Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: What Is The Longest Line You Have Waited in?

Episode Date: September 13, 2022

Today on the Jono and Ben podcast we chat about the longest line you've ever waited in, we propose our traffic light tour idea and Benson Boone joins us to chat his NZ show!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to a bonus podcast from Jono and Ben on the hits. Kia ora, welcome. It's Jono and Ben here. It's the podcast introduction. 14th of September, Māori Language Week this week. Did you know that today is the day that the petition was handed to Parliament? Oh, like 50 years ago, wasn't it? 50 years ago today. Yeah. 50 years flies by, doesn't it? I'm saying it like I'm...

You've been alive 50 years. But the years I've'm saying it like I'm You've been alive for 50 years But the years I've spent on the earth have flown by And they say it's a cliche But the older you get it feels like the faster they go They just hum along Especially when Like yesterday Just went quick

It's when you've got a lot of stuff on the go too I imagine if Your latter years you're i reckon you're all you're all guns blazing sort of ages between 20 and probably 60 right all guns blazing then you might button off a bit you know and then like yeah kind of take the accelerator off a bit and like the car slows down yeah for a slow painful I don't want to do the slow fade out. Nah. No one wants...

When do you reckon you would retire? If you could pick the age that you would retire. I don't think I want to retire. I don't... Like, yeah. I think having stuff to do, I just think it would be a pain to everyone in my life if I don't have things to do.

Yeah. That's my pain. I'll be like, I want to do this. And they'll be like, oh, give him something to do. Like, make it someone else's problem. So post this. What do you see yourself doing? Post this.

I don't know. I haven't got a post plan for this. Well, you need to get one. Not that I know anything. We both need to get one. But I'll be the person doing stuff. You'll be like, Oh, he does a radio station in his garage.

For the neighborhood. We started a community. How's it broadcast you can kind of hear it in the other houses no one listens but he's doing that he's got little t-shirts made

yeah come on down here does the promos yeah yeah that'd probably be me as well to be honest yeah

because this there's not many skills that are transferable from this job into any other none really like who just needs people talking at them the whole

time no one no one i mean we could do announcements at the like the airport or something but they don't want they don't want banter they just want such and such i want the information the flight has been missing trial yeah no jokes no you know whatever so don't add your own pizzazz to the message it's not the time mate Not the time So yeah I don't know I really don't know A lot of former radio announcers Get into

Car sales Real estate too Yeah real estate Not new cars Oh the used cars Yeah They kind of get into that game Auctioneers

Lots of people that we know The media have got into auctioneers Auctioneering is That pays money man Does it Oh yeah Maybe I'll get into that. But it's a hard, it's a tight-knit group, mate.

They're not letting just any old two-bit schmuck in there, but auctioneering's a good one. Yeah. Go, give me your best auctioneering. Oh, I don't know. Can I get a bid now? I sound like a racing coach. You and Sarah, the sort of picking your nose, you with the beanie.

You bid for $100,000. No, no, $10. $10. I need $100,000. This is a beautiful home in sunny Auckland. Come on, New Zealand. $100,000 house in Auckland. I'll take it.

No, we'll not take it. We've got $100,000 over at the corner. No one else is bidding. Anyone bidding, remember this is a lovely home. You're the guy who used to be on the radio? Yeah, I was. I was. What are you doing?

Looking for something to do. Yeah, so you're like, yeah. What are you doing? I wouldn't be good. I wouldn't be, so you're like, yeah. What are you doing? I wouldn't be good. I wouldn't be good at that. So, yeah. A lot of pressure on auctioneers, too. Yeah.

You actually don't. That's probably why they get paid so much. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It really is. Yeah. If you go to an auction, it's all on them to drive the price up, isn't it?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Totally. It's making everyone feel like, oh, this is. This is pressure. And for some reason, it's just like, God, it panics you in auction, doesn't it? This wouldn't be for me. No.

Oh, no, you might be good at it. You might be good at it. You wouldn't be good with hecklers, though. No, no one heckles. Hey, no one's heckling. Stop. I get more. No.

Yeah. All right. Anyway, had a really fun show today. Benson Boone. Benson Boone. Pop star. Yeah, he's really cool. Like, he's burst onto the music scene.

Was an American idol, decided it wasn't for him, even though they thought he was going to win the show. He did a backflip for us. It was a really fun interview today. Katy Perry said he was going to win Idol. Yeah. He said no. Not for me.

Thanks, but not for me. Who would do that? Now he's an auctioneer. No, he's not, but that'd be a twist. Hey, have a great day. Enjoy the podcast. Damn, Microsoft. Can you please make order correct for audio?

Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, of course, we are at the end of the traffic light system. This week announced the traffic lights, you know, that were in part of the COVID-19 protection framework. That's gone. We lost that, and we've lost the Queen in the last seven days. So it's been a couple of big blows, Ben. You did right, and you wanted to commemorate, and we've lost the Queen in the last seven days. So it's been a couple of big blows, Ben. You did right.

And you wanted to commemorate not only the passing of the Queen. We've kind of done that. Yeah. But you want to commemorate the passing of the traffic light system. Yeah, I do. I want to. You know, send it off. Say goodbye to the traffic light system.

Didn't Jacinda do that on Monday? Oh, she did. She was like, hey, midnight tonight, that's gone. And it felt like a bit like, oh, is that? You know, this was such a big part of our life for so long.

It was, but no one knew what it was or how it worked. At the start, I feel like we all did and then they started messing with it, changed things.

You're like, hang on, I thought I could do that. There's an amber light, but then sometimes when the amber's mixed with the red, it's another scene.

Yeah, I know what you're saying. So anyway, it was a big part of our life and I'm glad we're putting it behind us. But I thought, let's celebrate with that celebrate with a traffic light, the drink. You remember the traffic light drink? You'd go to like Cobb & Co.

You'd go to places like that, and it was the red, orange, green drink you'd have as a kid. Yeah, and you had six of them, and jeez, you were a nightmare until about midnight for both of your parents. So there's a guy in the UK, in Wales, he travelled around 56 pubs in 24 hours.

In fact, it didn't even take him 24 hours, it just took him most of the day. And he's got the world record for the most amount of pubs visited to buy a drink. Wasn't all alcoholic, obviously, because he'd be dead by now. He only had two beers across the day. Let's hope he's not dead by now, though. Unless he'll be still with us.

So 56 pubs to buy a drink over the day. I'm like, well, how about we go 57 pubs across the day and buy a traffic light at each one, and then we'd have this world record, and we'd say goodbye to the traffic light system. You could just go to one and then hold up a traffic light drink and go, there we go. You could, but that'd stimulate the economy.

Feels like a lot of toilet visits. I'm getting my first impressions. Yeah, that's what he said. He said it started maybe one in every 10 bars, and then by the end of it, it was one in every two bars. Yeah, and it feels like a lot of artificial sugar. Just 56 traffic light drinks. Yeah, or 57 if we get to them.

57. Yeah, yes. I've just come off a big takeaway binge. 56 traffic light drinks or 57 if we get to them 57 yeah yes I've just come off a big takeaway binge I did 7 days of BKKFC McDonald's now you wanted me to go out for a day

of sugary drinks it's a lot you're right it is a lot but hey it's just pitching an idea but I'm not even sure that bars

and restaurants make traffic lights are they still a thing Joel producer Joel you go out more than us losers I'm sure you're not

going out on a Friday night and ordering a traffic light. I haven't ordered a traffic light for a while. If anything, us with kids probably don't. I used to work at Lone Star a few years ago and we used to make them. Every six months, some weirdo would come and order a traffic light.

That's us. Yeah, that could be us. That was such a thing of our childhood. A traffic light, you go to the places like that. When an adult orders one, we're a waiter. Are you like weird know, like a traffic light you go to at the places like that. When an adult orders one, you were a waiter. Are you like weirdo like you're saying?

People actually used to do it but they used to get like a vodka alternative as well. So I don't know if you'd want to be doing that. No, maybe not 57 alcohol drinks.

Yeah, maybe not 57 of those but yeah. Yeah, no, that's okay. Well, 4487,

do you know how to make a traffic light? Are they still in the market? More important, like if we're going, yes, Lone Star, that's one. Yeah. Like, your Denny's, Cobb & Co, you'd imagine they're a safe pair of hands.

You're right. Every single bar that's open. Do they even make traffic lights? Would they make a traffic light? There's logistics to get over here, Ben. Hey. But this is all part of the fun. That's right. I mean, Ed Hillary, you know, he had a lot of things to worry about climbing up Everest.

Yeah, he's like, boots, some poor shirt, but he carried all my crap. Yeah, there might be a little, you know, might need a rain jacket, those sorts of things. You know, that's right. These are the logistics you need to work out. But you need the idea first. Yeah, you need your Everest. Enjoy the journey.

This is our Everest. But 4487, traffic lights. Have you made one? Can you make one? Are people still making one? Love to know. On the hits. Jono and Ben, the bold and the beautiful.

On the hits. Note, may not and the beautiful on the hits note may not be beautiful i had an idea we pitched it we put it out there and we're just trying to work out logistically logistically is it even possible yeah ben uh didn't think the prime minister did a good enough job of saying goodbye to the traffic light system on monday he said it was abrupt it came out of nowhere see that midnight this thing ends and it's been such a huge part of his life, all of our lives. For a couple of years now. Well, you know, it feels like the traffic lights. Like the Queen's getting, you know, a big two week bonanza.

Oh, that's great. I'm not trying to, let's not make, it's not a competition with the Queen. She deserves all this. But you want to give this one a bit of a farewell. Yeah. Yeah. So I was like. Something, an acknowledgement.

Acknowledgement that the traffic light system is gone and I'm glad it's gone. But I want to. But before that we had the level system. We didn't do a goodbye to the level system. Oh, well, you're right. And I'm glad it's gone. But before that, we had the level system. We didn't do a goodbye to the level system. No, you're right. We didn't. My idea of doing different levels on the beep test was shunned. But this one, I was like, how about the traffic light, the drink?

So the traffic light drink. And then I looked online. There was a guy who went around 56 pubs in Wales. He visited those pubs over a 24-hour period, got the world record for the most amount of drinks ordered. He didn't order alcoholic drinks, because obviously you couldn't drink that many drinks. He only had two beers, and the rest of it was just like

lemonades and waters and all sorts he was ordering. Oh, so he wasn't even doing traffic lights? No. So he's the world record. Well, if we just went to two establishments and had two traffic lights, we would have the world record for the most amount of traffic lights. I'm sure some kid would have had like four or five in a row,

but you're probably right. But no, let's go to 57 bars around the city in Auckland and order 57 traffic lights. But we're not trying to beat his record.

We are, because we're trying to get the world record. He's got the world record for the most bars. That's what we're trying to beat. We're not making a new traffic light world record.

How many traffic lights do you have? Well, that seems far more obtainable. Yeah, I know. Where'd you go? Three or four places and a three or four traffic lights. I've got the record. The record for the most amount of traffic lights do you have? Well, that seems far more obtainable. Yeah, I know. Where'd you go? Three or four places? I've got the record.

The record for the most amount of traffic lights. That's probably quite true. But I was worried because, you know, not every place makes traffic lights. Well, yeah, we've been having conversations off here. Are they still in market, the traffic light? It had a wonderful era in the 90s, didn't it? Producer Joel, you worked at Lone Star. You still had traffic lights on the menu there?

Pumping them out, mate. Every six weeks, one person would order one. Every six weeks. Every six weeks. Well, they probably faded off the menu there now. So that's a big concern for us, is are they still out there? Can we still order them? And Trish, you're on.

Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. You went to Taupo recently. Yeah, yeah, we did. And we visited Cobham Coast for nostalgia's sake. Nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they have an adult traffic light on the menu there. Oh, adult traffic light.

So this one, I imagine, has got some naughty alcoholic stuff. Yeah, yeah. It's got vodka and I can't remember what else. Looks like your original traffic light with all the layers and the umbrella and the, you know, I think it had a pineapple up that tree. A pineapple. Oh, wow. That was really diversified.

Well, Cobb & Co. was the holy home of the traffic light, wasn't it? Yeah. And still is. Yeah. Totally. And you still get your shrimp cocktail and your cob loaf and your total Cobb & Co. nostalgia. Oh, it is beautiful. Brings back wonderful memories, doesn't it?

Well, Trish, they're there. They are out there. They are. Some alcoholic ones are out there. We could get quite slurry by the end of it. Oh, totally. You know, one other thing. Well, thank you very much for your call, Trish.

Appreciate that. Janine. Hello. How are you? She's in Levin, Ben Live in Levin, La Loca She's live in Levin, La Loca Now apparently you used to work in hospo

You know how to make a traffic light? Yes, yeah It's pretty easy, mate All you need is food colouring and orange juice Okay, well that is good So our concern was Yes, we understand they're not going to be on every menu and every bar, restaurant, whatever we walk into,

but if we threw it to the bartender, they'd be able to whip one up? Yes, well, you've got technology now, so you can just Google it up. So any drinks, you can do that. So even with your shots, there's so many of them. You just ask Siri or Google them up and they're right there. But this was producer B Humps' issue.

He's like, okay, so we're walking in 57 bars. He's like, do we make a traffic light? No, we don't. He's like, oh, we'll get it up on YouTube. Then they have to learn. So he was worried that we were sort of extending our time when we want to be in and out. Tell you what, why don't we write down,

have a little card of what we need to do so we can take in a little menu. So what do you have to do? How do you make a traffic light? Yeah, no, so I just put, I put off first and then a little bit of orange juice and then you put some red food colouring

or red syrup. Yeah. And then you just fill it up a bit more and then you put your green food colouring at the top. So orange juice, a little bit of like

red cordial or food colouring and green food colouring and that's it? Yeah. That sounded easy but to make it look like the colours aren't blending in together

I imagine there's a little bit of a trick. Oh generally if you stir it up which is generally what it looks like, mud. What's going to happen though, it sounds, what you're describing is a buttload of

sugar, times 57 glasses, Ben. Yeah. Oh yeah, definitely. Yeah, so I mean, you can get non-sugar, horrible orange juice you can get, but it's just not the same. But yeah, it's just a novelty, and the kids generally go for it,

not really so much the adults. Right, okay, well, thank you very much. We've got the plan. It can be made. We may even give it a crack after the show today. Thank you so much for your time. You're most welcome. Have a great day.

4487 on the text. This is your show. Should we do this? Should we go out maybe, I don't know, tomorrow and try and order 57 traffic lights and 57 bars over 24 hours? Stimulate the economy but also stimulate a lot of sugar in our system. 4487, tell us if this is a good idea to say goodbye to the traffic light system next. They're not afraid to use the F word.

Be family friendly fun. Jono and Ben on the hits. Megan Puppers from the 3pm Pickup tells us every week what are the shows we should be watching, whether on TV or streaming, and she joins us in the studio right now. Kia ora, good morning, Megan. Hello. What to watch now? I was watching you as you were walking in today.

Yes. You look like you're ready. Do we need to get a towel on the floor? Oh, jeez. I reckon we're good to go I'm ready I'm so ready to have this child out How do you sleep?

Do you just go on your back? No Because it's like a bowling ball on you So you have to sleep on your side Well I was talking to someone And they thought they had an invention Where you would create like a Almost a lilo shaped pillow

And so you can lay face down And you have your belly in the lilo. Oh, that's amazing. Yeah. That'd be great. It's like when you get a massage and there's a hole for your head, you can have a hole for your...

A hole for the pregnancy belly. Now, well, one thing you have been doing a lot of, though, is watching, you love watching shows. You're first to watch all the shows, and that's what we love about this segment. So what are you watching this week? Well, there is one called Dated and Related. It's on Netflix.

If you like Love Island, this is, I like Love Island but there's an episode every day and it's quite a commitment. Right. This is only 10 eps

and it is real trashy. Imagine being swept away to a luxury villa in the south of France. You're there to find love in the most romantic country in the world with other gorgeous singles. Oh, did I not mention the catch? You'll be joined by your brother or sister

who's also looking for love. That sounds like the bleakest television show I have ever heard. It's not like where I grew up in Marston. It's not like they're looking for love within the family. No, no. But it's so awkward

because I don't know about your siblings, but if I went on a date with my brother, oh, that would be horrendous. So they bring the family along as sort of like a... Yeah, so in as a team there's a team of two it's your brother or your sister and they're supposed to be your wingman and help you find love but you end up on going on dates together so there's one where she um where one of the girls went on a date with um twin guys so her brother's just sitting there like listening to her chat up these dudes being like, I don't

actually want to hear this. It's so horrendous, but I can't look away. That's the problem. I mean, when you go on these shows now, you're not even there to find love. You're just like, okay, what's the twist? Like, are we doing it naked? Do we have to do it with lions surrounding us?

Because they all have to have a hook now, don't they? Yeah, there always has to be something different, right? So dated and... Related. Dated and related. Here was my idea. Okay. Now the what that was called, it was for Valentine's Day

and you're on a 100-meter track. Oh, there's a bloody pash dash for cash. I think it's been done or something, isn't it? So every 10 meters there was someone from your life that you had to pash in order to advance through to the next round. So you start with, I don't know, your boss. Oh, God.

The 10-metre line. And it advances all the way through to your grandmother or something. Yeah, right. No? Not for me. I mean, I'd watch it. But you need a lot of consenting people To be on board that show

The boss might go Well I'm already married I've got a husband It doesn't matter mate You put it on there This person can win some money It requires a lot of buy in From a lot of people

Now Severance is the next show Yes So this is on Apple TV It came out The final episode came out in April. So it's not new, but Joel that works on your show has actually been absolutely addicted to it. Yeah, he's like, you need to get onto the show. Here's a wee snippet.

My name is Mark S. And I have, of my own free accord, elected to undergo the procedure known as severance. I give consent to sever my memories between my work life and my personal life that is genius so what so you manage to sort of compartmentalize your work and your home memories they don't kind of exactly that so um it sounds great in theory but the um person they call them innies, the people who are inside, they don't have any concept of who they are on the outside. All they experience in a day is coming out of the lift and going to work.

So they don't know who they are. They don't know about their families. And then on the flip side, the outies don't know how they're being treated or what they're actually doing when they go to work. Ah. So if Jotter came around and he'd be like, hey, I'm from work, and I'd be like, what? Who? Yeah. I wouldn't know. You wouldn't know how they're being treated or what they're actually doing when they go to work. Ah. So if Jono came round and he'd be like, hey, I'm from work, and I'd be like, what, who? Yeah.

I wouldn't know who. You wouldn't know who they were. Oh, so awkward work Christmas parties kind of thing. Yeah. Well, they're kind of half of one half of you, but not your other half. And it sounds pretty basic, but it goes down a twisted path. It's directed by Ben Stiller,

and it was nominated for like 14 Emmys this year. It's so interesting where it goes and the cliffhanger is intense and it's actually just been renewed for a season two. Wow, there's severance. It's a good idea. We all play some sort of role

on the radio, don't we? Yeah. We're not the same people. I'm boring out there. I don't know why I'm probably boring're not the same people. I'm boring out there. I don't know why I'm probably boring in here too, but I'm more boring out there. Yeah, no, that's interesting. Severance, where do you get Severance? Apple TV.

Apple TV. Yeah. Yeah, all right, there we go. Megan, what to watch. Thank you very much. Thank you. Warning, this show contains Jono and Orban. Jono and Ben on The Hits.

We're going to talk about the longest time you've waited for something on 0800 The Hits or 4487 because the Queen's coffin has arrived in London just this morning, just arrived now, and there are many people lining up already. They reckon there's going to be like a million people over the next few days prepared to wait hours and hours and hours to pay their respects to the Queen. And we've got an expat on the phone right now. Her name's Kim. How are you?

Yeah, good, thanks. How are you? Yeah, good, thanks. How are you? Lovely to have you on. Geez, what have we got you on? Are you running through a WhatsApp over there or something? Yeah, yeah. Calling through a WhatsApp. Cheapest way, isn't it?

Crystal, crystal clear quality. Now, Kim, you are going to wait in line when the Queen arrives in London. Now, bearing in mind we've heard reports of waiting over 10 hours in Edinburgh, Scotland. Yeah, yeah. Some people call me crazy. So how long do you think it's going to take over there? Like, how long are you going to be prepared to wait in line for? Well, from what we've heard, the minimum wait time is going to be about eight hours,

with the maximum up to sort of 27 to 30 hours. That is a huge window. That is a huge window. Too big. Too big. Eight to 27 hours. So you're willing to wait over 24 hours to see essentially a wooden box. So over there in the UK, have people started lining up already? Do you know if there are crowds forming to pay their respects?

Yeah, definitely. As far as we've heard, people started queuing from yesterday afternoon. The Queen obviously arrives there at 5 p.m. tomorrow, so English time. So, yeah, there's been people queuing since yesterday afternoon through the rain all day today, and I guess they're going to wait all day tomorrow as well. So they've been already 24 hours or so waiting in line.

And I understand it's like if a Queen or a Royal was coming along to kiss some babies, do some waving get some flowers, shake some hands and stuff, but there's not much action, like Ben was saying before Seven, it was kind of like you wait for a ride at Disneyland there's a payoff but you're paying your respects

which obviously is a bit more than it means a lot more than riding a rollercoaster in a theme park, you know the years of service 70 years if you're a royal fan I mean this is paying your, the years of service, 70 years if you're a Royal fan, I mean, this is paying your respects. This is a small thing to do if you're a Royal fan to what she has done, I guess, in their minds. So what will you bring along?

Can you bring along flowers or something there, Kim? No, they're actually being really strict on it when you actually go in. So I think you can't even take a bag or food. I think you're allowed to take like a really small handbag. Everything else is like airport security checked. You're constantly moving you're allowed to take like a really small handbag everything else is like airport security checked you're constantly moving not allowed to take seats or sleeping bags or anything so you've got to stand in that queue that entire time and then walk on through with no food i think you're allowed to take food for the queue oh you give it all up at the door yeah right what i suppose they do have to have strict protocols not like they'll be selling hot dogs and stuff yeah exactly what is it like

how many bathrooms are going to be there well that's busy already like what's it like over there are there people lining the streets everywhere they're a queen we see on the news there are thousands of people of flowers everywhere pictures of the queen it must be just a surreal time to be in the UK. It really is. You can definitely feel it. There's so many more people in the city at the moment. There's queues all the way down Pall Mall and Buckingham Palace.

They've had to put an official warning out to not take marmalade sandwiches down because it'll set the wildlife off. Because I think a few people were dropping them off for her. Oh, because she loves marmalade sandwiches. The Paddington Beth, yeah. The sketches, well, yeah, a her. Oh, because she loves marmalade sandwiches. And the Paddington Beth. The sketches. Yeah, a nightmare.

It would be a nightmare for ants as well. Bring them all in. Yeah. Well, that's amazing. Can I just say you have the most wonderfully quaint British accent, Kim? Oh, yeah. Well, I got stuck in the country over quarantine, didn't I? No.

Yeah, I've been here about eight years now, so it's rubbed off on me a little bit. Oh, amen. I went over there. How long were you over there for? Been about four days's rubbed off on me a little bit. Oh, amen. I went over there. How long were you over there for? We were in about four days, so I came back with a, G'day, Governor, how are you? Oh, that's pretty close, that. Oh, that's incredible.

Well, good on you for paying your respects to the Queen, and they reckon over a million people will be walking through. Yeah, I think it'll be at least that. I think it's one of those things that it's the first time it's ever happened for our generation, so quite a few want to uh be a part of that experience i guess well we'll keep in touch with you kim uh when you're in the line yeah absolutely i'll check in yeah we'll we'll do it like hourly updates you're still here if you're moved yeah well i'm worried about your cell phone battery too that's gonna run out pretty quickly so don't you worry

i'll have a couple of portable chargers with me. Oh, good. Yeah, good on you. She's got it sorted. All right, Kim, well, you keep safe and good luck getting into that line. We'll be in touch in a day or two. Thanks so much, John and Ben. Take care.

All right. Well, 0800 the hits, 4487. What's the longest time that you've waited in a line to see something, see someone, to wait for a concert, wait for tickets? Love to hear from you this morning. 0800 HITS is our phone number. We'll find some hell pizza for a couple of our favourite calls next. Rated M for mildly amusing.

Jono and Ben on the hits. Just talking about how long you've had to wait in line. Had Kim on the phone, New Zealander living in London, who's going to wait to pay her respects to the Queen. But they're talking up to 27 hours of wait time. Phenomenal stuff, isn't it? So we're just talking about the longest lines this morning. Conga lines, washing lines, white lines, the ones on the rugby fields,

whatever you got. 0800, that hits the telephone number. The longest you've waited for something, Ben? Oh, look, probably go to a theme park. Disneyland, waited a long time at one time i waited we waited a couple hours to go on the pirates of the caribbean line and then and then unfortunately the thing kind of stopped you know at some stage and the lights came on and all that so we had to get off and go out the back through the alleyways of disneyland what's it's

just as magical out the back it's not quite as magical out the back i mean this happens it was fine but you don't duck suck it on a gasper in his morning tea break quite as magical out the back? Well, it's not quite as magical out the back. I mean, this happens. It was fine. Donald Duck sucking on a gasper in his morning tea break? Not quite as magical. But we were like, hey, we should go back. And we haven't finished that ride. So we went back later, waited, I think, another hour to go on the ride. And then we realized we were just one corner away from the end. So we did spend about three hours waiting for the ride that we'd pretty much done anyway.

So 800, that's the longest lines this morning. Philippa, welcome to the show. Whereabouts are you calling from? From in the Wairarapa, the mighty Wairarapa. Oh, what a Ben Boyce. Wairarapa, yeah, yeah, love it, love it. Do they still talk about the great Ben Boyce around the region?

You don't need to answer that. Your laugh said it all. Okay. Hey, Philippa, longest line. What was it for you? Oh, my gosh, Vodafone. Yeah, oh, my goodness me. I waited, I waited.

I've got snapshot two of my phone calls that I had with them. I think I stayed on one call for about three and a half hours or something. It was crazy. Oh, on hold. On hold. Well, yeah, there was a time, telecommunications, airlines, you know, the tax, you do have to wait sometimes from time to time. Now, geez, you must have gone through the entire back catalogue

of middle-of-the-road New Zealand hold music. Oh, gosh, yeah. Oh, it's crazy. Yeah, you must have had it all, must have had it all. And so what did you say after three and a half hours? The first thing you say to the phone operator? Oh, my God. I couldn't tell.

I can't remember. Sorry. Were you spending the whole time swearing on hold and going, there's God. You get wild and wild and wild and it just builds up. But then it catches you by surprise when they suddenly answer. You're like, oh, oh. I know.

I'm like, oh, sorry. I'm a real person. Yeah. And then you're like, oh, oh. I know. It's like, oh my gosh. Sorry, a real person? Yeah. And then you're like, hi. Yeah. Now, what was I ringing you about? Yeah, that's great. I got one of my girls, the daughters, to be on hold the other day.

It was like, same thing. I just put it on speakerphone. I went, hey, can you just keep an eye on this? Let me know when someone answers. That was a great play. Then I went off, did some jobs around the house, did some things. They came back to me 20 minutes later and go, oh, someone's on the phone for you. That would be

that's a good business, Scott. Philippa, I think Ben's just come up with a great business called Hold Me. And so what you do when people need to phone somewhere where they're like, this is going to take hours, you palm it off to us. We sit there on hold for you. When they come through, we patch you back. Patch you through. That'd be good. That's a great idea.

So Hold Me is just this business where they're on hold for 300 different things. And we've got to be across them all, obviously. Exactly. Oh, Spark's answered. Transparency to Spark. Who's that one? Hang on, Land Revenue. We'll get you back over to Karen.

Yeah, no, that's a good idea. Thank you very much for your call, Philippa. My pleasure. Have a great day. Yeah, we come up with all these ideas on the radio, but there's no follow through. I'm not going to follow through on Hold Me. No. Let's get LaSalle on from the Waikato.

Morena, LaSalle, longest line, what was it for you? I waited 10 hours to go to a Billy Joel concert. So we waited from 9 o'clock in the morning until, well, the concert only started at 7. However, the good thing was right about half an hour or so before the show, people came around and they gave some Golden Circle tickets to the first 30 people or so like that. And it was amazing. I was literally in the front row.

I just had normal general admission tickets. That's kind. Like Willy Wonka, he came out with the Golden T tickets. That's kind of like Willy Wonka. He came out with the golden ticket. That's amazing. Are you going to go see Billy Joel

when he comes here? I'm hoping I can. I'm a huge fan. But yeah, that was a long way but it was actually worth the wait. Well, yeah,

you got the upgrade, the Billy Joel upgrade. He's not cheap. $2.99 for your cheapest ticket at Eden Park. I really wanted to go. I was trying to get

my dad to buy tickets to go with me but he was like, oh, it's expensive Eden Park. I really wanted to go. I was trying to get my dad to buy tickets to go with me, but he was like, oh, it's expensive. Yeah. You're like, yeah, I know. That's why I'm asking you to come up and pay for it. I was like, mate, you and me, go to Billy Joel. The most expensive ticket you can buy is $3,500.

$3,500? Oh, my word. You must have been in that seat, LaSalle. Probably. Probably. I don't know. I just had, look, it was quite expensive anyway to go. And yeah, so it was great.

Oh, well. Fantastic. There you go, Billie. That's what happens when you're one of those weird people who waits in line outside a concert all day. You get into the front row. Hey, thank you very much for listening, LaSalle. Appreciate it.

Okay, bye. An inseparable duo. Unless I'm on better server. He's just going to replace me with Lee Hart and or Ford Smith Jono and Ben on the hits Scrolling through your feed Alright, he's here to news And when we news, we news hard

News on 3, 1, 2, 3 News Now the Royal Coffin, the Queen's Coffin Has been taken from Scotland to London Arriving about 6 o'clock this morning And it's been driven to Buckingham Palace It's been witnessed by Buckingham Palace. It's been witnessed by the King and Queen Consulate.

And people are lining up to pay their respects. People have been paying their respects in Scotland. They could see the Queen. Close cast it, obviously. But one lady had seven times, waited 10 hours and went around seven times to see the Queen. So she waited 70 hours? 70 hours, pretty much. But what do you like?

You go around and there's no disrespect to the Queen, but you're just looking at a wooden box. You feel like you could. I mean, it's lovely. You're right. It's lovely for someone to pay respect. One of the comments I saw on the internet was like, it's not like a theme park ride.

And if it is, it's the most depressing one when you get to the actual ride. They reckon it could take anywhere up to 20 hours to pay your respects in London. They're expecting up to pretty much a million people that could be paying your respects as well for the Queen. How many? Up to a million people could go through over the next few days. I'm just watching live now. It's being driven to the Air Force plane to be

transported to London. No wonder it's taking so long. The car travels at about 7km an hour. Tell the guy to just pick up pace just a little bit. I noticed in Scotland speaking of which crowds were gathering and the Royal Family were walking through the streets and a protester

was yelling out to Hansy Andy. Oh, really? Yeah, he was yelling out, you're a sick old man. And he got arrested. He got arrested? The protester, really? Andrew didn't get arrested. Yeah.

He got arrested. I found it sort of unusual as well because Harry is not allowed to wear his military kit because he's not part of the royals. But Andrew, he's got... So I was like oh anyway I'm sure they've got

a lot to deal with at the moment I mean what people are dressed in is probably the least of their worries do you know my favourite part about the protest

too is he's being familiar he's Scottish the protester and he yells out this as he's being arrested so he's been thrown on the

ground by the police and he yells this out disgusting disgusting police and he yells this out. Disgusting! Disgusting! Don't you love it when a Scottish person yells out disgusting? Disgusting. There's a wonderful viral video of those girls singing Cheryl Cole and the mum comes in and they've left something in the toilet and haven't disposed of it.

And that's what they say. It's disgusting! And the Emmys were on yesterday. Unfortunately, Kiwi actress Melanie Linsky lost out for her lead actress award. But great to be nominated. I mean, pretty impressive. Succession, The White Lotus and Ted Lasso were the big winners yesterday. And Jennifer Coolidge, you'll know her from The White Lotus.

She was in American Pie, Stifler's Mum. Now, when you do a speech, you know, she was stoked to win her first Emmy. You know, they start playing the orchestra music to wrap you up. That's a sign you wrap up. But she was like, uh-uh, I'm not going to wrap up. And she ended and turned up, started dancing on stage as well. Just turned into a bit of a dance party. Have a listen.

Orsi and Nora Skinner, and thank you to my amazing team. Wait, hold on. No, this is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, and I'm full. I'm full. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Wait. Jacob Fenton, my UTA, and Jonathan Weinstein,

and Tiffany Cousin at Mosaic, and my sister is here tonight. And wait, hold on. Wait, hold on. They put the drumbeat in. They pick up the pace. She's sort of like, hang on, hang on. And then she just starts. The crowd will

crack it up. That's great. I mean, what happens if you do keep talking over that? Do they get snipers? The orchestra can't go any faster than that, can they? Oh, that's wonderful. Good on her. They've got pranks. They've got puns. Now they just need some actual

listeners. Jono and Ben on the hits. Queen's Coffin has arrived in London. Thousands of people outside already paying their respects. It's going to be a long and arduous wait for people that want to pay their respects over the next couple of days. They reckon anywhere between 8 to 30 hours is how long some people are going to be waiting over there.

One lady in Scotland, we were talking about earlier this morning, seven times she went round. When it was a 10-hour wait in Scotland, wasn't it? So she waited 70 hours to see the Queen seven times over. Seven times, to pay her respects as well. I said before, we're sending over three Sindhis. New Zealand's sending three Sindhis to the funeral. Only a small number from each country allowed to bring people over,

bringing obviously Jacinda Ardern. There's a whole lot of people, Dame Kiri Te Kanawa, Willie Apiata and people like that, but there's three Sindhies. Jacinda Ardern, Governor-General Dame Cindy Kero and Jacinda Amy as well, who received the New Zealand cross for helping someone to safety in 1992.

I didn't even know we had three Sindhies in New Zealand. We've sent them all over there. Our finest Sindhies on display. It's always good for a bit of chat in the room, you know. Do you know I was looking into uh mourning just obviously with the queen passing and there were ways that people do do it all over the world different ways of mourning some people do it really beautifully maori culture does it beautifully don't they yeah uh but in china there are professional mourners so they're paid to turn up to your funeral and put on a bit of a scene.

Start crying, singing. They grab the microphone. They make a bit of an emotional scene. This is the sort of person I want to employ for my funeral. I want some pizzazz. I want some, you know me, Ben. Even in the afterlife, I still want it to be all about me. Well, it is all about you.

It's the one day that is all about you. Yeah, true. But I want it to be like, oh, jeez, everyone was so sad. So I'll chuck a couple of these in the crowd. This is a lady mourning at a funeral. My son, So she doesn't even know the person. She doesn't know the person.

So she's doing like, it's almost like a dramatical performance from a musical. Exactly what I want. All that showbiz and pizzazz. So they paid quite a bit of money. Every day't know the person. So she's doing like it's almost like a dramatical performance from a musical. Exactly what I want. All that showbiz and pizzazz. So they pay quite a bit of money. Every day they're doing it through China. Incredible. There's other jobs out there. You mentioned one yesterday. A guy who was paid

every day to just go and do things for people like wave at them on the train when they leave. Yeah, that's in Japan. He's just like a companion. People pay him to be a companion. Someone paid him to ride a to go down to the park and jump on a seesaw with him. As you said before, someone paid him to just wave, you know, as we're leaving on a train ride. He drew the line.

I love it. He drew the line at not. He wouldn't move a fridge for someone. He wouldn't move a fridge. And no hanky-panky was his other line. Two lines. Two lines. You're not making love near a fridge, that's for sure.

Other job here that I was looking at, train pusher. In Japan, so many people, huge population, that they all just want to cram them onto the train. Same train this guy's waving at. And there's people who literally shove, like the train's full. It's like when you're trying to put clothes into an overcrowded suitcase. They're shoving people through the door, trying to get door shut that's their that's their full-time job the train busher they should employ some ex-rugby players and stuff you know just to get down drive

drive them but into the into the they also also double up as a health and safety officer i think as well cramming people do another great job here the full--time Netflix viewer. Netflix pay people to sit down and watch every bit of content on Netflix to make sure that it's rated properly, subtitled properly. Lockdown, we were all full-time Netflix viewers. Yeah, all right. We all had that gig. Oh, 800 the hits, 4487. Oh, jobs.

Did you have a job? Or are you doing a job? That we would go, oh, really? That's an actual thing. Numeracy, literacy, and idiocy. They've nailed one of those things. Jono and Ben on the hits. We're talking odd jobs this morning and Marco joins us

in 0800 The Hits. I understand, Marco, you had an odd job in Korea. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Been there, done that. You have. Do you have? Now, what was the odd job? Well, originally it was for my ex-boss, who I used to work in Korea for him.

He asked me if I wanted to teach him English. And I said, yeah, no problem. So anyway, he started to get into gambling at the casino. And so I had to teach him English in the casino while he was gambling. How often was he gambling that he couldn't set aside some time to learn English? Was he there? Literally all day, all day. Wow.

He's like, Ben, it's time to put the kids up from school, mate. He's like, oh, mate, just one more. I'm just in a hole. I'll just pull my way out of this. Well, he was pretty loaded, so this lasted like six months. So eventually he said, look, this jackpot's coming up on the machine, so he gave me a bunch of coins to start gambling. That eventually turned into just full-time gambling.

We were in there. I was in there for three days once, and then came then came out i didn't even know what day it was you didn't leave the casino for three days three days yeah we ate we slept where did you sleep oh just on the um on the in the kitchen canteen area what with your head on the table or something? Head on the table, head on the table. Three days. So sometimes I fell asleep actually sitting in the machine. So what, did you not want to leave in case the jackpot went or something? Yes, that's right, yeah, because we'd only sort of start gambling

when there was a jackpot coming up. And then we'd both sit on one of the machines, I don't know, 10 or something machines, and we'd just go for it. And at the one of the machines I don't know 10 or something machines and we just go for it and at the end of the day we came out we definitely didn't lose any money this is a great advert for gambling this is a great like you know

stick it out there sleep at the casino eventually you'll ever win well we wouldn't recommend it unless you are loaded already so how much money would you have spent well obviously you've. Yeah, so how much money would you have spent? Well, obviously you've made some money, but how much money would you have spent, really? Well, for example, if a jackpot was $10,000, we'd probably spent about $6,000 on it. And that was just for, it could be a few hours to, as I said before, a few days.

$4,000 for a few days is all right. And you're also teaching them English as you go as well, so's got multitasking multitasking multitasking yeah so did you get the jackpot a couple times oh lots of times not a couple of times lots of times yeah well one a week just about in total how much money did you win for the this is like oceans 11 how much like how many times did you win the jackpot oh Oh, a dozen times. Jeez. And so would he pay you to do this for him? Yes.

I also was on a salary, which was my base salary, a car, and an apartment. What, to just gamble for this guy? Well, it wasn't really for gambling. It was officially teaching him English. Of course. Yeah, yeah. Sorry, English. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What a job. Yeah. Yeah, it was a weird, weird job. What's the... Weirdest job of my life. Yeah, that's right. Do you get annual leave? You get some time off?

No, no. Well, it wasn't supposed to be that long, just for a few months until I found myself a normal job. But there was no time to look for a job, so I just ended up dragging on for six months. There we go, got paid to gamble. And I got a cut of the winnings too. Oh, wow, like as a salary bonus. Yeah, bonus as well, yeah.

Marco, that is incredible. Thank you very much for your time, mate. All right, mate. No worries. A-grade celebrity chat with C-grade celebrity hosts. Jono and Ben on the hits. He's coming to New Zealand October 2nd, turning fork in Auckland.

And we caught up with Benson Boone yesterday over Zoom. What up, boys? What up, Benson? I like it. You've come with a lot of energy. Nice to talk to you. Hey, nice to talk to you guys. Now, I'm always interested to know what room we're in here.

Where are we in Benson's house? I'm just in, I just call it the room. It's just the room. Yeah. I've got like a little air mattress in here instead of a couch because my couch broke. I got it at Ikea and apparently Ikea, you can't do backflips on their couches. Oh, a backflip. So hold on, mate.

You're a bloody international superstar. You've got an airbed for a couch? Yeah. You're saying all the right things here. You said you did a backflip, but now you're a diver through high school. Is that still something you can do quite well? Yeah, I do backflips literally probably every day at least once can we see one don't make it we see one he's broken a couch no here we go we're gonna see backflip

let's go mate oh jesus this could end horribly wrong why have you made him do this here we go this is benson benson kevin we got a fan behind you this is all like a little fan in the ceiling. Let's go, buddy. Listen, we have interviewed a lot of people, and none of them have done backflips for us. That is incredible. That's amazing. Well, Benson, I was reading Frontier Touring. We got the press release. They say they're pumped to have you coming to New Zealand,

Australia, New Zealand. Are you pumped? I am absolutely beyond pumped. I actually have two of my best friends there right now. They've been telling me to dream. I really hope I can stay there. Oh, listen, we can sneak you into the country, mate. You don't need a work visa.

We'll keep you here. You can stay out. You can sleep on my earpiece. Oh, that's honestly probably better it feels like we're getting to know you here in new zealand and looking into what you've done you've already achieved so much but one of the big things you went on american idol katie perry was like this guy could win the competition and then you decided not for me why was that you know when i was on the show and don't get me wrong like i had a was on the show, and don't get me wrong, like, I had a blast on the show. Everyone was great.

The judges were great, producers, all of it. But, you know, I kind of felt like everyone that was there, it was like a big dream of theirs to be there. And to me, like, I had only been singing for a year. It wasn't really necessarily, like, my biggest goal to be a singer. And so I just kind of didn't know if I was there for the right reasons. So I stepped away from the show so that I could figure that out on my own. And if I was going to be a musician, then I would just break myself as an artist instead of taking a step in a

direction that I'm unsure of. This is a big call to make. It definitely was very scary to step away, and I didn't know what I wanted to do and how it was going to work and if it was going to work. But after I stepped away, I guess destiny took its course, and Dan Reynolds from Imagine Dragons reached out to me the week after, and he was like, hey, I would love to write music with you

and see kind of what your vibe is, So you should come to Vegas and write. And I was like, did you believe that at first that that's the guy from imagine dragons reaching out to you and going, Hey, no, I could not believe it. And he has so many hits.

It is unbelievable. Like imagine dragons is huge. Um, but he is the nicest human being ever. Like he truly cares about everyone and just like makes you feel like you're the most important person in the world and it's a great feeling to be in his presence so i'm i'm so glad that he reached out we're talking to benson boone he's coming to new zealand uh playing at the churning fork it's going to be awesome now i don't know if you've heard of mills and boone

they write sort of adult uh you know erotic fiction And so I wanted to play a quick game. You're quite young. It was kind of the closest thing to pornography we had. We had to read porn. Back in our day, mate. So what I wanted to do, I wanted to read out a line. You tell me if it's from Benson Boone, yourself, from a song, or from Mills and Boone, from a novel.

Okay? Here we go. Our bodies, our bodies interlaced so delicately played so delicately placed that's me that's you that's you i was gonna pick it was from the erotic novel work of art work of art benson boone there you go okay anything you desire i'm ready willing and able as the host pipe said to the fire is that b Benson Boone or Mills and Boone? That's Mills. Champagne Mills and Boone.

That's the sort of stuff that gets me hot and steamy. Okay. It's dark. It's cold. If my hand is not the one you're meant to hold. That's Benson Boone. That's Benson Boone. Okay.

It's good you can remember the lyrics you've written, or else this game would be, yeah, I'd be quite concerned if you couldn't. I would too. Okay. The sexy stubble and those deeply intelligent looking eyes he really added an extra something to my daily commute is that from you or is that from that was from benson okay and one last one oh it hurts but it. It hurts so good because the best kind of love scars deep. That's me, though. That's you. Take it out of context.

You could be writing for a Mills and Boone. I know. When you said the first one, it took me a little bit. I was like, oh, that's a sexy line. What's a sexy line? You're a sexy guy. Oh, Benson, mate, it's been very fun hanging out with you. You seem like such a great dude.

Good luck for everything, and well done on all the success so far. We can't wait to see you in New Zealand. Thank you so much, Jono and Ben. I can't wait to be there, and I'll have to update you how my trip was. That's very cool, isn't he? Benson Bowen, catch him in October 2nd, tuning for Auckland. To Hollywood producers on the search for future stars. Keep searching, there's nothing here.

Jono and Ben on the hits. I went to the food court yesterday. Being crowded, it's usually a crowded place, isn't it? Love a food court. Just got everything that can cater for everyone. No matter who's at the table, everyone sort of scatters off, goes to their preferred location, returns with their meal. Yeah.

And I was sitting there on the phone. Ding. It's an airdrop. Someone's trying to airdrop me something. Okay? I don't recognise the number. Oh. I don't recognise anything.

What do you do? Well, I tell you what, you feel like you're in the middle of one of those sort of suspense thriller movies. You know, when the camera does the 360 around the character and music's going. Because you're looking around going, who's trying to, is this a mistake or is this a genuine sort of i've never had it before nothing unsettles you more than an air dropping coming from a number you don't recognize yeah and you're not sure it's like it's someone ringing the doorbell and running off because then you look around and you don't know who sent it you're trying to look and see if anyone's like smiling or nodding or you're getting no reaction getting nothing it's like the technology equivalent of

someone tapping you on the shoulder and then you know how you duck behind them so they can't see you and that's the one yeah i did it once by mistake i have i've taken a like i think it was a movie premiere or something we're all there and i when my wife and i'd taken a photo outside and and then she was oh can you send me that photo so i went to a photo outside, and then she was like, oh, can you send me that photo? So I went to airdrop it. And then Vaughn from ZM's airdrop popped up just at my top option around my area, and I sent Click thinking it was Amanda, my wife. Next thing you know, I'm sending Vaughn from ZM a lovely photo of me and my wife.

He's like, you can see him get the photo and then look back. Like, why have you sent me this? It really does throw you. It throws you because then you're like, do I open this? It's like a jack-in-the-box that's going to pop out and scare you. What's the joke here? Why is this lovely photo? I'm like, no joke, mate.

I just thought you'd like this photo. So I was like, well, I better open it. Maybe someone's sending a gag or, you know, a shot of their genitals or something. That's what people do now. I opened it up and someone took a photo of their pad tie. You're like, oh, that looks something. What was it? That's what people do now. I have another son who took a photo of their pad thai. You're like, oh, that looks good. I was like, yeah.

I'm kind of looking around, kind of holding the phone up, trying to acknowledge whoever it came from. That looks delicious. Baldly going where no show has gone before. How long is it going to take for Ben to make fun of my bald head? Jono and Ben on the hits. It's early in the morning and it's time for big news. Small town, town, town, as we always say.

Just because the town's small doesn't mean the news is. And this is the stuff mainstream media, they're too scared to touch Ben. Or they just don't care about it. Yeah, well now we love a novelty marathon on the show. Jono, a few months ago you ran a marathon outside the Sky Tower. About 300 metres in the air. You're running around the outside, around and around the Skytower. That was a novelty marathon.

We loved it. Well, you loved it less than me, but it was an amazing effort. You're right. And Glenn joins us from Dunedin. You're the marathon runner. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Done a couple before. Now as one novelty marathon runner to another, I was forced by my friend Ben

here to run a marathon unprepared, no training, on top of the Sky Tower and hated every minute of it to be honest Glenn so you've done it multiple times though. Yeah yeah I've done a few before so did another one at the weekend.

Yeah so the one at the weekend that you ran down south, you ran in a novelty-sized beer can, like a whole costume surrounded in a can. Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally in a can. So made the can up myself out of skeleton of wood, put some core flute around the outside and got some sign writing on it and attempted to run a marathon.

So was running a marathon not inconvenient enough for you? You needed to make it more inconvenient? Well, it was something a bit quirky and I'd done a few before, so it was never going to be a fast time. So I thought this would be a good idea. Sorry, at some stage I understand the winds got up and you may have got blown over? Yeah, the wind gradually built during the day and going along Portsmouth Drive, got

a side wind and it sort of just toppled me over and I was like a turtle on my back. I was finding it difficult to get out of the can. I imagine quite a lot of wind resistance too when you're rutting head on. Yeah, very much so. I made it for a bit of a slog in places. However, I knocked it out. You just feel like you've done marathons. That's a great achievement on its own.

And then you see articles of people like you and people running them in high heels and on pogo sticks and things. Do you get bored of just running? Yeah, it's nice to mix it up a wee bit and challenge yourself. What branding did you have on the outside of the can? It was Emerson's Super Quench beer. Oh, okay, so the beer. Did you get free beers?

Surely you get some free beers from this, Glenn. Well, not yet. Unfortunately, I had to head away straight after the marathon, but I'm hoping to pop into Emerson's and have a meal and BS during the week. Oh, I think you deserve it. Where did you have to go directly after? Like, if I'm doing a marathon, that's the only thing I'm doing that day.

Where did you have to go directly after? I just got roped into a family appointment, which I had to go to, unfortunately. So, yeah yeah these things that you got to do i'll just finish a quick marathon first i'll be over for the family you're running late mate you know i'm literally running in a beer can costume i'll get there when i can glenn that's very impressive so in total how many marathons have you run now i've done like 15 to need in once and um just grinding it out grinding it out it out. To the finish, yeah.

Yeah, we're all bloody grinding it out to the finish, Glenn. Some of us are doing it in marathons and others are just doing it in life. Oh, Glenn, well, congratulations on your can-do, pun intended, attitude. Really, really impressive effort. Lovely to talk to you. Yeah, good on you.

Cheers, man. It's Jono and Ben, but FYI, Ben is open to other options. Jono and Ben on the hits. Yesterday we had Jessie from the office in the studio. She had just returned from a birthday surprise trip put on by her partner. Yeah, so we hopped on the plane. And you still didn't know where you were going?

Still didn't know. Oh, well, I knew we were flying to Christchurch. Okay, Christchurch. Love Christchurch. You can drive to Queenstown from Christchurch. Hamlet Springs is up the road. A lot of the vineyards out there. Oh, lovely spot.

So we started driving and like you said, Ben, I thought we were going to Hamlet Springs. Love Hamlet Springs. New water park. But then we kept driving and I was like, oh no, we're going too far. And so where did you end up? On the West Coast. Greymouth. Greymouth. Yeah. Now, we love Greymouth. We're going too far And so where did you end up? On the west coast Grey mouth Grey mouth Yeah

Now We love grey mouth Like if I had the choice Between Rarotonga and grey mouth I'm picking grey mouth Every time Are you? Every time I can't get a flight

To Rarotonga I'm going to grey mouth Grey mouth is Yeah lovely west coast Or wild Yeah wild west But it wasn't what Jessie kind of imagined

She was imagining Sun Soaked beaches You know Fiji That sort of imagined. She was imagining sun, soaked beaches, you know, Fiji, that sort of stuff. So it was a little bit of an underwhelming surprise. But she had to keep up appearances. And that's what you need to do because you never want to appear spoiled or ungrateful. But that's exactly what you would be, deep down. And we had a few calls come through with underwhelming surprises.

Vicky? Vicky, what happened with you and your ex? I'd done a couple of helicopter lessons and he'd been up in a glider. And he says to me, the glider was amazing. He says, I'll gift you to go up in a glider one day. So I was like, oh, OK. Very neat. And then my birthday's coming up and he said, oh, I've got a surprise for your birthday.

So I was like, oh, a surprise. That sounds good. Here's the glider. It's the glider. It's gliding in. So what was the thing? Where did you end up going? We pull up at the gondola.

So we get there, we pull up, and I say, oh, we're at the gondola. And then the gondola was shut. Why does it sound like we're in a hall, Producer Joel? We all stuck with it for probably way too long. What was going on there? Anyway, that was Vicky's underwhelming surprise. So we want to open this up again on 0800THEHITS. 4487 on the text.

What have you got? Have you been given a gift and everyone's like, you're going to love this, and then you have to be... Yeah, I mentioned many work presents, awkward morning teas at work, underwhelming surprises will be handed over. Definitely. All right.

Underwhelming surprises. 0800 the hits. 4487. What have you got for us next? It is the hits. With a long and extinguished career. Jono and Ben on the hits. We're talking underwhelming surprises this morning

when you've been given a gift and it's not quite what you had in your mind. Caitlin, with us first thing on a winter day A, what was your underwhelming surprise? Hi. So when I was in my final year of intermediate school, so I was about to turn 13, all my friends had phones, and so they had iPhones, really fancy stuff, Snapchatting, all that. The iPhone rose gold. It just come out.

And I was saying to my mom, man, I'd really love a phone, you know, be really useful. I can keep in touch with you. And she was like, okay, okay, you're turning 13 soon. And one day after school, she picks up, which is special, because I normally catch the bus. So I'm like, oh, okay, something's happening. And we go over to a Vodafone store, and she's like, Caitlin,

you're getting a phone. Oh, what a great surprise after school at that age. over to a Vodafone store and she's like, Caitlin, you're getting a phone. Oh, what a great surprise after school at that age. Yeah, I was like, wow, this is finally happening. I'm a grown-up now. So we go in and she's caught ahead so that they know what to do and they're like, this is your plan. And I don't really understand it, but I'm like, cool, I'm getting a phone. I'm getting a phone.

Whatever the plan is, I don't care. Give me the phone. Exactly. I don't really understand it, but I'm like, cool. I'm getting a phone. I'm getting a phone. Whatever the plan is, I don't care. Give me the phone. Exactly. I don't understand how prepaid work. Just give me the phone. And then she pulls out of her pocket the tiniest little Samsung Ace, probably one of the first ever touchscreens ever invented, and says, here you go.

Here's your phone. Now, I'm looking at the Samsung Ace. Ultra, $5.50 it's worth. $5.50. What a bargain. Wow, what a cheap phone. Wow, but yeah, this is the thing. I had the same, I feel your pain.

My mum went to America. I didn't go, and I was like, can you bring me back a pair of Jordans, some Nike shoes? That's all I want. That's all. That'd be great. I wanted to have them like my friends, and she came back, and it was a shoe box. I was like, can you bring me back a pair of Jordans, some Nike shoes, that's all I want, that's all, that'd be great, I wanted to have them with my friends and she came back and it was a shoe box, I was like, oh here we go

and I opened it up and they were a brand of shoes, it still exists, called British Knights, now they're a fine brand of shoes but when you have in your mind all you want is Jordans, she gives you BK British Knights and she's like the guy in the store said these are better than Jordans, I'm like, oh mum I bet he did.

So I feel your pain. It was a lovely surprise, and I'm very grateful, but the only app I could have on it was Flappy Bird. Looking at it, it's your nuts and bolts phone. It'll make a call. My mum would have this phone and happily live out the rest of her days with this phone caitlin uh what phone are we talking to you on now uh it is a samsung a32 so i've upgraded hey good on you caitlin appreciate it samsung galaxy a she's going for five dollars fifty on the market it's a great boy that's a bargain it seems like the sort of

phone you'd buy if you're having an affair g G'day, Jo. Welcome. Hi. Hi. Underwhelming surprises, Jo. I'd been breastfeeding twins for about two months, and Mother's Day was coming up, and I was quite excited about what I might receive for this inaugural Mother's Day. Well, I mean, you've got twins. You've got one on each. Well, exactly. You've been working hard.

And so I received a coffee cup in the shape of a cow. Oh, because you're being milked all the time? Was that the time? Yeah, yeah. I was a cow. A coffee cup? You're like, is that? Was there anything in the coffee cup?

Was that a breakfast in bed situation, keep the cup sort of thing? No, no, no, no, no. I was first up as usual at that time in my life. Let's do a reenactment of how it all played out. Hi, Joe, how are you? Good morning.

Guess what? It's time for your present. Yay! Okay, here it is. Thanks for all the hard work you've been doing with the twins and all this stuff. Here we go. I think you'll enjoy this. Oh, thanks. Did you ever use the cow cup? Yeah, I did, actually, to be fair.

And since then, have there been better presents, Jo? Yes, there have been a few more better presents, yes. You do take a gamble on a present, don't you? Yeah. Because I do see the person giving it to whoever, they're like, they're going this and sometimes they get it wrong don't they yeah i i had a really awkward situation i it was a you know secret santa one year at a radio station we were working with i remember it well and there was a guy there who had a really good torso joe he's very you know good muscles yeah yeah and behind his back we called him the rig yeah great rig and but he didn't know about

the rig no so what i did i was like well what the rigs like they like oil oil rigs so i went and purchased a bottle of baby oil and i wrapped it up and you put for the rig on there as well didn't you and this guy opened it and he was like like, oh, the rig. Oh, the oil rig. Okay. And I noticed you kept yelling out but not wanting to make it. For the rig. For your torso. Because you've got a big rig.

And he still didn't quite get it. Anyway, we put that baby oil to good use at some point. Thank you very much, Joe. You're going to have a great day. You too. Thank you. See you, mate. We apologise in advance.

Jeez, sorry. Sorry about that. Sorry you got roped into this. We apologise in advance. Jeez, sorry. Sorry about that. Sorry you got roped into this. Jono and Ben. Sorry. On the hit. Let's go. Jono and Ben with five words for 5K.

Stop any time to keep the cash. Thank you. Or play on to win more. It is a simple game of word association, but it's tricky to match all five words with someone else to win $5,000, but you can win plenty of cash on the way. Well, yes, we could let you inherit $5,000 like King Charles inherited the throne. Except we've got a few less sex scandals with this competition. Dani, you're on from Auckland. How are you?

Good morning. Good. How are you? You're in the Defence Force. Oh, yeah, I am. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry, I know everything about you, Dani. Yeah, yeah. Cracky. everything about you, Danny. Yeah, yeah, cracky. What do you do in the Defense Force? I am an analyst, data analyst. Ooh, no follow-up questions there.

I don't know what that job does. Danny, $5,000, what are you going to put that towards if you win? I'm such an adult, just stuff for the house. Fair enough, that's what you do when you're an adult. stuff for the house Fair enough that's what you do when you're an adult The first time you go to Bunnings

on the weekend you're like well you know there goes the fun times Although Bunnings is now a fun time

Yeah what is it It's great It's a wonderland It's a wonderland So much joy Alright Danny who are you going to send into that soundproof booth

some solitary confinement Not solitary confinement I'm going to send it that soundproof booth? Some solitary confinement. Not solitary confinement. I'm going to send it to Jono. Okay, we'll see if we match. Jono's heading on in there. You know how the game works, obviously. Danny, here is your first word. What pops into your head when I say Elton?

John. Elton John. Roll on is the second word. Roll on. Deodorant. Deodorant, yeah. Whipped is the third word. Cream. Cream.

Cream. Shape. S-H-A-P-E. Shape. Oh, no. Triangle. That's a hard one. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Triangle's good. That first thing that pops into your head was triangle. And pay. P-A-Y. Money. Money. Well done.

Well done, Danny. We'll get Jono out of the soundproof booth Money. Well done. Well done then, Danny. We'll get Jono out of the soundproof booth. I liked it. Quick, fast, efficient. First thing that pops into your head. That's the one. It was good. Okay, how did you analyse that performance there, Danny?

Oh, a bit stuck on the second to last one. Okay, all right. That's the shaky word. There's always a couple of shaky ones, words four and five. A bit of a shaky, yeah. It gets tough because there's words with lots of options, but that's ripping to the $25 word. Yep, yep.

Word one, $25. Elton. What pops into your head when I say Elton, Johnny? Elton John. That's right. That's what Danny said. You've matched up one word. You've got $25.

Do you want to risk it all to go to the $50 word? Go to the $50. Here we go. Word two, $50. Roll on to the $50. Here we go. Word two, $50. Roll on. Deodorant. Here we go. Danny, we are in sync.

All right. Are we heading up to the $100 word, Dan? All right. We doing it? Word three, $100. Whipped, whipped, whipped. Three. $100. Whipped. Whipped. Whipped. Is word number three whipped? Cream?

Keep going. Yes, that's it. Oh, my gosh. You're taking so long. What a drama, mate. Come on, mate. What a showbiz drama, eh? Spice it up.

Well, we get told off for how long this takes after the show. That's on you, Jono. All right, here we go. Now, this is the big decision. You have $100. You are a bit shaky on word four for $500. What do you want to do? Oh, God.

You've got $100. You know what? I'm going to bail. I'm going to bail. Take your $100. I'm going to bail. Oh, this is killing me. No, no. Take $100. That's good.. Take your $100. I'm going to bail. She's killing me. No, no.

Take $100. That's good. You got $100. Let's see how you would have gone. The next word was shape. Shape. I'll go barbecue shape. Oh, my God.

Hey, you made the right decision, Danny. He was thinking about his stomach, so there you go. Bernie loved barbecue shapes. Hey, what did you go? Oh, I went triangle. Oh, triangle. There we go. Lots of options for shape as well.

The final word was, of course, pay day. Pay day, yeah. So there you go. Well played, Danny. $100. Oh, cheers. You're a little bit of a poke in the eye. You're a little bit of a...

Hey, you're right. You're a legend. A chance for someone else to win tomorrow. With a health star rating of zero, Jono and Ben on the hits. Big day today, isn't it? Huge day. Wednesday.

Yeah. What's happening on Wednesday? I don't know. I was trying to think of stuff that's happening today. It's probably just another day, to be honest. It's another day in life we're just trying to plough through. I saw Top Gun last night. Top Gun Maverick. Is it good? It's really good, actually. It is. It's another day in life we're just trying to plow through. Finally saw Top Gun last night.

Top Gun Maverick. Is it good? It's really good, actually. It is. It's a blockbuster movie. Like, everything that you'd hope for in a Top Gun movie, I was like, oh, this is, yeah.

Like, I liked the first one, but it wasn't like, oh my God, I've got to see. But yeah, it was just a blockbuster. Little tears, action, it was all sorts. Did they... Man of my life pulled me up

for crying at the end of it too. Did you cry in Top Gun? I had emotional, it's very emotional. It was Goose's son and he's out there and Goose was the one that died and the first one is son and he's with Maverick and I'm like, oh geez. Does Goose die? Does Goose's son die? I'm not telling you that, mate.

I'm not spoiling it for you. That's really good. It's actually really good. What's up, Joel? I was going to go watch the first one tonight. Thanks for spoiling that for me, Ben. Well, if you haven't seen the first one by now, come on, you've had a while.

Cheers, man. You've had a while. Don't go back and watch the first one of anything. If there's been a remake, it's definitely going to be better than the first one. Well, you'd say a lot of times. Well, yeah, I'd say most times you're right. Technology has advanced a lot since 1986. Do they still play volleyball with no shirts on uh they have a like see again

they have a they have a sort of american football on the beach scene with no shirts on oh so that's kind of like the homage to that and that one republic song i ain't worried about it is the song that plays in that one it kind of feels yeah there's lots of moments that feel like a throwback to the original but not not just going, let's do more volleyball with our shirts off. If you could wrap the USA up into a 90-minute movie. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Goddamn USA. USA. Do you know what? We were driving through, was it Fendleton on the way to the airport in Christchurch, Ben? Speaking of planes. I don't even know if it's Fendleton or Fendolton, or if that's just the way that people say it when they live there.

I think if you lived in Fendleton, you would call it Fendleton. Yeah. But yeah, speaking of planes, it reminded me. Because we were driving out and there's some very wealthy, affluent housing around Fendleton. Fendleton, yeah. I don't know. And I noticed that many of them had tennis courts. You know, tennis, like a tennis court takes up a large chunk of land.

And shit, you've got to love tennis. To have a tennis court in your house. The only person who should have a tennis court in their house is probably Serena Williams. She's going to make use of it. You know, if you had a property that large and you had a tennis court, I'm like, how often are you using that, mate? What are you using your tennis court for? You'd hope that you would be into it. I mean, it'd be a great thing to have if you had that space, but you're right.

But no one loves tennis that much. Well, you're a big fan of tennis. I know, but if I had a court, I'm not going to be... When you first got it, you'd be like, mate, we are playing tennis like it's the US Open every single day. You do the ones where you can put basketball hoops in either way. You can make it more than just a tennis court. I'd chuck some high-rise apartments on there.

We've got a housing crisis. Bit of a bloody 20-story apartment block on that tennis court. I just found it interesting to have a tennis court. Yeah, you're really doing all right in life if you've got a tennis court. There's probably a lot of stuff you bought before buying a tennis court and you've just run out of stuff. I don't know what else to buy. I guess we like tennis, sort of.

Now, the traffic light system, the COVID-19 protection framework of the system, it was just gone. It was great framework, it was gone. Ben, for some reason, is very upset that it's gone. He felt it didn't get the descend off from the Prime Minister on Monday that it deserved. I'm glad.

Don't get me wrong. I'm glad that it's gone. But I just felt like it was such a big part of our life. For 12 months, it was like, we're in this, we're in red,

we're in orange. Are we ever going to get to green? And then Sunday, it's like, ah, it's gone. And it's great. It's gone. But I feel like,

you're right. We didn't pay tribute to it. Jacinda didn't give it the homage it deserved, according to Ben. She just wanted to get on a plane and get off to London. That's over. Day off on the 26th. I'm off to London. Yeah, but don't have the day off until I come back.

Don't, don't, don't. Anyway, so I was like, well, let's give the traffic light system a great send-off. It's gone now, and it will never hopefully be back, but let's give it a great send-off. An appropriate send-off. So your idea is? The traffic light drink. The iconic drink that you often get as a kid,

mainly at places like Cobb & Co, where you know how a traffic light works, green, orange, red. The drink would come, and you'd be like, oh, wow, this is made up to be a traffic light. Why don't we go out there and drink some traffic lights? And then I saw this thing. This guy in Wales had gone around 56 pubs in 24 hours and bought a drink from every pub.

Now, he didn't go alcoholic because he couldn't drink 56 drinks alcoholic. So he just bought a drink in 56 places that sell drinks, alcohol. But he bought a drink and broke a world record. I'm like, let's go out and order 57 traffic lights tomorrow. Let's do it. Well, this is my thing. The current traffic light world record doesn't stand. It's not a thing.

We can go to one, two, three, four locations, four traffic lights. We've got the record. But we want his record. We want his record. Leave the score's record alone, poor guy. I'll take it off the Welsh. I want 57 pubs. They're mourning over that side of the world.

I want to take this off him, but I want to do it in a way to pay tribute to the traffic light. Let's stimulate the economy. Get out there and order 57 traffic lights. Yeah, well, we did wonder. There's two big concerns here. Firstly, do they still serve them? Are they still in market, the traffic lights on the menu? And secondly, are they easy to make if they're not?

So if we went to a bartender, you know, make us a traffic light, he's like, it's not on the menu. Or she, it's not on the menu. Thank you. It's not on the menu. We're like, oh, can you whip one up? Janine, bartender, she, phone through. A little bit of orange juice, and then you put red food colouring

or red syrup, then you just fill it up a bit more, and then you put your green food colouring at the top. So orange juice, a little bit of you put your green food colouring at the top. So orange juice, a little bit of red cordial or food colouring and green food colouring and that's it? Yeah. That sounded easy but to make it look like the colours aren't blending in together I imagine there's a little bit of a trick. Generally if you stir it up it looks like mud.

What's going to happen though, it sounds like what you're describing is a buttload of sugar times 57 glasses ben yeah oh yeah definitely yeah here we go so tomorrow uh we're doing it tomorrow yeah we're on it we're doing it uh saying goodbye to the traffic light system that i really cared nothing for but i'm dedicating a whole day of life it was a big part of your life and this is going to be the one last big part of your life too the end of the traffic light system. That's happening tomorrow, 4487. Love your help with any places we can go,

how to make a good traffic light or whether you think it's a good idea, 4487 on the hits. You've been listening to a podcast from the hits. For more audio, search up Megan Pappas on the 3pm pickup or Brad and Laura on the hits. Available now on the iHeartRadio app.