Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: One Team Member's Triggering Matty With This!

Episode Date: December 5, 2024

ON THE SHOW TODAY Jono get pulled in by the spell of the Christmas Cookie times... Hilarious partner calling! We call the Bruce Mason Theatre to let them know our backstage demands ahead of our magician performance. The full Mariah Carey Montage... How did it start... How actually won? I got a handwritten letter from President bush! Megan's review of the Robbie Williams movie When was the last time you belly flopped? Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono and Ben Instagram: THEHITSBREAKFASTSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This Jono and Ben podcast brought to you by HelloFresh, the experts in tastes that Kiwis love. Welcome to the podcast. Fun one for your Friday today as we head into the weekend and head into a weekend that we're going to be doing a magic trick. I'm nervous about that one. It should be alright. We'll get there. We have a couple of rehearsals. Classic Jono. Classic Jono. Doesn't have any of the heavy lifting that you're doing at the start there Megan. But somehow you always manage to stuff it up. Coasting through life. That'll be right. Doesn't have any of the heavy lifting that you're doing at the start. But somehow you always manage to stuff it up. Coasting through life.

That'll be fine, guys. She'll be right. I do the middle part. You do the ending. You do the tough bit at the beginning. You choose the card at the end. I fill in some stuff in the middle. It'll be right.

It'll be right. No, it'll be the sold-out show, Costantino. Oh, my God. It's one of those things where you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, we can do it. And then when it finally rolls around, I'm oh my god we put that it's one of those things where you're like yeah yeah yeah we can do it and then when it

finally rolls around I'm like oh god it's happening I was saying to Ben we need a routine because we're all talking over each other

at the same time at the moment we need like a dude it's tomorrow yeah like the routine should have been we should have done it

by now yeah no a bit of a routine you know when you have your little spiel, Ben will come in with us, because you're blindfolded. You can't see when we're about to talk. No, I can't. So we'll sort

that all out, but it's going to be pretty amazing. Last time we did it, we nailed it, guys. That's the one time we've nailed it. We haven't done it again since. Can't do it again. We don't want to do one today and then not nail and have that seed of doubt planted

yeah true things are looking good so far so yeah oh that's that's tomorrow so we'll keep you up to speed got costumes

yeah we got some costumes yeah yeah that's that's one part yeah we'll be good to go guys enjoy the podcast yes there's a bit of an issue actually before we get into

the podcast for the afternoon show and the Christmas countdown calendar we have in the studio take a listen I'm not sure how many sleeps to Christmas because the well we've got a little chart little cubes in the studio. Take a listen. I'm not sure how many sleeps to Christmas because we've got a little chart,

little cubes in the studio. I don't know. It's not on the number that tells me exactly, right? Because someone's messing with it and that's causing a lot of grief for the afternoon show. It's two cubes that sit in the corner of the studio that have numbers on it. And you rotate them.

Rotate it, count down the days. Did you say it was 19 days till Christmas? I don't know. It's hard to tell. It's not what it says over there. It's Manny McLean's personal Christmas countdown decoration. And every

morning, someone on this team changes it to an unruly number. One below the number 70. What's wrong with 69? I didn't realise it had been changed every day I just thought it just stayed on there I didn't realise it had been a sort of back and forth thing But something had been going on

Yeah, and I was just sitting in the car yesterday Got a call out of the blue from Maddy and PJ Well, I changed the numbers to correlate with whatever day How many sleeps it is And then every day I get into the studio And someone from the breakfast team has changed the blocks to say a very childish 69. Wait, hang on.

Are you fairly pointing the finger here? Or could it be like a cleaner coming through the building at night, having a bit of a lull? I mean, it could be, but I feel like there is probably only one answer for who this possibly could be. So Jono Pryor from the Breakfast team is with us now. Jono! Have I hit the nail on the head?

I'm substantiated. It is not me. I know who it is, but then I abide by the snitches. The snitches get something or stitches, and I can't say. Okay, there's someone on the team. Wait, so hand on heart, it's not you, Jono? I'm truly offended that I'm the first person you call. Are you really?

Are you not surprised? To be honest, I'd call myself too. Yes. So I didn't end up saying who it was. We all know who it is. Well, I do now. You didn't know who it was? I had no idea. I didn't end up saying who it was. We all know who it is. Well, I do now. You didn't know who it was? I had no idea. I didn't know either. So only you knew who it is, which

could implicate you again. Annoyed the hell out of me every day too. Yeah, well I think the person who was doing it initially was doing it to wind up me. Right, so I've internalised the annoyance to not give any credit or pleasure to that person.

Yeah, so, I mean, in this instance, this clears all three of us. Yeah. Yeah, all three of us. It feels like either that or we've got really strong stories that we're sticking to. But if you had to pick someone on the team...

Jono. Absolutely Jono. I'd pick myself too. Yeah, 100%. Especially that number two. Yeah, yeah. I'm above that lowbrow human thing. Whatever.

You know, he'd be like, oh, look, guys, look what I've done. Hey, hey. I'm above that lowbrow humor thing. Whatever. He'd be like, oh, look, guys, look what I've done. Hyena sophisticated brand of comedy, thank you. A hundred percent, Jono. I still, even though he's got this backstory about it, I still think it's probably Jono. You still think it's me? It's probably Jono. So, yeah, I thought as a show we should take it to the grave

until further investigations find out who it actually is. Yeah, we don't snitch on our own show. No, but then that implicates everyone else. This is the thing. If it's like, we're all in this together, like, well, no, I'm not. Stop me. There you go.

That's telling, isn't it? Wait, so if we're on a ship, I'm not sure. If we're on a ship, and, like, the ship was going to sink unless you narked someone out, you'd be like, oh, yeah, 100%, I'm getting off. It's Jono. Oh, well, yeah, 100%, I'm getting off. It's Jono.

Oh, well, yeah, if it's life or death. We all go down together. If I could save the Titanic. Yeah, listen, he's jumping in front of the women and babies when it gets to the life raft. Let me out of here. Out of the way. I'm just making sure no one gets to the women and babies stage.

You're Billy Zane in the Titanic. I'm like, guys, it's Jono. No, I don't think on this occasion it is Jono, actually. Yeah, well, I want them to try And figure it out Through a process Of elimination So no doubt

You two are going To get calls Okay now Ben We're all in this together This is like those police When they split you up Into different interrogation rooms We've all got the same story

Okay The hits The Jono and Ben podcast It'll call the weather Around the country It's not going to be raining Or anything like that For the most part of New Zealand, but things are not quite as hot as they've been the last couple of days.

She's got cookie-timed yesterday. Annual event, isn't it? Get the 19 and 20-year-olds, the early 20-year-olds, hustling for some cash. They're very good, eh? I got cookie-timed yesterday. They're very good. The person that cookie-timed me the other day, she was very good. Oh, the biscuits are delicious.

Yeah, and no, she was really good. No, you mean the person selling. Yeah, she was great. Yeah, the guy selling was very good. Oh, their biscuits are delicious. Yeah, and no, she was really good. No, you mean the person selling. Yeah, she was great. Yeah, the guy selling was very good for me, too. Very charismatic, also. She's like, I want to be the number one cookie time seller in the country and stuff. I was like, oh, this is so ambitious. Do you know, on average, the top seller made $37,000 last year.

Really? Wait. Do you get bonuses for how many you sell? I think so, yeah. Oh, that's why they're so good at it. Yeah, they're really good at it. Yeah at it It's better than the UNICEF people Because at least you get a packet of biscuits They're so good at what they're doing

One's selling cookies The other's doing charity Are they giving me cookies though? At the end of it? What's happened to the charity one-off donation? I don't know Where has that gone? I'm all for giving to charity as well at the end of it? What's happened to the charity one-off donation? What's happened to that? Where has that gone? Like, I'm all for giving to charity as well,

but there is a lot of charities, and they're all amazing. But what's happened to just the one-off, I'll give you $20 right now, or whatever, $10. Because it's hard to commit to something monthly, whereas I can go, okay, right now, yeah,

I've got maybe $20 I can spend. Bring off the one-off. Yeah, bring it back. It's like, if we want to give a one-off, Nobody did it. Direct debits, no. It's like, if we want to give a one-off to this. No bloody direct debits. It's like trying to find a number to call someone on a website. I'm looking, Ben. You can't.

Jangle a bucket in front of me any day. Yeah, you're like, hey, whatever. I'll do it. Yeah, okay. It's fine. But no, you want to have to sign up for 12 months. And it's great for people to do. But you can't sign up to every charity.

No. Anyway, sorry. Cook your time up. No, I was just saying. Really, that marks for me the beginning of Christmas, when you start seeing university students hustling cookies on the footpath. What flavour did you get? Oh, I'll go on the range. You know, you can get the apricot ones, you get the white chocolate ones.

Oh, can you get one all in together? No, but you get different buckets. Oh, so have you got one of everything? Well, not one of everything. I end up with three or four buckets worth, though. I went niche. Where did you go? Brandy snap.

Oh. Those things are legit. It's like a tiny little brandy snap cookie. Good on them. I never know, too, because they say, hey, have a sample. And they've got the whole range on them. How much can you sample before you're just eating all this supply? Yeah, the people before me were sitting there having a good old much.

The guy was like, so you're going to buy an E? Maybe that's the thing you sample. You go, well, that was lovely. Thank you. And then away you go. Text in if you're a cookie time sales rep. You're out there on the streets hustling the cookies. How much money are you pulling in every year?

Because $37,000 is wild. That's a lot. It's only over a very short, what, four to six week period. What are we doing? I'm going to do that next year. Grand is wild. That's a lot. It's only over a very, what, four to six week period. What are we doing? I'm going to do that next year. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. People talking yesterday about their Spotify wrapped list, putting it out.

Even the Prime Minister was doing it as well, reflecting on his Spotify playlist. And he got some grief. Who was his top artist? Not just, I mean, mean the artist was pretty like it was quite a good range it was like Dua Lipa Post Malone there was some Billy Joe on there

it was less about who he was he was championing it was more about how have you got time to listen to music and the more important things you should be doing

like running the country so yeah so that was the big he probably spends a lot of time driving and can you listen to music and read at the same time?

I don't know, but people like that. You run in the country, you can't have any fun. Yeah, exactly. Well, have you got time to eat? You're meant to be running the country. That's when they see sports players out on a Wednesday night having dinner. What are you doing eating dinner? You lost last week.

You're a rugby game instead of me, mate. You're right, you're right. Okay. Now, you've got a very interesting thing you want to bring to our attention today a competition that's taking place overseas yeah it's the partner calling championships so you know how everyone or everyone listening and everyone in this room right now has a way that they call out their partner jen my wife i'll be like jen jen jen you know from one room to another do you call like that sometimes Sometimes on repeat And then I'll get a

She'll give me back a Jay Or then if I've done You know if I've Screwed something up In a room that she's in Jonathan It'll come out

Oh yeah It'll come out How about you guys? I don't want to say You go Oh no Yours will be like You lose good snookers

Oh yeah it would be My wife is As we've talked about She's really good at've talked about she's really good at whistling like she's a great whistler and

amazing but I hate being whistled at oh it was and she will be somewhere and she probably has said Ben

in her defense but I just haven't heard that and then she'll whistle and I'm like I'm not turning around

for a whistle I am not turning around and she'll whistle again I'm not and the other night we were picking up the kids from the theatre. There was hundreds of kids and someone was whistling.

She goes, that's annoying. And I'm like, oh, now it's annoying. And I was like, oh. I am not turning around. Go whistle. That's what you do to me. But anyway, calm down, Ben. Calm down, Ben.

And everyone also sometimes pretends to not hear. Yeah, that's what I do. I get whistled at. But there's a competition, right? Yeah, so you can enter and basically it's ranked first, second, third about who calls out their partner the best. That would get annoying. That's worse than a whistle.

Bob, Bob, Bob! Hurry up! I don't want to be late! Yeah, I know. That's a good one. It's a beauty. Here we go. A yoohoo's like when you walk inside someone's house and you want to be polite.

Yeah. Can you hear me? Yeah, that's a good one. You get yourself in here right now. Come on. You know you're going to be late again. Yeah, so that's the partner calling championships. So this is going to be a bit of high concept stuff.

0800-THE-HITS-4487. You phone up with how you call out your partner, or maybe it might be easier for you to tell us how your partner calls out to you. Yeah. We'd love to hear from you this morning. Play our game with us. And you can go along to watch the game. Thanks to the Auckland FC, we've got an upgrade.

It's sold out already. We haven't just got GA tickets. We've got some passes to go see them play in the lounge as well. Double pass. They don't play football in the lounge. No, no. They play football on the field. You can see from the lounge, which is pretty incredible,

the Black Knights lounge. So if you want a double pass, we'll give it to our favourite caller next. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. And, Jono, you found out there's a partner calling world champs going on overseas. Yeah, I want to thank my algorithm on Instagram for feeding me this content. They line up all of their finalists and they get up there and try and call out their partner the best they can.

Living with someone going, you who, you who, and then your name. That would... Can you hear me? You get yourself in here right now! I like it. Come on! You know you're going to be late again. They sound like the type of couple that I imagine they just bicker about minor details of stories when they're relaying a story, you know? Yeah. No, Ken wasn't wearing the grey jumper that day, you know?

Yeah, I know. Points that don't really matter, but anyway, they love doing it. All right, so we want to find out how you call your partner, and we'll get some calls on. We've got that double pass to the Auckland FC as well, too. Yeah, we're going to go – let's go Beck first, shall we? Morning to you, Beck. How are you?

I'm very good. Good morning. Now, is this how you call out your partner, or is this how your partner calls out you? How I call my partner. Okay morning. Now, is this how you call out your partner, or is this how your partner calls out you? How I call my partner. Okay, take it away. Hun. Hun.

Hun. Hun. Hunny. Hun. Hun, hun, hun. Yeah, different variations on repeat. And does he ignore you until the huns start to get a little bit more intense? Yeah, they get shorter and more high-pitched.

Yeah. Do you ever revert to, like, his full name at the end? Oh, yes. Yeah, definitely. That really works quite well. Yeah. Sometimes you just like to ignore it to hear your name repeated multiple times in varying levels of aggression.

What was yours, Megan? You don't even use each other's names, you and Andrew. No, if he called me Megan, I'd be like, oh, God, what's happened? Oh, really? Do you want to hear it? Yeah, it'll be like spoof muffin or something. Oh, no. It's not?

It's just baby. Baby. Oh, yeah. Hey, baby. Hey, baby. Oh, God. The back and forth baby, baby, is it? Yeah, pretty much.

Okay, let's get Sears on. How are you? Good. Yourself? Did I nail your name, Sears? Sears. Like Sears the store. Oh, Sears.

Sears. Oh, gotcha. Well, then no, I didn't nail your name. Okay, is you calling your partner out or your partner calling you out? My partner calling me out. Okay, here we go. This is risky territory. Yeah, so my partner uses

the baboon mating call. When a baboon gets an orgasm, and it goes, and this is how you get called out, do you? Yeah, particularly in a shopping mall. I like that. Well, at least you know it's for you.

It's like the whistle. It's very unique. Yeah, but the problem is mates have also caught on to it. So you're getting mocked for it, are you? Yeah, in a way. Very good, Sears. Appreciate it. And Laurie, you are on the air. How are you? Hi, good, thanks. Yeah, good to C.S. Appreciate it. And Laurie, you are on the air.

How are you? I'm good, thanks. Yeah, good to have you on. Is it Laurie or Laurie? Laurie. She's on a truck. Sorry, Laurie. I've had a shocker.

Two from two there. I don't know why you read the names. Just don't, because it's like 20% you're right and 80% you're wrong. It's the thrill of it. Megan, you can maybe start doing that soon. Laurie, is this how you call your partner? It's how

I call my entire family, really, when I'm in a big public area or anywhere that everybody's names are the same because my husband's got quite a common name, it's Matthew. But, yeah, if there's quite a big crowd, I normally scream out, Cuckoo! Cuckoo! My entire family knows it's me.

Cuckoo! They're all getting older now, so they're all like, oh, my God. Yeah, I do love the cuckoo! Yeah. Everyone turns around. I've been doing it foroo. Yeah. Everyone turns around. I've been doing it for years. That's brilliant. Well, you can –

You can't look who's doing it, but everybody knows – my whole family knows it's me, and they're just like, so I like to sneak in. Love it, Laurie. Well, you can be cuckooing this weekend at the Auckland FC. Awesome. Thank you. Yeah, we're going to give you a double pass.

Not just the GA tickets. They've got the Black Knights lounge tickets, the double pass as well. It's a sold-out game. That's amazing. Only if you promise to pass, not just to GA tickets. They've got the Black Knights lounge tickets to double pass as well. It's a sold-out game. That's amazing. Only if you promise to do the ca-ca in there. Once you score a goal, you've got to bust out a ca-ca. I'll be screaming ca-ca.

It might catch on. It might be the new war cry. I love it. Good on you. Laurie, have a great weekend. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. All the Santa parades have been happening around the country. The Christchurch one was in the news because Santa had to wear a seatbelt

in the parade, travelling at five kilometres an hour. Devil's advocate. How high? Because you know Santa sometimes sits really high on the sled. Was he really high up? I don't know. The organiser of the parade's like, this has been going for 150 years or something.

He's like, no Santa has ever fallen off, or elves, or anyone has ever fallen off a float travelling at one and a half kilometres an hour. And someone has also done the maths on how fast Santa, you know, Santa would need to go on Christmas Eve, and it's like 160 million kilometres an hour. But do we know that he doesn't have a seatbelt in his sleigh? No, we don't.

Yeah, it's a good question. But we don't think he does. Yeah. And not to fat shame Santa, but I mean, it's a lot of Santa to get a seatbelt around too, isn't it? I think the sleigh's custom made. Oh, it is. Yeah.

All the times I've seen images of Santa in his sleigh, never seen a seatbelt. No. Maybe he's got one of those little lat ones. Yeah, a little lat belt. But you can't see him because his guts are off. Okay, we just said we were going to fat shame Santa.

Oh, sorry. Big old jolly guts dangling over the sea belt. They call him the jolly fat man. I think he's okay with it, right? Yeah, he's chilled.

It's fine if he's chilled with it, isn't it? That's right. Makes it all better, the bullying? Maybe not. Maybe not. We'll hear that in 20 years.

The police would have an interesting encounter with Santa, wouldn't they, on Christmas Eve? He's definitely drunk behind the wheel, too. There's a lot of people leaving out stuff. Anyway.

Accusations. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Now I want to talk about something I'm doing that I've just gotten onto. Now I'm at the next stage, unlike you, Megan, you know, who just you're earlier on in your parenting journey, right? Yeah. And I'm at the next stage where I've got a teenage daughter and another soon-to-be teenage daughter.

A tween? Yeah, a tween and a teen. And so I'm at that stage and I'm getting to next stage where I've got a teenage daughter and another soon-to-be teenage daughter. A tween? A tween and a teen. Yeah, a tween and a teen. And so I'm at that stage and I'm getting to enjoy all the things that particularly my dad used to enjoy. Like I was talking to you the other day about how I like to just toot at random kids from their school or whatever. And I'll look away. It's so mean. And they look.

They look when driving the car. They look directly eye contact every time. And for them, that's so embarrassing. It's the worst, yeah. When you think about it in the grand scheme of things i'm like it's not really that embarrassing i'll figure that out eventually but right now they're in that uh awkward seven years where you just don't want to be noticed and they're just trying to fit in at school and you're making it hard but i've really cottoned on to that now because you know dropping them off at a friend's place or whatever thing

like that it's always that and i did it so i'll just stop here just stop here i'm like no no no i'll take you right up to the door we'll drive up the driveway drive up the drive oh I think it's such a good reaction but no no no stop here it's a joke it's like no no no and I'm always like do it as it no it's fine it's fine it's fine I can take you all the way to the door and they're like no stop here and you can go all the way up you can give a little couple toots you can do yeah see you later yell out some stuff it's so much fun. Even as an adult, that is just horrifying. Imagine if I was dropping you off somewhere and I drove you right up to the door and then tooted. I appreciate people who drive right up to the door.

I know I was the same. Why is it so embarrassing? And I was thinking about it. I was telling my daughter about this. You got dropped off at school and your mum or dad took you close. That was embarrassing. But then the days you forgot your lunch and they had to bring that why was that why was that embarrassing i know like you want to pretend that you're an orphan don't you when you're that age and that i don't know why but your parents are so embarrassing at that age you just like you pretend they don't exist yeah so you embrace it like i am really enjoying it it's either two ways either you can cry because they you know they get embarrassed or you can just go, you know what?

This is my greatest joy. It's getting noticed. Two of his greatest joys, bullying and fat shaming Santa, and tormenting his children. That's right. That's right. It'll all be in therapy at some stage. It'll all be my fault.

But anyway, things I like to do. I can deal with that at the back end. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Into the Christmas party season, we wanted to learn a party trick because we realised we didn't have one. Cosentino, the magician from Australia, taught us a trick, a card trick involving cards, blindfolds, pocket knives. It's got it all.

And then he decided he would let us on stage. And we're doing that tomorrow. He's playing in Auckland tonight. He didn't decide. You bullied him into it. I did, actually. You're right. You said, let's put some jeopardy on this. We were't decide. You bullied him into it. I did, actually. You're right.

Let's put some jeopardy on this. We were both happy just learning the trick and impressing people around the office. Yeah, I know. Christmas party. I really thought we needed to focus. We needed to knuckle it down. I regret that now, guys. I mean, hey, last time we did it,

we haven't done it in a couple of days, we nailed it. Is this your card? Matty Langlois. It is. Now, the trick involves All three of us Three stages of the trick And uh

99% of the time We've screwed it up Not Megan So when we When we celebrate like that I was also celebrating The fact that like I was like

Yes John Owen Ben Didn't stuff it up You're like None of us Stuffed it up So tomorrow's Tomorrow's show day Uh

And Oh my god We just wanted to check in On how the ticket sales Were going, didn't we? So after the program yesterday, we thought we'd call the Bruce Mason Centre. If you want to come along, you can actually text MAGIC to 4487. But here's how they're going. Kia ora.

You're speaking with Laurel. Oh, g'day. Laurel, how are you? I'm fine, thanks. How can I help? How can I help you? It's Jono, Ben and Megan here. You'll know us as the performers who will be appearing on your stages, gracing your stages Saturday afternoon.

Okay. Yeah, Cosentino's a magician, and we're going to be performing with him on stage. We've learnt one magic trick. We just wanted to see how the ticket sales were going. You know, might be a bit of a boost with us being up there maybe? Right. Just say, yep, they are flying out the door.

I actually don't have access to that. Oh, yeah. I can only see what you can see. I'm struggling to get tickets, to be honest. Has anyone called up and asked for the magic show with John O'Beta-Megan? Not when I've been here. I've been on holiday. Probably why.

Probably been flooded. You might not have opened your emails yet. If you open up your emails, I'm sure. Ping, ping, ping, ping, ping, ping. Lots of emails coming through. Who do we give our backstage demands to? Is that you? Sorry?

You what? Our backstage demands, what we require in the dressing room. I can see if the event planner is available. Yeah. 1,000% Egyptian cotton pillows. Do you want some pillows? Yeah, pillows would be nice. Yeah, pillows.

A few pillows. Maybe some white flowers.? Yeah, pillows would be nice. Yeah, pillows. A few pillows. Maybe some white flowers. White flowers. Puppies. Yeah. Those puppies would be nice. Yeah, some puppies. Okay.

All right, we'll leave that with you. Okay. Okay, all right. Well, lovely to have you. Thank you so much for having us as part of your amazing event. We appreciate it. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, the Mariah carey game we started

it was probably a month ago to be honest to see how long we could we could all go avoiding a mariah carey song all i want for christmas now the game is officially ended as far as we're concerned on the hits radio station we are now playing the song but if you are still playing the game because you can still play the game if you want you probably don't want to listen to the next couple of minutes of radio. Paul, you're still in. I certainly am. Can't believe it. Well, you're going to need to switch off after we chat to you because we're going to play some stuff in just a moment that

features it. But how have you done this? How have you managed to avoid Moriah? Pure statistics. So I only listen to you guys on the radio and as soon as you finish, I put it on Spotify, which is my own playlist. I don't have social media. I don't do Christmas shopping, so I'm a perfect solution to the problem.

You're the perfect candidate to avoid Mariah Carey. Well done. Yeah, my wife does all the shopping for Christmas online, and it turns up every day. So I am, yeah, the only social media app I've got is my weather app. I would love to see your face on Christmas Day, you know, when your family have gifted presents to others and you have to pretend

like you know what's inside the wrapper. Oh no, I'm just as surprised as the kids are. And just between me and you, she's definitely buying things for herself in that online shopping. It's the perfect rose. I do it too. Well, Paul, well done.

I've been very long enough to not be that naive to think she's not shopping for herself. It's the tax you have to pay. Congratulations. Lasting a lot longer than we all could in the game. As I said, we're about to play a little bit of Mariah, so you want to switch off about now for a couple of minutes, all right? All right. Thank you, Paul. Have a great Christmas, mate. Appreciate it. it has been a wonderful last four weeks hasn't it

yeah it has in the Mariah Carey game we started as you say it and we've been oh we were sabotaged by Tasha Littlesna it's been a wild ride have a listen the game is that we all have to try and avoid listening or hearing Mariah Carey's all I Want for Christmas. I was scrolling through TikTok and there was Mariah Carey, All I Want. TikTok got you. Shannon works in retail. Shannon. Have you heard it yet? No, I haven't.

Kaylee Bell, country music superstar. She was out as quick as she joined. Hey, guys. I'd probably give it about an hour. After I was on air with you guys, jumped in the car and a Christmas ad came on the radio and I was really sad. Oh, I'm out now, guys. Yep. Katrina, are you out?

Yeah. Devastated, mate. The commiseration version for you. No, no, no, no. It makes it worse, Isaac, hey. It's just like, it's her. Maddie McLean. I was away for one day, and now I find out that I can't listen to my favourite Christmas song.

I have to steer clear of Mariah in general, which is very, very hard for a gay man to do. Breaking news. We go to the ads. I do what we all do. Just go straight back to our phones and devices and sit in silence in between songs. Then I'm scrolling on Instagram, and I thought, this is a funny sketch. I wonder if there's any audio attached to it. Oh no. And I foolishly did not look at the soundtrack

that was playing. Oh, so he's the art of the game. The Santa Parade Sunday and on the float. You just discovered two days ago that the song was going to be Mariah Carey's All I Want for Christmas. So people in charge of that float were just going to absolutely sabotage myself, Ben and Maddie who are still in the game.

For all of you to be able to sleep soundly for the next couple of nights, before the event on Sunday, I can confirm that there has been a late change to the song. Tasha is our favourite person in the world right now. So she phoned through to the afternoon, Maddy and PJ, on an unrelated topic, belting out Mariah down the phone. You are kidding me! You are kidding me! Tasha! I was half asleep on the couch having a cat nap, and I went, oh my gosh.

It's meant to be a safe space, wasn't it, the hits? Yes. Welcome into the studio. Tasha has given us her word haven't you i'm not gonna do it oh oh oh she got me she's done it again you said it was a safe space let's get meeker on morning how are you oh don't leave it it's tasha oh megan is out of the game Blaze of glory And that has been the journey

It has been fun It has been It's so much fun We're definitely going to do it again next year We're going to build some rules With your help About things that are allowed Like can you sabotage

As we're calling it Can some people sabotage Or maybe you can't I reckon merch as well Yeah getting some merch in the game I'm in I'm out It's great And thank you to Al and Ali Who put that montage together And this is the last time Maybe you can't. I reckon merch as well. Yeah, getting some merch in the game too. I'm in, I'm out. It's great.

And thank you to Elle and Ellie who put that montage together. And this is the last time we'll be able to play this. I don't want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing I need. And I don't care about. Play four of it if you want. I love how you're like, and I. I don't care. The Hits you're like, and I, and Gordon. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

A lot of people talking about their Spotify rap, which is their top songs and songs they listen to throughout the year. Didn't you say Post Malone was in the Prime Minister's? It was, yeah. Joe Lepa, Billy Joel, a whole lot of us. George Ezra, I think as well. He kind of went through his Spotify rap for the year. And a lot of people going, oh, mate, run the country. Spend your time doing more important things.

Less time listening to Pour Me a Drink featuring Blake Shelton. Yeah. Sometimes you just need to run a country. But, Megan, you've made some amazing statistics. Probably this blew you away. Oh, yeah, it really did. The fact that I'm in the top 3% of Taylor Swift listeners worldwide. Yeah.

Yeah, it surprised me to be honest. Look, I know you're a fan of Taylor Swift, but there are so many mega fans of Taylor Swift. Yeah. So what, top 3% of people? Top 3%, apparently. What does that mean, stats wise? How much Taylor Swift have you listened to over the last 12 months? Well, she was my top artist.

I don't know if it told me exactly how many hours I'd listen to her. There's also a list of people that Taylor Swift avoids and gets restraining orders against as well. Maybe, yeah, you're right. She's like, oh, yeah, good to know those names and numbers. But she sent you a personalised thank you note. You guys have made a lot out of this. Well, you sent Taylor Swift to send me a video call message.

I didn't get one from Taylor Swift. No, I didn't get one either. Now, this was actually in response to you being in the top 3% of Taylor Swift listeners in the world. This is to Megan from Taylor Swift. Well, hi. I just wanted to say thank you so much for being one of my top listeners on Spotify. That's so nice of you. I look back on this year and I think about how special you guys made it for us being on the Eros Tour.

Went all over the world. We went to Europe, Australia, Asia, through America, then to Canada. And so thank you if you came to see the show. Thank you for streaming the music. It's just been such a wild ride. And I really appreciate everything you guys have done, including listening to my music so much. Well, this lovely person. Actually, if you do this.

Well, hi. Megan. Well, there's a lovely person. Actually, if you do this. Well, hi. Megan. Well, hi. Megan. I just wanted to say thank you so much for being one of my top. There you go. She could have put my name in there. It would have been awesome.

She could have gone through and recorded a few extra versions with different names. But that's pretty cool, actually, that you got that. Yeah. I was very surprised. She seems like a lovely person. We were talking to Nicole, who's an American correspondent. You would know we talked to her weekly on the show.

This is something we talked about. We haven't played this, actually, have we? She got to interview Taylor Swift a couple of times. This is such a lovely thing that Taylor Swift did after the interview. I have a handwritten note from her from the first time I ever interviewed her. She took the time to write a note and be like, thank you so much. It meant the world to me that you took the time to hang out with, hang out with me and listen to my music and play my music. It's like, she's been like that from the beginning,

just like grateful and just like a good kid. So yeah, for every album she sent, she sent gifts. She sends New Year's cards to us. She doesn't forget the people who helped her on the way up. Jeez, I tell you what, Taylor Swift appreciates her fans more than most bosses appreciate their employees. Yeah. That is pretty incredible.

So we wanted to know this morning, 0800 the HATS or 4487, who did you get a message from? Like, did you get a letter? Did you get a video message? Someone famous. A guy that we know, he's been on the show before. We've actually all talked to him about he's trying to get people to record their dreams every day. 10,000 dreams. Oh, Fraser.

Fraser Grew. Talked to him about he's trying to get people to record their dreams every day. 10,000 dreams. Or Fraser. Fraser grew. And he got a handwritten message from Sir David Attenborough the other day. Like a letter. He approached him and said, would you do a video message about your dream? Got a handwritten letter back. He said no. He said no, he wouldn't do the video dream. Which confused me.

It's like, well, if David Attenborough is not wanting to participate in the video, why go to the trouble of a handwritten letter? Sending it from London. I know. It's a big journey. Tell him about email, maybe? But still, he was pretty appreciative that he'd taken the time even to give a letter.

That is the most polite no that you'll ever get. Exactly. A handwritten letter. A handwritten letter. So have you got a message? Maybe someone listening has got a message from, you know, had a message from the Queen or the King. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

I don't know who you got a message from. Which famous person? Megan got a video message from Taylor Swift. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. I don't know who you got a message from. Which famous person? Megan got a video message from Taylor Swift. She did. Yeah, that's so did everyone. It's personalised. Well, hi. Megan.

I just wanted to say thank you so much for being one of my top listeners on Spotify. That's so nice of you. Three percent. Top three percent of the world. That is, when you do break it down, that would be a phenomenal amount of Taylor Swift you've listened to. Yeah, yep, it probably is. But I didn't go to the Ears tour. Right, so you just cranked it at home.

That was a big commitment. Doesn't break it down into minutes per minutes how long you've listened? Doesn't give those stats? They'd be frightening figures. Yeah, I listen to songs over and over and over and over again too. I listen to one song for half an hour. I do that, I do that. To the point when you're like, oh, I'm done with that now.

Yeah, yeah. Okay, so we want to know who you've had a message from, famous people that you've had a message from. You can win tickets to the Auckland FC sold-out Wellington Phoenix Auckland FC game this weekend. Yeah, we've got a double pass for the lounge. Not just the GA. They've upgraded it to the lounge, which is pretty awesome.

Yeah. Are you lounge worthy Lucy? I sure am, absolutely You're not going to besmirch the good name of the hits In the corporate lounge? No, of course not, I'd be on my best behaviour Oh good on you Now who have you received a message from?

It was none other than George Bush US President George Bush Yeah, it's a bit random. It's very random. You wrote a physical letter to him. Yeah, so I was about seven and 9-11 had just happened and obviously I was seeing it all over the news and things. And I had asked my mum something along the lines of,

you know, what can we do? And she had the idea, oh, why don't you write to the president and, you know, give your condolences and all that. So I remember I wrote a letter and drew him a picture with my crayons and sent it off didn't think anything of it and then a few months later a courier comes and knocks on our door with this huge orange envelope with like an embossed wax stamp that said the White House no way oh god here we go and yes George Bush And the strangest thing about it was he included like this really glossy,

like headshot of himself. And in my letter, I had said that, you know, I'm seven, I'm from New Zealand. So it was kind of bizarre. I included this photo. Put that over your wall, kid. Was it signed or just a headshot? Yeah.

And it's like, yeah, like it was like probably like an A3 size. Like it was really big. Wow, a glossy headshot. And by courier too, that must be costing the White House a fortune. It's so impressive they do that, like all the way in New Zealand. Yeah, and it had like a big piece of cardboard in it to keep everything straight so it didn't bend. And what did the letter say to you?

Basically just, you know, that he was really grateful that someone all the way in New Zealand was thinking of him. And then I remember he signed it off with, God bless you and God bless America. Oh, man, you don't get more USA than that. God bless New Zealand. Oh, that's so cool. Hey, we're going to send you along.

That's such an amazing call to the Auckland FC this weekend. Awesome, thank you so much. Sold out game, the Wellington Phoenix, Auckland FC. It's going to send you along. That's such an amazing call to the Auckland FC this weekend. Awesome. Thank you so much. Sold out game, the Wellington Phoenix, Auckland FC. It's going to be incredible. So you will enjoy that, I'm sure. Oh, thanks, guys. Have a great day. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

You may have seen the trailer for this. It's called Better Man. This is a little snippet of it. I'm Robbie Williams. I'm one of the biggest pop stars in the world this is my story but i'm not gonna tell it in an ordinary way because i don't see myself how others see me in the next two hours your house is mine to be honest i've always been a little less evolved. I don't want to rock. So let's take it from the top, shall we? It looks high concept.

Yeah. So he didn't want to do the movie, but the director of The Greatest Showman came to him with the concept that he would be portrayed as a CGI monkey. Now, stay with me. That, to me, sounded weird. I saw this poster at the movie,

but I didn't have any idea it was a Robbie Williams movie. Right. So he's a monkey everyone else is just actors normal actors but he is a CGI monkey which is done by

Weta Workshop in New Zealand had the director been watching Sing the animated movie because the singing monkey is a very popular

character through that and the gorilla is that the gorilla yeah very good maybe you just gone hey that's a great idea I thought it would be

really annoying I was like I just want Robbie in there so everyone else is normal everyone else is just actors normal Yeah, very good. Maybe he just gone, hey, that's a great idea. I thought it would be really annoying. I was like, I just want Robbie in there. So everyone else is normal? Everyone else is just actors, normal. And Robbie voices over the monkey. Is there a backstory to the monkey? So that's what he just explained. He was like, I've kind of always felt like a little bit unevolved

and a little bit like an ape. I guess like a dancing monkey. Gotcha. Ah, I see the connection. So you very quickly forget that it's a monkey. I was about to ask you, like, yeah, does that wear off pretty quickly? Yeah.

And it kind of looks like him in some ways. So an acted story about his life by the monkey is the main character. And because it's done by the guy that did The Greatest Showman, these huge musical numbers and they incorporate the music throughout his life. But if you think you know that he's been through we all know he's been through his struggles yeah i

didn't know the half of it it's so traumatic it's very sad what happens to him early on and his relationship with his father is really difficult and i cried a lot really? I have a lot of respect for him now. Crying over a CGI monkey. I know. But it's like, it's really good. I really liked it. Am I in there? I passed him once at the corridor at work about 15 years ago, and I said, hey, man.

And he said, you all right? And that was it. You all right? Did they put that scene in there? Maybe. I must have missed it. I was trying to play it really cool, too, because everyone was like, I really want to go.

I'm a big fan. I went, hey, man. But yeah. And he went, you're right. You're right. Did you say you're right? He seemed nice. He smiled too.

You know, you're right. How did you say you were? I didn't say anything else. I should have. I was trying to play it really cool, but I wasn't cool at all. So I'm not in there? I reckon they might have edited that.

It might be in the extended cut. Yeah, director's cut. Good to know. I reckon Baz Luhrmann would have shown that one. Might have been a bit of a musical number. Oh, good. Oh, good. You're right, mate.

It felt like it was leading that way. Yeah, and I'll go away and sing how I really wanted to do more. Yeah, that sounds all right. It breaks off into another storyline of Rando who passed. Who missed his moment. Who missed his moment. Who's trying to play it too cool. He's gone home. His wife passed him. Who missed his moment. Who missed his moment. Who started like, too cool. He got home, his wife left him.

Oh, what, you didn't make the most of your moment? The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Had an enjoyable afternoon, yesterday afternoon, I took my daughter to her swimming lessons, and one of the classes, the swimming instructor was teaching the kids how to dive into the pool. So diving from the blocks into the pool, and they're all on debut.

All on debut. And you know when you first try to dive into a pool, it's terrifying. You put your arms up at a point and then you kind of crouch and lean forward. And he's coaching them all and they're all fastidiously doing this on the side of the pool.

And then one after one. Bang! Oh, belly flops. Bang! And it gets toops, yeah. Bang! And it gets to the point where all the parents around the pool are like, ooh, ooh, ooh. You know, it's like a piece of steak slapping against a window. Just the sound.

No one was in the pool. But to their credit, they'd get out of the pool and they'd do it. Bang! But you never want to let on it hurts. That's the thing with belly flops. No. You're like, ooh, no, no, it was all good, all good. And you're like, jeez, it's so sore. And they come up with their facial expressions

like confusion, pain, and a little bit of pride that they managed to do it. Is it supposed to feel like that? Did I do it? I mean, there's only one way to get better at it. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. The weekend, of course, the cricket's on.

The Blackcaps taking on England in a huge football game between the Wellington Phoenix and the Auckland FC. The new team, the Auckland FC, five in a row, and no one scored a goal against them. And we've got the CEO, Nick Becker, with us. How incredible is that? No, no.

I know, team. How good is that? Couldn't be going better. We're obviously stoked. In your wildest dreams, would you have ever expected the club to be in this position? Like, in all honesty? No, like, in my wildest dreams,

if you'd asked me to write down, you know, we're going to have over the first four home matches, like nearly 80,000 Auckland FC fans come through the gates. We're, you know, sitting 5-0. No one actually scoring against us here is the phenomenal part. I mean, all of it's fantastic, but the fact that we've had five clean sheets is really impressive. And you know what? It builds amazing confidence amongst the boys as well. It's really cool. I went along last week and watched the game.

First time I experienced it live. And even in, you know, it wasn't great conditions with the weather, but just the fans are incredible. The chants, the cheering. You ever did one where they faced, I don't know why they were facing the other way in chanting, but everyone in the whole stand were doing it? Yeah, that's called the Poznan. It started like a little Polish team did it, and then it's been picked up

by a few teams around the world. I used to work at Manchester City, and Man City fans did the Poznan in the Premier League as well. So it's brilliant to see it down here at Go Media. Now, because you did mention when we first spoke to you, as you were just starting, the club hadn't even started and it was owned by, the majority shares owned by a US billionaire, Bill Foley, and he's got a whole bunch of very successful teams in America

and you said he's a results-based guy. You must be getting some friendly emails from Bill at the moment. Bill is and all the owners are really involved and they're all pretty happy. I'd be absolutely scratching my head if they weren't happy at this stage. What more do you

want from us? What could I do? You've got to ride the highs when they're there in sport and no one's got rose glasses to think that it's going to last forever. But definitely a long way to continue. Stephen Adams, he's one of the owners as well. Is he firing you some congratulatory texts? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He has been in touch with, he speaks more with our other owners, but he sent us a couple of messages saying what a fantastic start we've been up to, which is pretty impressive for a man as busy as he is. Yeah, awesome. It's amazing. This weekend, of course, two fabulous New Zealand teams taking on each other with the Wellington Phoenix taking on the Auckland FC. A sellout again, it's going to be amazing. Yes, yes.

It's broken the record for the biggest regular season crowd in A-League history in New Zealand. So that's fantastic. Every seat absolutely full. We've opened up the grass bank at the north end for families as well. Now, what's the age limit on the slide? Because I was there last week and I was sitting in the stand. It was wet conditions. But there's a slide that you've installed from people who know Go Media Stadium.

There's the bank, the grassy bank. There's a slide from the top down to the bottom. I'm like, geez, that looks fun. It is fun. And it's for kids of all ages. I've been on it a few times. Geez, the trajectory on that hill is, it's a steep hill.

Yeah, well, we've got a couple of catches at the end because there's a little bit of a drop-off, right? Thankfully, you do get a bit of pace, but the way that it's been designed, it means it kind of sort of bottoms out and and you don't go flying off the end so we we haven't um and i am uh touching wood here we haven't had any um any major incidents on it yet everyone loves it like it's there's a queue to go on it um all all pre-match and all through the game and then afterwards as well until we shut it off. Oh, that's good.

It reminds me of that, you know, when you're playing at your friend's house and their loose dad sets up the slip and slide. Mum's out and Mum comes home to you and you're sliding off over the other side of the road and some pretty tense conversations going on there. Yeah, there's always a rock underneath it when you get halfway through and you're like, oh, no. Oh, Nick, we can't wait for this weekend's game.

Auckland FC taking on the Wellington Phoenix, and good luck this weekend. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Islanders having the best weekend. Who's having the best weekend? The North or the South. We get two of our fine colleagues from the Hits radio station to tell us why their island is having the best weekend. Yeah, stepside North and South Korea.

We've got the North and South Islands bit of beef this morning. Hayley and Connor, good morning. Good morning. Merry Christmas. Oh, Merry Christmas. Can I just start? If Hayley mentions Auckland FC versus the Phoenix, I'm going to get my eardrums removed, all right? Just want to mention that.

Oh, it's an event. It's an event taking place. It's a huge event. In her island. But that's Connor in the South and Hayley in the North. That's why we have to have them on separate islands

because they are willing to fight to the death. Willing to get eardrums removed as well too. That's the commitment. Unless they don't have a football team. Okay, so that being said,

well, Connor. Connor sounds like he'd like to go first and put his best foot forward. Take it away for the South, Connor. Yeah, I would. We back charity here in the South Island. Better Man versus Movember at the charity T20 cricket match on Sunday

night at Hagley Oval. Kieran Reid's there, Todd Assel, Colin Slade, Aaron Major, Marty Banks, all the stars are out throwing the ball, hitting the ball to raise funds for Better Man, which is a local charity running mental health and skills workshops for young club athletes to deal with stresses in sport and in real life as well.

So that'll be great. That is lovely. He's coming with a charity angle there. That's very, very cool. Okay, what else? We also have the Life Cycle Bike Festival. I'm not sure, Megan, if you cycle around Nelson around this event

when you were young, maybe? I'm terrible on a bike. Yeah, okay. Yeah, maybe. Were you in the small kids balance bike event then, maybe? I'm terrible on a bike. Yeah, OK. Yeah, maybe. Were you in the small kids balance bike event then, maybe? Yeah, that sounds more like me. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's also Santa. He's there with the cycling shoes on, the Cycle Convoy Victory Community Centre. I guess there's Santa Parade and Nelson's a bunch of bikes around town. I guess that sounds about right. The Santa Parade and Nelson is legit. That sounded like a dig, Connor. It's very good.

No, no, no. It was great. It's awesome. I love Nelson. Nelson's great. It's very good. No, it was great. It's awesome. I love Nelson. Nelson's great. It's in the South Island, best place. Yeah, well, and eco-friendly. Too very Nelson to have a bike-themed Santa Parade.

Santa's like, you know, I've got a sleigh that really does a lot of heavy lifting for me, but if you want me to pedal, I'll pedal. Yeah, I can do that. Okay, that's two very good things happening in the South Island. Over to you, Hayley. What's happening in the North? Well, look, he has come in hard swinging, coming for the Santa Parade and charity move,

which is, you know, a little bit intimidating, but I'm feeling confident because it is all about Christmas, something maybe the South Island hasn't, you know, quite nailed yet. We have got in the capital, Wellington, Christmas in the quarters. So this Saturday, all on Queen's Walk on that beautiful waterfront. We've got a circus, extravaganza, there's face painting, Santa's letterbox, performances. So it's going to be an awesome day in the capital.

A little bit of wind, maybe, but, you know, nothing less than a candle. Not in Wellington. Now, I'm loving the sassiness between the two of you this morning. And what's your second event, Hayley? Well, my second event. Now, if I say iconic street in Wellington for Christmas lights, what would you think? Oh, I mean iconic street in Auckland.

Oh, Franklin Road. Franklin Road. So, tomorrow night is the very first night for Franklin Road Christmas lights. So, from 7.30 until 10 o'clock it all starts tomorrow. And I know and it doesn't get better than that for Christmas. She avoided the Auckland FC taking on the Wellington Phoenix.

Damn it. To be honest, that just also screams to me, don't go tomorrow because everyone's going to go to the Franklin lights tomorrow. Okay, so no mention of the biggest sporting event happening in the country tomorrow. So the playing field is even. Megan.

I'm not that confident. Alright, Megan, who are you going to give it to? You know I have a soft spot when he brings Nelson Conte and charity.

Yeah. I'm going to go with Conor. I'm going to go with Conor. Hayley should have gone with the Auckland FC.

Yeah, the North lose that. It's a huge event that's happening anyway. She didn't mention it. Cricket on to the Mason as well. How did North lose that? It's a huge event. It's happening. She didn't mention it. Cricket on to the Mason as well. I thought you guys had done such a beautiful job of mentioning it all morning. It's had the air time.

It's had the air time. Okay. Hayley, listen. Hayley Conner, appreciate your time. Go and have a wonderful weekend.