Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - May 12 - The A To Z Of New Zealand, It's International Nurses Day, Rude Awakening

Episode Date: May 11, 2020

Lost & FoundThe A To Z Of New Zealand We're doing a Zoom-A-Thon  SpyHow great is the St Pierres jingle!It's International Nurses Day todayWhat are you going to miss about lockdown?Big News Small TownRude AwakeningScrolling Through Your Feed Controversial CalloutsSpySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome to the podcast. On a Tuesday, Jono and Ben with you. A big day today on the show. We're gearing up for our Zoomathon, the world's longest Zoom call. It's happening tomorrow. Yeah, very pumped. And we pay homage to the nurses on International Nurses Day with a wonderful tribute. It's meant to be a wonderful tribute, but you kind of railroaded a little bit. I didn't mean to railroad.

It actually came from the heart. Now, we are also, it's a little Easter egg on our podcast, still working out if we receive emails from our old company, MediaWorks. Yeah, because we haven't worked there for a while now, but they have yet to lock us out of their email system, and we're just keeping you up to date on the podcast. Well, yeah, yeah. MediaWorks and the emails works, still coming

through and just so you know the lift will be out of action for a few hours for maintenance today so that's the update today, they'll let us know when it's all up and running again. It was a slow it was the world's slowest lift too that one wasn't it? Oh the one, yes. Yeah it took you about three years to get from level

zero to level two, pretty much what it feels like in terms of dropping from level three to level two at the moment but we've got about three years to get from level zero to level two. Pretty much what it feels like in terms of dropping from level three to level two at the moment. But we've got a very exciting podcast. Gee, I tell you what, who's excited about this podcast? Who? I don't know, I was hoping you were going to be. Oh, okay, well I am quite excited, so I'm quite excited.

No, you're not. No, I'm excited, but I'm not exciting, but enjoy the podcast. Hey, you've got toothpaste on the side of your mouth. It's Jono and Ben on my heads. Jono and Ben's Lost and Found. We've got a Dyson Supersonic hair dryer. I love a Supersonic. It sounds awesome.

It sounds unnecessary, but it sounds cool. $599 is what this is worth, and if you get all five hair-related questions correct, you can take that home with you. If you like blowing hot air onto your scalp, this is the prize for you. Rosetta's with us in Auckland. How are you, Rosie?

Oh, I was all right. I was fast asleep and then I heard Dyson. Dyson! She wakes her up in an instant. All right, that's unusual, but Rosetta, we're going to ask you five questions. You've got all five correct. You've got that Dyson hairdryer. Here is your

first question. What colour hair does Wilma Flintstone have? Wilma, yellow. No, it's red, orange. Sorry. Go back to bed and just pretend this was a dream. Oh, no.

Just pretend it didn't happen, Rosetta. Oh, tappadappadoo. Tappadappadoo. You were here for a short time, but I tell you what, it was a good time. It was a good time. It was short-lived. We enjoyed it. You have yourself a great day.

And what are you looking forward to about Level 2? Visiting more people. Oh, nice. That's the thing. Go and visit the old people, even if you don't know them. I've moved in with my parents to help look after them,

so I've already got them. Oh, what a lovely thing to do. Are you sick of them yet? Are you sick of them yet? She might be. She's not answering that. You have yourself a great day. Thank you for trying.

Tomorrow, another chance, same time, to win that Dyson hairdryer. An hour before we kick into the Zoomathon. Like starting your day with panda eyes. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Level 2 is happening in two days' time. And to celebrate on the last day of Level 3 tomorrow, we're doing our Zoomathon, the last Zoom video call. But, Jono, we've been doing this radio show for a few weeks now,

a new radio show here on The Hits, and it's been a lot of fun. So many fond memories. They will live with me forever. I got a text from my mate yesterday, and I thought I could read out the text that my mate sent through, and then you can decide how much of the text you want to hear. Well, it has been going for a while now, so the feedback's starting to dribble through.

People have made up, you know, had a listen, they've given it a go, and now the honest thoughts and opinions are coming through. We rang, actually, Barb yesterday because she texts the show, right? Yeah, she was a little dubious. What was running through your head when you were dubious about us, Barbara? Oh, I thought, oh, these young guys,

I don't know if I'll get your humour, and you race on about, rabbit on about different stuff that I really think are a waste of time. So that was Barb. So although we flipped Barb. We did. She was like, I'm still listening.

I haven't changed dot, dot, dot yet. Yet. With some threatening question marks at the end of her text. But lovely. Barbara's still listening. She texted yesterday. We do appreciate your feedback.

4, 4, 8, 7 at any stage. So this is a text from my friend. And John, I like a pick a path. Like one of those books, you can decide how much you want to hear. Okay. Okay. appreciate your feedback. 4487 at any stage. So this is a text from my friend and John, I like a pick a path. Like one of those books, you can decide how much you want to hear. Okay. Okay, so first line. Hey bro, just wanted to say I'm really enjoying your new radio show. Oh, I love this. Keep it coming. You want to keep it?

You know, you know I'm a narcissist at radio announcing. Keep this wonderful feedback flowing. Okay, our family have it on most mornings during lockdown. It's funny. Great. So you want to stop there or you want to keep going? I feel like there's a rug pull coming up.

No, no, no. It's positive stuff. So you want to just... Keep it going. Okay, keep it going. The kids always wanted to listen to ZM and me, Hauraki, so we find your show is a good compromise. He got quite detailed on the feedback. So I guess reading between the...

Why didn't he just stop after the first two lines so he really went into some detail for us this is what this is very new zealand so you're happy with being the compromise show or i'm happy with that we're like the swiss of radio he said next to be honest your show is not as lame as i thought it was going to be haha it's a compliment yeah you want to keep your money keep going oh it keeps going. He really went into some detail. He said, the music is pretty good too. I know every song. Great. It was always the wife's first choice station,

but now we're all loving it. Okay. Do you want me to stop there? I'll stop. Do you want me to stop there? Does it get better or worse? You decide. Next slide.

Although her mum, who is staying at the moment, can't stand you guys. Okay. A little bit of a, yeah, right. Stop. No, no, keep going. Particularly Jono. Gotta stop the news stage. Catch up soon, keep up the good work. So there you go.

There we go. So there was quite detailed feedback. As you say, I was like, why don't you just stop and say, hey, we're lucking the show. We're like the Coldplay of radio, aren't we? No one really wants us there, but you'll put up with us. Pretty inoffensive. You don't say your mates that you like them, but you're like,

oh yeah, but yeah. We apologise in advance. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. My favourite Maroon 5 story, remember for work we were in America, producer Juliet, and it was the Hollywood you got all the stars on the footpath there, the Walk of Fame. And Maroon 5 were getting their, just by coincidence,

outside the place we were staying, were getting their Hollywood star. Oh, yeah, Adam Levine was out there, wasn't he? Yeah, and then there was this very aggressive lady who was like, what about the other members of Maroon 5? It's not all about Adam Levine. And just screamed through the whole, like, didn't stop. Screamed through the whole presentation. I was like, well, she's got a point, I guess.

We weren't close enough to see whether he was just getting one for himself or the whole band, but she was furious. Yeah, she was like, I wouldn't even be able to tell you what the other members of Maroon 5 look like. They have no importance whatsoever. They're probably standing next to the lady. She had no idea. Ben, you could be the drummer in Maroon 5 and I

wouldn't even know. Well, that's true. Anyway, we're on a mission to phone all 570 towns in New Zealand. It's going to take us two and a half years. We started last week. The novelty may have worn off, but hey, once we start something like Syred, we climb that mountain

and we leave the Sherpa down the bottom just a little bit lower so we are the first to the top of the mountain. It's going to take us two and a half years. We're doing it alphabetically. The A to Z of New Zealand. Yeah. Today, where are we going?

It's amazing because it's such a small country. How many places you've never heard of? Are you finding that? Oh, yeah, especially these very small places with the population under 100 and things like that. Yeah, today we're heading to Akitio, which is about an hour away from Daniverk on the coast there. And it seems like a place that, you know, you'd live there and the world would forget about you.

Looking at the pictures. Do they even know that there's a worldwide pandemic going on? Who knows? There's no communication with this place whatsoever apart from now. This is the first phone call they've had since 1995. Let's go through to Akitio. Good morning, Donna. Donna!

Hello. Hello. This sounds like it's going to be a salacious phone call. It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits Radio session. How are you doing? Oh, my gosh. I'm fine, thank you. Donna, what are you up to, mate?

You sounded like you're up to something shady. Oh, do I? No, I'm actually doing the vacuuming. Oh, all right. Oh, nice. We're ringing every town and place in New Zealand. Oh, that is lovely of you. And you're in Akato. Yes. Tell us

about Akateo. It sounds like a wonderful slice of paradise. Akatea is a lovely slice of paradise. We've been there for 25 years. Well, that's a long time to be stuck in isolation like that. Yes, I know, but it's you've got the beach. Yeah, and 111 people live there. Uh, no. I said it with confidence,

so just agree with me. You can just pretend, but anyway. Okay. How many? About seven to ten down the beach now. I think I've been to the Puketoi Rugby Club. Is that right? Is that close?

Well, it is sort of. We've got Pongaroa, which is only half an hour away from Akatea. I think I went up to the bar and I ordered a beer and they gave me

a rather large bottle of beer. It wasn't quite what I expected. Very rural. Oh yeah, I'm a lightweight to be honest. Maybe it was just

a normal sized bottle of beer but you're so tiny. Well, maybe it was. Four days to drink that beer. For those not in the know, whereabouts is Akatea in New Zealand? It's on the east coast, an hour out of Dannevirke, and it's a very little part of Taurua that's really special. It's a hideaway. There's a lot of

batches there, but we also do have the community hall and that sleeps 48 people. 48 people! Listen, there's no shortage of anywhere to sleep in Akatio, as long as you're not 49th.

And what do you do, Donna? What do you do in Akatio? Well, we're in the fireillo, as long as you're not 49th. Yeah, and what do you do, Donna? What do you do in Arcotillo? Well, we're in the fire force. My husband's the fire chief. Oh, nice. And we set up the civil defence. I doubt there wouldn't be many... Do you sometimes just light fires

so he's got something to do? Oh, no. You get the occasional mag, you know, yes. Now Ben, Ben was also reading too. There was a bit of a hoo-ha. Oh yeah, someone wasn't happy. Some of the young hooligans

were speeding in their cars and there wasn't enough signage on the beach. Someone was having a moan, Donna. Please tell us it wasn't you. It wasn't me. Or else this is awkward. We'll let you get back to your vacuum cleaning. Thank you very much for telling us all about your beautiful slice of paradise.

Well, I hope that I've been of some help. You have been. It is a beautiful place. It sounds beautiful. You've got 10 seconds to sell it to New Zealand. Take it away. Oh, my gosh. It's a beautiful place. You should come and You've got 10 seconds to sell it to New Zealand. Take it away. Oh my gosh. It's a beautiful place. You should come

and visit. The people are lovely and they don't take you for granted. They're very friendly and it's worth it, yes. If you don't want to be taken for granted, you go to Akateo. And take us out with your vacuum cleaner as well, Donna. Let's hear some of that. Let's hear some vacuuming.

You want the noise. Yeah, it's radio. It's good for the audio. There you go. It's a powerful one. It is. What are you running there, an Electrolux or what is it? It's a Karcher. Oh, Karcher, yeah. No, they're a good brand. Good brand, yeah. Good suction.

Oh, very good. Yeah, good on you. When you've got pets. Well, you do. Anyway, I was going to get hate that when you've got pets. Well, you do. Anyway, I was going to get into vacuum cleaner chat, but that's for another day. But I got one. It was Dyson.

Quite good for pet hair, but anyway. Tell you what, we'll call you back same time tomorrow for vacuum cleaner chat, okay, Donna? All right, we take care. All right, see you, Donna. Nice talking to you. Thank you. Making poor life decisions every morning.

It's Jono and Ben on the hits. 11.59 tomorrow night. And we were just talking during that song. A lot of people would have just not left their house in six weeks. We've been, I guess, lucky enough to come into work and have some form of normality. But I imagine anxiety levels for a lot of people leaving their house for the first time in six weeks.

Yeah, and kids returning to school not till next Monday. A lot of kids haven't been out anywhere at all. So it's really a weird time for the country. The kids give zero cares, don't they? This has affected children in no way. I reckon we should all think like kids and not care about anything. I don't know what would happen to the world, but they don't worry about anything. Obviously, we're,

Producer Julia, you're just saying, you know, a lot of, you know, bad things have come out of, you know, this whole pandemic, but then a lot of good things as well. Like you've kind of, we've all slowed down a bit.

Yeah, yeah. Everyone's just taking the time to kind of pause, think about what's actually important and, you know, hopefully make changes for when everything goes back to normal. Yeah, I haven't shaved some important parts for a very long time.

Wow. It's like the Rimutaka Rangers down there. Bunnings, weed whackers are available, I think. I might need you to get petrol line trimmer. That's how much I trust you. I'll let you petrol line trim me. Oh, maybe we could do that at 11.59 during our Zoomathon. On Wednesday, we're trying to break the world record for the world's longest Zoom, Zoom. Gotta get, get. Zoom, Zoom, Zoom. On Wednesday, we're trying to break the world record for the world's longest Zoom video call.

We start at 8 o'clock, and when we stop, we don't know. But we're hoping to go all through the day and all through the night. And do we have to stop together is my question. Like, if I get to 7pm, I'm like, hmm, I'm out. Here we go. And you keep going. This is just an open discussion, because I know this is a project you're passionate about.

Oh, I see you you're passionate about there. I've always stated my excitement levels are probably not as high as yours for the project. I see, I see. That's fine. I guess technically not. I guess that's an option. That's an option if you want to take that road.

So I could do that. I could be like, okay, I've had enough Zoom meetings for the day, but you can continue on. Yeah, well, I guess that's an option. That's an option. It'd be like sort of leaving a man at war, though, wouldn't it? I'll come back, check in with you in the morning, a bit of a sleep.

Hopefully the war's still going. I'll pick it up where you left off. That's an option. I mean, it's not, you know, Willy Apiata or someone wouldn't do that to you. No, you wouldn't. But I would. I'm not Willy Apiata. No.

Anyway, we're booking a lot of people. And, well, Ben, you've been doing a good job booking people. Producer Juliet, have you been booking people? No, not really. Well, thanks, guys. Thanks, guys. I haven't booked people. But Ben has booked hundreds of people.

Seriously, he's done a bloody good job. He's got a spreadsheet. I've been bombarding people. Like, yeah, I really have been pestering people. Yeah, you name everyone who's been on an island laden with celebrities. Even people like I'm sending messages to, you'll never see this, but, and I'll send them a message. Who? Who did you send it to?

People like, Kiwis overseas, like Stephen Adams and people like that. You know, like I said, you'll never see this, but. And guys, guess what? He hasn't seen it. He hasn't seen it. He might come through. He might do seen it. He hasn't seen it. He might come through. He might do. So you're booking these.

You've got these celebrity emails, and you're pestering. Pestering people. Now you want to pester some of these people some more. Yeah, so I've got hold of the spreadsheet that you made, which is fantastic, and we're going to book something because we are actually having a hard time

getting people to have Zoom meetings at three in the morning. Yeah, it's not a shift that anyone really wants, is it? No, no. I mean, I'm not even going to be there at three o'clock in the morning. Yeah. So we're going to phone some of the people on the list and just go, hey, just confirming you're doing this.

Great. We'll book you in for three in the morning and just get their reaction. Yeah, because this is not the time they have been booked in for, but it'd be quite fun to pretend that they're booked in for three o'clock. So just going to call Art Green here and see. No, Art Green's actually locked in for, but it'd be quite fun to pretend that they're booked in for three o'clock. So just going to call Art Green here and... Art Green's actually locked in for an ice bath. He's going to be doing an ice bath at his house and one of us is going to get into an ice bath at work.

Ice bath? You never told me about an ice bath. I don't tell you about any of these things. Your enthusiasm was already quite low. Hello, Art speaking. Jono here, mate. Jono Pryor. How are you, bud? Yeah, good. How are you? Yeah, Hello, I'm speaking. Oh, Jono here, mate. Jono Pryor, how are you, bud? Yeah, good.

How are you? Yeah, good, dude. Good. Sorry to bother you. I haven't caught you at a bad time. No, no, you're all good. Hey, listen, I was just, are you all confirmed

for the Zoom-a-thon thing we're doing? Yes. Wednesday at, is it 10.30 or around then? Three. Oh, three. Okay. 3 a.m. 3 a? 3. Oh, 3. Okay. 3 a.m. 3 a.m.

F*** off. We'll talk to you then. Who's doing those ones? Well, hopefully you were. We got you down. Then we got Matilda. She's going to take out 3.30 to 4. Yeah.

And then, you know what? We'll wake Milo up. He can do one for you. Get your baby in there as well. Yeah, we'll wake Milo up and he can do one for you. Get your baby in there as well. Yeah, we'll just sit down. Your first reaction was f*** off.

That was your reaction, wasn't it? No, you are actually booked in at your normal time. 10.30, yeah. Oh,

brilliant. And, hey, I'm just here with Maddie. She said she's keen to do it as well if she's got a time. I have to try because I keep forgetting but I'm definitely keen with Maddie she said she's keen to do it as well if she's got a time I have five

that I keep forgetting but I'm definitely keen she's one of the ones I'll be pestering poor old Matilda Rice Ben Boyce has been cyber bullying people into this

I'm so sorry I'm bloody useless with comms but I'm definitely keen okay 4am is all good listen you're our favourites love you too and we'll speak on Wednesday useless with comms, but I'm definitely king. Okay, 4am is all good? I don't know. Listen, you're our favourites.

Love you too and we'll speak on Wednesday. Sounds good, guys. See ya. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. Spy, know what's up. Spy.co.nz. No one knows the filth on all of the celebrities more than producer Juliet. She gets it.

This is what wakes her up in the morning, the filth. The celebrity filth. It is my pride and joy, I tell you that. Bathes in the celebrity filth. What's going on? Celebrities and the who's who of the fashion industry are all cashing in on COVID by making designer face masks, selling them for 10, 15 bucks.

They're reusable, obviously. Fashion, design. The Weeknd's also doing one as well. Well, what's a worldwide pandemic if you can't cash in on it? That's what I've always said. That's one of my famous sayings, isn't it? I brought this in. It was in my pocket.

So the kids made this. What is that, a G-string? What? No, they made masks. They showed it on TikTok, but it's actually out of one of my socks. It's a sock? Yeah. It's a mask?

Oh, okay. Yeah. That works. It really works. It kind of does work at a slightly huge... Oh, God. Yeah. You've got to go with the clean socks, obviously.

And I didn't know I'd sacrifice socks for this. There's many great mask alternatives out there as well. They do say, like, a scarf and a bandana works a treat too. Would you wear one? Like on, I guess, you're travelling on a plane and stuff. Surely you would in level two, right? We should cash in on this. Yeah.

We should do our own. We should do. We should cash in on it. No, cash in on it. No, let's not cash in on it. Let's cash in on it. Signature range mask with like funny sayings on it. Like, sorry, just had lip filler.

Or, uh-uh, no kissing, I'm taken. I like the funny slogans. I don't like the cashing in on it. Maybe just give them away. Promotional mask. What's that? Promotional mask. How about New Zealand?

Oh, no, cash in. I'll bring in some of my socks tomorrow. We can manufacture some. You can have like, sorry, got rampant cold sores. Things like that. It's slogans on the mask. Try to keep New Zealand safe. It rampant cold sores. Things like that. His slogan's on the mask. Try and keep New Zealand safe. It's a good idea.

Let's do that. And Temuera Morrison has signed on to play Boba Fett. Boba Fett? Boba Fett? Yeah, Boba Fett, yeah. Boba Fett in season two

of the Star Wars series The Mandalorian. So it's going to be released in October. And this is not the first time he's been a part of the Star Wars franchise so he's back, baby.

Disney, I've gone on to Disney+. Damn, they're milking that Star Wars udder. There's Star Wars everything. There's Star Wars spin-offs, Star Wars this, Star Wars that. There's all the directors sitting around a table talking. I was watching some of that the other night, all the directors. Taika Waititi was in there. It was just awesome.

I started back at the beginning with Oscar, my son. And he was like, this looks fake. I was like, mate, this is the 70s. It's like 40 years ago. Give George Lucas a break. I was like, mate, this is the 70s. It's like 40 years ago. Give George Lucas a break. It was like pretty impressive at the time. At the time, I imagine everyone was like, wow, this is incredible. He's like, green screen.

Calling it out. Not electronic doors. Clearly someone's just opening those. And then making a noise of, as the doors open. Love those sound effects. Bet that guy's not even hairy all over. And Avatar and Lord of the Rings are back filming in New Zealand, so that's all go.

They had to pause that. James Cameron did go back to California to work on it. Oh, did he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would have thought it was a laptop. Not his laptop, not actually. Because he lives just out of Masterton, I think, in the Wairarapa. So I would have thought he would have stayed there. It's a safer place. Well, there was that wonderful rumour that he had booked out

every single film studio in Auckland for months. No one could use them, just in case he wanted to start filming. And I don't know when that moment was. If it was going to be like four in the morning, he's like, now's the moment. It's time, guys. Everyone has to drop what they're doing. Which studio?

That one. For more, you can head to the hits.co.nz. Wake up and smell them. Actually, no, please don't smell them. That's odd. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. One of the things we love about radio is the jingles and the commercials. It's the only thing I love about radio.

It's why I got into radio. When you hear, well, it's actually literally why I got into radio because I started one of my first jobs in radio. My first job was writing commercials for radio. Producer Juliet, this is going to blow your little millennial brain against the wall. I'm going to have to pick up Juliet's brain matter off the floor. This is how...

I'm intrigued, yes. So you are staring. Look at Ben's voice. Don't look at me. Look him dead in the eyes. Look him dead in the eyes. Why do they make this awkward? Ben, you look at her dead in the eyes.

Look at each other in the eyes. Do not lose eye contact, okay? You are looking at right now, you are gazing into the eyeballs of the mastermind, the composer, the writer, the designer of the Novus Show Us Your Crack jingle. Show Us Your Crack. Ben Boyce.

Oh, Novus. Yeah, well, another guy and I wrote the words to that and sang along with it right at the end. Oh, I mean, we did this. You might recognise this voice. Oh, Novus, right at the end. It's him. It's him.

That's me singing Shows You Crack with a couple other guys. Shows you crack. Oh, look at this. This is obviously the donut version they call on the commercial so they can say, hey, Novus, today you can come in and get a windscreen for just $120. Make sure you shop Novus. When you find your vision like a Novus.

Me at the end here. Show us your crack. Ah, Novus. It's Ben. Ah, Novus. That's me at the end there. I got the last line in that. Yeah, so that was a fun wee ad that we never expected to be used

over and over again for many years. How long ago did that happen? That was a long time ago. That was 1920s, wasn't it? So has that just stayed consistent? It was one of those things that just felt like a funny thing at the time. You're like, oh, that's funny. And they just keep using it, which is great.

Good on them. They keep using it. They don't like it when I always say you never got paid for it. Well, I did get paid for it because it was my job to make ads, so never got paid for it. Well, I did get paid for it because it was my job to make ads so I got paid for it. And you're like,

what's the rule? You always ask this every time we talk to our mate Chris Mack from 660. How much are you making for that concert? You always want to know

about the bottom line. I'm a finances guy. You make it awkward. I got to be part of an ad and I got to help make an ad and it was fun and they used it

and it was a big honour. I tell you what, the jingle game's moved on since your day because now St. Pierre's Sushi, have you heard this on the hits,

they've gone acapella with their jingle and it's amazing. St. Pierre's You're gonna love our sushi St. Pierre's It's always fresh

and healthy It's a good jingle. Ours was a bit dinky and you know, but yeah. So what we're going to do, we're going to play a game now called Jingle Bells where we bell shops to see if they know their own jingle.

So we're going to go through to St. Pierre's Sushi. We're going to just start singing it and see if the person on the other end of the phone picks up. Okay. Going through to St. Pierre's Sushi in New Plymouth. St. Pierre, the French patron saint of sushi. Morning, St. Pierre's Sushi speaking. Whatlymouth. St. Pierre, the French patron saint of sushi. Morning, St. Pierre's Sushi. Can I help?

It's Jono and Ben here. Sorry? It's Jono and Ben here from the hits. We've got something for you. One, two, a one, two, three. St. Pierre's. All right, yeah. That's when you go.

You really love our sushi. Pick it up CPS You really love our sushi Gotta love our Sushi Sushi CPS

We're fading out of this It's always fresh and healthy Let's all sing it together as a group What's your name? James James Yeah One, two

One, two, three CPS We just love your jingle We love your sushi And we love your jingle James. James. Yeah. One, two, one, two, three. St. Pierre's. We just love your jingle. We love your sushi and we love your jingle. And we just wanted to sing it with you. Okay. Okay. We'll start the song again.

One, two, one, two, three, four. St. Pierre's. You give a lava? St. Pierre's. Okay, okay, okay. Do you have to order anything? No, we're not. Well, not today, but we will be in another day

because we really love your sushi, as the jingle says. Thank you, thank you very much. Good on you, JJ. Some people skip breakfast, the meal, and also this show. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. International Nurses Day. Couldn't have come at a more poignant time, isn't it? Oh, yeah, you're right.

The things that the doctors and nurses are doing for New Zealand is amazing right now. We've heard some stories during the Isoluncheon show that we had of nurses that were living away from their kids, nurses that obviously can't hug their kids when they get home, have to go through the whole changing their clothes and washing them and all the sacrifices they're making. There's nurses even living in the retirement villages too.

That's right. With some people. And one, we spoke to one who was living in a quarantine centre with people who had COVID. So, jeez, putting their bodies. So to all of the professional nurses out there, hey, even the unprofessional ones, the ones who have been struck off the register for misconduct.

Less about those people. Yeah, I want to pay homage to everyone. Just like the nurses. Yeah, even the ones pay homage to everyone. Just say the nurses. Yeah. Even the ones who have fleeced medicines from the medicine cabinet and got caught and fired. Let's pay homage to them.

Just say thank you to the nurses. Because it's such a thankless job a lot of the time and they go through some, they see some stuff. And dealing with it, you're on the front line, aren't you? You know, you're people coming in with COVID and things like that, so this

is very emotional music. You may be wondering why Producer Juju kicked this emotional piano music off, because we're heading somewhere, but it's quite early. So stop, stop, stop. Yeah, that's the next, isn't it? No, no, we'll do it now. Yeah, we'll do it now. But I like the piano music.

It adds to the emotion of our message. So we've just written a little ode to all the nurses. When you say we, I haven't had any part of this. It makes me nervous. Is it actually a nice thing? It's a lovely thing. Is it? Yes.

You said last week, you're like, I've written a poem for my mum. It was all about her pushing you out. You know, I want to be like Mike Stace and Nanika. You know, in the afternoons. They're like, they're a show with earnestness and they say stuff and you're like, yeah, it makes me, gives me all the feels. Well, if this doesn't give you the feels, you've got no heart.

Okay. Why can't we be like them? To all of the nurses. See, it's not. Don't, no, because we don't want, I don't want people to think we're mocking what they're doing. We're not mocking. Because what they're doing is incredible.

And so don't. Okay. Okay. Oh, don't. To all of the nurses of Aotearoa, we want you all to know you have a special place in our hearts. That's nice. That's good.

And thanks for tending to Ben's private parts. Okay, here we go. Whether you are stitching up a nasty gash or applying ointment to Ben's rash, you work long hours around the clock looking like a boss in a pair of Crocs. While wearing those baggy blue pants, thanks for injecting Ben's butt in plants. Almost rhymed. This is an ode to the men and ladies,

birthing babies and curing rabies. So nurses, go and have a drink at the IV, so long as it's not a mass gathering. Love, from Jono and Ben. Sometimes I wish there wasn't an and between our names, but there you go. Oh, there's sentiments there, yeah. Happy, happy.

There were sentiments there. There was. There was. And we do appreciate it. I lived next door to a nurse for many years. And she... Great, you can carry on that story. And she was working all hours, all hours.

And she would come home covered in blood and vomit. And they work hard and it's an unsung job. And we pay tribute to them. This is your new breakfast. Health Star rating rating still pending. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Yesterday, the Prime Minister announced that we're going to level two at 11.59 tomorrow

and they outlined some rules and you were saying this earlier that it just felt like the media afterwards were just trying to pick holes or trip them up. Yeah, that's the key where they're like, oh, what does this 10-person thing mean? And Jimmy Nisham, cricketer, has just done a wonderful tweet.

Great tweet. So he's got Jacinda saying, gatherings of no more than 10 people, that's what's allowed. And he's got media. But what if six people live in your house and two of them are pregnant, one with twins and one of the guys is really big, like almost the size of two people and they just want to have lunch and two beers with the hairdresser? Is that allowed?

And I was saying before, I don't even know 10 people. If I could even have a gathering, she's very was saying before, I don't even know 10 people. If I could even have a gathering today, she's very rich of her to assume that I even know 10 people. We're very excited though because to celebrate going into level two, we're going to do this.

It is New Zealand's longest Zoom video call. It's happening tomorrow at eight o'clock. It's going to be the last time I think, it's the last time we probably will be on Zoom, right? Yeah, that's right. o'clock. It's going to be the last time I think. It's the last time we'll probably be on Zoom, right? Yeah, that's right. I mean, no one's going to be happier about the end of Level 3

than Act Party leader David Seymour. Have you seen the size of that guy's hair? I think we should just stay in lockdown just to see how big his hair can grow.

He's two days away from joining the Jackson 5 in their heyday. It's so big. A lot of people calling him Disco Stew. He does look like just from The Simpsons.

Yeah, so hopefully, I think we're going to try and get David Seymour on the Zoomathon tomorrow. I hope so. I hope he can get him a Zoom haircut. But it's the world's longest Zoom meeting, Zoom video conference meeting. We start tomorrow at 8 o'clock and when it ends, nobody knows. But Ben has severed many of his precious celebrity friendships

by harassing people online to join us for the Zoomathon. Who hasn't got back to you? Let's name and shape. No, I'm not going to name and shape. Stephen Adams? Hasn't got back to you? Yeah, but he's not following me anyway.

Barack Obama never returned? No, he didn't. No. Buddy Barack never got back to me, you know? Unlike him, you know? He's normally so prompt in getting back to me. But we have got a whole lot of big guests joining us on the Zoomathon, whether they're sports stars, politicians,

actors, musicians, all that joining us and more from 8 o'clock tomorrow, as it will be our last official day in lockdown. And it's one thing I'm going to miss about lockdown is Zoom. I didn't know where it came from. And yesterday we spoke to the head of Zoom who said they only had 10 million,

well not only, but they had 10 million active users pre-COVID. Now they have over 300 million. Wow. That's crazy. So we want to throw it out there to you guys today. 0800 the hits or 4487. What are you going to miss about lockdown? Whether they're

funny or whether they're just, they're serious. We've already got one through on 0800 the hits. Let's go to the phones eh, Producer Juju. Holly in Invercargill. How's the South? This is this morning. Oh, it's rather chilly. What are you going to miss? What are you going to miss about lockdown? I'm going to miss working in my pyjamas by the fire.

Oh, nothing should stop you going to work in your pyjamas. Nothing at all. No. Who says? Social morals? What I'm going to miss, yeah, same as your elasticated trousers, you know, when you put on track pants, you know, trousers with a waistband.

Doesn't matter what you've been eating, what you've been drinking. You can just get in those and you feel snug and fine. Totally. And the Ugg boots. And the Ugg boots. Hey, well, just turn up to work day one. It might be the new normal. It might be the new normal.

People in Palmerston North have been going to the supermarket like that for years. Maybe you need to move members to Parmy. Let's go to the Waikato. Mary, welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Great to have you on, matey. Hello. You're a good sport. A little bit croaky this morningikato. Mary, welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Great to have you on, matey. Hello. You're a good sport.

A little bit croaky this morning, Mary. Yeah, well, they stuffed a thing down my nose for COVID-19. I had to have a mandatory test due to my job, so I will be. So I'm in isolation again. Oh, you're in isolation again. Have you got it? No. No.

When you have a test done, you're told you're positive until you're told you're negative. Oh, right. It's part of my job, so, you know. Oh, yeah, here, it's very unpleasant, the sort of cotton buds. It's not too bad if they do it right. Right. The trick is, if you think about it as a toilet brush cleaner, only very, very small, like a shish kebab,

one of those... The cotton bud sort of thing, eh? No, smaller than that. Oh, okay, smaller than that. Yeah, and they tilt your head. When they say tilt your head back, tilt your head back. And if you don't,

you end up with a croaky voice on the hits. No, no, this was the good one. So I don't like to think what the bad one was because your eyes water and you sneeze, and he said, oh, that's the good one. So I don't like to think what the bad one was. Wow. Because your eyes water and you sneeze. And he said, oh, that's good. We got it right. That had me concerned after he'd done it. Oh, Mary, well, I'm glad you're okay.

I'm glad you don't have coronavirus. And it's a pleasure to have you on. What are you going to miss about lockdown, Mary? The roads. How quiet they were. How peaceful. I live on a... We bought our house 24 years ago,

and it was a lovely street, nice and quiet. Since then, we've had to put in double glazing and everything because you get the boom, boom, boom. Oh, the bloody hooligans. The hooligans here. Then you get the trucks. Then you get the contractors. Going down the road.

And then you get the boy racers. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. And then you get the boy races. Vroom, vroom, vroom. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. And then you get the motorcyclist. Yeah. I have enjoyed the peace and tranquility while working through COVID because I come home and I go, I really don't need to be having a lot of aggravation in my life at the moment. Well, good on you, Mary.

You're a good sort. And I agree. The roads are so quiet. I drove down the wrong side of the motorway this morning. Love it. Oh, God, I hope not. He's joking, Mary. He's joking.

Mary, you have a great day and I hope you stay well. Oh, no, I'm fine. It's just part of the job. Good on you, Mary. You're a trooper. You're a Kiwi battler. Love your call. Thank you.

Christchurch, Frankie's on the air. Welcome, Frankie. You're going to miss what about lockdown? I'm going to miss having my largest meal of the day at lunchtime. Oh, yeah. Because you're at home and you've got more time to put it together. A lot of grazing going on, eh?

A lot of grazing, and I've really tried my hand at a lot of those tasty videos that you see on Facebook that you actually need to put a lot of effort and preparation into. But it's been good. When have you been wrapping your lips around the Chardonnay bottle? We won't get into that.

Because if dinner's earlier, when do you start drinking? Exactly. If you're eating, you feel like it's okay. I'm going to miss that too. But just drinking whenever you want. Yeah, no one's judging you because you're like, hey, lockdown. You can do that though. So when you go to the airport, you drink any other day or night, people are like, oh, you must be in overseas time. You're like, no,'s judging you because you're like, hey, lockdown. You can do that, though. It's not when you go to the airport, you drink any other day or night, people are like, oh, you must be in overseas time.

You're like, no, I just drove from Auckland. And let's go one more. Emily from Nelson, you're going to miss what about lockdown, Em? Hi, guys. Well, being at home all day, I decided to branch out and explore daytime television. And I have become obsessed with Tipping Point. Oh, the one with the discs? Oh, that's good, that.

Yes. Yeah, I love it. I used to look at it like maybe for five minutes and think that looks so mind-numbing. But now I genuinely am going to miss watching it every day. Yeah, it's a bleak reflection of lockdown, isn't it, when you start to enjoy Tipping Point. Thank you, Emily. Appreciate it.

A lot of people texting in. I'm going to miss smelling my own coffee breath in my mask. Oh, yeah? I, for one, am going to miss the moisture that my latex gloves provided for my hands. You can still wear them when you're out and about. Maybe still sensible. And the smell of latex on my hands

as well. Very rubbery. I think I said it before. I feel like wearing a couple of condoms on my hands. The radio version of Morning Breath. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. It's the big news. Small town. Today we're looking at big news out of Manawatu. A lady is dressing her bear, her soft toy bear,

in different costumes each day. A lovely thing for the community. So they walk past and she dresses it into, like, one day it's a medical theme, another one a patriotic New Zealand theme with a flag. I'm sure she's got lots more examples, but those are the only two I've got for you right now. It's disturbing to

know that anyone would have more than one costume for their beer. Has she got a closet load of costumes? I think we need to give her a call and find out. We need answers. We all get to the heart of this issue. I'm going to go hard on this lady. Why? You're not my costing.

Can I start first? No. Can I just... Well, you bring me in when you want me to go hard, okay? Maybe at the end when she's gone. I'm going to give her a roasting. Why? Hello?

Oh, hello. Is that Elaine? Yes. Hello. Get ready for a roasting, Elaine. It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits radio station. How are you? Oh, hello. Good morning. How are you? I'm coming for you, Elaine. Yes. Hello. Get ready for a roasting, Elaine. It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits radio station. How are you? Oh, hello.

Good morning. How are you? I'm coming for you, Elaine. Sorry about Jono. Ignore him. We're just reading about your lovely story about the beers. Oh, thank you. It's been a lot of fun for me.

It's the highlight of my day, really. You know how I said I was going to give you a roasting, Elaine, and grill you like a hard-hitting journalist? Yeah, good on you. You can give it a go. Oh, no, you sound too nice now. I'm going to back out. She sounds lovely.

I had all sorts of questions. I was going to go, where are you getting the costumes from? Well, that's a great question. Where are you? Oh, where am I now? No, where are you getting the costumes from? Yeah, where are you now? Oh, where am I getting my costumes from?

No, no, no. Where are you now? Why are you hiding? Why are you hiding? Why are you hiding where you are, Elaine? I've got a day off today. Oh, okay. Should be at work, are we? No, I'm not at work.

I'm at home. I was just catching up with my lovely sister in Birmingham on WhatsApp. So where are you making the costumes? Or where are you getting those from? I just keep a lot of bits and pieces because I'm part of the Unity Singers Choir and we put on an annual concert so we end up having sort of a lot of props and bits and pieces to dress up for that concert.

So I've actually got a wardrobe of bits and bobs and then my daughters have left home and they've left wardrobes full of their clothes. Yeah. And it was a Salvation Army bed that was bought for our dog when she was a puppy and for some reason she didn't chew it.

Now I noticed you went for a dominatrix outfit. No I don't think there was no dominatrix outfit. This is very child friendly. Yeah exactly. Thank you. Yeah. Wash your mouth out Jono. I'm reading actually rock star, angel dominatrix, angel, Anzac icon, Foursquare mascot, hospital patient.

You must be running out of ideas. Oh, well, today's Harry Potter. Oh, wow. You could shave his head off. I'm bald. You could shave his head off and dress the bear up as me one day. Well, you'll have to send me a photo, but I don't think that's going to appeal much

No, he doesn't appeal to children or adults No I've got no target demos I'm appealing to, Elaine Well, Elaine, good on you for brightening up the community in Palmerston North And you stay safe in your bubble, alright? Yep Drop into level two, Elaine We're going to go crazy

No, we're not going to go crazy Not too crazy We have to do as we're told Otherwise, we'd be like the rest of the world Exactly, Elaine Alright, stay safe Lovely talking to go crazy. Not too crazy. We have to do as we're told, otherwise we'd be like the rest of the world. Exactly, Elena. All right, stay safe. Lovely talking to you.

You take care. Not a morning person? Sadly, neither of these two. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. What's that? Oh, no. Shut up. Now what?

Oh, it's Jono and Ben's rude awakening. We are up early in the morning, and we want other people to be up as well. And if you wake up someone, put them on the spot with a live radio quiz, they could win some Hell Pizza. And Hell Pizza free range ingredients, plant-based, vegetarian and gluten-free options are now available as well. Yeah, if you haven't heard this before, basically we phone people who are asleep and they grunt, grunt one-syllable answers to our questions. Joining us is Alex.

Welcome, Alex. Good morning. Morena to you. What are you doing? Where are you in the country? I'm in Taronga. And what do you do? I'm a healthcare worker. I work in the activities team at a rest home. Oh, do you? How's that going? You have to bloody decontaminate yourself every afternoon when you come home?

Oh yeah, it's just like frequent hand washing and like changing your uniform when you leave. Yeah. Yeah. And everyone's safe in the retirement village that you work in? Oh, yeah. Everyone's good. And they're in such good spirits. Like, it's really awesome.

Yeah. Oh, good on you. You sound like a wonderful New Zealander, Alex. But deep down, you're a savage because you want to wake your partner Sam up. Oh, yeah. Totally. All right. What's Sam doing? Is he sleeping right now, I'm guessing?

He's sleeping in bed. I'm on my way to the beach with the dog down Papamoa. So you're walking along Papamoa Beach. Wonderful. I will be in a couple of minutes. I've just picked up my coffee. Are there a lot of people up at this time of the morning in Papamoa? Yeah, usually there's lots of people down the beach

walking their dogs as well. A lot of muscly, tanned people in that part of New Zealand. I couldn't live there. Not for me, not for me. Here we go. Come on, Sam. Oh, come on, Sam. Hello?

Oh, good morning, Sam. Good morning. Sam, it's Jono and Ben. So you're on the hits, you're on the radio. There's a lot to comprehend right now. Alex is on the phone. She's on the beach with the dog. She's having a great time.

Got a coffee in her hand. And this is The Rude Awakening. Yeah, I'm just... Yeah, I'm sorry, mate. You've just got a couple of questions to answer Then you can go back to sleep And you can win some Hell Pizza, though For your troubles

Okay, shoot He's ready now Okay, now you're talking my language It's a water shortage Well done, well done And I left the shower running again, Ben, today. I keep having a go at you about that. My shower's still running.

I'm just leaving it on until I get home so I can have another shower. It takes a while for a heat up, right, you know? Dr. Dre is a famous what? Pediatrician, gynecologist, or rapper and producer? Rapper and producer. Well done. He's just woken up, But he's got two from two He's got $20

Hell pizza A lot of Auckland content here ASB stands for what? A. The Auckland Savings Bank B. A. Squatting Bunny Or C. A Sassy Beaver A Well done

He's got 30 And finally Nicole Kidman is from what country? A. Fiji B. Namibia Or C, Australia? C. Well done.

You've got $40 and now you can go back to sleep and have an awkward conversation when Sam gets home from a walk. I'm sorry. Alex, is there anything you want to say to Sam? Thanks, Sam. Thanks. It was a lot. Oh, Alex, Where's my coffee?

I'll bring you This one go Feel like this is a combo You can have off here Thanks so much For playing guys And thanks to Hell Pizza Try their new

Plant based Toretto On any pizza right now At hell.co.nz Like starting your day Without your morning coffee It's Jono and Ben On my heads

Just asked producer Julia Are you a fan of the Drax project And she said What did you say? I was like Yeah they've got some Good music But I'm not like She's not like morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben on my hats. Just asked producer Juliet are you a fan of the Drax project? She said, what did you say? I was like, yeah, they've got some good music

but I'm not like, ah. She's not like, ah. What do you mean by ah? Like wait outside their hotel room sort of thing.

Yeah, like pay $500 to meet Justin Bieber type thing. I'm not that obsessed with it. Which producer Juliet did do and he didn't even

talk to her. No, it's really sad. Now you might be waking up around the country, so we thought we'd update you on what happened overnight. Scrolling through your feed. Yeah, we scroll through your feed. You know, we look past all those influencers hocking off their fit tea.

Go for a rummage on the internet, don't we? I love having a bit of a rummage on the net. Yeah, we do normally love doing this, but today it's all focused around one very important thing that's happening on Thursday. That's right, Level 2. And that's Level 2. Level 2 is happening, and we're here to celebrate, actually,

our show, the last day of Level 3. We'll be doing our Zoomathon. Yeah, the world's longest Zoom video meeting. It's what's pulled us through the last six weeks, Zoom, and we thought we should pay homage to the service. You know, we got it for free, didn't we? Yeah, we did. We should give back to it.

Say thank you. We'll say thank you on behalf of Aotearoa. Now, so a lot of the country opening up on Thursday. Retail stores, malls, cafes and restaurants, cinemas, playgrounds, gyms, travel starts again. Schools, of course, don't start till the following Monday, next Monday, and bars the following Thursday. So if they don't have a restaurant option,

they won't open till Thursday. But remember the three S's, Jono, if you're a bar. Well, I don't have a restaurant option, they won't open until Thursday. But remember the three S's, Jono, if you're a bar. Well, I don't know the three S's, but I'm going to guess. Okay. Be suspicious of everyone. That's a good answer. Shake everyone's hands. No.

And shot, shot, shot. Shot, shot, shot. The three S's. I can imagine for a lot of New Zealanders, shot, shot, shots will be all the S's. Now, patrons have got to be seated. They must be separated and social distancing between tables and one server per table.

So at the moment, if your local does meals, you can go and order a bowl of chips and sit there and have shots, shots, shots. Technically? I'm not Dr. Ashley Bloomfield. I don't know. You put this back on me like I'm the voice of reason. I don't know. I can't answer you that. I'm saying like, oh, listen to me. I'm going to go out. I'm not Dr. Ashley Bloomfield. I don't know. You put this back on me like I'm the voice of reason. I don't know.

I can't answer you that. I'm saying like, oh, listen to me. I'm going to go out. I never go out. The last six weeks have not altered my life in any way whatsoever. I don't even know 10 people to hang out with. I can't even push the 10-person limit. I know Producer Juliet, Ben.

We're not coming to your place. Producer Humphrey. Exactly. And my family. That's only six people I know. We're not coming to your place. Producer Humphrey. Exactly. And my family. That's only six people I know. I still need to know another four. Earlier you were wishing you could rotate all your ten groups of friends. Yeah, he was like, what if I have ten and I get sick of those ten?

I'm not lying. I don't even know. I wish I knew ten people. I thought this was really interesting. So this is from stuff.co.nz, which apparently you can buy for a dollar, according to some. I just put a bid in for us, $2.50. Just trouble him.

I don't know if that's actually correct. But, yeah, so this weekend you can go out. You can play a game of rugby, but you can get extremely close to 29 other people on the rugby field, but you couldn't go back as a team to someone's house afterwards because you'd be more than 10 people, or you couldn't go to the pub afterwards as a team because the pubs won't be open.

So there's some interesting things. I imagine in the Prime Minister's office when they're having this meeting, they'll be like, we've got it all covered and then they go out there and everyone's like, one of them out there,

one of them out there. And then they're like, oh, damn, damn. Because they're kind of making it up as they go along. I'm not saying that in a bad way. This is all they can do, really. Exactly.

Because, you know, no one's been here before in this worldwide pandemic. And they're sort of navigating. And they're doing a bloody good job of navigating the country through this. Yeah. Oh, well, shave your bits, guys. That's not one of the uses. Shave your bits. Time to get back out in public.

There's just going to be hair everywhere. Facial hair, back hair, little curly black hairs Just hair lining the streets People have been like hibernation You're going to go and cut your hair aren't you? I am, I am I'm going to get your bed fully shaved Clean shaved

Start your day the wrong way It's Jono and Ben on my heads I saw no-dose tablets in the BP this morning Have you ever had no-dose? No I don't know what they are, they look good Maybe we should take a lot of no-dose tablets in the BP this morning. Have you ever had no-dose? No. I don't know what they are. They look good. Yeah, maybe we should take a lot of no-dose.

I don't know if that's quite a good idea, but hey. The next 48 hours sponsored by no-dose. We're not responsible for the words that come out of our mouth. No-doses. Why have they not blinked the whole time? But if you're wondering what the heck this whole Zoomathon thing is, well, have a listen to this. It's the world record

no one saw coming. And more importantly, no one wanted. This Wednesday, Jono and Ben That's us. will attempt the world's longest Zoom meeting.

Zoom, Zoom, Zoom, Zoom We want you in our room Talk the night together That may not last forever And I know what you're thinking. All Zoom meetings feel like the world's longest Zoom meeting Well actually, this is the world's longest And to celebrate, we've collated a shoddy collection of tenuous Zoom themed songs

Zoom, shake, shake, shake the Zoom Zoom, shake, shake, shake the Zoom Tick, tick, tick, tick, Zoom There's been one winner out of lockdown And it hasn't been our livers It's been the video, tick, Zoom. There's been one winner out of lockdown, and it hasn't been our livers. It's been the video calling facility, Zoom. Zoom, Zoom, Zoom, clap. There will be meetings about meetings, meetings about meat,

meetings with celebs, and meeting celebs with meat. It's going to be Zoomtastic. They call me Mr. Zoomtastic, Zooming fanatic. Won't be getting any sleep, that's how we roll. So let us send you the Zoom meeting invite. Join Jono and Ben for the Zoomathon, the world's longest Zoom meeting. How long it lasts, nobody knows. Zoom!

Zoom! Zoom! This Wednesday on The Hits. Zoom, Zoom, Zoom. It is happening tomorrow at 8 o'clock. If you want to jump on Zoom and help us through the day or the night, you're welcome to. This Wednesday on The Hits. It is happening tomorrow at 8 o'clock. If you want to jump on Zoom and help us through the day or the night, you're welcome to.

We'll put a link up tomorrow on The Hits Breakfast Facebook page and then you can Zoom on in. You've been doing a wonderful job of booking guests. We've got people. We're going to talk to someone in Antarctica at Scott Bass. Someone in Germany, someone in Russia. As well as that, there's plenty of sports people, musicians, actors as well. But I didn't realise it's all on them. It's all on them to help us out.

Because they need to click the link. Yeah, because we've like got, oh, give us your email, we'll send you a link. But they've got... We've placed a lot of faith in people. I know. I just booked a wonderful guy, a second-hand bat proprietor from Wuhan who's going to be joining us live via Zoom. Oh, great. What could go wrong with that?

Nothing, right? So the Zoomathon, it happens tomorrow morning, 8 o'clock. We jump on Zoom. How long we go? I don't know. Maybe we'll go 41 minutes. Maybe we'll go longer. Our aim is to go until at least level two.

Well, we're upgrading to premium. We're going over that 40-minute threshold tomorrow from 8 o'clock. It'll be a lot of fun. Wake up full of shame. Wake up with these guys. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. I like pineapple on pizza. I like the ads that pop up on YouTube.

Kiwi onion dip tastes like crap. Controversial call-outs. So this is where Jono and I both say something that could be deemed controversial, and we throw it to you guys on 0800THEHITS to see if anyone agrees with us. The last person in that introduction there was like, Kiwi onion dip tastes like crap.

That's Ozzy Allen, who we work with, and he believes that wholeheartedly. He does. He feels like we're – It shocked me. Yeah. He said it was hyped up when he hadn't tried it. Everyone was talking about it, and then when he tried it, he was very disappointed.

As a nation, though, we get a bit excited about things. Oh, you've got to watch this onion dip. You've got to watch the Lord of the Rings. You know, we get a bit too excited. I mean, it's an unusual taste, I guess, the first time you probably have it. And it's like, have this black tar-looking marmot. Oh, you don't like it, you loser. Get out of the country.

Yeah, I mean, we've got some unusual tastes, and really passionate about them for some reason to a point of aggression. I know. It's like, oh, I can't believe you don't like that. It's not like everyone

has different tastes. Some people don't like some things. So what we do is we both pitch our controversial opinion or it could be deemed controversial

and the game is the first to get someone to call up on 0800, the hit's 0800 843 4487 and agree with us. Ben, I hand it over to you, my

good sir. So, I think we're both going food related today. So, I would say, like, if you're going out to a restaurant and, you know, you're watching how much you spend and there's a choice for me between getting a dessert. He doesn't like going out to restaurants with me because he says I drink too many Heinekens and then he has to pay for them. Oh, then you're like, oh, we'll split the bill.

That's for another day. Hang on. And then he told me off the other time. We went to, where did we go? I told him I ordered like a crazy steak. Enough for two people. Oh, yeah. I will just split the bill.

I ordered five kgs of steak. Anyway, well, that's. Yeah, so anyway, you go out and you maybe, you know, you're watching what you spend. So if I've got a choice between a dessert. Not me, mate. Not you. If I've got a choice between a dessert or like a side salad or vegetables,

I'm taking vegetables all day. I'm going vegetables over dessert. I'd rather have the vegetables or salad than dessert. Even at home, I would rather have vegetables than dessert. So if everyone else was having dessert and you felt like you should have something in your mouth you'd go I'll just have a garden salad.

I wouldn't order it like post. I'll double down on salad. Yeah but I just if it was a choice I'll go vegetables over dessert. Oh you disgust me.

I just would. I'd just rather I'd enjoy vegetables. The healthier you are the more unhealthy I want to be. I feel like we need to keep some sort of street cred.

The more you clear your arteries, the more I clog mine. So if you agree with me, you probably don't because it's a controversial thing to say. I 100 the hits. If I get someone through, I win the game. Oh, you're not going to like this then. What is it? My controversial opinion is tomatoes are the scourge upon the world. What? Worse than

coronavirus. Stop that. What do you mean? They've got absolutely zero taste. Tomatoes? Have you tried like a little Oh yeah, listen. To the tomato fraternity, they've tried their best to mix it up. We've got cherry ones,

we've got green ones, we've got ones that are like bumpy testes. Some say jelly bean ones or something. They're like little nature's candy. They're trying to go, hey look, tomatoes are exciting, we've got heaps of different varieties candy. They're trying to go, hey, look, tomatoes. It's exciting. We've got heaps of different varieties. Oh, they're so good.

No, they're not. You don't like tomatoes at all? No, I don't like tomatoes. I like them in a sauce. Right. In a tomato sauce. I'd agree with you. If someone's going to put tomatoes on a barbecue or heat them up,

you don't need to heat them up. But a salad or on the side, oh. It's like an apple that never fully developed. A tomato. I could get a whole, I could pick one up from a fruit bowl and eat a tomato.

Oh, God. I think less of you the more you talk about your love of vegetables. Oh, 800 that's a lot. Who do you work for?

Five plus a day? Maybe. Does anyone agree with us today? I don't know if they do. Kitty's on the phone. Welcome, Kitty. Are you agreeing with us today? I don't know if they do. Kitty's on the phone. Welcome, Kitty. Are you agreeing with Ben, vegetables over dessert,

or tomatoes are a scourge upon society and sandwiches? The vegetables over the dessert. Yes. What is wrong with you people? I'm all about the mains. If I'm going to go out for dinner, you'd better be cooking me a big meal I don't need dessert Yeah, I'm with you I'm with you

That's all you need, eh Kitty? Yep Yeah, get an ice cream on your way home if you want There you go, Jono You can go past McDonald's Well done, Kitty You go and live a long and healthy life And I'll beat you by 20 years to the finish line

Yeah, I'll see you there Thanks for listening, Kitty Have a wonderful day. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Of course, in two days' time, New Zealand, we pretty much head to level,

we do head to level two. The bars are going to be another week away before they can open up. School's on Monday, but a lot of shops, a lot of restaurants, malls, it's all opening up on Thursday. Yeah, and we've just had another important message come through from the New Zealand government.

We need to play this for you. This is a COVID-19 announcement. Congratulations, New Zealand. We successfully bullied the government into level two. And let's be honest, you've probably been acting level two for the last week. A friendly reminder, we are not out of the virus woods yet. Try to resist the urge to shake as many hands as you can and lick yours afterwards. Licking doorknobs and office keyboards is also discouraged.

You are going to shut down your homeschool and take your children back to the proper teachers. Remember to try and contain your excitement until after they have walked inside the school gates. You will probably be reminded why you actually don't like some of your colleagues and preferred them in video form. You will be stuck in traffic. Remember the middle finger is the appropriate one to use in a moment of rage when another motorist doesn't let you merge. Don't forget to aggressively honk your horn at the vehicle in front of you if they fail to take off within half a second of the light turning green. You are more than likely going to get NRL wasted on Friday night.

Remember to tell the boss what you really think of them Try to keep a safe distance as you drunkenly explain what systems you would implement if you were running the company Keep safe, keep a safe distance and wash your f***ing hands Kia kaha from Jono and Ben on the hits And the New Zealand Government I don't know if he can say that Definitely an official New Zealand Government commission Definitely is official.

It's official. Low in calories and low in laughs. It's Jono and Ben on my hits. What's going on this morning? So Harry Styles fans, they are losing the plot because there's a candle that supposedly smells like him or the perfume that he wears. And it's sold out across America.

And it's sold in Target stores. And there are so many Target stores across America. And it's literally sold out everywhere. And they're going crazy. When you said this, I was like, was it going to be the smell of Harry Styles burning flesh? Or, you know, when you burn your hair on the candle or something? It never smells good. Yeah.

You said you would want one of these. The song before, you were like, I would buy one of these. So you, as a grown man, would buy a Harry Styles smelling candle. Yeah, why not? I'd just be curious. I'd be like, oh yeah, it's Harry Styles. Mine would smell like a burning brewery.

Yeasty, quite a yeasty. That's what you want for a candle? You would like, if there was a Dwayne Johnson one, you'd be all over it. But you met him. What did he smell like? Well, I didn't really get up close. I didn't really get up close to,

like I shook his hand, but I didn't get to. It'd just be the smell of burning protein powder. A cloud of protein powder. Pure protein. Well, would you buy Harry Styles candle, Juju? It seems like something you'd buy. I mean, if it was a Justin, but no, just kidding. I would, well, it's cashmere vanilla, they say.

And I do like a vanilla smelling candle. If it actually smelled nice. But I wouldn't go out of my way because it's a Harry Styles one. Right. But I've got a couple of friends who love Harry Styles still to this day and they would probably get amongst that.

I'm not much of a candle person. Although the last radio station we worked at, we always had like a ceremonious lighting of the candle before the show. Well, that's because you'd leave the studio and come back in and you'd be like, we need to light a candle. Yeah, it was quite woofy. Really? The studio was just old and a lot of body odour had seeped into the

soundproofing on the walls. Lesion ears I think was going through. Yeah, on the air conditioning the roof was black. Yeah, you could feel the lesion ears in your lungs. Kept you alive. Beautiful. That's what we used to worry about before Corona

was working in that studio. How to survive in that studio. I think we might have started Corona by sucking in their lesion disease. And an old employee of the Allen Show has come out and told New York Post that the rumours about her are true. This is another person on the list

that doesn't think she's always a nice person, says that it irritates them that people think she's sweetness and light all the time and she gets away with it, but really she's not always nice. Tide's turning on Ellen. I know. Maybe she's busy. Maybe she's just a busy person. No, what, a busy arsehole?

No, maybe she's busy, you know, like doing stuff and she doesn't. I mean, it'd be interesting to see how she comes back from this. Like whether she, obviously she'll make a real good effort to be nice.

But then everyone will be like, well, you're just pretending to be nice because everyone's said some mean stuff about you. You know, there's no coming back. Just let her sit on her big giant pile of money.

That's what I'd do if I was her. I don't care if people don't like me, I'll just sit up on my mountain of money and don't have to hear them complain about me. Like my Harry Styles candle that I don't care if people don't like me. I'll just sit up on my mountain of money and don't have to hear them complain about me.

Like my Harry Styles candle that I put. Yeah. Interesting though, isn't it? To have a public persona that's so warm. Oh, she's the one

dancing and, you know, like, you know, she seems like a lot of fun. There's only a, sorry, you go, Juju. And her tagline is what? Be kind to one another? Oh, be kind.

That's what she says at the end of every show, right? Yeah. But then behind closed doors, I love this. I love this. I don't know. You don't know us? Oh, be kind. That's what she says at the end of every show, right? Yeah. But then behind closed doors. I love this. I love this. I don't know.

You don't know. I just, you know. What was the one I found out the other day that she made? Someone chewed gum, was it? Oh, that's right. You can talk to her. You can't talk to her unless you've chewed chewing gum. You can't talk to her face to face,

which seems like a reasonable demand. She's worried about your oral hygiene. I don't know. I'm trying to stick up for Ellen. Someone's got to. When Ben died his hair blonde, he looked like Ellen. Remember when you had your hair blonde? Bring that back. For more spot, you can head to thehits.co.nz.