Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Is this bad parenting?!

Episode Date: May 23, 2024

ON THE SHOW TODAY Jono held up a fire engine! Old school reality TV This celebrity loves NZ! Social media cooking  Ben digs himself into a hole... Guest who from this week news! Dads get credit where it's not due We make fun of Auckland through music A love challenge for the boys Check us out! Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono and Ben Instagram: TheHitsBreakfastSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Thanks to Challenge, putting the service back into service stations. Megan, you were just telling me while Morgan Wallen was playing that it's not going to get very warm in a lot of places. Some places just getting to single digits today. Bit of a polar blast going around the country. Winter officially starts next week. A lot of Kiwis dreaming about holidays at this time of year. Queenstown seems to be the most searched location domestically in New Zealand and the Gold Coast in Australia for international, for Kiwis looking on Booking.com I'm reading this morning.

Well you stay in New Zealand and embrace winter and go to Queenstown. Yeah, true. Or you cross the ditch and go to Goldie. It's just three hours away and the weather's always a lot. I just can't get my head around that. You go three hours down the country, you know, it's often about the same temperature. Antarctic temperatures. Had a nightmare yesterday driving home.

It was very busy and gridlocked traffic. And I found myself in one of the most loneliest positions any motorist could find themselves stuck in the middle of the intersection. Oh, yeah. You just feel the eyes of the other four corners of the intersection just waiting for the lights to turn red so they can then honk. Drive up right beside you. And I'm like, yeah, I know. I can't do anything. There's nothing I can do.

So what had you done? Well, you shouldn't have entered the intersection if your exit is blocked. That's the rule, Jonathan. Well, the light was green. But you're right, she's right. You meant to wait. I took a gamble. I've had a ticket for that.

Oh, right. Is that the rule? Yeah, don't enter if your exit is blocked. Well, I guess that makes sense, right? Because you can't, you know. You can't get out of the way. Yeah, so wait for it to go. So any sympathy now, you've lost all the sympathy.

Broken the road rules. There's a Toyota Corolla pumped right next to me on my passenger side door just making their presence known that they've got the green

they're good to go you'd be the same situation though you reverse that you'd be that same person 100% I love watching

people stranded I hate being the one stranded and you don't look straight ahead don't look at them the only thing that can make this worse right now is some person coming to wash the windows.

I don't have any spare change to make it more awkward. But guess what happened? What? Sirens come. Oh. Emergency services. So it's a fire engine. And I'm like, uh-oh, I'm blocking the intersection here.

Now, I don't want to be responsible for the fire engine turning up 40 seconds late. House is burnt to the ground. You know? So I'm like, well, there was only one exit point. The only exit point was the bus lane, which was clear. Right. I'm like, I'm going to have to do it. So I had to drive down the bus lane.

I'm like, this is $150. I know I can feel it. This is going to come through later. I can feel the money coming through my bank. I've got the letter turning up at reception here in about three weeks but that was and then the fire engine behind me

so I'm going along the bus lane fire engine's moving behind me they're doing the bus lane too obviously yeah that's their exit point

as well tell you I got home a lot quicker how long did you stay on the bus lane and it cost were you speeding too I don't want to hold up

a fire engine 89km's down the bus lane Emergency guys I felt like the You know when someone's got an entourage Yeah like the president or something The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast There is a news clip going viral

And we will put it on the Hits Breakfast Instagram and Facebook as well So you can have a look at it It's the end of a marathon race I think it i think it's in brazil i think it's happening uh and producer tyler you've brought this one to everyone's attention so i feel like it's best for you to explain it because there there's over 24 000 comments already on it on tiktok and counting a lot of people throwing a lot of hatred towards this uh this husband yeah we've had some heated discussion in the studio already so picture this a mother of two she's just committed her whole life to um training for this huge marathon she

sees the finish line approaching quick but it's not a done deal yet she's still got runners behind her really on her case she's winning. She's about to win the marathon. And then out of nowhere, she spots her husband approach the side of the track with their two kids, and he gives the kids a nudge to go, there's mom, go say hi while she's winning. The mom, who's running about to win this huge marathon, starts signaling, stop, stop, stop, move,

she dodges her own kids and goes out of her way to avoid them to then go on to win the race. Right, and so what's the issue? Okay, control your kids and let the mum have her moment. But he's a busy dad who's been looking after the kids for, like, how long has a marathon been? An hour and 40 minutes. And he should be like, mate, I've done my time.

That's what a lot of people are thinking that he's done. He's kind of like, they'll push the kids out towards the mum. Can I just say, it was a dude behind her. So it wasn't another female runner. So it was a guy behind her. Yeah. So she probably had heaps of time. She maybe did have heaps of time.

Oh, because he's the, yeah, there are other competitors. The guy, the competitor behind is a guy. So if she might have been anyway, that's beside the point. Okay, but this is still even more powerful that she's just beaten a man as well kids are, yeah, there are other competitors. The competitor behind is a guy. So if she might have been anyway, that's beside the point. Okay, but this is still even more powerful that she's just beaten a man as well. Yeah, yeah. So if she was to lose to him because her kids, because her freaking husband couldn't control the kids for two seconds.

That man was probably coming 73rd or something. Oh, get out. Get out. Okay, so it's an interesting one. Whether he does actually push the kids out in front, because the kids are obviously excited to see the mum. He should have been behind the finish line. I get that.

Yes. A hundred percent. I agree with that. Here's my points. Should have been behind the finish line. You say whether he pushed them or whether he couldn't control them. Hold on to them. Be behind the finish line.

Yeah, yeah. Because he's like, oh, I tried. Oh, they got away on me. Come on, mate. He was trying to control the kids. There's two kids and a lot of kids. You should see the joy in her face when she finally wins it and she

clicks her stopwatch. It obviously meant a lot to her and she'd been training hard. She just wanted to have a moment as who she is. Fair enough. It's sad if it takes away from her moment. I'd just like to see that maybe there's intentions weren't like, here you go, I've had it for an hour and a half. I'm not saying, I just like to see that maybe his intentions weren't like, here you go,

I've had the birdie on half. I'm not saying he had malicious intentions. That's what I'm saying. I just mean it's a little bit ignorant. I'm saying maybe the kid got away, there's mum,

there's mum, and then one of them runs out and they're like, oh dear God, and now he's been made to look like a monster on the internet. Because he wasn't

taking into account how much this meant to her. And that's sad if that takes it away from her. I agree with that. He's trying to hold on to those kids. He's doing good. That's a that. He's trying to hold on to those kids. You've zoomed in.

That's a push. That's not a hold. But it says mum, there's mum. The kids are excited. He's like, wait, come back here kids. Oh, I lost control.

They just wanted to see their mum. Well, mummy had something else to do in this one moment and you just needed to hold on to them while I had my moment. And I agree. I feel like it's sad

if it's taken away for a moment but I also feel sad if he's getting bullied as well and that wasn't his intention, you know. Everyone's like, he's entitled, he's a bad dad, all that sort of stuff. He's a bloody good dad. He's looked after those kids for an hour and a half,

hasn't lost any of them. Hasn't lost any of them. He babysat them for an hour and a half. What more do you want from him? The hot son too. Bloody great dad. Which is why I wear hats, actually. They should wear hats.

They should be wearing hats. None of them are hats. She just wanted her moment. So what we want to open up this morning is a topic we do every week. It is... You are such a good dad. Such a good dad. You are...

So examples of dads getting credit for things. Going the extra mile. Holding on to the kids for an hour and 40 minutes. When they probably don't deserve to. Well, they do say the little things that count, don't they? And this morning, for example, I look at the kids' lunchboxes. I go, uh-oh, there's no bread. You know what I went and did?

What's that? I went to the freezer. I took out a loaf of bread. Oh, wow. You are such a good dad. Thank you. Such a good dad. What a great, yeah, that's great.

Okay, this is what we want. Hopefully the bread defrosted in time. Hopefully someone made sandwiches out of them. How long does it take for a loaf of bread to defrost? You did your part, though. Yeah, they want to reward good dads for doing minimal things. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We want some examples of people being such a good dad this morning.

You are such a good dad. Such a good dad. After a marathon race that's kind of turned sour for a lady who had her moments sort of taken away by what looked to be the husband, who couldn't really control the kids. She was about to win the marathon, and then the kids wanted to run out and greet her before she crossed the finish line. And the dad's like, oh, there's mummy. Way to go. Do it after she's finished. You're claiming it was a pad on the bottom get out there give mum a hug yeah ben's saying he's trying to wrangle he's the kids have got away on him maybe he did maybe it's just even if he's

wrangling stand behind the finish line totally agree on that well the good thing is he's been now labeled toxic toxic i know he's been called Oh, it's the internet. They take it to the Instagram. He's toxic. All the headlines are like, toxic, man. Toxic masculinity. Toxic. Okay, it's a bit far. No. It's a bit far. It's not far enough.

Let's keep going. Let's hunt him down. It's a silly mistake that we're all piling in on. Yeah, make him shut down his Instagram account. But then you see there's another theory, Ben, which you've been reading into the 24,000 comments. What if it wasn't the kids? Well, it was actually the mum. But then the girls got her arm up towards the lady,

so I feel like it was. But anyway, who's to know? I love how we all jump to all these conclusions on the internet. Maybe it was a young girl looking up to a woman and inspired by the female athlete. Be inspired after the finish line. So we're doing You Are Such a Good Dad, just recognising and acknowledging the basic parenting

or contributing to the household of the average father. Let's go to Jamie. Welcome to You Are Such a Good Dad, Jamie. Good morning. Yeah. You'd like to acknowledge your husband? He's an amazing dad. Our daughter is turning eight next Friday,

and she had to go to hospital yesterday to have some grommets put in, so didn't have time to organise her birthday invitation. So late last night, her father went out to his office and printed them off for her, and she could take to school today. Legend. Yep, and we were all excited about, yay, they're going to be these cute little poppet invitations. And she woke up, and she was like, oh, thanks.

Because they didn't fit in the envelope. But he is an awesome dad. And she was like, no, it's okay, dad. It's okay. And so as she continued getting ready for school, he popped back out to his office. And he resized it according to the envelope. He's actually come through. This time we're playing with no sarcasm.

No sarcasm, yeah. To be fair, he could have been given this. Absolutely no sarcasm whatsoever. So she's very happy this morning with her new grommet and her birthday invitations popping off to school to give them to her mate. And how sweet is she for saying, it's okay, Dad.

It's so sweet. Yeah, beautiful. Okay, not quite the sarcastic tone we're is she for saying, it's okay, Dad. It's so sweet. Yeah, beautiful. Not quite the sarcastic tone we're requiring for this segment, but we'll move on. Great text here. My husband is such a good dad. He'll turn the washing machine on so it's all ready for me to put on the line

when I get home. You are such a good dad. My husband does that. He leaves a post-it note on the bench saying washing, so I know it's in there. Oh, that's good. Great, great place. It keeps the household moving.

Yeah, yeah. It keeps that washing cycle going. You do forget about that sometimes, don't you? You do, right? Joanne, welcome to You Are Such a Good Dad. You are such a good dad. Take it away. Or not.

Hello. I'm not the boss. Oh, Joanne, you're there. Take it away. Hi. Sorry. Hi, yes. I've not the boss. Oh, Joanne, you're there. Take it away. Hi. Sorry. Hi. Yes. I've got home from work, having a shower. The son asks Dad for some money for petrol.

He says, yep, son. It takes money out of my wallet, and when I come out, he goes, I've just given our boy some money for his petrol. Doesn't matter what wallet it comes out of. Or what that cash was for. Yeah. The important thing is there's petrol in the car. Parenting was done. And he, yeah, and he said, I've given him money.

Yeah. Takes the credit. Duty fulfilled. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. Don't, don't, don't. Undies. And it's lima, lima.

There's chips. Chips. Friday. Flashback. As John I mentioned before, Married at First Sight New Zealand starts on Sunday night, Monday and Tuesday as well on 3. And it's the first time it's been on our screens for about five years we've done a version of it. Married at First Sight New Zealand is also aka Married at First Sight Lite, isn't it? Because we're all too polite, Don't want to cause a fuss. You've got a couple of strangers want to get on there,

have a hoon with someone, not cause a fuss. Well, it'd be interesting to see if it is still that way. Or maybe they've seen the Australia one. Very aggressive in Australia. Oh, there's fireworks. So maybe Kiwis will go, you know, 0 to 100 on it. I hope so. I hope so, yeah.

But generally, we don't like to ruffle feathers in this country, do we? You don't like to stick your head up too high. No. It'll be cut off. Because it's a very, like in Australia, you can be an absolute villain, but you've got millions of people to hide you. Over here, we can find you. We can chase you down with bits.

It's pretty small in New Zealand, right? Yeah. But we have a rich history of dating shows in this country, reality dating shows. And I'll take you back to the 90s. And this ran for a number of years, I think about 9 years there was a show called Blind Date, it was basically televised Tinder, they'd line up

three people on some stools person who was looking for someone, they'd be on another stool, they couldn't obviously see each other they'd just ask questions and stuff and they had to decide without seeing the person which they wanted to go on a date with, the most compatible Bloody catchy theme tune too. Have a listen.

Well, love is such a strange thing. It can happen any time. Happen any time. When you least expect it. Woo! It'll hit you from behind. Love will hit you from behind. I don't know if that stood the test of time.

A lot of shows haven't stood the test of time when you look at it right. But Dave Jamison was the host. Very good looking sort of game show host. And Susie Aiken. You remember Susie Aiken? Yeah. She was the co-host. And Dave would welcome her out to a sea of wolf whistles.

Have a listen. Please welcome Susie Aiken. Look at you. Look at you. Well, it's peak of the week. Peak of the week? Yeah, you know, Wednesday. In between.

Middle of the week. The downhill slide from here on into the weekend. The weekend. Yeah, some champagne banter too. Sounds like our show. So yeah, I love love that She comes out Yeah And she looked fantastic

She did look Yeah like great It was a great time on TV Where you girls All you had to do Was just wander around And you'd get bloody Whistled at

Just come out And look pretty love Look at you Anyway so she did have Another role on the show, apart from looking fantastic. Oh, did she? Yeah, she also introduced the contestants.

Okay, our first player is a keen bodybuilder who enjoys pumping iron. Let's welcome Kevin Williams. Our next player has a very unusual ambition. He would like to meet an extraterrestrial. Please welcome Todd Chapman. And finally, a guy who daydreams about good times and building cars. Welcome Patrick Mischieft.

The bloody three catches there. They all sound delightful. So I don't know who won that episode, but it made for great television. Back in the day, good, simple television. Well, I guess in a lot of ways, Married at First Sight is kind of like, it's blind date, really. But the experts put people together and they get married without meeting each other. And then see if they can form... It's just following on.

It's like the sequel to Blind Date. It's what happens in their relationship. I've got a bit of a pitch. Less wolf whistling. I'm a bit brainstorming here. How about every time Megan does the news, we're like, here's Megan Pappas. Woo! Woo! Ah-ooh-ga! La-la-la-la-la-la. here. How about every time Megan does the news we're like, here's Megan Palmer's Auga The Hits

The Jono and Ben Podcast Do they? Is that all you want to do, Megan? Yeah, all us girls want to have fun You girls included And probably things like equal pay That'd be nice Equal rights All you've been asking for is fun

Girls just want to have fun and mental rights That'd be nice. Yeah. Equal rights. Yeah, exactly. All you've been asking for is fun. So we've been... Girls just want to have fun and have equal rights. And a whole lot... She should have put more into that song, really. Yeah. Now, we've been following this story with a lot of interest about the Auckland Council taking away all the bins. Oh, it's been winding me up.

Yeah, we're based out of Auckland, and bins, about four or five weeks ago, started mysteriously just disappearing. You know, bins mysteriously just disappearing. You know, bins that were sitting there, good bins, good bins on the footpath, good honest bins where you could dump your household rubbish, you know, any excess stuff, and then someone else would deal with it. Boy, a third of the rubbish bins around Auckland, I think it's happening around other regions throughout the country, but this is to save $9.5 million.

$9.5 million over the next day financial year so i could see in some ways why they're doing it but then they're copping a lot of flack the auckland council because they put a 150 000 statue at the park where they removed the rubbish bin there was a good rubbish bin why would you place a good rubbish bin with a great statue well yeah that's what they're getting flack about right now it's a cost-saving measure and then they're like here's this very expensive, beautiful statue. That we're putting up as well. Can you put rubbish in it?

You can probably put rubbish on top of it. Oh, yeah, good. As long as you put rubbish on top of it. Some sort of rubbish disposal there. Well, it does get a lot of grief, doesn't it, the city of Auckland? Megan, I know you refuse to take any bus. Also, because it's very unreliable, public transport in Auckland. Never been on a bus? If we're honest. Oh, it's very unreliable, public transport in Auckland.

Never been on a bus? If we're honest. Oh, it's crazy, never. Someone's forced me to go on one of those airport buses. That's not a real bus. Yeah. Is it not? We're talking about the battler,

blood smeared all over the windows. There's a guy doing something really questionable in the back seat. What are those buses? Yeah, well one day we need to get you on a bus. Oh, do we? Yeah, we need to do that need to get you on a bus. Oh, do we? Yeah, we need to do that. We've had a dream to go to all the main centres

and catch all the public bus transport. Do the show on there. Get Megan on there. You talk to the people. That's right. I wouldn't even know how to. Oh, we'll help you. That's right.

We'll load up a hop card or whatever, and we'll get you on the way, all right? All right, wait. My daughter can do it. The guy in the school, you can do it. All right, mate? Yeah, sure. As you've said before Auckland you know

Gets a bit of a hard rap You know with the traffic People probably sitting In cars right now On buses Heading to work They tell me The rest of the country

Not that fond of Aucklanders Have you heard that No I haven't Yeah So we thought we'd give Auckland a bit of a tribute This morning There's a song

A great song by Dasher Austin Did your boot stop working Did your truck break down Playing tribute to Austin in America. Now you can see where we're heading. Yeah. Hopefully you can see where we're heading.

We thought we'd pay some tribute to Auckland, the city of Auckland, this morning with this song. Did the train stop working? Did the bus break down? Eighty bucks for parking or get towed in town. Expensive homes with pricey rents and almond mock coffees. Ram Raiders smash through shops at night and Wayne Brown seems so stroppy.

Was the sewer flowing in the beach at night? Did you go out to town and get in a fight? I crawled today on the motorway, stuck here on the southern. In 40 years, I'll still be here Gridlocked up in Auckland There you go. Tribute to Auckland right there.

Tribute? Well, tribute question mark. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. A lot of rumours swirling around about Jennifer Lopez and Brad Pitt. Maybe their relationship sadly is all over, their marriage. She got asked in a press conference for a movie.

That seems like a great time to ask. A reporter said. Was it a Spanish press? What do you want to say? And she said, she just replied. You know better than that. You know better than that. She leaned down, put her elbows on her knees and just said, you know better than that.

And then one of the other actors who was up there as well was like, come on, we're not doing that, basically. And then went into a lovely heartfelt speech about how great she was and how much she means to her and him and the project and stuff, which was lovely. To be fair, when the journo asked it, a lot of people in the room were like, oh. But then we're all going, bloody good question, though. It's the one we all wanted to ask. She could have taken a leaf out of the Crusaders coach and just. Called her a seabomb.

Dropped her a seabomb. Dropped a seabomb. Who's that disrespectful sea oh well let's we want to know though

don't tell me you don't want to know to be honest no it's their business I'm going to say it's

their business I hope it's okay yeah me too I was happy for them it's good coming from a

Spanish person too because it sounds exotic less offensive even though it is offensive now you know I don't like answering numbers the phone of numbers that I don't know Sounds an exotic. It's less offensive, even though it is offensive.

Now, you know, I don't like answering numbers. The phone of numbers that I don't know. Oh, private numbers. Or even numbers I don't know now I'm just skeptical of. What are you running from? Well, I just feel like there's scams, there's people that put you on the spot. I'm not very good at when I get put on the spot with stuff. Every time you answer, it's like, this is why I don't answer.

This is why. In the 90s, you didn't have an option. You just answered that bloody landline and whoever was on the other line, you had to give them the time of day. It felt like back then, hanging up wasn't an option on people. No, it's true. You saw the conversation through. All the way through to the end. Politely to the end. Torture.

I didn't answer a phone call. I went through to messages. Someone left a message. I'm not going to say who. And this was a week or so ago. And they wanted me to do something. And they left all the things going. It's on this date. Thank you. Be part of this.

Did you check the voicemail? Check the voicemail. Wow. Check the voicemail. And I was like, hey. But at the same time, I was like. I don't want to do this. Am I a bad person because I wanted to kind of.

Well, what was it for? It depends. Was it like a children's hospital? No, not like that. You're allowed to not do something. Am I a bad person because I wanted to kind of... Well, what was it for? Depends what it was. Was it like a children's hospital? No, not like that. You're allowed to not do something. You're a grown up. So, well, I feel awkward just saying, no, I don't want to do it.

Because that's what my wife said. She just ring back and say, oh, no, I'd rather not do it. I said, I can't do that. So I was like, I'll formulate a plan. They've said the date. I was like, hey, actually, you know, one of the kids has got something on that day.

And it's true. The kids don't. But anyway, we'll believe you. So I was like, yeah, they do. But maybe the kids has got something on that day. And it's true. The kids don't. But anyway, we'll believe you. So I was like, yeah, we do. But maybe I could get someone else to cover it. But anyway, I was like, no, I'll ring back and say, hey. So I did. I rang back.

I said, thanks. Thanks so much for the message. Got it. Unfortunately. The kids. But God, one of those days. I tell you what, this is one of the bonuses of having kids. You can pin a lot of stuff on kids.

I said, unfortunately, can't do it because one of the kids has gone on that day. But really sorry, any other day would have been fine. Don't say any other day would be fine. And they said, well, actually, we've had to move. Oh, Ben.

Move the thing to another day. So you'll be available for that one? And I was like. Because you said, any other day will be fine. Took a deep breath. I was like, yeah, no worries. I can do that for you.

So now I'm doing it. Now I'm doing it. Now I'm doing it. But reluctantly doing it. Something else has got to come up. Well, I couldn't have another excuse. I was like, any other day I'd be fine. And then when they went, well, we actually moved it. No, you can use the kids again when it gets close and be like, oh, kids are sick.

I have to do it now. But yeah, just don't. Word to the wise, maybe. Just be honest and say, thank you for thinking of me but I'm going to politely decline this time I should have done that but I didn't that sounds nice

coming from you it does yeah you don't even have to give people a reason aka I couldn't think of anything worse and do you know

if Jennifer Lopez and Brad Pitt sorry I'm sorry Ben Halfling are still together the hits the Jono and Ben podcast you've got your jacket on

your statement piece yeah she calls it my statement piece. She's like, you own one nice jacket. No, you own a couple. Thank you. And I rotate them consistently. So I had to go and get my daughter a new rain jacket yesterday,

and the weather was a bit shaky. So I went into the jacket shop. They specialise in other goods as well. But I made the fatal mistake, and I don't know if you've ever done this, of wearing a jacket that I'd bought years before into the jacket shop, a jacket they're still stocking. So I've wandered into the shop, the fatal mistake of wandering into the shop with an item of clothing that's also on the rack.

And the first thing that runs through my head is, well, it looks like I've either tried it on and haven't taken it off yet or I'm casually trying to shoplift this jacket and I get inside my head and I'm thinking about the worst case scenarios which I know you've had this instance with an apple at the supermarket you ended up paying for the apple

you bought him in your pocket oh my god well yeah was it a mandarin or an apple whatever it was I bought fruit into the supermarket not realising yeah I had it in my pocket I was going to eat later then I walked in I was like oh dear god I've got a mandarin or an apple? Whatever it was, I bought fruit into the supermarket. It was a mandarin. Yeah, I had it in my pocket.

I was going to eat later. Then I walked in. I was like, oh, dear God, I've got a mandarin now. I look like I've shoplifted it. So in the end, I put it in a bag with other mandarins and bought it on the way out. And I was like, damn it, I played twice for that mandarin. Yeah.

An apple would never work in a pocket. Far too big for a pocket. But yeah, so he ended up paying for that. So I'm thinking, OK, what are my options here? I could run out of the store, end up in a police chase, have the eagle chasing me down, live a life of crime. That's option A. That's an option, I guess.

Option B, take it off, put it under my T-shirt, and try and surreptitiously walk out of the store. That's worse. Yeah, that's worse. But they seem quite dodgy. You hadn't done anything wrong. No. Option C, go to the counter

explain the scenario I said hey mate I'm here on a jacket shopping mission just so you know I bought this jacket three years ago I've just worn it in

must be in pretty good condition he couldn't well I don't wear rain jackets much in our line of work conditions are pretty consistent inside the studio

and he couldn't have given any less crap I've read his whole storyline in my head conditions are pretty consistent inside the studio and he couldn't have given any less crap i've read his whole storyline in my head and then i'm thinking have i just created the the ultimate shopping hack you've got a jacket you walk into a shop and you swap it with the same jacket well what's the point of that well you upgrade your job all right but you know that will have a little tag on it that'll beep on the way out. Yeah. That's normally how they tell you if you're shoplifted an item.

But then often the bags will beep and you're like, well, I bought all of this. And they're like, you're all right. Out you go. And I'm like, what happens when someone's actually shoplifted? They don't care, mate. They don't care. They don't get paid enough to care. They're like, oh, the beep goes off all day long.

Do you know another great hack? A friend of mine, his son went to camp, lost his pants. Okay. Then about three days later, he gets a call from the shop where they purchased the pants. And they're like, hey, just out of interest, you here trying to, you know, get refund for your pants you bought. And he's like, no, my son lost them at camp. And they're like, oh. So someone had somehow ended up with the kids' pants in their bag,

intentionally or unintentionally, and then the parent took the pants to the shop and tried to get a refund for the pants. Reeky, reeky. Now that's a hack. You watch out for your pants today, Ben Boyce. Don't be taking those down to Helen Stein's, buddy. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

Now, I feel like we need to bring this up because, Megan, you're being a little light on details, but I overheard you talking to the producer, Grace, and producer, Taylor, about Andrew. Andrew, your partner, your husband. His husband, yeah. We always talk about your sickeningly cute relationship. Vomit-inducing relationship.

And I'm like, was this another example of something cringy or is this quite cute because it sounds like you just sound like you're jealous i am jealous i'm jealous you get to be with him and he does all these wonderful things because yesterday yesterday he made you what is my god that's right saying a handmade card? Yeah. So he works. But yesterday he came home and he was like, I've made you something today. And I was like, what? And so he had made a card. His beakers are not bad, are they?

He'd done like polka dots all over the card. And he made me a card from scratch with some nice words, which I'm not going to read to you. Read the words. I feel like you should read the nice words. So it not going to read to you read the words read the words so it was birthday anniversary what was it yesterday no it was nothing

just a Thursday it was just a Thursday Thursday card no Thursday had he screwed up badly for something no

he's even like stuck black paper in there to create like a little border for the card maybe secretly he screwed up he's a big kid she's going to find out

about this or he wants to find out about this. Or he wants to go out this weekend, play some golf or something, you know. No, we're going out to a dinner together this weekend. Jeez, he's perfect, isn't he? Do you actually want me to read it? Yeah, I would love to. No, I'll probably vomit, but we'll definitely read it.

And I haven't asked him either. He'll be fine. Well, you read it. I mean, it's up to you if you want to. Well, there's nothing personal in it. It just says. No sexual requests? No. Good, okay, that's up to you if you want to. Well, there's nothing personal in it. It just says. No sexual requests? No.

Good. Okay, that's fine. Keep reading. To my darling wife, I just want to let you know that you are the most beautiful girl and you are incredibly special to me. I'm so lucky to call you my wife, thinking of you always. Oh, my God. Oh, he's...

Oh, God. No, but do you know what? I always say Like a homemade card Is the sweetest thing Because it takes time It takes effort And it was nice words Like when you text

How many emojis With like love hearts Are you sending to each other Sometimes there's a few emojis Yeah I bet Do you have that Stoned looking face With the three hearts

All over it Yeah yeah It's a favourite When you're running a marathon Does he push the kids Out in front of you No I wouldn't dare No I bet he wouldn't either

No make your wives a card and see what happens. They'll be like, what have you done? Well, what do you want to do? Definitely. Definitely. There's no way I'd do that. We're like, this is weird. What do you want to do?

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We've got to be surprised. You've organised a surprise for us, Jono. Yeah, a guest. Who? Mystery guest on the phone. Someone who's made headlines over the last guest who? Mystery guest on the phone. Someone who's made headlines over the last

few days. Mystery guest, hello. Good morning, how are you, mate? Lovely to have you on, mate. Now, Megan and Ben, they can ask you questions, you can simply answer with a yes or no to try to decipher who we have pulled from the news over the last week

or so. Okay, the news. Okay. Good morning. So are you in New Zealand, mystery guest? Yes. Okay. Are you in a sporting field? No.

Okay. Oh, okay. But you might know him from sport. Yeah, that's true. I'm on the fringes there. On the fringes of sport? Okay. So are you an entertainer?

Only by accident. Okay. Do you appear on TV? Yes. Ooh. Would we have known your name before the last seven days? No. Oh, okay.

So it's very recent. Someone's done something. Oh, okay. So it's very recent. Someone's done something. Oh, I think I... Have you got it? Could I... Would it be bad if I... If you think you know... Do you really think I might have it?

Well, okay. I can give a little... Why don't we give a little clue and you can do a couple of lines of how we might know you. Okay. They were down against the Panthers. Yes! Yes!

Yes! Oh! Yeah, the school principal! It's the school principal! Yeah! Mark Harrop, Nahina Puri's school principal, went viral during the week for this speech

after the Warriors' incredible win against the Panthers last weekend. Ten key players out with injuries. No short shots. No up-and-downs. Captain Tom Harris out with a broken finger. Five minutes into the game, they lose their hooker. I think we're looking bad.

But with a whole bunch of inexperienced young players stepped up. They never gave up. They played with heart. And they won the game. Amazing, isn't it? They won against the Panthers. Anyway, resilience, that's what it looks like. It's our favourite moment from the last week. I mean, it's up there with the Warriors winning over the weekend.

Did you know at the time that someone was filming it, it was going to go viral? Mate, I tell you now, I had no clue. That stuff that happened there, that's a pretty standard assembly for me, to be honest. I had no clue i was sitting in a pta meeting uh that night and i got a phone call from like a newspaper saying are you

the principal from the tiktok video and i actually freaked out because i thought what what have i done or said have i done a dance or something trying to recap my life in the last 24 hours to make sure i hadn't done anything stupid. And then they said about the Assembler, I thought, what the heck? And then one of my mums managed to find it. I thought, here we go. What has that done? Yeah, it's been crazy, man. It's been a crazy few days.

I couldn't believe how nuts it's gone. It was on the news. I saw it on the news. It's been all over the internet as well. It's incredible. It was great. So obviously a huge Warriors fan. So every Monday morning at Assembly, are you reviewing the Warriors' performance in front of the kids?

Well, there's not been a lot to say lately, to be fair. But, you know, they tend to expect it. All the kids, you know, the whole After Wires movement thing just went bananas last year, and that really captured the kids' attention. So it was just an easy way to connect with them, really. And being such a major fan, it was an easy one for me too because I always had something to say.

So your other inspirational speeches, what have you drawn inspiration from? Well, you draw inspiration from whatever's happening in the world. You draw inspiration from your children. Like, it's great to be able to put a kid up if they've done something awesome. Like, we had a kid that was just in a local Hamilton production of Sweeney Todd.

Give him major raps in front of the kids or just, you know, be able to celebrate success and be able to celebrate people doing great things or stepping out of their comfort zones and showing kids it's all right to be passionate about things. That's really what I try to do. That's really awesome and a great message. Did you know that was going to be your message? Because it felt like at the end you're like, oh, resilience. That's what I'm talking about.

Mate, I get up in front of the kids and my mouth and things start coming out. I don't know that was going to be your message? Because it felt like at the end you're like, oh, resilience. That's what I'm talking about. Mate, I get up in front of the kids and my mouth and things start coming out. I don't know what's going to happen. Hopefully this is going somewhere. I'd better tie this up shortly. Resilience. But it was a great message about resilience.

You could tell you changed gear a bit when you're like, oh, that's right. Yeah, resilience. That's the thing. Where is it? Up, oh, that's right, yeah, resilience. That's the thing. Where is it? Up the wire, kids. All right, let's go. Come Monday, he's going to have another inspirational speech about the Dolphins beating the Dolphins.

Dolphins are near the top of the table. Mate, I tell you, we'll be talking about Cantona all week. It's going to be fantastic. Hey, lovely to meet you, mate. You're going to have a wonderful weekend there, Mark. Appreciate your time. Yeah, no worries, team. Thank you very much. The Hits, the. You and have a wonderful weekend there, Mark. Appreciate your time. Yeah, no worries, team. Thank you very much.

The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. We love famous people saying favorable things about New Zealand, right? Yeah. Like they say their name. And Rita Ora, who's married to Taika Waititi, she spends a lot of time in New Zealand as well. They have a house in Auckland.

Yeah, she was on Kelly Clarkson's show over there in America. And guess what, guys? Uh-oh. Talked about New Zealand. Uh-oh. Now, would they say some favorable things? Well, yes, but have a listen. Wait, did you also spend time in New Zealand when I love New Zealand?

You're there quite a bit, right? Guys, I fell in love. I got married. He's from New Zealand. Yeah. And now I'm like in New Zealand. It couldn't be further away from planet Earth and me and from anything else. And it's amazing.

It's so beautiful. And yeah, it's a nice little break for me, I think. It's a nice like get away from everything and all the craziness. She also went on to say that's great. I don't have to wear makeup and stuff when I'm out there. She's got like, she says a few words Kiwi-like. Her British accent's flattening out. I'm getting undertones of her also going,

it's a bit of a desolate way, Sally, where no one will find you. And you don't need to dress up. It's just like, you don't have to wear makeup. No one gives a shit what you look like. Which is good. Which is great. I hope she told them we have the internet.

So you wear Ugg boots to the supermarket on a Friday night, that sort of thing. I mean, it's great that we are that relaxed, but internationally we don't need that. We don't need that brand damage internationally. We're just starting to shake the old sheep rumours. Sabrina was like, it's great, guys. No one knows where you are. No one will see you.

You'll be dowdy as no one cares. I could look like a sack of potatoes. And we won't care. Wear pyjamas to the supermarket. Embrace it. It's good. I mean, you've got to be known for something, care wear pajamas to the supermarket embrace it it's good i mean you've got to be known for something as you say john so that's great i mean it's awesome that she has such a great time here so yeah embrace it take your makeup off you know she means it in a positive way exactly she's coming from a place very superficial and all in your face

yeah you're right new zealand where your standards are now, lower them. That could be our new slogan. We're okay with that. That's fine. We'll welcome you. Just come up with the perfect catchphrase for New Zealand this morning. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. Megan, you're going to have a great weekend.

Yeah, I'm actually going out tomorrow night. It doesn't happen often. Me and my husband are going to babysit. Well, actually, thank you to the in-laws who are looking after the kids. Shout out to the in-laws. What are their names? Vida and Mike. Vida and Mike. On an hourly rate? No.

The love of the children. The love of the children. For the love of the grandos. Yeah, those people. So we're going to a dinner with friends and to zhuzh it up a bit. It's like a potluck, but they've said you have to bring a dish that you've seen on social media. Ah.

That's a really cool theme there. Yeah. Okay, so you're bringing one dish. Everyone's going to bring a dish that you've seen on social media. Ah, that's a really cool theme there. Yeah. Okay, so you're bringing one dish. Everyone's going to bring dishes. I know you're a foodie too. You're a big, you're a big, we were talking to her during the week. She prepares meals from scratch. She sent through the raw ingredients for a chicken soup yesterday to the WhatsApp group.

I was like, it's not from scratch. You didn't raise the chicken? I didn't raise and kill the chicken. From a tiny little chicken. No. So that's not from switch in my opinion. No stock in this soup though. I'm making my own stock.

So make some amazing stuff. You brought in some biscuits yesterday, some roughies, which was good to see. Yeah, we learnt that the roughies have a controversial name, which we've all been calling it. Won't mention it now.

Don't want to get cancelled, man. It's the chocolate biscuits with the chocolate icing and the walnut on top. You can do your own research into that controversial history. So what we need right now, because I'm sure like me and like all of us, on social media you do see some amazing recipes. That's my algorithm. It's just recipes.

But now I'm overwhelmed. And also there's the wow factor. You want something that's going to be easy but also wow people. For you, there is. I mean, I've told you before, I'm the cheese guy when I'm ever invited to a party now. Just bring some cheeses, mate. Block of Edam.

Cheese board. Block of Edam. You know, you can go. A couple of saladas. Oh, jeez. You should have been going like a brie or a camembert or anything. Help yourselves. I mean, I've been caught in the air fryer algorithm of late

because I've got one of those recently. And I've been making quite a lot of stuff from that. I'm not opposed to air fryer recipes. Love the air fryer. So yeah, 0800 the hits, 4487. We've got some help pizza for you today. We want something that someone's made as well too. Not just they've seen, they've actually made it and gone,

hey, Megan, you should make this for the potluck. Anything looks good on a 15 second social media video. They're like boom, these people with these beautifully manicured hands, you just see their hands. So quick and easy and then you do it and you're like, oh god. They display the ingredients and it's like, edit, edit, jump cut, jump cut and then you're like, bang, delicious

cheeseburger lasagna meal. Yeah. Make one of those, I've showed you that. No, I'm not going to make that. Yeah, that is a nacho lasagna. Yeah, this is what you're into. Okay. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Megan wants to create some beautiful things to head along to a potluck party this weekend.

And you need to bring something that you've seen on social media. You need to create that dish. Yeah. I forgot to mention that there is a competitive element, so everyone's going to be judged. Right. On what they bring and who's got the best. You're entering a My Kitchen Rules environment. High-pressure stuff.

I sent you yesterday on the WhatsApp group a can of traditional Italian cuisine. Oh, jeez. Watties, spaghetti, and sausages. You said you've never seen or tried that. I haven't tried the one with sausages. Oh, haven't you? Oh, well, they claim that...

I don't know about the sausages. They're just little, aren't they? They're just tiny little bullets of what they claim to be sausage. Meat. Who knows? Just don't think too hard about it. It's a little tiny finger of mystery meat, and it tastes bloody delicious.

Put that into something. I mean, that's champagne in terms of spaghetti, though, isn't it? I mean, that's classic. You've got high-end spaghetti. Yeah, that's how the other half lives when it comes to spaghetti. Oh, I've got one for sausages. You're not buying oak, are you? Yeah. Hang on, mate. Waddy's all the way half lives when it comes to spaghetti. Oh, I've got one for sausages. You're not buying oak, are you? Yeah, mate.

Hang on, what is all the way? What is it with sausages? Ooh la la. What a posh wanker. All right, Mel, you've cooked off social media. You want to suggest something? Yeah, good morning. After my 16-year-old daughter makes this recipe a few times,

it's a block of feta and some cherry tomatoes, and you just bake it in the oven. And then you mix it up, it goes all creamy, and you add in some pasta. But she zhuzhes it up a bit and adds some cooked chicken and a wee bit of pesto. Ooh! Bit of a winner.

I've seen this one, and I've always wondered if it blends up nicely. Yeah. Just roasting, bit of garlic in there. Yeah, it's so good. You can even chuck the bloody water you spaghetti and sausages in there as well. It's not going to get carried away, mate.

Now, you've committed a crime. Not so sure about that. Mel in Southland, your daughter's committed a crime, an Italian crime, where producer Taylor claims no Italian pasta dish has chicken in it. No, and Mel, I just want to say, first up, I've tried this recipe off TikTok

and it is amazing. It is amazing. Yeah. But yeah, chicken in it. No, and Mel, I just want to say, first up, I've tried this recipe off TikTok, and it is amazing. It is amazing. Yeah. But, yeah, chicken in pasta, not okay. Oh, look, we're all doing it. We're all enjoying it, mate. Let us be, all right? We're putting bacon and egg in sushi, mate.

We'll do anything. Can we recommend maybe a pork veal mince or a beautiful prosciutto? Oh, you can do that if you want. Even bacon. All right. Hey, that's a great suggestion. Thank you so much. We're going to send you out some hell pizza.

There we go, Mel. Have a great day. Taranaki is where we're heading. Anna, what have you cooked off Sosh? Ah, so caramel grapes. It's not cooking exactly, but it always gets an ooh and an ah when I make it. And you have a bunch of grapes and you wash them. I usually use really nice sweet green ones.

Lovely. And you tail dry them, then you gently put them in a bowl. You get a punnet of sour cream and two tablespoons of soft brown sugar. Mix that together and then you pour it over the grapes and it tastes like caramel

and then you just sprinkle a tiny bit of nutmeg on top. Sour cream and grapes. And that sounds, wow, and it works. And sugar. And you just. Soft brown sugar. You just mix it together and the sugar melts and it tastes like a creamy caramel.

Wow. We're all something. Oh, man, yeah. Crazy, crazy talk. Sour cream and grapes. You never know. Never know. What's sugar? What's sugar? Soft brown sugar. we're all something oh mate yeah crazy crazy talk sour cream and grapes but there you you never know never know

with sugar with sugar soft brown sugar soft brown sugar ah well thank you very much I'm going to call you soft brown sugar now Anna

please don't it's going to be my nickname for you that's a great suggestion as well yeah I love that and better than the one my daughter tried to make

the other day which she'd seen on TikTok and now the insincorator is not working. It's not that one with the toffee croutons? Yeah, it's like hardened sugar, carrot, down the Encingerade. Anyway, we'll get that sorted.

Have you seen the Big Mac one where you use the tortilla and you put mince on it? Yes, I have seen that. You flatten the mince and you do the Big Mac. We've had that. That's great. But I tell you what, Jembo, she takes control of cooking the Big Macs. But by the end of it,

because you can only fit one in the pan at a time, so it becomes a line. By the time she's made all the Big Macs for everyone in the household, she's like, I'm so sick of looking at this. I don't want to eat. So now I guess that's where the healthy part comes in. And that's where you,

because you don't end up eating. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Apple Music has just brought out a list of the 100 best albums of all time. This is not to do with streaming numbers on their site. This is to do with a team of experts along with artists, songwriters, producers, and industry professionals judging albums on what they think are the best of all time, which is very, very hard and very subjective, right?

We are the industry unprofessionals. Just saying, just chucking their two cents in there. But yeah, I mean, music, there's so many different genres of it now. How do you pick your favourites? Everyone's favourites are going to be different. Exactly. So that's the top 10. Okay, we'll go from number 10, Beyoncé, Lemonade.

Great. Not Lemonade. I'll do the singing as you go. Nirvana, Nevermind. Amy Wanhus. Hello, hello. I'll do the singing as you go. Nirvana, Nevermind. Amy Wanhus. Hello, hello. Back to Black. Kendrick Lamar.

I'm going to rehab. Is it Stevie Wonder? Very superstitious. Frank Ocean, Blonde. Prince, Purple Rain. Purple Rain. And the top three. Here we go.

We don't need you. Thank you. That was wonderful singing, but we don't need you right now. We've got number three, The Beatles, Abbey Road. I mean, The Beatles, one of the most iconic bands of all time. Number two, Michael Jackson, Thriller. And this is the one that's causing a lot of chat today, Lauryn Hill's The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill,

which is a great album, but that's number one. But is it the best album of all time? The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill, which is a great album, but that's number one. Let me tell you that everything is everything. But is it the best album of all time? I guess that's the question. Number one was always going to be controversial. Yeah, yeah. Everyone was always going to debate number one. Yeah, I mean, in the top 100, Lorde gets in at number 94, which is awesome.

No Queen, no Mariah Carey. No Queen. Yeah, no Katy Perry, no Frank Sinatra, no Pearl Jam. So a lot of debate raging over the top 100 list. The Weeknd's not in there either. I'm a big fan of The Weeknd. No. Taylor Swift in it at number 18 for 1989.

It's a great album. Yeah, I mean, these are all great albums. You'd hope they're all pretty good albums. I feel like these days the album's not quite as important as it once was. When you bought a CD or a cassette, whatever it is, the album, you listen to it from start. I mean, I know a lot of people have records, but now it seems more about the singles, doesn't it? Yeah.

You listen to an album, you go, oh, that song's not as good as that one, or this album's great from start to finish, but now you kind of just go, oh, I'll listen to two songs from that album. When are we going to get a list of the 100 greatest 15- song hooks from tiktok there's some great song hooks out there right sometimes you hear the whole song you're like oh weird is that how that goes yeah because you only hear a little bit from it yeah i just like that little snippet yeah you've been at a concert where

um where a song is big on tick tock and then that 15, 20 seconds. Everyone's doing like a TikTok dance in that song. But in that like 15, 20 second moment, you look around and everyone's like, got their phones out, doing that thing. Suddenly like little patches in the crowd lights up where people have got their phones out. Here's the TikTok bit, guys. And the poor artist must be very disheartening.

Yeah. I've put on an hour and a half show here and you really are just here for 15 seconds. Although Paul Russell, Little Boo Thing, that was just aiktok he just wrote that for a tiktok it was like a short little thing and then they went oh it's going really well so full song i think you scraped through to like a minute 58 that's all i could do two minutes it's not much more in this feels like two hours on tiktok exactly so there you go the top 100 albums of all time