Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: How Long Will It Take For Our Fathers To Say "I Love You" Back?

Episode Date: September 3, 2021

With Father's Day this Sunday, we each made a call to our dads, told them we loved them, and then started a timer to see how long it would take for them to say it back... Because this particular generation of dad's don't generally dish out "I love you" a whoooole lot. We also played an old song we recorded with Kings and Ben's dad called "DAD JOKES", an absolute banger filled with some of your classic dad jokes. We had a bit of an intervention with Jono too, about his emails. Again. But this time, it's to do with his typos that are so blimmen hard to decipher. Enjoy the poddy!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

John Owen Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of John Owen Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the John Owen Ben podcast. Hey guys, welcome. Friday the 3rd of September, 2021.

It's John Owen Ben back at you with the podcast Apparently the podcast number's been going all right Ben Oh that's good Doubled in viewership Listenership I don't know when Boss Todd Says oh you know doing well has doubled He doesn't stipulate where it started

He doesn't say what has doubled on No but I was part of that conversation He said the other day He was like, the podcast is going good or something. And then a few days later, today, you were like, oh, I hear the podcast. He's like, what? What? You're like, the podcast is going good. Oh, yeah.

And he's like, yeah, yeah, no, yeah, no, yeah. It sounded like you were scrambling for it. I was wanting hard data. It felt like the first time he said it, maybe he was embellishing it. And then you called him back on it. He's like, oh, geez, I did say that. Yeah, no, no. It's a go.

Yeah, double. Yeah, great. Yeah, yeah. He did seem in a bit of a flat, didn't he? When I was like, okay, what are the stats on it? And he was like, oh, hold on, let me just. We're not really looking at the individual stats. The dashboard, very impressive dashboard.

I don't even know what a dashboard is. They use the word dashboard. He's like, oh, get Ellen. Yeah. Ellen will send you the dashboard. No, that's Ellen DeGeneres, too. You know, that's. Yeah, so she's interested in our podcast stats. I don't think. Ellen will send you the dashboard. That's Ellen DeGeneres too. She's interested in our podcast

stats. I don't think she'll send us anything but that's fine. Can't wait for that dashboard from her.

Fun week. Fun week. Even though there's a giant lockdown going on outside, most of the country is still

at home. Some of the country getting to enjoy the greasy deep fried goodness of takeaways and other

parts of the country like us us, slowly dying inside. Yeah. It's a cheery note, isn't it? Do you know, my son had to do a school project yesterday, and I was like, the idea was he had to present a news bulletin from 2100. So it's many years in the future, and it's the effects of what global warming has had on the planet.

Oh, yeah. And they're, and it's the effects of what global warming has had on the planet. Oh, yeah. And they're like, here's the facts now. You present your news bulletin as if it's in, you know, 80 years or something. And so I was helping him do the thing, and I was filming him, and I was like, well, this is all cheery stuff, isn't it? Well, yeah. It's like residents are being urged to flee their beachside due to rising sea levels. And, you know, Auckland's been in a drought because of the rising temperature, because the sun can't get through the clouds

and so they trap the temperature, the earth gets hotter. And I was like, I don't want this now. I was like, this is... Was there a channel change option? This is bleaker than the real news. Yeah. Well, no, let's not start the podcast with that. But you're right.

I said to him, listen, this is all going to be your problem. I'm not going to have to deal with it. And that's the bonus. That's what I'm happy with. That's what many generations have done to put us in this position. Yeah. Yeah, our parents. But they're still alive to hear us bitching and moaning about it.

And they're like, we paid for you to get educated. There's some intergenerational banter there. On the program today, we had a pretty fun show, actually. Father's Day heregenerational banter there. On the program today, we had a pretty fun show, actually. Father's Day here in New Zealand on Sunday. And so Father's Day is always on a Sunday. Never not on a Sunday.

I think it's the first weekend of September. First Sunday of September, yeah. It doesn't move around like a birthday. And we both played a game with our dads where we had to say, I love you. And then a timer started in between us saying I love you and them replying or doing the return.

And some interesting results. Yeah, not great. Humbling results. Not great results. He had a voice. I liked his one. He was your dad. He had a really good reaction at first.

It was a reaction of awkwardness and he didn't know what to say. Yeah. I sort of felt like I put him out You nudged him though, you nudged him in the right direction And he came back, he came back unequivocally Unequivocally Saying he loves you, so that was good

My dad not so much, even with gentle nudges No, and your mum wouldn't do it publicly No, yeah, Annie answered the phone first And she was not willing to go on public record So I sent it to you in a text But not publicly, not publicly. So enjoy that on the podcast as well as our song all about dads and dad jokes.

Have a listen. The Hits. New Zealand's breakfast. It's Jono and Ben. Got me in love. On The Hits. Kia ora, good morning. Just gone seven o'clock.

Jono and Ben with you on The Hits. It is Father's Day on Sunday. My dad, Kevin Boyce, he's kind of the king of the dad joke. He loves a dad joke. He always has. One he used to, it was a long play. We used to drive along this road and he'd be like, oh, there's electrical current that's outside here and you can feel it. You know, put

your hand on the window and it gives you a shock. You put your hand on the window, you'll feel the pain. And that was the thing. And he would go up there and you put your hand on the window and he goes, oh, the window pain. Oh my God. Now he would go up there, and you'd put your hand on the window, and he goes, oh, the window pane. Oh, my God. That was one of his classics. Now, unfortunately, producer Juliet at 23 years old

already has her head in her hands. You're not going to like this, Juliet, because we co-labbed with Kevin Boyce, didn't we, and all of his best jokes, and also we caught hip-hop artist Kings at a weak moment in his career, and we got him to jump on board the song as well.

So we want to thank Kings. This is his first royal scandal. It'll be this song. But this is a celebration of Father's Day and all the bad jokes that dads say. This is Kevin Boyce, Feet Kings. This song goes out to all the bicycles out there who can't stand on their own

Because they're too tired Yeah, we're telling dad jokes Oh yeah What, what? Yeah, we're telling dad jokes Alright, Mr. King, tell us some more dad jokes At 2.30 you were sentenced to go to the dentist How was your trip?

I guess I'll see you next fall I'm hiding in your wardrobe, it's none of your business My cat is sick, you know it's not feeling well Can I watch the TV? Yeah, but don't turn it on At the cemetery, they're dying to get in real bad How far away is dinner? It's just in the kitchen

Dad, I'm hungry Hi, hungry I'm dead You were telling dad jokes You were telling dad jokes You were telling You were telling You were telling You were tellin' Dad jokes You were tellin' You were you were tellin'

You were tellin' You were tellin' Did you know tails are the leading cause of dry skin? Must be a frog in my throat With that croak Steak puns are a rare Meaty, um, well done There's a restaurant on the moon with no atmosphere Just like a bald man, I'm outta here

Now, Forrest Gump's password's one, Forrest, one What did the mountain climber name his son? Cliff What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing It just waved I'm just a dad Doing all we can to be a better man Keeping a deadpan Just a dad

Just a dad Just a dad. Just a dad. Just a dad. You're a good dad, John. Dracula's a pain in the neck. You're a good dad, John. Velcro. What a rip-off.

Let's hear it for the rad folks making all the dad jokes. One line of bad jokes Making people mad stoked One time for the puns Told by the parents who aren't our mum Russian dolls are so full of themselves I'm on a seafood diet I see food and I eat it I eat it

Jono and Ben just like family the family members you're ashamed of but it's Sunday as Sunday Father's Day that's what we like to say

in New Zealand right and we want I was going to ask you as a challenge to try and get through the whole show without referencing it

but you know 6 6.15am we've already done it yeah well I started with the weird this is Friday

sort of thing it was odd. Got into the days of the week. I don't know why I got there. So I ended up having to say Father's Day Sunday. We'll edit it out in post. Oh, we're live, aren't we? It's Father's Day on Sunday and

do you like Father's Day? Yeah, yeah. I'm a father, you're a father. This is interesting. Do you guys like father's day i'm indifferent i saw an ad last night it was like spare a thought for all the fathers this sunday i guess you can but i'm not like you know christmas is my big banger yeah if you want to come through with you know if i'm putting weight on presents yeah this is just i haven't got an advent calendar counting down to father's Day, really,

with little chocolates. To be honest, I think probably Mother's Day is more of an event, and so it should be. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just really love it when the kids will usually make a card or something like that. It's nice, you know? Yeah, but do you keep the card? What have you done with those homemade cards?

No, I do keep the homemade... You throw out your cards. No, yeah, yeah, I do. The card. But not the kids. The kids are the ones... If they're good. If they're good, they're okay.

If they're good. If they put some effort into it, they get to keep. They get a keepsake little folder. You can definitely tell if it's been a rush job five minutes before the present gifting. They know it too. It's not your best work. Look at this. Compare this to 2019. You were focused

here. This is just done at a scribble and bi 2019. You were focused here. This is just done in a scribble and biro. No thought or love gone into it. So we wanted to play a game, speaking of love. It's the Love You game, where we would phone both of our fathers, Kevin Boyce and John Pryor, and just drop the Love You bomb. And then once we've said that, we set a timer to see how long it takes them to say love you back. Now, traditionally, this generation, not that open with saying I love you.

I don't want to stereotype the whole generation. I was confident my dad would buck that trend. I was like, you know, he'll, you know. Kevin Boyce is an I love you guy. Yeah, but when you hear this, I made a call. He was a little hesitant. Well, you just threw him off. You threw him. Have a listen.

Here was my attempt with my dad saying I love you. Hello, Kevin Boyce. Hey, Dad, it's Ben. How's it going? G'day, how are you? Not too bad, not too bad. You all good? Yeah, pretty good.

Yeah, good. Just doing a bit of work and other bits and pieces. Yeah, thank you very much. Oh, nice. Hey, just a quick ring to say I love you. Oh, thank you. Yeah, hey. Thank you very much. Is that, okay, do you want to say anything back or is that just how we're going to end it?

What's that, sorry? You don't want to say anything back? or is that just how we're going to end it? What's that, sorry? You don't want to say anything back? I'd love you to. I'd really love you to. There we go. There we go. Absolutely unequivocally. Oh, look.

Yeah, but you took a while. It's John O's year as well. We're doing our Father's Day game. We'll see how quickly our dads will say I love you back. 15 seconds on the clock there, KB. You took the compliment, and you bathed in the compliment for a bit and I was like come on mate get to return.

Yeah and Jono did you enjoy your card? Oh I got a card I'm bringing it in for you there's a special card from your dad sent a card I was all this way excited and it's a card for Jono. Hang on try that again Jono say I love you. I love you KB you really do mate. Thank you very much and I'll take back say I love you. I love you, KB.

You really do, mate. Thank you very much. And I'll take back what I had in the card. Did you see it? No, I haven't seen the card. No, I need you to bring it in. Yeah, well. Okay, good.

I was looking along there and just something said Jono. Absolutely. And it was under the J section here. I was talking to some people yesterday. Hang on. I was talking to some people yesterday. I was talking to yesterday to new people in New Plymouth and they brought up this little thing that we did three years ago.

You give Kevin a bit of air time. He wants to fill the dead air. He doesn't want to return back and I love you, but anyway. He did eventually. He did eventually. What about Jose? I love you. No, he's really going for okay. We're going to... I love you. No, he's really gone.

All right, we'll call you later. All right. Okay, cheers, mate. Goodbye. See you, Kevin. Love you both. Love you, mate. Love you, mate.

See you, bud. All the best. Cheers, bye. Geez, he loves to chat. He does. He does. He loves to chat. You're always like...

You can never go live with Kevin. You said you've always got to pre-record Kevin. You can't go live. You were talking about me worrying about things before. Jeez. Okay. Okay, so that was my time to beat you. He was a little hesitant on the I love you, wasn't he?

You didn't get an immediate return volley on that one, did you? You had to get your Clark Gayford on, do a little bit of fishing. But he came through. He came through. Can Jono beat it next with his dad, John? The I Love You game with our dads for Father's Day in a few moments on the hits. Your essential listening for non-essential banter.

I thought I was saying something meaningful there, and then I backed out. Jono and Ben, New Zealand breakfast. In the middle of a game that we're playing, the Love You game, where both Ben and myself had to phone our fathers yesterday and drop the Love You. We started a timer after we said Love You game where both Ben and myself had to phone our fathers yesterday and drop the Love You. We started a timer after

we said Love You and the timer kept running until they said Love You back. You just had Kevin Boyce with a 15 second time that he said already. Good pace? I was expecting a bit more but I guess he kind of basked in the I Love You from me for a bit

long for the radio competition. He just said it and you could tell in his voice, he's like, well, that was weird. It was odd, but I like it. Thank you. I'll take it. Yeah. Odd timing. It was, yeah.

So now John Pryor, my father, who, you know, he's an ex-Air Force and he doesn't say many words, John Pryor. So I, going into this, wasn't expecting huge things. Also the fact that he doesn't love you too. It's probably the biggest problem. Playing against you. I'm kidding, I'm kidding. He approaches the love you the same way that I approach people with clipboards on the street. He just ignores it.

Just ignores it. So yeah, this is my attempt to see if I can beat Ben Boyce's time. Hello? Annie, how are you? Who's that? Who's that? Oh, it's Barry. Who?

Who's that? You've only got one. It's lovely to hear from you Yeah right Well you still haven't said my name I'm still concerned you don't know who you're talking to It's Jonathan Yes well done One from one for Andy Pryor there

Yeah But however how are you? Why are you ringing me? Why am I ringing you? I'm ringing you to tell you I love you firstly Yes Okay you don't want I love you firstly? Yes. Okay, you don't want to say anything back?

I text you and say love, Jonathan. I'm not going to publicly tell, obviously, everybody I love you. You don't want to publicly let the public know of that, no. No. So this has been a shocking warm-up game for the game that I have to play. Is John Boy around? Yes, he is. Just a moment, love. All right. Thank you.

Not a good start. Not public. Not public. Barry. It was Barry. It was Barry. Not like she really wanted Barry to call, not you. Yeah, no.

It's always disappointing when it's not Barry. Every time I phone them, Barry? No, it's still not Barry. Barry had to call. Hello, Barry? Damn not Barry. Yeah, Barry would be cool. Hello, Jerry? Johnny boy. How are you? How are you, my friend?

What are you doing? I'm fiddling with the computer at the moment. Oh, fiddling with the computer. Well, listen, Father's Day on Sunday. Yeah. Love you, mate. Oh, thank you for that. Is it a ticking time bomb or something? Yeah, no, love you. There's a timer going there for some reason. I wonder why the timer would be

going down there. Is this one of your tricks? Yeah, I said I love you. Timer started. What would happen? What would the timer be running for? Probably an explosion No, not an explosion Timer's really ticking down here, John boy I said I love you

And generally what do people do in return? Well, they say I love you too. Yeah, they do. They do. They do. Somewhat reluctantly, but there you go there. It wasn't from him, it was what they say. They say I love you too. That's what they would say. Hey, John boy, happy Father's Day, mate. All right, thank you, Jay. Did you get the voucher? I did, yeah. Thanks very much. Actually, they got him a voucher for the restaurant that we went to with them, Ben, the pizza restaurant.

That's a lovely, lovely spot. Mediterranean. Shout out to the Mediterranean, then. In fact, I only got some pizzas from yesterday. Oh, you're bragging about your takeaways. Oh, you're back to level three, aren't you? Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, good. We can't have pizza here, John. You've got to earn it. Yeah, we're bragging about your takeaways. Oh, you're back to level three, aren't you? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, good. We can't have pizza here, John. You've got to earn it. Yeah, we've got to earn it. We've got to behave ourselves in Auckland. Oh, look after yourself, mate, and happy Father's Day. Alright, thanks for that. Alright, love you. Cheers, everybody. Again. Nothing, nothing. So you didn't quite

know the time that I did. It was a minute ten on the clock. So well done, Ben. Your dad loves you more than my dad loves me. And your mum won't say it publicly to you either. I love that. Not publicly. Not publicly. She's not publicly.

She made you walk in front of her. Ten metres away. I've always wondered that. When their friends came over, I had to hide in a cupboard. He's like Harry Potter. Happy our father's day to all the dads on Sunday. It is the hurts you got Jono and Ben

Hard-hitting interviews and informed opinion by Kosking on New Salted Bean In the meantime here's Jono and Ben The Heads Have you been paying attention back on TV tonight

on TV2 and we do this every Friday From across the world From across the globe This is an international news update From across the world. From across the globe. This is an international news update with Ursula Carlson. That's right, we do have the one and only Ursula Carlson from Have You Been Paying Attention? joining us every Friday with international news,

which turns out to be not that international. No. She's the only international part of it. That's what you claim is hers. Well, I mean, that is international. So, you know, if we're going for facts and, you know, you're in media, we don't want to have fake news. So this is all factual then.

And last time when Ben called you out on the international part of international news, he was labelled a racist. And so that kind of shut down the whole. Yeah, that really handbrakes most of it. Yeah, true. I'm not going to go there. Yeah. Shut down the whole. Yeah. That really handbrakes most of it. Yeah. I'm not going to go there. Although I would like to go there with a question here, a hard-hitting question, Ursula, if I could.

Now, Ursula or Ursula, because I've heard it said multiple ways by different people, and we've known you for many years. I'm like, oh, my God, have I been saying it wrong? Am I saying it right? I mean, how do you say it? I'm so confused. I don't even know.

All right, here we go. Here's a clean slate. No one talk. I'm going to say it. Okay. Everyone listen. All right. On three. Three, two, one. Ursula. Ursula. Oh, I've been calling you. There we go. Yeah, well, Jono, you've been going with the Ursula. And then I call you Urs. Yeah, I'm not throwing you out on the bus yet, but I'm just very confused right now. That's right. And Yeah, I'm not throwing you out on the bus yet, but I'm just very confused right now. It's all right. And honestly, I honestly don't care how people say my name. I'll respond to anything.

It's just a name. I know. And if you were one of those people that was a bit upset about your name being mispronounced, it would just become the bane of your life. No, honestly, there's way bigger things in my life I can worry about. Getting my name right is the least of my worries. As long as you're being nice to me, you can call me whatever you like.

Yeah, well, actually, speaking of that, we actually are on Have You Been Paying Attention Tonight. We're going to come along as guest quizmasters. And we didn't realize it was just going to be like a mockery, a roasting of Jono and Ben. Well, normally, we treat our guest quizmasters really nice. We're very respectful. We're very kind. We're giving, you know, but I mean, when you two show up and you dress like bananas and pizamas, you guys dress the same. You're sort of opening the door and giving us a stick.

Yeah, no, it did turn into the comedy roast of John and Ben. Over Zoom. You just had to take it on the chin. I muted you for like 20 minutes in one stage. No, you didn't. We could see your tears, mate. At one point, we had to turn the screen to black just with our names on it because we were crying. Turn off the video.

Yeah, we're Zoom dead on that. What I didn't notice before, because I've known you boys for quite a long time now, slowly you are morphing into twin brothers. Your heads are even starting to be the same shape. Like, of course one of you has a massive noggin. I'm not saying this is me, that's not you.

But it's like, holy! I looked at you with your head pads on and I'm like yep I can picture someone giving birth to you too We're like stepbrothers And the roast has now spilled off Back onto our own show Okay alright let's get back to

It's a great show tonight from what we saw Apart from the mockery of us Have you been paying attention on TVNZ2 But you're looking at some international, well, are you looking at international news for us? I am looking. I'm going to start off with international news. Something that we have covered on our show last week,

and I think we touched on it this week. I blacked out a little bit because I had too much sugar during the show. But during lockdown, and like it's a global thing, so there's people everywhere. And the talented people are locked up so we've had opera singers and a violinist now this week singing and performing for their neighbors and they're usually in apartments and then they during the day at some point they'll go out and then they'll just go sing or perform and and you know I mean that's

great and if you're really into it that's awesome But I just imagine Half of the people in the apartments around you Going oh here's that guy Shut up that opera singer Or what if you've got a baby Then you just put down and here comes Pavarotti out on the balcony Chill out dude

Not everyone's into it It's great for the social videos But you're right there's other people to factor in. I saw a violinist who's doing Metallica on his violin in Wellington. Yeah, that's a double. Like, I don't like Metallica or violin. How is your lockdown going? Because I know you do enjoy being, you're a homebody.

I am. I'm very much a homebody. I go and drop stuff off at the community pantry, and then I post it on social, so I feel like I'm a good person. But then I just stay home. I cook. I bake. I avoid peanuts.

I'm like my grandmother in the 1950s. Did you say you avoid peanuts or the other word I'm thinking of? No, peanuts. Oh, but you do. Okay. or the other word I'm thinking of? No, penis. Oh, penis. Okay. Yeah, no, I do. I mean, I'll see what it does to my friends. It makes them swell up and then children pop out.

There's no EpiPen for that. Ursula Carlson, we love your international news updates. Thank you very much. You can catch Have You Been Paying Attention Tonight, TVNZ2, and you keep safe. Thank you. You guys too. New Zealand's Breakfast. This is

Jono and Ben on the hits. Good morning. Welcome along to the show. We got to Friday, New Zealand. Here we go, Friday. Welcome you with open arms from a safe social distance. We'll do one of those weird ear hugs. Oh, yeah.

When was the last time you shook a hand? Jeez, I can't remember the last time I shook a hand. I know. I mean, it would be a few weeks ago now, wouldn't it? Yeah. And who knows when? You know, we're here in Level 4, the rest of the country, not in Level 4. So who knows when the next handshake will be? Haven't been elbowing as much.

You know how you used to do the old elbow bumps? Yeah, I saw James Corden and Lorde the other night when Lorde was performing on The Late Late Show in America. They did that. They did an elbow bump. They did an elbow bump. So I guess they're still bringing that in over there. It's still cool.

It's still cool. We quickly forgot about the elbow bump last year, didn't we? We just went straight back to rubbing each other's faces. We really did. Yeah, but we had six months and pretty much six months in the end of gloating. Of no COVID and gloating. Yeah, you're right. So we got, you know, we got

after all sorts of nonsense during those six months. Nonsense? You got up to a northern base, Julia. I know. Imagine you wouldn't get up to that nonsense now. No, never. Few weeks time though, you'll be back out. Yeah, I'm frothing. We've got a big show today. $5,000 up

for grabs. We're rewarding another lockdown legend as well. I really, really like doing that. And we want to basically hook up some dads for Father's Day. It is Father's Day on Sunday. It's going to be a bit of a different Father's Day for many dads around New Zealand. And we've got some pretty cool prizes for you to win. After seven, it is the hits. We'll start things off with Kelly Clarkson 605. Father's Day for many dads around New Zealand. And we've got some pretty cool prizes for you to win after seven.

It is the hits. We'll start things off with Kelly Clarkson, 605. Going hard and ooley. Go hard, go ooley. Go hard and ooley. Hard and ooley. Go hard. With Jono and Ben.

New Zealand's breakfast. One of your popular character traits on the program, Ben, is being the show warrior. Yeah. That's great. It's a good little character trait. We have a bit of fun with the anxiety. It's probably quite mean on the surface, Ben, as being the show worrier. That's great. It's a good little character trait. We have a bit of fun with the anxiety. It's probably quite mean on the surface, isn't it?

We make fun of Ben's anxiety. I do a lot. I'm okay with it. Are you okay with this? I do say to you guys, you know, it's one of my things. I do like to, you know, to worry about things. Not like to. I do.

I just worry about it. I'd rather not. It's not a hobby. Hey, I could do some more work. I've got another hour of worrying. I could probably put a few more things in to worry about. But I'm starting to worry. I'm starting to worry that I'm becoming a worrier. Oh, yeah.

And I think it's one of those moments, you know, it's a turning point in your life. You're like, oh, now I'm here in life. I didn't used to be quite as bad. But then, obviously, you're right. You get older. You get more responsibilities. I had a few things that happened in life. I didn't used to be quite as bad. But then obviously you're right. You get older, you get more responsibilities. I had a few things that happened in life that kind of made you start to worry and think about consequences and things like that a lot more than you do. You do. And now I'm worrying about my parents' health.

And they care less about their health than I do now. And that's, I find, a big turning point. Have you had the vaccine yet? Well, we'll get it, Jay, don't worry. It's like, yeah, I find that concerning. It's like the tables have turned. They used to worry about me all the time. Now I'm worrying about them.

Life's just full of worry. Yeah, well, welcome to hanging out with me too long and finally taking on after me. It's like when you text your dad, Kevin Boyce, who we're actually about to phone very shortly for Father's Day. We did some calls yesterday to both of our fathers. But you text Kevin Boyce, you'll text him, you know, a Lord of the Rings-style novel text,

and he'll just come back with K. Yeah, or a thumbs up. Or a thumbs up emoji. He loves the thumbs up emoji. Yeah. What I find also about worrying about stuff as well, everyone's always got these little sayings. Now and again, my mum will send me a little saying, you know, like a about what you know worrying about stuff as well everyone's always got these little sayings now and again my mum will send me a little saying you know like a little you know

and they're great on the surface uh you know not 97 of the things you worry about won't happen things like that i'm like you're great but it doesn't still stop you from you know yeah worrying about today will ruin you today and you know and you tomorrow you know yeah i get it but it's still not you know what i quite like that probably won't help, but worrying means you suffer twice. And I was like, that is a goodie. But again, it doesn't stop you from worrying. That's right, yeah.

Put it on a tea towel. Put it on an apron. I mean, great sayings, but it still doesn't take away. Don't worry about things you can't change. But I am, okay? I am, and they don't end up changing, but I still worry about them. So how do I not worry about the things? That's what I want to build out onto.

Prescription medication. Just take a lot of it. Just coast through life. As we talked about, it is Father's Day this weekend. We want to play a wee game with our dads shortly and see if our dads will come through And profess their love for us Yeah We recorded this yesterday

Because obviously it's very early in the morning But funny results Very funny results Unexpected results Very shortly it is the hits You've got Jono and Ben Another day at home with the kids Little tip

It's called parenting Not babysitting Jono and Ben New Zealand's breakfast A lot of people Because it's been in lockdown Well it is It's a lot of people, because it's been in lockdown. Well, it is. It's lockdown. Level 3, Level 4 is lockdown all around New Zealand. Turning to screens. Screens.

And I imagine screen time is up a lot. Now, this is a lovely, gentle segue into an intervention that we want to hold with a member of the team, Ben. You eased in there, like, saying it was everyone's problem. But we know it's one person's problem the team, Ben. You eased in there like saying it was everyone's problem, but we know it's one person's problem. I'll sprinkle some topical news in there as well. In China at the moment, for those under the age of 18, they're only allowed three hours of video games. It's the law now, per week.

Per week? Per week, and they've got set times. You're allowed to play video games between 8 and 9 on Fridays, weekends, public holidays. Outside that, the Chinese government said no more videos. Too much train time. That's some pretty harsh sanctions, but that's what they're doing. They get results, the commies, eh?

They really do. They do. It's a controversial political system, but I tell you what, they get results. They run efficient. Now I've said that's the extreme that people are going to. Now we can talk about what we need to talk about. Yeah, you've done well, Ben. You've made it a worldwide problem,

domestic problem, and now we're going to zero in even further to a studio problem, producer Julia. Our little work child, producer Julia. We are concerned about your screen time. The other week, just in a passing comment, which we both discussed behind your back, you mentioned your screen time,

your daily screen time was sitting at what? Average over the week was six and a half hours a day a day now this is for the same person that came back from outward bound without their phone and said you know what technology i'm not gonna use it she went bush i don't need my phone yeah it's a detoxing year this is what i'm gonna do and now you're at six hours i know but i blame lockdown when i bored, I just go on my phone. You know how people do dry July? I was considering doing no Instagram August, but then I decided that was a really bad idea.

Because you want to get bored. What did Jonah Hill say? The actor Jonah Hill said it was like the cigarettes of our generation. It's so addictive. You should just take up smoking. It'd be easy to manage. You're almost doing a full work day on your cell phone. I know.

But you've also got a full-time job. I know. But to be fair, your job does involve a lot of... A bit of social media, you know? It does. Yeah, let's place the blame on that. The lines blur between, you know, your work and non-work when it comes to that. And like if I were to give up Instagram, for example,

I technically wouldn't be able to give it up fully because I need to access the hits breakfast Instagram, you know? Yeah, do that. Hot fire Instagram. You need to get that. Yeah, so it's a bit of a situation. My wife Amanda, because our daughters have got, you know, they've got an iPad or, you know, things that they use.

And so now she's set like a time limit on it. I have that too. Like a screen time time limit. And it stops after they get to a certain thing. But then I just hit ignore every time. Well, now they have to enter a password, but I'm the weak link get to a certain thing. But then I just hit ignore every time. Well, now they have to give me a password, but I'm the weak link in the chain. They'll come up and go, hey, Dad, you know, like,

can you put the password in? Yeah, and they'll give me a little story. And I haven't been there the whole day because I've been at work. I'll be like, yeah, it sounds justified enough. And away I go. And I'm the weak link. And they'll let me know. Hey, I thought they'd be using it.

I was like, oh, yeah, they said they'd done this thing. It's a school related. It's a correct limb and all sorts of. They know how to work it. I'm the weak link in the chain. They know how to play you, don't you? They divide and conquer those kids. Do you know, ironically, what did you say yours was? Six and a half.

I've been sitting here all high and mighty. Oh, dear. Judging, trying to stereotype the younger generations. I'm at seven hours, 54 minutes. Oh, my gosh. Wow. I don't even generations. I'm at seven hours, 54 minutes. Oh my God. Wow. I don't even know what I'm watching. What is the majority of it spent on?

And that is down 13% from last week. I'm doing all right. Two hours, 54 minutes. You're doing well. That's down 17. I do get lost in it. Instagram, I'm a shocker for that. Like sometimes I'll go into a room to do something,

and then I'll get fine, and I'll find myself five minutes later and go, this is not why I came into the room. I didn't come in the room to sit down and watch Instagram. Why am I watching an advertorial on how to get my glutes tighter on Instagram? Put it down, Ben. Come on, give yourself a look. Put yourself together. Come in here to do the washing.

Seven hours. That must be. I'm putting the kids on. That's the kids. Oh, but they've got their own nose. No, no. Seven hours. That must be. I'm putting the kids on. That's the kids. But they've got their own no. No, no. Seven hours. This is one of those classic Jono Pryorisms.

You guys getting these ads that are getting pushed towards you? These ads for this and proving it work? I'm like, no. So let's chuck this over. Four, four, eight, seven. Can anyone beat producer Juliet or myself? As it turns out. Maybe the intervention should have been for me.

Seven hours. Can you beat seven hours, 54 minutes of screen time during this lockdown period? 4487 on the text. Love to hear from you on New Zealand's Breakfast. Spy. No WhatsApp. Spy.co.nz. Time now for your hourly update on how the rich and famous are handling life.

Juliet, what's happening in Spy? So, Joe Rogan, I know him as the successful podcaster, but didn't he do something else? Yes, he did a couple of things. He was the original host of Fair Factor, which was a big show for a while. I was like, fair is not a factor for you. So he's the original host of that. He's also really heavily involved

in the UFC, if you're a fan of that. He's a commentator. I think he did a bit of it back in the day. But yeah, and he also does a hugely successful podcast. Oh my goodness, I know. It's crazy. The top podcast in the world, right? He gets all the guests, all the big stars joining him on the podcast. It's like a three-hour episode. And they all just smoke weed through it as well.

Yeah. He's a big advocate for that. Yeah. NZ and me, our parent company, they would frown upon that if we did that every morning. Yeah, true. We wouldn't get away with that sort of nonsense here on The Hitch. No, no. So Joe Rogan, in the past, he's been quite controversial with vaccinations and COVID.

He's in the past discouraged young people from getting the vaccine because he says if you're young and fit, you don't need to worry about getting COVID. But obviously it's not the case because, I mean, right now, all of, not all, sorry, majority of the active cases in New Zealand are relatively young people. Listen, Joe Rogan, I love Joe Rogan. He does a wonderful job, but I don't know if I'm going to listen to a guy sitting there smoking weed. Totally. About whether I need a vaccination. So very ironically, he has contracted COVID.

And if you're a medical professional currently listening, please block your ears because he is treating it with a horse drug that has been widely discouraged. Ketamine. Not diketamine. Not ketamine. It's one I can't really pronounce. It does sound like he was. Imagine that. I'm just taking cake and forgetting everything.

But yeah, he's using something that is not recommended by the medical professionals at all. And it's quite concerning because you've got such a big audience that if he, you know, says this. Remember Trump did the same thing. Not with a horse tranquilizer, but when he had it, he got injected with, says this. Remember Trump did the same thing, not with a horse cranked visor, but when he had it, he got injected with some experimental thing.

Yeah. And he came back and goes, I feel great. It's like I'm a super, super human now. I'm great. I'd encourage everyone to have COVID and do the, you're like, what? What are you saying?

I remember he was like walking up the steps of the warehouse going, I know he's wheezing and stuff. He's like, I'm great, I feel great. Oh, I kind of miss Trump's antics in a way. You know, he's wheezing and stuff. He's like, oh, great, I feel great. Oh, I kind of miss Trump's antics in a way. You know, he gives some great yarns. And the final season of The Ellen Show is airing in a little over a week, and some of the big banger guests have been announced for the season.

Jennifer Aniston, she was the show's very first guest on The Ellen Show back in 2003. So she's going to be on it. Jimmy Kimmel, Kim Kardashian, Imagine Dragons and Tiffany Haddish. There'll be a full vaccinated audience for the first time since the pandemic hit. And so it's the final season, season 19 for old Ellen.

And it'll probably be a real good one. She's going to be reminiscing on all of the guests. All of the evil things she's done over the years. Oh, that Tom I bullied, the poor production assistant backstage. Oh dear. We watch a lot of Ellen Oh, they tell my bullies the poor production assistant backstage. Oh dear. No, we watch a lot of Ellen that happens to play after the show finishes on TV.

She hasn't been hosting the show for, it feels like a year. She's got the poor DJ out there, the poor DJ guy who she is dancing for every day. He's really cool though. He's cool. DJ, is it Twitch or Switch? Oh yeah, Twitch. That's right. Poor guy. He's coming out and doing the show on his own. He's dancing by himself. Hosting the show by himself. He's just the one

man band. Just holding the whole thing together. Give the gig to poor Twitch. Well yeah, maybe he'll take over. He might get it. He could get it. And that is your Spy Update. For more you can head to the hits.co.nz After 7 o'clock we want to hook up some dads because it is Father's Day. As well as that, we want to hook up someone who's been a lockdown legend. If you know someone who's helping keep the country moving during this very difficult time,

you can head to the hitstockco.nz. From a socially distantly safe two metres, stay away. This is New Zealand's Breakfast with Jono and Ben. It's Jono and Ben. Of course, yesterday announced 42 new cases of COVID. Auckland, the only place in New Zealand that is in level four, but there are many people out there that

are keeping our country moving and we want to reward one of them right now. You guys are legends. Jono and Ben's ISO Legends. Thanks to Skinny. Do they name like, are they going to be like, we're going to name 40 supermarkets

as locations of interest? I didn't even know there were 40 supermarkets in New Zealand. Well, now they've also said, because I think originally if you were there at the time of someone that maybe had COVID that you had to isolate. Now they've just said,

just monitor your symptoms because they don't feel that they're as close to contacts now. Yeah, and even if you do have symptoms symptoms we'll put you in a isolation facility and you can try and escape at 1am in the morning if you want to you can get out if you try hard enough godspeed now the iso legend this is a wonderful heartfelt moment of the show almost as heartfelt as the moment that ben told me that he'd hook up with me if he was really desperate. That melted my heart, Ben. Yeah, thanks our mates at Skinny.

We want to reward a lockdown legend, someone that's been doing wonderful things for New Zealand and want to hook them up with a pretty epic prize. Yeah, and these people are nominated too by Friends and Fano, which gets you much-needed brownie points too, doesn't it? This sort of thing. I don't even know what brownie points are. Hello, Kate speaking. But, doesn't it? This sort of thing. I don't even know what brownie points are. Hello, Kate speaking.

But, Kate. Hello. It's Jono and Ben from The Hits here. Oh my gosh. Okay. What are we calling about? You don't sound so stoked to talk to us. Shenanigans are about to happen here, Kate. Yeah, you guys are trouble. You're on the radio, Kate.

You're on the radio. Really? Yeah. That's a lot to take in at an early hour. Now, this is actually a really good reason we're calling. Really? Yeah, you've been nominated by Anna. And she says you're a very humble person, but you've been working so hard as an essential worker. While the rest of New Zealand has pretty much been in lockdown,

or a lot of New Zealand, you've been out there. What do you do for a job? I'm a veterinary nurse. A vet nurse? A vet nurse, because of course the animals don't have to. Well, the animals still get sick and need attention, don't they? They do. It's quite tough.

Can they get COVID? No, they can't get COVID, but we still have to be in full lockdown at work. So we have to basically take the animals off the owners at the door and then be in full PPE. Oh my God, are you busy? Yeah, it's very busy. Well, we want to reward you for all the great work and say thank you for everything you're doing. Thanks our friends at Skinny, we want to hook you up with a $500 pack and save voucher. Oh my God. And six months Skinny credit as well, you can have those just to say thank you so much for everything you're doing.

It hasn't gone unnoticed. Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much. No worries. I mean, you're a bit cagey at the top of this. Yeah. You know, it's a change, Jono and Ben. You know, back in the day, we would have said, oh, your dog's died.

But now we're handing out a supermarket voucher. I mean, lovely. Oh, thank you so much. I really feel for all the guys working up in Auckland who are still being in the lockdown, level four. Yeah. Where are you? Whereabouts are you, sorry?

We're in Wellington. Oh, you're in Wellington. I mean, still, you know, level threes are still essentially a lockdown, though, isn't it, for you? Yeah. You can just shove a burger in your face. Well, if the late, great Sir Edmund Hillary was still alive today, I don't even think he would win

the supermarket voucher for pack and save. No, he would have to pack and pay because, Kate, you've been an absolute legend. Yeah, thanks, Anna, for nominating me. No worries. I don't know why I'm saying that. Taking the credit for Anna. Keep safe, and thank you so much for all

you're doing, right? Thank you. Thanks so much, guys. And if you want to nominate someone, I think we're continuing to do this next week. No, ongoing negotiations on that front. Oh, okay. I'm driving a hard bargain. They're pushing back. I'm pushing back.

Yeah, there's a bit of backing. Everyone's on board with it. Everyone loves it, though, right? Yeah, we all love it. Yeah, I've just been in a go. I'm just going, I'll continue on the negotiation. Leave it with me. Okay, well, right now, thanks so much to our mates at Skiddy. We all love it. I'm just going to continue on the negotiation. Leave it with me. All right, now.

Thanks so much to our mates at Skiddy. Skiddy, they're helping their capped wireless broadband customers get through lockdown with free data. You can get 60 gigabytes of data. That's a whole lot to all their capped wireless broadband customers. They'll enjoy that. Actually, you know what would help the negotiation process? If you just say it is coming back next week, it puts a bit of pressure on there.

I was trying to do that. Yeah, definitely back Monday morning. Hits.co.nz. It is the hits. From the socially distantly safe two metres. Stay away. This is New Zealand's Breakfast with Jono and Ben. Now, Jono, you sent an email yesterday.

We had a little bit of email correspondence after the show, didn't we, Producer Juliet? She got the ball rolling with an email or something. Both of us replied back to it, but I'd just like to look at your reply right now and just do a bit of an email breakdown yeah no worries listen can I just front foot this obviously this isn't going to be favorable I don't know what it is but I'm gathering if it's turned into radio content it's not going to paint a favorable light on my email it's not it's just it's just it's cryptic we just we're all just a bit confused we've been talking about this morning like what do you mean we both of us read the email and we're like and then but we didn't reply back i'm kind of like kanye in that regard so mysterious what does this mean so julia emailed back uh emailed

something i emailed back and then you email going yeah mate for sure not weird at all would love you in bird jew is what you said and that's it and you send all that back would love you in bird, Jew, is what you said. And that's it. And you send all that back. Would love you in bird. Is that just not clear enough? Is that not? And then both of us this morning when you were out and the thing, you're going, what do you mean by the bird?

Yeah. I don't know. I guess we're all trying to work it out when you type it in. You're like, what did that autocorrect do? What was he doing? It's a bit like Boss Todd. Like Boss Todd, if you're listening. Don't put me in the same email category as Boss Todd. You're saying it was in the WhatsApp as well.

You're replying to things from four days ago. You know, you can actually reply back to the thing that you want to reply back on. I've seen other people do that. I appreciate it. I do see other people do that and I'm like, that's great, that's great. Because you get it all in one package. You're like, you see what they're referencing? Yes. And then you see their response.

Very good. I won't lie, I've wanted to do that. Otherwise you get your thing and you're like, what is he replying to? Yeah, you've got to scroll back four days and get into it. When it comes to email, I let the computer do, you know, at least 60% of the heavy lifting.

Like a Tesla. Yeah, that's right. You've got to trust the technology or else why it's there. So I just type stuff in and sometimes it may correct to words that aren't necessarily what I'm wanting to say, but then I leave it in the receiver's hands

to decipher the email. And that's the joy of it, isn't it? It's the thrill of getting an email from me. Do you not reread your emails that you type? No, no, I just bang them out. Bang them out. Bang, they're gone. Yesterday you sent one and you're like, oh.

Yesterday I want to get like, I weren't meant to send that thing to someone. You sent a whole parody song and we work it on to someone else. At five in the morning too. You're like, oh, that wasn't meant to go. That wasn't meant to go. No, this is why I'm a big backer of the suck back feature, too.

You wouldn't read it, though. You wouldn't know it. Now until we bring it up, we're like, we'd love you in bird. Did you even know you'd sent that until we brought it up now? No, I'm trying to figure out. When you read it back to me, I'm trying to think what I was referencing. We're trying to work out what you're referencing. I would love you in birds.

I'll put you in the Boss Todd category. You are in the Boss Todd category. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, it would have been, I would love you involved. You know, figure it out. I would love you involved. Really?

Well, do you know the previous email correspondence? Just connect the dots. Like, what's he reading? Oh, yeah, no. Okay, so I've asked this. He's come back, would love you in birds. It must be, would love you involved Oh, yeah, no. Okay, so I've asked this. He's come back, would love you in birds. Must be, would love you in volg. Surely it's obvious.

Okay. Don't put it out. This isn't all on me. It clearly is all on you. Hey, next, we want to hook up some dads for Father's Day. We've got Cooey Price. Thanks to the New Zealand Herald. We're going to give you also a chance to give your dads a bit of a shout-out on national radio. We'll do that in a few years.

Well, not national radio. That's a better station. But on our radio show that goes right around New Zealand. National league speaker. Rise and shine. Time to start the, who are we kidding? When are the both of you? Jono and Ben, the hits.

It is the hits, Jono and Ben, on your Friday morning. Now, it is Father's Day on Sunday, and we wanted to reward some dads in a pretty strange time right now. Advertise your great dad now with the Dadvertising line. Call now, 0800 THE HITS, for a limited time only. That's right, Dadvertising. Now, this is not in like a you're selling your dad like a human trafficking sort of scenario. Although that could be profitable for us.

But you just phone up and you just tell us why your dad's so great. You dadvertise your dad, put him out there. That's like saying happy Father's Day to your dad. Give him a bit of a shout out. One thing that you may in particular you really love about your dad. And you can do that on the radio as well. And we've got, thanks to the New Zealand Herald, some premium digital subscriptions for dads as well,

so you can get three months of the Herald online, which is pretty awesome. Okay, so I'll do some dadvertising now for John Pryor. Wonderful man, John Pryor. He goes out on his street in Christchurch and mows all the berms, all of the berms of the street. Wow. He looks raving mad, but he does it. He mows everyone's booms. Okay, that's good.

I'll put the advertising out for my dad, Kevin Boyce. As I say, he's wonderful. Love him. And he's an entertainer. He's an entertainer. He carries around in his wallet a list of 100 songs that he can play on guitar. And so at any moment, if you want to hear any songs,

he will weigh out that list, and you'll know you're in for a long night as soon as he pulls out that list. Is it like a jukebox scenario where people go through the list and pick a fave? Oh, yeah. They'll be like, yep, we've got to go in here. I want that one from Simon and Gump. I want that one from the Beatles. He'll be like, all right, here I go.

And as a kid, you're like, oh, here we go. It's going to be at 3 o'clock in the morning. Does he get through all 100? Oh, if he wants. If you want him to, he will. And even if you don't want them to, he will. Once he gets started. So this is how dadvertising works.

Just phone up, brag about your dad. 0800 the hits the telephone number. And as Ben said, we've got some New Zealand Herald premium subscriptions. You're going to be a better reader of the Herald than the other schmucks like us. You're going to be premium. You get all those premium articles to read, which is pretty cool. Just don't get the first three lines and it blurs out. We'll do that next.

So, under the hoods. The show where the masks make them look a whole lot better. Can't save this battered up old face. It makes you beautiful. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. You're on the hoods, Jono and Ben. It is Father's Day on Sunday, and we wanted to give you a chance to advertise your dad

and give him a shout-out on radio, because it's hard right now to get presents sent around New Zealand or around the country at various levels of lockdown. But it does play into the hands of those that forgot to get their dad a present as well. This is a wonderful time to blame COVID. COVID can actually get you out of some sticky situations. It's got a lot of bad points, but boy, oh boy.

Advertise your great dad now with the Dadvertising line. Call now. 0800 THE HEADS for a limited time only. We're not expecting you to go to full Briscoe's lady on this and offer your dad up half price. This is just the positive side to your father. Yeah, why do you want to say, why do you love your dad so much? Give him a shout out on the radio

and we've got, thanks to the New Zealand Herald, some premium subscriptions for three months so you can get the New Zealand Herald online. And happy Father's Day to all the great dads out there and even the shambles ones as well. We love you all. Sarah, you're on from Welly, Morena. Good morning. Okay.

Dadvertising, take it away. My dad's a fix-it dad, so you get stuck somewhere with your car, your car breaks down, you get a flat tyre, washing machine breaks down, he's the one to come. He's always there, any time. That's handy, eh? That's real handy to have that. Is it Trevor, your dad? Trevor, yeah, that's right.

Trevor sounds like a fix-it dad, Trevor. Don't worry, Trevor will fix it. Trevor, yeah, that's right. Trevor sounds like a fix-it dad. Trevor. Don't worry, Trevor will fix it. Yeah, he'll sort it out. That's good. That's very handy to have in life. Are you still living with them, Sarah? No, no.

We're still in the same city, though, so that's really awesome. And when things go wrong at your house, is Trevor over there fixing them? Absolutely. He might only get half the job done because he needs to go get parts, and then it'll take a few months to get back to it but he does get back to it. But that's awesome. See my kids when they get older, I'm not going to be that dad.

They'll be like, oh dad, can you come around and talk to me for three minutes before I play a song? That's all I'll be able to do. That's my skills. I'm not even good at that. So yeah, that's awesome. You can put on a bit of a pantomime at Christmas time. The washing machine's leaking and I'm just around here going, hey guys.

Hey, in topical news this week, did you hear the Prime Minister? I'm 100% of the hits if your washing machine's leaked. Yeah, but we're going to hook up your dad Trevor, right? He's got three months premium digital subscription for the New Zealand Herald.co.nz Awesome, thank you. Good on you. We'll get Satori on

from Raglan, 12-year-old Satori on from Raglan 12 year old Satori The dadvertising line is open for you mate I have the best dad He takes me skiing And to my soccer games And he takes us to the beach Aww, that's awesome He's doing some fun stuff with you

And I understand he's an essential worker So he's always working very hard Yeah That's awesome, I'm going to hook up your dad as well for Father's Day stuff with you. And I understand he's an essential worker, so he's always working very hard. Yeah. That's awesome. I'm going to hook up your dad as well for Father's Day. He gets three months premium digital subscription for the year old. Have a great day with your dad on Sunday. Thank you.

Wamaru is where we're heading next on New Zealand's Breakfast. Joe, you're on the air. Joe, you're off the air. And that was Joe. Oh, was that Joe? That was Joe. What do you say about Joe? She likes to be in and out quickly. Sometimes too quick for us. Yeah, shout out to her dad, Paul, and all the wonderful things that Paul does.

There we go. That was the dadvertising line for Father's Day. The thing my dad, I was just thinking before, he loves to do, he thinks he can do this whistle noise that sounds like a phone. It's like 60% there, but he'll often do it like you'd be standing there at, like, the fish and chip shop, and he'll do this whistle noise that sounds like a phone? It's like 60% there, but he'll often do it like he'll be standing there at a fish and chip shop and he'll do this noise and he'll go, is that the phone? Is that your phone? Is that your phone?

And then he'll do his hat, excuse me, I've got to take this. You're like, oh my god. You know, I want to hear this now. Is this a cool Kevin Boyce live situation? No, we're not doing him live. We're never going to take him live. He's always too scared to take Kevin live. We'll get it for Monday.

How's that sound? He wants it in a pre-recorded, confined, constrained manner. Oh, jeez, we're not going live on Kevin Boyce. We don't have 20 minutes to spare. Happy Father's Day to all the dads. We've got $5,000 up for grabs as well very shortly on the hits. Five words for 5K on the hits. You're only five words away

from a massive payday. Let's rip into our game of Word Association. Five grand on the line if your five words match up with our five words. All right, let's welcome from the Waikato, Elise.

Welcome to the program. How are you this morning? I'm good, thanks. How are you? Feeding the calves on the farm? Yeah, yeah. Just finished milking and now feeding a couple of calves. Well,

Ben Boyce, you've got some wonderful calf muscles. Very defined calf muscles, Ben Boyce, don't you? Thank you. You've probably got some, probably the best calves in radio, I'd say. Oh, no, they're very... Who's got better calves? You name me. Lots of other people would have better calves. Randall on the edge would probably have good calves, wouldn't he?

He definitely would have really good calves. Jeremy Wells the edge would probably have good calves, wouldn't he? Oh, yeah, he would have good calves, wouldn't he? He definitely would have real good calves. Jeremy Wells' calves would be long and contoured. Very tanned, too. Tanned calves as well. Imagine Mike Hosking, he'd have great calves, wouldn't he? A better class of calves, you know? Thank you, Mike. They'd be crafted by a surgeon or something, those calf muscles.

Anyway, at least we'll stop this weird calf muscle rant. You want to win $5,000, don't you? Oh, it'd be nice, thanks. How's the farming life in Level 3? Ah, nothing really changes, but we've just got all the kids home. Yeah, right, they've just become a burden on your day. Yeah, almost. A burden on your routine.

All right, now we need to decide who you're going to chuck into the soundproof booth. Who do you want to match five words with this morning? Ben. He's using those wonderful calves to walk into the soundproof booth. And he locks himself in there, as we've mentioned earlier. Not enough room to swing a cat in that little box.

A tiny gerbil, maybe? But not a fully grown cat. At least the pressure's now on you. Alright. First word that But not a fully grown cat. Elise, the pressure's now on you. All right. First word that comes into your head when I say fathers. Day. Easy. Producer Humphrey giving you some low-hanging fruit on the first one.

Almonds. Scorched. Yes, the best way to have almonds They're bleak without chocolate wrapped around them almonds Have you ever tried the skinny dipped almonds? Oh my goodness What do they do with them?

It's kind of like scorched almonds but a thin layer of chocolate and then there's like a raspberry dusting Oh my gosh, you can knock a whole packet back Great way to sex up almonds with chocolate Word number three for you, Elise, is creek. Oh,

water? Aren't you a lot contaminating those? Oh, not us. I'm just winding up, Elise. Frozen is the fourth word this morning. Sorry, frozen? Frozen, yeah.

Ice? Nice. And the fifth and final word for Elise from the Waikato News. In the middle of milking cows, swim. Pool. You did well, Elyse Hopefully You happy with the five words? I'm not sure about Creek

No one's ever 100% confident We'll release Ben Boyce Release the Boyce From the soundproof booth Elyse, tough words this morning, but I think she played a solid game, Benjamin. Okay. Alrighty, you're ready to win her $5,000. I'll try my best.

Fathers. Day. Almonds. Scorched. You going well, Elise? Third word, creek. Oh, creek.

Oh, one popped into my head, but it's pretty random, so I might go less random. River. Too random, bruh. Well, that was random. The Dawson's was the first one that popped into my head. I don't want to win. I don't want to win.

Sorry, what did we have for free? Elise, what did you go, Elise? Water. Yeah, Creek. She's wide open, Creek, that one. And you're up. Shit's Creek. I'm sorry, Elise.

No winning this morning. That's all right. Frozen was the fourth word. Again, Coke's the first thing popped into my I'm sorry, Elise. No winning this morning. That's alright. Frozen was the fourth word. Again, Coke's the first thing that pops into my head. Elise went ice on that one. And swim. Pull. Oh, okay.

We pulled it back with a three out of five, but not quite good enough this morning. Oh, that's okay. Sorry about that. Hey, Elise, do me a favour this weekend, okay? Go and have a great weekend. You too. Look about that. Hey, Elise. That's all right. Do me a favour this weekend, okay? Yep. Go and have a great weekend. You too.

Look after yourself. Thank you for listening. Spy, Jew, what's coming up? Oh, a massive, big, fat update on Rita Ora and Taika Waititi. Very exciting. Oh, it is. It is. I feel like we're more invested in this than Taika is.

We are. We might not be now. True. We might not be. Oh, they're developments be now. True. We might not be. Oh, they're developments. Yes. Let's break it down next. These developments for not developments.

Now, that sounds quite cryptic, but stick around. It's worth listening to it. All right, next. Spy. The What's Up. Spy.co.nz. Time for some spy Zaman news. Right.

Before we get into the Taika and Rita Ora update, I would like to talk about this very quickly. Very interesting. Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky's affair and his impeachment is going to be explored on a TV show called American Crime Story. Monica Lewinsky herself is a producer of the season. Oh, wow. Yeah, and American Crime Story, each season is almost like a self-contained miniseries. So season three focuses on this affair. They did a season on the O.J. Simpson murder case, the assassination of Giuliani Versace on another season.

And so she has been really involved from everything from the scripts to the costumes people wear. Oh, so they acted out as well, didn't they? Yeah, yeah. Sarah Paulson, who's in quite a few movies. How far does the acting go? Oh, no. Because, I mean, there's a commitment to that role that you need to take. Yeah, I know, I know.

I don't think you see anything happen, but it explores. It's all done tastefully. Yeah, it explores all that. And so it's going to be Wednesday next week coming out on Sky's Soho channel. So that'll be pretty interesting. I bet Bill Clinton's pumped about that. I know. He'll be like, oh, guys, it was years ago.

I'm a changed man. I know, I know. And poor Hillary who has to sit there and his daughter Chelsea. True, relive it all over again. I mean, people make mistakes, but not all their mistakes get turned into smash hit Netflix shows. No, that's very true. And now to the juicy update of Taika Waititi and Rita Ora. So they may be engaged.

So Rita Ora, she posted an Instagram story not long ago and very quickly deleted it. And the photo was of her left hand. She was wearing a bunch of rings but her ring finger on her left hand had a very carefully placed emoji over top of it covering what could be a ring so people are like why have you put an emoji very carefully over where you know an engagement ring could be or it might have been a very sloppily placed emoji. It could be one of two things, couldn't it? Yeah, but when you look at the photo

you're like, that's actually kind of weird, you know? You know? So specifically focusing it on her fingers. And it looks like it's the Tinder emoji. Yeah, it's the Tinder bio. Oh, sorry, Tinder, yeah. Their logo. Obviously not the same. No one knows if they're engaged or not, but by not showing a ring

people are speculating that maybe there is a ring there. Yes. It's a good bit of street talk though, isn't it? It is. Man, you're obsessed with Taika. You saw photos of, God, we're obsessed with Taika. We need to back off, don't we? He seems so cool.

He had tattoos at his 40th birthday party that she was holding. His birthday party she held for him. And you were like, has he got tattoos? And you went deep into his Instagram. Oh, yeah. They had tattoo sleeves, both arms fully covered up. Where's this come from? Two weeks ago, he didn't have a tattoo.

He didn't have that many tattoos. And for some reason, I don't know, don't ask me how, because I don't have anyone's contact details, but for some reason, I have Taika's email address. So I was like, well, we'll put this madness to bed. And emailed him. And he replied back within half an hour

and explained he was part of a stage show that he was hosting. So he needed the tender. That's for a role. He needed the tender. Temporary. Yeah, but they look good. So do I follow that email up with a hey mate?

Oh my gosh. Is it too much? I feel, well, it depends if you want. I don't think so. Let's get the tea. Do you want any correspondence with him in the future or not? Because this is, you know. The door's open now.

Maybe is it a free-flowing email related friendship? I feel like that's another step up. Depends what you want. If this is what you want, you'll feel like you've got one shot at it. Is this what you want? Well, I don't know.

I'm sure I could reply again. Hey, also we've just noticed that there's an emoji on your girlfriend's finger. What does this mean? Maybe I'll say it and then I'll leave the ball in his court. Up to you.

I'm sure we'll find out in due time anyway. And that is your Spy Update for this hour. For more, you can head to the Hitstock.com.nz. Very good. After 8 o'clock, we want to see if our dads love us. Literally, we want to see if our dads love us. And hook you guys up with your Oost people that are in Level 3 with some drive-thru, some takeaways all on us.

We want to do that after 8 on the Hits. New Zealand's breakfast. This is Jono and eight on The Hits. New Zealand's breakfast. This is Jono and Ben on The Hits. It is The Hits. Jono and Ben, just gone eight o'clock on your Friday. It is on Sunday. It is Father's Day. That's right.

It's coming. And we're celebrating. You're sparing a thought for the fathers. That's what all the advertising is saying out there. I'm sparing a thought for you, Ben. Yeah. What does spare a thought for mean? Just a quick little thought? How long does the

thought have to go on for when you've considered a spare thought? Maybe just like a little, oh, and then move on. That's what I would think. We throw spare a thought around recklessly, don't we? Spare a thought for this person, spare a thought for that person. Yeah, well this time, spare a thought for the fathers, and we've

got your father, Kevin Boyce, ex-Kings, the hip hop artist wonderful Kings, true gentleman Kings isn't he? He's great Kings he's not the masked singer, the last year he was the masked singer Kings, yeah. Yeah, got a wonderful voice and this is Kings and Kevin Boyce, Ben's father

with a song called Dad Jokes, now there's no more sophisticated brand of comedy than puns and so if you enjoy highbrow humour, you're going to love this. It's Father's Day. This song goes out to all the bicycles out there who can't stand on their own because they're too tired.

Yeah, we're telling dad jokes. Oh, yeah. What, what? Yeah, we're telling dad jokes. All right, Mr. King, tell us some more dad jokes. At 2.30, you were sentenced to go to the dentist. How was your trip? I guess I'll see you next fall.

I'm hiding in your wardrobe. It's none of your business. My cat is sick. You know it's not feeling well. Can I watch the TV? Yeah, but don't turn it on. At the cemetery, they're dying to get in real bad. How far away is dinner?

It's just in the kitchen. Dad, I'm hungry. Hi, hungry. I'm dead. You were telling dad jokes. You were telling dad jokes. You were telling, you were, you were telling, you were telling, you were telling, ha! Did you know towels are the leading cause of dry skin? Must be a frog in my throat, with that croak.

Steak puns are a rare meaty, um, well, gunk There's a restaurant on the moon with no atmosphere Just like a bald man, I'm outta here Now Forrest Gump's password's one, Forrest one What did the mountain climber name his son Cliff? What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved I'm just a dad, doing all he can to be a better man

Keeping a deadpan Just a dad, doing all he can to be a better man. Keeping a deadpan. Just a dad. Whoa. Just a dad. Whoa. Just a dad. Whoa.

You're a dead job. Dracula's a pain in the neck. You're a dead job. Velcro. What a rip off. Russian dolls are so full of themselves. I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.

I eat it. I eat it. For all the lovers of dad jokes, happy Father's Day to dads on Sunday. Now next, many, well, everyone outside of Auckland is in level three, so we want to open up our drive-through next and we'll tell you how you can win some drive-through takeaways on us

in just a few moments on the hits. We apologise in advance sorry about that sorry about that i'm sorry to rope you into this sorry you've been dragged into this breakfast on the heads the heads now uh level three is what many people outside of auckland are enjoying uh right now so we wanted to um basically open up our own we can't get to go to the drive through we're gonna open up our own drive-thru right now and reward some people. That's right. I borrowed my daughter Poppy's walkie-talkies.

And we're going to act as a drive-thru facility. So you can experience the drive-thru in audio form. And then whatever you want to order at the drive-thru, we'll give you, right? Yeah, that's right. We'll give you the money so you can go buy that later at the drive-thru. And that will be on us, even hearing about Level 3. You sound like a pilot. We can't even understand what you're saying.

Now, yesterday we spoke to someone who was in Level 3 who was enjoying their takeaways. And just hearing about it all made us just go, oh. Talk to us about the takeaways you've had over the last 24 hours please i have had health pizza oh nice what did it taste like talk to us oh it was so good and i got some leftover from my lunch oh you don't even have to make lunch as well as making dinner have you had like a coffee from a cafe uh i've actually got one with me in the car. Oh, stop! Too much. Actually, speaking of drive-thrus, in Queenstown yesterday, a couple of skateboarders, well,

they were carrying skateboarders. Someone had just placed an order at the drive-thru in the KFC Queenstown, and they put it out on the ledge for the person to grab it from the car, but they timed it. These couple of young guys timed it and grabbed it and took off down to the park so took the kfc yeah not good timing but you know but also you know oh they stole it yeah about 80 dollars worth of kfc uh yeah well this is something i'd phone talk back up about and start moaning yeah about

the kids pants down too low your granddad used to hose them off with the garden hose, didn't he? Anyone on a skateboard he thought was a menace. Really? To get the garden hose out? Yeah, next to his property, be out in the garden. And if skateboarders were just riding along the footpath, he'd spray them. And I was like, you can't do that.

Isn't that assault? Yeah. And they're like, they're on the footpath where they're allowed to, you know. Yeah. It's like, oh, yeah, a little footpath. Hose them off like it's pittosporums. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. So this is what we're going to do. Oh, 800 the hits. If you want to take part in our drive-through takeaway right now, anything you want to order, you will give it to you, basically. And in the meantime, for all those who can't experience takeaways, here might be a helpful hotline for you. Yeah.

We'll do that. Oh, we're doing that? Okay. Are you an Aucklander stuck in level four lockdown? Do you have certain desires? Certain fantasies? Well, now there's an 0900 number perfect for you. The Level 3 Adult Hotline.

Well, guess where I am right now? I'm in Christchurch at Level 3. Oh, yeah. I remember Level 3 Adult Hotline. Well, guess where I am right now? I'm in Christchurch at Level 3. Oh, yeah. I remember Level 3. Keep talking to me. Guess what I just said in my mouth. You tell me. Tell me what you put in your mouth.

Please tell me. Takeaway. Oh, God. Were they greasy? Yeah, greasy and very satisfying. I want my mouth to be greasy and satisfying. Phone up and you can take away all your level three takeaway fantasies. On the phone, because you can't go get any.

So, uh, you just left your house? Yeah, and then I picked up a real hot... Oh, tell me what you picked up. Coffee from a cafe made by a trained barista. Oh, yeah. Tell me more. A flat white. It was hot and creamy. Oh, yeah. Tell me more. A flat white. It was hot and creamy. Oh, I remember those.

For those who want a bit of level four play while dreaming of level three. Oh, yeah. It must have been dirty. Was it dirty? No, not at all. There were actually no dishes whatsoever. Oh, my God. And you didn't even have to cook it?

No. Someone else did that for me. The Level 3 Adult Hotline. It's hot and steamy, like a pizza. And then afterwards, I got takeaways delivered to my door. Hot, steamy slices of

pizza. Oh, I want some of those now. That was a great call. Thanks for that, Mum. You're welcome, darling. Are you looking after yourself? Yeah, I am. I am. Alright, darling. Talk to you later. Alright. Love to Dad. Bye. Morning. This show contains traces of Jono and Ben. The Hits with Jono and Ben for breakfast. You're on The Hits. Jono and Ben on your Friday morning. And of course, Auckland is the only place left in Level 4

around Aotearoa, and right now, everywhere else, you can get takeaways. Takeaways are back on the menu again, so we wanted to open up for us to at least experience some form of the takeaway experience, our own drive-thru. We've resorted to this, have we? This is what it's come to, an audio version of a drive-thru and some walkie-talkies from my daughter's bedroom. Okay, so I'll wait under the hedge. You just phone us up. You need to pretend that you're in a car. We'll pretend we're at the drive-thru and some walkie-talkies from my daughter's bedroom. Okay, so I'll wait under the hitch. You just phone us up.

You need to pretend that you're in a car. We'll pretend we're at the drive-thru. You just make your order and we'll make it come true, Ben. Yeah, we'll make it come true. We'll give you the money and you can go out and buy it later today on us. It'll be like BK, but it'll be BJ's. Ben and Jono's takeaways.

Yeah, you don't seem on board with that. No, it's fine. Jay's only one letter off K. Same sort of thing. I didn't want to get done for copyright reasons. Yeah, yeah. All right, here's the... Welcome to the drive-thru, Richard.

It's weird I know your name. Oh, God, this is a good one. It's hard to hear you, I know. Are you there? Are you there? Oh, it's your order. Oh, dear God. Is this working or is it...

No, I can hear you. You can make your order. You can make your order. Cabo Large Wendy's Baconator Meal, please, and a Frosty, please. One large Baconator and a Frosty. Would you like one of those to come with? Yes, please. Oh, there you go.

Okay, I'll do it for you in a second. There you go. That's all I knew. Well done. There we go. That felt good. It was a little fumbly, wasn't it? But we you go. There you go. That's all I knew. Well done. There we go. That felt good. It was a little fumbly, wasn't it? But we got there.

A bit shaky. Yeah. A bit shaky at the start. BJ's hasn't got a food grading yet either. Debra, you're on from Raglan. Oh, good morning. How are you? Good, thank you very much.

I'll take that order. Can I please get one of the largest buckets you've got of that greasy KFC chicken with chips and all that fizzy drink to rot my teeth, please? That's not a good adjustment for the establishment. Thank you. There you go. So it's coming your way as well. Enjoy. I'm very jealous you can go get that.

All right, next. Keriwai. Keriwai. Again, it's can go get that. Alright, next. Kere wai. Kere wai. Again, it's kind of weird that I know your name. You've just driven up to the speaker box. Would you like to make your order, kere wai? Good morning. Yes, please. Could I please have a large boss burger combo with a large

chocolate shake and a large hot chocolate. All for dad. I'm sorry, it's breakfast now. I can't provide that. Come back after 10am. Love hot chocolate. All for Dad. I'm sorry, it's breakfast, Dad. I'll be back. No, yeah. I can't promise. Let's come back after tonight.

You can have that. You're right now. We'll hook you up with that later on. There you go. Awesome, thank you. Go on, you're kidding, why? Keep safe in Tokoroa. Enjoy your takeaways.

Yeah, yeah, nah. Yeah, nah. Yeah, nah. The home of yeah, nah. She'll be right in at the end of the day. Jono and Ben. Breakfast on the hits. takeaways. 8.23 on your Friday morning. Now, after 9 o'clock, this is happening on The Hits. Yeah, so

wonderful campaign this one, the 90s versus noughties. You can slap on your Macarena and hyper-coloured T-shirt or put your G-string up over the back of your jeans. That was a fad in the early 2000s, Ben, I found out. It's starting to come back, that, actually. Really? Yeah, some celebrities are wearing sort of what looks like a G-string

above their skirt line or on the red carpets. Oh, there you go. It's fashion, the secular, isn't it? Yeah. It always comes back, doesn't it? Yeah, it does. It goes round in cycles. Yeah, so today after 9 o'clock, we're doing the best party anthems,

the 90s taking on the 2000s, and we wanted to play one right now that was not on the list. We found out later. It's not even up for a vote. It's not even up. It's not even up. It's up. So we wanted to play it right now and get it away

because it is such a great party anthem for the 2000s. Enjoy it. And it kicks off after nine o'clock this morning. The 90s versus the noughties on the hits. It's the party rock anthem. Enjoy. Here to pretend he knows what he's talking about when it comes to the news.

Benjamin Boyce, what has been happening around the world? Well, obviously a lot of COVID-related news. Are you exhausted with this? Too much coverage, is there? I feel like, yeah, I feel I've been searching for other stuff there we could maybe talk about. Just to give that a bit of a break.

You know, we know it's there, it's a thing. It's all, you know, and we're going to keep updating you on that. But right now I'm just fatigued on it. All right, so this is a special edition of Scrolling Through Your Feed. Non-COVID-related topics. Yeah. Now, according to a scientific discovery, so we're still talking science.

There's scientists out there that's not fighting viruses. And these scientists have been looked into whether a female gets a better night's sleep. This is what they've looked into. Sleeping next to a dog or next to their male partner. Oh, I know what the answer's going to be. She wouldn't be reading about it. It was the dog. The dog.

They reckon they get a better night's sleep sitting next to a dog. To be fair to the males, dogs are smaller. They take up less real estate on the mattress. So 962 adult women in the US took part in this, and they reckon dogs overall provide people with a greater sense of security and comfort, and they will kind of almost sync up with your sleeping, rather than, you know, like tossing and turning and pulling blankets and stuff. They'll kind of, you know, work around you.

A bit more courteous. Although sometimes dogs can fidget a lot when they're sleeping. You know, they get up and they're... Also, when you chuck a child into the mix too, I always find that half my body ends up hanging over the side of the bed. You kind of get shunted. I get shunted at.

Our dog, Bo, he's very big so we don't, not allowed on the bed, but the family love to, when I'm not there, you know, just kind of sneak him up to the bed. Oh, this is a dad rule. It's funny when I walk, if I walk into the room or room or whatever the dog's like he just won't look me in the eye you know he's just like he's shamed he's like i know i shouldn't be here but they put me up here it's not me mate it's not me and he's just he won't even look at me i'll be like what's going on

here oh jeez oh god that's the cutest thing I've seen. You got me, boss. And he won't look at me. He's like, look at me, look at me. What are you doing? He's like, no. They made me do it. Yeah, that's very cute. And The Witches.

I know that's one of the books, one of the few books that you've read, Roald Dahl, The Witches. Yeah, The Witches and the entire Bible. Okay, well, good on you. That was just to get your kids into school. Now, The Witches, the original movie, there's been two movies. So there's one from the 1990s, The OG Witches. Terrifying

that film. I've still got nightmares from that film. Yeah, so that was actually filmed at an actual hotel in Cornwall and now they've decided that they're hiring it. There's a job going at the moment for people to play the part of a witch at the hotel. There's a job going at the moment for people to play the part of a witch at the hotel. It's a part-time job

not full-time but you get paid to basically go around and you're responsible for terrifying children and adults that stay at the hotel to get the full witch's experience. But the issue being is that there's a whole, probably two or three generations worth of people now who haven't seen that movie. So they'll be like,

who is this creepy? You'd have to chuck it on before you went, wouldn't you? Go, we're starting the hotel with the witches thing, and then we're going to do the witches thing. Yeah, you would. Otherwise, you're laying a complaint with management straight away. This crazy person's scaring all the kids. So you need to have a convincing grand high witch face mask, which you will wear.

They'll provide that for you, but you also have a cackle and theatrical ability to bring the full role to life for the guests there as well. Bit a little bit creepy though, isn't it? Hmm. Hmm. Yeah, it would be.

There was a restaurant where all the waiters were purposely they were inept and they would abuse you and you went to it. A lady accidentally spooked some wine on me

and not part of the act and then afterwards she dropped the act and she said I'm so sorry, I'm sorry about that. Because she'd been abusing him all night for comedy reasons.

Yeah. Then suddenly you were like, oh, I wasn't meant to do that. My bad. Please don't tell my boss. It was all good. Have a great weekend. Keep safe out there. Stay safe.

Stay sanitised. Spread your legs. Yeah, that's what you like to say. You and Chris Hipkins. Have a great weekend. And we'll catch you Monday from 6. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the'll catch you Monday from 6.