Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Why Ben dropped trousers for Taika Waititi’s approval!

Episode Date: March 31, 2026

On today’s show:  An April Fools’ prank on Megan's mum spirals... The long‑believed lawn water‑bottle dog poo myth is debunked! Tiny name changes that you HATE Megan confronts Ash London LIVE on air about the unwanted nickname... Why Ben said "sweet dreams" to his uber driver? The mystery of whether anyone ever gets the same Uber driver twice is debated. Why Ben dropped trousers for Taika Waititi’s approval... Our Fuel Frenzy makes national news!!! Instagram: @THEHITSBREAKFAST Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono, Ben & MeganSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The John O'Ben and Megan podcast, thanks to Dilma. Goodness really does taste great. Dilma, making the world a better tea. That's podcast, another podcast, enjoy. Thanks for being here with us. Megan, we're going to kick things off with a prank call to your mother and varying levels of feedback on this one, some saying. We pranked over the Nelson Council.

Producer Troy came in, he stepped up. He said three years of improvisation, don't you worry, leave it with me. Yeah, well, I don't know, I've got this. Almost too good. Three years of it. This was the day he prepared. And you did a wonderful job playing the role of a council worker from Nelson Council. But, you know, someone from the council was like, this is hilarious.

Then on the other hand, next text, that was the most cringe-worthy, aggravating thing I've ever listened to on the radio. Humiliating, poor Ray-ray, your mother on the airwaves. She's all right. Like, I don't know. I messaged her afterwards and she was like, I can't believe I got sucked in. Yeah. I mean, it's the prank game. You know, it's for some people and not for others.

That's true. That's true. And then looking on the text machine, too, there's another thing that says W.T.H. Jono. I don't know what it's in relation to. Can we call them? Yeah. I'd like to get to the bottom of it. That was just after the alpha quiz, I think. What were you talking about? Nothing. We're just doing the quiz. Is that? You caught someone big dog? Was that in that?

Or when someone spat you got spat on? Yeah. Well, we'll get to the bottom of this. We'd like to close the loop on these texts. You'll hear Ray, right. raise humiliating prank very shortly. Hello. How are you, mate? Good, thank you. Did you text in WTH, Jono?

Exclamation mark, exclamation mark, exclamation mark. Yeah. We're trying to decide what that was about, because, I mean, it could be multiple things from Jono this morning. Oh, no, I wouldn't even blame Jono. I was just making fun because the music was like getting turned off and stuff. Oh, it's technical issues.

Yeah, that's John. Yeah, that's me. That's me. Were the songs cutting in and out? Yeah, or replaying. Champagne me. Yeah, that would have been me. I'm sorry about that.

Yeah. It's not, I wasn't even like serious. I just like make it a thing to make fun of Johnna. Yeah, it's good. Yeah, we're all for it. It's fun. What's your name, ma'am? Oh, my name's Greg.

Greg, lovely to me. What part of the country are you in, Greg? Oh, I'm in Ashbrideon. Oh, lovely. What do you do there? Oh, I work at Asford. I'm just cutting up wood for them. Oh, good on you.

Well, we'll let you get back to it. And thank you for listening to the show. Oh, well, good. Thank you. See you. There we go. So technical, technical complaints. Enjoy the podcast.

John O'Bin and Megan. The podcast. The Hats. So we've already got to April here. I know. That's crazy. It is April Falls Day too. So don't fall for anything

that looks too good to be true or too weird to be true because it probably is a prank. Like April Falls Day, we heard it in your news that they want to shine along on the elderly people having fools. Maybe that's true, isn't it? I think it is true. I thought that was a prank. Sorry,

I'm not fully free of it. I'm pushing over elderly people today. It's one of my favourite hobbies. Ray Ray, your mum, we love her, and Nelson. It's become a tradition of the show that every April Fool's we try and prank her. We got her a beauty. Hello. Hello.

Are you there, Mum? Are you there? Hello. Can you hear me? What? Mom. Mom. Can't do it.

A bit of a cell phone reception gag there. At this time, we thought we'd step it up slightly. The council, a bit of a hot button for her, right? Yeah, she likes to put out her own cones and, like, close off the road or close off, like, part of her part of the road, or she has a real... beef with the council shares, beef with people driving up their cul-de-sac. Parking in the cul-de-sac.

Trucks parking everywhere. Producer Troy, three years improv, is stepping in here. Is a worker for the Nelson Council? Nelson City Council, yeah. Okay, good luck, here we're going. Hello? Hi, it's Todd here from the Nelson City Council.

How are you going? Good, thank you. Hi, just a courtesy call. We are going to be starting to do some work around resurfacing the road and that kind of stuff and we're just going to be closing your street, Claremont Heights, for about three weeks. So just to courtesy call to let you know that

parking will obviously be available on Saxton Road. Brilliant. We just hope that'll be alright. Oh, we'd be wonderful because I'm sick of all these pussments that are parking on the footpath. Yeah, there'll be no parking available on Clemwell Heights. You only be able to get in, no residence, parking or anything for about four weeks.

So we have to leave our vehicles. Yeah, down on Saxton if possible. Yep, okay. Yep, no. Oh, that'll be interesting. Yeah, for about four weeks. That's a challenge. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, okay. No, that's good. Are you getting in touch with all the residents or you just... Yeah, we're just calling up the street now. We just got to your number and we'll keep going up. One other thing, when we did this a while ago, we did have some reports that you were putting out your own cones.

Is that true? Yeah, I did. I put out a road cone on the letterbox because I got sick of people parking in my driveway because they were the contractors up the hill to say, well, stuff off. Where did you get that cone just out of interest? Oh, my husband does signage.

Oh, okay. We've got all the traffic management stuff. Yeah, just for future reference, that is an infringement of the council bylaws. Even if it's on my property? Yeah, even on your property, yep. So it's really quite funny because the councilman came up, and if I parked on the roundabout like he did, that would have been an infringement, wouldn't it? I don't want to get you angry. Sorry.

I am. Yeah, I can hear that. Yeah, but that's cool. Yeah, no, that's fine. That'll be good. We'll look forward to the row being sealed because it is a mess. And we do actually have to, because we have had this official report, we will be still issuing that fine for the last time you use the cones. Brilliant.

It'll be about $500? I don't. And just send this to your address right now? Yep. What? We just send that to your address, that fine? Oh, well, look, you could be gun covering a can of worms by doing that. Why is that?

Because I've got pictures of all these vehicles that are parked on footpath, and that's illegal, isn't it? Okay, yeah. Oh, Mom! You can put it in my account if you're off for $500. Ray Way, it's us. Yeah, no, it's, it's, um, who was that that I was talking to? Oh, Troy. To myself. Producer Troy.

April Fool. Oh, my f***. Ray, Ray, you legend. Oh, so good. So, I'm sweating. We'll leave you to deal with the back end on that one. Yeah. John O'Ne and Megan.

The podcast. The hits. Ben, you really suspicious nowadays. He's a big player in the prank game. You have been for decades. You're on high alert on a day like this. You've perused through the paper. Any big corporates getting involved?

There's lots of pranks. You know, you can see it a mile away. Tover O'Brien makes TVNZ breakfast debut. Prank. Mitch Barnett, Warriors co-captain out for injury. Prank. Prank. Yeah.

Christopher Lachian's cabinet reshuffle, prank. You know, like, petrol crisis, prank. Yeah. So, so many pranks, guys. No, obviously. I haven't seen any at the moment. No, no, I haven't. Maybe people have forgotten it is April Fool's Day with everything else going on.

We spoke yesterday after 9 o'clock on the show that there was a huge fad, the 80s and 90s that everyone, was it a Nelson? Yeah, absolutely. Oh, yeah, it was nationwide, eh? Yeah, you filled your empty 1.5 litre bottles up with water, put them on your lawn. Is it like a sprite bottle or something? There were usually a green one, but it didn't have to be. Yeah, and... Oh, we do green.

Our is clear. A lot of us are green around the water up, yeah. Oh, you guys had a whole other... But the theory was it would keep defecating dogs off your lawn. And then you discovered, after the show yesterday, it was a prank. Prank. It was a prank. Yeah, I think it might have gone worldwide and we might not have been the first country.

But Ian Scarrow, who hosted a gardening show here in New Zealand on TV, on radio, he said it on his gardening show. And everyone believed it. And it became like a huge prank. Well, Scaro would have been happy with that work. We knew that, you know, eventually it didn't work. But I always thought it was said with the intent that it did. Like, I didn't realize he was chucking it out there as a job. I thought there was some science behind it.

But the whole time he would have gone, this has got out of hand. And it was in an era too where you didn't have, you know, skeptical people on the internet calling it out. He couldn't quickly immediately fact check it. We just ran with it. The Aussies, they did an expose on the whole thing recently. It's absolute nonsense. In fact, they did a test in New Zealand.

They took a whole lot of lawns. They put a bottle on some, no bottle on the others. And yes, you probably guessed it. The dogs were 3.6 times more likely to defecate on the lawn with the bottle than on the lawn without the bottle. Am I saying defecate wrong? No. Am I saying it wrong?

I see it defecate. He sees it. He sees it odd. Yeah. I like it though. But yeah, so that's the... Jeez, that's a great prank. The dogs are like there's already stuff on their lawn.

They don't care if I drop this too. I don't know how it was meant to work, but anyway. Reflections? Like, distract them or like, I don't know. We all believed it. No, it was a simpler time where you just took everything at face value. We didn't question anything, did we? Is a prank, a prank, though, if you don't get the payoff?

Because he's no longer with us. Now he's getting the payoff. We're giving the payoff. How many years in the making? Three decades, four decades. Right, you didn't get the whole. I think he did admit to it, but maybe that wasn't as big a news as everyone doing it

you know so yeah what we wanted to check is has anyone else fallen victim to some savage pranks over the years

4487 on the text please did it go wrong yeah surely this is in your guys oh yeah we're plenty but we're not

yeah we did a really probably the more awkward one like the digger through the house and things like that Ben's house was an accident

but the more awkward one was yeah Ben's like ha ha ha ha Was Guy Williams, and it didn't even make it to air. That was, yeah, we pranked Guy and we kind of rigged, I think we've spoken about this before, hidden cameras in our boss's office. He called Guy in and it was meant to be, what was the premise?

I can't even remember, but the gag was meant to be revealed in about a minute or two. Yeah. That Guy was losing his job and he's like, no, just joking. And so our boss led Guy into a conversation. So what do you think about the show? And Guy just being Guy, Guy, very honest, he unleashed on everything. And we're listening next door with headphones on. And our boss knew at the time that we're recording and listening.

I was like, why are we, like, don't talk to them about this. And we slowly remove the headphones about five minutes into this rant. And we're like, I don't know where you should have been. And then he walked down the room and we didn't know, should we tell him it was a problem? Yeah, we did at the end, but it was a little awkward. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. Now we need to go. More important issues, what version of your name you don't like?

Yeah, you guys are really blowing this up. I just mentioned it to you. And I don't want to sound pretentious. but there is. You got her. People call, I have lots of nicknames, and I'm fine with all of them. You can call me whatever you like,

but there's one that I just don't really love. Toxics one we hear around the word faces. That's an interesting nickname. Do we say that one to her face? Oh, no, I was meeting like Magoos. Oh, yeah, that's right. Megibus. Like, I get all kinds of variations.

But I don't love Meg. When you just call me Meg, it's not megs yes all the time not me you really should not have passed this information on to us you should have kept that classified because we are going to where's they say weaponise this look I think I think it stems from family guy because they're always saying shut up meg so it might be that

also there's someone else on another radio show Meg so she's you know she's got that can't have two Meg's doing the same job be confusing for people well who names Megan so I might have like ruined that for her. Oh, really? I just don't like Meg.

Sounds like pig. Honestly, heaps of people have that. Little tiny variations of their name that really irritate them. You did that to Ashley in the office. Her name's Ashley and she hates Ash. And you were calling her Ash for...

I was so the same. I didn't realize that she didn't like Ash. No. Yeah. I love handing out nicknames to people. But it's a gamble too when you got. I just called someone Big Dog on the radio before. It's kind of endearing when you do it.

No, but not if you don't like it. the thing. Yeah, it's meant to be endearing. Yeah, I get it. But yeah. I said to Ashley, I was like, Ash, and I was like, actually, do you like that? And she was like, no, I don't. Because I don't like Meg. So I was aware. But you do the New Zealand thing and you just fester on it. You just fester. You don't say anything. Yeah. So, yeah, we want to know the variation. The tiny variation of your name that you just really can't stand. My wife, Jenny. Adding a Y to Jen just really. Just one letter. Changes the whole environment.

Yeah, my husband's Andrew and he hates Andy. But you call him Andy, don't you? I call him Andy P. Just to wind him up. Yeah, I think I'm just picking it the wound now. Do you like Benny? I don't mind. I get variations.

If I get Ben Lott's, but Benjamin, when I used to get when I was in trouble was a kid. It was always that. But yeah, Benny, Benji, whatever. I like saying people's full names, Benjamin and Jonathan. Yeah, I don't mind. You're not going to get wound up? You're not going to get wound up. I'm not getting wound up.

I'm just surprised that people know that I'd be. Like, there's any version of it. That surprises me. You're not going to go feral over it, Ben? You even answer to Jono. I'm a reasonable person. Yeah. You'd keep your emotions in check.

Yeah, definitely. Okay, I'll see what's happening. There's nice. Thanks to worry about the world. But, you know, right now being called Meg is not one of them. Hello, Jason Stapham, that movie you made here in New Zealand. Can you change the name from Meg? Can we call the shark Megan?

It's triggering Megan. I confide in you off here that a friend of mine keeps calling me Meg. We didn't know we were going to break. All right, Meg, we'll call us soon. Don't know. Yeah, you can correct it. Yes. Yes.

No, on the radio. Yeah, we'll do that shortly. Two for one, baby. Content, and you get the correction. John O'Benn and Megan. The podcast. That. Yeah, with us this morning.

She does not like, doesn't like the A and the end drop it off the, the whole name, Megan. It does feel a bit weird calling you Megan and calling Ed Shear and Edward. I just wanted to try it out. You know, variations of your name. That's, it kind of throw you off of that. Yeah, but he's, like, we know him as Ed, you know? He's just always pitched himself his head. I've never pitched myself as Meg.

Anyway, your friend who is another radio host, Ash, London, she's on the edge. She's been, this is a new friendship blossoming, and she's launched in, she's been calling me Meg. It's whining you up. She's been calling me Meg. Why to you are you going to? No, don't say it's wine. I just said it's a little, I'm just, I don't know what to do because it's the start and I could say, hey, but I also don't want to be that person. So I'm like, maybe I'm going to have to rock Meg.

You were so angry. You threw your drink bottle at producer Troy's groin. Yes, you did. You said, show me your groin. That's how angry she was. So what is the variation of your name? Loads of text. Yeah, exactly.

I'm not the only person. Someone said, Hayden said, oh, maybe I shouldn't have said that. But my wife absolutely hates me when me and my twin call her Trish, when her name's Tish. If looks could kill, we would definitely be dead. She hates it so much. She reckons next time she hears me say it will be the day we get divorced. That's fair enough. That's not even her name.

We've got versions like Amanda getting annoyed, getting called Mandy. I get that's a variation but not even her name. Patricia hates Patty or Pat. She said short on the other end. Trisha or Trish, yes. But not Pat. The text comes through,

I'm Michelle, not Shelly. Finger nails down the blackboard to me. Fair enough. We're getting it out into the market too. The rebrand's happening live on the radio. So, Haley, morning to you. Good morning, guys. It made me feel yuck when you said Edward Sharon.

I know. It does sound a bit weird, eh? I just tried it. I didn't like it either. Uh, Haley, hey, first of all, thanks for getting on the radio because we're going to give you a hundred dollars free fuel. We're doing it all week and it's... And it's not April fulls? April fuels.

No, April fuels. It's even better. It's legit, Haley. Amazing. My name's, I'm a double E, like I spell my name Haley. Yeah. And in written form, it purses me off something chronic when people go EY. And my email address has my name spelling correctly in it, and they still get it wrong.

No, I always try and look at how people spell that name. Because I get a H, because of Megan Markle, I get an H in my name. So I always make sure you've got to look at how people, it's common courtesy. And now makes sense because she is Megan Markle's number one fan. Yeah. Why she likes Megan. Right now it's adding up. Yeah.

Hey, Lee, with a Y, lovely talking with you. No, not with the Y. Oh, Hay Lee, not with the Y. Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. This is exactly the type of stuff I have to deal with. Yeah, I'm so sorry. In real time, I'm sorry, Hayley. We're going to hook out with her.

Just spell your name right next time. Emily, she's on hold. Don't know what she's saying right now. She will be retorting to that. But Emily, good morning to you. Good morning, guys. M's. Emma.

Emma, Emeradi. What is it? I hate Emma. You don't like Emma? My name is Em, earthly. There's an I in it. There's no A. Everyone comes in with the same.

Well, Emma's kind of a completely different name, right? It is. It is. So it's like, why do you call me Emma? Like, my name's Emma Lee. Everyone delivers this with the same tone as well, a tone of decades of frustration. Yeah. So Emily, last time someone called you, Emma, what happened?

I just sort of cringed and looked at them, and I'm not a confrontational person, so I just let them get away with it. And then I'm like, oh, these people. You're swimming with the fishers now. $100 coming your way, appreciate it. Great text still coming through. From a Haley, to be fair, Haley, spelled with EY is the only appropriate spelling

with a bit of Haley beef on the text coming through. I agree Haley with that EY. Someone says, my name is Kimberly not Kim coming through and Fiona's text says, my name is Fiona and I hate me called Fiona. This is a great tech.

I think she just hates other people. Well next, Megan is going to rewrite the wrongs of this Meg scandal. Yeah. Come on, Meg. You can do it. We'll get to call your mates. John O'Ben and Megan.

The podcast. Megan, hates being called Meg and her friend Ash London, who's a radio host on the edge. Yeah, she's been calling me Meg and I just told you guys this, you know, behind the scenes being like, I don't particularly like Meg. But you said that I now need to address it. Yeah, and you can do so in an awkward radio phone call. Okay, we'll leave us to you. Good luck. Good luck, good luck. How you're feeling? Terrible.

Suck in the big ones. Hi. Oh, my love. Good morning. Good morning. How are you? I'm good. How are you?

I'm not good. I've been off from work sick and I got buddy sick. Oh, you're sick. I'm so sorry. I think we're looking up today. Buddy's still home, but I'm going to attempt to get into work because I'm back now. Well, I'm excited about our dinner. Me too.

How are you going? What's news? How's everything? It's great. Everything's great. I do I just wanted to like bring up one thing with you

of course it's like so it's so minor it's so minor but um I like just I really just think I need to point it out

before we next like see each other please I think you honestly always go for it I don't love the name Meg. Oh my gosh. I figured that out after our

I was like, I'm calling her the same as Meg and I have been told in the past that that's not her name and I was going to text you about it. I was literally going to text you about it and I was like, don't be a psycho. You can bring it up with it. I totally know. Someone told me that.

I'm so sorry. Okay. That's great. I was like, I can't let it go on. Okay, done. Are you guys going to step in here? I know, I don't know, Ash, it says John I'm being here as well. Sorry, she's roperable.

She's playing it cool. She's roperable. She's been talking about for seven days. Every morning, she's like, the bitch called me Meg. We were just, no, we were just talking about names that people call you. And I was like, oh, yeah, Ash calls me Meg. I was like, it's not a problem. but they want me to like tell you live on the radio.

This is the thing. This is the thing about women, right? For a week, we've both been thinking, I should really tell her that's my name. And I've been thinking, I should really reach out to and be like, sorry I keep calling you Meg when I've been told specifically in the past.

That's not her name. Just for the record as you can call me whatever you like. Yeah, it's a woman. I mean, you guys are cleared the air. We've got a bit of radio out of it. Oh, great. Fantastic. At least I kept up the ruse

I'm sick and I didn't tell her like I didn't want to go to work. Yeah, yeah. Well played. And then he goes on the radio, right? That was like a busy intersection. I didn't know when to go or I was like, oh, you know, where to come in. So, yeah. This is good stuff.

Okay, thank you, Ashley. Sufficient. Love you. Love you. All right, we're here for you, mate. Yeah, got sorted, mate. I'm not so sick of time this morning. I'm sweating.

Very sweaty show. She was like, I've heard from other people that you don't like. I'm like, oh, God, what are people saying about me? That's what everyone says, don't look here. the eyes and don't call him Meg. I learnt that the first day. John O'Benn and Megan, the podcast, The Hits. I know you do this from time to time.

I think we all do when you say something and you're like, oh, that didn't sit right. You're just in autopilot. You do it the other day. Who did you say, I love you too? The painter or something. Oh, yeah, the painter had wrapped up for the day. So I'm going home now.

I said, love you. You never know. That might have made his day. Yeah. Potentially or confused it, one of the two. Well, there's those conversations I had one the other night and it just left me confused. as I exited an Uber,

and I think it would have left the Uber driver a bit confused as well because my wife and I went to the football and saw the All-Wates play the other night and we took an Uber down there as well, and we're chatting a little bit, a little bit to the Uber driver about what we're doing and what we're going,

going the football. And I think as we left, I was trying to piece it together. You know when you say something and I'm like, how did I get there? And as we were leaving, he said, good night, but I think meaning have a good night.

All I heard was good night. And I went, sweet dreams as I shut the door. And then I shut the door Just thinking it was like Say goodnight to one of the kids And I was like And my wife looked at me And I was like

Did you just say sweet dreams To the Edinburgh? That's a lovely thing to say back to And then he drove off And I didn't have a chance to go Oh yeah I did I was like sweet dreams

I was like yeah So I don't know if he had sweet dreams I don't know how he felt about the sweet dreams Sometimes instead of saying goodbye I say no night And it's like oh Yeah well there's no point Going back over it

Did you give him a good rating The old five stars? Yeah Yeah, I did actually, yeah, but I was like, yeah, sweet dreams. Here's something I was thinking about Uber drivers and taxi drivers. Have you ever had the same Uber driver twice? No. Oh, never.

In the history of taking Uber's, if I had a double up. Never, have you? No, I don't think I have. Not unless they give you their card and then you call them back, but not randomly. I think there's a conspiracy theory here. What, there's just a lot of Uber drivers. Potentially, that's a theory. No, there's a conspiracy.

So, four, four, eight, seven on the text. All right, have you had the same over driver twice? Or taxi driver? Yeah. Yeah, wild. I was just sitting in the middle of the night thinking that. I was like, I've never had the same. Same Uber driver twice.

Could they not, like, set favorites? So, like, they pick me up and I'm like, real friendly, and I give a tip and stuff, they can be like, star, favorite her. Maybe that's why we've never had the same Uber driver twice. Did you? Was it you that got upset after a few drinks that you were never going to see that Uber driver again? Oh, yeah, no. I did.

I was like, oh, my God, have a nice life. Yeah. Sweet dreams. Yeah, I'd had a few wines But I was like, oh my God, I'll never see you again. What was his name? What was his name? What was his name?

I mean, and chances are you probably won't see them. Yeah. You'll never take you anywhere again. He meant so much to me in that moment. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The Hats. Has anyone ever had the same Uber driver or taxi driver twice? It does really feel like a very special moment in your commuting career.

If you do stumble across the same driver, None of us, none of the three of us have ever experienced. And I'd say combined between the three of us, you take your taxis and your Uber's, hundreds of rides over the years. But maybe we're too sporadic with our riding. Yeah, that might be in a, yeah, that could be the case. 0,800, the hits telephone number. Kimberly, I can't believe we're talking to, I can't believe we're talking to someone. Hi.

Hi, Kimberly, happy New Year to you. Happy New Year. You've come across the same Uber driver more than once. Yes, so he was our neighbour. Oh my God, that's so handy. What? Yeah, so we had ordered an Uber to pick us up, and about a second later, obviously, after he'd accepted the drive,

it said your Uber is waiting outside, you know, it sends the message. And we were like, what? And maybe we thought he'd just picked someone us or something like that. And then we ordered an Uber home, and he picked us up again and we were like oh you know oh you're out here and he's like oh yes I'm headed home after this

and then we found out he was our neighbour and he dropped jrothed he's like well I'm head home now did you end up just saving his text number you could just text him and be like hey we did we did he gave us his number but we were like oh my god

what are the chances that is yeah that is levels of luck Kimberly uh geez once in a lifetimer amazing well actually more for you because he's your neighbour so you probably

run into a bit more. But anyway, Kimberly, $100 free fuel. You're a bright and bubbly personality, Kimberly. What do you do? I am a travel agent. Oh, yes. Makes sense. Yeah, it makes sense.

Talk to people all day. Yes. Hey, well, Kim, you take that petrol money and have a wonderful day for April Fulner's day. Thank you so much. Thanks for sharing the story. It was awesome. Producer Troy, you've had it at the same, what, Uber driver?

Yeah, for, I'm going to say a month. Really? Almost every morning. It was my first friend I made in Auckland. Oh. I moved here and I didn't have a car and so I had to Uber to work every morning. And Shivia, Shivia picked me up every single morning for about a month. Oh, that's lovely.

And so did you get to know Shivia over a little bit? Two kids, a wife. She looked after the family business while he did a bit of Ubering. Geez, you would have covered all of the light topics. All over a month. So it wasn't planned the next day. Like it was just due to timing. You wouldn't go, oh, see you same time tomorrow

because I guess it's still luck of getting that Uber driver again, right? Well, the first week was like, oh, hey, you again. And then after the second week, it happened again is like, okay, we're just going to be doing this every morning now. Did you guys ever catch up out of the Uber? No, I never did. And he never asked me about my life. It was more just a one-sided sort of.

Maybe that's why the relationship was never going to work. Shivia, well, if you're listening, Shivia, maybe we can organise a catch-up. I'd love to see Shivia. A little Uber ride again somewhere, you know. It's been about four years. years since I've seen this, should you? Yeah.

I miss him. And the one side of chair. Hope he's doing well. Hope he's doing well. The text that come through as well. We had same overdrive it twice. He remembers us and he also purchased our table and chairs of trade me years ago. Oh, brilliant.

New Zealand. That sums up in New Zealand to one sentence. John O'Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hits. I just said moments ago that I was spat at it and I might have, producer Troy said you really sold the sizzle. I made it sound like it was a vicious saliva attack on me.

and my personality and integrity. But I went for a meeting with a guy at a cafe. I didn't really know him that well, but he ordered a scone with his coffee. Yeah. And he was eating the scorn, but also talking at the same time, which is always a bit of a gamble.

Okay, and then I see a bit of scone catapult from his mouth onto my naked forearm. I had a t-shirt on, be a naked forearm. So it's sitting in the middle of my forearm. we both sat there I could see in his eyes he's like do I acknowledge that and I'm thinking is he going to acknowledge that

and he had to his credit he did he said I think I just I think I just spat on you and then I did again we've mentioned there's such a New Zealand hour this hour I did the New Zealand thing I was like oh and I'm looking down

and I don't think you did I don't are you looking right at it I'm staring at it and he's looking at it and I'm like Did you have a scorn? No, I wasn't any of a scott. No, then, no. I was like, no, you didn't. And then so for the remainder, another 20 minutes of conversation. Sorry, I bumped microphone.

Sorry. Matt Anderson, our boss. He won't have that. He's out of the car. He hates it when we bump our microphone. It's a huge bug meal with the show. Sorry. Oh, your neighbour feels him.

We can just keep bumping the mic. Anyway, dog legging. So then the 20 minutes, this meeting went on for another 20 minutes. And the whole time, I just could not take the focus off this bit of scone on my phone. not even pull it off. No, because he's looking at me. And I've just told him, no, you haven't sped on me. And then so I'm got the dilemma.

Well, you definitely have. I can see it. But essentially, you're gaslighting him now because he's sitting there looking at it. 100%. He's the one who's spat on me, mate. All I want to do is above the microphones now. I lost the story halfway through. But it's not.

It's going to wind up our boss and wind up you listening. He's texting us now. He's like, please stop doing that. Like a scone crumb to my ears, he said. So, you know, I, and the first thing I just. That was Megan. That wasn't me. Should we just keep doing this for another 10 minutes?

He definitely should have just flicked the crumb off. Don't try and bring it back to the story, guys. Don't try to bring it back. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The Hats. A Hunt for the World of People back in cinemas. We had a couple of the stars of hunt for the world of people in the studio yesterday, which is really cool. Three of them.

Yeah, Oscar Cightly, Rachel House and Reese Zabee. We've only got two microphones, which always makes us nervous when you have three guests. Yeah. Can't have guests outnumbering the minds. microphones and radio. It feels like we need just one more pair of headphones and one more microphone. But anyway, that's... I'm not technical.

I'm not a technical person, but we often get three and you're like, ooh, it makes it tricky. It does make it tricky. The whole time I can see Ben like thinking, I can't hear them. They're on a microphone. Anyway, we never get it away through that. Oh, they're very funny, and it's a very funny movie. It's back for 10 years. The biggest grossing movie of all time in New Zealand, and it's back in the cinemas.

Select cinemas as of now, so you can see it over Easter weekend. I went along and saw it last night again. It's so good. Biggest grossing movie of all time. New Zealand. Oh, New Zealand movie. Brackets in New Zealand. Yeah,

New Zealand. Yeah, in New Zealand. But it's amazing movie. It's very, very funny. An All-Star cast as well, and I went along with my daughter because she really wanted me to go see. I mean, we met Tyker a couple of times, Takawatiti, and talk to him. But, you know, I would say we're not not that well, you know, but she wanted me to go

along because I ended up getting a couple tattoos. Rita Oura, his wife. She signed my thigh. And also, there's another message for her. readora trying to get her on my daughter's podcast got those tattooed and she was like she's got she got a lot of stuff tattooed oh no she's did you get her signature tattooed yeah i got her signature have you got your wife's name on your head no i've got a wife's name i've got some stuff related to my wife's name as such yeah but i got reader or his signature and readora come on our podcast

tattooed and my daughter's like we need to go along and clear the air with tyke's find out for this is awkward or not i'm like okay okay we can ask him that you know see what he thinks um but then it turned out that my daughter's like, well, you need to show them. And I said, oh no, so that required me, if I was wearing shorts, it would have been just a little, because it's on my upper thigh, it would have been easy, but I was wearing pants, obviously. Oh, of course. What's on your upper thigh? Her signature, and also a message that says read or are come on our podcast.

How do we feel about that? Upper and a thigh? Well, no, low of thigh, I guess, but not too. Did you suggest that area? Or did she? No, it's not upper upper, I don't think, it's not groin region, mate. It's like. Did you suggest that area, though?

No, it was just the area that I thought would be covered by shorts, I guess, a lot of the time. He doesn't have much real estate gift. No, I don't. But anyway, she'd sign it, got tattooed, and then I ended up showing Tyker. Her husband, that she signed you up in a thigh. And I had to drop my trousers. There was no other way around it. I mean, my underpants dropped my trousers.

I could feel everyone's eyes to just look over and blow. You're on the red carpet. And what's going on there? And then Tyker was like, oh, he saw a pen and sent her had a pen. He's like, give me the pen. I'm like, oh, no, what's happening here? he was like, I need to do something. I was like, is he going to scribble it out?

Is he what? And he just wrote, I approve and then wrote his name underneath it. Is it still there? Well, yeah, it's still kind of. Yeah, I guess it's kind of there. It was hard to sort of try. Show us. No, actually don't.

You got to get a tattooed. He's like, don't get a tattoo. Then my daughter's like, so she's like, now we need to get that tattoo. I'm like, oh, it's like you get a signature book or something. Like an autograph book would be a lot easier. It's been a big week for stunts. Big prolific. Been dressed as a hen three days ago.

No. Now he's been taking his pants down on the red carpet. He's out on the red carpet, though, yeah, as well. But you saw a photo last night, and I was like, I needed to explain myself as that's doing the rounds. Why, your pants are down on the red carpet. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The hats. Doing free fuel frenzy this week.

Every caller on air gets themselves $100 free fuel and made the news last night. National news, the billboards around town. They had our free fuel billboard up there on the news and some good puns in this bulletin. Free Fuel Now, a billboard promotion by radio station The Hits. That hits home as the price of petrol sores. Really good, mate. Really good. Yeah. Great to get on your news.

It'd be nice to be on the news for other things that weren't part of a crisis. Yeah. The news doesn't want to know anything that's not a crisis. And you can actually see that video too. Text News to 4487. But something positive for us. It could have been scandalous. Well, true.

Yeah. A-Bend. Yeah. You're leading it. You're making it. sound like he has skeletons that are soon to come out. No, he's just been on the ears forfeit. Yeah, I'm trying to fix me.

Yeah, well, don't make it sound like in the now. You're like, Abed. In the past, a long time ago. The court case pending, Abed. Name suppression, lifting, Abed. We're talking about your fuel, as we have been, a lot about it. And a friend of mine, he has to fill up for his wife.

She just doesn't do it. As an adult, she doesn't fill up her car. Has never done it. And he will do it, you know, he will take her car out to fill up. specifically. That's where I couldn't say. Specifically. Specifically, there you go.

Just to fill up in the weekends. My mum's the same. Really? So she'll tell Dad, she'll be like, oh, my car needs to be filled up. Sometimes he'll have to do, like, a special trip. Sometimes it'll be, like, on the way somewhere. But I don't know why. Or, like, she'll go to one where she knows the people will come out and pump it.

Remember people used to do that all the time? Yeah, they used to pump for you. They don't do that nowadays, did they? Attendance or whatever. She'll go to a station. she knows someone will pump it for her. Well, eventually the petrol station is like, just to do it yourself, mate.

Yeah, that's true. It's taking a lot of time and labour. Is it one of those things where you think it's harder than what it is? Potentially. Some adults, you do reach adult age and you realize, hey, I'm not going to be good at this adult thing. Many for me. Many for me.

I was saying the other day, I was in a meeting with some Kiwi Saber dude. I spent 35 minutes smiling and nodding about interest rates and investments, and I walked out and I had no idea what had just taken place. My wife could see it on my face. I reckon he could see it in my eyes too. You definitely don't hide it well. No. Everyone knows.

Another thing I'm not good at as an adult is drinking water. You know, it's the most simple task. We know how much we need to get in there. It's basically just opening your mouth and inserting liquid into it. Remembering about Megan's very good. Although maybe too far the other way. Yeah, probably. She comes with two bucket loads of water.

Yeah. Two 1.2s and a coffee and an energy drink. Many days I'll leave with a full. water bottle that I arrived with. So as an adult, you should be able to just, you know you should drink water, you know you need to drink water. Yeah. Yeah.

But yeah, okay, so what is it for you? What is the thing that you're an adult that you're like, oh, I'm not that good? A lot of the time I feel like if I really wanted to, I could be good at it. Yeah. I feel like if you wanted to be interested in Kiwi Saber, you could. Yeah, you're right. I'm like, I'm not really, like hanging a picture frame up. I don't have any interest in learning able to do this.

How do you get your picture frames up? Who is that? I get somewhere around to do it. And they do it real great job. You know, and they do a great job. great job. Otherwise, I've tried it in the past. There's four different nails and bits of stuff. And I'm like, let's just get someone who knows what they're doing.

I'll make him a cup of tea and do we have a chat. Do you get the hangman? Yeah, I see the vet of the guy driving around. Yeah, good pun name. I like a pun name too. You should get the hangman around. Yeah. The hangman is just like, I was a qualified builder, but now I can make buttloads of

cash just hanging stuff up for people like you. Yeah, great. And he does a great job of it. All straight. The lines are good. Not going to fall down. Not going to need to move it. All good.

Yeah. As an adult, you'll never hang a fridge. No interest. No interest. John O'Ben and Megan, the podcast. The hits. Just talking about as an adult, what adult things are you terrible at? You recall it that gets on air wins $100 free fuel for April Fuel's Day.

It's either you're terrible at it or you're going by my life motto. Don't get good at what you don't want to do. Yeah, I feel like same with your Kiwi Sabre thing. If you really wanted to, but you have no interesting. You're like, I don't want to be good at it. Yeah, you're right. reach a certain age for you're like,

that's just not for me. And if you have to be, you really can knuckle down to do it, but if not, you know. And as soon as you get good at something, everyone will ask you to explain it. You tell us about,

what's happening with these volatile markets? You're right. I'll be on Z-B, they'll be wanting to talk to me. Hosking will be wanting an interview. Don't do that. You're right, but then it puts pressure on someone else.

Well, my wife has to hang picture frames and stuff or get someone in. Now, Megan, you as an adult, I can't believe you don't know how to do this. Tell the time. Analog, like I know digital. I know digital.

I mean like I know 24 hour. Like, hit me with any 24 hour and I'll tell you straight away. 2330. 11.30. Yeah, nice. Yeah, I'm pretty good at that. Hands on a clock. And why take away the numbers on a clock?

It's already hard enough and then suddenly you've just got two hands in a blank canvas. Yeah, sometimes. It's a little bit of a guessing game in that situation. I just go by the sun. You're kind of there. Sundial. You'd be, buddy, top-notch in the military. Telling the time in the military.

Purpose! Time! 0-730! I'll be there. Producer Grace is in with us right now. What's something for you? I hate calling and making doctor's appointment. It is the scariest thing ever to me. Scary?

Yeah, I just find it intimidating. Like, I had to move my dentist office to one closer to me, and that was the scariest thing I've ever done. Oh, canceling the dentist? Yeah, just like, my phone was shaking. I was like, hey, please. I don't like, call it. I don't like, call it.

people either at all. I always try and make my husband do it. Yeah, but your generation, yeah, I guess I can put you in this too. Oh my God, thank you. I was like, group it with me. That's Grace you're talking to, right now. I was looking at Grace, but now it sounds like I've loved her into Grace's, Genzy. You just don't like talking to people in general, in real life.

Like I say, I hate a lot of people, so I just don't like talking. What are you not good at an adult thing? I love to hear from you right now. Alec, what is it for you? Mine's also a doctor's appointments. My mom still comes with me as well. Oh, you're going to the actual appointment? Yeah.

How old are you, buddy? 20. 20. See your generation. Don't like seeing people. So your mum still goes with you to the doctor. That's cute. Yeah, that's mostly because those words are huge, so I just let her handle it.

Aw. I thought you just sit there. What if, you know. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I want to say. Yeah, what if it's a situation where you're like, I prefer mum's not involved with this. Oh, I didn't.

then I'll thug it out, you know, just by myself. Yeah, yeah, right. I'll fuck it out. Okay, good, I like it. Oh, we're going to give you 100 bucks to put you in your guest tank. Oh, thank you guys. Good on you. I appreciate it.

That's very cute. Christian, welcome. Hello, good morning. Good to have you on. Adult things you're no good at doing as an adult. Hopefully my wife is not listening to this one because we're all able to work right now. Because when I'm doing the laundry, I'm not separating the white ones with the dark one, so I'm just going to pull them all together on the wash.

I'm with you. Oh, my gosh. I am with you. Me too. I'm like, come on, get them together. To be honest. If you tell me in that accent that you do in the washing, that's all we need.

You can have the reds in with the whites for all she cares. It's racist to separate them. Just put them all together, you know? Yeah, just put them all together in there and then do the washing, do the thing, you know? Yeah. The United Nations in your washing machine, maim, I'm with you. Yeah, good on your.

You're forgiven, Christian. You're forgiven for all of your sins. That accent. It's got us. 100 bucks coming your way. Appreciate your call this morning. Thank you. Thank you.

John O'Benn and Megan. The podcast. That's... Fulls too, by the way. First of April. We already got to April. Oh, yeah. April.

Oh, God. Yeah, that's jarring. April fuels, as we're calling us. Because we, in the middle of our fuel frenzy. It's fuel frenzy. Well, there's a fuel frenzy going on outside these walls, isn't it? just not an April for Bulls prank.

I wish it was. Yeah, it would be nice if it was, right? It's been going on for a long time. So, yeah, we've been giving away free fuel to every call it that makes it to air this week. And last night, our boss, Harriet Whiting, one of the last surviving human beings to watch free-to-air television consistently.

Big fan of it, isn't she? Yeah, she is. Harriet Moet, sorry, Harriet Moet, I keep calling her premarital name. Knee whiting, yeah. I was going to start you And then I was like It doesn't matter I know

And then I got caught in the whole of detail Now we spent 20, 30 seconds on it So She's still watching You know the 6pm news Which I know you love to do From time to time Megan Yeah I do like watching the news

It's a benchmark for me It was one of Megan's demands When we were travelling around She's like Can we please just watch the 6pm news At 6pm I'm like okay yeah He set a pretty low bar for satisfaction

We can do that fair Yeah You can do it But geez, it's a slog. It is a real, like... Watching the news? Yeah. I find I get by the end of it, I'm like, I hate my life.

And everything in the... Like, it's never... Oh, yeah. Like, it's just so much doom and gloom. Well, they used to have a good... Yeah, they got rid of it. They sacked the good sort of segment. It was too positive.

I know. Anyway, the fuel frenzy's made the news. The hits fuel frenzy, because we've got billboards around the place promoting this. Have a listen. Free Fuel Now. A billboard promotion by radio station, the hits. That has... Hits home as the price of petrol.

$250 of petrol. You got that Hits Home. Bit of a pun there as well. We made the news. Yeah. Thank you. It's great promotion for us. Yeah, the billboard as well with our faces on it saying winning free fuel.

So, yeah, not a prank. Not an April Fool's Day prank. You can win fuel all throughout the show. Is it crazy to do one now? I mean, we're talking about it. Producer Troy, the... Oh, he's not stoked. If you're not stoked, that's fine.

We don't have to. He's giving me a face of like this is going to cause... You're doing a bin. Yeah, you'll do it later. Then you'll go, could we have three callers later? Yeah, I know. It just feels remiss of us to spend three minutes talking about it. 30 seconds concentrating on Harriet's surname.

No, but we're teasing people for later. Yeah. Okay, later then. All right, Megan, you've slaying me. We'll do it later. We'll do it later. He's agreed with both sides. He's been neutral.

Ben Boyce wrapped up in 20 seconds later, this gentleman. Look at the phone lines, guys. the phones are packed and now are like there's oh yeah no I want them to work for it okay I don't know it would have worked for it rather than just to free me at 6 a.m just for the record better me were willing to get away some free fuel now okay Megan Megan White Megan the monster

and producer drawing Have you convince Megan to give you some fuel or that will be happening at some