just nervously watching, going, oh, what's he going to get into?

Is he going to start eating something? Is he going to start, you know? Just a bit worried about him because I know we were all looking out that way. We were all looking out to the rolling plains and the hills and the lake. And the street is on for kilometres. So Bo is far, far in the distance. We can make him out. He's with the help.

They're looking after him. But then we all noticed, and I think no one said anything, but we all noticed Bo sort of circled around a couple of times in sort of one area. It's in a familiar circle, isn't it? He's settling in. And sort of started squatting down and on my head I'm like, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh. It's that familiar hunched-over dog maneuver.

It's a yoga maneuver, the hunched-over dog. Down with dog. And then he did his business on your lawn, which is what dogs do, and I understand that. And it's expensive grass, too. I had it imported from Prague. Fort fertilizer, though. You know, very good for us. Yeah, great fertilizer, yeah. that but it's expensive grass too i had it imported from prague fertilizer though you know very good for us yeah great fertilizer yeah but you also sit there you're like oh and i think gee my wife went ben you're up yeah ben you're up and then you're nervous you're like have you got

a pistol bang you got anything you got it but now you know bringing a good dog to another person's house it's like you know the most disobedient child that you can't reason with. Yeah. There's nothing, there's no community. Well, that's what they do. They need to go to the bathroom, but it just feels like

one of those occasions that now it makes me nervous. I was like, oh, dog. Because you can't say, like the kids, you're like, we're going to go on a car trip, make sure you go to the bathroom before we go.

Dogs don't always do that, you know? So I was like, oh, now I'm nervous about bringing the dog to any social functions because of what he could do on the lawn. Well, the worst part

of the afternoon for me was when you did it half an hour later. Yeah. On the lawn. Yeah, okay. That was rough. That was rough. It was really.

And Julian, I was like, Julian, get a place to bed. Julian, you're up. Oh, God, no. Jono and Ben, or as they're known in the office, those two. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. It's Jono and Ben on your Wednesday morning. Summertime, it is barbecue season. A lot of people hanging out, enjoying barbecues.

We actually put a little video on our social media. Check it out, the Hits at the Hits Breakfast on Facebook and Instagram about people you see at a barbecue. Some of my mates used to say, it's me, I'm the craft beer snob or I'm the Weber barbecue snob. Because they are. And I was like, yes, it was influenced by you. They know it.

They make no bones about it, right? It's like the government's roadmap out of this pandemic. Everyone's got an opinion on a barbecue. Everyone's got an opinion on how we should be getting out of this whole thing. But the barbecue for me, I don't know if it's just me, but just through the months of, you know, late December, Jan, Feb, my barbecuing goes from zero to a hundred yeah like so much barbecue and then you just turn it off you forget about it for many

months and then all of a sudden summertime you open up the lignula oh god i didn't clean it last time i used it yeah it's rusty yeah yeah the rust is an interesting one are you like you cook off the rust then you put some meat on the rust and and it kind of blends. In that first couple of barbecues, you're like, oh, someone could very well end up in the poison unit. But you take the risk. But I've got some facts here about the barbecue. And I do want to say, nothing makes you more unsettled

as a diner at someone else's house when you hear them say, we haven't cleaned this thing in 12 years. It's seasoning. Doesn't that make you... Some people love not to clean their barbecue, right? Yeah, when did that become a thing? I don't know.

It becomes almost like a badge of honor. I'm like, no, that's clean. I look at it after every time. I don't want to have a steak with charcoal from 1997 all over it. But here's some facts about it. Did you know U.S. presidents, some U.S. presidents, massive fans of the barbecue, dating back

to Abraham Lincoln and George Washington. George Washington diaried a barbecue that lasted four days. Really? They had their grill over there. They put it on the grill, eh? Talk about having a grill. Oh, is that what they call it? Yeah, right. Which is essentially our barbecue. So four days. Four days.

And then the guests just, you know, they get the ones who linger. But four days. That's a long time. George Washington was too polite to kick them out. Abraham Lincoln, his official wedding feast was a barbecue. Really? Yeah. Chucked a couple of cheese sizzlers on there. What a way to celebrate the nuptials. The largest

attendance at a barbecue, 45,000 people in Mexico attended a barbecue. Wow. It feels like someone who invited everyone for work and then actually included everyone on the email database and they all turned up. I just imagine the stress of that one person cooking the barbecue. I imagine it was a bigger barbecue and lots of people,

but just if it was one guy. It's stressful when you've got six people. Yeah, and everyone stands around judging your work. Yeah, the timing is essential. 60% of grillers, and this goes back to what we were just saying, Ben Boy, 60% of barbecuers barbecue all year round. It's their main cooking source. That's a lot.

Yeah. And 100% of those people say during August and July, it sucks. Yeah, the winter months, not so good. And the world's biggest sausage is five feet long. What? Five foot long, the world's biggest sausage. That is manufactured. You can buy it.

Five feet? Yeah, I've always said you never want a sausage taller than Producer Julia. Haven't I told you that, Ben? It's too much sausage. It's one of your roles. There we go. Those are some facts about the barbecue. Think of that when you're having a summer barbecue this weekend.

Hey, next, there's big news about who could be the next potential James Bond. Yeah, and someone that people have been speaking about and who I reckon would be very, very good. More on that next. Spy, the WhatsApp spy, doco.nz. Her nickname around here is the butcher because she's about to turn some celebrities into mincemeat. Julia, you're up with Spy. nickname round here is the butcher because she's about to turn some celebrities into mincemeat. Juliet,

you're up. It's fine. So there have been talks and whispers about who could be the next James Bond and a few names are thrown around but one that is often recurring is Idris Elba. Oh, yeah. And I think he would be very good. He would be the Bond. Yeah, he would be really good. But now, one of the producers

said that Idris Elba has been part of the conversation to be the next Bond. So haven't confirmed that he will be, but has confirmed that he's been in conversations. But they've decided that Until No Time to Die has kind of done its run, and Daniel Craig has been able to savor all of that. That's when they will start actually thinking about and properly making plans on who they actually want it to be. He'd be really good, actually. Yeah.

You've got to think of it. He'd be awesome. He'd be slick. He'd be, you know. He's got everything you kind of want in a blonde. Yeah. He'd be awesome. He started out as a DJ, didn't he?

That's right. He DJed, didn't he, at the Royal Wedding. Was he? Yeah. Brontarius Wedding. Yeah. Really? He was the DJ for that.

Oh, my God. He was the UK DJ that came over here and then. DJ he? Yeah. For Terry's wedding. Really? Yeah, he was the DJ for that. Oh my God. He was the UK DJ that came over here and then... DJ Omicron, who we all loved. Now, can I just... I know this was weeks and weeks ago. Oh, here we go. But the media did a bang up job of painting this DJ out to be the world's biggest asshole. They had photos of him swilling Chardonnay on the beach and they're like, how can we make this?

How can we make New Zealand hate this man even more? We kind of understand he got to day nine. I mean, how many people would do that? There's probably a whole lot of people that have done that. Obviously they shouldn't do that. He knows that and he apologises. In good old New Zealand fashion, we bullied him out

of the country. That's what we do here. But then he didn't even spread it, did he? No, luckily, yeah. So that was so weird. That was very weird. But I had the effects of that because he didn't perform at R&A. So, you know, that's alright. That was still great. I do want to also mention that But he's never coming back.

And tour manager will be like, I booked you in from New Zealand. Okay, well maybe not. Also, Idris Elba was, I would like to note that he was People's Sexiest Man Alive in 2018. So he would be a very, you know,

good claim that. He would be a wonderful Bond Idris. Yeah, exactly. And Hillary and Chelsea Clinton have been spotted with an unlikely friend, Kim Kardashian. So they were spotted together

at a cafe, but it turns out that they're filming for a new Apple TV series called Gutsy Woman. And so this is going to be a new docu-series on Trailblazer Woman, and it's based on a book that Hilary and Chelsea released a few years

ago. And they're probably just talking to different women who have, and maybe they're both hosting it, I'm not sure. But I would actually like to mention, I listened to a podcast the other day with Kim Kardashian, and it was like an hour-long podcast. Man, she is actually so much smarter than you give her credit for.

Well, you don't become that successful while being an idiot, do you? And everyone just, we mow in on them all the time. They become cheap comedic fodder, but they're probably the world's most successful family. Yeah, and some of the things that I remember from the podcast, Kim says that she's never late. She's probably been late like twice in her life, and it's one of the things that she really, really prioritizes. She said that her kids begged her like over and over to not study law

because she was already so busy, and then she had to like sit them down and like kind of explain the reason why she was so passionate about becoming a lawyer. And you actually think, man, this woman is busy, but she's also very switched on. Yeah, well, she doesn't passionate about becoming a lawyer. And you actually think, man, this woman is busy, but she's also very switched on. Yeah, well, she doesn't need to become a lawyer. No, she really doesn't need to. She's probably more successful than any other hustle woman.

She's already a businesswoman, yeah. That's awesome. So that'll be quite interesting to see that Apple TV series come out in due time. I had a strange dream about Bill Clinton last night. Really? It's just come back to me. Speaking of Hillary Clinton, I was waiting for Bill hillary to get off the plane at the airport

yeah because i don't usually like doing airport pickups but i was like okay i'll help you out it's a bizarre dream and that is five for the south more you can head to the hits.co.nz after seven o'clock dr michael baker joins us so, you can head to the hits.co.nz. After seven o'clock, Dr. Michael Baker joins us. So hopefully we'll get to the bottom of the mask mandate. And $5,000 up for grabs at 7.45. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. Listen, I want to get some calls, if we can, this morning on low-level crime fighters. Have you found yourself in a position where you're fighting crime at a very low level?

So not at a police level. Not at a police level. I mean, you know, you're not slinging around buildings in full-bodied lycra with spiderwebs and stuff. You know, not that sort of high-end crime. You're not busting fraud cases, but you're doing some low levels. What have you claimed that you have stumbled across? Well, something took place outside my house,

and I actually thought you were responsible for it. Me? Yeah, you, because we have a rich history of pranking each other. Right, yeah. You know, pranking never sleeps, and it can happen any time. Keeps you on your toes, right? You've always said many times that unusual occurrences at your house, you thought I had been behind them all. Yeah, I do. You're right.

So I was just doing some stuff on the lawn And then outside Directly outside our house Parked on the road Was an electric vehicle All windows down Okay And it was off All windows down I thought it was unusual

To have the windows down But it's summer And hey We're trusting So no one's in the car No one's in the car Then the car just starts On its own

Oh It just starts And I'm like Did that car just start And then it stopped and then i continue on what i'm doing and the car started again this is a classic ben boys yeah and i thought well ben ben is taking his pranking to a whole other level take a time out of his holidays this is meta stuff but very sort of subtle pranking yeah starting on and off by itself but then i was also thinking this is why we need to stop Elon Musk and what he's doing.

These robots are taking over. So it happened half a dozen times, stopped and started, and it got to the point where I was staring, like looking at someone lying down and just putting start and stop, you know, stopping it. So I walked out and I had a look

in the four open windows and blow me down. The ignition was ripped out. Oh, really? A crime had taken place, and I had that sound effect from Law and Order in my head. That played. And I was like, well, I'm going to need to sort this out.

And my son came out. He was intrigued too, Oscar. So all the windows were open. So what happened? So someone had stolen it? Someone had stolen it, dumped it there. And as it turned out, they'd stolen another car in the street To get away

So they got the man themselves in a hole of stealing cars And then stealing more cars to get away There were two stolen cars So I was going around low-level crime-fighting Are there any cameras on houses Pointing out that I could get evidence Turned out there wasn't So what did you do?

Well, I went back to the car and I was like, oh, there's a nice, well, there's a black Nike hoodie in the passenger seat. And I was like, oh, I wonder what size that hoodie is. For what reason? So you could go, the person who stole the car was a medium or a large. Yeah, so I pulled it out and I was like, a large. And I'm like, oh, I'm a large.

Oh, no, you weren't. And I held it up to my, you know, when I was like a large and I'm like oh I'm a large oh no you weren't and I held it up to my you know when you're in a shop and you're trying on clothes and you hold it up and you're like oh yeah

and then my son's like what are you doing and I'm like oh does this look good on me and he's 11 years but it was a crime already and now you're and this is another thing

now you're almost framing yourself no no but this is the thing yeah your fingerprints are all over the thing yeah well this is what my son told me he's like, your fingerprints are all over the thing. Yeah. Well, this is what my son told me. He's like, now your fingerprints are all over the car, all over the car. And then I chucked the hoodie back in in a panic.

I'm like, oh, God, now my fingerprints are all over the hoodie. But then my thought process was, well, the car's stolen. If it's the owners, they're then going to think the thief's stolen the hoodie. If it's the car thieves, then that's poetic justice, stealing off a stealer. That's why I was like, well, maybe I could take this hoodie with a clear conscience. Or maybe you stole the car and the hoodie is your little way down of going, oh no, I didn't touch a hoodie in the back of the car. Yeah, so there was only one thing I did.

I set the car alight, got rid of it, called the police, and they turned out as a burning inferno. But yes, low-level crime fighting. Have you done any crime? Have you stopped a crime while it was happening yeah we'd love to hear from some everyday heroes next it is the hits you got jonah and ben the hits breakfast with jonah and ben we want to talk about everyday crime stoppers people that have stopped crimes like well you didn't really stop well there was a stolen car outside my house, and then I tried to... I called the non-emergency line.

Have you tried to call the non-emergency line before? No, no. You can tell the non-emergency line's like phoning your 90-year-old nana's landline. They don't answer it. It's not an emergency. Exactly. We can take our time. I was on the phone.

Non-emergency line. They'll answer at some point. 15 minutes. Yeah. But, yes, there was a stolen car outside of my house that I tried to report, and low-level crime. But then in the same breath, I also committed a crime by nearly stealing the hoodie that was inside the car.

It was a nice Nike black hoodie, large, size large, my perfect fit. And my son said, well, well done, idiot. Your fingerprints are all over the hoodie in the car now. So that's my story. But we'll get your calls on 0800 The Hits. We'll kick it off with you, Greg. Welcome to the show. You're a low-level crime fighter.

How? Yeah, this one actually happened to a mate of mine. He got his bike stolen a couple of weeks ago. And he's real gutted about it. And someone said, have a look on Treyby. Normally they'll try to flick these things off. So he jumps on Treyby, has a look, and what do you know, his bike's sitting right there.

So he gives the guy a call, says, hey, look, I'm pretty keen to buy the bike. He's around to the guy's house. You know, oh, yeah, this is definitely his bike. So he says, he goes, look, can I take this for a test ride around the block? Test ride? Of course, mate. So he, you know, heads off around the block and then just heads straight back home,

sells his bike back. So he sells his bike back. That's genius. Hold on. When Greg's mate does it, it's genius. When I do it, I'm an idiot. I was kidding. It wasn't your hoodie.

He cancelled a crime with a crime. I was an idiot. He cancelled a crime with a crime. I was doing the same thing, a crime with a crime. It all evens itself out. That is really clever though. That's really clever. You should be riding fast home on your own bike, wouldn't you? That's for sure. Possession is 19 to the law, so did he essentially steal that poor person's

bike? Maybe he did. Hey, thanks Greg, appreciate it. Mary, you're on from Auckland, low-level crime fighting. What did you do? Well, I've had a lot of packages stolen from outside my front door in the last couple of months. So what I've started to do is when I've got rubbish, I've packaged them up and put my address on them

and people have picked it up for me, which has been nice. Oh, so you put them inside like a courier box or a delivery box, all of your rubbish, and they take your rubbish? Yeah. Oh, so they're stealing what they think is something valuable but they're just taking your rubbish that's a genius hack you're turning the thief into a rubbish collection service that is the best life hack since ben boys accidentally gave me his f-post pin thank you very much mary appreciate that and tiana moreno you're on and oh she's giving up she's

solving another crime, mate. She's fighting crime. Apparently, Tiana, she stopped someone about to rob the neighbor's house. Oh. Really? That would be scary. It would be scary. Yeah, it's not for me.

It's not for me. We're talking low-level crime. That's too heavy for us, Tiana. Maybe that's why she hung up. She's like, I'm too hardcore for this phone topic. We've got Dr. Michael Baker joining us in about 10 minutes' time. We're trying to get our heads around the new mask mandate. What masks can we wear on our face?

What are we allowed to put on? We're going to find out very shortly. It is the hits. Jono and Ben, mornings from six on the hits and streaming live on iHeartRadio. Bit of a mask mandate announced by the Prime Minister yesterday about masks that we need to be wearing and what we're allowed to wear on our faces. We wanted to get to the bottom of it.

We brought him back onto the radio again. He was probably hoping for a much quieter year, but COVID isn't going away, I don't think. Dr. Michael Baker, great to have you on the show. Yes, well, I think we've all had enough now. We want it to go away, but unfortunately, the virus has different plans at the moment. Yeah, it hasn't had enough of us. It loves us. It loves us. It loves us. Now, Michael, the masks

has become a topic of conversation over the last couple of days. The masks that we have been wearing or the majority of people have been wearing, they're not going to protect us against Omicron? Well, not as well as they could. And I think it is really great the government is recognising

that this virus gets around around aerosols and indoor environments. We all know that, but we haven't really, I think, fully embraced masks. So I think this is a good step forward. Right. So yeah, because the cotton masks or the cloth masks and stuff, they're not all made the same. So how do you know if you're wearing a good one or not? And if in doubt, should you be opting for, for if you can a surgical type mask or medical mask yeah look i think there's still a problem with fabric masks because there are some great ones around that will work well and are affordable and the good thing is they're sustainable so you can throw them in the washing machine and if you have a few of them that can get you through the week and I think that's still

a good solution for a lot of people but there isn't a standard for masks when you when you go and look at them you have to make sure that they've got at least three layers but if you're working in an environment where say a food premises or a hospitality you're going to have to actually wear a medical type mask. It will be better, I think, particularly for the public, knowing the staff who are serving them are wearing these better quality masks. I've blown so much money on masks over the last 24 months. I've got more masks than socks, I was telling these guys earlier on this morning. So many masks.

So now I'm going to get some more masks now. The N95, we're hearing a lot about that one. That's the Ferrari of the face masks. Is that the preferred option, although it's a bit more pricier, Michael? Yeah, and I think particularly for people who are older and more vulnerable, this does give you that really high level of protection. Is that just the one you can just wear that once, or you can use it multiple times or you can use it multiple times?

You can use it multiple times if you look after it. If you are really serious about wearing these, you might have five of them. You might have one for each day of the week. And you'd wear it on that day and then at the end of the day you'd hang it up and it would be, any virus on it would have died by the next time you need it

dr michael baker joins us right now as an epidemiologist uh how come covid gives us a little bit of time out if we're sitting at a restaurant and we take our masks off to eat and drink how come it's sort of you know it knows the rules to sort of wait until like i know honestly though i'm obviously making a joke here but, but getting my head around that seems a bit unusual, especially for you as an epidemiologist, right? Yeah. There are a lot of quirks in the use of masks still, and you're right, I think. And we've all been there.

We've been into the cafe, our restaurant. We've worn our mask in. We sit down, and then we take it off to eat and drink. And it doesn't really make much sense. It's still remembering it's about dampening down transmission it won't stop every um episode and that's why um people still have to be seated in those venues i'm starting to think do we need to think of another way to ingest food in public uh and there's only one other option I can pick off. Is that a say? It's a say.

Now, Michael, you don't need to be dragged down to the gutter on this one. He's got a good name and a reputation to uphold. Now, Michael, producer Ben Humphrey actually raised a very good point. You see someone vaping. They suck on their vape pen. They blow it out. There's a big, a massive cloud of smoke. Is that a visual representation of everyone's breath walking around?

We just obviously can't see it. Yep. No, that's a pretty good representation. That is the problem. The virus, remember, has evolved through natural selection to be very good at getting from person to person. And now, the new Omicron one in particular reproduces a lot in the upper airways, which is good news because it doesn't cause such serious illness. The bad news is, of course, every breath you take, it's going out. Wow.

Well, we should get Sting to write a song about it. Every breath you take. Yeah, get onto it. Dr. Michael Baker, we should get Sting to write a song about it. Every breath you take. Yeah, get on to it. Dr. Michael Baker, we always do appreciate your time. You're doing some wonderful work, and thank you very much. Yeah, great to talk. Welcome to Two Half-Assed Dads Do a Half-Assed Job. Official title, Jono and Ben, New Zealand's Breakfast.

Just had Mickey B on, Dr. Michael Baker, the epidemiologist, and he was sort of talking about mask wearing, what we need to do now. Essentially, the takeaway from it was you either wear a medical-grade mask or a three-layered mask. And I've just thought, why don't I just wear three masks? There's three layers of masks. You might have found a hack. I should have pitched it to him.

You might not be able to breathe But you found a hack Or communicate Sound like I'm gagged What's he saying? Now I want to get real for a second right here But this is Julia Real talk

I'm so concerned by this I have no idea what you're going to talk about You've given me a dodgy website Have I? Yes And now I look like a dodgy individual at home Did you share a website. Have I? Yes, and now I look like a dodgy individual at home. Did you share a website link?

I don't know. I always get nervous sharing website links. It's like when you give an elderly member of your family access to your computer. You always want to triple check the content before you fire off a link. Yeah, and my wife now doesn't believe me that it's come from a website you gave me. Now, I want to get a little bit technical, a little bit nerdy at the moment. I basically asked you a while back if there's a way you can convert youtube videos to mp4 and you're like here use this site i always use this and i have i used it on the home computer and it does work it works perfectly in that regard yes but then these little pop-ups have started to come up since i started

using the sign yeah on this website and they said the first pop-up was like from new zealand supermarkets i won't name them. They're like, hey, your gift is waiting for you. And it's clearly obviously not spam. So these pop up. Yeah. And then the other day, my wife was on the home computer. And next to the supermarket, she's like, who's Anna?

I was like, oh, God, you never want to hear. You never want to hear as a husband, who's Anna? I'm like, who's Anna? Because even if you don't know an Anna, you start getting nervous. I don't know. And she goes, well, apparently she's got seven photos ready for you right now. Oh, that's classic Anna. She always goes one above the half a dozen.

I love the number seven. Very specific number. And she's given away a wee little saucy photo as well. A teaser. Is that counted as one of the seven or is it? I don't know. I didn't click on it A little teaser. A teaser of one of the seven. Is that counted as one of the seven or is it? I don't know. I didn't click on it.

I was like, oh, this will be from the website that Juliet... Then I explained the situation. How do you know it's from the website that Juliet sent? Because it's the same pop-ups along the side next to the... Oh, do you know? I've never had these before. Hold on. When did you send him this link?

Gosh, quite a while ago. Really last year at some point. Months ago. And this is what's happening recently? It's happened since. You can't pin a link from August on your shady content. That's not for me. I'm not looking at anything shady.

But now it looks like I am. It's all along the same right-hand side of the screen. It started with supermarket gifts that I needed to claim. And it's ended up with strange ladies with very specific numbers of photos available. Yeah, there's someone else the other night, Rachel. She was feeling naughty

as well. My wife was like, she apparently wanted to play and I was like, well, no. This is not the time. Rachel, if you're naughty, then go and have a look

in the mirror. It's not playtime. It's not, yeah. So this is all pinned on you. Oh, excuse me. You know, I'm just trying to help out at work. Colleague, it's not my fault that, you know, pop-up ads come up. A logical question for you, Producer Juliet, is that you use this website.

Yes. Are you also receiving? No, I'm not. I'll show you. I'm not. I'll take a screenshot tomorrow and I'll show you. You know how ads are targeted by what you usually search? Yeah.

Listen, I'm not. I knew this was going to backfire. You're not Mark Zuckerberg or anything, but I'd assume if you're putting in the same link and she's putting in the same link, that you'd be being served the same ad. Do you not care? Even the super...

No. No one's been naughty? No. Yeah, it's all PG over here. Oh, there we go. I'm going to regret bringing that up. We've got $5,000 up for grabs very shortly. It is the hits. You've got John on bed.

Five words for 5k on the hits. You're only five words away from a massive payday. Our Game of Words Association we play every morning on the hits. Match all five words with our five words and you win $5,000. Yeah, Katrina, we're going to have some words with you. Some serious words. Hopefully to win

your five grand in Christchurch this morning. How are you? I'm pretty good, thank you. They tell us it's raining in the Canterbury region. Not flashed today. It's not full of weather, absolutely not. Farmers will be happy. Oh, yeah, they always love the rain, apparently.

Yeah, farmers. It'll be good for them in the garden, but, yeah, not for work. It's good weather. Whenever it's raining, farmers will be happy. That's all you need to say in New Zealand, and everyone knows you're from New Zealand. Yeah. Hey, Katrina, what do you do? I work in a school office.

Oh, right. Getting prepared for school very shortly? Yeah, absolutely. Just getting things in place before everybody comes back and it turns to madness and chaos. Yeah, and when you're expected to keep five-year-olds in masks all day, etc. Yeah, that's going to be interesting. That'll be interesting. It's not just Indus' problem, it's yours. You deal with it, okay? Thanks very much. Who do you want to send into the

soundproof booth? I'm going to go Ben this morning, please. Okay, Ben Boyce heading into the soundproof booth. Actually, you don't know the soundproof booth is an anti-vaxxer and it's been the source of much awkwardness in the studio every morning, but we welcome it with open arms. All right, let's win you $5,000.

Katrina, you know how the game works. First word that comes into your head when I say smiley. Face. Smiley face. Recycle is word number two this morning. Couple of boxes there. I'm going to go recycle and bin.

The word was recycle, but you want to go bin? Bin's a good option. Yeah, I might come back to that one a second, okay? Alright, we'll go on to Monopoly for the third word this morning. Board game? Board game, beautiful. Board game. Board game. Beautiful. Apple.

Fruit. Fruit. Transport is the fifth word. That's quite a tough one, isn't it? But I feel I'm in a chaos. I'm going to go car. Car. Yep. And we'll leap back to recycle.

I'm not changing to go reuse. Reuse. I'm going to go reuse. Okay. All right. That's your five words locked in, Katrina. Let's get Ben Boyce out of the SPB, the soundproof booth. Fresh, your first time back in there in 2022.

How was it? It was nice. Self-isolating in the soundproof booth. Did it miss you? Did it say it missed you? No, I didn't miss it. When I went in there, it said it missed me. Anyway, we'll get into it.

Five words you need to match with Katrina. Working in a school office. All right, we can do this, Katrina. She could phone her boss this morning and say, I resign. And then once the $5,000 had run out, beg her boss for her job back. Yeah, I'm back again. First word was smiley. Face.

Recycle. Bin? Katrina! Oh, it did go bin. She had locked in bin, then changed it to reuse To be honest, I thought it was controversial, but I didn't say anything out loud There we go, out at word number two

We'll see how the remainder would have gone Monopoly Game Board game Oh, so we were close, but Apple Fruit Transport Car Oh, we were close close, but... Apple. Fruit.

Transport. Car. Oh, we were close. Well, you were. We're a board and been away from winning that. You were almost compatible, but your relationship would have turned to tatters in year five and you would have stayed together for the kids.

That's how that matched up. Katrina, have a great day in Christchurch. Thank you so much for listening. You too, guys. Enjoy it. Another chance to play tomorrow morning. If we match all five words with you, you will win $5,000. It's a fun game, but Jesus, it's hard to match all five. It is a hit.

Spy, the WhatsApp spy.co.nz. There are two things that are for certain in this life, that the world's about to end, and there'll always be a Kardashian news story for Juliet to read on the radio. That is actually so true, so reliable, the Kardashians. So Benedict Cumberbatch has spoken more about living in New Zealand. He was here in 2020 filming Power of the Dog, and he ended up being sucked into our very first lockdown in March of 2020.

And he basically said he loved lockdown in New Zealand. His wife and his kids were there. His parents were meant to come down for three weeks but ended up staying for five months because they loved it so much. And also because they couldn't leave at the same time as well. That's what we say to people that we don't release. They're just loving it so much. Yeah, I know.

He said it was far away from home but they found a new one here, which was very nice. And we love it when they... He was in the Hawke's Bay and he posted a social media photo, didn't he? And we were analysing the bookshelf and the books in the bookshelf, where exactly he could be, and they narrowed it down, didn't they?

Yeah, apparently Hawke's Bay. Can I just commend producer Juliet on getting his name correct? Oh, yes. Can we find that audio around? Can we play that? Oh, yes. I think it was around about the time we were analysing the bookshelf, Juliet was analysing how to say his name correctly. And so they're like, oh my gosh, Benedict Cumberbatch.

Benedict Cumberbatch. Oh, it's such hard words. Benedict Cumberbatch. Benedict Cumberbatch is in the Hulk phone. Exactly. Kenabit Cumberbatch. I'm going to stop you there before you say something like that. I've learnt now.

Yeah, you've done very well. I nearly called him Benedict Cumberbatch. Benedict. He's, I mean, now. Yeah, you've done really well. I nearly called him Penidot. Come on, mate. Penidot? He's, I mean, to be fair, like, get a better name. Like a more pronounceable name. He should change his last name to Eggs.

Yeah. That would be very good. And come. By a patch. Yeah. You know, sort of just shorten it down. Yeah. And Taylor Swift is kind of making headlines

at the moment because she has called out big time damon olburn uh from the band blur this this one very hardcore rock that um so basically Damon had written an article saying that Taylor Swift doesn't write her

own songs and in fact she co-writes and according to him there's a big difference she then tweeted Damon Albarn I was such a big

fan of yours until I saw this I write all my own songs your hot take is completely false and so damaging you don't have to

like my songs and it's really beefed up to try and discredit my writing. Wow. And then she then followed up saying, P.S. I wrote this tweet all by myself in case you were wondering. Yes, Taylor Swift swears. So she was very passionate in that one. I suppose you would be too.

Her music's her, that's her credibility when it comes to me. We've lost all credibility when it comes to radio, Ben. You and me. We wouldn't be offended if Damon Albarn credibility when it comes to radio, Ben, you and me. We wouldn't be offended if Damon Albarn called us out. We're like, yeah, there you are. If anything, yeah, he mentioned us. Great, shout out.

But he's since apologised as well. Oh, yes, he has. He said, sorry, it was a thing that I just said in an article that it got turned into clickbait. Classic. He was using it as an example. He wasn't fully educated and he unreservedly apologises. Wonderful. Well, that's good.

I'm not doing that because it would be gutting for her if she was a big fan of his as well too. Totally. You'd be pretty disheartened by that, yeah. And that is Spy for this hour from where you can head to the hitstopco.nz. Well, I heard all that Ben Bullis doesn't even use his own mouth to talk. Hi, it's someone else. Yeah, someone else is actually doing it. Hey, after 8 o'clock on the show, we want to talk about what you haven't been able to buy lately.

We talk about supply chain issues. You go to the supermarket. There's panic buying going on. What have you found? Give us a text, 4487, right now. What can't you get at the moment? There's some unusual items. Yeah.

A dressing. A particular cellar dressing you can't get for any high or... Oh, no. What are you saying? Shut up. Can I borrow your person to use my mouth? It is a hat. You've got Jono and Ben. Warning. This show contains traces of Jono and Ben. Oh, now he's got a mouth to finish that. Can I borrow your person to use my mouth? There's the hits. You've got Jono and Ben.

Morning. This show contains traces of Jono and Ben. The Hits with Jono and Ben for breakfast. A lot of announcements from the government. There's another one today about Omicron, how they plan to combat it. Yesterday they announced a bit of a mask mandate, and you couldn't wear things that weren't meant to be masks on your face. That comes to an effect next Thursday.

And Dr Michael Baker, we spoke to him earlier today about it. There isn't a standard for masks. When you go and look at them, you have to make sure that they've got at least three layers. But if you're working in an environment where, say, a food premises or a hospitality, you're going to have to actually wear a medical type mask. It will be better, I think, particularly for the public, knowing the staff who are serving them are wearing these better quality masks. Yeah, there we go.

And everyone looks, I find everyone looks 50, probably maybe 50 to 75% sexier in a mask. You know, when I see Ben Boyce now, I'm like, ooh, his eyes and forehead. Bit of mystery. Bit of mystery. Yeah, and you kind of guess what the nose, mouth and chin situation is like, don't you? You like to imagine. The N95 one, a lot of people talking about those ones at the moment, aren't they?

They're meant to be the ones, the best ones on me, Crom. But not the best ones I found. I found a child one on yesterday for the first time. I kind of look like a trophy, like a William Woballus trophy. My ears sort of, like you can sort of pick me, Richie McCall could have picked me up. He's as light as a trophy, too. You can pick him up. Yeah.

Maybe you could become the new Rugby World Cup trophy. Just put on with the mask on. Yeah. But there's a lot of talk also around supply chain issues, SCIs, and the... No one's saying SCIs. I am. I'm trying to get it off the list. Everyone's just saying that you guys...

Why does the acronym not work? It does, but no one knows what it means yeah so yeah people are going to the supermarket at the moment there was a wee wave

of panic buying hopefully that's stopped a little bit now yeah we were talking to our boss Emily she's like there's no Caesar salad dressing

this is an everyday problem this is an everyday problem her Caesar salads are just it's basically she's got no moisture. It's just a salad. No, just a salad with weird dried croutons in it.

Leaves your mouth going. No moisture. No creamy moisture on top. She can't get any Caesar salad dressing. No, no. She's tried it in many supermarkets. Yeah, it's all gone. Caesar would be rolling in his grave.

I don't think he had anything to do with the Caesar salad, Julius Caesar. Oh, really? No, some restaur the Caesar salad, Julius Caesar. Oh, really? No, some restaurateur from Mexico, I think, whose restaurant was called Caesar's. That's why it was, yeah. But I've always given credit to Julius Caesar for that wonderful salad. Toilet paper, obviously. We know people panic buy cat food at the moment.

Interesting, people stocking up on their Panadol. Trumpets, there's a limit on trumpets at New World. Yum, I can see why. You can't's a limit on trumpets at New World. Yum. I can see why. You can't panic by too many trumpets at the moment. We're not talking about the obnoxiously loud instrument. No, the ice cream. Because they could have a supply chain shortage on the instrument.

They could help a lot of learning trumpeters out. Also, onion rings at Burger King. You apparently can't get those. No, the king's running out of onion rings. Then the king would be like, this is why I'm the the burger king there's no supply chain issues on the burgers yeah we can do without the onion rings we can survive for a few weeks you know the colonel's sweating shaking in his boots if the chickens start having a supply chain issue he's really he's nailed his foot to the floor on what he's dealing with so what are you discovering that's not around what can't you get at the moment spoke

to a builder mate the other day. Jib board. Do you want to get jib board in the next six months? Well, don't think about it, mate. Have you Googled what a jib board is since then? Not really. I just know you keep saying it. You can't get it.

Jib, you want some jib? You can't get it, Juliet. Wonderful. Any strange items that you've noticed that you can't get at the moment, producer Juliet? Oh, mainly bread, but that's a bit of a classic one, I think. And I have to, I'm usually a Vogel's gal, but I had to go for, what is it, Bruggen? Bruggen?

Bruggen's good. Bruggen? I'm not usually a Bruggen. Bruggen? It's Bruggen. Oh, you're a white bread all the way, aren't you? Oh, yeah. My bread is super white, super thick. Bruggen's good. Bruggen is good.

Is it? Oh, okay. Is it something you'd spread? Oh, Bruggen. It's pronounced Bruggen. Okay, it's pronounced Bruggen. Well, Bruggen, or Bruggen is good. I just don't know how to say it. You, it's pronounced Bergen. Well, Bergen, oh, Bergen is good. I just don't know how to say it. You've somehow offended

an entire nation thanks to mispronouncing their breed. Okay, 0800 The Hits. Odd items that you can't get thanks to SCIs. Supply chain issues. Give us a call. The Hits with Jono and Ben.

A lot of talk about Omicron and how we're going to combat that, but it has meant there's a bit of a supply chain. People are sick overseas and we can't get supplies into the country. That's what they're worried about. Onion rings from Burger King. Who knew we were getting our rings of onion from overseas?

Yeah. But the king has been and can't get them right now. Emily, our boss, very upset there's no Caesar salad dressing now. How much Caesar salad are they eating? I love a Caesar salad. I can't remember the last? I love a Caesar salad but I love this, you know.

I can't remember the last time I had a Caesar salad. I mean, it's good. But to mow through it so quickly that you're in a shortage of Caesar salad dressing. So she had to improvise

last night and have ranch salad dressing. Which I guess kind of works but it changes. It's no longer a Caesar salad, right? No. It's a ranch.

It's a ranch salad. Yeah, it's a salad with ranch dressing. The Thousand Island, that's always an option. It's great, yeah. It's wonderful. Balsamic, a It's a ranch salad. Yeah, it's a salad with ranch dressing. The Thousand Island, that's always an option. It's great, yeah. It's a wonderful... A bowl of sarmac, a bowl of sarmac's good. There's some great condiments out there, Ben, there's no arguing that.

And we've just listed some of them. So we're going to go to the phones, supply chain issues, odd items that you can't get at the moment. Hi, Charlotte. Hi. If that is even your real name. Yeah, is it? Oh, okay, a bit of mystery around this call. How are you, Charlotte. Hi. If that is even your real name. Yeah, is it? Oh, okay. A bit of mystery around this call.

How are you, Charlotte? All right? I'm good. Yeah, really good, thanks. Yeah, we're talking your supply chain issues this morning. Getting to the tough topics on the John O'Berry Breakfast. Oh, yeah, man. So we've got, like, the usual toilet paper, sanitizer, paper towels,

but some interesting little ones, hash browns. Hash browns, and gee whiz. And frozen chips, and it's really random because that's what happened the last time as well. You just can't get frozen chips and hash browns. I was going to say, I can't even remember a moment in my life where I've purchased deep freeze hash browns. Yeah.

Oh, I've never tried the deep... Yeah, obviously you've got to cook them first. Yeah. You know, because I do like a McDonald's hash browns. Yeah. Oh, I've been like, never tried the deep... Yeah, obviously you've got to cook them first. Yeah. You know, because I do like a McDonald's hash brown. How do they compare? They're good. Yeah, well, that's what we're going to have to do now, right? Yeah, so hash brown,

there's a shortage in hash browns, there's a shortage in, obviously, toilet paper and stuff. Yeah. My question is, why does everyone, when in moments like these, have uncontrollable desire to wipe their bottom?

Well, it feels like it just causes more panic, doesn't it? Yeah, well, that's the rant. And then people buy all the paper towels and tissues too, so you can't even wipe it with that. So you were opting for a handy towel backup, were you? Yeah, man. I'm going to have to go back to like uni days of what the guys do, phone books or something.

Phone books or maybe while you're at McDonald's getting your hash browns, pick up a couple of napkins. Oh, yeah, ask for extra. That's a good idea. It's crazy. It causes more panic, though, because they say don't panic, don't panic, but then you see these shots and you hear these stories, and you're like, what if I go there and I can't get bread

or I can't get things? I'm going to have to get it, you know? Exactly, exactly. It just creates panic. I love it how every time we go bread or I can't get things, I'm going to have to get it, you know? Exactly, exactly. It just creates panic. I love it how every time we go into this, Jacinda's like, now, don't go and panic buy. And all we do is go and panic buy. As soon as she says, now, don't go, I'm already at the supermarket.

Yeah. Panicking. Okay, well, so are you fully stocked now? No. No? The bottom is at what? I'm trying not to panic buy. I'm just trying to, you know, live my life.

You do try not to, but you can't help it. You can't help it. I mean, if I see hash browns, I'm buying them. Oh, good luck with the hash browns. I'm going to stab another shopper for those hash browns. Yeah. Well, good on you. Thank you very much for calling through this morning, Charlotte,

even if that is your real name. No worries. Have a great day. Yeah, you too. Thanks. Colin's on 0800 The Hits. Supply chain issues, odd items you can't get. Colin?

Yes, it's not really something you can't get, but it's more of a limit. So in Devonport, of all places, you can only buy four tins of tinned salmon, not five. Four tins? Wowinned salmon, not five. Four tins? Five. Five is too much. Now, I'm putting this in the Caesar salad dressing category. How much tinned salmon are you consuming?

Well, if I'm going to be locked away for a little while, I want to see how much I can get. Yeah, right. Tinned salmon doesn't seem like my first port of call, but you're a poor customer. There you go. Someone else has texted in, 4487, the magic dessert

chocolate sauce. For seven months they haven't been able to get magic dessert chocolate sauce. Oh, really? What even is that? Don't even think about getting it, you can't get it. Those desserts are the opposite of magic at the moment without that sauce. Thank you so much for your texts and calls. Next on the

show, a friend of the show, Chris Mack from 660. He wants to tell us about something that's gone on with him and the band in the US. So we join him very shortly. You laugh and you cry. You live and you die. That's all she wrote. That's all she wrote.

That is 660. And we've got one of the band with us joining us from the States right now. Is that Christopher Mack, professional bass player for the popular New Zealand band 660 on the telephone? That's right. I did get my knighthood. You did? I'm sorry about that.

It was either you or it was Chris Mack, professional American college basketball coach. Oh, really? Is it Chris Mack? I didn't know that. I mean, I could do that as well. Yeah, you seem like it. You like basketball?

Yeah. I do love basketball. You know that about me. Ben knows it about me. You'd be quite an erratic coach, though, I mean, I could do that as well. Yeah, you seem like it. You like basketball? Yeah. I do love basketball. You know that about me. Ben knows it about me. You'd be quite an erratic coach, though, I imagine, Chris Mack. Oh, I'd fly off the handle at the first opportunity, to be honest. Oh, the old hothead got ejected from the game again, you know? Yeah.

Well, it's nice to hear your voice, friend of the show. We haven't spoken for a while. Because you've been away for a long time overseas. You know, we're playing gigs with 660 through Europe and America. How are things out there in the real world? No, it's good, mate.

It's good. We're out here working on a new album and we're playing some shows. And no, it's good. We're enjoying the weather here in LA, but looking forward to getting home. Miss, you know,

seeing my friends like you guys. I miss my puppies. You know, I just want to get home. Listen, if you want to heed any advice from me, don't come home at the moment. Probably not an ideal time. Like Ben said, how's it out there in the real world? I don't know what sort of world he thinks

we're living in here in New Zealand, but in Los Angeles. Is Omnicron everywhere in America and they're just getting on with life? Yeah, they're just going for it. Living their life. Sports is on. Gigs are on. just going for it. They're just living their life. Like, you know, sports is on,

you know, gigs are on. I don't know. It's just normal here. And masks? Is everyone on masks or not? Yeah, you know, you go into a restaurant

and you wear a mask to sit down and then once you sit down you can't get COVID apparently. So then you can take your mask off. But if you get up

to go to the bathroom you've got to put it back on. Now we've got Chris Mack from 660 joining us on the phone from the USA. Now, Chris, we've got a bit of a feud, you and I, back and forth, that wherever we turn up at the same event, sports game, concert, you've always got better tickets. I mean, you're in 660. I mean, it makes sense.

But this has backfired, we understand, for you in the US. I had this opportunity over here. So our management company, they have, you know, season tickets, you know, the Lakers and the Clippers and my daughter's a big Clippers fan.

For reasons that confuse me to the second, she decided she loves the Clippers. Loves the Clippers, yeah. I said to them, oh, look, it'd be so cool

if we could get some tickets and management said, oh, we've got some. It's like midday on last Monday and I get a text from my manager saying,

hey, you're at the game. I said, what do you mean? And he said, we sent tickets through. I didn't see these tickets. So the game started. And so I'm panicking. I'm yelling at the family going, get dressed.

They're trying to make themselves look good. I'm like, there's no time for that. Just wear the underwear. We'll get the merch or something. And so we get in an Uber. We drive down. I look at the ticket. There's only two tickets.

And by my count, there's three of us. Oh, no. He realizes in an Uber on the way to the NBA game. Yeah. And so my wife and I look at each other with that kind of no-speak argument. And I figure, you know what? I go to stuff all the time. Maybe I'll be able to get a ticket.

The game's already started. You'll probably be able to get something. We turn up. We try and get them in. The people at the door go, oh no, you can't use this door. You've got to go around to the side door. Oh, it's a side door. It's like a whole thing to get into this game. And I start thinking, these tickets are really good. I'm about to

give up really good tickets. So we get them through. I'm stressed. We're stressed out. I get them through. I'm stressed. We're stressed out. I get them in. I go, don't worry, guys. I'll go buy a ticket. And then they start sending me texts immediately like, oh, my God, these tickets are incredible.

We're right on the court side. They're sending me photos. My wife's saying, hey, they give us free food and drinks. I'm pretty sure she had like, this is the greatest. They're like, this is amazing. Rubbing it in my face. So I start thinking, you know what? Screw it.

I'm going to splurge. I'm going to go get really good tickets because I'm sure there's some left. I go out. I find the guy. And I said, what are the best tickets you got? Thinking, you know, how much am I going to have to spend to be with my family and to create a nice memory? I go to get my wallet. I had forgotten that I lost my wallet.

So you can't even get into the game at all? I can't get in. I can't go to the game. I see a bar across the road that's playing the game. I sadly walk in. I have enough money, cash in my pocket, for one singular beer. So for an hour and a half, I'm sitting on a rickety bar stool, nursing a lukewarm fear, watching a game, and the worst thing is, I can see them on the TV.

There's moments like those that you go, why did I have a family? Now you know how it feels where I go to any event. That's what it's like looking on to those. You've had a small taste of what is the big disappointment that has been his life. How does it feel? How does it feel? I'm like that all the time. You know, can't get lucky, Stars, you're not stuck in a room with me every morning.

That's the worst scene in the house, to be honest. Sitting next to Jono. Hey, Chris, lovely to hear your voice again. We miss you over here. We hear you every day on the radio, of course, though. Take care

and we'll catch up with you soon, buddy. Yeah, miss you guys. See you soon. Two dads just trying to fill some airtime. Some might say it's pointless, but the main thing is it fills in some airtime for us.

That is the main thing. Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. I just like the fade out of that song where she's like, shake off the glitter. That's really speaking to me at the moment as my daughter's been involved in some glitter-based projects at home. And it's sort of attached all over my chest and you can't get it off, you can't shower it off. I think it's almost up there with Omicron. Spreads just like that, doesn't it? It's contagious and it sticks with you.

It certainly does i um got home yesterday and i was just uh i was having a shower i don't know if this is the same in your household if you're listening um if you have children they're not they're spatially aware are they kids like uh they're not they haven't gauged you know what situation is appropriate in what room to have a conversation yeah yeah i't know when that kicks in, what age, but it certainly hasn't happened in our household. So I'm in the bathroom and I'm having a shower and I hear,

this is my son Oscar. He's like, you in there? I was like, yeah. He's like, what are you doing? I said, I'm having a shower. He's like, what are you doing in there? And it's not often that when you go, I'm having a shower, there's a follow-on question. A follow-on question, yeah, true. You know where you're like, oh, well, yeah.

I've never had to... Unless you heard something unusual going on, you'd be like, well, they're having a shower. Yeah. What more detail do you want? Yeah. And he's like, turn off the shower. I said, I can't.

I'm coming to... He's like, you need to turn off the shower. I've got a movie idea I want to pitch to you. He is so like you. He actually is. And I hadn't met him until the end of last year. And I remember John saying, yeah, yeah, Oscar's like me, Poppy's like Jen.

And I was like, this will be interesting to see. And I'm like, holy kicker, they are the same person. Very impulsive. If something's in his head, he's got to be doing it. Doesn't stop talking. It's so funny. It's very true. So true so he's i've got a movie idea you need to turn off the shower i'm like oh can it just wait you know for three to five minutes i'll be out of here then we can have this movie pitch he's like no it needs to happen now it needs to

happen now now i'm sure when you know people are pitching ideas to movie producers and stuff and they're inside a room and they're like what are you doing in there yeah you know i'm sure they probably should have asked that question more of harvey weinstein maybe if there was someone pitching a film to him so anyway i got out uh earlier than i had hoped in the shower there's a bit soap running down my face and stuff and he's like okay here's an idea he's come up with for a movie here's my movie idea okay there's a team of people, and they're on the run. They're all on the run. They have to run away individually. And then you have Dog the Bounty Hunter tracking them down. And I'm like, well, this sounds like more of a reality TV show than a movie.

Yeah, right. But I like where you're going with this. He's like, so all these people that run, they get to hide. They get a couple of days to hide. Wherever they hide, they're on the run. They're on the run from a bounty hunter. And whoever lasts the longest on the run wins the prize money. And I'm like, this is...

What? Yeah, I said, well, not a movie, but, you know, still a fantastic TV series. You can see that on Netflix. I was like, I'm glad you got me out of the shower for this. And then we sat down last night. TV3? Yes. Yes. I was like, I'm glad you got me out of the shower for this. And then we sat down last night. TV3? Yes.

Yes. I was just going to say that. There's a bloody ad on TV3 going, we're looking for survivors who want to go on the run and be chased by,

you know. It's basically people going to track people through the bush in New Zealand. Trackers, yeah. It's, yeah. Oh, jeez.

Don't you hate that? Oh, I hate it. It was the same feeling that when we came up with Jono and Ben and we turned on the TV and saw Hamish and Andy. They're doing it better. They're doing it better. The wind was out of our sails and we've just been...

We still did it. Yeah. Now we've just been chugging along ever since. That's the hits you got, Jono and Ben. Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. For more podcasts from the Hits Network, check out iHeartRadio.co.nz.