Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - November 25 - The Wild Twins, NZ's Most Organised Christmas Shoppers, Big News Small Town
Episode Date: November 24, 2020How would you feel being in the ocean, trying to catch your own fish for dinner, surrounded by hungry sharks who are also after the same fish? And on top of that, being naked and being filmed for a TV... show? Horrifying, we know. The Wild Twins Amber and Serena are two Kiwis who have once featured on a previous edition of Naked and Afraid (set in Africa where they had to hunt their own food, while constantly being preyed on by big African cats...), and now they're on Naked and Afraid of Sharks! It was super interesting chatting to them about how they fought off the sharks and what the biggest challenges were. Was it being naked on TV or trying to survive in shark-infested waters? Jono also shared a funny story about his daughter Poppy who got a bit confused when referring to the male anatomy... On top of this, Ben's kids started a wild rumour about him and the types of movies he's watching. Shark content, kid content, ALL THE CONTENT for you on this fine Wednesday!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
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Jono and Ben, new to your mornings.
Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco.
Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh.
Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben,
you can have them anywhere, anytime.
Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast.
Gotcha.
Oh, the podcast, the surprise entry to the podcast.
No, you're a bit ready today, though.
I was, I was waiting for you to,
but the thing is you, you pushed the buttons to start the podcast. No, you were a bit ready today though. I was. I was waiting for you to but the thing is you
push the buttons to start the podcast so I don't
know when you've officially pushed the buttons.
What I like to do is I wait five minutes and wait
until you deepen your emails and I'm like boom, there we go.
Catch him off guard. Tomorrow I'm
going to try and just go welcome to the podcast and see
if I time it correctly or not. I might not.
Nothing like a podcast that starts with the element
of surprise for the host.
Oh, we're on.
They weren't really that prepared for something they do every day.
But anyway, welcome to the podcast.
I'm chewing some airwaves at the moment.
Classic Wrigley's airwaves designed for the 70 to 80 year old demograph.
Love me an airwaves.
What's your chewing gum of choice?
I go for that.
It's like the bubble.
It's the bubble mint flavor.
Sugar free.
It's good.
Oh, yeah.
Wrigley's.
Extra. Extra. Extra. Yeah, extra. The bubble mint. Oh yeah. I like it. At least. Extra.
Extra.
Extra.
Yeah.
The bubble mint.
Me chewing gum drives Jennifer, my wife, bonkers.
Why is that?
She says, you sound like a cow.
Oh yeah.
Because I'm always like, oh you put the whole pack.
You just keep adding.
Instead of getting rid of it, you just add more and more.
Yeah.
So it turns into a giant ball inside my mouth.
Almost like something Willy Wonka would create.
Yeah.
Yeah. He was onto a great little invention, wasn't he, Wonka,
with the chewing gum that tasted like a meal?
Remember it started as a rhyme?
Yeah, yeah.
That would be a good idea, wouldn't it?
No one really followed through with that, did they?
Who was chewing it?
Which of the cast was chewing it?
And she was just loving that meal.
The rich one.
Was it the rich lady?
The daughter of the...
Yeah, maybe, maybe. I'm not sure. I'm sorry, lady? The daughter of the... Yeah, maybe.
Maybe.
I'm not sure.
I'm sorry.
My knowledge of Roald Dahl books...
Who ate Wonka's gum in the movie?
Let's have a look here.
There was like a Vanka, but I think that's Donald Trump's...
Violet blew up.
Violet blew up like a bloody balloon.
She floated up to the ceiling.
A whole lot of stuff happened to the kids, right?
Mate, if you had a factory and children were going missing.
Surely a lot of questions asked after that.
Where were the authorities?
How was that factory tour that everyone wanted to win?
Well, literally nine out of ten of them went missing.
They disappeared.
No one's ever heard from them again.
Yeah, but go, Charlie's got the factory now, so that's all good.
Didn't Charlie get the factory?
Charlie got given the factory, yeah.
So maybe that was Wonka going, oh, God, stuff's gone down.
He owns the factory now.
It's all this kid's fault.
Yeah.
If it weren't for the kid, those other kids wouldn't have gone missing.
No one ever asked Wonka any of the hard questions.
He's like, recent reading.
Valerie Bograde was the one who ate the chewing gum.
And she blew up after eating the blueberry pie for dessert,
the chewing gum flavour.
It was too much for her.
Too much. And then so Wonka was like, uh-oh, we hadn't quite eating the blueberry pie for dessert, the chewing gum flavour. It was too much for her. Too much.
And then so Wonka was like, uh-oh, we hadn't quite nailed the blueberry pie.
And so she blew up and floated up into the ceiling fan.
Is Roald Dahl still alive?
No, no, sadly not anymore.
R.I.P.
Yeah.
Great author.
Wonderful author.
Prolific author.
Yeah.
So today on the podcast.
What a shout out for Roald Dahl.
Oh, he was bloody great.
He was. He was, yeah. As a kid, jeez. Well, okay, so let's the podcast. What a shout out for Roald Dahl. Oh, he was bloody great. He was.
He was, yeah.
As a kid, jeez.
Well, okay, so let's go one for one.
How many Roald Dahl books can you name?
Oh, jeez.
Okay.
Uh, the Twits.
Oh, I was going to say that.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
Charlie and the-
Are you Googling?
No.
Are you Googling?
You're looking at your computer screen.
You're Googling.
I'm reading the Herald.
I'm reading the Herald. Show me. Yeah. Show me. BFG. You're Googling. I'm reading the Herald. I'm reading the Herald.
Show me.
Yeah.
Show me.
BFG.
You're not showing me.
No, no.
BFG.
You're out.
James and the Giant Peach.
No, you're reading off
a computer screen.
I'll rattle off these books.
You tell me if you read them.
Charlie.
Yeah, as a kid.
Matilda.
Yeah, as a kid.
Great, good movie too.
And there was a wonderful
stage play Matilda
that came to New Zealand.
There was.
And the kids that were Matilda, well, the one, she was amazing.
Yep.
The Witches.
That was a terrifying movie.
There's a new movie coming out of The Witches this year.
So, yeah.
James and the Giant Peach.
Loved it.
No, that's a good one, yep.
The Twits.
Yeah.
That's good.
I didn't read The Sleek at Mr. Todd.
No, no, no, no.
Boy?
Yeah, I think I did read that one.
That was more about his life from memory.
Yeah, Roald Dahl.
Geordie's Minion Medicine?
George's Marvelous Medicine?
Oh, Geordie's Minging Medicine.
Maybe it's been brought into 2020.
Oh, yeah, George's Marvelous Medicine.
That was a good one.
Danny the Champion of the World?
I think that was...
Oh, I think... Yeah, I vaguely remember that one. I think that was, oh, I think, yeah,
vaguely remember that one. I think it was, they were
hunting pheasants and stuff like that.
SEO Trot. I remember that one.
I don't remember that. And it was something backwards, but I
can't remember what, that's a spoiler. Oh,
Tortoise backwards. Oh, okay. And it's about
the tortoise. Oh, okay. There's a tortoise on the cover
and I couldn't remember. There we go.
The Enormous Crocodile. Oh, yeah,
that was good, yeah. The Magic Finger. Oh, yeah, that was good.
Yeah.
The Magic Finger.
No, I don't.
Oh, no, that's not a Roald Dahl book.
That's a movie that just popped up, a recommended film for me.
Jeez, he's got so many.
I know.
They just keep going. Can't test him with the fox you haven't done.
Yeah.
I was trying to think of some more.
Wow.
Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator was like the sequel to Charlie
when he went through his court case with the kids.
That's right.
They got missing.
We need to get out of here.
We have to leave planet Earth.
This is the only way I can avoid these charges.
Yeah, so what's the point of this?
I don't know.
Oh, podcast.
Yeah, so here it is.
Enjoy the podcast.
What have we got on the show today?
We've got the Wild Twins today on the show.
Kiwi identical twins who have been on this just incredible show for Discovery Network.
Filmed overseas.
They basically lived on an island surrounded by sharks and had to survive also while naked.
Which seems like an unusual plot line.
Roald Dahl couldn't even come up with a plot line as good as that.
But they talked to them.
Very interesting chat with them.
The radio version of Morning Breath.
It's Jono and Ben on the hits.
Now, it's Shark Week on Discovery Channel on the network all around the world.
And Amber and Serena, they're known as the Wild Twins.
They're from New Zealand.
I love the Wild Twins.
It makes them sound like a crazy European DJ dance duo.
The Wild Twins coming to Rhythm and Vines.
And the Wild Twins have been on a big international show on
Discovery's Shark Week. It's called
Naked and Afraid of Sharks 2.
Each team will have to survive on two separate
islands five miles apart. With
minimal resources on land, they'll be
forced to venture into the water to compete with
sharks for food. And they'll have
to do it completely naked.
No? It feels like a pretty bad word.
Every time he says that, it catches me by surprise.
I'm good at what now?
I must have really caught the contestants by surprise as well.
And they join us in the studio, Amber and Serena the Wild Twins.
Great to have you here.
How's it going?
Good, thank you.
Can I do a test on you?
Because you guys are identical twins.
We play a game called synchronised answering.
Oh.
I want to see if it works.
So what we do is our producer, Juliet,
usually throws out a category like name a town in New Zealand
and we have to try and sync up our answers.
And I want to see if you guys as twins are in sync.
Yeah.
So you've got three seconds.
We'll go three, two, one, answer.
Is it just a one-word answer?
Yes, it works well.
He might say, like, a politician and you might go, just a little idea, answer. Is it just a one word answer? Yes, he might say like a politician
and you might go, just a little idea,
whatever you decide to put on your head.
Name for me a brand of car.
Toyota.
Oh no!
What?
What?
Hey, let's go another one.
This is freaky.
This is so freaky.
Okay.
Name for me an insect.
Spider.
Oh, God!
What?
Well, you and Jono and I, we've been playing this game a long time,
maybe twice we've synchronised the Natsa.
We just did it.
Wow, that's really amazing.
That's incredible.
Do you find you thinking about the same things at the same time?
Probably.
Yeah, we've definitely got the twin thing going on.
That's amazing.
Oh, that is incredible.
The soggy cornflakes of radio.
It's Jono and Ben on the hits.
Now, Amber and Serena, they're known as the Wild Twins,
identical twins from New Zealand.
They've been on a big international show for Shark Week on Discovery Network.
It's called Naked and Afraid of Sharks 2.
They basically tried to survive on a small strip of island
surrounded by sharks, doing it naked,
and some of the sharks sounded downright scary.
And the biggest threat to all local fishermen,
a legendary giant tiger shark called the Harpermaster.
Locking in at more than 25 feet and over 1,800 pounds,
it's been rumoured to rip propellers right off of fishing boats.
Jeez, that guy's got a magnificent voice, doesn't he?
He's almost as scary sounding as the sharks.
Yeah, I'd like him to narrate my life.
The Wild Twins are with us in the studio.
Not the first time you've been on a Discovery TV show.
Last time you were on a ridiculous show that put you out in the elements.
What was it all about? Where were you?
So the show's called Naked and Afraid
and it's a survival challenge.
So last time we done 21 days
in Africa, surviving
with nothing, not
even clothes except we got to choose one
survival item. What was your one
survival item you chose?
I had chosen a machete
and I had the bow and arrow.
Yeah, I would have chosen a nice, comfortable pair of clothes.
That would have been nice.
To fix the purpose of the show.
Make it in a break.
Yeah.
And so you spent this time in the African wilderness.
And I remember last time we spoke to you, there were hyenas circling you at night.
Yep, leopards.
You pretty much had to be on guard 24-7.
Elephants in the night.
There were rhinos.
There was just everything you can think of in Africa.
Scorpions when we were collecting firewood and stuff.
And they pretty much left you to it at night time, right?
You were just you guys alone with cameras in the middle of the African wilderness.
Yeah, completely left alone, yeah.
And of course we had to hunt for our food, which was a massive challenge,
especially when a lot of the time we were being hunted ourselves
by the animals.
And so you did it, because I remember you caught one animal
and you sort of survived off that for the whole three weeks, right?
Yeah, we got it in parlour and it was a nice big buck as well,
so that had a lot of meat on it and we ended up drying a whole lot of it,
making it into jerky.
But then that attracted other predators as well.
So anyway, you guys are crazy you did this show, and now you've signed up for another
show.
We filmed another show.
We did.
So tell us about this one.
This time it was completely different in that we were on Barren Island in the Atlantic,
so it was not far from the Bermuda Triangle.
Totally different challenge in that this time the predators were in the sea,
so it's a shark week special.
So it's called Naked and Afraid of Sharks.
Oh, yeah, do you have to be naked again?
I know, you're like, surely we can put some clothes on this time.
The shark's there, you know?
Was that a twist or you knew you had to be naked again?
We knew that.
You're like, do you guys just film anything with people fully clothed?
Are you afraid Discovery TV network are trying to kill you?
Has that ever crossed your mind?
Kind of looking that way.
They definitely made it very, very difficult on this one.
So the game is, from what we've seen on the trailer,
is there's two islands.
In the middle of Shark Alley.
Shark Alley.
Sounds like a great spot.
So what do you have to do from there?
Point on.
So you pretty much just have to survive.
So you've got no food.
The islands were very, very barren.
So you kind of have to go in the water to be able to get food.
But that's where the sharks are.
What?
Yeah.
And they're naked.
And so you had to go and catch fish and stuff in amongst hundreds and hundreds of sharks.
Yeah, yeah.
And then on top of that,
so obviously we were forced into the water a lot to get our food.
And then, of course, any time we managed to spare some food,
a struggling fish attracts sharks even more.
Oh, my goodness.
So the minute we'd got
something, we'd see the sharks
straight away and we'd have to get out of the water as quickly
as we could. 40 species of
sharks I heard on the promo that were
living in this shark alley.
I mean you must have seen hundreds and hundreds
of sharks while you were there. Yeah.
They're literally like everywhere.
The minute we went out there, we would just
see them swarming. They'd just come out of nowhere.
It was crazy.
And any close encounters?
There's quite a few.
Especially we had guys with us as well.
A few of them weren't too confident in the water,
so they would splash around and stuff in the panic of it.
It was very interesting with the sharks,
because you should not do that.
Oh, right.
Guys, stop splashing.
Stop splashing.
And we understand there was a shark
nicknamed the Harbour Master,
which is, how big is this shark?
Oh, it's huge.
It's a massive tiger shark,
which the locals, a lot of them,
won't go out in little boats
because it's such a big shark
that it actually rams the boats and stuff.
Rips propellers off the boats sometimes.
Yeah, yeah.
Definitely on our radar,
we're looking out for it the whole time.
25 feet long, I've just seen here.
Yeah.
25 feet and rips propellers off boats.
Did you know all this before signing up for the show?
Not really.
Oh, by the way, BTW, there's a big show.
Hey, while you guys are out there,
we've got this fun one called the Harbour Master.
Did anyone get bitten on this programme?
No, thankfully not.
They were pretty close encounters,
so we made spears out of sticks,
which any time the sharks got real close,
we put those in front of us,
so the sharks would actually bump into them
and then, thankfully, we do still have all our limbs.
Gee whiz.
We've got Amber and Serena Shine with us.
Stars of the New Naked and Afraid of Sharks 2
which is on Discovery 8.30 Sunday the 29th of November.
The guys, they have obviously naked bits and pieces
sort of dangling in the water.
Were they ever worried about those particular bits?
I'm sure they would have been.
I think they were very cautious.
So you can imagine like having a cloud of mosquitoes around you,
but imagine that, but being naked and on an island
where you just can't get away from it.
Like it was just unreal, whole body covered in bites.
Oh, really?
Oh, my gosh.
So do they give you anything?
Do you get any sunscreen or anything like that?
No, you don't.
And, like, even on the first night,
one of the guys went into shock,
anaphylactic shock from having so many bites all over him.
Mozzie bites?
Yeah.
Yeah, it was just bites on bites.
Surely.
You know, if I'm working on the crew,
I'm like, here, have some bloody Raid Mozzie repellent
or something.
Get some trail mix.
You know, you guys look hungry, you know.
That would be nice.
They just don't help you.
No, not at all.
I guess they're not allowed to.
Yeah, yeah.
Right.
Now, what's one bit of advice you can pass on to anyone
if they do find themselves stranded?
Don't panic.
Yeah.
That's the first thing I'd want to do.
Do it.
Do you get nude straight away or what's the...
Keep your clothes on. Keep your clothes on.
Keep your clothes on.
Keep your clothes on.
And it's surprising
how much when you start to really
look around and be resourceful
of how many things you can
find around the place to eat.
Well, I suppose you're just not looking out for it in everyday life.
Yeah, exactly.
Wow, so amazing things you guys are doing.
So I hope we see more of it in the future. Yeah, it's amazing. Wow, so amazing things you guys are doing so I hope we see more of it
in the future.
Yeah, yeah.
It's amazing.
Hey, well listen,
it's always lovely
to catch up with you guys
and no doubt
the next time we meet
is when we'll interview you
about the next time
Discovery's trying to kill you.
Cheers, thanks for having us.
The Wild Twins,
you can catch them this Sunday
on Discovery Network
right around the world.
Remember to double pump
the vogels.
It's Jono and Ben
on the hits.
There are times in life you know know where you get the the urge that you can't resist you just need to to scratch certain parts of your body that are attached to you you know do you have this
you're looking at me like you don't scratch don't pretend you don't scratch yeah on what occasion
though i mean it's oh i'm not talking about the communal kitchen here. I'm not walking up to a vet who's from accounts making a cup of coffee and scratching.
You know, I scratch in a private setting.
Okay, a private setting.
Not a public scratching.
Yeah, well, this is why I wasn't sure of the situation.
You're asking me.
I don't want to incriminate myself.
Private scratching?
This leads me to believe you're publicly scratched.
No, private., I'm private.
Scratching in private.
You could be scratching
under the desk right now.
I'm not.
Okay, hands are up.
All hands are up.
Juliet, no one's
scratching in here, okay?
It's a public setting.
But yeah,
so I was in a private
setting yesterday.
Scratchable conditions.
You're alone.
Don't think anyone else is here
so I had a scratch
okay
in walks my daughter
Poppy
lovely Poppy
she's like
Dad
stop
stop scratching your tentacles
and
this brought me great joy
this brought me great joy
because as a parent
you're like
well she's missing the mark here
but when do i tell it
like yeah yeah i almost want to let her go through you know five or six years thinking they are
tentacles and then have to publicly be in a session where she's having a conversation about
them and they're like tentacles you know that will bring me a lot of joy it's a long play as a parent
we had the same thing with the fridge at home there and we told indy our youngest daughter that
the fridge would it because the fridge beeps if you We told Indy, our youngest daughter, that the fridge would,
because the fridge beeps
if you leave the door open
and we were like,
oh, it explodes.
I don't know why we did that.
And she would rush
like an action hero
every time the fridge would go,
beep, beep, beep, beep.
She would be like,
the fridge, the fridge!
And run across the shower.
I was like,
oh, we're really going
to sit her down
because obviously
she'd get quite worried
that it's not going to explode.
The all new Fisher & Paykel
exploding fridge. It's a Fisher & Paykel exploding fridge.
It's a shocking
invention from the fridge manufacturers.
If you don't shut this up, it explodes.
Maybe it's a good one because you can't even
purchase a new fridge. You're like, wow, really?
What's the technology in that? So did you sit her down and tell her?
I hope you let her get into
her 20s and she's still chasing down.
That was the idea, but I was like, oh really?
She was getting a little bit worried every time the fridge turned into a thing.
The house was going to explode.
So I was like, maybe I'll tell her it's not.
Oh, well, yeah, and your other daughter, Sienna, as well,
she had a headache, didn't she?
Yes, yes, and she, much like Poppy, she got the word wrong.
So she was like, Dad, I've got a headache.
And I was like, oh, that's so good.
Whereabouts does it hurt?
And she was like pointing, she put her hands to the side of her head
and she's like, up here are my testicles.
See, but that makes you laugh.
You're like, I'm not going to correct you.
She's going for temples.
I know that's what she's going for.
But yeah, she hasn't quite nailed it.
But one day, she'll learn.
Why don't we both put our tentacles on the line here
and let them ride it out for 10 years or so.
And we won't tell them.
And we'll update you in a decade.
Okay, if the fridge doesn't explode and end us all,
then we'll come back and we'll have this conversation
in 10 years' time.
Serving bowls of loels for breakfast.
Actual loels may not be served.
It's Jono and Ben on the heads.
Now, it is one month till Christmas.
It's November 25 today.
And now, thank you.
Oh, the buble.
The buble comes out once a year like Santa, eh?
Wheel our buble out of the cupboard, blow the dust off,
blow off the buble and get him singing.
Now, of course, you've got to be pretty organised.
I was just reading today.
Now, today's the last day.
If you're posting something, if you've got friends and family
in places like South America or Africa, today's the last day
you can post to get there on time for Christmas.
And you've only got a few more days to get basically the standard post to Australia.
That's November 30.
And then other regions like North America, UK and Europe, November 27.
So you've got to be organised in that regard, sending Christmas presents overseas.
Well, thank you for the international postal information.
It was actually quite handy.
I thought it was quite interesting today.
All my African friends I need to send presents to, so I'm going to get onto that today.
Yeah, right now.
But there's people that aren't sending presents overseas.
No, but they're just disgustingly organised.
There are a group of New Zealanders
who just get their shopping done.
Before the 24th.
Before the madness on the 24th.
What are you doing?
Why are you not panicking and going to the mall on the 24th?
That's what I love.
I love personally
just leaving it
to the last minute
and experiencing the joy
of unnecessary panic
you're putting on yourself.
No, they won't.
I know they won't,
but I'm getting it anyway
because I'm at the mall
and I need to tick off a list.
So while we wanted
to open up this morning,
0800 the hits,
4487,
have you got
your Christmas shopping done?
There'll be people out there
who have
because they have a certain
air of arrogance about them
don't they
I ran into friends
mutual friends
that we both know
and they were in the mall
on the weekend
and they were like
yeah we're just going
Christmas shopping
I was like
Christmas shopping
yeah we thought
we'd get it done
yeah
and they rest
safe in the knowledge
that they're more organised
than the rest of us
I know
they laugh when everyone's going
there's no parking at the mall and all you get stressed out about that they're laughing they're sitting at home doing whatever they're more organised than the rest of us. I know. I know they laugh when everyone's going, there's no parking at the mall,
and all you get stressed out about that.
They're laughing.
They're sitting at home doing whatever they're doing,
but they're not shopping.
Juliet, you look like you'd be an organised shopper.
Oh, I'm actually not.
I'm horrendous.
I'm a Christmas Eve sort of shopper.
Are you a Christmas Eve?
Yeah, last minute panic.
You're a panic buyer, Ben?
Yeah.
I do like a list.
I do like a list,
and I like doing some stuff online
but then I do like,
I like wandering around the mall
and the Christmas music
and the decorations.
I like that.
I like that kind of, you know.
So yeah, I don't know.
It just helps me get
Oh, he said yesterday
he was a mall pest.
He just likes mall pests.
You're a mall pest.
I'm not a mall pest.
I just like wandering around the mall.
We never had malls in Marston
where I grew up
so a mall was a big novelty
for me coming to Auckland so I was like, oh yeah, I like wandering around the mall. We didn't have malls in Marston when I grew up, so a mall was a big novelty for me coming to Auckland,
so I was like,
oh yeah,
I like wandering around the mall.
So 800 of the hits.
Have you got your Christmas shopping done?
And we're talking about every present.
Extended family,
aunts,
uncles,
friends.
Have you ticked it off?
And we're going to try and see
how far back in the year
we can find someone
who had completed their Christmas shopping.
All right,
give us a call.
We might find you a prize as well
if you're the person who got organised the earliest,
the Christmas present shopping.
We're very disorganised, though.
You won't receive it until midway through 2021.
We'll go to the phones.
Have you got your Christmas shopping done?
We're going to see how far back in the year we can go to when you had it all knocked off.
We'll start from Tauranga.
Sam, welcome.
You're on New Zealand's Breakfast, mate.
How are you?
I'm good.
I'm good.
When did you get all your shopping done by, Sam?
I had it all done in October, but we sort of go back for July.
July?
What?
This is when you started.
Well, I send out a list of my businesses, and I say, hey, what are the kids' wants?
And I get them to send me a list, and then I get it all done and dusted.
It's all wrapped and it's all ready to go under the tree.
Oh, is it wrapped?
It is.
Oh my God.
Wow, Sam.
That's pretty organised.
I don't think we can beat Sam in July.
Although you create, you know, the stress that we all get to, you know, the majority
get to suffer through December, you create for yourself in July.
Yeah. But still, you're done. suffer through December. You create for yourself in July. Yeah.
But still, you're done.
You're done.
You're done.
Yeah.
Oh, gee, you must be sitting smugly under your Christmas tree at the moment, Sam.
It means that you don't have to worry about it.
Have you got your tree up?
Yeah.
Yeah, she got that done in June.
The tree was probably up in February.
Yeah.
Producer Humphrey was saying his mum hadn't taken down the tree from last year.
Yeah, that's right.
She's just written it out.
Yeah, just write it through.
There could be a Christmas at some stage.
Just Christmas somewhere.
Is that what they say?
No, no, they don't.
No, no.
Christmas is only one time of the year.
Oh, right.
Okay.
It's drinking.
It's five o'clock somewhere.
That's what they say.
Jade, welcome.
Your Christmas shopping's done and dusted?
Hi.
Yes, yes, it is.
I'm very much the same as Sam, and I was done in October,
but started planning in July.
Oh, my gosh.
What else do you do with your days?
Oh, I'm busy, but...
I'm a busy person.
Yeah, Christmas is always a priority,
and because my daughter's birthday's in July,
once that's done and dusted, I think,
okay, what can I get her for Christmas?
And then I start.
But the thing is, you know, people's present requirements
may change over a six-month period.
Yep, they may, but too bad because I've done it already.
Too bad.
John has gone from an 82 to a 77.
His pants are...
Oh, here we go.
He's fat-shaming me again.
Oh, no, the other way around.
He's gone for a...
Anyway.
Jade, do you fat-shame your colleagues?
No.
No, no.
I didn't think it was a dumb thing.
I was just saying,
the suit that you could wear a year ago
that I bought you,
you're like, oh, you've shrunk it.
You've shrunk it.
You know, just because we've got microphones
in front of our face
doesn't mean it doesn't hurt my feelings.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Doesn't mean you can't go to HR.
Sorry.
Yeah.
Anyway.
HR's all the way up the stairs, mate.
You won't go up there.
Now, Julie, you can go to the next
caller
apparently my fingers
are too chubby
to push the button
sorry
unnecessary
Catherine
sorry
let me just
eat this giant cake
before I get
talking to you
welcome Catherine
hi
how are you
oh jeez
these pants
they are killing me
alright Catherine
you got your shopping done
I have yes when did you get it done well Oh, Jesus, pants. They are killing me. All right, Catherine, you got your shopping done?
I have, yes.
When did you get it done?
Well, I start straight after Christmas.
I've got four little granddaughters who love pretty clothes. So whenever there's a sale on, I go and grab some clothes for them
and put them aside.
And then closer to Christmas Christmas I get them one big
present each. Oh my god, so
2019's
Christmas wrapped. You're on to
buying presents for this year.
No, not yet.
Not yet, no. After Christmas
I'll be on to that one. So yeah, as soon as Christmas is done you're on to the
next year. So you'll be looking at 2021
in about four weeks. Wow.
Gee whiz Catherine.
That is super organised.
I don't think we can
beat Catherine.
Well we can't.
I mean this is doing
Christmas shopping
all Christmas day
for the following year.
Or unless she's got
like a three year
ahead system.
That's the only way
you can beat Catherine.
You win.
You win Catherine.
And I'll tell you
who's not winning.
The tailor who has
to fix my pants.
I'm going to go
visit them after work
just so I can squeeze
my chubby little frame into these tight tight pants. Like'm going to go visit them after work just so I can squeeze my chubby little frame
into these tight, tight pants. Almost like
how a butcher puts whatever
meat they put in a sausage into the skin.
That's how I have to get into my pants every morning.
Alright, Catherine, we're going to send you out a prize.
You enjoy that.
Thank you so much for listening and being so
organised. It's very impressive.
Eggs for breakfast. It's Jono and Ben
on the hits. Now, I had a situation that happened yesterday.
You know when something happens and it's very innocent,
but someone else thinks it's not,
and then you over-explain the situation over and over again?
Oh, here we go.
Another episode of Ben pretends to do innocent things, but they are...
This happens to you a lot.
It does.
Almost the amount of times this has happened to you
has never happened to me in my entire life, once.
Okay, well, I'll be stitched up with my kids on this occasion.
Okay, so backstory.
It's not the dog, it's the kids.
Okay, so Palm Springs is the movie that's on Amazon Prime.
Well, I spoke to Kristen Milioti, who's in the movie, the actor,
the other day.
Remember, you were meant to be there, Jono, but you weren't.
We rang you.
Hello?
Hi, Jono, how are you?
Good. Who's this? This is Kristen, Jono. How are you? Good.
Who's this?
This is Kristen Milioti.
Just calling to say hi.
Oh, f***.
So you'd forgotten about the movie.
Anyway, so I did this interview, and before doing the interview,
I was like, I'd like to watch the movie.
It looks like a good movie on Amazon Prime.
And so my wife and I were like, yeah, let's watch the movie.
She thought it looked cool. So we went to watch it on a Saturday night and the kids are like, can we watch it too?
And I was like, well, no, it's
not really appropriate. I think it's rated R.
And they're like, why not?
And I said, it's a movie for adults.
So we put them in the lounge. They were
watching their own movie for the kids and then we went
and watched it on the laptop in the bedroom.
They're watching The Hunger Games or something, were they?
Yeah, I put it on something like that.
I think it was Saw 4, I think.
I've seen the first three Saw movies.
I was like, hey, you're 8 and 10, you can watch Saw 4.
Your classic family children's movies.
Love them.
So they were watching their movie in the lounge.
We were watching our movie on the laptop, The Palm Springs.
And anyway, I went to pick up the kids from their friends yesterday.
And they were like, you know when someone's a little bit smug
and wants to talk to you?
One of my friends was like, oh, so how was your Saturday night?
I'm like, it was all right.
Well, it was good.
Or how was the movie you watched?
I was like, oh, it was actually quite good.
I bet it was.
I was like, what?
You know when they kind of look at you like-
They know something.
How was your adult movie?
And I was like, oh, no, no, no.
It was a movie for adults.
And they're like, oh, was it?
Was it a movie for adults?
Because the kids just said, oh, mummy and daddy on Saturday night
watched an adult movie in the bedroom.
And we had to go and watch the entire Saw series next door.
I was like, no, no, it was a movie because it was R-rated.
It was for adults.
It was like an adult movie, not an adult movie,
if you know what I mean.
But you over-explained the situation.
And as I kept explaining it, and probably like I'm doing now,
everyone's like oh yeah.
Yeah I'm just like
when did you get to give up this facade?
I don't know.
I really don't know.
You put the kids in the other room.
You flicked on
you flicked on
Happy and Greasy Volume 7
and watched it.
No.
It was a good movie Palm Springs.
A movie for adults
not an adult movie.
But I know
isn't it
like the term adult movie
has really been stereotyped.
Whenever you hear it, you jump straight to those conclusions
where it could be all above board.
Well, it was.
Yeah, okay, fine.
It was.
It was fine.
You don't have to convince me, mate.
Whatever makes you sleep at night.
I wouldn't bring it up if it was.
Yeah, but sometimes you double down on it
to make it look like you were.
And you'd be like, oh, well, clearly he's so confident
you wouldn't talk about it on the radio.
So he mustn't have done it.
But then that means, well, maybe he's doing that as a smokescreen.
Oh, yeah.
There we go.
Oh, I mean, we go back to the undie theft of the neighbours.
Want more Jono and Ben?
You can catch up with the boys anytime.
Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook.
Hey, thanks for hanging out with us this morning.
My son came home yesterday from school and he's like,
oh, guess what we were discussing today in class.
And he's like, the teacher threw out there if animals could talk,
you know, which would be the rudest one?
So it was an open forum for conversation.
You know, if you were to pick an animal, you know,
what would be the rudest and what would be the politest?
You know, champagne pre-Christmas
filler content in the classroom.
Yeah, they've checked out a couple weeks earlier,
haven't they?
That's definitely thinking about the topic
as you're driving into Woo that morning.
That's pretty much how we prep for the radio show.
But, you know, they had a bit of a discussion.
Do you want to know what they landed on?
What would be the rudest animal?
I mean, you guys can have a guess what you think. You would chuck out there as the rudest animal. I'm going to go with a discussion. Do you want to know what they landed on? What would be the rudest animal? I mean, you guys can have a guess what you think.
You would chuck out
there as the rudest animal.
I'm going to go with a cat
only because cats
can be a little bit
of a standoffish,
a little bit aloof.
They feel like they're only
sort of the hot person
at school.
They sort of want to,
when they want to hang out,
on their terms,
they'll hang out with you
but they don't need
to hang out with you
all the time.
Yeah, but you're always
desperate to hang out
with them.
Like when they come to you,
yes, yes, yes,
I'll pet you.
Lick my fingers or whatever you do.
Yeah, but the cat.
So I'll go the cat.
I've got a cat and I love cats,
but yeah, I would go with that.
What about you, Jude?
I'm going to go monkey
just because they're cheeky as it is.
You know, they run around
and you see those photos of monkeys overseas
stealing people's hats and sunglasses
and things like that, you know?
So I was thinking monkey.
I'd put monkey as like,
lads, lads, lads on a stag do.
That's monkeys.
Lads, lads, lads going to Taupo or Queenstown on a stag do.
Yeah, gotcha.
Yeah, they're up to all sorts of nonsense.
Shenanigans, yeah.
They're here for a short time.
It's a big time.
High impact.
See, I said to him, well, like a goose or a swan, you know?
Oh, they can get quite aggressive. They can get quite aggressive. I mean, if they were, you know, those... Oh, they can get quite aggressive.
They can get quite aggressive.
I mean, if they were, you know, if we were dealing with them day to day,
they're definitely pushing in front of you at the Valentine's buffet, aren't they?
Yeah, totally.
And not apologising for it as well.
Yeah.
What do they go with?
Do you know what they landed on?
The wasp.
Oh.
The wasp.
But is it an animal?
Yeah, well, I guess it falls in the category, doesn't it?
Okay, insect, but all right.
You know, why are they there?
They're a nuisance. They're like a bee with a chip in the category, doesn't it? I don't like that insect, but all right. You know, why are they there? They're a nuisance.
They're like a bee with a chip on their shoulder, aren't they?
They're just there to stink.
No, what else is their purpose?
I don't actually know.
That's a good point.
I'm sure they have some sort of purpose in the world.
I did bring it up on Google just during the Tiki song.
Wasps, just so you know, are very important to the environment. They control
numbers of potential pests,
caterpillars and stuff that
can eat plants. Okay.
So without wasps... They're policing the caterpillars
I guess. Yeah, so essentially they're just
tiny little hitmen who go
around offing insects who are
innocently eating leaves in your garden.
And actually, speaking of animals and being
rude before, I was just mentioning about a cat
and there's a new app
I was just reading this morning.
So former Amazon engineer
has developed an app called Meow Talk.
And this is an app that apparently,
it's still a work in progress,
but you can download it right now
here in New Zealand.
We'll register what your cat is meowing
and meant to tell you
what the cat's meow means.
So it'll just be, I hate you.
I hate my life.
I hate this house. Can you test it on bubbles'll just be, I hate you. I hate my life. I hate this house.
Can you test it on bubbles?
Oh, yeah, I should actually.
I should go through.
Because they say it's still a bit of a work in progress.
So you can help, you know, go, I think this was the cat was saying I'm hungry or like
I'm happy or not.
The cat would ever say I'm happy.
Let's download it.
Can you download it now?
Yeah, apparently.
Oh, let's download it now.
Meow Talk.
Meow Talk.
Yeah.
But yes, it's still under development,
but it's available for download on Apple and Android phones.
Now, still under development means there is no authenticity
to this Meow Talk app,
but we'll charge you $2.99 a month for it.
Probably.
Still under development.
Oh, we haven't quite figured out how to translate cats yet,
but please download the app.
Still under development. Just like a chocolate milkshake, only white and disappointing.
It's Jono and Ben on the hits.
The A to Z of New Zealand.
We are calling every town and city in New Zealand.
We call one a day and we're slowly making our way around the country
calling every town and city alphabetically.
And as our boss says, Boss Todd says, how long's this got to go?
Yeah, well, two years, Toddy. Strap yourself in,
baby. Ben
Boyce. Kaikoura.
Have you been to Kaikoura before? Yeah, a few times
driving up. You know, we used to spend a lot of
holidays driving from
Macedon all the way to Amberley Beach and
Christchurch and also Christchurch. So, yeah,
you travel all the way from Picton driving
up the country. Oh, wonderful part of New Zealand.
Or driving down the country.
That annoys my dad too.
Because I just say,
oh, we're going up to somewhere
or we're going down to...
I don't actually think about where we are.
It's just a term.
It's a phrase for me.
But he's like, it's down.
Geographically, it's down.
You're like, oh, sorry.
I haven't thought about going down.
Well, who's to say that we've been looking
at New Zealand the wrong way?
What if the south,
what if the bluff is the top of the country? Yeah, true. We could have it all going down. Well, who's to say that we've been looking at New Zealand the wrong way? What if the south, what if the bluff is the top of the country?
Yeah, true. We could have it all upside
down, but anyway, Kaikoura is a seaside
settlement in the northern district of the
Canterbury region. And if you
like watching stuff, then watch
out, because Kaikoura is the place
for you. You can watch whales, watch
dolphins, watch seals, watch
TV, watch your step, watch
people through their windows as
they innocently go about their business. There's a lot of watching to be done in Kaikoura.
And it's where, you know, this picturesque seaside town is where the seaside meets human
life and where the seaside provides sea life that ends up on human plates. And we're about
to go through to one of those places right now. This is a famous tourist location, Nimsbin.
Hello, Nimsbin. Johnny speaking.
Hello, is that Nimsbin?
Yeah, how you doing?
It's a couple of low-level radio announcers phoning here from the hits.
It's Jono and Ben.
Or Jono and Ben.
Oh, Jono and Ben. Oh, nice.
Jono and Ben, that's right.
We phone every town and city in New Zealand.
We do one a day, Kaikoura.
We could not look past Kaikoura
and we could not look past the famous,
the world famous Ninsbin.
Oh, cheers guys.
Yeah, now what do you do at Ninsbin
for those that haven't seen?
Me, I am the fisherman.
I go out and catch all the crayfish and fish and cook it all up and get it all ready for
the old lady and the fella in the shop.
So there's an old lady and a fella in a shop and it looks like it's an old caravan converted
into a seaside restaurant with Nin's bin on it.
And you've been serving crayfish for since 1977.
Yeah, it's been a while, eh?
Have you been there the whole time?
My grandad started it, so yeah.
I've been there the whole time since I was a boy.
People from all over the world
come to your famous little restaurant.
Phil Cogan, host of The Amazing Race.
Yeah.
Who else have you had?
What other big bangers have you had turn up in Kaikoura?
No, not too many.
No one's going to reach Phil Coates.
Clark came through the other day and he had a feed.
He said it was beautiful.
Oh, Clark got the first man in New Zealand.
Clark gave it.
Oh, very nice.
He's a keen fisherman as well.
Yeah, yeah.
No, he's pretty cool, eh?
You know, he's a good man.
He's a good man.
And so, Kaikoura, you've obviously lived there your whole life.
Yep, yep.
What is there to do? Apart from a wonderful meal at Nin's Bins?
Oh, there's lots and lots of stuff to do in Kaikoura.
There's whale watching and, you know, go swim with the dolphins.
It's amazing.
But, you know, some awesome walks around the peninsula
and bits and pieces like that.
Yeah, and you go jump on the kayaks and see all the dolphins and the seals.
It's quite an amazing spot.
Yeah, right.
And you would have seen a fair share of whales over your time?
Yep, yep, the odd one.
Okay, name your top three whales.
I like the orcas, eh?
Because they come right up into the beach.
We used to sit in the shop and they'd be coming in right amongst the rocks.
Oh, my gosh.
Enormous whales.
Yeah, big orcas.
It's amazing.
I see there's been a few
Up in Wellington lately
Which is cool
Yeah
Okay
I'm going to
I'll go Moby Dick's
One of the top whales for me
Oh okay
Moby Dick
Yeah he's a good whale
Oh he's a big whale
What else has been a big whale?
Tom Jones
He was from Wales
Singer
So
He's a big whale
He's not a big whale
No
He's from Wales Catherine Zeta-Jones Is she from Wales? He's a big whale. He's not a big whale. No, he's from Wales.
Catherine Zeta-Jones.
Is she from Wales?
She's a big whale.
Couple of big whales there.
Couple of big whales.
Welsh people, yeah, yeah.
The whale tail, which was a fashion trend.
A fashion trend in the turn of the century, the turn of the millennium.
Some people would wear their G-strings over their jeans.
Oh. Yes. Oh.
Yes.
Oh, they get the little whale tail that pop up the top.
That was one of my top three whales.
And Whale Rider's a great movie from New Zealand as well,
so I think we're going to round it out with this awkward whale banter with that.
Oh, listen.
Okay, now your top three favourite dolphins.
Okay, no, we won't get into that.
Well, we'll pop in there next time we come past your way.
Yeah, that sounds good, matey.
Thanks for your time.
Take it easy, guys.
Hey, you've got toothpaste on the side of your mouth.
It's Jono and Ben on the hits.
Now it's time for some big news.
Small town, small town, small town.
I hate it when you get nominated for a Grammy
and they've put you in the wrong category.
Now, this is a really interesting story.
A Kiwi father who lives in Perth,
he's made international news
and provided a pretty good lesson to all of us
that you can be over the drink driving limit
without consuming any liquids.
Yeah, now this story,
it's a champagne DIC situation.
Police 107 would be kicking themselves
they didn't have their cameras on this one.
Yeah.
But it involves rumbles and involves an expat New Zealander
who's now living in Perth, Australia, Tommy Keefe.
And he joins us on the phone right now.
How long have you been there, Tommy?
I've been here probably about 10 years now.
I used to live back home.
Things got hard back home, I'm sure you'd know.
I had to move across the ditch.
So I ended up meeting an Aussie girl over here.
Next minute, I'm married to her.
And unfortunately, she passed away with brain cancer a couple of years ago.
Oh, mate, I'm sorry to hear that.
That's terrible.
Oh, boy, this life.
You've just got to keep going forward.
Six kids, too?
Is that right?
Yeah, I've got three older kids
to a first marriage. They're all in their
twenties now, so they're adults.
The belated wife left me with
three babies. So you're a
solo father of three young ones?
Yeah, pretty much, bro.
I made sure I only got
the clip up.
There's no more now.
There's no more coming up. No more now, now. There's no more coming.
No more now, brother.
Definitely not having any more.
Now, Tommy, you've made news, trans-Tasman news
across...
It's gone further than that, mate. It's gone all the way
to England. By the sounds of it, you want to stay
away from your rum and raisin balls,
Tommy.
Tell us what happened from your point of view.
Yeah, what's the story?
I was at a mate's birthday party.
Turned up there late, and I missed out on the first feed.
So my mate's mother-in-law got a whole plate together,
and it wasn't just rum balls.
She had all different types of cakes on there.
I'll be honest, mate, I'm a fiend for the food.
I mean, when you see a plate load of baked goods,
it's hard to turn away from it, right?
Well, the way she cooks these baked goods, brother,
you wouldn't have stopped either.
The first one I put in my mouth led to the second,
and it was the third, fourth, fifth.
I'm driving along quite happily,
munching out on these cakes and that,
and then, boom, booze bus
So I've rocked up there
And I'm thinking to myself
It's too easy
I haven't drunken anything
So it'll be all good
How many rum balls have you downed by this stage?
I'll tell you the truth, mate
I'd already got, you know, probably half the plate
Okay, so he's probably a dozen rum balls deep here
Yeah, fair enough, fair enough.
I'm figuring about a dozen
because the things are,
you know, they're no bigger
than probably
a golf stopper,
a bloody...
Yeah, they're tiny little...
Yeah, gotcha.
They are moorish,
though, aren't they,
their rumbles?
Why don't you start?
Yeah.
I put the first one
in my mouth
as I'm walking out the door
and I just thought to myself,
holy hell, man,
these are bloody gorgeous.
So you've just been innocently eating a dessert,
albeit a lot of it, because you were starving,
and it's ended up pushing you over the limit.
Yeah, but that's the thing, man.
It was like 0.1 over.
You must have been fully surprised
when they said that's come up as a failed breath test, right?
Yeah.
The men, the officer
were arguing.
He was like, mate, you ought to
have the... because I said, all I've had
is these bloody cakes.
And he goes to me, oh, what are they?
When I said rum balls and
Rosie Scott looked at me and rolled his eyes,
I was like, nah, nah, nah, they can't
be, man. They can't be bloody alcohol.
So I said, hey, try one.
And then he grabbed it.
Apparently cops aren't allowed to do that,
but he's taken a bite out of it anyway,
looked at me and gone, yeah, well, it can't be those,
so you have to have been drinking.
Even the police roadside taste tests didn't,
and so did you have to get your balls tested?
Oh, well, that was the thing, mate,
because the court case a couple of months later,
like if I'd been drinking, I would have just said straight out,
yeah.
Yeah, no, I understand.
You're not going to come up with some elaborate rumble plan,
are you?
Oh, that's sick.
And I've just gone to the judge, you know,
it is what it is, Your Honour.
That's my story and that's what happened.
Because he's looked at me and he's gone,
I really don't want to give you this, but the law is the law.
So, yeah, which I understand because, like I said before,
what does no one at the bloody thing say?
Yeah.
Well, I mean, all it's doing is really shaming you
and how many rumbles you ate, really.
How many cakes you had.
Well, that's pretty much what happened.
Well, we appreciate you talking to us on the radio as well
because I can imagine you probably the last thing you want to do
is talk to us. So we really do appreciate you sharing your us on the radio as well because I can imagine probably the last thing you want to do is talk to us.
So we really do appreciate you sharing your side of the story.
Well, you're the lucky guys because when I used to be back home,
I used to watch your shows all the time.
I am a bit of a fanboy of yours.
I'll help the boys out.
You know how desperate we are.
Lovely to meet you, mate.
And you look after yourself.
Keep safe over there.
Have a great Christmas.
I hope the kids have a great Christmas with you and hopefully we'll get to meet you, mate, and you look after yourself. Keep safe over there. Have a great Christmas. I hope the kids have a great Christmas with you,
and hopefully we'll get to meet you one day.
Yeah, same to you, Ben and Jono, and thank you very much, boys,
and no worries, guys.
See you later.
New Zealand's breakfast.
Just don't eat them.
They're chewy.
It's Jono and Ben on the hits.
Spy, the WhatsApp spy.co.nz.
All right, ladies and gentlemen, it's time for some Spy.
And if it's not in this bulletin, then it hasn't been copied and pasted from TMZ yet.
So just give us a moment and we'll get on to it for you later in the show.
So the 2021 Grammy nominations have been released.
They were released this morning.
So this is the best songs, basically, and albums.
Best songs, best albums, best performances.
What always confuses me
every year,
I think there's
Song of the Year,
but then there's also
Record of the Year,
and then there's also
Album of the Year,
and you'd think that
Record of the Year
kind of crosses over,
but there are
slight differences,
which I can't quite
remember at the moment,
but there are differences.
I think it's in the way
that it's made
or something like that.
You just made that up.
No, I didn't.
I remember that
from last year. I was going to gloss over it, but you didn't. You just made that up. No, I didn't. I remember that from last year.
Yeah, I felt like she did.
I was going to gloss over it, but you didn't.
You went right in there.
She just made that up.
We all just make stuff up on this show.
And so should I make up the nominee list?
No, no, no.
Actually, they're the legit nominees.
The legit nominees.
So Dua Lipa, Beyonce, and Taylor Swift
have topped the nominations list,
which is kind of expected.
Dua Lipa is a big artist.
But one of the surprises was that The Weeknd, which you kind of expected. Dua Lipa is a big artist. But one of the surprises
was that The Weeknd, which you'll know from this
massive song,
he didn't get any nominations.
This was one of the bangers of 2020.
One of the bangers, listen to me.
It was, wasn't it?
Wouldn't you say so? But also, which is
interesting, he's performing at the Super Bowl halftime,
which is a big deal. So you'd
think that if he's been asked to perform at the Super Bowl halftime show,
surely he would get a Grammy nomination as well.
Oh, there's politics.
There's bureaucracy at play here.
Is Benny nominated for anything?
No, I don't think so.
Stop talking about it then.
If Benny's not involved, I don't want to know about it.
Did Lorde ever win a Grammy?
Yeah, she did.
She did?
Yeah.
Wow.
She did for Royals, right?
That's right, yeah.
Her and Joel Little won for that. Yeah, she did. She did, wow. She did for Royals, right? That's right, yeah. Her and Joel Little won for that.
So it was awesome.
And it's cool to see also some of the stars that became big
because of TikTok, like Doja Cat.
They've had some nominations as well.
And Savage, Megan Thee Stallion.
So TikTok's really made some of these artists big
and get nominations too.
You know what I didn't understand?
She was Grammy's Lord and been nominated for three other ones as well.
So there you go.
Wow, that's great on the spot research there from you.
Thank you.
I just made it up.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Thank you to our rock solid Wi-Fi we have here at The Hits.
You know what I learned about TikTok
is you think everything's by accident,
but there's a whole system behind
the success of the songs on TikTok.
So there's TikTok musical directors working with record companies
to get songs popular on that platform.
Really?
Yeah, now there is.
I think at the start it was a lot more by accident,
but now there's a whole science behind some of the big artists
getting big on TikTok, yeah.
And songs specifically made for TikTok.
Yeah, Drake released the bloody, it was shocking.
What was it?
The Toosie Slide.
It was like, Drake, what are you doing, mate?
You're just trying to get.
It's like the Hokey Tokey.
You put your right hand in, you put your.
And you're shaking all of that.
Is that going to be on TikTok?
Surely it should be, eh?
That's the dance we all can do.
Hokey Tokey.
Now, is it the Hokey Tokey or the Hokey Pokey?
I'm not sure.
I think it depends where you are, you know?
Do the Hokey Pokey.
I think it's the Hokey Tokey.
It's the Hokey Tokey.
Yeah.
The Hokey Pokey's the ice cream, but I don't know.
I mean, I don't know.
Yeah.
Look, I'm not going to stand here and say that I know everything about the hokey-tokey.
We're just making it all up.
No, I'm just going to shake it all about and move on.
The hokey-tokey.
The original TikTok dance.
Let's make it big.
Let's make it big.
Let's bring it back.
And that's spy from where you can go to the hits.co.nz.
Morning.
It's Jono and Ben on the hips.
Just one month until Christmas.
Of course, today is November 25th.
And earlier in the show.
You've got to stop saying that, apparently.
Someone's texting saying,
stop reminding people it's a month until Christmas
and start stressing them out.
Oh, sorry.
Maybe that person should also not look at calendars too.
Yeah.
The newspaper, the dates on the newspaper as well.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
So just refrain from stressing people.
There's still plenty of time.
No, you're stressing.
Your voice is stressing me out.
You're getting higher.
You're getting more stressed.
Lots of time.
Heaps of time.
Four weeks.
It's not like it's tomorrow.
There's lots of time.
But we wanted to know if people have already done their Christmas shopping.
And some amazing people have done it in like June, July last year.
And this lady we spoke to
earlier had done it at the end
of last Christmas. When did you get
all your shopping done by Sam?
I had it all done in October
but we sort of go back
for July.
July!
Jade, welcome. Your Christmas
shopping's done and dusted?
Hi, yes, yes, it is.
I'm very much the same as Sam,
and I was done in October but started planning in July.
All right, Catherine, you got your shopping done?
I have, yes.
When did you get it done?
Well, I start straight after Christmas.
I've got four little granddaughters who love pretty clothes,
so whenever there's a sale on,
I go and grab some clothes for them and put them aside.
And then closer to Christmas, I get them one big present each.
Wow, impressive.
So one Christmas ends, the next day, Boxing Day,
she's out shopping for the next Christmas.
It's a plenty of time, plenty of time.
No, you're stressing people out, mate.
It's your job to come on here and stress people out.
No, it's not.
It's what you're doing.
I'm trying not to stress anyone out.
I want to give the start of the day on an enjoyable note.
Well, you're starting everyone on a stressy note.
New Zealand's most stressed out breakfast show.
That's all we are.
If you want to get stressed for your day,
tune in to John O'Byrne.
Something you've forgotten today too.
There you go.
You're running late for work too, by the way.
Your boss ain't going to be happy.
But this has started like a competition on the text machine, 4487.
And actually, I love talking to this next guy because he's a New Zealander based in Oregon in the US.
And he's our only international listener.
And it gives us the opportunity to go, welcome to our international audience.
We can't actually do that officially.
John from Oregon, come on in.
How are you?
How are you doing, boys?
Good morning. We're doing good.
Nice to hear your voice again.
Yeah, you too, mate. How's COVID over there,
John, in Oregon?
We just started another
four-week lockdown. Oh,
mate. Oh, so you are getting a lockdown.
From what I understand, different
states in America are obviously having different
policies and not everyone's doing a lockdown.
Yeah, the whole West Coast, Oregon, Washington, California,
they all decided to do a two-week.
And then the big cities like Portland, we're doing a four-week.
So we're coming into Thanksgiving and nobody's allowed to get together,
which is a bit of a shame.
That is a shame.
That's what it is.
So that means Christmas Day you'll be locked down?
We come out like the 23rd of December.
Right, right.
But gee whiz, here in New Zealand we're so lucky.
Yeah.
You just don't realise it, do you?
And I'm spending my time watching New Zealand TV
and listening to New Zealand radio
and ordering expensive New Zealand food on the internet.
Oh, good on you, mate.
Is there anything you want to say to your family over here in New Zealand, John?
Yeah, I know they're out there, you know, playing sports
and getting out and about and taking holidays,
and I'm just extremely jealous of them.
Merry Christmas, you bastards.
I was hoping for an emotional moment there,
but all we got was a Merry Christmas, you bastards.
Oh, so good, John.
Now, John, speaking of Christmas,
we understand you're very, very organised.
We were talking to someone before that
does their Christmas shopping the day after
Christmas for the following, for the next year, but
you can beat that.
Yeah, well, I would always come over in the
middle of the year and give them presents
for Christmas, but I
was there last March, and
I was there for a month,
and I decided I'd just do all the shopping,
and I got my family, my brother, my parents,
my nephews and nieces, all their presents for four years.
Wrapped everything, put a card on everything,
put a date on everything saying,
don't open till Christmas 2023,
and they're all set for a while.
So you've got Christmas till 2024 all covered, do you, John?
All covered, man.
Closet full of presents at their house.
Wow.
That's organised.
That must be the biggest challenge for the children in that household,
knowing there's a cupboard load of presents,
four years worth of presents, and not to touch them.
It would be.
I don't think the kids know about it.
I think my parents, the grandparents, are the ones that are the keepers of the presents. Oh, the keepers. It would be. I don't think the kids know about it. I think my parents, the grandparents, are the
ones that are the keepers of the presents.
Oh, the keepers. Yeah, right. Okay. Well,
the kids now know about them after you've
called them all bastards. They now know there's
a couple of loaded presents hiding over at the
grandparents. John, listen, you
keep safe over there, mate. Always love hearing from
you. And yeah, thank you so much for listening. And
we're thinking of you guys locked down over there,
mate. Yeah, you too, guys.
Have a good one.
See you, John.
Want more Jono and Ben?
You can catch up with the boys anytime.
Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram.
Now, Skinny are friends of the show,
and they've got a new TV ad that we mentioned.
We mentioned this on Monday.
It's all about Skinny's endless data weekends.
You can get free endless mobile data for Skinny customers every
weekend of summer, which is amazing. Oh, don't forget if you've got to be
on a $16 plan or over the invoice, don't forget
that little important detail. But
at the end of the ad, they're talking about 2020
and they're like, anything could happen. And then
they get a little notification, the people in the ad
going, oh, Israel Dagg, the former rugby
player, is going to start a rap career as Little
Dagg. He's considering a rap
career. And even him just considering a rap career,
he's already had a more successful rap career
than we've had a career.
Yeah.
It's just him thinking about having a rap career.
And on that note too, Ben Boyce would like to announce
we're starting a new career too
as semi-professional topless waiters.
The semi-professional part is sometimes Ben turns up to work
not topless.
And I'm like, mate, you've got one job.
One job. You're standing up here without a top on.
So that's what we're going to announce.
Okay, yeah.
But we spoke to Israel, Dick, because we phoned him yesterday.
We wanted to know if this is actually a thing,
if he's really going to pursue a rap career before Christmas.
Mate, that's the thing.
It's 2020.
This has been one hell of a year, so anything can happen this year, mate.
Very vague.
Very vague.
But, you know, the hip-hop vague very vague but you know the hip hop industry
is vague
you know
it's elusive
just dropping little hints
like Taylor Swift
does little hints
doesn't she
when she's going to
release an album
little clues
little easter eggs
so maybe that's what
Israel's doing
yeah you're right
he didn't deny it
and you even pitched
some songs to him
hey don't put this on me
well I was part of
the second one
unashamedly
sorry
part of the second one
but you know we're like
Well if he's going to do a rap career
Maybe we can get involved
You know the radio career's not working out for us
Maybe the rap game would
And so we pitched him some options
Izzy, Izzy, Izzy
Can't you see
Sometimes your words just hypnotise me
I mean that's just one
Snoop Daggy
Dag
Oh my god
Could two white guys make The notorious B.I.G. and Snoop Dogg any cooler?
I don't think so.
I don't think so.
We raised their cred just then, ladies and gentlemen.
Oh, God.
Terrible.
We've been issued a challenge by ourselves to prove our rap credentials to Israel Dagg by Friday.
And your wife, actually, Amanda, came up with this because she was listening,
and she's got a great idea for a parody.
Oh, yeah, so there's the song we all know,
Savage Love.
It's huge worldwide.
But I still want that, yeah, Savage Love.
Jason Derulo and Josh685,
the Kiwi Teenager, as well, collaborating.
It's a huge song everywhere about Savage Love.
Yeah, and so we're wanting to collaborate with Izzy Dagg,
and so Amanda came up with Marriage Love.
This is your wife, Amanda.
Marriage Love.
So you do a song about all the tropes of a married couple.
All the things you might discuss,
potentially argue about,
all those things that happen within a marriage.
What are the things that you could put into a song
about marriage love?
Like Jen and my wife and me,
we're always arguing about who's more tired. I'm more tired. No, you're more tired. No, I haven the things that you could put into a song about marriage life? Like Jen and my wife and me, we're always arguing about who's more tired.
I'm more tired.
No, you're more tired.
No, I haven't been, you know.
That's the thing that we're always.
I've got this.
Who's more busy?
Who's more busy and who's more tired?
We're the same.
Like that could be something.
I don't know if there's something in your relationship.
Yeah, who's more busy is definitely.
Oh, yeah, but I am.
Yeah, but it's, you know, everyone's trying to.
And you start finding that, oh, I'll be there at three o'clock.
I'll go to work. I'm more tired. Well, go to bed. Go to bed. You start finding that, oh, I'll be there at three o'clock. Oh, it's at work.
Oh, more time.
Well, go to bed.
Go to bed.
Why don't we both go to bed and stop talking about who's more tired?
So 0800 The Hits, this is what we wanted.
A little bit of a brainstorming session.
An open board.
No idea's a bad idea.
What are some things that happen in your relationship
that we can include in this marriage love song?
All right, give us a call right now.
0800 The Hits.
The nationwide brainstorm is on. So we'll go to Jenny in Christchurch. Something that's happening in this marriage love song. All right, give us a call right now. 0800 THE HITS. The nationwide brainstorm is on.
So we'll go to Jenny in Christchurch.
Something that's happening in your marriage
that we need to put in this song, Jimbo.
My husband never changes the empty toilet roll.
I don't know how many times I have to tell him,
but every time it's empty and it's just left on the roll.
It seems like the world's biggest task
when it needs to be done.
And the bin, like when the bin is full,
that's the thing, you just keep jamming more stuff in there. Everyone just keeps jamming.
Sort of ends up like a pyramid in Egypt, you know, carefully balancing objects on there.
That's very good, Jen. Now, Jenny, can I ask you a question? Is he leaving like one square
on there, or is it a completely bare roll? Bare.
Now, what I like to do is I just like to leave a little square. I'll be like, no, there's something there.
You can still use that. That's enough.
All right, Jan, we'll try and get that in there.
Thank you very much.
Palmerston North is where Charlotte's from.
What in is Charlotte?
Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast.
Hello.
What's going on in your marriage, Shaz?
Oh, that's really annoying to me,
but my husband finishes work earlier than me,
so when he comes home,
he'll just start watching the Netflix show that we've been watching together.
And he'll literally, he won't ask me,
he'll just start watching it, and then I'll sit down after dinner And he'll literally, he won't ask me, he'll just start watching it
and then I'll sit down
after dinner being like,
cool, let's watch another episode
and we've skipped an entire episode
because he's watched it.
Ben Boyce has done that
but then he puts up a facade
and pretends he hasn't done it.
Oh yeah, but my wife right now,
she's watching,
we're watching The Queen.
Well, I thought we were watching
The Queen's Gab together
but she's like four or five episodes
ahead of me.
And she's like,
oh, you're only up to this bit,
are you?
I'm like, yeah.
This was a couple's thing.
We were doing this together.
Together, for better or worse.
I fell asleep watching it because I was tired.
But I thought, well, you would pause it and you wouldn't carry on watching it.
Yeah, and just sit there in the room in silence.
Thank you very much, Charlotte.
Appreciate that.
We'll try and get that into the song.
Paula and Podong are welcome.
How are you?
Morning.
Good.
How are you?
Yeah, we're therapy.
Therapy this morning. What's going on in your relationship, Paula?
Forgetting your anniversary.
I mean, no matter how many times
I drop the hint, quite often
my husband will forget
our anniversary. I've had that
happen to me. I've forgotten it.
The date is tattooed on my arm, which is not
a good excuse in that
regard. But anyway, it's happened,
so we'll put it in the song, right?
That's good.
Yeah.
Tattoos, you have no excuse, do you?
I mean, you've even got Lorde tattooed.
You've got your two kids and Lorde tattooed
on your other issue.
I do, yeah, yeah.
Your third favourite, your most successful child.
She's doing great, Lorde.
Lorde, thank you very much, Paula.
We'll try and get that into the song.
We're going to pitch to Israel, Dag.
Someone's just texted here, 4487.
My husband always tries to pretend to massage my shoulders,
thinking it'll lead to other things, and I'm just squirming.
We'll see how the song goes.
I guess we'll try and write that by tomorrow, right?
It's a quick turnaround.
We're prolific.
Prolific in the rap game, and that's what you need.
You need prolific turnaround in the rap game.
That's what it's all about.
You guys will be in the Grammy nomination soon.
Thank you, Juju.
Appreciate your positivity.
More painful
than your alarm clock.
It's Jodo and Ben
on the hits.
Kia ora.
I'm Ash Thomas
and this is
The B***ing News.
Alright, so producer Juliet
proudly presents
three news stories
that we usually
wouldn't give airtime to
but because she's
beeped out some words
in the headlines
they get a little bit
of lip service in the 6 o'clock hour.
I always find this quite interesting, though,
because the actual stories are unique news stories that actually happened.
Yeah, well, last night I was trying to find some news stories.
It took me a long time because there were a few mediocre ones.
I was like, I'm not going to settle for mediocre.
What time?
We don't know this show.
No, no, no.
We're below mediocre at best, aren't we?
We've set the bar very low.
You usually send these through quite late at night.
I do.
I feel like it just takes a while for you to do.
I send them at about 8.30.
I'm like, these guys are probably asleep.
Yeah, just don't work too hard on them.
I will not.
Here we go.
It's in the six o'clock hour mark.
It deserves 10 minutes of prep, Max.
We're benched this evening.
All right, here's some mediocre headlines.
British Airways is selling off its...
so people can recreate flying at home.
We've got to figure out what the beat words...
I'm going to say British Airways is selling off the wings to all of their planes
so people can recreate flying at home.
I'm going to go with drinks trolley.
I'd love to have a drinks trolley at home.
You get one down with a drinks trolley full of alcohol. Yep. British Airways is selling off its crockery, slippers and trolley. I'd love to have a drinks trolley at home. You get one down here with a drinks trolley full of alcohol.
Yep.
British Airways is selling off
its crockery, slippers and trolley
so people can recreate flying at home.
There you go.
It's a bunch of merch.
And they're wanting people
to buy them for Christmas gifts as well,
which is quite smart.
Oh, the poor airlines.
They're just...
I know.
We'll sell off the eye masks.
Anything.
The seat pillows.
They're really reaching, aren't they?
Oh, I know.
I feel sorry.
Because then they had a thing with Qantas in Aussie, didn't they?
That people would jump on a plane.
And they wouldn't leave the country, but they would just do a loop of Australia for three hours.
That's right.
It was the point to nowhere.
And it sold out.
And then in Japan, they were just doing flight simulators, weren't they?
So you just sat in there.
With like a virtual mask on.
Oh, wow.
And you could see it virtually when you're flying somewhere. But people played for that as well. So people really miss in there. With like a virtual mask on. Oh, wow. And you could see it virtually when you're flying somewhere.
But people played for that as well.
So people really miss in flying.
Who's missing flying that much?
Yeah, it's more about the destination, isn't it?
Yeah.
But anyway.
I mean, I do enjoy flying, but you know.
You do sleep.
You ever sleep?
I just sleep with my mouth wide open.
He always has a sleep.
But I remember sleep for a whole 12-hour flight,
like from start to finish.
Yeah, that's right.
It's a great place to sleep in a fart canister.
Were you drooling?
Yeah, I'm a drooler as well.
It's funny walking through planes in the middle of the night
when everyone's asleep,
and they all look dead with their mouth open.
It's like a zombie flight.
It really is.
All right, the next one.
British doctor is trying to claim
*** as his own by firing lasers at it every night.
I'm going to say trying to claim
control of his runaway appendage.
Oh, okay.
Firing a laser.
I'm going to go he's going into galactic battle.
He's firing lasers at the Millennium Falcon.
I don't know.
British doctor is trying to claim Mars as his own
by firing lasers at it every night.
Now, I have an issue with this
because GPs and doctors are meant to be smart.
And, you know, like firing lasers at planets,
I feel like that's not a very logical thing to do.
Oh, well, word for Dr. Evil.
In the dated comedic film Austin Powers,
he fired some lasers.
Who owns all the planets?
Well, that's the thing.
So it says that the current,
he reckons that the current space laws
mean that anyone can claim planets
as long as you can sort of prove
or help that planet become slightly more livable.
So he reckons that his laser beams
fire carbon dioxide to Mars,
which makes Mars a bit more livable to humans.
Oh, so he's saying it's his.
If that makes sense, yeah.
So is the moon technically America's?
Because they landed on it first.
Oh, and they put a flag on there.
They've got a flag up there.
True.
They own the moon.
Oh.
Who knew?
It's fair game out there.
I mean, Auckland and New Zealand property prices are going out of control.
There's a housing crisis.
The government are trying to deal with it.
Let's buy Pluto.
Let's get another planet.
Yeah, okay.
Let's renovate Pluto.
And the final one, website offering
dream job, paying $2,500
to watch 25
in 25 days. Oh, I'm going to say 25
episodes of Dog Almighty.
Yeah, well they'd have to pay people to watch us
on TV. There aren't even 25 episodes. We'd have to film
seven more. Yeah, I thought maybe they were paying people
to watch us on TV. The answer
is 25 Christmas films in 25 days.
And the reason is they just need people to figure out what the best one is
and you win year-long subscriptions to all of the streaming services
as well as $2,500.
Oh, that's cool.
Would you do it?
It's like an advent calendar, isn't it, of Christmas movies.
Yeah, probably.
We were talking about this yesterday. It's only a couple of hours a calendar, isn't it, of Christmas movies. Yeah, probably.
We were talking about this yesterday.
It's only a couple of hours a day, isn't it?
Yeah.
We were talking about Macaulay Culkin yesterday.
Home Alone.
Yeah.
Great Christmas movie. Is that the best Christmas movie?
That's one of my faves.
I would watch that and Alf, Will Ferrell, Alf every year.
What about Chicken of Love, actually?
Yeah, Love, Actually.
No, I used to.
I used to sit down with the kids every year and watch those other two.
But you're a love, actually.
Great film.
Yeah, another great one.
Yeah, I can't pick a favourite.
And this Die Harder Christmas film, that's the other big debate as well, people,
because it's set at Christmas time, but not as Christmassy with the action going on.
Did it need to be set at Christmas time?
Was it essential to the plot line?
Well, you had to get home for Christmas.
Oh, okay.
And that's the news and beeps, my friends.
Well done, Juliet. Lots of fun. The news and beeps
will be back when we bench it around about
the six o'clock hour another day.
Not a morning person? Sadly,
neither of these two. It's Jono and Ben on the
heads. Scrolling through your feed.
Now listen, while you've been rolling around
in your bed and dribbling out the side of your mouth,
Ben's been doing exactly
the same, but then he woke up and stole some stories from the Herald
to read to you and update you and scrolling through your feed.
Oh, I did.
Now, international air travellers in the future
may need to provide they've been vaccinated,
details that they've been vaccinated against COVID-19
in order to board flights.
That's what Qantas says they're going to be doing
over the next couple of years
once vaccinations become more of a thing.
Oh, well, the anti-vaxxers,
they'll be torn.
They would be torn.
Are you an anti-vaxxer?
No, I'm not.
I'm pro-vaccination, so yeah.
Are you an anti-vaxxer?
No, I'm pro-vaccinations too.
I don't understand why you would be one,
but hey, I'm not one.
Well, I haven't spoken to an anti-vaxxer,
so I haven't heard that one either.
There's a little bit of like,
I guess you're a bit mindful of this new vaccine coming out,
you know, how safe it is.
And obviously you want to see it go through all the proper safety things before you like go,
jab it into me, you know.
Have you done all the proper safety things?
Yeah.
The doctor, yeah, we did all the proper safety things.
Okay, jab it in.
I'll take your word for it.
That's why I'm not a medical professional.
The proper safety things.
What are the proper safety things?
I'm testing it on people.
No, I saw a good thing this morning.
It was like, what if you're an anti-vaxxer,
but you've got a lot of Qantas airpoints?
Oh, you'd be torn.
There's a lot of great men going around on the internet over that one.
You'd be like, oh, what am I going to do here?
But yeah, I think there was a theory that vaccinating babies
led to health issues later in life, didn't it?
Was it Carmen Electra was a big...
I think it's been defunct.
Is that the right word?
No, not Carmen Electra.
Jenny McCarthy.
Right.
No, not Jenny McCarthy.
It was Jim Carrey's wife.
Oh, she's one of the judges on The Masked Singer now.
Yeah.
Yeah, Jenny something.
Jenny something.
Jenny something.
Big acting backside.
Jenny something.
Yeah.
You know, what's it? You're really quick on this. So, Jenny something. Anyway, Jenny something. Big, big anti-vaxxer. Jenny something. You know, what's it?
Just, Julia, you're really quick on this.
So, Jenny something.
It says that Jim Carrey's wives have been Lauren Holly and Melissa Woma.
Okay, what was that?
I'm sure they were in a relationship somewhere along the line.
Anyway.
Let's just all agree.
There's some anti-vaxxers out there.
Yeah.
I don't know who they are.
One of them may have been married to Jim Carrey, may not have been.
And they've done some doctor testing stuff.
And there you go.
There's some updating.
Should we tap out of this now? No, keep going, baby, keep blowing on through.
This is a really lovely story.
A US billionaire who's stranded in New Zealand,
he's made good on a promise to donate money
to Starship here in New Zealand.
So Gabe Newell, he's involved with Rocket Lab,
and he said if every person that watches
the live stream of Rocket Lab sending with Rocket Lab, and he said, for every person that watches the live stream of Rocket Lab
sending a Rocket Lab rocket into space,
I'll donate $1 for every person to Starship.
And now he's donated $286,000 to Starship.
Wow, that is incredible.
What a nice guy.
It's in a garden gnome on the rocket up into space,
a ceramic garden gnome, which is cool.
That Rocket Lab's incredible, isn't it?
I think it was the first space launch to happen.
Was it this year?
I think.
Because no other NASA is not in operation.
So I think one of the only space rockets that's gone up to space this year
is one from New Zealand.
Gabe Newell, worth $4 billion.
Oh, really?
Video game designer. Okay. Yeah, good on him. He's 1.7 metres tall, did Newell, worth $4 billion. Oh, really? Video game designer.
Okay.
Yeah, good on him.
He's 1.7 metres tall, did you know, and height.
Okay.
Was he also married to Jim Carrey?
No, no, he wasn't.
He was married to Lisa Newell.
Okay.
I think she might be an anti-vaxxer.
No, I don't know.
Yeah, no, I'm pretty sure she is.
We'll just say it anyway.
And so, yeah, well done, Gabe.
What a very nice gesture.
That's a lovely thing.
Our Starship are obviously wrapped by that
I mean we could have
said that with our TV show
we wouldn't have had
to give that much
but I mean it would have been
still really
a lovely thing to do
well listen
I'll give a dollar
to any charity
I'll give a dollar
okay here's the thing
name a charity
name one
Starship's top of mind
Starship okay
I'll give a dollar
for every call we get
in the next 10 seconds
oh 10 seconds
yeah
start the timer start the timer is there someone calling we'll give a dollar for every call we get in the next 10 seconds. Oh, 10 seconds? Yeah.
Start the timer, Juju.
Start the timer.
Is there someone calling?
We'll give a dollar to Starship.
Still no calls yet.
I want to give this money.
I want to look like a good guy.
No, but you didn't because you put a 10-second timer on. No, sorry, Sandra's just calling through now.
The buzzer went.
Sorry, Sandra.
Oh, well, there we go.
And that is scrolling to your feed this morning.
Tried to do it.
Tried.
The people didn't want us to donate.
Like starting your day without your morning coffee.
It's Jono and Ben on my heads.
Spy.
The WhatsApp.
Spy.co.nz.
Listen, her loose lips have been solely responsible for sinking ships before.
Literally, she was the one in charge of the Titanic disaster,
but that's fine because those loose lips still give us great gossip every morning.
Juliet, what's happening in Spy?
Thanks very much.
Now, Jada Pinkett-Smith, one of her sort of big things is her Red Table Talk,
which is a Facebook series where she has different guests on all the time.
Is the table red?
I've never paid attention to the table.
That's a good question.
I actually think it is because that would be kind of awkward if it's not.
The photos you show me, there is a white table.
Although they're not at the red table talk
in these photos. Anyway, I'll
start focusing in on the red table. No, there is a
red table in a lot of other photos online.
Yeah, great. Well, I'm glad it's living up to his name.
But the
latest guest on the red table talk
is Will Smith's ex-wife
and Jada... Oh, jeez.
How would you feel about that, Ben? Rolling out your exes to Amanda's online show, which I know she's ex-wife. And Jada... Oh, jeez. How would you feel about that, Ben?
Rolling out your exes to Amanda's online show,
which I know she's filming at the moment.
Green table talk.
Green table chat.
Yeah, if your ex turned up there on the show,
how would you feel?
I think, in this case, they seem very open.
Don't they have a good relationship in this case? Yeah, yeah.
All the headlines are like,
wow, it's the ex-wife, blah, blah, blah.
And, you know, you've got Jada on there,
and you've got Willow,
which is Jada and Will's daughter,
as well as Jada's own mother as well.
So it's all kind of their side of the family
with Will Smith's ex-wife.
But they all get on really well,
and they were doing some baking and stuff.
We are what you call a blended family.
Absolutely.
We do holidays together,
and Miss Rere hooks us up.
Her name's Riri.
And she goes on holiday with him.
Yeah. That's interesting.
Well, I guess they've got a son
that's part of it. Yeah, so it's kind of
cool. I think Trey was the son that
Will and her had in this first marriage.
Yes. Okay, we'll check this out.
They're just a text. I don't imagine we'll get any
response on this. 4487.
Do you go on holiday with your partner's ex or your ex
and the new family in a blended sit show?
Yeah.
How does it work?
I'm sure there's people that get along just fine.
Oh, yeah.
If both people are happy and they've moved on
and they've probably gone,
oh, we're better separately, then I'm sure it's all good, right?
Good deal for the kids, mate.
Some people stay together for the kids
and slowly grow hatred for each other. I know. And then it's all good, right? Good deal for the kids, mate. Some people stay together for the kids and slowly grow hatred for each other.
I know, and then it's not good for the kids.
4487, see if we can get someone on.
I'll chuck it out there.
We'll see what happens.
What's your saying?
We'll throw something at the wall.
And see what sticks.
Yeah, that's basically the ethos of this programme.
And Emma Stone,
so obviously I think she's one of Hollywood's
most highest paid actress, actresses.
She reveals that her very first Golden Globes that she went to, she took her mum to.
And they were sat next to Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt when they were together.
But her mum doesn't usually drink that much, but she got very excited at the Golden Globes, had a few too many champers.
And then when they were seated next to Brad and Angelina, just started chatting away, embarrassing Emma,
but making small talk and being like,
oh, so do you have any kids?
How many do you have?
What are their names?
Knowing full well that she has kids,
knowing a lot about Angelina's life.
Oh, so she knew all those details.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
When you start like bands with a famous person,
of course you're going to know everything about them.
I'd be so good to go, what do you guys do?
They'll be like, oh, well, we kind of,
I guess we're actors.
Oh, yeah.
I don't know.
Have you been in anything
I've seen?
Kevin Boyce,
your dad,
jeez,
he would have been,
he would be great
sitting at the Golden Globes
next to him.
He loves light band stuff.
He's good.
He accosted Brooklyn Beckham
when he was travelling
through America
on a caravan tour.
That's right, yeah.
Like, he just does,
he sees someone.
I've been around before. He goes, oh, there's Winston Peters. I'll be like, yeah, yeah. He goes, I'll go see tour. That's right, yeah. Like, he just does, he sees someone. I've been around before, he goes,
oh, there's Winston Peters.
I'll be like, yeah, yeah.
He goes, I'll go see him.
You're like, why?
Why?
What are you going to talk to him about?
I'll go, I'll keep it here,
and he'll go have a chat, you know.
So, I mean,
oh, you find some sort of connection
loosely from somewhere, and then...
Yeah, he always likes drilling down
and figuring out how he might know your father.
Oh, that's amazing.
Is there a connection from...
Yeah.
He's a chatter. He's connection from... He's a chatter.
He's a chatter.
He is a chatter.
That's why you've ended up on radio.
It's been passed down in the trees.
Every time we call Kevin on radio,
Ben's always going to pre-record it.
Because if we go live...
Oh, you end up talking about all sorts of stuff.
You're like, oh, we can't put this on the radio.
Yeah.
And that's Spy.
For more, you can check out thehits.co.nz.
Tomorrow on the show, Jono, we've got 660.
It's very exciting. We'll catch you guys from 6 o'clock. Want more, you can check out thehits.co.nz. Tomorrow on the show, Jono, we've got 660. It's very exciting.
We'll catch you guys from 6 o'clock.
Want more Jono and Ben?
You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from 6 on The Hits.
And via the iHeartRadio app.
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