Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Jono Faces a Listener Confrontation Over Old Remarks

Episode Date: November 25, 2025

On today’s show: A Listener confronts Jono about some… questionable comments from the past. How Ben’s brother-in-law is out-manning him! We chat public performance fails, including Ben;s school fireworks mishap and a sunburnt stripper Producer Troy recounts a trumpet fail during an Anzac Day dawn service Listener Shannon has a loophole for the Mariah game... Megan’s devious plan to get a handbag for Christmas  Comedian Josh Thompson joins to discuss his tour, punctuality issues, and heckler experiences Instagram: @THEHITSBREAKFASTFacebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono, Ben & MeganSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The John O'Ben and Megan podcast, thanks to Dilma. Goodness really does taste great. Dilma, making the world a better team. Welcome to the podcast. You'll hear a little game that we played on the podcast today, well, on the show today, sorry, to do with the new system on the Apple phones, the new phones, they seem to record a little message,

and then the person that you've tried to call gets to hear a little message back from AI. Like a little teaser of what you want to talk to them about. Do you want to talk to Megan about whatever she's calling about? And then you decide if you want to talk to them on it. We really need to actually nowadays, before we even make a call, have something in the back of your mind, a little hook, a teaser, as we'd call it in the radio industry, of why this person might be interested in conversating with you.

And we did a game where we got a bunch of callers to phone through. Producer Troy recorded them for about five seconds each, just quick little lines about what they wanted to talk to us about, and we only could choose one. Now, there was one that did intrigue us that we didn't go to. So we'll do it now on the podcast and clear the admin, Nicole, welcome. Hello.

Lovely to have you on, Nicole. Now, your message was sitting along the lines of, I'm just calling to talk to Jono. There's been a lot of stuff said recently that is starting to offend me, and I'd like to address it. Yeah, well, it's been recent over the last seven and a half years. Well, that's recent.

You know, what your gauge of recent is, yeah? Oh, God. Yeah, it's extended. There was one certain thing that did really offend me, but I think someone bit me to it and got to the BSA before me. What was that? What was that?

Was it something coarse language regarding women's genitalia? Oh. In about 2017, me? Me! Did I say something

it was coarse language about women's genitalia? Well, I'm a woman. I'm a woman, and I don't like it. Okay. Oh, geez, what did you say? What did you say?

What did you say? That's a long time ago. I think you need to come clean. What did you say? I can't, do you want to be honest, Nicole? I have no recollection of this. I've said some stuff, you know? Even, you know, if you go beyond the 10-year mark,

said some more, wild stuff, wild stuff you wouldn't say nowadays. There's a lot of borderline stuff? Yeah. Okay, well, uh... I think you've got free passes in New Zealand because you've gone away with, you know, as you say, a crime spree. Yeah, a crime spree. Yeah, a verbal crime spree.

It is. It's a verbal crime spray. Oh, well, thank you, Nicole. An extensive one. Okay, well, I'll dial back for you. And you have a lovely day and enjoy the podcast. Don't dial it back. I'm watching you, mate.

Love it. See you, Nicole. Have a good one. See it. Producer Troy. I've actually just used complexity, to find out John O'Pry, BSA complaints. Oh, how many is there?

Well, it just says, John O'Pry has been involved in the BSA complaints, primarily related to his work on the edge. One notable instance, involved a complaint regarding prior referring to a particular television channel with a derogatory term during a broadcast. Oh!

The specifics have been hidden. A lot of them you don't actually... Sometimes, yeah. Yeah, management kind of just... Sleep it under the row, yeah. Pay off some people and stuff, you know? Go buy yourself something nice. No record.

We get a smack on the handy every single time. We'll enjoy the podcast. But right now, at home, my wife's got some family back from the States, her brothers live in America, and one of them staying with us, the other one's staying with her mum. I imagine you've designed a relentless tour schedule for the moment. Well, yeah, I'm sort of, no, kind of leave her that's there. I mean, I could love to, but...

Don't get me wrong. He would have them in Rotorua, the beehive and bluff in one day. But hey, no, that's on their family time, because my wife's out of the back operation, so, you know, it's good that they can spend some time together. but, you know, Hamish has been staying I mean, his brother, our house for a few days and, geez, it's, well, incredible. The stuff that he has done around the house.

Now, just like, and a lot of it unprompted. Handy? It's just handy and technical, things that I am not, you know, like there's been a drawer in the office, you know, that's been broken, we've got a little office area, and he fixed that, you know, fix that. All our laptops now connect to the printer. I don't know, one of those things, all these things that, you know,

like, something in the garage. I don't think any house in the history of houses where all the laptops have connected to the printer. Yeah, that's right. Mine works now. All of a sudden it's like a garden shed kit set thing. There's like a garden shed kit set thing that's been sitting there for about five years in our garage. He just put that up.

He put that up. You know, like it's all these things. Is he just finding this stuff on his own to do? Yeah, a lot of it. Or sometimes he'll go to Amanda, my wife, you know, what the thing? And she goes, oh, I've always thought about moving the trampoline over there. And he took that apart yesterday.

It didn't move. I'm like, wow. Oh, my God. Find some more things. Great. But then I'm like, good. but then last night I was like, is this just showing how you society? I was going to say good on you for not feeling emasculated, but there it is.

I'm like, this is the best thing in the world. It means like, she should have married her brother. I'm from master then, that's fine. Yeah, so at first a couple of days I'm like, this is incredible, this is the best thing ever. And then last night I was like, oh, this is not showing me in a good life. He's out of offering you. This is really like, amazing. Doing all these things and don't get me wrong, don't stop.

If you hear this, Hamish, please don't stop. Keep going. It's amazing. But same time, I'm like, oh, he is just nailing all these things that I can't do. That's okay. I probably meant to have done that. Like, I could have tried to put the kit set, the little shed together, but... He's got costumes to wear, bro?

Yeah, no. Dude, don't worry about those gender roles. How often does Hamish come out of interest? Yeah, once or twice a year, maybe. Oh, that's good? Yeah, just let him pile up for Hamish. Yeah, once year, maybe, for we're lucky, you might come over once a year. So, yeah, right.

So all these things are great. we've got brother-in-laws on both sides of the family who are exactly the same like super handy to the point where my brother-in-law bought my husband like some tools for Christmas being like a wee hint you can do it oh like come on buddy yeah yeah let's ask me if you do have this thing and I'm like I don't know I don't know is there a hacksaw in the garage I'm like I don't know what's the what's is the hacksaw again I've got an ATM costume She's got a hole in it, or is it the, like, thick one?

I'm like, talk to Amanda, Amanda's, you know, my wife, she's more better at those things than I am, so she can deal with that. So, yeah, so thank you to Hamish, but also, same time. If anything, you should be asking why Amanda hasn't sorted it out before now. Yeah, you're right, Megan, you're right. Get off the couch with your sawback and buddy do and trampoline. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast, the Hits. The Farmers Santa Parade is on this Sunday, and, well, Megan, we thought there's a lot of people on stilts that take part in the parade. the many floats and you've said you've often told us how great you are on stilts and so we

thought well I don't know if I said I was great I said I can I can do it you went to clown school didn't you yeah and then once you graduated clown school you could do stilt walking so I was like yeah but you're just saying something terrible happened at the Nelson Santa parade when you were in your stilt era yeah I was still walking in the parade and one of the clowns on those stupid little bikes to thought it would be cool to like go between my legs but didn't like tell me, didn't clear at first, went between my legs from behind and... You've always got to, you know, it's got to be

a consensual, can I get in between your legs? You've got to ask the question, don't you? He snuck up on me from behind. Again. You went through my concedual. Do you mind if I sneak up you? Went between my legs and nearly knocked me over in front of everyone. So I have had like a near miss.

You're like, you're bloody clown. I know. And I wanted to, but I couldn't abuse them in front of thousands of people. So I just tried to collect myself. So that was You know, that's what can go wrong in the parade. You know, everyone's getting swept up in the showmanship, aren't they? The clowns trying to put on a show for people. So hopefully it'll go right as you try and walk 1.6Ks as part of the Farmers Santa Parade in costume.

But, you know, it can go wrong as before. So, well, that's what we thought today? Let's get the worst-case scenario stories out of the way. Yeah. Oh, 800 of the hits. 4-48-7. You say this is to make me feel better. You know, what have you done in a public performance that maybe has gone slightly wrong?

Yeah, this can inspire you to not get, you know, to not have it full by the way, side as much as these stories, it'll come through. You know, these could be wedding speeches that have gone wrong, school plays that have gone wrong, Ben, a school performance that went wrong. I've talked about this many times, so I won't bore you with the details, but don't like fireworks inside, inside the school gym if you're doing a Michael Jackson dance routine, because fireworks and a gym floor, they don't go well together. No.

I was just trying to bring some pyrotechnics, some Rasmataz showmanship. Like I there was a fire extinguisher. Yes, and it really did cause a little bit of damage, and particularly to my credibility as well. So, yeah, that's it. No fireworks weren't being a touching. Yeah, just twillard. Did you know the guards? I just started with Thriller, then I got into Billy Jean.

I'd sort of made it together on the cassette tape. Yeah. It'd be like a Michael Jackson tribute show that goes around the regions, you know. Exactly. July or something. Exactly. So no fireworks, that's from me. Okay.

Yeah, a friend she was having her hands do, Laura, who we know. And she was like, I don't want any sort of, you know, again, no one taking off their clothes. So I just want to have a nice time with my friend. And so her other mate, he was in Dunedin, and he thought it would be a funny thing to order a male stripper. So he just turned up at the door. And the guy, the poor fella's taking off his clothes, and they can't stop laughing because they realize how sunburnt he is.

He's terribly burnt by the sun. And all they could think about was like rubbing alivere gel on his back. Or he's like taking off a shirt like. I imagine as, you know, sort of in your magic. Mike roll, this guy, let's say Magic Murray, he's the last singer stripper wants, for their confidence, is laughter. No, it's not a comedy show.

Yeah. And I don't even think he even got to the end of the routine. And then he kind of just, like, packed up his clothes and left. And then he was sadly sitting on the swing in the playground across the road afterwards, waiting for an Uber sort of swinging back in front. I hope he'd put his shirt back on. He doesn't need

any more son. No more son. No more son. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The hits. Megan, it's going to be walking on stilts at the Farmer Santa Parade on Sunday in front of hundreds of thousands of people. The stilts, they're made for walking. Innocent people. These stilts are made for walking.

That's just what they'll do. On Sunday, these stilts are going to walk all over you. Hopefully not walking all over any kids or anything out and about. Innocent bystanders. Producer Troy, that's you singing that. Mate. Yeah, sounds like Johnny Cash. A-I.

And Megan just saying yesterday, because you got the stilts on yesterday in the studio, we've got that footage if you want to see it at the hits breakfast on social media. You're really handy on them, but you're just saying you're out of, you haven't done it in so long, the muscles are out of whack. Yeah, it's different muscles. And I've been doing hill climbs and stuff on treadmill to try and get in, you know, get the muscles up to speed. But it's different muscles.

The only way you can really, you know, train them is to be up on the sills. What I didn't factor in with stilting too is, you know, obvious when you think about it is you can't stand still. You've got a hobble back and forth side to side, like you're impatiently waiting for a theme park ride or something. And I think it is easier to walk rather than try and stay on one spot because then you're literally going league to league to lead to lead. How are you feeling? How's the confidence? At first, when legitimate questions came through, like, can you walk one person?

You're like throwing around all sorts of swears. Of course I can't offend it. You know, scoffing. And now you're like, oh, I don't know. Well, because yesterday wasn't a good gauge. I was in the studio. I was trying not to fall over the desk. I was trying to avoid the lights and the cameras.

So I need to go for like a walk Okay, well maybe we'll do that before Well let's do that before the weekend Okay, but what could go wrong in a public performance Someone texted and said I fainted in a school Christmas production That's pretty bad I had a premonition I fainted on the stilts

Like if I got really hot I mean great Just timber Great for the radio show Terrible for ACC Now we also There was a school principal that phoned through once And Harold the draft

You know the life Was it the Life Trust draft? goes around schools and they said to the principal oh you be the draught and what the principal he was like it was so hot in there

he was at school assembly and it was a long assembly and he eventually fainted and he said the last thing the last thing he can remember hearing is one of the kids going

Harold's dead Harold's dead and they'd like on him pull him off by his feet slide him off the stage traumatizing for the kids They couldn't take it off of on stage. No, no, they don't want to ruin the illusion, right?

Oh, no. Harold said, you know, the principal didn't have to take the hit on that. Mr. Smith is Harold? Yeah, poor Harold. Now, producer Troy, you're in with us. Not only can you sing, pretty good Johnny Cash, but you could also play the... You're a man of many unusual talents, a trumpet, right?

Yeah, I've learnt the trumpet in high school. Yeah. I was tapped to be the next trumpeter of the New Zealand Army band if I wanted to go into the Army. Oh, really? Wow. It was before this performance that were... about to hear. This performance

ended their dream. So this is Anzac Day very prestigious. Now you're one of the most special days. You know, so many people that gave sacrifice for New Zealand and Australia and the wars, right? Yeah, very, very like a serious occasion. What's your role? This is five in the morning. This is this the dawn service. The dawn service. I was

the bugler to play the last post in front of a thousand people at the Lincoln Memorial. And in your defence then what do you want to say? I want to say. I want to that I was practicing in a very warm air-conditioned hall, and then I went out to the frosty cold Canterbury mornings. Okay.

And so what does that do to the bugle? It shrinks the brass. It makes the mouthpiece really cold, and so the pressure and the airflow all gets messed up. And this is what... This is actually produced to draw. This is the result. This is on my mum's Facebook page.

Did she stop filming at that point? Yeah, that's where the video cut off. Oh, no. And I just see all of these like men in uniform just with their heads bowed, just like trying not to laugh. It would be the only type people have laughed during that. Yeah, good luck on Sunday, Megan. We'll get the other speed of how that goes.

John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast, the Hits. Oh, and we're playing our morrow. Briar Carey game and you guys are playing along too. It's great to see somebody texts rolling through people in or out of the game. You just have to avoid listening to Murray Carey's all I want for Christmas for as long as possible. Yeah, I'll 800 of the hits actually are you in or out of the game

would love to hear from you. And producer Troy, you were savagely eliminated through some novelty speakers. Yeah, retrofitted to the front of a Honda Civic, I think. Yeah. I love those setups. Don't know if the law loves the setups, but I appreciate them. People drive down the street blasting it

and they got you out. It has to be Mariah's version, and it can't be sabotage. Now, yesterday we spent a long time talking about what was potentially sabotage. My daughters bought a beer, like a teddy beer from a store, and they put a recorded Mariah Carey's song into the beer. And so when I pushed the poor, they gave me the beer, I pushed the poor, and the song played. And we all like, is that sabotage?

Megan, you and my lawyer represented me. We went through a whole court case. I defended you so fiercely. Half an hour of radio. We came out on top. We won, Ben. I defended you successfully. You're still in the game.

She went to law school to study for the case. You were really good. My daughters were arguing that it wasn't sabotaged. I pressed the bear under my own free will and stuff. But, hey, I was set up. I was set up. And so it was decided, the jury decided that, well, they were a hung jury, but that you would live on.

You'd live to see another day in the Mariah Carey game. Which is great news. Yeah. Well, I've made a confession to make, and that's why producer Troy is back in here for the second time this hour. Too much, too much, Troy, if you asked me. A lot of Troy. Because I walked back in after the court case on Cloud 9.

I was back in the game. Back in the game. It was a good feeling. As soon as the case, finish. As soon as case, I went back into the little room that producer Troy and producer Grace is in. And I had the beer again. I haven't pressed the bear's paw since the first time I pressed it. And I'm like, geez, it's so tempting not to press the poor.

And you were really careful. You're like, don't press the pour around here because you're still in the game. Producer Grace was in there. And I was like, producer Grace, put some headphones on because I'm going to press the bears poor I want to hear it again and so I did Grace put headphones she couldn't hear it I pressed it for because producer Troy

you're out of the game we listened to it together and we had a moment it was nice and then we sat there and then I went I shouldn't have done that because I was just defended you're all and I eliminated myself from the game what a waste of half an hour radio he self-sabotaged himself

but didn't even like I think what was going through here was I think you're prepared to lose the case And so I think you were wanting to hear it. I felt like I was guilty. It's kind of a, it is an OJ situation where he got off, and then eventually it catches up with you. You're eventually having directly after the case.

It's like straight away. It's like you went home and you showed everyone the gloves did fit. Yeah, pretty much. And then I was like, so I'm out of the game. Guys, I'm out of the game. We had a moment we just looked at each other and I went, I shouldn't have done that. And you're like, no, you're out the game now. You're out, mate.

So Megan, you're the only survivor. You're the sole survivor, from the breakfast show. Oh, I've almost won. PJ in the afternoon, of course, and you guys as well are playing right now when everyone is out of the game. Maybe next week, if you can get through to next week sometime, maybe. Who knows? We'll start playing the song here on that.

Shannon's just phoned through. Shannon, how are you? Yeah, not too bad, yourself. Yeah, good, thank you. You heard a bit of a curly question in regards to the Mariah game. Take it away. Yeah, well, we've been talking about self-sabotage and sabotage and that, and I quite like listening to my Christmas music,

so I just push play and listen to Mariah anyway, figuring I'm not out because it's sabotage. He's got a loophole. He's got a loophole. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast, The Hits. We keep saying there's something that could be on your phone, and a lot of people don't actually know that it's there. Yeah, I don't know.

Is it on just one brand of phone? I think it's on Apple phones, as far as I know. I always. So there's a new sort of message. message service so if you call someone who's got an apple phone sometimes you'll be greeted with a friendly welcoming voice that says hello what's you know the purpose of your call and then you're sort of without any preparation chucked into the middle of a sales pitch you're like having to pitch why this person should answer your call it's like an AI answering service yeah yeah

personal assistant uh and you got to be succinct too don't you because you want to do like juicy little teasers as to why they should why they should answer the phone oh i've got some money for you or, you know, something like that. I suppose it's to help stop scammers, maybe. Yeah, they get freaked out and they don't follow through with the call. It feels like when people call you from prison, you get this sort of thing. Do they play your voice? Because if you're a scammer, you could literally just be like, hey, it's mom, I need to talk to you.

This isn't, I don't know, I'm on a different phone. Do we want to test it out? Yeah, we'll call producer Troy's phone. So here we go, this is how it works. Hi, if you record your name and reason for calling, I'll see if this person is available. Hi, it's Jono Ben Amiga here, and geez, we've got some pretty juicy gossip to tell Troy. Probably the juiciest of all the gossip, hey guys? Yeah, it's like so juicy.

Does he want to hear it, though? I don't know. Thanks. Please stay on the line. What do you reckon? Do you reckon he's going to want to hear the juicy gossip? Is this like your first? phone puts you on hold.

Did you guys have some juicy gossip? Did your phone tell you where juicy gossip? What's it say? Yeah, it said hi, it's Johann Meggy and Bin. Yo-Han Meggi and Bin. Yeah, well, that's a juicy gossip for you. I reckon for the show needs a rebrand. Johan Meggy and Bin.

And then what did it say? It said that you've got some juicy gossip and said, what I like to accept the call and I said, well, I want to hear what you got to say. Ben needs help moving this weekend. That's the juicy gossip. And he's gone, he's hung up. He's gone completely.

So what a cold-ass way to get a rejection on the phone call too, isn't it? Yeah. I would rather just leave a voicemail. And if they don't call back, just hope that they, you know, they might be people who don't clear voicemail sort of thing. A little bit of hope left in it. Otherwise, this way you just brutally eliminated from the phone call. I know, well, they definitely know that I've called.

They don't want to talk to me. So we're going to play a little game. Oh, 800 of the hits. the game is you phone us and you just record your pitch as to what you want to talk to us what you talk to I forgot you know it could be

oh I've got the absolute best story ever I lived in the Amazon and was married to a crocodile for four years something like that could be this could be the chance Baycorp needs to get in touch with you oh could be yeah

they've seen you so many letters John I so many texts too lately oh text now and unknown numbers I know it's there but I'm not asking I'm not getting a scam Well, they could call us up right now, so they can leave us a message with producer Troy and I'm 800 The Hits.

John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast, The Hits. There's a new system on a few phones that are out there now where you kind of have to pitch your case to talk to the person before you're actually allowed through to be answered. We tried it on Troy's phone, our producer. Hi, if you record your name and reason for calling, I'll see if this person is available. And then you have to pitch your case,

and then they get a message. and then they decide whether they want to talk to you or not. It's a great way to avoid people, isn't it? Yeah, it really brutal way to end a phone call. So, Oh, 800 the Hats is our phone number. We put it out there before, and we got producer Troy to record some people, some messages of people that wanted to talk to us. We've got a Dilma tea advent calendar to give away to the person that makes it on the air,

making the world a bit of tea. Do try it, and we're going to listen to the messages right now, but we can only pick one that we want to talk to. So it could be like, hey, John, oh, it's science here. We've got some hair for you. You know, and we'll be like, we'll talk to that person. Talk to that person. Okay, all right, we'll kick it off this one.

This is Rob, apparently. Yeah, good-day, it's Rob, and it's Megan's old flatmate, actually. And, boy, do I have some dirt on her. I want to bring up some, a little bit of gossip about her, actually. Oh, not bad. I like this. Not bad. No, I feel like Megan doesn't like this as much as we do.

That's fine, Rob, but I lived with him, too. I've got dirt just as much dirt. Olga? Hi, I'd like to give it to my gorgeous friends. who always gives more than she has. I guess that's to win the calendar, I guess. Yeah, the Dormartee calendar. That's lovely, isn't it, Christmas Spirit?

Yeah, I see. Brick's phone through? Hello, my name is Brick, and my name is Brick, because my mum named me Prick, because the Brick hit me when I was younger. Oh, jeez. I'm quite, well, do we want to, wow, that's an intriguing story. Love to talk to Brick, Nicole?

Excuse me, sir, if this is Jono, from the Jono and Ben show. I've been quite offended by some of the banter lately, and I'd like you to call me back to deal with the situation. Don't lie off I like that one. No, I don't know if I like that one. That's just personally, I'm in the same category as you with Rob your old flatmate there, Megan, on that one.

Rachel? Hey, guys, my name's Rachel. I drove a Tuktuuk from the South of India all over the north of India. 3,000 to two weeks. It was insane. Drivetu talk to Kutka across India. That's not been.

And Laura. And Lauren's phone. True. Hey, I used to listen to Dono on The Edge, and I'm just following up about a ride that I won, and if I could... Okay, and we won't do that. So, what do you want to go? What are we go? Should we go?

Oh, the Tukes looks quite intriguing. Should we go to Tuk-Took? Yeah. Okay, across India, Tuk-tuk. Rachel, are you there? I am certainly here, yes. You made it through. You made it through.

There's a lot of great calls of what we really wanted to go to. But that's a little wild thing you did. Oh, it was so cool. Honestly, it was part of a race. There was 87 teams across the world, and you're a team of three. So it was me and two others. And, yeah, you just drive from the south of India all the way to the north, and you have two weeks to get there.

And you don't have any maps. You just have to. Oh, my God. Where do you stay? Where do you stay? Well, you don't really know how far you're going to get each day because your Tuk-Took breaks down, you run out of gas. The petrol gauge doesn't.

work so you have to have gas tanks in the back you took took your bags are on the roof and we saw on the first day we'll try and aim for 200Ks and we only got 80Ks in so you don't know where you're going to end up so you just find the next town and just find accommodation and look for some food and carry on the next day. Yeah someone who likes to plan

this is my worst nightmare. You would hate to this competition. It's like what we're not we we don't know but hey what a wild thing to do what a cool thing to do. When did you come in the race if there was like 80 Well, we finished, which is the main thing. Not everyone finished. Right.

It's just such a cool way to see the country. Like in the south, it was all just, you know, beaches and elephants, and then the furthest out north you go, it's just deserts and elephants, sorry, camels. It was just such a cool contrast. Wow, and what's the craziest thing you saw on a Took-Took driving all the way across India? Well, we did have to get our Tuk-Took-Weldwood back together. So some locals, they didn't have any gloves on, they were bare feet. and they just needed to weld our

took-took back together and they didn't have any safety gear and they just were so helpful and we tried to get them cash and they were like no no no we can't take cash so everyone was just so lovely and we gave them a box of biscuits and they were really thankful for that oh what a beautiful story Jono Ben and Megan

the podcast The Hits Now all three of us we've got dogs and a lot of people own dogs and yeah dogs but they bring so much joy don't they to a household to a family and there's a few things though that

dogs bring a lot of awkwardness too. A big one to, when I take Milo to get his hair cut, the groomers, and the guy's like, would you like me to milk the glands? And I'm like... Oh, do they do that at your groomers? And I was like, what, the gland glands? He's like, yeah, the glands. The anal glands.

Do you do that with your fingers? He's like, yep. And I was like, the same fingers you've just shaking my hand with it. So that's an awkward bit. And then the second one is, when you're out walking the dog, the interaction with dogs and other dog owners okay so inevitably all dogs just want to sniff every single part

inspect every part of the other dog's body and there's sort of three moments of interaction you have with a dog owner sometimes you're both standing there and you're like dogs eh yeah and then that's the end of that one next one is how old you're like three and then you feel like you need to go

how old you're one They're like three and you're like, oh, yeah. And then you just continue to watch some stuff. And then the third one is you just stand there in dead silence. No one sees anything. And you're just watching both these dogs who are hammer and tongs at each other's rare ends with their noses. And then you just go in your way.

You're like, what is that interaction? Yeah. Well, you know, my dog is a mounter, shall we say. Oh, what of any other dog? And people, look, just everyone. So that's something, yeah. So that's even worse. Do you do that in silence or that's something you need to go?

Oh, he's a mounted. I'm like, oh, sorry. And I try and pull him away. But, like, he does it to big dogs. He's only little and he does it to like huskies and stuff. Yeah, you never know. I give him the dog owner's a wide berth now because even my dog's quite big. But I think small dogs will kind of sometimes go at him.

He's a big dofuss anyway. So I'm like, oh, it's just better to avoid. Yeah. Not let them go. You know, you just kind of like, but just because I, you never know how the dogs are going to come up. Leo would definitely try and mount your dog. Yeah. Or even like, you know, whoa, whoa, whoa.

dogs can come really cut yeah out of the mounter hey Ben's nickname around the office she's mounting again oh excuse him excuse him but yeah keep an eye out that for that

well just have let's just have a universal thing a little bit of interaction dog park's a great thing just let them go loose and then they can go and sniff all the things that they want to sniff and mount all the things

everyone stand awkwardly apart which was you're wrong you're like definitely the one mounting in the other one but I'm not going to bit it you're like I don't know. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. There's something going on to do with a present for you. Look, I did tell you this in confidence, but I also, my husband's not listening to the radio right now.

So I'm telling everyone in confidence, do not tell my husband, okay? This is just between us. This is a show secret here. Okay, and it's a dirty dark secret too. It's not. Watching this as a husband, watching this play out, I'm like, what other stuff's happening to me? Dude, I'm just leading the horse to water and offering him a beverage. That's all we're doing.

So I have spotted a handbag for Christmas. Another one? It's a different, I don't have one this colour. It's a different one. It's a different one to the other 30. I don't have a different one this colour. And I know that I would get that response from him if I straight up said, babes, I want this handbag.

He'd be like, you don't need another handbag. So what I've done. Same with your shoes like that with your costumes, you know? Don't need another costume? you're right yeah so i thought maybe i could enlist producer grace to help me um so i drafted up a message i asked for her permission first drafted up a message in a way that i thought she would talk there was lots of divas and sleigh and read out the message no capital letters the message says hey king i don't know if you have got making anything for x-miss but she won't

stf you she had to change i had to change it i did that in because it fell like me bit of an acronym about this bag. Do you know what that is? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that's how I say, uh-huh. I yeah, yeah, yeah. I found it on, I found it. So here's the link anyway, Diva.

And you can do you. So I have a great day. So Megan, Megan drafted that test. She was the author of that text. And you've just added a little personal stuff. And you're going to send that to Andrew. She sent it. I've sent it.

I've sent it. And what does he said back? Andrew said, cute bag. I might just get this for myself and wear it around him. He said, aha, thanks for the heads up. Megan, dot, dot, dot, I mean, Grace.

Oh! So he called it out. Wow. He could see it. Good on you, Andrew. Oh, good on you. He snuffed it out. Jesus.

He's not getting played. And can I cast your mind back to, what was it? Did you message him, Ben? No, I didn't know. I didn't, no. How did he sniff that out? I think it was the link. I think it was sending him the direct link was a bit shady.

Yeah, it was too much. You should have a screenshot of the bag or something. Oh, yeah. I'll just cast your mind back to what. Probably less than 24 hours ago, actually, Megan. People put so much on the presents. And, like, if you get a present, it's nice. But, like, hanging out with your family

and, like, doing the special things is what Christmas is actually about. Yeah, sure. I don't get presents from any of my family. Okay? The only person I get presents from my husband. That's you on the radio. The only person I get presents from it is my husband.

So I want to make sure it's something good. Send Andrew that link as to that little bit of audio. I'll be sitting in that to him. Now, okay? Aye, yeah, yeah, yeah. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast, The Hits. Meeting Josh Thompson is on tour with seven days at the moment and he joins us in the studio. Great to have you here.

Hello, oh, thank you. Great to have you here. It feels like the interview that we've been waiting for, you know, waiting for, it's like a strange thing. It's just like, it's coming soon, it's coming soon. Highly anticipated. Yeah, yeah, well, here I am. What a joy for everybody to see me. I had faith in you the whole time.

Did you? Did you, Megan? Now, because we've got a bit of a rich history, Josh, of, you know, book you to come on the show and then you forgetting that you need to come on the show. Many times, you know, we've sort of phoned you and you've been like, oh, I've had an appointment I don't even need to be at right now. Waiting in your car for something, you're like, I'm going to get a schedule, but you've forgotten about us.

Yeah, so what happened last time? I saw you like out there in the foyer last time before and then you walked into the lift. I was like, oh, maybe he's going to get something and you didn't come back. Yeah, I mean, I'm kind of dropping some big hints. So I wanted you to see what you could get, and then I wanted to take it away from you. So what we did is we place bets this morning. We do.

We want to place like an hour ago. Okay. This is what we thought. I think this time I have faith in Josh. I think he will turn up. I'm going to go. It's going to go down like last time where he comes to the building

and then he leaves. It's like when I go to the pantry, I'm like, what did I go in here for? One of those moments. Bless Josh, I don't think he's going to do it. I think his track record is his track record for a reason. Wow.

go. Skathing. But is it undeserved? I mean, wow. You set the bar low so then we're like, oh my God, Josh. I mean, you're really backpedaling now. Mindy, you had come off 0 from 3. That's right, that's right. I will say, I tried to come an hour early, and I arrived on time.

Oh, good time, did you? Yeah, like a couple months early. You were here a couple months early. I'll give you that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was quite weird. I didn't know what to do. And someone said,

take a seat and I went, why? Why don't I ever sit here? This never happened to me before. Just feel relaxed. So how is it on the 7th Day store? Because we have talked to some of the fellow comedians and they're like sometimes you're one of the best people to tour with

but also sometimes, you know, like a little behind the schedule, I guess. Oh, me? No, no, who you're talking to Paul? Yeah. Okay, most people get in the van and are ready to go at 10 o'clock. Whereas I like to ride a full run of terror down the stairs of the hotel. There's a lot of other people that don't do things that don't factor into getting out of a hotel. Other people taking their time in the lift, not closing the door, like, just get in, get in the left, press the closey button thing.

And then people like, oh, I think I got some fizzy water. I'm like, oh, I ate all this lollies, is that what you want? Is that what you want? So I'm just throwing money at them, and then I'm running to the thing. And then trying to seem quite cool, but I'm quite sweaty. But yeah, I'm pretty just a chilled out guy. Yeah, well, how was the tour being, you know, traveling around the country? Still a chance for people to jump on board.

The shows have been so much fun. The crowds have been so great. And we're pushing quite a heavy load of lulls. Too many lulls are you saying for comedy? Yeah, right. My back is sore from the lulls. But yeah, it's really funny. And it's such a great way to see, like,

because it's like a smorgasbord. Because we all do, like, stand up in the first half. So you get a little chunk of everybody. And if you don't like somebody, they'll be gone in like five minutes. So then you can just wait for the next person. Have you been dealing with hecklers on this tour? Nice hecklers. Oh, that's cool.

Yeah. Nice people. people repeating what I've said, which is, um... Weird? Like, oh, was it a big hat? What? A big hat? Yeah, it's a big hat.

Cool. I've got to just for clarification. I've got to keep going now. This is nice. Nothing like a supportive heckler probably throws you off even more. Yeah, yeah. One time I had a, um, somebody who was really into it and that they were like, uh-huh.

The whole time I'm like, oh, no. And they were like, oh. no what's going to happen which is nice but it's kind of hard to tell a story with somebody screaming out the whole time but you've got to be careful as well because sometimes people make noises and you can't make fun of somebody because you're not sure where that noise is coming from so people are noise makers and you're like oh that's you're on board yeah yeah so it's a difficult balance have you had some losses in that uh yeah yeah one time i went ah who made that noise and then some

I remember it was somebody who involuntarily made a lot of noise oh wow you keep going then I think I can you had that problem too at a show

oh did he yeah got Gail Williams went along to it in Australia and he was like I'm not playing this next song till everybody in the stadium is on their feet standing up

and there was like a couple of people who words singles are out too you too you're holding up the whole concert till you stand up they're in wheelchair oh my god oh my goodness

yeah wow Wow, wow. So you haven't had one of those moments. No, but I'll look forward to it. I'll try it next time. I'll see what happens. We're not doing any more jokes. We'll get around in here.

But everyone's welcome. Everybody's welcome. Josh Thompson, seven days. You can go along and see them this weekend. Two shows left. Hamilton Christchurch. Yes. And you can go to seven days.com.com.

All the two of a day. John O'Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hits. Playing the Mariah Carey game, trying to avoid listening to Mariah Carey's all I want for Christmas for as long as possible. You are playing along as well.

You are playing along as well. well and if you hear it you are out of the game yeah it needs to be the original version the actual maria version not the not the heavy metal version which we stumbled across which is sweet and scary at the same time there's game that kids play well my kids play at school too very similar too very similar vibes the game that's called the game now by mentioning the game i've just got a whole lot of people out of the game and that gets the wrath it's basically if you think about the game you're out of the game and then you have to see from now how long you can go before you think about the game again or someone brings up the game and then

you're out of the game just the game it's just the game it's just the game yeah but as soon as they bring it up with the kids I'm like if you thought about the game they're like dad it's been like four months I haven't thought about the game oh so it's just an honesty policy again it's just like yeah soon as you think about it so right now I'll be offending a lot of people by saying it who's who's playing the game oh anyone that wants to play the game you can't play the game as well and soon as you think about the game next you're out of the game I can't stop thinking about the game I'm not even I can't stop thinking about it. Yeah, that's the thing.

Yeah, but the Rykeri game is what we're playing at the moment, and we wanted to know people, are you in or are you out? Tina, what up? What up? I am out. Oh, no. Talk to us, Tina. It happened yesterday morning.

I'm still pretty upset about it. I thought I was pretty safe because I work remotely from home, but I do go and help get my friends' children off to school in the mornings and they're nine and six, and I was sitting with them yesterday, getting ready to do their hair, which we normally put K-pop Demon Hunters on for, and the nine-year-olds started singing it. Just singing it?

Yeah, she started singing the Mariah Carey song. Oh, no, that's not the original recording. She wasn't playing it? No, she was singing it. Oh, you're okay. You're still in. I'm okay? The T's and Cs around the game says you have to listen to Moriah Carey's version.

If you hear any of Mariah Carey's version, you're out of the game. But anything else, that's fine. That's technically a cover. Yeah, you're right. you're safe as houses Tina you're still in the game mate you made my day and hopefully that means I'll win lotto neat it's going to happen that's pretty nice that you go around to your friends and help her get the kids already yeah do that every morning

I do I've done it for a number of years now because I work for an Australian company and I have to do a false start to the day to like get that urgency going oh right you because you actually probably don't start to 11 yeah I see so it's just you so you've just inserted yourself until your friend's morning to get your day going. It's so good. Love your work.

I've made this awkward. Hey, good on you, Tina. Have a great day. Love you. God. God, shut up. You've really made that awkward day. You love it.

Shut up, Jono. Okay, all right. Producer Troy, help us out of this one day. You're out of the game. We also love you as well, producer Troy, if you're wondering. I can't focus now. Whatever to you, Troy. I love you, Troy.

Yeah, I got out last week. thanks to a lovely family in our neighbourhood who have speakers on the outside of their car I like those ones on the roof yep

and they were just feeling very festive and drove down our street our cul-de-sac blasting Mariah Carey monster they just do a little loop when they get to the end

yeah and I was just sitting in the lounge and I just heard it faintly and coming closer and closer and then fading out and out and out do they know you live there do you know them

maybe it was sabotage a lot of the times they're playing like Celine Dion on, hey, my heart will go on and stuff. Usually after some sort of Samoan rugby game as well, they love to blast So you're out, geez.

What an epic way to get out, though. It was strange, it was very strange. It kind of can't be mad at that. I wanted to go outside and shake my fist. You, buddy, kids get out of the neighbourhood. Slow down! It feels a bit weird doing it to all our work. Yeah, true.

4487 is our text, please tell us if you're in or out of the game, I would love to hear from you this morning. Something Christmas related, though. I mentioned the game again. No, I'm thinking about the game. Oh, no, don't talk. Now, you're out of the game. You just got back into the game.

John O'Benn and Megan, the podcast. Ben, boys, managed to stay in it after a pretty high and intense legal battle between you and your daughters yesterday. Yeah, it was very intense on the radio, but I've got a wee confession to make after 8.30 this morning, so we'll get to that later. Okay. Now, you're representing him too late.

Yeah, you're not going to like this. You're not going to like this. Megan, is my legal team. I'll get a lot of this. Please, if you could just stop talking, incriminating yourself. I don't know how you're going to support me on this one. Oh, no. You thought O.J. Simpson was bad.

Listen, I had a list of sort of stuff that I had to do in the handy category. It's been piling up. One was, you know, your shower hose. I don't even know what you call it. You know where the head of your shower is. Yeah, and there's a hose. Is that what you call it? Yeah.

Anyway, it started leaking from where it, you know, it joins to the top of the shower here. It's been going on for weeks. Jennifer, my wife, says, like, can you just get a new hose? We just, you know, we just need a titan? Gave that a go, no, it doesn't. So I imagine the tubing inside is split for some description. Anyway, had to go to Bunnings and do this. And before I went, just by pure coincidence, had to change a car tire yesterday.

Wow, look at you. Probably the handiest day I've ever had in my existence. but so what ended up was a lot of oil on my hands. You know, even I tried to rub it off and stuff, but it was still quite oily, greasy, working hands. You know, hands that do proper, functional things. And so I went into Bunnings and I handed over the hose, a guy behind the counter,

so you've been doing some work today. I was like, oh, I have. So then I'm like, Are you flirting with me? Yeah, I'm like, maybe every time I go into Bunnings, just need to rub the tire grease on your hands And you're not a plan. You earn instant

create in the hardware store. Yeah. What did you get the other week? They thought you were something? Oh, that was that right. That was when I took in there, one of the leaf blower or leaf sucker things that wasn't working. And the guy said, are you a landscaper? I was like, maybe it was flirting with me because I was like, oh, clearly I'm not a landscaper.

But then you have that moment like, don't want to live this live? Just for a moment? Yeah, just for a moment and feel like I'm handy for some, yeah. They're like, no, I'm getting it fixed for my wife. Yeah. I really should know how to do this. but I know, yeah. Maybe it's a new initiative from the Bunnings management

who said, you know, anyone who walks and looks nervous out of place, make it feel at home. Give them a compliment, make them feel part of the team. Still haven't put the hose on them. Main thing is I got it and I got a compliment.