Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: Jono's Daughter Exposes His Fashion Sense...

Episode Date: July 27, 2022

Today on the Jono & Ben podcast, Jono recalls a story from when his daughter Poppy revealed that his sense of fashion isn't as good as he anticipated and Ben explains how he embarrassed himself in front of one of his idols... Ross Taylor!   Follow @thehitsbreakfast on Instagram and Facebook for all of our latest content.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits with the Jono and I was too too young and I didn't want to ruffle any feathers to correct anyone on what people called me well you love making nicknames for people so it seems only fear

that you know they made a nickname for you that you've stuck with yeah you've got you've got a number you could go Benny yeah

Benbo yeah Benjamin Benji you know all that yeah do you like Ben? yeah I don't mind

Ben's good simple he's done you well it's done me fine it's a pretty common name did you have a name when you were a kid

when you were growing up as a kid you always dreamed that you were your parents named you that mine was Mark for some reason I distinctly remember

riding to I lived on Ashby Avenue to the Ashby Avenue dairy riding up my bike going I wish I was called Mark. Oh, really? I don't know. I think there was a Mark on a show. That's a good name.

There used to be a show I used to watch called Steel Riders. Did you watch Steel Riders? Which is about all these kids on BMXs and they'd get chased around by a bad guy on a motorbike. I think Mark was one of the kids on the BMXs. Right, so you kind of went, yeah. The kids always liked doing that to me. What were the shortlists of the names you were going to call? Sometimes I threw out ridiculous ones.

Rufus. That's what we almost called you that number. Yes, that's a fun one. I don't know if there was a name. I always, every now and again, I see a cool name, and I'm like, oh, that would be cool to be like. You see these Americans like, hey, I'm Chase, or something like that.

You're like, oh, that's cool. Yeah, like, you see these Americans like Chase or something like that. You're like, oh, that's cool. Yeah, like Shooter. Yeah, but I never could do it. Joel, our producer Joel, who's with us right now, are you happy? I mean, your name's great. Yeah. Great.

Yeah, yeah. I'm happy that's not like a really generic name, I think. It's not the most generic name, Joel, but like Ben or something would be far too generic. Joel is no longer, it's not a long, there's no longer Joel. No, maybe like Joel sometimes. or something would be far too generic. Joel is no longer it's not a long version of Joel. Maybe like Joel sometimes people read it, I'm not sure how but yeah. I know

a couple who named their baby Axel Oh yeah. Axel's just got a life, you know, Axel has just got a life of credibility ahead of him doesn't he? It seems to be the thing that you know I mean some of those names are coming back in vogue now. Some of the older fashion sounding names,

they're kind of becoming trending again. But there was a period there for a while that was you had to have your traditional names and then, you know, if anyone went too crazy,

you're like, oh my God, they've called a baby Apple or something. Oh yeah, it's Apple. Yeah, it's a great name.

Baby, now here's some, okay, I've got a list of the coolest baby names. Oh yeah. Jagger. Oh yeah Jagger Oh

Jagger's a ripper Yeah Huck Huck Gus Gus Oh yeah Gus is that Jagger

You started well Yeah am I fading out on it Am I Oh no it's not bad It's just Jagger was pretty You know Zephyr No

Okay I've lost you There was one We actually got a text We're going to follow up To that In a couple of days Their last name was King Remember that And then their uncle no okay i've lost you there was one we actually got a text we're going to follow up to that uh in a couple of days their last name was king remember that and then their uncle their uncle at birth decent marriages years ago he used to work there and their last name was the person that came in last name was king and i think they went with no smo no smo or something like that

and they're like what's what's that mean they went oh we drove past a sign on the way here it was like no smoking and my last name's king so they just took the start of it. No smoke. So his name's No Smoke. No Smoke and King. Apparently it's a true story. So we're going to try and get that verified before the end of the week. So the full name is No Smoking.

Yeah. Well, I guess when you write it down, it says No Smoking. Great message. Great message to get out there. Were there other signs they were looking at on the way to Burst December? I guess maybe they were there last name being King. They went, oh, there's our name on the thing. It's a sign guess maybe that was their last name being King they went oh there's our name on the thing

it's a sign literally it's a sign and they went I don't know if this is a true story or not apparently it's a true story so I'd like

to get that verified wasn't the dad's name Mike as well Mike King was it Mike King that did that one or no was it a different King

if I just leave myself into a Mike King joke have I comedian Mike King oh no this is a Mike

King joke have I have I just fallen in trap some vintage King comedy now Mike King joke, have I? Comedian Mike King. Oh, no. This is a Mike King joke. Have I? Have I just fallen trap? Have I fallen trap? Some vintage King comedy. Now, Mike King doesn't even do comedy now. Yeah. Have I fallen trap into one of those?

I don't know. We'll find out on tomorrow's show. Oh, jeez. Enjoy the podcast. It's Jono and Ben, but FYI, Ben is open to other options. Jono and Ben on the hits. I find the older I'm getting, the more I'm enjoying a bargain. You know, I'm more of a bargain hunting.

I've got the discount mall down the road from my house. Right, yeah. I'm always at the discount mall. I'm like, why am I ever paying full price for anything ever again? Right. So it's always a bargain. And I came across some $45 shoes. Not bad.

That's not too bad, eh? You know, Vans. Yeah. Oh, right. You know, you're sort of looking about the $150 mark, aren't you, for a new pair of Vans? Yeah. $45. What do you think, Producer Joel?

You know, you're a little bit younger than us. You know, more millennial. What do you think? Is that, you know, Vans? Can you pull off Vans? Are they still cool? That's cool, yeah. I think they're pretty cool, especially for $45.

Are you sure they weren't Vans or were they Vans is Can he pull off Vans Are they still cool That's cool yeah I think they're pretty cool Especially for 45 bucks Are you sure They weren't Vans Or were they Vans But the problem is Can a 40 year old Pull off $45 Vans You know that's the issue Anyway I got myself

Some Vans Oh now I'm second Now I'm second guessing Am I a Vans guy Yeah I'm like oh You get to get To that point

Maybe I should have Got some boat shoes Oh yeah Some comfortable shoes Mum was always saying Comfortable shoes Comfortable shoes And again You get to get to that point. Maybe I should have got some boat shoes. Some comfortable shoes. Mum was always saying comfortable shoes. Comfortable shoes. And again, I tell you what, if you want comfortable shoes, New Balance.

What is this? Is this an advert now for you? No, I didn't get free New Balance. All right. So anyway, I bought these shoes and I'm wearing them. And the problem is they're squeaky. I've got squeaky shoes. Okay. Here's some audio.

That's me forcing a squeak, obviously. So they're happening from time to time as you go about your day. Not time to time. Just as I slowly walk as well. Quick, quick, quick, quick. Now I see why they were $45. Now, you know, you want $45 shoes, well, you've got to take the squeak.

That's the issue. And I can surprise no one now. If I'm coming up to surprise you, Ben, you'll hear squeak, squeak, squeak. You'll know who's coming. And the squeaky shoes sometimes sound like some other part of your body that's making some noise, and then you always feel like you have to justify the shoes.

You're like, it's the shoes, it's the shoes, and then you go feel like you have to justify the shoes you're like it's the shoes it's the shoes and then you go to recreate the noise never you never can do it it's like a chair you sit on it someone's like oh hello and you're like no i didn't make that noise it was the chair and then you can never get the noise to make it again happened the exact scenario you're talking about happened to me yesterday afternoon i'm at home my phone case rubber okay i accidentally pushed it. Already know it now. I'm like, I don't believe it. Okay, the push along the desk. See, it's not making the noise now.

Yeah, but it went. Kind of like that. And it was on the kitchen bench. Everyone else heard it. They're like, oh, in the kitchen. I'm like, no, no, no. It was the rubber phone case. I just knocked it.

Couldn't replicate it. Yeah. It's a very sad day. It's the show. And those noises, the ones I do appreciate, and it's like the squeaky shoes. They're like, we're just going to keep squeaking, mate. Nothing you can do about it. It's like when your stomach makes a noise, and you try and ignore it.

Yeah. And everyone else has heard it. You try and pretend it didn't happen. It's like your stomach's going, mate, I'm going to keep going until you acknowledge me publicly. And it keeps getting louder and louder. You're like, oh, jeez, I must be juicing food or something. Scrolling through your feed.

Hard news. Soft presenters scrolling through your feed. Now, after 37 years, 37 years on air, on the TV, the Australian Soap Neighbours is coming to an end with its final episode broadcasting tonight. 37 years is a heck of a run, eh? That is a phenomenal run, poor Neighbours is coming to an end with its final episode broadcasting tonight. 37 years is a heck of a run, eh? That is a phenomenal run, poor Neighbours. And it was huge in the UK too, wasn't it? Launched Kylie Minogue's career over there.

Yeah, that's the thing. The household names that created included Jason Donovan, Kylie Minogue, Margot Robbie, Guy Pearce, Russell Crowe and Liam Hemsworth. So pretty, pretty all-star. Russell Crowe? Did he stay on there? Apparently. Did he? I never had heard that before. According to this article this morning. You'd be like, g'day bastards. Russell Crowe and Liam Hemsworth. It's a pretty all-star. Russell Crowe? Did he start on there? Did he?

I'd never heard that before. According to this article this morning. G'day, bastards. Who's this neighbour who's moved into this? Ramsey Street. Yeah, mate. Out here to bloody do some burnouts, drink some BB. And the final episode's going to be broadcasting tonight in Australia.

It's going to feature the return of Kylie Minogue. Jason Donovan's going to be back. Margot Robbie's going to be back as well. They even think Delsa Goodrum, who was on... Is she on there? Yeah, apparently. Did she start or no? Apparently she's going to be returning tonight as well. So they really have...

I mean, it's probably like when you look at Shortland Street and all the stars that's created from Tim Morrison to KJ Apa, you know? You're like, wow. It's very sad. So dwindling ratings, hopefully. Well, I mean, we know all about dwindling ratings. We've dwindled in the ratings. And I think also that,

because you just said before, it was really big in the UK as well as Australia. I think they struggled to find a broadcaster in the UK and once that was off the table, they were like, eh. They're all done. We know. But then you get a petition and it doesn't work.

You get thousands of people to sign a petition. Not that you start it yourself, but people start it. And you're like, look, there's all these thousands. We've got a petition, and it doesn't work. You get thousands of people to sign a petition. Not that you start it yourself, but people start it. And you're like, look, there's all these thousands. We've got a petition, guys. They're like, we give zero shits, mate. Still going. Still being cancelled. But the people are signing this.

There's a petition. Doesn't matter. Why weren't those people watching? I don't know. I don't know. But they're signing a petition right now. And yesterday, something else finished up as well. After two and a half years, Dr. Ashley Bloomfield signed off his final media stand-up.

You know, he comes out, talks to the media as Director General of Health. Speaking of dwindling ratings, I imagine the old 1pm press conferences suffered a blow. Not quite as popular, but 307 press conferences they reckon he did over the last couple of years. Hasn't he been just a rock solid individual through this whole thing? He has. He has just been so even keeled. And it's exactly the sort of personality you need in a situation like this. He left to a rapturous round of applause.

I saw that on the news. He was a little bit awkward about it too. Because he would be. So he walked away from the podium and the whole office is out there and clapping away. And he's like, oh. And he had to walk through the middle. He's kind of waving. Yeah.

Head down waving. He's like, I just wanted to hand him a swipe card and leave. Well, we got pretty, you know, a little bit carried away. I mean, he's been doing a great job, don't get me wrong. But we got a bit carried away. I mean, he put his face on tea towels. There was tattoos, hot sauce, t-shirts. We really, I mean, New Zealand, we love getting swept

up in something, eh? We do. We're like Springfield on The Simpsons, you know? We just get swept up in something, and then six months later, we're like, oh wow, we really let ourselves get off. Who got the tattoo? Someone got a tattoo. Five years time.

Five years time, someone's going to go, who's that? That was the director general of health the curb crusher mate the curb crusher oh do you remember

Covid Danny Bloomfield every day it was like the hero of the nation that person got swept up in the madness

I've got a lot of regrettable tattoos so I can sympathise and that is what is making news this morning if you're here for advice on life you're in big trouble Jono and Ben I'm a regrettable tatter, so I can sympathise. And that is what is making news this morning. If you're here for advice on life, you're in big trouble.

Jono and Ben on the hits. We've been talking a lot this week about people that go against the grain. Renegades. Go against the grain. Renegades. So people that like stuff that everybody else seems to dislike, or the opposite, where they dislike stuff that everyone else likes. We spoke to a lady who, I think the only person in the world who dislikes hot chips, French fries.

Yeah. I thought, this was my thought, that food, as an industry, food went, you know, we've designed a lot of stuff, you're not agreeing on anything, there's too much debate going on, we're going to create a food that all of human kind can enjoy, and that is french fries. And she's the one person going against the grain. But yeah, she wasn't a fan. She felt obligated to eat it. She was like,

I like potatoes, something like that. Do you go against the grain on anything? Well, we mentioned the other day, cake is probably one for me. I'm just not a huge fan. I tried anti-vaxxing for a while. Public pressure got on top of me. Oh, hey, mate. Who knows now?

I'm still not sure. Again, we get swept up in the whole thing, and then six months later, you're like, where is... Anyway, let's not get into that right now. It's not time to get down to the vaccination hole. Let's not go down that rabbit hole. All right, we've got all the phones. 0800 the hits.

Welcome to New Zealand's breakfast this morning. Caroline. Hello. How are you, mate? I'm all right. How are you? Yeah, good. of the hits. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast this morning. Caroline! Hello! How are you, mate? I'm alright. How are you? Yeah, good. You going against the grain on what? Oh, avocados. Yuck. Not an avocado

fan. I've never met anyone who doesn't enjoy the cardo. No, the smell, the texture. What about if it was like in a sandwich with around, you know, surrounded by bacon and tomato or something like that? No, wouldn't order it, couldn't do it.

Couldn't do it? Wouldn't order it, couldn't do it. So when was the last time you tried avocado? Oh, I had it as a kid. I couldn't stomach it. How old are you now, if you don't mind me asking? 39. 39. You can get back in the avocado game. The next question is, how many houses do you own?

Because we hear that a lot of people spend money on avocados. So what have you got, 20, 30 houses? I wish. She's a property mogul. Yeah, all the money you've saved on avocado. I've never quite made the connection between avocado purchasing and not being able to afford a house. I would happily not. I mean, I love avocado, but I'd happily not have it just

if it gave me a house or two. Yeah, right. She's anti-avvy, anti-vax. Well, no, you're not anti-vax. She might be pro. I don't want to get into your vaccination status. That doesn't matter nowadays. But she's definitely anti-avocado. Definitely, definitely. Hey, thank you, Caroline. You're going to have a great day in Tauranga. You too. Cheers.

See ya, mate. Julie with us this morning on New Zealand's Breakfast. Julie, you're going against the grain with what? Towels. Okay, well, you don't like towels? You just drip dry? What's going on? I love towels, but I really don't like going to hotel rooms and getting big, fluffy towels.

I just don't like them. I like short, scratchy towels. What, like little scratchy hand towels or something? A bit bigger than that, but yeah, I don't like the buns that are head to toe. So you wouldn't put a towel in with some fabric soft or anything like that? You're like, no, I like them scratchy and small. Yes, I don't see the point of those big, huge, fluffy monstrosities. Generally, the point is to dry it, to use to dry yourself.

In a very lovely, pleasurable way. You're like, oh, that's scratchy. I guess it does the job. It just maybe irritates you a little. Have you always preferred scratchy over fluffy? I don't know. I think it's just evolved. I've never thought about it that much. So, okay, you're in a situation where you have to use a

fluffy towel. What's Julie doing? I'll still use them, but I wouldn't go out of my way. It's not a pleasurable drying experience when you're having to use a fluffy towel. No, I just don't feel like it dries you as well. But the problem is when you're relying on

scratchy old towels, at some point they're going to become unusable, and you're going to have to get new ones and fight your way through it. What a horrible problem to have. All right, there we go. Against the grain on towels. Give her a small and scratchy any day of the week. No problem, no problem.

It was great talking to you. Jonas Internet Wormhole. Got lost on the internet again, guys. Sorry, I need to really pull myself together. Is there some sort of group I can go and visit? You do love the internet, don't you? I do. I used to see that on holiday.

I was like, what are you reading? Instagram? Yeah, I like reading Instagram. Got us a very funny clip. I love Cardi B. I think she's very funny. Great personality. Whap, one of my favorites.

Okay. Play that to the kids all the time. Take them to school. But she did carpool karaoke with Corden. I don't know if this is new or if it's an old one, but there's a little sequence there, and he's asking her how many cars she's got. Have a listen.

Now, I know you love cars. How many cars have you got now? I have a Lambo. I have a Lamborghini truck. I have a Bentley truck. I have a Maybach. And I have a Suburban. So five.

Five cars. Now, here's my biggest question. You can't drive? No. So what's the point of having the cars? To take pictures, maybe. So she's got probably, you know, $10 or $15 million worth of cars,

and she doesn't drive them. This was in 2018. You could go to a car yard and probably sneak a picture. This is what Corden goes on to say. He's like, if you want a photo with a Ferrari, just go to the Ferrari car yard. I guess it's not the same. This is where the internet holds. Well, she actually went on to say, she's like, well, I can't rap about Ferrari, just get a Ferrari car. I guess it's not the same. This is where the internet holds.

Well, she actually went on to say, she's like, well, I can't rap about owning all this stuff if I don't own it. Don't own the stuff. You've got to have the credibility. There's cred in the rap game, Ben. Right. That's why you're not in it, mate. That's why I never had the cred for the rap game.

And me too. But I did get lost in a wormhole on the internet of celebrities who can't drive. They're too famous to drive. And there's some interesting... Ricky Gervais. Really? Ricky Gervais. And this only came about because Top Gear,

when they were looking for a new host to replace Clarkson, they went to Gervais and they're like, mate, we would love you to host the show. And he said, I'm honoured. But I would be the worst possible person for this because I can't drive. Would have been a good little story on Top Gear, though, wouldn't it? Can he get his driver's license?

Can he get his license and all these experts coming in to help him out? Yeah. And so then he goes on to say, like, if there's any movie roles that he's playing that it requires the character to drive, the producers and directors have to put the car on the back of a trailer and shoot off the back of a trailer. And he has to pretend he's driving. Noel Gallagher. Oh, if I were Asus.

What's the story, Morning Glory? The story is Noel Gallagher can't drive. He said in the 90s he was too effing busy to learn how to drive. Wow. Because all Asus were blowing up then, weren't they? I suppose you can't take time out of your world tour to sit your learners. Sit your learners.

I know George Ezra. I don't know if you had him come out, but I know he doesn't drive because his song, I'll Be Riding Shotgun, is all about him. No, it is. It is. Oh, it's actually is. Yeah. It actually is.

I'm not making a gag. It actually is. George Ezra. Joel said Stevie Wonder. Oh, come on, guys. Failed his driver's license. Guys, we're better than that. Come on.

And the other one, Robbie Williams has never had his driver's license. He said he's got to an age now. He's in his 50s. He's quite embarrassed that he can't drive a car. Really? Robbie Williams? However, this didn't stop him from spending about $3 million in the... When he was 18 years old, Take That was his first band.

They were over at Elton John's house for a barbecue. And Elton John had a fleet of luxury cars and Robbie Williams was like, I like all your cars, they look nice in front of your house. So that afternoon he went and bought $3 million worth of vehicles like Ferraris and Porsches and Mercedes. Oh, kind of like Cardi B, just buying cars. Like Cardi B, and he couldn't drive them all.

And then he sold them the next week. He's like, this is... Why have I done this? I've done some regrettable purchases over my time, but $3 million worth of luxury cars. The Hits. Experts in giving out inexpert advice. Jono and Ben on The Hits.

Now, I'm a little worried because you've been on the phone somewhere before that maybe has a question, query, or a complaint. Yes. Now, Ben, I said we'd call them back and we'd deal with it. We like to confront these things head on, don't we? I don't. Or we like to dodge them and pass them on to management. Exactly.

Yeah. Have you had a complaint about you? Oh, sure, many times. Yeah. Many, many times. One of our favorite things was when we were working at TV3, because they used to have the reception complaint logs, so people would phone through and go,

Mike McRobert's eye looks wonky or his tie doesn't match his... They complain about such ridiculous things. Unusual things. It's amazing what people get hooked into. And so then you could look through the log and just, you know, put some sunshine into your day about...

Yeah. Why is John Campbell saying marvellous all the time? It's not marvellous all the time. Yeah. So we're going to deal with one of these right now. All right. Go through. Producer Joel, here we go.

Good morning, Serena speaking. Serena, it's Jono and Ben here from the HITS questions, queries and complaints department. How are you? Yeah, righto. You had a question. Oh, the Trade Depot ad. Yeah, she has a question about the Trade Depot ad. Trade Depot.

I'll just put you through to our questions department. Okay, yeah, sorry. Thank you so much. Oh, am I the questions department? That's what I'm pointing at you. But do you notice I start with a question? That's what we do at the questions department. Hold on, listen, can you still hear us, Serena?

Yeah. She's still there, yeah. It was good I started with a question. How's what we do at the questions department. Hold on. Listen, can you still hear us, Serena? Yeah. She's still there. It was good I started with a question. How can I help you in the questions department? Another question from the questions department. Well, do they say trade depot in the singing on the ad, or is it trade depot? So what are you saying?

Are they saying trade? Trade. Yeah, it seriously sounds like she's saying that. Trade, like T-R-A-G-E, are you saying? Are they saying trage? Trage. Yeah, it seriously sounds like she's saying that. Trage, like T-R-A-G-E, are you saying? So you, okay, instead of Trade Depot. Dakota, that's it. Yeah, okay. Isn't it like all of the stuff that happens on the, you know,

we're working a slog in our guts out to create content. And that's what I pick up on. Yeah, it's like, you're like, Trade Depot. Is it trade or trage? Do you know how many hours we pour into this show? Okay, let's have a listen. You know what? I heard trage.

It does sound, it might be one of those optical sort of illusions sort of thing. Not optical because we're not looking at it. Oh, I got trade. No, I got trade, Serena. Yeah, I told you. Yeah, it's Trades Depot. She's right. It it's Trade Depot. She's right. It's Trade Depot.

It's definitely Trade Depot. TradeDepot.co.nz Now I heard trade. It's like the optical aerolibs. Yeah. I did hear trade did that time. Yeah. It's like that Yanny or Laurel or whatever it was that you had a while ago.

Yeah. Interesting. Well, Serena, you know, that's the big things in life. After hearing that, I'm going to go make another coffee. Good on you. Do that. And I tell you what, we're going to send you out some hell pizza, okay? They're now delivering, okay?

The girls at work will be happy about that. Yeah, the best pizza in this lifetime and next. You're going to have a good one. Thank you so much. Bye. Just a couple of dads screaming on the sidelines of their kids' sports games. Jono and Ben on the hits. Commonwealth Games starts tomorrow.

That's really crept up, hasn't it? And they've just announced that squash player Joelle King and shot putter Tom Walsh, New Zealand's flag bearers. So they're going to be walking out the opening ceremony tomorrow morning. Walshy and Kingy? Yeah, Joelle King, New Zealand's most decorated Commonwealth Games, one of the most decorated Commonwealth Games athletes. She's won six

medals, including three gold, and Tom Walsh won a couple of Olympics golds. She's won the golds at Commonwealth Games as well, so it's pretty awesome. How many medals did bloody old Devoy win? How many medals? Has Joelle done better than Susan Devoy? That's a good question, because I know Susan Devoy was

world champ for many, many years. Four times she was world champion. Don't know how many Commonwealth Games medals she's won. New events this year at the Commonwealth Games though. A T20 cricket for women's cricket and three-on-three basketball. Looks really cool. But there was really a couple of interesting things about Birmingham's Commonwealth Games.

They're aiming to be the first ever carbon neutral games. So they're offering free public transport. They want 0% waste sent to landfill. That's pretty... Where are they going to hide it all? Ship it off to China, I reckon. They're going to plant about 72 tiny forests across the West Midlands as well.

There's going to be more medals awarded to women this year than men, which is awesome. First time in history there's more women's events than men's events, which is awesome. It's going to cost about £778 million to put on the Commonwealth Games. Very expensive. 75% of that is paid by the British Government and the other part is paid by Birmingham, the town itself.

The producer Humphrey was saying also it's the biggest ticket sales for a Commonwealth Games of the last 20 Commonwealth Games. Yeah, exactly. A lot of people getting involved. The mascot, you'll see a lot of the mascot, Perry the Bull, was designed by a 10-year-old kid. That was just pretty cool.

Child labour? Free? Yeah. They pay him? I don't actually know. Do you know one of my highlights as a child, speaking of children being involved with the Commonwealth Games, the Commonwealth Games came to New Zealand in 1990.

Do you remember that? It was Auckland, right? That was why Mount Smart Stadium was built, where the Commonwealth Games. Commonwealth Games came to New Zealand in 1990. Do you remember that? That was Auckland, right? That was why Mount Smart Stadium was built, where the Warriors play. Or where the Warriors sometimes play. They're playing this week. Where the Warriors go and sometimes play. And I got to go to the dress rehearsal

of the opening ceremony, Benjamin Boyce, as a member of the Nigerian Commonwealth Games team. Oh, so you were pretending to be part of the team. Yeah, because they do a rehearsal and it's like, here comes Nigerian. You wave to everyone and you're like, I don't know. You would love that, eh? Oh, I loved it. I looked nothing like a Nigerian.

But yeah, that was a highlight for me. Susan Devoy retired. Oh, what? Oh, shit. Susan Devoy retired oh what? Oh shit Susan Devoy won no Commonwealth Game medals. Oh maybe they didn't have in the Commonwealth Games

before then. Squash wasn't there thank you producer Joel. Ah. That's interesting. There we go. So go Joel and go

oh no come on go New Zealand go Tom Walsh go many other great competitors out there for New Zealand. I won't start

listing the whole team. That's not that's going to take New Zealand. I won't start listing the whole team. It's going to take a while. I started fumbling at name number two. Your essential listening for non-essential banter. Jono and Ben on the hits. Jono, you've apparently got some great audio to play me. I'm very excited about hearing this.

This is great. This is a great story. Not to pull the curtain back too much, but I walked back in from being outside and you said, I've teased the hell out of the audio. Yeah, because you told me yesterday, you said, oh good, yeah, I love this. You said, have you got the audio?

Have you loaded it in? You're like, I haven't loaded it in our system. So a bit of a panic behind the scenes. We still haven't heard it, but you've gone away to another room, loaded it in, and now we're about to hear what this is, what's going on. Now listen, I hope hope i've done everything correctly i'm in a fluster i'm in a flap you can't tell though we're holding it together professionally uh friend of mine sent a

video now you know how a lot of houses nowadays they have a camera on the door a bit of a security camera so you can film you know people coming up to your house. And a courier driver was delivering a package. And he bent down to get the package. But as he bent down, he sat on a cactus that was in the porch. Okay, so it was a big cactus too. And this was all captured on the security camera. Have a listen. Oh, my God.

No, no, no. What the hell? No. Oh my God. Sorry. Oh, that's in there. And then he proceeds to take each of the needles out one by one going, oh no, oh no.

And it's one of those moments, you know, where you're talking to yourself out loud and you're like, dear God, I hope no one hears this. And it's been captured on security camera footage. So this is what I wanted to open this morning, mate. This is right up the guts stuff. Right up the guts phone or radio stuff, Ben Boyce. Right. What have you sat on?

What have you sat on? But you want, like, interesting. You don't want just, like, a comfortable chair or something like that. Yeah, oh, like a swivel stool. Yeah, no, some interesting stuff. So maybe it was a cactus. I know we had the chance of sitting on the Friends, the couch from the Friends show.

Oh, that's right. The actual couch. And to be honest, I'm not going to lie, it felt no different to sitting on any other couch. No, but because it was the couch from Friends, you're like, oh, this is exciting. Yeah yeah um you know every day on this radio show i um sit on the fence on i don't like to i don't like to upset upset people so i like to sit on the fence as far as topics go so that's what i do uh but but i would i was thinking about this uh that's

just today fm isn't it yeah i sat on on two pairs of sunglasses in the same week and broke both pairs. Because I was trying to be careful because I'm a bit of a shocker with sunglasses. I think you can copy and paste that statement. For everyone's a shocker with sunglasses. So I bought a pair and then when I left the car, I was like, no, no, I'll put them on the seat because I don't want to take them with us. I'll probably lose them. Came back, sat on them, broke them, ended up getting a new pair,

did exactly the same thing twice in one week. I'll put them on the seat. The spot where you literally go and notice when you came back. You know, you're just like, I'll put it in. But yeah, you go. So there you go. Actually, yesterday morning, I sat on something, and my life flashed before my eyes.

A toilet with the seat up. Have you done that? Yeah. It's pretty confronting, eh? Oh boy, it's confronting. It's just you and porcelain, baby. Mature, responsible, and considerate. Three words we sadly can't use here.

Jono and Ben on the hits. Talking about what you've sat on after an unfortunate incident where a poor courier sat on a cactus outside someone's house. And it was all captured on camera and then plastered all over the internet which I'm sure the courier's very happy about. Great text here, 4487.

Friend of mine sat on a car thief at the end of his road for about half an hour while he was waiting for the... Oh, so he caught the thief and then sat on it? He caught the thief, sat on him, he said my friend's not a lightweight, about 110kgs so it wouldn't have been a pleasant sitting experience for the car thief and waited until the police came along.

That's a good one. We'll get Tiana on. Welcome from Auckland, Tiana. How are you this morning? I'm good, thank you. How are you, boys? Oh, we're great, mate. It's lovely to have you on New Zealand's Breakfast with us.

Oh, thanks. Good to be here. What did you sit on, T-Dog? Workplace hazard. I sat on Play-Doh. Didn't know that I did that, And it turned into a white crossiness On my black pants I went to the supermarket

I went to the mall Was wondering where I was getting some funny looks And found out when I got home Couple hours later So you had like a white crustacean On the back of your trousers Yeah Sorry you said workplace hazard.

Whereabouts are you working? I'm an early childhood teacher. That makes a lot of sense. You'd come home with all sorts of war stains though, wouldn't you? Oh, I could tell you war stories for days, mate. Oh, we're going to send you out some hell pizza. Now delivering beer and wine so you can get some of that as well. Awesome.

Thank you so much. You guys have an awesome day. You too, mate. It's lovely to have you listening. We'll get Megan on. What have you said on, Megan? It wasn't me. It was a friend.

She was out on a very swanky cocktail night with a man that she'd just met and his fancy professional friends. They went to a bar after the do. She had a white strapless long cocktail dress on. Oh, you love a swanky cocktail evening. Yeah, yeah. So she was there, had quite a few drinks, had a bit of an upset tummy, thought, oh, oh, went to the bathroom, came back.

They were standing in a little group with their drinks, and everyone was like, oh, my God, what's that smell? And they were like, oh, I don't know. Oh, it's really bad. Let's move around the other side. So they moved a few times. And then someone looked at the back of her dress, and she had obviously not pulled her dress up properly in the toilet,

and it was just this massive brown stain. Oh, no. And she was absolutely mortified. Oh, you would be. Why are you telling me? She ran out absolutely just beside herself. And right in front of the window of the bar when they're all looking out, she hailed a taxi, put her arm in the air, and her dress came down. What an unfortunate series of events.

The dress fell off? Yeah, a series of very unfortunate events there. Is she okay with you? I mean, obviously you haven't named her. We don't know who she is, but you're like. Quite a few years ago. Laughs about it now? And she's got quite a good sense of humour,

so I'd like to think that after all this time, he would find a time or two now. Those are two low blows that the universe is... Yeah. The level one wasn't bad enough. The dress falling down. Why did the dress have to fall down? Together, they're the ultimate cluster, aren't they?

Oh, my goodness me. And so did the relationship continue on after that? No, no. It's like, let's relationship continue on after that? No, no. It's like, let's never see each other again. No, that person no longer existed. Yeah, no, fair enough. Good call. Yeah, well, sucker punch twice there, your poor friend.

Thank you very much for your call. No worries. Scrolling through your feed. All right, it's slow and it kind of makes sense, like Joe Biden. This is our news. What's going on, Ben? Well, the National Party leader, Christopher Luxon, well, he seems to be under fire

for what happened with his social media last week. Now, he was on holiday, because Parliament's having a bit of a break, or had had a bit of a break, and he went to Hawaii, went and holidayed in Hawaii, but then they posted on his social media something where he was in Te Puke, and it looked like...

Which is the Hawaii of New Zealand. You've often said that, right? I'm always saying, I was going to get a whole line of T-shirts printed and sell them online. Yeah, so he was in there, he went there, and it kind of, I guess, the video, which was filmed earlier, was posted on that day, and it kind of looked, I guess, in some ways, people were like, hey, you're not there.

And, I don't know, it doesn't seem like that big a deal, but for the opposition parties, they love it. Oh, they'd be fr parties, they love it. Oh, they'd be frothing over something like this. I mean, the amount of fraudulent stuff we're posting online, Ben. Yeah. Oh, we're shaming people every day. We're not even here right now.

So Deputy Prime Minister Grant Robertson, he had written some lines and when Parliament came back, he was ready for some zingers. Mr Speaker, mahalo, alohaa talofa and warm tepuki greetings to you all mr speaker former labour leader mike moore used to joke that if you can fake authenticity you've got it made sadly christopher luxon didn't realize it was a joke he took it as an instruction and mr speaker i've got bad news for the Leader of the Opposition. Kiwis can sniff that out a mile away. Can I, can I, I don't know if I've said this before.

How long did he spend writing his speech? I know. They could have been doing other stuff, running the country. Here's you go back to Mike Moore quotes.

I think he then goes on to say he's just read a book about the National Party as well and in here it says Chris Luxon's a cheap John Key. Sort out the country. Sort out the country. Sort out the country.

I mean, it's a great comedy routine. Oh, yeah, that's great. Go to the classic. Yeah. Oh, we'd have a laugh. Have a whale of a time. And then Netflix at the moment. You know, it seems like it's in most households around New Zealand,

but it has been losing a lot of subscribers recently. They reckon that worldwide they lost about 970,000 accounts in the last three months where they'll go mate disney plus i don't know yeah i guess people just tap it out for a wee bit but they're trying a few things overseas uh sort of cracking down on password password sharing so you can't share your password with multiple people so they look like they're trying that overseas and that might be coming to new zealand maybe at some stage they reckon and now they reckon they're going to be adding they're're trying this overseas, you have to

add a home function. So when you log in, that Netflix is kind of like locked to your home, your address. So then if you go anywhere else, or if it gets logged in anywhere else, you can't actually use it, except for like two weeks a year, you can change it to one address. If you go to your, if you've got a holiday home, as if Chris Luxon has gone to Hawaii or to Pukui or something. Can he use his Netflix account? For two weeks.

One location for two weeks for the year. I don't know. He broke out using Hawaii because it might be geo-blocked or something. Could he use it in Te Puke? Yeah, he goes to Te Puke for a couple of weeks, as he likes to do, for a couple of weeks. He could use it there and then go back to his home. Well, you weren't happy about the wider part of the Boyce clan

mooching off your password. Well, I don't mind it until you go to watch something and it's like such and such, and it blocks you from watching it. And then you have to get around the WhatsApp and go, hey, who's watching this? I want to watch something.

And they're like, yeah, I'm in the middle of this movie with Ryan Gosling. Just wait until I've finished it. Yeah. It's what is La La Land. It's really good. Yeah, no, you're right.

Well, you hear that? That's the sound of 975,000 more people leaving Netflix right now after that news, Ben. Yeah, for a while, they were pretty smug. They looked down on the TV industry and they're like, mate. Network TV's like, hey, we're here. We've been waiting. We're still battling away. We've been waiting with our commercial breaks.

You just wait. The Hits. With a long and extinguished career. Jono and Ben on The Hits. Now, the Master Singer is on TV. It started again on Sunday night on 3. And that's when they have outrageous costumes. They have people singing inside and celebrities.

And then you find out one by one who the celebrities are inside. And you got to be a guest judge on episode one. I did. I did. Yeah, it was, well, coincidentally, it was just filmed in Sky City at the casino where we park our cars. Were you just wandering around the casino?

I was just wandering around playing some pokies. And I go, mate, come on. 10.30 pokies. You want to judge a show? I was like, hold on, mate, just give me a couple more minutes. I think I'm going to claw my way back here on this machine. But you came out with some, I mean,

some outrageous guesses. I mean, you've got to be guessing celebrities that could be inside the costumes. I mean, that was your job to guess. That was my job. Can I just say, when they asked me to do it, I was honoured. And it was a really, really fun show to be a part of. Because it was just a fun show.

But my biggest fear was dancing. Because you watch the Masked Singer and the people who are the guesses or the judges or whatever have to dance to the music. And they got you dancing at one stage, I saw. Oh, I had to dance. And I had to dance to songs. And I was like, I can't even dance in a nightclub at 3am when there's a power cut.

You look very awkward, I'm sorry about that part. No, I wasn't happy about it. I think I even said it. I was like, there's my huge, yeah, I was anxious about having to dance. But like, this is my huge, yeah, I was anxious about having to dance. But then you made some, as you say,

outrageous celebrity guesses of who could be inside the costumes. Have a listen. I truly believe, and I'll eat this chair I'm sitting on, if that is not

former respected Prime Minister Helen Clark. And that is Clark Gayford and Jacinda Ardern, the Prime Minister of New Zealand, and unveil the mask because she needs to get back to running the country.

Plus, I've read TikTok, Clark needs to get home with that ankle bracelet. So let's get him out of here quickly. My other little Clark and Jacinda, Helen Clark, are they going to be inside novelty costumes? Honest? Do you want the honest answer? No, they're probably not. But I was told to throw out some guesses.

And you did. And don't say who I actually think it was. But I have been a bit of a deep dive into it. You know, there's a bit of publicity floating around for the Masked Singer at the moment. So I thought you'd be pleased I don't know if you've caught on to any of this but I

haven't read no I haven't caught on to any publicity so there was an article on the guest judges on stuff.co.nz a few weeks ago and they

went through no it was good it was a talk of Jono Pryor's one of the guest judges has a radio career includes 15 year stint 15 years at the rock

the edge now with the hits breakfast with fellow log longtime collaborator Ben Boyce do they say illustrious career they put a little award winning

radio host and TV presenter they said so they obviously this guy 15 years and then they were at Jono Pryor and then I'm like well they've spelt

your name wrong Jono P-R-Y-E-R not P-R-Y-O-R but you might have been around for 15 illustrious career for 15 years IO-R but you might have been around for 15, illustrious career for 15 years. I mean it's Maybe I've just been lingering for 15 years I haven't made an impact. I haven't made quite

the impact to it. It was all very good until they got your name wrong and then New Zealand Herald, they are, you know, this is the company we work for. This is our company If anyone should be giving you props. Favourable propaganda There's a review on episode one. It said last year's judges, James Roque, Sharon Casey are back with new judge, Anika Moore.

And a strange twist. We've got a guest judge for one night only. First night is the Hits Radio host, Jono Pryor. Illustrious. Spoke your name correctly, so that's good. 15 year career. Jono Pryor, who looks a little lost. Who looks a little lost.

And jokes, he's so bad bad he'll probably get the thing cancelled. That's all they say about you. Well, to be honest I completely agree with that review. The lights, they bamboozled me. I was like Grandad who had wandered away from the retirement village. But if you do want to see Jono

dancing on The Masked Singer, you can head to the It's Breakfast on Instagram. We've got a wee video up there right now. It's back on Sunday night, Masked Singer, if you want to go It's Breakfast on Instagram. We've got a wee video up there right now. And it's back on Sunday night, Masked Singer, if you want to go and catch it. Not me, though. You don't have to meet with my... Was that Barack Obama? Let's go. Jonah and Ben with five words for 5K. Stop any time to keep the cash.

Thank you. Or play on to win more. Five words for $5,000. You know how the game works. But right now, it's all thanks to Cure Kids. It's Red Nose Day on Friday, Cure Kids Red Nose Day. And you can help raise funds to help child research in New Zealand. Donate online at rednoseday.co.nz slash hits.

And for everyone that plays the game over the next couple of days, before Friday, we're going to give $500 to Cure Kids under their name. Yeah, that's what a generous gift. So we give them the option of taking the money themselves. No, they get the chance to play for their own money. That's separate. So they don't have the decision to look like an absolute monster by stealing $500. No. I would have preferred that option.

Let's get Mary on. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Mazza, how are you? Good, thanks. $500 to Cure Kids. How cool is that? That's under your name. Yeah New Zealand's Breakfast. Mazza, how are you? Good, thanks. $500 to Cure Kids. How cool is that? That's under your name. Yeah, that's cool. Hypothetically, if we said you can have $500 or give it to Cure Kids,

what would you have done? I think I might have kept it. No, but you've got the chance now to say, no, $500 to go to Cure Kids, under your name, and now it's your chance to win $500 or $5,000. Whatever.

All right, Mary? Yep. Okay, so who do you want to send into the South Proof booth, John or Ben? Ben. All right. Ben, he's a great guy. Lovely guy to send into the booth.

What's your favorite part about Ben? His height. His height? What is is height? That's a wonderful sweeping generic statement there, Mary. Okay, let's get into it. You know how the game works, don't you? Yep.

First word that comes into your head when I say Tweety. Tweety. Bird. Tweety bird. Chocolate chip. Cookies. Belly. B-E-L-L-Y.

Belly. Rub. Class. Belly B-E-L-L-Y Belly Rub Class Room And milk was the fifth word for you Mary Milk Shake We'll get Ben out

Ben Boyce welcome out of the Soundproof booth Mary was just saying how much All of the things she admired about you. Oh really? And your height was at the top of that list. Literally at the top of that list. Oh that's good. You're sitting about six foot are you? Yeah, I thought

like, yeah. It's a good height though Mary, you're right. Thank you Mary for those touching, touching words. You know he doesn't stand out in a crowd and he's not like and he wouldn't walk past you and go there's a short guy so that height's done him well Okay Mary, let's try and win you some cash

Okay, the first round Word one, $25 $25 up for grabs here Mary The first word that you need to match Ben is Tweety What do you think when I say tweety? Bird. $25, Mary. Hey. From the appropriately

highted Ben Boyce, would you like to advance on to another round? Yes, please. Okay, if I get this wrong, though, you get nothing, but let's pay for the next word. Yep, that's cool. Word two, $50. $50. Chocolate chip. Chocolate chip. Chocolate chip.

Cookies? Mary! Yay! You have 50 stingers sitting in that pocket. What are we going to do next, mate? Are you going to walk with 50 or go up? We'll go up. Word three.

$100. Belly. Belly. Belly? I'm still going to go random here belly rub rub the belly Mary sure we wanted to give your belly

a rub I was thinking belly rub we're thinking the same Mary that's $100 now we put it on the line for $500 do you want to take you going well we're going well $500, now we put it on the line for $500. Yeah, okay. Do you want to take it?

You going? You going? Yeah, well, we're going well. Jeez, go, Mary, go hard. Word four, $500. We've got $500 for grabs here. Now, this is also the same amount that you've donated to Cure Kids under your name too, Mary. Yep.

Class was the word, Ben. Class. What do you say when I say class? Room. Oh, Mary! Mary! $500. You've given that to Cure Kids.

You've also got $500 yourself. Now you need to decide. This is the big question. Do you want to play for five grand, knowing that you'll get nothing if I get this wrong? Or do you want to take your $500 and feel pretty good about the day? No, I'll go for five grand knowing that you'll get nothing if i get this wrong or do you want to take your five hundred dollars and uh feel pretty good about the day no i'll go for five grand oh my god the kahuna's on this woman oh my goodness five thousand dollars we're playing the round word five five thousand dollars ben boyce five grand on the line. Milk.

I'm going with the first thing pots on my head again, like rub. I'm going to go cows. Cows milk. No, Ben. Oh, no. Mary. Hit the five, Hundy. There's so many options. She went milkshake, which was another great option.

Oh, you played. No, that's cool. I love a game like this. Oh, good on you, Mary, for doing that. And good on you also for donating to Cure Kids as well, that 500 bucks.

You're going to have a great day, Mary. That was a good game. Thanks, guys. Okay, bye. Look out! Scary dinosaurs. Not Jurassic Park. It's these guys

Jono and Ben On the hits You know how you've got jobs Around the household That sort of cloud over you For a number of years Until you're like Oh well I've finally got to

Make the bed Or something Water blasting For me I did a lot A lot of water blasting And then when you go We're in the mindset

Of water blasting I did that On my first week of holiday And then we went away On holiday Everywhere I'd look I'd go Oh this place needs A good water But I'd find See areas of You know, I did that on my first week of holiday and then we went away on holiday everywhere I'd look I'd go, oh this place needs

a good water blast, I'd find, see areas of you know, like I'd just go, oh there's some mould up there If you want one rule in life it's don't start water blasting, because you just can't stop. Oh yeah, you always notice more There's always something, you know, there's always going to be something in this life that needs to be water blasted So best not blasting anything

No, I'm with you on that one But the thing, the job that was hanging over my head was clearing out, I reckon, 15 years worth of clothing. Like I've dropped the odd thing to the clothing bin, but in general I just sort of chuck it in plastic bins and put it in the roof. So I was like, okay, I'm going to clear out all of my clothing, which, to be honest, was just clothes mainly consisting of varying shades of black Metallica T-shirts.

I can imagine a lot of band T-shirts would have been up there. Now, I don't know if it's happened in your household, if it's the moisture in the roof and maybe the hotness of summer, but for some reason these shirts have shrunk on me. Like, I put them on now and they look like... The moisture in the roof. Yeah, it might have been moisture in the roof. I put on an old T-shirt from a couple of years ago

and I was like, oh, it's almost like a rash vest now. No, it must be. I'm gathering it's shrunk in the roof. Yeah. Is that what happens up there? Mate, I don't... Yeah, is that what I'm meant to say? I don't know.

Yeah, I'm sure that's what happens. But I gave a lot of those to my son. So now he's wandering around in Slayer t-shirts. He's burdened him with that. Does he realise what he's wearing for some of them or not? He does. Well, he plays a lot of Guns N' Roses on drums. Yeah, so he's happy to get a Guns N' Roses t-shirt.

I don't know how he was about the Slayer one. I haven't taken him to his first Slayer concert yet. So he looks like a miniature Bogan on his learner licence at the moment, Oscar. But what I did find, what I came across, now this is my point, came across, these would have been from about 10 or 15 years ago, some oversized baggy jeans and a big old baggy T-shirt.

Now, I'm looking at all the kids now. It's all come back out. It's come back in. Skinny jeans, they seem to be out. Thing of the past. You know, producer Joel, you know, you're young and trendy. Big and baggy is the way to go. Yeah, sort of.

Okay. I think it's definitely more trendy than a skinny jean, but I think just normal footed clothes is the go right now. For a while there it wasn't, though, it wasn't. Now it seems like it's, but anyway. So I thought, you know, listen, I'm a trendy mofo. Yeah, I might be 40, but Kanye, look at Kanye. What's he, 45?

Yeah. He's still doing all sorts. He's wandering around with a balaclava on his face the whole time. He's trending. He's pushing back. He's ahead of the trend. Yeah, exactly. So I was like, oh, this is the thing.

I've got the clothes that are on vogue, in vogue now. I'll put them on. I'll try them on. And I'll blend in with the Gen Zers. And so Poppy, who's our nine-year-old, she's kind of the fashionista in our house. She's like Anna Wintour. You're right. And I was like Okay I'll take this down to

I was wearing them I was wearing my oversized Baggy shirt Baggy jeans And a hat A bit of a Sideways hat looking thing And I went down

Confidence though Confidence Don't let people knock you Keep going through Let me mock you But don't let other people Mock you I want to see it myself

And I went down Because I was about to Head out and do some chores I was like I want to see it myself. And I went down because I was about to head out and do some chores. I was like, I'll go out looking trendy. Went down, I was like, what do you reckon, mate?

To Poppy. And she's like, dear God, take it off. Oh, really? It was a dear God, take it off. And I looked in the mirror

and I'm like, oh, I look like someone who's dressed up as Tony Hawk gone to a 50th birthday party. I looked... Oh, please wear it in. Please wear it.

I know why you want me to wear it in. I've got to give you some confidence, mate. Talk about your back. I look like, you know, how an old white guy would dress up and try and be a rapper. That was exactly how I looked. So I'll just stick to, you'll just stick to what I'm doing.

The Hits. Jono and Ben, the bold and the beautiful on The Hits. Note, may not be beautiful. Ross Taylor. Cricketer Ross Taylor, great black cap cricket player. We went to school at the same time for a wee bit until they discovered he was way better at cricket and then another school, I think, took him away.

Oh, so did you know Ross Taylor at school? Yeah, well, you know, he was at the same school. He was like, oh, this guy's an amazing cricketer and then he was very quickly swept off, I think, to another big school.

Did you ever play cricket with Ross Taylor at school? No, I didn't. I wish I did because, yeah, it would have been pretty cool. So we kind of know each other from school.

One of your bone of contentions is that Ross Taylor's up on the wall of achieving alumni from the school three times. His picture's up there three times. achieving alumni from the school. Three times. His picture's up there. Three times.

Yeah, on the back wall, which, you know, it was always my dream at school to go, one day I'm going to be on that wall. Haven't. Haven't got up on that wall, but he's got up there three times. Three times. It's like, yeah. Check his sympathy being voice up there.

Yeah, anyway. I think we even stopped off when we were filming something as a little, hey, we'll put this up as a gag, hoping that they'll keep it. They took it down. They took it down. We've got Ross Taylor here three times, mate. Well, we need that.

But I saw him when we were over the holiday period and we were traveling to the same place and I saw him, had a bit of a chat, which was nice. Oh, he would have enjoyed a punishing? Well, I tried not to punish him too much. How long was the punishing? Minute-wise, minute-wise? This was the thing.

I had a quick little chat to him at first, which is fine, and then I popped back to see him later. Oh, um oh god a double well i had a quick chat to him and then returned well there is i'll get to that in a bit but i embarrassed myself when i came back not meant to because i had already said to him congratulations on the book because i'd seen it advertised it's got a new book coming out congratulations on the book said that the first time around when i came back the second time for something i'll explain explain in a second, to punish him. He got out of his bag. He got out his book.

And he was like that. And handed it to you. And handed it towards me. And I went, I waved my arms away. No, no, no, mate. I can't take your book. I can't take your book. I'll pay for it.

I'll get a copy. And he used to look to me and he was like, oh no, I wasn't giving it to you. I was just wanting you to have a look at it. It's the demo copy of the book. I was like, oh God, I've really just... Why was I thinking, arrogantly thinking he was going to give me a copy of his book? I don't know, but you know, to be fair to you,

when you've said, hey, congratulations on the book, and you've come back, and then he's passing you a book, like, I can see how you've ended up there. Anyway, I was like, I don't want a copy of a book. Like, you're not going to go, oh, that's a demo copy. Are you? At no point would I ever think it was a demonstration copy well i probably made a lot of sense uh but then i uh because a friend of ours we were going to see it was her birthday and she's a massive cricket fan and i'd had luck would have it i'd bought her a black caps

cricket test top for her birthday because she loves cricket and there's a lot of the chances of seeing ross taylor at the same place can also like, what are the chances of seeing Ross Taylor at the same place? Can I also ask a question? What are the chances of her wearing that anywhere? A white black cap. We actually gave it to her. She wore it. She wore it? Yeah, no, she's a massive fan. You wouldn't wear it, but yeah, she's a massive fan.

And so I was like, what are the chances of seeing Ross Taylor, black cap legend? I'll come back. And this is why I came back. I was like, hey, mate. And that looked like I was giving him a gift. But I was like, can we open up this gift now? Here's what I've got. And he signed it for her, which was pretty awesome. But then halfway through, I was like, hey, mate. And that looked like I was giving him a gift. But I was like, we opened up this gift now. Here's what I've got.

And he signed it for her, which was pretty awesome. But then halfway through, I was like, God, dear God, she better love Ross Taylor because he put a big signature on the front of it. Oh, did he go across the front? I was like, maybe go on the back. And he was like, oh, no, mate. I always sign the front.

I was like, oh. No, no, mate. Here we go. And after book gate, I was like, I'm not going to argue with her now. So it was lovely It was lovely that Ross Taylor Took time Took time

He was awesome He got a double punishing From Bed Boys I came back And I'm like So sorry to punish you mate No he was so good about it So he's awesome

The thing with signing stuff Is I feel people get really Caught up in the moment You know So I did And I'm glad it worked Because as I said We gave it to her

on holiday and she wore it out the next night which was awesome so i was like great she loves ross taylor he was awesome but you're right sometimes you do you do you get swept up in the madness you're like oh my god it's vincent dave for the block sign my baby sign my baby you know you get home you're like oh i've got vincent dave written on the forehead of my baby you know the very few times we've been asked to sign stuff, kids will be like, sign across my school top. And I'm like, mate, I'm not Chris Hipkins, but I don't think the education system would appreciate Jono and Ben written across the front of, you know,

Taradale and Demediot's primary school T-shirt. But, you know, yeah, signing stuff. Yeah. Have you got stuff signed? Well, I've got my arm signed and tattooed from Lorde. That's still in there. That's right. That's still hanging in there.

That was swept up in the manners. We're at the Music Awards. Yeah, I got it signed and got it tattooed on the night. So you would love to know this morning. 0800 THE HITS, 4487. What have you got signed? Is it a cool thing? They're not afraid to use the F word.

Be family, friendly, fun. Jono and Ben on The Hits. We're talking about things that you got signed as well. We're just talking there. She mentioned Lorde. You got Lorde's signature along with your kids' names by your wrist there. Lorde, you're a beautiful third child. She's done well.

Yeah, she's done well. She's done better than the other two. They need to pick their game. My success so far, eh? Yeah. Indy, Sienna, if you're listening, be more like Lorde. She's your sister. They've got some time.

They've got some time. Yeah, they can do it. but I remember when we did that because we were hosting something and we were like we'll get Lorde to sign you and then we'll surprise her and say well we have signed it, we've got a tattoo artist here, we had a tattooist there and we'll get it tattooed on Ben

and that was our plan, Ben and me that was our plan going in, so we went up to Lorde she didn't know the plan. And we're like, Lorde, mate, can we get your signature? And she's like, yeah, sure you can. And she started writing her name on Ben's forehead. Now, I was like, yes. Because I know where this is going.

I know there's a tattoo. And then I was trying to get it off the forehead. Then she went to my neck and started signing the neck. And then you were like, yes. And I was like, neck, neck, yes. And she didn't know what the end out was. And I was like, and then you were like, yes. I was like, neck, neck, yes. And she didn't know what the end out was. I was like, hey, maybe it was on my wrist. I'd been thinking about getting the tattoo afterwards. Imagine if you had it, because you would have to commit to it.

It was live. And she didn't realise afterwards. She was like, oh, my God, you don't have to do this. I was like, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine. I would like you more if you had a Lord tattoo on your forehead. But yes, why don't you have your got signed?. I want to cross your forehead. But yes, what have you got signed? We'll go to the phones right now. Jo, welcome.

Oh, thank you. How are you guys? Happy Jo. I reckon you're the happy one around the office, are you? Yeah, yeah, I am. Good morale booster. I tried to boost morale around here. I was the butt patter, I like to call myself.

You know how you do that on the sports field, Jo? You're like, good on you, mate, and you slap the butt of it in a sort of motivating way. Doesn't stack up, doesn't stack up. Didn't stack up then and doesn't stack up now. Is that what you're doing to boost morale in your office? Oh, absolutely, absolutely. That's good, hands-on approach.

Hey, Joe, we were just talking about what you got signed. Oh, yes, I got a book signed by Elton John. By Elton John? Back the truck. Elton John book signed by Elton John. By Elton John? Back the track. Elton John. Wow. Where did you meet Sir Elton John? Well, I bunked off work, and I rang the boss,

and I said, look, I'm really sick. I can't come to work. So I went out to the airport and waited there. And back in those days, you could stalk stars without being in trouble, like you can do now. I'm pretty sure it was still illegal back then. And I waited at the airport and his plane was delayed. And so I waited there eight hours for his plane to come in

and he came through the door and he threw his arms up in the air and he said, you've been waiting for me. And I said, yes, I have been. And I'm trying not to faint, as you do, because I'm a big Elton John fan. And he came out and signed my book for me and he signed it to

Joe with love from Elton and it was like oh my god Were you the only one there? No by that stage there had been a gaggle of girls turned up and one of them came over when he was signing my book and shoved a piece of paper under his hand and he just moved it aside and went, I'm busy, and signed it.

And it was like, oh, so amazing. I love a gaggle of girls as well. Gaggle of girls can get a little out of control, can't it? It's so awesome that he was just flying to the airport that everyone else would fly on. He just came off the plane. I mean, it's incredible. And so did he look at you and say, you've been waiting for me? Yes.

Not to the gaggle. Now, hold on. Where were you he look at you and say, you've been waiting for me? Yes. Not to the gaggle? Now, hold on. Where were you in the gaggle when he said you've been waiting for me? Oh, I was standing in the middle of the door as he came through. It was just like, this is my one chance to meet my hero.

I'm going to take it. So I did. She was lead of the gaggle. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. Man, I would have done anything to see him. That was just incredible. But the funny thing was

there was a herald reporter there and a photographer and they took a photo of us and you were in the paper yeah and the reporter wrote about one woman who had stayed um eight hours waiting for elton john on the bus the next morning read the paper when i came in he said this is you isn you, isn't it? I went, yes, it was. Oh, so you got busted. Oh, Jo, I mean, it's hard, you know, when there's photographic evidence on the front page of the paper, it's hard to deny. Absolutely, absolutely. That is a great story, Jo. You're going to have a great day.

Really appreciate you phoning through. Yeah, yeah, will do. Thank you. The Great Pineapple Debate. Thanks to Hutton's with the new Hawaiian Sizzler. Cheese and pineapple love affair, the new Hawaiian Sizzlers. They're here for a limited time only, so get them quick and get them while you can. And right now, thanks to the new Hawaiian Sizzlers, we've each got a pineapple.

Jono's got one. I've got one, a little plastic pineapple. We open it up. We've got money inside. I don't know how much you've got. You don't know how much I've got. It could be anywhere from $1,000 to $1,000. And you've got to decide on, oh, 100 of the hits,

whose pineapple you want. And it's our job to try and convince you to pick each other's pineapple, our own pineapples. Do you know someone texted in? We're talking about pineapple and cheese. Someone texted in about the glorious vintage dish from the 90s. Yeah, pineapple and cheese toasted sandwich. Oh, yeah.

Jeez, it was a classic. And then it just disappeared from our lives. Well, it's back in sausage form. Even better. There you go. It sounds delicious. We say it's like having Hawaii inside your mouth with these sizzlers. We're going to get Jenny on from Tauranga.

Welcome. How are you? Hi. Good, thank you. Now you're a sales rep. You're hocking off stuff around the Bay of Plenty, are you? Hi, good, thank you. Now you're a sales rep. You're hocking off stuff around the bay of Plenty, are you? You betcha. Good on you, Jimbo.

Okay, well, let's see if we can hock off our pineapples to you. Ben, you can take the lead. Well, yesterday I came in saying I wasn't feeling very good, and I only had $50, and they chose me. You thought I was doing reverse psychology. I feel a bit better today. I feel good. I feel good.

I feel it's a bit better. So I'd say if you pick me, you shouldn't leave too disappointed unless Jono's going to come in and wow everyone with how much he's got. Jenny, how many houses have you got? Half a house. Oh, wow.

I can tell you what, you could have a full house with what I've got here. It's only $1,000 to $1,000. It depends how big the house is. You want some house? You don't say it was a Lego house? Oh, a Lego house you what, you could have a full house with what I've got here. It's only $1,000 to $1,000. It depends how big the house is. You want a house that's as big as a Lego house? Oh, a Lego house? Oh, okay, a Lego house.

You could probably get a... You could afford a Lego house. I'm looking at this figure right now, and I'm looking into Ben's eyes. You're a shocking poker player. He's got no confidence. Jenny, you think? I'm feeling okay. I'm feeling okay.

You see, you're not that self-confident. No poker player goes in, you know what about these? I'm feeling okay.'m feeling okay See you're not that self confident No poker player goes and you know what about these I'm feeling okay What do you think guys? I was looking at their hand going

maybe no maybe not Yeah you're quite good you're quite good Yeah Jenny if you don't pick me

you're going to regret this Oh we're going to regret it You're going to regret it for the rest of your life I don't know how long you've got left to live but every day you'll be like

why did I pick that Jenny alright you're going to regret you've got left to live, but every day you'll be here. One day a little bit. Jenny, all right, you're going to regret it. It's over to you. Whose pineapple do you want? Okay, I'm going to pick Ben. Oh, I have got for you $300. Woo-hoo. That's pretty good.

That's good. That's good. Thank you. It's not a full house, though. What? Not a full house. I had 550, Jenny. Oh, I didn't know.

That's all right. That's okay. I don't mind. Well, I tell you what, we don't mind having you on our show either, Jenny. It's not our show. Oh, it's lovely. It's your show. It's the people's show.

No, it's your show. No, no, it's your show. Let's not argue over whose show it is. When our boss is saying we do a terrible job, it's your show. It's the people's show. No, it's your show. No, no, it's your show. Let's not argue over whose show it is. When our boss is saying we're doing a terrible job, it's your show, Jenny. Oh, okay. Just so you know, we're throwing you under the bus quite a lot. Have a great day.

Thank you so much for listening. Enjoy that $300. If they were the internet, you'd want to clear this history. Jono and Ben on the hits. Producer Joel is now with the team. It's awesome to have you here, Producer Joel. And now because, you know, we're part of the team and, you know, we know each other, I've now started following Joel on Instagram.

Which is an interesting proposition because, Joel, we have known around the building for, you know, two and a half years, but only now that he's in your inner circle. I feel sometimes a bit weird, you know, like a bit all mates following you know i don't know you know i feel like sometimes i feel yeah so i feel like i'm at the stage you're following all the girls in sales and stuff you're such a lawyer just a bit of a thing before this as well i know producer juliet had the same drama but jono still doesn't follow me as well so just just just putting it out there and you're giving me yeah you're gonna work hard to get a follow from me mate so now i feel like we're in a comfortable space and follow each other i follow you you know and it's great you know like we can and and so what i because i went to a direct

messenger about something in the dms and what must have popped up directly because i'm a shock at checking um direct messages as well particularly for people that I don't follow. I went, oh, I've got a message from Joel. What are you in here? And then I looked at it closely and it was from October 31st, 2017. Oh my God, five years ago. Five years ago. How old were you five years ago?

17. 17? Last year of high school. Okay. So the message was, hey Ben, I go to St. Peter's College in Auckland. Friday is our last ever day at year 13, so I'm making a Leavers video. Wondering if you could please do a short clip

wishing the St. Peter's Leavers of 2017 the best for everything. And this monster. Thanks heaps, Joel. I'm sorry, I genuinely did not see that until like about two days ago. And can I give full credit to you, Joel? This is some commitment to getting a video filmed.

Exactly. You've finished school. You've gone through broadcasting school. You worked in this company as an intern for two years. Finally, you get to this man, and now you can get your video done. Well, yeah. I think I'm a bit late. I think I'm a bit late.

Five years late, right? Yeah, so a little bit late. I'm sorry I didn't see this message five years ago. I would have happily done it. Is it too late to get the gang back together? You know know do one more year of school hey guys all the

best for you but how many other people did you send this to there was quite a lot I don't want to make you not feel special but

there was about 50 people you were spammed a lot of sports players a lot of warriors players a lot of influencers did anyone get

back to you there was like two people that got back to us I feel bad that I didn't but who's a better person than me? there was Bryn Hall he was an ex-St. Peter's boy

he plays for Crusaders yeah he had a great message there was like some other some other like inspiring message sort of social media dude who sent like a

three minute video back it was really nice of him but we were kind of only looking for a ten second one we were like just let that down a little bit and this monster now's your chance

to get your message what message did you need why don't you give your message me I haven't prepared a message shoot it now roll up I'll roll up

10 seconds I'll be like all the best I'm sure you're going to have amazing careers maybe I'll even work with one of you in the future no that's probably

a bit predictive don't be like me I'd probably say something like that some self depreciating thing yeah and stay in school until that finishes

up on Friday I'm glad he didn't get a message to you I know it was alright would you have used that yeah we didn't actually make up I ended up even

using the video oh you didn't even use the video here I am feeling bad that for five years I left you hanging don't worry it's not all that bad.

Well, if you do want a video from Ben, make sure you DM him today. You'll be doing all sorts of videos. That's right. Anyone wants to, I'll check my DMs later on today. The Hits. For more podcasts from The Hits Network, check out iHeartRadio.co.nz.