Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Hidden Voice Memos: The Last Edition!

Episode Date: January 15, 2025

In Hidden Voice Memos, we dive deep into the vault of our cringiest and most awkward voice recordings.  On the last edition of our Summer podcast, Megan's husband gets surprised by a string quartet, Ben throws back to his house party days, and do Teslas really fart?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Cheers to Dilma, making the world a better tea. You're the voice memo! We nailed it, this is the voice memo. We each clear something that's been backed up on our system in our voice memos. Something that we probably thought that not too many people would actually have. Backed up like a high fibre diet. Yeah, exactly.

But we've got hundreds, hundreds of these things filling up our phone. They must take up valuable storage space on your phone. All these voice memos. I don't know if many people would use the voice memo. No. Maybe just give it a little note. Remind us of yourself, maybe. Yeah. Potentially. But it's probably more of a

radio. I mean, musicians, I imagine, would use it as well. Yeah. Oh, with melodies and things like that. Or like travellers in far away lands discovering new parts of the earth. I've arrived. I love how you human him. Also I'm still thinking about high fibre

diet, is it the opposite of a high fibre diet backed up? Oh yeah, a lot of carbs. You said that originally I backed him up and then I went yeah, yeah and then I thought more about that and I went oh no, I think he's got A lot of carbs. Yeah. You said that originally and I backed him up. And then I thought more about that. And I went, no, I think he's got the opposite of that. Yeah, fiber actually gets things going, doesn't it? Yes, yeah, it does. Apologies.

Yeah. That's all right. I was sitting with that in my head. And then I agreed with something else he said. Other misinformation. Yeah. But yeah, we're going to start with you, Megan. Oh, OK.

So pushing this. New recording three. John, I set it up. Yeah. Should I, Megan. Oh, okay. So pushing this. New recording three. Do you want to set it up? Yeah. Should I? Yeah. I don't know what it is. So we got a string quartet, some friends that we knew,

to do a Lana Del Rey song at our wedding. But just before our wedding, they were like, do you want to come in here and make sure it's okay? So we went along, expecting to hear the Lana Del Rey cover. And they had a surprise, because my husband's a musician. They'd redone one of his songs, Burn It Down, as like a stringed arrangement. And I recorded it. It's a bit rough at the start.

Well, they figured it out. But it was actually... Sorry to the violinists. You're a bit shaky at the beginning. Also, they just listened to the song and just can play it. Wow. At this point, I think we were actually probably crying. It was beautiful.

It was beautiful. It was beautiful. Now, can you also play Burn It Down for me so I can get the reference? John, if you go down a couple there. What was your pin again, mate? 1-4-8-3. 1-4-8-3. Oh, no.

1-4-7-3. Cut that out. 1-4-7-3. Here we go. You know he's going to forget to do that. Yeah. Can you hear the violins in that? Oh, yeah.

That's the song that I helped write as well. My only song credit. If you want to listen to that on Spotify, that would be much appreciated. I'll get some royalties. That's pretty cool that you've been part of writing a song. What part did you write? The bit that you're listening to just now.

This one? Oh, not this bit. That's a bit harder, that bit. Did you write the music or the lyrics? Lyrics. That's a good song. Oh, that's actually an old version. Oh, so it's not the finished version, is it?

No, it's in the recording studio. Oh, well, there you go. You've got a bit of a behind the scenes. I was thinking, oh, the audio quality's a little... No, we were recording it in the recording studio. There's a better version of that. Yeah, right. Yeah.

That was very cool. That's a lovely touch. Did Andrew cry when he heard that? Yeah, we both did. We weren't expecting to hear it. That was just a little surprise for us. Now, he's obviously a wonderful singer. Does he sing, like, happy birthday?

Is he singing, you know, like, is he singing louder than everyone else? Nah. Singing around the house, singing in the shower sort of thing? No. All right. Nah. Because everyone's always like, does he sing to you? No.

Not at all. That's his job. I mean, we don't come home and do radio to the family, do we? No, but we talk. He likes to practice and warm up in private so that you only ever hear him be really good. Right. Gotcha. Yeah.

Okay. Singing in the shower? Do you hear him warming up in the shower? Not really, nah. Really? Yeah. It would be nice if he sung more, but he doesn't. No, I understand why.

You don't want to be, oh, yeah, I live with a singer. They've got these singing. Can you get the keys? That would get on your nerves. Yeah. What do you got to say, Ben, for the voice memo? I've got a fact. A fact?

Yeah, well, it's a fact from my daughter from years ago house party, remember we were all in lockdown we were all on house party and stuff it was in a game that we were all connecting in talking to people over house party Which daughter and how old is she? This was Indy back in 2020 so what are we

talking for? Four years ago she would have been eight years old and this is where I was like would you have a fact that she'd learnt from house party, talking to her friends? And there's one I thought, you know, Megan, you've had a rich history of facts of the day. Day, day, day, day, day. I would like to sing, but I need to save it for a public consumption.

He needs to warm up his voice. Like Andrew, I don't sing now. He wants you to hear him at peak singing. I thought it was a good little fact, actually, and one that hasn't stuck with me. Now I played it again, I was like, oh, yeah, that's a good one. All right, Indy, what's your house party fact? Birds don't pee.

Birds don't pee. Oh, really? Yeah, so there's my reaction. I had no more banter off the back of it. And she had nothing else to back it up? No, no, it was just something she'd learned from her thing. But it's surprising because birds do when they do other stuff and often you get that.

There's a liquidy texture, isn't it? Yeah, it's quite liquidy and it lands on you from time to time. I thought it was wheeze and poos out of the cloaca. Oh, right, all the same part. It's called a cloaca. It should be called a cloaca. Cloaca. Oh, cloaca.

Shut that up, you cloaca. That's where they do the eggs from too, out the cloaca, I think a cloaca. It should be called a cloaca. Cloaca. A cloaca. Shove that up your cloaca. That's where they do their eggs from too, the cloaca, I think. Cloaca. That's my favourite word, that cloaca. We've got a wood pigeon, which is a beautiful bird, but it just lingers around in a tree outside

and it literally waits till your car, to pull into the driveway and will just bang on the roof. And because it eats berries and everything, it's just- Is it drunk? Very tarry. Because sometimes they get drunk, hey, from the berries. Oh, do they?

Yeah. Well, it could be drunk and defecating. Honestly, probably three times a week when that pigeon's in that tree. Oh, really? Bang on the roof. Every time I pull him, and it's big, and it comes from- What do you mean? Like constantly banging on the roof?

No, like pooing on the car roof. Like literally sees it as a target. It's a little fun game. It is a fun game. Like if I was a bird, I'd love to play that game. It's a huge advantage you've got. I'd try and do it on humans. Be like...

Do you reckon birds when they, you know, you drive along and some birds swoop in and they swoop up, do you reckon that's them playing a game or that's them mistiming a fly? You know, like flying somewhere. I don't know. What, when they're on the road, you mean? Because sometimes, you know, they almost like swoop towards the car and then at the last minute,

they kind of go up. Yeah, do you think they're playing chicken? I don't know. Or is that just like, oh, jeez, jeez, I didn't see that car coming. I don't know. Probably.

Imagine if there was like a group of them in the tree and they're like, right, it's Jono's turn, go. Yeah. What happens if they're like, oh, he didn't make it? Well, then there's plenty more of us out there. He was a nice guy, I guess.

Now, this is some audio that I've stumbled across from 2023. Oh, yeah? Have you got the old plug there, mate? Oh, sorry. Your dongle. No, the old dongy. Gives us your dongle. Is that the technical term?

Is it a dongle? I think so. Oh, that's what we all call it. The dongle. Now, this is made about us. Yes, she has a Tesla. Okay. Have you heard this?

Yeah, no. Okay, have a listen to what the Tesla does. This is my friend Jessica, and she has a Tesla. And you've just discovered a function. What is it? It's a fart function. So fart mode. So from your cell phone, you can control your car when you're not here.

And what does it do? And you make it fart. How are you mate? So stupid. What is the point of that? I have no idea. Have you seen it? Is this your car doing that?

Caught him off... Is that your car doing that? Yeah. So out of all the things Elon Musk could have his scientists working on. I know. That's what happens when you have a billion dollars, but you're also like a child. Yeah, true, actually. Now, how do you feel about Musk? You had a crush on him for a while there, didn't you?

I think you've taken it back now, eh? He's in with Trump, and I can't get on board. Is that giving you feel about Musk? You had a crush on him for a while there, didn't you? I think you've taken it back now, eh? He's in with Trump and I can't get on board. Is that giving you the ick? He's also said some questionable things and I'm like, oh, nah, I've got the ick hard. How would you have felt about Musk minus the billions of dollars? If Musk just wandered in here, he's like, I'm just a humble IT repair person, just here to fix your computer.

Because I like his little weird accent. I like his weird shtick. You like his billions of dollars is what you like. Let's be honest. I think I liked his quirky shtick and his smart mind. A quirky IT guy comes in here. Do you want to see his dongle?

I mean, what's going on? He's like, I'd like to plug my dongle into your system. It's your clacker. Sometimes I like quirky dudes. He is quirky. He is quirky. I'll give you that. He's very quirky.

And he's doing some stuff. Again, he's one of those people that when 100 years from now, they'll be like, Musk, he propelled the race forward. Yeah. I feel like we'll forget About all the Controversial things And everyone will be like He was a genius

Wow I'm sure Einstein Did some wild stuff Back in the day But we remember him As a Don't ya Yeah

I'd say he probably Would've Yeah he looked like He would've said some stuff He would've said some stuff Anyway that was You're the Voice memo today. Thank you very much for listening.

Memo! Just solo on that one. No, I don't sing. You know me. I don't sing.