Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - FULL: Will Ben Meet His Hero Kevin Hart?

Episode Date: March 20, 2023

Jono has a plan for Ben to meet Kevin Hart! When have you been walked in on..? Lewis Capaldi Memory game P!NK win tickets to her in London. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kia ora, John Owen Bend Podcast Thank you so much to Challenge Petrol Service Stations We really do appreciate your support Fueling the John Owen Bend Hey, why don't we say that? Fueling the John Owen Bend Podcast Challenge Jeez, petrol smells good, doesn't it?

When you're on the forecourt It smells just, you're like I can see how people would get hooked on solvents You know, when you're on a petrol forecourt, you're like, I can see the... Oh, it's more doses, I imagine. Yeah. You don't want to be around at all. You're not going to wear it, like, splash it on like, yeah,

youp, or yeah, Calvin Klein, or whatever you're putting on in the morning, you know? I used to love a bottle of youp. Youp. Growing up. What was your favourite fragrance as a teenager? Well, I think I would have been the stock standard Lynx for a while. You know, like that was the spray on.

My son, he's in his Lynx period in life at the moment. And there's nothing like that. It's like when you walk into a changing room with all the deep heat and liniment. Yeah. There's nothing like that unmistakable odor of hormones and Lynx. Lynx Africa hasn't changed.

Yeah. Still smells like Africa. It still smells like Africa. Yeah. No, yeah, Joop was a popular, Fahrenheit? Do you remember Fahrenheit?

Yeah, Fahrenheit, yeah. It came in like a very rose red sort of bottle. CK1, there was Izzy Miyake, all the, you know, like, yeah. Izzy Miyake, okay.

CK1 was, what's that one? David Beckham. Oh, he had some David Beckham ones, did you? Does Beckham have his own fragrance? Oh, that's the thing now. Everyone's got their fragrance, haven't they? David Beckham. Oh, he had some David Beckham ones, didn't he? Does Beckham have his own fragrance? Oh, that's the thing now. Everyone's got their fragrance, haven't they?

You know, Ariana Grande, she's got hers. You know, Ryan, everyone's got their own. Beyonce, Rihanna. Yeah, or if they haven't got a fragrance, they're a face of a fragrance. If you had a fragrance, what would it smell like? Desperation. Both of us. Jono and Ben.

Maybe we should release our own. Yes. Desperation by Jono and Ben Desperate Maybe we should release That's quite good Yes Desperation Desperation sounds quite cool Smell desperate Desperate yeah Yes

That's good Let's do that with bloody someone Yeah That's fun Links Yeah We can put links desperation We actually pitched an idea to links

That we would do the smell of Rotorua In a can We thought you know You go to Rotorua And you smell, you know, the solvent sort of thing. We thought Stinks would be like a sub-brand of Lynx. STY and X. I guess they are probably not in the novelty smell market. Do we want to sell cans of deodorant or cans of farts? We get it.

We get it. You know, Lynx, they haven't been around that long. I mean, they haven't been around so long that, what am I trying to say? Lynx, they haven't lasted that long without turning a profit is what I wanted to say there. You know, they know what they're doing when it comes to fragrances. It's pretty quite easy to say that you don't want to get something

that smells bad for deodorant as well, because that's the sole purpose of it, to make it smell good. Yeah, you do want to smell good, right? Yeah. Oh, I remember that one. Released in 1995, Jean-Paul Gaultier. Oh, I do know the name. It was a blue one of it to make you smell good. Yeah, you do want to smell good, right? Yeah. Oh, I remember that one. Released in 1995. Jean-Paul Gaultier. Oh, I do know the name.

And it was a blue one and it was a body. Yeah. That smelled nice. Yeah. It's amazing how fragrances, they date. You know how you get, like if you sprayed on an old Lynx, your favourite Lynx odour from Easter, you'd be like, oh no. You kind of leave a fragrance in the past.

Yeah, you kind of leave it in the past. Like an ex-partner. Yeah. Well, there probably is that as well. You're right. You'd smell a smell of someone that you used to date or whatever, and you'd be like, oh, that reminds me of that. What do you think?

I'm going to look up a list here of the nicest odours in the world. Oh, so not necessarily cologne. We did this last year with the general smell action. We did too. We did. And I think freshly smelt baby

was up there. Freshly baked bread was up there. A lot of fresh stuff. Bee hums. Do you know what one? Freshly washed baby was in the smell action.

Bacon cooking was another big one. Mown grass that had just been mown. Yeah, a lot of great smells around. But you're talking about the best smells. Yeah. This is according to science.

Okay. Science has never let us down. Your partner's pheromones? Would that be up there? What's that one? Your partner's pheromones? Yeah, probably. You know how families kind of have a smell?

Yeah. Like, you know, if the voices came over, you'd be like, the voices have been here. You can't describe what it is. Desperation. The house smells a bit more desperate than usual. Let's have a look here. What is the most popular? It's one of those ones where you have to click through.

Is it like vanilla and things like that? Is that going to go on? It is vanilla. Yeah. Chocolate, baking bread burning wood oh burning wood okay yeah

ruining the environment great smell pine trees another big one oh yeah that's nice pine trees is good I went for a walk last night I smelt that

I was like oh that takes me to Christmas yeah yeah it's funny how a smell can take you to a place you can smell that thing like you were saying before

John over at the rugby changing room you can smell that thing. Like you were saying before, Jono, with the rugby changing rooms, you can smell that thing. You're like, oh, it takes you back. I remember that. Don't know where it takes me back to. Sort of sifting around changing rooms. All the stuff I still like. Fun times.

But yeah, no, that's it. We just get on to that odour. That's funny. Desperation. Hey, we had a good brainstorming session in the podcast. And now enjoy the scenes. Yelling at cast members. Yes. It was a script. No. His identity is a secret.

But his stories have been proven right time and time again. This is NT. He's our lifeline to Hollywood, breathing life into the dead carcass of our show. Welcome, NT. How are you? Doing some CPR for you guys. I'm good. Now, NT, geez, crazy week in the States.

Is Donald Trump going to be arrested? Okay, so he says that he is going to be arrested on Tuesday, U.S. time. You know, it's possible. What exactly is it for? Something to do with Stormy Daniels, am I right? Yeah, supposedly. So the $100, um hush money and i don't know exactly but i don't know if it came from campaign finance or whatever but it came

from someplace where it wasn't reported and so that's why they're going after him but it's just messy and messy doesn't necessarily mean illegal you know and so i think that juries don't necessarily like to to get into messy stuff. So is it possible that Trump could get indicted and arraigned? Yeah. Yeah, he could get arrested for sure. But honestly, by the time anything would ever go to trial or anything, we probably already have the election in the U.S. next year. You must have met him in your days when he was in the world of entertainment. Nope, never have. Oh, really? He's New York. He's New York.

You know, so New York is a whole different thing. L.A. celebrities, it's, you know, if you go out enough, that's the other thing. You really have to still continually kind of go out if you're going to try and run into everybody. But the New York people, they only come for, let's say, to do some press or something like that. I know people who, you know, know him or whatever,

been on the show and things like that. But, yeah, I never met him. Taylor Swift, she's kicked off her tour. 80,000 people in Arizona over the weekend. She's predicted to rake in 591 US million. She's doing like 44 songs. It goes for like two days, about three hours,

the concert. This is huge. It does. And I think that you're going to actually see when the grosses are all said and done, I think you're going to see over 600 million us for the, the ticket sales. And that doesn't include merch.

That doesn't include licensing and all this other kind of stuff that she's going to have on there. And even ticket master, which is a horrible processing firm, I mean, they make $13, $14 million from this tour just for processing tickets. Would you call her the most successful artist of our generation? Oh, I think so, for sure. Because just go back and look. I mean, anybody who does a stadium tour, they will probably do one stadium in one city.

You know, she's doing three a weekend in most of these cities in stadiums. Some great rumors about Taylor Swift. I'd love you to confirm them or deny them. Her legs. Okay. Her legs insured for $40 million. Her legs? Her legs.

Expensive legs. What do you think? Is this true or false what i mean that that one came out like about 10 years ago and it was something look is she insured probably up to her eyeballs if you want to say that it's because of her legs and the fact that she can't work or something think about 40 million dollars is and that was 10 years ago so how much would they need to be insured for now because Because as you said, this tour is going to gross, you know, between 590 and 620 million dollars. And what percentage of that does she get? I would venture to say it's more than 40 she's singing the 10-minute version of All Too Well, I mean, she's basically running around. You know, she could hurt her legs or something. Those legs are clocking up some Ks on this tour.

Another rumor, doesn't have a belly button. Over to you. Everybody thought that for the longest time because she refused to ever pose. She thought that would be setting a bad precedent. So she allowed herself to be photographed showing a belly button, and ever since then, she's been okay with the belly button. Could have been Photoshopped. Could have been Photoshopped. Photoshop with that belly button.

That's why they paid the big bucks. NT, we paid no bucks. We don't pay you anything, but we thank you so much for your time every week. We really appreciate it, and we'll catch up with you very shortly. All right, you guys have a great week. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, Ben Affleck, you remember a few weeks ago he was at the Grammy Awards and there was all those memes coming out because he looked a bit like he didn't want to be there.

I've never seen Ben Affleck happy in the last 15 years. Yeah, and he's talked now about his grouchy expression. That's how he put it, grouchy. He said he insisted he was having a good time, but he said his wife's work event. He was like, yeah, I was at my wife's work event. And so the backstory was, according to Ben Affleck, was Trevor Noah, he was the host of the show.

He saw him approach the table and he was like, uh-oh. You know, one of those things like, uh-oh. And he didn't realize they were filming at the time. And then he said to his wife, Jennifer Lopez, he was like, uh-oh. You know, one of those things, uh-oh. And he didn't realise they were filming at the time. And then he said to his wife, Jennifer Lopez, he's like, hey, as soon as they start rolling, I'm going to kind of leave and go towards, you know, to the bar or out of the way. It's your thing. I don't want to be a shot.

It's your work event. Yeah. And she's like, don't you leave me. Don't you leave me here right now. And so they were having that discussion, but he didn't realise that that discussion was going on television. Not the words as such, but just the mannerisms. Just the, yeah, where he's like,

mate, why are you dragging me along to these work events? No one ever likes going to their partner's work event, do they? And he was like, it's a husband-wife discussion at a work event that was my wife's. He's like, I don't know any of the people here. They're all her colleagues. Yeah. But he did say he had a great time there.

He just said at that moment, didn't look like he was having a great time and that was the backstory behind it. It's always good to get a backstory behind it. That's right. No one will ever hear the backstory though. Do you go along to Amanda's teacher's functions? Oh, now and again I do.

But then sometimes it's like, yeah, for more fun. You know, like some of my radio stuff, I'm like, why drag her along to my radio stuff? Yeah, when they're like oh I don't know anyone to hear yeah

yeah I hear you and it's the Christmas party time is the one oh it's the families at the Christmas party the family don't want to be at the Christmas party

do they it's lovely it's a lovely gesture it is bring the family along family would rather be doing anything else right now than hanging out with me

and my work mates the hits the Jono and Ben podcast on your Tuesday morning Black Caps won yesterday Yeah. Family would rather be doing anything else right now than hanging out with me and my workmates. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. On your Tuesday morning, Black Caps won yesterday. That's all I'm going to say on the cricket. That's all I'm going to say. Well done to the Black Caps. Three in a row.

Three tests in a row. Yeah. You'd be happy about that? Oh, happy. But not going to talk about it because right now, more important things. Play memory to see Lewis Capaldi live in New Zealand we just spoke to the great man himself

working the pub, working the horseshoe pub in Scotland and he is coming to Auckland if he can get time off from his pub job might need some annual leave July he's going to be in Wellington in Auckland we've got a double pass to Lewis Capaldi's Auckland show, all the details at

livenation.co.nz so what we do is we play you some audio, a list of 12 things, and then you've got to remember, because he's got the song Forget Me, you've got to remember six of the 12 items. Yeah, it's a fun game. If you've got a semi-functioning memory,

you should do kind of well at this. Do you know I used to play, do you remember the card game memory? And you'd turn all the cards upside down and you had to match the pairs. I would play with my dear, sweet, sweet 90-year-old Nana. But we would play on a glass table. And as I was playing her, I would slide under the glass table

and just see where the cards were. Now, I'm pretty sure she saw what I was doing. And she's like, mate, I'm 90. How much more of an advantage do you need? My memory's already shaky. Candice, you're I'm 90. How much more of an advantage do you need? I'm already, my meat brick's already shaky. Candice, you're on from Hamilton. How are you? Good morning.

I'm good, thank you. How are you? We're lovely. It's great to have you on New Zealand's Breakfast. Do you work at the council? Yeah, I do. Do you want me to moan about some stuff? You'll deal with that when you get to work.

Yeah, right now. Right now we want to give you some Lewis Capaldi tickets, a double pass to Auckland's show for Lewis Capaldi. So we're going to play you a list of famous New Zealanders, and you've got to listen and remember six out of the 12, okay? Okay. The famous New Zealanders. Sir Edmund Hillary.

Lord. Sir Richard Hadley Janet Frame Neil Finn Jane Campion Sir Peter Jackson Kiri Takanawa Sam Neill

Rachel Hunter Taika Waititi Bert Munro Okay. Good old Janet Frame getting her shit out there as well. Yeah, author. Okay, so you need to name six, or probably five now. Okay. All right, away you go.

Edmund Hillary, Lord, Richard Hadley, Janet Frame, Neil Finn, Jane Campion, Kiri Takanawa, Sam Neill, Rachel Hunter, Taika Waititi, and Burt Munro. Jeez, you actually rattled through pretty much all of them. That was really impressive. I think you might have missed one in the mix there right now. And in order, so well done. You're going to see Lewis Capote. Oh, yes.

Thank you so much. It's a double pass. Who are you going to take along there, Kando? Oh, I'll take my husband with me. Oh, good on you. Well, you're going to have a fun night out. Thank you so much for listening, and good luck dealing with everyone moaning about the council today.

Thank you. All righty, there we go. That's how it's done. Back tomorrow. Yeah, it's a lot of fun, that game. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Last night, Ben, dramatic scenes in the prior household, and we've got this cat next door.

And it's a cat that would be a character on a Disney Pixar film. It kind of just taunts, particularly my little dog, Milo. The cat will kind of prance on the lawn, and the cat knows what it's doing. Cats are a smarter specimen than dogs. We love dogs, but they're a bit dumb, lovable and goofy, aren't they? For the most part, dogs. Cats, they're a whole other level, psychologically speaking. So this cat will come and sort of prance on the lawn.

He knows what's going to happen. The dog's going to go like wander around, take him about 10 minutes until he realises there's a cat on the lawn and then chase it, boom. He gets his back up, a few scowls, a few swipes. And then he sits on the lawn and then chase it boom he gets his back up few scowls few you know swipes and then he sits on the fence just taunting just absolutely taunting but the cat last night has really made itself at home i walk into the kitchen we've got a con carne brewing in the fry pan chili con carne wonderful mexican dish. Bit too spicy, if anything.

But they're sitting there, and I went down to bring the bins in. It's bin day. Okay, double bins. Rolling those back up. Get back into the kitchen. The cat is on the bench sucking away on my con carne. Oh, really? Getting in? I walk in and go, hey, he looks at me

as if, don't interrupt my dinner. Which is what I want to open up this morning. What have you managed to walk in on? You can text 4487 0800. The hits is the telephone number. This cat is honestly, and it's not like you can go to the owners of the cat and go, mate, control your cat. Cats are doing their own thing. They're running their own schedule.

They run the neighborhood, eh? The cats. Yeah, they definitely do. So you want to know this morning, what have you walked in on? I was trying to think about this just before, and I couldn't think of anything that I'd walked in on at home, apart from the fact that I walked in on that time you covered my house in Post-it notes.

You remember that? And I walked in another time you were hiding in my bathroom and these beanbag balls, and you popped out like the Grinch. And those balls, they were everywhere throughout your house for years, weren't they? And then there's another time you put a digger through my house and then I walked in. And another time you dumped an ice, a truck full of ice on my car in the driveway. And then another time you were dressed up like a horror movie character with a chainsaw and the chainsaw fell apart.

So I couldn't think of anything, any occasion or anyone that I would have walked in on in my house. Yeah, I mean, there's no point in reflecting on the past, mate. It's all about the future. Oh, right. Is that what it is? Stuff went on in the past? Yeah, I mean, there's no point in reflecting on the past, mate. It's all about the future. Oh, right. Is that what it is? Stuff went on in the past. Okay, okay. I can't think of anything. I've got no examples. Someone may have broken my collarbone. You're like my cat. You're like the cat is to you.

You're like to me. Yeah, pretty much. Looking in my house, eating my chilli con carne. Okay, I'll wait under the hits. What have you walked in on when you've come home? You can text 4487 as well. Give us a bell this morning. It's a wet old day, particularly in the Southland, including Invercargill,

a lot of places without power as heavy rain and wind batters the region, causing havoc on the west coast of South Island as well. So I hope everyone's doing okay this morning. Well, I'll tell you what I wasn't doing okay last night, Ben. Walked in on a cat, the neighbour's cat, tucking into the chilli con carne on the kitchen bench. And then it's hard to convince the family to eat a con carne

after a cat's tried it as the entree. And I'm like, I'm not over at your house with my face in your whiskers bowl. No, true. Am I? No. Respect. Like if this cat was a human, we'd definitely be on an episode of Neighbours at War.

Antagonising me all day long, but what have you managed to walk in on? We'll get Justin on the phone. Another cat story, Justin. What happened? Hi, mate. How are you guys? Yeah, good. Thanks, buddy.

Yeah, good. Now, look, when I first started dating my missus, the first time i made a house and all that yeah so we're sitting here and all that so i was saying goodbye to her but but but as i walked into her bedroom yeah the cat like absolutely went mad i like he stood me like what you're oh the cat's hissing at you yeah and you you never you never relax when you know animals want to go. Yeah, like it is a male cat. It's always been with her the whole time, you know, for the nine years. And the first time she's had a male in her room in fucking years, you know.

So, yeah. Well, there we go. Thank you very much, Justin. But until today, yeah, yeah. The cat's got to, all right. Yeah, and you don't want to wake up with a cat just staring over you, do you very much, Justin. But until today, yeah, yeah. The cat's got to, all right. Yeah, and you don't want to wake up with a cat just staring over you, do you? No, mate, no. Hey, good on you, Justin.

We did a great job of brushing over what Justin said there as well. Yeah, all right. Now, Michelle. Hi. What you walked in on, but actually you weren't the one doing the walking in. Wow. Yeah, no, I got walked in on. Okay, what was happening? So I thought I would go home early and surprise my husband

by getting dressed up and being in bed. Okay, what are we talking here? You dressed up like the Cookie Monster? Let's just say very sexy lingerie. Oh, hey, that's good. Spice out the relationship. A negligee of sorts. Yes. And that's what happens.

Privacy of your own home, you know. Let's figure it out. If you want to dress up as a Sesame Street character and do what you do. You can do that. No, you're right. And then what happened? What happened? For some reason, we did have a problem with the en suite,

and my father-in-law happened to come. Oh, no. No, no, no. No. So as he came into the bedroom, he got a rather heck of a fright. Oh, no. Did you know it was him coming in the bedroom? Were you like, hey there?

Hi, big boy. It was kind of the handcuffs to the bed. I'm trapped. Or you could save it and go, I've been kidnapped. Thank God you're here. And that's not a quick exit when you're handcuffed to the bed, so you can't

quickly, you can't cover up. What did the father-in-law say? He ran out of the room as quick as possible. Did you talk about it again afterwards? Did you kind of bring it up or was it never spoken of? No. It's brought up at dinner parties and everything now. Oh, jeez.

You're like, at least you can do his unlock thing, mate. That brought us a lot of joy. You have yourself a great day. Thanks for sharing. No worries. So good. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. It is The Hits.

You've got Jono and Ben on a wet old morning, particularly in the South Island. A ute was blown over. Was someone in it? How scary is that? Just out of Dunedin this morning by the wild weather. West Coast getting into the neat too. Yeah, so. Earthquake

in Whakatane as well wild stuff out there Ben Exactly Yeah Pink coming to New Zealand on her summer carnival tour. She's going to be in Dunedin. She's going to be in Auckland and we've got five pink tickets up for grabs. If you want to play all the way through our game, five words.

Alana, welcome. Come on in from Auckland. Good morning. Now, why do you want to go to pink so much? Just give me a reason. Just a little bit's enough. Oh, she's just amazing. She's inspirational as well.

Okay, well, what you need to do is you need to match five words. If you get to the fifth word, you walk away with five pink tickets. Let's draw a line in the sand. Who are we taking? Name and shame. We'll be taking my husband and probably my two girls. Okay, they've made the cut. Congratulations.

And you've got an awkward fourth wheel that you need to bring along. Yes, I do. We'll have to tell the girls to sort it out amongst them. Yeah, right. Find it out amongst yourselves. Well, let's worry about that if we get to there. Let's try and get you there. Who do you want to send into the soundproof booth, Alana?

We'll go with Jono today. Alright, get on in there, Jono. Get in there. Get in there, mate. And we'll see if we can match five words with Jono. Alright, Alana, here is your first word this morning. Macaroni. Macaroni. Macaroni and cheese.

And cheese or cheese? Macaroni and cheese. And cheese or cheese? Macaroni and cheese. And cheese. Dozen is word number two. Dozen. Eggs. Eggs. Band-aid. Band-aid is word number three. Plaster.

Plaster. Pin. P-I-N is word for pin. Pinwheel. Pinwheel. And basket is the final word this morning. Basket. Basketball. Basketball. Hey, nice job, Alana. You played a really good game, a good quick game. We'll get Jono back out of the soundproof booth to see how we go. Matching five words. Okay, Alana, you're feeling confident. Oh, sort of. Okay, you, your husband, your two girls, and that random fourth person could be heading off to pink.

All right, here we go. Word one, $25 cash. Here is the $25 word I said to Alana. Macaroni, what did she say back? Macaroni pasta. No, I'm out on the first one. What was it? And cheese.

She said, I thought you might say macaroni cheese or and cheese, but we debated that. You didn't even say either of the options. The idiot went for a whole other third option that no one had even factored in. We're out from the get-go. I'm so sorry.

No, that's okay. What about us? What about all those times you said you had the words? Stop. Stop trying to insert pink songs into it. Let's quickly rattle through

and see how you would have gone with the other ones. Dozen. Dozen beers. Funny you should think that. Band-Aid? Plaster? Yeah, well done. Pin? P-I-N? Drawing pin?

Wheel and basket? Basketball. A couple in there, Alana, but I'm so sorry you didn't win today. Just glad I got through. Does that mean you're going to go off and listen to another radio show now? No, not at all. I'll be trying again tomorrow.

Oh, good idea. See, that's why we love her. Alana, number one listener, loyal. Even though we just spat in her face, she's still with us. Alana, you have a great day. Same to you guys. Thank you. Thank you very much for listening.

We really do appreciate it. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Selena Gomez, as we found out earlier, 400 million followers on Instagram, the most followed personality in the world as of now. Do you follow Selena Gomez? I do, actually. What was the last photo you liked

of Selena Gomez? I don't know if I liked. Maybe it was the one saying I've got 400 million followers, actually. I think I might have liked that one. Supported that? that one supported that yeah supported that but you know well we were just

trawling through her account before 14 million likes on a photo of her holding up a fish yeah I hold up a fish nothing

nothing on your Tinder profile you know no bites at all Ben you really left me yesterday I thought we were a team you know we come as a combo

there's an and in between our name and I felt that that was you know there was some sort of moral obligation from both of us if we find ourselves in an uncomfortable situation to stick there with your wingman now we fit it reminded me of these things because in public sometimes people come up and they're like you want to hear a joke and i can tell you get nervous oh we've had some spicy ones over the years. We've had some spicy ones. One guy kept going and I was like, hey, I had to walk away.

Well, that's what I was about to say. And I'm left there going, listening to this guy go, and so a Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. And you've run off and I'm having to politely laugh. No, you're not having to laugh at all. You're saying it's not appropriate. And you ditched me yesterday as well. Okay?

You left me yesterday. Three ladies. I don't want to age. Brandish to say late 40s. Okay? In that age demograph. They start talking about menopause. And you're like, I've got to go.

He'll stay here though. And they're like, great. You need to hear this. And I'm like, i am way out of my jurisdiction here you love a chat though you do love it i do love a chat but i felt like i was in a different league here there's no place for a man in a menopause chat and the conversation the general the general conversation was you know doctors need to be more open to offering up pain relief oh yeah to uh to

those currently going through menopause and i can see you're 20 meters away in this conversation i felt like it wasn't for me and i felt like it was an important conversation for them to have and but you love it you love a chat but it was rude if both of us walked away i know that's why one of us had to engage in the menopause chat And I was kind of flailing about, smiling Hopefully laughing at the right points I don't know if I offended people And menopause is a big issue You don't need me mansplaining on how it works

On the radio But I learned all the ins and outs of it yesterday And the big message was Doctors get some more pain relief out there For those who are going through menopause Oh well that's good to know See you've learnt something from it and you brought it to the radio And you made our radio a better show

I've also got a really good joke about a Chinese man No no jeez no No Oh god after 8 o'clock What happens when you leave me alone Ben Suffer the consequences After 8 o'clock on the show I don't even know what you've come up with

but you apparently have got an idea that you want to do this week yeah you're like oh I want to meet my hero

and I'm like jeez how many heroes can one man have but there's another one of your heroes who's coming to New Zealand yeah well it's involved

narrow down your list of heroes of anything got a lot of heroes I'm going to try and let you let you meet your hero again

thought I'd already tick that box but another hero apparently in 5 minutes the hits of heroes of anything. Got a lot of heroes. I'm going to try and let you meet your hero again. Thought I'd already tick that box, but another hero, apparently, in five minutes. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, Ben, we just mentioned a long, long list of heroes.

It's not a long list. I do have some heroes. I look up to people. Heroes occasionally let me down. Dwayne The Rock Johnson. Hero? Hero. Yeah.

Will Smith. Former hero. Well well I did like Will Smith where do you sit with Smith now is he still in like a haze you know

he's on the comeback thing everyone you know there are falls everyone's human everyone makes mistakes but he's fallen off

your hero mantelpiece yeah well he's not in the Mount Rushmore of heroes right now LeBron James basketballer. Yeah.

Hero. Ryan Reynolds is up there. Ryan Reynolds. Is he taking Will Smith's spot? Yeah, I think he's now up there, you know, one of my heroes. And Kevin Hart is another one. Yes, Kevin Hart. I'm very excited he's here tomorrow.

I got my tickets. My wife and I, Amanda, are going along to see Kevin Hart. He's doing stand-up at Spark Arena tomorrow night. Yeah. Now, what it is, as a very dear friend of yours, it falls on me. I've taken it upon myself to

let a little boy meet his heroes over the years. Dwayne Johnson went to extreme lengths. He even made you get a tattoo of how much you love him on your bottom cheek. And he remembers me. We've got some sort of a bond even though he meet you know so thank you and in a way yeah thank you no that's that's absolutely fine and i thought well bang

ticked the hero bucket list thought what more can i do and then you're like you mentioned last week oh my hero's in town another hero flying into town kevin hart you have reached a level in stand-up i have not even heard of before, which is you have pyrotechnics. Yeah, I did. I love you! I love you! Makes you numb!

The first comedian to ever perform in a football stadium. I need to hear that! This man needs no introduction. We're pleased to now welcome in Kevin Hart. The one and only Kevin Hart. Showtime. Is here tomorrow. Yeah. On his world tour. You've purchased tickets Showtime. Is here tomorrow. Yeah.

On his world tour. You've purchased tickets. Yes. I'm excited. So you're going to help me meet him. Well, here's the deal. Okay. And this is pulling back the curtain somewhat just through the complicated backroom negotiations

that have gone place. Our station not involved with the promotion of the Kevin Hart show. Right. Yeah. And I don't think he's been doing interviews regarding hasn't been doing interviews okay so uh i don't think we're going to get given an interview okay so i have an idea a concept okay that involves you getting the attention oh so not a guarantee of kevin hart not another tattoo not a tattoo okay there's only so much real estate on your sweet dairy air

for celebrities but it does involve it's a long day I won't lie it's a long day but how committed are you to meeting one of your

59 heroes well I'm pretty committed if I do it can I hear the idea like what I'll tell you what it is next okay because it

does involve some moving parts okay literal moving parts okay machinery heavy machinery what and it's a long day tomorrow and you could be now what i could say also is you might miss the show what but you may meet your hero i'll tell you what the idea is next and someone who's going to help us out with it. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. A lot of terrible weather, particularly down south today. Wild winds overnight. A little bit of snow as well. So everyone affected.

Think of you this morning as you make your way to work or school, wherever you're going. A huge got blown over with some of it. Jeez, it must be very windy there. So, yeah, thinking of you all. Now, Ben, tomorrow night, Kevin Hart, your hero, is here. You purchased tickets to Kevin Hart's concert. I have.

My wife and I, Amanda and I, were going along to Kevin Hart, very excited about seeing him perform stand-up. Now, there's one thing, seeing your hero in a stadium, but there's also another thing, being close up with your hero. What have you come up with? Like, what? I have taken it upon myself, again, generous. Another selfless act from John O'Prior.

When does the charity stop? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. It just keeps coming out of me. But we want to get his attention. Now, I have two options. Would you like to do it legally or illegally?

Legally. Legally. I'm not sneaking into your hotel rooms or anything like that Okay, good, because the illegal option featured minimal clothing and fraudulent activity So I'm glad you've said no to that Okay, there is a legal option That we have you waiting outside the arena, Spark Arena, where he's performing All day

Okay, we never know when he's going to come for a rehearsal, a mic check, or even if he just turns up for the show, what time. So we need to get ourselves some insurance that you're going to be there when he drives into the arena. Yeah, but lots of people go into the arena. They're all going to be there. Yeah, there's going to be a lot of people there,

but not all of them are going to be up high. It's a plan that involves a lot of people there, but not all of them are going to be up high. Okay? It's a plan that involves a big, long day. And if you haven't met him by showtime, then I'm sorry. You're going to have to still wait. Wait till after the show. You're going to miss the show. I have to wait till after the show.

Why don't you just say the show's the time? Do you want to meet your hero or not? Oh, God. Okay. So that's the plan. So that's the plan, Ben. Yeah, God. Okay, so that's the plan. So that's the plan, Ben. Yeah, right. And I know what you're thinking.

You're a logistics guy. This feels like a lot of logistics. I'm also thinking, is this going to work? But, hey, I'm prepared to give it a shot if you can pull this all together by tomorrow. Well, it's not just, you know, what do they say? Village to raise a child, don't they? Takes a village, yeah. Takes a village.

Takes a village. And takes a village to let a little boy meet his hero. And our dear friend Brent Riggs, Riggsie from Hyerpool, he's coming to the party, and you might be wondering what with Ben. Hey, boys, how are you? Good. Wonderful team at Hyerpool. You've helped us out of many sticky situations,

many novelty campaigns we've been a part of with you, Riggsie. You have. It's been a lot of fun. Now, what are you going to provide for us, mate? I'll tell you what. I'm out at our main access yard where our big scissor lifts and booms are hiding, and I'm looking at a 12-metre scissor lift

that we can put you up in the air and maybe get a bit of attention that way. You'll be scissoring your way up on the lift? Yeah, all the way up on the lift. Yeah, all the way up. Nothing grabs attention like someone up high, you know, higher than ground height. Oh, yeah. I'll tell you what, you're not as nimble as you used to be in your younger days, Ben, but 12 metres up in the air, you'll be able to touch the bottom of planes as they fly over.

Oh, Tom, it seems tight. That's a fact. That is a fact. Kevin Hart's not going to be up there. He's not going to be up there. That is a fact. Kevin Hart's not going to be, he's not going to be out there. Kevin Hart's very short. He's not going to be up that high, is he? But I guess we can bring me down, is that what you're saying? If he stops, we can bring you down, leave you up there, you'll stand out in the skyline

there. Well, it's 12 metres for an average-sized human, so 15 metres for Kevin Hart. He's going to be up that high. The reason being, Ben, is we needed to do something. Like, just a guy standing with a sign on a footpath, that's not going to do anything. You know, he sees that every day. Gotcha, so you need something attention-seeking.

But he doesn't see people up 12 metres in the air scissor-lifting. Okay, all right. Well, Rixie, I know I trust you. Health and safety, paramount of higher pull. You're going to make sure it's safe, I'm sure. You'll be safe, and I'll be on attendance. I've got my EWP license to make sure everything goes well for you guys as well. I have no idea what that license is, but it sounds important.

It sounds important, Ben. We've got Riggsie with an important license. Well, thank you so much again for helping us out. Great team at Hyre Pool. If people want to get any equipment, you name a piece of equipment, you can get it from Hyerpool. Where do they go to, Riggsie? The easiest way is call 0800 15 15 15 for all your hire requirements.

We went and cleaned some portaloos out with Riggsie, didn't we? We did. Yeah. That was a dark day, Riggsie. I know Ben went to a very dark place that day. It wasn't my heavy play, but hey, it's good to do. Someone's got to do it. There we go.

So that's the plan. We're going to look weird. We're going to look annoying. But that's no different to any other day. Okay, lingering outside Spark Arena so you can meet your hero. I'm there as well. I've a family. I've a family.

I'm like fend for yourselves tomorrow, guys. I'm making my friend's dream come true. Can I think about this and see if this is... No, we've just been booked in bloody scissor lift. Can I think about this? Oh, God. Too late, so... The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

The Hits is sending you to see Pink in London. Yeah, how incredible would that be, seeing Pink, London, Hyde Park? We've got tickets, two tickets. We've got accommodation, flights, and spending money as well. Hyde Park's enormous, 350 acres, Hyde Park. Seems like a lot of land to run security on. So now's when we tell you actually don't win tickets. We send you over there, you've got to jump the fence.

But let's welcome to the show Sarah from Christchurch. Welcome. Hi. Wild weather in the south. Are you's welcome to the show Sarah from Christchurch. Welcome. Hi. Wild weather in the south. Are you getting it in the neck in Canterbury today? At the moment, we're still really sunny. Okay. It's always been sunny in Canterbury for the last nine months, hasn't it?

Yeah, apparently it's the place to be. Now, you could be off to London. I do have to ask you, any previous criminal convictions that you need to share? No, no. Okay. Well, then you're good to go. Clear to go. Pass my security check there, Ben Boyce. ask you any previous criminal convictions that you need to share? No. Okay, well then you're good to go. Clear to go. Passed my security check there, Ben Boyce. What's the question? Well, you need to tell us what is the name of this pink song. We're going to play a little bit of it. Have a listen.

I'm never going to not dance again. Yeah, well done. It's too easy. I'm never gonna not dance. You are in the draw. All the very best. It would be incredible, wouldn't it, to go see Pink in London? It would be amazing. You have to sing the songs with a British accent, though,

so you blend in with the audience. I'm going to go. If there's enough Kiwis over there, I'll be fine. Have you been to London before? I have. What did you do? Wild, wild 20s years, were they? What went on? I did. I over there, I'll be fine. Have you been to London before? I have. What did you do? Wild, wild 20s years, were they? What went on?

I did. I moved there when I was 21. What did you get up to? Just the normal. Just the normal, yeah. A bit more responsible this time? Were you like, hey, no, we can do it all over again? Maybe.

Yeah, how was it? There you go. It would be an amazing show, Pink and Hyde Park. Good luck Sarah Are you driving to work and you're a hairdresser? I am Anything you can do with this? Well, we could shine it

Come in for a spit and pause? That's a sign of a puff it up Alright, thank you so much mate You're going to have a great day at Christchurch Thank you, you too Jono and Ben, a lot of power cuts, floods, slips Reports of a tornado, snowing as well Heavy rain hitting the South Island this morning

So thinking everyone as they make their way to work this morning Or school There's a big vague quick weather report there From Ben Boyce With all the disastrous weather hitting the South. More news coming up later today. But driving in the car, speaking of people driving in the car, as a lot of people are this morning, I feel like with your partner,

driving in the car can be a common place where heated discussions can be made, can happen. You were talking the other day about the temperature. You guys have debates, you and Jen. We can't settle on an appropriate temperature. She likes running it. She runs hot, I run cold. Okay.

Hot and we're cold. I think the wonderful Katie Perry, who we just heard from, she wrapped it up in a beautiful three and a half minute pop song. She had another song about it as well. But it also gets into the critique of the other person's driving.

That seems to be something that will happen. It'll slip in from time to time. If I'm driving the car, if Amanda's driving the car, the way we drive the car differently. driving that seems to be something that will happen it'll slip in from time to time if i'm driving the car from manda's driving the car the way we drive the car differently we just drive differently it's just what happens but you can't help but now and again subtly suggest things and find things with the other person's driving so okay i'll ask you honestly what could a man to be doing better on the roads well one thing that that irks me is she will use maps on her phone or whatever plug it in you know with that and then she'll go oh yeah i've got that and then turn it

off and i'll be like just keep it on it tells you exactly where you need to go with the streets and it gives you the you turn left and turn like that even when i'm driving when her she's driving if she's navigating with the map she has a lock she goes i've got that then turns the thing off and then i'll be stressing out particularly when i'm driving going well i'm turning it yeah i've got it i've got it all sorted and most of the time in a defense she's got it all sorted but really she's digested the information she's saving data i don't know what your problem is are you getting to the location yeah we are okay i feel like i'm getting extra stress because i'm like have you remembered just let the phone do what the to be. Yeah, we are. But I feel like I'm getting extra stress because I'm like, have you remembered,

just let the phone do what the phone can do. That's why we have the technology. But sometimes Google Maps throws you off course. Throw me off course for 10, 15 minutes. No apology from Google Maps. No, true. They need a sorry function. Yeah, I go, oops.

Oh, sorry, my bad. Listen, I thought we'd take a cheeky left here. I thought I was going to save you time. Turns out I didn't. You have some wins and misses on the road. That's what they could say. Yeah, I think you were right. The other thing that I'll get frustrated with as well,

and I shouldn't get frustrated, it's a little thing, but Amanda's car is different from mine. And it's not a European car, but it has the indicator and the window wiper. We have it on opposite sides. So every time she drives my car, I was driving yesterday, I'm like driving my car. the window wiper we have on opposite sides so every time she drives my car i was driving yesterday i'm like driving my car my window was gone every time she goes to turn and i'm like it's my car it's my car remember that and she's like i'm just an i'm an autopilot when it comes to those things and then she'll do it again i'm about you're driving my car it's my car remember the the window wipers they're flapping back and forth? They're going on and I'm getting in a flap.

You look like an absolute hot mess on the road, don't you? When you're meant to be indicating, but your window wipers are going back and forth. You're like, oh, here we go. No one's here for dear. Got the partner's car. I get it why it happens. And the one last thing is the tooting situation. Now, I know you get annoyed with me because I'm not a tooter on the road.

No, you're too hesitant to toot. Whereas if you're on the New Zealand roads, you know the rules. Before the lights even go on green you're honking at that car in front. Get on with it buddy. You're holding us all up. We've got places to go. Didn't you lean over and, like I was driving, I think you leaned over

and you aggressively tooted the horn. Well, and hey, we'd already gone through one entire light phasing when the person had held us up. This was the second phase of lights. I did hop on the horn, yes. And then everyone's looking at me going, oh, that guy's aggressive. And it was like, that was you.

The guy from the telly, the guy who used to be on telly. Lost his marbles. The other thing you could do with Google Maps too is have, if you're driving by yourself and you're missing the bickering of your loved one in the passenger seat, have a bickering function with Google Maps. Oh, you can bicker with it. Oh, I said second exit at the roundabout. I'm not listening to you.

You don't know. You know. Oh, that's good. You bicker back and forth with Google. Oh, I like the bickering function. A bit of a personal touch to the ALI. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, Kevin Hart in New Zealand's Tomorrow Comedian.

Reached a level in stand-up I have not even heard of before, which is you have pyrotechnics. Yeah. I did. Jono, we love you! Make some noise! The first comedian to ever perform in a football stadium. I need to hear that!

This man needs no introduction. We're pleased to now welcome in Kevin Hart. The one and only Kevin Hart. Showtime. Yes, Kevin Hart, The one and only Kevin Hart. Showtime. Yes, Kevin Hart, you got tickets to the show, Ben. You purchased the tickets, you and your wife Amanda. Yeah, I'm very excited about going along, although there's a chance I might not be able to go along.

What? Anyway. I'm giving you the chance to have a meet and greet. You haven't even purchased meet and greet tickets. I am giving you the chance to meet and greet your hero. Thanks to Brent Riggs at Hyerpool. They've come to the party. OTS Transport, they're going to be delivering this thing to Spark Arena.

Have a listen. I'll tell you what, I'm out at our main access yard where our big scissor lifts and booms are hiding. And I'm looking at a 12-meter scissor lift that we can put you up in the air and maybe get a bit of attention that way. You'll be scissoring your way up on the lift? Nothing grabs attention like someone up high, you know,

higher than ground height. I tell you what, you're not as nimble as you used to be in your younger days, Ben, but 12 metres up in the air, you'll be able to touch the bottom of planes as they fly over. Oh, 12 metres seems tight. That's a fact. That is a fact.

Kevin Hart's not going to be up there. He's not going to be up there. Kevin Hart's very short. He's not going to be up there high, is he? But I guess we can bring me down. Is that what you're saying? If he stops, we can bring you down, leave you up there. You'll stand out in the skyline there.

Well, it's 12 metres for an average-sized human, so 15 metres for Kevin Hart. He's going to be up that high. Okay, so what, the plan is to put me near Spark Arena where he's going to be performing up on the lift. On a sizzle lift with a sign saying, Kevin, you make my heart a flutter or something, you know, some heart pun.

Put it out on social media. Hopefully people will, like, bomb, and he'll come and stop on his way through. He pulls over in his stretch limousine. It's like that scene out of Pretty Woman. Next thing you know, you're Julia Roberts. He's Richard Gere. And I think we know what happens from that point on. That's my dream anyway.

And, yeah, thanks to the wonderful team at Hyrepool as well, and OTS Vehicle and Machinery for dropping off this hugely inconvenient scissor lift to a location. We're going to be those two people that Kevin Hart's team are going to be like, oh, there's these pests outside. What do you want us to do about them? We'll get you moved on or we're going to get a photo. We're going to be there all day after the show tomorrow by the sounds of it. So wish us luck.

It is the hits. You got John on Ben.