Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - July 31 - Stan Walker, Judith Collins, The Weetbix Challenge

Episode Date: July 30, 2020

On the podcast today we chatted to National leader Judith Collins and she had some exclusive dirt on the Greens!! We were also joined by Stan Walker who has a new single out today called Bigger, but we had a bit of fun making him watch his Australian Idol audition. He may hate us after that! We've had a bit more fun with Mike Hosking's car too, he gave us the keys (WTF, he must trust us), and now we can do what we like to it! Feel free to send us your suggestions. Happy Friday and enjoy the poddy!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Ben Boyce, you must be excited you're heading away this weekend, bit of family time, eh? Yeah, we've been working for about the last sort of ten weekends. I was trying to add it up, what's seven times, seventy days in a row? Yeah. Seventy days in a row. Well, they're having a day off and I mean, you know.

It's not real work, though, is it? We've just been filming a TV show with novelty dogs. It's been fun, but I am looking forward to having one a couple of days away with the family. Reigniting the relationship? Yeah, yeah. Trying some stuff? Yeah. What are you going to do in Rotorua?

Luge? Are you going to go luge-ing? I'm going to go luge-ing, zip-lining, that sort of thing. We went zip-lining there last time. It was lots of fun. So, yeah. Are you going to go on a Zorb? No, I've never of fun. So yeah. Are you going to go on a Zorb? No,

I've never been on a Zorb. I'd love to go on a Zorb actually. Yeah, but I've never been on a Zorb. I went on a Zorb once. It's like you're, it feels like you're in a uterus. Right.

Being shaken around, yeah, in a womb, in a womb, yeah, and then you sort of get birthed out at the end. A lot of fun things to do in Rotorua. Yeah,

there is, what else do I like about, oh, there's a lovely lake you can go and see, isn't there? Yeah. And a tree walk, apparently a lovely tree walk. So there's some things up there.

They do like mountain biking too. There's a wonderful mountain biking track in Rotorua. Yeah, they do, yeah. Yeah, there you go. So Ben Boyce stimulating the economy. That's all part of his plan, isn't it, to stimulate the economy? Well, yeah, it's nice to get out and about and back into New Zealand because obviously a lot of tourists around the country right now.

Yeah, and apparently local tourism is really starting to boom with Kiwis just going around spending Kiwi dollar on Kiwi things. Well, that's good. Yeah, I sound like an old boomer who doesn't like welcoming immigrants to our shores. Don't know when I say that. But it's important to look after your backyard, especially after a huge pandemic like that. Yeah.

You know, you really want to kick that thing back in again, and you're doing your part. You're getting your fingers out and massaging there, stimulating Rotorua this weekend. So good on you. Well, I'll give that a go. But in the meantime, you guys can enjoy our podcast this morning. We've got Stan Walker on.

Love Stan Walker, although he may not love us as much. No, and this was, you know know the worst thing is this was your idea and you feel terrible I do feel terrible about what we did to him yeah I didn't expect this reaction thankfully I had to ask him

off air afterwards I was like are you okay for us to play this and he was like yeah go for it which is good but then he walked out

and in the foyer through the window he was pulling the fingers out still a little bit yeah not sure what was going on so enjoy that on the podcast. The radio version of Morning Breath.

It's Jono and Ben on the hits. He's got a brand new single out today called Bigger. He's had hit songs, hit movies. He's not only a Kiwi legend, but a bloody nice guy as well. And he's got a brand new single. It's called Bigger. It's released today in both Te Reo and English. Stan Walker, how's it going?

Oh, bloody good. You know when Ben was going, he's a Kiwi legend, a bloody nice guy. I was like, oh, Ben, stop talking about me like that. Stan Walker was in the studio. I'm here. So the new single sounds very exciting. With Parson James in the US, you guys sort of collabed all during lockdown, really. Yeah, it was

actually really cool, I actually snuck to the studio to record the last parts of mine, but it was good because it was right there, it was still in my bubble, don't worry I actually got to leave at level 3 because I was a central worker, I had a certificate from the Ministry of Education

New Zealand needed this song It's the kura kaupapa people. So I was on my way to doing the videos and filming. It's essential New Zealand has a number one hit, a new number one hit. It's essential by the song. Now, it's also in Te Reo as well as English. Yeah.

How does that translate? I always find that interesting because obviously there's not like exact matching words in Te Reo compared to English, right? Oh, yeah. Like one, oh yeah. It's a nightmare. It is, but at the same time, like if we're trying to get the intention behind something,

like in Māori it's like poultry, it's like old women's Shakespeare. So if you get the intention and the feeling of it. I see what you're saying. So whatever you're saying in English, if you can sort of capture the same meaning in te reo, that's how you translate. Yeah, like happy, you're saying. So whatever you're saying in English, if you can sort of capture the same meaning in today, that's how you translate. Yeah, like happy, you explain happy. You know, for like you hear the word bigger,

it's like it's pretty self-explanatory. You are the bigger or like depending on the context of where it is. But for the word bigger, that means like it's looking outwards to be more. So in this sense, as bigger as like we can be more. Well, that's the whole message behind the song, right? To inspire people to believe in themselves, right? Yeah. Yeah, it was really cool doing it in Maori

and I got my niece to do the last chorus by herself. Oh, really? So she's a little star. I cried. I listened to it last night. I was like, I was crying. Oh, that's awesome. And the video as well filmed in Tauranga?

Yeah, on my marae, on my hill, on our land. And bro, it was so cool because I got my nephew to play the younger version of me. And he's the same age as I was when I used to stand at the top of the hill and I used to pretend I'm singing to thousands of people. And now that's like my actual reality. So it's a full circle moment looking back.

I remember we were doing the video and I was on the steps of the marae and we were doing the first shot of the day. And I was singing and I looked at the hill and I was on the steps of the marae and we were doing the first shot of the day and I was singing and I looked at the hill and I was like, I think I'm going to cry. Am I going to cry or am I having a heart attack? I was like, there's something wrong with my throat.

Well that's really cool though, to have something so personal to you. Yeah, it was like it just, like I've never, it was so funny because when I was listening back to the demo when my bro sent it back um i started crying because it was like it was like i was singing over my life to remind myself who i am where i've come from and who i've come from i've never had that experience of me crying to my own song and getting a revelation from my own song it's because

i was like it was during like level three that I got the demo back and I just was like, I was doing writing, doing my book at the time and just going over stuff in my life and where I've come from and it was like a reflection thing and I was like far out.

For a moment, I kind of lost my mojo and my passion. I was like, oh, I'm kind of over this. Like I just want to stay home all day, every day. And I was just reminded who the F I am.

I was just like, yo, this is where I've come from. This is who I've come from. And this is who I am now. And this is where I'm going. And I was like, man, it doesn't matter what season you're in, your purpose still remains. And I was like, yo, we on. Well, we've got Stan Walker with us in the studio.

Do you find, though, when you release something that's quite personal like this, you feel a bit more vulnerable? You know, how it's going to be accepted as opposed to maybe other songs with us in the studio. Do you find though when you release something that's quite personal like this, you feel a bit more vulnerable, you know, how it's going to be accepted as opposed to maybe other songs that don't have such a message that's personal to you? Yeah, yes and no

because I feel like there's going to be at least one person out there that is exactly in the same position that they need this and I was like, man,

like, you know, people go to like try and save the millions and billions and thousands. Like if I save or change one person's life that's what it's actually all about like I'm not trying to do this

I'm humble I just want the one person but honest to God because I'm one person somebody's changed my life and now I can affect other people so if I can change one person's life then they can affect

somebody else's life but it is it's quite useful if thousands of people are affected and buy the song. That's when it becomes... Infected or affected?

Now, can I say, Stan, you are such a fashionable guy. He can just pull off any outfit. Like, he's wearing linen pants today and I'm like, you look amazing. Is there nothing you can't put on and look great? You've gone through a few different fashion stages throughout the last decade.

Oh, well, Big Stan couldn't really wear this kind of stuff, could he? I couldn't really tuck in my shirt back in the rach, you know? But you managed to pull it off. You look great no matter what you're wearing. Thank you. I could put you in an apron and a tea towel and you would look fantastic. You know the crack up thing about these pants?

I was shopping with my little sister in Melbourne and I think my little brother too. Oh no, my little sister and my little cousin and I went into, I think it was one of the ladies shops because they always got the meanest pants. Like I can fit those pants now. And I walked in and they were on special. I was like, oh, these are on.

And I was just like, oh, what size is this? It's size 30, but in girls. And they're like, oh, I don't know. So we were there for ages. I was like, oh, so if my sister can't fit them, can I bring them back? They're like, what size are you? She's around the same size as me. I was like, oh, no, no, my sister, my girlfriend.

I was like, oh, these are for my girlfriend. I was like, so she can bring them back if she can't fit them. I walked out and my sister's like, what are you doing there? I was like, I got me some pants, but just act like they're yours. Now, Stan Walker, you've come a long way since Australian Idol. Holy heck. 18 years old on Australian Idol. Wow, and I'm turning 30 soon.

When was the last time you saw your performance? Oh, don't do this to me. No. No. And we wanted to get your reaction. Oh, no. And there's six big screens. We wanted to put it reaction Oh no Six big screen We wanted to put it on the screen

And see what Sam I hate you I hate you I hate you You looked You looked adorable I'm gonna swear I'm gonna swear

So here you are backstage You're with your guitar I didn't want to hear me sing He's too tall Come on Stan Walker's jumping up and down He's got his head in his hands your guitar. I don't want to hear me say it! Stan Walker's jumping up and down. He's got his head in his hands. That's not even me! Oh, shut up! Shut up! Wow, I hate that. I can't even watch it. He can't do it, he can't do it. I don't want to put you through it.

You look so young and innocent here. Oh, I was. And look, oh, fuck. Sorry to tell you this, Sam. So you're about to walk into the room. Are you nervous now? You must have been nervous on that day, though, right? He's like, you wankers.

I feel like we should do this out in summer. We'll stop it. We'll stop it. There you go. But you're 18 years old. You were working in a suit store. Was that right? Man to man.

Yeah, that's cool. Man to man. You know, I was actually the top salesperson in Queensland. Were you? Really? You were getting people suited and everything. Because I, honest to God, I used to get so bored. So sometimes I would bring the guitar in and I'd stand outside.

I'd be like, come into our shop. And you might let that down. I mean, 18 years old is young. You must have been so nervous going on a show like Australian Idol. Oh, hell yes. I almost left the auditions because we were one of the last people. Right. And I fell asleep in the grandstand.

And then I got up and I was like, Tim, I'm out. Oh, let's just go. I'm not going to get in. There's too many people here. Yeah. Well, then I won. You won, yeah. I won.

I stayed. That's amazing. Incredible stuff. So what happens immediately after that? Are you in a studio recording songs? Literally the next morning. Really? The next morning it was like 24-7,

like it was just boom, straight away. I went straight to, flew straight to Melbourne early the next morning, promo all day, then flew all over the country and then I think two days after that I recorded the album in two days and then it just kept on going going going

wow do you look back on that period of your life I literally look back because we made you do that and you're like we won't do that again honest to god

he's gonna end us I hope you follow Tripp over when you walk out of the studio do you look back on that period of your life are there fond memories of that time in your life

oh hard out fully like I had honest to god I had the time of my life. Like we moved into this big four-story mansion in Mossman in Sydney. And I remember the first thing they came to us and they're like, oh, what do you want for your shopping? Are we getting a shopping list? And I was like, oh, what can we get?

They're like, whatever you want. I was like, whatever we want. And like for me, I'm like, I come from very simple things. And I was like, oh, can I get Nutri- everything that I've never had. Can I get Nutri-Grain? Can I get Lee Snacks? Can I get Roll-Ups? Can I get Nutella, Dunkaroos? What else can I- Yeah, what else

do you want? I was like, I got all this stuff and it all came back. I'm like, little kid, I'm like, oh, I got Nutri-Grain! I got the Snacks! I got the Snacks! Roll-Ups! Come at me! That's awesome. Stan Walker, the new single out got the snacks. Full ups. Come at me. That's awesome. Stan Walker, the new single out today.

It's called Bigger. You're about to go on tour through dates through August and then in early next year as well too. Yes. Doing Good Vibes. It's going to be really cool. I can't wait to get up on that stage and like rip it up. Stan, always good to catch up. And apologies about playing that to you before.

No, you don't need to apologize. You love that. I couldn't do that with my old stuff as well. But I was just like, oh, wait. Yeah, but you don't look like that. You look adorable. Oh, don't say cute adorable. Adorable.

Okay, good to see you, buddy. This is your new breakfast. Health Star rating, still pending. It's Jono and Ben on the hit. It's been a crazy few weeks in Parliament. We've had affairs, we've had retirements, we've had F-bombs yesterday, and of course a new national leader, Judith Collins,

joins us on the phone again. Thanks for your time, Judith. Oh, good morning, guys. How are you? It's our friend, Judith. We're becoming besties, Judith. Besties that you only call once every two weeks. It's like how often Ben calls his mum, but that's all right.

It's been a crazy few weeks in Parliament. Have you enjoyed it? I know that's the wrong word, but what's it been like being leader for the first time? Well, do you know what? It was about time. It was about time. It was about time you became leader?

That's the one. Okay, right, yeah. I'm really loving it actually and everywhere I'm going people are so positive and friendly and I'm doing selfies all the time. But also I've had to deal with a lot of legacy issues

which are now definitely legacy and they're no longer, you know, they're in the past and I deal with them now because I've dealt with them. So there's a poll that was released yesterday. Obviously you know about it. You guys, the National Party went up a bit, but in the poll, Jacinda seems, and the Labour's seem ahead.

Do you take a lot of notice of those polls or is it something you're like, ah, they can change? They're an absolute snapshot in time. But what we do look is, you know, at the trends and things. And I really enjoyed the fact that suddenly I was, you know, 20% from preferred prime minister

and that 56, I think it was, percent of people thought I was doing a good job. So that's not bad after two weeks. Not many people as leaders of parties ever had to deal with what I've had to deal with for the first two weeks, but I've dealt with them. So, you know, it's all good. Well, Ben sent me some Andrew Falloon-type texts, and I was like, I've had to deal with those, Judith. I haven't had...

I tell you what, you're going to want to see some of that stuff. The other night, I couldn't sleep because of excitement. Because that's the trouble. You know, I have trouble sleeping because of excitement. I'm always thinking about, well, what's happening the next day? Or is this fun?

And I had a quick look at the Green Party health policy because I thought, well, that should get to me to sleep, but it won't now. Because they're going to, this is one of their latest crazy schemes, is that they want to have water only available in sports clubs. So what does that mean? No coffee?

So there you are, poor old parent on the sidelines, watching your kid get pummeled in rugby or something, or hockey or whatever, and you're standing there with no coffee. What about beers after the game? Yeah, in the club room sort of thing. Exactly, exactly. I mean, why would you put your body through all that hardship

if you didn't get to have a reward? Only if you could have a nice water at the end of the day. Just water? John is outraged. I'm so sick of these people. Stop telling everyone what to do and be in your posse boots. Oh, this is terrifying. Judith Collier, what's more terrifying is you're waking up at 3 o'clock in the morning

and reading the Greens health policy, but we'll tackle that later. What is she not across? Now, Judith, during the week, you made a mention at a gathering about when you were Minister of Corrections that no one escaped under your watch. This was the audio. When I was Minister of Corrections that no one escaped under your watch. This was the audio. When I was Minister of Corrections, nobody escaped. I think, Tova, you want to actually

understand a joke when you hear it. When can we determine that you're being factual? When my eyebrow goes up. It's a joke. So when your eyebrow goes up, we can't see you right now, so we're going to have to take your word for it. But hey, that's quite tricky to do, the eyebrow thing though, right, Judith? Well, it is, but you know, take it into practice. But

having said that, you notice the other thing on that audio? The cue, the laughter from the audience. We were all laughing. It was a joke. She's like, it landed. It landed. The gag landed. That's how you do a joke, Tova. We've done stuff, Jono and I, where we've told what we thought was jokes and had no

laughter. So sometimes it doesn't work, but it worked for you. Judith, what we want to do is we want to just road test a couple of new jokes that you can try out on your campaign trail. Okay, see if you like these. Okay, which population has the fastest growing population? Ireland, because it's Dublin every year. That's actually not bad. Not bad? These are from the internet.

We can't take credit for this. Do you know I got fired from my job at the bank today? An old lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over. Oh, I get that. Judith, what is that one?

That landed with Judith. Well, I tell you what, I'm looking forward to drinking nothing but water at my favourite sporting establishment. And don't ever think you can add sugar to that water because that's also on the band list.

They're going to investigate Levy on sugary drinks. Oh, right. I can't even pour Raro into my water. No, don't you have that Raro. Don't you have that. Judith says no. Well, actually, the Green Party says no. Judith Collins, thank you for your time this morning.

We appreciate it. We'll catch up with you in a couple of weeks. We certainly will. All right, Judith. Thank you. Some people skip breakfast, the meal for your time this morning. We appreciate it. We'll catch up with you in a couple of weeks. We certainly will. All right, Judith. Thank you. Some people skip breakfast, the meal, and also this show. It's Jono and Ben on the Hits. Now, Mike Hosking, he's on Newstalk ZB.

He works upstairs from us here in the same building. Yeah, he's a wonderful man, Mike Hosking. And we... Is he? Is he? Or is he a terrible human being? I don't know him well enough, but I'm going to assume he's a wonderful person. I assume everyone's a wonderful person.

But then I realise they've committed a series of murders, and I still think they're wonderful people. Deep down, everyone's a wonderful person somewhere. I'm sure you were just having a go at Ellen DeGeneres before. She must create that environment. And now you're like, oh, wonderful people. Without anyone saying that she did. I'm sure she's a wonderful person.

But Mike Hosking, we've taken his fancy Jaguar. He drives a new European car every week. We've taken it and we wanted to borrow it and lend it out to you for whatever tasks you needed to complete. And here's a bit of an audio recap of the journey so far. You park next to Mike Hosking. It's a Jaguar? A Jaguar.

He changes cars like I change underpants. Weekly. Oh, God. Why don't we borrow his car and give it away? Well, I'll throw it to the audience. I would love to use Mike Hosking's car on my farm. I would take Mike Hosking's car to the drag races. G is with us.

Yeah, Michael Lovett. Michael Lovett. We are down at the garage here at NZME. Super City Towing here. The Jaguar is up. See you later, guys. There we go. Let's have it off. And we're taking it. We replaced his car with a red Labour card.

Here is my car. This one's just as good. So, you stole my car. Everyone's happy. But we forgot to get the keys. Oh. You want me now to give you the key to my car. Fellow Newstalk ZB host Kate Hawksby, who's also married to Mike,

responded with a cute animal filter on their faces and voices. Well, that's fair. Yes. Are you upset by it? A little bit. Are you going to retaliate? You're going to get it back when you least expect it. I'm coming. So, yeah, Hosking is already planning revenge,

but in the meantime, the keys. We needed to get the keys back from Mike Hosking to give the car away to use the car because it's just sitting there at the moment in a secret location. And we called him yesterday. In the meantime, just a little favour. We forgot to get the keys. Oh.

Yeah, because we towed the car and we haven't got the keys. You want me now to give you the key to my car? Now, can I just say, Mike Hosking has taken this incredibly well for a man who's been the victim of a sloppily comical planned theft. Yeah. He's taken it very well. He got one of his people. He gave his keys to one of his people

who gave it to us. He's like, I don't want to see you face to face. I've donated more than enough time to you two. So he's given the keys to one of his people. We've got the keys. We've got the car. Yeah, well apparently he's driven in another European car today. So he's obviously doing okay.

I feel like the keys we have now, they're the keys to a better way of life, aren't they? So we've got the keys. So feel like the keys we have now, they're the keys to a better way of life. Yeah. Aren't they? So we've got the keys. So we want to put together some sort of plan to how we can loan it out to people. But this weekend, you're going to take it, Jono. Yeah, I'm going to take it just to a few events. Get some marketing out there.

Okay. And we're going to brand the vehicle too. Okay. Yeah. We're going all out. We're all in now. We're in deep. We're in deep.

We're going to call a sign writer after 7 o'clock. Wake up and smell them. Actually, no, please don't smell them. That's odd. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Every day on the show, we do this. The A to Z of New Zealand. Yeah, phoning every town and city in Aotearoa yesterday.

Cust. High rate of adultery and cust, they tell me. I don't know about that. You're one of the good ones. Do people cuss and cuss? Have you got a potty mouth, Lynne? What's your favourite cuss word? No, no, no. We're all very genteel here.

Lovely. It was Lys, Lynne and Cuss, which is North Canterbury and also Cuss marked the end of the seas. Ladies, we're through the seas. Oh, we're on to the D, because we're doing it alphabetically. Yeah, and we've taken so long to get to the D.

Yeah, there were some choppy seas we navigated our way through there. But yeah, D, and first on the list of Ds, Dairy Flat. Dairy Flat's a rural district, 8km south of Oriwa in the North Island of New Zealand. Until the 1990s, most of the district was just farms. Now, it's got a private airport, which is great if you like airports that are smaller than normal airports. The latest census claims there were 2,403 males, 2,424 females, giving a ratio of 0.099 males per female.

I don't know what the 0.1% of the male is missing, but let's find out as we call Dairy Flat. Good morning, Dairy Puppets. Georgia speaking. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Who's trouble? Who's trouble?

You're trouble. We're trouble. It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits. Oh, hello. How are you? It is trouble now. You are in a lot of trouble. What have I done? No, trouble. It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits. Oh, hello. Oh, yeah, it is trouble now. You are in a lot of trouble. What have I done?

No, nothing. Literally nothing. No, nothing at all. Other than answering the phone, we're calling. We're doing the A to Z of New Zealand. We're calling every town and city in New Zealand. And it's Dairy Flats' turn today. Yeah, you've called the Dairy Flat Vet Clinic.

Yeah, because it's D. You know, Dairy Flat alphabetically is the first in the section of D's of all of the towns in New Zealand. Ah, well at least you know the alphabet. Yeah, we do. That's actually why we're doing this, so we can teach ourselves the alphabet over two and a half years. Can you tell us quickly what Dairy Flat's got? What's the best

thing about Dairy Flat? Oh, we've got a pretty good bakery. Oh yeah? And other than that there's nothing else really here, just the vet clinic. You can't just say there's a bakery and a vet clinic. Is there literally nothing else to do in Derry Flat?

There's nothing to do, nah, but nah, just a bakery. Oh, there's an alcohol shop. Do they, at the Derry, do they sell a Derry Flat wipe?

No. Oh, okay, that would have been quite good. Could you pretend to enjoy his partner a little bit more? Like, if you've got

people at your house and you've got Derry Flatmates? Oh, my God. Like, if you've got people at your house, you've got dairy flatmates? Oh, my God. Oh, sad joke. All right, mate. The jokes are falling dairy flat, aren't they? Yeah.

Oh, my God. Oh, God. I'm just rushing to try and come up with one in my head, and I can't keep up. I can't keep up. Now, apart from going to the bakery, going to the liquor shop, or going to the vet. Isn't there the BP? Isn't there the magnificent BP in Derry Flat?

No, there's a tiny little gas station on the corner. Oh, there's a tiny little gas station. Let's not forget about the tiny little gas station. We can't forget the tiny little gas station, sorry. Okay, so then you're really painting a bleak picture of Derry Flat. I mean, I wouldn't make it a tourist destination. Is it more of a place you drive through and don't stop? Yeah, she's a drive-thru, yeah.

She's a drive-thru. Dairy Flat, she's a drive-thru. Well, thank you for sharing on Dairy Flat. Yeah, no worries. Appreciate it. We'll let you get back to your job. Listen, to be honest, I don't think you've done great things for Dairy Flat tourism,

but that doesn't matter. All good. Okay, you guys have a good day. You too. Bye. See ya. Oh, I guys have a good day. You too, mate. Bye. Oh, I never want to go there. The A to Z of New Zealand continues on Monday

as we continue to make our way through the D. Someone's just texted we didn't call Clive in the C's. I'm pretty sure we called Clive. Don't we? We'll do some research into that. We don't want any town uncalled. And if we haven't called Clive, we'll call do some research into that? Oh, okay. We don't want any town uncalled. And if we haven't

called Clive, we'll call him twice to make up for it. Okay, alright. We actually have called the same town twice, haven't we? That's right, but

by the time I was like, I'm sure we Collingwood or somewhere. That's right, I'm sure we know that one. Want more Jono and

Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Now Post Malone

Singer just went on the Joe Rogan podcast, one of the biggest podcasts in the world. Four hours he was on there. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook Now Post Malone singer just went on the Joe Rogan podcast One of the biggest podcasts in the world Four hours he was on there Four hours Four hours, that's a long podcast You wouldn't like that

You'd like your podcast to be snappy You would have been calling time at about 60 minutes I don't know how much it all got I guess they probably put the whole thing out But that's how long the interview was Four hours They just got talking about all sorts of stuff UFOs, mushrooms,

everything. Joe Rogan, I think he does that in a certain altered state. Yeah, right. Every one. And I think his guests do too. So I imagine him and Post Malone

just covered some ground. For more celebrity gossip, there's just a spy. Spy. The WhatsApp by doco.nz. She's been trying to keep up with the Kardashians

but it turns out they've got quite an intense cardio regime. Oh, have they? Yeah, she gave up and just started Googling stories about them. Producer Juliet was spy. So Sarah Ferguson, a.k.a. Fergie, a.k.a. Prince Andrew's ex-wife, is going to be a judge on a TV show called Dancing with Horses where celebrities do complicated dance routines with horses.

Kind of like synchronised swimming, but like synchronised horse dancing. Now, I don't know if you realise this, Ben, but traditionally, horses, not natural dancers. So I imagine they'd be quite clunky because I step on a lot of feet when I'm dancing. You don't want a giant horse hoof coming down on you. No, and I don't realise, yeah, horses, can they dance? I mean, you guys are doing your dog show.

Well, that's the thing. It's not really for us to throw stones at anyone else. I'm doing novelty animal shows. We're hosting a reality show to find New Zealand's most talented dog, and that's $100,000 prize money for... Who's I getting all judgy on, Sarah Ferguson? You're right. Let's just see what this is like.

Yeah, it seems like a great natural progression for the dance show genre. They've danced on wood, they've danced on ice, now they dance on horses. Yeah, and the executive producer, funnily enough, says that she was wonderful to work with as a host and a judge, unlike Ellen, apparently.

Oh, we're really hoeing it on Ellen in the six o'clock club, aren't we? Yeah, she's got quite a passion for horses and riding, just reading. Regularly attends Royal Ascot, being photographed on horses for many years. And, of course, Zara Tindall and Princess Anne,

you know, famous horse-riding royals, so maybe they'll cameo as well. They do love a horse, the royals, don't they? Do the horses have to put on those penis-y pants that they make all the dancers wear? Probably. You know, those sequined sort of... Yeah, like those tight pants.

I'm betting on it. I'm betting on it. And Ryan Reynolds, I already love him, but this kind of made me love him more who do you love more Prince Harry or Ryan Reynolds Prince Harry right

where does Ryan Reynolds sit in your top five probably three who's number two oh I don't know Harry Styles oh okay that's a good top three

that's a great top three thank you two Harry's and a Ryan so he so a Canadian woman had a teddy bear that contained a recording of her late mother

and it was stolen or went missing during, I think it was a hectic house move, they said. And Ryan tweeted saying, I'll give $5,000 to someone. He must have stumbled across the story or something. And he said he'd give $5,000 to whoever returned it. And it returned and it got safe. It was safely returned. Yeah, because the mum passed away and sadly, she recorded her voice on the beer.

And so that was a nice thing that they had, you know, to hear their mum and obviously someone else took it. So what a wonderful thing Ryan Reynolds did. What a guy. What a guy. Have you ever been to that bloody Build-A-Bear on the Gold Coast? Well, that's what this thing was. It was a Build-A-Bear.

Oh, it was a Build-A-Bear. Yeah, it was. Oh, jeez. Build-A-Bear. Now, Bill, you go into this thing and you need to construct the bear. And, gee, they have a laugh because you can get your bear for your stock standard 50 bucks, but it's the accessories that get you. Yeah, it's accessories.

And then all of a sudden it's like, why have I got a bear? Then my kid created a bear that's a firefighter in leather pants on roller skates holding a handbag with a cowboy hat on. All the different outfits, shoes. They even had NRL teams. You could put your bear in an NBA stuff. They have everything. They have it well covered.

That's so cool. They do. But they charge through, though. It's the most expensive thing. It's more expensive than my house. But you go in first and you go, oh, the bear. Okay. That's reasonable.

This is the job that a toddler should be doing in a Chinese sweatshop. But okay, we'll do the heavy lifting. It's the top end of price for a bear. But then, you's reasonable. This is the job that a toddler should be doing in a Chinese sweatshop, but okay, we'll do the heavy lifting. Top end of price for a beer, but then you're right, they add in all the accessories. That's what it is. But you know what annoys me about that? Because I'm in the shop and I'm playing along being the nice dad. Yeah, put a roller skate, some machete on your beer, I don't care.

But what annoys me is in a week, they're not going to care about this beer. Yeah. So I look after the beer now. I'm like, this is my beer. Sounds like someone needs to build a bridge and add it outside the beer. Get over it. For more spy on the Hits.com.nz Making poor life decisions every morning.

It's Jono and Ben on the Hits. Now it is Friday, the last day of July. Oh, Dry July. I know Stace, Mike and Inega are broadcasting from a pub to celebrate the end of dry July before we move into obnoxiously intoxicated August. So they've all been doing dry July. Have they?

Yeah, they have been. So have we? Have we? Yeah. Have we? Oh, yeah. Doing great. I don't know if we have been.

But then it is still July though, right? So if they're at a pub, are they just sitting there quietly until midnight? Finishing one day early. Yeah, true, true. But I mean, hey, we're not that committed to this radio station. We're going to work on the weekends, are we? Unless I'll get out of control here.

Now, I wanted to pitch something maybe for next year for Dry July. Now, Weet-Bix, we all love them, you know, right? In the mornings. But apparently eating a Weet-Bix without any milk is quite dry. So I've got producer Juliet's Weet-Bix here right now. So your comical twist on dry July is... We just have a dry Weet-Bix. So we can still drink alcohol, but you just eat one dry Weet-Bix a day.

How do you think that? I don't know how it works. I don't know how hard it is to eat a Weet-Bix without any milk. See, you've done no prepping to this. You've done no thoughts. You're just like, why doesn't everyone eat one wheat brick a day? I don't know what you do with it. I don't know what you're meant to do

with it. Well, let's see how this goes and afterwards I might go, this was a great idea or this was a bad idea. I don't know who there's benefits apart from anyone apart from Sanitarium. They're the only ones winning out of... Well, there you go. We'll give them a nice plug for New Zealand's number one breakfast cereal it says on here. Okay.

Let's make a game out of it at least. Okay. All right. You're not happy with my just getting a dry Weebix? Dry Weebix are like a dehumidifier for your mouth, literally sapping every last bit of moisture in your body. I've never done it. I've never had a... Have you produced it? I have, and it's just horrendous.

So good luck. Yeah, it's like getting a mouthful of sand. But I love Weebous. Yeah, it's like getting a mouthful of sand. But I love Weet-Bix. Yeah, I know, but there's meant to be like a little bit of moisture involved. Yeah, right. Yeah, so okay,

we're going to eat it and we'll play a game, okay? If you talk to producer Juliet, she's going to try and understand what you're saying. Am I closing my eyes? I guess it doesn't really matter, does it? Well, if you want to close your eyes,

you close your eyes. I'm not the boss of you. If you want to do radio with your eyes closed. If you want to pretend this doesn't exist, then that's fine. Pretend you're on a better show, then you can do that. Imagine yourself over to Fletchbourne and make it. Oh, gosh. All right, I'm going to try it.

Keep chewing for a while, by the way. And if you've just joined us, New Zealand, yes, you are Listening to the sound Of a man eating Eating food Put the whole thing In your mouth Put it all in

Put it all in There we go It's not the first time I've said that Okay Okay Now talk to Juliet She's got to try

And understand What you're saying It's like a dust cloud Bursting out of his mouth A like a dust cloud bursting out of his mouth. A weedy dust cloud. What? Say it again. I can't take you serious.

I literally cannot understand. Give a clue as to what you're saying. I hope you something and Jono. I like doing the show with you and Jono. Who do you like working with better? Me or Jono? Was that it?

Yeah, yeah. Oh, the wee bits. Was that the question? No, the question was, well, it was more of a statement. I'd rather be doing the show with you than Jono. Oh, there you go, there you go. Oh, okay, I didn't pick up any of that. I heard I love my friend Jono.

Oh, there we go. All right, go. Oh, he's shoving it all in there. We're really getting in there. Okay. There's a man ending a Weebuck with no... We're talking to Stan Walker after 8 o'clock. As you go, yeah, this is like a cloud of dry Weet-Bix everywhere.

Oh, God. So I don't know if this has got legs, dry as you like, but anyway, this is my version on dry as you like. Ironically, this is soaking up every last bit of vodka we had before 7 o'clock this morning. It's worth a drink. We apologise in advance. It's Jono and Ben on the X. Now, a couple of days ago, we took Mike Hosking's car.

He does the breakfast show on Newstalk ZB. Respected broadcaster Mike Hosking, we have his fancy Jaguar I-Pace. That's right. It's just one of his many fleet of vehicles that he owns. We replaced that car with an old 1990s beaten up Toyota red Labour vehicle

for him. He's a big supporter of the Labour Party. I guess he's not driving it today. He's got another European car. So he must have a few cars. So I think Mike's going to be... Where's the Labour car? I don't know. What's he doing with it? I don't know. Mind you, I shouldn't be throwing, so I shouldn't be worried about our car when we've got his car.

Yeah. A tit for tat, isn't it? Fair enough. We should be relaxed about that, but we do need to get that red car back. We do, actually. We only borrowed that one. I know it's a fifth of the price

of the one we took off him, but anyway, I'm going to have it this weekend. Mike Hoskins' car. Mike Hoskins' car. Because I'll have it this weekend, you have it next weekend. It's like we've been

married, we've divorced, and we're swapping the kids over. Yeah. Okay? The car's worth, yeah, over $100,000. It's like nearly $200,000.

Really? Mike Hosking was saying it's nearly $200,000. So next week, you guys listening, you'll be able to borrow Mike Hosking's car for whatever you need to.

We're dropping kids off at school. I don't know, doing some chores in the farm. Yeah, we need to work out the logistics and the insurance around it as well too, which is obviously there's a lot of... Maybe you're a builder and you need to transport all your tools and wood from one location to another. We can do that. We can do that.

Hopefully. Hopefully, yeah. But we need to do some marketing for the car. We need to brand it, don't we? We do. Yeah, get some signage on it. Because if I know Mike Hosking, I know he would love stickers all over his car.

Yeah, he would like people to know that we are driving around in Mike Hosking's car. So we're going to call a sign writer. I'm not really sure how it works to get sign writing on a car. We're going to call Colourworks right now and see if they can help us out. Colourworks, Emma speaking. Hi, Emma. Hello, Emma. Hi.

This is two innocent people just inquiring about some legal sign writing. Some legal sign writing? Yeah. All above board sign writing. All stuff. We can help you with that. Okay, yeah. So Jono and Ben from The Hits are here. We have a car.

We need sign written. Okay. Yeah. And what are you wanting on that car? We're wanting Wynne Mike Hosking's car. Thanks to Jono and Ben. Maybe live like Mike. We quite like that phrase, you know, like win this car.

Yeah, absolutely. We can do that for you. No problem. When are you wanting it done? I don't know. It's 24 hours. I don't know how sign writing works. What's a reasonable time frame?

Three to four minutes. For you, we'll make it happen. Yeah, three to four minutes. No drama. I don't know how sign writing works. What's a reasonable time frame? Three to four minutes. For you, we'll make it happen. Three to four minutes. No drama. I didn't want to set an unrealistic... Yeah, it's a good point. We just slap it on. Good guy.

Now, Emma, do you know I actually had a foray into sign writing as a teenager? My neighbour was a sign writer, Terry. Yeah. And Terry had the contracts for the... Okay, I don't know if Emma really... She's a sign writer, Terry. Yeah. And Terry had the contract for the... Okay, I don't know if Emma really... She's a sign writer. Emma's got stuff to do in her day.

She doesn't need the ramblings of... I love hearing stories about Terry. Terry. Yeah, so Terry was a sign writer. He, back in the day, had the contract. You can hang up any stage if you want, Emma. He had the contract for the tennis tournament. Oh, wow.

Now, this might be of interest to you. Back in the day for tennis... It's not of interest to me, but... They didn't have digital billboards, obviously, back in the 1920s when I was a child. No, no. You know, they used to actually paint. Technology had advanced from painting.

So we would have little bits of core flute that we would squeegee, you know, sticker names onto. Oh, yeah. And that was my summer holiday job. I'd have to squeegee all the tennis players' nicknames onto little bits of core flute, and then they'd be put on the billboard

at the tennis centre there. Have a great day, Emma. Thank you. Thanks for the story. I look forward to doing the work. Did you enjoy my story? I did, I did. It was great.

Do you want to ask me if I enjoyed it? No. Your face says it all. It says you loved it. I really checked out midway through. Emma didn't. She was polite. She was.

She was the business, mate. Hey, love your work, Emma. All right, cool. To be honest, I haven't seen your work, but we're about to see it and we will love it. Okay, see you later. All right, so the car's getting signwritten today. And after 8 o'clock, I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do with the car on Sunday, Ben.

Oh, you've got some plans. It's a big surprise. I don't know what you've got planned for Mike Hosking's car, but I already love it. Max has come in with the vacuum cleaner after your dry July antics, Ben. He made us eat dry Weet-Bix and... Made quite a mess. Like starting your day with Panda Eyes. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now Prince William,

when he was first together with Kate, he was just talking about this yesterday on a radio show. This was the gift that Prince William, you know, a royalty, a royal man, gave. I'm aware of Prince William. You know who he is. You don't have to sell him up to me. I respect him. I'm just saying, you know, he's probably

from, you know, from wealth. You know, he got a lot of money, but this was the gift that he gave. I respect him. I'm just saying, you know, he's probably from wealth. You know, he got a lot of money, but this was the gift that he gave. I think he gave my wife a pair of binoculars once. What was he thinking? That was early on in the courtship, that was. Tell you what, I think that sealed the deal, really. But did you wrap them? I think I was convincing myself about it.

I was like, yeah, but these are really amazing. Look how far you can see. She's looking at me going, they're binoculars. Like, what's going on? It didn't go well they are great for saying things he's got a good point look put them on look you couldn't see over there without these yeah look at that he's 150 meters away he also said uh he now realizes that was a bad gift uh you know but yeah he gave it a bash but i mean he's also like i've also provided

you a palace like if you're gonna start throwing shade about the binos, mate, take a look around where we're currently sitting. As we mentioned before the ads, Ben, you had a wonderful history of gift giving, where you gifted your wife a frying pan. Yeah, I was part of a collection of presents. And I was trying, I think I explained this on radio the other day. I was trying to listen to things that we, Amanda, you know, felt that we needed. Which is good because, you know, you're always not listening.

Hey, finally, the first time you do listen, it comes back to bite you. So this was, you know, I got some jewellery, I got something else, and I got a frying pan. And, you know, this was part of a trifecta of presents. He also got her a vacuum cleaner. The frying pan seemed like we focused a lot on the frying pan and less about the other gifts. Yeah.

So anyway. Did she love that frying pan? No. No, because every the frying pan and less about the other gifts. Yeah. So anyway. Does she love that frying pan? No. No, because every time she'd use it, she'd be like, oh, this one, eh? This frying pan. The anniversary gift frying pan. And I'd be like, ugh.

I've been looking through the internet. You know how you got every year you buy a different thing for whatever wedding anniversary it is. Oh, do people do that? Yeah. Well, and no stage on this top 100 is a frying pan. Oh, really? Yeah, no, it never comes through this top 100 is a frying pan. Oh, really? Yeah, no, it never comes through.

I'm playing my own game on that one. But I wouldn't recommend it. But we thought we'd throw it out there this morning to make me and Prince William feel slightly better. What's the worst gift that you've given for someone? Have you bought something and in hindsight you've gone, uh-oh, I shouldn't have done it. You gave me shampoo last year for my secret centre.

Yeah, and I was like, thanks, mate. I hope you get it there as inspiration. You'd have it there and your ear would go, I'm coming back. I'm coming back like a Rocky movie. I'm coming back. The follicles would see it. Get inspired. Yeah, we could do this. We could pull ourselves back out here, guys. Okay, 0800 HITS 4487, the text.

What has been the worst gift you've either received or given? Tārātū. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. It's lovely to have you on, Sandy. Oh, it's great to be on. What was the worst gift you've either received or given. Tārātū. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. It's lovely to have you on, Sandy. Oh, it's great to be on. What was the worst gift you received? What was it? An electric jug.

Oh, you got an electric jug. So who is this from? From my husband, because that way I wouldn't have to get up and turn the jug off because we didn't have one that switched off. So there's a thought process behind it. I can see. It's just like sometimes the guy's thought process doesn't match

up with what their partner's expecting. Yeah. So when you opened it up, you were like, wow, a jug. Yeah, that was not quite what I said. You tell us what you said, and I don't want you to hold any punches. No, maybe not. I don't know if it's safe for 7.33 in the morning.

Thank you for your call. We appreciate it. Thank you. Good on you, Sandra. Cheers for listening. One of the most important jobs as a parent is convincing performances of when your children have done something. When they gift you something, you're like, oh, thanks for this breakfast of Lego and custard.

It's so nice of you. Or thanks for my Christmas present of half-eaten raisins and nuts and stuff And those are the sort of gifts you receive from children, isn't it? No one's putting any heat on the kids No, the kids don't Thanks for taking a Sharpie pen and drawing the whole family on the kitchen wall Oh, that's so beautiful

So beautiful Let's go to Auckland, Maria Welcome How are you, Maria? Yeah, good, thank you I made your name sound very exotic Didn't it? Like some sort of Spanish temptress was on the phone

It's Maria Maria Maria What was the gift you received mate? So I'm a Teacher and I had a student Father go to Las Vegas on a conference And he brought back gifts For the teachers of all his children,

and we all received a mouth pad, because, you know, those are still used so very often these days. But the real kicker was the ashtray, because, you know, we spend all day just smoking out the windows in class. Do you smoke? The ashtray had the text, Las Vegas, what a wild ride. With a half

naked cowboy with a lasso on it. What a wild ride. I can see where he bought it though. But you know, who else did he buy gifts for if he's buying gifts for the teachers of all of his children? He must have bought a lot of novelty

gifts from the gift shop. Yeah, yeah. It was quite impressive. That one went on Facebook for a bit of sharing. Yeah, well that's almost worth taking up smoking for, isn't it Maria? Oh, totally, yeah. Alright, Maria, you go and have a great day, Maria, Maria. Thank you. See you mate, and we'll

go to Francis in Hamilton. Worst gift you received for anyone,, was it? Oh, I got sent my brother's toenail. Oh, that is the winner. What? We've got a winner. Oh, no. I was over in London, you know, doing my big OE.

Yeah. And it was my birthday, and I got this lovely card, obviously, from my brother. And I was like, oh, well, it's so nice that he sent this one to me. It's fantastic. And I opened it up, and there were his toenails. And, you know, it wasn't just, like, oh well, it's so nice that he sent this in to me. And I opened it up and there were his toenails and you know, it wasn't just like little ones. He's obviously grown them for like six months or something. Oh, now what you're failing to mention here, the details you're leaving out is you're an avid toenail collector. So this was

quite a thoughtful gift. Actually, he'd taken the time to grow them out extended lengths. Well, actually, no, no, that wasn't the case at all. I had never, ever bought anything out of toenails before my brother. So it was kind of out of the blue, you know, like, oh, why would you send me your toenails? So this was purely by accident or he just decided it was a good idea? I think he just thought it was a funny thing to do. I didn't quite see the joke because, you know,

why would I want his toenail? Oh, Frances, that's fantastic. And a text here, 4487, to finish on. My auntie once gave me a Visa Prezi card that she'd already spent. It had 53 cents on it. I just thought that counts. Lou in calories and Lou in laughs.

It's Jono and Ben on my hits. You know, I had that conversation yesterday with Jen that I think most couples sort of had. What's that? One of the kids needed to be picked up. Right. But we're both at work, okay? We're both working.

Yeah. And so you'll sort of have that inevitable passive-aggressive conversation about whose job is more important. Oh, sort of stand-off. Yeah, who needs to take the hit and pick up the kids. Now, I've always struggled to prove that this job's more important than what she does. Because, you know, all we do is we play a pink song

every 10 minutes, tell everyone what day and time it is. And just talk rubbish in between. Sometimes we do a bit of pranking in between, but it's hard to justify that as a job. But thankfully, you know who saved me? The New Zealand government. Because during lockdown, we were deemed essential workers. Her line of work is important as well.

It's in marketing. But she also works in radio as well, too. I know. I know. But she's not essential. She was not deemed essential. So I'm like, well, Jacinda decided. Yeah, true.

So I pulled in the Jacinda card yesterday in the combo. I was like, well, Jacinda, I'm essential. I need to be here. I can't go and pick kids up. Have you heard that conversation? Oh, yeah, we have it quite often at home. Even stuff like the dog, you know, we've got a dog. It's stuff that happens on the lawn from the dog needs to be picked up.

And then you spend your whole time going, I need to do this because my job's important and I'm doing this. But you can't argue with Amanda. She's a teacher. That isn't an actual important job. She can't just leave there and leave the kids with, you know, some vapes or something

to vape or smoke on. And then I'm like, oh, and if you bring up the fact, oh, you finished at three anyway. She goes, oh, I have not finished at three o'clock. You know, because they don't finish at three.

Anyone that knows a teacher, it's not like a three o'clock walk out the door thing. They're staying there late. But it's not as important as your job, Ben. You said, yeah, you may finish at nine.

Yeah, I know. The gentlemanly hours at nine a.m. I can't use that anymore. I just thought of that. But what I was saying is when you're headed into a relationship.

Oh, that's a good comeback. Yeah. Has she used that? Because Amanda, if you're listening, use that. He finishes at nine. He's got nothing.

He has literally got nothing. I've got stuff going on. It's important. I'm out here doing God's work on the cold face. Oh, the stuff I'm doing after nine. So much stuff. But you know, Juju, you're not in a relationship now, but when you enter into it.

Thank you, yes. With whoever you decide that you want to give your wonderful heart to. Yes. First thing you do is go, whose job's more important? Okay, you draw that line in the sand because no one ever tackles that. You need to front foot it. You need to front foot it and then from that day forward, it doesn't have to be a conversation.

Or maybe that's the thing. What do you do for a job? You ask that question and then go, would you say it's more important than my job? Then you know. Yeah, Cindy said mine's essential, so. Yeah, exactly. That's what we can all go back on.

So, yeah, that's just a bit of a public service announcement for you all out there. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. Jono, you were just talking about revolving doors. Oh, yeah, the traumatic revolving door experience where every morning I have to navigate my way

through a revolving door and it gives me great anxiety. And I walked into the glass frame today. We were wondering what the point of a revolving door was. We thought maybe it was a status thing to look a bit fancier than normal doors. But someone just texted her on 4487 and it's to do with a couple of things. But the weather. Keeping cold weather out. Yeah.

Which makes absolute sense. Because I guess if you've got doors that are open and closing all day, cold air is just blowing into the lobby. Yeah, so you don't get any drafts in there. A draft doesn't come through. It makes perfect sense. I feel like an idiot for even asking why they're there. And I also got stuck.

You know how you start Googling something and you go, oh, that's interesting, that's interesting. The guy who invented the revolving door also invented it because he hated awkward door situations. So when you go out to the door and you're like, oh, you go, I'll go, oh, who opens it? Push, pull on that side, all that sort of stuff. After you, he hated all that. So he invented a door where basically everyone could walk up and through at the same time. You didn't have to wait for anyone.

That must have really been bugging him. For him to go to the length of designing a door. I am sick of this. And I'm like, mate, just give it up. Look, I've had a few awkward door interactions, but never enough to go, you know what? I'm going to give up my job and focus solely on a solution for this problem.

Everyone's like, no, I'm going to do it. There you go. You never say you don't learn stuff on this show. Oh, that's really interesting. Because we just go onto Google and repeat it. Yeah, well, hey, I never took the time to do that, but now we have, and I feel a better person for it. Buy the What's Up spy.co.nz

If celebrities are on an island or in rehab, she'll be giving the juice on them producer Julia with Spy. So Elton John's electricity and gas bill is almost $100,000 a year is what he pays for his home in Windsor and the Queen pays over $2 million

to power up Buckingham Palace a year. $2 million? Yep, so a few stats on those two have come out. You would not like that, Ben. You're a turn-off-the-power-lights guy, aren't you? Well, that's ridiculous. Surely she's got to make some savings, get a revolving door in there. Yeah, exactly, exactly. Keep the drafts out.

What's Elton John spending $100,000 on? It's just literally power and gas. Well, he's got such a big house. He's got this massive estate in England that so many rooms and it's just the cost to run a big house

is probably... Oh, yeah. I imagine the old heat pump would be working overtime, wouldn't it? It's the Elton John's house. You know, we're talking to our boss, Todd.

He knows someone who made Elton John a glass statue in New Zealand. A glass... Not a statue you'd put on display. No, no. Right. No, a very special glass statue. Right. But made in New Zealand. A glass statue. Not a statue you'd put on display. No, no.

A very special glass statue. But made in New Zealand. And isn't that nice to know that there's a piece of New Zealand that Alton has inside of him. Right. And changing the subject. Kendall Jenner, one of the Kardashian clan, you could say she

has revealed, she's given a home to her for the first time. She's not usually one to be quite, to be open about her personal, personal life, but it's revealed that she has a solid gold bathtub that she bathes in. She has the measurements of a man's manhood

you could say, and a neon pink sign in her living room. She also, which I found quite interesting, she removed the TV from her living room because she wants to focus on when people are around. She likes to actually have a conversation with them rather than take away the TV. And then she also had a home theatre but got that changed into a room for her

to do painting in. She's quite wholesome, isn't she? Oh yeah, but a goal. But I mean, you run out of, when you're that rich, you run out of stuff to buy, don't you? Yeah. What would be the most lavish thing you would purchase? Get all the money in the world. All I've got is a revolving door stuck in my head. I'm going to insert a revolving door into my bungalow. There's all good interactions.

Couriers come up to the house, you're like, whoa, there you go. Probably make it more awkward in a home situation, wouldn't it? Well, yeah, you don't want to cause the revolving... Well, anyone can just walk into your house, Ben. Hey, what are you? Come back. Yeah, you're chasing the brown bay. That's what I'd do right now.

Okay, so Ben would purchase a revolving door, an unnecessary revolving door for his house. Wake up full of shame. Wake up with these guys. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Mike Hosking's car, the Jaguar I-Pace. A fancy car he was parking in the garage next to producer Juliet. We decided that we would borrow it with a tow truck.

Here's how it all played out. He parked next to Mike Hosking. It's a Jaguar? A Jaguar. He changes cars like I change underpants. Quickly. Oh, God. Why don't we borrow his car and give it away?

Well, I'll throw it to the audience. I would love to use Mike Hosking's car on my farm. I would take Mike Hosking's car to the drag races. G is with us. Yeah, Michael Lovett. Michael Lovett. We are down at the garage here at NZME. Super City Towing here.

The Jaguar is up. See you later, guys. There we go. It's happening. And we're taking it. We replaced his car with a red Labour card. Where is my car? This one's just as good.

You stole my car. It's my ass. Everyone's happy. We forgot to get the keys. Oh. You want me now to give you the key to my car. Fellow Newstalk ZB host Kate Hawksby, who's also married to Mike, responded with a cute animal filter on their faces and voices.

Well, that's fair. Yes. We have to stick by it? A little bit. Are you going to retaliate? I'm going to get them back. When you least expect it. I'm coming. He's saying? I'm going to get them back. When you least expect it. He's saying, I'm going to get them back when you least expect it.

It's quite hard to take him seriously as he's a chipmunk on the internet. He sounds so cute, doesn't he? He does sound adorable. Yeah. Maybe Mike Hosking, more people would like Mike Hosking if he was a chipmunk the whole time. So cute. But in his defence, he gave us the keys.

He did. He has been so, so compatible with this whole project. Only because he's got a backup car. He's already driving a new fancy European car. So I don't know how long we've got his car for, but we're going to enjoy it while it's here. And we decided we wanted to get it sign written today. And we phoned a sign writing place before the show

and they could do it. We have a car. We need sign written. And what are you wanting on that car? We're wanting win Mike Hosking's car. Thanks to Jono and Ben. Maybe live like Mike. We quite like that phrase, you know, like win this car.

Yeah, absolutely. We can do that for you. So the car's getting sign written. Yeah, Colourworks today. The team at Colourworks are going to put signs all over the car. I'm sure he'll love that. Next week, you guys can drive it. Do whatever you want with it.

But for this weekend, you're handing it over to me, Ben. I'm sure he'd love that. Next week, you guys can drive it, do whatever you want with it. But for this weekend, you're handing it over to me, Ben. I'm quite nervous. I just don't want to scratch it or anything. I'm more scared about looking after this car than I am my kids. If the kids get a scratch, that heals. Yeah.

If the car gets a scratch, that's $1,500. This is an expensive car, right? Yeah, but we discovered something on the internet yesterday that there's an event, well-timed event, on Sunday. This weekend? This weekend.

The Medi Medi Dragway Racing. Oh, really? We take the Jag. Oh, my goodness. We take the Jag to the drags. Jag goes to the drag. That is amazing. And so yesterday...

I mean, it's fully electric, right? It's fully electric. I mean, it may not go as well as the other cars, but, I mean, it'll look amazing and it'll be fast. It just won't get the smoke and the, you know, the environmental damage that the other cars do. That's the best part of the drags, is it's destroying the environment.

Yeah, it's doing great things for the environment, this car. Well, we phoned when you went home yesterday, just called the lady who organises the Miri Miri Drags. Hello, Nisa speaking. Hello, Nisa. How are you? I'm good. Is this Nisa who runs the Merry Merry Drags?

Yes, it is. Listen, you've got an event on Sunday? Yes, got a little Winter Drag Wars meet on Sunday. Is it too late to enter a car? No, you can enter right up until the day. Oh, this is great. This is great because I don't know if you're aware, Nisa, we kidnapped Mike Hosking's fancy

Jaguar. Wow. You've acquired a Jaguar. We've acquired a Jaguar and we'd love to take it down the quarter mile. It won't be the first Jaguar. It's not the first Jaguar. No. But I can guarantee this, it'll be the most pretentious I guarantee

you that, Nisa. Every time I've seen the drags or been to the drags, I always get the pressure to do a burnout at the start line. Yes. Is that a thing? It still is. Oh, no. See, I'm going to be no good at that, Nisa.

Does Mike know you have the car? Yeah, he knows. He knows. Okay. Does he know what we're doing with it? That's open to interpretation. You leave Mike to us. We'll worry about Mike. He knows. Okay. Does he know what we're doing with it, mate? That's open to interpretation. You leave Mike to us. We'll worry about Mike.

All right. See you Sunday. See you as Nisa. Wow. For Midi Midi Drags. So we're taking it to the drag. Pour out your glass of Cab Sav and crack open your can of Woody. The Jag is going to the drags to the heart of Bougainville.

Surrounded by flat-peaked Monster Energy caps. Skull T-shirts with offensive sayings on them. Oh, they are Mike's people there at the drags, I imagine. They are Mike's people. And he wanted the car to go to the people. He did. We're taking the car to the people. Oh, he will love it.

He will love it. It's going to the drags. And then on Monday, if it's still in one piece, you guys can borrow it, okay? Start your day the wrong way. It's Jono and Ben on my heads. Scrolling through your feed. Oh, I love this part of the show where you look through your feed. Now, let's not be confused with us running our fingers through your mushy Weet-Bix or anything. We're talking about your social media feed. We need to clarify that bit. That's

right. Now, yesterday, National Party Auckland Central MP Nikki Kaye, she bowed out of Parliament after many years in Parliament. She's been there for a while, hasn't she? She seems like a bit of a battler. Yeah, and she dropped an F-bomb in the process. In 2016, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. And as I've said before, my world broke. I tried to resign, and the only reason

that I was able to become Minister of Education was that John Key, as I cried my eyes out, said, you're not f***ing going anywhere. Why'd you beep it Juliette? Of course. They didn't beep it on Parliament TV. Parliament TV is a far more respected medium. Those renegades on Parliament TV will leave anything on there but yeah it was a funny joke. Everyone around her was hilarious. I don't know who the MP was behind her but he was like he, he was quite shocked. Yeah, and he does that face and then he looked

at the person next to him and he's like, oh, Nicky, no wonder she's like a sort of a pompous sort of face, wasn't it? But a really cool story how Nicky K battled back

from that, you know, like it must have been so tough for her. And good on John Key for supporting her too. She was probably like, I just want to stop working to be honest,

but he's sworn and said I have to stay here so I feel obliged. So Nicky K, all the best with whatever you do next. Yeah, thank you for your service, Nicky. Thank you, appreciate that.

It feels like it's this checkout week in Parliament. It's the last week. I think it's the last week of them sitting before the election, so everyone's on the... Well, everyone's got to resign. Who's resigning gets their official... See you later, guys. It's like when you're packing up the chairs at school

during the last week and watching home and away videos that your teacher puts on. Yeah, well, they probably are watching videos, you're right. I don't want to watch this movie, I've watched this movie. Oh, well, who's going to agree on this? It'd be tough to get Parliament to agree on a movie, wouldn't it? And over in Australia, there's been some talk this week about Ellen DeGeneres, all over the news.

It's hard saying her surname, isn't it? Ellen DeGeneres. I always go DeGeneres. DeGeneres, yeah. DeGeneres, yeah. DeGeneres, yeah. Ellen. She's known as Ellen. You know her from the talk show.

She comes out all smiling, all dancing, all fun. Oh, she's the happiest person ever. She's given presents to people. She's the loveliest lady on earth, but it's all starting to unravel now. The evil, dark side of Ellen DeGeneres is coming out. Well, it depends. I mean, it sounds like there's a lot of stuff

that's been created by the producers and the environment because there was a guy by the name of Neil Breen. He was the former boss of Channel 9 Breakfast Show. In 2013, Ellen came on when she was in Australia on a promotional tour, and this is how he described the producers told them to act around Ellen just before she was about to come into the room.

The producers called us aside and said, okay, this is how it's going to work here this morning. Neil, no one's to talk to Ellen. You don't talk to her. You don't approach her. You don't look at her. She'll come in. She'll sit down.

She'll talk to Richard. Then Ellen will leave. I found the whole thing bizarre. Anyway, I've got to tell you, I'm not blaming Ellen because I didn't get to talk to her because I wasn't allowed to. So I don't know whether she's a nice person or not. I wouldn't have a clue. I love the don't look at them in the eyes one.

Where do you look at them? To show focus on their ears? Chin? Why is it so disrespectful to look someone in the eye? It's so hard to know. I mean, well, what is actually going on? Yeah, whether that is to say the producers have created this environment, or Alan's created it.

I mean, I don't know. I've had interviews in the past with celebrities doing it, and the people behind the scenes were like, you can't talk about this, you can't do this. And you're like, okay, fine. And then the people, they're the first things they'll mention. You're like, well, hang on, am I allowed to talk about this? Because they're talking about it.

Oh, you had a thing with someone's hairpiece. Yeah, yeah. Don't mention his hairpiece. The first thing they were like, you need this. And you're like. And then he brought up the hairpiece. Yeah, so it's a very interesting situation. Yeah, but it trickles down, doesn't it?

It trickles down from the top of the pyramid. So I would assume Alan probably has those tendencies. The producers below her are probably so petrified of upsetting her that they then push it down to everyone else beneath them. So Alan, yes, probably doesn't know any of this is going on. No. But has probably created that environment you would assume.

Because why else would these people be running around going here's the guidelines and rules of how you should act and behave around Alan. I mean it's the same guidelines and rules that I like to abide by and thank you Juliet for enforcing those in the office no one looks me in the eyes. No worries, it's my pleasure. No one talks about my hairpiece.

And that is Scrolling Through Your Feed this morning. Like starting your day without your morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben on my heads. Friday morning too. It's always a good feeling. It is a great feeling. We must give a shout out, Ben. You know how much I love giving shout outs,

but I'm not going to obnoxiously shout this one out. He was taking his headphones off in preparation. I'm just going to deliver this at a normal broadcasting tone. Vishal, who's listening in his Uber. Katie from work caught an Uber this morning. Vishal's listening and he tunes in every day. And I apologise to all of Vishal's passengers who have to endure this broadcast.

I hope that doesn't reflect your star rating, you know, on the Uber, the fact that you've got us on there. But we really do appreciate it. You have a great day. If you're in Vish Charles' Uber right now, Give him five stars. Give him five stars,

but our sincerest apologies. Please don't tarnish for Charles with what we're doing right now. No, that's right. He's done nothing wrong. I'm glad we don't have a star rating that people give for us. Charles is collateral damage

for the subpar radio show. Anyway, we like to do end of the show on a good note. Not this negative downward spiral we're heading into now, Ben. Pull ourselves out of this rut. Why is today going to be a good day? Yeah, now, I'll tell you why it's going to be a good day for you, Benjamin Boyce. Yeah.

Because you're heading to Rotorua. I am. With your family. Those fingers are going to stimulate the local economy. He's going to be stimulating up a storm. He's going to get the peak stimulus. Yeah, I'm going to. I am. Well, we've been working for the last nine or ten weekends,

four weekends non-stop. So our first weekend, we haven't got any work. So I'm really looking forward to going away and reintroducing myself to my family. Go, hey, I'm Ben, I'm your dad. And stimulating the economy. And I'm going to go and stimulate the economy at the pub. Straight after the show.

Still stimulating the economy. Still at 9.30. Still a Kiwi hero. Still a Kiwi hero. And I'll be drunk and belligerent by 11am, abusing people on the pub. Straight ask the show. Still stimulating the economy. Still at 9.30. Still a Kiwi hero. Still a Kiwi hero. And he'll be drunk and belligerent by 11am, abusing people on the street. You do that for New Zealand, right? I've been stimulating the economy. You know nothing.

And you're ready to walk out. I can keep stimulating this economy. Yeah, I've been working since four. It's my five o'clock. Just a naked man wandering around town. So that's going to be me doing my part. Yeah, you call us 0800. That hits the phone number.

Why is it going to be a good day slash weekend for you? It can be as big or as little as you want. We don't judge. It's not our job to sit here and judge. It's our job here to say some words that kind of make sense and do three hours of OK radio. National Party MP Nikki Cote. It's going to be a good day for her, I'm sure,

because it's her last day in Parliament. Distinguished Korea has ended today. She went out yesterday in Parliament with a bit of an F-bomb during her speech. In 2016, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. And as I've said before, my world broke. I tried to resign and the only reason that I was

able to become Minister of Education was that John Key, as I cried my eyes out, said, you're not f***ing going anywhere. Good laughing. There's a great look from the guy behind, Nicky K. We've put it on our Hits Breakfast Instagram page. A little bit of pee came out with that guy, didn't he? I love how Parliament TV didn't censor it, but the Hits did.

So there we go. Let's go to the phones. Catherine, how's New Plymouth on a Friday morning, matey? Oh, yeah. Catherine? Not bad. Kath? Oh, Kath's gone. Oh, no.

Oh, we lost Kath. You know what's even more bleak is Kath was the only person who called up. Now we're sitting in this hole. Oh, no, someone else is going, oh, they're calling Kath back in an act of desperation. Oh, 800, the hits was. It's going to be a good day. But you said you're the hit.

We don't always come to you. Oh, well, that's a good idea. You got anything planned this weekend? She's like, now you care. Now you care it's going to be a good day. We've gone into a hole. You've gone up until Kath comes back on the phone. All right, great.

My flatmates and I were doing a bit of a potluck dinner tonight. And it's all going to be an absolute mess in the kitchen while we're all scrambling to make a bunch of different dishes. You always end up with such an interesting cuisine, don't you, at a potluck? It's not like a buffet. You end up with all the foods, the United Nations of food on your plate at a potluck,

don't you? Oh, for sure. For sure. Megan's on 0800 The Hits. Why is it going to be a good day for you, Megan? Hi. Why is it going to be a good one for you, Meg? I've got my nearly nine-year-old in the car.

He's got a day off for his birthday. It's on Monday. Oh, yeah. Hello, nearly nine-year-old. How are you? Good. Every day counts when you're that age, eh? Yeah.

Nearly nine. Nearly nine. Eight and three quarters. You get older and you start forgetting about those days. But happy birthday for Monday. Thank you. Good on you, mate. What are you going to do today, Megan?

We're making a Death Star birthday cake. Oh, a Death Star birthday cake. Awesome. That's better than another themed birthday cake. It's the best birthday cake ever. We're going to send you a double pass to Reading Cinemas, all right? Oh, awesome. Thank you.

And guess who comes back? Well, well, well, Catherine. What do you want to say, Catherine? Why is it going to be a a double pass to Reading Cinemas, all right? Oh, awesome. Thank you. And guess who comes back? Well, well, well, Catherine. What do you want to say, Catherine? Why is it going to be a good day? Make it quick. Every Friday, I wash cars at Toi Uru with my mum and new plumber. Oh, well, you enjoy washing those cars, and thank you for saving our baking, Catherine. Double pass to the movies.

See you as well. Thank you, guys. Oh, my God. Have a great weekend. Catch you Monday for sex. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from sex on the hits and via the iHeartRadio app.