Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: We Called Back A Scammer!

Episode Date: January 27, 2022

We reckon we have been scammed via WhatsApp, so we decided to call back our scammers. Risky business, we were playing with fire! We also found out that Jono got involved in an Anti Vaxxer protest... But it may not be how you think. Finally, we spoke to someone in Hawkes Bay who knows every single place Benedict Cumberbatch visited when he was in NZ during lockdown in 2020. He knew just as much as the contact tracer app does! Enjoy the podcast.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, brought to you by Rosene, New Zealand's most trusted paint. Kiwi made since 1946. The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome to the podcast today, the 28th of January, heading into weekend. That's what happens on Fridays? Yeah, it's normally how it works. It's a long weekend for Auckland, but this is where our situation happens, right? Where we don't get that holiday, even though we're based in Auckland, because it's not a national holiday. No, never celebrated the anniversary of Auckland. Well, it's a shame, because you love, you know, you're passionate about your city. It's my city.

It's the greatest city in New Zealand. We all know it. Some people don't like to admit it. But you know what they say about haters, Ben? They're jealous. And you know what jealousy is? It's people wanting to be you. And, you know, the likes of, yeah, the Gores, the Ash Burtons,

we all know they just want to be Auckland. Maybe not last year when we were in lockdown. To be honest, no one wants to be Auckland. I feel like you've just taken it a bit easier on Auckland. I haven't heard the word Jaffa or anything lately. No, you're right. Everyone's like, oh, I feel a little bit to be Auckland. I feel like you've just taken it a bit easier on Auckland. Yeah. If anything. I haven't heard the word Jaffa or anything lately. No, you're right. Everyone's like, oh, I feel a little bit sorry for Auckland. Yeah, no, we'll back off.

We'll back off. It was probably like, because Auckland was like, oh, we're punching up. But Auckland, you know, the big city. But now you're like, oh, it's, you know. Auckland was like a celebrity that rose through the ranks really quickly, was at the top of its game, and it was at the top of its game just a bit too long that people started hating on it. Yeah.

And now it's lost all the gigs, it's not getting any more feature films. It's fallen right away and you feel a bit sorry for it. It's still there. And I make jokes about it. It's like when they played the Britney Spears footage of all the comedians making jokes about her over the last 20 years.

You feel like, oh. Yeah. Yeah, and I hope that's how you all feel. About Auckland. What I love about these podcast intros is we come up with no plan. You clearly don't know what we're going to talk about. Ben, you have no idea. No, no.

You and me just turn the mic on and surprise me with that. What's your favourite brand of battery? That's what I'm going to chuck at you. I'm looking at two batteries here. I've never seen seven up. Premium heavy-duty battery. I'm going to chuck at you. I'm looking at two batteries here. I've never seen 7UP. Premium heavy-duty battery. I've never seen a 7UP. I feel like there's a...

More of an ever-ready energizer sort of battery purchaser. I feel like there's a lemonade brand that may have problems with that name. But it's not the number 7. It's like written 7. It looks like it's come from South America as well. To be honest, I find because you know your big banger ones, but then there's always

the cheaper option at the supermarket. Here we go. This is cheap. Let's give these guys a crack. Maybe they'll look that way. Maybe I don't know about them and they're saving me money, but maybe they'll last as long and you never compare them. You never go oh, that one lasted me nine days in the

remote. Do the unknown brands, the seven ups of the battery game, the battery market do they last as long have you found? I don't know. I haven't compared them to other I'll buy it. I'll buy the ones that you know. A twelve pack of the cheaper options if I need to do that. But I haven't compared

them to the actual you know the Everettys or the what's it? The Duracells. Energizers, yeah. And there's the other thing. We were actually just talking about this off air before. What's gone what's got out of control? I would say batteries have got out of control. So many

batteries. Too many batteries, yeah. Square 9V the Double A's, the Triple A's, the Double D's. Yeah, the batteries might be something else. There are D-sized batteries though, aren't there A's, you know, the double D's. Yeah. Batteries. Might be something else. There are D-sized batteries, though, aren't there? I think, yeah, you're right.

And what fits into what, and why can't they just... Then you get the tiny little ones for, like, hearing aids and stuff. So many batteries. A lot of batteries. And what the hell, what the fuck's in batteries that makes them work? Oh, that's true. What is inside here? I don't want to find out. No. Maybe you can bite them to just get a little bit more life out of them. Yeah, that was always the way, inside here? I don't want to find out. No.

Maybe you can bite them to just get a little bit more life out of them. Yeah, that was always the way, yeah. You could get a bit more life out of them. Back in the day, you'd bite them.

You're like, I don't know if that's recommended. You wouldn't bite a battery, would you? No, I wouldn't bite a battery. Maybe you could lick them. Maybe you'd lick the end of the batteries.

There was always some mad dog like you at school doing that. Lick the battery. So anyway, that's Battery Chat. We've talked about Auckland and now you can enjoy the podcast. Have a great weekend.

We really do appreciate you guys listening to the podcast. The Hits. Breakfast with Jono and Ben. Now, yesterday I saw Producer Juliet, and again this morning, your car in the work garage, Juliet. That's a cute little VW. It's a VW Polo. Polo, yes, VW Polo.

This is a hand-me-down car. It is. Your parents see your sister, and then your sister to you. To my brother, and then to me. Oh, your brother got in there, right? Yeah. Yes, you're fourth in line. Yeah.

And it looks like- The royal family, you're like fourth in line for the car. Yeah. You're the Prince Harry of this car, are you? Gosh, yeah. Yeah. Is Harry fourth? Where's he sitting in line?

I think he's like seventh or something. Oh, is he even in there now? No, probably not. I mean, Cain, you're Prince Andrew. Don't say that. What a comparison. Don't say that. But, you know, this car, it looks like it's been driven every day through the Gaza Strip.

It's just got dents all over it. I think there's a couple of bullet holes in the passenger door. It's had a hard life, hasn't it? It has had a hard life. But then yesterday, a first for me as I've witnessed producer Juliet's car. Completely covered in leaves.

You know, all over the roof, all over the bonnet. It was almost like the car was trying to disguise itself in camouflage. Yeah. So you've obviously driven it

and then parked it with still the leaves on. That's why I couldn't get my head around it. How slow are you driving? The leaves aren't blowing off. I wondered that too, actually. I didn't even notice the leaves on. That's why I couldn't get my head around it. How slow are you driving? The leaves aren't blowing off. I wondered that too, actually. I didn't even notice the leaves until you'd said something.

What? There's leaves all over your car. So at home, especially my flat, obviously I have to park on the road. And so yesterday I was parked obviously under a tree. But it was raining the night before, so it meant the leaves were kind of stuck to the car. And so when I drove to work, and it was still raining when I drove to work, so it kind of stuck the leaves there. And then yesterday when I left work, as soon as I sort of even drove 10 kilometres an hour,

they just all flew off. Oh, they came off. Yeah, good. I thought that was your new paint job. I had to cover up the dents. Yeah. What I have appreciated, speaking of cars, is driving. I mean, it's been a longstanding message you're trying to get out there, Ben,

that I am New Zealand's worst driver. Yeah. Most impatient. Just, you know, you don't like stopping, staying still for a second. The red lights, whatever, you won't stop. Very erratic, unpredictable. Yeah. Not good traits on the road.

But I have found a more aggressive driver, a more impatient driver out there on those roads. It is the 29-year- old tradie in a Ford Ranger oh really? have you seen a 29 year old in a Ford Ranger? I love them, they're the same sort of motorist as myself

they're riding up your bottom I literally saw one without a word of a lie drive directly over a roundabout. What, through the middle? Through the middle of the roundabout. The road was quiet, granted, and I would have done the same thing if I could, if I had the power. And so I got into a bit of a hole of what your car says about you.

All right. Because it was confusing me. Like, they were driving more faster and more furious-er than Vin Diesel. Yeah. These drivers in the Ford Ranger. I don't know what these tradies are rushing to. It's not like, you know, there's a supply shortage. That's right.

If anything, take your time. So I got into a hole of, you know, what your car says about you. If you have a car that's just full of stuff, you know, some people just have a car that's full of stuff. It's even pouring out the windows. That apparently says that you're a multitasker.

Or potentially you've just been kicked out of home. I don't know. Yeah, I wouldn't say that was multiple, but okay. Alright. I'd say very disorganised. If I see a car with, you know, another one here, if you own a red sports car, which means you're willing to take financial risks And you've really taken your midlife crisis to the next level

Following on You're the life of the party if you display a decal sticker You know how people have stickers on? Wish my partner was as dirty as this You know, stuff like that Apparently you're the life of the party Yeah, that's true Exotic car fresheners.

Do you have a car freshener? I do. I do. I've got one of LeBron James and another one of The Rock, Dwayne Johnson. Well, that means, my friend, that you're a passionate lovemaker. That is true. Passionate lovemaker where you love the smell of an artificial pine forest. And that's what your car says about you.

Oh, no, can I finish this one? Because this is bed boys. SUV drivers. You've got an SUV. Pedantic and overly concerned about safety. That is me. Hey, next on the show, Christopher Luxon. Is he the preferred prime minister?

We'll tell you next. It is the hits. See you, Sharon. Please welcome the only thing. It is the hits. Ed Sheeran. Scrolling through your feed. Please welcome the only thing more awkward in the news than the banter at the end of the sports section. It's Ben Boyce and Jono Pryor with Scrolling Through Your Feed. Now, the National Party, they're clawing back support. They're biting off chunks, it seems to be, mainly from ACT, a little bit from Labour.

There's a new poll that was on One News last night. Support for Labour had gone down only 1% to 40%. National went up to 32%, though, and ACT down 3% to 11%. Oh, Seymour's probably like, well, it was fun while it lasted. So they're saying National's been eating into ACT's support. I suppose that's all both right-leaning parties, aren't they? Yeah, exactly. And then when preferred Prime minister comes into question,

Christopher Luxon has jumped up 13 points to 17%, and Jacinda Ardern down four points to 35%, and Seymour down five, down to only 6%. So, yeah, I guess, again, they've cut into a little bit of axe, you know, a little popularity, but then taking a little bit of a chunk out of Jacinda. Yeah, Deluxe clawing his way up the little bit of a chunk out of Jacinda. Yeah, Deluxe,

clawing his way up the polls. Trying to get that nickname out there. Deluxe, oh yeah. Did you like Deluxe? Yeah, yeah, still not bad.

Lux Deluxe was the other one. Yeah, didn't you try pitching stuff? The Luxinator? Yeah, the Luxinator. Yeah, I tried pitching these to him.

Lux Luther. Who answers these polls? Yeah. I've never once been asked to participate in a poll. Well, that's the thing. So if you look at preferred Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern's 35%. But second, if you look at the options, is, don't know, 28%.

Oh, really? No, no. And that's probably someone you call someone up, and you're like, it's dinner time. You're like, oh, no, no, no. Oh, no. So that 28% don't know, whoever don't know is, is really doing quite well as preferred Prime Minister. It would be good branding to change your name to don't know, whoever don't know is, is really doing quite well as preferred prime minister.

It would be good branding to change your name to don't know. The don't know party. Nothing would make me more insecure as a person than having a three-monthly poll that comes out that tells me, and which percentage of an entire country hates me? I know, you're like, I've gone down over the last six months. It's very scary. And just quickly, Super Rugby's starting up soon.

Hopefully we get some crowds, but who knows. And Roger Tuabasachek used to play for the Warriors. He was a Warriors captain. He's playing for the Blues. I thought they did a real good thing yesterday

at a press conference. He had three words that he had to insert. He got given a little sheet they were doing this before the press conference. Into the press conference, have a listen to how he went.

You hear a ding every time he gets the word. Discombobulating, hippopotamus, stickless cage. I've got to find a way to squeeze these three words into today's press. One of the biggest difference, and sort of still discombobulating to me, is probably another challenge is there's, with League and Union, there's a lot of different bodies. You know, there's a few little cheetahs out there and a few hippopotamuses out there.

There's a player like Harry Plummer who, you know, he's got that Nicholas Cage feel about him. He's nice and calm, so I'm able to go in. He did really well, didn't he? He's got that Nicholas Cage feel. Everyone will be in the press conference and be like, yeah, that's an odd metaphor. What does that mean?

Nicholas, what, slightly unhinged? Blows his money on extravagant purchases? It was quite a big movie star for a while. Yeah, so I thought it was quite a cool thing they were doing. I always feel very sorry for the rugby because it starts, it feels, we say this every year, it feels like it starts earlier and earlier. But I always feel sorry for the ground would be harder and harder.

Oh, it'd be rough. Imagine playing rugby at this time. Yeah. Like playing on cement. Yeah, that's true. That's the only thing I think about.

I haven't even thought about that before. They probably have a sprinkler system but in Auckland they're probably not allowed to use it with the water shortage. And that is scrolling

to your feed this morning. Next on the show in three minutes time Jono thinks he's found the number one cause of all relationship arguments. And you might be right. Yeah, I did a poll last night and 58% said they don't know if it is, but I'm going to roll with it.

We'll have that next. It is the Hits, Jono and Ben. Ben and Jono call this show Jono and Ben. Breakfast on the Hits. The Hits. Now yesterday on the show we were talking about things as a couple that, you know, sometimes can end in arguments. So some of the things you do that lead to frustration. We've got some great calls on 0800THEHITS.

For me, it's pretty much every time me and the missus try and build a flat pack. Like, hey, what? Lots of times in the evening my husband says, let's watch a movie, shall we? Ah, sure. And then we sit down and go through Netflix together, and we can't find one. And I just get so frustrated, and I just walk out of the room. So it's when myself and my husband might be having a casual debate about something, and then he tells me to calm down.

Yeah, those are beauties. Even the flat pack one, I think that's something everyone can relate to, and you almost end up not only trying to sort out the flat pack, but then packing up all your belongings and moving out of the house. Pack up the flat and leave. But after the show, we were still talking about this, and I thought I've found another one, which I think might be the ultimate. The ultimate relationship tester.

Car parking. Okay, so one of you's driving. Yes. And the other one's in the passenger seat you pull into pack and safe oh there's one you decide as the driver no that's too they made the call too late i don't have to stop reverse back i'd hold up traffic you know oh there's another one over there yeah to the point where you sort of end up in a full-blown argument going, how do you think I park when you're not in the car?

Do you think I just drive around the car park going, oh, missed it, no, oh. Do you think I spend all day just driving forward, not being able to park anywhere? And then you shop in silence. Are you one of those people that likes to park as close to the front as possible or do you not mind? For me, I'm like, I don't mind.

I'll just park, kilometers away that's why you park as far away as you can from a location and that frustrates my wife as well because she's like i'm like just going over there because i know that we parks there everyone's kind of lazy they'll be parking by the door and then she's she's like she's with you i'm like oh it's tight i can't get back in i don't want to be the pressure of people watching me. Many, many times at the car park, I've gone out and let her drive to park her. You're like, well, you do it then. She's like, oh, well, she does a far better job than me. She's like, great, because I don't want to park 10 kilometres away from the doors.

You notice that about Ben. If he ever comes to your house, he'll almost park three streets away. I don't know why. That's true. Yeah, no, that's true. I can imagine that. Is that also because do you go strategically away from other cars where there's spaces next to that if, like, your car doesn't get hit if someone opens their door next to you?

I'm not so worried about the car getting hit. Just worried about people seeing me drive and judge my driving. That's probably the main thing. He came to my house once. I was like, oh, it may have took a while to get here. He's like, yeah yeah I parked in the middle of the desert road just because there was

no one else around to see me so what is your relationship test now we reckon there was a few more that maybe we forgot yesterday

what's the things you do as a couple that really start to wind you up love to hear from you this morning 0800 the hits is our phone number

4487 on the text as well we'll do that after pink on the hits Jono and Ben New Zealand's breakfast. We're just talking about the ultimate relationship testers this morning.

There's nothing quite like putting your relationship under an unnecessary strain with an activity that you both know going into it is going to end in an argument. You know? A lot of times you're like, well, I know that in half an hour I know what we're going to be doing. Well, we do it anyway. Nancy's on the phone.

Good morning, Nancy. Hello. Hi. How are you doing? What's your relationship tester, mate? Well, my husband at the time, after our wedding, went through and opened up all our wedding presents without me. Least to say, we didn't talk for weeks afterwards.

Oh, so you got married, happy time, and then he opened all the presents, and you're like, uh-oh. Was it the fact that I imagine, you know, a guy opening presents, just ripping them open, chucking them in storage? Ripping them open, yeah, not being gentle. You've got to pull the tape off slowly and you've got to enjoy the present a little bit before you rip into the box and all that sort of stuff. I'm one of those people that my cell phone, for example,

still has plastic on it. Oh, yeah. So, I mean, you've got your process and you're like, this will be our first activity together as a married couple. We will do this. And he's just gone, but, and I bet the cards weren't attached to the presents, so you didn't know who gave you what.

Yeah, I started to cry, and he couldn't understand why. He was like, what's wrong? What did I do? I can imagine one of those situations, too, where you almost like put those plates, I washed them and put them away. They're in the mix. They're not new anymore. They're not kind of exciting anymore.

Yeah, right. Well, there we go. It's almost ended in divorce the next day after the prison opening. Yeah, that was the beginning of the end. Is it still going? No, no. Who got all the prisons in the end?

I never get gifts from him in a box anymore. Nancy, you have a great day. Thank you. Lukey, good morning. How are you? Good, bro. How are we? Good.

How's Nelson today, mate? Good, man. She's sunny today. Way better than yesterday. Everyone sounds so relaxed in Nelson, don't they? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, we've got a couple of Omicron cases, but we're still chill, man.

It's all good. It's all good. Hey, Lukey, what's the we've got a couple of Omicron cases, but we're still chill, man. It's all good. It's all good. Hey, Lukey, what's the big relationship tester for you, bud? When you're trying to find the TV remote. Oh, everyone always accuses everyone. Even, like, you have to stand up. They're like, it's under you. It's under you.

It's like, no, it's not under me. And you still have to stand up to prove you're not sitting on it. Got to rip, like, all the couch cushions off the entire thing, and then you still can't find it. And then everyone gets ripped. You generally know if there's a remote in between your cheeks, don't you? Well, that's what I think as well. And then there's always the game of who had it last.

Oh, you had it last because you were watching the thing. You didn't put it back. No, I didn't have it last. My thing with the remote, and it's not actually a tester in our relationship, but more with my children, Luke, is I just spend my time as a grumpy boomer just going, turn it down. It's too loud.

Turn it down all day. That's all I say. And I also say, no, you can't have Robux. I know what Robux are, but no, they can't have them. No, yeah. Hey, Luke, you're going to have a great weekend, mate. Yeah, well, you too, fellas. Appreciate all your calls and texts.

The New Zealand's Breakfast are next. I'll tell you, I reckon it's the best movie I've seen in many, many years, and you can watch it right now. I'll tell you what it is in three minutes' time on the hits. Jono and Ben, the hits. Jono and Ben on a Friday morning, and I'll be banging on to you guys about this movie I watched the other night, and I thought I'd bang on to the people listening right now on the radio.

Mate, this is what radio is. It's just us banging on every morning. You're allowed to bang on. It's your job, mate. But it was really fascinating. Mate, this is what radio is. It's just us banging on every morning. You're allowed to bang on. It's your job, mate. But it was really fascinating. Now, you remember this story. So it's a documentary made, it's called The Rescue. It's on Disney Plus right now. And it's about the story that captured

the world's imagination. You remember a few years ago where a Thai football team, there was 12 boys and their coach, they got stuck in a cave in Thailand. Breaking news right now out of Thailand. Rescue teams are working through the night to save 12 boys and their coach trapped inside a cave in Thailand. Breaking news right now out of Thailand. Rescue teams are working through the night to save 12 boys and their coach trapped inside a cave. The monsoon had come early.

The conditions in the cave were impossible. There was a very strong feeling that the children couldn't be still alive. Wow. Isn't it crazy how you sort of vaguely remember these events and then move on with your life? Yeah. Remember last year, we were all about the bloody Taliban going into Africa. Oh, Taliban, Taliban is all I could think about for a week.

This is like one of those stories. Yeah, you'd have to be living in a cave not to remember that story. Ironically, those poor people were. Now, from what I remember, they were almost there for three weeks. Three weeks. It was close for three weeks. Three weeks. It was quite close to three weeks. That's how long they were living in this cave. And they were all sort of like 12 years old.

Yeah, 12 years old and their football coach. So, yeah. So, they had the Thai Navy SEALs there. But it was these middle-aged sort of dudes from England who, like, went cave diving in their weekends that they kind of got over to help them out. So, these are guys that they were kind of the experts the best in the field because it's not something that everyone does lots of people go diving but not many people go diving through caves and through narrow spaces and it seems like a real wild call isn't it all the navy seals can't do it let's get those middle

age dudes those fun looking middle-aged dudes yeah they see when they showed up everyone's like oh these are the guys that are gonna be doing that and they get it they've kind of made themselves have you just gone down to the pub and gone who's keen yeah and what i the thing i didn't realize is the caves were kilometers long they were so huge so it took nine days for them to find them basically they were in caves for nine days well yeah they're basically swimming a bit now they think they couldn't get any further and then come back another time and so it took nine days to eventually try and get further enough to find them. And by that stage, they're like, well, never.

There's never going to be anyone living that far into the cave. Although they did find four other people at one stage. Who were alive as well. Yeah, there's four guys who were alive. Yeah, quite early on, they're like, oh, these guys have been trapped as well by the monsoon. What are you doing here? And they got them out.

Basically, it was only 30 seconds. They had to take them under the water and sort of share their breathing apparatuses with them. And these adults panicked. And they're like, well, these kids are never going to come. So they ended up having to sedate the kids, getting permission to sedate the kids to bring them back 11 hours per kid.

11 hours. How many children were in there? There was basically, I think, about a dozen kids. 11 hours of swimming how many children were in there there was basically I think about a dozen kids yeah 11 hours and the kids were obviously just sedated

sedated with like a respirator it was dead weights they were carrying with them yeah like coming along as well and if the respirator

came out of their mouth they would drown as well because obviously they were oh my god it was an incredible incredible story I mean the little

the little thing I was a bit disappointed was they didn't follow up how the football season went afterwards. They didn't know how the team went. They were two for one, weren't they? Yeah, so we never know. But then they also had to wear glasses for like three weeks, the kids, like dark glasses, after coming out of the caves

to adjust back to the light because they'd been down there so long, which you imagine as well. Maybe that's what happened to Bono. He just had to do that for the last 30 years. That's incredible. That's an amazing story. Those other four people didn't get any lip service, did they? They got rescued.

They were like, hey, we were in there as well. Oh, but you'll focus on these kids. Yeah, so it's called the Rescue Kitchen on Disney+. So the dive is incredible. A little bit too big for their boots, though. I like them better when they're underground. But again, they're like, oh, look at that. No, I'm kidding.

It's really cool. We can check it out right now on Disney+. Hey, next, we've got to tell you, who's taking over from Adele? Yeah, in Vegas for her residency that she cancelled slash postponed. More details next. Spy. No WhatsApp. Spy.co.nz.

And now to producer Juliette, who is coming in hot. I don't actually know what her body temperature is at the moment. She just looks kind of sweaty and Omicron-y. Do you know that? I don't have Omicron. Do you know? Have you taken a rat this morning? No. You know, he said coming in hot.

Have you heard that TikTok? Someone's like, I'm coming in hot, coming in hot. Are you? No? No, I've heard, I'm an island boy. Have you heard island boy? No, I haven't. Oh my God, my son, he's just got that on loop in his head. Once he's one, I'm an island boy. Have you heard Island Boy? No, I haven't. Oh, my God, my son, he's just got that on loop in his head. Once he's one, he'll get stuck in your head.

And then once he starts singing it, I'm like, and a gang, gang, swang. Anyway, if I'm talking about a song no one knows. That's okay. So, obviously, Adele is not doing her shows in Vegas, and the person that is replacing those spots is Keith Urban. So he was supposed to do a cassette. We wanted you the whole time, Keith. You were first on the list.

What am I just... No, no, no. Don't mind that behind you on the stage it says Adele. You just keep doing your thing. So he was supposed to do a series of shows in May after Adele had finished her residency, but they've brought some of them forward to fill Adele's spots. So unfortunately for the... He couldn't make the ones that she had cancelled the day before.

We were talking about it. It's such a big call for her reputation with fans, many of which she would have disappointed, and let alone the casino, who would have poured millions and millions of dollars into it. And it's essentially just been cancelled, hasn't it? I mean, they might pick it up in 2023 2023 but who knows what's happening in the world and i loved that uh i was reading an article on the daily mail and it was like adele you know left las vegas in tears and hopped on a private jet and flew back to los angeles and uh she's like she was seen ushering back there's like this blurry image this photo it's almost like the the Loch Ness Monster or something

going into, she was seen returning to her boyfriend's $14 million Los Angeles mansion. I'm like, why does it matter? If it's $14 million. And should we be surprised? His name is Rich Paul. I'd be disappointed if he wasn't living. If a guy named Rich isn't living in a $14 million

mansion, he's not doing things right. That's very true. And Macaulay Culkin is engaged to Brenda Song. She was kind of a Disney star, you could say, back in the day. She was in Suite Life of Zack and Cody, I think. That was one of my favorite TV shows. So they've been together since 2017. They do have a son together as well. He's almost one.

Macaulay, remember, he dated Mila Kunis for like a decade. That's right, yeah. And then Brenda did used to date Miley Cyrus' older brother as well. Oh, bloody. Didn't we talk to him? No, that's a different brother. She dated the one that was literally basically head to toe covered in tattoos. Oh, yeah.

Brazen. Brazen, yeah. Brazen Cyrus, yeah. He was great. He was awesome. He's good. I do like Brazen because he's the only person who's made worse tattoo decisions than me. He's gone face.

Once you're on the face, there's no coming back, is there? Yeah, exactly. And that is your Spy Update for this morning or for this hour. For more, you can head to thehits.co.nz. Thank you very much, Producer Juliet. Coming up in 10 minutes' time, we're going to speak to a lady whose parents want to arrange her marriage. It is The Hits.

You've got Jono and Ben. The Hits with Jono and Ben. Now we want to know on 0800 The Hits what would surprise us about your relationship status? Because there was a Kiwi couple from the Waikato that spoke to Brad and Laura who do the new drive show here on The Hits.

They're doing a wonderful job Brad and Laura. I mean their chemistry just in four days is better than ours in ten years, Ben. What are we doing wrong? Well, the love's out of our relationship. Remember when it was new between you and I? Yeah, now we're just full missionary, aren't we? Oh, God! Now, the Wicca's a couple, Steph and Daniel, and now

they had planned to have their wedding a couple times over the last year or so, but obviously there's been lockdowns. They had to postpone twice, and so they were meant to be getting married in April, and then old auntie Cindy comes along with her a Sunday all going to have a press conference and they're like uh-oh what's this going to be and so obviously New Zealand's going to move to basically the red everything's going to kind of go into some sort of form of lockdown so they decided on the day that they were going to plan their wedding and

have it on the actual day we had a conversation in our family chat, and I just said, like, screw it, let's get married. I messaged a celebrant, messaged a photographer, and they were happy to drop what they were doing. And I was like, cool, we've got the two main people we need. And from there, it was just a whole lot of phone calls, and let's just do this. How many hours did it take you from woe to go

to get this wedding off the ground? At 11.30, I initially first sent a message. And what time was the wedding? Initially, it was 6 p.m., and we were like, okay, this isn't going to work, so we pushed it out till 7 p.m. And then everyone's home by 11.59? Yeah. Wow, nothing like getting married in an absolute mad panic.

Six hours. That is the Lewis Hamilton of weddings. That's at lightning pace. And look, there's, I've been looking at some photos because there was an article online. It looks amazing. Like, it looks like, you know, like it's a wedding. Wow, that's incredible. I expected, you know, like someone would be wearing a paper bag or something, or, you know, like

Wow. Or a rubber sack. Or a paper bag. They've got clothes. Yeah, true. Not living in a closet. But, you bag. They've got clothes. Yeah, true. They're not living out of clothes. But, you know, it looks like an actual, like an amazing, amazing wedding. And they're not in paper bags. That's the most remarkable thing. You're putting something together like that.

Do you think, I would be concerned that, you know, the universe was trying to tell me something. That the pandemic had postponed our wedding three times. I would have been like, well, hey, maybe this isn't for us. I would have pulled. They're a better couple than I am, but that's incredible. So what we want to open up is what would surprise us about your relationship status?

The text number 4487 0800, that's the telephone number. Your grandparents had an interesting fact, didn't they? Yeah, they had the same birthdays. So that was, I've talked about this before, but it was like an Ocean's Eleven heist on their birthdays because they'd go around all the places that give you free dining on your birthday. Genius.

Oh, and they'd have a great day. They had it all mapped out every year. Breakfast here, lunch here, dinner there. And they'd be like, every year, they'd be like, here come these two. Yeah. Back again. Have them quivering, have Valentine's quivering in their boots. Poor old Valentine's is like, oh, mate, we've got no chance now either.

Being a buff, eh? Yeah, true. So on the scale, because I know you like to have sort of wholesome content on the show, Ben, but on the scale of, you know, a wholesome seven sharp story when it comes to relationships, or, you know, a Jeremy Kyle prove to me you're not having an affair with your sister, where would you like these calls sitting? Well, I'm always more down towards the seven sharp end. You're always towards the Jeremy McColl.

So maybe, you know, can we settle in the middle of maybe like an Oprah, Megan Harry sort of, you know. Yeah. What would surprise us about your relationship status or your relationship? We'd love to hear from you this morning. Jono and Ben, mornings from six on the hits and streaming live on iHeartRadio. We want to know on 0800THEHITS, that's our phone number, what would surprise us about your relationship status? We just heard from a Kiwi couple in the Waikato that got married,

basically turned their wedding around in six hours. Yeah, that's quicker than a Britney in Las Vegas situation. That's a hell of a turnaround. So you maybe, you were dating one brother, you left that brother for another brother, and then married that brother, and then left him for the mother. Who knows? It's just hypothetical situations that I'm trying to set up here.

We've got Anna from Taranaki. Morena, Anna, how are you? Morena, I'm great in the beautiful sunny neckie. Oh, love the neckie. Don't get there enough. It's a beautiful part of New Zealand, isn't it? Yeah, Devon Street. Sorry?

Devon Street. Well, not quite. I'm on St. Albans Street. Oh, St.'t it? Yeah, Devon Street. Sorry? Devon Street. Well, not quite. I'm on St. Albans Street. Oh, St. Albans. Yeah, that's another great street. A bit of local knowledge there for me. I'd hate to know what's on Devon Street that you know about, but anyway, we'll talk about that later.

Have you been to 362? Yeah, quite the place. Anyway, Anna, what would surprise us about your relationship status? Okay, so my stepson is married to my brother's stepdaughter. So my stepson is married to my stepniece. So my brother and I have grandchildren in common. The knacky, eh? Oh, but it's not all blood.

Yeah, but it's kind of removed a bit as well. So it's obviously not blood, but it's actual, yeah, through step. That's really fascinating. How did they, did they know each other before the family situation or? No, no. So my husband and I got together and we thought that that actually would be quite a good match. So we're pretty good matchmakers.

Oh, yeah. Oh, right. Kind of teed them up in an arranged marriage situation. I love it. Well, something like that. But they got married before we did. Anna, this is wonderful. This is a very interesting relationship status.

Appreciate your call. You're going to have a great weekend, eh? You too, guys. Actually, speaking of arranged marriages, coinc coincidentally we have someone on the phone right now and she's uh just said that she's going to be on a tv show this weekend about arranged marriages nikki yeah it's um i'm not sure if you're familiar with what an arranged marriage is like a very old like indian sort of way of getting married where you know the families meet and they're like hey we like the boy we like the girl it's because they're married you know not like you know modern they think we're like

you know you date for like a couple of years a month or whatever and then you get married but no so arranged marriage is basically the parents come together like the boy like the girl and then boom like they get married so are you in an arranged marriage no so in today's day and age it's a bit different um you know the families meet and they're like okay let's get the kids talking and etc etc and then you know you get the kids talking and et cetera, et cetera. And then, you know, you get to go off and, like, date for however long you want. What if you find someone that you like, but your family hasn't found this person?

How do you attack that? So you're saying if I find someone, bring him home? Yeah, you find someone and bring him home. Is that accepted by your family? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So my parents are really, really like they're super chill um and they have a really like a really good approach to hold the whole you know finding someone and being with someone and they're like hey you know try the modern approach but hey also like keep an eye on like the traditional approach towards you know being

in a relationship and getting married and so that you're so they're happy for you to you to look obviously as well and they're also looking at the same time for you as well. Okay. Absolutely. They told me, like, you know, go out, find people, or jump online, and, you know, and I was like, you guys want to find boys for me? That's fine. I'm not going to, you know.

So they're finding boys as well. Do you want us to find some boys for you too, Nikki? Sure. We'll go out hunting as well. I was just looking here online. 93% of married indians uh say theirs was an arranged marriage my parents also had an arranged marriage so which is why i'm not like you know against the whole idea because they've been together for 30 years now and i

look at them and i'm just like wow like you know like couple goals because they've gone through thick and thin um and they've stood by each other through everything so what if you so like in years gone by if your family found you uh a man and you didn't really like him but the family's sort of agreed that you should marry would you have to marry oh no no definitely my parents are like they would introduce us and like hey you go do your thing and you know spend time with them and like figure out if you like him or not if And if you don't like them, then there's no pressure, which is, I think, the best thing about – I think it's also the relationship you have with your parents plays a role. Yeah, right.

So your parents are basically playing Tinder for you. In some ways, yeah. Yeah. Pretty much like a walking Tinder, yeah. Yeah, they're like, hey, we've got you another one. That one didn't work out, eh? We'll just roll out another one. Like, left or right?

I'm like, left. Oh, it sounds like a really, really fascinating show.. Like left or right, I'll be like left. Oh, it sounds like a really, really fascinating show. It's on TV3, I understand, this weekend. Yeah, 4 o'clock on Saturday the 29th. You have a lovely day. Awesome, thank you.

Bye. See you, Nicky, bye. Next on the show, Jono, you went to an anti-vax protest yesterday. This isn't a lie. No, we've got audio proof of you there. It's a controversial stance, but it's about time I went public. We've got audio proof of you there. It's a controversial stance, but it's about time I went

public. I've got some stuff to say. Why was he there? We'll find out in just a few moments. Time now to hand you over to the more affordable Mike Hosking for your news update. Ben Boyce. Well, it happens to movie stars, it happens to singers, it happens to TikTok stars and now it's happened to Delta, the strain of

COVID-19. It's been knocked off its perch as New Zealand's most dominant strain of COVID-19 by Omicron. Had a good run, though. It was kind of like an Ed Sheeran sort of run at the top there, wasn't it? Yeah, so yesterday, 34 new Omicron cases are reported out of 45 nationwide, and the cluster is now at 90. So, yeah, and they reckon it's going to, you they reckon it's going to increase a bit from there. Well, hats off to Delta. It was, you know, a wonderful stint.

Wonderful stint. It's still around. Obviously, it's still around. Yeah, it's just dropping. It's slipping down the charts. But yesterday, an anti-vax protest you were involved in somehow. Well, yes, I don't like to tell you what I get up to in my personal time outside of work hours, but I have my stance.

I've drawn my line in the stand. Oh, geez. And so I attended an anti-vax protest yesterday. What's the real story? Now, the real story is I was just driving past Government House, and there was a bunch of anti-vax protesters, and there was a wonderful, just a cuddly, happy-looking gentleman, and he had one of the big megaphones doing his chants and stuff as well. And that's full credit to the protesters as well,

the Brian Tharmakey supporters and the anti-vaxxers, who are, A, dedicating an incredible amount of time to this cause, standing outside locations and yelling things, but also coming up with charts. New charts, new messages that you're wanting to get out there over the loudspeaker. That takes preparation, that takes time. And so this guy had a big loud hailer outside Government House.

Genocide, rape and genocide okay in New Zealand. Jacinda's got to go. We have a corrupt government. Can you say hello to Can you say hello to Jono Hey Jono How's it going Good thanks mate

Who say you're supporting us here I didn't have the heart To tell him that I was double vexed I've even given him a booster Who gets a shout out it's not the radio it's not like I'm always the one

giving shout outs I've never had a shout out you've got the megaphone there's a whole bunch of security guys that are looking at me going what no one's ever asked

for a shout out from these people sorry I got a shout out I always like the the optimism of those people as well, thinking that, you know, Jacinda's inside. Yeah, she's not, right?

She's not there, but, you know, listening, going, you know, right, you know, right, I do have to go. I do have to go, man, when you jest as hat and hemp trousers, I'm going to leave. So only you would get a shout-out at that anti-vax protest. It was lovely, though, wasn't it? It was so pleasant. Oh, my goodness.

Now, next on the show, I think, are we part of a scam? Wex protest. It was lovely. That was so cool. Oh my goodness. Now next on the show, I think, are we part of a scam? We both have messages to our phones. Yes. Via the WhatsApp. It feels like it's a scam

or I really desperately need to get back to this person. Yeah, and Julia, we're going to get your advice on this next as our resident millennial and technical advisor

to the program. I've got to win. Boomer category, darling. Technical advisor to her two work dads. We'll get to this shortly. the program. I've got to win, boomer category, darling. Technical advisor to her two work dads. We'll get to this shortly. Well, maybe you've got one of these messages as well,

so stick around. We'll find out if we're all being scammed. We'll do that after Adele. It is the hits. You've got Jono and Ben. Mmm, coffee and breath. Jono and Ben, the hits.

Adele, Keith Urban, we just found out this morning, is going to be taking over her Las Vegas residency because she can't do the shows anymore. So there we go. So all the Adele fans can go to Keith Urban? Can you transfer your tickets over to Keith Urban? Otherwise Adele's going to come back and do it later,

so maybe those tickets are still valid. Now I feel like we're a victim of a bit of a scam, a WhatsApp scam. WhatsApp scam, yeah. Yeah. WhatsApp, it's really deceiving. It sort of tricks me into thinking that I have more friends than I actually do. WhatsApp, don't you find that?

Yeah. Oh, here's another new message from someone in need. They're always in need, always needing a bit of help. They're in trouble. We've both got messages. So we'll bring you in, Producer Juliet. Yes, hello. Now, we're having a moment, aren't we?

We're having got messages. So we'll bring you in, Producer Juliet. Yes, hello. Now, we're having a moment, aren't we? We're having a moment. So we've got these messages that come through to us individually on WhatsApp. Yes. And so now we thought maybe we should try and call them back. Okay. Now, is this one of those moments, you know, when they talk about the boomers putting in their details for a package that they didn't think they had and then putting it in?

They're like, why did you enter in the details? Like, if we call this number back from my WhatsApp, is this going to be like, have they got access to everything? I don't know. I would say no. So I reckon we should do it. Should we do it? I reckon we should do it.

Well, if my bank accounts get wiped out, this is on you, Rafa. Why did you call them from your phone? Is this one of those moments? I don't know. Can I see what the message says? Well, mine says, are you Ying Ying's colleague? I arrive in Queenstown on the 12th of February. I assume you'll be here to pick me up?

Question mark. You've still got time. 12th of February, that's a while away. But, you know, there's inner turmoil going on here. A, I don't want to get scammed being bush. I don't want to be boomer scammed. And B, I don't want this poor lady to be left stranded at the Queenstown airport. And did you get a similar message?

Your mind says, Dr. Kevin, my dog seems to be sick. Can you come and help me see it? And then I'm like, well, I haven't replied to that, but I'm worried now that, you know, if she's reaching out to Dr. Kevin to hopefully help out the dog, I'm worried that the dog, she's like, why is she not getting back to me? The dog's still sick, you know? Yeah, and this is what these people pray on, our kind hearts. Yeah.

I reckon we play with fire a little bit. Oh, that's from my... You go first. No, you go first. I don't want to do it. I don't want to be the idiot. They'll be like, why didn't you do your... And then you're like, I have to get a new phone.

I have to change the credit cards. Because I had access to everything. Surely they can't hack your phone from WhatsApp. Who knows, mate? I don't trust the internet. I think that's something that my dad's always said and now I've found myself saying it. Tell you what I also don't trust, Ben Boyce.

What's that? Skateboarders. But I'll take that. Okay. I'm going to sacrifice my bank accounts for the good of this radio break It's a long number We'll see if Ying Ying's friend needs to be picked up

Are they going to answer? Hello Hello? Hello? It's John O'Barry here, sorry. Are you coming to Queenstown? Is that Ying Ying? I'm Ying Ying's colleague. Do you need to be picked up from the airport at Queenstown?

Thank you for your details. We have the correct information and will be in touch. Oh. Oh. Oh. What just happened? Oh, no. Now they have our voices.

What are they going to do with them? They'll piece our voices together. They'll use them. Just going, hello, hello. Jono. Barry. Barry, yeah. Oh, God. Oh, no.

Actually, if they want to have voices, they can listen to our podcast and get it from there. And a lot of fake laughter as well. Yeah, that's right. Hey, we've got $5,000 up for grabs. That'd be a great way to start your weekend by winning five grand. Five words, 5K next on the hits. John Owen Bean. Five words for 5K on the hits.

You're only five words away from a massive payday. We are back for 2022. We're back with this game once again. The most popular part of our show, five words for $5,000. We give away five grand if we match all five words with your five words. I wouldn't say it was the most popular part of the show,

Ben Boyce. Have you heard the Magnus Benro commercials? Oh, they're very good, Tony. Yeah, they're much loved. Chloe, you're in Nelson. Welcome. Thank you. How are you guys?

You're doing well. You're heading to Hamner Springs for the weekend. Off to rehab, are we? Yeah, yeah. That you. How are you guys? You're doing well. You're heading to Hamner Springs for the weekend. Off to rehab, are we? Yeah, yeah. That's what we call it. Hey, that's got an awesome water park there I see now too. Yeah, oh my God. It's hard out, man.

It's hard out. There's such a New Zealand thing. Shit, that water park's hard out. It's hard out. Hard out. I know, I want to go there. Why is it so hard out? Oh, just when you go down with your partner who's about twice your weight,

the aerodynamics are not great, you know? It's hard out, man. It's hard out, man. I love it. All right, well, who are you going to send to the soundproof booth? Who do you want to try and match up with? Jono, please. All right, this is going to be hard out, Chloe.

All right, Chloe. He is making his way to the corner of the studio. We do have a soundproof booth. He's locked himself in there. All right, what do you say when I say the word Dora? Dora. Explorer. Explorer, yeah.

That's exactly what I was thinking. Anniversary is word number two this morning, Chloe. Anniversary. Day. Anniversary day. Sneeze is word three. Sneeze. Tissue.

Tissue. Oh, yeah, nice. Oh, yeah. Strawberry is word number four. Strawberry. Fruit. Fruit, nice. And foot is the final word this morning.

Foot. Oh, there's some options with that one already in there. I'm going to go shoe. Foot, shoe. Some tough words, I think, this morning there, Chloe. Yeah. Ones that give you multiple options. All right, we'll see how you match up with Jono.

We'll bring him out of the soundproof booth, and hopefully we can send you in the weekend. Send you to Hammer Springs with $5,000. Woo! Jesus, hot. Tell you what, summer months, it's hot in that booth. There's five 60-year-olds in there sweating, wearing nothing but N95 masks.

It's also a nudist speech in there, I forgot to tell you. Tell you what, what a time. All right, Chloe, let's win you $5,000 for the weekend. Oh, yeah. All right. First word I'm going to say, let's go with this one. Dora. The Explorer.

What? One word. Explorer. Yeah. Can we give her that one? Can we give her that? No. Am I out? Am I out? Yeah, you've got to be exact. Explorer yeah can we give her that one can we give her that no am I out

am I out yeah you've got to be exact oh Chloe I am so sorry oh that is savage that's yeah that was brutal

bee humps is that not is Dora the explorer she said you said explorer I'm gathering yeah yeah she said yeah

no but you know how we've got to be specific even if something's plural or not yeah you know Chloe I'm so sorry I specific even if something's plural or not? Yeah. You know? Oh, yeah. I'm so sorry.

I'm the first one. All right. Let's rip through the others, see how you would have gone. Okay. Anniversary. Day. Oh, nice. Sneeze.

Tissue. Oh. Strawberry. Fruit. No. And foot. Shoes. Oh.. Shoes. Ew!

You and shoe! Shoe! You are an S and a the away from $5,000. Oh, Chloe! You guys actually match really, really well. I thought it was some tricky words in there. That was out the gate. Well done.

Except for the. I've let you down. I'm sorry, Chloe. That's okay. It's hard sorry, Chloe. That's okay. It's hard out, man. It's hard out, man. Go and enjoy it. Have a hard out time in Amna Springs this weekend.

Cool. Thanks, team. Thanks for listening. We've got some Spy Entertainment news coming up very shortly. Yeah, which artist has pulled their music from Spotify because of Joe Rogan? Tell your next. It is a hit. You got John.

I'm Ben. Stop the clocks. It's a me. Spy. The what's up. Spy. That is a hit. See you guys. John, I'm Ben. Stop the clocks, it's a me. Spy, the WhatsApp spy.co.nz. All right, Tony, after the pie update. Did I just say pie? You did say pie update. The pie update.

The pie update. We should do some pie gossip updates. Yeah. See Mince and Cheese is having an affair with Potato Top. Oh, you heard that too. It's going around. All right, Julia, what's going on in the supply? So we've actually just had a little bit of breaking news

that someone has crashed into Taylor Swift's New York apartment. That's literally all I know. That's just what Behump's told me, so we'll probably just get some more information on that. Yeah, we'll bring you more of that after 8 o'clock. Yeah. And Ed Sheeran, we have spoken about this before, that he doesn't use a mobile phone,

but he's talked a little bit more about it. So since 2015, he hasn't used one, mainly to protect his mental health. He kind of wants to be more present when he's with people, everything like that. But what he does use, he's now disclosed, he has an email every few days. He will sit down, open his laptop,

and answer 10 emails at a time, and then go back to living his life. He's got my approach to emailing. That's what you do. We used to do that. You used to have your Sunday morning email session. Fire, bang them all out. But I feel like Ed Sheeran is such an important person that every few days, he won't even really have, he won't answer

emails, he won't answer calls, so if someone needs to urgently get in contact with him, they have to wait three days for a response. It's like sending a letter. Yeah, I mean, it's fine to live your admin like that when you have $350 million. That's true. And he probably has, you know, people that probably look through that stuff

and go there and know what's happening in the schedule and probably go, hey, mate, you've got this thing on Wednesday. Otherwise, most of us would miss a lot of events. Yeah, if we all threw our phones away, you're like, jeez, did you know Grandma died? Yeah, that's true. John has to come to work for three weeks. But he's very present.

Yeah. Except at work. And there's been a bit of news at the moment. You've probably seen a few articles about Joe Rogan. He's got his big Joe Rogan Experience podcast that's exclusive to Spotify. And he's quite a controversial character. He is kind of known to spread misinformation. He's kind of like you, Jono.

He just says some stuff. He's bald. Yeah. Says some stuff. Sometimes it's true, sometimes it's not. It's probably fact check. All this medical information. There's been a few medical professionals

coming out and going, because he's got such a big following, going, hey, well, this isn't technically correct what you've said, or this is maybe not, you know, but he'll say it to millions of people. Is he anti-vax? I think he is. His parents have vaxed all his research before. I don't know.

He was like saying if you're healthy, one of his things earlier on, if you're healthy, he wouldn't say get the vax, but if you're not healthy, get the vax. You know, that was kind of his early on. I don't know if he's changed his stance. I feel like he might have. I don't know. I might be getting him confused with someone else, but I think he might have got like one dose or got them and then like didn't want the booster or something like that.

So he might be a bit, yeah, to and fro. But Neil Young, and I had to Google who this man was. I think you were negative 45 when Neil Young was around, Juliet. So Neil Young threatened Spotify, said, it's either Joe Rogan or me. You can't have us both on Spotify. And Spotify has come back and said, sweet, we'll take off your music.

We'll back Rogan. You take it. Oh, you take it. But I'm the guy who sung the song. 60% of his artist income is from Spotify. I was reading as well. So that's what Neil Young was saying. His team has supported him.

They backed him as record company, but they're like, you just lost 60% of your earnings. Wow, yeah. But you know, he might come back to it in the future, but Rene wants to make a stand for what he believes in.

I think, you know, Neil Young, he gave it a good shot, but... They didn't want to be looking at the balance sheets, wouldn't they? Okay, Rogan Young,

who's giving us some more hits at the moment. If it was like Taylor Swift or Billie Eilish, that would be probably a different story, you know, because they hits at the moment? If it was like Taylor Swift or Billie Eilish, that would be probably a different story. Yeah, true. They're a bigger deal.

If it was 1976, this would be a whole other conversation. Yeah. We can't lose Neil Young. Yeah, exactly. And that is your Spy Update this morning. For more, you can head to thehits.co.nz. After 8 o'clock on the show and four minutes time, we want to get to the bottom of this as well,

this noise that's in the office. Yeah, we need your help. It's very mysterious. Yeah, it's going on and it has not stopped. We'll talk about that very shortly on The Hits. Jono and Ben. New Zealand's breakfast. The office where we work at the moment, there aren't many people around under the red light setting,

but there is an annoying noise. Lazy. Get in here. Our productivity is down here at The Hits. We need to get those numbers back in here, Ben. Boys, fill this office out. 150 out there. I want it like a little sweat factory.

Back at them. But there is an annoying noise that's been going on for quite some time out there on the desks, right? A beeping noise. Days. Days. And I know we only sort of – this is it right here. Thank you, Julie. I only hear it momentarily as I'm walking into the studio,

but it is starting to drive me mental, like hearing Dave Dobbin for the 20th time on the IRD phone line. Is it soon to get to you? Oh, yeah. I can imagine working out in the office. I mean, whenever you spend a period of time out there, it's just like, all right, stop. And I don't think anyone knows how to stop it.

It feels like some bad stuff's about to go down. Yeah. Maybe it's Omicron going, I'm about to explode. Maybe that's what the noise is, but we'll try to get to the bottom of it. We wanted to throw out there on 0800 the hits. 4487, what is the world's most annoying noise? Yeah, now sometimes things aren't, they don't start off being annoying, and then by the end they do get a bit wound up.

I know what he's going to say. What? It's going to be about my nostrils. Is he going to go? Yes! It's going to be that. He does. You do the little sniffing breathing.

Yes, that is so true. He has to make a little show of even breathing. He has to make it into a bent. Oh, look at me, I'm breathing. And the way he scrunches his nose too. It's the same. He'll just be typing on his laptop. A little gerbil. A little ger too. It's the same. He'll just be typing on his laptop. Like a little gerbil. A little gerbil.

That is so true. I love it how every time, you know, he's brought this up countless times. Every time he's like, has an issue with me blowing stuff out of my nose, but not once have I ever said anything about what he snorts up his nose. Whatever. Have I ever brought that to the attention of the audience, Judy? No, because I respect him as a colleague and a friend. But every time, oh, you blow too much, how do you know?

All right, so what is the world's most annoying noise? What is the noise? Maybe your partner does it. Maybe you hear it around work. Maybe it's something that, you know, like technology, the fridge. The fridge beeping. It winds me up. Can I chuck one out there?

Smoke alarm batteries. Yes. Oh, yes. Now, I don't know when the smoke alarm industry decided as a whole they were going to program the smoke alarm to tell us the battery was running out at 3.30 in the morning. And just constantly, like until you do change it. And what I find interesting is like it warns you when the batteries run out,

but it keeps beeping for nine months. How has it still got the juice? Oh, I see what you mean. It's saying in January all your batteries run out. In October it's still beeping. You seem fine to me. So is that the most annoying noise? Maybe you've got one better.

We'd love to hear from you this morning on New Zealand's Breakfast. Our number, 0800 THE HITS or 4487. You can give us a text anytime. It is Jono and Ben. Jono and Ben, The Hits. We're looking for the world's most annoying noise. What's the thing that gets you, that winds you up? Yeah.

Washing my hands has become a thing because I'm very, like, I like to wash my hands. But apparently I make a squelching noise and I wash my hands multiple times at home. And it's now starting to get on my wife's nerves how loud I wash my hands. You are New Zealand's most prolific hand washer. I'll give you that. And also, just along those lines, what I do really like is the sound of... Yes, that's the noise that winds up my wife hand sanitizer how can something sound so clean and so filthy at the same time yeah so what is the most annoying noise for you

we'd love your calls right now oh a hundred the hits uh we'll get kelly on from wellington welcome to new zealand's breakfast kel good morning how are you guys i'm doused in hand sanitizer right now it's dripping down my arms what's the most are you guys? I'm doused in hand sanitiser right now. Dripping down my arms. What's the most annoying noise for you? Well, I live in Wellington and I live just above a pedestrian crossing and so all night it drives me crazy but I hear the people hitting the button

and then when the green man goes the little do-do-do noise and I hear it all the time. It's there, it's there. Oh, that would be bringing back PTSD, yeah. It drives me bloody crazy. Why are they just crossing the road at that time of night? Why are they politely pushing the button and abiding by the law?

Just walk over the road. Well, it's probably good that they're doing it, but annoying for you. Thank you so much for your call, appreciate it. Thank you. Weren't you saying Billie Eilish's brother recorded that noise when he was here and she used it in a song? Yeah They used it as like

the quick part in Bad Guy where it goes They used the beat of a pedestrian crossing to like make that Now Geez If New Zealand had known this

earlier we would have been marketing off this for years Totally You know that noise in the Billy Eilish song? New Zealand pedestrian Push it

Come to New Zealand What's she thinking of New Zealand? Push a button Melody you're on Welcome Most annoying noise in the world New Zealand pedestrian. Push it. Come to New Zealand. Come to New Zealand. What's she thinking of New Zealand? Push a button. Melody, you're on. Welcome. Most annoying noise in the world. When you're trying to tune your radio and it's just ever got that slight crackle where it just makes it so annoying, you can't hear the song perfectly clear or whoever's talking.

Oh, yeah. You're just off the frequency. I get that. I was very worried there for a moment. When you're listening to the radio and you have Jono and Ben clearly barreling out of your speakers. Hey, good on you, Melody. Go and have a great weekend, eh? Thank you.

You too. Appreciate that. Someone's texted in 4487, mosquitoes in the middle of the night. Oh, that is so true. They sound like the world's tiniest airplane. Yeah. I think you have to turn on the light, adjust your eyes, and you're trying to find

them. Speaking of mosquitoes, Hannah texted a very specific one here. She said, I'll take you back to the 2010 Football World Cup in South Africa. The Vuvuzelas. Oh, yeah. They sound like

an insect swarm or something. They sound like an insect swarm or something. They sound like an army of mosquitoes. Yeah. Yeah, the Vuvuzela mosquitoes on steroids there, Jude. Can I nominate one? Yeah. When you put your washing on and it's done and it just keeps beeping at you. Oh, my God.

You're like, I'm coming. I know it's done. It's kind of like, hey, hey, I finished my job. Hey, hey, hey, your turn now. And along those lines when you're reversing a car and there's the beep, but it just gets, but it always gets panicky. It's like a person going, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. It gets faster.

It was right to the end there. And you as a nervy driver already, you don't need more of that. I don't need someone doing that. Thank you so much for your calls and texts. Next on the show, speaking of famous people in New Zealand, Benedict Cumberbatch. He was in New Zealand. He was in Hawke's Bay.

And someone has got all the locations that he went to when he was in New Zealand. Now, some of them I'm like, did he really? Well, thank God Benedict Cumberbatch was using his COVID tracer app and scanning in everywhere. That person is Ashley Bloomfield. We will detail every location with that person after this

it is the hits yeah yeah nah yeah nah yeah nah the whole movie yeah nah she'll be right

and at the end of the day Jono and Ben breakfast on the hits it's the big news from the small town town town town now we love it

when a celebrity comes to New Zealand don't we and this celebrity that we want to talk about right now was comes to New Zealand Don't we? And this celebrity that we want to talk about right now Was stuck in New Zealand longer than expected He was filming a movie here called The Power of the Dog Jane Campion, of course New Zealand director Her movie and Benedict Cumberbatch

Is batch, patch You said I said it wrong It's Benedict Cumberbatch Like a batch in the Coromandel He was here for a long time He got stuck in New Zealand for lockdown. He hasn't been back since, though, and this is a message I'd like to get out there for everyone in Aotearoa.

Let's play it a bit chill with celebrities. You know, it's no coincidence Ed Sheeran hasn't returned since we painted a mural of him. You know, we need to play it cool. He's one of the world's biggest actors, and he had some great things to say about New Zealand, particularly his stay in the Hawke's Bay during lockdown. We were so blessed to be there.

Very, very fortunate. We couldn't have landed in a more fortunate situation. We were so lucky. You guys and the people we met and your country, you have one of your national characteristics, one of the greatest of your national characteristics is your welcomeness, your hospitality, your open arm. And we felt so, so privileged to be in your company.

Oh, jeez, doesn't that melt your New Zealand heart? What was he thinking? Marmite. Try Marmite. He's made a fatal mistake there because now we're going to come on way too strong. Cumberbatch is going to give us a wide berth from now. We're going to be like that person that you cross the road when you see that you know. Oh, God, New Zealand's here. Oh God, oh God.

Or you hide in the supermarket, hide in the nappy oil. Anyway, someone who is on the phone right now from the Hawke's Bay Today newspaper, he's the editor, Chris Hyde, who tracked all of Cumberbatch's movements while he was here. Yes, I mean, at the time, I think his big film was kind of Sherlock Holmes. You know, that was what he was studying. So one of our reporters decided to go all Sherlock Holmes on and see if he could figure out where he was staying. And so he looked at, I mean, we had a rumor that it was this place.

So he looked up their website and was like, that bookshelf looks bloody similar and sort of just cross-coded it, you know. That image looks exactly like what he looks like on the Zoom call. I've always said there's a fine line between... World exclusive. There's always a fine line between reporting and stalking. Yeah, yeah.

But he had a great time in Hawke's Bay, a great time in New Zealand. He's just spoken about it on interviews this week, been at it come and match. But you've also done a bit more digging about some of the things he got up to in New Zealand. Now, some may be true, some may not be true. Can you run us through some of these? Yeah, look, as soon as anyone heard he was in Hawke's Bay,

there was a lot of chat about where he was and what he was doing. Oh, the rumours start swirling, don't they? They start swirling, and, you know, it's pretty hard to sort the wheat from the chaff. We've heard things like he was in craggy range, which we believe was true. Watering, yeah. Probably went to craggy range. That seems like a Cumberbatch thing to do.

Yeah, sort of places he would go, you know. But he wasn't keen on selfies selfies so there's no physical evidence but we're happy to believe that one. In terms of the ones that we're a little dubious on but it may have happened. We've heard that he shoplifted some burger rings from the Camberley dairy. Yeah, that would be him.

That's definitely been it. I think he's doing okay for himself. I don't think he needs to shoplift burger rings but anyway, who knows. And there's been persistent rumours about his love for the pork belly at the Pack and Save in Hastings. Was it

meat week? Yeah, yeah, exactly. It must have been at least one meat week when he was here. You also had Craig Thompson saying he had a steak and cheese pie with Benedict Cumberbatch as well, so maybe it may or may not be true. Yeah, sounds very realistic.

Well, I mean, these things, sometimes they can be true. We spoke to, because we heard a story of the wonderful guy who ran the tiny little shop in Taihapi. He had like a secondhand used shop, and he said Adele came in. Out of the blue, Adele came in. He served Adele. He didn't know who Adele was, but when she left, he was told that was Adele. And we all laughed and we mocked.

And then we spoke to him and we're like, well, his timeline stacks up. It very well could have been Adele. Because the tour party was having a break from their show in Auckland. They were driving around. He was talking to some people that were like performers in a show and stuff. And you're like, oh, maybe this did happen. This sounds legit. He said she bought a doolie or a scarf or something, didn't she?

Yeah. So, you know, this pork belly pack and save thing, who knows, Benedict Cumberbatch could have been there. Look, I think it's about as realistic as Prince having a son in Invercargill. Is there a rumor that Prince has got a son in Invercargill? Yeah, yeah. Have a look that up, yeah. Prince the singer. Yeah,ill. Yeah, yeah. Have a look that up, yeah. Prince the singer.

Yeah, Prince the singer, yeah. Invercargill woman, I think she was convinced that he was the dad and was getting paternity tests and everything. Well, there we go. We will look that up. That's going to be the next big news. Has Prince got a love child in Invercargill? Yeah. Thank you very much, Chris Hyde from the Hawke's Bay today.

Really appreciate your time. You're going to have a wonderful day today. Will do, thanks. Really fascinating. Next on the show, I Hyde from the Hawke's Bay today. Really appreciate your time. You're going to have a wonderful day today. Will do. Thanks. Really fascinating. Next on the show, I did something over the holiday break. It was probably one of the most humiliating experiences in my life. And he hosts this.

I'm Ben from Jono and Ben. I'll tell you what it is next. It is the hits. Welcome to Two Half-Hour Sts Do a Half-Assed Job. Official title, Tuno and Ben, New Zealand's Breakfast. Yeah, we each contribute to the radio show with little stories, ditties, quips, Ben boys. And now it's your turn.

And as that song, Dreams, was finishing, we'll give this a go, Ben said, we'll give this a go. I'm not super confident in it. So let's wish him the best of luck. I'm not super confident in it. So let's wish him the best of luck. I'm never super confident in any part of my life, to be honest. No, you're not. To be honest, confidence is not normally my thing. It's probably because, you know, if I was more confident,

maybe this experience I would have been a bit better at. But have you ever tried to do anything next to someone who is a professional at the thing you're both doing? I was doing open heart surgery one time next to an open heart surgeon. You feel the judgment. Yeah. Well, that would be the equivalent

because on New Year's we were staying at a friend's patch and a mate of a mate was there and he is a professional chef. So he's a professional chef and he was like, hey, if everyone wants to contribute to the food, I would really love to cook it though because I really enjoy it. That's what I'd like to do. So if you're okay with that, everyone's like, yeah, I'm okay with that. Yeah, it's like when you go to a party, wants to contribute to the food. I would really love to cook it though because I really enjoy it.

That's what I'd like to do. So if you're okay with that, everyone's like, yeah, I'm okay with that. Yeah, it's like when you go to a party, you're like, hey, if everyone wouldn't mind if I would tell you the time and tell you what's coming up next over the intro of a song. I offered my services.

I said, I love talking. Can I talk to you guys for three hours while you all sit around listening? But no one was as keen on that as everyone was keen on this professional chef cooking. And so all afternoon he was in the kitchen making. He made ciabatta bread from scratch. He was grilling cauliflower.

He was seared tuna. He was slicing this. It was pork belly. He was making some amazing stuff on limited resources in a batch. But he was making amazing stuff. Ciabatta bread from scratch. Oh, yeah. The whole thing was incredible.

People would come in as well, as well go, oh, what are you making now on that Instagram? And they'd take a video and all that. It was incredible. But then I had a moment because we had our kids there and there was kids there during the day

but my kids were the only ones for dinner and they weren't part of the allocated food, even though my kids eat whatever. They weren't part of the adults dinner. So I was like, well, I need to make the kids something for dinner. Well, they don't need ciabatta and seared cauliflower or sliced tuna. No, I understand that.

Chuck some fish fingers in their mouth. That's what I had to do. So I kept waiting. I was like, well, maybe he'll finish and he'll leave the kitchen because my kids, it was just a simple dinner. It was some chicken tenders, some chips, and I was cutting up a little bit of like a tomato and cucumber. That was the dinner. That's the dinner I want.

That's my palate. You're cooking now. Chuck those tenders in 180 for 20 minutes. Yeah, exactly. But I keep thinking I don't really want to cook chicken tenders next to a professional chef while he's, you know, he's searing out like tuna and doing all that sorts of stuff so you're quite nervous in the kitchen got to a point where i've got to do it i'm like hey do you

mind if i cook something it's yeah go for it and then you're like pouring out fish chicken tenders and putting it in the oven with judgment yeah as people would come in to take videos and they're like oh what are you making oh yeah you want to take a video of the chicken tenders? I've got these England chicken tenders. Come in this handy packet, mate. Just cut it open. Not one person took a single video of me doing that. No one took any photos of your chicken tenders. They were cooked to perfection, too. One side of the kitchen was MasterChef, the other side was DisasterChef.

Yeah, so it did not work out as well. Coming up, very shortly, I want to tell you what a kid costs his mum. Now, have you ever given your kids a phone? I mean, as a parent, that's kind of what you do from time to time. You're like, here, have the phone. Oh, it's the best parenting tool, I find. You've got it time to time, all the time. Well, this costs his mum a whole lot of money.

We'll tell you how much very shortly on that. Scrolling through your feed. This man, he lives and he breathes news. I've suggested trying oxygen, but he refuses. Now over to the woozy Ben boys with scrolling through your feed. Now, as parents, you know, from time to time, the phone is, you know, is good to sort of take care of the kids momentarily while you're doing something else, you know.

But a mum in the USA gave her phone to a toddler and she didn't realise that what she'd done is the mum had actually put a whole lot of USA gave her phone to a toddler and she didn't realise that what she'd done is the mum had actually put a whole lot of stuff in her shopping cart as you do you know you put stuff

in your shopping cart but had decided that she didn't want to buy any of the stuff or it wasn't at the time or it wasn't great but all these packages started turning up

a few days later on her porch and she realised that the toddler when playing with the phone had gone and ordered all the things in the shopping cart. What, had entered her credit card details in the three-digit pin, the delivery address, and got the items?

You say all these things, it's like maybe she just blamed it on the toddler and this has made world news. That does not add up. $3,000 worth of stuff kept arriving on the doorstep. Yeah, the toddler apparently ordered. Put in a confirmation email. Well, that's very true. That is an advanced toddler. Yeah, very, very skilled as well.

And we spoke about this yesterday. New Zealand tennis player Michael Venus was talking about Aussie tennis player Nick Kyrgios, who's a really great tennis player, but he's kind of out there, isn't he? He's lively, but does that make him a bad person? Well, according to Michael Venus, yes. He's kind of out there, isn't he? He's lively, but does that make him a bad person? Well, according to Michael Venus, yes. His maturity level is about, it's probably being generous to a 10-year-old to say that it's about at that level.

You know, at the end of the day, he's just an absolute knob. Yeah, that's what he had to say. Well, yesterday, Nick Carrasco asked about that in a press conference. Did he want to respond? Well, here's what he said. As for Michael Venus, I'm not going to destroy him in this media conference room right now. But Zabaios and Granola are great singles players.

They've had great careers. And I respect them a lot more than I respect Michael Venus. But you can tell he wants to get down to Venus' level. But he's trying to take the higher road. But he kind of tried to destroy him at the same time. I'm not going to destroy him. But I could. But I destroyed him take the higher road. But he kind of tried to destroy him at the same time. I'm not going to destroy him. But I could. Yeah, but I destroyed him on the court.

Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. For more podcasts from the Hits Network, check out iHeartRadio.co.nz.