Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL SHOW: Work place nicknames... Blister: Shows up after the hard work is done.

Episode Date: January 30, 2025

  ON THE SHOW TODAY Do you remember the Big Day Out? The girls show their hidden talents... Most impressive caller we've ever had. I Didn't know my friends name for FOUR years... We can't believe Megan ate this off the ground!!! Ben is frustrated with malls because of this Megan's review of baby girl! The best 2000s ads... Who remembers Decker? Facebook: The Hits Breakfast with Jono, Ben & Megan Instagram: THEHITSBREAKFAST See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Jono, Ben and Megan podcast, thanks to HelloFresh, your home advantage for delicious midweek dinners everyone will love. Welcome to the podcast, the podcast for the last day of January, the first month already over and done with pretty much. And we've had a real fun show today. We got into talking about workplace nicknames.

A lot of texts come through and you'll hear some very, very funny ones very shortly about nicknames people have for people at their work. But there are more texts that we couldn't quite read out on radio, so we thought we'd start the podcast with those. Yeah. This one's come through.

So they may be not safe. You've got little ears. I'm not... NSFW. Yeah. I'm not shaming your ears. I'm not saying people with little ears. I'm saying younger ears.

You're okay, babes. Why are your ears so little? I don't want to be cancelled. Yeah. All right. Content just for those with bigger ears Is it Ben? Ben just air shamed It's for mature audiences

Here's some nicknames that we couldn't say on radio We've got a guy at work We call the Ask Hole The Ask Hole Because he asks a question You answer it and then you see him asking Someone else the exact same question The Askhole. The Askhole, because he asks a question, you answer it, and then you see him asking someone else the exact same question. The Askhole. Oh, what a dick.

Why? Just because he doesn't trust your answer. Askhole. This one's good. Foreskin, because they always disappear when things get hard. That's good. Gspot We can

Never find him It's quite funny Like you do the thing You try and guess the punchline Okay there's far P-H-A-H-U-C-K Far huck Far huck

Yeah because they're far hucking useless Is what someone's got On this one And at work We have a seaweed who floats around and does fuck all These are really good, if you've got any more we'd love to hear from you 4487 on the text, but there's plenty more coming up in the podcast Yesterday as I was leaving we bumped into someone from work And they were watching on and sometimes

like most officers they put on a bit of a spread hey there's some food left over from a meeting help yourself send out a group email boom time is on people are racing down and as I was talking to this person they're like oh there's old seagull again and I said seagull

they're like oh yeah we call we call him seagull because anytime i said seagull they're like oh yeah we call we call him seagull because anytime there's anything free to put in his mouth he's he's nibbling around i was like that's a great nickname i hate to be called seagull does he know that people call him seagull of course not i was like you'd be mortified if people knew your nickname he said upstairs they've also got a dehumidifier who sucks the air out of the room whenever they walk in. I was like, these are savage nicknames. That is savage.

It's a good workplace nickname, though. Do I have a savage nickname? No. I was thinking we need to come up with some savage nicknames for each other now. Well, we call producer Ellie Fun Sponge, but that's to her face. To her face, there's a gag.

She comes in and we'll be talking about something random. She'll be like, okay, work related. It always brings her back to work. We're like, oh, thanks, Fun Sponge. We do that to your face. Isn't it nice we do that to your face? Isn't that nice? Isn't it nice we workplace bully you right to your face?

End of the year, what did I give you for Christmas, Producer Ellie? I gave you some sponges. They were fun, weren't they? She said they've come in very handy. Yeah, I know. You were like, actually, these are really great. So, yeah, there you go. Well, actually, just a poor lady trying to do her job.

I know, exactly. It's a great job. It's a competent level. Yeah, but anyway. Fun sponge. Someone's just texted in saying at our workplace we have a Levi's because they leave at 5.01 every day. Oh, that's good.

That is good. Should we shut this open? Workplace nicknames. Have you got a workplace nickname? Or have you got workplace nicknames for your colleagues, whether they know about them or not? Yeah, you can say anonymous. They can say anonymous.

That'd be good for them. They probably don't want to find out about these things on the radio. Otherwise it'll be an awkward day in the office. Okay, let's do this. Oh, out of the hits, 4487, workplace nicknames. Maybe you own it. Maybe you know it. It's your nickname. You're like, the hits. 4487. Workplace nicknames. Maybe you own it. Maybe you know it. It's your nickname.

You're like, yeah, I'm okay with it. John O'Bannon Megan. The podcast. The hits. Talking workplace nicknames. Often nicknames that people have for other people at their work that they don't know about. Thanks for people. Generally not that flattering.

I ran into someone as I was leaving the office yesterday. There was free food available. And they said, oh, there goes Seagull again. And someone in the office called Seagull because they only come out when there's free food on offer. And upstairs, apparently, we've also got a dehumidifier who sucks the air out of everyone. Imagine if you found out your name is dehumidifier.

Yeah. Like you say, it's workplace bullying at its finest. But they are making us laugh, these nicknames. Yeah. There's other seagulls on the text machine, not because they eat all the food, but because they are mean to everyone. They go around and poop on everyone.

So people call them seagulls. We've got a MasterCard on 4487, takes all the credit for everyone else's work. There's a Teemu because he takes so long to arrive, and a Handbrake because they're always holding us up. I said, great. We'll go to the phones. Kirsty, good morning to you.

Hi. Lovely to have you on this Friday, Kirsty. Workplace nickname, is it one you have? Is it one you give other people? It's one that my staff call me, actually. They call me Barbie, which is really cute, but my admin staff particularly think that I can do anything

and I work in a engineering calibration business so it's unusual for a female to be the manager and be able to do all the technical as well as managerial. Yes! Girl! You're a boss. Oh, that's cute. You break those gender stereotypes.

That's great, but. It's really cute because I walk in and they'll go, morning, Barbie. Take that. It's a nice nickname. Yeah, it's nice.

Barbie can do everything. It's a nice nickname unlike one we've just got on 4487. We have a hemorrhoid who's a constant pain in the ass. Yeah, I'd probably

go with more Barbie than I do. Yeah, Barbie's lovely. Barbie's lovely, yeah. Justin, morning to you. Morning, mate. How are you? Yeah, Barbie's lovely. Barbie's lovely, yeah. Justin, morning to you. Morning, mate. How are you? Yeah, good, mate.

Workplace nicknames around the office. What have you got? So we had a co-worker called Blister showed up when all the hard work was done. That is good. I like that. And that's a trick, too. There's a trick to that employee, isn't there?

That's a skill. I was called Harvey Norman because I had three years interest-free. In other words, I didn't give a stuff what the customer was telling me half the time. And I've got another one while we're on the phone to you. At my first job, the boss got called Sensolite. Sensolite? Yep. Worked when anyone walked past. Sensolite? Yep. Work when anyone

walked past. Oh, these are great. I love that you embraced Harvey Norman as well, Justin. I know, I dressed with that too. It's really good. Marie,

workplace nicknames. Is this your nickname or one of a colleague? We've got two colleagues. One we call Mirror because whenever you ask him anything he's always looking into that. Yeah, I look into it.

That's great. And the other one we call Suitcase because everyone else carries him. Does Suitcase and Mirror know their nicknames? No, but they don't. They're completely oblivious when they're called it. They have no idea. Well, they do now, Marie. I really appreciate it. Love

your work. That's really good. We have a wheelbarrow always having to be pushed. Only work when they're pushed. We have a deck chair in our office, fold under pressure. Oh, someone's called Lantern because they're not very bright. John O'Bannon Megan.

The podcast. The Hats. As we keep mentioning next week, we are doing the best songs of the last 25 years. The Hats. Top 100 of the 2000s. So far. Quarter of a century of music. We're counting down from 8 o'clock next Friday, which will be awesome.

But we are reflecting on the last 25 years, and someone said yesterday, remember the big day out? I'm like, oh yeah, that was in the sweet spot of, it actually started in the 90s. It was a big festival that was in Australia and New Zealand felt like we just piggybacked on the back of it. We've got some amazing artists, and it

was huge in the early 2000s. Yeah, you were just reminiscing about going into, there was a room called the Boiler Room. It was huge in the early 2000s. Yeah, you were just reminiscing about going into, there was a room called the Boiler Room. It was just a giant tent. Aptly named the Boiler Room because everyone in there was sweaty and so the steam would rise. Not blinking.

Yeah, it was hot. Loud music, everyone dancing. Chewing gum without any gum in their mouth. Great atmosphere in there, right? Yeah. The steam would rise and then it would get condensation on the roof and it would rain. So it's essentially raining everyone's sweat back on you.

Which is equal parts nice because you're getting cooled down and refreshed but also disgusting as well. You saw MIA. The sweat pouring down on you in the tent. So many artists, huge artists came to New Zealand throughout the big day out in New Zealand throughout the Big Day Out. New Zealand was just an amazing line-up of all sorts of bands. Rage Against the Machine, Smashing Pumpkins came, Soundgarden I think played at the first one.

There was a time when that was the only way we'd get big artists. They would come to Big Day Out. And Chili Peppers. They'd come for their own shows. Yeah, you're right. And they'd be all, I remember just walking between because it was multiple stages and so many people.

Yeah. And you'd have to walk and you'd go, I want to see them at two o'clock. And by the time you walked all the way over there fighting

your way through all the people, you're like, oh, now we're here and then we've missed that artist, but we're now going to go back.

And you'd lose your friends probably about half a dozen times. Imagine how many times you lost people. Without, well, you know.

No cell phone coverage. Early days, no cell phone coverage. No cell phone coverage, yeah. Still, seeing Prodigy at the Big Day is one of the best things

I've ever seen live. That was incredible. That was a good time in life, wasn't it guys? Oh, R.I.P. Remember that?

No responsibilities. I imagine it's the Rhythm and Vines for probably our generation in a lot of ways. A lot of people were looking back at Rhythm and Vines

and going, oh, that was amazing. They're doing an amazing job right now, but Big Day Out was huge. My Chemical Romance. Yeah. I found some footage here of Daya Henwood on C4

at the Big Day Out. No, I can't play that, actually. That's probably not safe for radio. Good censoring. Yeah, watching the vision as it's on YouTube at the moment and watching what could be said. There's probably not safe for radio. Good censoring. Yeah, watching The Vision as it's on YouTube at the moment and watching what could be said. There's probably a lot of things not safe for radio. Back then I would have played it.

Back then we would have been mad dog stuff. Not now though. Send some. John O'Benn and Megan. The podcast. The hits. Very excited to see how this countdown comes together because when you look at music over the last 24 years,

so many artists, so many great songs it's going to be really really interesting to see what songs make the top 100 We googled AI told us, can't put an exact figure on it but tens of millions tens of millions of songs have been released and we're just going to whittle them down to 100 so someone's got a big job ahead of them

but there's things that sort of stay in your brain that you remember word for word and that's what we want to get talking about now Producer Ellie Hello We've brought you in Yes, hello there

You're great at this Yeah There's weird things that live rent free in your mind Yeah, it's kind of sad actually if I think about it Because there are so many song lyrics that you do learn you get in your head and stuff like that and then sometimes you hear that song again and you're like, I still know most of those lyrics it's crazy hard why is these things

still in my brain when you forget other things in day-to-day life like important things yeah yeah yeah like just where are my keys yeah exactly but yeah i know all the words to the tax wonder dog commercial so what do you know all the words to well i, I know the words to that Karen and her 20 bucks. Remember that? $20 Karen? Yeah. Give us a little taste of that uncensored, please. Okay.

Hello, this is Karen. Rachel thinks she can ignore me and hide from me for her 20 lousy dollars that she owes me from like well over three months ago. She won $600 at the Stokes Valley Bar. And she said to Jade and Dion, don't tell Karen you've seen me. There's an hour 20 bucks. Now I'm going to stop there. Yeah, that's where it gets a bit,

like don't say for radio. Jeez, you are. So good. I love the voice. It's like it's a monologue to like a famous movie or something. You're like, this is the scene, you are. So good. I love the voice. It's like it's a monologue to like a famous movie or something. You're like,

this is the scene, you know? Liam Neeson, like, you know, one of them taken. What do you know all the words to, Megan? I know the Veronica's.

Do you know that song? I'm sure I know. I'm like a trigger every time that starts. The start of it. Oh, you want the start of it. You want the whole song. Yeah.

Okay, let me just get that for you. It's those things you do learn. How many times have we listened to this song? Yeah, like, I don't know. It's just like we're in radio, so we play it all the time. I want to do that thing that they do on the edge where, okay, you start singing and I'll pull it down and you come back in. Okay.

We've got to get to the start first. It's sort of an intro, isn't it? Should we fast forward it? Oh, you want to fast forward it? Oh, where was it? Okay, Megan. This is your moment. Here we are.

This is a long intro. It is, hey. How much longer does it go for? Here we go. It's coming up. Okay. Good luck. I go ooh, ooh.

You go ah, ah. La, la, la, la. La, la, la, la. I can lie lie lie lie lie lie I wanna wanna wanna get get get what I want don't stop gimme gimme gimme what you got got cause I can't wait wait wait any more more more I can see what they're doing on the edge Alright, 4487, 0800 the hits. What are the things, the songs,

the movie quotes, the random voice messages that an angry lady left on an answer phone? Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hits. Counting down,

the top 100 songs is voted by you for the best songs of the last 25 years. Just put it into chat GPT to see what chat GP would think. It really went.

It didn't want to make an answer and I was like, okay, keep pushing it. And then it went, if IT to see what ChatGPT would think it really went it didn't want to make an answer and I was like okay keep pushing it and then it went if I had to make pick one song based on cultural impact longevity

and overall banger status Blinding Lights by The Weeknd oh really it's the one that ChatGPT told me you got something different on your chat

it is a banger we were doing that dance in lockdown the best song in the last 25 years Wow Biggest Billboard top 100 song of all time When I put it in It came up with Shape of You from Ed Sheeran

That's in my top 5 according to ChatGPG as well Still one of the most streamed songs But we want to know right now Not very consistent I'm in love with the shape of you I want to know lyrics that are in your head, you know, word for word. And so many great calls and texts and so many people on the show really surprising me and scaring me with what they know. Well, that's what you get when you work with people who are on the spectrum, Ben Boyce.

That's superpower. It is a great superpower. Now, Producer Grace, we brought you in. This is something you learned when you were 10 years old, so we're talking 2012? Yeah, I think so. 2012, we're in the middle of the last 25 years. What did you learn word for word?

I learnt Linkin Park, Bleed It Out, the intro. Oh, that's a great song. That's a great one. Now we need to test you. I'm ready. Okay, you ready? Did I practice? Yes. She practiced for years years This is your moment

Ready? It's your Eminem moment right now Here we go for the hundredth time Hang grenade pins in every line Throw them up and let something shot Going out of my mind Filthy mouth, no excuse Find a new place to hang this noose

String me out from my poppy's roots Ride it tight so I won't get loose Truth is you can't stop and stare Blame myself out, no one cares Doggy drenched out, lay down there with a shovel About to reach somewhere, yeah Someone pour it in, make a dirt dance floor again Say your prayers and stomp it out

We bring that chorus, I'll bleed it out Dig it deep, I'll just Wow Imagine me at 10 years old Performing that to my brothers You've got a good performance Thank you Wow. That is good. Imagine me at 10 years old performing that to my brothers. Wow. You've got a good performance vibe. Thank you.

Stop it. Thank you. Well done. Anonymous. We're going to go anonymous. Welcome. How are you? I'm fantastic.

That's lovely. You've got to come after that. You've got to come after that on the radio. That was a big one. That was a headlining performance. What I'm going to do is very impressive compared to that. Oh. Okay. Love it. What I'm going to do is very impressive compared to that. Oh, okay, okay. Love it.

Well, you know, word for word from the last 25 years. What is it? Well, mine would have been 24 years ago. I sat next to like an amusement park side show thing. And it was the Pokemon theme song that played on repeat. And I can tell you right now, I've never watched Pokemon in my life. But I know the theme song. You know every word to the theme song?

Oh, it's it. All right. Can you give us a little bit of it? I've got a little bit here I can play and then you can pick it up, okay? Okay. Here we go. Okay.

I want to be the very best. Like no one ever was. To catch them is my real test. To train them is my cause. Oh, good voice. I will travel across the land, searching far and wide. It's Pokemon to understand the power that's inside. Pokemon, you're the best in a few of me.

I know it's just destiny Oh, come on Oh, you're my best friend In a world we love so Oh, come on Oh, it's me and you Our courage will pull us through You teach me and I'll teach you

Oh, come on Gotta catch them all Gotta catch them all Oh You are through to boot camp. Well done. That is impressive. Jono, Ben and Megan.

The podcast. The hits. 007, zero work ethic, zero skill, seven smoko breaks a day. I like shoelaces, which has come through as well so far up the bosses behind that's all you can see 4, 4, 8, 7 on the text

these are really good demoralising if you find out they're about you you know we do call you Biden because you're a bit dottery you do but that's to your face

we'll get some brainstorming going for us too. I could be Biden, I may be for Biden. Well, maybe there's nicknames going on about, you know, that's the thing. Like you say, Megan, maybe there's nicknames happening and you don't know about it. That's the scary thing, right? Is there? No, no, I'm not saying there aren't.

I was just planting that seed of doubt. Now, Paul Kev's been scammed. Now, there's so many scams going around these days. I talked about the podcast one the other day where I got a message saying, vote for me in the podcast. Yeah, I got that one too. Yeah, and I was like, ah. The reason you didn't vote, though, is you thought that the person it was coming from

wasn't worthy of doing their own podcast. I was going to go, mate, it's a crowded market. I don't know if you're quite up for it. But, you know, that's the thing. There was that poor lady in France who gave all that money to what she thought was Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt. I know. And through AI and all that money to what she thought was Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt. I know. And through AI and all that, she was getting photos.

The photos were not good, though. Like, she needed someone in her life to be like, Brad Pitt doesn't want to be in a relationship with you. Brad Pitt, he spoke about it. He felt really terrible, didn't he? Did he? Yeah, not terrible enough to pay the plane back. He's like, you're an idiot, but I feel kind of bad for you.

But, yeah, so there are so many scams around and you are you're dubious of stuff you know and so over the holiday period um my dad you know he was up staying and he borrowed our car and he went down the road and then we got in the mail which john i would be very familiar with like a letter with photos saying hey your number plate you parked here for too long in this car park uh you know you need to pay a fine yeah and so i looked at it i was gonna pay and i was like actually i wasn't what was i on that day and i was like no actually this was dad dad but dad hit the car on that day so i was like a little awkward hey dad sorry i think this might be you on the day you know you were down there at these shops and he was like sounds like a scam first thing straight off the bat I'm like well I don't think

it's a scam because I got the license plate and stuff like that they've got a photo they've got a photo the date he's like

send me some pictures of it I'll look into it sounds like a scam I'm like okay and then so then I followed him up

again I'm like have you looked into it yeah been asking around a few people this definitely seems like a scam

I'm like look back at the letter it's like it's not with the council so he'd write the council and all that they're like I don't know anything about this it's like a separate business has the car park oh private park they got photos they're gonna know he's like can't find a number i looked at the internet well there's anyway the evidence is stacking up here

then we got a letter a few weeks later saying you haven't paid the thing you gotta pay some more like hey dad this is getting to a stage he's like i think i think it's a scam i think we're being scammed i'm like i don't know if we are but then we did find out and i'm like hey maybe you could read that and he sorted it all out but it's amazing how dubious that people are oh so it wasn't a scam it's not a scam kevin's trying to scam you he was trying to not pay the fine oh i thought it was a really elaborate scam. It's not a scam. No, it's like a legitimate,

and that's the hard thing for legitimate businesses that just want to get their money. Is that a defence in court now? I thought it was a scam. I thought it was a scam. You can do that with your parking tickets, can't you? It sounds like a scam from the council. Yesterday I get this phone call,

and it's someone going, hey, Dad, it's me. You've forgotten to pick me up. I'm like, okay, good one, buddy. How much do you want? He's like, just enough money for the bus. Okay, here's my credit card details. Then hang up.

Yeah. AI technology. That's probably AI technology. That's a scam. So, yeah. Speaking of podcasting, a saturated market, the scams. Tell you what, that's a crowded space at the moment. Jono, Ben and Megan.

The podcast. The hits. For the last few days Tell you what, that's a crowded space at the moment. Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The Hats. For the last few days, you may have heard, Megan's been trying to find out the name of the overnight security guard here at work. We've now said that you can't ask directly. You've got to get his name from him in a more unusual way. We've tried all sorts of things. Which is frustrating

a lot of the audience. There's such an obvious solution to this. It's frustrating me because everyone's like, I know his name. It's been a lot of fun for us. But we wanted to bring on Lisa right now because she had the same thing for multiple years. A great story. She joins us. Lisa, good morning.

Morning. Megan been going through her own little name dilemma. But I think yours really does pale in comparison. Well, you're only a year. A year without knowing the security guy's name. And I'm getting like a lot of crap for it. Everyone's like, why don't you just ask? How did you not know?

But you've made me feel better. Just so everyone knows, we're not allowing Megan to just ask. She's not allowed to ask other colleagues because that's too straightforward, Ben. So what happened to you, Lisa? You tell us your story. So pretty much my kids, I've got six kids so I was in rotation at the daycare and this other lady she had four kids so we'd known each other for years you know school drop-off, kindy drop-off and every day after dropping the kids off to kindy we'd say hi and we I remember introducing myself

when we first met a couple times but as time went on i just forgot her name i couldn't remember it for the life of me so i'd go there and i was like hey sis good morning or hey friend like we were just we were both doing it yeah right so generic sort of uh look the equivalent is like mate g'day mate how are you that's why i used to always say babes because that good cover to everyone hey babes and like we would go for coffee after dropping the kids to daycare we would go out for lunch we would be at each other's houses for birthday parties it came out like when our kids were graduating like after five years of

sort of you know biffing and one of the teachers or parents I can't remember who came up to both of us because we were talking they were like hey Mina hey Leisha and we kind of looked at each other and I was like oh hey you know acted like it was nothing and then after that I said oh Mina so what are you doing after this? And she kind of said, oh, Alicia, I'm doing this. And we were just like, okay, this is weird. And I thought, you know, I still got away with everything until her little one comes up and goes, oh, mum, you know her name now. And then she was so embarrassed and she confessed.

And I was like, bro, honestly, it's all good. I didn't even know your name. And we've been best friends for five years. Best friends for five years. What about social media? Was there no Instagram or anything? Was this a while ago? It was, but we weren't really using it.

What did you have saved as in your phone? This from daycare. This from daycare. Oh, my God. Brilliant. The whole thing. Actually, Megan, this might be for you. Hey, what's your number?

Yeah, put it in my phone. You know, thinking that should save it. And I was like, oh, what do I save it under? And I remember at the time, you know, I struck gold. I'm going to win this one. And she was just like, oh, you know, you can do it. And I was like, oh, yeah, yeah. I can do it.

Yeah, I sure can. Maybe what we should do is get you to take your phone into reception and go, hey, put your phone number in my phone.

Oh yeah, let's do that. But that's creepy. Oh hey, we're going to find out. Hey, I might have an emergency. Could you just put your number

in here? Just say your name and you know, just write your name and then say from security so I know. Anyway, if we're like,

is she hitting on me? I know, yeah. Jono, Ben and Megan, the podcast, the hits. Same Sophie Pascoe announced her retirement from competitive swimming. New Zealand's most successful Paralympian. 11 gold, 7 silver, 1 bronze.

Just 32 years old but of course mum now as well. So yeah, achieved so many amazing things so congratulations to her. Yeah, well done. When did she become a Dame? The last couple of years I guess A couple of years ago Yeah well deserved Yeah

Too well deserved Now something happened last night Which I mentioned before It was kind of a blind side on the old taste buds Where I thought I was putting a grape into my mouth Oh yeah And it was an olive Okay

Ooh And it's a big like one spectrum It's a big difference Yeah to my mouth oh yeah and it was an olive okay ooh and it's a big like the one spectrum big difference yeah polar opposites very salty out of the blue

when you're expecting a nice sweet juicy grape like I enjoy an olive but you're right it's quite very aggressive salty you need to be ready for it salty this flavor

but it reminded me that was probably on the lighter end of things you put in there I once brushed my teeth with Voltar and EmuGel. They've got the tube of EmuGel, which looks very similar to the brand of toothpaste that we have in the household.

White and orange? Yeah, we're getting up early in the morning. You're on autopilot. Yeah, that's not pleasant. That's an awakening. I think everyone, too, when you're early in your sushi eating days, always gets, oh, avocado and it's wasabi, or, oh, salmon and it's ginger.

That's, again, those, yeah. Oh, yes, that gets you on all the time, doesn't it? Yeah, early, like, you do that, you make that mistake once, and then you're like, okay, but it's like for the... It's like your mouth's getting catfished. Yeah. You're like, oh, a little bit of salmon here. Ginger is quite a, yeah, but...

What do you think is the worst thing you've had in your mouth? I mean, you did, you. I would have done many terrible sketches over that, you know. Once someone dared me to eat chewing gum off the ground. And I did. I know. Was that just, was that for like content? Was that for radio?

It wasn't even for radio. It wasn't even for radio. You know, the worst part was it had like gravelly bits in it. I think less of you now. I know. I think less of myself. I'm a stunt. This is a stunt.

It's not great doing it for the content, but at least I go, hey, if I'm going to do it, then at least you make something out of it for TV or radio. Who was it? It was just a friend. It was my best friend. And I don't know why I was outside the skating rink

and I've moved on in life where people dare me to do stuff and I'm like, that's bloody stupid. I'm not going to do that. Peer pressure, eh? Peer pressure.

What was your friend like? Oh, she did it. Yeah. Yeah, she's like, what did you do that for? And I was like, because you dared me to. And anything,

like your reward or anything afterwards? I'm going to, just for nothing. The worst moment ever. Just like, chewing you did. And anything, like your reward or anything afterwards? No. Just for nothing. The worst moment ever. Just like chewing gum off the ground. And it was still kind of minty, which I don't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. I guess it still had flavour in it. The lowest one was

we were working in another radio station. We were broadcasting from the street. And they're like, I dare you to lick the pedestrian button. And this was in the red light district. I don't know what's worse. And they're like, I dare you to lick the pedestrian button. And this was in the red light district. I don't know what's worse. Yeah. And you did it, didn't you?

I did it. Again. Again. And for radio. At least it was for a purpose. Yeah, but still, I don't think anyone's filming it. You're like, oh, okay. Ben, look at our immune systems.

Look at us, mate. We are strong. I literally started squirting hand sanitizer into my tongue afterwards. Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hits. Something that's happening in the malls in China, just having a look at. They've got husband storage pods around the mall.

And, you know, like sometimes you go into an office and there's like a little pod, like a little pod, little glass meeting space. So you can hire out these little things. I mean, I guess husbands, whoever can hire them out, but they've said a lot of husbands are using them. Inside there, there's like a flash chair, there's screens, there's like a game, portable gaming, televisions, whatever. You can hang out there, hire, while your partner goes shopping.

That's genius. I was always sitting in glassings because i spent a lot of time of my life with you know daughters and my wife and inshore was like glassons and there's you know there's nothing for me there and you feel weird on your phone i feel like they should have a little area some couches some things you know maybe some you know put on some sport on it maybe some beers so glassons if you're listening if you get some beers in the shop that'd be nice i'll be like hey let's hit it i'll be in hitting Glassons Friday night with the boys. Sit around and, you know, got a little area.

But I know, but the general demographic of Glassons, though, it doesn't like. No, but you think of the couples that, like, I get a hand pull if we're in the mall and I'm like, oh, I just want to go into like Mecca or something. You can get a hand pull from your partner. Mecca would be another one. I'm spending hours and hours in Mecca and Sephora. Yeah, but like, I would be able to go in there if there was something for them. I'll design a little section there for you.

That's a good idea. Yeah, there you go. That's great of you, Dan. Speaking of shopping. We're doing it in China. China does it well too. They've got that other system where if you're stuck in traffic

and you're late for a meeting, you call the service. Two people turn up on a scooter. You get out of your car. You hop on the back of the scooter. The other person drives your car to where you are. Oh, wow. So you arrive there on time.

Amazing. Tell you what, it's the world's superpower, China. Yeah. Love it. I'm just saying that on record, too, that if they take us over, I love China. But yeah, speaking of shopping, I had an incident yesterday, probably my daughter, she's back to school today, but she got a yesterday. Poppy, my daughter, she's back to school today. But she had got a Prezi card from my mum for Christmas.

Oh, I want to spend the Prezi card. I want to spend the Prezi card. And so I've been putting it off. And then we finally, okay, I've got to go to this shop. I won't mention the shop. But there was this, something was happening yesterday. And it drew quite a crowd. Oh, right.

Okay. And then outside the shop, like they actually had to drip feed people into the store. Oh, that happens from time to time, doesn't it? Yeah. Now, the frustrating thing is it was set up like waiting for a ride at Rainbow's End or something that sort of worms and squiggles around. So we got to the back of this line, and it wasn't moving. We're in there for 25 minutes, and I'm impatient like I hate waiting for things.

And the thing that frustrated me is probably I was in here yesterday. I walked past the shop yesterday. 25 minutes and I'm impatient like I hate waiting for things and the thing that frustrated me is like probably I was in here yesterday I walked past the shop yesterday you could just walk into the shop right no one was out

you could just freely walk in yeah but then it was like specials happening right yeah but then I'm like we'll come back tomorrow we'll come back today specials happening tomorrow

I pulled her out I pulled her out I stopped the madness 25 minutes we're not moving anywhere I'm not spending any of my time it was peak consumerism

and we were all just the little rats being played how did that go for you with her was she not well not well

no silent treatment deal with that for the rest of the day but nothing creates a bit of a frenzy like a line yeah we love it we love a line

we line up you know I've spent a lot of time at theme parks over the holidays in a line yeah we love it we love a line we line up you know I've spent a lot of time at theme parks over the holidays in a line because I didn't have the fast track

oh here we go we're back here Megan hashtag gifted you're gifted you didn't pay for it yeah you know

if you don't know the backstory Megan and Ben were both on the Gold Coast at the same time Ben was steaming waiting in lines at theme parks

waiting in lines people were fainting without a word in lines. People were fainting. Without a word of a lie, people were fainting. Give them a fast pass. They are so much more expensive. Right. I could go to the theme park. Not when they're hashtag gifted, baby.

Many times as I wanted for over a week. I bought a seven-day pass. Loyal. Yeah, look, but that was cheaper than a fast pass for one day. How am I getting it and not you? You went viral. I'm just like a pleb. There's going to be no resolve to this argument.

This is like your Trump and Taylor Swift debate that's going on. Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hits. Now, I went to the movies to see Baby Girl. If you haven't heard of this movie, it's the new Nicole Kidman movie. Oh, this is the one where she falls in love with a junior at the work and she's the powerful ceo yeah an abusive power is it yeah i guess so i guess so

this is a little bit from the movie are you gonna drink that don't drink that good girl so what's she saying there you're gonna going to drink that, don't drink that. Was it like a fly in a glass of champagne or something? It was a glass of milk at a restaurant that had been ordered by the intern. I don't want to ruin it. Like this is, it's very, a lot of people are saying it's better than Fifty Shades of Grey. Oh really? Erotically charged. Erotically charged.

Erotically charged. And there's a real power dynamic. And the movie starts with some full-on scenes. Straight away. Yeah. So I was warned, and I'd been reading about this movie. I was like, I know you go with it with your bestie. You don't go with your parents. You don't go with your parents.

You do not go with your parents. This is a PSA. Ben watched Bridgerton with his mum and that was a nightmare, wasn't it? I watched some of that and I was like,

oh, this is a bit much, a little spicy. A little spicy for me and Jenny here. Don't make any movements. Suddenly you get really stiff. Oh, what? No, no.

Sorry. It's a bad choice of words. so i went to go and see the preview and it's so it's really great it's really great my husband also went to see it and he's like i don't i don't get it we went at different times where's the cars of explosions but also he's like there's not enough like nakedness it's's very mentally erotic. Right. But when I went to the preview. I think he wants to go and watch an adult movie. A guy walked out, a young guy, probably in his 20s,

went to the preview with his mum. That's a fatal error you only make once in your life. And he looked pale when he came out. His mum looked like she had a good time. He did not. He, probably even worse for him knowing looked like she had a good time. He did not. He, probably even worse for him knowing that his mum had a good time. Yeah, mother-son movie time.

He won't be going back for round two there. No. I liked it when we went and watched Cars. Yeah, with Lightning McQueen. I remember going to Team America with my parents thinking that was a fun puppet movie. Also, it was the director's cut. Look that up. It's like even

more. They did get adventurous with puppets, didn't they? Yeah, they did. It's not really a wholesome kids movie, is it? I don't know what's worse, like humans or puppets going there. But I felt so awkward. There was that one a few years ago,

I don't know if you remember Sausage Party, which was an animated film about sausages. But an adult version of it. My mum was like, oh, I downloaded this for the kids. I was like, maybe don't. She's like a fun dude from the cover. It's like, oh, it's a sausage that's going to, but yeah, no. Let's stop that one.

That sausage goes places. Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hits goes places Now the 2000s The best 2100 songs Sorry from the last quarter century We're counting that down Exactly a week from now We'll be starting 8 o'clock next Friday

This time next week yeah And we're wanting to You know go back down nostalgia street And next week we want to visit Something that was around in the year 2000 But you know there might not be too much of it now. Yeah, something that was huge back then. Yeah.

Sort of thinking like a video shop. We got a text yesterday saying in Morrinsville there's still one United Video. United Video. Whoa. Play it one more time now. Be nice to go back to a video store. Yeah, a very iconic thing So yeah we want some text suggestions

4487 on places that we could visit I mean Cobb & Co Could be a place we could visit Still around Still a lot of restaurants for Cobb & Co Cobb Crunchies Do they still do those? I don't know

I don't know Cobb Crunchies Yeah you're right Crunchies, traffic lights We went to Cobbanko Rotorua, and it was one of the first restaurants to introduce the robot waiter. Yeah. But they said they weren't like fully, couldn't fully trust them.

There's a few places with them now, though. Yeah, they'll run into each other and sometimes spill some stuff. Like if they were humans, they would have been fired. But they're like, we've invested a lot in these robots, so we'll stick with them. It's the text 4487. The Huntley sign in Decker. The Decker sign

in Huntley. The dyslexic on the radio. The Decker was iconic. Right, there's no Decker stores anymore, but the sign's still there. Get on board to double up and save you nowhere. John O'Bannon Megan The podcast

The hits I was going to say something right now I reckon this is going to come to New Zealand It's going to be big The fridge friend It's apparently massive in Australia Now it looks like a little I guess like a portable wifi

Almost like you put You put in your fridge And it's a filter for your fridge And it basically just runs A little filter inside your fridge And it will make your fruit, vegetables Everything in your fridge and it basically just runs a little filter inside your fridge and it will make your fruit vegetables everything in your fridge last longer like up to double the length of time you know sometimes you end up throwing out stuff because oh that's gone off so this

amazing little invention apparently thousands of people in australia are just reading about buying it and it's saving people thousands of dollars a year what does it do it just filters through so you set a filter for your fridge and I was thinking like to make it look good on camera. I was like, it's just like a little, a little box.

It would be like almost the size of like a portable speaker, I guess. You just put it in your fridge. It connects to the wall. You stick it to the wall and it filters out the fridge. Question.

With how much we pay for fridges, can they not build that into the fridge? Well, yeah, it would be, I guess it would be nice, wouldn't it? But these geniuses have sold 30,000 of them already in Australia this year, and I reckon maybe the fridge trend will be coming to New Zealand. I don't know.

I don't know. But I just feel like- Is it actually working? Or are they like, you need this, and people are buying it, and it's not actually really doing anything? Well, people say double the length of your fruit and vegetables in your fridge. I've bought stuff off the internet, and it's promised to double the length and it hasn't, okay?

Guarantee that. I put my good name to that, all right? Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hits. Brooklyn FC have been doing so well this season, top of the table in the Australian competition for football, and they've got another big game against MacArthur on Saturday night.

We're going to go along and try and help someone win $1,000. A couple of listeners. Yeah, three people kicking the ball from halfway. And if they get it in, one grand. And Nick Becker, Auckland FC CEO, is with us this morning. Good morning. Good morning, Jono, Ben, Megan. How are you?

Good. Lovely to hear your dulcet, powerful football tones. Likewise. It's always a pleasure to be on your show. And how good has the season been so far? I know we're just around the halfway point of the season, but just a dream start for Auckland

FC. Yeah, I know. Exceeding expectations, I think. It's sort of amazing to be top of the table at this point. And the good thing is that no one's getting too far ahead of themselves, but everybody's just really enjoying the moment. I was about to ask you, are we booking tickets to the finals?

I was about to get ahead of myself, but you just said no, no, no. Don't get ahead of yourself. Look, I do have one slight criticism, if I could just be slightly there. Oh, okay. You know, do they have to win in the last 30 seconds? You know, like, you know, it feels those little heart attack moments where, you know, they win in the final moments. Tell me about it. It's not good for my health.

Hey, it's a dream that the team just never give up. I mean, that's a really special quality to have. But yeah, I'm with you. If they could start scoring a few more in the first half. Not as exciting, though, as what I hear is happening at halftime with you guys. Oh, wonderful segway. I hear you guys are halftime with you guys. Oh, wonderful segue. I hear you guys are showing off your football skills. Do you like that?

Am I getting good at these segues? Yeah, it was a great segue. Well, yeah. So we're giving three listeners the chance to win $1,000 by doing a kick from halfway. No one in the goal. So what do you reckon the chances are? Because we don't kick a lot of footballs in our job. But, you know, for getting people cold off the stands,

I mean, maybe they're not cold, but cold in the fact they probably haven't warmed up. What do you reckon the chances of that happening? I've probably got more faith in the fans in the stands, to be honest, than you do. Don't take it personally. It's actually quite a far distance. I'd love to see it happen, but it's a big ask.

No keeper, and it only has to dribble across the line. They don't have to like strike it in. It's still 50 something metres though isn't it? I'm trying a glass half full guys. You've got to believe. I'm just saying Jono and Ben you're both having a crack at it aren't you? Well we might have to.

We had by the sounds of it. We had land on it. Play the Benny Hill music. Have we overshot the marquee, you think, Nick? Well, it's sort of, you know, it's kind of, I always go for something that I know I'm going to be good at. That's what happens when you get old in life, you never take up new things. You know you're going to be useless at them.

So that's all I'm saying. And we don't want to put on a fizzer of a halftime show. Maybe if all three miss, maybe we need a plan B that we can go forward a little closer maybe, just so someone can walk away with $1,000. Yeah, move the halfway line to the 18-yard and figuratively, not literally.

It would be a nightmare for the second half if you did that. Absolutely. Now we've all been to Auckland FC games. Producer Grace, she's very loyal. She goes week in, week out. Who's the most famous fan you've come across, Nick, in your travels? It's good to see the guys like, you know, Dan Carter, famous rugby player.

Oh, wow. Great guy, big family man, but loves coming along, loves bringing his kids along because they play football. I think that's the thing where so many, you see so many kind of parents, kind of whether they're famous faces or not, they're there with their kids and there's a really great family atmosphere at the games and they're coming along often with that kind of like pester power that

children have over their parents. I'm a dad of two, I know exactly what it is and they can just leave them to it, grab some hot chips down there, whatever it may be and you can sit in the stand with your mates and have a good time as well. So it's a good family experience. What I have noticed too, you are pumping out the merch. Oh, yes.

So many people have merch. The lines for the merch. Totally, totally. We've struggled to keep up. It's a really hard one to get at the start of the season where you go, you know, how many people are going to buy our shirt today? It's over 20,000, which is just blowing us away. And, you know, you kind of, you see them every day.

I dropped my son off at school holiday. And there's like about five AFT shirts. And I'm like, this is, yeah, it's blowing us away. And we couldn't be prouder. We couldn't be happier about it. You're just walking around going ka-ching, ka-ching, ka-ching. Ka-ching, ka-ching. It's so good to see the team's been performing.

The crowds are getting out there. We can't wait to come along Saturday. Five o'clock kickoff. There's still some tickets, not many, so people need to get in fast if they want to come along. It's going to be great at Go Media Stadium. Look forward to seeing you there, guys. Jono, Ben and Megan.

The podcast. The hits. The New Zealand Herald Daily Quiz is how we like to start our day. Producer Ali in to read us the questions. The Quiz Queen. We're still partying. We're still partying from the highs of our win yesterday. Gee whiz.

Am I on? I am on. Hello there. Hi. Sorry, come in. Yes, hello. That was quite a transition between those two songs. Sorry.

It was straight from Brian's. I don't know how I feel about the new quiz music. Yeah, okay. We can go back to the OG one if you wish. Quiz Queen, can we do two in a row, two days in a row, 10 out of 10? I think you can. Probably not. All right, okay.

Question number one. What rapper released the hits Wild Thing and Funky Cold Medina in 1989? Tone Loke. Well done. That's correct. Tone Loke. He was an correct Tone Loke he was an actor for a while he was in Ace Ventura

the first movie to fucking call him with the I know the song but like Tone Loke T-O-N-E I think

a new word L-O something L-O-C nice new word wild thing what a voice Tone low.

Wow, man. This would be a banger at the strip club, wouldn't it? Yeah. There we go. We've got the first one without even multi-choice. All right. Well done. Tone and you word low.

Yeah. I'll just spell it out for you. Yeah, thank you. All right. Question number two. Which country has the longest coastline in the world? Is it Canada, Australia, or Russia? You say Russia.

That's the biggest country landmass in the world, isn't it? But is it coastline? Yeah. It's all coastal, the edge of... No, but Australia's, like, really big, isn't it? Australia is all... Coastline. Oh, right where the interior of Russia is,

yeah, rolls into Ukraine and stuff. I see what you're saying. What about Canada? How big is Canada? Yeah, Canada's... Yeah, Canada's got big... Are we throwing it out? We can throw it out.

Yeah, let's throw it out. I think I know the answer judging by producer Ellie's facials, but anyway. Are you being to Canada? Yeah, well, I'm feeling like it's Canada based on her facials. Well, do you want to go?

Let's not waste the lifeline if the facials are telling you. Yeah, well, I'm feeling like it's Canada based on her facials. Well, do you want to go, well, let's not waste the lifeline if the facials are telling you. Yeah. I know, it really feels like Bradley Walsh

could help out a few more people on the chase with his facials. it would be Australia, but... Yeah, well, according to facials,

I'm just going on facials alone, I'm going to lock in Canada. That is correct. I'm the same with you, Megan, I would have probably gone with that,

but anyway. You know me too well, Ben. Brian Adams would have known the answer to that. Yeah, true. All right, question number three.

Who is the most followed person on Instagram as of 2020? Oh, that's Selena. Oh, yeah. It was Selena. Is it still Selena? Well, the options are Sam Smith, Cristiano Ronaldo, or Taylor Swift. So it's not Selena. Yeah, it'd be Ronaldo.

That is correct. Well done. How many has he got? I'm glad you didn't like his lock in Selena. It's a bit cocky, wasn't it? I'm not sure how many he's got actually. I didn't do the background research. 300 and something.

Wow. Good insights. A million. Yeah, good on him. All right, question number four. I think you guys can get this. Who was the longest reigning monarch in British history? Was it James VI, Queen Elizabeth II, or Queen Victoria?

It's Queen Elizabeth. Oh. That is correct. Sorry, 648 million. Oh, wow. That's so many. Okay, let's take a question to the ads here. We're on a good roll, thanks to some facials.

All right, question number five. Which country is famous for inventing tea? Is it China, India, or Japan? Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hit. Oh, a plane crash in America overnight too. We'll have more in the news very shortly,

but no survivors between a plane crashing into a helicopter. So yeah, horrible stuff going on there. But we're in the middle of the New Zealand Herald Daily Quiz. The Quiz Queen. Producer Ellie, fresh off a 10 out of 10 yesterday and things looking positive. They are. Five deep, are we?

Yeah, you are. This is question number six. So, who composed the famous Ninth Symphony? Was it Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Ludwig van Beethoven, or Johann Sebastian Bach? I think it's Beethoven. I feel like I should know this. Oh i just feel like the night simply feels famous and it feels like yeah but then you say those names and they're all famous composers as beethoven what was the other two they didn't

have like real distinctive names like very cruel summer and you know like for their songs they're all like symphonies and symphonies yeah yeah and they'll hear that yeah i know what you're saying they all seem they they sound the same yeah when you read yeah they're not doing hot juicy and wet or whatever oh my god i wish park did that yeah but easier to understand what the song is what is not juicy and wet i still don't understand What the song is I don't know what it is Jono It's a steak

A wet steak Let's go Can we run through those names Once again Sorry I know people Are probably screaming At the radio right now Yeah it was

Beethoven Mozart Or Johann Sebastian Bach We haven't used our lifeline Do we want to Yes Sorry

Use the lifeline Yes I was just meaning Don't trust Jono. Okay. 4487 on the text if someone can help us out there. Because I feel like it's Mozart, but you think it's Beethoven. No, I've switched to Bach.

Oh, wow. Okay. No closer. No. Okay. I have switched to Bach. Okay. Bach.

I was listening to some classical music the other day. Oh, yeah? How was it? Apple music. Well, it was clearly confusing Because I can't remember who was doing what Someone said text come through Beethoven

Yeah, you want to lock that one in? That's the only text that's come through so far Well, this person might be wrong That is correct You were right Were you actually listening to classical music? I was, apparently it's good for your mental state. Oh, okay.

Did you feel relaxed afterwards or anything? No, it stressed me out a bit. It was quite like... You're sometimes quite aggressive, right? I'd rather just listen to a river or a lake or something. All right, question number seven. What year was YouTube founded? 2003, 2005, 2008

You got this 2003, 2005, 2008 Not 2008 I reckon it might have been Oh really? Yeah That's a long time ago 2008

We've got to go with something Let's go with 2008 That is incorrect Yeah It was 2005 2005 Yeah Facebook

Everyone got on Facebook Like 2009 or something right Yeah around then I think 2006 actually Was when Facebook started But then it didn't become popular Until like 2011 Yeah

YouTube was before that 2009 Yeah Well there we go We've learnt something today. That's okay. Sorry, guys. And we've failed at that one.

Jono, Ben and Megan. The podcast. The hats. And it's time for Dame Sophie Pascoe. She's announced her retirement from competitive swimming, our most successful Paralympian athlete with 11 gold medals, seven silver and one bronze. That's a heck of a lot of medals.

An amazing career, and I'm sure she'll do amazing things after swimming. Well, congratulations on your professional life there, Sophie Pascoe. And no doubt, so I'll just say what Ben just said there. You did a great job, Ben. You did a great job wrapping things up. Now, we've just been talking about workplace nicknames, colleagues that you have in the workplace, and they've got nicknames.

Whether they know about them or not there's some really brutal ones coming through team. Some you can't read out on radio too. But they're hilarious Yeah they are great. Great text here we have a co-worker we call Kit Kat do you reckon you can figure out the back end of that? Taking a break. Always taking a break

Always taking a break. Kit Kat's great We have a lady in the office we call her E.T. because she always wants to go home. It's good. These are great. I was just thinking some of the more risque, why don't we put it on our podcast today?

We'll read a couple on the podcast. You can check it out after the show on iHeartRadio. Good tease from you. There you go. Problem is a lot of people are texting him, but they don't want to come on air because then obviously people will recognise voices. Say your name, John, I'll be like, what's your name?

You're like, now I've said my name. Questions will be asked at work today. We call our boss Noodles because he thinks everything takes two minutes. That's so good. I've been brainstorming ones for us. We did say we wanted some.

Why don't we call Ben Earthquake Drill? He's always preparing for a disaster. Do you like Earthquake Drill? Yeah. It's very catchy. It's a long nickname. Drill.

Ben is much easier than Earthquake Drill. But I get it. It's good. We can call Megan Pinterest. Oh yeah. Pinterest.

Look, she's got the perfectly curated life And makes everyone else feel inadequate It's all the ads Making her own bloody Knocky and doing it all from scratch And all sorts yeah And I can be pre-roll

Like a pre-roll ad On YouTube annoying disruptive And always saying something That no one really wants to listen to I like those Pre-roll drill in Pinterest