Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Jono is lying to his son!

Episode Date: May 27, 2024

ON THE SHOW TODAY Jonos parents weird vacation destination... Things you can say in the bedroom and... In a Hardware store DM: My friends getting fired! Ben makes his wife a card Chat GPT makes dinner with your last ingredients Who's the people pleaser Our comfort series Check us out! Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono and Ben Instagram: TheHitsBreakfastSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Thanks to Challenge, putting the service back into service stations. Last night you started something, Margarita Mondays. Yeah, we need to do this every week I think. Margarita Mondays, well that's a way to steam off the week at the start line. How was it? It was good. My husband was like, do you want a margarita? I was like, yes I do. It kind of makes Monday something to look forward to, doesn't it? Yeah. He even salted the rim of the glass.

I was like, ayo. Yeah, nice. Salt in the rim. Salt in the rim. Tequila Tuesdays tonight, is it? What's happening tonight? Yeah, yeah. It's Wednesday.

What do I call it? Whip your whistle Wednesday. Thursday. Thirsty Thursday. Thirsty Thursday, yeah. Friday. Friday is just Friday night. Sunday normal

and then Sunday you need something else but that's right all of a sudden if you just theme each day it makes it more acceptable doesn't it it does

I mean Tucker Tuesdays are nice to twist the Tuesday but Margarita Mondays yeah well while you were doing Margarita Mondays

last night my parents were on on vacation where are they going well let me tell you one night of vacation it was their anniversary and I said what do you want on vacation. Where are they going? Well, let me tell you. One night of vacation,

it was their anniversary and I said, what do you want for your anniversary? And they said, oh, we'd love a night away. And I said, well, you know, you're in Christchurch, where do you want to go? And they said,

we would love to stay at the airport. And I was like, okay. What? Unusual location. At the Novotel, the Christchurch. Oh, right. Not like just the flight's delayed and you've got to sleep on one of those uncomfortable chairs. Like that episode of Kath and Kim.

And so I booked them a night and they went and stayed at the airport. Which is, look, there's my dad there. He's in the room. There's a big bloody Emirates plane behind him outside the window. And that was their vacation. And I'm like, have they cracked holidays? Where you get the excitement of going to the airport. outside the window, and that was their vacation. And I'm like, have they cracked holidays, where you get the excitement of going to the airport,

you don't have that niggly stuck on a plane part, and then you leave the next day. It's great that they enjoy it. I'd still probably prefer to go somewhere. Like, you know, that would be great. No friends of ours have stayed the night. They had a really early flight, so they started their holiday holiday the night before went to the airport and stayed in a hotel and then went on holiday

don't ever worry about that I feel like that hotel where you can literally see the planes out the window you only stay there if you're in transit yeah

I imagine they were asked a lot of times like where are you going and they're like well just 15 minutes back that way at the end of it all this was an unusual

unusual location but maybe maybe they've cracked it I haven't done a night at an airport hotel just for vacation purposes no but it's there I'm sure it's lovely

shopping you go into the airport you know if you hate paying too little for sandwiches you can pay triple the price for a sandwich in the airport

I guess there would be a restaurant at the hotel wouldn't there but you could go in and peruse the gift shops but there's no restaurant at any hotel you know

the world is your oyster. Do they like plane watching or something? Planes swatting out the window? Dad used to work on planes. Right. But I wouldn't say he's like an enthusiast of any. I would just say, that's what you do. That's what I do.

That's what you do. What anniversary is it? What wedding anniversary is it? Oh, they're into their 30s. Yeah, many years. But hey, I hope they had a wonderful night. It feels like that window too. You're very exposed to the passengers on the plane

because they're just on the tarmac. They can see right into your hotel window. Yeah. You're very visible. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. A bit of a chilly cold one for a lot of us around the country right now. But we're going to warm things up with some clickbait headlines. Megan tells us three actual headlines from the internet, and we only get to click on

one to get to find out what the real story is. First headline, Megan. Clickbait headlines. Madonna fan earns a world record. Okay. That is headline number one. A fan. So not Madonna.

A fan of Madonna earns it. Okay. I'm imagining for attending The most amount of Madonna concerts No Most amount of cone bras owned No Okay

Okay Most amount of time Listening to Madonna No Sexiest grandma No Okay Alright well okay

She would be out there As one of the sexiest grandmas Madonna Yeah Surely some of the grandkids Come over and be like, grandma. Also because how old's her boyfriend? He's pretty young, isn't he?

In his 20s? Yeah. She's a G-string, it's a grandma string. Yeah. It's mad. Okay, so we might click on that one because that's tempted me. What's the other one? Second one is Thai town is locking up their monkeys.

Okay, why would they? Well, I guess the monkey. Yeah, they're getting attacked. They're getting all vicious and fed food they shouldn't be eating by the tourists. Have we summed that one up? Maybe. Don't need to click on that.

Okay, so we might not click on that one. The third one? Three little piggies yoga. Three little piggies yoga? Yeah. So was that just doing yoga with pigs? Maybe. Okay. So we haven't been yoga with pigs? Maybe. Okay.

So we haven't been baited. We haven't nibbled on the last 10. It is cute. It is cute. No, don't get me wrong. Let's go Madonna. Yeah, I want to know. All right.

All right. So this Madonna fan has earned. Do you want to make any last minute guesses? So we've done. How many did you want? I don't know. I was just double checking before I told you. We did a weird grandma G-string tangent.

We've got no more gear. So this fan has earned a world record with 18 tattoos of her. So she has got the world record for the most tattoos of the same musician on her body. Taking in second place was a woman by the name of Nikki who has 15 tattoos of Eminem. Wow. So these are all portraits, are they? Yeah. All over.

18 Madonna tattoos. Get a look at this. She was going to be in a music video with Madonna. She wanted fans who had tattoos of her. And then Madonna went, I think maybe I'll just get a restraining order. No, this was when she had the first one done, but it was only half done, so she didn't make the cut. And then she had all 18 done within a six-month period.

Oh, really? Yeah. So she was like, oh, my God, just in case she ever wants me again. Just having a look online now, I've clicked on that article. She's got one of Britney and Madonna, the famous kiss. Oh, they're smooching at the MTV Awards, yeah. All different sort of types of Madonna ones. All over the different decades.

She's got one of her licking a lollipop. That would be early days Madonna, I think it looks like. I used to work with a guy, Lee, at The Rock, who's got a world record for the most amount of Simpsons tattoos. Really? So many. It's really cool. Is it just down both arms?

I think so, yeah. It's like all the characters. Amazing. Wow. Is that a Guinness World Record, eh? I think so, yeah. I think he's the official Guinness World Record, eh? I think so, yeah. I think he's the official Guinness World Record. Would you get 18 tattoos of The Rock?

That's a lot. You've got his signature on your back. That's a lot. I mean, I've got two tattoos, a love heart and him signing it. But, you know. I mean, you're really putting your all chips in on The Rock and hoping he has no scandals. Yeah.

If you've got 18 tattoos of him. You know, there'll be a Cosby tattoo out there somewhere. Oh, there probably would be. And no one ever could have imagined. No, not at all. Yeah, you're right. But your 18 feels like quite the commitment. It's a lot.

It's a lot just to get that word right. The Hits. The Jono and Ben Podcast. The most complained about ads ever from New Zealand. There's been a list just been released from the Advertising Standards Authority so this is of all time this is not just recently. Can I thank the Advertising Standards Authority

for releasing a list. As a breakfast radio show we love nothing more than a list. Love it. Thank you. Love it. The cockles of our commercial radio hearts.

Thank you. So the most complained about ad ever in New Zealand was for Hell Pizza. Now that was something they put in letterboxes, direct mail advertisement. They sent out cardboard wallets

containing condoms to homes across the country and said, our pizza for meat lovers. Oh yeah, risky campaign. And they got a lot of complaints, the condoms being sent. Do they go to every household

in New Zealand, those connies? Well, not quite. They sent 170,000 out. That's a lot of condoms. Yeah, and got a whole lot of complaints as well. Number two went to the Open Polytechnic. They had a radio ad, which basically had a wee dig at country line dancers. A whole lot of people complained, and so they apologised.

Whenever you offend a niche community, they come in hard. They're like the Swifties, not that they're niche by any stretch of the imagination. No, I know what you mean. But if we were right now to go on a rant about the guinea pig community yeah and uh thoughts and feelings towards that geez you would feel the wrath so that's what happened there with the open polytech uh third most complained about ad ever in new zealand how pizza again uh they had a billboard uh saying that the there was a limited edition hot cross bunss around Easter time And they said limited time just like Jesus

And Christians complain about that Sexual though, isn't it? Yeah, well it was limited time, yeah, I guess in a lot of ways And they didn't learn from the Connie scandal, did they, Hell Pizza? But in a lot of ways I think Hell Pizza, they embraced that It's the thing It's why they're called Hell Pizza, I guess Number four was an antiVaccine, Billboard,

near Middlemore in 2018. I was going to say the COVID commercials. Where do they rank on the most? They didn't get in the top five, but the fifth one was Toyota 1999, this iconic commercial. We all remember this one, right? Easy now, son.

Ooh, bugger. You're bruised. Bugger. Yeah, so the bugger ad. I mean, 1999, I guess bugger was... I thought it was earlier than that. Were we complaining about bugger in 1999? I feel like we tolerate a lot more nowadays, don't we?

Yeah, we've become numb. Numb to words. Like we could say all sorts of wild stuff on this show and probably not get pulled up nowadays. I feel like a lot of effort to complain. Have you ever written in for a complaint? No. No.

You just, I don't know, you just sit in your car and you get all annoyed. But I don't know. People have the internet now just to write comments as well. It's probably a lot easier. Back in 1999, they would have to like get the address write a letter send it in you know we gave away a uh on our radio show back in the day uh very cancelable gave away a ukrainian bride uh to a listener how do you feel about that megan doesn't sit well with me no no human trafficking, like, if everyone's on board, you know. Well, yeah, I mean, she was. She was. Well, at least I think she was.

But no, that boy, boy, that got some complaints. And that was a time where you had to write in. It was just like, wow. It was news. Like, the archbishop was on there going, this has destroyed the sanctity of marriage. Oh, no, we're doing that ourselves. Yeah. Yeah.

But that was, so yeah, that I appreciated the level of commitment to complain. You couldn't just go on Instagram and have a back then. What did, like is that relationship still happening? As far as I know. Yeah, like I don't catch up with him annually or anything, but she did move out there. And like when we say we gave her away,

it's not like we, I went over there and picked her up and brought her back on an Air New Zealand flight. Like it was a process. There's an agency. So he basically just won the... And she signed up with consent. Yeah.

Yeah, okay. Yeah, sure. Sure she did. Okay. But no, he went on a trip over there. He went to the agency and then they meet and they see if they hit it off. And they basically go on speed dates. That's buried at first sight.

Yeah. Except it was a language barrier. It's pretty much buried at first sight. The. Except with, you know, a language barrier. Yes. It's pretty much buried at first sight. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. We do this early in the mornings on a Tuesday because, well, we hope that the boss

won't hear it because it's things you can say in the bedroom and dot, dot, dot. Today, a hardware store. Yes. AKA Jono, Ben and Megan read out questionable internet comments

from our Facebook page. Although if you're strolling through Bunnings or Mitre 10 Mega on any given day, you could hear any of this dialogue and not be... Exactly. So that's what you just need to think. It's clean, family-friendly conversation in a hardware shop. But when said in the bedroom,

obviously it takes on a different meaning. Okay, things you can say in the bedroom and at the hardware store. Megan, want to kick things off? I'm going to need quite a long screw. Love the tone too, love the tone. Very friendly, approachable. Brendan Brink on our Facebook page said, do you have anything to trim a bush?

I don't know if you'd want to use it, but yeah. Have you got anything bigger? Anything bigger that I could use? That's what she said. Did you just chuck it in that flush? I did. And I'm not ashamed. No, it felt good.

I'm not ashamed. It sounded good too. Can you give me a hand? My tool's not really working well. Anna May said on our Facebook page, I'd like to nail that. Things you can say in the bedroom and at the hardware store.

You'll find what you're looking for up in the back aisle. This next one's questionable. I don't know if I'd say there's some bunnies. Well, door hinges? Door hinges? You might want to spray some lube onto that. You'd say CRC.

Yeah, you would. I know. But you know the game we're playing here, Megan. We all know why we're here. You might also want to put a tarp down before you get into it, Megan. There you go. We'll beat it by 15%. I don't even know what that means.

Well, it takes a whole other meaning, doesn't it? Leanne said, where are the ropes and chains? Paul Murch said, jeez, that's a nice set of nuts there. Oh, come on. Said no one ever in either place, bedroom or Bunnings. No, they're not nice looking. No, they're not. Both fronts, you're right.

Renee said on our Facebook page, a lot of people have been down this aisle. I would suggest putting on some safety equipment. I think it's time for the jackhammer. Things you can say in the bedroom and at a hardware store. Yvonne said, you said it was six and a half inches. It's only five the jackhammer. Things you can say in the bedroom and at a hardware store. Yvonne said, you said it was six and a half inches. It's only five and a half.

And finally, you can just chuck that in the back for me, mate. Things you can say in the hardware store. And in the kitchen. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Disney on Ice coming back to Auckland this winter, which will be pretty awesome, August. It's always a lot of fun if you've got young kids

and you want to take them along. It's a really great time out. Yeah, it is. I'm always, there is that little part of you that wants Mickey Mouse to arse over. Not a little part, actually, a huge part of it. Mickey Mouse is generally pretty good, though. TM Megan. Alright, Megan, someone's been slipping into the DMs again.

Yeah, this one is a sad reflection of the times, actually. I'll be interested to see what people think. It's a bit of a sticky situation at work. So, the message reads, Hey team, I'm in a horrible position where I know some sensitive information that affects my good friend I work with.

I don't want to give away too many identifiable details, but I work in upper management at a company and sadly, as with the times, we're going to have to downsize and people are going to lose their jobs. Uh-oh. to anyone else, but she is my friend and I feel obligated as a mate to let her know. In saying that, I also don't want to jeopardise my position given the current climate. Please help me. That's sad.

Firstly, that's sad. It's happening a lot these days. You just feel for everyone in that position. It's not fun at all for anyone. Yeah. You have to be loyal to your friend. I get that. But you also have to be loyal to the company

that pays you a salary to be loyal to your friend, I get that, but you also have to be loyal to the company that pays you a salary to be loyal to them and hold a level of professionalism. Yeah, is that her place to say? You know, like, because it's her job not to say, right? She could take some amateur theatre acting classes and then when the news is out, she can be like, what? I didn't know.

I didn't know any of that. What? That's crazy. Or say, like, she knew some people were going to, but she wasn't privy to who. I don't know. What? That's crazy. Or say like she knew some people were going to, but she wasn't privy to who. I don't know. I did know, but it was out of my hands and I wasn't allowed to say sometimes.

Okay, Megan, you find out Ben and me. We're going to get savagely cut from this radio station. What are you doing, mate? What are you doing? What? I didn't know. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah.

It's a good performance. Yeah. I don't know. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. See, I'll find you a bit later. It was a good performance. Yeah. I don't know. Didn't you say you did one a while ago and you knew information? I did. And then when the news came out, she actually put on a performance with tears. No, the performance involved me. So people thought that my friends were leaving without me.

And so I was like, what? I have no idea. And I cried in the staff meeting. Wow. Oh, Meryl Streep over there. I cried, but I was actually going too. And you put tears on. Yeah, because we were trying to keep it all secret.

Academy Award winning performers. Okay, well, let's help out this person today on Dear Megan that slipped into your DMs. 0800 the hits, 4487. We'll get some help pizza for everyone that does help out. What do you do? Does she tell her friend or does she stay loyal to the company and just keep it quiet? It's horrible either way.

I mean, the friend's going to find out one way or another. And it's not, I feel like it's not her place to say, even though you've got your friend. And is a heads up going to help her that much? Nothing there. I mean, she'll get a jump start on looking for another job, but. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. In the middle of today's Dear Megan.

Dear Megan. So someone has written in to my Instagram with a dilemma. They're a middle management at their workplace, but their workplace is downsizing and they know that their friend they work with is going to lose her job. Does she tell her or does she stay professional and keep it to herself? I'm leaning on the side of having to keep it professional because she's there in her role as an employee. Could she go and put the phrase, you didn't hear it from me, first?

Does that cancel everything out? You didn't hear it from me? Does that help things? She could walk out in a blaze of glory with her friend. If she goes, I go too. Yeah. So I'd say 80% of people probably agree with that stance, but someone has texted in and said, tell the friend.

Speaking from experience, not saying, costs the friendship. It makes a difference in that the person can be a bit calmer and collected. Right. The thing is, though, like. The thing is, when the friend finds out that they've lost their job, she will know that she would have known because she's in upper management. Yeah, but then she can say, surely she can say, I wanted to tell you, but I couldn't.

I agree. Like, you're kind of, if you're a good enough wanted to tell you, but I couldn't. I agree. Like, you're kind of, if you're a good enough friend, you should understand that they can't jeopardise their position. You'd be like, I understand. You couldn't say anything. Like, it sucks. Professional boundaries, baby. Yeah. This life is work.

Here we go. Let's go to the phones. 0800 that hits the telephone number. Where do you sit on this? Well, unfortunately, due to legality, she shouldn't say anything because she's not only going to jeopardise her position, Where do you sit on this? instead of saying you're going to get fired, just say, well, I've heard through the management grapevine that stuff's going to go down, so if I were you, I would mentally prepare for that. Right, so be a bit vague.

Yeah, you're right. It's probably a way to sort of keep your job, in a lot of ways, your job as well as, you know. But then like someone texts in, what if she tells her that and then the friend starts telling everyone at work? And then it turns out to a frenzy. Yeah. It's good advice because I feel like the friend would have to understand

that she couldn't. She would love to have said something, but she couldn't have said something in that situation. But maybe I'm wrong. Callum, where do you stand on this? Are you telling your mates if you're in management and you knew they were about to lose their job? Nah, she's got to keep her mouth shut.

Keep it professional. We've seen things come and go, but work is for life. This job is going to go, so. I've seen that on a mug somewhere. I feel like you got that the other way. Anyway. Oh, Socrates over here. Work is for life.

Is this our boss calling or what is this? We're going to send you out some help. It's such a great call. Now, looking at the texts, collating the feedback, Megan, your advice. Most people would say keep your professional hat on and don't tell her. And I tend to agree. If she's a good enough friend, she will understand that she couldn't tell her. But she can support her just the same afterwards.

Okay, that's the advice. Friends, they come and go, but work is for life. Now, Megan, a couple of days ago, your sickeningly sweet partner, husband, Andrew, brought home a handmade card that he'd made for you. He was at work and he

just wanted to say some sweet things, so he made me a card. And I was like, maybe you should try it because it's nice to get something, you know, handmade with thoughtful words for no reason. Handmade with... Unless he's done something and I don't know about it. Yeah, so that was a lovely gesture.

You went home over the weekend and you did that. You wrote a little poem. I went sort of Shakespeare on it, yeah. Handmade card, lovely poem. You got your daughter to read it to your wife and it might be the first time she said girth. Yeah, I love you with all of the girth of my heart, my big wide heart.

So yeah, it went down about as well as you thought it would go down. We were worried that, you know, we'd give these cards and they'd be like, what is this for? What have you done? Or what do you want to do? Those kind of the thoughts. But your lovely wife, Jen, she didn't say that. No, what is this for? What have you done? Or what do you want to do? Those are kind of the thoughts.

But your lovely wife, Jen, she didn't say that. She didn't say, what have you done? No, but then I'm like, well, I was shoving a phone in her face recording too. So I'm like, I don't know how genuine the reaction was. Like if I had a hidden recorder, what the actual reaction would have been. So you did a lovely poem. Andrew's done a lovely card. I handmade a bit of a card.

So I've got some A4 paper. Red A4 paper I found at home and some yellow writing. And I sort of cut out some letters. I thought I'd go a little bit different. Or like a kidnap victim. Yeah. So I cut out some things. So I'll show you.

So I love you to pieces like this on the thing. And then I cut it to a puzzle. And so she could put it together. That is very creative. And so then I came over and went, okay, here you go. This is for you. And it was, well, Amanda was a little confused by it. I made you something.

What for? I just wanted to make you something. Why? So what did you think? It looks like you've just cut up paper. No, it's a puzzle and you've got to put it together. It seems like hard work. I've made you work for it.

What? I made a card and then I cut it up and then I've created... Have you checked your spelling? Well, I've made it. All right, teacher. She's right. Monday night, having to do a puzzle. And then it took, you know, because I've never made a puzzle before.

It took a long time to work out the pieces and which way they go. It's like doing one of those Woz jigs. Have a listen. That's too many pieces. Look, there's a piece come off. Oh, that's fallen off somewhere. Oh, this is shambles. No, that's a you. That's a you. Are you sure? Yeah, you know, it's definitely a you.

What was the puzzle going to say? So it was going to say I love you to pieces because it was all in different pieces. In different pieces. So you had to put it together. So we finally got there after trying to work out what it says. We finally, I knew what it says, but she was trying to work it out. All right, look, there you go. Look, I'll help you there. No, there it goes.

I want a cup of tea. No. No, there. Oh, Jesus, thank you. Up the wands. It says up the wands. Are we going to the league? No, it doesn't say up the wands.

There you go. And finally, finally, it felt like about half an hour. I was like, why am I doing this? But at the end, we finally got what the card said. Can you read it? There, there, there. You can read it. I love you to places.

To pieces. I love you to pieces. And I was a puzzle, and it was made into pieces. Oh. Cute, eh? It was so cute. I don't know. I'd rather a gold bracelet than some diamond earrings

that's a very good point yeah I mean she was appreciative she said it was probably the nicest thing I'd done but at the same time she was like

I'd rather have had jewelry high concept too high concept I couldn't go I tried to decide and it went too high concept yeah I mean you would have

probably saved a lot of time just going down a Michael Hill what have you got on special Michael exactly I tried to do a puzzle

it didn't quite work out it was a living crisis you know make the puzzle and you know Ben hates the idea and general concept of cards

so to get him to even make a card yeah I was in the bedroom gluing stuff and putting a piece of paper. I'm like, what am I doing? And what a beautiful bonding experience for you two to put that puzzle together.

I was like, jeez, I'm no good at making puzzles. That's for sure. That's really tough. Shout out to all the people that make puzzles around the world. Hey, next year, can we win? They don't get enough shout outs. You never think about how a puzzle is made. Let's acknowledge them this morning. People summed up a thousand pieces. Mine was only about 12.

This is for those heroes. I think it's a machine that just stamps out the pieces. Maybe that's what I do. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. I've done this once before, and it was quite a lot of fun to do. Yeah, ChatGPT, it's the AI. It's like Google on steroids, isn't it? It's like what Dwayne the Rock Johnson is to the normal body,

this is to Google. It really is advanced, and as the name suggests, and basically it can solve any problems. You just type in anything, and it'll answer your question. If you want a 5,000-word essay on the revolution of Italy. Yeah. Was there a revolution in Italy? I don't know.

It'll tell you. It'll make one up. It'll make one up. It'll make one up, you're right. And we use it to its full potential to come up with dinner options

for you tonight. Three random ingredients from your fridge, pantry. Last week it went really well, have a listen. I've got tofu,

pesto, some up and go, cheese, ketchup, and eggs. Oh, grim. Okay, pesto tofu bake with vanilla up-and-go sauce.

It's an unconventional fusion recipe that combines the earthy flavours of tofu pesto with a creamy and slightly sweet vanilla sauce. I have mushrooms that look like they'll need to go tonight. I have a cottage cheese. Oh, okay. I have a pear. Okay. I have a cottage cheese. Ooh, okay. I have a pear. Okay. I have couscous. Ooh, okay.

It's making a mushroom cottage cheese and pear couscous salad. Ooh. Just basically saying chuck everything in a bowl and good luck with that one. So yeah, 0800, just name three random ingredients. We'll try and design dinner for you tonight. Can I have a crack, Megan?

I'm just trying to think of what I've got in the pantry because I do need to go to the supermarkets. If you can put it off, though. Well, yeah, I've got some penne pasta in the pantry. I've got a cucumber. I know that it's in there. And I've got some sausages, one pack of sausages. Is there anything they can do with that?

Or am I going to the supermarket tonight? Okay. How about a penne pasta salad with grilled sausage and cucumber? Wait, are they grilling the cucumber? It feels like the salad's just the backup option. Yeah, yeah. Salad on the side or something? Sausage on the side, yeah.

They do a great job of making everything sound like a Michelin star restaurant. Okay, here's one for you. I've got some overly frozen vanilla ice cream. Oh yeah. Okay. Some ravioli and a stapler. Jonathan.

What does it come up with? Let's see how far we can push this chat. Well, you know your bread. Take out the stapler. He always loves white bread. Put white bread in there, okay? So what?

Vanilla ice cream, white bread. Yeah. Ravioli and a stapler if you're feeling fun. All right, here we go. How about vanilla ice cream ravioli sandwiches?

It combines the sweetness of vanilla ice cream with the softness of white bread and the surprise element of ravioli. How about no? All right, let's go to the phones. Kirsten, you're on. Welcome to chat. G-P-T-T-E-A. Works better written down, but's go to the phones. Kirsten, you're on. Welcome to chat. G-P-T-T-E-A. Works better written down, but you give us the ingredients.

Okay, I'm probably being too easy, but rice. Yep. Rice. Coconut cream and raisins. Rice, coconut cream. It feels like you can do something in that. Yeah, it does actually. All right, here's what we've got.

We are looking at an aromatic coconut rice pudding. Oh, with raisins. Not a salad for once. Yeah. A rice pudding would be quite good, wouldn't it? It does actually sound quite legit with toasted coconut flakes on top. I mean, it's not dinner, it's more dessert. Why don't we text that one back to her?

I'll eat it for dinner. And you can text us tomorrow with the feedback on that one, Kirsten. We'll take one more. Carol, you're on chat GPT, designing dinner with minimal ingredients, thanks to AI. OK, I've got cheese, akamakama, tomatoes and chilli sauce. What, akamakama?

Yeah. What's akamakama? It's like a pumpkin. Oh, OK. I feel like I'm going to get broadcasting standards any time I say akamakama. Should I write pumpkin? Yeah, a pumpkin. Oh, okay. I feel like I'm going to get broadcasting standards complaints every time I say come a-come-a. Should I write pumpkin? Yeah, write pumpkin. Alright.

An unusual activity has been detected from my device. Oh, you've been banned. Yeah, I feel like that was going to be a salad situation. Oh, well, you know, are we done? Chat GPT, I'm done with this nonsense, mate. This is not what I was designed for. I think work had banned her from doing it, right? Shall I try again? Carol will never know.

Bit of an issue in the household this morning. For months, I'll give you a backstory. My son Oscar, for about three or four months ago, a hoodie that we purchased him went missing. And we're like, all sorts of wild accusations. You lose everything. We can't trust you to hold on to anything.

Emails were sent to coaches. Have you seen this hoodie? It's been MIA for three or four months. And the investigation's been ongoing. And I, this morning, pulled out my jersey from the cupboard and another jersey fell out from underneath it. Uh-oh. I think you guessed where I'm going.

Yeah. Good guess. And now I'm in the position of, uh-oh, I've been mudslinging three months, but the whole time this hoodie has been hidden away underneath my jersey so a good chance you might have put it away in your cupboard not a good chance there's no now what i need for my friends here from you two is a classy exit strategy here okay because you know the sensible parent in me uh knows that i should come clean and explain and apologize that's not an option all right why That's not an option. No, right.

Why is that not an option? Wipe that off the table. Pride is at stake here. When you get home today and no one's at home, just hide it in his room. So he discovers it. Can you hide it, similar to your situation, hide it in the wrong drawer? And then he's like, oh, look what I found.

Oh, you must have put it in the wrong drawer. It was you the whole time. That is not bad. But I'm glad it's turned up. A bit of gaslighting. It's a bit wrong. Play. Play.

I love it. Do you fold up piles of clothes and then distribute piles of clothes? I do, but when I'm folding, I try and keep them designated to each person's pile. But obviously for some monstrous act in the folding process it happens i slipped up and uh oh yeah geez i um yeah i don't know chances are he's probably even listening to this now in real time and abusing me in the car he might like really um respect you and like the fact that you can be honest and come clean and apologize i don't want that solution okay i don't want problems i want solutions be honest or secretly hide it in his room.

Yeah. Secretly hide it, Megan. But yes, isn't that always a humbling experience? I've been saying some stuff. Put it in the clothing bin and then you... Take this. Oscar, if you're listening, take this as Dad's apology. He was absolutely hounding you for being useless when it was all on him.

What? What? Okay, if he's got a birthday coming up, we re-gift it to him. And we're like, look, we've got your replacement one. Hold on to it for a couple of more months. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

Who came back from the weekend with an incredible fact about your friend. Yeah, well, yeah. Well, firstly, we're talking about the TV show Friends. And to make everyone feel old listening right now, that was around that time. It's been 20 years this month since the final episode of Friends. So that was 20 years since the end of Friends. But we're talking about that.

We're like, my God, the 20 years does not feel like 20 years. So it was the final episode of Friends. That feels like, yeah, the 90s to me feels like yesterday. But 2004 doesn't feel like 20 years ago. We'll talk about that. Old people reminiscing on the radio. They were saying that Friends is kind of like their comfort show. They watch it all the time.

I was like, what do you mean all the time? They said, I'll just put it on. They reckoned, without a word of a lie, they would have watched the entire series at least 20 times. That's every episode from start to finish. And I looked at it, it's 236 eps. They've done the breakdown online.

It would take 80 hours to watch 236 eps from start to finish. But if you skip the theme song, you save about four hours. Yeah, you get the gist of the theme song, don't you? But that's kind of the,

the clapping part is kind of the fun. And I'd place a huge responsibility and blame on that on TVNZ, who played that show on loop for about 17 years too. So that means they would have spent 1,600 hours of their life watching Friends. But you do, I guess a lot of us have a show, like it's kind of like a comfort show where you just put something on that you love, and you know you've loved it and you've watched it before

and you just enjoy watching it. What's your one? Maybe it would be The Simpsons. Simpsons, yeah. As a kid, my sister and I, we grew up loving The Simpsons, watching it, and now I've got my kids into The Simpsons, so it's become a little show that we all put on together and we'll watch an episode together.

Now I'm pushing the buttons today. Can we get some acknowledgement of these themes just coming as soon as you mention a show Oh yeah, Megan mentioned a show, MASH was her one Here's the theme song I always enjoyed Frasier Oh, great to stay married with children

None of those were actually suggested I was just throwing you on the spot Mine was Gossip Girl. Yeah, Gossip Girl. Are you wanting that theme now? Jesus, why did I come all cocky with the theme? I mean, you pointed it out. Yeah, you did.

We didn't actually want the themes, but it was great to have them. Gossip Girl, yeah, I haven't really got it. I need to get into Gossip Girl. I'm sure my daughters would love it. Yeah, Blake Lively, Leighton Meester. Is she a bit loose-lipsing ships, is she? Bit loose on the lips. Oh, with gossiping

gossiping oh there's there's like a website that's like someone undercover in society is like spilling the tea on all these kids

oh and then at the end at the very end you know who you find out who Gossip Girl is is it Blake Lively don't say

no the rule is you just never say what if you're a fan of Gossip Girl you never say you never say who Gossip Girl is well I'm gonna guess it was Blake Lively.

You might be right. You might not be. I googled that now. Don't say it on the radio, Jono. Okay. For me, it was, now this is very unusual, but I do find this very comforting, and it's something I just watch,

and I've watched, I don't know if I've watched the entire series of, but the Forensic Files on Crime and Investigation Channel, where they investigate cold cases it was in fact stacky botrys atra investigators now knew that spores from stacky botrys atra were in the air of the sick baby's homes stacky botrys atra is that the most enjoyable word to say stacky botrys Otra. Is that not the most enjoyable word to say? Stachybotrys Otra? Of course, that's what you watch. Well, that's your comfort show.

That's your comfort show. And the narration is just, you'd have that guy read your bedtime stories. It's a little creepy, though. A little creepy. Stachybotrys Otra. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast.

Fit series. The shows that you love to just watch and you've watched over and over again. Get some great calls and texts coming through. Well, your friends have watched Friends. many times multiple times over 20 times i reckon 20 times that's crazy and not even i was looking at an article here not even the most watched series of all time that's at number 29 really yeah wow really game of thrones number one oh yeah that was just massive just huge then stranger things then walking dead those are the

top three simpsons with all bloody 768 episodes or whatever they've got. They're at number 25. But this is most watch, not like re-watch, right? No one's re-watching all of Game of Thrones. No, it feels like the series, once you've watched it, maybe you wouldn't re-watch it. Big commitment.

I'm sorry for trying to bring some hard stats to the table. Some hard facts. No, I appreciate it. I really liked it. Thank you. Feels like you didn't. All right, let's go to the table some hard facts some research i really liked it thank you feels like you didn't all right let's go to the phones uh you come for uh you're comfortable watching show that we'll start with you waza good morning welcome to the new zealand's breakfast

good morning guys lovely to have you on waza what is it for you buddy there's two of them. The modern one is Big Bang Theory. Oh, the Big Bang. And the older one is actually MacGyver. Oh, I love MacGyver. Richard Dean Anderson. Making stuff with a paper clip and chewing gum and all sorts. Wait, wait, here we go. That was the big explosion on screen. Yeah.

There you go. Take two, Jack. He got himself out of some hairy situations, didn't he? Yeah. I remember he was buried alive with red ants that were trying to eat him. I remember that one. Yeah. Genius.

A genius with a mullet. Blew them up somehow. Yeah. Hey, that's a good start there, was it? You guys have a great day. Appreciate your call. Thanks, guys. Good on you. We'll get Bex on. Welcome, Bex. What's your Appreciate your call. Thanks, guys. It's good on you. We'll get Bex on.

Welcome, Bex. What's your comfort watching show? Hey, guys. How's it going? We're doing well, mate. I've got a couple as well. I love a bit of Modern Family. Oh, that's a good show.

Phil would have to be one of the best characters on TV. Phil Dunphy, yeah. Yeah, very lovable. Hilarious. Yeah, very funny. How many times have you watched the Modern Family series? I definitely haven't watched it 20 times. I think that is out the gate.

Yeah, they were on the weekend. They were like, I'm just looking forward to going home and watching Friends. You're like, you've seen it. You've seen it again. There's other shows that have been made. I know, but that was them. Yeah, and what was the other one there, Bex? The Office.

The Michael Scott is also hilarious. Oh, the US version of The Office? and what was your other one there, Bex? The Office, but a Michael Scott is also hilarious. Oh, the US version of The Office? Yeah. You love that one, don't you? Yeah, I do love it. Producer Taylor, she's watched that, I think, over 10 times. Yeah, she loves it. And it's like the Americans, they took the ball and they ran with it.

They went bloody hundreds of episodes. I think the UK one, the Ricky Gervais one, was only like 12 episodes or something. Only a couple of series, but they really went to some places. So there you go. This is great shows. Hey, good on you, Bix. Go and have a great day in Toulon. I appreciate it.

We'll get Alice on your comfort show there. Alice, what is it? Hey, good morning, guys. That has got to be my number one Sons of Anarchy because Jack Taylor is the most fun soothing honey for the eyes Charlie Huffman Huffman that the guy my wife was like a bad D Ellis Charlie oh my she's she's a guy your mum warned you about so many episodes of that I was like are you still watching this? My wife would be like,

oh yeah, it's so good. Maybe she's just watched it over and over again, but she loved it. Yeah, he loved it. Yeah, but not long-term relationship material, you know? You can't have a gang member, mate.

Wasn't he up for playing the guy in Fifty Shades? He was. He turned it down, I think. And then everyone's like, damn it! He's gorgeous. Well, let's all agree

that's Charlie who Hunnam Hunnam you'd ride him like a motorbike wouldn't you definitely was we'll send you out

some help enjoy your rest of your day coming up next he's all flustered I am very flustered the hits

the Jono and Ben podcast to catch up with Holly Jean Brooker from the parenting place it's a great website if you need any tools or have got some great articles on parenting and dealing with all sorts of things when it comes to raising kids at theparentingplace.nz.

And Holly joins us now. Welcome. Thank you. How are you doing? We're doing all right. We always love talking to you from theparentingplace.nz. Today we're talking about winners and losers when it comes to our kids. Not when it comes to radio shows or anything like that. I know, I was like, who are we referring to?

Yeah, we've got some home truths on the way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bit of a tough, tough idea for kids to get their head around too if they're first experiencing. I mean, we've been well-versed in losing for a long time. We've got used to it. But kids, it's a whole new concept.

Yeah, totally. And it's a bit of a skill, eh, learning to win and lose well. And I think some kids can become quite fixated on winning and they find losing so unbearable. Some kids are more naturally competitive, so it's even harder for them. And, you know, that's okay. But I think that as parents or caregivers,

there's definitely some stuff that we can do to help them manage the disappointment of losing and to kind of move forward. It's a hard balance, isn't it? Because obviously you want them to be gracious when they lose, but then you look at the most successful people when it comes to sports

are often the people that hate losing the most. Totally. Do you teach them to be driven and go for it? Or do you be like, no, it's okay, just participation? It just depends on how much of a psychopath parent you are. Big psychopath. I think there's a balance. I think some kids are definitely more competitive

and naturally really sporty and really talented. And of course we want to nurture that and we want to support them to be the best that they can be but we're definitely going to help them navigate the hard feelings when they don't succeed the way that they want to as well really important to help them feel like okay these feelings are okay

they're normal and actually mum and dad they get it and they have been through this too and just help them process it What about when it comes to playing games with your kids? I mean, my wife from a very early age, she's very competitive. You know, like we play Cluedo with the kids and she's like, I'm solving this with all the kids.

I'll be like, just ease back, just ease back. That's me. You know, but I remember my dad with tennis, the same thing. I'd get a point and then all of a sudden a serve would come down at about 150 k's an hour. I'd be like, okay. Just, you know, at what point do you stop sort of go is it when they get good enough to sort of beat you i mean i find that hard i'm super

competitive my mum was the same she would always i remember going out and netball golf shooting with her and she would just smash us i was deteriorating i do the same thing but um i think you know i'm learning because this is something i have to work on all the time because i just want to win i'm not holly you're like literally trying to win against an eight-year-old. They need to know we're superior. Because it's hard. I find it really hard. But we definitely have a process in our family where we always shake each other's hands

and say, great game. You did awesome. And we congratulate the winner. I think a lot of it, too, is just the longer they play sport, the more they realize, particularly with Oscar of basketball and stuff, he was gutted the first few games he was losing when he was younger. But the longer they play, there's another three games next weekend. You know, there's always more games.

There's wins and losses. There's wins and losses, and you learn to accept it. That's right. Yeah. I love that because actually that's something that our coaches talk about, that there's, you know, while winning is exciting, there are so many more opportunities to learn when you don't win in the first place.

So losing isn't failing. It's like it's not an end point. It's a step along the journey. So I think reframing that when we talk to our kids is actually, hey, you guys lost, you might have lost the game tonight, but actually your progress is incredible in the way that you guys are working as a team

or, you know, your sportsmanship. It's like I always say to these Warriors fans, you've got working as a team or your sportsmanship. It's like I always say to these Warriors fans, you've got to have the losses to appreciate the wins. Yeah. Philosophical, Megan. Philosophical. Full of gold, Megan.

I do love it, but I can never remember her ever once saying that to us. Yeah, I know. But it's a great quote. Holly, it's always good to talk to you. You've got a great article on The Parenting Place, How to Talk About Winning and Losing. If you want to see more, parentingplace.nz. We always good to talk to you. You've got a great article on The Parenting Place, how to talk about winning and losing. If you want to see more, parentingplace.nz. We'll catch up with you soon. Cool.

Nice. Thanks, guys. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. People-pleasing. We all know people who are people-pleasers. In fact, there's one in the studio I would like to hazard a guess. Oh, you don't have to say that about me. It's not you.

Oh, it's not me. It's not you. I love pleasing people. Although you do send out emails being like, you're legends to everyone all the time. Pleasuring people is one of my hobbies. Just, can I say those emails where you're like, thanks, you're legends. It feels a bit throwaway now. Yeah, I've buttoned off doing them.

I've buttoned off doing them. Have you? Yeah, you made me gun shy. Oh, sorry. Well, no, Maddie and PJ actually did. They're like, you can't reply all thanks because then it puts pressure on everyone else to go, thanks, thanks, thanks. So I just So I just It does I just don't even acknowledge anyone now Don't even open the email You're a legend

No the people pleaser in the room I think is our very own Ben Boyce You're probably right You're probably right Doesn't like upsetting people No But it's not good for you Even if like

What was the incident where The pizza person had completely screwed up Your wife's order Oh that was the burger place The burger place And then I came back And I rang up up came back and he was like sorry about that i went oh it's all good mate my wife was going it's not all good it's all good it's all good i listened to you and i'm like it's all good it's all good i completely screwed up the order i had to go hi recorder came back it's all good yeah but yeah so yeah well there's a study that's come out and

said it's actually not good for your health It'll cause you stress, anxiety And to the nth degree Exhaustion, poor sleep Because you go to bed at night thinking about things That you might have said to people Are you just reading Ben Boyce's biography? Is that you though? Would you go to bed at night

Thinking about things you've said to people? Often, that's why I do have to go to sleep without watching something on TV or whatever because otherwise my brain goes into overdrive. So I'm just like, watch something, turn my brain off sort of thing. Occasionally. Occasionally I'll be like, oh, should I text him? I probably shouldn't have said that. So occasionally.

But it doesn't like keep me up at night. Not great for my health. Yeah. Well, let me run through. This is how you know if you are a people pleaser. There is a list of things you do in your life. Number one, are you a radio announcer? Would you say you put the needs and opinions of others before your own?

Yes. Do you? I'm just going to say do you to everything here. You find it hard to say no and you get caught up doing things you don't want to do? Yeah, definitely. Last week he signed up to an event he did on EMC. Lied.

Said he had something on that date. They said, that's fine. We can be flexible. No, then he said, I'll do any other day. And I'm like, okay. Fatal mistake. All right, yeah.

You allow others to take advantage of your easygoing approach. Yeah, probably. Yeah, okay. You don't speak up or have strong views. Oh, yeah. I'm trying to get better at that.

I'm trying to get better. Have you ever heard an opinion from him on this show? You're like, but I just want to be devil's advocate. They murdered someone. He was defending Hitler the other day. I was like, no, he might have been okay. I did not defend Hitler. You find confrontation scary and best to be avoided?

Yeah, definitely, yeah. So if you get delivered the wrong thing at a cafe, you kick up the... Hey, it's a nice surprise. I'm like, surprise, maybe it's something I... It's all good. Maybe it's something I wouldn't have ordered this, but maybe it's something I should have ordered. Do you say sorry a lot?

Oh, yeah. All the time. Yeah. You mimic others' behaviour so you can fit in. Yeah, probably. Oh, don't say that. Well, no, I try not to, but yeah. I try not to do

That last one as much But yeah You're indecisive Yeah Yes Can't even make a decision On whether he's indecisive Or not

I'm trying to I'm trying to find reasons Why I'm not these things And I can't Are you resentful Because deep down You know you can be exploited Oh Ben

I probably am I probably am Yeah All these things So what's the answer so what's the thing to the opposite of all of those things oh there's no little thing this has just been the most least surprising news ever for no it does say that you deserve to have like your own self-belief and your own opinions and you should stand up for yourself