Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: The Boys Are Back!

Episode Date: January 22, 2023

Our first show of 2023 5 Words is back! Jono's idea for a convention... Ben in the USA! A Kiwi lady who found her Dad after 31 years Bonus podcast content with Ben's gambling plan.. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This episode of the Jonathan and Benjamin podcast brought to you by Challenge Petrol Service Stations, proud partners of Jono and Ben. I like the Jonathan and Benjamin podcast, makes it sound a bit more sophisticated. Those are now, that's the tail end of the career my friend, when we head upstairs to ZB. The holy grail of retirement and radio. That's what you want, that's what you want right now. Do you know how hard do you reckon it would be doing talkback radio? Because I was actually talking to former colleague of ours, Leah Parnapa. Oh yeah, she's doing talkback radio because I was actually talking to former colleague of ours Leah Parnapa oh yeah she's doing talkback radio right? She's doing talkback and I was talking to her and she was doing nighttime talkback radio and she's like some nights no one would call through

oh my god she just had to talk for like factoring in ads and news 45 minutes no one I would be I don't know what I would do in that situation I don't have the broadcasting skills to even that's a skill isn't it not one and not to make it sound like you're just padding for time

yeah just I would be like mate I'd get you to phone I'd be like Ben can you phone and put up a different voice

every hour and I'll hand it over to you and you talk for 30 minutes and I'll pick it up but yeah really really cool actually we're back first show back today

and you talk about some of the parking tickets that you arrived back to work with. Shocking. And because we do have a park, we park across, you know, across the road. It's, yeah, by the casino is where we've got a park we've got. But it's just a bit of a walk,

you know, it's a 10 minute walk at that time of the morning. And I've started this year, I'm like no more parking outside the building and getting tickets. This is the year of consistent parking there, factoring it as 10 minutes to your day, isn't it, at that time of morning? Yeah. And not getting

tickets because this tank goes around, this car with cameras all around, it just snaps everyone's licence plates. What happened to the good old days when you could have a crack at some nerd and a hat? Who do we abuse now? Friends and I were talking about a parking spot the other day and they had a little thing that nerd and a hat. Who do we abuse now? Friends and I were talking about a parking spot the other day and they had a little thing that we should be doing.

They pitched to us that every morning we meet there, the two of us, buy our cars and then we go to the casino which is close by. We put $5 each on, red or black. You ride red for a month, I ride black for a month and we see how we go. Just $5, that's all dollars that's a great idea every

morning yeah because it only it only works out to be 100 this sounds like proper gambling this is how it happens it's only 155 for the month five dollars five dollar bit each day but maybe the winnings you keep and at the end of the month we give it away you you're north island i'm south island or vice versa. That's a great idea. I don't know how the legalities of that, that's why I'm pitching it on the podcast, not safe for radio, but I was like, there might be something in that.

Why do you think it's safe on the podcast? I feel like the podcast is more like the internet, mate. It's more like the Wild West, you know? No one's going to track you down. That's what Andrew Tate thought. Oh, jeez. No one can get him oh yeah well true that's right and eventually it catches up on you yeah that's a really good thing about that yeah i like that yeah we should do that as well now we're factoring in 10 minutes of gambling everyone i know and that's what my friends were

saying you'll get to know the people there at the same time yeah good day good day charlotte how you doing oh good night mike you know you'll start becoming the blood and'll get to know the people there. And the same time, yeah, g'day. G'day, Charlotte. How you doing? Oh, g'day, Mike. You know, you'll start becoming, they'll be like, and those guys, you know, the word will get out about us too. They'll be like,

every morning, they're in here. Problem is, Ben's not going to start turning up for the show. Where is he? Oh, he's in deep on the pokies. So maybe it's a terrible, terrible idea, but you enjoyed today's podcast. We'll talk more on that on another day.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Jono and Ben back for 2023. Very excited to be back, although the first time we spoke on the radio, we were like, things sound weird in our ears. That's what we said. And then producer Joel, very fastidious producing, said, let's get Bruce the tech, the technical manager.

And so we've got Bruce in, and we figured out we hadn't actually plugged the headphones in properly, Bruce. Well, I don't know anyway I'd like to think there's more to it than that but that may be the case but we'll sort that out very shortly

thanks for coming down but we've sorted it out ourselves mate headphones weren't plugged in properly I don't know anyway have we forgotten

how to do radio I don't know it's been a few weeks as I said before it's really awesome to be back we have missed being here and being part of your mornings

so yeah thank you for tuning back in again and if you haven't missed us just pretend you have yeah and make a fragile ego how was your holiday? squidgy I feel squidgy I come back and feel squidgy and podgy do you feel you don't look squidgy and podgy I don't

I don't know you're not so bad yourself but why do you feel squidgy and podgy well you haven't said you're not squidgy and podgy no it's too late now squidgy and podgy? Well, you haven't said. You don't, you're not squidgy and podgy. you're not squidgy and podgy. No, it's too late now. Is that your, squidgy and podgy? No, you don't look squidgy and podgy.

Oh, no, it's too late. I've made you say it now. No, but you know, when you, I'm just, I'm glad to get back to a routine. Right. You?

Yeah, yeah, no, yeah, it's good to be back. I had a great time though. I went to visit family in the States, which was awesome. You know, went over for family Christmas, hung out with,

you know, with my family as well. We did some, some tourist stuff as well. It was really cool. It was awesome. Don't look at the bank balance. Oh, yeah, that'd be ugly reading.

But it was lots of fun, actually. And it's awesome, you know, we went over there to America with our little cousins for Christmas and stuff. Jeez, kids love Christmas, don't they? Little cousin, she was like, everyone was like, as a joke, don't get up before 4.30 tomorrow. As a joke, we all thought it was a joke, but't get up before 4.30 tomorrow. As a joke. We all thought it was a joke,

but she woke up at 3, waited for the alarm to tick over to 4, 4.31, mate, she's like up at half. Why did you kick your Christmas day off at 4.30? Well, yeah, I was like, oh, we're up now,

let's just get into it. Everyone else is like, we're going back to bed. Yeah, but you're the holy maker of Christmas in the US though. Yeah. They do it well. You know,

it's me like with the pokies at Sky City. It's the grand poo bar, that's for sure. But anyway, glad to get back to a routine and not live the lifestyle of an alcoholic vagrant. Well actually, we want to know this morning because there comes a stage where you first talk to someone during the

year that you say, Happy New Year. And then when do you stop saying that? At what point do you stop saying Happy New Year? Well, I think we've come back too late to the fold too. We've had an extraordinary amount of annual leave backed up. A lot of people have been working for two, three weeks. Can we get it out of our system now though? Can you just give us a call?

I'll wait under the hits. Say Happy New Year. We'll say Happy New Year to you. And then we don't have to say it again for the rest of the year. And we can find out how your holiday was. Were you squidgy? Are you feeling squidgy? Are you squidgy and podgy? Yeah, I'll wait under the hits. Give us a call. Let's get again for the rest of the year. And we can find out how your holiday was. Were you squidgy? Are you feeling squidgy? Are you squidgy and podgy?

Yeah. I'll wait under the hits. Give us a call. Let's get Happy New Year out of the way. If you've been back at work for a while, it probably feels like July already. So you can text us 2448. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. First day back.

Good to be back. Congratulations to the Black Ferns Sevens. The female team won last night. The men's got beaten by Argentina in the Hamilton 7s but congratulations to the woman I noticed I follow

some of the Black Ferns on social media the Ben Boyce and they were staying at a very familiar hotel oh were they? one that we stayed at on the sausage tour

oh really? I think it's the distinction in Hamilton you know the big conference center yeah I know the one yeah it was hey I know that

that would have been blazing up in the 80s, that hotel. Imagine the conferences they were holding in the year of 87. Maybe this year we should put on a conference somewhere. That is a great idea. Yeah, yeah. We'll join on being this important conference. Yeah.

That's great. Everyone can come along if you want to get involved. Let us know if you're free for a conference. What's it about, though? I don't know. We'll work that out. Minor details. We'll get involved in our pyramid scheme

It is good to be back We have missed being back on the radio this morning And we wanted to get a Happy New Year's out of the way Because that's the first thing you say When you talk to people that you haven't seen since last year Alex, previous years I've been writing out to the end of Jan With the Happy New Year But for some reason this year, electronically speaking

I cut it off just Jan 2nd Oh, 2nd? Jan 2nd I was, 2nd? Jan 2nd. I was like, no one cares. When you write Happy New Year in an email, everyone knows it's meaningless. Yeah. It's like that line, I trust this email finds you well. Everyone's like, just get to whatever you want to say.

Hope you're being well. Hope the family are well. No, you don't. You don't care. You just want to look like a nice person before you want to get into really what the email's about. Just get down to business. Debbie, get down to business. Give us a happy new year, mate.

Happy new year. Happy new year, Debbie. How are you? Good. I've missed you on the radio. Oh, I've missed talking to you. How was your summer? Not too bad.

I worked a week early. Went back a week early. Oh, did you pull pin on the, thanks to the weather, did you, Debs? No, my boss rang me in. I definitely wouldn't have answered the phone if I was you. No, we're so busy at work. He said, can you come back? I would have gone, oh, sorry, mate, what's your call?

At a reception? Yeah, no, get back to work. What did you want to do? Oh, you did want to. Oh, yeah, well, the weather's been pretty shocking, hasn't it? But it's on the improve now, which is good. It's all right. They email me if I don't answer.

Oh, I'll just say email. You can come up with excuses. Turn on the out-of-office, Debs. I'm glad to have you back, Debbie. You go and have a great day at the bakery, okay, in Pukekohe. Thank you. Love your work. We'll get it.

Ange? Our mate Ange from Hamilton. Happy 23. Happy 23. You'll come to our conference at the Distinction, won't you? I will, yeah. I don't know what it's about yet, but I think that's how good conferences work. You go, let's do a conference, and you're like, what's it about?

And you work back from there. Exactly. How was your summer, Ange? Yeah, I just stayed at home a couple of days in Rotorua, but, yeah, the weather wasn't the best. I feel like a lot of a lot of holiday goers would have felt somewhat ripped off having to return back to work sitting in rain was that your feeling ang yeah it was not it was nice for us because as i said before lucky enough to go to america

with the family and at the start i was i was fizzing on that it was that was the best you love the fact that you love your football don't't you? So I went to a couple of American football games. We won yesterday. Go Phillies. It's a Phillies thing. She's a big backer of the Philadelphia Eagles, aren't you? But I was, you know, at the start, you're over there, and it's a bit colder, and you see everyone there at the beach,

and it's all like, oh, yeah. And then a couple of days later, everyone's like, oh, it's wet. I'm like, oh, suckers. No, but that Warriors jersey, that was the best. Oh, the Warriors jersey and the Warriors game, that was the best. Oh, the Warriors jersey in the Warriors game. And you're an absolute champion in Hamilton. You're going to have a great day.

It's good to have you back, 23. And we'll get Fiona on. Auckland, how are you, Fiona? Happy New Year. Happy New Year to you as well, lads. Oh, nice to talk to you again. Has your year started all right? Yeah, not too bad.

I mean, we had a week up north with some friends. Obviously the weather wasn't the greatest, but we played board games for 12 hours one day and there was a lot of alcohol consumed, but we had fun. This is Fiona. Fiona, I've been editing your voice over New Year's

for something that means... It's a bit creepy. It's an online scam he Yeah, sorry, it's a bit creepy. But I was like, I've listened to this one. It's an online scam he's doing. Yeah. Voice recorded. Hi, it's Fiona.

Now, you told a story last year on the radio about fornicating with your boyfriend and then you put the protection and the dog food and your mum poured it out. Yeah. Yeah, that's me.

No, I've been listening to that story over and over. Oh, that story's made me laugh. Oh, Fiona, well, I hope the years are all good for you. Thank you so much for listening. It is good to be back. And actually, Fiona, stick around, because we predicted something before Christmas.

I didn't think it was going to happen so early. No, but you put it out there, and we'll get to that next. It is The Hits. You've got Jono and Ben. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Brand new from Pink. It is The Hits, Jono and Ben podcast. Brand new from Pink. It is the hits, Jono and Ben. She had a lovely thing to say about Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern

on social media as well over the last week. She said, you have my admiration, my respect, my well wishes. There will never be another like you, although I wish there were. No, she actually wrote that about you. No one's ever said they have my admiration or respect. Barack Obama had some lovely words to say about you as well. No, that was Jacinda Ardern as well. Yeah, a lot of people all over the world saying some lovely things overseas.

Well respected on the world stage. Also well respected in rural communities too. And I think that's what happens when you're in the job for a long time. It happens for every politician. There's obviously decisions that make, that affect people's livelihoods and people's lives. And sometimes you can be popular and then not be so popular towards the end of it.

And you can't keep everyone happy. You'd be a nightmare in that job, mate. I couldn't do it. I could not do it. You'd be chopping and changing as soon as... What, you want now? Oh, there's a protest. Are they saying not nice things

Yeah Yeah no it's so And a tough gig Like Relentless Every single day You're doing that job You're working

There's no time When you're not off Yeah You know the sacrifice That those Particularly prime ministers Have to make Their families have to make

As well And she came back And resigned obviously She did She came back and resigned, obviously. She did. She came back. She said, I've got nothing left in the tank. I'm like, isn't that just being an adult? I've never got anything left in the tank.

Running on E. Just the smell of petrol fumes getting this motor along. I imagine that job is just all-encompassing. When she was announcing it, I was like, wow, she might be the only other person who looks more exhausted than i do after coming back from a holiday like she looks tired yeah and you can understand why and i'm sure sometimes when you go so hard you're like you can keep up that pace but it's when you stop that you start to get tired so maybe that's what happened over the holiday period i don't know i'm

just saying words on the radio uh But Ben, we made a wild prediction not but five weeks ago. Was it wild? It was wild. No, because everyone's like, I picked it, I picked it, but no one's got proof that they picked it. Thanks to the wonders of modern audio technology,

we have proof that we picked it. Well, yeah, you said it with confidence. This was a few weeks ago before the end of the year. This is what Jono said. Have a listen. So we're going to have to make 23 predictions for the year 2023, all right? What are you predicting? Here's a wild one, okay?

I'm going to chuck it out early. Ardern, she's stepping down before the next election. I'll leave that with you. You did say that in the last one as well. I'm not sure if you can repeat predictions. Did I say it with that confidence, though? Because that sounded bloody confident. You can't keep saying it.

I just used your surname. I was like, Ardern, she's stepping down next election. That sounded like I knew what I was talking about, like I had an inside word. Put him on ZB. Hosking, step aside. Very early on in the year, too. Early, too.

Yeah, it came along early. But no no I think whether you sit whatever side of the political spectrum you sit on you do have to give your thanks to these people

for sacrificing so much you know so much as you say whatever way you vote and you know that's up to you Jacinda

you take that all away she is a genuinely lovely person and like caring and kind and always has a lot of time for us on the show which has been awesome and i don't think anyone who gets into that job wants to do a bad job has ever been a prime minister in the history of prime ministers going you know what i'm gonna

come in here i'm gonna tank this country maybe that'll be chris hipkins maybe it's a good angle the hits the jonah and ben podcast it's little max it is the hits. Jono and Ben, 6.37 on your Monday morning. The Red Hot Chili Peppers were in town over the weekend as well. Flea did a handstand from Red Hot Chili Peppers on stage. Do you know Anthony Kiedis is 60? I was watching bloody... So was Brad Pitt this year too. I know.

I watched Top Gun over the... Yeah, it's great, eh? Great film. The whole time I'm like, he's 60. And Oscar, my son, is like, he looks 30. And I was like, how old do I look? He'm like, he's 60. At Oscar, my son's like, he looks 30. And I was like, how old do I look? He's like older than Tom Cruise. He looks magnificent.

Anthony Keener's probably the same. Sexy. They don't need any motivation for their Monday, but we do right now. Let's get into Motivational Monday. It's just another motivational monday great way to start the year with a bit of uh motivation ripped off youtube uh i actually really love uh following these accounts that you know like where they pop up in your instagram face facebook

whatever you you know your social media platform is but they give you a little motivational bits they do yeah just inspire you for the day i saw a good one from Snoop Dogg yesterday actually, of all people. He's like, you know, everyone wants to be a boss, but sometimes bosses are bossy. The best... Bosses, they are bossy. One of the

big job descriptions of becoming a boss is being bossy, but he's like, sometimes people get too bossy. When you want your employees to actually be better than you, You know, that's a good boss. No, you don't. You want your employees to be worse than you. Otherwise, everyone's going to roll you. You're right. You're right. Now, this one, as I said, I like motivation on the internet. I love these things from time to time, but this one confused me just a little bit. The point of this, have a listen to this

when you go for a walk with someone something happens without being spoken either you adjust to their pace or they adjust to your pace whose pace have you adjusted to i love it like he's he's saying it you can you can see it you can hear the moment where he's like I've just cracked the meaning to life I've just but then isn't that the basic structure of a two person walk

is you want to like I'm not going to go hey Ben want to come for a walk but I'm going to spend the whole time 15 metres ahead of you because it's a weird walking yeah I know but I guess he's saying

that someone at one stage has to sort of either slow down to work with the other person or speed up, depending on who is the person leading and who's not. So the lesson is here, don't walk with anyone. Well, yeah, maybe. Go for solo walks.

Yeah. My wife's always like, slow down, slow down. Or I can imagine you'd be a frantic walker. Yeah. You'd be one of those guys who's got the hips going side to side and you're hardly lifting your feet off the ground. But then you go out for what happens when I'm walking the dog. I mean, he's sniffing this,

he's peeing on that. You know, like, what happens then? Am I walking at his pace or is he walking at my pace? I imagine that dog's dragging you along at his pace. There's about 40 kgs difference between the pair of you. Well, that was some great motivation there, Ben. Someone's controlling the pace, aren't they?

What, you are now, right? And that was shocking pace. I actually lost what I was thinking. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Jono and Ben, back with you on The Hits this morning. Good morning. It's fun being back. Great messages coming through, Ben, on the text machine. 4487, great to have you back, guys.

Miss you, guys. Oh, does it? I never read the text machine. I ask you what it's like. I'm always too nervous to read the text coming through. And you kind of give me like, oh, that's good. It's good. And like I'm always too nervous to read the text coming through and you kind of give me like oh that's good it's good and then I'm like

yeah I kind of play defence don't I between you and the text machine but yeah I'm going to print those out we do we love waking up

in the mornings and spending the mornings with people that listen you know and hang out with us in the mornings it's great and that's

we've worked on some other radio stations where people will say some horrible horrible stuff to us on the text machine I'm sure there are people out there that are thinking that,

but it's lovely to get But they don't express it, so thank you. You can sit with those thoughts, that's fine, but just don't text them. No, I don't want to read that. We know those thoughts

throughout the day. 6.44 in the morning. Hey, Netflix, they've got a job going. I know some people, maybe Jacinda might be looking for a new gig. Netflix,

they've got a private plane that they fly people around the world in and they, you know, Ben Boyce, you got a great TV idea? Ben's like, yeah, I've got 22. No one wants them. Yes, Netflix. And they're like,

oh, we'll check you on our private plane, fly you over to Los Angeles for a meeting. Oh, wow. But what they need on that plane is obviously pilots and a flight attendant. And so the job for the flight attendant is going at the moment, you get over half a million dollars. Yeah, over $500,000 is what you get for it.

Which is crazy. And a lot of, I think, the big highlight of the gig is discretion because you can't have loose lips coming like, Ben Boyce came over to Los Angeles with 22 TV ideas you know you'd be no good in that job I would be shocking flight attendant

as soon as I land I'd be texting Brad Pitt was on the plane today mate signed up to a five year movie deal heard of Tom Cruise

yep gave him some bloody cheese and crackers I bet you'd be reading their laptops behind their shoulder all sorts that would be a nightmare

The Hits The Jono and Ben podcast. Prince Harry has made a lot of news over the last couple of months with his autobiography, Spear, and we're crossing live to the UK. Kate Oliver is with us. Good morning. How are you? I'm fine.

You know, it's absolutely freezing cold, so we're glad to speak to somewhere that's slightly warmer, I would say. Can you feel the humidity? Can you feel the high temps coming through the phone lines, Kay? I can. I'm warming up already. Yes, good. Now, are people still talking about the Prince Harry book?

And please say they are because we've decided to talk to you today on our first day back. What is the feeling over there? I mean, obviously he's revealed a whole lot. Well, the feeling here is that he mean, obviously he's revealed a whole lot. Well, the feeling here is that he has come out with this book and it's broken all records. It's gone I think, was it more than four million

on its first day of sales worldwide and people here definitely are talking about it. There's also the thought that he's only revealed half of what he could have said, and it basically means that there could be another one of these books to come, which I'm sure has a few people quaking in their boots.

He's got a spear, the sequel. More. It felt like he revealed probably too much. I mean, you know, from everything from getting it on outside a pub to something that, Jono, that you wanted to talk about. He tells a touching story about applying some Elizabeth Arden cream to a special part of his body, Kay. I'll just play you the audio here. My penis was oscillating between extremely sensitive

and borderline traumatized. I'd been trying some home remedies, including one recommended by a friend. She'd urged me to apply Elizabeth Arden cream. My mum used that on her lips. You want me to put that on my todger? It works, Harry. Trust me. I found a question, Kay. Did any, at any point, did anyone say to him, you don't have to put that in the book? Well, I don't know.

I mean, basically, it's up to him to say what he likes. I mean, yes, some very interesting revelations coming through there. And I really, I don't know where I would put my nighttime cream, but it certainly wouldn't be down under. You imagine a conversation, he's like, shall I go with the Elizabeth Arden Todger story? And someone said, that's a rock solid idea, Harry. Type it up, baby. One of the things I found, and someone pointed this out on social media,

obviously Harry and Meghan have said that they want privacy in their lives. But for people that want privacy, they've obviously got a six-part doco on Netflix, a tell-all book. Maybe a follow-up book. Yeah, chat interviews and the talk shows in the UK. Do you think that's maybe swayed public opinion towards them, the fact that they are wanting privacy on one hand and then they're doing a whole lot of interviews

and a whole lot of books and all that? Well, do you know something? I think that's a fine point here. Do you want to be a private couple living in your lovely house in Montecito in California and keeping a low profile or do you want to be in the spotlight and and talk about your your experiences and I guess this is where people aren't quite sure what to think about the royal couple because they're kind of playing it playing it both ways and perhaps one might suggest that um it could be good to turn the volume down now well Well, we're all like, oh, keep it private, keep it private,

but holy smokes, I'm lapping it up, Kay. I am sopping every last bit of information up. The UK, the people in the UK, they're loving them, they're hating them. Where are they sitting now popularity-wise? Well, popularity-wise, I mean, I think that Harry was one of the most popular members of the royal family, and I have to say he was way up there. And since the story has come out, since Sparrow has been published and all this kind of publicity,

he seems to now be in the negative zone. And really, his popularity has dipped considerably, of course, along with Meghan, who was also, she was up there, and they were a very popular couple, and her ratings have slipped into the negative area as well. From two people here, we were once a popular couple as well, and our popularity slipped. Yeah. If you do find out how to bring that back, you know...

I know, why don't you put the Elizabeth Arden somewhere else? That's on your faces. Now, we've got Kay Oliver with us, our UK correspondent. Now, obviously, Harry has said some stuff in the book about the family, about his brother, about his father. Do you think the relationship can be patched up after this? Oh, I think behind closed doors. I mean, one can only assume what the fallout from this is going to be.

And, of course, these are all things that none of us were party to at the time. And I think with their relationship, they will have to work very, very closely to perhaps bring it all back to where it was before. You can imagine. Will could come out with a book as well. It'll be like they're getting more books in the Harry Potter series, just unloading on each other. Yeah, because the coronation, when's that happening?

Is that May? Is it like a three-day coronation for Charles? Absolutely, absolutely. It's going to be May the 6th at Westminster Abbey, and he is going to, King Charles III, is going to acknowledge basically that he is a king for the people and he's going to represent refugees, volunteering, diversity. There'll be, of course, the usual appearance

on the balcony at Buckingham Palace, but today it's kind of been said that it's very unlikely that Meghan and Harry are going to be on this Buckingham Palace balcony. I dare say they probably won't be getting a cheeky calendar invite, will they, to the coronation? Well, good on you, Kay. Really appreciate your time.

You're looking after yourself in the UK. Pleasure. Stay warm. We're going to have a new Prime Minister this week. Chris Hipkins. You know him, of course, from the Spread Your Legs comment, but also on the news, on News Hub the other night.

This question they asked him. Are you New Zealand's first ginger, Prime Minister? I think it was about time we had a ginger at the top, but I don't know. Yeah, I'm sure you can do the research. What a legend of a question. What a shout out

to that news reporter. Congratulations. You gained a lot of credibility and lost a lot of credibility with one question. It was beautiful. I mean, there's a certain section of New Zealand loving it right now.

And Hippo, he said, you might be the first redhead Prime Minister. I can't think of another one. Can you think, what was Muldoon packing? He was like, you mate. I know, but it was downstairs, we don't know. Oh yeah. So Chris Hipkins

is going to be Prime Minister. Jacinda Ardern of course, first week back of the year, she said this. And so today I'm announcing that I will not be seeking re-election. And that my term as Prime Minister will conclude no later than the 7th of February. Quite emotional, wasn't she? Yeah, it's a big decision.

And I imagine once you got that decision out, I'm sure the weight of the world came off. She said she had her best sleep ever. Yeah, I was just going to say that. She slept really well the next night. I wasn't in the room. I made it sound like she was pretty rock solid sleep there. Just eight consecutive

hours of sleep there. But yeah, she was New Zealand's youngest Prime Minister, wasn't she Jacinda? And Hipkins, New Zealand's youngest looking Prime Minister as well. He does look about 12, doesn't he? He's got a consistent teenage boy look. Great. Youthful existence.

He'd be like Tom Cruise when he's 60. He looks like a primary school kid in a suit and a tie ready to go. I would love to see him not in a suit and a tie. What does he look like? Anyway, I'm sure we'll find out. I want him in a flat peak cap. A Monster Energy flat peak cap. That's how I want to see my Chris Hipkins.

But jeez, is he a lamb to the slaughter, the poor hippo? Has he been handed the poison chalice? It seems that way as well. But you wanted to do something this year. It's a new year. We've got a new prime minister. You want a new game. New segment. Don't worry, there's not much other new stuff coming. The rest of it's just the same old babble. But this is You've Been Sentenced.

So we start a sentence and you just finish it. Simple as that. And the question you want to chuck out, or the sentence you want to throw out today, Ben. I quit my job when... So like, you know, like Jacinda Ardern, she quit her job when she decided she didn't have enough left in her tank.

It was, you know, she'd done everything she wanted to do and she decided to move on. So she could have called up or that. You've quit your job when? I walked out mid-shift. You like to always hang this over my head, don't you? The shame of walking out mid-shift as a waiter.

I just walked out, had enough. I don't think they missed me, to be honest. They rostered you off for the next shift. They didn't even notice me. It'd be like if I walked out of this place. They'd probably still roster me on. No one would notice I was gone. At a previous workplace we were at, Ben, before we came to work at this company,

we walked out of our job when we announced we were coming here. And we had heard these wonderful days, glory days, of being marched out of the office. Because then you're like, you're factored being marched out of the office. And also they've got some contracts that have a restraint of trades. You can't work for a certain period of time. And we're like, mate, we are off for eight months. We're like, oh.

They'll march us out, they'll still pass because they don't want us getting all the confidential information and being in the building. But they were like, they didn't care. You're like, no, you're working out to Christmas. And you're like, oh. But you look angry.

You want us to leave, don't you? And the boss was very level-headed. And so we had to ride those awkward few months out. So that's the question, the sentence this morning. I quit my job when? We'd love to hear your stories of quitting jobs. We've got some prizes up for grabs from Hell Pizza this morning. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

We played this earlier. This was heading into the Christmas break. We didn't play that earlier. We didn't. Heading into the Christmas break, you predicted't play that earlier. We didn't. Heading into the Christmas break, you predicted something that was going to happen this year. So we're going to have to make 23 predictions for the year 2023, all right?

What do you predict? Here's a wild one, okay? I'm going to chuck it out early. Ardern, she's stepping down before the next election. I'll leave that with you. And you're right. I'll never look like more of a bloody legend than right there Although it was a pretty safe bet

So you wanted to start up I have been sentenced Yeah you've been sentenced So I walked out of my job when? Like Jacinda did That's the sentence this morning And you need to complete the sentence with your stories of walking out of the job When you quit

Quit your job, what happens? I remember quitting a job when I used to write ads to work in, to do a TV show. And we'd already taken a month off. And they'd paid us accidentally because it was like a month without pay. No one pays you accidentally. So they paid us accidentally. We're like, this is good.

We'll quit. And they won't know about the fact that we took that month off and they got paid. But they did know about that. And so we quit. They said, this is good. We'll quit. And they won't know about the fact that we took that month off and they got paid. But they did know about that. And so we quit. They said, that's fine. That's fine. You quit.

That's fine. But we have paid you for a month. So you need to work four more weeks for us. And you're like, but you paid us for that. That was a while ago. You're like, yeah, we know. But you need. So that was pretty much like working out like a month without pay.

It was like, oh. That's the thing with payroll, Ben. They're pretty good at remembering when they've paid you. Yeah, so that's what happened when I quit. That's how this business has managed to go on for so many years. They've just paid people and forgotten and gone, we did that good, guys. Oh, we might as well just keep paying him.

I know he's not turning up to work. We'll kick it off with Chris in Taranaki. Morena, Chris, great to have you back for 23, mate. How's it going? Bloody good, bloody good. You walked out of your job. Yeah, yeah, that was the best thing I've done. We had a new CEO, and he was making life very difficult.

He said that if we don't like what he's doing, we can tell him to shove it where the sun doesn't shine. Yeah. Great man. So he said this. He was like, hey, if you don't like it, you can tell me that. Yep, yep.

And every month we had a manager's meeting with 10 other farm managers and the supervisors and the office managers would all meet up and go over the month's budget and go over everything. Come around to me and had my chance. So I got up and had my resignation letter tucked away. It felt like I was trying to smuggle it into the office. And, yeah, told him, here's my resignation letter.

You can shove it where the sun doesn't shine. And half of the managers started clapping. Oh, that's brilliant. And it was quite an interesting scene too, watching him put that envelope where the sun doesn't shine. Good on you, Chris. That's great. Appreciate it.

Hook you up with some hell pizza. You have a great year. Yeah, awesome. You too. See you. We'll go to Ohakuni. Monica, you're on. Hi.

Hi. I walked out of my job when? Oh, this was just after the first lockdown from COVID. Yeah, I worked every day during the lockdown on a farm. Actually, I used to work quite a lot of days in a row anyway. But, yeah, I wanted a day off during the week so I could go away and do some shopping and things that you have to do. Yeah.

And he said, you can have a day off on the weekend. I used to work all weekends anyway. Oh, so you were working weekends. You're like, when can I get a day off? And so he wouldn't give you a day off. Could I have Friday off? And that was on a Wednesday. And he said, no, you haven't given me enough notice.

And I said, well, pretty much can do, you know, same things on the weekends as I do on a Friday. So I discussed it for a little while and then I said, um, I think I'll have tomorrow off. That's it? And then you quit? Yeah, I don't think I'll be back after that. I knew you were going to quit.

I knew it was coming. I can sense it. I can sense it. You're going to have to go with some hell pizza, contact delivery, and pick up and delivering beer and wine as well. Thank you so much for your calls and texts. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Just back from holiday, and I was lucky enough to go to the USA.

Now, I do know that you saw some whanau in the US, Ben, and I thought, well, you're going to be regaling tales, regaling fine tales of his travels you know abroad and I thought well it needs some form of an introduction okay okay It's Ben in the USA Oh, I like it Oh, that's very cool Yeah, I made a lot of fun traveling around with my wife, Amanda Kids, Sienna and Indy, man Visiting family, as you said I really did

Made some amazing family memories over there It was really cool Fun country to travel around They're so patriotic Went to a couple of sports games over there And the anthem. The anthem is just a moment that everyone stands up, take their hats off, puts their hand on heart.

They are so proud of their country. We pretend to be proud of New Zealand, but then we get embarrassed of it when it's next to bigger countries at the urinal. And I feel like the people that come out and they're going to sing the anthem. I'm a big responsibility. It's always the acapella, no music as well.

And everyone's like, ooh, tough song. It's like an American Idol where they're like, I'm going to sing the anthem. Ooh a big responsibility it's always the acapella no music as well and everyone's like oh tough song it's like an american idol where they're like i'm gonna sing the anthem like oh tough song tough song everyone knows it too yeah but have a listen this is some of the audio i recorded at one of the games and everyone's like and and then the military, they had helicopters at the football. They flew over as well. And fireworks went off. I was like,

America, fighter jets, America, shot some terrorists down. Oh, you could get more American. She is. She's good.

She's through to bootcamp. Oh no, you're like, you're through. Yeah. Stop. You're there. You're through.

It was pretty incredible. They do it so well. I mean, the sports is just unreal. And I was lucky enough to go across over there to see some of it. But something I understood, something I struggled with over there was the New Zealand accent. Now, they all seem to say to you, oh, I love your accent.

And firstly, you're like, are you taking the pulse? I feel like it's like the missionary of accents. Yeah. Our accent. Yeah. But I realized we must talk quite fast over there. And mumble. Yes.

Particularly me. And it was always a fun game. I'd go, every time I'd go get a coffee from somewhere like a Starbucks or whatever, I would say my name and then I'd go, oh, I wonder what's going to come up written on my cup. And for Ben, I had Ben. That's a regular one. Ben. B-E-A-N.

But if these people just put a little bit of thought into their job and go, what parent would name their child Bin? Yeah. B, you know? And then I was like, well, maybe I'll go American one day, and I was like, hey, it's for Ben. I was like, nailed it. This will be Ben.

And they came up with Pete. Coffee for Pete? And she looked at me, i was like hey am i oh i'm on a peach oh yeah i guess that uh that'll do no it's either that or you took peach coffee yeah well probably did but i did have one moment without a word of lie i was chatting to someone there and the guy was like i love your accent i was like oh do you i said well we probably talk really fast must be really hard to understand he He went, yeah, that's awesome. And I was like,

you totally have no idea. The kids are like, cracking up. They're like, you definitely have no idea what you're saying. Well, it's quite good

because we don't go to Chinese restaurants with you and you're ordering. You always put on the, you put on the, he's like, they understand me better when I'm ordering

my chow mein. And he's like, don't try and do that. Don't, no, don't, mate. No, okay, I'm wrapping you up. He's like, don't try and do that. Don't. No. Don't. Mate. No.

Okay. I'll wrap it up. Swing some sweets. Paul, he's like, I'm from Huntly, bro. Next on the show. Oh, I don't. Why do you railroad these things? The Hits.

The Jono and Ben Podcast. Jono, you were saying you're right back from holiday feeling a little squidgy this morning. I do feel squidgy. Squidgy and podgy. But he didn't say I didn't look squidgy and podgy. And then when I said you didn't say it, and he's like, oh, no, you don't look squidgy and podgy. You don't look squidgy and podgy.

I know. You just look like you. A little bit squidgy, a little bit podgy. Just 12 months of the year, consistently podgy and squidgy. I like it. Well, maybe there's a diet. Because a guy,

and I was thinking about this this morning, the Colombian Navy, they rescued a man from Dominica who survived 24 days at sea on a little boat. And he ate nothing but he had one bottle of tomato sauce, some garlic powder, and some seasoning cubes, like those little OXO cubes as well. And that's apparently what he survived on for 24 days until he was found.

On a bottle of tomato sauce. I mean, you love your tomato sauce, don't you? I do. It feels like you'd end up with a severe vitamin deficiency, like anemia or berry-berry or something. And what are you getting out of those little cubes? The Oxo cubes. Are they like the beef stock cubes?

I'm guessing they're the stock cubes as well, is what he ate. So he had written help on the boat's hull at the front of the boat, but the plane came over and he had a mirror and he managed to sort of reflect some light up towards the plane and that's how they noticed there was a boat down there. Jeez, and he's like, mate, I've got about 10% left. He's got about as much in the

tank as Jacinda did. And he still had the energy after a bottle of tomato sauce and an oxo cube to think of that. Like your brain wouldn't even be functioning correctly. No. You'll be all right if we ever get lost at sea, mate, with old Podgy and Squidgy over here. Shout out on me.

You'll be the first one I'll be eating. Yeah, that's for sure. I'll give you 12 months. A couple of years out there. You're like, they come and rescue you. They're like, mate, he's put on weight. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Let's go. Jono and Ben podcast. Let's go.

Jono and Ben with five words for 5K. Stop any time to keep the cash. Thank you. Or play on to win more. And it's back for another year. Five words for $5,000. Your chance to win up to $5,000 every morning here on The Hits. It's great to be back, isn't it?

Poor old soundproof booth. What's that been up to? Spent Christmas Day with the booth family? Toll booth? The phone booth? There's cousin the kissing booth. Let's get Tilly on from Auckland. Welcome.

You're a teacher, Tilly. I am. When are you starting back, mate? I was just saying I'm starting back on my birthday, on the 1st of Feb, but I'm actually on my way to work now. Already getting in there before. What a nerd.

Yeah, you have to. You do have to. I missed you guys on the radio. Love to have you back again. We've missed talking at you. Yes. Now, Tilly, $5,000, what a way to start 23. What's on the list this year?

What do you need to buy? I just think we need a treat. Javi and I need to do something fun. We've just, yeah, been home the whole holiday working in the garden. Okay, well, let's try and win you some money. Who do you want to send into the soundproof booth? I'm going to send Jono. All right.

All right. I'm heading on in. Jono will head inside the soundproof booth. He is inside right now. So here we go. First word this morning. What pops into your head when I say up? Down.

Down. Exactly what I was thinking. Meow is word number two. Meow. Cat. Cat. Page. P-A-G-E.

Page is word number three. Book. Book. First is word number four. First, F-I-R-S-T. Second. Second. You're playing a good, quick game here.

And hungry is the last one, hungry. Food. Food. All right. Those are your five words. We'll bring Jono back out of the soundproof booth. He's rushing back round now. There we go, smells very stale in there. I can imagine.

Probably has a lot of air ventilation. There hasn't been much going on in there. It's missed you, Jono. It has missed you. It has missed me. It's missed my stinky odour as well. Tilly, let's win you 5K, shall we? Start the year right.

We can try, yeah. All right right let's head to word number one word one 25 25 word i said to tilly up what did she say down yes that would be correct you've got 25 bucks telly thank you i've forgotten how to play this game we give them the option to go ahead don't we we? That's right. That's what we do now. Do you want to jump ahead to word two? It's a $50 word or take your $25? No, we'll go on. We'll go on. Word two, $50.

Fine, so I'd like someone to go, no, I'll take the $25, mate. It's still $25. Give me a pack of smokes or something. Meow. Meow. Meow. Cat. Well done. That's $. Meow. Cat. Well done.

That's $50, Tilly. Do you want to keep that, or do you want to go for the next word, which is $100? Nah, let's go for it. Let's go for it. Word three, $100. Bearing in mind, of course, as per the rules of the game, you get this wrong, you get nothing.

This is for $100. Page. Page. Page. I've got, like, paper? Page? Page of paper? Oh, that was a bit of a tough one. Book.

Oh, Tilly, good answer from you. Yeah, listen, let's just all agree. You're a teacher. You should have thought book. Yeah, well, let's all agree. I've only read one book. It was The Witches by Roald Dahl when I was about eight years old. And the Bible.

And the Bible. I read that every day. Good on you. At least you read the Bible. Yeah, that's right. Amen. God bless. Tilly, you're an absolute champion.

Thank you for playing. I tell you what, should we send you some hell pizza? You want to deliver this lifetime and next hell pizza? We'll give that to you, okay? Thank you so much. Hey, Tilly, lovely to talk to you again, and we'll hopefully talk to you soon. We're going to have a new Prime Minister this week,

Chris Hipkins, who, of course, famously said this. It is a challenge in high-density areas for people to get outside and to sprake their legs. Yeah, so that's... It's going to haunt the poor hippo for years to come, isn't it? I was going to say, do you know Grant Robertson was the best man at his wedding? Oh, was he? Yeah. But not the two I see.

But not the... In the new gig? Yeah. I thought Grant Robertson... Anyway, Chris Hippekins, good luck to him. No, no, no. What were you about to say, mate? What were you going to say?

No, nothing. I just... You felt like there's a better person for the job. No, I wasn't. What were you about to say, mate? What were you going to say? No, nothing. I just... So you felt like there's a better person for the job? No, no, I wasn't saying that at all. I just felt like maybe he's been put out there. Yeah, mate, you'll be good. Yeah. You know, like some people have been a little gun shy of taking that job.

Well, he's... Got on them for taking it. He's taken a lot of hits for the Labour Party. Yeah. He became the COVID minister when old mate went biking. That's right. It was... Anyway.

And then he was the police minister when that didn't go well. And now when this isn't going well, roll out the hippo. He looks to be hosting this show with us. It's not going well either. Roll out the hippo. He's the fix-it man. All good stuff. Congratulations, new prime minister.

Now, he's got some great news to start the year, doesn't he? Yeah, he does. Not me. No. Not me, Ben. Because last week, I'm sitting at home. FaceTime call comes through. And I had a FaceTime call from producer Humphrey, producer B.

Humphrey. And I'm like, I knew what it was. I knew what I was about to answer. So I pick it up and I see this big smiling face. He's like, you've got some mail, mate. And I thought, probably fan mail. The Pryo Maniacs. The official Johnny Pryo fan club.

No. No, the Auckland City Council. I thought maybe it's a New Year's Honours for services to being bullied, bullied for being bald. No. Tickets. On tickets.

You get them sent here and that's everyone's joy Because And my wife works here as well He's on the FaceTime with Jen He's like Look what I've got here And then he's holding up

All these tickets And she's in the background Not looking too impressed You were so smug though Going into the end of Christmas Because you were like They're not even ticketing They must have clocked off

For the year mate Oh look at this I'm just parking outside work We have a car park up the road You're like No don't need that Don't need that because i'm parking outside work they checked out like jacinda checked out and what they were doing and this is they've got a new system right with a camera on the car they don't even get out of the car now it's a ticketing tank and it's this

vehicle with 300 state-of-the-art cameras on just driving around firing off firing off missiles like Putin bang bang bang bang ticket ticket you don't even know you've got a ticket you don't even know until it arrives

all of a sudden one day en masse seven or eight in a row so you've got a whole lot have you? whole lot and then I read the letters

and they're like if you'd like to dispute the ticket you can send us an email well those will be the most useless words I'll type into an email in history, won't they? You've tried that before. And then they always end with, nah, me. Don't nah, me, me.

Giving me a $150 fine for driving down a bus lane. Why do I pay my rates if I can't go down the old bus lane every now and then? What's the point? I'm paid for the bus lane to be painted on the road. Yeah, but you still can't drive down Thank God you get all wound up about that First day back and as we said before It's really good to be back with you

Now, I'm trying not to bang on too much about You know, the holiday time But I wanted to turn something I bought on holidays Into a bit of a game No, don't worry about banging on, mate If you bang on as much as you want, we've got dead air to fill. Ben went to the USA and I thought, well, I want him to bang on, so we've gone to the trouble of even recording you a special musical introduction.

Ben in the USA. Ben in the USA. Regaling us tales of his journeys abroad. It was a fun family holiday. Loved hanging out with the kids and doing some cool things. It was my dream to see LeBron James play basketball. He's my basketball hero, and I got to see him play. It was questionable whether he was going to be playing

because he was injured, and I was like, oh, I've got to travel this way, and he's not going to play. But then I saw him, and I had a few tears, a few tears. The kids are looking at me like, you're weird. Did you start crying because you saw LeBron James in an IRL? I did. And then the next day I looked online. It was like, comedian enjoys game with family.

I'm like, oh, wow, that's awesome. I've made the news in LA. And I was like, Adam Sandler. Oh, yeah, yeah. Sandler's always going to trump you. Yeah, that's right. Well, especially when you're crying. They don't want to put a crying comedian on camera.

Something else that I did over there, I went to see a Golden State Warriors basketball game. And I said to you before I went to love that I was going to wear my New Zealand Warriors jersey and beanie as well from the New Zealand Warriors league team to the basketball team, the Warriors, over there in San Francisco. Now I said, this is taking up some valuable luggage space

when you're traveling. Space is at a premium. And you said, I'm doing this is taking up some valuable luggage space when you're traveling. Space is at a premium. And you said, I'm doing it all for the gram. And I said, well, what number of likes would justify the effort that you've gone to? What did you put? I don't actually know what I've gone to. You said you would have been happy with 200 likes. I saw the photo.

I gave you a like because I knew the effort. Oh, I got 714. So there you go. Bloody great insight. Well, we'll go back. Do it again. Well, I would do it again. But my wife, because I went to the game with her, just got 714. So there you go. Bloody great insight. Well, we'll go back. Do it again. Well, I would do it again. But my wife, because I went to the game with her,

just the two of us went to that game. And she was very, very confused. Have a listen. What's your issue? Why have you brought your New Zealand Warriors, top and beanie, to a game of basketball in the States? Because it's the Warriors. So I thought I'd support the Warriors.

It's a Golden State Warriors. I know, but I bought it basically for Instagram and to confuse some American sports fans. So let's go, Warriors. You're an extra. Is it embarrassing? It's not embarrassing. It's the wrong colours.

You don't even know anyone here and you're embarrassed. I know, right? Yeah, she didn't know anyone in the stadium, but she was a bit like, oh, that guy. Did anyone appreciate it over there? No, they just kind of looked weirdly like, oh, see, that's not the right, you know. But hey, I was happy.

You were like, it's full of gram, guys. It's full of gram, 200 likes, and it'll all be worthwhile. You'll see. But I bought an item. Now, Jono, you don't even know what the random item is. I purchased something in America, and I bought it in, in the suitcase America, and I bought it in the suitcase. So just the item is in the suitcase.

Yeah. And we have to play a game of guess what items in Ben's suitcase. Now, I notice every time we travel through customs, the sniffer dogs like playing this game with you. For some reason, they're concerned. You get a little bit jumpy. So you can ask me any question at all, but I'll give you a yes or no answer uh to do with the item if you can work

out what it is we've got a um you can win the item and uh 100 american dollars which is i think about 155 new zealand dollars shake it again okay what are we listening for oh okay I have a question. Yeah? Will it get me higher than the price of eggs? No. No. So yes or no answers. Okay. It feels semi-weighty. So 0800 the hits.

You'd have to try. I have no idea what's in there. Hopefully you'll narrow it down over maybe today. It might get in the next couple of days. In this world, there are a lot of items, Ben. Yeah, I know. A random American item. What did I buy?

0800 the hits. If you think you know yes or no questions, you can text us as well. We'll get to that. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Came back from a couple of weeks in the States and I bought a random item. It's in a suitcase here in the studio.

Oh, 800 The Hits or 4487. If you can guess what the item is, I'll give you yes or no answers. If you can guess the item, you can win the item and you can also win $100 American, which is about $155 New Zealand dollars. And you can guess the item, you can win the item and you can also win 100 American dollars, which is about 155 New Zealand dollars. And if you just tuned in,

don't worry, all the low-hanging fruit about the suspicious package of Capri and Ben's bag, tick that box. You know, I've matured. I had a moment, I've just like,

I have matured and I was thankful for that because I had issues. I've had issues in the past at the airport, you know, and a huge fine and all that sort of stuff

for a silly thing I did. But in America, you go through and they're very very serious through there and i'm like it's a serious for some reason you feel guilty just traveling through an airport like that don't you but then the guy came and he was like hey i'm gonna give you a pat down i'm like it's fine it's good you know take my shoes off yes would you like me to touch you here would you like me to touch you in private and in my head i'm, there's so many things I could answer to this. But I was like, hey, fine here. It's fine here.

And did it. Then I was like, yes, I've matured. I've made no jokes. I've done nothing. I've done the right thing. You're like, do I have to pay extra for private?

Yeah, it was all those things. It was all those things. And I was like, good on you, Ben. You've matured. And that's good. That was a good lesson. That's a turning point.

Yeah, that's a turning point. That'll be in Ben Boyce's book. Yeah, all right. So this item, I'll shake it around. It's the only item in a suitcase right now. So it's kind of... You're violently shaking the suitcase. I have a question.

Is it breakable? No, no, it's not really breakable. I mean, you could break it, but I'm not worried about breaking it. Oh, 800, that's the telephone number. You guess what's in Ben's bags, and we will give you the item. And $100 US, the current conversion rate, that's about $92,000 New Zealand dollars. That's about $155, but not far off it.

Let's kick it off with Mark in Cambridge. Great to have you back for 23, Mark. What's your guess? Or a question? Well, yeah, is it a piece of sporting equipment? No, it's not a piece of sporting equipment. Good guess, though. Good guess.

I was lucky enough to go a couple of games, but it's not a sporting equipment. Thank you, Mark. Okay. Ooh, is it an oversized pack of Doritos? Ooh. No, it's not edible. It's not edibles.

Okay, there you go, Mark. That's Mark's guesses right now. Good on you, Mark. Appreciate your call. He was a good investigator. Yeah, that was good. Now, Diane has just texted in 4487. She wanted to know, did you have to declare it when you came back through customs?

Did you have to write it down? No, I didn't write it. Should you have written it down? No, no, no. I shouldn't have written it down. Natalie, Natalie, you're on from Auckland. Guess what have to write it down? No, I didn't write it down. Should you have written it down? No, no, no. I shouldn't have written it down. Natalie, you're on from Auckland. Guess what's in Ben's bag? Yeah.

I reckon it is a basketball signed by LeBron James. Oh, jeez. I wouldn't be giving that away. That's for sure. Yeah, I'm happy to give this item away at the end of it. It's not a sporting item but jeez I would love that good guess though jeez you're really overestimating his power to get

within a metres distance of LeBron James yeah I could see him from a long long way away good guess Shelly you're on from the Mount how was the beautiful Mount this morning Shell? absolutely beautiful you should be here it's amazing the problem if I lived in the Mount How is the beautiful mount this morning, Shell? Absolutely beautiful. We should be here.

It's amazing. It's nice there, isn't it? The problem is if I lived in the mount, I'd always feel like I was on a holiday. Yeah? Yeah. We are, always. You don't want that feeling, Johnno.

No, I don't want that feeling. You've got the stress of driving around in traffic in Auckland. Now, Shelley, you can argue... And bad enough down here. Oh, it is? It is. We were there shocking, bloody Cameron Road and Tauranga. Still got the road cones up and down there. Oh, it is? It is? We were there shocking, bloody. Cameron Road in Tauranga. Still got the road cones up and down there? Absolutely.

Yep, one lane. What a great local reference there. It was down there. Road cones, Cameron Road. All right, now what's your guess, or what's your question about what the item is in the suitcase? My guess is a drink bottle. Ooh.

It's not a drink bottle. It does sound like a drink bottle, though. It does sound like a drink bottle, but it's not a drink bottle. it's not it does sound like a drink it does sound like a drink bottle but it's not a drink bottle you did well there mate thank you for your guess we'll take one more quickly megan uh megan from marotoro welcome what is in ben's bag um well my nanny used to have a piano accordion in the nurse suitcase i was wondering if it was that. A piano accordion. It is a random item, but it is not that random. She took a gamble. A piano accordion. I love it.

Someone's texting, is it a piece of clothing? No. No, you can't wear it? No. Someone's also texting, is it a doll that needs inflation? No, not a doll that needs inflation. All right, we'll put it on social media. We'll answer some more questions as well.

And then tomorrow, if it hasn't been guessed on social media, you could be winning it tomorrow as we narrow it down. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, after 31 years of thinking her father was said to have passed away, a lady from Christchurch has tracked her down in the most unusual way. Yeah, and she joins us from the Garden City now. Sharni, how are you? Good, how are you?

Are you Sharni or Sharnay? Sharnay. You could be a Sharnay if you want to mix it up later in life and go, Hey, put an accent above the last E. Yeah. You've made world news. I have. Yeah, so what, 31 years you've gone thinking your father was no longer with us

and now you've tracked him down. How did that happen? I kind of had a feeling when I was a teenager that something kind of just didn't sit right and then I've been searching for so long and I've applied for missing pieces, lost some sounds with no luck. And then I just took it into my own hands and one night just looked on social media and then hours later I found this man that fit every description that I was given.

Wow, that is... So you really did your own episode of missing pieces without the bald guy flying all over the world. The guy looks like my dad. Yeah. So you found what you believed to be your father on the other side of the world. What was that moment like when you started corresponding with him? I literally just messaged this man and I gave him no information.

And what he was giving me back, it was like insanely weird, like uncanny that everything was correct. And then when he said, I could be your dad, I literally just broke down. Oh, I bet you did, mate. What was that moment like? You tell us. Oh, unreal. Like, I can't even describe how it was,

but all I remember was sitting at my doctor's, reading the message, and then just breaking down the floor. Oh, I can imagine the waves of emotion, the feelings that you'd be yeah no so here do you have any idea about you none none whatsoever i imagine when you first messaged him he probably thought you're a bloody european sex bot or something some sort of scam back at one point did you what was the first like when you said you asked him a couple of things what was the first thing you led with? So the first thing I said was, this is going to sound a bit strange, but did you live in Christchurch, you know, 1990 to 91?

And he goes, yes, yes I did. And he's like, who are you? What's your bank account number? And then he's like, how old are you? And you and he's like oh i'm a lot older than what you are kind of thing and then i was like this is going to sound even more strange but did you sleep with you know any woman at this time how do you ask this strange man this question of his sex life well Well, it's gone viral. The conversation that you posted on TikTok viewed more than 10 million times.

It's been viewed. Now, it's not obviously official. 12 million now. 12? Jesus, it's gone up. Check the numbers, Ben. Check the numbers, baby. It's not official yet, but you're hoping to go to the UK.

He's in Wales, from what I understand, and do DNA tests. Yeah. You've spoken every from what I understand and do DNA tests yeah you've spoken every day I understand so what are you hoping for? To mess up 31 years of memories and we've talked we talk every day and

me and my partner we want to get married and he's like I want to give you away that is really special because I imagine going through life and just having well, I want to give you away. Oh, that is really special. Because I imagine going through life and just having this big question mark over your existence for 30 years would be, you would never feel comfortable, I imagine. No. And also, you know, he probably owes you for a few birthdays,

Christmases as well. You've got a few Father's Days to make up for as well. So, you know, there's a bit of that to sort out when you're over there. Well, I hope you get over there. You've started up a Give A Little page, right? I did, yeah. Where can people head to, mate? What do we type in?

So it's actually public on my Facebook page as well. Sharni Butler? Yep, that's me. Or Sharni if she decides on a rebrand. You're next, you're a bit bougie. You're a bit bougie. What a lovely story to start the year with Has he got a family and stuff in wait?

He does, he's got two sons Oh so right, so you might go over there and meet your brothers Yeah I know, how crazy He had some news to come home with from work that day didn't he? Yeah Well that's awesome, well done on tracking him down and I hope it goes well over there and I hope you get to the UK

and I hope it goes really well. If you want to help Sharni out, we'll put the details of her give-a-little on the Hits Instagram. And all the best, Sharni. We can't wait to hear how it goes on. Cool, thank you. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

A lot of driving over the New Year period. You love driving. I do, I do enjoy driving. Yeah. Just sort of alone with your thoughts. And yeah, I don't want my thoughts getting away on me too much though. Yeah. They have to be like.

It's like nothing worse than being alone. Well, maybe your thoughts are fine. Yeah. An hour and a half, two hours max. I don't want to be alone with my thoughts any longer than, you know, 120 minutes sort of thing. But one thing I noticed uh and i love it and i think they're littered all throughout new zealand as you drive down the state highways

and in the middle of random but nowhere there's just signs quite provocative sort of political signs that's you know like hammered into paddocks on the side of the road that you read. It's like, you know, Mark, Mega, make our dune go away. Oh, those sort of signs. And I'm like, who's paying attention to any of these signs?

Well, maybe she did. Maybe she saw that. Oh, okay. I didn't know anyone wanted that. Oh, okay. Thanks, random sign on State Highway 1. I'll take that. But there's also, like, you know, anti-abortion,

a life in the womb is a life unborn. Children are still part of the family. And I'm like, this sign's sitting on the side of a paddock in the middle of nowhere. I'm hooning past 130, 140 k's an hour. No, you're not. 100 k's. 100 k's.

None of it I mean as I'm heading To Tee Cofodder I'm like What's my stance On abortion Who's driving Yeah I know

But Would you rather that Or would you rather People like Camped outside parliament For three or four days In tinfoil hats At least that was fun

Was it It kind of got a little Yeah Yeah I tell you In some of the areas You're like Damn tinfoil sales

Must be through the roof In this little region For their hats That they wander around in But my pitch is Does anyone have a paddock On the side of a state highway? If we come down

Bang up a few posts Will you put up a Oh Jono and Ben one Just in the middle of nowhere Yeah Just Jono and Ben Another radio show Or something like that. Yeah, okay.

Okay, text 4487. Do you have some land next to a busy street? It doesn't even need to be busy. The less busy, the better. Well, we'd like a few cars going past. It's affordable slash pointless marketing. All right. We'll get out there with the anti-abortions, the political stance ones,

the vax ones, Ben. Then all of a sudden, someone will be driving past, 150, 160 k's an hour. What was that, a John O'Benn? Plug in John O'Benn Radio Show. Maybe I will.