Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: When Your Tongue Gets Stuck To The Deep Freeze

Episode Date: November 24, 2021

To celebrate 100 days in lockdown, we gave a bunch of people $100 on air! While a lot of us have been "stuck" in lockdown, we wanted to know where else you have been "stuck"... One woman called up saying when she was younger, she licked the ice in the deep freeze and got stuck to it, with no help around. And that was just ONE story we got! We also discussed one of life's most mundane tasks and why it seriously sucks, and Jono got into an internet wormhole about Adele. Enjoy the podcast!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, brought to you by Resene, New Zealand's most trusted paint. Kiwi made since 1946. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome to the podcast. Hello, my name is Jono and his name is Ben. And together we are the duo of Jono and Ben. Yeah, that was a weird but lovely introduction. We are just watching some rolling coverage at the moment. We're just discussing the excessive coverage on the National Party,

basically disintegrating from the inside out. Judith Collins is the leader. There's been talk recently that Simon Bridges, the former leader, is going to roll her. And then last night he was meant to roll her at a meeting. She cut the meeting. Dilette said will not be attending or whatever, declined on the email. And then said Simon Bridges would not be held responsible for any of his portfolios. He's dropping back to the bottom of the list because of a comment he made five years ago at a national party party.

Yeah, it's all just, it seems like excessive coverage. Yeah, they're rolling with live coverage at the moment on 3 at the moment. Does it warrant live coverage? I mean, it's obviously big news, I get it, but it's... We're not in the news game, so I don't know. I wouldn't like, yeah, if someone came to me and was like, Briar, you're the head of, you know, Al Jazeera, what do we do? Do we roll? I wouldn't know. I'd say, I wouldn't like, yeah, if someone came to me and was like, Briar, you're the head of Al Jazeera. What do we do?

Do we roll? I wouldn't know. I'd say, I don't know. Personally, I don't give a, I don't care. Yeah, I mean, I'm obviously interested to find out who's going to be leader after this, but I'm not like, what's the update outside the room? Well, I'm standing outside the room where they're having a meeting. So they're having a meeting now.

Yeah, you're right. And I'd go, oh, ask him. If I was in the newsroom, ask him. What do you think, mate? Do you care? Yeah. But the rumour has it that Collins is coincidentally probably going to get rolled today. After burning bridges, which has been a lovely headline we should have gone with.

You did burn bridges. Has someone else gone with that? I don't know. I don't know. We don't put headlines out there anyway. Yeah, claim it now. Great headline, boys. What do you reckon?

Rolling coverage on this whole bridge? As long as you put burning bridges on there. Great headline, boys. What do you reckon? Rolling coverage on this whole Bridges suit? As long as you put burning Bridges on there, then that's good. Building of Bridges. So, yeah. So she might have axed Bridges, but then ironically might end up walking out as the leader the next day. Yeah, we'll find out if this rolling coverage continues. Yeah. I'm not...

I don't know if I'd have the... I don't have the thing for politics. Would you be able to get into politics? No, no, no. It's a, it's a, no, no. Not for me. You'd be a good small town, rural, you know, mayor. Yeah, a mayor would be all right.

Like, yeah. Not that anyone would want me to be a mayor. I wouldn't say that. No, but you'd go, you'd go around. But it doesn't seem quite as nasty, the mayoral game. Maybe it is. Yeah, well, if you're anywhere apart from Imbacargal, probably. Yeah.

A little shedbark. Oh, yeah, true. That's kind of it. You know, you back a good mayor. I could see you going around cutting ribbons. Yeah, I'm a chat like banter. Yeah. That'd be great.

Put me on a dunk tank at the school fair. These sorts of things. You know, I'd be up for that. Yeah. That wouldn't be great with the big decisions of the town, though. Would you do a sack race? I'd do all that stuff, yeah, absolutely. Would you be a suit and tie sort of

mayor or a bit of a casual, you know, a shirt, obviously, but you know, a bit of a button down? Oh, it depends on the occasion, I guess. You'd take your chains around to the school, local primary school, show them the mayoral chains? Yeah, you'd be a good mayor. Not a Phil Goff, no, you know, no big city mayor. No, no, you'd be a good mayor. Yeah. Not a Phil Goff. No, you're not a big city mayor.

No, no, no. You want to be sorting out Auckland's traffic problems and housing crisis? Oh, jeez, I wouldn't want to do that. But you're right. Maybe like the Hauraki Plains. You know, that little stretch of nothing on the way to... Yeah. Maybe we can go back to Marsden one.

No, they probably wouldn't have me. Marsden and mayor? They wouldn't have me. They might. They might. You know what I'm going to do, Ben? You won't like this it's a podcast intro

why do you do this in the podcast intros we've gone on for four minutes it's like you just can't stop my last chance to do radio today gotta make it count I'm going to call the council see if you'd even be a consideration

you know because if this is a serious but I'm not going for it Masterton District Council. See if you'd even be in consideration. You know, because if this is a serious... But I'm not going for it. Who's the... It's Masterton District Council. Yeah. What are you hoping to achieve by this?

I'm going through to the mayor. Good morning, Deborah speaking. Hi, Deborah. Is this Lynn Patterson's office? Is this the office of the mayor of Masterton? Yes. It's John Owen Bean from The Hits.

How are you, Deborah? I'm good, thank you. I'm sorry about this, Deborah. It's Ben here. Look, I grew up in Masterton, and we were having a conversation, and Jono was like, would you be a mayor? And I said, oh, no, look, I could never be a mayor, but if I did be a mayor, I'd want to be Mayor of Masterton,

because that's where I grew up. Right. So, Deborah, my question is... Are you planning on running? No, I'm not. Yeah, this is my question. I know he said sorry for this call. I make no apologies for this call.

Because, Deborah, would he be a serious candidate? I mean, Lynn's been there for a long time. I don't want to roll Lynn. She's doing a great job. Would Deborah seriously consider working with Ben Boyce as Mayor of Masterton? I'd consider anything. Oh, okay. The door is open.

The door is open, but I'm not running. But it's not me you have to convince. Yeah, it's the people of Masterton. It is. Yeah. They're the important ones. That's right. Oh, well, Deborah, who knows?

You could have a new mate. New mate's company selection. Okay, I'll look forward to it. Just get your annual leave in early. We've always got to sort that out overbra, who knows? You could have a new mate. New mate's coming next election. Okay, I'll look forward to it. Just get your annual leave in early. We've always got to sort that out over Christmas, all right? Okay. See you, mate. Thank you.

Bye. There we go. So, Ben, hey, political aspirations. Maybe this is how it all starts. You know, get the ball rolling, get it out there. That's what Trump did. Trump's first rally, this is a fact, his first rally to become president, everyone who was there holding Trump's sign were all actors, paid actors.

Were they? Yeah, he manufactured a whole support team. Didn't it all come about because they didn't renew another series of The Apprentice or something? Yes, it's all, I need to do something else. Yeah, there was something there. Yeah, so it can be done, mate. It started right now. Oh, jeez.

When you're running the country in 10 years, you'll look back on this podcast and try and be like, why'd you call the thing? You'll be thanking me. Oh, well,. When you're running the country in 10 years, you'll look back on this podcast and try and be like, why'd you call the thing? You'll be thanking me. Oh, well, there you go. All right, enjoy the podcast. New Zealand's Breakfast. This is Jono and Ben on the hits.

Good morning, New Zealand. Welcome along to the show. It is a Thursday morning. Good to be with you this morning. How's everyone going? All right? Yeah, not too bad. Juliet was a little anxious.

She's like, I've got no headphones. Now, headphones are like a builder turning up to the site without a hammer. Oh, my God. I can't hear the music that's playing. Is that too loud? No, you're all good. It's all going fine. Great.

It's like, you know, not having your trousers on, isn't it, on the radio? I sometimes do with no headphones. I don't mind. But I don't have to listen to all the music that I'm pushing, June. No, no, no. So it's essential to your trade. Jeez, I spilt coffee on my trousers this morning. Okay, now it was the point where I was like, oh, maybe I can ride it out, you know?

But then I got into the car and I was like, oh, it looks like my pants have been caught in the crossfire between two spray tan guns. It was just, there was no coming back. So then you've got to go, you know, another five minutes at that hour of the morning, just really. Every second counts in the morning, doesn't it? Oh, Phil, you had that incident too, didn't you? Yeah. Oh, yeah. This happened a few times.

It usually lands around the crotch area as well too. You're like, oh, here we go. And then you feel like you need to explain it to everyone you see. If you, you know. Oh, this is just cool. Yeah. I don't, I don't, you know. Well, but no one will question though if it's on your crotch.

You're like, something's severely wrong if that's the result. True. Hey, we've got a massive show today, and we'll tell you next how you can win some cash. But basically, well, you've done all the hard work. You can just win the cash next. People are already calling. I know, but wait. They have to wait.

They don't even know why they were going to win the cash. They've just heard cash. Full border calls, 604. Where are you every other day? That we're babbling away on the radio. We'll tell you more next. It is the hits. You've got Jono and Ben.

Ben and Jono call this show Jono and Ben. Breakfast on the hits. The hits. We've got to celebrate something. No, you're not calling it a celebration, are you? No, I don't think we should celebrate because a lot of people have gone through some hardship. What would it be? An acknowledgement?

Yes, I think it is. An acknowledgement of a milestone this year for 2021. Have a listen. Well done, Aotearoa. Well done on navigating a short, sharp lockdown. We want to be short and sharp. Well done on picnicking without pe lockdown. We want to be short and sharp. Well done on picnicking without peeing.

Make provision for it, Barry. Well done on the spreading not of the virus, but other things. People to get outside and to spread their legs. Well done, Tova, then Jessica. Tova. Jessica. Tova. Jessica and Tova. Well done, Scott Morrison, for being the only world leader to reference cartoons. It's like that movie in the Crutes. We can't stay in the cave.

Well done, Barry. Barry, I'm going to ask for a little decorum. Have some decorum, Barry. New Zealand, it's time to raise a glass and raise an eyebrow. Not you, Brian Tumachie. Yours are raised enough. To 100 days of lockdown and 100 days of trying to keep our faceholes apart throwing out those articles from your old baseball to celebrate the 100 days in a left level this

sucks jono and ben are giving away 100 to every caller and don't worry south island unlike the government we won't forget about you you can win two too. A hundy for a hundy. Today on The Hits. That's right, COVID cash, baby. Yeah, 100 days since the short, sharp lockdown has started. And so, yeah, it doesn't matter if you've been in lockdown for 100 days or you haven't been, anyone can win today if they get on the air with us. I don't know why we feel that we've taken it upon ourselves to financially make an apology to the nation.

Probably the same reason Brian Tarmack, he's taken it upon himself to have protests about something that's ending in two weeks anyway. Same responsibility. I feel his pain. Should we take a call? Yeah. A hundred bucks?

Yeah, a hundred bucks. Why not? Let's go to Invercargill. Corey, welcome to New Zealand's breakfast. Corey? It's $100, so why not? Let's go to Invercargill. Corey, welcome to New Zealand's breakfast. Corey? This has been a fumbly start, Corey. Is Corey on the air or not?

Is Corey there? Yeah, I'm here. Oh, you're there. How's Invercargill this morning, Corey? Oh, it's not too bad. COVID-free, baby? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, wait until the 15th mate when we come down there. We've got a special

present for you. The summer tour. COVID the summer tour. Hey, $100 coming your way Corey, alright? Oh cool, thanks man. No worries man. What are you doing today Corey? Just getting the kids up ready for school. Ah, that's always a battle isn't it mate?

Hey, good on you, Corey. You're going to have a great day. Keep safe in the South. You too. That's how it works, just like that. So throughout the morning, if you get on air with us, $100. It just seems too easy. Simple as that.

Yeah. It's too easy for us because we don't have to deal with sending out the cash to people. Yeah, exactly. Broadcasting live. And mostly awake. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's Breakfast. Yeah, exactly. Broadcasting live. And mostly awake. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. On the hits. A lot of talk about Adele lately.

Yeah, there is. She's getting a lot of street talk, a lot of lip service, isn't she? Yeah. Probably speaks volumes as to the artist she is and has become Ben Boyce. And I, I'm, my lips have been moving as well. Saying Adele, Adele, Adele and I got lost yesterday in an internet wormhole. Jono's internet wormhole. Yeah, the internet wormhole.

It's the only thing lower than a snake's belly. It's Jono's internet wormhole. And Adele, here's some facts that you never knew about Adele. Well, what did you know about Adele? You tell me what you know about Adele and I'll tell you if you didn't. I know that she names her albums after the age she's at when she creates the albums. Okay, I'll delete that one, yeah. What else do you know?

I know that. I know she's gone through a bit of a divorce. Oh, okay, delete the divorce one. She's obviously, that's all I've sung about in the album, yeah. Okay, well, those were half of my facts about Adele, you knew. She had an inspirational teacher. We've seen that clip going around the internet. That was pretty awesome.

Okay. But this is not about what I can regurgitate off the top of my head. This is what you have discovered. Do you think many people know that stuff about Adele? I don't know. Because this might not be. Anyway, did you know she has the voice of a singing angel. A singing voice of

an angel, doesn't she? Because you've got the talking voice of an English football hooligan. I find, Adele. You know, a football hooligan that'll whack you over the head with a road cone or something after a game. Yeah, it's really interesting how you can, yeah,

like what she sounds to what she sounds to. Like, have you heard her talk and you're like, that lady can sing. I'm like, get out of here. Yeah, if you play that and go, that's that lady talking, you'd go, really?

Yeah. It does not mash up. Yeah. But yes, she's been very talked about over the last week and more talked about than you trying to get onto the Wi-Fi network, Ben. Yeah. Which is a constant topic of conversation in the studio.

Juliet, I've been logged out of the computer. I've logged out of my Wi-Fi. I've put my password in wrong three times. Yeah. Okay, here we go. Did you know Adele went to the same college as Jessie J? Jessie J? Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, this one, yeah. Pre-arranged audio clip of Jessie J. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, this one, yeah. Pre-arranged audio clip of Jessie J. Yeah. And Leona Lewis. Oh, wow. Same time or different? Same time. They're at the same time.

Is Leona Lewis British? Yeah, she's a British lady. Wow. I did not know that. She's the one who had a banging choir. Yeah. Oh, you wouldn't want to take them along in the singer song-a-thon, would you? They didn't win Rock Quest that year

or something, you know? Hell of a team. And then she also went to the same performing arts school as Amy Winehouse. Wow! You know, which is probably not that surprising, given they're all from England and London. I guess there's probably only so many singers, aren't there? The next one, Ben Boyce. Adele

used to have a house with 20 rooms in it, but sold it because she didn't use 19 of the rooms, she said. Which, you know, when you break it down, which means she was cooking, sleeping, and bathing in one room. Yeah.

She could have used five or six. Unless it was bedrooms, but you're right. Otherwise, it's just... It was a shocking purchase if you built a house with 20 bedrooms in it. No kitchen or anything. Unless it was bedrooms, but you're right. Otherwise, it's just... It was a shocking purchase. You've got a house with 20 bedrooms in it. No kitchen or anything. Next one. Adele, along with Beyonce, holds the record for the most Grammys won in a single night. She won six Grammys in one night.

How many Grammys have you won? None. I don't think I ever will. I think it's a wonderful achievement, but it's a huge responsibility to arrive home with all six Grammys after party. You've got to go to after party, you're right. Next fact about Adele from the internet wormhole.

Oh no, that's not that good actually. The good thing is you're not pre-reading. You're still getting live. This is mildly interesting. Her and Drake are best friends. Did you know her and Drake, the rapper, are besties? Well, I didn't know that, but then we heard the couple that got engaged on Adele's special with Oprah.

Didn't they say afterwards that Drake came up and congratulated her? He must have been at the concert. He must have been at the concert. Yeah, so Drake and her, they go out all the time and hang out as mates. They hire out bowling alleys and go bowling together. Drake! Drake and Adele. And Adele!

That's pretty awesome, isn't it? But then if you think about, like you say, the way Adele talks and her sort of personality, you can see it kind of matching with Drake. She would be a laugh and a half. And most nights she vomits backstage. What? Really? It's huge stage fright.

Wow. Ben does the same in the studio. It's starting to really seep into the carpet, isn't it? The old ragdoll drill. There you go. That's the internet wormhole on Adele. Oh, very good. Kids, keep up that running or you'll end up like these guys.

Trono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. That's kind of cool. We're heading into summer now. It's just a month to Christmas today. So there you go. Officially. Yeah. You had your Christmas tree out, what, in July or something?

We went a little bit early. We went a bit early. But last night, you know, because it is summer evenings, I heard this noise and the kids heard this noise in the neighborhood. But when you hear it and you're like, hang on, everyone stops. And you're like, how far away And you're like How far away is this And then the kids are like We need to get on our bikes

And we need to find it So we rode I reckon we would have done The Tour de France last night Trying to find And then we couldn't hear The siren again But you're on the streets

And it's a great little You know And then you panic Searching for coins in the house Yeah Oh now they've got Now they've got EF POS and stuff

Oh they've got EF POS But we didn't Mr. Whippy. But we didn't find Mr. Whippy. Yeah. Well, we could save all this biking and just go straight to the dairy. We must have done,

honestly, like a 10k bike ride for 45 minutes just trying to hear in the streets because it's one of those things you don't know, is it a k away? Is it 10k's away?

Can we faintly hear at what direction? It'd be a wonderful prank to go around just with the Greensleeves song playing on your car. Just driving around neighbourhoods. Yeah.

What they need is a tracker app. I was thinking last night. That is so true. That is genius. Why is there not a tracker? The Mr. Whoopie tracker. Mr. Whoopie in your area. Because then you know what Mr. Whoopie's up to all the time.

And maybe Mr. Whoopie wants to have some... Oh, I hate Mr. Whoopie talk. Like Mr. or Mrs. Whoopie or Whoopie, whatever, you know, can just turn it on. When they're active. when they're active. And you're like, oh, it's three streets over. Be good for their business, good for the kids. Exactly. Did you just have to 2021 Mr. Whippy?

Did I? Or Mrs. Whippy. Do they need to tag it and all Mrs. on the truck? Yeah, probably. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know anymore. It's 2021. He's got his fingers in pies and fingers in buckets of hand sanitizer.

He's anti-germ. He's anti-natal. He's anti-lockdown. He's pro-news. Ben Boyce. So yesterday, the big announcement was, of course, that most fully vaccinated travellers into New Zealand would not be required to go through MIQ from early next year. That's the big news. It seems like you're going to have to self-isolate at home and it's going in phases.

The first phase is from people coming from Australia, fully vaccinated Kiwis and other eligible travellers. And that happens, basically kicks in January 17. And then another month later it goes to some other countries as yet not entirely specified and it seems some sort of April onwards it seems like we're open up to the rest of the world. And so those facilities just go back to being hotels? I guess they will, yeah.

I think they might still have MIQ if they're under-vaccinated travellers but I would imagine getting into New Zealand on some airlines would be a lot difficult. So you're right, so a lot of them would go back to being hotels again. Oh, good on them. They would go, well, that was a wild couple of years for the old hotel chain. Give it a little spring clean, get the dead old wipes out,

and we'll move on with life. Many people are thinking it's not happening fast enough, though obviously you feel sorry for people that, you know, want to be with their family around Christmas time. There was a lot of talk that it's from the 17th of January, sort of is after a lot of people's Christmas holidays. So it's kind of, is it a strategical move from the government? And Judith Collins had this to say about Jacinda Ardern yesterday.

Basically, Jacinda Ardern is the Grinch who has stolen Christmas from many Kiwi families. Zing-ah. Zing-ah. Beautiful there, Judy. Judy would have been happy with that one yeah uh i wonder if it was a grinch well there we go sorry so i thought there's something talking that was the uh the grinch it's the grinch um but they've got to be careful too you can't have an influx of overseas visitors coming in yeah can you yeah well that's yeah it's interesting because you do hear you know and on other particularly on other radio stations, you know, saying we need to open up fast enough.

And I understand faster, sorry. People open up faster. Oh, they're saying that on the breeze, are they? And I understand if you're working in tourism and stuff like that. But then at the same breath, they're talking about there's a whole fourth wave in Europe and things are going back into lockdown and stuff. Oh my goodness, are you kidding? I think it's in relation to the booster.

So if you don't have the booster, the vaccine wears off incredibly quickly and becomes not as effective. Right. Yeah, I think, did you tell me that yesterday, B-Humps? Great, I thought it was another moment where I was just spouting stuff off. Yeah, well, there was something I actually read

over the weekend was saying that, you know, we should be opening up earlier, you know, getting people out there because, as you say, every month you leave it, people become slightly less vaccinated. You know? That is true. So, you know, three or four weeks ago when we were in lockdown, we were probably more vaccinated. Well, we were more vaccinated scientifically than you are now.

Yeah, you're right. And another slice of information that my information provider, producer B Hums, gives me. I mean, he just tells me stuff that I repeated on the radio. You're his mouthpiece. I'm his mouthpiece, yeah. Whatever agenda you're running mate, it's coming through my lips, alright? I'm just being used. He also said, it's going to be interesting

because of the vaccine passports. My favourite thing is watching Producer B Hums' face when you're talking he's like, what did I say? What did I say? Because he can't obviously Chip in now So he's just like

So he's mowing into the board Of NZ Meat And the hats And Again Again Just questioning the direction Of the company

Yeah That sounds like him No he will say that The Vax passports They're valid for six months So we've all got them Let's say for the most part now Yeah

Then there's going to be This huge logjam in six months. People wanting to get Vax Passports and you won't be able to get your Vax Passport unless you've got your booster. Then there's going to be a hell of a clog. Like me after not eating fruit for three weeks. Backed up, mate. And that

is scrolling to your feed. Live free. The Summer Holiday Edition with Škoda. We have got your summer sorted. If you win this, $5,000 for your summer holiday and the use of a brand new Škoda Kodiaq 7-seater SUV. You can be one of the first in Aotearoa to drive that around the country. That would be awesome.

That would be amazing. And I tell you what's amazing, Ben Boyce, is I'm going to give you the opportunity to talk to a trainee phlebotomist. All right. Sheena from Auckland, welcome. Hey, Sheena, how you doing? Hello, I'm doing really well. From our phlebotoms to yours, it's wonderful to have you on. Are you on the way to training, are you, or work?

I am on my way to work, yeah. So you collect blood samples for the lab? We do indeed. Oh, good on you. A lot of shortage in blood donation, blood donors, aren't there? There is, actually, there is. And COVID's made it that much more difficult. I imagine.

Yeah. Everybody's doing their part. We're trying to get through, so. Yeah, wow. And you just don't, it's just used so much, isn't it, the blood that is donated? Absolutely, absolutely. Yeah, I hadn't thought about COVID. It affects every industry, doesn't it?

Oh, COVID, yeah. Well, you're in the draw for $5,000 and that use of that SCODA as well as that, though, because every caller wins $100 today. You're on the air, you get $100. Ah! You guys have made my day. Oh, sure. Yeah. That's a lot of wonderful energy at 6.39 in my day. Oh, Sheena.

It's a lot of wonderful energy at 6.39 in the morning. I'm loving it. Absolutely loving it, Sheena. So yeah, you got the free cash already. And you could have the free car for two weeks and then you could have more free cash from us as well.

Oh, that's just perfect. Where would you take the Sh That would be my Christmas, yeah. Where would you take the... I would take the... probably South, because I haven't been as far as Wellington, so maybe Wellington would be a good start. Oh, good on you, mate.

You sound like a champion of a human being. You go and have a wonderful day. Enjoy that 100, and good luck for the draw, okay, Sheena? Thank you, guys. You guys are awesome. You always make my that 100 and good luck for the draw, okay, Sheena? Thank you, guys. You guys are awesome. You always make my mornings.

Oh, well, we really appreciate that. Thank you. Have a great day. You too. Bye-bye. See you, matey. Next,

producer Julia, a 10-minute song is number one on the Billboard charts. I know, crazy stuff. 10 minutes. 10 minutes, baby. And I'll find out

who it's by. We should play it. Yeah, we could. We could play it. Let's play the world's longest songs back-to-back. A countdown to that. And check out for the rest of the it. Yeah, we could. We could play. Let's play the world's longest songs back to back. A countdown to that.

And check out for the rest of the day. It is the hits. You got John on bed. Spy. No WhatsApp. Spy.co.nz. All right, it's time now for Juliet to make this show sound in touch with the world of celebrities.

Let's get touching them celebs, Jew. So Taylor Swift has set a new record. Her 10-minute version of All Too Well. It's officially the longest song to be number one on the Billboard 100 and 200 charts. So the previous song that held this record was American Pie by Don McLean. This is my dad's favourite song. Oh my God. He loves it. If he could listen to one song on repeat for the rest of his life, it would be Don Mc. Oh, my God. He loves it.

If he could listen to one song on repeat for the rest of his life, it would be Don McLean, American Boy. It's a jam, you know? But it's one of those, because it's so long, it's a builder. It's like, you're going to wait, it's coming, and it picks up a bit, and then it picks up a bit. I find that a lot with Elton John's Tiny Dancer. You don't hear, hold me close to Tiny Dancer

until four or five minutes into the song. You're like, sing Tiny Dancer! But American Pie was eight and a half minutes, and hers is officially ten minutes and thirteen seconds. Don McLean has said, there is something to be said for a great song that is staying power. American Pie remained on top with that record for 50 years, and now Taylor Swift has unseated such a historic piece of artistry.

Let's face it, nobody ever wants to lose that number one spot, but if I had to lose it to somebody, I sure am glad it was another great singer or songwriter such as Taylor Swift. What a true gentleman. 50 years ago that song was released. Jesus, how old was Don McLean? The old pie would be shriveled up. Yeah, you're not eating that pie now, are you? It's expired.

Oh, that's good. So that's the scarf song, isn't it? About Jake Gyllenhaal not returning her scarf. Yeah. I think I have listened to this song on repeat in my car for the last two weeks since it's been released. Oh, really? It's just so good.

Sorry, I should chill out. A friend of mine, he's a huge Taylor Swift fan. He was crying. Oh my gosh. I was like, don't mention that publicly. But he was crying. Is he a grown man as well? He's fully developed.

Taylor Swift gets to give me all those feels. Have you heard the new Taylor Swift album, Ben? Not all of it, to be honest. I've heard the original. You went to the Taylor Swift show. You bought some merch, didn't you? I enjoyed it the original yeah but not you went to the Taylor Swift show you bought some merch didn't you I bought some merch

I enjoyed it you got light up bracelets as well it was cool you know you get swept up in merch madness yeah I do you do he loves a bit of merch

but I have worn the t-shirt in my defence I've worn the t-shirt he does no he pulls through but you know is there merch for you like why did I buy that

oh yeah sometimes I like your Mickey Mouse salad service yes that was fun as well. And you've got Mickey Mouse clock, don't you as well? Is that still up in the household? Yeah, well yeah, but I'm the only one that's still fighting for that Mickey Mouse clock. The salad servers

are made, if we haven't heard about the salad servers that he purchased, and I want to whim over in Disneyland, they're made of Mickey Mouse's hands. Yeah. Not conducive for picking up lettuce though. Yeah, they look cool, but they vary by some Mickey struggling to pick up the salad.

It's like, come on, Mickey, you can do this. That's good. And Keanu Reeves and Winona Ryder, are they actually married in real life? This is kind of making headlines again. So almost 30 years ago, they filmed the movie Dracula together, where they basically did a whole take of a marriage ceremony with real priests.

And kind of a Winona Ryder has said maybe we're officially married for quite a while now. And Keanu Reeves has spoken about it publicly for the first time. He says, you know, Winona says we're married. The director says we're pretty much officially married. So I guess we are under the eyes of God because they had an official priest there. And he also said that once in a while he will get a text from a Winona Ryder saying, hello, husband, just out of the blue

because from the movie they may be officially married. Oh, so they kind of went through a ceremony of such. Are they officially married? Is she texting him saying, pick up some milk on the way home? Good question. Yeah. She's saying the lawns are long, they need to be mowed.

Obviously they're not actually together in real life but under the eyes of God they could be married which is kind of a bizarre situation. That's how I live my life, under the eyes the watchful eyes of God. You do, don't you? The Father, Son, the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Ben's always like, you trying to shove your Catholic propaganda into the show? He's like, you only do it to get your kids into a Catholic school. I remember someone told me a while ago when I first started working with you, someone was like, is Jono religious? I thought I saw him leaving church, like

mass, and I was like, I don't think so. That would surprise me. I don't scream religious. No, you don't. But you do it to get your kids into school. I don't. So that's the main thing. That's the main thing. I do it.

So how often did you go to... Anyway, I don't want to incriminate you in the eyes of the law, in the watchful eye or whatever. The watchful eye of God. But just before kids to school, it seemed like there was... I've been eating Jesus' body and drinking his blood like there was, you know. I've been drinking, eating Jesus' body and drinking his blood since I was,

mate, years ago. Yeah, but was that forced upon you or was that because you wanted to go? Oh,

listen. Through your 20s? I have stuck loyal. I have stayed loyal and true to the Catholic Church. I'm glad. Okay. Well done,

Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done,

Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done,

Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done,

Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done,

Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done,

Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done,

Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done, Well done. Well done. Well done, John. I don't know what my faith question, alright? Now I know how Brian Tarmacky feels. He's just trying to get through life, run a new religion in need. Alright. That is Spy for the South, Eat Christianity Chat. For more, you can head to thehits.co.nz Yeah, you know. Yeah.

Nah. You know. The home of yeah, nah. She'll be right, and at the end of the day John O' and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Hairdressers and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Hairdressers and Barbers opening for the first time in Auckland since August 17. How's that opening now? And it seemed like last night there was a barbershop I was reading out in Birkenhead that opened up at 12.01 last night, went through at about 3 in the morning, and then has opened up again around about 7 o'clock this morning.

Because you imagine there would be quite a lot of customers wanting to get in oh it's geez they're going to be making bank aren't they between now and christmas i hope they can recoup you know some of the loss they've had over the last hundred days that industry you would imagine they're going to be flat stick seven days a week well yeah you're right to make up for all the you know three months of people not being able to book in yeah i told I told you my plan, eh? Susie, my sister-in-law, is a hairdresser. Get a caravan, drive around the streets. Well, you should have done that. Like, yeah, it would have been good.

I should have booked a caravan. Yeah, I've been talking. Now the people can go to a hairdresser or a barber. But it's, yeah. I've been talking and doing a lot of talk about it, but no action. Yeah. Yeah, sums me up. Yeah, talk and not do it.

Talk and not do it. that's how I came up with Apple TV and didn't reap the rewards because I didn't do you he doesn't think I came up with Apple TV but anyway but anyway

it was a tube system oh yeah that's right it was a tube system that sucked your DVDs and videos between Video Easy and your house that's great

basically Apple TV well tell me do you turn on your TV and there's a movie you want to watch there? Yeah. Same thing. Tubes.

There's no tubes. Someone's done it without the tubes. Without Video Easy sending DVDs somehow through tubes. But anyway, we'll get to,

I don't know, we won't get to that again. There's a suction system if you're wanting to know. I had thought it through. After seven o'clock, heaps of $100 to give away, so stay tuned for that. It is the hits. You've got Jono and Ben.

Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. This is Jono and Ben on the hits. Good morning, just gone 7 o'clock. You're on the hits with Jono and Ben. 100 days since lockdown first started and we're marking this occasion by giving you the chance to win $100

Well done Arturo, well done on navigating a short sharp lockdown We want to be short and sharp Well done on picnicking without peeing Make provision for it Barry Well done on the spreading not of the virus but other things. People to get outside

and to spread their legs Well done Tova then Jessica To. Well done, Tova and Jessica. Tova. Jessica. Tova. Jessica and Tova. Well done, Scott Morrison, for being the only world leader to reference cartoons.

It's like that movie in The Croods. We can't stay in the cave. Well done, Barry. Barry, I'm going to ask for a little decorum. Have some decorum, Barry. New Zealand, it's time to raise a glass and raise an eyebrow. Not you, Brian Tumachie. Yours are raised enough.

To 100 days of lockdown and 100 days of trying to keep our faceholes apart. Throwing out those articles from your old facehole there. To celebrate the 100 days and alert level, this sucks. Jono and Ben are giving away $100 to every caller. And don't worry, South Island, unlike the government, we won't forget about you. You can win too. A hundy for a hundy. Today on The Hits.

That's happening. Every caller on here wins $100 today. And next we want to do something with a little bit of a spin. Don't we, Ben Boyce? You need to give producer Bee Humps The gatekeeper of the cash Well he's the one that allows people to come on the air Yeah you need to give him a reason

As to what this money's going towards Because you know we'd love you to spend it On penetrating the economy Yeah Getting out there and putting the money to good use That's right So whether you want to buy some novelty aprons Yeah, yeah. Getting out there and putting the money to good use. That's right, yeah. So whether you want to buy some novelty aprons,

a whole bunch of those with abdominals printed on them, they're cool. Kiss the chef or something on them. You can buy anything. You can walk into your butcher and say, give me all of your finest meats to the value of $100. Exactly. So next we'll find out from producer B Humps what sort of things he's looking for,

and then if you think you can come up with a reason why you deserve to get on the air and you deserve $100, then you'll get through and you'll get $100. That's very shortly on the hits. From a socially distantly safe two metres. Don't go there. Stay away. This is New Zealand's Breakfast with Jono and Ben. 100 days of lockdown for the country.

$100. Every caller we're giving it to as a celebration or in commemoration of A for the country. $100 every caller we're giving it to as a celebration or in commemoration of Aotearoa navigating their way through this. And Producer Behumps, you've been managing the budget this morning. Beautifully as well. He's doing a wonderful job.

$200 given away so far. Right, so we've still got, well, quite a lot to give away, right? Yeah, we're going to hand out more cash than Grant Robinson's work subsidy schemes. That's right, so you are the Grant Robinson of the show, and we're going to do a little game here where people phone us up

0800 the hits and tell us how they're going to use the $100, hopefully to stimulate the economy, and you decide whether it's worthy. Yeah, I think it's got to be fun. You know, it's got to be, as you said, it's got to stimulate the economy. You've got to get as you said it's got to stimulate the economy you got to get out and spend it i don't want to hear about your life savings i'm going to put it towards retirement savings not fun being retired no no no not fun i actually went on there's a website it's like go banking rates.com and they have had a list of the craziest

things you could spend a hundred dollars on so can I give these examples to you and you say, if I ring up, would I get the $100? Sure. Okay, one pound of Wagyu beef. Ooh. That sounds fun. This is American. Would you say okay? Yeah, Wagyu, yeah. Archery gear. Archery gear, that

does sound fun. Yeah, these are good. Remote control helicopter with built-in camera. No, you'll crash it. It'll be like, it'll last five minutes. You Yeah, these are good. These are good ones. Remote control helicopter with built-in camera. No, you'll crash it. It'll be like, it'll last five minutes. You'll, you'll, you'll, yeah, no. A 10-foot square area of land in the Scottish Highlands where you can be lord or lady of that 10-square land. We're not in Scotland, so no.

But that sounds fun being a lord or lady. You're not going to own any land in New Zealand for $100. A levitation device that floats small objects up to 12 pounds. Yeah, that's fun. See what you can float? Seems like a worthy investment. I never knew it existed, but there you go. So most of those got the pass. Yeah, they did, actually.

So if you like Wagyu beef or levitation devices, then you've pretty much got the $100. So 0800 the hits. Give us a call now. Producer B Humps will hear your reasoning of what you're wanting to spend the $100 on, and he'll decide if it's worthy of you getting onto the airwaves. He's the gatekeeper. Now, must we also mention, he's just gone out of the room,

he loves a deep tissue massage and gluten-free bread. Those are his two favorite things. He does love gluten-free bread, you're right. And the town of Fairleigh as well. That's where he's from in the South Island. Yeah. Because he wants to buy the camping ground there and call it Fairleigh Intense.

So that's the sort of guy you're trying to impress. We want to give you a bit of a profile. He loves a swan dry. Loves a swan dry jacket. He does. And he loves looking like Ned Flanders. He does look like a hot Ned he does look like he's got a mustache and quite long hair and uh yeah so those are the things that's his that's his area so if

you think you can manipulate that sort of character that personality oh 800 the hits uh and as we said every caller hundred dollars yeah hundred days of lockdown all rightie dokie. We'll do that with Producer B Humps next on 0800 The Hits. Jono and Ben, The Hits. Now, it's 100 days since the lockdown started, and we've managed to get off our bosses here at The Hits. $100 to give away for every caller that gets on the air. And this morning, to get on the air, you've got to go through Producer B Humps. We thought we'd do that right now.

He's the gatekeeper of the cash, and you need to convince him that your fiscal spending is worthwhile for this $100. I'll tell you what phone line we're not going to. Yeah? The phone line we're not going to is line one. Debbie wants to pay a phone bill. Oh, yeah, you did stipulate.

He said fun stuff. He said fun stuff. That's practical. We're not going practical? Cain, booze. Last resort. Sorry, Debbie. So Debbie's just been named and shamed there.

A bit of public ridicule. That's just how ruthless you can be, though. This is the brutal world of handing out prize money, so let's kick it off with Kate in Christchurch. What would you like to spend this $100 on? How are you going to stimulate the economy? I'm going to spend it on some vinyl for my cricket machine. Vinyl for your cricket machine?

Explain what this is. I'm curious. It's an art and crafty machine. So I'm making personal guides, like glasses and stuff like that. So you can stick vinyl on it with people's names, or you can put rude stuff or do whatever you want. Rude stuff. The rude stuff was the thing. I was kind of like, there we go, there we go.

What rude stuff? What rude stuff are we talking here? Oh, you can put anything you like on it. As long as I can get a picture of it, then yeah, that would be just, you know, mind go wild. And I also thought that potentially you could take these to a market, sell them, and then your $100 turns into, you know, it's endless. Exactly.

That's exactly right. You know what now? You've said this. You know what you're all getting for Christmas from me. And also off here, I've organized a 20% cut. Okay. Well, Kate, you and your X-rated arts and craft machine, we'll give you $100, all right?

Awesome. thank you. Well done on 100 days of lockdown. She got us there with the rude stuff, didn't she? Let's not take Steve. He wanted to give it to charity. Oh, hey, when do we ever not want to give something to charity? How's that going to stimulate the economy? It's going to help out anyway.

Excuse me, when do I never want to give something to charity? When you avoid going to the supermarket, when you see those collectors waiting at the front door, he will sometimes just not go into that supermarket. He'll go to another one. That's when you don't want to give to charity. Because he doesn't want to awkwardly interact. There's no parks in the car park.

That's the only reason I'd leave. Let's get Hemi on from the Waikato. How are you, Hemi? Good to have you on. What are you going to spend this $100 on? Convince Bee Humps, hear me Oh, we've lost him Hear me, so close to $100

Oh, you see, now he should have spent it on the phone bill Yeah Otherwise his service wouldn't have been cut off We'll go to Mary in Auckland $100, convince producer Bee Humps you need it Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate Chocolate patty A handy of chocolate?

A handy of chocolate What are you going to do with all the chocolate, chocolate, chocolate. Chocolate patty. A hundy of chocolate? A hundy of chocolate. What are you going to do with all the chocolate, Mary? It's not just for me. It's for my twin boys. They love chocolate. So why not? Why not? $100 on chocolate.

We're talking to Willy Wonka herself here. $100 on chocolate. She's on the air. I love it. I love it. All right. You've got $100 worth of chocolate. Should we try and squeeze in one more? Yeah, let's do it.

We're celebrating 100 days of lockdown, $100 for every call that makes it on the air. It's time to pop the champagne, Gavit. 24 of your closest friends and socially distance and celebrate. We'll get Carissa on. Inver Cargill, how are you this morning? Hi, I'm good, thank you. Good to have you on. You sound 70% awake.

What do you want to spend this $100 on, Carissa? It's mine and my husband's four-year wedding anniversary next week, so I'd like to go out for dinner. He said that's not fun. It sounds fun. I like it. We have four boys, so we need a night out. Four boys, four-year anniversary, and I tell you what,

you celebrate on us. That's amazing. Thank you. Every part of that evening, you think about us. Oh, that's amazing. Thank you. Nice. Every part of that evening you think about us. If you're looking for an anniversary present we know someone who does rude stuff

on Arts and Crafts. The world's your oyster apparently. Anything you can think of she can do it. Yeah. Good on you, Carissa. Well done.

You enjoy that $100 and have a great Thursday and Invercargill, alright? Awesome. Thank you, guys. Hard-hitting interviews and informed opinion. Mike Hosking on Newstalk ZB. In the meantime, here's

Jono and Ben. The Heads. Just heard in the news there, the National Party seem to be in a lot of disarray. More disorganised than my life, the National Party at the moment, aren't they? So overnight, it seemed like, Judith Collins demoted former leader Simon Bridges, stripped him of his portfolios

over a complaint about alleged comments he made to a female National Party MP. This was five years ago, and from what I gather, it was dealt, well, he thinks it was dealt with at the time. Well, Bill English was the leader at the time, and it was all dealt with. But Collins hadn't heard about it, and she's decided to demote him from his leadership, you know, for his portfolios in the National Party. You never want to be stripped of your portfolio,

Steve Penboys. But this also came on the same night that there was meant to be a caucus meeting and it was tipped that Bridges was going to roll Collins in that meeting. So then she's pulled this out at the ninth hour. Desperate scenes. Clinging on to the leadership, Rudy Judy.

That's what Simon Bridges has just said. He's just been accosted by some reporters going into Parliament. And it isn't accosting too, is it? Yeah. He's just got out of the car. They're like... What do you want to say? Basically, she said that it's truly desperate stuff is what he's claiming,

but we'll find out more when he goes inside, talks to Caucasus, and then he's going to come out with a press conference later this morning. This would just be all too awkward for me. I'm not that psyched. I wouldn't deal with confrontation. No. Especially if I was Rudy Judy. I was like, oh, a lot of people don't want me here.

And now I've done this really weird play from five years ago. Well, yeah, obviously he's not denying he didn't make a comment at the time, and he apologises to the lady who was obviously offended by what he said. Although Barry Soper was just on ZB. B Humps was saying, and he said he knows what the comment was, and he's like, it's very minor.

Really? Yeah, very minor comment. Wow. Okay, well, we'll find out more details throughout the morning. It's like when I call you sugar cheeks or something in the office, Ben boys. That's right. You love it though, don't you? We'll find out more. All right, sugar cheeks or something in the office, Ben boys. That's right. You love it though, don't you? We'll find out more.

All right, sugar cheeks. Morning, this show contains traces of Jono and Ben. The Hits with Jono and Ben for breakfast. 100 days since the lockdown started. And while there's light at the end of the tunnel, we thought today, because it has been 100 days, we're going to give every caller that gets on the air $100. And Jessica from Paraparaumu, guess what?

Yeah? You're on the air, as they call it. Whatever that means, on the air. You're on it. Oh, awesome. And you win $100. Thank you so much. No worries.

Easy as that. That's pretty simple, right? Yeah. What's that going towards, Jess? I'm getting my kids a new swimming pool for summer. Oh, okay. It'll be maybe the world's smallest swimming pool, but it'll be a collection of liquids nonetheless.

They're very little, so it doesn't have to be big. Yeah, like little Smurfs swimming in a bucket. That's lovely. Well, you enjoy that, Jessica, and have a wonderful day on the coast there. Cool. Thank you so much. It is on the coast there. Cool. Thank you so much. It is on the coast, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah. Good. I tried to sound like I had local knowledge. No, it's good. It's a lovely beach. Yeah. I started questioning myself halfway through. Yeah.

Ben Boyce, I think, you know, we are celebrating 100 days of, or commemorating 100 days of lockdown today. And, you know, that's, I want to acknowledge that that has not been the most enjoyable experience No, I don't think for anyone really But I think I've found something far worse And it is changing the duvet cover There's stuff going on in the world, pandemics, famines and stuff But nothing is worse than changing a duvet cover

It leaves me in agony afterwards i'm sweating i'm irritable i need a shower to cool down you know i need to meet deep meditation what's your issue with the changing the cover like what are you what are you really struggling every single part of this but the the the one that's tipped me over the edge yesterday was there's buttons. You know, there's buttons that you do up at the end. Now, some have buttons. Some have little clips. Clip things.

Oh, okay. Yeah. What are you running there, Ju? I've got a button one. You've got a button system, Ben Boyce Clipper or a button up? We've got one that's a button and one that's a clip one. Oh, okay. Someone's doing well in life. Well, no.

It's just where you take one, you put the other one on, and the button ones are a bit more fiddly, you know. They are, yeah. So yesterday I was doing the buttons up. Now, this is the finish line of what has been a traumatic event of changing the duvet cover. And I get to the end of the buttons and I've missed one. You know, when you miss one in the initial stages

and you go through and you're like, no, I systematically joined all the things up, the buttons up with the slits. And you get to the end of it and there's the overhang of the one button that hasn't been buttoned. And it's always the first one or two buttons. Yeah, you've got to go all the way back. So you have to go all the way back to the start line.

And, jeez, there's a part of you that goes through in your mind, well, I could just roll with this. Yeah, I was thinking you can. But your morals never let you. Oh, do you not? No, do you roll with it unbuttoned? I just probably roll with it. It's probably easier to just kind of roll.

It's easier to roll with it and then you go, oh, did I? You know? I did it. I did it and then you go oh did i you know i did it i did it i thought oh you are one of those guys yeah because every morning when he goes out in the dark he sees you know the cat might have done something on the floor he sees it yeah but then uh i didn't i didn't notice that so you're more of a and you uh you love shoving stuff in cupboards and hiding it away as well so i wouldn't you know i wouldn't put that past you what if you do your shoelaces up you know a pair of shoes you're tying shoelaces in and you get to the end and one's uneven you know one's shorter than the other is ben boyce going back or is he going no he's just rolling with it i'm just looking at my shoelaces right now and i'm definitely rolling with it yeah

for a guy that is so neurotic in many areas of his life doing it buttons and uneven shoelaces right now and I'm definitely rolling with it. For a guy that is so neurotic in many areas of his life, doing it buttons and uneven shoelaces aren't. I'm a mystery, guys. That's why I stay with him. Plus he's wearing a top featuring all of the golden girls today saying squad goals.

He is. Juliet, do you find him mysterious? Yeah, sometimes I do. It's really hard to put it. But yeah, anyway, I struggle with that stuff. I'd like to unbutton you and find out what you're all about, buddy. But then I wouldn't trust myself to do you back up. Five words for 5K on the hits. You're only five words away from a massive payday.

It is our game of word association. We play it every morning. We give you five words. You say what pops into your head. If all your words match up with ours, you win $5,000. Shondell, welcome from Hamilton this morning. Good to have you on the show. Morning.

Great to have you on, Shondell. Tell you what, if you won this $5,000, you could walk straight into the Outback, the bar in Hamilton, and just make it rain like a rapper in a hip-hop video. Okay? Yeah, we've got to wait until it opens first. Oh, yeah, true. Don't go there now, it's closed. You'll just be throwing money at no one.

You won't get the credit you deserve. But you're a florist. Yes, I am. How's the floral industry been over the last few months for you there, Shondell? Oh, crazy busy. Yeah? That's good to hear. Yeah, it's really good.

You're up early, eh? Getting to the markets. Yeah? Well, that's good to hear. Yeah, it's really good. Oh, that's good. You're up early, eh? Getting to the markets. Yeah, yeah, yep, yep. There's a florist down the road from my house when I drive to work. Every morning she's up and at them. Right. Battling away. Yeah.

Are the markets vicious when you're all bidding for flowers? Do you end up in, you know? Yeah. Are they? Yeah, it's a real stressful time. Oh, really? Is it like an auction sort of for flowers? It's not like Trade Me. Oh, really? Is it like an auction sort of for flowers? It's not like Trade Me.

Oh, wow. No holes barred. Yeah. Have you choked someone out before at the Flower Ox in Shawndale? Probably, many times. Give an apology flowers later. I'm sorry. You got away on me.

All right. Who do you want to send into the soundproof booth? Jono, Ben, or Producer Juliet? Jono. Okay, I'm going to head on in there, all right? He's going to make his way to the soundproof booth. Jono, Ben or producer Juliet? Jono. Okay, I'm going to head on in there, alright? He's going to make his way to the soundproof booth and once he's inside, I'll give you your first word and you'll see what pops into your head.

Here we go. First word this morning is Benedict. Benedict. Eggs. Yeah, eggs. Nice work. Vespa is the second word this morning. V-E-S-P-A. Vespa. Oh, pass. Come back to that one?

Yeah. Prank is word number three. Prank. Joke. Yep, that's what popped into my head as well. Wine. W-I-N-E, wine. Alcohol.

Alcohol. Nice. And guide. G-U-I-D--e guide is the last word oh it's a tricky one isn't it travel oh yeah that's perfect travel guide and now we need to go back to vespa v-e-s-p-a vespa any ideas anything popping into your head no nothing at all do you know Nothing at all? Do you know what it is? Yeah, do you know what it is? No, I don't know what it is. Well, I don't know how much I can lead you into what I, you know, it's...

You might write, you know, it's not a motorbike, they say, but it's slightly smaller than a motorbike. Moped? It's just like, well, you could say moped. You could say another little thing just to scoot around town in, I guess. Scooter? Yeah, well, that's one option. I don't know if that's what Jono's going to say, but that's an option.

So I apologise. That's an option. Okay, I'll go with scooter. But then I feel like that's on me now. No, it's okay. Would you think? Yes, that's one of the options I would have had. Well, here we go.

One of the options. Oh, jeez. No, I only had another one. Okay. Was it moped? Yes, I think it was, actually. Oh, okay. So now you know.

Okay, moped or scooter? What are you going to go for? Oh, I'll go. No, I'll go moped. Okay, moped. All right. Here we go. Good.

It's not on me now. That's good. The pressure's off. All right, here we go. Good, it's not on me now. The pressure's off. That was quite stressful, Jono. Yesterday I said it was a bit stressful, Jono. But don't you worry about it, mate. You've just been in the Southbrook booth. I have been doing Pilates.

Yeah, all right. Get him a stretch on. How are you feeling, Shondell? Not great. Not great, that's good. Because I was born to win you some money. As I was coming out of Annie Pryor's canal, she said, not great. No, great, that's good. Because I was born to win you some money. As I was coming out of Annie Pryor's canal, she said, this child. You've just got to say what I said, all right? Yeah, just say it.

Just say what she said. That's how it goes. I know the rules of the game, mate. I have to play it every morning, Shondell. Let's do it, eh? Unfortunately, you didn't hear what she said. But anyway, let's see if you can match up. Okay.

Benedict is the first word. Benedict. There's two, but I don't, are you, Shondell, are you a fan of actors?

Astors? Actors. As in? Actors. People who act. Oh, actors. Yeah. Okay. Benedict. But, Yeah. But she wouldn't...

The way she responded. Are you a fan of Brunch? She's not a Doctor Strange kind of movie. I absolutely love Brunch. She loves Brunch. I love that Brunch. Like, if I said to Shondell, Doctor Strange, are you going to watch that or go for Brunch?

She'd probably say, I'll go for Brunch. We'll go for Brunch. Well, then I would say, X Benedict. Yeah. Wow. Benedict Cumberbatch is obviously what you were going for, right? The actor. Okay, here we go. No more help now. Vespa.

Scooter. Oh! What did you go? Moped. Moped. Now, we had a big debate over this because we, yeah, but, nah. Sorry, Shondell. After all that weird Doctor Strange, Benedict Cumberbatch rigmarole we've pulled out on word two. Oh, okay, let's see how we would have gone.

Prank. Prank. Call. Wine. Drink. And guide. Tour guide. Goodness. No good today, I'm sorry. Wine Drink And guide To a guide Goodness No good today

I tanked that I'm sorry Shondell That's alright I thought Shondell Played a pretty good game You do play a good game Hey I tell you what also Did we tell you

You've got $100 already Because we're doing 100 days of lockdown Every caller on air Gets $100 Shondell Yay that's amazing Good on ya Awesome thanks so much For playing Enjoy that $100 We'veondell. Yay, that's amazing. Good on you.

Awesome. Thanks so much for playing. Enjoy that $100. We've got some Spy on the way for you. Yeah, Caitlyn Jenner and Alan DeGeneres' feud. More next. Spy, the WhatsApp spy.co.nz. All right, time for us to shove our sticky beaks into the private lives of those that own private jets.

Juliet with Spy. So, Caitlyn Jenner is on big brother vip at the moment and in one of the more recent episodes she has dished on her feud with alan degeneres now um in this big brother episode she was talking about how after she came out as transgender in 2015 she went on the alan show and they discussed the concept of gay marriage now this for context is the interview back in 2015. I have to admit I remember 15 years ago 20 years ago whatever it was when this whole gay marriage issue came up at first I was not for it. I mean I thought I'm a traditionalist but as

time has gone on I think like a lot of people on this issue have really changed your thinking here to I don't ever want to stand in front of anybody's happiness so that was what was said back in 2015 and afterwards um alan went on the howard stern show and kind of talked about this with howard stern howard stern's big radio guy over over in the u.s and uh now caitlin jenner on big brother has talked about it for the first time and how she felt and kind of what happened afterwards. Then she asked me this question about, have you had a progression on gay marriage and this and that? And so I tried to do my best and I thought I did okay.

And then she goes to me, well, it sounds like you're really not for it. Oh, wow. And I said, no, I just said I am for gay marriage. The next week, she goes on Howard Stern's show in New York, her radio show, and says I was against gay marriage and absolutely burnt my ass. Did Ellen contact you after she found out? Never once. So after you were upset? I thought maybe I should call Chris and say, Chris, why don't you just ban any of the kids being on Ellen?

But I didn't. I thought, I don't want to get involved in that. Let them do their thing. Awkward. Well, to be fair to Kaylin, Kaylin didn't say that she was opposed to gay marriage. She said, 15 years ago I was. Yeah.

But now I've changed my mind and I'm not. Yeah. And then for Ellen to go and say Kaylin was opposed to gay marriage. It's interesting. It wasn't true. She didn't say that people's thoughts do change over time

and like she said she as a transgender woman you know this is one of the causes that she does care about so yeah which I imagine

would send if she was opposed to gay marriage a confusing message over a transgender person who was opposed to but hey do we put this past

evil Ellen that's my question I knew this was going to happen but hey, do we put this past evil Ellen? That's my question. I knew this was going to happen. This is just the ongoing storyline of something Ellen would do. Champagne Ellen. Champagne, yeah. Surprised she didn't prank her on the way out. You know, do one of those fright scares as Caitlyn was leaving the studio.

Very true. Imagine if Caitlyn and Chris did ban the Kardashians from ever going on Ellen again. That would be a relative hit maybe to Ellen. I don't know. Who knows? And in other news, the Fresh Prince of Balea reboot trailer has been released. Now, this is a reboot that's just called Balea. It's not a comedy lighthearted like the OG.

It's a drama one. It's going to be out next year. And Will Smith is sort of narrating the trailer to the words of the original theme song, but it sounds very different. This is a story all about how my life

got flipped and turned upside down. Very dramatic. I can take the same thing from a sort of upbeat rap and make it sound so dramatic. I know. It's like when people, have you seen those videos on YouTube or Facebook or whatever where people will turn a comedy into a murder mystery just by changing the music

and the filter on the video to make it quite dark? Have you got some dramatic music there? Because being been boys you know famously you wrote a uh a jingle didn't you you wrote a jingle back in the day for a glass repair company yeah i've got it and uh you know if we're gonna go a bit serious on that Crack. Oh. Novus. Show us your crack. Sounds a lot more dramatic, doesn't it? Novus. I mean, all they're doing is repairing cracks in windscreens.

But you're right, this would be a dramatic crack. Music does wonderful things, doesn't it? It really does. And that is your Spy Update for this hour. For more, you can head to thehits.co.nz. The Hits. New Zealand's breakfast. It's Jono and Ben. Cl.co.nz. The Hits. New Zealand's breakfast. It's Jono and Ben. I'm in love.

On The Hits. It is The Hits. Jono and Ben. Now, of course, it's been 100 days since the lockdown started. And because it's 100 days, we thought we'd mark this occasion with this. Well done, Aotearoa. Well done on navigating a short, sharp lockdown. We want to be short and sharp. Well done on navigating a short, sharp lockdown. We want to be short and sharp.

Well done on picnicking without peeing. Make provision for it, Barry. Well done on the spreading not of the virus, but other things. People to get outside and to spread their legs. Well done, Tova, then Jessica. Tova. Jessica. Tova. Jessica, then Tova. Well done, Scott Morrison, for being the only world leader to reference cartoons. It's like that movie in The Croods.

We can't stay in the cave. Well done, Barry. Barry, I'm going to ask for a little decorum. Have some decorum, Barry. New Zealand, it's time to raise a glass and raise an eyebrow. Not you, Brian Tumachie. Yours are raised enough. To 100 days of lockdown and 100 days of trying to keep our faceholes apart.

Throwing out those articles from your old facehole. To celebrate the 100 days and alert level, this sucks. Jono and Ben are giving away $100 to every caller. And don't worry, South Island, unlike the government, we won't forget about you. You can win too. A hundy for a hundy. Today on The Hits. Yes, we've all been stuck in various stages of lockdown through that 100 days.

So we wanted to know next on our 100 The Hits, where have you been stuck? Not just lockdown, but where have you been stuck? The more comical, the better. Are we accepting calls from Rolleston Prison? Well, yeah. I guess if you want to make your one phone call, if you've got a phone call to us. You can win $100.

Yeah. Buy you some smokes. Yeah. So, 0800 the hits. We'll do that next. Wherever you've been stuck, it is Jono and Ben. Your essential listening for non-essential banter. I thought I was saying something meaningful there,

then I backed out. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. 100 days of lockdown. The end seems to be in sight now, which is good. Obviously hairdressers and barbers opening up today in Auckland and then the bars and restaurants from next week and then the borders. And then the MIQ shuts up. Oh, then we're back to normal.

That's all going to happen by January, trust us. But 0800, that's every caller that gets on here this morning. $100 we're going to give away. Hundy for our Hundy days. And, yeah, well, we want to know this morning, where have you been stuck? Ben, can I acknowledge you? You've been stuck with me for about 10 years now. Yeah, true.

Keep getting you tested. You keep testing positive. Positive attitude. As soon as you go negative, you can leave. Yeah, well, I have been stuck. We're still kind of stuck together with an and between our names. That's right. And Juliet, you're in this sinking ship now too.

Lovely. You're coming down with us, mate. Right. All right, we've got Bex. Hello. Here's $100. That's on us. Well done.

You made it to 100 days of lockdown. Yeah. You sound pumped. Too long. Too long. Yeah, it's been too long. But what was your story about being stuck? Not in lockdown, but where were you stuck?

I was about 12 years old and I'd just finished watching Dumb and Dumber where Harry had decided to stick his tongue to the icy pole when they were skiing. Oh, yeah. Geez, that was a champagne movie. Do you know I gave my son a lockdown haircut and he looked like Jim Carrey from Dumb and Dumber. The poor kid. I showed him a photo of it and he's like

what have you done to me? I've done that to my four year old brother last lockdown. So you've seen Dumb and Dumber and you're like well hey I'll follow on for these Dumb and Dumber characters and what did you do? And then later on that night my mum wanted me to get something out of the deep freezer for dinner,

and I was home alone, and I thought, oh, you know, let's see if this is true. Surely your saliva's going to, you know, let it not stick. Please tell me you didn't stick your tongue inside the deep freeze. I did. Oh, Bex. I was home alone, and I didn't know what to do. I couldn't, you know, talk.

I couldn't grab anything and reach because the deep freeze was in the sheath. So your tongue is literally attached to the side of the deep freeze and no one can help you? No. You couldn't even yell for help, too? Could you be like, help? I didn't get time from work. How long later?

It felt like forever. I couldn't tell you and I didn't have my phone on me or anything. We're talking at least an hour or so. Yeah, and now I just get called dumberer because... Dumberer. How do you get out of that situation? Do they have to pour water on it or what do they do?

Lokewarm water was poured out of a cup and I ended up drenched. Who found you? My mum when she got home from work. Was she like, what have I given birth to? Why have you got your tongue inside the deep freeze? Yeah, well.

Was it cold? Well, I think I lost a layer of my tongue, you know, burnt off. Oh, jeez. Poor thing. And I think that most of the stuff in the freezer had to be chucked out because the freezer doors opened so much. I thawed out the freezer. What a position to be in. Yeah, I wouldn't do it again.

Yeah, good lesson. And a good life lesson for anyone wanting to stick their tongue inside a deep freeze too. We've all learned something today. Yeah, we have. Yeah. I definitely won't be doing that. Hey, well, $100 coming your way.

Thank you so much for sharing that story with us. Thank you so much. No worries. Jono and Ben, the hits. 100 days. New Zealand has been stuck in some various forms of lockdown since the short, sharp lockdown started in August. And we're taking calls right now.

Every call that gets on air gets $100 in celebration. And, Max, how are you? Where have you on here gets $100 in celebration. And Max, how are you? Where you been stuck? I'm good, thank you. Bloody great to have you on. Firstly, can we say well done? I don't know if you say well done, but you made it to 100 days of lockdown, so you win $100. Hundy for a hundy today. Wow, that's so cool. Thank you.

No worries. And apparently you've got a story about when you were stuck. Yeah. What happened, Max? What happened? Big deep breath. It was a little bit embarrassing. It was a long time ago.

Went into an expensive shoe shop, Overland Shoes, saw this beautiful pair of knee-high boots. Now, I'm thinking those would look good on Max's legs. I'd always wanted a pair of knee-high boots, you see. They mean business knee-high boots, don't they? Bearing in mind, this was back when they didn't make them with the nice stretchy panels to accommodate all cars. Right, so you went in the store and you're like, oh, did you try on a pair?

Well, I'm looking at them longingly, and the shop assistant says to me, oh, would you like to try them on? I was like, hmm, I think I'm going to get them on over my chunky calves. And she was like, oh, yes, you will, yes, you will. Oh, they'll be lovely. So, of course, we tried them and we tugged and pulled and squeezed and squashed. And the zip did go up.

Right. And then you know that thing that zips do when they kind of split apart? And it went all the way down, and there I was, stacked like a sausage. Oh, so you couldn't get your leg out of the boot? Couldn't get the zip down, couldn't get anything happening. So you're like, did you have to buy them, or how does that work? Well, she got a great big pair of scissors eventually. Cut the leather boots off.

Cut the leather boots off. So embarrassing. I think she was just as embarrassed as I was. She was just like, oh, no, no, don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. Did they give you any comments? Surely you got something for this, Max. I got...

A great story for the radio. I got... A great story for the radio. Yeah. I got embarrassment. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. I can't put stuff over my calves either. And it must have felt quite frightening for a while there when you thought, oh dear God, I'm going to have to wear these boots for the rest of my life.

Maybe this is it. All seasons, all the time, these boots are what I'm wearing. And they would have looked pretty bloody silly too. Oh, Maxwell, that's a wonderful story. Hey, we're going to give you $100. Did you end up getting some knee-high boots? Eventually. A couple of years later. It didn't put me off

but I was very careful about which style I chose. You're an absolute champion. Thank you so much for your time this morning and enjoy that $100. Thank you so much for your time this morning and enjoy that $100. Thank you so much. All right. Sasha. Hello.

Has got some cash. $100. Yeah, thank you. $100 for a hundred days. You've made it through. Mind you, you're in Dunedin, aren't you? Yes, we are. You had to deal with none of that,

but you still get the financial reward. Yeah, we still can't do big groups and stuff like that. Yeah, true. It's nice to be able to have big groups and sports functions and all that sort of jazz happening. And it'll be great for all the Aucklanders to come down and see you, two on the 50th. Yeah, pass on all your good COVID vibes.

Yeah, that'll be good. I'm looking forward to that in a couple of weeks. I've actually booked my flight. I'll really come down and stay with you. Where have you been locked in or stuck, Sasha? Well, my husband was working in Sydney. Sorry, living on

the south side of the bridge, but working on the north side. And one day when he was coming home with his mate, who was very unreliable, they ran out of petrol going across the bridge. Oh, this is my worst nightmare, getting stuck on a bridge. You would have been holding up all the traffic. But, yeah, many lanes were held up, and lots of people pissed off.

You just don't want to be that person, do you? No, imagine this happened on the way up, not on the way down, because the way down, you could kind of just... And, you know, the old cars and the fuel was always at the front and the tanks at the back or whatever, and it just all didn't happen. So, yeah, just had to push it up over the crest and the way they went after that. But, yeah. I've always said, you know, if illicit substances aren't your thing,

if you want a thrill, drive down the motorway with your petrol light on. Yeah. That is so, geez, that's an exhilarating experience. It is. It would be, yes. Do you know, you find it? I ran out of petrol once. I pulled over on the side of the motorway, and I sprinted down to a BP, which I knew was near the underpass. Came back with a container of petrol.

The police were there. You get fined $150. What for? Stopped on the motorway. Really? If you run out of petrol on the motorway, because it was clearly avoidable if I wasn't an absolute idiot. So if you do run out of gas, yeah's on you apparently if it's mechanical obviously they

don't find you but yeah yeah i love your work sasha you keep safe and enjoy that hundred dollars and i'll see you on the 15th babes i'll be at the airport with my big sign rated m for mildly amusing john and ben new New Zealand's breakfast Now yesterday I felt something I hadn't felt for a long time Probably because we've been in lockdown Joy in your heart? Yeah, probably that too, yeah I've seen this dead and lifeless human being sitting opposite me every morning

It was actually, well, yeah, okay, I haven't felt that for a while Joy into that cold heart of yours Still waiting to feel that, but it was public shame Like, because we've been in lockdown You haven't really been for a while. Joy into that cold heart of yours. Still waiting to feel that. But it was public shame. Like, because we've been in lockdown and you haven't really been interacting with too many people outside your little bubble, you know, I haven't felt public shame for a long time. Only your family's been ashamed of us. Yeah, that's right. You don't. That's been a good thing.

Yeah. And it happened yesterday and I was wearing a mask, but I still felt public shame. It was like I had to whip into town to do something and i parked in like a parking building and i hadn't been there with one with an elevator you know like a lift and it was open as i walked towards it and i was like oh i can get there and i sort of ran towards it and the lift doors who hasn't been caught in the lift doors i am pretty sure the oh the sole purpose of a lift door is to inconvenience human beings and publicly ridicule them. Yeah, it's like it's a prank writing.

It's like as soon as you're running towards it, they just start to close and you think you can make it. And I just, I did kind of, but my side of my head just bang straight to the side of the door. Kind of rattles you and then you kind of just work your way into the lift. And I was like, well, the good thing is no one was there it's an empty car park yeah but no there was someone standing a dude standing in the corner oh he must have been loving it oh yeah you'd never want it to happen to you but you always enjoy when it happens to others and you don't you don't know what to say in that situation but you're right i felt the public shame and he he said which is a great line he was like round one to the lift.

Yeah, great line. And I was like, yeah, okay, definitely saw that. And I sort of hang my masked head in shame. But I felt, you know, you feel the public ridicule. Sorry, do you edge your finger up politely? I was just going to compare this to a situation back in the day when I would catch like the school bus or like a bus to uni or whatever. When you're waiting, or no, the whatever when you're waiting or no the bus you're just arriving at the bus stop as the bus is there and you start running to catch it but then

it takes off and everyone in the bus is just looking there's nothing more embarrassing especially if it's a busy road it's like i just looked like a complete loser you know the driver's senior the driver's senior i mean it's what brings the that's what drives the driver every day is the fact that they will know that they could take off from some panicked human being running after the bus. The other thing, too, is with the lift door is I really – nothing makes you feel like a more superior human being or a hero than when you see someone running towards the lift door,

like this guy could have done yesterday, and he puts his arm in the way of the censor. You're like, wow, you're really... That is a nice gesture. You're putting your body on the line for another human being. But it's also quite fun being the person to go, oh, sorry, as they come towards you, like when you just look like you're fumbling towards the... But you're not actually going for the buttons.

You're like, oh, sorry, did you want to, you know? I'll never forget the day at our old radio station. You'll know the story i'm about to tell uh we were working with a friend sharon and uh ben boyce had scooched ahead into the elevator of the radio station and sharon and me were following behind but we were chasing we were keeping up a pace we could see him walking in we're like you know we're a show there's three of us we might as well transport ourselves down to the garage in the same vessel. So we're running towards the lift, Sharon and me, and Ben is in the lift, and the doors are slowly closing,

and we're like, hey. I think we said, hey, wait. You looked us dead in the eyes, and then you went, oh, sorry, and held up his hand. Were you the only one in the lift? Yeah. He didn't even try and feign pushing the open the door button. Oh, sorry. The lift doors are closing.

And then just slowly, just see this lift slowly disappear. Sorry. I had an odd interaction yesterday with someone. There was the double glass door situation. And so I was coming through. I was like, oh, there's someone behind me. I will hold one glass door open for them so they was coming through. I was like, oh, there's someone behind me. I'll hold one glass door open for them so they can come through. They weirdly opened the other glass door while I was sitting there,

welcoming with one open glass door. I was like, well, this is a first. John and Ben's Friday, thanks to Heinz Tomato Ketchup. This is so awesome. Every Thursday and Friday, thanks to Heinz Tomato Ketchup, we go to a new place, a new location in New Zealand, and someone can win free fish and chips from 12 to 2 o'clock. I mean someone.

I mean the whole town can come along and get free fish and chips. Well, I tell you what, the Mount will be mounting themselves onto their bicycles and making their way to this man's fish and chip shop this morning. Mark, how are you? I'm good, man. How are you this morning? Doing well, mate. Doing well. You run a fish and chip shop in Pilot Bay? Well, our club does, yes. Your club does? Who talked to us about your club? What is your club?

The Mount Asian Sports Club. And you're going to do free fish and chips for two hours? Yes, I understand. We've got free fish and chips coming on today. Where did you find out? I feel like you found out about this quite late in the piece. Are you okay with this? Yeah, yeah. Someone just threw me a curveball, and I thought, all right,

I'd best be the one. Yeah, well, good. You're very agreeable. So thank you, firstly, for putting this on with Heinz Tomato Ketchup, Mark. So you've got an ocean sports club. Yeah, well, we're the Mount Ocean Sports Club, which is effectively the home of three sporting clubs in Mount Maunganui, the Mount Maunganui Sports Fishing Club,

the Mount Underwater Club, and the Mount Yacht Club. 30 years ago, I suppose. Wow. We're offered what was the dairy on the Salisbury Wharf in Pilot Bay. I know it. Yep, yep. Another one.

I'm just looking at a picture of it right now. You're right on the wharf. Yeah, yeah. We're over the wharf. We're over the water. Best venue in New Zealand. They're not on the wharf, mate. They're not on the wharf.

They are over it. Yeah, sorry. We're over it. Yeah, we're over it, mate. Over it. Don't you mix that up. Yeah, yeah. We're over it. We're on it, mate. Over it. Don't you mix that up. Yeah, yeah. So there was a dairy there, dairy on the corner,

which was really there for selling tickets for the ferry. The leaders at the time were able to negotiate with the council, and the council said, well, as long as you keep the dairy going, you can extend your club rooms onto that in simple terms. Jeez, you're bloody spinning plates, mate. You're running dairies, running sports clubs. Yeah, yeah, well, you know, some of it's got to be adaptable. Yeah, so I'm looking at it here, and what's not a bad office, if you don't mind me saying?

No, well, it is somewhere where I tend to go and sit and do some work, so people get a bit envious when they're sitting there and it's a beautiful summer's day. It's just so. So this is going to be the location of all the free fish and chips today, the Pilot Bay. That's right. The fish is all supplied from East Rock in Gisborne. Freshly caught yesterday. There's about 40 kilos coming in.

Oh, freshly caught. And it's all teraki. 40 kilos? You're cooking 40 kilos of fish? Well, the chef tells me today that he's got 40 kilos to do, so there's going to be plenty for people. I hope Mount Maunganui is ready to... I hope the mountain's ready to eat.

Being on the water, well, in fact, over the water... They're over the water. Over the water. You'd imagine the fish could jump straight into the deep fryer. No, I think you might be dreaming. Yeah, don't get silly with it, Johnno. No, no, come on, go on. The fish have been prepared nicely by our friends in Gisborne.

Yeah, right, they're not jumping out of the water. What sort of idiot would say that? Oh, it looks like an amazing, amazing place. We're so gutted that we can't leave Auckland and come down and be there. But you could. You could just write a whole lot of pieces of paper and arrive at the border and say I'm going on a journey to check some fish out. Yeah, so we're in a gang.

I don't know if that works. All right. No, no, no, no, no, no. Just present a whole lot of paper and they'll let you through. Thanks, Mark. Well, as Mark said, if we just came with lots of A4 paper, you'd let us through. Yeah, yeah. Hey, Mark, listen, well, thank you so much for doing this today.

We really appreciate it. We're excited. And the Pilot Bay Fish and Chips are open seven days a week, pretty much 11.30 every day through to 8 o'clock, 9 o'clock at night in the middle of summer. Sometimes we stay open longer. So, yeah, best fish and chips in town. Awesome.

Right beside the actual mountain, in the mountain. Go there today. Over the water. Over the water. Yeah, over the water. 12 to 2 with Heinz Tomato Ketchup. Thanks so much for your time. Alright brother, thank you. See you mate.

So awesome, get along there today between 12 and 2, all thanks to Heinz Tomato Ketchup. Packed full of tomatoes which makes it thick. Now there's going to be a mountain of the Mount Maunganui, but a mountain of fish, 40 kilograms. That's a lot to get through. So you better be hungry Mount Maunganui today but a mountain of fish, 40 kilograms. That's a lot to get through. So you better be

hungry, Mount Maunganui, today from 12 o'clock. As painful as entering a password on your TV remote, one letter at a time. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. We promised our $100 notes for 100 days of lockdown.

It's actually a bank transfer. I couldn't handle it. Oh, yeah, sitting cash is not great. Yeah, so you need to give us your account number. Anyway, this is behind-the-scenes stuff, you know, back-of-shop stuff, but let's get Ray on. Welcome to 0800 The Hits, Ray. Good morning.

How's it going? We're doing well, and you've got $100. How good. Thank you. Just for saying words out of your mouth into our tartingers. But we were talking about where you've been stuck, because obviously 100 days of lockdown, many people have been locked down and stuck in one location.

But your son found himself stuck at school. Yeah, well, actually at daycare. So he made probably one of the worst first impressions ever. So first day at daycare, and he managed to get his head stuck in a gate. So it's one of those gates, if you can imagine, with the metal going from top to bottom. So he thought it would be a good idea. I think he got excited by some sirens that were going past,

and so he thought he would try and check them out. No matter how old you are, you always go, could I get my head into that? Don't you? It's always a thing that runs through the back of your head. And it ran in his head and he put his head through it. What happened? How did they get him out of the gate?

It took quite some time. You know, obviously they tried putting a bit of Vaseline, oil, anything they could find lying around to try and get the greasiness going because his ears kept getting jammed. After getting so excited after hearing the

sirens, he ended up getting his own sirens. They had to get the fire truck along. Oh, to cut him out? Yeah. They didn't want to use, you know, anything, like two bigger tools or anything. They just used a saw in the end. Was he all right?

Yeah, no, he was totally fine. I thought you were going to say you now have a boy who has a gate permanently attached to his head. No, but, hey, Daycare was such troopers about it. They actually gave us a book, and it's all about this dad who got his head stuck in the gate. So yeah, he's got

some memorabilia. Yeah, that's wonderful. Good stuff. And in that situation if anyone goes who's got some Vaseline? And you're the person with a tub of Vaseline. Why? That would be my first. If I said Juliet got her head stuck in the computer or something damn it, we need some Vaseline. You know That would be my first If I said

You know Juliet got her head Stuck in the computer Or something Damn it We need some Vaseline Who's got some And Ben went

Here's a kilograms Worth of Vaseline You know I'll sort Juliet out first But then afterwards I'd be like Hey mate Bail that

Commercial tub of Vaseline You carry around Why would you bring that around Hey for Moments like this That's what I'd say Ray that was a wonderful story I'm glad your son's alright right and you got $100.

You're going to have a great day. Thank you so much, guys. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from sex on the hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Brought to you by Resene, New Zealand's most trusted paint. Kiwi made since 1946.