Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Ben Gets Involved In A Hens Do...

Episode Date: October 6, 2024

ON THE SHOW TODAY: Megans disastrous weekend... Someone went to hospital How to wake up a teenager! Get a radio show to call them!!! A very one sided Dear Megan Ben asks David Walliams about his chest hair... There is no way you've never done that! Journalists are bombing this pronunciation... Are we the first show to play a Christmas song! Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono and Ben Instagram: THEHITSBREAKFASTSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits with the Jono and Ben podcast. Cheers to Dilma, making the world a better tea. Welcome to the podcast for a Monday. It's a really fun show today. We've become the first show, we thought we became the first show in the world to do something today, right? To play a Christmas song. As voted by you, we put it to the test. It was quite mixed whether we should play a Christmas song. You won't hear the whole song on the podcast, but you'll hear some of it. Yeah.

We thought we were the first, but then someone just texted her before. In the Philippines, September the 1st. They all collectively decide that that's the date. Yeah, that sounds like something you'd do. I don't think that's too early. Yeah. So we definitely weren't the first show in the world. Probably the first in New Zealand.

That's right. So we did that this morning. We woke up my daughter, my teenage daughter, with an early morning phone call that I'll be hearing about later when I get home. Because you woke up your wife to do it. I know, I woke up the whole family just for a radio bit. And you had quite a traumatic weekend this weekend. Yeah, my dog got rushed to the emergency vet, which I was stoked about. So stoked, because as you can imagine, it was expensive. He's okay though, spoiler alert. But what did he do? You'll find out on the podcast. Enjoy. So good morning this morning to those in the Southern Lakes area of New Zealand. Beautiful part of the country, isn't it? Queenstown, Wanaka, Alexandra. Love Alexandra.

Coldest and hottest part of the country, right? Well, yeah. But it's beautiful when it's like snowing in winter and in summer. But good morning. Yeah, I got to experience the Mount, Mount Maunganui over the weekend there with the family. It's beautiful. Another beautiful part of the country as well. Everyone, I feel like you need to climb the Mount. It's something I don't know if you get kicked out of the area, if you don't do it.

You do. That's official. Every time you go there, you're like, right, when are we climbing the Mount? Get up there, take a selfie just so you can document it so you can stay a couple of days. But what I noticed, there was a lot of hens parties and stag do's over the weekend.

Oh, really? At the mount? Yeah, just a lot. Some poor guy was in some Lycra suit with some sort of blow-up, a doll next to him, playing guitar. And as I sort of walked out, he was like, hey, it's you, you know, the radio, join on, Ben. I was like, he'll help me out.

Firstly, he wanted money. He needed to busk enough to get a beer. that was his challenge okay and i was like i don't have it you don't have cash like you don't have cash i don't have cash my wife didn't have cash that my kids didn't even have cash no one had cash and then you took him inside right and just paid with your foster no i should have done that i said to him i'll sing a song with you. Like, I'll sing a song. Because he had a guitar. He had, you know, a spandex suit on. He was obviously looking quite cold out there.

And I was like, what songs do you know? And he's like, I don't play guitar. Oh, God. And I was like, oh, mate. So, yeah. You're hamstrung from the start. So I sort of had to walk away. And so I go, well, good luck with that, mate.

And then later on in the evening, it was like two hen's do's in the place we're having dinner. They're very lovely people, but they had challenges to do. Yeah, right. Did you have challenges to do for your hen's do? For my first wedding, yes. I had a whole list of things. We went out in town and I had to slap a bear bum.

I had to kiss a strange boy, all that kind of stuff. But I reckon that guys will do anything. As soon as they see a hen's party come along and you've got these random, I'm like, how am I going to tick off these tasks? Because you want to help people out, right? Yeah. First guy I asked,

he's like, pants down, slap them on the bum. I was like, okay, guys are very obliging. Yeah. The lady came over, she was getting married. She's like, hey, I've got to tick something off my list.

She had like a playing card with like written on, a whole lot of those. She's like, I want to do this one with you. I was like, oh God, my family are here. What's going to happen? But it's actually pretty, it was pretty tame. It was like, ask a guy, like a guy you don't know what his last number was on his phone. And then you have to call it. I had to hand the phone over to her.

And I was like, oh yeah, sweet. You know, my phone. And then you're like, oh God, who did I call her. And I was like, oh, yeah, sweet. You get my phone. And then you're like, oh, God, who did I call? But then I was like, oh, it's the restaurant. The last call I made was the restaurant that we were in. Because they were running like 10 to 15 minutes late. So I was like, yeah, the number, it's the restaurant. So she started calling it.

And then I was like, oh, it would be funny if I run around the other side of the restaurant and I pick up the phone. I had a little comedy bit. You know, because then I could talk to her like so I ran around and the poor lady who was behind the counter of the restaurant had no idea what we're doing I was like is the phone ringing is the phone ringing she's like no I was like no the phone's ringing it's and I was like ring again yelling to the lady she's like I'm ringing again and I was like the phone's gonna ring and the lady held up the phone she's like it's not ringing it's, I don't know what you're doing, but it's not ringing.

I was like, oh, okay. I went back to the lady. She goes, oh, no, it's HelloFresh. I've rang them four times. And so I'd been talking to HelloFresh about some stuff. Did she cancel your order? Yeah. Well, she's changed the address to go to her house.

Yeah, I was like, oh, I rang a man in my wife's phone. And it was like, oh, that's what I did. So anyway. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Pretty unsettled weekend for us. Oh, yeah, very. A high drama weekend, right? Yeah, so I've got, just to give you up to speed with who's in our family,

we've got a three-year-old and almost two-year-old. And we have a little dog, Leo. How's the dog? Now, you've given little dog, Leo. How's the dog? Now, you've given everyone's ages. How old's the dog? Nine. I hate when people ask me that about our dog. I love our dog.

I'm like, where's the dog? And the kids are like, you, you. They know when the birthday is. They know everything. He's 23rd of May is his birthday, but I don't know. He might be eight. Okay, right. Yeah, something like that.

But at the weekend, I gave my son grapes. And if you have a dog, you probably can see where this is going. But he drops some grapes on the floor, or so we think. This is your son? My son, Basti, dropped a grape on the floor, we think. So then I see my dog chewing. So he's eaten something off the floor. And then you're trying to get out of a three-year-old.

Did you drop a grape? He's like, yeah. Did the dog eat it? Yeah. Are you sure? What color was the grape? It was green. But then is he telling the truth?

You're like, oh, because grapes, if you don't know, they're really toxic for dogs. But the thing is, some people feed their dogs grapes and they're fine. But other dogs, it can be fatal. And it doesn't show up for a while. It makes their liver or kidneys shut down or something like that. Dogs are very, like I've got a dog, I love my dog, but it's very hard to know exactly what they can or can't eat. Yeah.

Like they can have a lot of other fruit and vegetables. I had fed my dog grapes before, a couple. I had a little game and I just like, I just bounced it off the table and he'd catch it. And I did it once and I was like, wife I was like look at this look at this and she's like don't do that they can't eat grapes and it was like oh my god so then I had to ring the helpline you know the vet and they said keep an eye on him fortunately he was fine so maybe my dog's okay they said to you keep an eye on him because we rang and we were like what are we doing

they said he needs to go straight away to be like, he needs to vomit and he needs to get rid of the grapes because it could kill him. So I was like, are we sure? Are we sure? Are we sure? Yeah, because you don't know because it's only your son that's potentially seen the dog or not. The more I'm like, okay, Bastion, did he eat the grape?

He's like, yeah, he ate the grape. You're like, no, but it's bad for him. Did he eat the grape? Yeah. And you're like, oh. This is going to cost mummy like $1,000. Did he eat the grape? It's a lot of money but it's bad for him. Did he eat the grape? Yeah. And you're like, oh. This is going to cost mummy like $1,000. Did he eat the grape? It's a lot of money and it's bad for him.

So I was like getting really annoyed and upset at this moment. And my husband's like, don't get upset. He's going to be okay. We'll go and get him sorted. And I was like, I'm not upset about that. I'm upset about the money. So my dog, he went in there. They made him spew up.

And then I was like to the nurses did you see a grape was there a grape they were like it could have disintegrated so we still don't know you want to know you want to have that grape

$380 later just to make him spew I was like oh I hope he ate that grape he's fine chocolate cake's the other one that I get

that the dogs obviously can't have chocolate it's like why is it messing with their system I mean I see the things my dog can't have chocolate. It's like, why is it a mess with their system? I mean, I see the things my dog has eaten and puts his face, and I'm like, all of a sudden he can't eat chocolate? And I'm like.

And I was like, do we just wait and see? But then I was like, if he dies, I'm going to feel bad that he wasn't even worth $380. How awful. Oh, so the dog's good now? The dog's fine. Happy as Larry. So maybe he can eat grapes. Yeah, I don't want to tease it out.

Don't tease it out. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Something else that may give us a bit of a smile this morning because, you know, we're up early. We're at them at work. It's school holidays at the moment. And, you know, a lot of people are on the juggle right now listening. You know, they're trying to get work going. They're looking after the kids.

And I thought, you know, well, one of my daughters is a teenager now, Sienna, and we do the podcast together. She loves talking on the radio, but would she love talking on the radio at 6.50 in the morning in the holidays? Now, what we've done, this is doubly worse for my wife, Amanda, who joins us right now because we've woken her up. Good morning, Amanda. Too soon.

What's that? Good morning. Was. Too soon. What's that? Good morning. Was it too soon for Christmas? Why too soon for Christmas? It's October the 7th. Oh, I thought you meant too soon to call you. Well, it is too soon to call you. That was my second point.

Thank you for terrifying the LA. That was his idea, Amanda. Yeah, yeah. So Megan and me this morning thought, you know, it is school holidays. Maybe we could do a little thing, wake up the teenager in the household. We're not going to be popular. No, but also not popular with you because we woke you up as well. School holidays.

Yeah, you're a teacher, school holidays. But anyway, can we go through to Sienna right now? What time would she usually get up? Well, she's pretty good during the school term. She'll get up at like 6.30, 7 o'clock, depending on what she's got on. But in the holidays, she can sleep easily to 8.30, 9 o'clock if she wanted to. If she wanted to. She would go 10 o'clock if she needed.

Okay. So do you want me to just put the phone to her ear? Where are you right now? I'm in my room. Can I walk to her room? Yeah, that'd be nice if you could just, you know, quicken up the process just a little bit. You've woken your wife up early. I don't think passive aggressiveness is a good idea. I thought maybe you'd be hovering outside the door, you know, to a bedroom.

But anyway, you're still in bed. Turn down the passag, Ben. She's doing us a favor. Sorry, Megan, you're right. Hello, Sienna. Good morning. Morning. Sorry, Megan, you're right. Yeah. Hello, Sienna. Good morning. Morning.

It's Megan and me, Sienna. Good morning. How are you doing? This is a new thing we'd like to do on the radio this week. It's called Wake Up Your Teenager. Okay. Okay, how are you feeling? Update, weather, what's it looking like today?

What's happening today? What's on the agenda? My eyes won happening today? What's on the agenda? My eyes weren't open. What's on the podcast this week? Here's your plug. Oh, yeah. Who's the guest? I don't remember.

You were so mean. We had Dame Lisa Carrington last week, didn't we, on the When I Grow Up podcast. That was good. What was your favorite thing about that chat? Medal. Medal. Yeah, we got to whole of the gold medals. This is like talking to teenagers sometimes.

They give you one word answers. All right, so you know, hopefully this will be a bad dream for you, all right? Mm-hmm. Okay, you have a great day. You have a great day. You can get up now. You can tidy your room. I wish your dad's idea. There'll be some towels on the floor.

There'll be some, you'll have some things to take back to the kitchen. You can tidy those up for me. God, you're in trouble when you get home. No. All right, have a great day. Miss you. Bye. There we go.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Dear Megan. Someone has slid into Megan's DMs again with a bit of a dilemma, and I keep going back and forth on this one every time we talk about it, so we thought we'd put it to you. We need to help out this particular person with a definitive answer. So the message reads, Hey team, I really need your help.

I accidentally dented my friend's car when I moved it and never mentioned it. It's being fixed now, but my friend insists it was her husband who did it and keeps giving him a hard time about it. He always denies it and I feel terrible about the whole situation. Should I come clean or just leave it alone? I'm worried about her reaction. She seems to forgive him, but what if she can't forgive me? What would you guys do?

It doesn't say when it happened, like how long has it been? If it's been months, I feel like it's too long to say anything. Yeah, because it's always one of those things. At the time when it happens, as awkward as it is. Just front it, eh? Yeah, because the longer you leave it, it is really hard. The poor husband's getting thrown under the bus. Every time they hang out, any time there's a car mentioned,

he's probably like, you dented my car. Have you damaged anyone else's car before? No, no, I don't think so. I would always front foot it, though. you dented my car. Have you damaged anyone else's car before? No. No, I don't think so. I would always front foot it though. I rode off my car. Well, it was the car that I used to drive to school. We lived on a farm and I'd drive to school,

have my license. And for some reason, I just got petrol, like not long before. And I went to put the speedometer in, you know, like to read, to click it on, to see how far, I don't know why I was interested to see how far I'd get on the tank and I got my arm stuck between like the steering wheel sticking it through and the indicator and for another weird reason I didn't

put on the brake either I just veered off straight into a tree and then I had to go tell my mom and my stepdad and it was like the one they'd given me to drive to school. And I had to go, oh, guys, I've just had. I started crying. And then I think they felt so bad for it. They couldn't get angry. So maybe that's a tactic. You're lucky that you're OK. I was so stupid, too.

I was like, what was I thinking? Let me put my arm through the steering wheel while I'm driving. I panicked. So I think if this particular person could maybe start crying if they did confess, maybe that would help. That's my only experience. At this point, though, I don't think I'd say anything. But then the guilt can eat you up. And then is she going to get angry if you say it now?

Because she's like, why don't you say something at the time? I've given him so much grief. I don't know. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We are in the middle of today's DM Megan 0800 the hits or 4487. We really need to get back to this person with an answer. And to be honest, I don't know what they should do. Not at this point.

So basically someone dented their friend's car when they moved it. They never mentioned it. It has been fixed now. But the friend insists it was the husband who did it and keeps giving him a hard time about it. So the friend sitting there hearing this being like, well, it was me. They want to know, do they come clean or leave it alone now that it's been fixed? She might forgive him, but will she forgive the friend? Now, a lot of people have commented.

It's pretty 100% one way on the Facebook post. People have said you should have been honest in the first place, but now you need to come clean. Karma will come for you, someone said. If you were given a hard time for something you never did, how would you feel? I would come clean and admit it. It's affecting their marriage. So own up now and tell her how sorry you are,

pay the damages, and a friend would forgive you. Yeah, because that's the thing now, the husband's involved. Maybe if the husband wasn't getting grief. And there's one thing, you know, like when you get grief in front of someone, so it might seem fun, she might be like, he's a bad driver, he crashed my car. But then behind the scenes, it might actually be an issue that they're arguing about. You're right, you don't know that. And he's like, I didn't do it.

Poor guy. But we need to get your calls and texts. James, what do you think? Should she tell? Yes, she should have told in the first place. I'm actually quite upset with her not telling because she's destroying the marriage. Yeah. Well, you're right.

You don't know what's going on with the marriage, do you, because of it. So you think now, okay, she should have done it. She probably knows that she should have done it at the start. Now she needs to confess? Yep. Her friend is going to be really angry if we're not coming clean, but she needs to do it because otherwise the friend will find out eventually in the end

and it could destroy their friendship as well. But she might not. She might. How would she find out? The guilt would just eat you up. Things come out of the wash eventually. We should all know that. It's one of those conversations you start with your friend. You're like, hey.

You start with a really long hey. And they're like, what's this? So, something to tell you. How angry would you be? Yeah. Okay, James. Thanks for your call. Paula, what do you think?

Should she tell the friend? I would have to say no. I think because... Oh, you're saying no? I would say no. Not at this point. She should have said something at the beginning when she did it. Now it's a bit of a mess, I think, and the likelihood

is when the husband finds out the friendship's likely not going to go well. Yeah, that's my fear. We don't know how much time has passed either. That's it. That's the thing. She should have come clean at the beginning.

If it's a couple of weeks, I reckon you'll be fine. But if we're talking months, the friend is going to be... That's it. Why didn't you tell me? Okay, there's both sides of the story. Someone also has just texted through here, Megan, going, get her to call her friend live on the radio to confess. Oh, God.

I don't think we want to put someone through that. Kathy, do you want to give the last call? What should she do? Go and talk to the husband. Go and apologize to the husband and ask him how she should handle it because he knows how deep he's in. He's going to say tell her because I've been wearing it. Thanks very much.

But you're right, though. That's probably a good first approach. You can stop on the in the blow and say hey we actually found out who did it and it wasn't me but yeah funny story funny story guys just for me okay no one else is finding it funny uh yeah that's how you'd start that conversation will know how to handle his wife and how deep it is. It could be just something that they bring up as well. I mean, ingesting a conversation.

It could actually be doing harm to the marriage. Go and find out. Okay. And then ask him if she needs to go and apologise to her friend directly or not

or do it together. Okay, appreciate everyone's calls and texts. So many texts are floating through at the moment. Someone's saying big bunch of flowers, bottle of whiskey and apology. That's what they need. Oh, appreciate everyone's calls and texts. So many texts are floating through at the moment. Someone's saying, big bunch of flowers, bottle of whiskey and apology.

That's what they need. Oh, I'd forgive anything with that. So I think in conclusion, we need a summary, Megan. She should have said something in the first place. Yes. Most people are saying you need to talk to your friend. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast.

David Williams. Okay, we can talk about David Williams? Yes. Yeah. Love David Williams. Very funny guy. Obviously a comedian from the UK, Little Britain, about David Williams? Yes. Yeah. I love David Williams. Very funny guy. Obviously a comedian from the UK, Little Britain, and now an author as well.

And my kids just love David Williams' books. And we seem to bond with David Williams. We've talked to him a couple of times over Zoom. He follows The Hits Breakfast. He's one of the four people I think that follows The Hits Breakfast on Instagram. Weirdly. Yeah. One of them is very famous.

Yeah. And so he seems to like us. And we talked to him on Zoom just before he was coming to New Zealand. And we were like, I'll come in and see us, that sort of thing. And didn't think he would,

but he did. He surprised us, as well as Mike Hosking in the building, right? It was the worst day for me to be away. But you had the wiggles in studio and David Williams came and crashed. Just burst through the door. The interview.

Banged on the window because, you know, like, let me in. And then came on through. He was giving you a big cuddle throughout. He did, like, a nonstop cuddle. One of those ones which was lovely, you know, when you're embracing someone and then you were like, oh, I better stop, you know, just so because maybe they're waiting on me to stop, you know. And then I was like, oh, no, he's still hugging.

So I put my arm back around him again, you know. I was like this. It went on for about three or four minutes the hug then he went around talking to the wiggles poor Simon uh he was like he was like oh you're a lot older than the other wiggles yeah very funny uh very funny moment as he sort of wandered his way around the studio and then he was like uh come see me in the weekend if you hate the wiggles come see me but he also on our zoom chat um told you to ask a very personal question at the show about about his underpants which i'll fill you in a wee bit later on whether i asked it in front of my kids because i took up my kids along and now they love david williams he was doing some sort of shows for kids during the day

and then he was doing this more grown up one in the evening but then I was like my kids are getting a bit older now and one of my daughters had musical theatre camp so she couldn't go to the kids show so I was like how bad could it be and there was definitely a few jokes I was like oh okay that bad oh okay I mean it's very funny like I really enjoyed it but there was definitely a couple of jokes yeah that made you freeze and be like someone you're like I'll go over the heads and others were like're like, I'll go over the heads and others were like, well,

that's definitely not going over the heads. There's no way I can explain that one in the car ride on the way home sort of thing. But he had a really interesting story

because he talked about Little Britain, which I found interesting and as well as Britain's Got Talent where he was a judge on that with Simon Cowell. Interesting.

Yeah, and Simon Cowell's production company, he sort of puts it together. I imagine Simon Cowell is a pretty tough guy to work with. He's a businessman, but I reckon he's pretty hard to work with. Well, he was saying, David Williams was saying that, you know, they would go along, do these live shows,

people audition for Britain's Got Talent, and it would be like 12 o'clock, David Williams was meant to turn up with the other judges. He's like, well, 12 o'clock's an easy time to get to work by. Yeah, lunchtime. So he's like, I got there at 12 o'clock, got my makeup, ready to go, and Simon Cowell wouldn't be there. And then it'd be like two, three hours later they'd get a call at 3 o'clock

and then they'd be like, oh, Simon's just woken up at 3 o'clock. They're like, okay, he's just woken up. The audience is waiting. Everyone's waiting. They're like, oh, he'll be here soon. so all of the crowd is in that studio waiting four o'clock rolls around so that's four hours later and it's like oh simon's just having a bath oh dear god and then eventually you get there around five you know five o'clock and then he would have a cigarette and an ivy drip just quickly and david williams is well, they can't cancel each other out.

Then he would get on stage and always kind of like throw David Williams under the bus, go, well, sorry we're late. David Williams had to eat a three-course meal or something. I can't believe he would just keep people waiting for five hours. Boss move, eh? Boss move. I guess it's your production company. The arrogance of the man. Who's going to fire him?

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Today man. Who's going to fire him? The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. Today, Eminem is going to be a grandfather. Is he? For the first time. Hayley? Yeah, Hayley, his daughter. Hayley having a kid, which is a pretty emotional video I watched.

So Eminem has never been a grandfather. You have never ridden a bus until recently too, had you, Megan? Nah, you made my dream come true. I actually really enjoyed it. I went up the top of a double-decker bus right up the front. It was a good time. Well, yeah, it kind of gave us an idea because you'd never ever ridden a public bus before and we got you to ride one.

You did enjoy it, like you say. So we thought we could travel around the country and we're going to do it next week and help some people do things for the first time. It's the Never Have I Ever and Never Have You Ever Tour. Thanks to gas. Gas is helping us get around the country as well. Gas petrol service stations. Instant discounts.

Loyalty program to get fuel discounts every week. The Never Have You Ever Tour on the hits. So next week we're heading to places like Christchurch, Wellington, Palmerston North, Auckland, Whangarei as well. If you've never done anything, we'd love to make your dreams come true. And we wanted to know this morning some simple things that would surprise us that maybe you've never done anything, we'd love to make your dreams come true. And we wanted to know this morning some simple things that would surprise us that maybe you've never done. Producer Grace joins us in studio because this blows my mind. The simplest thing.

I've never met anyone that hasn't done what you haven't done. I have never eaten tomato sauce. Ever. Never, ever. What about on a pie? No, gross. So what happens if you're somewhere getting fish and chips and someone just sprays tomato sauce all over the top of it? Well, I normally don't make a fuss, but I feel like I would make a fuss about it.

So you'd pick away the chips that weren't touching the sauce? Yeah, yeah, definitely. Oh, I just wouldn't eat any chips. Really? I just can't. So how do you know you don't like it? It just freaks me out. I don't know.

You're a Kiwi. I know. I just hate it. So ketchup, tomato sauce, all the same? Or is there one? I can do like pizza sauce. And I can actually, I do like tomato soup. Oh, really?

Tomato sauce is so much yummier. I just, I don't know. It's like a sweeter tomato soup. I don't know. It just grosses me out. I don't really like condiments anyway. But she's also not keen on trying it. I will not try it.

You will not get me to try it. Well, that's next week on the Never Have You Ever Tour. No. That's next week. We've got some time to talk about this. So these are the things. This surprises me.

Not even like, I get it, you might try it and not like it. Doesn't your parents always say that to the kids? I'm like, just try it once.

Just try it. If you don't like it, that's fine. I think my parents respected me. They were like, no, you don't have to. My kids eat it by the spoonful. They would have it on,

my brother used to eat tomato sauce sandwiches. That's gross. Put a luncheon in there. Luncheon, whatever meat that was that mum would make for school lunches. And then some tomato sauce all over the top. So these are the sort of things we want right now. 4, 4, 8, 7, 0, 800, the hits.

We've had a few people comment on our Facebook post. Someone said never broken a bone. Yeah, I'm the same with that one. I've never broken a bone. Haven't you? No. Well, we can do that next week. Yeah, I'm the same with that one. I've never broken a bone. Haven't you? No. Well, we can do that next week. Yeah, I don't know how we can do that.

I've never driven a manual. I could help you with that. I'm pretty good at driving manuals. Taught my husband how to drive one. Someone had never put gas in their car, right? Yeah, 49 years old. Isla has never put petrol in her own car. I know my mum doesn't like doing that,

but she's definitely done it before. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We're hitting the road next week on our Never Have You Ever Tour. We want to make some of your dreams, big or small, come true. For me, the most interesting ones are the ones that,

the everyday things that you think everyone's done, but people haven't done, right, Megan? Yeah, the simple things. I want to hear one that maybe your kids something that kids do all the time that you've never done like imagine if someone's never been down a slide. Oh yeah. I would just like to experience these things with

people for the first time. Well that's what we're doing next week. We're going to places like Christchurch, Wellington, Palmerston North, Auckland, Whangarei as well. It's all thanks to Gas Petrol Service Stations. Never miss a fuel discount again. Download the 100% Kiwi Gas app to get the North, Auckland, Whangarei as well. It's all thanks to gas petrol service stations. Never miss a fuel discount again. Download the 100% Kiwi Gas app to get discount offers delivered straight to your phone.

We're travelling around the country and we want to make some of these things come true. Yeah, like Rebecca, what have you never done before? I've never got a tattoo before. Okay. Now, fear of needles or just a fear of bad decisions? Just never really crossed my mind. And possibly a fear of needles as well.

Ben can't relate because there's not much real estate left. I found it was probably like a big thought to get the first one. And once you've kind of got your first one and then you're kind of away and then now I'm getting all sorts. I mean, I've got skibbity riz sigma dad or something on my calf that my kids decide I mean you know that's where I'm at these days yeah they started being meaningful and now it's just like this right put it on there for a laugh so I don't know if you're at that stage there well only only in the past couple of years I got my first one and I don't really have any desire to get any more. Would you get one?

Would you get one? Rebecca? Me? Yes. Yes, I would get one. Do you know what you would want? I do. I have got an idea in mind.

Okay. All right. And whereabouts would you put it? I'm thinking under, like on the side of my ribs. Okay. Does that hurt, Ben? I haven't actually never had any of the ribs.

Wow. You could get a matching one with Rebecca. Yeah, we could. What are we going to get? We'll talk about this off air, all right? All right, Rebecca. Well, thanks for that. And is it Eliza?

Good morning. Good morning. Yes, it is Eliza. Okay. What have you never done? I've never tried venison before. I would imagine that a few people would have maybe not tried that. I think I've accidentally tried it.

Right, yeah. And I wasn't a big fan. It's interesting, the animals that some people are okay to eat and others they go, oh, I wouldn't do it. No, I don't want to eat Bambi. Yeah. I don't, it's not, yeah. Are you keen to try it though, Eliza? Yes, and I used to be a cook for four years.

And yeah, I've always seen it in the slow cooker and stuff, but never ever tried it. And I've always been keen, but never the first option in my head all the time. Yeah, that's right. Okay. Well, venison, okay. As a chef, you would have thought that maybe you would have tried it,

but you don't have to. Yes. Yes. Until this morning and I thought of it. I was like, okay. As a chef, you would have thought that maybe you would have tried it, but you don't have to. Yes, yes, until this morning, and I thought of it. I was like, oh, I've never tried venison. You're like, you know what? I should have tried it before serving it to those customers. No. Well, we're going to Christchurch. Maybe we can do that with you, Eliza.

Oh, I would love to try venison with you guys. Oh, I appreciate you listening to the show, okay? Keep this coming through. Never ever, ever. I'm not going to eat Bambi you can do that with Eliza someone's never been on a rollercoaster someone's never been stung by a bee

I don't know if we can facilitate that one the bees die right we don't want to be the death of any bees as well never eaten an oyster have you eaten an oyster no I haven't you're going to make me do it aren't you now I am

it's like cold mucusy. It's like cold mucusy. The texture's not there. Okay. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Williams, we love David Williams. Great children's author, comedian for many years on shows like Little Britain. And he came in, you're away.

Gutted. Friday before last, he unannounced just waltzed into the studio while we were interviewing the Wiggles and it was a rollercoaster chaotic but in the best way

very very funny the Wiggles I don't know what they thought about David Williams coming in but he was about to do his live shows around the country

and he didn't you say you saw a couple of the Wiggles at the show they were yeah like incognito they're not in their colours yeah I went up and saw them

look it's funny how all of a sudden they just blingognito. They're not in their colours. Yeah, I went up and saw them. Look, it's funny how all of a sudden they just blinged in when they're not wearing the bright coloured skimmies. And then when you see them in the skimmies, you're like, oh, it's the wiggles. But yeah, they were there at the show. I went along to one of the shows. I went to one of the more of the adult shows

because we couldn't go. My kids love David Williams. They love his books. And I was like, nah, my kids are growing up. It'll be fine. There was a few things in there that weren't quite fine, but I really enjoyed it. I had a great time.

And so he dared me beforehand. He's like, if you're coming along, you need to ask a question because I do question and answers on stage. And the question that he dared me to ask him was like, can I come backstage and see you in your underpants? Now, we got along to the show, and I told my kids that I was going to ask a question. There was a QR code on the screen.

If you want to ask a question, just put your phone up. Did you warn your daughters what the question was? I did. I said, this is the context. Yeah. And my daughter, Sienna, did the QR code for me. Then she entered in my seat number. I'm like, great.

They'll come around with a microphone if I ask a question. I'll do it from the comfort of my seat. No, no, no. No, they didn't. The lights came on mid-second half. David Williams on stage. They're like, these are the people's names that are going to ask questions. Come on up the front.

I'm like, oh, God, I'm going to have to ask them in front of the lights up. Ask him if I could go backstage and see him in his underpants. I kind of gave it some context in front of everyone. Talked to you on our radio show. You dared me to ask a question. Here's the audio of me asking him. You dared me ask your questions so here i am doing it i didn't realize it was going to be in front of everyone but anyway uh that was can i come backstage and see you in your underpants and then the second part to that is after seeing your poster for edinburgh do you still have such a hairy chest well this is a lovely question. His chest is not quite as hairy as it was. Okay, that wasn't a

random question. Do you like hairy chest? I haven't thought too much about it before until tonight. Meanwhile your daughter's like, what's happening? Well yeah, so he was like, do you like hairy chest? Because he did have a photo, because he showed lots of photos and videos of his career, and he had a very hairy chest at one stage.

What? So you went from, you were asking him a personal question, you were like, do you know what, that's not personal enough, I'm going to ask him about his hairy chest at one stage. What? So you went from, you were asking him a personal question. You're like, do you know what? That's not personal enough. I'm going to ask him about his hairy chest as well. You doubled down. I did double down stupidly. And he was like, well, do you like it?

As you would have heard me there, I was like, oh, I never thought too much about it, but maybe I do. I don't know. And then he asked me, which just after that, he was like, what about you? Are you shaved? Or like all the way, all over. And I'm sitting there, got a great laugh from the audience I'm with the microphone my kids are sitting not far from where I was I'm like hey

I've I will just pass the mic to the next person now and so I let the next person deal with that I was like I can't answer that in front of everyone was there any awkward questions from your daughters on the ride home or did everyone just ignore some of the content we definitely ignored some stuff it was definitely one of those moments as i said earlier where there were some times i was like oh that joke will go over their heads and then other times i'm like no that won't go i don't know how i'm gonna explain that one i want to talk about it but the hits the jonah and ben podcast navigating the school holidays at the moment my kids getting a little bit older which is not quite as hard as when they were younger. Now they take care of themselves. Nowadays, it's me more embarrassing them.

That's part of it. I'm going, guys, you've got time. I want to do something to you to embarrass you. That sounds like bliss, them taking care of themselves. Them to be able to feed themselves and go to the toilet. Don't take that for granted, Ben. True. That they can take themselves to the toilet yeah i'm not wiping any backsides i'm not doing anything i'm just i'm in that sweet spot it's a sweet spot of embarrassing them the other day i was telling you about my new game that i like to do of just tooting and waving at people while i look away and they look directly at the person looking up to them often kids from the school that's mean i know i did a little video on instagram and nuts

as well millions of people loved it, except for my kids. They definitely love it. But they get me back, and they've got a really good trick at the moment, and I keep falling for it as well. Went to David Williams the other night, went out, and they wanted to get a snack at halftime, and I was like, well, I'll take them to the show that maybe they shouldn't have gone to.

So I'm like, sweet, again, you can have my card. You stand in line. Don't even have to stand in line with them these days they can have the card and swipe and do their thing but they came back with some peanut M&M's and quite a big bag and I went oh god what did that cost me and they were like $19 and I was like $19 I was like what you paid $19 for the M&M's and this was me oh what $19 and then they for the M&Ms? This was amazing. Oh, what? $19? And then they went. Cost of living.

And they went, no, it was actually like $9. But don't you feel better now that it was only $9? And they devised the tactic. They thought if they came up to me and I said $9, I would have gone $9. Yeah. But they went for a much higher amount. And so I got wound up. And then when they brought it back to like $9 or whatever it was, I was like, oh, well, that's not as bad as $19.

That's genius. It's actually quite a good trick. You could even try that with Andrew when you buy some shoes or something. I always say how much they were before they were on sale. You're like, these are $400 shoes. It'd be $400. But I only paid $20. Yeah.

Big discount. So, yeah, if you are navigating the school holidays, and maybe you need a night out. The parents need a night out. We've got some tickets to a brand new movie, which you saw navigating the school holidays, and maybe you need a night out. The parents need a night out. We've got some tickets to a brand new movie, which you saw the other night. Joker. What is it called, Ben? Well, I know.

Well, it's the sequel to the Joker. Actually, I'm not the only one that's screwing up. Now, you know how to say it, right? It is Joker folie a deux. Okay. Joaquin Phoenix. Is how you're supposed to say it, yes. Lady Gaga's in the movie.

But I'm too scared to say it because it's french it is french but you're not the only person that struggled with it this is a whole bunch of uh journalists who should know but still struggle with the movie name a new trailer is out for joker fo les undos did i pronounce that right i think you did miss french there joker folie du is out with joaquin Phoenix. Welcome back. A new trailer is out for Joker Folie Zidou. He called Joker Folie a des Mieux.

Joker with a French name, which I call Joker 2. Joker starring Joaquin Phoenix. Joker Folie and, uh... No, no. I even Joaquin Phoenix. Joaquin Phoenix. Folie a deux is the movie. The hits.

The Jono and Ben podcast. movie Christmas you're a huge fan Megan of Christmas you love Christmas I do it's just like the whole feeling of I don't know it's the lead up

you know there's so many lights and it's just a feeling I do love Christmas but you go quite early November you put your Christmas tree up yeah because I want to feel

the Christmas spirit as much as possible I think my Christmas tree ends up being up for like three months why don't you just leave it up then you to feel the Christmas spirit as much as possible. I think my Christmas tree ends up being up for like three months. Why don't you just leave it up? Then you can feel the Christmas spirit all year.

No, because then it's too much of a good thing. So we take it down at the end of January usually. So yeah, that's like three months. Three months, okay. A quarter of the year.

Because came out here in New Zealand, you know, they were copying it because, you know, in September, in late September they were getting into

the Christmas spirit by bringing out all the winter, well, winter jerseys what winter jerseys Christmas jersey everyone's like it's too hot to wear those in New Zealand it's too soon to bring out Christmas decorations and Christmas paraphernalia is it because Christmas is a stressful time and people don't want to think about it too early is that what it is maybe I feel like my kids my kids are on the Halloween buzz at the moment so I feel like I can't maybe november's a good time like you say because you clear halloween off your calendar yeah that's kind of why we did it you clear halloween and then you're straight into christmas but you know at some stage you know in the next you know couple of weeks mariah

carey she'll get thawed out won't she didn't she make a joke about that last year that she thawed herself out of like an ice rock and she was like, right, here I am. And at some stage, you know, radio stations around the world will start playing Christmas music. That'll happen. Probably December onwards, you know? Oh, that's too late. Some might even go in November, but will any go in October is the question that you wanted to ask, right? You know you want to hear this song.

Do you want to hear it? 4487, should we be the first radio show in the world to play this song in its entirety next? Does it give you tingles? It gives me tingles. It's good. I feel like we've gone too early. I feel like we've gone too early. Producer Grace has come through on the text

and she's not into it. Oh, she says no. She's like, she's first through. 4487. Producer Ellie is standing on her feet doing a thumbs up. Producer Grace says I hate this. Hate? And we're open to, are we open to other options?

Other Christmas songs potentially? Yeah, okay. But will we be the first show to play a Christmas song next or not? Yes. 4, 4, 8, 7. Oh God. Oh, we just got a text from the boss. Did we? Yeah. Okay, we'll see. Okay, 4, 4, 8, 7. Give us a text right now.

It's your show. It's the people's show. It's the people's show. You tell us. Do you want to hear a Christmas song or is it too early? The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. Kmart and other stores, you know, getting a little bit of flack for going too early on Christmas.

Kmart went in September with a lot of their Christmas stuff. I think I saw last week farmers had put up their Christmas decoration situation. So they must have waited till like the start of October. Right. But that's up. And we thought, you know, maybe we could be the first radio show, the first station in the world to play a Christmas song. And now that I've suggested it and talked to you about it,

I'm backing out of it. I'm thinking it is too soon. You know better than to dangle anything Christmas in front of me because I'll gobble it up. I'm so keen for Christmas. I'm hanging out for it. Okay. So have we gone too early if we play a Christmas tune?

I'm saying yes. The text machine. So many texts this morning. We appreciate it. 4, 4, 8, 7. Probably, to be fair, reading through them, slightly in favor of playing the Christmas songs. Slightly in favor.

But then there's a lot of hard no's. Like, I'll go to other stations. As long as you come back, I'm okay. Other people want other songs, not Mariah as well. But this is the song that you want to play if we play it. Yeah, I want to play a bit of Mariah Carey. It is the song for Christmas, right? This one. Yeah, it does feel too soon. It doesy. It is the song for Christmas, right? This one.

Yeah, it does feel too soon. It's that Christmas song. Oh, it's 79 Days to Christmas. It's October the 7th. Look at the harmonies we could do. It's a long runway, Megan. It's a long runway. It's okay.

It doesn't mean we're going to play Christmas songs all the time from here on in. It just means we'll play this one and then have a break for probably at least six weeks and then come back to it. We're dipping our toes in. But we thought we would get our bot, boss, Matt, our boss

Matt on to give us the definitive answer. If he says no, I will go with it and I will not play Mariah Carey. Good morning, Matt. Good morning, you two. How was your weekend? Don't try and butter him up.

I'm just trying to get a gauge if it was a really bad weekend. Maybe he'll say no. How was it? The weekend was okay, mate. How was yours? Yeah, it was a bit busy, actually. It was an emergency room situation, but we'll get to that later on the show if you stick around. Yeah, I'm sorry to hear.

Hope the kids are okay. The kids are fine. Or you. Yeah, no, both. Everyone's fine. All the people are fine. But this is an emergency situation right now on the radio, Matt,

because we want to know, you know, should we dip our toes into the Christmas pool? Is it too early? I'm saying maybe it is now. I'm starting to think No, it's not.

I'm starting to think it might be too early. See, here's the thing. I've been sitting here listening to this that's been unfolding on the show and I know that quite often

you guys paint me out to be some kind of Grinch on the air, but the truth is I'm Cindy Lou, so let's get this on the show. And I know that quite often you guys paint me out to be some kind of Grinch on the air, but the truth is, I'm Cindy Lou, so let's get this on the air. Hey, all right, so we're going to play it. Yes! Okay.

Feels like maybe too soon, but hey, it's been a heck of a year, cost a living and all sorts, so why not? Vegan and Joy. It's happening. First in the world to play a Christmas tune. Here's Mariah. Please stick with us.

It's just one thing I need. The Hits, the to play a Christmas tune. Here's Mariah. Please stick with us. The New Zealand Navy ship, well, one of our ships, sunk over the weekend in Samoa. It hit a reef, is that right? And then it sunk? Yeah, it ran aground. It caught fire. There was some video footage from shore just watching a Navy boat go up in flames and then sink.

So all 75 people on board are all good they're fine which is great news but not great news is the fact that it cost what over like a hundred million dollars for this boat and we got it second hand or something didn't we oh i like the song you're gonna play in the navy yeah do you ever get sick of the song in the navy like as soon as you say i'm in the the Navy, I'm going to be like, In the Navy. I hope not. But I've actually had experience on, I've been on not the same ship.

I've been on three of these Navy ships for different reasons. But my first time on a Navy ship was when I was talking to a Navy officer on, like, chat. Yeah. And then I flew up to Auckland for the big day out, and he took me onto the Navy ship. Oh, was he allowed? Was he sanctioned to do so? Well, you have to, like, get clearance and everything.

So everyone, like, let me on. He was in his, like, officer white. Full whites. Full whites. And we went around, and I remember he showed me a bar, and it was, like, a red velvet curtains and stuff and I was quite young so he was like, right, moving on from here, you're not allowed in here.

But I got to tour the ship and so there is lots of stuff on there that we don't use. So there is like gun situations. I've been up into that main control area where there's buttons that says like guns firing and things like that. So even though we don't probably use the ship to its full capacity, it still would be worth a lot of money. Yeah.

It still has the means to do. As you said, over $100 million. Between that and the inter-islands, it used to be a lot of boats that don't quite make it across the water, don't we? Apparently it was pretty rough. So maybe that had something to do with it rather than someone just not paying attention

to where they were steering it. Well, because you've been on the boat a couple of times. We did try and, you know, before you arrived on the radio show, we tried to come up with a catchphrase. You know, like Radio Hauraki, they've always got catchphrases. Other radio stations cooler than us. And so it was voted on that we should come up with all gravy in the Navy. I like that. That was going to be our catchphrase.

But like everything we do on the show, we kind of do it for a couple of weeks and then we kind of lose interest. But was it all gravy in the Navy? Was it cool in the Navy? Oh man that boat's so cool it's so cool I mean the sleeping quarters are not great but just being able

to like press a button on that ship would be cool I went on the Disney cruise does it compare to the Disney cruise? I think it's a bit more badass than that

You're not going to see like a Broadway musical sort of a show. You can do this on the ship though. Not performing like that as well. Oh, well, so just $100 million. Oh, in the ocean. Gone. Whoopsie.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Weekend, what you saw at the gym. It wasn't just me bragging about going to the gym again. I know I bring you a lot of gym stories but uh i was there and i saw a guy he was walking around he was dragging a duffel bag the standard gym bag with a zip and like a handle uh and he was dragging it around that caught my attention i was like why is he dragging his bag and it was following him around but in the bag was his little dog so it was quite small and it looked

kind of oldish but it just sat there docile and he'd pull it up to a machine he'd do his thing on a machine and the dog would just sit there and wait in the duffel bag and get dragged to the next machine it was i don't think it was going to jump out or anything it was just chilling it was quite happy to do that yeah but it's just an odd scene yeah to to see the guy dragging his little dog around usually you know it was just you reminded me that gym in Whangarei I think I was in uh over the holiday my mom lives up that way and I was like I should go to the gym and I was on the treadmill and next to me a dog jumped up and just went on the treadmill and then they put it on for the dog and away he went I was like what is going on here and apparently that's the dog really liked they put it on for the dog and away he went. I was like, what is going on here? And apparently that's the dog really liked doing it.

It was like one of the gym owner's dogs. And from time to time he'd just get up on the treadmill and go, hey, I'm keen for a walk. The guy's like, it's great. I don't have to walk the dog. And he was next to me and I'm sort of running away going, oh, the dog's going better than me. How do you know when to, like, what if you forgot?

Does it know how to jump off? Yeah. Like when it's had enough? Well, I had you forgot? Does it know how to jump off? Yeah. Like, when it's had enough? Well, I had enough. I kind of left and the dog was still going, so I didn't get to that part. But yeah, very unusual thing. But I imagine people listening right now, they would have seen pets in unusual locations. Yeah, so we put it on our Facebook page.

What is the weirdest thing you've seen someone do with your pet? A lot of walking cats on leashes. Oh, yeah. People put cats in prams and stuff, right? Yeah. I've actually got a neighbor who's got a dog that comes past in a pram, a little doll's pram. And it's just sitting there. Again, it looks kind of old.

So I think the dog's like, this is great. Don't need to walk. Push me around. Someone had a cockatiel sitting on the steering wheel as they drove. I don't know if that's safe. On occasion, he runs from side to side when going around corners. No. Is what someone said.

Another one I've seen in a park, someone feeding mouth to mouth. Like the animal licks it out of the human's mouth. It doesn't say what animal it is. Oh, yeah. I was going to say, that must be part of that. What is it? I don't know what animal it is makes it better. like a mummy bird feeding a baby bird sort of situation yeah yuck oh i hope it's not a dog we were filming uh for our tv show uh rip uh the one that got

cancelled john and ben and in the uk and we wanted to do this beefeater you know the skit where yes the beefeaters stand outside with the big hats and they're not allowed to move no matter what happens and the tv crew thought it'd be funny to put like a live snake around our necks and this lady turned up with a backpack and she had inside like these two tupperware containers she had the snakes apparently she had permits for them and everything but she'd been on the tube with these snakes in a backpack and everything put them out put them around our necks it was frightening then put them back in the tupperware type containers and took them with her it's like you wouldn't even know that someone next you could have snakes in their back your snakes on the train samuel jackson was worried

about snakes on the plane yeah oh my god poor snakes yeah that's what i kind of thought i mean they could kind of she was like oh they can breathe and stuff and they don't mind it but i was like did you ask them yeah so that was a very unusual thing I saw a pet do, but can you beat that? Yeah, what is the weirdest thing you've seen someone do with their pet? The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. This morning, the strangest thing you've seen someone do with their pet. I've seen a guy at the gym.

He's dragging around a duffel bag with his dog in there, and apparently he comes to the gym with him all the time. Just hangs out in the bag while the guy does his exercises. Do you need permission from the gym to do that? Yeah, I don't know. He might have permission. Maybe he does. They didn't seem too concerned about it. 0800 the hits 4487.

We've had a few texts coming through. We've got some hell pizza up for grabs as well. Someone said our cockatoo will call dogs into the room. See, like a whistle. Yeah. Like, as well. Oh, my God.

Weird. And someone said I've got to keep the toilet seat down so our dogs stop drinking out of the toilet. Oh, that's grim. Yeah, I know. My dog's not big enough, thankfully. He's not even the height of the toilet, so he wouldn't get in. But producer Grace has come into the studio. You saw someone do something with their bird?

Yeah, it was at the local library, and the bird, I just the bird would like sit on our shoulder and like read with her she'd be reading a book and the book and the bird would just kind of like go along and read like just sit there with her it's not like reading out loud though no no reading out loud he's not reading the words that's a good voice that's a good parent voice, Megan. Thank you. I feel like the bird was following her. It was really weird. And sometimes it would help her turn the page. Oh, cute. I don't know.

It was a very weird experience. Sounds like the bird is reading it. Yeah. I think it is. Megan will not. Yeah, I think we've got someone throwing out 100 of the hits. Good morning. Is it Liz?

Yep, that's Liz. What did you see someone do with their pet? I used to do it with my pet, so I had better dragons, and I used to take them shopping. Like, did they just sit in the trolley, in the front part of the trolley? No, on my shoulder, or I had a little harness for them. Did you ever get told off by the shopkeepers? I don't know why you'd be told off, but did they ever?

Well, I guess you're allowed to bring them everywhere. What's the deal? They were fine, actually. A lot of them were pretty interested. What are bearded dragons like, temperament-wise? Oh, they're awesome. Awesome. So they don't bite or anything?

I got bit them once, but that was because I was trying to take something out of their throat. Okay. They're quite big, right? They grow quite large. Yeah, they can. Yeah, it used to be from my hand up to my elbow. So yeah, they can be quite big. So you just take it around.

Why did you decide to get a bearded dragon? Oh, I've got a thing about reptiles. Okay. Okay. Like a thing. And what about other people in the supermarket? Were they keen to pet it? Yeah, yeah.

A lot of kids loved them. Also, yeah, adults, everybody just loved them. They thought they were interesting. What was his name? I had Bob and Mango. Are they allowed the free fruit for the kids? Are they okay with that or depending on the age of the lizard? No, they were allowed free fruit.

Oh, that's kind of cool. Oh, well, there we go. I've never seen a lizard in a supermarket. Do they eat pizza? No. No, stupid question. Okay, well then, hell pizza just for you then, Liz. I was just wondering if she would share the pizza.

Oh yeah, I see what you're doing. I was like, well, I'm never had a lizard. I don't know if you can feed it. Exactly. Hey, thank you so much for being here. I'm so happy to be here. I'm so happy to be here. I'm so happy to be here.

I'm so happy to be here. I'm so happy to be here.