Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - March 19 - WE PRANKED BEN GOOOOOD!

Episode Date: March 18, 2021

Kia Ora!! Today we executed a prank on Ben that the team had been working on behind the scenes for the last week. Just before our show started at 6am this morning, all of us individually (and subtly) left the studio, leaving Ben in there all by himself, with no idea how to run the radio desk. When the show was meant to go live, Ben was flustered and alone, trying to figure out what to do. It was a shambles and hilarious! We also played a piece of audio of Ben's daughter Sienna, who voices a radio ad, and she's only 11. So much more successful than her dad. So we asked you guys if your kids are more successful than you (opportunity to #humblebrag). Finally, we were joined by the boys from Kiwi band Drax Project who have a brand new song out!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome to the podcast on a Friday. Can you just shush your sweet little lips?

What? We haven't time stamped it. Oh, Friday the 19th of March. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, there you go. Great, there you go. Friday the 19th of March will Yeah, that's right. Yeah, there you go. Great, there you go. Friday the 19th of March will be remembered as a day

that the whole team pranked me. First thing in the mornings. I'm going to put it in my calendar as an annual reminder. I remember that in a year's time when you pranked me. So what happens before the show, we're all kind of,

we're kind of busy working away on stuff that we need to prepare for the show. So Gino normally goes into another room, edits some stuff. I'm looking at sort of topical news stories Juliet's uh you know compiling spy producer Humphrey's going through everyone's kind of busy and you kind of I didn't notice that one by one

you guys have been leaving me and left me alone in the area until news was playing and Juliet was like uh-oh news is playing no one's around I'll go find them and then I'm sitting here by myself with like 20 seconds to go going oh oh, everybody's leaving a bit late. And then, no, you guys left me. That was the prank and I don't really know how to operate. That desk around there is none of my business. It's none of your business. You just watch Juliet pushing buttons and you're like, well, that's her lane.

I'll stay in mine. Yeah. And you know how to turn the microphone on, I think. Yeah, I came around there and I thought I knew how to kick off the next song and everything. But what I didn't realise is you guys were controlling the studio desk in another room. So every time I'd try and start something, you'd stop it. Then you'd play stuff and you'd stop it. And it was actually really funny.

Right now, I didn't push a button, but it's playing. No, it's not. The mouse has been controlled by someone. This is... here you go. It's the, it's, I can't move the mouse on the desk. Oh, I love that adorable, goofy laugh. It was funny because, you know, you can see the little mouse arrow, and I'm trying to drag it across the screen,

and then obviously it's not moving, and it's all, I'm having a fight. And I guess that was you guys in the other room just fighting with the mouse. You can hear that in its entirety today. I like asking you a pop star question for my quiz. This has actually been really, really good for us. I like changing up the questions a little bit where I think they're too easy. So you'll know the answer to this one, okay, from your rich history of love of Bogan music.

Which heavy metal group released Master of Puppets? Metallica. Yes, okay, from your rich history of love of Bogan music. Yeah. Which heavy metal group released Master of Puppets? Metallica. Yes, yes, right. But what year, this is the thing, this is not the question, but this is my additional question.

What year was Master of Puppets? That's a good question. It's earlier than I thought it was, but that's, I'm not au fait with. I thought it was 88 or 89. 86. 86? Master of Puppets, 86. But that's Yeah I'm not I'm not au fait with I thought it was 88 or 89 86 86 Master of Puppets

86 Jeez That's an old album Yeah That's it That's yeah Master of Puppets 1986

So there you go That's your pop star question For today You know The actual question In this pop star game That I was given was Which heavy metal group

Released Master of Puppets In 1986 So you would have got The answer correct 86 But I just thought It would be interesting to see if you knew the year. Four years old in 1986. It was a lot earlier than

I thought that album would have been but much like the radio desk here it's none of my business as well Two dads just trying to fill some air time. Some might say it's pointless but the main thing is it fills in some air time for us. That is the main thing. Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits.

New Zealand's breakfast. This is Jono and Ben on the hits. Is that? Oh, hello. It's the hits. Jono and Ben. Well, it's just Ben at the moment. Just got six o'clock.

Oh, that's quite loud. How do I turn that down? Yeah, well, look, at the moment, I'm the only one in the studio because I don't know why. I don't know where anyone is. Oh, that's still quite loud. But anyway, it's going to be a big show. If anyone comes along to join me, it's really blaring quite loud.

I don't know what they are. Oh, there you go. It's really blaring quite loud. I don't know what they are. Oh, there you go. That's better. Yeah, welcome along to the hits. Jono and Ben with you on a Friday morning. Oh. Oh. Oh, it's back.

It's back. It's going to be a big show. Just Ben at the moment for some reason. It's back. It's going to be a big show. Just Ben at the moment for some reason. It's just I don't know if I'm getting pranked right now or if it's just the way it is. If this is the way you find out you're doing the show by yourself. Either way, it's going to be a big show. We've got five words

for $5,000. That's happening at 7.45 this morning. That's right now. I didn't push a button, but it's playing. Right now, it's pink. Leap... No, it's not.

Right now, it's just back to the music bed that we had before. But this is going to be a big show. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Next. Next, next, next, next, next, next. There we go. Oh, the mouse is not working.

Um, yeah, Jack's Project joining us just after 7.30 this morning. They've got a big... The mouse has been controlled by someone. This is... Oh, sh... There you go. It's the...

I can't move the mouse on the desk. This is all problems that no one's understanding what this is, but right now there's a computer system in front of me and I can't do anything about it right now. It's like I'm fighting for the mouse. Anyway, it's pink. Leave me alone. Here we go.

We're back. No, we're not back. It's Ben just by himself floundering right now, stuck in the radio studio. There we go. Pink on the way for you right now. It is... What is going on?

What is... There's no one here. Normally, Producer Behubz, Juliet, Producer will be here. Jono will be here. They have all left me in the studio right now. I'm guessing this was planned. And I really should take more notice of the desk

at what Producer Julian is pushing. There you go. We got a pic. Hey. Oh. I don't know if anyone's listening right now or if anyone's still hanging with us over this. But I do really appreciate if you are.

I feel like I'm doing Newstalk ZB right now, just kind of songs, but just the background to me. And we'll just keep going. How long do you want me to keep going for? Here we are! Oh, everyone's here. Welcome to a very shambolic five minutes of radio. Ben, we have been hiding in the boardroom. We've been watching you on monitors, flounder.

Millennial Max has been stopping the music. How was the thing? Was someone controlling the mouse? Millennial Max is doing it from the other end. I'm going to do something and the mouse wouldn't work. It's like I was battling for the mouse. I was like, I'll just push this button. I can't get over there.

I was like, I could listen to this for an hour. A guy just floundering in the studio Experts in semi-accurate half-remembered information Vaguely no information but maybe not correct Jono and Ben

New Zealand's breakfast on the hits Now if you just missed it the guys you guys you played a prank on me Yeah Ben doesn't know how to work

the computer system so we all one by one before six o'clock sort of left the studio and went to the boardroom where we had a vision of you in the studio and we could control the on-air computer. And then we just left you to start the show.

I was so proud of myself. Firstly, I was flustered, obviously, because I didn't know where everyone was, and I was trying to ring Jono, and I was trying to run out, and then I was like, okay, I've got to go on air. You turned the mic on. I turned the mic on and I was like, here we go, I'm away. And then everything kept playing and then stopping and then playing and stopping.

You guys were controlling the system. Every time I go, oh, no, I need to hit this one, it wouldn't play. Now, Emily's with us from Taranaki. She heard the whole shambles. Emily, welcome. Morning, morning. Your thoughts?

Oh, at first I thought my radio was glitching, and then I thought, hang on, Ben's freaking out a little bit here This is too funny Yeah, I got a text from a mate of ours, John And he was like, your finest work, mate Your finest work Hey, good on you, Emily

Have a wonderful weekend You too Too early for pranking Oh, I know, I wasn't expecting that at all I'm just quietly looking at your news and stuff And preparing the show Getting mentally in the zone Yeah, catch them unawares Catch them off guard I didn't even that at all. I'm just quietly looking at your news and stuff and preparing the show, getting mentally in the zone. Yeah, catch them unawares, catch them off guard.

Yeah, I didn't even know you guys had gone. And thanks to Anthony too, doing the camera work, he came in very early. So that was fun. We'll put that up. What time did you guys start that? Oh, listen, this has been in the works for the last five days. But yeah, everyone was at work.

I mean, yeah, jeez. I know. After you've been pranked, you kind of go, how did all this go on behind my back? Yeah. What other stuff are you doing behind my back? From stealing Mike Hosking's car to stealing the hearts of New Zealand.

Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. Actual hearts being not bestowed. Earlier this morning, we were talking about Blue Ivy winning a Grammy, which is pretty awesome. Yeah, Beyonce's daughter. Beyonce's daughter, yeah. She's nine years old and she won a Grammy for a music video that she featured in of Beyonce's.

Is she the youngest ever Grammy winner? No, an eight-year-old girl has won one before. So not quite the youngest, but still pretty young. I mean, Beyonce, we talked earlier, has got 30-odd Grammys or something. 28, almost. She's the only thing I won at age nine was the Player of the Day trophy of rugby. But they kind of felt obliged to just hand that round the team. And even at nine too

I remember one time I got it and I had a shocking gaffe. Why am I getting it? It was just the rotation. It was the rotation. You got a can of coke and the player of the day trophy. I don't deserve this but I'll take it. I'll take it. Make sure you bring it back next week with the oranges.

We're thinking at age nine, Blue Ivy is probably more successful than her parents. At age nine. I mean, obviously they've gone on to have amazing careers. Oh, if you wanted to do a line graph showing the trends of their... They hadn't wanted to grab me by the time they were nine, had they, your fiance or Jay-Z?

So we're thinking this morning on 0800 The Hits. How is your kid, your daughter, your son, is more successful than you? Like, why are they better than you? Can I throw you under the hits. How is your kid, your daughter, your son, is more successful than you? Like, why are they better than you? Can I throw you under the bus here? Sienna, your daughter, what people might not know, she's the same talent agent. She's got the same talent agent as you and me.

Yeah, she is. She's hit the big leagues. Yeah, yeah. We're not playing the big leagues. No, no. But she gets more gigs through the talent agency than ben and both ben and me combined to be fair yeah i can't remember the last time we got a gig there we don't we don't i get texts all the time going hey audition i'm like yes for sienna oh yeah yes you know it happens all the

time yeah she's been in a couple of ads been on some billboards been on there's a radio ad i think we're playing at the moment with her voice. From home to Mr O'Leary's wicked science class. The one where he raps rubber bands That's her right now, you know.

And so I get these things going, can I do a voice job? Yeah, that's Sienna, yeah, I could take her to a voice job,

yeah. I mean, the silver lining is at least someone with the surname Boyce is making it in showbiz. There was a period for a while there

when it was all on you. Yeah, Sienna was on a TV ad and I hadn't had, we hadn't had a TV show for a long time and she was like, you yeah Sienna was on a TV ad and I hadn't had we hadn't had a TV show for a long time and she was like yeah I'm on TV

more than dad and I'm like alright mate for sense it was a good gag though I appreciated that do you still get a do you get a cut

due to the fact that you had somewhat of a hand in creating her a managerial role yeah because every time he's like

oh I've got to take her to another audition and sit with the other dance moms you sit in the waiting room don't you with the dance moms and sometimes

every now and again I go in for the audition and people like will kind of go what's he here for what's he here for there's no audition for it you know

does it get competitive to your side eye the other kids and try and you know knock them over and stuff oh no I just sort of sit there and sort of have a lovely conversation with other people.

You would love the light banter. I would. That's what I know about you. I enjoy the light banter. So she's already way more successful than me, so we want to know this morning, why is your child more successful than you? What are they doing already that you weren't doing at that age? Well, already my kids can say the alphabet, and I still haven't known it.

So they're beating me hands down. 0800, that's the number 4487 if you want to text. Parents, this is your chance to brag about your kids. We'll start with Sarah and Henderson. Welcome. How's the Wild West this morning Sarah? Oh, it's good, thanks. Just on my way to work.

We were out there last night wrestling in some warehouse next to a panel beaters. Yeah, we were. Oh, okay. No follow-up questions. That's the truth of what we were doing, but that's not explaining any more than that. Why's your kid more successful than you? Well, Michaela, she won the Secret Sound two years ago,

but she did diploma in history when she was 18, and then she went to the States and lived there for a year. And now she's just set up her own cake business in the UK because she worked for Topdeck for two years and she can't get home. So, yeah, she's not 25 yet, but she's... She's got her own cake business in the UK, and she won the Secret Sound. The Secret Sound.

Was that a 50 grand, baby? She won 30,000. 30,000? Paid off her student debt and she's been travelling the world. Wow. Yeah, she's just amazing. But yeah, she's just set up her business

inside Matt's mouth. Well, this has been a wonderful advert for ZM. It's very hard to win that thing. Don't listen. Don't listen. You're not going to win. You've more chance of winning five words than I show, that's for sure.

Look after yourself, Sarah. You have a great weekend. Thanks, you too. Appreciate that. Some texts coming through. My son's a 12-year-old merchant banker. Far more successful than me. I feel like you made that one up. I'm nine years old. I have

an extensive property portfolio. These are legitimate texts. Kelly, you're on. Welcome. We'll go to Kelly in Greymouth. How are you, Kel? Thank you. You've got a successful kid Kelly in Greymouth. How are you, Kel? Thank you. You've got a successful kid, more successful than you. What are they doing?

Yep, my son's 19, and his first job from school earns way, way more than me. Don't you like it? Damn. Really puts us in our place, doesn't it? Do you have to borrow money off your son? Well, not quite, but it's a bit like that. He walks around like Richie Rich and can afford everything, and I'm paying all the bills.

Yeah. That's the thing. You're like, you're earning more than me, but I'm still paying the bills. Yeah. That's right. Does he just wander around town going, I could buy that.

I could buy that. See that? I could buy that. Name something. I could probably buy it. That's awesome, Kelly. Congratulations. You must be proud. Yeah, I could buy that. Name something I could probably buy. That's awesome, Kelly. I love it. Congratulations. You must be proud.

Yeah, I am mostly proud. Mostly proud and 10% jealous. That's so awesome. Samantha's on from Christchurch. How are you, Sam? Hey, good, guys. How are you? Yeah, good.

Lovely to have you on. Your kids are more successful than you? Unfortunately. Yeah, my five-year-old, she just started karate less than two months ago and she's already got her yellow belt. She's received best student of the week four times already and they've spoken to us about putting her into tournament training because she's a quote-unquote natural.

Wow, you've got a karate champion on. That's awesome. Apparently. So she can not only kick your ass. You start to get a little bit scared of your own daughter. You're like, oh, yeah, no, I'll clean your room for you. That's fine. Honestly, the moment those tantrums start, it's like, yeah, no, you can stay over there.

You're quite scared of you. Oh, well, she could make the Olympics. Yeah, yeah, she could. We'll see how we go. Put all your money in, put all your eggs in that basket and ride that all the way home, okay? That's so awesome. I plan to.

Good on you, Samantha. Should we take one more? Got time for one more? Yeah, we'll go to Cajun, Auckland. Why is your kid more successful than you, Kate? My daughter is 15 and she's still in school. When did you drop out of school? I was 14.

She's done one year better. Yeah, well done. The success story of the whanau. That's so good. Appreciate your call, Kate. Ben and Jono call this show Jono and Ben. Breakfast on the Heads. The Heads.

We love catching up with these talented humans. The boys from Drax Project with us in the studio. You all know them from so many smash hits. This hit, Woke Up Late, was a monster. And they've got a new single out today. We're going to hear more about it very shortly. But great to see you guys. Always good to hang out.

Hello. Likewise, fellas. It's always good to catch up. We do it every sort of six months or so. We don't do it enough. I feel like we've got a nice, relaxed friendship now, don't we? You're going friendship. I'd love to say friendship. I mean, we're friends a nice relaxed friendship now don't we are you going friendship I'd love to say friendship

I think we're friends it's kind of that awkward stage where it's like we feel like we're friends but do you no we do yeah it's good

we're at the friend level that's great I love it Ben when Sean Walton you went in for a handshake and you're like oh no don't I get a hug he said don't I get a hug oh yeah because you kind of

I went in for we did the hug though yeah we did the hug we doubled back on the hug and it was good it was good it It needed to happen. Yeah, exactly. It was good.

It was a nice moment. Now, you guys have got a new single. It's out today. It's called... It was good. It was a nice moment. It was good. We had a moment.

We had a moment. We'll talk about it. It was a moment. We shared a moment. Over It, the new single out today. Now, we haven't heard this. We're about to listen to it for the first time. Awesome.

In front of you guys. What was it like when people listened to your music, though? Because I know whenever we do anything on TV or when we did, watching it with other people was, oh, I just couldn't do it. I don't know. You know, just watching their eyes. Yeah. Watching their body.

If you're, like, at your friend's house and they put it on, they're like, hey, hey, hey. It's a little bit funny. Yeah, what is it like? Hey, hey, hey. It's a little bit funny yeah what is it like do your friends play like if you guys are hanging out would they play drax project uh you know at a barbecue when you're with them mom does your mom that's cute yeah that's so adorable um yeah mom mom yeah it's definitely more like parents and... I say adults. We're adults now. Actually, my daughter, Indy,

I don't know if you guys... Is there a pair of headphones plugged in that you can have a quick listen to? Okay. I went and talked to her yesterday and this is an honest conversation, even though I recorded it for radio. Have a listen to this. This is my daughter, nine-year-old Indy.

Indy, what's your favourite songs? Oh, she wrote Firefly and Chandelier. Oh! That's massive. 660. Is that Sia, Chandelier? Yeah. And then it carried on.

I was like, Indie, what's your favourite songs? All She Wrote, Firefly and Chandelier. All She Wrote, Firefly and Chandelier. Well, guess who we have in the radio studio tomorrow? Sia? Please be Sia. We read on to say, she's pretty excited about that.

I really read it down. But I liked how that was the first one. Oh, you got Sia. She's quarantined for two weeks. That's crazy. Next time, Sia will wear the wig. Hey, now, Ben was telling me

before you guys came in that there was a really interesting back story to Woke Up Late and how the song actually became to be written and recorded we've interviewed you guys

a few times but didn't realise that a lost wallet was to do with was it you Ben that you lost a wallet I just left it at home bus card

no I had my wallet my bus card was at home working on I don't even remember we were writing some song it was like midnight and I was just grumpy I'd had enough wanted Sean to leave and he left No, I had my wallet, my bus card was at home. Working on, I don't even remember what, we were writing some song. It was like midnight and I was just grumpy. I'd had enough, wanted Sian to leave.

And he left to catch the bus home and then comes back like 20 minutes later and he's just like, I don't have my wallet. My bus card didn't let me on. You didn't have your hop card. Yeah, or snapper. We call them snapper. Oh, snapper card, okay. And then you guys started playing some music. Yeah, I went and made a cup of tea and then came back and Shana came up with the guitar line.

It's a work-up, mate. It's pretty cool. And you got that bus driver to thank. Yeah. A salty bus driver. That's so true. His lack of empathy really pulled through. And the other thing that I found interesting,

Ed Sheeran took you guys out for dinner, did he? You had dinner with Ed Sheeran? Yeah. He took everyone who was on the show out for dinner. So you opened for him three times. He did check us out afterwards for dinner and it was pretty surreal.

We were the first ones there. When he told us where it was and when, we rocked up like half an hour earlier waiting for him to rock. Put this on Sheeran's bill. Did he pay for it

or did you go split us five ways, guys? He did pay for it. We went in and we're just like. He sold 120,000 tickets. He better be paying for it. Did he give you like, you it. Did he seriously talk about music and give you guys some advice?

I mean, he must be such a knowledgeable person to talk to. He was ridiculously nice. We had like a 20-minute chat with him and he was just brutally honest. He was just giving us advice. Business advice. Business advice.

Music advice. Things that he had done that he regrets doing. He's like, oh, if you guys come into this scenario, just bear this in mind. He was the nicest done that he like regrets doing. He's like, oh, if you guys come into this scenario, like, just like bear this in mind. He was the nicest guy. Genuinely, yeah.

What about, did you go, did you order the top steak meal? Yeah. What was it? I think I had the nachos. Oh, yeah,

good option. We're giving away what kind of restaurant it was. But yeah, I had the burritos. Let's debut the song. Let's get it on. It's called Over It.

Tell us a little bit about it. We wrote it in 2019 actually. Oh wow. It's a couple years old. Yeah. It was one of the last songs that we wrote in LA. We wrote it in like five hours. Can I just say, how deep does your voice sound right now?

Oh this microphone. It's like you've gone through puberty three times. Yeah. And after that we came back to New Zealand. It's got a voice and a face for radio you sound like we're on national radio

or something this is amazing and welcome back it's called Over It this is Drax Project this is new we're going to listen to it and they're going to watch us

dead in the eyes while we listen to it for the first time and we'll come back with a raw honest review I'm excited. Taking as you please I'm just here wondering Why would you wanna pick it up From my last goodbye Did you forget the words

That she said last time I'm struggling with my pride Cause you're on my mind Pretty much all the time Should I let this slide If you're over Why'd you let me take you home If you're over Then why why'd you let me take you home? If you're over it, then why'd you stay until the morning?

Crossing all the lines you made, split me as you were not really over it You're not helping me get over it Oh, you want me, you want me not Seein' some of me like you're just turnin' it on and off Caught me loose instead of leavin' me in the dark It's gettin' old, make up your mind Yes or no, black and white Yeah, cause if you're over it Why'd you let them take you home?

If you're over it You might just stay on till the morning Crossing all the lines you made It's clear to me that you're not really over it You're not helping me get over You, you, you, you You, you, you, you You, you, you, you

You, you, you, you What the fuck? I can't open it in my head I can't let you take it Always change your mind when you left the room I just don't want you Said I wasn't the right one to get to know ya We're not getting closer

Tell me you're fine You're not helping me get over Outro Music I'm not helping me get over Gee, that's good. That's so cool. Brand new from Drax Project. It's called Over It. Just out today, guys. It's awesome.

Thanks so much. Thanks for playing it. Now, you were looking at us while we were listening. What did you say? How were our reactions? Yeah, we had pretty good reactions. There was nothing negative. No negative body language.

Slightly reserved. It was really, really good. Here's a little bit of advice. I think if you guys stick with it, you're going to go places. I reckon you'll make it. Your potential, kid. Well, hopefully we get a chance to see you guys. I saw you guys up in Waitangi before 6.60. It was so impressive. You guys were awesome

live and it was such an amazing event to see you guys do your thing. I mean, yeah. So hopefully a chance for more New Zealanders over the next little while to maybe see you guys. Absolutely. Always fun hanging out with you boys. Thank you very much. Anytime, fellas.

Keep safe. You're welcome back here anytime. You can hug anytime and have another moment. Here we go. Have another moment. That'd be great. Hug, sanitise, and scan in. That's right.

That's all we need to say. What more Jono and Ben you can catch up with the boys anytime just search Jono and Ben on Instagram now a friend of mine

Hamish he was like he wanted he wanted us to put something to our listeners here at the hits he's like here's some content

for your radio show and you told me what it was and I was like that's splendid content for the radio broadcast. Now, he reckons he might have New Zealand's shortest commute. So he lives in an apartment. And his work is very close to where he lives, an apartment.

And he says he's worked it out. It takes him 200 steps from when he leaves his door to when he sits down at his office. Now, he works in a music store, doesn't he? Yeah, he does. So he reckons there's 200 steps from the time he leaves until to when he sits down at his office. Now he works in a music store, doesn't he? Yeah, he does. So he workings 200 steps from the time he leaves until the time he's come out. You know you live really close to your place of work when you're counting the steps, don't you?

Has he ever like Ubered? Has he taken one of those e-scooters to work before? I don't think he would. I mean, it's so close. I mean, it's pretty much, I mean, 200 steps can't be that far away from, you know, it's within I mean, 100 metres probably. And he wanted us to throw out there, does anyone have a shorter commute to work? He wants to know if he's got New Zealand's shortest commute.

Because he was saying that he thought he did have it. And I was like, well, you might have. You might have. I mean, that's a pretty impressive commute, you know, for its short distance, short amount of distance. So we want to know, are we under the hits of 4487 on the text, have you got New Zealand's shortest commute? And do you sometimes turn up late to work? Because I think

because we know people who live right next door to the school and you know they're like many days the kids are turning up late and it's all relative isn't it to your location? You work within your time frame. Both of us actually come to think of it you spent some of your childhood living on Air Force Base when your dad was working there

and I lived at a school when my dad was head master so in a way that was a pretty short commute for our dads to kind of get to work. Yeah. So did your dad live on the school property? It was like the property. Yeah. So it was in there. You got a bougie house, did you?

The house came with the principal job. They had to give it back in, you know, when it was all over. It must have been a great place to play in the holidays, the school. Oh, yeah. I had the right of the school, mate. You know, if you want to ride bikes over judder bars, the school. Oh yeah, I had the run of the school, mate. If you want to ride bikes over Jatabars by yourself, if you want to get into the drama department and do plays,

did no one. Oh, jeez. Why didn't you invite friends then? It doesn't mean you didn't have to have friends. You could still have had friends. No one wanted to hang out with me, mate. I was putting on wonderful performances to no one on the stage. You know this place you spend all year at, do you want to spend more time in it during the holidays with me? No.

No, thanks. I want to go to Lollipops. Playland. So 0800 The Hits, we're going to chuck it out there. Have you got New Zealand's shortest commute? Can you beat 200 steps? It's pretty short. It is very short. A lot of people live next door, I imagine, to work locations?

Let's say it's 100 metres away from where my friend Hamish lives. So let's say, oh, 100, that's 4487. Can you be 100 metres? I know this is kind of an aside story, but a friend of ours lived behind a Hell Pizza and ordered delivery pizza one time to their house. Delivery?

Delivery pizza. Lazy! It was out of pure laziness. But that's what you do. They're offering a service, so take him up on it. Wow. Literally the guy, I think he said it was comical because he thought he was going somewhere far and then he went on his moped, drove down the road a bit

and then realised, oh no, it's exactly there, and then drove up the driveway. You'd be like, surely this is not the place. Oh, 100 of those, 4487, New Zealand's shortest commute. Can you beat Hamish next with 200 steps? Let's go to Laura. You're on, Morena. Morena.

How are you? I'm good, thank you. Hey, Laura, have you got New Zealand's shortest commute? Well, I used to. I used to live right opposite my job, and I could see it from the bedroom window. I thought you still had it and you were in the car, like driving across the road.

No, still pretty short to drive to work, though. That's impressive. Would you ever turn up late? No, I wouldn't, but my son actually works from home and he's always late. Works from home, how does that work? But you'd probably leave stuff at home, too, like, for lunch-wise, you'd be like, oh, I'll just go home. You know, there'd be all those sorts of benefits.

Yeah, and also because I worked for a school back then when the law changed, our yard became the smoker's yard for the teachers. Oh, your front yard? Yeah, well, backyard, so nobody could see, obviously. Oh, yeah, do you know about all the teachers out the front huffing and puffing, do you? Yeah, no. I always used to love it when you figured out which teachers went off and smoked. They come out, always the stressed out ones,

don't they? We had a wonderful guy, we had an economics teacher, a South African guy, Mr Vento, and he would flare up to the point where he would just storm

out of the class and then come back in a cloud of smoke. I can imagine you would be, it'd be, oh jeez, you'd be a nightmare. Oh, I was a nightmare.

Thank you, Laura, have a great day Oh, I was a nightmare. Yeah. Thank you, Laura. Have a great day. You too. Thank you. All right, we'll go to Kate. We'll bring you on the radio, Kate. You got New Zealand's shortest commute?

Not me, but where I take my dog for Dobby Day Care. You actually know the owner, Kerry. He literally opens a door from his house and he's in the reception of the doggy daycare. That is a short commute for your dog and I'm sure your dog appreciates that. And it's good to know that we're about to you. Christ, yeah. Oh, there's someone in the South Island, Ben. Oh, because every time I talk about doggy daycare and taking my dog,

Jono's like, don't do it. The South Island, they're not going to like it. No, she goes three days a week. Oh, so does yours get a report card at the end of every year as well? No, not as that. And class photos, we get class photos and everything. It gets a little medal and it's like, what did he win the medal for? I know he didn't win the medal for everything.

That's the same medal you use for every dog's photo. He's not winning medal, maybe for barkiest dog or something like that. And the barkiest dog And the fluffiest dog Takes it out by default And the goofiest dog Maybe he's a multi-award winner Kate you go and have a great weekend

You too Alright and we'll end on Mitchell Welcome from the Waikato Mitchell How's the Tron this morning? Yeah good Shortest commute to work. I think we have a winner. You can beat 200 steps.

Yeah, well, I live about 30 steps away from my farm. Well, not my farm, but the farm I work on. 30 steps. It's a winner. It is a winner. Do you milk cows? Yeah, I'm milking them at the moment, actually. Yeah, we milked a cow the other week.

Yeah, we learnt about it. It's a lot more, they had a rotating Oh, jeez, the technology in dairy. A rotary. Yeah, it was pretty impressive. And each of the machine knows which cow is standing on it, at what time. They know all the cows separately. They also know the output

of all the milk, how the cow's feeling, if it's had a good day, a bad day. Yeah, it was pretty impressive. It's all automatic now. It's crazy. Although we took it back to the old school, wrapped our hands around

and uttered, didn't we? And then Ben was spraying it in my face, which was, it was, yeah. I don't know quite how I felt like that. We filmed it for television.

I don't know. I don't know if it'll make the cut. Yeah. I was like, what's going on? What is happening here? I don't know. But there you go.

I'm going to send you out some hell pizza for your weekend, all right, my friend? Thank you. They're proud of New Zealand. Woo! Go New Zealand!

If only New Zealand was proud of them. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. That's 7.45 and you know what that means. Five words for 5K

on the hits. You're only five words away from a massive payday. It's our Game of Word Association. We tell you five words, you say the first of five words that pop into massive payday. It's our Game of Word Association. We tell you five words. You say the first five words that pop into your head if they match with ours. You win 5K.

We've given 5K away today. We've given away, Wednesday we gave 5K away, didn't we? Yeah. Yeah. Wednesday, Tuesday, Wednesday, something like that, one of those days. No, you said 5K, we're giving it away today. Oh, sorry. That's fine.

That's okay. Why am I pulling you up on that? No, you're right. I did say today. This week, sorry. You've let down Why am I pulling you up on that? No, you're right. I did say today. This week, sorry. You've let down the team of 5 million. I have. Your family are disappointed in you.

Yeah, I know. Most importantly, I am. No, it's a great competition. We are starting to give away so much cash. I heard Lotto. Lotto scrutineers are shaking their little Lotto balls in fear that we might overtake them as New Zealand's premier cash giveaway. Well, it could happen.

Today, a five grand on the line. It is today, right? Yeah. Heather, you're on from Christchurch. Morena. Hello, how are you?

We're doing well. Heather, what's on plans for the weekend? Oh, not too much planned yet, but hopefully I'll win five grand and then that will be changed.

All right. Well, just like Justin Timberlake in the year 2000, you need to get in sync with one of us. I do. Who are you sending into the soundproof booth? Ben this morning.

Ben. I notice once someone has a win, a lot of people in those subsequent days tend to put that person in the soundproof booth. He's making his way over to the booth right now. We've already given away five grand this week. Can we give away another 5K and also probably give away any chance of anyone on the show

having a pay rise this year today? Heather. Five words, all right? You've got to match them up with Ben Boyce's. Here is your first word. Feline. Cap. That's an obvious choice.

Globe. This is a tough one, globe. That is. Globe. First word that comes to your head when you hear globe. Ear. Oh, sorry. No, sorry. Globe. G-L-O when you hear globe. Ear. Oh, sorry. No, sorry.

Globe. G-L-O-B-E. Globe. Yeah, not lobe. Who's in the background playing with you? Oh, we always play it at work. Oh, that's all. Whereabouts are you working?

At a bakery. Oh, at a bakery. Hello, everyone at the bakery. What about? All right, they've got their fingers in pies. And globe. I'm going to go snow globe. Oh, good option.

Good option. The bakery agree? I think so. The third word, police. Police? Is that F-L? P-O-L-I-C-E. Say what?

Police, as in police team. Oh, police. Police. Tricky words. Tricky words here, though. I'm going to go cop. Cop? Oh, can I change that?

You can. Sorry. I'm going to go officer, police officer. Oh, that's smart. Is that what you would have gone to? Yeah, I think so. Run. Run is the fourth word.

What? And the fifth and final word to win you and the bakery $5,000. And appropriately, it is muffin. Muffin. You probably bake them on the daily. We do. Yeah. bake them on the daily? We do. I heard blueberry being chucked out.

Do you want to lock in blueberry? Banana. We'll go banana. Banana muffin. I don't think that one's right, but... Are you locking

in banana? We're locking in banana. Oh, there's your five words. Good game, tough. They were really difficult words today here, though. They were hard. Yeah, we'll bring Ben out of the soundproof booth, Millennial Max, as he emerges.

Tough, tough words today, Ben. I'm not going to lie. I don't know why I would lie, but I'm not lying here, okay? Okay. You've got to match five words. Now, here there is at a bakery. There's all of them.

All the bakers there. Oh, it's a bakery. There's a dozen bakers, which means there's 13 of them there. They're all playing. And it's time for you to win them $5,000. And bring joy to my cold, miserable heart, because that's the only joy I get is giving away money, Ben. First word, feline.

Cat. There we go. There we go, Heather. Yay. I'm excited to feel this, though. The second one is globe. Globe. Globe. Globe. Globe. Globe.

Globe. All right, dogs are evil. Globe. G-lobe. Thank you. Oh, there's a couple because there's... It is a wide range here. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay, because I was thinking the Christmassy ornament and I was also thinking about the Earth and the world. Snow. It's snow! Oh, snow globe.

Jeez, you sent me off the wrong path there. You're like, I'm thinking of Christmas, I'm thinking of the Earth and you come in with snow. Oh, Christmas, yeah, snow globe. It was the first thing that popped in my head. Yeah, but I was like, oh but it could be earth and world. Ah yeah, geez he's doing well Heather. Come on, come on we can do this.

Third word, police. Po-lice. Thank you. Oh there's lots. You've had a run in with them a couple of times, haven't you? Yes, he's had his legal issues, but we won't focus on that right now. He went to court. Hey, hey, hey.

Did community service. Going to lock in cop. No! Sorry! It was the same realm, though. What did you lock in, Heather? I said officer. Same thing.

Different word. Well played. Listen, both of you, don't be disappointed. You all played really well. We'll go the fourth word. Run. Run. Walk.

Well done. And the fifth and final one, given that they're at the bakery, was muffin. Oh, muffin. Oh, I'm thinking either, can I give a couple of options for this one? No, okay, probably not. Cupcake.

No, they said banana muffin. Heather, you and the team played a wonderful game. You're wonderful human beings. Sorry, Heather. You've made me proud, and this will live on in my memory forever, this moment. Oh, me too.

Thank you. Oh, we were close but not quite. It's back again on Monday. Five words, $5,000. Paid to talk words and stuff into a microphone.

It's New Zealand's breakfast. Jono and Pam on the hits. It's time for Spy with Juliet who coincidentally got done for spying through her favourite Harry Styles window and now thanks for a restraining order

has to do with spying from a kilometre away Come on in Ju That's a very sad situation that I've got going on there Thanks for playing along You're welcome. You didn't have to do that But it's a realistic situation So obviously Kim and Kanye are getting a divorce.

They're in the middle of that at the moment and there was discussion about who would sort of, what the situation with all their money would be, what that would mean for them.

But they signed a prenup when they got married so it means that in the divorce they keep everything that they sort of owned and, you know, their individual brands.

They don't have to split that between them. I know when it first came out, it was very surprising that there were media reports that he was worth more than her. Yeah. And you would think that maybe given her activity on social media and their various business ventures, that she'd be worth more than him. But no. No, Ben.

No, you're thinking the shoes, the Yeezys have a lot to do with it, right? Yeah, he's got a Yeezy brand, and I think he's obviously associated with Adidas as well with his footwear. So it's now come out because of the divorce, his net worth has been sort of updated, and it's very different to what Forbes had reported last year, I think, previously. I think they initially said it was $1.3 billion, but now his net worth is $6.6 billion.

Wow. Which is crazy. Really? And more than half of that is thanks to his Yeezy brand, which is like his shoe brand. $6.6 billion? Yeah. Didn't he have a song saying,

Holla, we want prenup? Oh, yeah, he did. He'll be glad he signed that prenup. He did, yeah. Yeah, that's true. Thank God he stuck that prenup. He did. Yeah, that's true. Thank God he stuck to his words. He speaks the truth, Kanye. That is crazy.

Do you know, talking to a girl who bought some Yeezys before Christmas. They're very expensive. Very expensive. She's like, I'm going to wear them to all the festivals everywhere. And then she's like, at the end of Jan, she was going to sell them used. And they sell for more used than they do brand new.

Another 500 bucks more. I wonder why that is. Maybe it's in case they ever stop production of them or something. Crazy. Wow, you'd never think that used shoes would go up in value but there you go, wow. They're controversial in design, aren't they the Yeezys? Would you wear them, Ben?

He came out with the Crocs too, didn't he? The Crocs, yeah. He's a visionary. I mean, you talked earlier about how I probably wasn't cool enough

to go to a festival so I'm probably not cool enough to wear a pair of Yeezys. I remember you used to have his, I remember Kanye West went through the stronger period of his career

and he had the glasses with the, like the Venetian blinds. Yeah, I did have a pair of those that offered no sun protection at all. Shocking for driving. Did Kanye start that trend?

Well, it seemed like. Must have been. Maybe they'd been around for a while, but he wore them in a video clip and then they became very popular. Then everyone was wearing them walking into lampposts. No, you sort of have to sort of,

when you're talking to people, you sort of bob your head up and down to see through. Isn't it bizarre that a celebrity can literally make the most heinous looking things fashionable? We talked the other day

about the Oprah interview with Meghan and Harry and how the chairs they were sitting on are all sold out. Oh, I know. It's crazy. The outdoor furniture.

Oh, my God. People are like, oh, that looks great. Those chairs look comfy and now they're sold out. I know. And anything that the Kardashians promote

on Instagram just gets, you know, sold like that. Now, I've got 21 strange facts about Kanye West, Ben. Oh, here we go. Okay. I'll pick my favourite two.

You always... Yeah, okay, great. You tell me if these make you go, oh, Kanye West lived in China for 10 years. Oh. Really? His mother was a teacher

and taught English in China. Wow, okay, good fact. Did that make you go, oh. Yeah, it did actually. It was a good fact. Oh, now the pressure's on for this fact.

Yeah, you got two. Okay, do you want to know the first thing he purchased when he started making money? Well, I don't know. You tell me. This is up to you. Okay. I don't want to be the person.

Yeah, I'm going to. No, I'm locking this one in. This will make you go, ah, a giant aquarium. Oh, yeah. Oh, no, that didn't make you go, ah. It made Juliet go, oh, yeah. But it was a pity, oh, yeah. Yeah, it kind of was. Yeah, okay. But quite a poor purchase, yeah. Oh, no, that didn't make you go, ah. It made Juliet go, oh, yeah. But it was a pity, oh, yeah. Yeah, it kind of was.

Yeah. Oh, okay. But quite a poor purchase, though. Yeah. I should have stopped after China. China was a good one. China was a good one. Yeah, it was good.

End on a high. And as a spy for war, you can head to the hits.co.nz. Real Kiwi blokes with soy lattes. Mmm. Shono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Let's pay someone's bills. Don't be afraid of your freedom. The Hats live free.

Bills edition. Let's smash another one. I can't. I really love doing this each day at 8.30. And, of course, a Hattery Barry pops in to do it at 1 o'clock. And the Drive team at 4, a bill-busting call. And if you want a bill paid, just text Bills to 4487. And we could be paying your bill.

That's right. we got rid of more debt than a heavy handed debt collector, that's what we've been saying and you can take this money to pay off that bill and the money that you would have used to pay that bill, you can probably end up paying another bill. There's just so many bills in life, isn't there? There is. So many bills.

So many bills. Which makes this competition worthwhile. We're going to go through today to Hamilton Hamilton I understand Producer Juliet Hello Monique speaking Monique Van Dyke How's this? How's it going mate?

Not too bad how are you? Yeah good thank you very much it's Jonathan and Benjamin here representing the Hits Radio Network Oh hi how's it going? Proudly representing the Hits Proudly they were proud of us but we're proud to represent them Proudly bringing you the H. How's it going? Proudly representing the hits. Proudly. They were proud of us, but we're proud to represent them. Proudly bringing you the hits.

Yeah. How are you going? And we're proudly bringing you Monique Van Dyke from Tauranga as well. How are you, Monique? Yeah, I'm doing all right. Thanks. Not working this morning, so it's always a good time. What do you do, mate?

I'm a personal trainer. Oh, get down on the ground and give me 10. Right now? No, she's not working today, maybe, she said. It's not on her day off, mate. No burpees on her day off. Hey, Monique, you texting bills to 4487? Yes, I did.

You're on your shopping, your grocery shopping sorted, we understand. Yes. Yeah. It's always the biggest expense, isn't it, food? I imagine you're running a lot of high-protein bill. Yeah, often. How many in your household are you buying for? Just the two of us a lot of high protein, Bill? Yeah, often. How many in your household are you buying for?

Just the two of us at the moment. Oh, well, nice. And you reckon that's about $200? Yeah, usually send out $200 a week on food. Awesome.

Okay, well, you go and have a good day. That's all we wanted to know. What's what? No, that's not what we're not. Just find out, querying your bill, just make sure it's there.

No. That's the competition, right? No, it's not what it is to find out what it is, but also to say that you've got, we're going to pay your bill. Seriously? Yeah, we right? No, it's not what it is to find out what it is but also to say that you've got we're going to pay your bill. Seriously?

Yeah, we're going to pay it, Monique. Which is awesome. And I'll tell you what, I feel it's a Friday. I'm feeling let's give Monique another $50 to spend on herself

whatever she wants. That sounds bloody awesome. You're wild, Ben. What are you doing? I know. This is the accountants and they're not going to Debbie upstairs is not going to be happy.

She's not going to be happy. Sorry, Debs. Just frivolously giving away $250 now. That sounds wicked. My partner's here too, so that makes life good. What's your partner's name? Courtney. Courtney.

Guess what, Courtney? It's low-level broadcasters Jono and Ben here, proudly representing the hits, and we've just paid for your supermarket shopping for the next week. Oh, that's amazing. Thank you so much. No, you're welcome.

$250 is coming your way. That's all yours, guys. Thanks so much for entering our competition. Thank you so much for the call. Made our morning. Made your morning. Now get down and give me 10. No, they're not.

It's day off. Day off. We'll call you back on Monday and then the burpees are on, all right? Yeah, sounds good. Hey, good on you. Look after yourselves, guys. Thank you for listening to The Station. Cheers.

Broadcasting live and mostly awake. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. Kia ora, I'm Rachel Jackson-Lees and this is The B**** News. This is our dear friend and colleague, producer Juliet, with a buffet of unconventional news stories. All right, your first one Grammy winner accidentally thanks for his award

now we've got to try and figure out what the beat word is a Grammy winner accidentally thanks team of five million yeah that's what you need

to thank we're all in this together guys alright let's say the Grammy award winner accidentally thanks the Hollywood Foreign Press which is the Oscars oh the Oscars thank you who the hell thanks the Hollywood Foreign Press, which is the Oscars.

Oh, the Oscars thing. Who the hell are the Hollywood Foreign Press? Why are they always thanking them? True. Oh, wrong one. Grammy winner accidentally thanks Jeffrey Epstein for his award. No. I'm not even kidding.

So the names of the film's directors are Rob Epstein and Jeffrey Friedman. And he mixed their names up when he thanked them and didn't realise So the names of the film's directors are Rob Epstein and Jeffrey Friedman. And he mixed their names up when he thanked them and didn't realise. And then they moved right along swiftly. Oh, he didn't even just... No, he was just like, and thank you to Jeffrey Epstein. And then that was it. And everyone's like... And writer Prince Andrew as well.

Oh, God. I know, that is very unfortunate. All right, the next news story. Moving along swiftly. Woman caught boyfriend cheating after his Fitbit said he... So after his Fitbit said he was a dirty, greasy love rat. Yeah. I'm thinking the Fitbit was counting affairs as well as steps.

So that's what it revealed. Woman caught boyfriend cheating after his Fitbit said he burnt 500 calories at 2 a.m. Oh. That's unfortunate, isn't it? So their Fitbits were synced. I don't have a Fitbit, so I don't know, but apparently you can sync Fitbits together. And so she got the little notification being like,

old mates burnt 500 calories at 2am. He needs to be a bit quicker. If he's having an affair, be a little bit quicker on your toes. Be like, were you making love to another woman? Yeah, okay, you got me. He could have gone, oh, I was at the gym, went for a run. Anytime fitness. There was options for him to get deeper into that lie.

And the final one, a politician dressed as *** is running for office in Japan. I'm going to say a politician dressed as a competent political figure. Oh, that's quite good. Is running for office. I'm going to say they love their Pokemon over there in Japan. I went to a restaurant in there where Pikachu came out as the chef. That is very cool.

Everything was Pokemon themed, so I was like, maybe it's a Pokemon. A politician dressed as the Joker is running for office in Japan. Now, have you seen the most recent Joker movie? I mean, the Joker's character is kind of quite scary as it is but his is kind of more of a comedic one and he's running for office in a certain prefecture in Japan which I guess is kind of like a region and

he's got all these different weird bizarre policies that he wants to bring in he wants to make the theme song for Frozen Let It Go as that prefecture or region's theme song and it's just bizarre. He's like sitting in a suit with his Joker face on, which is kind of weird. Obviously, it's a studio for comedic reasons.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not as creepy as the real Joker. But it's kind of bizarre. What Goes On Japan is kind of interesting, isn't it? Obviously, it's for comedy reasons. I don't know. Is it a wacky radio thing or something? You always wonder if it's something like that.

Did you give your compliments to Pikachu the chef? Yeah, when he came out, I was like, wonderful meal, Pikachu. Wonderful meal. He came out and everyone applauded. It was great. He actually did. You've got to catch them all. You've got to catch them all.

Thank you, Drew. That's the news and beeps. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Ben Boyce Productions Limited proudly presents Jono Pryor's Worst Moments of the Week. It's always a lot of fun, this segment, for most of the team,

except for one person, Jonathan Richard Pryor. I think we just need to have a disclaimer at the beginning of every programme where you go, well, some of the thoughts and opinions might not necessarily be fully thought through before they come out of my mouth. No, true. Just FYI. Now normally I do feel a tinge of

guilt doing this segment but not this morning because if you missed that and we'll play it again later just after 6 o'clock this morning you guys all left me in the studio by myself. And Ben has no skills in running the on-air computer, and we let him flounder. I was floundering for a long time.

You were playing all sorts of music and stuff from another room, and, oh, yeah, it was shocking. It was shocking, Radio, and we'll reflect on that again later. And so now I don't feel bad. This is what's wrong with the world, things like this. Exactly. So I thought I'd reflect on some of Jono's worst moments. This week we spoke to, she's one of the judges on the block.

She's the interior designer. Her name is Shelley Ferguson. And she's also married to Steve Ferguson, who's on the Team New Zealand boat. And we got talking about how he's a grinder on the boat. I want to see those arms pumping. You want to see those grinder arms? Yeah, true.

You don't really see them. I want to see those grinder arms. Well, geez, let's hope he's wrapping those big grinder arms around you tonight. That's a weird, you know, like in celebration. In celebration. Like a hug. Where were you going on that?

I was saying, if they win the America's Cup, we can have a big hug. Oh, a big hug, okay. But then listening to it back in surround sound, I can see why you went, that was weird. That was a bit weird. Fair call. Also, we were talking a lot this week about Team New Zealand winning the America's Cup,

and you reflected on the wind and the factor in the sport. Are there any other sports in the world that rely so much on wind? There wouldn't be, would there? No. The wind chime championships, maybe? You're right. Wind surfing? Oh.

Yeah, we didn't think about wind surfing, did we? No, kite flying, kite surfing. Yeah, there's quite a lot of sports involved with wind. The flatulence championships. And finally, this moment, I don't know what happened here, but I don't know how to describe this one, really, to be honest. You ended up asking Julia exactly the same question. Basically, what she'd just been talking about moments before. We want to know what you don't have that would surprise us.

Now, Julia, you were just saying a friend of yours has never had a what? Never had a TV. Let's go to the calls. Katie, you're in Wellington and you don't have what? We don't actually have a kitchen and a flat. There we go. Hey, good on you, Katie. Appreciate that.

Ju, you were saying you're... Oh, no, you told that story. Oh, my God, me Alzheimer's. Literally. We could ask her about that. I was. I was going to ask you about the TV thing again. What you don't have is a memory.

That's what you don't have, mate. Yeah, no. Put that down to senile old age. I'm sorry, Juliet. That's all right. Yeah. And that is Jono Price. It was such a good story, I wanted to hear it twice in the space of 40 seconds.

The worst moments of the week. Add these two men together and somehow you get three quarters worth of a normal man. The Hits with Jono and Ben for breakfast. Scrolling through your feed. Now, much like me on a Saturday morning doing my household chores, here is a light dusting of the news with Benjamin Ross Boyce. Now, the Wiggles, the popular kids' entertainer group, are in town at the moment in New Zealand.

They're about to embark on their tour, and of course they had to quarantine, which is what happens when you come from overseas. And you remember a few weeks ago there was a bit of, you know, I guess, debate about whether the Wiggles should have had wiggle room to get into an MIQ facility or not, because they had kind of left it a bit late. I hope the newspapers use wriggle room. I think they did.

Oh, good. It's a great pun. Yeah, so I think whoever had been organising it all had left it a little bit late to get them the MIQ, and then the politicians started lobbying, saying we should let the Wiggles in. And they did. Let them wiggle out of it? They wiggled their way out of it.

But yeah, but they've just talked about it for the first time, the Wiggles, and they got death threats over MIQ. I understand people can get quite upset because they want friends and family to have those spaces. And the government have said they've found extra spaces, whether that's true or not, I'm not sure.

But yeah, I thought it was quite full on. It is quite full on, but you do understand the emotions surrounding it. I mean, you've got someone trapped in New York and they can't get home and you read a news story going, oh, the Wiggles get to come. The Wiggles? Yeah, yeah, I know I do. I see the emotion, but death threats may be a bit far, but I understand. Wake up, Geoff.

What happened to Geoff? Well, he got attacked by a disgruntled New Zealander stuck overseas. So the Wiggles are about to head on their nationwide, sold-out nationwide tour. We're all fruit sellers starting very shortly. Anyway, emotions running at an all-time high, especially during that period. I might have chilled out a bit now.

Your sister's coming out of quarantine today, Jude. She is, yeah. She's been living it up in quarantine in the mighty Ibis in Hamilton. She actually really enjoyed it. I wasn't expecting her to enjoy it. I thought she'd gone sane. Mind you, she's sending you spreadsheets of a holiday that you're going on with blow-by-blow, minute-by-minute accounts and details of what you're going to be doing on the holiday.

The holiday's not for another month or two. I know. It's crazy. She is just all the time in the world. But it's probably quite good. You know, you can get stuff done. You'd probably be organised by the end of it. If you did it properly, you'd be like, wow, I've sorted my admin out.

Yes. I am good to go. I've pushed reset on my life. You'll be looking forward to seeing her today. Yes, going and picking her up today. And this weekend in Wellington, more than 50 acts are taking the stage on Saturday for the sold-out music festival, Homegrown, which is

happening. Everyone from Stan Walker, Shapeshifter, LMNOP, Op Shop, The Feelers will all be performing in Wellington. Haven't heard too much about it, to be honest. You know, normally you hear it for weeks and weeks, everyone talking about homegrown, but it's on this weekend and it looks like a lot of fun. Maybe you're out of the Target demo,

you're not getting fed the ads. Yeah, maybe, mate. They're like, oh, this guy. Oh, yeah, well, maybe you can pick up your daughter's at the front or something. Yeah. We'll send them to a Dave Dobbin winery tour. We'll tell you about that.

Something really interesting that's been happening over the festivals over the past few months, producer Juliet, you probably would have seen it as being the only one going to festivals. The only one allowed. Not cramping the festival style. Hey guys, I'm still with it. I've got a bucket hat. Oh God.

I'm good to go. Oh God. But Dr Ashley Bloomfield, of course, has done a great job navigating New Zealand through COVID-19. And they had a message, a special festival message that would play the sort of hip-hop-inspired dance remix of some COVID ads they've been playing at all festivals. Wash and sanitise hands often. Scan QR codes. Did the government do this?

Yeah, I think so. I think they were released today because obviously everything has to be released about how much the government actually, they have to be transparent with all their spending. 40 grand they were put together and people were like, oh, 40 grand on that. But I don't know if that takes into account, you know, like the studio, I guess it's studio time, sending it out, all that, you know, there's probably quite a lot of cost.

Listen, I've just looked here. The government has spent $129.5 billion on COVID. What's $40,000 on a dance track? And getting a good message out to people in the festivals. I mean, I remember hearing about it the first time it came out and hearing about it again now. So maybe...

I know they were going, oh, how do we get in touch with the youth? You know, remember they were worried about that a couple of weeks ago. Well, do a dance mix. They did a dance mix. And if that doesn't get through to them, well, then they've probably been on ecstasy. No, we did our own dance remix of the COVID ads.

Remember, we kind of did their job for them. It didn't cost anyone anything. It probably should have because we didn't pay the rights of a Darude or any of the COVID ads. But here it is right now for you on the hits. This is a COVID-19 announcement. When you're feeling unwell, isolate wherever you are. Isolate wherever you are.

Call Healthline about a COVID-19 test. By getting a test, you're helping keep your community safe. Keep your community safe. COVID-19 announcement. Isolate wherever you are. Keep your community safe. Yeah, yeah, nah. Yeah, nah.

Yeah, nah. The home of yeah, nah. She'll be right, and at the end of the day... Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Spy. Go WhatsApp. Spy.co.nz. Fresh from digging a grave to bury another one of your favourite celebrities with some scandalous gossip, Juliette, come on down. Thank you very much.

Now, speaking of Katy Perry, I just played her song, so it's very topical. So she's been with Orlando Bloom for a couple of years. They've been engaged for a wee while, and now they've sparked marriage rumours that they possibly tied the knot in Hawaii. So she was spotted wearing a new ring on her

wedding finger, a gold band as well as her engagement ring. So everyone, you know, the paparazzi they get in real close with those wedding fingers just to see what's going on with celebrities. So yeah, could be married. Is that a secret Hawaiian wedding? Potentially, yeah. Would you have eloped? Did you think about eloping? Yeah, I guess, yeah, we thought about So, yeah, could be married. So they've had a secret Hawaiian wedding? Potentially, yeah.

Would you have eloped? Did you think about eloping? Yeah, I guess. Yeah, we thought about going. Yeah, we did think about that and then having a big party afterwards with everyone else. Do you think your family would have been upset

if you eloped? Oh, I think, no. I think they probably would have understood. And they're pretty understanding if that's something that you guys want. And they're pretty good. Where were you going to elope to? I don't know.

We didn't actually get that far. You know, you talk about all the options. Yeah don't know. We didn't actually get that far. You talk about all the options. Yeah, you do. It wasn't actually something we went, oh, let's go to that. You just talk through all the options. You could get married here. You could get married there. And so I guess that's one of the things you throw out on the table.

But it is nice. You know, it's each to their own. But it's nice to also be surrounded by your friends and family. But it is also nice not to have to pay for them all. Yeah, you know me. You know me. I know you. I'm like, well, that's a lot cheaper.

You're not a kid. Everyone would have been running on a pretty tight regime there with you. Well, I talked about this. Sorry to sidetrack on spy. You're all good. But I went to, because Amanda and I,

my wife and I were in Fiji and on a holiday together and these people had eloped from America. Really? Just the two of them were getting married and they were going to have a big party when they came back. But I think when they got there, they realised there was no one really to share it with. Yeah. Well, yeah, that's what happens when you're eloped from America. Really? Just the two of them were getting married and they were going to have a big party when they came back. But I think when they got there,

they realised there was no one really to share it with. Yeah. Well, yeah, that's what happens when you're eloped. Yeah, and we got to know them over a couple of days and they're like, I want to come to the wedding tomorrow. And you're like, oh, yeah, okay, sure, I'd love to. So it was just basically the four of us.

You had a random wedding? Yeah, I was seeing these people once. We went to America. We went and saw them. But it's not someone you see every day. They'll be like, who are these weird people from New Zealand? Did you make a speech at the wedding? Oh, no, the memories.

I was outside the witness thing and they go, oh, I've known you guys for two or three days now. We have had a wonderful 72 hours. I mean, it was a really lovely experience to be part of. Did you go for an awkward dinner with them? No, we kind of left them to it. Afterwards, we had a drink with them afterwards and then we were like, oh, guys.

Okay, we'll back off. People we don't really know. Hey, guys. Do you still keep in touch with these people we did for a while because when we went to America we caught up with them

and they took us to Disneyland but it was quite then you did a fade out and you'll never speak to them again we should reconnect you with them they were lovely people

they were really lovely people what were their names Britt and or the the other guy Britton yeah Britton

Gary I'm good with Gary Gary sounds good or the other guy. Britain. Yeah. Britain. Gary? Yeah, I'm good with Gary. Gary sounds good. Lovely people, though. That's good. That's good. Jono, would you have a loaf,

do you think, or nah? Oh, no. You'd like a party. Yeah, no, I wouldn't have a loaf. You haven't got married yet. Would you think a bit loafer? No, my family would be devastated.

Yeah, same with mine. Yeah, for any prior myself in a wedding, my goddess, my family would be devastated. Yeah, same with mine. Yeah, if Annie prior myself in a wedding, my goddess, she would have guts for. Yeah, honestly. And in other news, so Blue Ivy, she won her first Grammy the other day for Beyonce's featuring in Beyonce's video for Brown Skin

Girl. And how she celebrated with her Grammy trophy is something only the rich and famous would do because you're probably going to win more and more and more and more in your lifetime. They did a photo shoot. Blue Ivy's wearing this big crown and just drinking out of the Grammy. And I'm like, if I

ever won a Grammy, not that I ever would, but like, why would you drink out of that precious trophy? Well, you put it in the dishwasher. I mean, look at Team New Zealand. They were all drinking out of the cup. It's a celebration. She's already won multiple awards. She won a BET award too for that song.

She's got her own stylist, Blue Ivy. She's nine years old. That's impressive. I remember when I had to sack my first stylist at age nine. And do you want to know another fact? She likes Demi Lovato more than she does her mum's music. Oh, really? Really?

That's great. But I mean, even your parents are like, does her mum's music. Oh, really? Really? That's great. But, I mean, even your parents are like, oh, mum, dad. Yeah, yeah. I had Poppy, my daughter, the worst possible thing happened to her after school yesterday. I had to pick her up. And the boys on the field had kicked the ball over the fence. And I'm like, hey, I'm an athletic guy. I can kick this ball back.

And I thought I was an okay kicker. But then it went off the side of my foot and then bounced into a house and she literally hit me in the hands. She disowned you in that moment. You know, if her dad was Dan Carter or someone, it might have been a better kick. There's nothing more embarrassing than embarrassing dads at the schoolyard. But the only joy you get is a dad.

It's embarrassing. It's why I hate kids. Embarrassing, ridicule little human beings. And that is Spy from where you can head to thehits.co.nz To everyone pulling a sickie today, you're not fooling anyone. Jono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. It is Jono and Ben on a Friday morning. That is such

a good feeling and we want to know, I don't know why we get to judge this, but we do it. We like doing this on a Friday. Who's going to have the best weekend? Yeah, it's one opportunity to come on here and shamelessly brag about how good the next two days are going to be in your life and make the rest of us question our life decisions. That's what you do right now. What are you doing this weekend, Ben? Well, I'm hanging out with you.

We're doing some filming. We're wrestling as a tag team. That's true. Oh, there we go. The competition's over then. We've won. We've won. Best weekend ever.

We did some training last night for it, and both of us are hobbling around. We're not built for, I don't know what we're built for, but we're definitely not built for wrestling. You can come and see us at the Balmoral War Memorial Hall. Oh, yes, Saturday night.

It's at the War Memorial Hall. Yeah, it is. We're going to be donning lycra, and I honestly have a newfound, I don't know where my respect level sat for the world of wrestling but now they've gone up because they put their bodies on the line

you think they don't hit each other or touch each other no they do it's a lie and the falls and stuff they take not good for me not good for me that's for sure I'm hobbling around this morning

so we'll see what state we are in on Monday he injured himself just walking into the ring he got his foot caught on the side of the rope and then landed face first in the ring. Nothing's more embarrassing than that, eh? Just walk into the ring. No one's there to get you. Do you want to come along and watch us

at the Bell Memorial Hall? I think I'm good, thank you. Okay, the office is there if you want. Thank you. But you know where we'll be. I'll watch it, Zach, or you can send me some videos. Well, I tell you what, we'll put your name on the door, Juliet, and we'll leave a little seat for you.

Juliet's all set here. We'll keep looking. She'll come. She said she was going to come. Yeah, totally. Why are you going to have a good weekend? It's going to be a lot better than ours, that's for sure. Give us a call.

Oh, 100 of that. We'll do it next. Chelsea, you're on the air. How you going, Chelsea? Hello. Hi. What are you going, Chelsea? Hello. Hi. What are you doing this weekend? Going to the race track.

Oh, have you got your son there too? What's your son's name? We've got Isaac and Daniel, five and six years old, in the car. And what are you guys going to do this weekend? You guys are on the race track, are you? Yeah. Oh, that's adorable. Is that dirt biking or something,

is it? Yeah. Oh, biking in the dirt. Well, that's a good weekend. They heard you asking what people were doing this weekend and they both got really excited and said we're going motorbiking with Daddy. Can we tell them? Oh, that's awesome. You sound like you're having the great weekend. Enjoy that, guys. You sound like you're having the great weekend.

Enjoy that, guys. Thank you so much for listening and calling in. We appreciate it. Very cute. It's what this show needed was some cuteness. I know.

Yeah, I've been saying it all along. Nick, you're on the air. What are you doing this weekend? I'm going dirt biking as well, mate. Are you? Are you taking kids dirt biking? Yeah, I'll stick to them. Oh, wow.

Jesus. You aren't the father of those kids we were just talking to. No. No. That would make New Zealand a very small country.

New Zealand's number one show for dirt biking enthusiasts. That's the hits. Well, you both have a good weekend. It's a tie since you're doing exactly the same activity.

Well done. Well done. Can we get three from three on dirt biking or not? Susan, what are you doing? We are going to Wellington. We're taking the eldest grandie out for her birthday. So we're going to the zoo.

We're going to the movies. We're going to the stock car. Oh, that sounds so awesome. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from sex on The Hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast. Friends of Skinny.