Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: Who woke up with a crayfish in their bed

Episode Date: May 12, 2022

We play the 10 second game from the TV show The Cube, Ben's daughter wrote a very cute note, Jono has a puppy update and we take your spooky calls for Friday the 13th which included a crayfish in a bed.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. G'day there, welcome to the podcast. 13th of May today. It's a Friday the 13th, and we put a lot of weight on that, don't we, in the radio industry? Yeah. Friday the 13th. Pulls you through a couple of breaks during the show, doesn't it? Yeah, Friday the 13th, you're right. Yeah, you, uh, what's the worst bit of luck you've had, Ben Boyce? Like, bad luck?

Bad luck, yeah. Oh, jeez. Not bad, you know, things. Well, you put a digger through my house, that was probably bad luck? Bad luck yeah. Oh jeez well you put a digger through my house that was probably bad luck for my house and bad luck for you so for both of us everyone involved in that was bad luck for TV3 at the time that was probably a bit of bad luck

it probably doesn't get much worse than that there is obviously some things but that's probably a good light a light one now to talk about on the radio podcast. No, I want to go real dark. You know, the heart-wrenching stuff. Worst thing that's happened to you, Bill? What do you reckon?

Maybe a bad one. Some people really do have a run of it, don't they? You know, personally, in their lives, with things happening, job losses, family and stuff, and you're like, sometimes the universe, I think, only throws things to people who can handle them. That's a good way of looking at it.

That's what you always say to someone who's having a shitty time. The universe only throws things. Yeah, it does feel like some people get into that and get one thing after another, which is horrible. And you're like, how are you still functioning? Yeah. You know?

Yeah. What are you thinking about over there? Well, one time I was thinking of, it's very trivial. I remember dropping a bottle of, like, vodka when I was a student, and that was pretty unlucky. That was, like, my weekend down the, literally on the footpath. That's bad luck, though. That's bad luck.

I mean, out of everything that's happened in your life. Oh, it's probably more deep. I was trying to think of something light. No, but you're right. You've gone like me. You don't want to go too deep. You don't want to go, you know? This is a podcast intro.

I did buy a new car once. It wasn't brand new. It was a second-hand car. And then, like, it was a few years ago. And then it broke down and I had to get this big part for it. That was pretty rough. You know, you want to go, my parents broke up. I went to jail, you know, and caught Casey.

Things like that. You want to get into those things? That's probably exactly what I wanted. What about you, mate? What's your worst part? Well, I was trying to think about that. I can see why you've ended up there. You can see why Bell's thing was perfect for what I want

to talk about right now. Okay, one time I arrived back from, I was at radio school and I flew back from Wellington to Auckland and my friend Rob actually picked me up from the airport and I was so excited to be back with my friend and we drove me up from the airport, and I was so excited to be back with my friend. And we drove all the way back home.

This is talking a 40-minute drive from the airport. And in the rush of excitement, I'd left my bag on the carousel. So I had to turn back around and go back to the airport. Oh, see, I never just... No, I was like, hey, mate, how are you? I just completely forgot that I came with luggage. Like, what idiot forgets they brought luggage on a plane and just wandered his car and we're off

and... Is that bad luck or is that just being forgetful? Yeah, yeah. I think you've kind of mixed it up there. Yeah. Do you know the...

Oh, sorry. No, no, it's true. You're right. Good story. Speaking of luggage, I know we've gone into a luggage tangent right now,

but what I found incredible was, because we had family over from the States and my wife's brother, he came safe. It was about 10 days, two weeks.

Just carry on. One of them had just carry on. Just all the way It was for 10 days, two weeks. Just carry on. One of them, he'd just carry on. Just all the way from America. For two weeks, just to carry on. I'm like, I couldn't even do that

for a night. No. He brought it over for himself. Yeah. It was like, yeah. But what about Pat? I was like,

what if he, what if it, you know. And he didn't seem to like, it wasn't an occasion where he was like, oh, I need this or I did this thing. Was he washing a lot? Yeah, he did probably wash. He probably used to say, oh mate, he's using the yeah, no. And it didn't seem to, like, it wasn't an occasion where he was like, oh, I need this or I did this thing.

Was he washing a lot? Yeah, he did probably wash. He probably used to say, oh, mate, he's using the washing machine again. Is this a passive-aggressive dig that? No, but not, you know. But I was like, that's incredible because I'm just, I'm the worst packer. Carry on from America. I'm the worst packer.

Oh, I'd be bringing nine suitcases. Yeah, totally. Because you're like, what if this happens? What if this? We're going out for dinner. You know, all that sort of stuff. I was like, that's incredible.

What did he have in there? Everything he needed? Well, according to him, he did. Jersey's jacket? He even had a bike helmet. Is he shopping?

He bought a bike helmet. Because he's a cyclist and so he borrowed one of our bikes and went off and he just likes running and doing triathlons and stuff.

So he had a bike helmet. A bike? Oh, jeez. But he didn't have any. This guy is a packing god. I know, I was like, how do you do that? And his toiletries. Yeah, all of it in there.

It was a bag that you could take through, basically you could take through his carry-on, yeah. That is, well, that's the most impressive thing I've heard in the last 10 years. Yeah, I thought it was quite good, yeah. Yeah, you wouldn't get a more impressive packing story than that. Yeah, but enjoy the podcast, there we go.

We've gone around In circles beforehand But enjoy The show where the masks Make them look A whole lot better Jono and Ben On the hits

We were just talking About the scar That I got on my head Got a mole cut out Ben's like It gives the show Some cred It does

Scar head Yeah Yeah Until you say I got a mole cut out It's a pretty big scar It is a big scar, yeah. And that happens.

It's life. It is life, yeah. But you're right, it does give the show some cred. Maybe we should do a new photo shoot. You just pointing out the scar. Just be like, you know. And we just never say what happened. Prison tats and prison scars.

Yeah, just leave it mysterious. Hey, now, I did go on the air three weeks ago bragging about the cheapest pair of jeans I had ever purchased. $22 jeans. The recommended retail value sitting at $199. I don't know what happened there. The shopping gods. It's an amazing deal, isn't it? Incredible deal.

Now, Producer Bee Humps, you came in the week prior bragging about a $30 jacket you purchased. It was wonderful. I wear it all the time, too. Get a lot of wear out of it. I have never seen that camouflage jacket again, have you? It's because it's camouflage. You've never seen mine. But producer Bee Humps was also saying about your jeans too,

that if he bought those jeans, he'd have to spend more money on getting them taken up. Yeah, because I've got short legs and I had to go to take my jeans to the tailor. So your $22.50 jeans would actually cost me... $42.50. $42.50, yeah. $62.50 jeans would actually cost me... $42.50. $42.50, yeah. $62.50.

It costs $40 to get them taken out. Yeah, it varies. Yeah, roughly $40. Still a bargain. $62 jeans. It's a good price for jeans. You love the name of the place that I take it to.

Oh, go on. Alter Ego. Oh, Alter Ego is the old... Yeah, nice. I always wanted to call my tailor Taylor Swift, you know. So they do it within like 60 minutes and that was the whole thing. But I think Taylor Swift, the record person,

would probably have some problems with that. Yeah, but also a 60-minute tailor, shocking. Everything would just be done in a flap. Everything's done in 60 minutes. You want your pants taken off? Come see Taylor Swift. It would be very handy because it's usually a three or four-day wait. Oh, mate, not a Taylor Swift, mate.

You'd probably just slice them off at the bottom. There you go, mate. That's the thing, right? It's quite a process just to take you through. So you buy a pair of jeans. You've got to take them home and wash them so you can get any shrinkage out. Oh, do you wash them first? You've got to wash them first because if you get them taken up and then they shrink,

you end up with bloody... Levi Strauss always said, never wash your jeans. And put them in the freezer, they say. Yeah, but that's grubby, isn't it? Yeah, I mean, it seems like an unusual process. Yeah, I don't know. Just don't wash them that often. So you wash them?

So wash them, then take them to the tailor. Then you've got a four-day wait. Then you've got to wait for the next calendar event for something nice to wear some nice jeans to. Yeah, right. So it's a wait to get them. Well, these new jeans, they are great. But the problem is they're really tight.

They're running a tight operation. They do loosen up. Yeah, I know. But at the moment when I sit in the car, it feels like I'm in a child's harness. So I'm having to unbutton them as I drive, you know, just to loosen them up. Why are you looking at me strangely did you buy a cheap pair of jeans that you didn't need that were the wrong size

I think he did just because you got lured by the price tag I've squeezed my legs into these I have to drive with them with the button undone they were $22.50 because they were child's jeans I was at Cotton On Kids.

Give them to me. But then I have to put, because I can't do the button up while I'm sitting down, so I have to get out of the car. And at the doctor's the other day, I was having to do this out in the car park,

and I caught the eye of a passing pedestrian. And they're like, buddy, it's never a good look buttoning up your trousers when you've got out of your car. Spy.

Know what's up. Spy.co.nz. She may not have a trench coat or a fancy gadget watch, but she can still spy. Belle Crawford, what's happening? Fun fact. Do you remember that movie Harriet the Spy? Harriet the Spy?

It was a movie in the 90s. Sorry, a bit of a niche 90s reference there. Let's have a look at Harriet the Spy. It was massive, and I used to watch it and then pretend I was a spy afterwards in the garden. Anyway, it's just a random thing. Oh, Harriet the Spy. There we go. It was massive. It was huge. watch it and then pretend I was a spy afterwards in the garden. Anyway, it's just a random thing. Oh, Harriet, there we go. It was massive. It was huge.

Yeah, right. A child spy. Yeah. Anyway. How old was she? Oh, maybe like 9 or 10. Oh, yeah, Rotten Tomatoes has given it a 48%. It was better than that. 48%.

48% is quite low, isn't it? Top Gun's just received 100%. Yeah, it's 100% so far, but it hasn't come out there officially. But I guess everyone that's seen it so far and has joined Scientology has given it 100%. Well, it's 100% so far, but it hasn't come out there officially. But I guess everyone that's seen it so far and has joined Scientology has given it 100%. Well, not Harriet the Spy, mate. She's getting a reaming.

Also, Adele, she doesn't really share much about her personal life, but she has posted some photos with her boyfriend. He's a millionaire sports agent called Rich Paul and also announced

that she's bought a new house and they're moving in together. Big milestone. In one of the photos, they're holding a set of keys outside their new home. It's a mansion in LA. Get this, worth 98 million New Zealand dollars. And it used to be owned by Sylvester Stallone, the actor. Now, yeah, producer Behump showed me an article on this before.

Now, so he owned the house and he had a huge bronze statue of, a rocky statue of him by the pool. You know, like in a Rocky pose, a big statue. And TMZ had flown a helicopter over there and the statue's still there. He didn't take it with him. So she's got a statue of Sylvester Stallone like Rocky with the boxing gloves outside the pool. But pretty cool, I reckon. Well, if I came to your house and you had a giant statue of you in the backyard.

But it's not. Well, yeah, but I. But, you know, like even if you were friends with Sylvester Stallone, he's like, come over for a barbecue. You're like, what's that? Oh, it's just a giant statue of myself. It's very self-indulgent. I mean, it's great for Adele and Rich Paul,

because they can be like, look, it's a giant statue of Sylvester. Yeah, I've got a big fiberglass cow on my backyard. Yeah, and it's a great talking point, isn't it? But it's not of me, is it? Yeah, well, it was a big fiberglass statue of you. You'd be like, oh, okay, that's a bit weird. In fact, if there's a great talking point, isn't it? But it's not of me, is it? Yeah, well, it was a big fiberglass statue of you. You'd be like, oh, okay, that's a bit weird. In fact, if there was a statue of you, it would just be that thing that's outside Godfrey's vacuum cleaners.

You know that thing, the wind, with the wavy arms? The arm just did a perfect one. I wish this was a radio sometimes so you could see. That was so good. Also, the number one show on Netflix at the moment is Ozark. There are some new episodes. People love this show. And Julia Garner plays one of the main characters.

She was also on Inventing Anna, which you may have watched. And she talks about playing the villain. I know everyone's like, oh, yeah, poor Ruth. But I'm like, guys, she murdered her uncles. But I don't think, like, when you're playing a villain, I don't think that person thinks that they're bad i think they they kind of have a reasoning for their action yeah that's the same thing when i watched cruella on disney because you know cruella's been painted as this nasty nasty character but then you see the backstory and you're like oh it kind of makes sense see why

cruella is like have you seen cruella? Yeah, I love that movie. It's really good, eh? I watched it again the other day on the weekend. It's so good, and all the covers of the songs. Yeah, it's a very cool movie. And the boys that she hangs out with, they're really funny. Yeah, no, it's good, it's good. But Ozark, I haven't seen that. It always flashes up on my Netflix. Has it got Bateman in it?

Yeah, just Bateman, yeah. Yeah. I've seen the first series, but people, you're right, people love it. Yeah, it could be something to check out. Add to your watch list this weekend. And you can get more Spy at thehits.co.nz. And it's Rihanna. You're on The Hits.

John O'Bien, 623. I was reading yesterday her and Britney Spears are planning playdates already for when their babies are born. They'll be like, hey, we're going to have babies around about the same time. Plan some playdates. That's nice. I always find those baby groups that you go to

before you've had a child, they always try and make you all be friends, don't they? I've made some friends out of that. Did you? Yeah. Did you? Yeah, Krista, who we know really well. Oh, is he from the baby group? Yeah, that's how I met Krista. What if you get a dud group, though? I'm not saying we had a dud group or anything, but

you're like, all we have in common is we fornicated roughly around about the same time. And we're all stressing out about being parents together. Let's all do this as a group. It was really good. I found my wife, Amanda, found it really good when, you know, because when the baby was born, you go back to, you know, I went back to work and she had obviously someone going,

people go through the same things as she was, you know, reach out, go for coffee, things like that. Yeah, well, I take back anything I said about that. I didn't realise you met Christa through the baby group. Christa, he's great. Ben, I was watching The Cube the other night on TVNZ1, the only channel that finds itself rating nowadays for some reason, mainly because the audience hasn't found streaming services.

Or a remote to know how to change channels. But The Cube, great great show hosted by the guy he's a new zealander yeah he is and i forget the name of it oh well this is your this is your content you bring the show phil someone is that phil yeah yeah phil so he's phil from new zealand oh yeah i know phil from new zealand well he's on the show and he's a wonderful host phil phil scoffer also hosts good morning britain well. Yeah, he's a Kiwi. Yeah, he's a Kiwi. He's been over there for many years, though.

That was a great job. One of the biggest TV presenters over there, right? Yeah. And so the Cube, I don't know if you've seen it. Basically, they put people in this giant Perspex box, and they have to do certain challenges in a high-pressure, race-against-time situation. And it always feels like it's on the verge of turning into a Saw movie or something.

I've locked you in this box and you must... But, you know, fun little challenges. And there was this simple game the other night that they got one of the contestants to do. Have a listen to our dear friend Philip Schofield explaining the rules. All you've got to do is to count to ten. You have a second's leeway.

So it's 9.5 to 10.5 if you're ready best of luck let's play so in your head you have to count to 10 and then when you think you've reached 10 you say stop but you've got a second so you can oh so you've got to count to basically to the exact moment that 10 seconds would pass yeah you can't just can you count to 10 yeah i can oh which uh you know it already seems like quite a hard task, but I can't even count to 10, so it was already difficult for me. Right. And you've got a second, so you can land between 9.5 and 10.5 when you say stop.

Oh, so trying to get exactly 10 seconds counting to 10. Yeah, you can play along in your car as well. You know, why don't you concentrate on this and not driving? So, Ben, I've got my clock on my phone here. Okay. And I've got the stopwatch going. You say go when you want to go. Okay.

Three, two, one, go. Okay, Ben, he's slowly counting in his head. He's got his eyes shut. He's using his hands up and down. Just say stop when you're ready. Stop. 10.82.

Oh! That's close. So I was just over that. 10 point bell. Do you want to have a go? Okay, cool. Okay. That was very close.

Okay. All right. You two go. Three, two, one. Then say go and I'll start the clock. Go. All right.

Here we go. Bell Crawford now. She's kind of just Staring into the distance You can see her Mumbling away to herself Concentrating Yeah trying to get

Bang on 10 seconds It's quite distracting Stop 9.57 Oh you did it She got it You did it It was between 9.5 and 10.5

You did it You just scraped through What a great game So basic It's on his turn Okay I'll have a go Do you want my phone Okay Okay I'll count a go. Do you want my phone?

Okay. I'll count you down from three. Three, two, one, go. Here we go. Jono Pryor. He's always, it's like he's meditating. He's not talking, his eyes are shut. Enjoy this, New Zealand.

He's not talking and it's time for talking on the radio. Oh. you did it stop he was too busy commentating oh 12.16 sorry that one's on me that's over around

about 10 seconds sorry oh there we go so you can play that at work today at morning tea sorry that's on me

that's why I never got that gig we were looking for someone from New Zealand that could do TV well we can't get Ben we'll get Phil Schofield. He can't even stop a clock.

Jonas Internet Wormhole. Yeah, the internet, it's a thing, isn't it? And you usually get lost in wormholes. Yesterday I got click baited. I'm getting a lot of, I did a couple of days ago, click on medical trial ad saying you want money to use your body for medicine. And I just keep getting fed all these things like it's not too late you can still earn a hundred dollars a week once you click on something it's they just keep relentless yeah it is isn't it you click on like one jacket on a shop

bombarded for about four months until they bully you into buying it yeah totally yeah it's a great tactic but uh yeah the article i got lost on was uh it was kind of facts about the U.S. prison system. And it was just stuff that you wouldn't know necessarily about going to prison. Ben, this might be useful for you in the future. You need to know some of this stuff. So I'm about to sentence you to three minutes of hard prison facts. The U.S. prison system costs $80 billion a year to run. $80 billion?

$80 billion. Wow. There is 2.3 million Americans in prison. So pretty much close to half the population of New Zealand. Half of the team of 5 million locked away in prison. That's a massive country, though. It is a huge country, but it's got one-fifth of the world's prison population are in prison. That's a massive country though. It is a huge country, but it's got one-fifth of the world's prison population are in America.

They chuck people in prison also, willy-nilly. Of those 2.3 million, they say that 230,000 people, so nearly a quarter of a million people, are innocent. Serving time for something they didn't do.

The people that are in there. 230 are presumed innocent and probably about 2 million say they are innocent. Serving time for something they didn't do. What, the people that are in there? Yeah, no, that's 230, I presume, and probably about 2 million say they are innocent. Exactly, everyone says they are. Bluetech and chewing gum? Don't even think about taking those into prison, mate. Do you like hanging up your posters on walls? When you're going to have to use toothpaste.

Oh, really? That's what they do. What about Bluetech you could use for? Well, apparently they can mould, like if the prison officers use a key, they could put that in there and mould it, harden it up, I don't know what they do in prison, and turn it into a key. Yeah. So they've got minty fresh walls hanging out their posters. What else was interesting?

You like drinking? Do you want some prison alcohol? Well, yeah. Because they talk about prison wine and stuff like that. Hooch. It's called Hooch. And it's bread, juice, and fruit. But you've got to be very careful.

It's on a knife's edge the whole time because it explodes. Really? In an instant. So they make it themselves. Secretly would make it. Yeah, I don't know how you get an abundance of bread, juice, and fruit. And I suppose when they have their meals, they can stockpile it. Save it away, yeah.

Yeah, and the top bunk. I know when you're a child, the top bunk is the most prestigious of all sleeping positions, isn't it? Yeah. When you're there for a sleepover, but not in prison. Top bunk's the lesser of the two. Oh, really? That's where all the new prisoners go on the top bunk,

because the bottom one, you're able to put sheets down and create your own little area. Your own little private area. I always get paranoid sleeping on the bottom one, you're able to put sheets down and create your own little area. A little private area. I always get paranoid sleeping on the bottom bunk that at some stage the thing's going to collapse. Collapse down. Me too. Yeah, like this thing, if it doesn't hold up, it could collapse. But there's high risk on the top one you're going to roll off.

Yeah. Which has happened to many children over the years. You've got a big thump and you're like, oh God. I've done it. Have you rolled off yet? I think every Kiwi child has rolled off. It's a dangerous place

to be sleeping as a kid. It is. Two metres in the air. It's wild. What about the kids up there? They're not sleeping. What about them up there?

See how much they move around in the night. That's really interesting facts. Here we go. That's the US prison system brought to you by the internet. Who would have thought you would have heard that

on the radio on a Friday morning? Scrolling through your feed. All right, he's cruising for a news, and here he is, Ben Boyce. So I was reading this story. This happened in Florida a couple of days ago. So air traffic controllers got a very panicked, urgent call on the radio from a passenger on a small plane, and the passenger revealed the pilot was too sick to handle the controls,

and there was just the two of them on the very small plane. As in he got travel sickness? I don't know. They haven't really revealed too much about why the pilot was sick. He's obviously got really sick and he couldn't handle the controls. And so this poor guy, the passenger, had to panic call the air control people and they were like, well, calm down. First thing they do, tell you to calm down.

And you're like, well, I can't calm down. Do you know, I'm flying a plane with no experience. were like, well, calm down. First thing they do, tell you to calm down. You're like, well, I can't calm down. Do you know, I'm flying a plane with no experience. Don't tell me to calm down. They asked the guy for the plane's position. He's like, I don't know. The air? Yeah. Eventually, they spotted the small plane, and then controllers,

how's this, guided him to land safely with no experience, no pilot experience, and then guided him to land at the airport. That's pretty incredible. That is, it's also one of those situations where you're like, well, a pilot's gig might be a bit easier than we've all been led to believe. Maybe. Maybe there's a button you push.

Yeah, land. You know, for years they were like, oh, all these fancy buttons at the front. Yeah. Maybe it's like radio. Yeah, well, true. Oh, no, radio doesn't sound that hard, though, does it? No, no, that's true.

Maybe one of those cars that you've, you know cars that automatically parks and stuff, something like that. How would you go landing a plane? Oh, not good. I'd be like the panic call I'd be good at. I'd definitely make a panic call, but actually landing, no good at all. We did a flight simulator just down the road here a few years ago. Oh, you did that? You were part of the ad campaign, weren't you?

Yeah, I took a photo. I took a photo with my thumbs up saying, it was fun. It was really good. It was really good. It was really good. I had a pilot's hat on and everything. But basically, you can land a plane

virtually in any airport in the world. And jeez, I tell you what, many lives perished on my Boeing 747 as we landed on Tokyo. And just quickly,

a Canadian politician, he's apologised for appearing remotely in a bathroom during a parliament question time. So he was on Zoom and he Zoomed on in and everyone recognised that from the background. They were like, hey, that's the toilets at work. Wouldn't he just go into the meeting room? I don't know. Maybe he forgot about it.

Maybe he just answered it and he just go into the meeting room? I don't know. Maybe he forgot about it. Maybe he just answered it and he was still in the bathroom. That's when you definitely need that suspicious blurry background. Yes. I noticed the Prime Minister's doing blurry background with all her interviews this week from home. She's isolating from home. You're like, what are you hiding behind there? Because last year another Canadian Liberal politician

apologised after he was caught urinating during their virtual audio video, sorry, proceedings. And a month earlier, he had appeared naked on a video call with colleagues while changing after going for a run. And so he's no longer seeking re-election. He's like, oh, no, there's nothing. That's going to come up in all the debates.

Remember that time you were naked on Zoom? OK, you win this one. Well done. It's Jono and Ben, but FYI, ben is open to other options jonathan ben on the hits there are a lot of negatives about covid weren't there let's be honest yeah i mean august gone no but there was a couple of positives uh one of them being that you could blame covid on stuff you know we could blame you know a lot of businesses were able to get away with shoddy service while covid you know delays uh we could blame shoddy radio covid you know, a lot of businesses were able to get away with shoddy service. Well, COVID, you know, delays.

We could blame shoddy radio. COVID, you know, everything was, sorry, I couldn't make it. COVID. You loved that excuse for a while there because you don't like going out and seeing people. Being locked down was an absolute treat for me. So you're like, I can't, it's COVID. I'd love to come, but I can't. It's COVID.

But I have been meaning to drop off a birthday present to a friend of ours for four months. It's been sitting in the boot of my car. Four months. Now, there was a time there I was able to blame COVID because we had COVID. I was like, oh, COVID, sorry, you know, but be not come, you know. There was lockdowns. There was all sorts going on. Yeah.

And it's only like, it's just a 15 minute job. It's just after work, I just need to swing by, put it in a letterbox and drive home. But I haven't done it. And I keep teasing the person with, hey, I've got your birthday present. And it's been going on for four months. And I don't know what point I go,

well, should I just write it out till next year's birthday? Yeah, you probably do. No, you've promised and you're not delivering. So you need to just drop it off. And say, sorry, it's so late. No, wait for next birthday. Wait for next birthday. And then you're like, here's your birthday present.

And hopefully they've forgotten. Bell's always brought these morals to the show, Ben. We didn't have morals. We didn't have morals before, have we? We used to leave the morals at the door. But yeah, like Ben Boyce's theory. He's like, write it out. They'll forget about it.

It's been four months. They're probably like, oh, I've had a couple of emails of him taunting me with a birthday present. Got your birthday present. I get the award for worst friend ever. Do you drop birthday presents? Are you a birthday present guy for people? Because we have an arrangement where we don't gift each other presents.

Not necessarily. No. No, not. I mean, if you're going to someone's party and they're like, hey, it's my birthday, then I would. But if it wasn't just like a, apart from immediate family, I wouldn't probably send a birthday present just for the sake of it. When you do get a present, you buy your thoughtful about the present. I find that. Do I?

Me? Yeah, you. He gave me that Jesus soap last year. Yeah, Jesus. He gave me Jesus soap for Christmas because he's like, you're Catholic? Yeah. Proud Catholic. Well, yeah, you always talk about how you're, you know.

He says I'm a fake Catholic. Well, no, I just like that. Plastic Catholic. Plastic for us. And it was soap to wash away all your sins. Yeah, it was Jesus soap. Yeah, so I thought it was good for us. And it was soap to wash away all your sins. It was Jesus soap. Yeah, so I thought it was good for you.

It was touching. You got your kids into a better school because you pretend to be Catholic. Pretend to be a plastic Catholic. I knew him before the kids were going to school. And I was like, he was never going to church on a Sunday. Have they been baptized? And then all of a sudden he was like, yeah. Yeah. Of course they have.

We go to school. We're proud Catholics. Do you go to mass every Sunday? Do we? No, since he got the kids in the school, he doesn't go unless he's told to go. But you wouldn't just go, on the Sunday, you wouldn't just go, would you?

But if you're a proud Catholic, you would. So you place the Catholic. Yeah, exactly. Are we running late for news? I think we are. I know we're actually a bit early, but anyway. Just play some ads. I'm done.

I'm done with this conversation. How did it end up here? It is the hits. I think we are. I know we're actually a bit early, but anyway. Just play some ads. I'm done. I'm done with this conversation. How did it end up here? It is the hits. Your essential listening for non-essential banter. Jono and Ben on the hits. Yesterday, you guys got me really good. You told me earlier in the week there was a last minute interview coming through from Keeping Up With The Kardashians with Kourtney Kardashian.

Yeah, yeah. One of the stars of one of the biggest family in the world. You couldn't make the interview, which turned out, well, basically, because you were pranking me, really. Yeah, we got the world's premier Kourtney Kardashian impersonator.

So it wasn't Kourtney Kardashian. I had prepared for an interview with Kourtney Kardashian. It wasn't Kourtney Kardashian. And jeez. You still haven't gotten over that, have you? No. He was so nervous.

Yeah, I was nervous at the start of doing this interview and then obviously now I'm even more nervous because there's videos out there you can see on the It's Breakfast

Instagram and Facebook of me just tanking an interview because you made it so awkward for me. Well, if you missed it yesterday, here's how it all played out.

Hi, this is Alison from Hulu Promotions. Hi. I'm sorry, running behind schedule. Oh, no worries.

Hey, it's Belle calling from the Hits. I've got Ben here for his interview with Kourtney Kardashian. I'm sorry, running behind schedule. Oh, no worries. Hey, it's Belle calling from the hits. I've got Ben here for his interview with Kourtney Kardashian. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Give me a couple moments. I'm going to go grab her. Kind of running on tight schedule.

We're trying to get a lot of promotions out here. So just five minutes, five to eight minutes would be great. All right? Awesome. Awesome. Thank you very much for this. Appreciate this. No problem, of course.

All right, give me just like five seconds. Okay, thank you. Hi. Oh, Kourt. This is Kourtney. Hey, Kourtney. So nice to talk to you. this no problem of course all right give me just like five seconds thank you hi oh courtney hey courtney so nice to talk to you i'm being from jonah i'm being in new zealand oh my god i love your accent brian yeah that's uh i love your accent as well it's so funny We just don't hear people like that in Calabasas. I mean, so where in New Zealand are you guys? I'm based in Auckland here at the Hits Radio Station. I'm sorry, what was that?

Oh, sorry. Yeah, the New Zealand accent is not always the best. I'm in Auckland. Sorry, it's kind of hard to understand. Auckland, near the top of the country. Oh, the top. That's where I like to be. All right, we're getting some exclusives right now. Now, Keeping Up with the Kardashians, incredible 280 episodes over that.

What's the secret to getting to 20 episodes? 20 series, sorry. Yeah, no, it's fine. You're just confused a little bit no I just I'm not I just can't answer that right and yeah I mean I was driving into work this morning and I saw you on a billboard in New Zealand is it crazy to think that you are on a billboard in a country across the world? I mean, you couldn't walk down the streets without being recognized, right? I mean, wait, so you're telling me that you saw me in New Zealand? Yeah, on a billboard.

Yeah. Was the billboard like attractive? I feel like I'm just, I cannot believe that I'm in New Zealand. Like, I didn't approve of that. Oh, but no, but it was from publicity for your show. It wasn't just, yeah, that was publicity for Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Yeah. Yeah.

Travis Barker, I mean, you guys seem so happy together. It's great to see you together. I imagine as a boyfriend, he takes care of all the small things you know i'm so sorry it's just you you said travis and yeah i was what are you okay no yeah no i'm fine sorry it's just we, we just had a really big fight this morning and it was just, yeah, no, it's fine. I'm so sorry. I mean, it's not like, yeah. I'm sorry.

I just had a really hard day. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. I'm so, I'm sorry. I won't. I just thought it was a happy thing to bring up. And I was like, cause I know they said no personal questions. I cannot do this interview anymore. Like, I'm dying.

Oh, no, don't. No, you, like, signed me up for this. I don't even understand him. What show is this? Like, I did not know. Hello? Hello, hello. Sorry, are you talking to me or are you talking to someone else?

I'm sorry. I thought this was muted I didn't mean to offend you there I was just talking about something that I thought was obviously I'm sorry I didn't want to get things off to the right on the wrong you know on the wrong foot there so sorry well hey maybe you won't after that but would you love to come to New Zealand sometime you know we'd love to have you here. I just, I mean, no, probably not.

I like can't even answer that right now. No, I like. I'm so sorry. You're the worst. You're the worst. I cannot do any more interviews. Cut it off. Like I'm done.

Is she gone i'm yeah no i'm i'm i'm so sorry i'm just like like half crying i'm pmsing travis is crazy i can barely understand you like i'm tired oh um are you okay um yeah uh. Well, let's talk about something else. Yeah. You endorsed a product in New Zealand a while back, a skin care line. Yeah. So, yeah. That was my product?

Oh, my God. I'm impressed that you know that. Well, I was trying to research the... Am I late for the Kourtney Kardashian interview? Are you anything to do... What is going on? This is Andrea Lopez. Who's Andrea?

She's the world's premier Kourtney Kardashian impersonator. Oh my goodness, he's just not Kourtney Kardashian. Hi Ben, how are you? I'm going a little better now knowing that it was you and I haven't offended one of the most famous people on the planet. I knew I got you when we got the skincare line jumbled up. I didn't even know what I was saying for a while. No, you threw me.

When you started crying about Trish, I was like, oh God, oh God, oh God. And after that, I was like, let's god oh god and after that i was like let's just end it i respect the press that you did oh well thank you and i respect the uh the fact that you pranked me really well uh that's good let's just all say we're all speaking to each other if you want to see the video of my awkward face and my reactions as i was getting pranked by that courtney kardashian impersonator you can check it out right now at The Hits Breakfast on Instagram and Facebook. Spy. Know what's up.

Spy.co.nz. It's like a celebrity laundromat where we air all the dirty laundry. Belle Crawford, what's happening? Maybe you're planning on catching up on Netflix watch list over the weekend. Well, you are being warned. You know how Netflix has been saying for ages,

oh, time's up. You're not going to be able to share accounts much longer. It's been fast-tracked. You've only got a few months left of scabbing off someone's account. I thought they were just going to trial it in some wonderful South American country. They're trying to bait it, they're like, we're bringing it in. No, there was this email, an internal email, which has been leaked to the New York Times,

and initially it was going to happen within two years. Now it's a matter of months. By the end of the year, you'll have one password per account, essentially, for a person. And other people won't be able to, like, you won't be able to register on one device, essentially. Well, they're losing hundreds of millions of dollars, hand over fist at the moment, Netflix, aren't they?

Pulling all sorts of projects that they were halfway through filming. And I always get nervous. I've always wanted to leak an email. That's been one thing I've always wanted to do, but I'll get too nervous that they could track where the leak came from. What do you mean, leak an email? Well, you know, like a personal company email, if they're like, you know, Bogsy, the CEO, sends out some information. I've always

wanted to leak. I've always wanted to be a leaker. Oh, right. Yeah. Never had the I've never been able to do it. Some of those have i remember during covert there were like some emails within the company that were like they could not be forwarded they sort of had this protection on them yeah i suppose you can just take a photo of your screen though can't you well that's maybe that's my way around it no it doesn't trace back screenshot or something i actually heard netflix they were looking at potentially another cheaper option for Netflix. I don't exactly know how that works.

Yeah, so they're going to introduce a cheaper tier. They haven't said how much yet. Also advertising, which I think like it's kind of crap if you're paying for a subscription and then they're advertising. Sky TV did it though, didn't they? I mean, eventually, you know, there's the pressures of commercialism falls upon anyone. I get it.

But maybe if they were advertising the shows maybe more than an ad, I would probably be okay with that. I'm always like, just get the products in the show. Yeah. Integration. Well, yeah, they do that a few times, don't they? Yeah, but just make that the way that they earn their cash. What are you holding there, Bill?

Save it for the CEO. I'll send that in a leaked email. What are you drinking here? I'm drinking a lovely, delicious can of, you know. What are you smoking there? Oh, this is a tasty, you know, just. Like real obvious. Wow, they're really endorsing these.

Where are you going? I'm going to Briscoe's. They're having a half price sale of Manchester. What about the murder that we're meant to solve? Yeah, we'll get to that. We'll get to bedding first. I need some towels. Such a gross sale.

I need some towels. Also, Kiwi comedian Melanie Bracewellwell who's doing pretty well for herself over in australia she accidentally dropped an f-bomb live on the project and why are we gonna play it it's bleeped out i was struck down with covid halfway through the festival which was a nightmare and then i came out and i was like oh i, I'm going to live it up. And I went to a restaurant. And the first night I went out, I choked on calamari at dinner. And I went, this will be a way to go. Oh my God. Love a live earphone on TV. They have bleep buttons though. That was dropped before. They have delays. Same on radio in Australia.

Oh, so it didn't even go to air? No, it did go to air. I think it did, but not in every state or something. So, yeah. They can, because I think they can run their, I think their radio runs like 20 seconds behind. Yeah, and there's dump buttons. Some wild Aussie shock jock says something.

Oh, mate, I'm out here, you know, doing it. And they can, you know, see. Some poor person just waiting with a camera. I think there is. And they can, you know, some poor person just waiting with a finger on his. I think there's like some, yeah. There's a show in Australia that has a sensor that's there

to press like a button when someone says something, yeah. I would be like, well, we've got this person here so we may as well use them. You know, just be saying all sorts of stuff.

Put them under the pump. And that is spy. You can get more now at thehits.co.nz. That is Jono and Ben on your Friday morning. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. It's Friday the 13th, and thanks to Neon,

there's a new TV series called Chucky. Remember Chucky, the little doll? Well, we've actually got some dolls to give away. There's a new series on Neon called Chucky today, and they talk, if I push the button right here. Hi, I'm Chucky. Want to play? Yeah, so there you go.

So if you want to win one of these Chucky dolls yeah and traumatize childhoods uh yeah it did scare me as a kid watching that movie but if you want to win that we want to know on 0800 the hits the thing that scares you the most what's the scariest story uh well i've shared this before with you and you don't believe it uh as a child uh i went to my friend's house and i did a seance and I thought my friend John McGinnis was asking me to come over and do science except he just wasn't pronouncing it properly and it turned out there's this Ouija board that we draw on so you do the

alphabet around the border and then you have yes or no and you have one to ten numbered as well and you put a coin in and then you call on those that have passed who may be living around the area and we got in touch with someone and you asked what you wanted for dinner or what you were having for dinner yeah not what i wanted for i knew what i wanted for dinner

but i said i wanted to put this to the test and i said ghosts what am i having for dinner at 12 years old? And it started spelling C-O-Q. Cock-o-von. Annie Pryor's signature range dish. So did anyone else but from you know what the signature range dish of... I have tasted cock-o-von many a times. And it's a it's a chicken dish it's almost like

a chicken stew you use a bit of wine and onions and things and I arrived home lo and behold what was on the dinner table

your mum's cock-a-barn mum's cock-a-barn and I was like what what what what what

what what what what what what what what

what what what what what what what what

what what what what what what what what

what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what mum's cock-a-doodle-doo and I was like wow sorry yeah so that was a scary story that's a really scary story it's particularly to tell on radio now today

that makes me really scared and frightened that's for sure so we want to know what your scary story is I was thinking about this yesterday and I've told you this many years ago Jono but when I was studying radio you could work 24 hours of the day in the building and I was thinking about this yesterday, and I've told you this many years ago, Jono, but when I was studying radio, you could work 24 hours of the day in the building,

and I was working there late one night in the studio downstairs just by myself. My flatmate was upstairs. He came down. He was like, I'll come back down in about 10, 15 minutes. We'll leave. And so I was working away one or two in the morning, and then suddenly the lights went off 10 minutes later

down the hallway, and I'm like, oh, mate, he's playing a prank on me. All right, I'll get him. So I waited around the corner, and as I walked down, I heard the footsteps and I'm like, oh mate, he's playing a prank on me, alright, I'll get him. So I waited around the corner and as I walked down I heard the footsteps, I jumped out and I don't know why I made this noise but I went, I weighed my arms around. It's a comedy noise. And it wasn't him, it was the security guard from the polytech and he got such a fright, the poor guy.

Yeah, you see he was quite elderly too. He sort of clutched this sort of heart region. He meant to show your ID as well, and he was like, here's my ID. He's like, I don't care, I don't care. I don't care, I'm having a heart attack. Call an ambulance. Yeah, the poor guy.

He was okay afterwards, but jeez, I felt bad about that. Okay, Friday the 13th, it's on. This is commercial radio gold. We're not going to let this slip us by. 0800 the hits. You know what, friends, you've got a chucky doll. Hard-hitting interviews and informed opinion. Mike Hosking on Newstalk ZV.

In the meantime, Jono and Ben on the hits. It is Friday the 13th. Thanks to Neon, they've got a new series called Chucky. We've got these quite creepy Chucky dolls from the original movie. It's in a new series. Here, it talks. Hi, I'm Chucky. Want to play?

It feels like one of those toys that if you left in a box for 35 years, it'll be worth about $1.2 million. Doesn't it look like something that you'd see at an auction in a few years' time? So to win one of those this morning, we've got more to give away after 8 o'clock. We wanted to know what scares you the most. Yeah, Donna, what happened? Well, I was six years old and my brother, who was 20, well, not quite, he was 19,

and he was babysitting, and I went to go to bed, and when I got into bed, I felt something moving at the end of my bed on my feet, and when I pulled back the covers, there was a live crayfish at the end of my bed. Oh, jeez. Yeah, and as a six-year-old, that scared the hell out of me. Well, you know, crayfish not traditionally located in the bottom of beds. No, no. So then he ran me a bath because I was so upset.

He thought it might calm me down with bubbles. An apology bath. Out of the bath. Yeah. The crayfish was in the bath. He doubled down. Poor crayfish. And poor you too.

To this day, I can't look a crayfish in the eye. Yeah, well, no, I can't actually, to be honest, remember the last time I looked a crayfish in the eye. Oh, I know, I know. But I did get revenge on Humbo. What did you do? Well, when I was a teenager, we lived on a farm, and he had an obsession for lighting fires and the old drums.

Your brother sounds very dangerous. He is. I knew he was going to do that so I put a can of fly spray in it. Oh, jeez. He lit the fire and there was this massive explosion and it flew out of the side of the drum. It didn't hit him, but

he came running in the house and said, Donna, Donna, call the police. There's been a drive-by shooting and I've been shot. Oh, my God. You sound like you guys should be on Jackass. You guys are pushing the boundaries. He's a shocker. He's always been that way.

Hey, don't you say he's a shocker. You put a can of fly spray in a fire. Yeah. I had to get revenge. You terrified me. Well, I don't know if that was the way to do it, but, Donna, yeah, you've traumatised us with that story on Friday the 13th. We're going to send you out a Chucky doll as well.

Oh, wonderful. You can give that to your brother as well. Try and scare him at night. I certainly will. It makes noise as well. You can put that in his bedroom and maybe give him a fright, and it's all thanks to Neon. He's living in Australia, so I'll send it over to him.

Oh, good on you. Well, there we go. What a loving relationship there between two siblings. Have a good one. You too. Jamie, how's Kait, there we go. What a loving relationship there between two siblings. Have a good one. You too. Jamie, how's Kaitaia? Awesome. It's nice and a little bit cold, but all good.

Okay, name one thing we need to do if we ever come to your town. Go to the beach. Oh, go to the beach. Have you done the sand? You would have done the sand dunes. Get a boogie board and ride down those. Yeah, yeah, heaps, heaps. That's a lot of fun.

Have you done that, Ben? Yeah, I had fun. We've done Yeah, yeah, heaps, heaps. That's a lot of fun. Have you done that bit? Yeah, I had fun. We've done it, driven up north. It's great. It looks like it would be a lot of fun going down, but exhausting and sweaty going back up. Yeah, yeah.

Halfway walking back up, I'd always have a wee seat and pretend I was watching other people do it. Oh, they have a great time. You're huffing and puffing. Just a catch my breath. Just a middle-aged man wheezing his way up a sand dune. Hey, it's Friday the 13th today, Jamie. We're talking scary stuff. And what's happened to you?

Just a lifelong fear of marshmallows, really. You're scared of marshmallows? Yeah. Not the type of call we were expecting, but we're well with it. So not to traumatise you anymore, we're just curious about this. So what is it about? Is it the texture of it? I don't know.

It's like the texture, the looks, the watching everybody eat it. It's just not a good time, eh? Did something happen in your childhood, a marshmallow-based incident, Jamie? No, nothing like that. I can deal with spider snakes in the dark and all of those sort of things. You put a marshmallow in front of you. Jono is the same. We we were talking before about peaches. Yeah.

It's the texture of a peach for him, all furry and that. He doesn't like the idea of that. Yeah, no, it's pretty gross, but just marshmallows, it's next level, eh? Yeah, I've got stiff nipples right now. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. That's also scaring me.

Is that scaring you Jamie? That's the one thing that scares me Yeah Slightly disturbed Yeah And I'm not even going to say Why I've got them They're just out Could cut glass with these things

I know we're all sharing stuff About ourselves Or maybe we are I don't know Just when you talk about Peach skin It makes I've already got goosebumps

You know I get it How are your nipples, Ben? They're actually fine. They're all good. Jamie, I won't be asking you. Hey, Jamie, we're going to send you a Chucky doll. It's from the new series Chucky on Neon.

You can see, you know, hopefully it's slightly less scary for you than marshmallows, alright? Awesome, thank you. Good on you, mate. Look after yourself. You too. Five words for 5K. You're just five words away from $5,000. It's our Game of Word Association.

Match all five words. Without five words, you win five grand. We've already had a five grand winner this week. Yeah, 12-year-olds. And Luke in Auckland, it's great to have you on the show. How are you? I'm well, thank you. How are you?

Oh, we're doing really well. You work in IT? Yes, yes, I do indeed. Now I've got something that will impress you about information technology. This laptop that I've had, this Mac, do you know how old it is, Luke? No, no I don't. No, why would you? Yeah, why would you? This is eight years old. Still going strong.

It doesn't seem that old, but in technology terms, that's like 80 years. Yeah, how much longer do you reckon I can push this thing for, Luke? Oh, I think you're to make it to the end of the year with that. Yeah, eight years old. You never know. Yeah, good one, Ben. The things that laptop's seen, I wouldn't wish upon anyone. Alright. Now, Luke, who do you want to send into the

soundproof booth to try and match five words with you? Jono, please. Alright, heading into the soundproof booth, it actually doubles up as a lap dancing booth over the weekend, so we'll have to give a good hosing out on Monday. Alright, hurry up and get in there, please. All right, eating into the soundproof booth. It actually doubles up as a lap dancing booth over the weekend, so we'll have to give a good hosing out on Monday. All right, hurry up and get in there, mate. Save your crappy jokes till later. Okay, Luke, here is the first word this morning, my friend.

It is Casper. Oh, they're all Friday the 13th related, according to producer Bee Humps, who comes up with the words. So Casper is the first word this morning. Casper. Ghost. Ghost, yep. Haunted is word this morning. Casper. Ghost. Ghost, yep. Haunted is word number two.

Haunted. House. Haunted house. I'm matching 100% with you so far. Unlucky. Hopefully you're not unlucky, but unlucky is the word. Unlucky. Lucky.

We go unlucky. Ghost is word number four. Ghost. Casper. Casper. The opposite of what you did earlier i like that and supernatural is the final word this morning supernatural yeah tricky that is a tough one um haunted haunted hey you played a really good, fast game there, Luke. I think sometimes the first words that pop into your head are usually the right ones, so hopefully that works well today. Jeez, that was quick.

Yeah. You'd be happy. Ben's wanted to pace this game up. Ben's wanted to pace it up. All week he's been like, this dragon, this dragon, we need to pace it up. I love the game. Pace it up, though. All right, Brian, let's pace this up.

They are Friday the 13th words this morning. Okay. He's gone with another theme Yeah okay Casper is word number one What would you say to that Casper? Ghost Well done

Haunted is word number two House Okay I know you want this quick Ben Unlucky Oh Unlucky Unlucky

Mm She's going like Unlucky Person? Unlucky Unlucky Person? Unlucky So that was tough Oh Luke Now let's see if you would have gone

This one, ghost was word four Ghost Face He went Casper Because originally he went Casper ghost Then he went the opposite Luke, let's be honest, you played a far better game than I have Supernatural event Haunted, you played a far better game than I have. You did, and Supernatural.

Supernatural event. Haunted, that was a tough one as well. Well, Luke, I'm so sorry, mate. We couldn't win you $5,000 today. I'll tell you what, we'll send you out some Hell Pizza, though, shall we? Yeah. That'd be awesome, thank you.

Yeah, good. They're now delivering beer and wine to Hell Pizza. So you go and have a great weekend. Thanks for listening, mate. Thank you, likewise. No worries. Not the last chance to win on the show. Cash in Car is just 15 minutes away.

You can win that amazing Škoda, which is worth just under $46,000. That was three minutes, 40 seconds, Ben. Loved it. Loved it. Loved everything about it. Except the fact we didn't have a winner. It would be nice to give Luke $5,000. That's Cash in Car.

Guess how much cash we've stashed in the Škoda's boot and drive it home, along with all that money. Yeah, if you want to win this amazing Škoda and all the cash that's stashed in the back, then you need to call us 0800 THE HATS, and if you guess the exact amount, you can take home everything.

We're going to head to Te Puke. Kylie, you're on New Zealand's Breakfast Morena. Oh, hello. Good morning. Great to have you on, K-Dog. Now, is this too much cash and too much car for you to handle? Serious question.

For me, I'd be giving the car straight away to my mum. She was always my taxi. Mum drives a shitty little Mazda and has had a terrible year. And, yeah, she's currently not working. And this would just, oh, I'm shaking. It would do quite a bit. What's happened to your mum this year? She lost her job, did she?

No, she actually lost her partner. So he battled cancer. And yeah, so Easter we did his ashes. So within that year, I think it really throws you when you lose your soulmate and stuff. So yeah, we've just tried to keep her going, I think it really throws you when you lose your soulmate and stuff. So, yeah, we've just tried to keep her going, I guess. Signing lots of love to your family through difficult times. What a lovely daughter you are, giving your mother the car.

I have to rock up with a new car. Imagine that. Listen to the look on her face. It's a game changer. It is. Now, we understand you've been following all the clues online, you've been trying to work this out. You think you might have cracked it? Well, I

kind of, I failed maths at school, so it's probably not the first thing I should say, but yeah, I did my, yeah, I've done a lot of reading up on the Facebook page and everybody's comments on who can and can't do maths.

And then Brad and Laura threw me off with the adamant that there's no sense in there. So I've really been listening and really trying to take on board everything everybody's trying to throw out on the radio. All right, we've zeroed it in. We've said it's between 15 and 20. We said it's the value of the car comes into play, how many times you can fill up the tank comes into play as well. And now, Kylie, we are going to hand you over to New Zealand's premier cash keeper, Alex Lansdowne. Come on in from the cash bunker. Morning, Kylie.

Good morning. How are you? Good. First thing I would say, I produce Brad and Laura, and please do not take a word of their advice because they have no idea what's going on. Oh, damn. Okay. All right. So it's going to go until tomorrow then. I mean, Monday. So to make you daughter of the century, how much cash is in the back of that car, Kylie? I'm hand on heart hoping, more than anything, it is $16,010 exactly.

$16,010 exactly. 16010.00. Thank you for reading it out for me. I was struggling to type it down too, yeah. All right, Kylie from Te Puke with a guess of $16,010. Come on. That is incorrect.

I'm so sorry. So sorry, Kylie. I would have loved to have given this to you this morning, but it doesn't mean you can't win it. You've still got plenty more chances, all right? And please, please listen out for This Afternoon with Brad and Laura

because I will be giving a good clue away. Oh, okay. I will be. Thank you. Good on you. And so it's certainly not the last time you can get through, Kylie. You go and enjoy that giant kiwi fruit that you have in Teapookie and have a wonderful weekend.

Thank you. You go too. Thanks for playing. Lots of love to the family, right? Yeah, good on you, Kylie. Love your work. iHeart Radio, download the app. There's a microphone on there. Push that. Thanks for playing. Lots of love to the family, right? Yeah, good on you, Kylie. Love your work. iHeart Radio, download the app.

There's a microphone on there. Push that. Record your guests. Leave your name and number and Alex could be calling you at 11 o'clock this morning. Morning. Contains dodgy parenting advice.

Shono and Ben on the hits. It is a Friday. It's been a busy week this week. As I mentioned earlier, my wife, who's a teacher, is on school camp

with one of my daughters, Sienna, as well. I didn't realise they were going on camp. Yeah, so they went away from Tuesday. Who's looking after your Indy? Well, yeah, so I'm obviously, me and Indy have been having, Indy and I have been having some great one-on-one time, but then my mother-in-law, Joyce, is coming over because obviously we go to work. I can't leave.

And the 10-year-old in the house at 5 in the morning and just go, all right, I'm out. Oh, so you're living with Joyce at the moment? Yeah. Oh, you're living with your mother-in-law. It's funny. Every time you bring that up to normally one of my dickhead mates like you, they're like, oh, you're living with the mother-in-law.

Yeah. That's great. Joyce is a lovely lady. She's great. We get on great. Best and worst thing about living with Joyce. Go. I want both.

No, but I lived with Joyce for three months. You did? Yeah. Because Amanda went overseas. She went overseas many years ago when we were about to go overseas and I was just in the middle

of a TV show. So she went overseas for three months and I caught up with her after that and Joyce and I lived together. You loved living with Joyce because all the washing was done,

the cooking was done. It was like living with a flatmate who did everything for you. She kept going, I hope you don't mind, but I've done the washing. I was like, the cooking was done. It was like living with a flatmate who did everything for you. She kept going, I hope you don't mind, but I've done the washing. I was like, I don't mind at all. She's got a wonderful kind heart, George. She's probably the only person in the world still passionately defending Lance Armstrong. She was a big fan of Lance Armstrong.

Huge fan of Lance. We don't bring it up anymore. It's like we don't talk about Bruno or Lance Armstrong. We just faded out of that. I think even Lance Armstrong's like, ah, you got me. I think he is. It's there. We don't bring it up.

But it's interesting. I had a little moment of realization. And I imagine a lot of parents do as well. Because you do, you get. It's been really busy this week. And it does get busy. And it's really hard to sometimes juggle, you know, like juggle between the things you've got to do for work and life and admin

and also with your kids. And I love hanging out with my kids. It's been awesome to spend time with Indy. Be controversial to your kids. And I love hanging out with my kids. It's been awesome to spend time with Indy. Be controversial to see if you said I hate hanging out with my children. No, but it is hard because you do get so busy. And this week I've been running around doing stuff. And then I always put my notes in my phone, you know, things I need to do.

And the other day, a couple of days ago, I was like, oh, Indy, I was in the car. I was like, can you put a note in my phone? I've just remembered I need to do. He loves a to-do list. I do. I do love a to-do list. And you tick them off?

Yeah. He sends me weekly to-do lists, and I've never done anything on the to-do list. No, I've stopped. I've faded out. I'll send him to you. But it was interesting. It was just a little moment I had when I went and checked that to-do list, and she'd put the note in my phone of things I needed to do.

But under it, she went, play with Indy. And she put a little note in as well. And I thought that was... And we did. And yesterday, we went out And I thought that was – and we did. And yesterday we went out and we got ice cream and we just, you know, we did some Lego and we did some other stuff that she wanted to do. But it's a good reminder. Even though you love doing those things, you know,

you've got to make time for those things as well. And it's hard, though, when you're doing all the juggle. It is. I'd love to not be doing work and just hanging out with my kids 24-7. Okay, I'll pass it on to Bogsy. If that's what you want to do, we can make that happen. We'll put a job ad up. Okay, but I also love the job as well.

Bogsy, we'd save a salary here, mate. Okay, maybe. Maybe I'd like a balance. Have you just announced your retirement? Okay, maybe I have. I might not be around after 8 o'clock, but yay. But I'll be playing with my kids. Jono and Ben.

Just like family. The family members you're ashamed of. Jono and Ben. On the The family members You're ashamed of Jono and Ben On the hits Now we've got a dog A couple of weeks ago A little cavoodle Milo

He's a little puppy And truly adorable And it's actually On a serious note Ben Boyce You know No shenanigans here It's really good

For the kids The dog Teaches them a lot Of empathy You know How to look after And they've stepped up To the mark They're picking up stuff.

They're doing stuff. Scrowed didn't think they would. Oh, that's good. I don't know when that fades out. You've been in the dog game for a while. It does fade out. It fades out. Yeah, I'm imagining it fades out. It definitely fades out, but not entirely. I mean, they still, you know, feed their animals at home and stuff and care and love for it. But maybe the picking up department outside is, that's faded out. The love

for that is gone. That's on me. Have you still got the love? I don't have the love for picking up at it, but I do. You do it. How many times a day? Oh, they're productive. As you're doing it. I just picked up all this yesterday.

It's just falling out of you. Anyway, you've been kind of like my dog mentor. The adorable shambles bow that you have, your big samoyed. I look at you and I'm like, that's the dog guy I want to be, running around after a dog. But I'm sure you went through this phase, but this tiny dog literally thinks everything is a toy

and everything's there. Shoelaces, towels, underpants, light bulbs. Basically, everything's a chewable toy. I was chewing on an extension cord. I plugged an extension cord yesterday. Nothing is off limits. It was always my shoes with the dog too, which really, I was like, why does it always have to be my shoes?

But we decided to chew. Didn't your dog eat your car knob? The gear stick. The gear stick and all the stuff for the air conditioning. It's all chewed. It's got chew marks all through it. We left it momentarily in the car. I popped inside the dairy to get something, came back out, all the windows were open.

And he'd chew. Mate, you've been gnawing away on this thing. No, you know you can just sit there. You don't have to have your mouth wrapped around something the entire time. Anyway, the other day I saw him eating, he was on the lawn. He's eating rocks. He's eating leaves. Nothing's off limits.

And he had this bird feather in his mouth. And you know it still had the sticky bit on it? You know, like that holds the actual feathers. And he had it hanging out of his mouth. And I was trying to pull it out, and he was getting rather protective of this bird feather. I'm like, all right, mate, you do what you need to do and he swallowed it okay and i was like well that's going to be an issue in a couple of days and it was and it's become an issue i had to take him to the vet yesterday and do you know what i'm required to do for the next seven days let's just say it involves

ointment and the application of ointment to a certain part of the body three times a day that's what i'm going to be doing okay you think of what you're doing this weekend that's what i'm doing with my bare hands with my bare hands that's yeah that's a low point i'll do yours if you need me to thank you i had my dog the same sort of thing he ate one of the kids socks when they were little and we didn't realize he'd eaten the sock until it sort of, I was like, why has he got an extra tail? And what's going on there? And he'd obviously tried to pass it, but it hadn't quite got through. So who stepped up?

So I had to allow, I put some gloves on and I was like. Like tug of war? Right, we're going to get this thing out of you. Fortunately, it came out in one place. I hope he only ate one of the socks. I don't know. If he ate the second one, that's well done. He's like a clothes dryer. One mysteriously goes

missing inside. That's what I've got to look forward to. I've got to look forward to that. It's Friday the 13th. And thanks to Neon to go to the new series Chucky. The scary doll. We've got some dolls to give away this morning. But thinking more about Friday the 13th

because it's meant to be unlucky for some. That's what they always say. You were born on Friday the 13th, weren't you, Jono? Look at me. Luck just drenched all over me. Except for the hair department. But apart from that, you're right. Well, maybe it depends how you look at that, Ben Boyce.

Maybe I'm lucky I don't have to spend valuable minutes in the shower shampooing. True. Some would consider that a blessing. Are you superstitious? Because I mentioned a lot of superstitious things, you know, people are quite wary, and Friday the 13th is one of those superstitious things. Yeah.

I had a while where I was, I don't know what it was, but it was a situation where in my head I never thought the door was locked. And so we used to live in an apartment, and before I would be able to shut the door, leave, or lock the door for night to go to bed, I'd have to open it, shut it, open it, shut it.

To make sure it's this, yeah. Three times. Just three times. So to the point of my door opening and closing got wildly out of control. Right, yeah. Where many times, on probably half a dozen occasions,

I woke up in the morning and the door was wide open. Oh. I'd wake up in the middle of the night. Well, that would make you want to worry about it more. Correct. Yeah. Yeah, so it was an open door policy there for a while.

Yeah. I don't know, does it have anything to do with what we're talking about? Well, no. Not really. No, I don't know if it's superstitious, but it's an interesting little... You're like, thanks for the cool story.

Well, yeah. It wasn't a cool story. It was interesting. Yeah. I'd do similar with the cool story. Oh, yeah. It wasn't a cool story. It was. It was interesting. I do similar with the doors. You've got to make sure it's locked. I was thinking before, I was thinking, I'm not superstitious. But then I think I am because I don't want to do any of the things that you're like,

I don't want to walk under a ladder. I don't want to. I was going to bring an umbrella in today. And I was like, well, that's, but then I was like, well, what if, and it was a warrior's umbrella. I was like, what if I curse the warriors? And what if I bring bad luck upon the show just by doing it? So I'm like, maybe I am superstitious.

I don't think your umbrella is going to do anything to the Warriors. Because even like this thing I'll show you, this is my bag. So my parents, when they went overseas, they did their big OE for a few years. They gave me this cork and it's got coins on it. It's in my bag and I carry it. And they gave it to me and I took it overseas and I carry it around everywhere. And, well, I used to no longer yeah but it's like and i got as i kind of and now i'm given no i have to carry it around because they're like this is good luck carry it around

when you travels and you travels and so i took it around in my travels and i carry it around as well and then it's like it's just a cork a wine bottle cork with some coins in it and now i feel like well i can't throw it out because it's a good luck thing. So maybe I am superstitious. Maybe I am. But I don't think I am. But you've just gone rummaging through your bag and you can't find your lucky cork.

Yeah, well, maybe I lost it because I took it out this morning. I'll find it in a second. Yeah, okay. He's fossicking through his bag. It's not exciting. It's not exciting. It's just a cork with a thing on it. Okay, 0800 with a hit.

So while we go on this cork find search... Oh, there it is. Oh, there we go. So it's not exciting. It's just a cork with some coins in it. My parents took round all around Europe and stuff. But now I feel like... It feels like some drunk person would do that after dinner.

But now I'm like, I can't throw it out because obviously this is luck. And if I throw it out, I'm going to get bad luck. Even though it's not really a... It's going to be handed through the boys' generations. Why? I don't know. 0800 the hits. Let's do this.

We're going to find the luckiest and the unluckiest listeners this morning. You can text 24487. We've got those Chucky dolls, those terrifying dolls to give away. Tested safe for listing from home. Jono and Ben on The Hits. Because it's Friday the 13th, we're talking about lucky and unlucky callers on 0800 The Hits. Why is a Friday the 13th deemed an unlucky day? Why do we have to be down buzzed on a Friday?

Friday's the greatest day ever. That's true. It should be like Monday. Miserable Monday. Whenever it falls on the 13th. You're right. Anyway, we're going to go to the phones for the luckiest and unluckiest listeners this morning. Kay, are you lucky or unlucky?

Well, I've always had bad luck. Like, I even fell over a pair of shoes this morning. How did you fall over a pair of shoes? Were you wearing the shoes? No, they were just in my way. Yeah, did you face plant, did you? Almost. Seems like quite a response to just trip over a pair of shoes.

I get it, I get it. Okay, that's it. Friday the 13th, okay. Yeah, but I've never won anything other than a Nutri-Grain T-shirt I put on my Facebook page. But I've won lots of pizzas from Hell's Pizza, so I've tuned into the hits. So I'm very grateful to you guys. So we want to send a huge shout-out to Nutri-Grain and Hell's Pizza. Have you got that Nutri-Grain t-shirt on now, Kay?

Oh, I was too embarrassed to wear it, so I gave it to the op shop. Don't be embarrassed for now, mate. That lady loves Nutri-Grain. It'll turn you into an aggressive child triathlete. That's right. Yeah. Who'd you win the Nutri-Grain t-shirt off? Oh, that was years ago.

I can't even remember. I entered some competition. Well, I tell you what, Kay. You can put that t-shirt, that pizza aside, because now you've won a Chucky doll. A scary Chucky doll. Oh, I tell you what, Kay, you can put that T-shirt, that pizza aside, because now you've won a Chucky doll. A scary Chucky doll. Oh, I love that movie. I don't know if it's going to give you good luck or not,

but it's a scary wee doll you can have. All right, thanks to Neon, they're serious Chuckies on, okay? Thank you for that. Well, it's my boy's birthday on the 24th, and Luke would love that. Oh, Luke, shout out to Luke, and shout out to you, Kay. You've turned your luck over this morning. Thank you, guys. You rock. Oh out to you, Kay. You've turned your luck over this morning. Thank you, guys. You rock.

Thank you, Kay. Yes, we do. Do we? I don't know. What do you say to that? When someone says you rock, do you agree with them? I don't know if that's the answer for us. Maybe if you're like the Chili Peppers or something.

Yeah, you guys rock. Yeah, I didn't know how to respond to that. I told you, didn't I? I arrogantly said, yes, we do. Steph. Steph. Good morning. Do we rock?

You do. Yeah. Just wanted confirmation that we were rocking. All right. Oh, yeah. Are you lucky or unlucky, Steph? This morning, I am extremely unlucky. What happened?

Well, so I lost my keys this morning for the second time this week. In the child's toy box, of course. Running late already, get to daycare. Oh crap, no daycare bag. And because of the running late, I was too late to get a decent park. So I am now walking, I don't know, a thousand bloody miles to get to work. And now you've even taken time out to call the radio as well to add that into the stressful morning, Steph. I know, but in my defense, we listen to you guys every morning.

So at least they already know I'm late. Oh, well, Steph, I tell you what, we are going to give you, for your shocking morning, your unlucky morning, a Chucky doll. Oh, I think we've given... No, she's unlucky with those. Sorry, I take it back. We've given all those away, but we've got... You almost had one of those, but I think we've only got three.

Yeah, your bad luck continues, Steph. But we have got some hell pizza to send out for dinner, all right? Oh, brilliant. Thank you. Sorry. We were the comms. You gave me no comms on that. Hey, we don't have a Hell's Pizza. Well, then you are unlucky.

You are unlucky. All right, we'll sort something out for you. Hold the line, all right? I think we've got a new skoda in the garage. We'll see if we can give that to you. I think that'll do. Jono and Ben. The FIFA Women's World Cup,

the Football World Cup, is coming to Australia and New Zealand next year. It's really exciting to have that on home soil. The best teams in the world are going to be competing here. And the draw today

happens at 11 o'clock. So Ben, 32 teams. Have we got enough motel rooms for 32 football teams? That's my major concern, Ben. We probably do now

that they're not all COVID motels This is phenomenal The 9th edition of this To be held in New Zealand A FIFA World Cup I'm saying it's slow, it's important Get your tickets now I don't know if the tickets are out just yet

The draw is going to be made today And then we'll let you know when the tickets are going to be You can buy tickets from me. I'm running a legal ticketing website, legitimatefifatickets.com.au. Let's do some scrolling. Scrolling through your feed. Okay, Ben Boyce, this is the hardest news you'll hear today. Well, I don't know if it is, but actually, the first story is a little bit more serious.

Obviously, Omicron cases in Auckland have been climbing a bit recently. They've jumped by 50% over the last few weeks. And they reckon that maybe it's going to shift to high numbers around the country as New Zealand gets a wee bit of a second wave. Hey, that's fun news to give us on a Friday, mate. Thank you. But North Korea, what I found interesting,

they've just reported their first ever COVID-19 case. They've not had COVID. Well, well. A lot of the world is saying, well, just like I have. It's Kim J. Donald Trump. He's like, let's just not report the facts. None have been reported until, yeah, just yesterday they reported their first case and they said they've gone into a bit of a lockdown over there.

But yeah, some people are questioning, but hey, not for me to question. I think if you got COVID over there, you stood in front of a firing squad. Just keep the numbers down. That's how they keep the numbers down in North Korea. Wouldn't it be wonderful to be a dictator? You could just do anything you want. He loved basketball,

90s basketball, particularly the Jordan-Chicago Bulls. Loved them so much that he flew his hero Dennis Rodman over to play basketball with him. That's right. Now we're hanging out together and stuff.

That's what you can do when you're a dictator. You love basketball. You could run an entire country and go, hey LeBron James, fly over here and play one-on-one with me

and he'd probably come. He'd probably come because if you don't come I'm going to launch some nuclear weapons. You've almost turned me but I don't like the evil stuff that sometimes the dictator

is said to do. But actually, speaking of LeBron James, now he's got an agent called Rich Paul, who is part of... Who's living up to his name. He's loaded. Yeah, and he's with Adele. Heard of Adele?

Of course, yeah. Oh, Adele, yeah. She's an up-and-coming artist. So they've just become official in the fact that they've moved in together into a mansion in Hollywood. Now, their neighbours include Denzel Washington, Magic Johnson, Justin Bieber

and their home is $58 million American. What a wonderful neighbourhood to be part of. Would you have your normal neighbourhood moans like, oh Bieber's left us. Bieber hasn't put his bins out again. He probably isn't putting his bins out, is he? He'd be the binfluencer, Bieber.

You brought that term up. The first person to bring their bins out on bin night, Bell, is the binfluencer. Yeah, I read that online. It's a good term because there's always someone that goes first. We go to bed at basically dinner time. Some people go rogue and bring out double bins. It's not a double bin week. But then you feel obliged to bring out your double bins.

Just in case they've got it correct. But what was really interesting about Adele's new house is that it was formerly owned by Sylvester Stallone, an action movie star, and he's got a big bronze statue of himself and his Rocky character by the pool, and everyone thought, oh, he'll take it with him, but it must be like the chattels or whatever they have in the house.

Yeah, it also comes with this wonderful bronze statue of Sylvester Stallone. Because he's left it there. He's left it there. There's helicopter footage, quite pesky helicopter footage of Adele's house, and he's still got the statue by the pool. Well, yeah, I guess it's a talking point at the barbie, isn't it?

Hey, thanks so much for listening. We're getting a countdown. Then we've got seven seconds left of the show, Ben, so wrap it up. Yeah, have yourself a wonderful weekend. We can't wait to join you again on Monday, 6 o'clock. The Hits. For more podcasts from The Hits Network, check out iHeartRadio.co.nz.