Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: One Of Our Listeners Has Experienced The Tinder Swindler!

Episode Date: February 16, 2022

But an NZ version... What the Tinder Swindler did to many woman overseas, basically happened to one of our listeners. But all in NZ! And if you don't know who the Tinder Swindler is, it's the hottest documentary on Netflix at the moment and worth a watch. Jono has realised he is getting old, and Ben has learnt how to finally calm his dog Beau down. Enjoy!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits with the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome, 17th of Feb, this is the podcast. What's the last podcast you've listened to that isn't this podcast? I got caught listening to this podcast. You did actually, yeah, busted listening to the podcast. Highly embarrassing. Are you listening to yourself, they said to me? Oh God, they said it in a tone as well.

It'll be an NBA podcast. Yeah, so it's not very, even as I say it out loud, I'm probably putting a lot of people, I'm putting myself to sleep. But one thing I did notice about, you've got to check about your podcast, is if you kind of go, I like that one, and you sign up to it, if they're prolific like ours, geez, it clogs up a lot of your phone. You've got to go through and, you know, it downloads every day. Yeah, well, the problem is with the NBA, there's basketball games only

in two minutes. I know, exactly. There's a lot of basketball. So I was clearing through the other day, I was like, jeez, there's a lot of podcasts on there that I haven't listened to because I haven't got around to it. What do they talk about on that? Just like, oh, there's players doing this. Yeah, players and games and trades. Oh, mate, why don't you deep dive into that? You're a fun guy. Yeah,

fun, fun. What about yourself? What, are you listening to any other podcasts? No. Arrogantly listening to my own one? No, I do like the ones about serial murderers and things like that. Oh, yeah. You kind of get into those ones, don't you? Yeah.

There's a few of those out there, those sort of podcasts. Yeah. Yeah. I'd say the last podcast of any note that I listened to was probably Conan O'Brien. Conan needs a friend

or something. Conan needs a friend and he just talks to a whole bunch of famous people under the guise that he's trying to make a friend

and he did one with Barack Obama and I found that rather interesting. Yeah. I'm just saying that just to make me appear more intellectual

than a guy who just listens to an NBA podcast. It's kind of cool these days though and I do forget about it all the time about

even with books you've got the audio version of them too I was just saying something I put online before they just listen to Will Smith's book

that I'm reading I'm really enjoying but I'm slow I'd get through it a lot faster if I was listening to it save your eyeballs your eyeballs must be

sore and tired just from moving side to side. But then my wife always says, I read three books over the last two weeks. And you're like, she listens to them. I'm like, did you read them? She's a school teacher. It was Harry McCleary. Three times over. True, true. The thing I like about podcasts is

when you hear people like presidents and people that we look up to in our industry being voice Boyce, your Kimmels, your Kevin Hart. When you hear them talk, you're like, oh, they're just doing exactly the same thing and encounter exactly the same situations as all of us mere mortals do. Yeah. Except they're just earning billions and billions of dollars. But you're right. You look at these people and you kind of almost don't feel like they're human.

You're like, they're so successful, they'd never get what? You know, like Will Smith in his book was talking about how he kind of created a character, Will Smith, because he is quite insecure and got anxiety. You know, he's not as confident as he would be. But he's created this persona. He's created this, you know, that is obviously based on some of the things he's really good at, like being funny and all that sort of stuff. But he's also, yeah, just like everyone, he doubts himself from time to time as well,

which is kind of, you're right, you forget about that. You feel like these people are like, oh, they wouldn't worry about that, you know. But they have the same sort of worries. So that's what I like about him. Well, not the same sort of worries. They're probably not worried. Listen, he's not worried about paying his bloody R&D bill, mate. The lawn guy's coming over.

I think the law smith's going to be good for it. He's like, oh, jeez, have I got that $25 this week? Yeah, yeah. He's not the same sort of worry. Yeah, like his petrol light's definitely not on right now. And if it is, I don't know if he's even filling it up, is he? He's probably got a driver. Hey, have a great day.

Enjoy the podcast. We'll catch you tomorrow. Jono and Ben. Jono and Ben, if you love the Super Bowl halftime performance with Jay-Z, he has a lot to do with it. He's sort of in charge of putting it all

together. Oh yeah? Yeah. Rock Nation, which is his company, puts the Super Bowl performances together. He's in there

bloody screwing the stage together, getting the refreshments, toweling them down. You guys want a towel? You're all right for it, you know?

I don't think it's quite that bad. Stress it out. And then Ben Humphrey, producer Humphrey or so, he actually wrote the lyrics to Still Dre, Still DRE. As he did. And Dr. Dre says he had never written his own verses.

Legendary producer, not much of a writer. Right. Much like me. Legendary radio announcer. No, no, not really. Not much of a person. Is that what he's saying? Is that where you're going with that?

Yeah, that's exactly where I was heading with it Now Omicron, it's a thing Yesterday, what is it? Over 1100 cases in the community Our highest by far, record numbers Yeah, wonderful numbers It's spreading, it feels like If it hasn't arrived around

Wherever you are, it's only a matter of time Yeah, you know someone who's only a matter of time. Yeah, you know someone who's got it. But the thing is, I just give up. Actually, take some time out. Like, it's here. How are you going to control it? You can't.

It's out of control already. They're trying to slow it down, aren't they? How's that going for them? Yeah, I don't know if it's going as well. What's the point of slowing it down? I guess not to overwhelm the hospital system Because if everyone gets it at once Then the hospital's going to be overloaded But if they sort of drag this process out

Is it like my anti-aging moisturiser? Just trying to slow At the end of the day you know it's not going to work But you just You know what the end result's going to be? Disaster Absolute Fiasco

That's a very good example Just trying to slow the process I wouldn't say it's that good of an example Really good actually Big disaster. Absolute fiasco. That's a very good example. I was just trying to slow the process. I wouldn't say it's that good of an example. It's really good, actually. It's just an example. No, it was a great example. Legendary radio announcer. Terrible person.

But I want to do a little bit of a sweepstakes. Who's going to get it first out of us? Oh, don't do this. Now, you can pitch your case. All my numbers are in on Producer Julia. Oh, excuse me. I was wondering if I was going to be involved in this little sweepstakes. Yeah, just you look like you would go to disease-y locations.

No, she doesn't look disease-y. But you don't know, you just don't know what you're going to get. No, I understand that. When actually you mentioned the other day, oh, we should do a sweepstakes of who will get COVID first. I wanted to open it up to the audience. Ben was less enthusiastic. Yeah, I was kind of like, oh, I wouldn't a sweepstakes of who will get COVID first. I was thinking, I was like, I want it to open up to the audience. Ben was less enthusiastic about it. Yeah, I was kind of like, oh, I wouldn't be surprised if they say me

because I'm young, I go out a lot. All I do is go here and home. You can be as careful as you want. That's the thing. Yeah, that's so true. The orange sanitiser over there is probably going to... I probably will. I try to be careful, but you're right, I'll be the first one.

And you just don't, you know. It's hard to control. It is. Yeah. You can see why careful, but you're right. I'll be the first one. And you just don't, you know. It's hard to control. It is. Yeah. You can see why they're trying to do it. Can you get it more than once? Or once you've had it, your body's built up the immunity? I think it can, right?

But I think it's... Prince Charles has had it twice. I think maybe there's like a six-month sort of period that you're like immune from it, but then you can get it again. You're right. Prince Charles had it twice. I think Prince Charles had Delta, then Omicron. It'd be interesting to see if you could have Omicron twice or Delta twice.

Yeah, well, he's done the two-header. He's looking for the three-peat, Prince Charles, when the new variant comes out. Well, listen, we'll keep you up to date if we get it. Yeah, I'm sure you'll know. I haven't been scanning in. That's probably not going to bode well because Ashley yesterday, she's like, keep scanning in.

But I'm like, why? What's the point? I love it how you give it up. You're just like, keep scanning in. But I'm like, why? What's the point? I love it how you give it up. You're just like, year three. I have checked out. And I know that's the feeling for a lot of people. You know, like we're all over it. I'm sick of all the information.

I'm just like, it's here. Or, you know, we were just talking off air before. Huge event in America. Gone completely COVID restriction free, which we'll tell you about shortly. Yeah, I know. Huge event. You don't even have to be vaccinated to go to this event. You're right. We'll bring you that news in Spy before 7 o'clock. Scrolling through

your feed. Yes, Ben Boyce about to whip out his bulletin and wave it all around. What have we got, Ben? Well, word or something that's taken over the world, everyone seems to be talking about. Producer Juliette's suddenly interested. It's amazing how suddenly she's like, She literally popped up like a meerkat. She did.

But a lot of people online, particularly on Twitter, are complaining that since it was sold, the game was sold to the New York Times, that it's been a lot harder. Now, you play it every day. Would you agree with that or not? Yes.

Okay, so the word yesterday was a word that was not in my vocabulary or any of my friends or any of my families yeah it was got to the point where you actually had to like get your options in google to see what was an actually actually a word so it's either one or two things either you know some people saying that it feels like they've just opened the dictionary and gone there's a five letter word i'll put that in and it's an actual word or that's just the fact that they've used up probably a lot of the easier five letter words and now they'd be struggling.

Exactly. Yeah. So, yeah, I got it in the end, but I took my time. Can you say it now? Yeah, I think I can. Yesterday's one? Yeah, yesterday's one. It's caulk, C-A-U-L-K.

What is caulk? I think it's like some sort of PVA type of glue. Oh, come on, Wordle. I know. This is where we all turn on Wordle. We all turn on Jacinda. You have a good run for a bit, eh? Unfortunately, Wordle's run was about two weeks,

and then the world's starting to go dark on it. What is coal? It is a glue. So it's a material used to seal joints or seams against leakage in various structures and piping. You could use it in your shower, in your bathroom. A lot of articles on this. That's not even a word. Twitter users

rage at Wordle. It's leaving players stumped. Oh really? Some upset people around. Just quickly, there was a TikToker in California. So a year ago, so it's Valentine's Day this week, a year ago on Valentine's Day, he

started a bit of a fund for his Valentine's present. He put aside around about 400 pounds for a gift he was going to buy his partner. But he decided every time they had an argument, he was going to take a dollar away from it. Does she know about this? Well, she does now. I don't know if she did over the year because he's put it on TikTok. And this year for Valentine's Day, he had around about 40 pounds from close to 400 pounds for the gift. So really, they've had a tumultuous year.

A lot of people say there's a few red flags potentially in their relationship. Yeah, nearly had $400 worth of arguments. Yeah. But what justifies one? Is it like, you didn't put the dishes on the dishwasher? I don't know that one. I don't know.

Yeah, you're right. And you just have that secret smug satisfaction every time you're having an argument going, keep going. Yeah, yeah. Keep going.

I'll take five off that. And that is scrolling through your feed this morning and next. I'm trying to, I'm crumbling. As a parent, I'm crumbling

and we'll talk more about this next on The Hits. The Hits. Jono and Ben. We're talking a little bit about parental threats, the threats that you make as a parent, and sometimes you follow through and sometimes you don't.

Yeah, they slowly start to have less and less impact as time wears on, don't they, the parental threats? Device free days is something that my wife has started to implement in our household. You weren't 100% behind device free day because you were always on your device. Yeah, I'm like, surely I don't have to be part of that. So is it for everyone? No, I think I get exemption

by trying to limit my device stuff. He doesn't have to apply to that mandate. But yeah, but also with the kids as well, I struggle as well when it's a device free day and you're kind of, you know, like, you're in the middle of something at work and they're like,

can we just do this? You're like, yeah. And it's like, it know, you're in the middle of something at work and they're like, can we just do this? You're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, and it's like, man, it's not device free day. You're like, oh, yeah, I guess you're right, you know. And then the other thing I like to do as well on device free day is show the girl something on my phone. I'll go, hey, look at this. And then I'll go, oh, you looked at the device.

That's a little prank life for my kids. A little bit of bullying of children there. That's always enjoyable. How many device free days are you having a week? Oh, we try and do a couple of days a week. Wow. They must be bleak days. Yeah.

Yeah. If anything, I miss the Roblox conversations. It is funny with the threats, isn't it? And I know Annie, one of her favorite ones was god give me strength and when i heard god give me strength i was like for a while there was she's going to turn into one of the avengers know what happens but eventually you figured out well she's not busting out of her clothes and turning into the hulk so god gives me strings nothing but for a while there it was purely terrifying we talked yesterday about those uh the parents make, and sometimes they follow through and sometimes they don't.

We got some great calls. My brother, a bit older than me, so I was probably about six. He would have been about 12, and he really wanted this little toy car from the warehouse. Told me to put it in my pocket while we walked around, and then my mum found out as we walked out the store, walked back in, made them call the police, and they did a fake charge on me. My oldest son was about five. Then my mum found out as we walked out the store, walked back in, made them call the police,

and they did a fake charge on me. My eldest son was about five. He wasn't tidying up his bedroom, so I told him that all the toys were going to go in the bin, and he still didn't do it, so I put all his toys in the bin bags, put them out on bin day, but went and got them before the bin man came round and hid them in the shed. And then every time he was good, I'd go and get one and say that the dead man had brought it back to me. There we go. So the police there having nothing to do,

charging a six-year-old with that. Did you remember, like, if you were at home with one parent, for example, if I was at home with my dad, and he'd be like, wait till your mother gets home. Wait as if whatever was going to happen. But then, you know, mum gets home, she's had a long day at work. She can't be bothered. Dad's updated her.

He's like, oh, you deal with that, you know? It's always one of those threats that you make as a parent. Actually, 0100 the HATS or 4487 on the text. SMS charges do apply for texts. They do. What are those SMS charges? Your normal charge. If you pay for your texts or if it's part of a plan, that applies. That's what happens.

But what's the threats that you make as a parent? Do you follow through on them or do you not? We'll have those calls after the beeps. It's Bieber, Ghost, it is the hits. Jono and Ben, 6.31. We're talking about threats that parents make. Sometimes they follow through, sometimes they don't follow through. That's what happens when you're a parent.

Yeah, and it just comes down to laziness, doesn't it? And for a while there you do have a lot of punch though, don't you, with threats. You're like, jeez, I've got these kids running scared. Don't make me come in there. Now they realise if you come in there, what are you going to do? Nothing. Nothing. Just ask again.

Just go, hey, guys, just don't do that. You know, that's all we're going to do. Don't make me come in there. Come in there. Hey, guys, please don't do that. You know, that's, you know. That's, you know. It's kind of like the same power

The government has over the protesters at the moment No, they're not listening, no one's listening We'll tell your cars Fair enough Got Aaron on 0800, what happened mate? Well mate, we went for the good old If you don't behave in the back of the car You'll walk home

And it kind of backfired on us We had a five year old and he was misbehaving in the back of the car and we said, if you don't behave, put you out of the side of the road and you can walk home. We're about a K and a half away from home. Yeah, which feels like sort of a Forrest Gump-like distance walking across America for a five-year-old. Yeah, so he carried on misbehaving and we pulled over

and we told him to get out. So he gets out of the car and there's about a corner about 100 metres away. So we went and hid around the corner and said, I will wait for him to get here and pick him up. So he arrives at the car and we put the window down and said, right, boy, get in the car. And he's like, nah, I'm walking home. And we're like, no, you're not getting in the car.

And another little five-year-old is like, nah, you told me I'm walking home, so I'm walking home. Are you carrying on walking? And you know how fast five-year-olds walk? It took us about an hour and a half to get home. So you're slowly following him in your car. Yeah, he got us. He's probably doing it even slower too,

just to make you guys no longer. That's great. Good on you. That's great. That reminds me of the, I'll turn this car around as well. Oh yeah. Which is a huge inconvenience

for the parents. It's like well they want to go to the Coromandel on holiday. They don't want to turn around halfway on the Hauraki Plains. They're halfway there.

Yeah you're right. They can be stubborn little buggers at that age. Yeah good on you Aaron. You have a great day mate. Okay guys. Text 4487 as well here from Hannah who says they kept telling their daughter if she was naughty, the Easter Bunny wouldn't provide chocolates

and only potatoes, which I think is the job of a leprechaun in Ireland. I don't know. And Easter rolled around and the behavior wasn't on point and the potatoes came aplenty. Really? The Easter Bunny delivered? Wow. deliver wow great great carbs potatoes they provide as well and the other thing is too kids what they realize they do have a lot of power and my son oscar has almost as a sixth sense of humor as i do and so i pick him up from school

and i'm waiting at the gate and he's like no i won't go with you i don't want your lolly that's his joke and he's saying it out loud he's like who's this strange man offering me lollies i'm like mate this is you don't realize how much trouble this could get me in geez hey uh tom walsh olympian shot putter he's awesome and uh but what does he eat what does he lift in the gym? Those questions and more will be answered with Tom Walsh in just a few moments on the hits. Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. On the hits, Jono and Ben. Tom Walsh, he's an Olympic bronze medalist,

two-time world champion for shot put. Amazing athlete. He is. He's going to be in action at the Sir Graham Douglas International one-day event of athleticism and fit people. That's this weekend. You can catch it on Sky Next on YouTube. And Tom Walsh, welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast.

Hi, guys. How are you? Lovely to have you on, Tom. T-diddy? T-dog? Can I go with a nickname? You can go with whatever you want. Okay, T-dog.

We'll roll with that. Tom, it's lovely to have you on the show. Yeah, mate. Thanks for having me on. I don't think I've been on before, so yeah, it's good to be on. Well, now we've got your cell phone number. Watch out. Maybe I might have to change it after this call.

Yeah, burn the phone. It's probably for the best. Hey, Tom, when did you realize that you could throw stuff far? When did that little light bulb go off in your head? I was always pretty good at it. I kind of did it as a young kid, 8, 9, 10. And I was always a bigger kid at school. So, you know, I always got stuck doing the throwing events.

And I was always okay at it, but I never thought I'd go towards, you know, throwing shot put for New Zealand. I thought, you know, like every Kiwi kid from a farming background, that I'd be a rugby player or a cricket player. So, you know, I think I might kid from a farming background, that I'd be a rugby player or a cricket player. So, you know, I think I might have picked the right one, though. And now, though, do your friends use it to their advantage? Like, hey, Tom, chuck us a beer? You know, you're the guy that can do that, right?

Yeah, they ask me to – some of my mates want me to throw – like, I've thrown one of my mates who's about 55 kg, so, you know, like, they always want me to do stuff like that. Yeah, that seems like something that we would get you to do if we were your friends as well. So your personal best is 22.9 metres. Now, how heavy is the actual shot put? It's a bit over 7 kg, so 16 pounds for the older people out there,

but 7.26 kg. So you've shown that nearly 23 metres, which is enormous. Yeah, it's longer. To give it some perspective, it's longer than wicket to wicket on a cricket pitch. Pretty big heave. Yeah, and so what makes one throw any different from the other one that you do? Like this 22.9 that you got, why were you on fire that day? Oh, your guess is as good as mine.

No, look, it's a huge timing thing for me and freshness. So some days things are just all clicking. And that day in 2019 things were clicking alright. But I still want to throw further than that. I'm still young enough to throw

further than that. I still want to. Tom, whilst you're talking about your training. I was looking on your Instagram. You're lifting weights and the bar is bending. How much are you benching? Let's talk stats. What are you benching? I've benched 240. Oh, you're not bad.

Yeah, not bad. I've squatted 320. Also, the scariest thing is, guys, I'm pretty weak for. Oh, yeah. So, you know, it's... And also the scariest thing is, guys, is I'm pretty weak for a shot putter. You know, there's a guy out there, Darlan Romani, Brazilian guy. He benches 320. So he benches while I squat.

Oh, my gosh. What are you eating? What do you have to eat to, you know, give yourself the fuel to throw shot putts and lift all those weights? Yeah, so I try to eat like five meals a day and that's about 5,000 calories.

The average person's intake is about 1,500 to 2,000 calories a day if you're in shape and so forth. I'm trying to eat double that, if not a little bit more to one, keep my 135 kgs on, but also you've got to feed the beast as well and you've got to recover.

Can you just eat anything or it has to be a specific type of food to keep that weight on? No, look, I'm pretty strict on my diet, so I know exactly kind of what I need, whether it's carbs, proteins or, you know, anything else. So it is a pretty strict diet, but, you know, the joys of being 135 kgs is, you know, one or two nights a week, I'm allowed a scoop of ice cream, you know, it's all right. Now, just before we go, I've Googled shot put jokes, okay? And believe it or not, there's not a deep back catalogue of shot put jokes. This is a market designed for Tom Walsh though, right? It is, yeah.

This is your sweet spot. All right, yeah, hit me. Tom, I'm developing a new sport which involves a baseball, a shot put, a discus and a javelin. It's called the Game of Thrones. I feel like you can come up

with something better yourself, I reckon. I reckon that's what we should focus in on, shot put comedy. Maybe that's where we've been going wrong Tom Walsh really an honour to talk to you you're one of the great New Zealanders congratulations on all the success you've had and much more to come no doubt

and you just keep on eating and throwing stuff mate Tom Walsh what a wonderful New Zealander he is why can't you be more like Tom Walsh. What a wonderful New Zealander he is. He's awesome, man. Why can't you be more like Tom Walsh? I wish I could. Yeah, I could too. You're more like a javelin.

He could throw me quite far. Hey, we've got some spy entertainment news on the way. Yeah, an event that has dropped every single COVID restriction you can imagine. I'll tell you next. It is the hits. You've got John and Ben. Dealing with your friends. Breakfast isn't bad.

The things I would do. Baby, I'll be gone long gone 6.60 long gone of course if you missed yesterday the 6.60

Saturday's tour has been postponed until the end of the year against my advice I said boys plow on through well they couldn't

they couldn't do it for like 100 people socially distanced so it's going to all happen at the roundabout October onwards. Spy. Know what's up. Spy.co.nz. Now hand you over to our boss of Goss, Juliet.

What's happening in Spy? So Coachella has dropped all COVID restrictions for their festival. They've taken your advice on that one, Jono. Yeah, good. They got my message there. So it's happening during April, but you don't need to wear a mask. You don't need to provide a negative test, and you don't even need to be vaccinated to go. It's literally free for all.

Super super event vibes. They get a huge amount of people, right? Oh, yeah. They go to Coachella. So this happens in the desert over in America. It's like a couple-a-day festival. It happens over three or four weekends, doesn't it? Or two weekends?

It happens two weekends, but it's the same line-up over a Friday, Saturday, Sunday, but then just repeated the next week. I guess organisers are probably just hoping that, you know, any patrons, whatever they're putting into their system, will kill the virus. Whatever they're ingesting will outsmart the virus. Well, we've got our own little 10-day festival going on here outside Parliament, don't we?

Yeah. Soak Challa. Thanks to the sprinklers. Free camping. Yeah, so Harry Styles, Billie Eilish, Kanye as well, or some of the artists that are going to be performing at Coachella this year. And Swedish House Mafia. I love Swedish House Mafia. You sound like you'd like Swedish House Mafia. It'd be something Juliet would like. Don't you worry, don't you worry, Chaka. Oh, is that that? Yeah!

Heaven got a friend for you. Have you, you at Coachella, I would be gravely concerned for your well-being. Yeah, I know. I think that's why I'm not going to go

and I'm just going to stay away from that situation. She doesn't trust herself. Yeah, I don't trust myself. And the Tinder swindler, big documentary on Netflix at the moment. He's been revealed to be a massive con man, conning a bunch of women on the dating app for money. Out of millions and millions of dollars, this guy.

Yeah. So he is now, if you haven't watched it, I recommend it. It's about a two-hour documentary, but it's worth it. It's not like you have to commit to a whole season of hour-long episodes. He is now on the video at Cameo. You know the one where if you want a shout-out from a celebrity, you pay a certain amount of money and they

do a specific video and send it to you. Yeah, they can do like a birthday message. Cameo we've used for our evil purposes before, haven't we been, boys? Remember we got Fran Drescher who played the nanny. I thought that was just a message from our friend Fran. No, no.

Turns out she's not your friend unless you pay her. What? Hi, Jono and Ben. It's me, Fran Drescher. I hear you're having a fabulous 90s party. Am I invited? I hope you guys have the best time and just enjoy yourself. And if you need anyone to take care of the kids, do you need a nanny?

There you go. I've asked her to take care of the kids this weekend. So, I mean, you paid top dollar for a half-hearted, unenthusiastic message from a celebrity from yesteryear. I thought she was our mate. What else has she been lying to me about? I'm sorry, Ben. I'm sorry to break it to you this way. That is your spy update for the South. Or you can head to thehits.co.nz

It's all been a lie. It is the Hits. You got Jono and Ben. It's one of the biggest shows on Netflix right now. It's a documentary about a con man from Israel who pretends to be a billionaire diamond dealer's son. It's a documentary about a con man from Israel who pretends to be a billionaire, a billionaire diamond dealer's son. It's called The Tinder Swindler.

When I first talked with Simon, immediately we had a bond. I shared my whole heart with him. And then he asked me if I wanted to travel with him. I want a private jet. It felt like stepping into a movie. And then in the middle of the night,

he said there was something he wants to tell me. He said he has threats against him. He needs our cash. It's $140,000. His life depended on me. That's when police tell me the man I love was never real. Everything's a lie. Ooh, the Tinder.

So he swindled many ladies out of millions and millions of dollars on Tinder. They reckon about $10 million he swindled across Europe. I mean, alarm bells should have been ringing when he said, hi, my name's Simon, professional swindler. Well, he didn't quite hear that. What do you do for a job? I swindle. And as soon as, you know, those would be raising red flags for me well it's interesting you know because you you go into watching it i don't know if you guys have seen it but clearly a lot of people have seen

it because it's like the biggest thing on netflix you go into it going well how can you know you kind of go and go how can people get swindled for this amount but it's it doesn't happen overnight you know like he kind of he matches with these women on tinder uh he goes out and dates on them he treats them to lavish you know things he's on private jets there's champagne there's all sorts of stuff it's like a ben boy state yeah and it's over like a year they're in like a relationship together he's sending them stuff he's sending them nice messages they're telling looking for apartments it doesn't just happen straight away before the you know the asking for money and stuff comes in so he's got a long game happening here. And is he doing it to multiple women at the same time?

See, that's what you kind of find out in the end. You're like, well, how can he afford to be paying for private jets and all those things? Well, he's basically funding that from another person, and then the next person's funding someone else's experience and all that, you know, the dating and all. So it's a break. Multiple swindles, yes, Stu.

And the women probably feel obliged. Well, not obliged, but they probably feel, oh, my goodness, this man's given me so much. Like, he's taken me on private jets, luxury things. I probably should, like, they're probably like, this is me giving back to him, you know what I mean? He seems good for it, yeah, because obviously at some stage through their relationship, once he's, you know, kind of built up their trust, he's like,

there's some people out to get me. I've got to cancel my credit cards. He sends them footage of him and his bodyguard in an ambulance that they're clearly bleeding. They've been attacked. And they're like, I need help. People are coming to get me. And that's when they obviously start to help through the credit card.

But you do go, it's so wild and crazy that it's almost believable. You know? That storyline. If it was being told to you over a year long period and the trust had been gained I guess this is so why would anyone lie about this Tinder was past my dating years

you too Ben? I got my wife the old fashioned way I purchased her from the Ukraine the good old days of love affordable European wives no oh geez yeah the good old days of love affordable european wives no no no you begged while meeting her at a pub or something but it is obviously and it's one of the interesting things i found from watching that doc and i don't want to spoil everything that happens because there's a really great twist at the end but one

of the ladies who's obviously been swindled out about $250,000, they're like, are you off Tinder now? She's like, no. I'm back on it. Because it's not all like that. But you think that experience would be enough to put anyone off Tinder. It's a game of Russian roulette, isn't it really, Tinder? You're going to have some wins, you're going to have some losses. And that's what we want to do

right now. We want to play a game, 0800 the hits. You give us a call. If you're on Tinder, been on Tinder, whatever. You start telling the beginning of your Tinder story, your Tinder date. Stop there. And then we have to guess if it was a Tinder swindler or a Tinder

windler. Did you have a swindle or a windle? Did it work out well? Well, maybe they weren't quite the person they claimed to be. Maybe not to the extreme of the Netflix doco, but we'll find out next. It is that.

Every time you come around, you know I can't say no. It's Ed Sheeran, actually his 31st birthday today. So very happy birthday to Ed Sheeran, who of course loves catching up on the podcast, right? He does, and he'll appreciate that heartfelt birthday message. Only 31, man. Yeah, it feels like he's been around forever because he has been around for a long, long time.

Tinder Swindler. It's on Netflix. The biggest thing on Netflix at the moment. Long story short, this is a guy from Israel swindling many women out of millions and millions of dollars over the years. And so we want to play a game of Tinder Swindler or Tinder Windler.

Now, this is obviously Tinder. This is not how you meet your partner, the traditional New Zealand way of going to a pub, binge drinking, making some shocking life decisions and an unplanned pregnancy. We're talking about the future here. So we're going to kick it off with you, Marcus and Kati. Kati, welcome. Oh, moreno, lad. How are you?

Oh, moreno. It's great to have you on, Marcus. Okay, you start your Tinder date and then stop, and then Ben and myself have to figure out if it was a Tinder swindler or a Tinder windler. Okay, it was 2014. My fat mate chucked me on Tinder, and I met a woman on Tinder from Whanganui, and I was in Masterton at the time.

Oh, okay. Stop there, Ben. Your hometown of Masterton. Yeah, well, everywhere's an, and I was in Masterton at the time. Oh, okay. Stop there, Ben. You're hometown of Masterton. Yeah, well, everywhere's an upgrade if you're from Masterton. So I'm going to go this turned out great. I am an inter-regional relationship blossomed. I'm going to say you're now married, two kids. It's been going on for 14, 15 years.

Oh, not quite 14, 15 years, but you nailed the two kids. Oh! Jono. Jono Pryor. It's a Tinder windler. Oh, that's a great story from Tinder. Yeah, that's awesome. No, it's been really good.

So, yeah, we've got a five-year-old who started school last week and a two-year-old. So, yeah, our five-year-old, he's a bit like Jono and Ben, by the way. He's been in trouble at school already. Already losing his hair, is he? Yeah, that too. Bad tattoos. Oh, that's awesome.

I'm so pleased to hear it worked out for you. We're going to flick you out some help eats so you hold the line, all right? Awesome. Cheers, fellas. Thanks, Marcus. Really appreciate your call. Some good stories come out of the Tinder Kick it off with a Tinder windler, Jordan you're on from

Wellington, the start of your Tinder date Alright, he flew in, booked a fancy Wellington hotel, took me across the road tried to buy me diamonds Stop there, he's gone diamonds for his dinner, he flew in as well. I'm going to say it's a Tinder

windler, and it was almost the storyline of Pretty Woman, except you weren't a sex worker. It sounds amazing. Was it as good as it seemed? No, definitely not. Oh! It was a Tinder swindler. Tinder swindler, yep.

He disappeared a month or so after I just didn't hear from him and then found out that he was an international con man. There was a warrant out for his arrest. No way! He ripped off multi-million dollar jobs and, yeah, been on the run in New Zealand. So it wasn't the same person as the Netflix doco? No, luckily. But it sounds like a very similar story.

So on your first date with him, he's taken you to buy a diamond ring. Well, not necessarily a ring, but he took me to a fancy jewelry store and just said, pick whatever you want. I didn't because I felt really uncomfortable. In hindsight now, you're like, oh, jeez. I should have gone, yeah, Michael Hill Jewelry, but he diamond-encrusted something. But then, you know, watching that Tinder swindler,

that was someone else's poor dollars that would have been paying for it, so it's probably good that you didn't. Yeah, I got an image sent to me from one of his friends that he'd ripped off a hotel down in Dunedin and he was wanted all over the place. So what had he been doing? What had he been doing? Yeah, had he been ripping people off online or in real life? I think in real life. People were after him from the UK and Sweden.

Oh, my goodness. And you don't know how it all ended up? No, because he just disappeared. I don't even know if his name was his real name. Oh, my God. I'm glad you got out of there. What was dinner like? Dinner was delicious.

$300 plus of champagne and oysters. Wow. Oh, jeez. It sounds like a dream. Except for the whole wanted internationally part. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, thank you so much, Jordan, for sharing that with us. It's an incredible, incredible story. No, no problem. Give us 20 minutes.

We'll give you a chance to win $5,000. Yes, and next I have some serious medical news that I need to share. I'll update you this is going to be a long play to it anyway, just play something now for my serious medical news Ben Boyce, I know you've been waiting I didn't know anything about this until you said

five minutes ago so I have a slipped disc in my back and a damaged sciatic nerve. Right. So that's this. Well, how did this happen? Unless you'd be hobbling around, but then that's probably every second,

to be honest, every second. Yeah, I'd hobble around every time. Sometimes, like, maybe it's an attention thing. I don't know. It's always easy hobbling. Oh, I've rolled an ankle. I've rolled a thing. You love the attention on yourself.

What? I hobble around like the hunchback of Notre Dame for attention? You've always got like a rolled ankle or something. I know, and this is my point. This is what I wanted to get to. It's like this week, the combination of me just frothing over the halftime performance of the Super Bowl. Yeah. You know, a damaged slip disc in my back.

Hobbling around like you say, wanting attention all the time. This is a week out of my whole life. This is a week where I'm like, I'm getting old. Like I got up out of the couch yesterday and went, ugh. I groaned.

I did the groan. And I'm like, what is going on? You're right about the halftime show as well. There was a great social media post of someone saying, it's so great they didn't do a halftime show for old people.

And then you realise, oh, actually, they probably did it away. And there was another observation of like, if you're enjoying this halftime performance, you need to book

a new colonoscopy. And I'm like, you're right, I probably... It's been that long. It is sad though, isn't it? I feel like I've got the body of Joe Biden. I sleep and I get injured.

I'm just sleeping. That's one thing, eh? When someone's like, what are you doing to your neck? You're like, I don't know. I just lay down, shut my eyes. I was sleeping. I hurt my back. This is all coming for you, Julia. I was sleeping I hurt my back this is all coming for you Julia

I know I know I'm actually I'm nearly 24 and I'm starting to feel in some ways oh I just like nearly rolled my ankle

and I would never usually do that I'm getting old well it's funny I feel like this is my body going hey you were laughing

at 22 who's laughing now buddy it's like my body's a temple but more like a broken ruin in Rome so your back's

going to be alright though you know yeah probably I mean I really oversold the fact that it was a serious medical event didn't you

kept people around though and that's the main thing that's what we want coming up we have Ben's diagnosis from his test yesterday will he still be with us by the end of the week

I hope so but you'll find out next. And $5,000 actually up for grabs on the Hits. The Hits, Jono and Ben. Here on the Hits, Jono and Ben, 7.30, Thursday morning. Scrolling through your feed. All right, time now for the world's least violent man to present some hard-hitting news.

A record number of 11,000000 sorry, 1,160, not 11,000, but I'm sure that'll get that way. COVID in the community yesterday it was announced and also outside Parliament day 10 of people outside protesting the anti-mandate. There was a lot of talk

yesterday that police were like, we're going to tow some cars because the cars are all kind of jammed in around the streets, kind of like that scene from The Castle where they're like, I need to get the Tirana to get the keys to the Commodore and you need to move all that. I mean, when it all does wind down, it's going to be a nightmare to get out of there. Absolutely.

People would have lost their keys. Car batteries will be flat. It'll be like when you leave a concert. That's why I always like to leave a concert, speaking of being an old man before. I like to leave a concert just as the encore's coming on. You missed the best song. But the police have claimed that progress has been made on the car situation, despite the fact that they've towed no cars.

But 12 cars have been moved on by the protesters, so that's good of them. But haven't more come in, though? More have come in and more have gone. Is that right? Yeah. They're making progress, though. The police are making progress more have gone. Is that right? Yeah. They're making progress though. They're making progress. And you know, you joke about this towing situation.

You know, we're sitting here in this air-conditioned studio with all these cars blocking the road. But it would be a nightmare if you had a business around there. Imagine it. No one can get to your business. And everyone in Wellington would be doing a wide berth on the protest, I imagine, and staying away from the area.

Try and get it. Yesterday, David Seymour was the first politician to sort of talk to the protesters, and then he sort of got reprimanded by the Prime Minister. Said he was irresponsible. Someone else called him a slimy politician. Oh, really? Did they? Did they really?

It's the act of a slimy politician We should call David Seymour after 8 o'clock And see what he has to say about that Hello slimy politician What are you going to say to yourself But it doesn't look like it's going to end And you know the good thing There's a positive out of this for us

Personally I mean we came up with a wonderful photo meme Yesterday that Juliet You put together on Photoshop Adobe I think you were using And we sort of turned it into a dock Department of Conservation recreational campground I told me yesterday that Juliet, you put together on Photoshop, Adobe, I think you were using. Correct. And we sort of turned it into a doc, Department of Conservation Recreational Campground. Put that on Facebook. And the bloody protesters, jeez, they're thriving on social.

How many likes did we get? Over 5,000. It's gone down. I say we've become the only pro-protester show on the market. I just put it out there. We didn't say one way or the other. You just put it out there. But they were sharing it and stuff. I was like, this is how you get results on the internet, with the market. We just put it out there. We didn't say one way or the other. You just put it out there. But they were sharing it and stuff. I was like, this is how you get results on the internet,

with the protesters. And a feel-good story out of a horrible story from the USA. A girl who went missing more than two years ago at the age of four was found alive and well yesterday in New York. Under the stairs, they got a tip-off of a place that she was at, and, well, potentially at. They went around and they saw this little flashlight under the stairs and a blanket over the staircase, opened up the staircase,

and she was found alive and well two years after being taken from the girl. Like Harry Potter under the stairs. Had she been kidnapped, obviously? Well, yeah. I think there was some sort of debate over who was the real parents. These people thought for some reason they were the real parents, I think, reading into it. But she's now gone back to her actual parents.

Oh my goodness. And she's alive and well after two years. That is terrifying. I know, a terrifying ordeal. Has she been living under the stairs

the whole time? I don't know if she had been living under the stairs according to this article whether they just put her there when they found out someone was knocking at the door.

But yeah. Oh my gosh. What a happy outcome. Yeah, from a pretty horrible, you would have thought it was a pretty horrible story. We've got $ Well, happy outcome. Yeah, from a pretty, pretty horrible, what you would have thought was a pretty horrible story. We've got $5,000 up for grabs very, very shortly. Five words, 5K it is, that's.

Five words for 5K. You're just five words away from $5,000. Really love playing this game each morning on the hits. Five words, $5,000. A simple game of a word association, but it's great when we connect five words and we give you $5,000. Yes, brought to you in association with Ben, in association with Jono, and in association with Maya this morning in Christchurch.

How are you? Hello, how are you? I'm doing well, Maya. You work as a supermarket packer. Yes, I do. It's very exciting, keeps me busy. Now, do you pack An overnight packer Yes

Yes We were talking Who were we talking to Oh the guy from the warehouse Went to the warehouse And he's like By the end of the day Sort of midnight

Every shelf is almost empty And they have to restock it overnight Crazy huh Yeah Who knew And you're that little elf Who magically restocks the shelf, Maya. Yes, I am.

You want to win $5,000? I would love that, please. We'll try our very best for you. Who do you want to send into the soundproof booth? Jono, if I can. Yeah, of course you can send Jono. It's great for us to have a break from him. You can stock me in the shelf.

Yeah. He is making his way to the corner. All right, Maya, you obviously know how the game works? Yes, yes. Here we go. Here is your first word this morning. It is backstreet. Backstreet. Backstreet boys? Yeah, backstreet's back, alright.

Are they back? Maybe they're coming back. As long as there's music, we'll be coming back again. There's still music. There is still music. There is still music. Yeah, as far as I know. Flip is your second word.

F-L-I-P. Flip. Flip. Like a, maybe like flip something. You like flip flop or let's go with flop. Flip flop. I was thinking something that had two words at the end of it, but I don't think that would really help,

and that's a rude gesture that you can do towards people. Ah, yes. But I don't think that gets it very confusing. Flip flop was quite good. Queen was word number three. Queen, king. King. Burger.

You could also go with that same last word, but what are you going to go with? also go with that same last word but what are you gonna go with burger uh oh that's a hard one um i'm thinking like fuel or do i go king again i don't know i don't think we've ever had a double word in the thing i'm sure that's allowed yeah i wonder if jono is like hungry and thinking about food. He doesn't eat during the day. He strangely doesn't eat. He kind of fasts during the day. Oh, God. His body's thinking about food,

but he's trying to tell his body not to. Can I come back to that one story? Yeah, no worries. And the last word is dance. Dance. Dance. Oh, dance. That's a hard one.

Dance floor. Dance floor is a good option. And we'll circle back now to Burger. Any thoughts? Probably not because we're talking about dancing. But what are you going to lock in? Let's go king. We'll do a double word. All right.

I like it. We'll bring Jono out of the soundproof booth and we'll see now if he thinks the same way as you. Boo, it's me. How'd you go, Maya? I hope I went alright, yeah. Okay, we'll try and you stack shells. We'll try and win you stack loads of cash, okay? Alright, let's do that.

What would you do with the 5k out of interest? I would love to hear some with one of my friends who's going through a little bit of a hard time. I'd like to do a little bit of shopping for myself and I'd love to hear some with one of my friends who's going through a little bit of a hard time. I'd like to do a little bit of shopping for myself and I'd love to put some aside to be able to go to Australia when we can. Oh, God.

Why did I ask you that? Why did I ask you that question? You think about that right now when you think about these five words that are going to come out of your mouth. All right. First word we sent to Maya this morning, it was backstreet.

Boys. Yeah, well done. Uh right. First word we sent to Maya this morning, it was backstreet. Boys. Yeah, well done. Uh-oh. Book that flight to Australia and tell your friend everything's okay. Flip was the next word. Flip. Flip flop.

Ooh, well done. Well done. Queen was word number three. Queen. Queen or king. Oh, Maya. Here we go, Joy. Oh, Maya. Here we go, Jolly. Ring, ring, hello, is that the travel agent?

Yeah, a business class flight for Maya. Oh, business class. Yeah, I booked her a business. Wow. Burger was the next word. Burger. Burger patty. Oh!

What was the word you just said before? What did you say? Burger king. Oh! What was the word you just said before? What did you say to Queen? Burger king. Oh! That was a double king word this morning. Maya. Oh, damn it. That's okay.

That's a call to your friend and say everything's not going to be okay. Oh, jeez. And the last word this morning was dance. Dance party. Unfortunately, Maya, it didn't quite work out today, but it was lots of fun. Hopefully we get to do it again. Thank you so much. That was awesome. You're a champion, Maya. Keep well. Have a great day, eh? You too. Bye-bye.

Alright, Chewie, we're going to get Spy on next, aren't we? Here we are. Mark Wilberg kind of messed up Valentine's Day, and I'll give you the details next. That is the hits you got got Jono and Ben. Let's get some hardcore gossip in here, shall we? None of this softcore stuff, Juliet. What have we got?

Well, if you want some hardcore gossip, a little update. Kanye has apologised for posting Kim's messages privately. He's deleted pretty much all of his posts from Instagram, and maybe he's running it in. You've been deeply invested in this whole storyline with Kanye just going all in on Instagram. I never used to follow Kanye. It wasn't like a huge – I've never been more interested in him than right now. But anyway, so that's that update.

He's been on a rampage. She's moved on with comedian Pete Davidson. Kanye's not happy about it. He's like, you'll never meet my kids. And he's writing in caps lock as well. Yes, and then he posted basically saying I'm sorry. He said I learnt that caps lock makes people

think I'm yelling at them, so he stopped. But then he brought back the caps lock in the next post. So it's a bit of a rollercoaster. Now I'm yelling. I get his thing though, because once you start typing and then you realise you're in caps lock, you're too far gone to go back. You know, there needs to be a function where you hit a button and it fixes all your caps lock worries.

I know what you mean. That should be an invention. There probably is, to be honest. From a caps lock guy. Yeah, you love a caps lock, don't you? Yeah. And Mark Wahlberg has explained how he got into trouble on Valentine's Day with his wife. And I feel like this is something we've all talked about before.

Of course we're supposed to celebrate. I always send, I'll send flowers from each child leading up to Valentine's Day. Each child? All four kids and then a big bouquet for myself. Wow. This year she was like, you know what? Let's not do anything. Let's not get anything for each other for Valentine's Day.

So I actually believed her for the first time. When I got into my bathroom in the morning, I had a card, three gifts, rose petals. I'm like, holy sh... But she's the one who said nothing, right? She said nothing. Did she forget that? And then I made a reservation for dinner. And then she was like, no, let's just go another time.

And then, of course, I got in trouble for saying okay to that too. That's been your falling into the trap at Christmastime with that, haven't you? Yeah. But I pulled one back this year. What'd you do? The same thing. And I was like, I had the present there just in case. And then I was like, oh, this is a good one.

So you had the same arrangement heading into this Christmas. Yes. And you weren't going to buy each other presents, but you had a sneaky backup. I'm not going to have that again when my wife gives me something in my office. That is smart. But you said no. Because then if she doesn't give you a present, you can then save it for the next event. Save it for the birthday or something.

It's a panic present. It's probably a really good rule of thumb to have a panic present ready for any occasion. But not just for your partner. Just, you know, if friends come over, they give you a present. It's always, bro, it's probably a really good rule of thumb to have a panic present ready for any occasion. But not just for your partner, just, you know, if friends come over, they give you a present, you're like, oh, let me pull this out. And then it turns out to be like a sexy negligee or something. Why are you giving me a thong? I'm your mum.

True. Thanks anyway. Happy birthday, mum. So it turns out Mark Wahlberg is like all of us. And that is your Spy Update for this hour. For more, you can head to thehits.co.nz. Breakfast with Jono and Ben. T-Swift, love story. It is the Hits.

You've got Jono and Ben, 8.04. And now the protest going on outside Parliament, Day 10 of Rhythm in Parliament, as someone called it. R&P. Yeah, good stuff. And Producer Behub's just saying that to the Police Association president. He says it's a dog's breakfast. He reckons it's going to go on three months.

It wouldn't surprise him. Three months? Wow, three months. That is moving in. When do they start owning the land? Yeah, geez. Trevor Mallard, who's the Speaker of the House in Parliament, much publicised over the

weekend, started playing music over the loudspeakers to hopefully get people to get sick of certain songs and they would leave. He played songs like Barry Manilow. He certainly took the granddad approach to getting rid of the young pesky protesters,

didn't he? Baby Shark came out, I think, on Sunday afternoon. There's Macarena, all sorts. It's almost the perfect playlist for every drunk auntie at a wedding. You know, Manilow to Macarena to Baby Shark. They've got it all. Absolute party starter.

And we wanted to call the parliamentary request line in Wellington to see if we could make a request for DJ Mallard but some DJs don't take requests do they and they go oh yeah

we'll put your song on yeah you know when you go up to a bar you're like why don't you play Eiffel 65 on blue they're like

yeah man we'll get that on soon then you come back after now you still haven't played Eiffel 65 on blue da ba dee do ba da

they're like don't worry mate it'll be on soon then you end up hanging out there until 3 o'clock and you don't hear I'm blue. The song that you wanted to hear. So we couldn't call Trevor Mallard yesterday, but we do have David Seymour's number from the ACT party. Yeah, David always answers our calls. I don't know if it's out of desperation or he's got nothing else to do.

So we phoned David to see if he could put a request in for us. Hello, David Seymour. Can we please be put through to the request line for the protesters? Do we put our request through Trevor, do we? Yeah, yeah, he's the DJ, but he's a bit contemptuous of

everybody else. Who is this, by the way? It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hats. Oh, you legends. How are you guys? We're doing all right. We just thought maybe we could put up our radio show over there. You know, we need some more audience, you know? Well, I reckon, you know, you guys are always looking for an opportunity to grow, and I think

if you were to be broadcast on the steps of Parliament, probably double your audience. Can I just say, David Seymour, I love how agreeable you are. Like, five minutes into the call you go, who is this, by the way? Yeah, well, I'm just everyone's friend, you know? How often is your phone ringing? It's the Trevor Mallard.

Yeah, is your phone ringing all the time? Absolutely, and every time I think, man, I hope this is John Owen Benton. And sometimes it is, but not often enough. Well, we have some other requests that maybe, I mean, you can maybe get a line through to Mallard. We can't get a hold of him. But also, we thought this might be appropriate for the protesters. If it weren't for your gumboots, where would you be?

Red Dag, weren't for your gumboots? Yeah, I haven't sung that since primary school. And then another one from The Clash, a classic. Should I stay or should I go? Yeah, yeah. Look, I would say the other one could be Don't You Forget About Me. Oh, yeah. Because I reckon what these guys really want,

apart from the policy changes, they want people to be listening to them. And, you know, I think the time's come for a bit of hope and healing to glue our country back together. Holy smokes. David Seymour straight from the politician playbook there, segues off a song gag and then into some messaging.

What do you think is going to happen? Like, it's a bit of a stalemate at the moment. What is going to happen then? Look, if you take it seriously for a moment, I mean, what it requires is a mature de-escalation. So there's some things that happened in the protest that are unacceptable to the rest of New Zealand. But equally, you know, these people are human, they're part of New Zealand, and ultimately we've got to glue our country back together. That's why,

you know, it's time for the Speaker to stop turning on sprinklers and playing music and calling people feral and actually work out how we get there. Well, you're right. People just want to be heard, don't they? Exactly. It's about listening. So look, that's the hopeful path, is a mature de-escalation, the way Trevor Mallard's behaving. Jeez, you start to understand why democracy is in trouble around the world.

John, I was saying it's kind of from the Boomer playbook, isn't it? He's turning on the hose or the sprinkler, playing some Barry Manilow. I actually think he thinks he's Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone. Remember that movie where the burglars come and he says, booby traps, here's a plan.

I can't wait until he ties an iron to a piece of rope. Oh, that was brutal, wasn't it? I've still got that image seared on my young eyes. Hey, David Seymour, thank you for your time. Appreciate you. Thanks, legends. Vodax. Vodax.

He's never off, is he? Oh, jeez. Okay, so these are some of the songs that we've been talking about before that have played over Parliament. They haven't quite worked, have they? What would be the one song that would get you to leave? Ben Boyce is there, sitting there.

He hasn't showered in 10 days. Covered in hemp clothing. I don't know. The song that kind of gets on, it's a great song, but it gets on my nerves every time I hear it is this one from Avicii. Because it was my wife's alarm

and she for ages waked me up, which is great. I was like, oh, that's genius. But like a year later of hearing Wake Me Up, I'm like,

oh, you know when you hear your alarm, you're like, that just, you know? So that's the song for me. I've had enough of Avicii. He won't wake me up ever again. I'm going to go, and it's a relatively new one, but boy, oh boy, it has been played at an intense level in my household.

There's a new Disney movie, Encanto, and there's a song on there, We Don't Talk About Bruno. And the irony is not lost when they're singing a song about Bruno, but here we are. We don't song about Bruno, but here we are. I haven't seen the movie, but I go around singing that song because the kids sing that song. I think it's number one on iTunes at the moment. It's just on repeat, and it's some sick, tormented,

demented torture that Disney do. It's like when you see a wart on someone's hand. You just can't not be fixated on it. And so once the song's in your head, it's stuck in your head. Yeah, well, those are the songs for us. What would be the song for you, a song that you just can't listen to anymore,

would drive you to leave? 0800 the hits or 4487 on the text. Let's get those calls on next. It's the Biebs, anyone? You're on the hits. John Owen Baird, 8.14. Of course, day 10 of the protests outside Parliament, the anti-mandate protests.

And Trevor Mallard tried playing some music over the loudspeakers to see if he could end the protest. Yeah, a bit of a tactic there. But if anything, it got the protest going. I was just waiting for the Grease Megamix to come out, the YMCA. Would have been like a school disco in the 90s. James Blunt, who's very, very funny. He's got the song Beautiful, of course.

He offered his services over social media, didn't he? Yeah, on the weekend, didn't he? He's like, hey, if Manolo doesn't work, I'm always here. Very generous offering. He's selfless. We actually talked to him about, you were like, what's the appropriate level for someone to listen to his song out in public?

And this is what he had to say. As far as I understood it, when I sell people my music, we have an understanding that you must keep it very, very quiet amongst yourselves and not admit that you listen to my music. And so it should be with headphones and very much in the privacy of your own home at a reasonable volume.

James Blunt, we've actually gone to the trouble of getting a giant Bluetooth speaker here. And so what we want to do is we want to start playing your music. Can you tell us when is an inappropriate James Blunt level? Stop. He's a very good actor. He's a very funny man. But I got to the end of the interview and I was like, stop bagging yourself.

You were actually really good. You were very successful. Yeah, I felt sorry for him. So it ended like an intervention, but 0800 the hits. Songs that you can't hear anymore. What would be the one song, if you're a protester, that would move you away from the parliamentary grounds? Maybe it was a song you got married to.

Maybe a song you got divorced to. Maybe a song that you had indigestion to. I don't know. We'll kick it off with you, Sarah. What is it? In Auckland. Morning, team. Morning.

What are you locking in? Baby Shark. Oh, Baby Shark. Awful song. But it's catchy. It is. It's got its place. It is.

You know, but you're right. It probably was never destined for, like, mass appeal. It was never going to win a Grammy. Yeah. But for kids, they love it. Yeah, for songwriting. And it's stuck. There's another one.

What was the one you were just talking about before? It's Raining Tacos. Oh, it's Raining Tacos. Yeah, that's a disturbing song. And there's one about a duck who went up to a lemonade stand. I love that song. Oh, that one you love. A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man,

run to the stand. Hey! Bum, bum, bum. Got any grapes? Yeah, that's right. Shut up. to a lemonade stand and he said to me running in the sand hey bomb bomb bomb got any grapes yeah that's right shut up Darren you're on from Hamilton

the song you can't hear anymore hey mate how's it going what is it for you it's gotta be crazy frog mate like that thing

is the stuff that nightmares is made of and recently it was discovered that crazy frog was not wearing any pants

the whole time and none of us noticed he had it hanging out the whole time that nightmares is made of. And recently it was discovered that Crazy Frog was not wearing any pants. The whole time, and none of us noticed. We're just like, this guy's crazy. He had it hanging out the whole time. I thought it was an umbilical cord. It's not. Crazy Frog was, he was crazy. He was crazy, and probably should have been done for a decent exposure.

So you'd like to dig that song out of your head with a spoon, Darren? Oh, absolutely. If there's one thing I could never hear again in my life, that would be it. Oh, true. He could try that, DJ Mallard. Steve, from the Waikato song you can't hear again. Yeah, how are you? Good on you. How are you? Keep up the program, mate. Keep up the good work. Oh, thank you, Steve.

What's your song, matey? Mate, 24 hours of constant Christmas songs from Michael Buberle should put an end to the whole damn thing. Well, yeah, I can tell you firsthand about that. Yep, yep, yep. That's sort of what gave me the idea, because you dipped your head in last time.

That's right. Just before Christmas, we made Ben listen to Bublé for over 24 hours in total. For no reason, because you had him organised. Yeah. Is he off his medication yet? Yeah, well, I'm just coming back to this. He's trying to brought back memories.

Hey, good on you, Steve. Keep well, eh? See you, mate. You have an awesome day. You too, mate. Appreciate your time. There we go. Some great songs that Mello could use today

at the protest. Day 10. We're doing 28 good deeds in 28 days. Next, we need to make a bit of a special call for a good deed for today's good deed. It is the hits. John Owen Bairn, 28 good deeds in 28 days. Next, we need to make a bit of a special call for a good deed for today's good deed. It is the hits. Jono and Ben, 28 good deeds in 28 days through the month of February. That was the wee goal that we set ourselves.

It's been a really fun journey, helping out some people along the way. Oh, it is. You know, some days in this job, you go, there's a platform to do some good. 99% of the time, we use it for pure evil purposes. But every now and then, we do some good. Ben, this week so far we've washed Portaloos. Yesterday we surprised some young students with

international superstar Benny on Zoom. We washed ourselves before we met Benny by the way and our hands, everything, every part of our bodies were washed, so if you'd like us to do you a good deed 4487, I know there's a nomination to go and wash a fire truck this weekend Ben Oh really? Not a washing, eh?

Not a washing. Well, no one likes washing anything. Yeah, you're right. Washing or folding. Maybe it should have just been Jono and Ben wash 28 different things. 28 days. Do you want something washed? We offered to wash Benny, but she's like, no, that's strange.

I've had a shower today. That's fine. So, joining us on the phone this morning is Linnaeus. Hello. How are you? Good. How are you going? Yeah, I'm good. I'm good, thanks.

Now, we're doing 28 good deeds in 28 days, and you've actually sent a message through of a good deed that we could potentially do. I have, yeah. So my friend Paul. So what's going on with Paul? So Paul has recently lost his wife under very sad circumstances, and he's got a young son, just turned five. Yeah, so I just wanted to help him out, obviously,

because it's only been very recently. Well, I'm very sorry to hear that. In your message you wrote time is very poor at the moment for Paul. He's obviously having to drop the little one to school, having to do all the dinners, all the lunches and everything and work, no doubt.

And you suggested some meals. So we've managed, thanks to our good friends at My Food Bag, to get a month's worth of free food and free meals for the family. That's amazing. Thank you so much, guys. Honestly, I don't even know what to say.

Thank you very, very much. You sound like a wonderful friend who's there through a very difficult stage. I try to be. Two weeks of made meals. So there's going to be ready-made meals. Just biff them in the oven. They're good to be. Two weeks of made meals. So there's going to be ready-made meals. Just biff them in the oven. They're good to go. And then two weeks of the fresh box as well.

That's so cool. Thank you, guys. That's awesome. Well, we may as well call Paul and tell him the good news. Do you think we hear Paul will be up for a call? Yeah, absolutely. All right. You stay on the line there, Linnaeus.

Hello. Oh, hi, Paul. It's John O'Bain calling from the Hits radio station. Hey,

how are you? Hey, not too bad, mate. Hey, just ringing to say your friend Linnae is,

we're doing 28 good deeds in 28 days and she has nominated you and we'd like to hook you up. Thanks to our friends at My Food Bag with a month's worth of free food. That's awesome.

Yeah. That's my day. Oh, you're very welcome. She nominated you. She said, obviously, you've been going through a bit of a tough time at the moment. We're so sorry to hear about that.

Yeah, I have to, mate. Yeah. Yeah, and we wish you all the best, mate. And we just wanted to give you that on behalf of My Food Bag. Oh, that's great. Thank you very much, mate, yeah. Yeah, and we wish you all the best, mate, and we just wanted to give you that on behalf of my food bag. Oh, that's great. Thank you very much, guys. No worries.

You and your sons at Payton? Yes, it is. Yeah, Payton, you've got dinner sorted for the next four weeks. Awesome. That's awesome, guys. Thank you. Hey, no worries. You keep your head up, mate, and thinking of you.

Okay, cheers, mate. Here we go. And if you'd like us to do you a good deed, you can just text 4487, and we will wash anything you want us to. It's cold hard. It is the hits. You got it, John. I'm Ben.

Just as that song was ending, Ben was like, it's Ben's turn to do a little chat bit now. And he's like, oh, we'll see how this chat bit goes. And he's like, I don't have much confidence in it. And then he sort of mumbled some words, didn't he, Juliet? So let's see if he can pull it back. Here we go. I'll try my best.

Because obviously he's talking about something. I feel a little bit bad about this, to be honest. My dog, Beau. We talk a lot about my dog, Beau. Love Beau. And yeah, he's a big, white, fluffy dog. Very big dog. Like he's a big dog, right?

He's too much dog for you. Yeah. Would you agree, Juliet? Yeah. Yeah, I can imagine you actually, if I didn't know you had a dog, I'd probably imagine you with like a small little yappy thing.

Yeah. That's like me, small and yappy as a person. But I've got a big dog. And one of the things... He's not insecure about anything, by the way. He's not making up for anything with his big dog. Bo loves to stretch out. He loves to stretch right out on the floor.

He always has since we've had him. He loves to stretch out. He's very unusual with his sleeping habits. It's like a brontosaurus lying on the ground with all its legs out. And even in the middle of the night, he wants to go outside because he's got a lot of fur. He gets quite hot, night, he wants to go outside because he's got a lot of fur. He gets quite hot, so he always wants to go outside, wakes me up with a little bark like this.

Hey, mate. Hey, mate. Hey, wake up. So I put him outside, and he loves stretching out outside. But that is very caring of him, too, because he knows if he goes full noise talking. Yeah. Ruff, ruff, ruff.

Too much. What's going on? He's like going a quarter bark, just like, oh. Yeah, so he likes ruff, ruff. Too much. What's going on? He's like going a quarter bark. Just like, oh. Yeah. So he likes to go outside and sleep and stretch out. But the other thing is we bought him a kennel when he was little. We thought maybe he could sleep inside the kennel.

Tried to get him inside there. He'd go inside, have a look around. And then you'd find him outside just sleeping next to the kennel in the rain. You'd be like, mate, go in the kennel. Try and get him a kennel. No, he wouldn't use it. So he wouldn't use it. So that's the back story of why we haven't bought the dog a dog bed the kids are

like should we get him a bed we're like no he didn't use the kennel is the kennel like a total span garage yeah because that's what you would need i keep the lawnmower in there i keep all sorts of tools in there i sleep in there when things aren't going well literally in the dog box but yeah so we're like we don't need a dog bed because he loves stretching out didn't use the kennel you know this is going to be a waste of money

and then two weeks ago my mum came to stay and she's like hey I got given a dog bed that's too big for my dog she's got a small yappy thing Julia yeah

would you like it for Barry I'm like oh yeah you can but he's never going to use it well he has used it every day like he's got a dog bed has it Well, he has used it every day. Really? He's got a dog bed.

Has it got like a post-traumatic support? It's like a Californian king, mate. Yeah. Basically, his fur is just one giant mattress wrapped around a body. Does he need extra? No, that's what I was thinking. We won't use it. I was like, watch this. He won't use it.

He's got to the stage that, you know, you guys have come around to our house, and he gets so excited when people come around. Now he'll just lie on the bed, put his head up and go, and just back down again. This is the laziest welcome ever because he loves his bed. He's like one of those people you'd see on a documentary that stayed in their bed for years. And they have to crane them out of the house.

Like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory's grandparents. Yeah, like one of those. He's just living in the bed. I'm like, oh, I feel bad all this time. I could have got you a bed. And I said, no. And now you have in the bed. I'm like, oh, I feel bad all this time. I could have got you a bed. And I said no, and now you have, you know. But he's loving it. He's loving it.

It's like too much so. He doesn't get up at all. He's like a stoned teenager who's given up on school, and the parents are like, oh, well, we've lost him. I've got a window in here. Get some blinds going, but he just stays in bed all day. So that's the dog now. Love it.

I mean, he still gets up and around about. You found a way to chill him out. Yeah. It was a bed. I could have got the whole time. So coming up before 9 o'clock on the show, Laura Daniel, Seven Days is back on the TV. New time.

It is a brand new time. And Laura's going to share a story how she was almost kidnapped and scammed simultaneously. Alright, it's on the way for you. It is the hits. The hits. It's seven days back on the TV tonight at a new time on TV3, 7.30 and on the show tonight, she used to work with

us on Jono and Ben. Comedian Laura Daniel, how are you? I'm good. How you doing? Yeah, doing really well, mate. It's lovely to have you on. Laura refers to Ben and me as her comedy dads, and we're shocking fathers. Yeah. Yeah. That is true.

That is true. We haven't called in on our daughter for a very long time. Who knows what she's been doing. Everything going all right? You're all good? Yeah, it's all good. It's all good. It's nice for you guys to kick it.

It's not like it's been a whole pandemic or anything. Now, seven days back on the TV tonight at an earlier time, but longer as well. Yes. You guys remember what that's like. The week-to-week stress of doing that. Yeah. Yeah, no, it's been moved to 7.30, a whole hour longer. You know, there's new games.

There's rotating team captains now. There's a new font. They've got a new design. Oh, yeah, nice. Coming at us with a new font. What have you got, a Tahoma times New Roman? What are we rocking now? Yeah, I can't even really describe the font to you.

I think it's been designed specifically for the show. That's pretty fancy. The spoke? Oh, tune in tonight to see a new font. I love it. Actually, on Seven Days, there's a great game that they played in the past called My Kid Can Draw That.

But we wanted to do it on radio form because obviously we can't do something visually. My Kid Can Explain That. I got my daughters to watch a news clip, Laura Daniel, and I wanted you to see by them describing what it is, if you could guess what they were watching, all right? There's a man who's bald like Drano.

He's happy and he's talking on the news. Oh, is that a bad word? That's an F word. And again. Laura Daniel. Oh, someone, yeah, someone dropped an F bomb. Yeah. On TV.

Was it on the project the other night? It was, it was. Someone dropped an F-bomb on TV. Was it on the project the other night? It was, it was. It was Zoe Zanowski-Sinnett's dad. He did it not once but twice but three times. Have a listen. The only thing I looked for was Illume's reaction. Her younger sister.

She was f***ing crazy. She just went off the roof. I love it. That's a guy who's giving every ounce of energy he has into talking. There's nothing more he could give right now. Hey, so Laura, we were talking yesterday. I remember a story. You and your wonderful fiancé, Joseph Moore, you were travelling somewhere. And did you nearly get kidnapped or something?

Oh yeah no we got scammed That's right Yes we were doing one of our comedy shows overseas we were on our way to Edinburgh we had to buy a television for it like you know 60 inch kind of like it's like a pop concert so we have screens

in the background and we were going to we stopped on Birmingham on the way through to buy these TVs because Joseph found, like, a good deal. And we showed up, the shop wasn't open. And then these two guys come out, and they were like, oh, you guys looking to buy some TVs? They pulled up in a white van. And that should have been the first alarm bell. Yeah, like, oh, this is good. No, we were like, yeah, yeah, we're looking for some TVs.

And they're like, oh, do you reckon you can pay in cash? And we're like, sure can. How about, Laura, you wait here with this guy by yourself down the alleyway. Justin's going to go off with the other guy and get some cash out of him. Then he comes back, pays in the cash. We pop them in the car. We drive eight more hours to Edinburgh. And then we get there.

And I'm unpacking in one room. then I just hear Josh just go, well you know, the F-bomb in the background. And I walk out, I was like, what? And we found out the TVs were completely fake. The screens were just like a sheet, they were like remotes with cardboard wraps and duct tape. But they showed us and they looked legit weirdly through like the wrapping and stuff. Completely fake TVs.

And then we looked it up afterwards. Apparently Birmingham, crime capital of the UK. There you go. White van scam. The funny thing is you just need to say that story out loud and know that it was stupid.

As soon as you're left with the guy with the white van. You're like, uh? Laura, I always love catching up with you. Tonight's Seven Days makes a triumphant return with an all-new font. Hey. It's coming, and you can catch it tonight on three. Have a great day, Laura.