Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Ben's a cooool Dad!

Episode Date: August 22, 2024

ON THE SHOW TODAY: Can Megan do a squat? When something turned up that wasn't for you... We chat to Luke Metcalf before the last Warriors home game! Crazy things you get paid to do! Do we have a new listner? I'm in love with the Eiffel tower... Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono and Ben Instagram: THEHITSBREAKFASTSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This John Owen Ben podcast, hey that's us, brought to you by Hello Fresh, the experts and tastes that Kiwis love. You were saying as Rihanna Diamonds was playing right there, it reminded you of a pretty amazing, well on the surface it seems like an incredible trip you got to do, but it was also very full on at the same time. Yeah, when that song was released, seven countries, seven days on a 777 with Rihanna, like the world's media, and I was on there, which does sound amazing. Did Rihanna, like the world's media and I was on there, which does sound amazing Did Rihanna touch you? Yeah, at one point she poured me a glass of Ace of Spades champagne and I got a goodie bag that had diamonds in it

With diamonds in it? Yeah, like I had diamond Did she give you a diamond? Yeah, there was like a goodie bag that had all kinds of things like headphones, like a diamond necklace It was intense Jeez, that was a different time, wasn't it? It was! So you went to seven a different time, wasn't it? It was.

So you went to seven different places over seven nights to watch her perform. Sweden, Mexico, America, Berlin, and Germany. You name it, we went all around the world. That was a wild time for radio too, wasn't it? It was payola, where record companies would essentially just take management from radio stations. I remember my boss at The Rock getting picked up in limousines on a Monday morning, taken to the bloody strip club to listen to rock music. Different times. And then all of a sudden that music ends up on the radio station.

You like your time at the strip club, did you mate? Seems very mafioso, doesn't it? You like those lap dances? Yeah, we've got those on camera. You better play some bloody? Yeah, we've got those on camera. It's videos of you. You're all right. You better play some bloody Airborne, buddy. But it was a good time.

Like, nothing wrong with a bit of bribery, I say. Well, nowadays in radio, we arrive to work like we did this morning. And a whole lot of high drama going on of a different kind. This is what actually happened this morning. We walked into the radio studio. This alarming noise, alarming alarm was sounding and it felt like the radio station had about

16 minutes until it exploded. My computer said critical mass. I don't know. Critical mass? Everything, yeah. It was like critical mass warning. I'm like, what does this mean? Well, you and Matthew McLean, Matty McLean in the afternoon, you share that computer. Yes. Maybe you guys are running it too McLean in the afternoon, you share that computer.

Yes. Maybe you guys are running it too hard. Maybe you've been locking up on that computer. I get in trouble from Matty for not logging off at the end if I don't log off. Now I've got a daily reminder on my phone to log out for Matty. Because of the three extra minutes of inconvenience is him when he comes in. But anyway. Does it actually say log out for Matty?

On my reminder? Yeah. I do it every day. I'm passive aggressive. I know, but he's always like, I log out for him. But three minutes. That's all it takes. Three minutes, Matty.

But I do it every day. Log out for Matty McLean. I'll do this and log out. How hard is it to log out of a computer? Well, yeah. How hard is it to switch the user? I don't know. But anyway, I'm doing it every morning. I love the things that get you wound up. But anyway, I'm doing that every morning. I love the things

that get you wound up. It's always the most strange things. Good on you for doing that. It was a big bugbear for Matty McLean in the afternoon. It was. Come in here and he'd have to, I'll be locked. Anyway. Good on you for pressing one button and then convening it to yourself. Thank you. That's what I wanted. A bit of praise for logging out.

Anyway, we got Aaron from IT. He came and fixed it for you out. Anyway, we got Aaron from IT. He came and fixed it for you, though. He said the computer's very dramatic. It was one of those classic unplug it, plug it back in, away you go. Turn it off, turn it on again. Yeah, exactly. It actually never does you wrong.

People mock up the turn it on. Have you tried turning it off, turning it on again? It actually works a treat because this computer, I think my laptop's been running since 2011. Hasn't had a breather. You never turn them off. No. They're always working. And they're like, can I just, could you just give me a,

if you could take five minutes just to turn me off. It's not where the updates come through. I just want to do an update. You're like, not now, mate. Please. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. All right. So, Megan, yesterday something happened to you at the gymnasium. And you've got a glow. please the hits the Jono and Ben podcast alright so Megan yesterday

something happened to you at the gymnasium and you've got a glow you've got a smile ear to ear like a cheshire cat this is just me telling you that I went

to the gym but when this happens and I spoke to producer Grace about this like it really gives you a pep in your step

so I've been doing Pilates classes and it involves like the reform of a machine. Sometimes you've got to coordinate arms and everything. It's a lot. So the machines I sometimes see them on Instagram. Are they the sliding machine? They've got a carriage.

They're sliding and then they've got straps for your arms and legs. Gotcha. I know what you mean. Sometimes there's a circle thing. Sometimes there's a ball. Is that really hard? Some of those moves? Yeah. So you look at it and you're like, how hard can it be? They're riding on a carriage. But it's like they make you go slow sometimes and your arms and legs are shaking. They feel very sort of dungeon-y, don't they, those machines? Fifty shades of something.

Yeah, they do. You're kind of like strapped and locked in there, like one of those weird massage chairs on the infomercials that you see. It's a bit like that. But, you know, there's other people in the class and they're instructing it and you know everyone always looks so calm and collected and perfect and what they're doing yesterday not once but twice in the class the instructor said in front of everyone and she looked at me that's great form great form and she looked at me and I was like

did everyone hear that? there's nothing better in a gym class especially if you've been to one of those classes where there's honestly like 60 people so you got singled out

like a gold star what were you doing squats? what was going on? what was your form like? you're right actually show us your squat no it's just one squat

we'll see what the form's like just show us a squat pop a squat okay let's? Just show us a squat. Pop a squat. Okay, let's have a look. Pop a squat. Also, my legs are very sore. Oh, here we go. Is that a great form, Jono?

It is a fantastic form. It felt very weird. The weight, you can tell the weight's in the posterior too. You don't want to put that pressure on the knees. Good form. Great squatting. My legs are tracking over my toes. What is it?

Yeah. But twice, she gave me a shout out in front of everyone. And I was like, hey, yo, I'm good. But you know, you're paying her. There's an obligation for her. The gym is paying her. And technically all of us in the room are paying her. Yeah, but so she's got an obligation to give positive feedback, you know.

I wouldn't say it was scattered evenly throughout the room. Oh, right. I was definitely ahead of the class. Top of the class. I think so. So afterwards definitely ahead of the class. Top of the class. I think so. So afterwards, did this help you feel good for the rest of the day? The whole day, I was like, I nailed that. Did you feel like the burning eyes of the other attendees?

Yeah, but I didn't care. I was like, do better. Do better. Get better form. Follow me. If you want to see what to do, watch me. I've got it. I'm perfect.

There was probably a guy in there with two broken legs and a wheelchair, and they're like, good squats, buddy. If you're a gym instructor, you have to give good feedback, because you want people to keep coming back. Keep it up. That's it. Keep it going.

Well done. Well done. I'm pleased for you, Megan. That's great. Hey, next, something else that surprised you this week, something that turned up at your house, we've been banging on about in the last couple of days. Look, I just want to find who the rightful owner of this package is. that surprised you this week? Something that turned up at your house and we've been banging on about in the last couple of days? Look, I just want to find who the rightful owner of this package is.

Shout out to the prince who was trying to find Cinderella with the slipper. He was committed. You know, I'm starting to fade out of trying to find this person. But the prince follows through. And also, how unusual was her shoe size?

There's no one else in the whole kingdom. Right? I've always thought that. Everyone's got a foot that would fit a size. Find the first size eight and go, oh, you'll do, mate. Now, yeah, something surprising turned up in your letterbox there. Yeah, I got a package, a bubble wrap package, pretty nondescript. And it didn't say where it came from, but it did have a phone number and a name.

The name was Jackie. And I did text the phone number and say, hey, Jackie, I think I've got your phone case. The person texted back and said, no, wrong number. This isn't Jackie. Why are they ashamed to own that phone case? Because looking at it, it's vibrant, isn't it? It's got a panda cycling in the moonlight. A lot of stuff going on in the back of that phone.

It's too much phone case for me creatively. So maybe the person was a little embarrassed that they had ordered the phone case. Surely not. Surely not. But we're trying to get a hold of Jackie. So, Jackie, listen, you can come forward anonymously. Well, you're not so anonymous. We've been saying your name on the radio for the last four days.

But you can come forward and collect your phone case. I feel like Jackie would want that phone case. Yeah, well, she bought it. Yeah. She bought it. It's for her Samsung phone. What's protecting her Samsung now? Maybe Jackie had ordered something off the dark web

and it was meant to be disguised as a phone case. Well, that's why I opened it because I was like, it's a very light package. And it didn't have like from a store or anything on the back right? No, no. Just one of those white bubble wrap packages. No receipt inside or anything. That literally was only the case. There was no

like order sheet or anything. Maybe she'd ordered some kidneys from Taiwan. And we should get David Lomas onto it instead of missing pieces, missing cases. Oh, great, yeah. Got a cold case.

Can he solve the case of the phone case? Yeah, I like that. I don't know if he'd be quite as into it as we would be. He'd be like, really? Am I going to spend my time doing this now? He always flies around too, David Lomas, on the show. So he'd probably. Are they filming at the moment though?

He might have some downtime. He flew to China to go to the factory where it was made and stuff like that. He might have some downtime in between series. Yeah, you're right. The, you know, things that turn up at your house, which was quite, this is a funny story of a friend of ours. He was at, I think sadly his mother's funeral. And they were at their property after the proceedings

and they were waiting for the catering to turn up. And it'd been like an hour. And they phoned the catering company. They're like, no, no, we dropped it off. And he said, where? And they said, oh, this address, which wasn't their house. So he's like, okay, well, I'll go over to that house and just say, hey, sorry, that's my mother's funeral, and all's well that ends well.

Turns up, knock on the door. There's a guy with a sausage roll hanging out of his mouth like a cigar. So he opens the door. He opens the door, and he's got a club sandwich in one hand and a sausage roll hanging out of his mouth like a cigar. So he opens the door. He opens the door, and he's got a club sandwich in one hand and a sausage roll in his mouth in the other hand. And he's been tucking into the funeral platter that's turned up for, and he's like, oh, hey, that's my mum's funeral food. Obviously the guy was a bit devilish.

I don't feel like I can laugh. Yeah. I think he even said Like he's like Her funeral food Well she won't mind If it's missing Oh

Oh so he was like It was a bit of a joke At the time And he's like Well can I come in And get it Three quarters of it are gone When the whole family's

Tucking in They're like But mind you When the whole platter Of food turns up It's great I mean yeah You're not denying it

Yeah and how much Should they have Possibly gone through? You know, there's still a bit of it. But as soon as you've seen asparagus wrapped in a piece of bread, you're like, this is condolence food. This is commiseration food. The hits.

The Jono and Ben podcast. Doorstep. Megan's had a phone case turned up. We're trying to track down Jackie. If you know Jackie, you did order a phone case. Got a bicycling panda. Just ask any Jackie you know if she ordered a phone case that hasn't arrived. Very cute.

Very new panda. Pandas enjoyed cycling as well. But only in the moonlight, by the look of that. It looks like it's a moonlight situation. A lot going on in that phone case. We've got Scott with us on the phone. Well, good morning. How are you, Scotty?

Hey there, guys. How's it going? Yeah, good. You turned up at someone's house unannounced. Yep, sure did. Yeah, the mate, so we hadn't seen him much for the week and usually, you know, a few of us mates, we see each other every day. You know, social footy and a few other things and he just wasn't showing up.

And one of my other mates saw him on the Friday and he didn't say much and we were thinking there's something wrong with him, you know, what's going on? So I just thought I'd show up with some beers, something we do quite often on the Friday. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, I walked into his house and he was on his laptop and it was just after 5pm. So I just shut his laptop, thought, nah, what's going on? And it turns out he was in a job interview. You go, I've noticed you're a bit down lately, mate.

Yeah, it's because I've had no job and I was trying to, you know, maybe nail this interview. He had a job, but he was, yeah, I think he was just focused on that for the week, eh? And he was a bit nervous. He didn't want to tell the boys, so. So how does he get back from that after being disconnected by you? Yeah, he got the job.

Oh, he did. He got back on. That's good. And he's got a good friend. You could say it was celebratory beers, but we didn't know. Yeah, at the time. That's so good.

Thanks for your call, mate. No worries. Catherine, good morning. Good morning. Turned up at the doorstep. What was it? It was a nice package, delicious snacks and nice chutneys and dips and things like that. Thanking someone for their loyalty, I guess.

Yeah, right. Thank you. Thank you, Hamper. Had you been loyal to anyone at that stage or not? No, it was addressed to the previous tenants who lived in our home before we bought it. Right, okay. So now you're thinking, how loyal am I to those people? Exactly, yeah.

We thought, well, how would we ever get it to them? We had no idea where they went. So we decided to keep it ourselves. Okay. And you enjoyed those chutneys and those paper-thin wafer crackers, you know, that was chucking those things? Yes, we did, to a point. But then the tenant turned up a couple of days after the package came,

asking if we had received the package. Which we were not expecting. As you're eating like a gherkin. No, what do you do? Give half of it back? We did, but we got stuck into it. I'm sorry. Yeah, exactly.

My husband thought quickly on his feet and was like, oh, no, mate, we sent it back. Good save. So what did you do with the stolen goods? Well, for some reason we panicked, like thinking this guy was trouble or something, possibly, and got rid of the evidence. So in case he came back and asked again.

It's not like a drug picker. Wait, what do you mean got rid of it? Did you just chuck it out? Get rid of the chutney. Get rid of the chutney. The penne. Put the penne on the bed. Flush the penne.

We took the box because we still had the box that came in and everything. So we thought we don't want to just put it in our rubbish bin because what if he comes back and looks through the package? Looks through the package. This chutney is just for the package. It's so good. Stole it. So the taste of pickle, he had the taste of guilt in the end. That's right.

Yeah, so we did it. I don't know why we felt like we needed to hide it or be on the run for a moment, but that's what it felt like. We were panicking for some reason. Are you calling us now for witness protection or something like that? Fugitives. Still on the run.

That's the most badass you'll ever sound right there. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. And you said something which has alarmed both Megan and me. You're not going shopping with your daughter ever again. Well, no, I probably will. To be honest, I probably will. That's clickbait.

You're living in hyperboles. I've clickbaited you. But I have. For the first time, you know, a couple of days ago, I went shopping with my daughter. I've done it many times where I went shopping

to look for something for myself. So normally in the past when you go shopping with your kids, you're normally buying something for them. You know, like, oh, they need new shoes for school, whatever it is. Kids are always needing stuff.

They're always growing too. Come on, I hardly ever go shopping for myself now. It's so rude. You do online. Are you talking about physically going into shops? What time is it? Is my husband listening? Yeah, your husband doesn't know

about any of the online shopping you're doing. But a couple of days ago, I was like, I need to get a new pair of jeans. You know, I got to a stage where, you know, I want a black pair of jeans

and my old ones weren't in a good condition. I was like, I need to go get them. So that was my mission to go to the shops to get jeans. And my daughter,

Sienna, was coming along. She was collateral for the trip, but I was like, okay, she can come along with me for a change. And I've never experienced this before, but I got into a bit of an argument with her.

She's like, don't get skinny jeans. And I'm like, what's wrong with the jeans that I've got? She's like, Dad, no longer cool. Gen Z's don't like skinny jeans. This is the thing. We've gone from one extreme to the other, I notice, out there in the market, where you've gone from jeans that look like compression tights to jeans that look like you're wearing two parachutes on your legs.

And this is the thing. She's like, your jeans are too skinny. It's not cool anymore. You need to get a bigger pair of jeans. So I go into the store. I get the ones that I want. I want to try these on. She's like, no, try these ones on.

I'm trying them on. I look like MC Hammer from the 90s. They are big now. Are they bigger than we remember when they first were big? I put them on. I'm like, I could wear these, but I just feel like I'm just a guy trying to be cool down with the kids. And she's like, that's it. Those are the jeans to get. I'm like, oh, I can't do this. So did you do it? No, so we sort of went back and forth. I put on the skinny jeans. She's like, too skinny. Then I'd get a pair that were slightly less baggy than the pair that she wanted.

And she's like, that's fine. Still like the baggy pair, but go with those. I'm like, nope, too baggy. So I'd go again skinny. You're trying to dial back the bagginess. I had six different pairs of jeans. We met somewhere in the middle of it. As a millennial that's been into the skinny jeans for so long,

it's a real, it's a thing to get your head around. Yeah. Even like, you're not allowed to wear ankle socks. So we're so used to wearing like socks that don't show. And now that's, you know, Gen Z's have to wear the pulled up socks. I know. The thing is, and I said this to my daughter, in my jean career, I've had skinny jeans, I've had flared jeans, I've had baggy jeans, you know.

Ripped jeans. Ripped jeans. And then eventually they'll come back in fashion. I haven't gone to those jeans that are too short for your legs, you know. They run above your ankles. And then if they were long, you rolled them haven't gone to those jeans that are too short for your legs. You know, they run above your ankles. And then if they were long, you rolled them up to make them look like they were too short. Yeah. Because the jeans are really, who leaves the jean fashion?

Why has it changed so much? The other thing too is when, if you wear a baggy pair of jeans now, you're going to look like a semi-professional skateboarder who probably should have given up on his dream about 15 years ago and got a sensible job. That's what it kind of felt like. We were like, oh, is he still skating down the skate park? I said to my daughter, I said, this kind of looks sad. I kind of feel sad.

I do. It wasn't my kids saying it, but I went in and I tried some pants on a couple of years ago. And you ask the shop assistant for some advice. And generally nine times out of ten, everything looks fantastic. Swipe your bloody card mate she was even like oh I just don't think age appropriate

age appropriate don't think that age appropriate she did not say that she was right though she was actually like she did me a huge favour the hits

the Jono and Ben podcast the best toasted sandwich was voted in Okeri Falls yeah just about 20 minutes out of Rotorua and we phoned them yesterday. We can shout you a sandwich, so if you saw a pickup, you just let us know, and we'll

have it ready. Wow, okay. Location, can we tell us where is the name of your cafe? Where is it? Oh, Okere Falls Store, about 20 minutes outside of Rotorua. Okay, so that was yesterday. Yeah. Ben, you demanded that the sandwich made it to the studio within 24 hours.

You needed someone to pick it up for you. It feels like a demand. It feels like one of those stories that's going to be living on. It was like, do you know what he made someone do? And it was like, hey, Megan, we talked about it. We said we'd love to try it. We put the call out. We're like, if anyone's traveling up the country, can they pick it up? It was just like, it. We said we'd love to try it. We put the call out. We're like, if anyone's traveling up the country, can they pick it up?

It was just like, if you can, we'd love to try it. It was really innocent. Publicly, it was if you can. Behind the scenes, ugly. Ugly. So the show finished. No one could pick it up. Well, you hadn't heard from anyone.

Ben started. He picked up a young intern by her throat, held her against the wall, and said, you will drive. If you've wondered who the diva on the show is. A five hour round trip to pick up my toasted sandwich. When you return, I won't be here to eat the toasted sandwich.

Put it in the fridge. Don't bite it. Leave it all for me. And while you're there, tattoo the name of the radio station on your back. Now this is what he said. Now to poor Renee who, just starting out her radio career. You know, at some point this is going to be on a website somewhere. She'll remember this.

This will be a story she tells. No, I wasn't demanding anyone. This is Renee. Let's get Renee on the phone. Okay. Renee, welcome. Firstly, apologies on behalf of the show for bullying you and driving to Rotorua and back.

You know, I forgive you. It's okay. No hard feelings. I'm sorry that Ben held you up by the throat. I didn't hold anyone up by the throat. No, I was very surprised. Even the sandwich was guilty being part of this campaign. I was surprised that you said you'd do this.

It was awesome you did it. At what point did you regret doing it? You know, I don't regret doing it. It was a lot a little fun always down for a roadie i had to text my partner before i left though because we're going for dinner with my parents and i was like hey by the way we're gonna be late for dinner what are you doing darling that must be very important oh yeah the guy from the radio he picking him up a toasted sandwich from Roast.

Couldn't he make one up? No, no. He wants it once specifically. You need to call your parents and apologize. It's the last time we'll see your grandmother. It's okay. He needed the toasted sandwich, Mum. It's right. It'll put me up the career ladder.

He said he'll do things for my career. I didn't say that. I'm so sorry. Have a good laugh, guys. It's fine. How late for dinner were you? and I was for six and we got there

at 7.15 so only an hour and 15 minutes that's like you want to be into the mains by then terrible

you know first it's a novelty toasted sandwich next you're hosting a pee diddy party mate oh boy oh jeez

this is how it starts I'm sorry Renee gateway behavior okay Renee well thank you so much I think we have the toasted sandwich wait one more question for Renee Oh, whatever, mate. Oh, jeez. This is how it starts. I'm sorry, Renee. Gateway behavior. Okay, Renee. Well, thank you so much. I think we have the toasted sandwich. Wait, one more question for Renee. Enjoy it.

Yes? Did you try the toasty? The staff are absolutely gorgeous. As soon as I arrived there, they greeted me with a coffee and my own toasty. Oh, I'm kidding, Paul. That's amazing. And what's your verdict? What do you mean?

It's amazing. I'm a massive fan of cheese, and they've got, like, three different types on there. Three cheeses. That's amazing. And what's your verdict? What do you mean? It's amazing. I'm a massive fan of cheese, and they've got like three different types on there. Three cheeses. Enjoy, guys. I love it how Megan goes, what's your verdict? And Ben's on the defense. I'm out of behavior. What do you mean?

I meant about the toasted sandwich, not about you. I get that now. I thought you were accusing me of something. No. I just said verdict, and I was like, oh, God. He's very jumpy at the moment. It's a cor a court case. All right, so we're going to try it right now.

We'll put it on our social media. Please apologise to your whanau too, Renee. Don't worry because Ben's going to call them. I'm so sorry about that. Now he's listening. Now when upper management call us into a meeting and say, do you think this is a giant waste of company time and resource, what do you want us to reply with?

Definitely not. I would do it again. Oh, Renee, you're awesome. Thank you so much for doing that. We'll try the sandwich. No matter how hard we try, she's not going to throw you under the bus. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Friday, which is going to be the last game at home for Sean Johnson, Warriors legend.

A very emotional one tonight. If you want to go along, 4-4-8-7. We've got a double pass to the Warriors. But joining us is Sean Johnson's halves partner for this weekend's game, Luke Metcalf. Good morning, buddy. How are you? Hey, mate. How are you? Not too bad. Nice to have you on the show. Thanks for having me.

How's things been? Because obviously, you know, it must be tough being a player when you want to play and you've been injured and then come back. It must be such a great feeling. Yeah, it's awesome. Obviously, I was out, I think, it must be tough being a player when you want to play and you've been injured and then come back. It must be such a great feeling. Yeah, it's awesome. Obviously, I was out, I think, for about four months there. But, yeah, I'm just grateful that I'm able to catch the back end of the season and get, I think, hopefully three or four games in.

And, yeah, obviously frustrating it hasn't gone the way we wanted it to this year. But, yeah, I'm just grateful on a personal note to be back. Can you be honest, how many of the team came to see you in hospital when you had your surgery? I can't lie, not as many as I wish, as I hope. But actually, there was one person I'll give a shout out, Wade Egan actually came. I think he felt a little bit bad because he's the one that passed me the ball.

Oh, right. I think he felt a little bit bad. So, no, he came, brought me some food, sat next to my bed for a couple of hours. Is it the missile rod that you got put in your leg? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I've got a rod put in there, a couple of screws at the top and the bottom of my leg. Yeah, it feels fine now. So when you go through like a metal detector at the airport, does it sort of beep and stuff or what happens?

Well, I thought so. I thought it would. But I had my first airport trip on the weekend going to Sydney, and I was half expecting that to happen, but it didn't happen. I walked straight through. Oh, damn it. I have always wanted to know this. When most of us get injured, there's not footage of it,

but when you get injured, you can see the moment of injury if you want to go back and watch it. Is that something you did? Yeah, I've watched it heaps of times, eh? I don't know why. I'm not really too squirmish to that sort of stuff. Yeah, I've watched that heaps of times, eh? Yeah, I don't know why. I'm not really too squirmish to that sort of stuff. Yeah, but no, yeah, I've watched it back a fair few times, and I still don't know right now how that happened just from that collision,

but I suppose it's because I'm a skinny littleish man and boy. That's probably my business factor. Obviously, it's a big game. It's not the season you guys all wanted, you know, and we wanted as fans, but, you know, you've seen some close games that haven't quite gone the Warriors' way. But it's a big occasion Friday night, Sean Johnson's last home game. Sean Johnson Stadium is going to be renamed. It's going to be so weird to not have Sean Johnson playing for the Warriors,

and that's from a fan's point of view. But what about for you guys on the team? Yeah, yeah, obviously this week's huge. I'm actually standing in the stadium now, and it's actually crazy. Like, I'm just picturing, like, I think it's going to be, it's going to have a similar atmosphere to that sort of semi-final game last year. I think when we played Newcastle

and just the whole 80 minutes, the stadium was just buzzing. So I can imagine it's going to have a similar atmosphere to that. And, yeah, I just can't wait for him. I hope he'll go out there and put out a really good performance for him because he deserves it. If there's anything he deserves, it's us going out and putting on a mad performance and getting the win for him. But yeah, I always tell him he was my favourite player

when I was younger. So to be able to go out there and play with him this week in his last home game, yeah, it's going to be awesome. And I can't wait. How is he feeling in the lead up to this weekend? I think he's okay. He's my roomie, so I was actually asking him over the weekend and he said he would probably be pretty emotional. But when he comes out, like he said, he doesn't know what's going roomie, so I was actually asking him over the weekend, and he said he would probably be pretty emotional,

but when he comes out, like he said, he doesn't know what's going to happen, whether he's going to tear up or whether he's going to be fine, or after the game, the club's probably going to put on a thing for him and do something nice. Now, look, we like to ask the players like yourself that we want to keep around in New Zealand because you're from Australia. Is there anything we can do to, you know, sweeten the deal for New Zealand going forward? Because we want you to stay we can do to, you know, sweeten the deal for New Zealand going forward?

Because we want you to stay around. Can we, you know, put your bins out? Ben will do anything. Yeah, mow your lawns. I mean, what sort of things do we need to do just to keep you in New Zealand? If you could hook me up with, like, a Lamborghini Aventador or something like that.

Okay, all right. See what I can do. I don't know. I mean, we've gone from mowing lawns to hooking up with a Lambo, but all right. We'll see what we can do. Shit, if I could get one of we've gone from mowing lawns to hooking up with a lambo, but all right, we'll see what I can do. Shit, if I could get one of those,

it'd probably go me first, then you second. You said if there was anything you could do. I mean, I love Luke Metcalf. That's my commitment to keep me in New Zealand. I'll see what I can do.

I'll send some emails. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. I was heartbroken for T-Pain because he was saying he was at the peak of his auto-tune career and he was

featuring on all these songs like that Kanye one there and he was doing his thing and he was on a plane and he was flying over America T-Plane? Was it a T-Plane? I hope his private jet's called the T-Plane It's got to be right

Sorry, I interrupted that with that bad pun He was flying commercial in this instance And Usher Was a few rows ahead T-Pain was sleeping and halfway through the flight Usher woke him up And he said You have ruined music

And T-Pain said From that moment forward He's like, I don't actually blame Usher Because he was looking back at it Because T-Pain can actually sing Beautiful voice And he was like, I get't actually blame Usher Because he was looking back at it Because T-Pain can actually sing Yeah, he's an amazing singer Beautiful voice And he was like, I get it, it was a gimmick

He's like, I'm not angry at Usher for it But that actually spiralled him into a whirlwind of depression Is that why he stopped doing music? That's why he stopped doing music Usher? That's not nice So now T-Pain is making a whole lot of money though A crazy amount of cash Now listen to this

So he doesn't I think he still dabbles in singing But this is what his job is now And how much he earns per hour In order to get me out of this house You gotta I got to be making more Than I'm making playing video games

Down the hallway You know what I mean? Like when you're making 50, 60 grand an hour Playing video games in your drawers It's kind of hard to get me To go out in the country You said 50, 60 grand an hour.

This is what I've... That gaming world is like that? I'm on the low tier. This dude's making millions a month. 50 or $60,000 an hour playing video games. Now, this is not great news for any parents driving with their kids right now that are playing a lot of video games.

Those video games will lead you nowhere. It's like 50, 60 grand an hour. He's leading the life of a stoned university student. Wow. And paid 60 grand an hour. Sorry, let me pick that up. Is it on that Twitch? I think that Twitch platform.

What is it? I've heard of Twitch. I've mentioned it. Is it just gaming, live streaming? It's live streaming, yeah. But you don't have to just do gaming. it's like live streaming a lot of things just anything well would they live i love clearing emails could i don't know what the audience would be like he's put that in the trash oh he's replied to that one oh he's put in the trash

oh he's hit reply all by accident always got some folders going on on the sideline yeah reply always oh he's panicking you should do a live you should do a live stream of Ben Boyce getting through his to do list for the day hey I've got to go

pick up some dry cleaning oh no one wants to watch me do you know what some people would watch it I'd watch it is he going to make the you know he's got 28 items

he's packed in too much into his to do list now he's getting a little stressed about stuff shut up kids I've got the I know I've got to go take the dog to the vet He's packed in too much into his to-do list. Now he's getting a little stressed about stuff. Shut up, kids. I've got to go take the dog to the vet for his vaccinations.

Yeah, no. No one wants to watch that. What is the wildest amount of money you've earned? What's the craziest thing you've done to earn money? Well, nothing like that. I mean, now and again we do something crazy for our work that, you know, that I guess is technically we technically getting paid to do. Yeah, our job is pretty weird on a day-to-day anyway. Doesn't your friend film OnlyFans?

Yeah, that's the farting OnlyFans. Oh, that's right. She earns money from that, doesn't she? Yeah, yeah. A decent amount too. Like a wage? Crazy. Probably not a wage just yet.

But it's heading that way. Some pocket money, yeah. Yeah, good pocket money. So she puts the phone down her trousers and then the rest happens. Nature takes its course and people watch that and pay for it. And people ask for it in a jar and all kinds of things. Oh my goodness.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. It blew someone's mind when we spoke to Cyril Because they had heard Stumbling In And they were like Oh yeah Female singer

And then suddenly You hear this Aussie Yeah Yobbo Aussie yobbo That's Cyril The whole time I thought it was

The singer on that song He's the DJ That put together the remix Yeah But he's a true gentleman He's awesome Isn't he Yeah lovely guy

We were just talking about What you got paid for, what we wouldn't believe you got paid for, like remixing an old song from Stumbling In. Yeah. That's what he's doing. 0800, that's his telephone number. We said we had someone from a medical trial.

We demanded someone who put their body on the line in the name of science and medicine. And Brendan, welcome. Hey, guys. How's it going? You all right after these medical trials, mate? You with us? Yeah, still alive.

No long-lasting effects. No. So talk us through it. Do you know what the drug was you were trialing? I can't actually remember. It was a while back. But it was one where we went in and we stayed a night before they dosed us. And we woke up the next morning ready for dosing.

And we were told that there was a problem with the drug and they wouldn't be proceeding with the trial. And the first thing we all thought of wasn't so much about we skipped death there, but we were worried about if we were actually going to get paid. Yep, that's the first thing you need to worry about. And we did. We got paid. I think it was about just under $11,000. What? And it was one night, one night,

and we didn't have to do anything, basically. You got paid $11,000 for a sleepover? Pretty much, yeah. A sleepover. It kind of feels a little late in the piece for them to find something wrong with the drug. When you've got all these people, they're about to chuck it inside your body. It's like when you get on a plane and there's an engineer fault.

You're like, whoo, whoo, lucky. Good Lord. Impressive, Brendan. There we go. Well, listen, if someone said, hey, there's a 50-50 chance you might grow a tail if you take this stuff for a week, what's the price you're putting on that? If I cut the tail off, does it grow back? Yeah, that's a 50-50 chance you might grow a tail if you take this stuff for a week. What's the price you're putting on that? If I cut the tail off, does it grow back? Yeah, that's a good question. It's with you. It's with you

for life. $20,000. Potential of growing a tail. Not a guarantee. I could tuck it in. Yeah. Tuck it in. Thanks for your call, Brendan. Shari, welcome. Hi. Beautiful to have you on the show this morning, Shari. We won't believe you got paid for what?

I got paid $2,500 for cutting my hair off. Wow. Now, can I just stop the broadcast here? Okay? Let's not lead into the obvious conversation. Let's just talk to Shari about her making money off her hair experience. I was just going to ask if you would pay $2,500 for Shari's hair. Don't chuck it my way.

Don't chuck it my way. Ask me that question first. Yeah, I would. And now, Jono, now you can have that question. It's fair we've asked everyone now. Shari, that is an amazing amount of money. And so that is like shaving your head? No, I had it cut off in ponytails,

so I still had like a pixie haircut with like a sweeping fringe. Yeah, it was great. What was the length of the hair that you sold, do you reckon? It was touching my butt, so it was pretty long. Long hair. Would you do it again? Yeah, I would probably, but probably for more money because, you know, that was 16 years ago.

I'd probably want a bit more now. Yeah, inflation, cost of living, you know, up your prices. Actually, a lot of the times they're, you know, up your prices. And they actually, a lot of the times, they're not just for bald radio hosts, these wigs, but they're for people who are going through chemo treatment as well, so they're put to good use. And did your hair, did it have to be virgin hair? Like not dyed?

Yeah, my hair hadn't been dyed or anything. Wow, that was that long. The hair of a virgin. Well, that's me, huh? It just means not dyed, Jono. I shall only. The hair of a virgin. Well, that's me, huh? It just means not dyed, Jono. I shall only don the hair of a virgin. I can smell sex in this hair. Oh, God.

All right. The cheese has slipped off the cracker right now. Well, thanks so much, Nicole. We appreciate it. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Each week on the show, thanks to our wonderful friends at Dilma who have had the catchphrase, do try it, for many years when it comes to tea. They've got hot and cold tea.

They're trying to make the world a better tea. Do try it. We've jumped on board with the catchphrase, and we're getting people to try our radio show that maybe haven't tried it before. And then at the end of the week, they get a quiz, and they could win $500 for themselves and $500 for the person that nominates them. Yeah, so Andrea had nominated her husband, Natama, who listens to the devil's streaming platform, Spotify.

Created by Satan himself, I think. I think so, yeah. And Natama, we called him day two. This is what he had to say after 24 hours of the show. You're very funny. You actually got a lot of good sense of humour. I never didn't know that you had. Oh, that's good.

That's a positive. That phone cover you were talking about this morning. What's her name? Jackie? Has she rung up yet or not? He's been listening. You've been listening. You have been listening.

Now, look. That was on Tuesday. Has he faded out? Because some cash is up for grabs. Now we are going through to Ngā Tama. Your father. Hello. Hello.

Hello, is that Natama? Yes, it is I. Is that the listener we've been slowly wearing down and bullying into the show? You've got a chance now to win $500 for you and $500 for your wife,

Andrew, as well, by answering a couple of questions based on the show, our show over the week. Yeah, we spoke to you on day two, and to be honest, you're a pretty easy egg to crack. You were very favourable about the comments. But then I went away after that programme and was like, is he just saying favourable comments because we're dangling

a cash carrot at the end of the week? Yes, I think so. I would too. Yeah, you're right. I mean, I'm going to say anything if there's cash involved Even if Kim Jong-un is like Hey, can you say some favourable stuff about communism I'll be like, yeah, I'll get that out there How much you got there?

No, honestly, you guys are really funny I've listened to you guys all this week At 8.45, no ads Oh, he's got the no ads till the morning tea, but he's got it all. Now, here's where the pressure comes on, Nartama, because you were nominated by your wife, Andrea. We have a series of questions relating to events that have taken place on the program over the last five days.

Now, if you answer all of these, you're going to get the $1,000, and you have one opportunity to phone a friend. I'm gathering your friend would be Andrea to help you out. Go on then. Okay, so let's see how you go without her. And if you need her, we can give her a call, okay? Okay. Okay, whose name was on the phone case that turned up at Megan's house?

Oh, that's Jackie. We talked about that. Don't ask me. Low-hanging fruit. I know about that one. So let's try a bit harder. Okay, has anyone won $1,000 on our game, the Alpha Quiz, this week? Yeah, I just listened to it.

What's the answer? Pip and Poppy. Pip, yes. Is it Pip? Yep, we had a winner. Well done. Okay, what did we get picked up from Rotorua and brought all the way to the studio to eat? Sandwich.

Yeah, it was this. Sandwich. Okay. He is on fire. How many studio to eat? Sandwich. Yeah, it was this sandwich. Okay. He is on fire. How many more to go? Two to go. Okay. What was the learning song they're changing in schools in America

that I was upset about, Megan was okay with? Oh, that's the alphabet. You're killing it. I know that one. I know that one. Okay. And finally, name one guest that we've had on the show this week. Oh, my favorite guest.

Well, just... Oh, yes, we had a league player. What team does he play for? The Warriors. There we go. Luke Metcalf. Luke Metcalf as well. Well done.

You didn't even need to phone a friend. You've won five... I know. I know. I listened to you. You're really funny. Well, will we see you Monday, or are you going back to your friend's Spotify? Well, I'll put it this way.

I need three hours in the morning to listen to you guys. And you're funny. Oh, well, great. Then you can go back to, well, no, I'm not going to say then go back to Spotify. The boss will be not happy about that. Then you can enjoy the no ads till morning tea. That's right, John. Then you can enjoy the daytime show and then the afternoon show. Good company person, John Lewis. One thing I have to happy about that. Then you can enjoy the no ads to morning tea. That's right, John. Then you can enjoy the daytime show

and then the afternoon show. Good company person, John Ellis. One thing I have to mention though, one thing I have to mention, you guys got a really good spread of audience. Oh yeah, a wide catchment.

Very wide range. What do we have? Plethora? A plethora. Yeah, we do have a plethora. Yeah, we do. We have a lot. We'll take anyone. Even if they don't have ears to listen, we do have a plethora. Yeah. Yeah, we do. We have a lot. We'll take anyone.

Even if they don't have ears to listen, we'll take them. Hey, well done, Natama. You've got $1,000 for you and Andrea. Thanks to Dilma Rati. Thanks so much for taking part this week. It's been really fun chatting to you throughout the week. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. This cup kicked off overnight, New Zealand time.

We won our first race, which is good. Who were we playing? Playing, I think, Luna Rosa. I think we were playing. Racing. Racing, yeah. The Italian team. They had a splashdown.

Is that what it's called? What does that mean? I don't know. They had a splashdown. Sounds like a dance-off. I don't think it was fun for me. It's time for a splashdown. You want a splashdown?

Yeah, so it looks like New Zealand, even though we are the challenger, you know, we are the holder of the America's Cup, we are getting involved in some of these early races, and then I think we skip through to some other rounds later. Oh, because we get to kind of make the rules, don't we? Yeah, it's great. It's great. It's like when someone comes over and plays a board game at your house.

You're like, no, no, no, that's not how we play it here. We can't buy houses on the first round. You're like, what? Who said that? Our house, our rules. Yeah, no. What was I going to say. We spoke to Dave, the chief commander of the yacht squadron.

The what? The yacht squadron. Squadron's a tough one to get your lips around. He said that many of the teams, Megan, you'll find this interesting, have Formula One engineers designing the boats. Oh, engineers. No offence, but I thought you were going to say drivers. I'm over here busy. They're still hot too. The engineers. Yeah. No offence, but I thought you were going to say drivers.

I'm over there busy. They're still hot too. The engineers are hot. Are they? Yeah, and smarter. Yeah, exactly. Some would say. Right, now I got lost. I just watched the splashdown.

Do you want to know what a splashdown is? Yeah, may as well. You know how when they fly really high in the water and then something happens and it just like stops and like gets caught in the water. Oh. It makes a big splash.

It stops still. Yeah, and then it carries on. So it's not really that bad. Crazy. The guy was saying the boats are faster, like almost double the amount faster than the last America's Cup. Wow. What?

Formula One, baby. Formula One on the water, they're calling it, aren't they? Yeah. So good luck to Team New Zealand and the America's Cup. Instagram fed me a wonderful video yesterday. And you know there was a documentary a few years ago about a lady and she married the Eiffel Tower.

That's right. Do you remember that? Have a listen to her. She sounded like you listen to her and you're like what crazy buddy. Yeah.

But she sounded like she was genuinely in love with the Eiffel Tower. The first year we had nobody interfere because nobody knew I got married to the Eiffel Tower. And that's where I stepped in it.

You know, I decided to come out and tell my story. And media just looked at my relationship as something sexual, something as inappropriate. Yeah, so she was banned from the Eiffel Tower by Eiffel Tower management. Yeah, I can see from the management's point of view, like, it's not great branding for the Eiffel Tower if you're bloody gyrating up against it and stuff. Was she not concerned that the Eiffel Tower had other lovers? Well, yeah, people were riding that thing all day. You'd have to be pretty open-minded, I imagine.

The video was in her, and she's probably like, thanks, Instagram. This was seven years ago. But then it was also a medley of other people who have married stuff. Right. And you think this is odd and, you know, the majority might frown upon it and look down and society might judge. But you look back to internet dating when that first started. Remember?

We're like, what bloody virgin nerds are doing internet dating? And now it's more common than. Oh, yeah. It's the way to do it, right? So you could be marrying robots. I reckon we'd be marrying robots in seven years. Might be right. I'm going to say it now.

I don't know about seven. Who knows? I don't know. He's laying the groundwork. Seven years. Seven years. When Jen's had enough, she's like, where's that robot? Take the robot.

Yeah. But these are people who have married other stuff, too. There was Erica, who married the Eiffel Tower. A lady called Pascale Selleck married her own duvet. Okay. It's not a bad thing to marry. Yeah. I don't love my bed.

Well, you go to bed every night with the duvet. You're like, oh my God, I've been waiting for you all day. That's the thing with the Eiffel Tower, it's probably harder to get in. You're not taking the Eiffel Tower home. You've got to go, you know, some things like that. Yeah, true. A lady called Amy Wolfe married a roller coaster. Okay.

People riding her husband all day. Yeah. Again, no issues with it. A dude married a hamburger. Did that end well? Well, it's not going to last long, you wouldn't imagine. Yeah. A type of hamburger or a specific one?

It just looked like a big, juicy sort of cheeseburger. Okay. And a lady called Carol Santa inaly married a train station i always think did the train station want to get married to this person you know because normally in a marriage situation yeah well yeah you know they want to say yes yeah but in this case you're right it's all about consent whatever so i want to marry that train station well you can go to the train station i don't know what countries are letting people marry hamburgers and train stations how does the ceremony go?

Are they there? Are people seeing it? Is it a wacky radio thing in Italy? Things like that? Yeah, probably. What would you marry? Would you lock in your bed? Oh, my bed would be up there, I'd say.

Or a pair of my shoes. All right. Well, think about that. I'll have a think about that as well. I'm under the haze. You haven't put any thought into it? Well, I have. But at 4.47 in this chat, I'm like, I need to wrap things up.

He's a professional. And we'll get to those calls and texts. Do you want to know what people could marry something? An inanimate object. What would it be? What is your favorite object that you would love to... No judgment. No, no judgment at all.

A little bit of judgment. We'll speak of it again. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Playing in Vienna at the moment. And just a couple of weeks ago, the Taylor Swift concert got stopped in Vienna. They didn't get to play it because an alleged terrorist threat was very scary. So Chris Martin acknowledged that in concert yesterday and played a love story from Taylor Swift for all the Swifties out there as well.

So, yeah, nice thing to do. He seems like a lovely gentleman, doesn't he? He does, doesn't he? Yeah. Chris, very quaint British gentleman, Chris Martin. Didn't he turn up at your old radio station? He just walked up there? Yeah.

When he was here? Did he? At the edge, yeah. Was I there at the time? He's very unassuming. Maybe he turned up and you're like, who's the new accountant? Yeah. Hey, man.

Yeah, I think he rang the station. The radio number. He phoned the 0800 number. And he's like, hey, I'm going to come up for an interview. And they're like, okay. Like thinking, oh, this is some sort of joke And apparently he walked Through like Auckland

Walked for like 20 minutes Up a hill To walk to the station Just by himself Did an interview What? By himself? And they let him in

They let him in Bad security You're right Again it's probably just like I'll make you here To fix the computers Or something He does look like

IT guys He does Just before you go mate I'm having some problems with the mouse pad. And he would sort it out too. He probably would too. He'd be too polite not to. Oh, 800 of the hits.

This is what we're doing this morning. If you could marry any object, an inanimate object in your life, what would it be? Just rattle through a list of people. There's the lady who married the Eiffel Tower. There's a big documentary on her. And then she was like, I regret going public. And I'm like, I regret going public. And I'm like, you probably could have kept it to yourself, to be honest.

You didn't have to do an hour and a half long documentary. And I don't think they're still together now, mainly for the fact that Eiffel Tower management are like, babe, keep your distance. Then there's people who's married hamburgers, train stations, roller coasters. Do you have to get a divorce from the Eiffel Tower? Well, maybe you do. But I'm like, who's signing this document? Like what?

I don't know. Official is going, this is. It doesn't seem like you'd be officially married, but maybe it is. Maybe overseas. There's some wild rules. International waters. You can do anything out there. Now, Ben, you've been teasing us 15 minutes.

No, I'm not teasing. I was just trying to think of what I'd marry. You guys, while the song was playing, you were like a laptop. And I was like, oh, that would be better than what I was thinking. Chewing gum. Oh, chewing gum. Yeah, well, that would be good. Something I do carry around in my pocket all the time,

which is chewing gum, but not chewing gum. I'd take it out of my pocket. Hair bleach. He's blonde at the moment. Blondes have more fun, he says. Your TV career Well that's him being divorced That's for sure

I'm going to say Your fun co-pop collection Oh well no Good one Hand sanitiser I was going to say Hand sanitiser I was just thinking

I carry it around Everywhere next to my groin Comes with me everywhere No matter where I'm going You know Seen your darkest parts And then if I don't You know I think it came from The COVID And then if I don't, you know,

I think it came from the COVID days. If I don't actually have it in my pocket, not that I use it all the time now, to be honest, I still go, oh, I haven't got it with me. So, you know, I probably have a love. Never leave home without it. Deep love for hand sanitizer. It spends more time with you than your wife.

Yeah, it does. Hand sanitizer. Closer to your bits more often. James, good morning. How are you? Good morning. Lovely to have you on. It's a bit of an out-the often James, good morning, how are you? Good morning Lovely to have you on It's a bit of an out the gate topic this morning

but inanimate objects you would marry, James? My PS5 Oh, your PS5, that's a good one Didn't even have to think about it, straight in there Are you in a human to human relationship at the moment? Well, I probably play on my PS5 more than I spend time with my wife, actually. I should say that, but yeah. Is she okay with it?

She's quite happy with this relationship? Well, she has her own PS5 as well. Oh! You've got two! Amazing. So you don't do two-player. You don't do two-player. I see.

Two-player. You do separate PS5s. Yes, and we game share together, so yeah. In particular, what is it about the PS5? It's stress relief. It's something that's calmed me down after a long day of work. I'm going through some stuff

right now and it's calming me down and keeps me cool here. That's good to hear that you've found something like that. It's a cool thing to have too. That's awesome. We're going to send you out some help each so you have yourself a wonderful weekend. You too, guys.

Thanks, mate. I think I'd go with my cell phone. Oh, yeah. Cell phone just because it knows my deepest, darkest secrets. You want to keep your cell phone on side, don't you? You do. And then you don't. If I get a new cell phone, is it cheating on that cell phone?

Yeah. But it knows everything and it could unload on me at any point. So just keep the phone happy. Happy wife. Happy. cell phone. But it knows everything and it could unload on me at any point. So just keep the phone happy. Happy wife, happy... Happy phone, happy... Happy life.