Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - May 17 - Jono's Weird Eating Habit Exposed!

Episode Date: May 16, 2021

Hello listeners and hello Monday! On today's show, we discussed the disastrous dates you've been on and whether you're still together with them despite that. Over the weekend, Ben discovered a bizarre eating habit of Jono's, and we also learned about Jono's illegal behavior in a taxi ride! #Naughty!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Hey guys, it's Monday the 17th of May 2021. Shout out to all of the podcast audience.

All of you out there, i don't know who listens to the podcast but remember we did that thing and i was like email me we've got a few emails oh that's good hand out the email address jono.prior.nz me.co.nz now apologies i haven't got back to everyone because i uh really checked that email address this is why i handed it out i wouldn't give you a medallion no no that would be. It's your professional email address that you're unprofessionally clear from time to time. Do you know, I was just thinking that you had a good little sleep on the plane last night coming home from Christchurch, which was great. But you must have been dreaming about a bit of a shit.

Because at one stage you lurched out towards me. Did I? Sort of like, almost like, not like punching, but like lurched out towards my leg. But still fast asleep because Cam was sitting next to me. We both turned around like, what's he doing? Like still asleep. You see the whole thing. You just sort of jolted it and lurched out like you were, I don't know,

dreaming about grabbing something. Like, I don't know, you're playing dodgeball or something. No, it would have been me just you running away with your coattails and me just trying to grab onto them. But yeah, I was like, wow. I was like, I wonder what he's dreaming about right now. I was in a deep slumber on the plane. Yeah.

You know the best thing now about sleeping on planes when we're flying back from Christchurch late last night? Best thing is because you have to wear a face mask now. It's also a wonderful dribble sack. It collects all your sleep dribble. Yeah. Like a bib. Yeah, like a bib.

A mouth bib. Underpants for your mouth, I like to call them. So that was really useful because, you know, sometimes when you wake up, you're like, oh, have I been dribbling, breathing, making noises? Well, all that's contained with a face mask. Yeah, it's true. So it's one of the benefits of that. Now, there was a lady on the plane not wearing a face mask, I noticed.

On the way down, we had that. Is it not? I thought it was. I don't know, but they had a conversation and then they, and I said, I don't know. She explained her reasons and they're like, yeah, okay. Maybe if you've got a medical reason why you can't or something. But then you take your face mask off to eat cheese and crackers and lollies. That seems to defeat the purpose of that, right?

Absolutely. The only time you can take your face mask off is when you're drinking coffee, water, or eating our lollies. It's like COVID's on a timeout. It's a drinks break. You're like, okay, all right. Mask back on. Okay, now I'll get you. Who

needs a breather? It's like tea time at the cricket. COVID time out. COVID's been working hard over the last 12 months. COVID needs to take some me time. You're on a time out. You can't get me when I'm on a quarter time out and the tea and crackers are there. It's like a school playground game.

Time out. We had a fun show today. It's like a school playground game. Time out. We had a fun show today. Jono, well, you kind of bullied someone into a photo. Kind of fully bullied someone into a photo. No, unashamedly bullied someone. They didn't want a photo. They didn't even want this photo even annoying their phone, clogging up their phone.

But they did it out of pity. And we talked about unusual, people who have unusual eating habits. Some of these things were, yeah, really took us back. Oh, and a lady whose first date with her now husband was with his mother. He brought his mother along to their first date. That's right. Oh, confident play. Yeah, and now are they still together or not? Well, you'll find out on the podcast.

Two dads just trying to fill some airtime. Some might say it's pointless, but the main thing is it fills in some air time for us. That is the main thing. John and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Great to have you with us. We got talking to a lady over the weekend. She's married now, but she was saying that her first date with her now husband was an absolute disaster.

He brought his mother along. He brought his mother along. He brought his mother along. Was that just cute? That's nice. That's probably it. Unless he's combining Mother's Day and his date night too. He's knocking off, killing two birds one stone. Mum, here's my date.

Date, here's my mum. Let's have a wonderful conversation. You're jumping forward quite quickly in a potential relationship. An orthodox approach. A big turn off too, too. If you were dating an individual and they brought their mother along. I'd be like, oh, did you just bump into her? I would not assume that they've brought her along

for the date. So certainly something that they want to front foot on their Tinder profile will probably bring my third wheeling mum to see what it's like. Just so you don't get caught off guard. I'm really kind of curious how involved in the date the mother was. Is she asking a lot of the questions?

Are they splitting the bill three ways? I mean, how does it work? And what if she had a better connection with the mum than the son? Like it could have gone many layers. It could have gone badly, but they're together now and she said it was actually fun.

It was a fine date. His mum was hard case. They all just hung around and chatted but at the end of the night you'd be like so where do we go now?

Who's doing what? Who's doing what? Do we all Uber home together and how does this work? How do you split the bill too in that case? Well that's true. Yeah this is a topic

dear to Ben Boyce's heart. Yeah I know the split bills always don't get me started on split bills. He'd be making his mother pay a fair share. Mum you can pay for this.

But Ivan Dates is... I don't think I've ever gone on a proper date. Ever. Really? Yeah. I'll go out to dinner with Jen, obviously. When you're married, is it a date or is it just dating before you're with the person?

Yeah, I mean, you can call it date night, but I guess it's probably not technically date. True, true. I don't know. She's like, I've already got this hunk of spunk. She doesn't have to play again. I'm hers. That's what she says, doesn't she?

Yeah, she's like, I've got all, I've got that, guys. I've got this hunk of spunk. He's taken. I'm like, sorry, guys. I am. I'm off the market. The big dog's off the market. Oh, God.

That's what he meant in the restaurant scene when I was saying that. Yeah, I know. Have you had a dating disaster? Producer Juliet. Okay, I want to play a game. Oh, God. Yeah. So rare. That's what he went in the restaurant scene when I was saying that. Yeah, I know. Have you had a dating disaster? Producer Juliet. Okay, I want to play a game. Oh, gosh. You tell us the dating disaster. Yeah.

And I'll try and figure out if you're still with them. I know the answer's going to be no, because you're not with anyone at the moment. Yeah. No, it's not something that's happened on one date, but I'm notorious for bumping into or walking past or seeing either an ex or a person I've previously briefly dated while on another date and it's so awkward.

It is so awkward. It's happened to me about three or four times like in the last couple of years. Well stop going over to your ex's houses with your dates. I'll make him jealous. I'll show him. Oh it's so awkward. Okay 0800 that's. We want to check this open this morning. Did you have a dating disaster in years gone by?

And we'll try and figure out, through the means of investigative journalism, whether you're still with the person. We'll go to Canaz in Auckland. Welcome, how are you? Good, how are you? Good, okay. You tell us the dating disaster,

and we'll try and figure out whether you made it through. Okay. So, like, let me put this into context. I just bought my new car three weeks earlier. So I was like, cool, like, let's go on a road trip. So we went down on a road trip. Everything was all good. And then she was, like, saying she felt a little bit sick.

So she was like, okay, I want to go home. I was like, okay, sweet as. And then, so I was like, oh, do you need a bag or anything? And she was like, no, no, I should home. I was like, okay, sweet as. And then, so I was like, oh, do you need a bag or anything? And she was like, no, no, I should be fine. So we're driving along the motorway, and I was getting a bit of traffic, and then she was like, you need to pull over now.

And I'm like, okay. So I started pulling over. She opens the door, bombs everywhere, but the road. Oh, okay. And I was like, oh my gosh. And we still have an hour to go to Auckland. And I was like, whoop.

You were going, whoop. And I was like, I can't deal with this. And I was like, yeah, grab a towel. You can clean that up. Yeah, so dating desire. Did they make it through this vom, the soiling? Did you charge a soiling fee after that? She paid for the valet.

Oh, that's not helpful. She would fill the whole door apart. And there was, like, dried vom, like... I mean, it happens, and you feel terrible afterwards. Can I just say, thank you for not sparing any detail. No worries. Some details could have been spared, but no. Okay, what I'm going to say...

I'm going to say you made it through this. I hope you did. Are you still together? Yeah, we're engaged. Oh, there we go. Oh, that's good. It all turned out nicely in the end. Appreciate your call. You have a wonderful Monday.

Cheers, you guys. Cheers, Canaz. Thanks for listening. We'll go to Olivia in Tauranga. Morena. Morena. Dating disasters. We'll figure out what happened after the disaster date and if you're still together, Olivia, go. Okay, so I have been invited on this date to a park and he sort of said, you know, there's going to be a bit of a surprise.

And so I was like, okay. So I just went to the park and I was dressed pretty casually and I show up and it's a CrossFit class at the park. Oh, so you got, well, your first date was a CrossFit class. Yeah. Were you dressed for CrossFit? No, I was not dressed for CrossFit, but I still did the class. Oh, you did?

Okay. So. I like to imagine you're in high heels and a dress out there on there. Nice pair of jeans or something. So you partook in a CrossFit class on your first date. What a monster, can I just say. We'd sort of been talking about, like, how we're both pretty active,

but I just didn't expect. Yeah, look, it's actually quite a cool thing to do on a date if you were, you know, you know you were doing it. You know, like, hey, let's do CrossFit, because it's not an awkward sort of, like, sometimes awkward conversation thing. You're kind of doing an activity. I mean, it's a great thing to do if you're on a date,

if you're Richie and Gemma McCaw. But a first date, a CrossFit class, I'm going to say, I'm going to say you were too cross at the CrossFit class. I don't think you made it through that dating disaster. Oh, we totally went out again. Oh! Back to F45 the next day.

Did another class. Thank you for your calls. Appreciate your dating disasters this morning. Experts in semi-accurate, half-remembered information. Vaguely known information, but maybe not correct. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. Come back from a fun weekend in Christchurch? Yeah, we did.

It was fun. I got in a cab, actually, over the weekend, and I love getting in taxis because no one can escape my conversation. Oh, yeah. No one can escape my conversation unless they open the door and roll out their... I'm sure many cab drivers have probably thought of that. They have on one or two occasions.

I'm like, where'd the Uber driver go? I guess I'll drive here now. But, yeah, I met a lovely cab driver on Friday, actually, and he was as much of a talker as I was. Oh, so you met your match, did you? It was wonderful. It was like conversation ping pong. I'd ask a question, he'd fire one back,

I'd fire another one back, I'd drill down a bit more on his answer, he'd do the same. It was all the way to the airport. 20 minutes wasn't long enough for the both of us. Really? Wow. We covered a lot of ground. We really would. It was, yeah, jeez, I can't even remember a both of us. Really? Wow. We covered a lot of ground. We really would.

It was, yeah, jeez, I can't even remember a point of conversation we didn't cover. His family, what time he gets up in the morning. Oh, you were asking all the elder questions. Lunch, what he eats for lunch. All your favourite light band of questions. What school his kids go to. Doing it all. But then, you know, halfway through the conversation, he said, what do you do for a job?

Because I'd been interviewing him from my house until halfway down the motorway. I said, oh, we do broadcasting. And he said, what's your name? And I said, Jono. And then he said. So you are Jono, eh? I thought that Jono is some bulky guy, like big one.

Some bulky big guy? Yeah, the name is like Joe. Yeah, right. No, I'm just a skinny, weedy bald man. And then who is this, Ben? Ben's even skinnier and weedier. Okay, he's more skinnier. He's more skinnier.

He's like a little boy, his body. So, he... Was that... What? Was that a secret recording or was that like a... Like, hey, mate, I work at a radio station, can I just get my phone out and record? Which you need to do for legal purposes.

Who's to say? Whether that recording was consensual or not. Did it sound consensual? No. Did we hear his voice? Of course he. It sounded quite sort of, almost like taking from the back seat.

That is so sneaky. Mate, you've been broadcasting for a long time. Yeah. No, he was taught. It was to say whether that was legal or not. Broadcasting standards. Oh, who are they? Who are they to tell us what to do?

Anyway, the main thing is that he said some words. And you recorded that. No, accidentally, my voice recorder was on. And he accidentally just played that on the radio. Okay. Yeah, it was all accident. Well, Julie, you played it.

She pushed the button. Oh, now you're getting involved with it. Shift the blame. Anyways, lovely guy. And I've just realised this whole time, we could have been lying about what we look like. Because he had no idea. I thought we were a lot bulkier.

Bulkier. I thought you were a big, muscly, bulky guy. Yeah. So I could have been saying I'm like half George Clooney, half John Legend mixed with a bit of TK

from Shortland Street. Do we look bigger on TV when we're on there? I don't know. Yeah. You don't really? I don't know. Yeah, but you know,

some people don't know so we just paint the picture. Ben Boyce looks like, imagine, do you remember Fabio, that Italian model from the 1990s? With the lovely long hair. Lovely long flowing hair, that's Ben Boyce right now, and he's sitting here with no shirt on. It's weird, HR get funny about it, but we like it, don't we, Jude?

Yeah, yeah, we do. From stealing Mike Hosking's car to stealing the hearts of New Zealand. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. Actual hearts being not bestowed. Now, toast, I find it quite confusing a food to approach. It shouldn't be. Yeah. Isn't it Juliet shaking her head with a confused look on her face?

Well, it's like on many occasions it's fine to consume toast using your hands. On most occasions it's fine to consume toast using your hands. On most occasions. But then when we put other food on toast, then we're required to approach toast with a knife and fork. Well, that's your rule right there. Yeah. But then yesterday I was being judged as I had some peanut butter toast. You had the spread on the toast.

The spread would normally be, that's the pickup. That's where you're picking up your toast. Yeah, well, I knife and forked the peanut butter toast. Now spread would normally be, that's the pickup. That's where you're picking up your toast. Yeah, well, I knife and forked the peanut butter toast. And he was like, that's odd. You see, that's a strange approach to toast. I said, well, the knives and forks were there. I had had breakfast and I had toast afterwards. And I was like, oh, well, I've got the knives and forks there.

They're in play. They're part of the meal. Why not make use of them? I noticed too, because we're out for a lovely meal with your parents in Christchurch too. And your dad, John, got the pizza first. And he went, you know, because you always want to be on best mate. He went knife and fork on pizza. And then I was like, oh, this feels like I need to follow suit.

He's always insisted on knifing and forking a pizza, my dad. Even when we get pizza, like pizza hut and hell pizza and dominoes and that so dominoes as mum likes to call it. He knives and forks all those as well. Yeah, because he went first I was like, oh maybe this is the custom around here that I can, you know, so I felt obliged to carry on

with the knife and the fork. Yeah, he took the lead. He always does it and I've heard him up about it before. I was like, it's a hand food, John. Give that a hand. I won't finish what I was going to say there. Don't do that to a pizza. But we thought because this morning that was a very unusual thing that Jono was doing,

we thought maybe we could open up the phone lines to odd ways you're eating food. Are you eating odd? And does the wider community judge you for it? I mean, you spotted someone pouring what onto cereal? Orange juice over the weekend. Orange juice onto cereal? Why?

I don't know. I'm putting that down to a lapse in concentration. Maybe it was. Lapse in concentrate. Orange juice. Chris, who we used to work with, a camera guy, he used to, remember when he had a meal, he'd have to eat everything meal, he couldn't,

he'd have to eat everything individually and he couldn't mix anything. So even if it was a roast meal or anything like that, he couldn't, he was like, I just had to eat it all separately. He compartmentalises his whole,

his whole, he attacks it one by one. And then obviously the most favourite, the one he was looking forward to, he'd leave that to the end. Systematically navigates his way around the plate.

I eat, and you've hit me up about it before, the apple, but also the whole core. The whole core sometimes, even the stalk if I'm feeling adventurous. I had a friend also who used to try and eat bananas, and I don't know if it was just one of those things, but from the middle.

Like it would open and peel the whole thing and then eat them almost like a smiley face. Oh my goodness. And I was like, are you doing this just to be different? Or is it surely that's not the way anyone eats a banana. But he would just. No, you never tackle any shape food, like the food of that shape in that manner.

From the middle. Like imagine even coming at a sausage like that. And then you've got, your breaks apart, you've got two bits. So yeah, it seemed very unnecessary. So those are the sorts of things that we want.

What ways are you eating in an odd way for some people? If it's just what you do. Juliet? I used to eat terminate noodles and drench it in tomato sauce. I'd get chicken terminate noodles with the soupy water and just like tomato sauce all over it. Don't know why. I was very intoxicated at the time, but it looked delicious.

Yeah. Well, it was very, very tasty. I tell you that for free. Let's welcome from Wellington, Georgia. How are you this morning? I'm good. How are you? Oh, Mordina, lovely. Doing well. Yeah, great. Great to very tasty. I'll tell you that for free. Let's welcome from Wellington, Georgia. How are you this morning? I'm good. How are you? Oh, more than lovely.

Doing well. Yeah, great. Great to be here. Another Monday. Having a great time. Loving it. Hey, what are you doing eating unusually? Well, my kids request every day that they have a packet of raw two-minute noodles in

their lunchbox. Oh, so not even cooked? No, no. Just to eat straight in the little square. Oh, not even 120 seconds of cooking? Yeah, there's not long to cook those, is there? No, two minutes. The packet says it. It's not much time.

The crispy, I guess the crispy noodles? You can even cut it down to one minute 57 if you're feeling adventurous. And so what, they'll just eat them like a what? A chip of some description. Yeah, kind of like a muesli bar, but noodles. Very messy, I imagine it would be. But hey, there's school's problem when it goes to school.

Nutritious too, as well. Two minute noodles, aren't they? Thank you very much. Really appreciate your call. We'll go to Mel in Tauranga. Eating oddly, Mel, what are you doing? When I eat my pizza, I'm the person that eats the

crust first before the rest. You're the person. We've all heard about the person who eats crust first and it's Mel from Tauranga. Yeah, there's not many of us out there but I think it's the best way to eat the pizza. Is it like a cheese crust set up or just a normal crust?

Nah, just a normal crust because you want to get rid of the crust first because that's kind of the bland bit and the end on like the nice, like warm Right.

But then the crust is kind of like where you put your fingers. That's the bit you hold on to. Like, there's some finger magic on the bottom. Do some little twisty twists and you're sweet as.

She's eating out from in. Yeah. That's the technique. It's unorthodox, but we may have been doing it wrong the whole time. How about this one on the text machine, 4487. So I eat my cereal in the technique. It's unorthodox, but we may have been doing it wrong the whole time. How about this one on the text machine, 4487. So I eat my

cereal in the morning. I have two bowls. One with cereal, one with milk. So basically I guess they're dipping in so the cereal doesn't get soggy. They're dipping in. Because sometimes at the end of whatever you're having, it can be a lot. That's smart. The ratio's all off from milk to cereal. Yeah, you start well, don't you, with a little

bit of, yeah, I know what you're saying. Yeah, and it all does, yeah. But then it's a sloppy soup. Yeah. I guess maybe that's something you could try. Tyrone, you're on from Auckland, eating oddly. What are you doing? Tyrone.

Tyrone. Hey, Tyrone. Tyrone. Tyrone. Oh, no. Oh, he's gone. Tyrone. Why do Tyrone Tyrone Oh no He's gone Tyrone Why do I persist with that? No you keep going

Yeah no Keep going He might answer one day And we're not going to play any music Until he does Okay I vouch for that Hey thank you for your calls Apart from Tyrone

You let the team of 5 million down mate I'm not going to lie Ben and Jono Called this show Jono and Ben Breakfast on the Hits The Hets. We just mentioned earlier this morning that we were in Christchurch over the weekend.

We played some Quidditch, which was a lot of fun. It's an actual sport that people play all over the world. Yeah, you too can straddle a broomstick and run around. People came to watch and they could not comprehend how the game worked. And I couldn't comprehend how it worked either because then they chuck another game in at the end, inside the game, while the original game's still being played.

We have to catch the snitch. Yeah, the golden snitch. Snatch the snitch. I got sent off too, which is, so I clearly didn't know how to play the game. Multiple times. Multiple times. Yeah, well, it helps when you,

if you know the rules, you know what rules you need to break and don't need to break. Yeah, but I broke some rules. But after the game, we're inside, because it was like, it helps when you, if you know the rules, you know what rules you need to break and don't need to break. Yeah, but I broke some rules. But after the game, we're inside because it was like, it was a cafe, sort of at a restaurant location. The sign of the Takahe in Christchurch. Have you been there?

It's a really cool spot up on the Kashmir Hills up in Christchurch. And it's almost like it's a medieval castle. Inside, it's all kind of, there's knights and armour and all sorts. It's really, really cool inside. You can only imagine the amount of people who have had sword fights in there. Bill Clinton's been there too. Bill Clinton, he was doing something with his sword in there as well.

We don't know that, but maybe he was. Oh, there are rooms that Bill Clinton had affairs in. He was at a press conference in the photo up in there and it was like oh, he's probably denying something. And his hands up was it wasn't me. But we're inside and you're grabbing something from the cafe

and one of the people that worked there came over and wanted to ask us to get a photo with us, which was lovely. And so we got a little photo and then I guess we were sort of holding up a sort of alleyway to walk past. But anyway, someone else came over and Jono arrogantly thought that this person was lining up for a photo with us. I was like, get in here, mate. Wrapped my arm around and pulled him into the shot.

Come on. And he looked dead inside. He was like, I was just heading to the EFTPOS machine to pay for lunch. And I was like, no, you would. You wanted a photo with your heroes. And then he kind of got into that awkward bit where he was like, oh, I guess I'll get a photo.

Not really wanting to get a photo, but just feeling like that, not wanting to let you down. Yeah, no, it was out of pity. It was a pity show. The more he said no, the more I really wanted him to get in the photo and make me feel better. But then I made him, get out your phone, mate. We'll get someone to take it.

And he's like, oh, I don't really want this clogging up my photo stream. So we went through it. I was like, why are we going through this little charade? It's like, he's going to delete it straight afterwards. But you were like. That's fine. Whatever, what he does with it afterwards is fine. But in the moment, make us feel better.

Because I felt empty. Do you remember when there was, the guy who works here, he turned up at the old place of work and you thought he was a little broadcasting intern there, you know, like a young up and coming. Oh, yes. No, I walked out to, out of the studio here and he was a little broadcasting intern, you know, like a young up-and-coming. Oh, yes. No, I walked out to the studio here and he was sitting on the couch

and I thought, oh, this guy must want a photo. And you're like real patronising, sort of bent down and go, g'day, mate. I had my hands on my knees. Hello, little fella. You talk like you were talking to a baby. You want to get into radio, mate? Little fella.

Hello, little fella. Patted him on the head. You want to get into radio, mate? He's like Little fella patting him on the head. You want to get into radio, mate? He's like, no, I'm actually just here for a meeting. I already work in radio. And I was like, yeah, have a photo, mate. He's like, no, no, I'm fine. Come on, mate.

Oh, God. Anyway, Julia, you want a photo, mate? No. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. Five words for 5K on the hit.

You're only five words away from a massive payday. It is our Game of Word Association. You know how it works. You could be five grand richer if your five words match with our five. This is taking the world by storm, like COVID, although with less health effects. It's five words. Amy, you're in Te Aroha. Morena.

Morena. You ready to win some cash, Amo? Yes. What would you spend $5,000 on? I've got an 11-month-old daughter, so I'd plan her birthday party and then probably just go shopping. $5,000 first birthday party.

That's a party the Kardashian kids would be envious of in Te Arawa. Yes. I love it, though. That'd be wild. Okay, well, that's wonderful to put the money towards. Who do you want to send into the soundproof booth and match your five words with? Can I play with Ben, please?

You can play with Ben. All right. He's hopping into the SPB to the soundproof booth and match your five words with? Can I play with Ben, please? You can play with Ben. All right. He's hopping into the SPB, the soundproof booth. We've lost... Someone's locked the door. Yes, we've lost many good employees inside the soundproof booth. They're not dead. It's just that swag boss Todd goes to fire people

because you can't hear them screaming and yelling and crying. So it's a safe environment. Safe environment. All right, Amy, let's get into it. You know how the game works, don't you? Yeah. And I must remind you too, you can play Five Words Online at thehitstockco.nz.

If you match Five Words Online, you could actually be playing it in real life. Talking words on the radio like, Amy, here we go. Your first word, Amy. Hey, mate. Schnauzer. Please don't ask me to spell it Dog

Dog Word number two, soap Wash Nice Trim Sorry, what was that? Trim T-R-I-M.

Trim. Uh, haircut? Haircut. Relish. Oh. Relish. I don't know what... You could go down a couple of avenues with relish, couldn't you?

Because it can mean... Yeah? Yeah, two separate things. You could be relishing the moment or... The food. There. I might go with... Food?

Food. And the fifth and final words, Amy in Te Arawa, who's going to have the most lavish first birthday ever if she wins $5,000. Leather. Jacket. Leather jacket. All right, those are the five words.

We'll get Ben out of the soundproof booth. A lot of tension. A lot of tension in the room right now. More tension than my hamstrings on my Thursday night Zumba class. Welcome, Ben. Hey, how'd Amy go? Amy went really well. And just remember, this is for

a first birthday. This is for a baby's birthday, Ben. Oh, I know. I want this to be a great birthday party. A lonely baby is waiting for some cake. And it's all on you. Okay. Maybe even a bouncy castle.

Oh, yes, you could. Do babies like bouncy castles? Oh, friends of babies do. Yeah, donkey rides. Yeah. You know, one of those mobile farms. You name it. This would be the best first birthday. It's probably burnt toast.

Am I going to have my heart attack? Yeah, no. So I think Juliet's burnt some toast. Okay, sweet. I was like, oh, God. The pressure's really getting to me. Don't have a stroke now. Wait until you've done your five words, and you can pass out. Okay think Juliet's burned some toast. Okay, sweet. I was like, oh, God. The pressure's really getting to me. Don't have a stroke now. Wait until you've done your five words,

then you can pass out. Okay, let's get into it. Five words, 5K. Let's see if you match with Amy. Anything you want to say to her, Mamo? Good luck. Good luck. First word.

First word, and again, I'll ask you and request you don't ask me to spell this either. Schnauzer. Can you spell it? No. Dog. all this either. Schnauzer. Can you spell it? No. Dog? That baby is so happy. Happy little baby.

Stop lumping the pressure on me. Love that little baby. How happy is that baby right now, Amy? She's actually sitting in the car with me. Oh, smiling away. Happy, happy little baby.

Soap. Wash. Wow. You wash yourself with soap? Yeah, true. Are you surprised by that answer? I don't know. There's just heaps of options for soap,

I thought, in my head. Oh, okay. You're doing well, Ben. You're doing well. Amy, you're doing well. Word number three. Trim. Milk.

Now the baby's going to start crying. Amy. So close. She win. What did you go, Amy? Hair cut. We'll go to word number four, relish. Tomato. It's unripe.

Leather. Jacket. No, three out of five. Amy, it has been wonderful meeting you. You go and have a great week. Thank you so much for listening to the program. Really do appreciate it. And you give that baby a big hug for me.

A big old baby hug. Okay, stop, stop. Thank you. Sorry, Amy, another chance tomorrow morning for someone else to win $5,000. They're proud of New Zealand.

Go New Zealand. If only New Zealand was proud of them. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast on the hits. Spy. The What's Up

by doco.nz. Like my elderly auntie in the Ryman retirement village. It's time to wheel her out again. Producer Juliet, what's happening in Spy? Wheeling me out. Now, Taika Waititi and Rita Ora have been romantically linked for the last maybe month or so. She initially posted a photo of him on her Instagram. His arms were around her and everyone was like, oh my gosh, are they dating?

Not romantically linked, but also literally linked as well. Yeah, true, very true. And now they've been spotted out and about in Sydney with their arms around each other. Photo of them laughing, him kissing her hands. Oh, publicly displaying their affection. That's awesome, that's lovely though. Yes, very exciting.

I'm very invested in this relationship. Yeah, great day for New Zealand great day for New Zealand it's great day for the world he's done a lot for this country

he is but I mean dating Rita Ora is the best it's up there it's the best no well done so he's over there

directing Thor isn't he in Australia yeah yeah what's she doing there I think she's over there for The Voice yeah she's one of the judges on The Voice

Australia Voice Australia so I wonder oh my gosh imagine if she moves to New Zealand. Oh, stop it. We couldn't handle it.

We wouldn't be, I mean, look, we're already getting excited and they're just out for a cafe brunch. Imagine, you know. I've already submitted a proposal to the Prime Minister to change Stewart Island to Rita Ora Island. That's in the works, guys.

I would be in favour of that for sure. Guys, we need to be, we need to keep New Zealand, make it on our best behaviour when Rita Orr is here. Put on a facade smile away boys, smile away. I know I'm forward thinking here but imagine how good looking their children would

be. That would make some beautiful children. Yeah, no we really, I mean they've been dating for a month and now we're already talking about her uterus and what great children she could pump out. And Jennifer Lawrence, she obviously, you know her from The Hunger Games. She kind of made her debut being on The Hunger Games. Really successful actress.

Now, she learnt about Bennifer, so Ben Affleck and J-Lo reuniting while recording a podcast. And that podcast episode is now out. And this was breaking news in the middle of the podcast. Breaking, breaking, breaking, breaking news. Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck are back together. They're on vacation. They are on vacation with each other right now. Bye, guys.

Shut the f*** up. Is that a reputable news source or do we have to say allegedly? No, it's pretty reputable. Okay, so. I'm so excited. I'm so happy for them. I feel like we've just listened to a secret recording of producer Juliette and her friends. Yeah, I feel like that wasn't Jennifer Lawrence.

Shut the fuck up. That was close. I thought you were going to. I was terrified for a second there. That was close. I thought you were going to... Pulled out there just in the best time. I was terrified for a second there. But yeah, she probably had a very similar reaction to the rest of the world when they found out about Ben Affleck. She seems to... She doesn't seem to be too Hollywood.

She's kind of swept up in the fact that she's in amongst all these people. Yeah. When she's on the red carpet and stuff, she's like... She's like, there's George Clooney. That would be me if I was famous. I'd be like,

oh my God, it's Harry Styles. I touched his hair. Yeah. Never washing my hand again. No, I'm kidding. Well done. You know,

you should wash your hands. Yeah. Especially now there's a pandemic. 20 seconds. You need to wash your hands for 20 seconds, even if you have touched Harry Styles. And that is Spy from where you can enter the hits.co.nz.

Thank you, Ju. Paid to talk words and stuff into a microphone. It's New Zealand's breakfast. Jono and Ben on the hits. We've got to talk about the Friends reunion isn't there. Now, what's that going to be on? It says HBO Max in the US, but I'm not quite sure what that means for New Zealand. Yeah, I don't know if you're watching New Zealand.

I'm sure they'll announce that at some stage. 27th is out anyway, huh? And this is going to lead into where I have a little bit of a bugbear with the current viewing systems that we all have at the moment. You've got HBO Max, which I'd never heard of. That's the new one to the party. Skygo, TVNZ On Demand, Neon, Disney Plus, Disney Minus, Netflix, Apple TV, Pornhub, so many choices.

So many, too many streaming choices and too many TV shows. There's so many shows out there. I hear Ben come into work he's like, oh the Queen's Gurgler, you've got to watch that movie and well, got to watch that show. You're across all these shows and I'm like, the to-do

list of programmes that you need to watch now, it's anxiety causing. There's a lot. You do spend a lot of your time just sort of going, getting to a streaming service and then spending your time looking for something to watch on it. Yeah. The boss told us, you've got to watch Schitt's Creek,

you've got to watch Ozark, you've got to watch all this stuff. Everyone comes in every day. And because everyone's so passionate about what they're watching that they always offer the suggestions, but they're just starting to it's like chores in my house, they're just starting to pile up and soon I'll just be living in a cesspit, much like my property

Because traditional TV back in the day, you know, which is still around it's still going strong. Oh, network TV I like it when network TV told me what time I was watching something. And yes, you will enjoy three minutes of commercials in between the parts. Yeah, but you know, you're watching it. We keep it on and we keep watching it.

Shove me some fair-going country calendar on at 7.30 and then I'll wait to watch it because I think too many choices can confuse it. It's like when you go into an empty car park and you never know which car park to take. Oh, yeah. Same thing. Yeah, you're right. Whether it's just one, you're like, well, this is it. This is the one I've got to take.

So I'd like you to stop suggesting shows for me. Okay. Because it's causing me stress. And you don't want to stress out. It sounds stressed out. It does stress. Yeah, very stressed. Juliet, you just say, yeah, you'll get around to watching that.

You never watch anything. Yeah, I never do. Well, I always think, I'm like, how do people find the time to watch TV shows? I feel like my life is so busy but then, I don't know. People probably watch it before they go to sleep but then I'm going to sleep so early.

Before a sleep thing, watch in bed and watch an episode or something or, you know, that's probably the TV watching time. I have to add it to my to-do list to watch an episode of The Crown that I've just started. If I want to get it, if I want to make through The Crown and commit to it I actually have to add If I want to get it, if I want to make it through The Crown and commit to it,

I actually have to add it to my to-do list. You know, for an hour, sit down and watch an episode of The Crown. Well, the good thing about The Crown is you know what happens in that series. Oh, that's true. It's going to get a bit shaky over these last couple of years.

But I think I mentioned it before, my friend was like, remember it all moan about Sky Television? Oh, Sky this, Sky that. But how much are you all paying for multiple streaming services now? Oh, especially with the sports stuff. It'll be more. Yeah, you're right.

It was all on one thing. It was all conveniently there. We had it. We all handed our Dakotas back and we were laughing. Yeah, we all went at it. They said, well, now I'm getting NBA League pass. I'm trying to get Sky to go for a week to watch the Warriors. It's all like, yeah.

Just need to streamline it all, guys. Spark, spark. Take TV back to 1981. All right? When it's all like, yeah. Just need to streamline it all, guys. Yeah, sparks, oh jeez. Take TV back to 1981, alright, when it's shut off at 11 o'clock at night. Real Kiwi blokes with soy lattes.

Mmm. Shono and Ben, breakfast on the hits. Producer Juliet, no secret you're a big fan of Harry Potter. Yes. We had Matthew Loris

who was Neville Longbottom. We were going to get an interview with him last year on the show because he was in a movie with Rose Mudafio. And this was Juliet's reaction around the office. Apparently we're interviewing Matthew Lewis in like a couple weeks. He's Neville Longbottom from Harry Potter. It's my lifelong dream to meet someone who plays a character in Harry Potter.

Holy ****. Yeah, like anyone. Anyone. Anyone. Dobby. Like to the point where I almost bought a ticket to Armageddon

just so I could meet like Draco Malfoy Harry Potter so obsessed she's obsessed I love the way you say Harry Potter you know Juliet

you're in charge of the computer you could delete that at any moment because Ben's like have you got that thing you could just say oh no it's gone

it's been deleted you're good on you you're a great producer you're like yeah here it is I'll roast myself again but over the weekend we were in Christchurch, Jono and myself filming for this new TV show,

and we played. Boy, it was cold, wasn't it? It was colder than ignoring a call from your mother while in an ice bath in Antarctica. Particularly when the wind was up on a Friday. But anyway, I feel like you can't complain because it's like you're in Auckland. As soon as you go in there, you go, oh, it's cold.

It's like you get used to it when you're down there. You don't say it out loud. You don't say it when you're down there when you're back you're in your safe place

you can say it was cold but we played Quidditch so they take part in New Zealand a lot of the

New Zealand Quidditch team are based in Christchurch and we had our first game of Quidditch there's an

actual team they go to the world champs so cool and they've made not the

New Zealand team but worldwide they've made a sport with all these rules and you know you've got to run around New Zealand team, but worldwide they've made a sport with all these rules and, you know, you've got to run around with a, well, I guess a broomstick.

It's like a plastic piping. You straddle a broomstick between your legs and then finally, I always go to bed, is that a broomstick in your pants? Are you happy to see me? But finally on Saturday, it was actually just a broomstick. So you've got to run around. It's a really fun sport to play.

You're just running the whole time trying to get the quaffle or the ball between three sort of I guess they're called almost like hula hoops they're up on these sort of sticks that you have to get through. Because unfortunately due to a lack of magic we couldn't fly. Oh, that's not disappointing.

It's exhausting. Harry Potter's not putting in that cardio work. That's what I was thinking. No, yeah, they're not actually getting that fit when they're on the broomsticks, are they? No, the broom's doing the heavy lifting. So you have your sort of keeper and you have your seekers and then you have the beaters who go around almost like dodgeball and throwing little plastic balls at other players.

And then when you get hit, you have to run back and touch the hoops and come back again. And then with two minutes to go, they introduce the snitch. Yeah, so how does the snitch work? And it's like it's a game within a game. It's already a very confusing format, but just to confuse it even more, so how does the snitch work? And it's like it's a game within a game. It's already a very confusing format but just to confuse it

even more, they have a game, they add another game on while the other game continues on. Right. So only two players, one from each team,

so we got to be the people that could go for the snitch and then the snitch can just run anywhere, like out of the, around building, around the footpath, around the roads.

So it's a person. Yeah, it's a person, sorry, yeah, it's a person dressed in yellow and they have like a yellow sock with like a tennis ball on the back

just hanging from their pants so you've got to grab that away it looks like a bum scrotum doesn't it it's dangling in the back if you grab that

you win oh wow and so in the game and that's well it's extra 30 points so you pretty much win the game but the snitch was

he was running all through bus stops outside on the footpath so it literally runs off the pitch through But the snitch was, he was running all through bus stops outside on the footpath. So he literally runs off the pitch. Through restaurants. I was saying overseas, people got into Ubers and stuff so I think they've reined it in

to like, you've got to stay in the area because otherwise, That is so good. Yeah. Now Ben's on some sort of meaningless crusade to get it quitted

and set it into the school curriculum. I think they should. I think, you know, you think about kids, mainly, you know, nine to 12 years old, you know. They'd love it. Primary school, intermediate kids,, 9 to 12 years old. They'd love it.

Primary school, intermediate kids, they'd love it. They would love it. His passion is very passionate about this. Oh, don't worry, I'm the same. Who's the education minister? Chris Hipkins. The hippo. Is it the hippo? Get in touch with the hippo.

Let's start a petition. Get it in the schools. We'll call the hippo later on today and see if he's interested. Get Quidditch in school. I reckon they'd love it because, you know, it's a good cardiovascular exercise. A lot of fun. Kids love Harry Potter at that age. You could be, you know, those people that go around

visiting the schools and the Quidditch fan, you're like, introduce, hey, guys, it's all-blue Quidditch. Here we go, guys. You could be one of those people travelling all around the country. Oh, yeah, well, we could. I'd like someone else to pick up, you know,

pick up the quaffle and run with it. Oh, you're the ideas guy I've been getting catapulted from time to time but I just think the concept's there, there's a great sport and kids would like it It was very fun, and the New Zealand Quidditch team a very small pool of players so basically if you swing by Bunnings

and pick up a broomstick, you're in the team by default I think we're now representing New Zealand We're now on the New Zealand Quidditch team Broadcasting live and mostly awake Jono're now representing New Zealand. We're now the New Zealand Quidditch team. Broadcasting live and mostly awake. Jono and Ben, New Zealand's breakfast. On the hits. Scrolling through your feed. Like an insomniac,

the news never sleeps, does it? It's never just taken a day off the news and you know what? I'll have some me time. It's very hard to catch up if you're binge watching. And a man who also never sleeps because he's across the news, Ben Boyce. What's been happening? Well, in the UK, obviously things are slowly starting to open up again

after quite a massive lockdown. And there's a lot of pubs in the UK. Sorry, you're pointing? You're pointing, you're right. Oh, you played me a funny video yesterday and it reminded me that we must play that later on. Oh, I couldn't find it. Can you not find it?

Oh, there's this video of TV. This elderly lady, like 94. that later on. Oh, I couldn't find it. Can you not find it? Oh, there's this video of TV. This elderly lady, like 94, she hasn't seen her sister in a year. Because they're locked out obviously, yeah. And obviously the TV crew

are like, well this is going to be a wonderful reunion moment. Uh-oh. And so they were like, yeah, they were talking to the lady like, you're excited to see your sister?

She says, yeah, I'm very excited. And they turn up with TV cameras at their house. And she hobbles in, she's got to hunch back sister? She says, yeah, I'm very excited. And they turn up with TV cameras at the house. And she hobbles in. She's got to hunch back the poor thing. Her sister's obviously elderly as well. They haven't seen each other for over a year.

She opens up the door, sees her sister, sees the film crew, and she's like, I told you you need to call me before you come over. Got all salty in her. That's the first thing she says.

I told you to call me. Before you come over. That is so savage. But fair enough. I mean you to call me. Before you come over. That is so savage. But fair enough. I mean, no one likes someone coming over after a year. Even if it is your sister you ever see. And the film crew as well, you're like. Now I've probably got to feed them.

No, no. Tidy it up. You want to come on in. But yeah, the UK, so things are starting to open up again slowly. And so I reckon over 2,000 pubs have been forced to close permanently, which is really sad over there. So they've done some sort of numbers to how to boost the, I guess, the pub industry in the UK to give it a £25 billion boost.

And so they reckon everyone in the UK needs to drink over summer 124 pints over summer or 122 glasses of wine if you're into that. So that's what you need to do and there's a bit of a campaign over there to help your country go to the pubs and drink over summer, 124 pints. And then they'll deal

with the health effects of that later in the year. Booze isn't your thing though. They have broke things down. You could get 976 packets of potato chips or 400 roast dinners from the bar over summer.

So those are the stats and there's a bit of a campaign going over there to get back to the pubs. So they're essentially saying get out there and binge drink. Yeah, exactly. Wonderful message. Take up smoking too while you're out there. The old tobacco industry's hurting as well. The Brits are the biggest drinkers in the world. On average,

every person in Britain has 527 pints a year. Oh, really? A year. Oh, so that 124 is actually pretty good. But that's only over a month, though, is it? No, it's summer, they say. So that may be three months.

So that's, yeah. They could do that. That's easy. It's easy. You could double it. And that is scrolling through your feed this morning. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime.

Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. The Google Game. Fun little game we like to play on the show. We give us a call. Oh, Andrew, that hits you. Ask us a question, and we frantically try and Google the answer in 10 seconds. If we can't Google it, you'll win this morning a $200 online voucher for TradeDepot.co.nz. You can upgrade your bathroom, kitchen and laundry

with appliances online. They've got baths. They've got stuff for the washing machines. They've got everything including the kitchen sink

actually. Everything is on there on tradedepot.co.nz They've got stuff for the washing machines. Did I say stuff for the washing machines? Sorry,

for the laundry. They've got stuff for the washing machines. They probably have got stuff for the washing machines. Yeah, just another vague. Ovens, cooktops, refrigerator, they've got stuff for the washing machine they probably have got stuff for the washing machine yeah just some other very good ovens, cooktops

refrigerator they've got it all you don't need me to drill down on the details just go to tradedepot.co.nz stuff for the washing machine so you ask us a question

if we can't get the answer in 10 seconds on the internet on Google then you win and I tell you what Ben Bush you're going to be on for me

he's had me massaging his fingers individually during that pink song. It was weird, but his fingers are all limbered up and warm on this cold morning. Well, welcome in from Christchurch, Tanya. Tanya, how are you? Good, thanks. How are you?

Oh, good. Lovely to hear you. You're in your dulcet tones. Cold this morning in Chichar? Yes, it is. It's not cold in the lounge, though. I've got the heat pump going. It's nice and warm. Oh, just pumping out that 22 degree heat. Love it. It's not cold in the lounge, though. I've got the heat pump going. It's nice and warm. Oh, just pumping out that 22-degree heat.

Love it. That's right. We stayed in a motel over the weekend in Christchurch, and I left the air con on 23 degrees, and I woke up at 3 o'clock. Oh, yeah, clutch. Really, really thirsty. Oh, my mouth is like the Sahara Desert.

Yeah. Just yearning for a drip of moisture. All right, we'll get into it. What's your question? Ben, you can do the Googling here. Okay. Why is a dog's nose wet? Why is a dog's nose wet?

You think I like to delay these things, don't you? Yes, you do, because you don't want people to lose. I like to take my time because I want people to come up with the answer. Well, that's not the case. Oh, I couldn't get there this morning. Nice. What's the point of the game? Well, that's not the... Oh, I couldn't get there this morning. Nice. What's the point of the game? What is the point of the game?

Should we make the time of five seconds? Why do we play it? Why do we play it if he's just going to give away the prizes? So there's a thin layer of mucus that clings to the nostrils, enhancing the absorption of scent chemicals and improving the dog's ability to smell,

but I didn't get there in 10 seconds. Oh, because you spent... Oh, that's great. You spent seven of them saying how you think I'd give you... So, why don't we just phone up? Hey, Tanya, you won a voucher.

Well done. Why don't we change the... Oh, thank you. Change the to win a voucher game. You just phone up if you won a voucher, we just give you one. All right, well, you want to have a go

or you give up? Okay, Nicole. Okay, Nicole, you're probably not going to win because Jono's very competitive. Nicole, what's your question? Good morning. What year or month and year was the DVD introduced?

Oh, the DVD month and year? DVD month, year, introduced. It was 1997. You'll find the digital video disc. What month? It was March. Oh, after the timer, I'm sorry. Well, you were.

You didn't get... Nicole. You told us what the digital DVD was or whatever it was. You win a Trade Depot voucher with a technicality. Oh, awesome. I'd love to buy a drive. That's great. Thank you.

There you go. Stuff for the laundry stuff. All the washing machine stuff. You got it on your cold. We'll take to buy a drive. That's great. Thank you. There you go. Stuff for the laundry stuff. All the washing machine stuff. You got on your cold. We'll take one more, James. Juliet, you can do the Googling here. You're a neutral party. Okay. What's your question for Juju, James? Hi there. If every Toyota Corolla was put end-to-end, ever made,

how many times would it go around the earth? Oh, my God. Toyota Corolla end-to-end around the world. Oh, gosh. I panicked Googling. That's not even on Google. Hold on. Have you found a question that's not even on the internet?

No, it is. If you Google how many Toyota Corollas have ever been made, you'll find approximately 44.1 million. And underneath that, on the Toyota website, it says they will go around the world 4.1 times if they were placed end-to-end. Wow. That is a piece of information that would generally serve you

no purpose in life until right now, James. Wow. Well done. $200 Trade Depot voucher coming your way. We really cracked up a huge bill on Trade Depot. We just gave away $600 worth of Trade Depot vouchers. I feel like it was a little too much. But anyway.

Oh, she's the guy who wasted seven seconds at the beginning. I just thought we were going to do one person. I thought we were going to do three. I was like, oh, okay. Anyway, Trade Depot, one heck of a website to check about today. We probably won't be giving any more vouchers away from now until the rest of time. Add these two men together and somehow you'll get three quarters worth of a normal van. The Hits with Jono and Ben for breakfast.

Spy. Know what's up. Spy.co.nz. Hey, whose turn is it to wash the dishes this morning? Because producer Juliette is about to dish the dirt on the celebrities and those dirty dishes are going to need a finished dishwashing tablet. Come on in, Jew. So I'd like you to cast your mind back to January 2019

when a British family came on holiday in New Zealand and they were the unruly tourists that we all became obsessed with following. You may remember things like this. Oh, naughty little s***. Smell my yonkers. I'm not your friend now. Smell my yonkers again. Excuse me?

It's going to come. Oh, I loved the unruly British tourists. It was over summertime, wasn't it? It was. I felt like it was that slow news period that sometimes happens. It's the biggest news in New Zealand. That kid sounds like he's jacked up on Monster Energy drinks, that little five-year-old.

Honestly. He was amazing. He's pulling the fingers at the cameras and everything. Yeah, and so they littered on the beach. They stole things. They ripped people off. Swore like sailors. But they're going to be depicted in an opera musical show in New Zealand.

So the director of New Zealand Opera said that the show would primarily be a comedy and a big theatre production with the opera and the music really heightening the show about these British unruly tourists. So they're getting their own opera. Yeah. I loved we did the good old New Zealand thing and we

chased them out of town with our pitchforks didn't we? We weren't giving them an inch. They were just, it was so it was one of those stories that you just follow and follow and you hoped more would come out. What are they doing today? Oh they're in Te Ao Muru at a motel and they haven't paid properly.

And then journalists would go and follow them with cameras and microphones trying to get a rise out of them in a way. And there was priceless marketing for the Bunnings straw hat. Did you remember that? If you find a more offensive travelling family we'll beat them by And there was priceless marketing for the Bunnings straw hat. Did you remember that? I've never had a straw hat on. Look at us. If you find a more offensive travelling family, we'll beat them by 15%.

Yeah, true. So they're hoping that the opera musical will be in theatres by February next year. So that's a work in progress at the moment. Well, everyone's going to go along and go, oh, yeah, I kind of remember that news story. I guess I'll go and see the opera. So you're saying the promise of the orchestra is doing it. New Zealand opera.

Oh, New Zealand opera. Like, it's quite a prestigious sort of thing. I know, I know, I know. It's quite... Okay, yeah. What's the word? Not juxtaposition? Oxymoron?

It wouldn't be a traditional thing that they would do. No. Yeah, you're right. No. What did you say to my effing uncle? Well, I think that's probably part of it because they say it's going to be a comedy and so maybe it's probably part of the comedic aspect.

And Prince Harry was recently on Dax Shepard's podcast. Dax Shepard, he's married to Kristen Bell. Got a podcast, a really big one, called Armchair Expert. And he compared the royal life to being in The Truman Show, which that movie that Jim carries in, mixed with being in a zoo, which was quite interesting. And then he also talked about back in the early days of meeting Meghan Markle, one of their early dates was this.

The first time that Meghan and I met up for her to come and stay with me, we met up in a supermarket in London, pretending that we didn't know each other. So we texted each other from the other side of the clock. There were people looking at me, giving me all these weird looks and coming up and saying hi, whatever. And I was there texting, saying, is this the right one?

She goes, no, you want parchment paper. I'm like, okay, where's the parchment paper? So that's what they were trying to do. Sounds like some weird role player a married couple do to try and reignite their relationship. Unusual places are both very, well, particularly Harry was very famous, but they were both famous. I think it was probably like if they were seen in the supermarket together, it would have looked like they

just bumped into each other and that they were old friends maybe. This was way early when I don't think people knew they were dating. Why didn't they just go to some seedy motel? I don't know. They probably did too. Maybe they did that as well. It seems like a very public place to meet.

Parchment paper too, is just for you wondering, because I was, it's more a baking paper. Oh, yes, true. That's what parchment paper is. Oh, yes, it'd be in like the Gladwrap aisle, if they still sell Gladwrap. Yeah, it's a baking paper. Unusual thing to do in the aisle to meet, maybe a quieter aisle. I was listening to you load that in before and Prince Harry said he's got very used to having a baseball cap on and walking with his head down

and just staring at the footpath when he's walking. And he says there's a lot of gum on the footpath. You've never realised how much gum is stuck on the footpath. And also conducive to walking into power poles as well. You want to keep your wits about you when you're... Yeah. When you're Prince Harry and walking, looking down. And that is Spy for More.

You can head to thehits.co.nz. Yeah, yeah, nah. Yeah. Nah. Yeah, nah. The home of yeah, nah. She'll be right. And at the end of the day.

Jono and Ben. Breakfast on the Hits. Wrapping up our show. Feeling good. We need to get a new song. This one's past it, mate. The TikTok kids aren't listening to this now. No, you're right.

Get a more applicable song or else we're going to seem out of touch, out of date. All right, Producer Juliet. All right, I'll work on that. Yeah. Well, thank you very much Get a more applicable song or else we're going to seem out of touch, out of date. All right, producer Juliette, let's get a look on that one. Yeah, well, thank you very much, Juliette, for keeping us young, pulling down the average age of this program, keeping us in touch with the youth. All right, why's it going to be a good day? We'll end the show on a good note, shall we? And we'll kick it off with Tanya in Auckland. How are you, Tanya?

Hi, I'm good. How are you? Bloody good to hear your voice. We're doing well on a Monday. Why's it going to be a good one for you? Well, I injured my leg a week ago, but today I get to go for an ultrasound and see just Bloody good to hear your voice. We're doing well on a Monday. Why was it going to be a good one for you? Oh, that sounds fun. What did you do to your leg? Oh, that's funny. And as I stepped out of the house, something snapped in the back of my car. Oh, that's funny.

All the kids are like, why is the unicorn swearing on the ground, rolling around? Nah, this unicorn had a gangster limp. A gangster limp. It was a gangster unicorn. Nothing better than injuring yourself in costume, is there? Exactly. Nah, well, I hope your leg's okay. I hope the ultrasound goes all right.

Thank you. We're going to send you out some hell pizza, all right? Fantastic. Have a great Monday. Appreciate your call. You've got a rich history of comedy costumes. Have you ever injured yourself on a costume, Ben? I don't think I have off the top of my head.

Oh, I remember a time I was in a tackling bag costume. Funny you mention. And Ben put all the entire Auckland Blues rugby team up against me to tackle me and broke my collarbone, Juliet. Did you break your collarbone? I haven't told you this before. Oh, you've heard this story. I never, no, I knew that

that happened. Yeah, I haven't seen you ever do this story. But I didn't realise the collarbone. It wasn't like it was the Crusaders, you know, like, yeah.

I can't believe I haven't told you that story. Oh, wow. Yeah, no, I've let it go. I'm past it now. Are you? It's fine.

We'll go to Carl. How's Nelson this morning, Carl? How are we doing, team? Oh, we're doing really well, mate. Lovely to have you on the show with us. Why is it going to be a good day at the top of the South Island? It's going to be a good day at the top of the South Island because it's my birthday and I pulled a sticky at work

and it's raining and it's wet and it's cold. And because I can. Now, the flaw in your plan is you're on the radio right now saying you pulled a sticky, Carl. I already told my boss last week that I was doing it today. Oh, okay. Oh, that's good. That's good.

Just so you know, boss, I'm going to be very sick on Monday. Hey, happy birthday, Carl, and we're going to give you some hell pizza. You're a gem. Thanks, guys. No worries. Have a great day. Let's start trying squeezing one more, shall we? Hey, Jules.

Hello. Mordena from Christchurch. Jules, how are you going this morning? I'm really good, thank you. Why is it going to be a good day for you, J Money? Because I am going to treat Monday like a Friday and put all my excitement into it so it can't be bad. Oh, you're going to mind trick yourself into thinking it's a Friday.

Isn't it interesting how the days of the week dictate your mood? Like, turning up to work on a Monday is like a funeral, and then Friday's like your 21st birthday again, isn't it? I reckon Tuesday's probably the fuckiest day. Yeah. I think a Tuesday's like Monday, you're like, oh, it's the start of the week, and you can kind of feel fresh. Tuesday, you're kind of dragging your knuckles.

Wednesday's hump day. Thursday's nearly Friday, And Friday is Friday. There's some filler days in between Monday and Friday. But then I always think there's people that don't work your traditional Monday and Friday. So they're all, you know, every time we're like, oh, it's, you know. Sometimes weekends are on other days for some people. No, listen, we have really deep dived into the structure of the week. Jules, now someone's messaging in our ears, Jules.

Are you, Jules, the car alarm lady who can make a car alarm noise with your voice? I am. I am that woman. Oh, please. This is going to end. We wanted to end the show on a high, and this is going to do it. This is New Zealand's Got Talent. Jules, take it away with your mouth car alarm. Okay, hold on. Hold on.

I love this so much. We've made you do this a couple of times it brings me an unreasonable amount of joy the highlight of my show of the show every time you do it it is so awesome we've only got 20 more seconds of the show and I'd like you to do it for 20 seconds until this program finishes

we're going to give you some help. Okay, hold on. Thank you. Hold on. Take it away. You keep going. What more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from sex on The Hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast.

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