Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: What Happens When A Child Projectile Vomits All Over The Dancefloor Of A Wedding?

Episode Date: August 5, 2021

Kia Ora! Firstly we'd just like to say a big RIP to Bernardino. Thank you for all the memories, most of which we can't remember. To pay respects to Bernardino, we got the tributes flowing in of all your wonderful (or not so wonderful) memories with the fine wine. On today's show we also hunted down our most talented listener; there was one guy who can make cricket and bird noises from his mouth, VERY REALISTIC. Send that off to the animal noise awards! Finally, we chatted about what it's like to have kids at a wedding. And by the title of this podcast, you can probably guess what happened to one listener. Enjoy!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

5th August Thursday Ben, Jono, welcome podcast Welcome along to the podcast Do you know I had an embrace this morning August, Thursday, Ben, Jono, welcome podcast. Welcome along to the podcast. Do you know I had an embrace this morning with Seven Sharp reporter and Radio Hauraki breakfast host, Jeremy Wells. Oh, did you? He smells magnificent. Yeah, yeah.

But I said, oh, geez, you smell incredible this morning. He said, you know what I'm doing? I'm layering. I said, what layering fragrances? He's like, yeah yeah I put three on Three different fragrances On at a time And end up with this musk

Oh So he might have gone Like a you know An old spice A yoop And a brute Oh so he's making His own sort of concoction

Just spraying it all on once And he said It's the new It's the new trend When it comes to Oh I see Yeah I mean he's a trendy fashionable guy. He is a fashionable trendy guy you're right. He always looks good. I imagine

he smells good. I haven't been that close to smell him. I nestled my nostrils straight into his neck and I could all I was getting was full wealth. He always looks sharp like he always looks sharp. He doesn't look like he's let himself go at any stage of his life. When you work for a show called Steve Sharp this guy is perfect for it. He turned up and he was like oh man he's the perfect guy

for sure i was i think it was on a reality show i was trying to think where i read it there was a guy who would put on female well you know cologne and it's 2021 i'm sure anyone can wear but ones that you know would traditionally be bought by a female because he was like well that's obviously what it's been designed to go oh that's a nice smell that was his thought rather than the the colognes that again it sounds a bit like not 2021 because i'm guessing everyone could wear whatever clone they want you're doing a good job of covering yourself yeah can i just say not very 2021 i don't know i don't endorse this i was just saying you would put on a cologne that traditionally was marketed towards females not 2021 though you know

but anyway you know yeah and he put it on to say well that was traditionally because he was in the market for females he would wear it

because he was like well they're going to go oh I like that you know rather than that was his yeah that was his thought I understand but as I said

I'm like I'm not wearing 2021 no mate I'm not going yeah I'm not going there but you ended up going there I ended up going there don't I? I'm not very 2021. No, mate, I'm not going, yeah. I'm not going there. But you ended up going there. I ended up going there.

Now I regret every part of it. Why don't I? Yeah. Yeah, what's your go-to fragrance? What do you do? Oh, this is, it's this one, it's, what is it called? It's quite, it's quite good. I quite like it.

Do you spray it on every day? I usually do, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I do. I've gotten to the habit of doing it every day. It comes in this lovely little gold little thing. It's called One Million, but I don't know. Yeah.

Isn't it? Very fancy looking gold thing. Oh, it's a gold bottle. Yeah, I know. My wife bought it for me one birthday, and it smells really good, and I've just kind of become. You're the One Million guy. I'm the One Million thing.

Yeah. Yeah. Let me smell you now. Let me smell it. Yeah, yeah. I'll come back. Smell it. Smell it.

Is it? Oh, yeah. Is it all it. Smell it. Is it? Oh, yeah. Is it all right? It's not too... That is actually... You know how... When you think of people, you smell them. Yeah.

Sometimes. That's how I smell you. Well, you probably do without knowing it. You probably smell that every day. Like, if I smell that somewhere else, I'd be like, where's Ben? He's here somewhere. I can smell him. That's what my daughter does about my mum.

She's like, Grandma Judy here. I'd be like, over the room. No, I can smell them. That's what my daughter does about my mum. She's like, Grandma Jenny here. I'd be like, I'm in a room. No, I can smell her. I can smell her. It must be someone with the same... She's like a tracker. She could be good at tracking criminals. Oh, Grandma Jenny's here.

I can smell her. Yeah, I know. I'm like, oh. It's funny how you pick up on a smell of someone or something and it reminds you. Yeah. Well, yeah. I'm the smell of desperation,

so my kids will be like, I can smell someone's desperate around here. Dad must be home. But it's interesting. I'll go for a Sauvage. I like Sauvage. Johnny Depp. Oh, yeah. Number 2021. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah, right. So it's a lot of people in the cologne game, eh? A lot of celebrities. They do. And they always slap their face on a watch as well, right. So it's a lot of people in the cologne game, eh? A lot of celebrities. They do. And they always slap their face on a watch as well, celebrities. Yes, you're right. For some reason, these watch manufacturers have so much money to pay celebrities for endorsement. George Clooney, Hemsworth, all seductively posing with watches.

Do you know what? How would the cologne game and the, you know, and the perfume game be going? Because a lot of people would buy cologne if they were travelling or perfume when they were travelling. Airport purchases. Airport purchases. But now people with a pandemic is probably not that many people travelling as much as they do, you know? There would be not as much, I would say. I mean, you could buy it from a wonderful place like the Chemist Warehouse, you know?

But you'd be thinking there wouldn't be as much. Do you know, I'm going to find out the answer for this right now. Are we? Yeah. Are we? We've got quite a lot of stuff to do before this other meeting. Yeah, no, no, we're going through here. Who are we calling?

We're calling the duty-free. Okay. Duty-free, and just see, have cologne sales dropped significantly because of these travellers? Thank you so much for calling DFST Galleria. We apologise that we are unable to attend your call right now. Please kindly leave your name and phone number. We will call you back as soon as possible. Please kindly note that our trading hours are from 11am

to 6pm. Okay, sometimes you don't get the answer you're asking. We won't stop. No, we will stop actually. I'll forget about this immediately. Join the podcast. We've been talking about some of the talented people that are representing their countries in the Olympics. And they're doing a great job over there. But we don't want to forget about the people right here listening right now. Yeah, there's ones that don't get recognized on the world stage. And that's who we want to pay honor to with this. The most talented listeners listening right now.

Yeah, now we really just stipulate listeners Listening right now Yeah now We really just stipulate Listeners listening right now Because it's 7.10 in the morning Yeah You know there might be More talented listeners At 8.10 in the morning

Or people that have Already listened That are very talented That have stopped listening Yeah So this is just Purely specifically Focusing on this moment

In time In the show We're going to award Gold, silver and bronze To the people Right now Yeah great Wonderful crowbar At the Olympics I just thought of that too Was it tenuous Or was it a good time No it was a great crowbar show uh we're gonna award gold silver and bronze to the people uh right now yeah great well

wonderful crowbar at the olympics that too yeah was it ten years or was it a good time it was great crowbar yeah we should have planned it like this i just thought of it but anyway but it was almost like the catalyst for this whole concept it wasn't but we're doing it and making it feel like it was so uh because i was teasing ben yesterday someone had texted into 4487 you can text us anytime on new zealand's breakfast And just sort of a humblebrag, rattling off their talents. And I said, geez, I think we have found the hit's most talented listener.

And I haven't told him what it was, but I have her on the phone. Her name is Ana. Are you there? Sure. Now, this is a certain set of skills, much like Nisam when he was trying to hunt down the... Oh, in Taken movies?

Yeah, this is a certain set of skills that Anna's developed over a number of years. Okay, what can you do, Anna? I love languages and so study lots and lots of them. Lots of languages. How many languages do you know? Well, I'm studying probably about 11 or 12

online. Wow! At the same time, she's learning 12 online. Wow. At the same time, she's learning 12 languages. Jeez. But three of them I already kind of know. I've already studied before. Oh, so you're just doubling down. Do you find it's easier once you know another language to learn new languages?

Yep, definitely, especially with, like, romance languages. Okay, talk to us about romance languages. So romance languages are like, they're all related, like Latin, Greek, Spanish, Italian. Ah, gotcha. Ben was starting to wonder if he had to pay for this call. I was thinking, oh, this is like the Fifty Shades of Grey books my mum reads. Okay, so what are the 11 languages or 12 languages that you know? Spanish, French, Portuguese, Italian, German, Modern Greek, Japanese, Latin, Irish, Hawaiian, and Romanian. Oh, Irish. You just go fiddle-dee-dee.

Is that a stereotype? It's really hard. It's not like any of the others, really. Is that like Gaelic? Yeah. Yeah, right. Now, what I'd love to do is a little passage where we ask you a question and you answer in a different language that you know. How's your day going today, Anna?

Muy bien. Oh, good. What are some of your hobbies? I'm in mononga. Lovely. And what do you think of my friend Ben Boyce? Muy divertido. Yeah, he's been trying to hide that for a while.

Okay. We're going to call you now the 12 language lady. Very impressive, Ana, there. How good was she? So that she's so far currently in place for gold yeah gold

for the most talented listeners listening right now so that's how it works maybe you can burp the national anthem pick things up with your toes

like remote controls and things like that that's a huge talent I always appreciate people who can do that maybe you can put things in your nose and then bring them

out your mouth man who was the first legend that gave that a go and they'll probably that maybe you can put things in your nose and then bring them out your mouth. Man, who was the first legend that gave that a go? And they'll probably like, stick with me, stick with me. I lost a lot of balloons inside my head. But you give us a call right now. Oh, Andrew, the hits are 4487. And we've got some prizes up for grabs.

Our gold, silver, and bronze of most talented listeners listening right now. We'll return next. We're looking for someone pretty special listening. The most talented listeners listening right now. As we said before, the Olympics are going on in Tokyo and there's some talented people representing their countries. We want to know right now. We don't want to forget about the people listening right now and see who's the most talented yeah that's right uh these are the ones that you know scotty stevenson isn't going to give coverage to at night time on tvnz

he's not going to talk about the panel of experts about your skills no but he should be and that's why we want to put them on our radio show this morning and you just brought to the show anna yeah wonderful anna who oh gee an amazing amazing talent of knowing multiple languages. Spanish, French, Portuguese, Italian, German, modern Greek, Japanese, Latin, Irish, Hawaiian and Romanian. Incredible. So she knows 12 languages. I can't even speak the language that I'm meant to speak properly

I don't even think I structured that sentence correctly just proving my point so we want to know what 0800 the hits who is the most talented listener listening right now what talents can you do we've had some other talented people join us on the show previously and they may not be listening right now so they may not be able to win

but how about Jules who can make a car alarm noise with her mouth take but how about Jules, who can make a car alarm noise with her mouth? Take it away then, Jules. I love that so much. Far out, we've had some mileage out of that. Oh, that's so good. Haven't we? And then also, was it Kerry?

Katrina. Katrina, who can recite the alphabet backwards in record time. V-Y-X-W-V-U-T-S-R-Q-P-O-N-M-L-K-J-I-H-E-S-E-R-G-C-B-A. So there you go. We have talented listeners, but are they listening right now? Yeah, well, let's go. This is the difference of this one. We'll kick things off with Sarah in Palmerston North.

Welcome. Hi. You're the most talented listener listening right now. What have you got for us? I have picked up the ability to lip read by watching the TV on mute. Now, this is something we're going to have to take your word for. So you've played this video. But how do you know if you've lip read correctly if the TV's on mute?

No follow-up questions. I mean, I first kind of would test it with, like, Netflix and then kind of rewind it once I was like, wait, is that what they're saying, you know? Okay, so we have

a talented lip reader on the phone. All right, well then you're in the running for a gold medal or bronze. Not silver, not silver, though. Jono's not giving you silver. For, well then you're in the running for a gold medal or bronze. Not silver, not silver though. Jono's not giving you silver. For some reason,

you're either getting first or third. Not worthy of a second place. I can tell you that now. We'll head to Harwood. Logan, you're on New Zealand's Breakfast. Maureen, what's your skill? The most talented listener listening right now. Hey guys, I could make a cricket noise and probably a bird noise.

Okay, we'll bring down the music, Drew. Let's have a listen. Oh, a cricket and a bird noise. Okay, what are you going to do first? Oh, I'll do the cricket first. Okay. Oh, that's very good. Listen, there's no chance of Sarah getting a silver now.

I'll tell you that. and your bird noise Oh yeah Very good I probably can't type the 11 languages, you know No, but it's very good, we're going to send you out a prize But you spoke the language of birds and cicada, or cricket We're going to send you out a prize, that was pretty awesome Thanks so much for being a listener right now with a great talent

You're on the running for gold, probably gold or bronze as well. Not a secret place. Yeah. Be doing them injustice. Kiriwai, you're on from Tokoroa. Welcome. How are you? Hey, Barana.

I'm not too bad. I'm just a little bit nervous. Oh, you're nervous. Okay. Most talented listener listening right now. Take it away. Okay. So I tell my mokos I'm a nanny. He's a rapper from way back. So here we go. Take it away. Okay. So I tell my moko I'm a nanny.

He's a rapper from way back. So here we go. This is on the spot. A rapping grandmother from Tokoroa. Okay, here we go. Okay. Hey, Donal and Ben.

I've made a new friend. My name is Kiriwai. I make a pretty good kai. I'm a rapper from way back. Come on, be fast. Come on, friends. I'm going to win this to the end. Oh, nice.

No, no, you'd be a monster if you said that wasn't good, Ben, right now. Oh, the rapping granny. I love it. That's awesome. We're going to send you out a prize. That's awesome. Awesome. Notorious G-R-A-N. Good on you, Kitty. I appreciate it. So, now, Ben, I know you don't like making decisions,

but it's over to you. Gold, silver, bronze. Well, I overordered on the medals, so everyone's a winner today. Oh, God, I knew he was going to do that. Everyone's a winner on the hats. My Olympics would be so, like, everyone would train,

even the people that bombed out, they'd be like, oh, well, you won. You won. You know, your win is in my heart. Oh, God, he makes me sick I've got five grand to give away very shortly as well as that, big news in the world

of sparkling wine, we'll tell you why it's a devastating blow to New Zealand in a few moments The Hits, with Jono and Ben for breakfast It is The Hits, Jono and Ben and it's a sad day for for drinkers in New Zealand. Hit the music, June.

Following an announcement that Bernardino, one of New Zealand's cheapest sparkling wine brands, is going to be discontinued. It's been confirmed by Lion New Zealand that they're stopping bringing out Bernardino and for many people it was an iconic drink of their youth. Between $10 to $12 aernardino a mid-range alcohol content of nine what 9.5 percent yeah a popular drink you're going to be sorely missed and your hazy memories will live on forever in our hearts now we wanted some people this morning to

reflect uh on some of their memories. I liked Bernardino. It was, you know, I was trying so hard to be fancy. It's like me going to a fancy restaurant. I'm trying my best. Trying my best to blend. Got a fancy name, Bernardino, which sounds like an Italian gigolo or something. They gave it a good honest crack. And, Julia, you didn't even know what it was.

No, I had to ask. I thought it was some really, really fancy wine, to be fair. And this is the reason why it hasn't spanned through the generations. This is why it's being discontinued. There's some great comments and we're going to read some of the comments we've found on the internet, but if you want to make a comment 4487 or give us

a call and I'll under the hits and reflect on some of your memories. Oh, this one, how's this? Wow, I still have a bottle of Bernardino stashed away for our wedding day 35 years ago We're going to plan to drink it on our 40th anniversary And cut the top tier Of our wedding cake which has been in the freezer

Well that's going to taste disgusting 40 years of festering Bernardino Fermenting Yeah, well you can go out now And buy that, but I love it, I just love it That commitment of buying it and keeping it And who gifted them that Bernardino as well? Because they definitely didn't respect their friendship.

I love it. So if you want any comments, good, bad or whatever, we'd love to hear from you this morning as we mourn the loss of Bernardino, the sparkling wine that, oh, but I don't remember too much about it because we drank a lot of Bernardino. It is the Hits. You got Jono and Ben. It is the hits.

Jono and Ben, as we mentioned before, sad news for New Zealand right now. For Kiwi Drinkers, following the announcement yesterday that Bernardino, one of New Zealand's cheapest sparkling wine brands, is going to be discontinued. The Spumante Bernardino. It was New Zealand's first foray into the wine market. It probably was. It's everything you imagined a New Zealand debut wine in a bottle would be.

$10 to $12, it's a good price. Affordable. Sounds fancy. The bottle looks like it's from Italy. Italy. It does. And there's been some great comments all over social media and lots of comments coming through.

So we wanted to read out a couple of those. I love it's got a very sophisticated crest on the bottle as well. A crest that probably doesn't deserve to be on the bottle. But it's there nevertheless. Millennial Max has brought us a couple of bottles in for this in memoriam of

bernardino he said they're very dusty you know so well that's the reason why yeah it's ending i like this comment here that i read online they don't make cheap wine like they used to r.i.p bernardino you always have a messy cheap drunken place in my heart that's what it means to people my two buck chuck r.i.p so someone said someone said said on 4487, rest in peace Bernardino there will be less babies in the world from now on. Oh jeez. I love this one.

The Spumante written up the neck was like a glimpse into the future. We've got Craig who would love to join the service. Craig, your message for Spumante. Well, 26 years ago this month, we basically had Bernardino as our drink for our wine.

Sorry, for our wedding. Oh, for your wedding? Yeah, yeah. And your marriage lasted. Yeah, it was our cheap go-to. Three boxes for the entire party, and yeah, it was fantastic times. Are you going to buy another bottle to reminisce? Oh, definitely.

We can't not now that it's going to be taken off. It's like the traditional Jaffas, tangy fruits, snifters. Yeah, well true. Something to remember our Kiwi tradition. Yeah, touching words, Craig. Touching words. Another text here, 4487. R.I.P. Bernardino. You put the S.P. words. Another text here, 4487. RIP Bernardino.

You put the SPU into spewman tea. And Tracy is joining us this morning. Some words for Bernardino. I'm going to miss it. Many a drunken younger days, but one I fondly remember was I was at a fundraiser for child cancer and after a few cheap nasties, I decided to crush some beer cans with my cleavage.

But I did make $250 for a good cause. What are you doing? I'm making it for the kids. For the kids. I'm crushing these with my chest for those children. My boobs made money so I'm quite happy. We'll send you out a

bottle of Bernardino. Don't try and crush this with them though. I couldn't do the glass because it was too cold. It's a health risk as well. It's a health hazard. Doing it for the kids. God bless New Zealand as well.

That is a hit. See you guys, Jono and Ben. Jono and Ben, just like family. The family members you're ashamed of. Okay, Nicole, welcome from Wellington. How are you? Good morning. Wonderful to have you on, Nicole, on this Wednesday.

How's Wellington this morning? Oh, pretty miserable and a wee shake in the middle of the night. Oh, really? So not much sleep to be had for anyone, really. Oh, wow. Did you get woken up? Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, shit. I've never been in an earthquake, but I imagine it's just terrifying. When you're a Thai parent, you sort of don't care. You just want it to stop so you can go back to sleep. Now, Nicole, you've actually got an interesting conundrum on your hands here. You're about to head off to a family wedding What's the problem? Yes well it's exciting

It's a family wedding in the Bay of Islands And we've all been looking forward to it for so long I'm a bridesmaid And my daughter She is a flower girl Which is going to be so cute But kids are not Welcome to the aftermatch

the reception and so I'm like well I've got to bring my daughter because she is a flower girl but then if she's not welcome afterwards someone misses out so I then have to go back and sit in the hotel room with her

all night or my husband and it's just not fair. It's awkward. Yeah. And it is the, from the bride and groom, it is the epitome of child labour. We'll take your skill of cuteness, but once we've used that, we'll give you nothing in return. You're out of here. You don't get to enjoy the good parts.

I know. And we don't have heaps of money. And so we're flying the whole family up. Because I imagine people, normally your family members will be at the wedding. They can't really babysit, right? Yes, that's exactly right. And I can't be exactly like,

hey, can you go and sit in a room for the whole night and look after my child? Because I don't know anyone else up there I could use. It's tricky, because you could, yeah, the kids could have stayed back at home and you guys could have gone but obviously one of your children would have been part of the bridal party.

It's their big day and they should be able to do what they want to do and that is use your child for cuteness then kick them out of the party. I mean Ben's been doing it with me for years. He uses me for cuteness. All about his cuteness. Eventually I'm going to be kicked to the curb.

But it's an interesting question. Kids and weddings, should they be there? And have you had any bad experiences of kids with weddings? Well, good experiences too. We're not a negative show, are we? We like to balance out the negativity. There's something going around in the news recently about, and just the last week, about someone who wouldn't invite the daughter of the person she was marrying.

Yeah, so the guy was marrying his second wife, and she, the bride, is not a fan of children, so wouldn't let his nine-year-old daughter attend the wedding. See, that's, yeah, that's an interesting call. I mean, everyone, it's their wedding day. It's going to be a healthy stepmother relationship. Yeah, and at nine, you're at that age where you feel like they can be responsible, and, you know, like, there's no worry of them pulling down the wedding cake or the curtains or something

you know or the veil off or something you know i for one i'm a fan of kids at weddings because no matter how out of control uh i guess or other adults get the kids are always going to be worse they're always going to be the talking point the next day they can smoke screen the bad behavior of adults weddings for cousins before and it's always you know like you always feel very thankful to be invited to a wedding but when you end up as an adult on the kids table, have you had that happen before? It happened to me. What, you ended up on a kids table?

Well, you know, the table of all the, it was all the cousins so it made sense but there was some young and the parents were off. You're like I'm 30 and I'm here and am I now taking these kids on board? Why am I eating macaroni cheese out of a plastic bowl? We got our meals first, though, so that was good.

All right, now, we'll get some help for you here, Nicole. 0800, that's the telephone number. Let's help Nicole out. Kids, weddings, should they be there? Do they go hand in hand? Yeah, what happened at your wedding or your upcoming wedding? Did you say no? Did you have kids?

Was it good? Was it bad? We'd love to hear from you this morning. Give us a call on New Zealand's Breakfast. 0800 The Hits. Thought when I grew up I would be the same. Cause I care more about what other people say. What other people say.

It is The Hits. Jono and Ben, 817. We want to know kids in weddings on 0800 The Hits. What did you have with your wedding? Or maybe your upcoming wedding? Was it a yes? Was it a no to kids being part of the wedding day celebrations? Yeah, we just had Sarah phone through. She's in a bit of a conundrum.

Her daughter's been asked to be a flower girl. Sarah's a bridesmaid. But then the wedding's an away one. It's a family wedding. And then the bride and groom want to cull the child after the formalities. Milk the flower cuteness out of the little girl and then say

she's not allowed at the reception. So kids, weddings, do they go hand in hand? Our son, when he was about three, Oscar, he was a little, what do they call the altar boy? Not altar boys, what do they call them? Oh, the page boy? Page boy. Page boy for Bryce and Sharon. But I thought, jeez, they took a risk

because they had their dog and Oscar at three walking the dog down the aisle. And I was like, this is a gamble. Can't wait to see how this worked out. Anyway, the dog peed on the shoes. It might have been me. I don't know. Let's go to the phones. Emily, you're on from Taranaki.

Kids, weddings, yes, no? Yeah, in my opinion, yeah. We got married about five years ago, and it was a New Year's Eve wedding, and I organised a babysitter for everybody's kids. Oh, wow, that's awesome, have you? Yeah, well, we had, like, probably about 120 guests, and obviously a lot of people like to go out New Years and

we wanted them there with us so we were like okay we'll get a babysitter, 8.30pm you can hand your kids off and you guys can drink and do whatever because it was all at the same hotel. What a great idea! What a really really good idea. Did it work out well for you Emily? No because

the babysitter was not good and most of the kids stayed in the wedding. In hindsight, I would have just had them stay. They were fine. I mean, my husband was probably the biggest kid out of a lot of them. He was the biggest worry. Oh, thank you, Emily. That's great. So she's a fan for having kids at weddings.

I mean, they're a part of the family, aren't they? Yeah. Whether you love them or not, they're there. But it does get to a period of time where at some stage, if they're young kids, you go, well As soon as Aunt Joan Starts doing the YMCA Or the Macarena, it's time for the kids

To move on, isn't it? But it must be a boring location for kids after a while Be fun for 45 minutes Then the excitement would wear off The novelty's gone, we'll go to Nicky Welcome, you're on New Zealand's Breakfast, Nicky Kids at weddings, yes or no? Yes five minutes, then the excitement would wear off. The novelty's gone. We'll go to Nikki. Welcome. You're on New Zealand's Breakfast, Nikki. Kids at weddings, yes or no?

Yes. Yes. Definitely. And you're saying is there a cut-off period, though? Are you allowing kids for a certain period of time and then they've got to go? Or are you like, well, whatever, it's up to the parents? Well, we were the same. We had our wedding at a club room down Taranaki, and next to it there was, like like quarters for everyone to stay at.

And so the kids were sorted. They could all go back there, but none of them went. Oh, none of them went? None of them went. They were on the dance floor, and they were dancing. Oh, that's kind of cool. They were still dancing at midnight. Still dancing at midnight?

That would be shocking the next day, to play four parents the next day. What are you pumping into those kids? Hangovers dealing with kids that are tired But hey, they had fun That's what it's all about The wedding day It's one time

That's awesome Hey, good on you, Nicky Appreciate your call Just lovely calls on the hits We had kids just the time of our life Just great, positive people That's what we like We've changed, mate

That's all part of the new change Leticia, you're on from Hamilton Morty and kids at the wedding Yes, I had my older brother's wedding people here. That's what we like. We've changed, mate. That's all part of the new change. Leticia, you're on from Hamilton. Maudie and kids at the wedding. Yes, I had my older brother's wedding that I didn't attend because kids weren't allowed. So my kids are part of me, so I didn't attend that one.

Oh, you didn't go to the wedding? No, I didn't. I refused to go because kids weren't allowed. Took a protest. What happened? Did they know the reasons why that you you didn't go yeah yeah they know and they were like okay that's your choice yeah they didn't argue it or anything so has it made things all keys um well we didn't have a best of relationship to start off with so you know it was awkward to start off with and awkward in the end so

all right even more awkward in the end so it was more of an obligation that they invited you pretty much yeah right listen, I tell you what, the best thing is not to confront them face-to-face. Talk behind their back. Have the backlash on the radio. A lot of that happens. We're going to end on Frankie. You're on from Christchurch. Did you have a kid at a wedding, Frank? Oh my God, Jono and Ben, you guys don't know the half of it. Oh, really? Well, tell us some of it oh really we'll tell some of that um i was like a big yes to kids at wedding until this little girl she must have been like three

or four in san francisco her name is annie the day wedding was a jewish wedding that kid had it in for the bride and grooms from the very beginning what she did she destroyed all the flower arrangements and put flowers all over the floor and she proceeded to interrupt the toast you know she was at that shouting age but the worst thing happened there were dancing like the have a nagila that have uh nagila you know you were saying and the kid was on the father's shoulders and now after a few twirl, the kid projectile vomited onto the dance floor. Now, the bride was able to evade the spew. The groom, who was a bit pissed by this point, he slipped through the dance floor.

He got full of spew. They had to evacuate it to clean it. He went out with a purpose. Helicopter vomit. Wow, if that doesn't put you off having kids at a wedding. Yeah, well, there we go go It's just after we've gone Oh wow That is amazing

I'm in my 30s and I still don't have kids Because of it It's traumatised yeah It put you off Yeah completely That's a great call Frankie Really appreciate you listening And I know this has gone on a while

But apparently we need to take Megan in Auckland Kids at weddings Megan Hi there What happened? Well we got married on our 13 year wedding anniversary We had a 2 and a 4 year old at the time And our 4 year old little boy decided Once the music came on that

He would strip his shirt off and helicopter around his head Ben does the same thing Yeah I do It's a lot cuter when a kid's doing it Yeah that's why you were told to sit at the kids table Good on you, Megan. Appreciate your call. Ben and Jono call this show Jono and Ben.

Breakfast on the hips. The hips. I went to pick up my daughter from school yesterday. It's because you're a good dad. You don't need them at the gate. Often we'll meet them. She'll walk down to the gate and stuff. But yesterday I was a little bit early, so I waited outside and went,

oh, we'll go into the class and pick her up from in the class after 3 o'clock. And it's kind of cool. Every now and again you get to see some of the work that they've been working on and stuff. Do you pull up a pew and sit in the classroom or are you watching through the windows? Oh, no, this was after school had finished. The bell had rung and stuff. And I was like, oh, can you show me some of the work you've been doing? And she'd put a picture on the wall of some of the family.

They had to draw pictures of the family and sort of write about each person. And this is the same daughter that in the past had put me in a Hellenstein Brothers T-shirt, which has the Absinthe logo that I like to wear from time to time. It's a brand of Hellenstein's clothing that I've got, and it says Absinthe. But as you point out, it makes you look like an Absinthe father when you draw a picture of his dad with a big absent across the front.

Well, not only is it a shocking brand, but it's also reflective of Ben's parenting as well. So it works on a couple of levels. But anyway, they've written up about your dad, mum, and all the things that they like. Now, when you think of things about me, guys, what are the things that I like? I think you'd have plenty of options of things that I like.

I mean, I've got a tattoo about Dwayne the Rock Johnson. I like that. I was banging on about things like the Warriors, the basketball, you know, sports. There's lots of things I feel like make up my mind. I've got a Toy Story backpack. There's lots of things that you could say, oh, hey. That's Ben's thing.

This is what Ben likes. This is what Dad likes. But she's got, you know, Mom likes this, Dad likes that. And under Dad, she's got tidying up. Is that your hobby? That's my hobby that's my that's my that's what dad likes he's like yeah i think mom was like read you know reading or something like that reading's cool yeah tidying up that's your thing is that my thing is that my it's like oh dad yeah he's the tidy up guy i don't like tidying up i just do it yeah

tidying up is a giant cloud that hangs over every human being's head it's not my thing i don't like tidying up. I just do it. Tidying up is a giant cloud that hangs over every human being's head. It's not my thing. I don't go up in the morning and go, God, I can't wait to tidy up the house today. But that's what you do. Isn't it interesting? Through the lens of a child, they probably don't really understand truly what their parents are like

or who they are aside from just being a parent and getting stuff done. Daddy likes tidying up. God, he loves tidying up. They don't see you doing any of your fun stuff. Oh, Dad, he likes tidying up. God, he loves tidying up, doesn't he? Well, they don't see you doing any of your fun stuff. Yeah. Yeah, they're like, all they see you doing is tidying up. That must be what he loves doing. So I'm like, I'm now around the school.

I'm the guy who loves tidying up. It's my hobbies and interests. I'll come along here. My hobbies and interests. A bleak Tinder profile. What's this guy like? Oh, he likes tidying up. Okay.

Tell me more. So I'm not getting any matches. That's where you go going wrong, mate. She's a very sensible child, Indy, though, isn't she? She is, actually. She's, tell you what, she should retire from school and actually go into retirement. She could fast forward through her entire life. That's how sensible she is.

But I don't think you had any part in making her, to be honest. Yeah, well, that's probably true. I was too busy tidying up, mate. What's going on in there? I'll tidy up after you. Do you want me to wash the sheet? Yeah, okay. Yeah, well, that's probably true. I was too busy tidying up, mate. What's going on in there? I'll tidy up after you. Do you want me to wash the sheet? Yeah, okay. That's the hits.

You've got Jono and Ben. New Zealand's breakfast. This is Jono and Ben on the hits. Yada, good morning. Welcome along to the show. It is a Thursday morning. It's good to be with you this morning. Yeah, lovely stuff.

Jeez, I'll tell you what. You know what I enjoy about parking? Because we park in the casino. It's a 24- with you this morning. Yeah, lovely stuff. Jeez, I tell you what, you know what I enjoy about parking in the casino? It's a 24-hour operation, the casino. Always guns blazing in the casino. There's all sorts of characters. And I bumped into a lovely, toothless man this morning. Wonderful, heart of gold. And he said, do I know you from prison?

And gave me a big hug. High five, do I know you from prison? You look like you could have high five do I know you look like you could have well that was stereotyping you part of me was offended but then the other part of me was like I look rugged enough that I could have been in prison so yeah we had a wonderful conversation I said no no not from prison worse the hits breakfast show you can put me in prison no No, no, he was lovely. But yeah, it was quite flattered. I was quite flattered.

We've got a big show this morning. We're joined by Blair Chook, Peter Burling. You'll know them from Team New Zealand, winning the America's Cup and winning silver, their third medal in the Olympics. They join us after eight. But speaking of sporting legends, Sir Graham Henry's popping in next.

How's that? Graham Henry, a former school principal, and every time we've talked to him on the phone, I always still feel like a student talking to a school principal. Yeah, yeah. Don't you? Yeah, I don't want to upset Graham. I want Graham to like me.

Yeah, we're walking on eggshells this morning around Sir Graham. It seems lovely, but I just feel like I just don't want to, you know, like... You don't want him to think any less of you. It's beyond our best behaviour. Sir Graham Henry joins us next. He's doing something very important with Plunkett and you need to hear about it in a few moments on The Hits. I love cheap drills.

It's the cheap drills. It is The Hits. Now there's a national lottery going on. It's raising money for Plunkett. You can head to the Plunkett website to check out the amazing prizes that you could win through this national lottery. And we're joined in the studio by legendary rugby coach Sir Graham Henry. he's a plunkett ambassador and also on the phone in otago from otago university is professor richie polton and you guys sir graham you have a special

connection you taught richie is that right sir graham yeah we go back oh 40 years richie yeah 40 plus he was an orcan grammar student i was a teacher there. But he was a good sportsman. It's hard to believe. Well, not really. Guys, I'll tell you the truth. Myself and my mates, we actually taught Ted how to coach rugby. So I think New Zealand knows us something, don't you? No, they're very good. So now you've teamed up with Plunkett because you've got the national lottery, Sir Graham,

and you're the face of Plunkett. What a face. What a pretty face, eh? I'm good on radio. No, no, we're doing this National Lottery. We've had a lot of support from people who have provided prizes. Some fantastic prizes we're looking at as well. Ben, you'll get an opportunity to buy a couple of books.

Don't worry about that. I feel like I'm going to buy some of them. You've got to beat Coast. They bought six, so seven books between the two of you will do the business. Are you pointing off raffle tickets as well? No, no, lottery, lottery. Plunket lottery. Let's get it right.

That's seven books each, right? Oh, jeez. We'll buy some tickets. So you're breaking up again, Richie. I couldn't quite hear with that one. And so this year all the money raised is going towards something that you've spent many years studying, Richie. What is it?

Yeah, so we want to equip those Blunket nurses, equip them with the ability to teach both parents and via the parents to children self-regulation skills. Now self-regulation from the Dunedin study which I lead has been shown to be one of the most important and powerful predictors of how life turns out. In other words, if you've got plenty of this stuff when you start out life, you're going to be far more successful than people who,

for whatever reason, don't have so much self-regulation. But the good news is that it's teachable, it's learnable, it's like a skill playing footy or playing the violin or doing art. You can learn it. And so we want to equip the Plunkett nurses who go and visit mums and dads and homes very early in the life of their child, give them the ability to teach these sorts of skills

in a way that kids like. In other words, we teach them games, fun things to do that have, as part of how they work, elements that strengthen self-control or self-regulation. It's talked about by international bodies like the OECD as the 21st century skill, self-regulation. So in lay language, it's basically the ability to control your emotions rather than have them control you.

I wish I'd known that 75 years ago. Controlling your emotions? Somehow you slipped through, Ted. You've done okay for someone with more self-regulation. You're pretty good at controlling your emotions, aren't you? Actually, I do remember my mum bought me your book, Sir Graham, and I remember something that sticks with me today about controlling your environment is something that you used to do with your coaching teams as well as, you know,

where coach was not getting too caught up, good or bad, in the press or what people were saying about social media. I had the radio when we were good. When we won and we played well, the radio was on, the television was on. Right. You couldn't get a newspaper. But if we played badly, nah, we just shut down. No newspaper, no radio, no television. No social media, I imagine, as well.

My mum used to ring me and say, how are you putting up with all this rubbish in the papers and on the radio? Didn't come from your program, obviously. No, no, no, no. The rubbish came from our program, but not rubbish about you. Now, Sir Graham, we were discussing before you came in that you're well known for not smiling. And so what we've done...

You've got a good smile. I got a smile just then. Wow. You're very persuasive, John. Who's not going to smile at that face looking at Christy? It doesn't make you want to smile, eh? So we have got some rugby-themed jokes here to see if we can get a smile from Sir Graeme.

These are from the internet. They're pretty terrible, to be honest. I'll do my best. I'll try and keep it straight. You can write these words. Are you in this contest, Richie? Yeah, Richie can be involved. Okay.

Okay, you say if you smile too, Richie. Okay. I'm smiling at it already. Okay, this is going to be awkward. What's the difference between the Australian rugby team and a teabag? A teabag stays in the cup longer. No, no smile.

Nothing, okay. You got a groan from Richie, the professor. Graham's shaking his head. He's not happy with that one. I've just worked out the joke. It's taken me that long to work out the joke. Yeah, probably more. He's been around World Cup time.

Anyway. What insect lives in your carpet and is good at scoring tries? The rugby. These are worse than dad jokes. They are. Can't we do better than this boy? Because once you've seen rugby joke, you've seen a mall.

A mall. There we go. See the mall. Fantastic. There we go. God, it must have taken you ages to work these ones we googled those we googled those as well as the blanket website now in all seriousness uh so nice to talk to you guys and well done on all the great work you're doing for for kids of new zealand it really is our worst nightmare isn't

it it's our greatest nightmare in this country i mean 20 of our end of our kids are in poverty and that's why i joined the foundation originally i've been there for about seven or eight years now and we're making a difference which is fantastic uh it is so awesome if you want to check out all in poverty. And that's why I joined the foundation originally. I've been there for about seven or eight years now. And we're making a difference, which is fantastic. It is so awesome. If you want to check out all the amazing things for the National Lottery for Plunkett, you can head to plunkett.org.nz. It is the hits.

You've got Jono and Ben, Samir and Sharon for your Thursday morning. It is 6.14. Kia ora. I'm Rachel Jackson-Lees, this is the B***h News. Yeah, this is the news and beeps, or as I like to call it, Jono and Ben sit back and let Julie do all the heavy lifting. How does the game work, June?

I find some fun little headlines and beep out a couple of words. You guys have to guess what the full headline is. Do you reckon this is the world's earliest game show? It must be up there. It would be. It would be top five early game shows. That's true. Usually I go for international headlines, but this is a local one.

Udder Chaos. Canterbury cow gets saved by a... I love the udder chaos. I know. I had to put that in there. Don't get lost in the pun, Ben. We're going to add another pun to it. Udder Chaos.

Canterbury cow gets saved by a milkshake. So it's like... So you think the cow will get a shake. Anyway, that's what I'm going for. Love it. I'm going to say Canterbury cow gets saved by a giant jump over the moon, the little dog laughed, the sea shut sport, and the dish ran away with the spoon.

I love it. Out of chaos, Canterbury cow gets saved by a crane. So this story sort of broke early last night. And so it was at a dairy farm. And during milking, the cow somehow got into the middle of the milking platform when usually they sort of like back out and go in. And so the middle was really hard to get a cow out. It's like down.

It's about a metre down from where the cows stand. Yeah. And so firefighters were called, vets were called, and a crane was called. They had to lift the cow with the crane. They removed the iron sheeting from the top of the shed. The cow was blissfully unaware because the vet had come and sedated it. But there are photos of this cow just chilling in mid-air,

like in a harness. Passed out. Yeah, being saved from the middle of a milking platform. And then it was returned to the paddock with all the other cows. So it's all happy as Larry now. like in a harness. Passed out. Yeah, being saved from the middle of a milking platform. And then it was returned to the paddock with all the other cows. So it's all happy as Larry now. Oh, nice end to that story. It's like us saving Juliet from the tavern.

Green her out. Yeah, true. Was it worth it, though? I mean, don't get me wrong. I don't want to see a cow perish. But you've hired a crane. You've removed a roof. You have to reattach the roof.

There are other options. But it's lovely. It's lovely they've gone to that. Yeah. I don't want to get in that much trouble. You've removed a roof. You have to reattach the roof. There are other options. But it's lovely. It's lovely they've gone to that. Yeah, no more trouble. Did they try a ramp? Oh, that's a good idea. They don't want to hear that now, do they? No, no.

Did you try a ramp? Oh, you could have said that before we took the roof off. We got the helicopter. Next news story. Jeff Bezos is no longer the... Bald. I'm going to say he's no longer bald, and I hope he's got some good news for Jono. Jeff Bezos is no longer going to fly to space in a phallic-shaped rocket.

He's decided, I'll design a new one. Jeff Bezos is no longer the richest person in the world. So remember that French guy we were talking about the other week? So he's overtaken Bezos, and that's because Amazon's stock price dropped, basically. So his net worth dropped about $14 billion in one day. The French gentleman's a champagne baron, isn't he? Yeah, so he started and runs Mould & Shandon, Louis Vuitton, Dior, Sephora, Tiffany & Co.

He's the big guy. There's some big brands. Bernardino. That's in there. We've actually got some Bernardino news coming up shortly if you missed it, so we'll tell you what's going on there. Bored Olympic cameraman under fire for cutting away from hockey match to film... I'm saying he cut away from the hockey match to film the latest series of

Celebrity Treasure Island coming soon to TVNZ2. And what a series it's going to be. Well, I've seen the promos on there, so I was like, that's what he was filming. I'm going to say Olympic Cameraman Under Fire for cutting away from hockey match

to film a TikTok video. Oh, that's good. Bored Olympic Cameraman Under Fire for cutting away from hockey match to film cockroach instead. So in the last five minutes of this hockey match, they unexpectedly cut to a littleroach instead. So in the last five minutes of this Hockey Match, they unexpectedly cut to a little cockroach scurrying along

like a platform thing. Really zoomed up, great camera quality of this cockroach. But people were kind of confused. And people were like, well, when you get a sports media job, you're actually not into sports. And they were talking about the cockroach. They were commentating it for like a good few seconds because normally the way those things work there's a director and in a truck so deciding what shots to use and there's lots of different camera people

yeah so it's normally someone else is like hey i've got this thing over here do you want it oh sweet no you know yeah so the camera man would go i'm over here filming a cockroach do you want a boss yeah and they would have gone yeah let's go with it for five minutes. Yeah. Keep rolling. So it's more of a director. Yeah. For sure.

And, you know, great camera work for a nature documentary as well. Yeah. I mean, Attenborough would be looking at that guy for his next one. For sure. And that is the news and beeps for you. Ah, that's awesome. But it is the hits. You've got Jono and Ben at 6.23.

Jono and Ben, or as they're known in the office, those two. Jono and Ben, New 6.23 Jono and Ben or as they're known in the office those two Jono and Ben New Zealand's breakfast on the hits Now of course the Olympics are going on right now

we've been talking about how much we've been really enjoying that yesterday not quite the medal haul yesterday than from the day before but still some pretty pretty blooming good

efforts from the Kiwis Did you watch the cycling last night? Yeah they were going for bronze and they had a bit of a crash which is a bit of a shame Unfortunately yeah I'd say God that sport would give me anxiety that sport Did you watch the cycling last night? Yeah, they were going for bronze and they had a bit of a crash. Unfortunately, yeah.

God, that sport would give me anxiety. Have you seen the Pursuit version of cycling? There's like three of them and they're all kind of like dotting around slowly and then they're just waiting for the moment to strike and then there's some poor guy at the beginning keeps looking back, looking behind him, going someone's following me, I need to get, yeah.

It would be very anxious, right, that sport? Yeah, I'd be like, just leave me alone! Let me keep cycling. But it's a great sport and geez the technology they were talking about they were saying the uh who won the italians who won their bikes they're not even on the market you can't buy them but they were designed by an italian car company that's the investment they put into it and they'll like change their helmets they'll wear their helmets for these olympic, but the technology will advance so quickly that the next Games, there'll be whole new helmets. Far out. I'll tell you something

else that amazed me. I was watching a bit of the skateboarding yesterday, and how young some of the competitors are. Now, there was this was the park skateboarding competition, which was won by a 19-year-old. But who came? 12 years old, the competitor came second, and a 13 year old came

third oh my there's also and i think about skateboarding that's that's the demographic probably is but you think of you know we got kids that are you know i was 11 years old you think of that you know your kids going over the olympics is someone else also 12 years old from syria playing table tennis in this olympics which is pretty incredible and then the oldest athlete in tokyo at the moment is 66, and she is Australian who is a equestrian rider. Wow. So there you go.

There's quite a range of people that are still, you know, there's still hope for us yet. If we hadn't taken up skateboarding at age 12, there's still hope for us there. To sit on a horse. And let the horse do all the work. But you claim the gold. You know what I mean?

Think about it. Yeah, the horse, yeah. The horses, yeah. You're just sitting there trying not to fall off. I'm sure there's more to it than that, but anyway. Yeah, we've really

dumbed down equestrian there, haven't we? Well done to all of the athletes. Young and old. Yeah. You know, the Olympics doesn't

discriminate. No. Unless you're a steroided up Russian. And then you can't get involved. Hey, next, there's some big news

around one of New Zealand's favourite sparkling wine. We'll tell you some of it. And as well as that, the Queen. She's got a new product out. Yes, the Queen. That's in a few moments' time on the hits. That's some of the news. It's happening in New Zealand

and around the world. Yeah, it's time now for your news update, delivered by two people who are barely awake. Here we go. Ben, what's been happening? Well, a sad day for Kiwi drinkers. Following an announcement yesterday that Bernardino, one of New Zealand's cheapest sparkling wines, is going to be discontinued. The green bottle had Spumante written up the top.

Bernardino came in about, it was usually priced around $10 to $12. It's no longer going to be carried on. So it's the last of it. And it's caused a frenzy on social media, and many, many great comments going around. That's the thing with this stuff. When everyone's like, oh, it's being discontinued, it does cause a frenzy.

But the reason it's being discontinued is because all you people having a frenzy weren't buying it. You used to buy it. You used to buy it, yeah. It's a great memory. And then you turned into an adult. We've got some of the best comments and texts that we've found on social media. But if you've got anything, if you've got anything you want to say,

you know, it's a little bit of, I guess, RIP to Bernardino. Yeah, we'll have an ode to Bernardino after 7.30. So anything, any condolences you'd like to pass on, 4487, text them through. I loved Producer Humphries yesterday after he read this article online, went to the liquor store, or the liqueur store, as my daughter Andy would call it. You're going to the liqueur store. It does look like liqueur. But Ben Humphreys, who I worked into the liqueur store yesterday,

and he's like, have you got any Bernardino? And she's like, you're from a radio station. And he's like, yeah. And apparently there'd been three other people there that day from the radio station going in. Oh, I tell you what, it's a race to the quirky story arc on this one, isn't it? Yeah, it is. Who do you reckon's in the race?

I reckon ZM are throwing their hat in the ring. Yeah, I reckon, yeah. Edge would be in there. Hauraki might even. Hauraki will give it a crack. Yeah. No, we'll see. Probably not a Hosking thing, right, eh?

No, he'll step out. He's too sophisticated for this. Yeah. No, we'll see. Probably not a Hosking thing, right, eh? No, he'll step out. He's too sophisticated for this. Yeah. Hosking would never drink Bernardino, but we'll see which radio show wins this one, eh? Now, because Julie, on WhatsApp last night, yourself and Millennial Max were like, listen, please explain to us what Bernardino is. Yeah. Because you hadn't heard of it before.

No, no. And so we did send back an explanation, which was basically, think of the most sophisticated wine in the world and raise your expectations by 30%. And I was like, oh my God, Dom Perignon, hello. Yeah. Well, Bernardino is the exact opposite end of that scale. It's great for 15-year-olds and alcoholics on a budget,

is what we said. And, you know, back in the day, we didn't have 0% health-conscious pals. Oh, yeah, I know. We had full carbs, Bernardino, Spumanti. I couldn't figure out if the Spumanti was what the brand of wine was or what the effect the wine was going to have on you. That was one of my favourite comments.

I was just reading online because it said Spumante up the wide neck bottle and it said the Spumante written up the neck was like a glimpse into the future. What is Spumante? Exactly what happened at the end of the night. It's a little taste of what was to come. They're proud of New Zealand.

Go New Zealand! If only New Zealand was proud of them jono and ben new zealand's breakfast on the hits let's see graham henry join us in the studio this morning it's just pretty awesome i mean he's such a legendary uh rugby coach for new zealand and around the world yeah he's here for plunkets wasn't he and uh he's an ambassador yeah he's an ambassador for plunket great work he's been doing it for about nine or ten years, and they're having a national lottery, so they're selling tickets. Raffle tickets, yeah.

Yeah, and you can buy those tickets. And during the interview, Sir Graham said to us, well, you'll be both buying seven books each. I mean, you know, you laugh it off as on-air fodder. Yeah. On-air, you know, classic Graham. Yeah. Well, this is Sir Graham.

Anyway, I mean, he's a legend. So, I mean, you know. He said, Coast, Tony Street, classic Graham. Yeah. Well, this is Graham Henry. I mean, he's a legend. So, I mean, you know. He said Coast, Tony Street and Sam Wallace, they bought seven books over at Coast. I'm like, did they? Did they really? They definitely didn't buy seven books. I know Sam Wallace.

He wouldn't have bought seven books. Well, the books, I mean, they're going to a great cause. I mean, Plunkett is the, you know, it's an amazing cause in New Zealand. So I encourage everyone to buy them. But they're $50 each. The books, you can buy, obviously, cheaper tickets. So I think there's the $10 tickets and you can buy a book for $5050 each. The books, you can buy obviously cheaper tickets so I think they're $10 tickets

and you can buy a book for $50. But he was like, Sam Wallace and yeah. So then he goes, the interview finishes, we start playing music and move on with the programme

so that was lovely to meet Sue Graham. Knock, knock, knock at the door, Sue Graham, Henry's there with his backpack, his handwritten diary and he comes back in

and he's like, it's your worst nightmare. It's your worst nightmare. I'm back. And we're like, oh, did you forget something? No, no. The lottery book. Oh, we'd forgotten about that.

Yeah, I know. So we had to buy some lottery tickets. Not as much as coast, if that's the rumour, you know, but, you know, and it does go into a great cause. So good on Graham, Henry. So Graham for going out there and doing this. I mean, it was an interview. Interviews traditionally, they aren't two halves,

but somehow Graham turned it into two halves, and he dominated us in the second half. Off air. Great coaching player, too. So then we ended up buying these books, and I said, oh, I don't have my EFOS card. He's like, that's fine, we've got online banking. His defence was wonderful, defence strategy. The boy's defence coach, he was saying last year

for the Blues, so he's still got great defence there. So then he had the handwritten diary, and he's like, here's the account number, and he sort of stands over you as he extorts the money out of you, and he's still got great defence there. So then he had the handwritten diary, he's like, here's the account number and he sort of stands over you as he extorts the money out of you, and he's like, now I'm off to see the guy who owns Briscoes. I'm like, oh, the guy who owns Briscoes, he is

in for a roasting. So good, I mean, it's all going to a wonderful cause, and if you want to donate, you can head to plunkett.org.nz, get a raffle ticket. There's amazing prizes, including a $40,000 spa pool. So head to the hits.co.nz or Graham Henry might find you on the street. We could have let him down. He left and was like, well, you can't say no to Graham Henry.

I know, he's a legend. It's like the mafia coming to a small business going, where's the protection money? You're like, well, you can't say no. There's no other option. We've got some spy entertainment news on the way. Yes, Megan Markle has turned 40 and she's come back into the spotlight to celebrate. I'll tell you in what

way before 7 o'clock. It is a hit. Spy. No what's up. Spy.co.nz Ben, I don't know if you agree, if I had the skill and half the skill and talent of producer Juliet at her age I'd be doing far better things with my life. But the only skills I have are being Jono

from Jono and Ben. So I'm stuck here, but you can go on to better things, June. That's a great skill, though. You guys both have the great skill of being Jono and Ben. What was that? Was that a compliment or what was that? Yes, it was. You both have a great skill of being Jono and Ben. Yes.

It's like my mum's trying to make me feel better after something's gone wrong Anyway In the day of a life of being Jono and Ben, do you guys get stressed And if so, do you stress eat Is that a thing for you guys Stress eating?

No, you don't really I do get very hungry by the time I get home From the radio in the early afternoon One of your big bugbears Is getting home and looking forward To a meal from the night before in the fridge And then And you're just ravenous. One of your big bugbears, though, is getting home and looking forward to a meal from the night before in the fridge and then someone else is eating it. Oh, that's the worst.

I'm not around there in the morning family routine. Policing your... Yes, a lot of the day I did it and I was like, oh, that chicken pad ties was waiting for me in the fridge. Someone is calling your name. And you've mentally did stitch. I know, you're like,

oh, what was that? Anyway, so, Jennifer Aniston has revealed, yes, she stress eats, but what she stress eats is a single crisp. Just one crisp, crunch, crunch, crunch. One chip. And that's all she eats when she's stressed out.

And if she doesn't have a chip available, she eats a single M&M. And she says that the willpower, she's got great willpower to not devour a whole bag of chips or a whole bag of M&Ms. Because I find it easier to not have a chip than to only just have one and then stop there oh totally get started you're like oh geez these are good but if you're like oh no you sit back yeah i'm like how you just may as well not even eat the chip if you're stressed you know yeah and it's like you know the criminal mastermind that invented onion dip i mean even just a droplet on your tongue of onion dip.

Don't even get me started. I think I nailed one in about four minutes, that whole bowl the other day. By yourself? Yeah. Oh, wow. Just once you start scooping, it's just a non-stop train. It's my summer meal.

Like, every summer I whip out kiwi onion dip and chips, and it's actually probably really concerning how much of that I eat over summer that's why I'm not Jennifer Anderson and I'm just Jono from the house just Jono you're doing well you're doing well being Jono and Megan Markle has turned 40 and to celebrate she did a video with Melissa McCarthy oh here, here we go. Not sure. Here we go. I'm not sure why Melissa McCarthy was involved, but Melissa McCarthy did really raise the bar. Because Meghan Markle said she'd kidnap her family if she didn't do it?

No, but she celebrated by announcing with Melissa her 40 by 40 initiative, which is encouraging people to commit 40 minutes of their time to support young women going back to work. Oh, now I feel like a monster. No, no, no, here we go. No, but it was actually quite entertaining, the video. It's my 40th birthday and I've got an idea.

I know what it is. My first guess is at another photo shoot under a tree where you're looking very peaceful. Peaceful under a tree is me every day. Are you finally going to do a Suits reunion? I love Suits, but why would I do a Suits reunion for my birthday? Why would the cast of Friends do a reunion for my birthday? But they did it. I think the bigger idea is...

Yacht party! Who's ready for a yacht? So, Melissa did make it, you know. She was working hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But Prince Harry, he crashed the video by juggling in the background. Really? Yeah, he was in the background.

Actually, like, can he juggle? Yeah, he was juggling. I think he sort of, like, failed eventually. But Meghan noticed, turned around and was like, what is my husband doing? But yeah, happy birthday to Meghan Markle. All the royals wish her a happy birthday. All the Instagram and Twitter accounts. So maybe there's no beef there.

Who knows? And that is Spy from where you can enter the hitstockcode.nz. After seven o'clock, as well as five words of $5,000, we're on the hunt for the most talented lister. The most talented. Yes, you listening right now, what can you do that word? You don't have to do it. Just tell us what you can do.

We do need to specify because we've got the introduction for this too, don't we, Juliet? It's this. I don't know if I do have that. I haven't seen the introduction. It's this. I don't know if I do have that. I haven't seen to the introduction. It's the most talented listener listening right now. You're not going to take out the most talented listener because there might be more talented listeners

after 8 o'clock. Just stipulating. And you don't even have to display your talents, really. You just have to tell us what you do. It's an honesty system here. I can do three backflips. Okay, we'll take word for it. It's radio.

No one lies to us at the hits. Yeah. We'll do that after seven. New Zealand's breakfast. This is Jono and Ben on the hits. Morning. It's just gone to seven o'clock. Jono and Ben with you.

A bit of unsettled weather. Stronger winds around the country. More rain. So it's getting a bit colder. Colder throughout the rest of the week. So a good week to sit inside, watch some Olympics. You know what I like? I like it when Ben tells me what's happening in the Olympics. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's one of my favourite parts of the week, so a good week to sit inside and watch some Olympics. You know what I like? I like it when Ben tells me what's happening in the Olympics.

Oh yeah? Yeah, that's one of my favourite parts of the day. Well today is another potentially good day for New Zealand, all going well. We've got Lisa Carrington back in action again this afternoon to see if she can add a sixth medal. Oh, I met some lovely lovely ladies in the cafe yesterday.

Stop bragging about it. Stop bragging about the lovely ladies you met in the cafe. Yeah,'s not brag about all the lovely ladies you've been in the cafe do you want to talk about my date with three lovely ladies no uh but they were of uh an older generation and boy they could not stop saying favorable things about lisa carrington not about you though not about me the date went terribly uh but geez i love lisa carrington is awesome so she's back in action this afternoon. Karate as well. New Zealanders in action.

Golf Lydia Ko. And athletics this afternoon as well, around about 2 o'clock. Jack O'Gill and Tom Walsh in the men's shot put final. So hopefully, you know, one of those guys can take out a medal on that. And a bit more cycling later on. As we mentioned earlier, one of the cyclists from New Zealand, the team, they had a bit of a crash when they were going for bronze. It was such a shame.

It was, yeah. He fell off the bike after clipping the wheel of another teammate. And his Lycra, like he'd done that thing when you burn your skin on the floor, on the wooden floor, you know, on the gym. And his Lycra had ripped. And it's, yeah. And then, you know, you're in Lycra and you're in those weird looking helmets and you're going

ouch it's strange no one can pull off that look can they well I also like after the race because obviously they wear almost like

a Lycra sort of short wetsuit like it's so tight and it's obviously really tight so when they go do interviews afterwards it's so tight

that they zip down the front and it's almost like quite a lot yeah showing a lot of bike cleavage it's almost like they change around a low yeah showing a lot of bike cleavage yeah

it's almost like you can change around and go back to the 70s nightclub or something my other bugbear too with the cycling outfits too are we talking about

bugbears with cycling outfits oh we are now yeah is you know the cross region the design of the outfit really zeroes in on it you know

it's almost like they have a different colour for that region and an extra padding and your eyes are just drawn to it when they shouldn't be. Just make it the same as the rest of them. Anyway, that's Jon and Ben's hot takes on cycling.

Five words for 5k on the hits. You're only five words away from a massive payday. It is our game of word association. We play it every morning at 7.45. We name five words, you tell us the first things that pop into your head. And if your five words match with ours, you win $5,000. She's a receptionist in a medical centre.

Come on down, Catherine. Hello, how are you? Oh, good. You sound like a bubble of joy. Off to work? Yeah, nearly the end of the week, so that's great. I know. Your mood really starts to improve Thursday onwards, doesn't it?

It does. It does. You made it through the trenches, Kath. All right. Your big decision to match five words with one of us this morning is who you're going to send into the SPB, otherwise known as the Soundproof Booth, otherwise known as the Silent Private Box. Oh, look, I think Ben's got to have a go.

Oh, OK. That's been a lot of Jono thoughts. Too much, Jono. Ben's got to have a go. Oh, OK. That's been a lot of Jono thoughts. Too much, Jono. He's been in there for ages. Yeah, no. So he's in now, and it's an incredibly dangerous place for someone like Ben Boyce to be alone with his dark thoughts. But he's locked himself into the soundproof booth, and we'll get into the five words for

this morning. Remember, Catherine, the first word that comes into your head and we must remind you too that when Ben does come out, we must remind you of the careless whisper law as well, Juliet. If you do whisper any answers, Catherine, to Ben, you will hear this. And abruptly be ejected from the game,

but here we go. Okay, I'll be good. Harley is word number one. Oh, Davidson. That's the best. Second word today on a Thursday for Catherine. Chat. What's that?

Chat. Chat. C-H-A-T. Talk. Talk? Voucher. Oh. Voucher? Oh, voucher. Can we come back to that one?

All righty. Bernardino, topical. Um, sparkling? Sparkling, Bernardino. Yeah, is that... That's good, yeah. It's a tough one, because there's a lot of words that come to mind with Bernardino. Maybe we'll change it to wine.

Wine, okay, lock in wine, yeah. Vomit? Chuck. Chuck, yeah, I mean, there's all options, but we'll lock in wine. Okay, the fifth word was remote this morning there, Catherine. Remote. Oh, gosh. Remote.

Control. Beautiful. Now, you were stuck on word three, voucher. Voucher. You're going to get a voucher, you're going to get a... Oh. I don't know. You get a voucher, you get...

Oh, I don't know. You get a voucher, you get... Oh, I don't know. Is anything popping into your mind, Juliet? Yes. Yeah? What's Juliet? Give me a clue, Juliet. What's something that you... Well, the one that I would say.

What's something that you might say before you say voucher? Oh, I'm giving you a something voucher. Gift, gift, gift. Oh, nice. Okay. Are you locking in gift. Oh, I'm giving you a something voucher. Gift, gift, gift. Oh, nice. Okay. Are you locking in gift? Yep, doing gift. All right.

It's all on you, Juliet, if this goes bad on word three. We'll unleash Ben from the soundproof booth as he emerges now. That booth also is used for delinquent teenagers to vape in passion as well after work hours. So if you'd like to pash, you're welcome to in our soundproof. But Ben Boyce, Catherine did really well. She's going to spend the money on a trip to Queenstown. Oh, nice.

If she wins $5,000. Okay, you went to Queenstown the other day. You pounded the economy. I did. The stimulators. Oh, that's cool. It's a lot of fun. A lot of great stuff to do down there.

You'll enjoy it. But we're getting ahead of ourselves. Ben went on a shark boat Yeah I did You could be on a shark boat Too Catherine Oh no That doesn't sound like me

It was fun He was too tight To pay for his kids To go on the shark boat But he went on there Alright let's match Five words with Kath Okay we'll make it quick

Harley Well there's two For me But I won't Long story short I'm going to lock in the one that my kids didn't dress up as last Halloween Davidson. Harley Quinn was the other option was it? Yeah that was the first one I saw on my head but I saw all that.

Chat. A lot of rubbish chat on the show but what comes into your mind? Chat. Talk? Three from three. Two from two. Two from two. You're going to hit yourself. Sorry. I was nervous about word three because there's a lot of gravitas on this word. A lot of writing on Juliet's shoulders here.

Oh, God. Really? Word three was voucher. Voucher. Oh, there's a couple there for that one, isn't there? I don't like saying them out loud, so I'm just going to go... Gift. Thanks, Juliet.

I almost said petrol. Petrol was the other one I was thinking of. Petrol vouchers. Juliet put her kahunas on the line. This is good. We've got three. let's go Bernardino Topical There's lots there

Again, I'll just go with the first that popped into my head Spumante Catherine, what did you go? I went wine Wine, I, sparkling. The fifth word was remote. TV. Control TV.

TV. Nah. What did we have for that one? Control. Oh, that was what I, yeah. Three out of five. Listen, it has been a long time between drinks in this game, and I am getting incredibly dehydrated.

It's the Bernardino there, mate. You can help yourself. Catherine, you are an angel. Thank you so much for listening to the program. Have we got some shampoos left? More of those? Yeah, I think we've got some. I feel like we've given away an extraordinary amount of shampoo lately.

Yeah, the Everblue Hair Care and Body Range, available at a countdown of $50. That's coming your way, all right? Okay. Oh, that's lovely. Thank you. Good on you. Have a great day being in the medical centre. Jew, we've got Spy next.

Rihanna is officially a billionaire. I'll tell you more next. New Zealand's breakfast. This is Jono and Ben on the head. Morning. Just got 8 o'clock. It is Jono and Ben on New Zealand's breakfast. Now, the Queen.

Now, she loves her corgis, right? We all know about that. Now, she's launched her own range of dog biscuits. The Queen. She's an influencer. Subscribe to her channel. Like and subscribe. So the 95-year-old has got some canine snacks.

They're called Game Bones. I already thought they should have gone with Game of Bones, but anyway, that's just me. The doggy biscuits cost $9.80, but just under $10. They come in a paper bag with a royal seal, and they're kind of for occasional use as a training aid. I thought it was very unusual that the Queen would kind of have some sort of line of merchandise. Launch a product. Yeah. She breeds, she inbreeds her own dogs, much like the royal bloodline.

Yeah. Very tight bloodline. But she's got a doggy. So she's got three dogs, two corgis and one doggy, which is a mix of a d of a dash and a corgi. That's right. So she made her own dog. She's like her own little Jurassic Bark.

She's mutating the animals. But I was actually looking into what the Queen feeds her corgis. And they have their own, which I guess you hear this and go, of course they do. They have their own exclusive menu, her corgis. So one day it would be beef, one day chicken the next day lamb, the next day rabbit and it gets alternated and they get people that people like hunt the stuff that animals

come in, they get prepared all their food gets prepared for them by chefs and they'll cut up and it's all cooked beautifully. I know you're saying this and you're like oh god imagine the queen doing this. You send your dog to a doggy daycare. Yeah no we can't cast judgement on this show. In the South Island, just simultaneously

switching. Only two days a week though, guys. But he gets a report card at the end of the year. He does. What does he get fed there? No, they don't actually feed him. He's a bit boisterous for the daycare, isn't he? He's always bad marks on his report card. He'd be that troublesome toddler that bites all the other kids.

And you're just mortified when you find out that's your child. No, no, just making just a, yeah, just one of those pain. He's not bitey. He's just loud and the centre of attention like me. Hey, next. Mmm, coffee breath. Jono and Ben, the hits. And it's the hits, 8.30 on your Thursday.

What is today's price? Oh, my gosh. OMG. Yes, OMG 011 is back. And today's prize, a GHD Pink Limited Edition gift pack valued at $840. That's pretty awesome if you want to have a good hair day. And literally you'll have a good hair day today because someone, if they text OMG to 4487,

we'll have a GHD and that pink limited edition gift pack delivered this afternoon. Do you know the hair straighteners are also great if you don't have an iron at home? Yes. Oh, really? You can iron your clothes. Yep.

Oh. Creases down your sleeves, mate. Could you make little toasted sandwiches? Tiny little toasted sandwiches. Cook the world's smallest eggs and bacon. Yeah, I don't know if that's actually quite, that's probably a very bad fire risk. Jeez, our toasted sandwich machine here at work, it gets used for everything. Someone cooked steak on it the other day.

Oh, yeah. Steak? Yeah. On a toasted sandwich? Oh, no. In the work kitchen. Yeah, it's an unusual thing. But anyway, the GHD Pink Limited Edition Gift Pack, valued at $840, could be all yours.

Just text OMG to 848, sorry, 4487. Hey, good on you. Didn't fumble through that at all. No, it was seamless, right? Blair Chook. Yeah, I'll edit it up there, mate. We'll tidy that up. Blair Chook and Peter Burling, our medal-winning sailors,

they're going to join us from Tokyo next. It is the hits. You got Jono and Ben. Warning, this show contains traces got Jono and Ben? Morning. This show contains traces of Jono and Ben. The hits with Jono and Ben for breakfast. Of course, the Olympics are going on right now. They're in Tokyo and New Zealand have done so well

over the last couple of weeks. Are we still 11th on the medal table? I think we might have slipped to 12th this morning, but it's still, I mean, we've done. But you're still 11th in my heart. Yeah, we've done so well. And joining us are two more people that have done extremely well for New Zealand.

Their third Olympic medal was won just two days ago in sailing. They are from Team New Zealand as well. Blair Chuuk, Peter Burling, join us from Tokyo. How's it going, guys? Thanks so much for your time. Yeah, thanks. Thanks very much. Yeah, very proud this morning.

I bet you are. Is it punishing having to talk to us? Yeah. All good. Hey, now, so, you know, a day after a medal win now, a lot of the athletes are having to get out of the village pretty quick smart, aren't they?

Lucky or unlucky enough, we've got a couple of days to pack up all our gear this year. We're actually out of Japan on the 7th. Your carry-on must be a nightmare. Yeah, how does it work? Does the boat come over with you? I mean, what happens?

Oh, you try not to take too much on the plane, although we had a little bit of hand luggage on the way up here. We flew up with 10 bags between us all. Just with all our sails and masks and gear. Oh, was it one of those situations where you overpack, you're like, oh, take some cold clothes, I'll take some cold clothes,

I'll take some warm clothes, and then before you know it, you've got 10 bags worth and an entire boat. And you're those annoying people at the front of the line at the check-in going, oh, behind them

with 10 bags of stuff. If anyone could make their own way back to New Zealand, surely it's two sailors. You've got an option. They could have saved on your Air New Zealand flight, guys. Yeah.

No, we're actually not going to be able to bring these medals straight home. We're on our way up to Europe to continue on with our sail GP season. We've got a few weeks off now, or a couple of weeks off now, but not quite enough time to get through MRQ and then back up. So we'll be back in mid-October. Now, so once you win a medal, how long is it between the race finishing and you standing on the podium?

And what happens? What don't we see on TV? Oh, quite a while, actually. I think it's longer than the other times at the Olympics, but I'm not sure. We actually went and cheered on Josh, the other sailor who was racing in the medal race. We went and watched his race.

We had a tail for about three hours. So, yeah, I'm trying to take a sip of the antidote. Oh, right. So they tested you? Oh, they do the drug test straight afterwards, do they? He must have been a bit dehydrated. He couldn't... Oh, really?

I can imagine it's a precious situation, though, isn't it? You sort of have to go when someone's in the room. Everyone's staring at you. Yeah. Do they drug test sailors? You wouldn't imagine drugs would... Oh, yeah, you guys, it's more to do with the wind and the conditions. I mean, obviously, your ability as well, but you're right. You guys are, you guys, it's more to do with the wind and the conditions. I mean, obviously your ability as well,

but you're right. Now, you guys, you know, not your first Olympic medal. It always fascinates me to know, where do you keep your medals? Like, do you have them on display? Are they in a sock drawer? I mean, what happens to your medals?

Well, it varies a little bit, to be honest. Most of the time, they're just tucked away somewhere nice and safe. Oh, you don't wear them around your neck the whole time. I would be... Yeah. You'd have half a neck if you did. Half a cage would be heavy.

Are they really heavy, are they? I'd have a sore neck after about half an hour. Oh, shit. Peter and Blair, we've actually got a very special treat for you. We've actually organised the whole of New Zealand to come into the Hit Studio this morning. And, kids, we want you all to yell...

Congratulations, Peter and Blair! Coincidentally, we've got a school tour party coming through at the moment. That's perfect. I will take it. That's good timing. So now I'm... Ben and me are just sitting in the studio, weirdly, with about 30 children now.

But they wanted to pass on your congratulations. Peter and Blair say, Thanks, kids kids don't give up on your dreams thanks everyone yep thanks everyone i i watched it but probably when we came second there we go some wonderful post analysis there of the race we got 58 points oh now they're just talking amongst themselves. Sorry, guys. We made this awkward. Hey, Peter and Blair, congrats. We're all so proud of you back here. And we just proved it with 30 children yelling congratulations in the studio. Hi.

Hey, hope everything goes well. Safe travels and keep safe over there. All right. Thank you very much, guys. Nice to chat. What more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from sex on The Hits. And via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast.

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