Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Jono's Back Alley Deals...

Episode Date: October 22, 2024

ON THE SHOW TODAY: Megan's daughter birthday wake up did NOT go as planned... Our friend Daniella has a surprise for us to open! Does Ben have the most obedient dog? traditions that have lasted a life time! Is a four hour nap just a sleep? Jono and Ben hug for three minutes-ish Is this passive aggressive? Can we guess the song based off the instruments?  Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono and Ben Instagram: THEHITSBREAKFASTSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This John Owen Ben podcast, hey that's us, brought to you by HelloFresh, the experts and tastes that Kiwis love. Welcome to the podcast. On a Wednesday morning as Megan eats some rhubarb. Yeah. Isn't that what you mean to say, rhubarb, rhubarb, rhubarb, isn't it? Rhubarb mumbalard. Yeah, is that what? What do you mean, what do you mean to say that? I think it means to...

Warms up your mouth. Warms up your mouth. Rhubarb mumbalard. Rhubarb mumbalard. Over and over. Did you learn that at broadcasting school? It's a theater thing, isn't it? Is it broadcasting school it's a one it's a theater thing is it a tongue

yeah maybe it's a theater thing rhubarb mamelade rhubarb mamelade it's not meant to be a tongue twister it's meant to just kind of warm up your mouth I think

no idea like Irish wrist watch is a tongue twister Irish wrist Irish Irish wrist watch that's a tongue twister

that's a hard one to say kids were doing that on me the other day and I was not good at saying it. I felt like I was bedridden Guinness. Irish wristwatch. Why can't I do that? The Irish don't even make wristwatches.

Maybe they should. Irish wristwatch. It sounds like you put on an Irish accent. What was intriguing though was the term Megan, of course. Of course. What would you expect? Grows her own rhubarb.

Yeah, she does. From scratch. Everything from scratch, eh? Why do you give me shit for it? That tone. Oh, no. It's just because I... Groves her own.

It's not difficult. What else are you growing? At the moment, we've got silverbeet. I've got herbs, parsley, thyme, rosemary. I've put some leeks in. And I've got cherry tomatoes. Sorry, talking over you. How much love do you have to give the veggie garden like that?

You have to give it water, yeah. Yeah, so you can't just rely on nature to rain, but then you have to water regularly. Yeah, and then I tried to grow carrots, and they had heaps of greenery at the top and then a little nothing on the bottom. Oh, so you're like, these are going to be big dogs. Apparently that's a lot of nitrogen,

so it makes all the leafy stuff above. I don't know if I lost you. Does it taste good? Yeah, you've kind of lost me, to be fair. I really, I tapped out of there. I started drinking and I was like, oh, jeez. Oh, jeez, I've been a 15 on this thing.

Ben was like looking at his laptop and Jono looked away. I was like, I've lost you. I mean, you asked, so. All right, thisub chat's great guys but we've got a whole podcast an amazing show we're prepared for

doesn't take a lot for Ben to be lost in emails you lost him quick that time yeah I started talking really getting deep on Rubub I'm like okay I'm ready for this

moved on from the Rubub actually yeah well actually speaking of unusual things to do with well you know Jono's throwing stones at you about making things from scratch no this is a shit segue but I'll let you have it yeah wellono's throwing stones at you about making things from scratch this is a shit segue but i'll let you have it well he's throwing stones at you food

related stuff okay yeah well what he's doing when it comes to picking up stuff from the butcher and he wanted to talk about that getting caught on security footage we're not caught on i was just on security the whole time we were just this is such a weird thing that you do it's just an arrangement it's weird it's a yeah sorry why is it weird it's it's a strange arrangement i would say and to happen that like you can't do it the day before the day after yeah or during normal hours yeah it's unusual but anyway you'll hear it right now on the podcast uh well speaking of all things illegal cctv uh you know the camera footage i've got us kind of a an arrangement with a local butcher

where he can sometimes leave meat for me out the back and then I'll just leave money in a hidden location. Okay? What? It's just like

because he's closed sometimes Mondays. I love how you brought this in so innocently. Wait, wait, wait. This sounds so dope. It feels like this is a cover for something else. Is it in a chiller?

Yeah. He stays as a butcher. I might get close, but I'll leave you some meat to fester in the sun for four hours. Not for four hours. So he's closed on a Monday. All right, buddy, we'll come in on a Sunday. How badly do you want meat? Organise your life better

I need some sausage He's like Don't tell Jono about supermarkets And other butcheries I'm supporting local This is the most random thing ever Anyway This is not the crux of the story

The crux of the story. Okay? The crux of the story was, he's like, I didn't know, next time I'm sorry, I didn't know if you had left the money, but I checked back on the CCTV footage

and he was showing me the CCTV. So what, you have to get cash out for this? I mean, how's this work? Yeah,

give him cash. Where do you leave the cash? Just under the, we're not going to tell anyone. Even though I kind of just. What's the butcher called? It's under a chilli. Does he do this for other people which is you yes sometimes he leaves it next door at the dairy too so he's going to the dairy you pick it up too uh but anyway it's not about the meat picking okay it's like you just do it on the day before the day after so he's playing

the cctv footage he's like i look back and this is you dropping the money off. But then anyone, no matter who you are, could be a sweet elderly lady feeding their neighbour's kitten. If you're on CCTV footage, you automatically look suspicious, don't you? Even if you're doing nothing. Yeah, especially when it's after hours and you're putting cash under a box at the back of a butcher. The whole thing sounds suspicious, even without the CCTV footage. So I was telling the police anyway.

I'm not suspicious. It was meat. It's in a brown bag and it's meat. I promised you it was a saucy. What I'm trying to say is CCTV footage is designed to make you look guilty, no matter what you're doing, even if you're just doing the most. Innocently getting meat and putting money under thing on a day off with the butcher. That's weird, man.

That's a weird story. Why is it a weird story? I know that we're focusing on the wrong point for you. Yeah, exactly. I had a whole rant to do on CCTV footage. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Do you know I did my neck in yesterday? We're doing something for HelloFresh.

I had to push Ben on a swing. What'd you put? I don't know how I put my neck out. Just put pushing on a. Oh, God. How do you put? I don't know how I put my neck out. Just put pushing on a... Oh, God. That's it. Ouch. It's very offensive, Ben.

Yeah. I felt like I was doing a lot of the work, too. Yeah. He had his legs going. He was doing a lot of the work. Yeah. How does that relate to HelloFresh? You're pushing on a swing.

It's a long backstory, mate. It is. The main thing is my neck's out. Okay. I got to go on the swing. That's two of the things you want to do. Now, yesterday was a big day in your household, Megan? Yeah, my daughter turned two,

and most kids really fizz over their birthday. When do they start to comprehend their birthday, you think? I think, I don't know, like two or three. They kind of understand that it's like a day for her. I was like, whose birthday is it? She was like, mine! So she knew. Well, let's stay for the record. At one, they idea so we can probably pump the brakes on the one on the

first birthday the first birthday is for the parents like yes we made it yeah and this yeah from now on it's like but now it's about the kids yeah but she this is what she's like so my husband deals with the children in the morning so he was really excited to go and wake her up in the morning. He turns off, she sleeps with white noise, creeps into her room on tiptoes and goes up to beside her and was like, happy birthday. She goes, no, no. And he's a singer too.

He's a great singer. Yeah, you're right. He was on point. It would have been, he would have warmed his vocal cords up. He was like, it's your birthday. She's just screaming, no. So he had to leave the room and wait until she's ready to get up. She finally, like half an hour later, calls out, dad.

And so he's like, oh, you're ready now. Then, so she gets. Did he get another rendition of happy birthday then? I don't know. I don't think so. Because she decided that clothes were not for her yesterday. She didn't want to wear any clothes so she got ready for daycare

in a nappy. In her birthday suit? Yeah. Just a nappy. She's eating in her nappy. Everything he offered she was like, no! Not today. Birthday dress, nothing. I mean it's your birthday but you can make those big calls on your birthday surely, can't you? It felt like yesterday she was like, yeah, it's my day and I will do what I want.

Then she gets a birthday card that like sings, which is a terrible idea. Oh, yeah. It's nice to give that to the parents, though. I do find the joy in giving that to them because you're like, you're going to hate that card. It's always like a duck. It's a Frozen tune. You know how I feel about Frozen? It sucks.

Oh, you don't like Frozen, eh? No. She felt Elsa was a bit whiny. Yeah. And so she's opening and closing it. She loved the card, but her brother wanted to, he's like, can I just have a turn? She's like, no, no, scream. Ends up whacking him on the head with the card and running away.

So she was full diva mode yesterday, despite it being her birthday. Right. And so how'd the dinner go down? Did she throw the dinner out? Tacos. Oh, so we all had tacos, Taco Tuesday, and she decided she wanted broccoli. Oh, yeah? Good for you.

Vegetables are always good for your birthday, too. Where's the broccoli? Legit, probably her favorite food. Again, I don't know who this child is, but she loves broccoli, so that was her complaint at dinner time. Well, welcome to, don't they say terrible twos, and then it's kind of a glimpse into the teenage years? If they're really bad when they're young, do they get better when they're older?

I don't know, or is it the flip side of that, is it the opposite as well, you know? Or do they stay the same? I'm not sure. I feel like every kid's going to be different. She's just going to be a punisher. I don't think it's going to turn off. Well, happy second birthday there, Aya. Yeah, love you. If she's ready to hear that, Aaron, now. She's probably not ready be a punisher. I don't think it's going to turn off. Well, happy second birthday there, Aya. Yeah, love you.

She's ready to hear that, Aya. She's probably not ready to hear that. No. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. I was trying to find my sock. I thought I'd left it or lost it somewhere. It still hasn't been found. It was a lucky sock, a black one with a four-leaf clover on it.

And I thought maybe it was at the quest in Tauranga where I stayed. We actually spent $30 million of on-air time trying to find this sock. But you never found it. So, yeah, we did phone the Quest in Tauranga, and we met Daniela, and she thought that you may have left it there. So she did a big search. She couldn't find it. It didn't turn up.

But she has sent us a package, which Megan has. It could be the sock. Good morning, Daniela. Good morning to you guys. How are you doing? Nice to talk to you. Now, you've sent us a gift, a package. Yeah, yes, because that's how much I love you guys.

Oh. Okay, Daniela, thank you so much. We haven't opened it yet. Am I allowed to open it? It's hard and soft. Like, there's a hard aspect. And a soft aspect. Okay. What would you have packed that was hard and soft Like there's a hard aspect And a soft aspect Okay

What would you have packed that was hard and soft? Oh we're about to find out You don't have to send us anything Oh my god What is it? I'm going to pass it to Jono Daniela It says

Can I read it out in your accent Daniela? You can Try your best I'm not sure if you will be able to. Ciao, a ben. I wish I could have found a Mamma Mia, your luckiest sock. But I couldn't, and I thought I could have replaced it with this one. I hope you'll like it.

From Daniela. Ciao. Did I talk that badly? Oh, Lord. No, I'm sorry. You don't sound as bad as that. So you've given us socks. Daniela has... No Did I talk that badly? Oh, Lord. No, I'm sorry. You don't sound as bad as that. So you've given us socks. Daniela has.

No, not just any socks. These are great socks. Is that your face on those socks, Daniela? Of course. Oh, we got Daniela's socks. Oh, so my socks, they had a lucky, okay, they had a four-leaf clover on it, lucky socks, and I lost them, the black socks,

and now you put a four-leaf clover on these socks with your, and I lost them, the black socks, and now you put a four-leaf clover on these socks with your face throughout there. That's incredible. There you go. That's personalized just for you, Ben, and John and Megan got their own socks. We do too. Mine has lemons, so I assume you're saying I'm a bit of a lemon,

but that's good because it's got your face on the lemons as well, and so does Megan's. Where did you get these printed, and was the printer like, well, this is the first time anyone's asked to have their face on socks? I know. Sorry. I hope you enjoy that. If not, too bad.

You can tuck in the pin. Oh, no. That's great. That's awesome. We will wear these. We will put these on, Daniela. I've got new lucky socks. Thank you, Daniela.

Yeah, my pleasure. I thought to differentiate, you know, because Ben gave me a lot of creeps so far with his lucky socks. And I thought, you know, to make him happy, finally have a second pair of lucky socks. And for the poor Jono and Megan that have been listening on the radio for weeks about the socks. All right, mate. All right.

What are you, our boss now? We're getting a prize too. Thank you so much. Okay. Yeah, that's awesome. And she also put in some chocolate for our producer, Ali, because she's been dealing with all of us. Oh, wow.

She's amazing also to listen to all three of you guys every day. You know, we need to reward that. We do. Oh, you're awesome. Well, thank you so much, Miss Lovie. And we'll look forward to catching up with you next week. See you next week, guys. Actually, I talk with you next week. I wish to see Well, thank you so much, Miss Lovie, and we'll look forward to catching up with you next week. See you next week, guys. Actually, I talk with you next

week. I wish to see you, not see you. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Just quickly, we had to do some filming yesterday, and it required my dog, Bo, to be part of the filming. Now, we couldn't get to pick up the dog on the way there, so I had to let, you know, Jessie from the office

who was organising it, she went to pick up the dog. He's a lot So I had to let, you know, Jessie from the office who was organizing it, she went to pick up the dog. He's a lot of dog. Have you seen Bo? Yeah. Big, white, samoyed, kind of like a big, fluffy husky, husky almost like a dog sort of thing.

He's whiter than a Trump rally is what we say. Snow white. Big goofball, likes barking, loves barking. He's a very protective dog, which is awesome to have in the house. And so Jessie had met him briefly before, you know, with the dog. Like I got up in the morning and I was like, as I was leaving at, you know, just five o'clock, I was like, hey, Bo, Jesse's going to come around.

You know, I felt like I needed to tell him because it would be weird that the gate would be open. I'd give Jesse the gate code, a gate would open. She was going to grab him and left the lead out and he was going to get in the car. But I was like, how would this go down? Well, when you told that news to Bo, he was like, no, all good, mate. I'll beat you up. Thanks, Bo.

I'll definitely remember that later. He was lying on the floor. He had one eye sort of open. So I felt like he was listening, but almost like, oh. You realize I don't understand anything you've been saying this whole time. But I thought, at least I could tell you. You're front footed. I'm with him, mate.

There's going to be a lady coming around. You probably don't remember Jessie. But at some stage, the gates are going to open. Someone's going to pick up a lead, and you're going to get in the car. And I was like, well, hopefully he's going to be a lady coming around. You probably don't remember Jessie. At some stage, the gates are going to open. Someone's going to pick up a lead, and you're going to get in the car. And I was like, well, hopefully he's going to be all good with that, because a protective dog is going to bark. But Jessie went around there. The gates opened.

She had the code. He barked a little bit. She opened the door. He got straight in. Straight in the car. See your family? Yeah, so I'm like, my dog. That is the worst guard dog ever. Where are we going oh yeah I'm going

yeah for GC's sake I'm glad it went that way though because you're really rolling the dice with her yeah exactly yeah it was all good

he did bark did his job and then he was like oh Bo how you doing oh yeah okay I guess we can go with it what an agreeable dog go with the flow dog

we had a courier once who came around opened the side of the van, and then ran a package inside, and Bo just ran and jumped in the courier van and came back out. And I'm like, mate. Is he trying to send us a message like, take me? Take me, anyone.

Someone save me. Where are you going? It sounds fun. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. A lovable story we were talking about yesterday after the show. Now, there's a group of six elderly mates in the UK, and they've kept a tradition of going to the pub on a Thursday. They've kept their tradition of meeting up for 56 years.

Wow. How cool is that? Now, they're all in their 80s now. They met up as 24-year-olds. They go to the same pub every Thursday, and over those 56 years, they've only missed 24 Thursdays. And you think it's been COVID and all sorts of stuff? Yeah, I was going to say lockdown and yeah.

Families and Christmas, you know, there's a whole lot of stuff, like work, all that stuff. 24 Thursdays is all that they've missed. They said the conversations has changed a lot. At start, they would talk about, you know, things like soccer and sex. These days, it's more prostates and pensions. But they're friends for life and they go there every week. Incredible.

I would have thought you ran out of conversation by about 1985. Yeah. And they've shown a lot of dedication to that. You imagine, we fade out on everything on this show. Oh, I can't make it. I've got something else on. So kudos to the commitment. Even that there's never been an argument or anything that's managed to come between them

over those 50-something years. And the real winners out of that, the pub. Oh, the pub? Yeah, right. And the real losers, their livers. Probably one of those sort of things where that's kind of their table too. Imagine they turn up on Thursday night

and they're like, oh, oh. Have you ever taken someone's table? I did that once at a cafe. It's down the road from your house. Right. And I just sat up there and then I could feel

oh was it someone's actual like that no that was like their unofficial table and I could feel it wasn't like a reserved site

no it wasn't a reserved site they didn't even need the ambience changed around me and then the barista had to come and go

you've taken their table and I looked over and it was a group of retiree men to meet there every morning aww yeah did you put your foot down and say well that's not and go you've taken their table i looked over and it was a group of retiree men to meet there every morning oh yeah we just put your foot down and say well that's not got their name on it no jono's part of the group now i'm one of the retirees senior citizens so that's the way you guys

found some things in common gold card we get discounted pensions they talk about it all great chat so we wanted to know i know 0800 the Hats, 4487, what's something that you've been doing quite regularly, like maybe once a week for many, many years? Well, maybe even once a month as well. Like what's on the regular that you've been going? Because some people go to like quiz nights. A friend of ours hosted the same quiz night for many, many years.

20 years. Yeah. Wow. Every week. Yeah. Fish and chip Friday for me. Oh, you love your fish and chip. It's a week. Fish and Chip Friday for me. Oh, you love your fish and chip. It's a staple.

Fish and Chip Friday. Nightmare for me. It's my weekly clogging of the arteries. And I've got a real relationship. You know you've gone there enough when obviously the number comes up on the phone when I dial and she just says, same again, Jonathan. Oh, really? Yeah.

I even hosted a bit of an advertorial for her, remember? Yeah, you did. On Chinese Facebook. Went live to China. Heard of China? Wow. Audience of 1.4 billion. What's that?

How many people were watching? Do they have Facebook? I didn't think they had Facebook. WeChat. They've got WeChat. She's like, we're going live to China because she doesn't only do seafood. Diversifies in all sorts of areas. Handbags.

How many times have you been to the fish and chip shop and you're like, damn, I could go and get a new handbag. You take it home in a handbag Fish and chips Sell you a handbag and your fish and chips So we went online And she was advertising A fish that you get in New Zealand

Three fillets of it in China Sell for like $25,000 What? Yeah I can't remember the name of the fish But I had to hold the fillets up China would be like Who the hell is this guy? China probably was pretty confused.

Who is this white devil? I understand. In New Zealand, people would go, oh, that's the guy from the video. Who used to do the thing? I guess he'd be. Who's this guy? Even in New Zealand, you'd be like. Oh, I wish we'd seen that.

Even in New Zealand, you'd be like, oh, God, has it gone to that now for him? Advertising handbags in a fish and chip shop wow okay uh so what's the regular thing that you do maybe it's a tradition or maybe you begin seeing getting your hair cut like once every couple of weeks or a nail person or the hits the jonah and ben podcast all of uh people in britain who've been meeting at the same pub for 56 years every week group of the lads lads, just the lads, 56 years. That's really sweet. The lads are in their 80s now, but it's nice.

It's awesome. Yeah, same pub. They've only missed 24 Thursdays over 56 years. Your weekly traditions. We're going to kick things off with you, Danielle, this morning. How are you? Hi, guys. I'm good.

How are you? We're doing really well. It's lovely to have you on the show, Danielle. What's your weekly tradition? Yeah, so we take our three-year-old, myself, my husband, and our baby. We go along to Sun World, a Chinese buffet, on a Thursday. Oh, Sun World. It sounds delicious.

You had me at buffet in China. So how often have you been doing this? Probably for the last seven to eight months. Oh, okay. So you almost had a year. Are they getting. So, yeah, almost at a year. Are they getting to know you now, saving you a table? Yeah, so they just go the regular table, 27,

yeah, as we walk through. Are you on York Street? Is that Sun World? There's a few Sun Worlds. I think it's 7th Street. Yeah, right. Looks bloody good. Dumplings, you've got to name it all, mate. So good. Alright, that's a good tradition. We like your weekly tradition. See if you can get

to 56 years. Jay, good on you. How are you, Jay? Morning, guys. I'm good. How are you? Good morning. Your weekly tradition, monthly or annual? It can be either. Yeah, so it's a yearly thing, but my brother and I take turns every other Christmas

gifting each other the Licks Africa gift set. Lynx Africa set. I love it. So how many years have you been gifting that to each other? Oh it's getting close to 20 now. It's been every single R&B he's done which is yeah so we've yeah it's sort of it's getting up there. So does anyone use the same gift set or is it is it that you buy a new version of the Lynx Africa gift set? Always the same one that's out the warehouse, the one that you walk in in December and it's got the Christmas list for a gift set. Always the same one. You're actually using it.

Yeah, well, because we end up doing festivals and things and so the gifts of the toiletry bag comes in pretty handy, but we've just got like 30 of them piled up now. That is brilliant. That is so good. So R&V, you go along smelling like a teenage boy. Can I just say, though, Lynx Africa, my son, peak Lynx Africa demograph right now.

His whole room just a cloud of Lynx Africa when you walk in. It's an underrated fragrance. I was going to say, it doesn't smell bad. No, it's beautiful. They need to make a Lynx R&V one, I think, at some point. A Lynx R&V. And you get the body wash, too, with that pack, I imagineV. And you get the body wash too with that pack, I imagine. Yeah, you get the body wash as well.

So, yeah, perfect. Nice. Yeah, brilliant. Hey, thank you so much for your call, Jay. Appreciate it. Great text coming through. How cool was this? So my husband used to meet with work colleagues every morning before work to have a coffee.

They all now work at separate jobs, but Monday to Friday they still meet every morning to have a coffee. Before they go before they go to the separate jobs they've still kept up their tradition obviously they must still work close by each other that's a lovely every morning every morning monday friday they said he got he's there right now he's there doing it right now that's wife's thing as well the hits the jonathan ben podcast we want to talk to producer grace about something that she's doing quite regularly. Mentioned after the show yesterday. What did you do on, so this is Monday afternoon, okay?

This is the beginning of the week. So you get up early for the job. Yeah, I get up early and then work. And then I went home and then I just had a little four-hour nap. So you say little nap. You're like, I have a little nap. And then you say four hours. It's a little nap you're like I have a little nap and then you say four hours

is a little nap four hours is almost a night well it's pretty much a night's sleep that's some nights I get four hours that's crazy

I often get four hours sleep do you set an alarm or are you just letting your body go for it I set an alarm but then it just never well yeah jeez you know when you're

napping more than Joe Biden you've got an issue you've got an issue four hours anything after the 45 46 minute, you've got an issue. You've got an issue. Four hours. Anything after the 45, 46-minute mark, you've entered sleep territory. Yeah.

You haven't got sleep. Do you then go to bed at like a normal hour and go to sleep? Then I get like seven hours of sleep, so I don't know what that – What? 11 hours. So you have no problems going to sleep again at night? No, I'm just a tired person. You would be worried about how much stuff you're missing out on. Oh, totally.

Firstly, and then secondly, I'd be like, I'm never going to sleep tonight. I'm never a tired person. You would be worried about how much stuff you're missing out on. Oh, totally. Firstly. And then secondly, I'd be like, I'm never going to sleep tonight. I'm never going to sleep tonight. Also, no offense, but I don't know where I'd find four hours of the day to lay. Yeah, see, I have no kids. Early 20s, living my best life. Oh, so's guys. Just because we're jealous, honestly.

Yeah, I do agree. Four hour nap, though. That's incredible. You can just sleep whenever you want. Yeah. Well, it's sleep banking. I think about it. I'm like, I sleep four hours.

If I don't get that much sleep that night, let's have four hours banked. Do you feel dozy when you wake up? Like, you know? Yeah, I feel completely out of it, but I kind of love that feeling. What are you getting per night, you think? Oh, maybe five hours.

Yeah, I'm five. Yeah. If I get six, that's a really good night. I'm meant to get like seven plus. Like women need to really good night. Aren't you meant to get like seven plus? Like women need to get more sleep than men, but isn't it like seven plus? It reminded me actually of a Christmas day a couple of years ago. I was up north at my mum's house and my stepdad had it. He had a big afternoon sleep, as you do on Christmas day.

And then he got up and he was obviously a bit disorientated with what day it was. He comes on out and he looked at the time and he must have thought it was like 7 o'clock in the morning and he looked at me and I'm drinking a beer and he's like mate you're having a beer and I'm like yeah

at this time and I'm like yeah he's like beer shaming me and I was like that was a weird conversation but alright

and then he came back later and he goes oh I really thought it was 7 o'clock in the morning I'm sorry about that sorry about that got totally disorientated

Alright let's open this up shall we 0800 4487 is the text for New Zealand's breakfast Let's find the biggest sleeper in New Zealand And the person getting the least amount of sleep Yeah Most and least Okay are you functioning on you know Just 3 or 4 hours a night

One of the security guards here at work Does the overnight shift Yeah that must be hard Then goes to the gym Then goes to university Then he'll get two and a half Three hours in the afternoon Then comes back in

And does his overnight shift here Jeez Goes to the gym After night shift Wow So he's averaging Three hours sleep a night Wow

And you hear those people As well as I I hate to eat my 12 hours And you're like 12 hours The hits The Jono and Ben podcast. On a Wednesday morning, we're talking about New Zealand's biggest and shortest sleeper.

Yeah, producer Grace, just slipping in a classic Monday afternoon, four hour nap. I know too, I think I know where she goes, because you go to text her about work, and it says, Grace has got a notification silence,

you're like, oh, she's having a nap. And then if you text her again later, you're like, she's still napping. But isn't there a little thing that says notify anyway? Damn right I'm notifying. Can you overwrite? I don't know what happens in the overwriting situation. Just beep?

So obnoxious going, yeah, I'm going to notify anyway. It's a mundane text too. You post it up there. It's like 2.30 in the afternoon though Wake up Yeah If I'm not sleeping You're not sleeping Sometimes you wake up

In the morning And the first My first thought is When am I going to get To sleep again I know Me too Do you do that

Yeah You always say You're going to go to bed earlier But it doesn't Every time you wake up And you're tired You're like I'm going to bed early

Tonight Tonight If you don't know It doesn't happen Parents Parenting kids All sorts So we'll go to the phone Shall we That's what we're here to do Az You're on Morning Tonight, tonight, if you don't know, it doesn't happen. Parents, parenting kids, all sorts. So we'll go to the phone, shall we?

That's what we're here to do. Az, you're on, morning. Good morning, can you hear me? Yeah, loud and clear. And 4K, as they say. We can hear you in digital Dolby surround sound. All right, Az, this is your husband. Yes, my husband.

Oh, now we can't hear her. We lost her. We did have you. Did you just hang up on her? No. It did feel like you hung up on her, but now it sounds like I hung up on her. And I saw you push a button. Hey! I know all the evidence is pointing towards me hanging up on her,

because no one else is in front of the desk right now. I didn't touch the button! Coincidentally, you pushed a button as she hung up. I didn't touch the button! I knowidentally, you pushed a button as she hung up. I didn't touch the button. I know my hands are over there. Can we get Az back on? Yeah. Patricia Ellie might have done it. No, I'll take the hint.

It's all pointing to me. Az is back. Morning, Az. Just so you know, I definitely didn't hang up on you. Okay, so your husband, what is he doing? So he sleeps so much on the weekends. So I practically solo parent during the day and stay at home mum. So I'm with the kids. And then on the weekends, I'm thinking, yes,

two days not solo parenting. Well, jokes on me, because he'll come home and he'll literally wake up at like eight o'clock in the morning, scroll on his phone for probably half an hour to an hour. And then he'll sleep again from probably about 9 to about 4, 5 p.m. What? Wake up, have something to eat, say love you, babe, and then put a boobie on and sleep for the rest of the night. Oh, wow. Jeez, and that's like an 18-hour sleep day.

Yeah, that man can sleep wherever as well. And you know what? As much as I know he can sleep anywhere, I did not think that he would fall asleep in labour, but yep, he did. It is. Now, I've said this before and I'll say it again. We're just waiting.

You know, the guys are just sitting there waiting. Stop, stop. And sometimes you guys take your time. You take too long. Megan, you can jump in here if I don't. There is like screaming. There is a job for you to do, support person. You're supposed to be holding hands, getting what we need.

Making some tea. And you know what the funniest thing is, is that my daughter, our daughter was a four-hour labourer, and he already knew that, and my son was four hours as well. He still couldn't. He's sneaking into the sleeper again. You're laughing about it. I wouldn't be laughing, so good on you.

Logan, good morning. New Zealand's shortest or longest sleeper? What are you? I'm the shortest sleeper because I'm a scooter guard, so I get home, sleep for a bit, and then I have to get up again. How many hours a day? Like three hours. Three? Three hours. Three?

Three hours. Jeez, you must be volatile. Yeah. Do you feel like you're just permanently jet-lagged? No. It's just, no. It's just because I have to just get up and then just get, because I've.

He's definitely had three hours of sleep. You've kind of trained yourself to do it. You can't even string a sentence together with a poor guy. He needs a big sleep. Well, how do you stay awake during the night then if you have to? Sometimes I drink some energy drinks and, yeah. You're fuelled on guarana and caffeine. Oh, mate.

Okay, well, thank you so much for being awake to listen to the show. Maybe our show helps you put you to sleep or something like that. That might be a good thing. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Dunedin Airport is made of world news, actually. Now, airports, they hate the drop-off zone. And I get it. If you're at an airport, people just wait for people to get off their flights

and they could be waiting a while because there's delays. So it's a real strict things at airports. They have offices, don't they, moving you along if you do? Yeah, if you're just sitting there waiting. to get off their flights and they could be waiting a while because there's delays. So it's a real strict things at airports. Yeah. They have offices, don't they, moving you along if you do? Yeah, if you're just sitting there waiting. It's like, get out of there, mate. Get out. Keep moving on.

Yeah, I understand why. Yeah. I understand why because it's called the drop-off zone. So you only do, I reckon, a minute or less in the drop-off zone. Goodbye. Get out. See you later. Well, Dunedin Airport have got a three-minute limit

on the drop-off zone. That's generous. But they put it in a nice way, and this is where we're creating world attention. It's basically a three-minute hug limit is what they're calling it. So if you want to hug someone, you've got three minutes to do it. You can say your fond farewells. And then the sign says, max hug time, three minutes. For fonder farewells, please use the car park.

So if you want longer. How much minutes does that give you, the longer car park? I think there's a 15-minute one. Then there's a further one I think you can park if you want longer... How much minutes does that give you, the longer car park? I think there's a 15-minute one, then there's a further one I think you can park if you want to really... I don't know what you're doing, maybe getting to fourth base or something. 15 minutes, you're making a family.

It does feel like that's enough time. I can make a family in under three minutes. It's more than enough time to do everything, right? Make two babies under three minutes. This has captured world attention. Yeah. Three minutes, that's a long time. It gets awkward. Two babies under three minutes This has captured world attention Yeah Three minute hug That's a long time It gets awkward

Yeah Like hugging for three minutes Yeah Why don't we do this How long is the next ad break Are you two going to hug We'll hug We'll hug for three minutes

Oh my god I've never seen you hug I've hugged multiple times Yeah Three minutes Bits on bits Like a real tight close hug Yeah Okay Three minutes We'll see how long it is Yeah It's, like bits on bits, like a real tight, close hug. Yeah.

Okay, three minutes. We'll see how long it is. Yeah, we can talk. It's got to be long. It'll feel like a long time. A hug is a long time. Do you need me to leave the room? Potentially.

See you after a minute and 30 seconds. Are you going to make a family? Yeah, I think so. I think that's what's going to happen. Well, so what's the longest you've ever hugged anyone? I don't know. Three minutes feels a long time. That's a long time for a hug.

Maybe like a minute. I'm happy to hug people. I'm like, yeah, but I just feel like minutes feels a long time That's a long time for a hug Maybe like a minute I'm happy to hug people I'm like yeah But I just feel like That's a long time Anything over 5 seconds Feels like a long time Remember like a goodbye hug

To your family You could do like 30 to a minute Couldn't you Anything longer than that You're like Can you let me go Yeah

It's like you've got stuff to do I've got stuff to do 30 seconds even feels like An eternity 10 seconds is enough. Even though I'm up, you know, like I'll be like, oh, it's so good to see you. You have a big hug. And then you're like, oh, it's, you know, it's.

Okay. We'll hug for, how long is the air break? Yeah. So we've got news as well coming up. So we'll hug for the entire duration of the air break. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, yesterday we were filming a quick little thing with the NZME crew. And Jono, you got accused of being passive aggressive over email.

Now we're filming at Jessie's house, who works here at the Hits, and well, her parents' house actually, were kind enough to give us the house to film some stuff in. If the parents don't know about it, thank you so much. Thank you for being so kind. Yeah, exactly. You probably don't. And Jessie sent an email saying there was a couple of car parks.

There was two car parks out the front of the house because it's hard to park on the street. There's two car parks in front of the house if we wanted to park there. I was driving. John, I was driving. And Tom, who was filming it, was also driving in the work car. Then Tom accused you of being passive-aggressive on your apply all. Yeah. Now, Tom used the driveway car park.

You probably had gear, right? Yeah. Ben used the driveway car park you probably had gear right yeah ben used the driveway car park yeah well you did i was talking to you at the time and you're like i'm parked on the road you just drive you know drive in there so yeah okay uh and uh here's how it played out tom does a wonderful job filming for us now jono sent you a passive aggressive email what was it so there was two parks outside the place that we're going to film uh jesse's house jesse's like you can park your car there. Now, Jono's replied to that email chain with... All good, Tom.

I can park on the street. And this was after you'd already parked. I can see why that's passive aggressive. So he's assumed that I've witnessed him park in the driveway and I've gone, all good, Tom. I'll just park on the street. When in reality, I didn't know he was in the driveway. I was saying, all good, Tom. I'll park on the street When in reality I didn't know he was in the driveway I was saying

All good Tom I'll park on the street That was the tone Yeah You don't have You need to Resurrect the tone On the road

That's why I'm a fan Of exclamation marks And ha ha's And emojis But if you put an exclamation mark At the end of that It would have just seemed Aggressive

Yeah So Tom had parked there And parked in the driveway And then got the message From Jono going, all good, I can park on the street. Yeah, and that's how I genuinely meant it. I had found a park on the street. It sounds passive aggressive to me. It does.

Especially because he'd already parked in there. It definitely sounds passive aggressive. But then, like Megan said, you fired one later on in the afternoon. Which was genuinely passive aggressive it was passive aggressive and it went to great detail every week matt anderson our boss and ashley bryce ceo of music they send out a list of hey here's the new songs we're playing on the hits yeah and ben you've been a big campaigner to get uh chapel roan on yeah good luck babe yeah it's a great song i'll try and find it here yeah so and he said this is the new song we're going to play.

He does it in a special font and then a little message behind. It's a little format every week. And I said, oh, hey, that's great. Look forward to playing that song. But then I replied back going, hey, I've done the next one for you. All ready to go.

And I made it in the same format, Chapel Roan's Good Luck, Babe. And you've been having stabs at him for weeks. We should be playing this song. Other stations are doing it. Oh, my name list as well. Yeah. So I was like, oh, yeah.

And then he came back with a research, a music research. Oh, I've tested that. That's familiar and weak or something. And I said, hey, they're my personality traits. Familiar and weak. So let's get it on. So we'll're my personality traits. Familiar in Week. So let's get it on. Yeah. So we'll see how that goes.

Familiar in Week. That's a bold move from you as someone who just likes to, you know, be a good boy. I was having a laugh, but... In front of everyone too,

a reply all. Familiar in Week's also a Tinder bio. That's right. So we'll see. This may be all you hear of Chapel Road on The Hits. It's a great, great show. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

All right, we've got this new game. Producer Grace came at us hard with Bandle. Now, it's a game where we realise how important all of the instruments are to a song for us to recognise it. Could you kick off, Producer Grace, will you tell us the format? Well, normally you start with drums and then it'll add like guitar, then you add a piano

and then it can add like singing, but it's not actually singing. It's just kind of like humming. So you don't actually hear it. So yeah, it just layers it up. The frustrating part is you're like, for the first 10 seconds, I know this song, I know this song.

Then after 10 seconds, you're like, I definitely don't know this song. Yeah. It makes you realise how similar songs are on the bass level. You're right. Chris Mack, friend of the show and friend of Ben Boyce, we've always said to Chris Mack, you just need to release an album of bass songs.

He hasn't done it yet. I don't know if there's much of an audience for it. There may be. All right, Producer Grace, we're going to kick things off. This is just the drums of a particular song. We've got to try and figure out what it is from this one instrument it is an older song we're talking 1986 1.2 billion youtube views what for some reason i thought billy idol moany moany but i have no clue what that song is it's not girls want to have fun no I have no clue what that song is.

Does not girls want to have fun? No. If you're a musician or just someone with any common sense and you think you might know the song, you can always text 4487. Is it a band with a male singer? Yes, yeah, I think so. Question mark. Okay, should we hear some more? Yeah, okay. with the bass material girl no

living on a Prius? Yes! Oh! There you go. Oh, yes. Well done. Halfway there. Oh! Okay, we've got one. Well done, Megan. Yeah, that was good.

Nice one from you. That was your best result yet, just on the bass and the drums. Yeah, that was really impressive. Okay, let's go another one. 2010. 2.5 billion YouTube views. Yeah, I love that you give the YouTube views, but they help in no way at all. No, I'm just letting it go that it's popular.

It's a popular song. You should know it. It's under the easy category. This is the drums and the bass. I wish I was better at this game. I get little waves, I'm like, yeah, no, it's not that. It all sounds so familiar though. Yeah.

This is with the piano. Oh, bloody Adele. Yes. Oh, rolling in the deep. He's got it. Oh, yeah. There you go. Rolling in the deep.

There we go. And it ends. It's hard, though. Jeez, it's hard. This is really tough. Well, thank you, Grace. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. We were talking about your childhood nicknames yesterday

after Megan let everyone know that her dad used to call her Ferret. Still calls me Ferret, which is confronting when we're in front of people and he's like, hey, Ferret. I'm like, shh, shh, shh. Ferret's cute. That's cute. Is it? Yeah.

Like I say, everyone has probably a Ferret in their friend group. Oh, Ferret's lighting his testicles on fire again. You know, something like that. It seems like a Ferret in their friend group. Oh, ferrets lighting his testicles on fire again, you know, something like that. It seems like a ferret-y thing. You are the opposite of what a ferret is. Yeah, that's why I was just trying to get the connection of why you were ferret. No idea.

You were Booner. Booner, yeah, my uncle, who gave nicknames to everyone in the family. He was a really, a nickname person. Yeah. Like a delinquent. Yeah, Booner. I didn't know what it meant, but yeah.

Felt like it was way beyond your years, the new name of Boona. Now, we put this out on Facebook yesterday after these calls came through on the show yesterday. My parents call me fridge. Oh, okay. Why is that? Well, I was a pretty big kid and never let any leftovers go in the fridge. Yeah, so it's a big square, kids. Did you come out big and square, any leftovers go in the fridge. Yes, it's a big square kid. Did you come out big and square, did you Connor?

No. Fridge has stuck with you into your adult years? Yep, yeah, they still call me Fridge and we've actually passed it down to my kids. They're now mini Fridge. Yeah, so that was Fridge. He's got his little bar fridge children. Now, 0800, did you have a nickname that your family bestowed upon you as a child?

Here's some from the Facebook on the hits breakfast. The Facebook on the hits breakfast. This is a great one here. I was born with an overshot jaw, says Christine, and my nickname was Bubba Gump. Oh. Okay. Roll with it. My fried shrimp. Yeah. Bubba's cute, though. Bubba Gump. Oh. Okay. Roll with it. My frat shrimp.

Yeah. Bubba's cute though. Bubba's cute. Bubba's very cute. Yeah. My nickname was Chachi. I was raised with my nickname. I honestly for about nine years had no idea that I had a whole other identity.

Right. Just thought her name was Chachi. Chachi Wittapetti. Also Vicky. My name was Nugget when I was crawling away from mum. I leaked and left a trail of nuggets. I'm still called Nuggy to this day. Those are the stories you want to leave behind.

Literally leave behind. But yeah, but they still hang around. My nickname is Turbo Tongue. Is that a childhood nickname? Because they talk a lot? Or a dating profile? You want to date Turbo Tongue? No, because I talked a lot when I was a child.

I was far more innocent than we're leading to believe. So 800 of the hits. What were you called as a child? Nicknames you were given by your family. We would love to talk to you this morning. Let's go to the phone. Someone's already called through. Producer Ellie's talking to someone.

Good morning to you, Ricky. How are you? Not too bad, mate. How are you? Good, thank you. What was your nickname as a kid? Well, one man is what I call my niece. Okay.

Her nickname is Smells. Smells? That's what I always used to call her because she always used to smell as a baby. Like good or bad? Bad. Yeah. You never want a bad-smelling baby, do you? Babies generally.

I love the smell of babies. Yeah, the fresh new baby smells good. And I still call her that today. Smells. I bet Smells loves that, Ricky. Thanks for your call. Appreciate you keeping these coming The hits The Jono and Ben Podcast

New Zealand's best sausage Was crowned last night Auckland's Westmere Butchery Won New Zealand's best sausage For a pork and leek sausage A whole lot of other sausage Love a sausage Sausage fest last night

Definitely was I love a sausage Yeah they'reage fest last night. I love a sausage. Yeah, they're so good. There's such obscure ones that enter those competitions, though, like fennel and asbestos and things like that. I was off sausages for a while. We ate a sausage at every Bunnings in the country, and boy, oh, boy, I couldn't do sausages for a couple of months after that.

But back in the sausage game now. Yeah, there's so many. A wide variety of sausages from all over the country. So yeah, congratulations to Westmere Butcher. Your favourite sausage? I can't imagine you would ever, would you have a sizzler? I, no, I have had a sizzler in the past. I've worked in radio.

We used to do like sausage sizzles with sizzlers. That was the terrible thing about radio is that they're like, welcome to radio. You're an intern. We assume you can cook because now you can go out and food poison everyone. No, how did we not

give people food poisoning? I think I did. I served many undercooked sausages outside a business on a Saturday morning. Maybe that's why they were sizzlers because they were pre-cooked.

Yeah, you're probably right actually. Love a sizzler. You never know what's in there but don't ask, don't think. The cheese ones? Oh, double cheese? Oh, beautiful. Beautiful. Might get a sizzler. You never know what's in there, but don't ask. Don't think. The cheese ones? Oh, double cheese? Oh. Beautiful.

Beautiful. Might get a sizzler on the way home. Now, we're talking about your childhood nicknames. What was it? Maybe it was Sizzler. Maybe they called you Sizzler. That'd be a good nickname. Great nickname.

Evan, you had a childhood nickname from your fam. Yeah. I had two of them. One was Moose, and the other one was Fish. Sorry, your I was a teenager I had two of them One was moose and the other one was fish Sorry, your phone was bad Moose and fish, was it? Yes, sorry, moose and fish, yes Is that better?

Yeah, that's great Why moose and why fish? Moose was because I was like an average-sized teenager But I had a big bum And the boys thought that was funny I was like an average-sized teenager, but I had a big bum, and the boys thought that was funny. It's a great time to get a nickname relating to body parts, isn't it, as a teenager? It doesn't make you feel self-conscious at all.

No, no, I don't know how come it didn't, but it didn't. And the fish was because I had biggest lips. I've got a real picture of me now. Big lips? I could dream of those plumpy lips of yours. Yeah, look at you now. Everyone's injecting their lips and you don't have to. Everyone wants big lips.

You're right. You still going for luxurious lips there, Evan? Well, I'm a little bit older now. I used to. Yeah. You grew into them. At least they're still a good size. Good on you. You've got a gat and some plump lips. Yeah, I love to. Yeah. You grew into them. But at least they're still a good size. Yeah. Good on you.

You got a gat and some plump lips. Yeah, I love it. Love it. So good. Thank you for all your calls and texts. Great text here, 4487. My name was Nickers because that's all I wandered around in. And still my family to this day calls me Nickers,

even when I am fully clothed. Was that a child? Yeah. Sugarbooger, says Yarny. My mum called me sugar booger and that meant for a lot of torturous years at school. Sugar booger. Sugar booger.

We can get these coming through. 4487 on the text.