Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - October 12 - David Seymour, Ben's Dog Emergency, We Gave Away $10,000!!

Episode Date: October 12, 2020

Hello hello! This morning we were back in the studio after spending the weekend in Taupo for our $10K Tee Off! We didn't get any balls in, so does that make our time in Taupo completely pointless? Who knows. Buuuut we gave away that $10K on the show today! And we dished a bit about what went on that you wouldn't have seen or heard, like how Jono nearly got kidnapped in Auckland... We were also joined by David Seymour and Joseph Parker on the show too!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Here we go, here we go, here we go. Not joining in on the song, Ben?

Oh, sorry. Yeah, no, it was just a little... Thanks, I mean, no. I know you were nervous. No one was playing with me. Juliet, you're sitting there in silence. Well, you were Oh, sorry. I was trying to know where no one was playing with me. Juliet, you're sitting there in silence. Well, you were like, here we go. Here we go. Welcome to the podcast.

What email? You tell me what you cleared off the... Oh, it's one of those things you're like, I've got to remember to do that, so I was trying to do that to send an email about something we're doing tomorrow, hopefully. Oh, so it was a reminder email to yourself. Well, yeah. Are we doing this tomorrow or not, to yourself. Well, yeah. Or as mine's going, are we doing this tomorrow or not? You know?

Yeah, right. Okay, that's good. I'm glad you got that off the desk. I haven't quite got it there. I'm halfway through. Okay, let's finish it while we're doing the podcast intro. You talk out loud while you type it.

Okay. I just want to make sure. I want to clarify if we're doing a voice... You know, we're going to do a voice job. Oh, for the dog show tomorrow? Yeah, voiceover for the dog show. So I've just got, hey, just want to keep...

We've kept our Tuesday afternoon free for that. For the voiceover, yeah. Justover for the dog show so I've just got hey just want to keep we've kept our Tuesday afternoon free for that. For the voiceover yeah? Just want to make sure that's still happening.

Yeah because you've got a scheduling conflict? Well no there was something amazing here at work they were kind of like are you available

for it? Oh they wanted us there. Yeah. Yeah right okay. And also just for me just going are we doing this tomorrow

or not? I reckon we should start every podcast with Ben replying to emails. Super busy with us this week so we can choose that. That's good.

Nice work. Hey, we've got a very exciting podcast for you this morning. Had a fun show. We gave away $10,000 because believe it or not we didn't manage to get

the hole-in-one in Lake Taupo. The hole-in-one attraction which sits out on a pontoon on the lake there. A thousand balls. Not one of them went

in that hole. And so we gave away $10,000 today. And it always felt good. It was really cool, actually. We should do that every Monday. It makes me feel good. It would be nice to give away $10,000 every day. First time we've ever given away $10,000, which is cool.

Yeah, it made me feel nice inside. All my nice bits felt really nice. Also, David Seymour, you know him from polling well at the moment, David Seymour, leader of the ACT Party. He joined us. And who did he say this about? He's just such a dick. I mean, why would you?

Well, he is. I mean, he's an example of someone who really needed to retire gracefully. Who is he talking about? Spoiler alert, it was you, Jono. No, that's the same thing I say about Jono every time everybody goes what do you really think of Jono he needs to retire gracefully

I just gave I dedicated two minutes of you to you clearing an email maybe I do need to retire gracefully hey have a wonderful

podcast you enjoy it it's going to be a game changer in your life and if you don't come out of this at the other end as a better

human being well there's nothing more that we can do the soggy cornflakes of radio it's jonathan man on the head we've just come back from taupo we're down there friday saturday hitting 1000 golf balls towards the hole in one there's 10 grand prize money if you get it onto the pontoon and get it inside the hole we were going to give that away to a listener if we got it uh but we still got 10 grand to give away which is cool this morning. Yeah, it was a fun

filled couple of days. And when I say fun filled, frustrating couple of days. And there's other F words I could use, but I won't at this earlier hour of the morning, because fantastic is not a word you want to use first thing on a Monday morning, Ben Boyce. We kick things off Friday morning, just after 8 o'clock, with the Prime Minister

getting things started. Well, first of all, wishing both of you the best of luck and to every listener, good luck. Now officially launching the Hold On One Challenge. Oh, okay. Okay. Shall we do it? Shall we do the first shot?

We haven't had the first shot. Jono, you can go up for the first shot. Okay, here we go. Oh! Not bad, not bad. No, no. We didn't get it, sorry. The pontoon's about 100 metres away from the shore

and every ball that we hit, the 1,000 balls, was allocated to a listener. Now, most of these were all over the country, but now and again, people would come down. They were. I mean, people travelled from afar. A lady travelled from Switzerland, quarantined for two weeks,

just so she could be there to see her ball not go into a hole. But we do appreciate the level of commitment she showed. This was one of my favourite moments because the pressure was on you where a lady came down with her whole family. Emma has ball number 65. Jono, we're going to watch right now in front of Emma as you nail the hole in one for her 10 grand. Why would you do this to me?

Emma's walking her kids down here as well. Christmas is off and you don't get it. Christmas is cancelled. No Christmas this year, kids. Yeah, so you didn't get it in, and we pretty much spent the whole time not quite getting it in. Well, although there was a moment where I thought I'd been to the bathroom, I came back,

and there was a lot of commotion going on. I was like, oh, my goodness, this has happened. He got it! He got it, Ben! I just got it! The hole in one, the kids will tell you. He got it! He got it!

He got it! He got it! He got it! No way! Did you really? Yeah. Holy shit, I won. No, I didn't.

That's what it sounds like when 60 people lie to your face. Even children. I even dragged children into my web 60 people lie to your face. Even children. I even drag children into my web of lies. Hey, kids, tell them. Kids will tell them. Yeah, you got it. So 1,000 golf balls. We left Taupo a little bit dejected, a little bit sore,

but we're now positive that we've got 10 grand to give away next. And if anything, we left Taupo with 1,000 golf balls in the lake. What a wonderful gift. What a wonderful gift. What a wonderful gift. So next we give away 10 grand. Oh, jeez. This is exciting. We're going to make a random draw,

draw out a number for a ball and someone will be winning 10 grand next. Maybe we're going to change someone's life. Or change someone's Monday at least. What? I said life. You scaled it back to Monday? All right.

Let's meet in the middle. A life-changing call is next. Remember to double pump the virgals. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. This is very exciting. You keep talking over the music. Of course, we went on a mission

to get a hole-in-one in Taupo. We hit a thousand balls into the lake. Pretty much went to the lake. A couple of times we missed the lake, which is very hard to do. Hit the pontoon a few times, a couple of bounces around. We got close, but we didn't quite get the $10,000 prize money. But Boss Todd has come through with $10,000 today to give away.

That's because he is a wonderful human being with a big heart and quite a big investigation taking place, workplace investigation as to where that money's gone. But right now it's about to go to one of the 1,000 registered people. We've just drawn out a number at random, and then we're going to call this person up. They've won 10 grand. Hello, Amy speaking.

Amy. Yes? It's Tiger Woods here and Golfy McGolfface. How are you? Did you not think of another golfer? No. No, no, no. So I ended up with Golfy McGolfface.

That's all right. How are you, Amy? I'm good, thank you. How are you? We're going all right. It's John Owen being here from the hits, if you hadn't worked out. It's not Golfing McGulf facing Tiger Woods. No, I figured out who you guys were.

How was your weekend? Yeah, it was good. I got sick, but it was good. Okay. Listen, you know, there's a reason that I got into radio. Yes. And it's moments like this. I know, Ben, you got into radio for the babes.

What if I was? We've got different agendas. Don't stitch me up. This will be used on a live video or something. I got into it for the heartfelt moments. Hey, our moral compasses, they sit slightly differently. Whatever. Anyway, baby voice. Don't. This needs to be

a nice moment for both of us. Okay. Amy. Yes. Are you sitting down? No, I'm standing. Okay, do you want to sit down or do you want to stand up? How do you want to do it? I'll stand up.

Okay. Can you sit down? Oh, okay, I'll sit down. Yeah. Now stand up again. Stand up again. Yeah. Okay, and do that 10 times.

Amy, you were ball number 793, is that correct? Yes, I was. Well, we have just drawn that out of the drawer. Oh, my God. And you have won $10,000. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

The boys are here with me who also were in that show. $10,000, how's that feel? Oh, my God, amazing. Thank you so God. Amazing. Thank you so much. Bye. Chuck us on to the collateral. Chuck them.

And how are you going, boys? Good. $10,000. $10,000. That probably doesn't mean anything to them. But they're so excited. No. What are you going to do with it? I guess you just found

out you're one team grand. Any thoughts on what you're going to spend it on? I'd love to take the boys down south so I think we'll go down south and go on a family holiday. Good on you, Amy. Thank you so much for being part of this wonderful journey. Thank you guys so

much. You're amazing. Yeah, now that means you're contractually obliged to listen to us until the end of time okay we'll make that commitment I'm happy for that okay that's good to know you're well done

you're well deserved 10 grand coming your way awesome thank you so much that was awesome that was a nice moment wasn't it 10 grand

yeah why do you sound surprised oh no it felt good not many nice moments on this show serving bowls of lolulz for breakfast. Actual lulz may not be served.

It's Jono and Ben on the heads. Not today, but in a week's time, we've got a new show starting on TV and Z2. It's called Dog Almighty. We're looking for New Zealand's most talented dog. Then I left the TV on overnight, by accident fell asleep the TV on, and then I woke up to the sound of my own voice

promoting the show, and that is terrifying. So I feel very sorry for people who have to wake up listening to our voices on the radio every morning. It was a traumatic experience at 3am in the morning. There's 100 grand up for grabs for the most talented dog, which is pretty exciting. Because the dogs, they all love that money, Ben. You know dogs.

Dogs love spending cash. Our career has literally gone to the dogs now and it's to start next week. But a story I got told over the weekend made me laugh. A family friend of ours, I was talking to, she's probably an older lady, probably boomery, but maybe a little bit older. A wonderful stereotype in there.

Good stuff. I was talking to her son and he was like, oh, mum. Mum had a shocker. So she loves her dog. She lives with her dog. Dogs are a big part of her life. And she noticed her dog was, he was washing his body a shocker. So she loves her dog. She lives with her dog. Dog's a big part of her life. And she noticed her dog was, he was washing his body a little bit. And she was like, oh, maybe this might be a scratch.

Sometimes they wash themselves. They clean themselves other times if they've got a wound or something. And she was like, oh, my God, the dog. She had a look. She's like, oh, my God, there's a little bit of a, there's a cut. There's a wound. Right. So the dog was licking itself.

She started panicking. And she was like, oh, my God, this is not good. She rang up the vet she's like, my dog's been injured, what do I do? And they were like, oh, we'll bring the dog down we'll see if we can see him straight away. So she got the dog in the car, she drove down to the vet all in a panic, she's like, the dog, because yeah, it's such a massive part of her life, brings it into the vet

and takes it into where the vet was doing the little diagnosis and she's like, he's like, yeah, underneath it's licking hair and the guy looked and he was like, yeah, underneath it's licking hair and the guy looked at me and he's like, do you know what that is? She's like, what? It's his male dog and that's his,

I'm not going to complete this here, this is what the vet said, but that's his, the pink, that's, yeah, right, okay. Dog's fine. If anything, he's happy.

He's the opposite of what you thought he was. Oh, my God. Okay, thank you. Again, these are one of these things that we need to tell dogs that it's not okay to do in public. Right, in front of people. Yeah, and so she was, I guess, in a way relieved that there was nothing wrong with the dog,

but also quite humiliated that she had taken the dog down to the vet. We had to do the same thing with you at the office, didn't we? He needs to go to A&E. It turned out I was just... No, no. Eggs for breakfast. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Big week in New Zealand.

Yes, the election Saturday. And leading into the election, Jono and Ben present Question Time. It would have been good if you did that in surround sound with me, buddy. Question Time. We're going to ask all of your favourite politicians the questions that everyone else is too afraid to ask. Because probably they've got better questions. Let's be honest. Now, joining us in the studio to a man who, well, he's got a controversial bill, I guess you could say.

He's potentially wanting to end people's lives. At one stage, he wanted to end the taxpayer funding for our TV show, so he's used to killing off old, tired things. David Seymour, welcome to the studio. How are you? I'm fantastic. It's always so great to see you guys making an honest buck and keeping people entertained. You like to keep everyone in line, don't you? Even when we had

a TV show, you're like, oh, they shouldn't be getting funding these guys. Hey, look, well, that's actors, you know, holding them all accountable, even comedians. Yeah, no, we were earning unhonest bucks then. Now we're on the private corporate dollar. Now, Epsom, you had 13,000 doors you knocked on? Yep.

What does David Seymour say when he knocks on your door and you open the door and there's David Seymour? Well, I just say, look, hi, Jono, hi, Ben. I'm your local member of Parliament and I'm just here to hear your views and what's on your mind, any issues that other politicians may have missed. I'm really interested in what you're thinking.

Oh, right, and I love it in this hypothetical situation like Burs and Ernie, we're living together. Now, David, we want to play you. This was, I think, maybe one of the first videos where the New Zealand public got to know you. This is when you were first starting out, and this was a campaign video of you in various locations around the Epsom electorate.

Have a listen to this. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. I'm David Seymour.

I'd like to be your MP. So I think it's only fair I should introduce myself. A lot of highs. And very scary music. I think someone's added the music in later. That music wasn't an original part of it. We're trying to find it on the internet. I think it's been taken down.

Yeah, I know. Well, my old buddy campaign team took it out in the 2017 election. I was so pissed off. It's one of my best work. Well, that went viral, didn't it? Because you were around all over Auckland going, hi, hi, hi. Was that the plan?

Was the plan to get out there with a viral video or? No, the best viral stuff is made when you don't even expect to. Can it be a lonely existence as a politician? You say, you know, you're going around knocking on doors by yourself. I imagine there's a lot of time in motels and hotels by yourself. Does it get lonely at times? Yeah, I think that's a fair comment. One of the things about it that is probably different from

most jobs, but not all, it's probably a bit more like being a pilot or an air crew. You don't sort of reliably live in the same place. So when it comes to like, you know, your relationships, your friendships, even your supermarket shopping, you know, your relationships, your friendships, even your supermarket shopping, you sort of can't get into a routine. So, you know, not complaining, but if people are interested in, you know, what it's like,

that's one of the really standout features of it. And it seems like a seven day a week job. Yeah, do you ever switch off? I mean, every time we've rung you on the radio, no matter what it is, you're in the middle of interviews with other networks and you answer your phone. Oh yeah, but I mean, it's who you've been though.

I mean, you know, like... You never want to miss that opportunity. Yeah, like if it was someone else, I'd just say, look, I'm busy. Now, your one-liners, your zingers that we always hear on the news, I think we've got an example of one or two here. The Prime Minister refuses to blame anyone. Now she's blaming the trickiness of a virus. Well, no one's talked to me like that since I was at Horror Horror Kindy in 1987.

Great zinger. Great zinger. Did you pre-write that? It was a great kindy too. Do you come to those news bites and you're like, I've got a line here, or do they just sort of pop into your head? You've got to think about it because ultimately our job is representation so you've got to take what people are feeling and what they want from the country and then get it into

a package that you can thread through the needle of a soundbite. That was a really long soundbite. Normally you get less than that. We've got an eight second one here. I'll answer the question sunshine when I get to it alright? Sorry Grandpa, is she aware of the reasons why? What's the penis? Sorry, Grandpa. Is she aware? Sorry, Grandpa.

Winston Peters. Sorry, Grandpa. I mean, did you guys talk after that? Oh, look, he's just such a dick. I mean, why would you? Well, he is.

I mean, he's an example of someone who really needed to retire gracefully. He sat in Parliament too long for any good he's been doing lately, so now I don't have any time for the guy.

So you actually do not get along with Winston Peters? Well, I mean, why would you talk to him? I mean, he's just ultimately just an odd old man, you know. Guitar? You play the guitar? Yeah, not well. Rock well? Not when there's other people around. We have a guitar in the studio, you wouldn't play it?

Oh, yeah, I'd give it a go, but it won't be... We've got a sexy Anika Moore's guitar as well. No, I love her. It's finely tuned for a... I don't know if it is. We don't play. Okay, here we go. David Seymour guitar.

South of the river, he's stopping everything. Oh! And he's blowing, he's in trouble for a time. Yeah, he knows what he's doing. I feel alright when you hear the music. David Seymour. Talents. Lovely to spend time with you, David.

When all is said and done, when your political career is over, what do you want the New Zealand public to remember about you? Oh, just making a positive contribution. A lot of politicians do nothing and some do damage. But if we can improve a few laws, then that's better than most. And it puts something back to what I inherited, being so lucky to be born into this country. I think if you can add a little bit to what you got

and leave it for the next generation, then that's all you can hope for. We'll play some Nirvana. We'll take you out on this. David Seymour, there we go. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Now, last week we went to Taupo.

We hit 1,000 golf balls over Friday and Saturday, the two of us. Spoiler alert, we didn't get one of those 1,000 balls into the hole. No. Very close. Hit the pin a couple of times. Yeah, you hit the pin a couple of times. Bounced around. You were bouncing around the hole.

It's a pontoon if you haven't done it before. It's a lot of fun, but it's very hard to obviously get a ball to land inside a golf hole. 10 grand is what you win if you get the ball in there. It's all luck, isn't it, really? It's luck. And I never want to see any little white balls ever again for the remainder of my life. That's why I'm never going to be looking down

for the remainder of my time on this earth, Ben Boyce. I've had enough with golf. Had enough. We had a lot of fun. We were hitting the golf balls. And just after 8 o'clock today, we got 10 grand to give away. Even though we didn't get it, Boss Todd has kindly come through with 10 grand.

Very exciting stuff. So on Friday night, we went out for dinner following the festivities and Ben Boyce, a couple of unusual things happened at the establishment that we're at. Yeah, it was fun. It was fun meeting, talking to people. It was. You took part in a running race.

Yeah, I took part in a running race. What was it, a 100 metre sprint? I sprinted part in a running race yeah what was it a 100m sprint a sprint there and back and I got beaten by quite a lot yeah right why I think it was I don't know

if I can ask the obvious question yeah I know it was apparently a guy had to do it it was on his list of things to do they were over on a trip so I was like I don't

I was like okay running race not a fast runner and I didn't win I would have put you to be what could you do the 100m in 10 seconds 11

or no yeah maybe 12, I don't know. 12? Yeah, I don't know, maybe around there. You'd be quite nimble on your feet. No, not the, I mean, okay, I'm okay, but not, you know, I don't know why I did a running race, but the guy seemed like a nice guy, so I took part in a running race. And speaking of nice guys, I got to talk to this lovely gentleman

and he's like, oh, I've just bought a Tesla. I was like, oh, that's nice. It's a flash car. Yeah, flash car. And he's like, you want to come for a ride in it. I was like, oh, that's nice. It's a flash car. Yeah, a flash car. And he's like, you want to come for a ride or not? I was like, okay. Now, at this point, I thought I was talking to someone from our work. I thought he was part of the work group.

So I was like, yes, strange man. I would love to go for a ride in the Tesla. Stranger danger, not an issue for me. Because you're like, yeah, you're like. I know. And so then we ended up driving around. And this man's Tesla for about 45 minutes. Well, where's John at?

I don't know. I think he's with Elon Musk. And then I returned and he was awesome. It was a lovely car. Very silent. Aren't they? It's like you're sitting

in the future when you're in Tesla. I've never been in one before. You get back and you're like, yeah, the guy from work. And you guys are like, what guy from work? He works for the same company as we work for. Yeah.

And I never saw him again. So what, you just got out from the bar, you went for a drive around and then you came back? Yeah, disappeared. And I'll never say it again. Just disappeared. Maybe it was Elon Musk. Just drove away very silently from my life.

So yeah, that's what happens. So that went up as a learning experience. Before you go for a ride in a Tesla with a stranger, just ask, is he part of the work group? If he's part of the company, I'm not going to double down on that. Just like a chocolate milkshake, only white and disappointing. It's Jono and Ben on the hits.

I was at a petrol station over the weekend and nature was calling, Ben. Ring, ring, hello. It's nature here. And I thought, oh, I better go try and use the facilities in the service station. There's no happier place on earth than a petrol station toilet. Tell you what. Although we stopped off at one, a BP,

on the way back from Taupo and we both went in and you were just like, what a lovely bathroom. It was. You know, like I'll be into some petrol stations. I'll be into some bleep.

But this is a lovely bathroom. Stop talking to me. I'm going to start a social media account. Concentrating. Jono's Petrol Station Toilets of New Zealand. It was lovely. It was, really was.

But anyway, the one that I needed to go into on Sunday. Why don't you just use your home toilet? Stop going to petrol stations. I literally drive to petrol stations just to use the toilet. But I thought that the toilet, someone was in it,

because it had the lock, you know, how it's got engaged and it had engaged on it. And this lady came up behind me with her kids and they were obviously on a car trip and the kids needed to stop off. They looked very full. They're quite jumpy. You know, when you're sort of holding parts of your body and you're jumping up and down, fidgety. Very fidgety. I'm like, oh, we just came to wait because there's someone in there. And I'm next in line because, well, that's how it works. That's how the system works right

and so we're waiting for it's honestly about 10 minutes and I was like what is going on in there you want to give people their space you do but then you're almost like knocking on the door yeah but then you almost say I'm frightened to go in after a 10-minute stint and anyway I went up to it and I like kind of twisted the door handle and it wasn't, there was no one in there. But I just stopped. And so I was like, oh God, how do I get out of this? So I just went in there and I just sat in there for 10 minutes. Oh no.

And then by the time I got out, they had gone. I felt I was such a knob. You're going to have to wait here, there's someone in there. It says engaged. But here's a public service announcement. When you've left, turn over the engaged thing so we all know.

Yeah, no, it's a good point. Yeah, no, some low-level broadcasters don't have to blatantly lie to poor children who are just busting to go. Hey, you've got toothpaste on the side of your mouth. It's Jono and Ben on my heads.

Time for the big news. Small town. Town, town, town, town, town. Today we're looking for some big news out of Blenheim. There's a guy there who's got a Toyota Corolla. Town, town, town, town, town. And he's painted the Toyota Corolla to look like a swan dry. Yeah, I don't know at what stage he regretted doing that.

I love a swan dry, Ben. You do. You always give me grief for sending it to the dry cleaners, don't you? Yeah. I got told off at the old radio station, how do you dry clean a swan dry, Ben. You do. You always give me grief for sending it to the dry cleaners, don't you? Yeah. I got told off at the old radio station, how dare you dry clean a swan dry. You're meant to climb inside a sheep and use that as a washing machine, aren't you? Exactly.

And then climb out and let the wind dry. But we're actually joined by the guy who's selling his swan dry themed car on Trade Me. Mike, how are you? Oh, not too bad, not too bad. Swan dry car. That's the one. Making big news all over New Zealand for this. This took you a couple of months to create, right? Unfortunately, yes. So what gave you the idea? Obviously a big fan of Swan Dry? Yeah, well, you know, why should I just

confine myself to a hat and jacket, you know? I thought, well, you know, why not do the car too? And what colour is the car? Because, you know? I thought, well, you know, why not do the car too? And what colour is the car? Because, you know, Swan Drive's got the very recognisable cross-square pattern going on. Yeah, it's the classic red and black lumberjack. Love the red and black lumberjack. Do you know, I've worn a couple of Swan Drives for many years.

We went to field days once and I got swept up in the merch madness. And I thought, I could be a farmer and I bought two swan dry. You do it. You persisted though. Ever since I've just worn them and at our old job,

I was the swan dry guy. Everyone knew it. No one played in my field. Well, mate, you don't have ownership of swan dry. Then I come over here, Michael. You won't believe.

I come over here, producer Humphrey, who does come from a rural background. Yeah, he's got rural background. You're from Auckland. You're from Auckland. He's also a swan dry guy. I see no shame in it.

No, but he should be wearing it. Producer Humphrey deserves to wear it. You dry clean yours, Jono. Jono dry cleans his swan dry. So, you know, that sums it up. So your swan dry car is for sale right now, I understand. It is, it is. Why are you selling it? I mean, it seems like you worked hard on this thing. You're getting. It is, it is. Why are you selling it?

I mean, it seems like you worked hard on this thing. You're getting a lot of attention for it. Why are you selling it? I actually saved up and bought my dream car. What was your dream car? Well, it's an 80s classic, two-door, Ferrari red, Honda City. I thought you were going to say Ferrari.

Ferrari red. Ferrari red, yeah. Honda City. I thought you were going to say Ferrari. Ferrari Red. Ferrari Red, yeah. Honda City. Not a Ferrari, but it's a got-his-dream car. Same colour as one, though. And that's the main thing, a rusty red. Now, did you regret painting your car swan-dry themed?

Yes and no, I guess. I could have just saved a lot of time and just touched up the fading colours. It would have been a lot quicker and a lot less hassle, I guess. Oh, so this is the true story. It's just covering a lot of rust. Alright, so a Toyota Corolla with the

questionable tartan paint job. It's for sale right now. What do you want from it? I'll just put 2k near offer. I, yeah? I'm not looking for much. How low will you go? As I said, 2K or near offer. I leave the ball in those people's courts.

He's put his price out there already. Yeah, that's not how it works, is it? He's gone low enough he's talking to us on the hit, so there you go. Hey, really nice catching up with you and all the best on getting this great iconic car sold. Yeah, well, thanks, lads. You enjoy your new Ferrari red-coloured car. We'll do.

New Zealand's breakfast. Just don't eat them. They're chewy. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Of course, we've been doing the breakfast show for a few months, getting up early in the morning. The other day, Jono, you mentioned how you accidentally put on what instead of roll-on deodorant? Insect repellent. Insect repellent. Insect repellent.

Absolutely stink, but I tell you what, the mozzies have been keeping their distance. Yeah, you'll notice there's no mosquitoes flying around my armpits as we speak, Ben Boyce. I laugh when you told me this. I was like, oh, what sort of idiot would do that? You did laugh. I think you even said what sort of idiot.

Your head looks like roll-on deodorant. That's what I said. Yeah, you do. It's a good impersonation of yourself as well. I love how you're impersonating yourself, but then you put on a different voice of yourself. I know. Like I was a manta. I don't know how

that worked. But yeah, you're right, because you had roll-on insect repellent next to your deodorant, so that's how you put it on. These things happen in life. You misuse products from time to time. And I did it this morning. Oh, you did it this morning. Who would do that? What'd you do? I had some, it was in the drawer, it was antiseptic cream like Bepanthen or something. Oh, Bepanthen, yeah. Yeah, and I put that on. It was, you idiot. Who would do that? What did you do? I had some, like, it was in the drawer. It was antiseptic cream, like Bepanthen or something.

Oh, Ben Panthen, yeah. Yeah, and I put that on. It was, you know, it's toothpaste shaped. Oh. Put it on the toothbrush. Oh, your teeth do have quite a creamy, infection-free complexion this morning. But I was like, what sort of monster puts that in the drawer where we put the, it's like people at work that put the permanent marker next to the whiteboard markers.

Like, or underneath a whiteboard. You're like, who would do this? Who would put a permanent marker here? Well, I mean, on both those occasions it does require the human just to read what they're holding. Oh yeah. It's a simple case of just looking down and going, am I about to brush my teeth with infection cream? Yeah. I used to rub

Ben Pantham on your bottom, didn't I, back in the day? Just to keep you... Stop my nappy rash. That's how much I love you. So we want to open these lines. These lines. These fine, fine lines. 0800 that's the telephone number. 4487. That's if you like texting as your preferred

method of communication. Yeah. Misused products. Accidental misused products. What if you're accidentally misused? And don't forget, every caller that gets on air this morning will get one of our Fiji, $200 Fiji prize packs. We'll go to the phones, head to Nelson. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Lisa!

Morning. What an introduction that was, Lisa. Yeah, it was great. I hope you bring the noise made after that intro. When did you misuse a product, Lisa? It was back in high school. I was going to our school ball and I was running late,

like super flustered. Went to grab the hairspray to set my hair and turns out I accidentally grabbed the fly spray and it did not do the job well. I stunk and I had to obviously take a shower

to get rid of the smell. I was even more late. And quite flammable too, I imagine. I know. Dangerous. But did any flies come near you throughout that whole evening? Absolutely not. That's right.

They stayed away because you more tinned your hair. Well done, Lisa. Well done. We're going to flick you out a $200 Fiji price packet to celebrate the 50th anniversary of Fiji Independence Day, all right? Awesome. Thanks. What a wonderful thing to celebrate.

Kurt, you're here. Welcome. How are you? Good, thanks. You too. Yeah, we're doing really well on a Monday morning. It's lovely to hear your voice. What product did you misuse? Oh, well, I had a real sweet tooth when I was a kid, and yeah, my stepdad was like, oh, here, have this white pebble, and as I went to put it in my mouth, he cracked up laughing, and he was like, nah, just kidding, it's a dog-worming pill.

It's a dog-worming pill. He was a dog handler for customs, I guess. It was the nearest joke thing he had on hand, but he nearly got me. How were the worms after that? Worm-free? Fabulous. Yeah, that's good.

What a monstrous prank, I love it. Thank you so much. We're going to give you a Fiji prize pack valued at $250. Or $200. Sorry, take 50 off that. Sorry, $200. Buller to you, Kim. Thank you very much. Brad, welcome. You're on the air. Hey, how's it going, guys? We're doing well. It's lovely to hear you, Brad. What product did you accidentally misuse? It was what I we're doing well. It's lovely to hear you, Brad. What product did you accidentally misuse? It was what I thought was mouthwash. It turned out to be the hand foam soap. Oh, right.

So it was in the same sort of type container? Yeah, it was. It was a refill container. It was around the time my second child was born. The wife was in hospital. I was rushing to get out the house to go to the hospital and see them and I grabbed the mouthwash, took a swig and as soon as it hit the tongue it was like instant gag reflex.

Instead of a minty fresh breath, a soapy fresh breath. I guess it still did the job though. Turns out the hospital foaming like a rabies laden dog. Thanks Brad. You got a Fiji price tag, bud. 200 bucks, well done. Remember the fad of putting toothpaste on your zits? Thanks, Brad. You got a Fiji price, bud. You did it at 200 bucks. Well done. Awesome.

Thank you so much, guys. Remember the fad of putting toothpaste on your zits? Oh, pitbulls. Yeah, I used to do that. It was a thing for a while there. Everyone was like, oh, you need to do this. Yeah. My father and also when you've got a sore throat,

he always gets me to gargle Dettol as well. He's trying to off you. Yeah. He's like, now swallow it. Swallow it. Really, just a little bit. Not recommended Morning, it's Jono and Ben on the heads

She had dreams and aspirations of one day Reading for one news But hey kids, dreams do not always come true And sometimes you end up reading gossip bulletins About crappy celebrities for Jono and Ben Thanks so much There's Juliet with Spy Now James Corden has said that he waited two years about crappy celebrities for Jono and Ben. Thanks so much. Here's Juliet with Spy.

Now, James Corden has said that he waited two years after the Late Late Show first started before he bought furniture. So him and his wife and his young kids at the time moved from the UK to the US to do this show. And he had this mindset that he was going to get fired. He's like, it's not going to last. Like, there's no point buying furniture. Because if we buy furniture and I get fired, we're just going to have to sell it. He's like, it's not going to last. There's no point buying furniture. Because if we buy furniture

and I get fired, we're just going to have to sell it. And so two years down the track, his wife eventually said, can we get... Can we stop eating dinner on the floor? I'm sick of sleeping on the bathroom floor, James. I know. And so eventually, they then bought furniture. He's like, right, okay, maybe I'm not going to get fired. But yeah, I think

they must have just maybe rented furniture or something. Isn't it amazing, even at that level, you've still got the insecurity of job security. Happens to everyone in life, doesn't it? Yeah, can I comment? They're quite brutal, particularly, oh yeah, we know that from the TV game, but yeah. And I think, especially over in America, they don't give people much of a chance if it's not working right. But he was quite a big star in the UK previous to heading to the States.

He hosted a, it was sort of like a game or two half sports show. And he's been an actor in many other shows, yeah. Yeah. So listen, you feel that he may have had enough coffers in the bank to fork out for a couch. Yeah.

I know. Not like he can't afford it. Oh, well, good on him. Well done. He's very successful. You love him. You love him. I love him.

One of the nicest people. That we've never met. Yeah, that's right. He could be Alan's very successful. You love him. You love him. I love him. One of the nicest people. That we've never met. Yeah, that's right. He could be Ellen Degeneres-ing backstage for all we know. Evil Ellen. Evil Ellen. Story's not even about her, but we always end up saying Evil Ellen. I wonder what monstrous things she's doing right now.

Oh, gosh, I know. I think she probably just kidnapped a kitten from a baby. Oh, no. I don't want to think about that. And Simon Cowell, back in August, he broke his back after falling off his new e-bike, which was a horrendously fast e-bike. I think, what is it?

It went from zero to 100 kilometres an hour in what? Three seconds. Something like that, yeah. It's too much bike for a boomer. Yeah, I know. And so he had surgery and everything like that. He's now walking, which is shocking, 10,000 steps a day and swimming every day.

After breaking his back, I don't even walk 10,000 steps a day. Do you guys? I haven't even walked 10,000 steps in my life. I know. That's amazing. It's 10,000 steps. Have you ever had a fit bit?

I think that's the goal, isn't it? Yeah. Not to have a fit bit. They say you should be reaching 10,000 steps a day and a lot of people do aim for that. And your phone also tells you how many steps you're getting in a day as well. Mine's like 3,000. It's so bad.

But you're training for a marathon at the moment. Your steps must be up there, mate. Oh, I haven't gone for a run in a wee while. Don't be talking down your steps. Maybe I go through peaks and troughs, you know? Yeah. Ben Boyce, how many steps are you taking a day? I don't actually know.

I reckon you'd be a 10,000 step. I like pacing. I like when I'm on the phone, I'm a pacer. He's a pacer. Yes, you are. Even when he's sleeping, he's pacing. Just pacing and worrying about what could be happening. I don't like taking a phone call if I'm restricted.

You've got to walk. I like walking. I don't know why. I do a lot of walking. That drives Jen, my wife, bonkers. Me walking around on the phone. You just end up doing laps of the lounge in the kitchen. People get really annoyed because you come and talk to your wife again

and your back again. You're like, all right, mate. See little pockets in the conversation. Hey, nice work, Juliet. That was very professional. I can't believe you didn't make it on one news. Same, neither. For more spy, you can head to thehits.co.nz.

Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. I was talking to my dad, and he's got some friends that are quite, you know, they like to say, frugal. You know, they don't like to overspend. And they've got like a deal with their power company where they get one hour of free power a day.

Well, the power hour. Sounds like a radio promo we should do on the hits. The power hour. Join us for the 4 p.m. power hour. All the powerful ballads. Between 8 and the hits. The power hour. Join us for the 4pm power hour. All the powerful ballads. Between 8 and 9pm, I think they've got their free, so they get free power through that hour, and they really maximise it.

Like, they will, everything that they can put on. Oh, they're pushing the power grid to its limits. Toaster. Yeah. Our phones, they put it on. The electric blanket, they only put on between 8 and 9pm, and they turn it straight off. Loads of washing, dryer, like, everything you can put they only put on between 8 and 9pm and they turn it straight off. Loads of washing,

dryer, like everything you can put on. Turn on grandma's life support, turn it off after the power hour, it's done. Nine o'clock. Anything they can do within that hour,

they try and do. Which is why I thought it was quite impressive. That is very impressive. You would like the power hour. Yeah. You loved saving. I didn't even know it was a thing,

but it's obviously a thing with my own power company. Okay, so we're going to open up this cash saving tips. Ben Boyce, as we've always said, tightest bottom in radio

metaphorically and literally. It's a wonderful tush. And if you've got a tip that you can use to, you can deliver to help him save some cash like the power hour then 0800 the hits.

Another big one for me, Ben, I know you've got a dog. Yeah. Teach your dog to use the toilet so you can save on plastic bags when you're walking. I suppose you're right.

Yeah, kind of works I guess. Another tip, don't leave the house and don't eat anything. Then you don't have to pay for food. Eat your stomach lining. That's what you do every day. Another cash saving tip for you there. If you've got an actual good cash-saving tip for us this morning, every caller that gets on the air will get a $200 Fiji prize pack

to help us celebrate the 50th anniversary of Fiji Independence Day. G'day there, Nicole. How it's Pocono this morning? Good. A bit over-cost, but good. What's your cash- cash saving tip for us? We've just chosen to break our current mortgage and refix at the current interest rate because they've dropped so much and we're saving $500 a month. That's actually like a proper one, not even a funny comical one. That's actually a really good tip. How much does it cost to break it though?

That's the question. It cost us about $8,000. So it wasn't cheap, but they put that onto your capital and I worked out we're saving, by breaking it we're saving $16,000 so we're still gaining $8,000 even though we've chosen to break it. Wow, look at you Nicole!

Thank you for that. Fancy mortgage saving tips there. $200 Fiji price pack coming your way because you got it on the air. Thanks for your call. Thank you. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast Deb. Ben wanted cash saving tips Fiji prize pack coming your way because you got it on the air. Thanks for your call. Thank you. Very good on you. Debbie, we'll head to Raglan. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Deb, Ben wanted cash-saving tips.

And you're going to come and deliver, aren't you? Or not. I'll just keep saying words until Debbie picks it up. Deborah. Hi. There we go. Hi, how are you? Yeah, good.

I tell you what, this has been a real fumbly start, but I've enjoyed every minute of it, Deb. What's your cash-saving tip, matey? Okay, so mine is an energy one, where instead of running the hot tap for 10 minutes before it gets hot, is you just boil the jug, which costs you about 10 cents, instead of about a dollar to run your bloody tap to do your dishes, which is amazing.

It saves a lot during the day with children, let me tell you. That's quite good. These are actually, like, legitimate ones. I thought they were going to be real, like, funny, but they're really good. I'm going to start boiling them. Yeah, thank you, Deborah. You've got to get a Fiji prize pack because you know what? It's our favourite day of the year.

We're celebrating 50 years since Fiji's independence. I love this better than Christmas. That's right. That's why you came to work this morning. That's amazing. Thank you. $200 Fiji prize pack. Well done.

And we're going to take one more. Hey, Charlotte, on the phone. Drury, come200 Fiji price pack. Well done. We'll take one more. Charlotte on the phone. Drury, come on in. You're on the air. Good morning, guys. How are we? Yeah, we're doing well. What's your cash-saving tip, Shaz?

So every single day I bring my gear to work and I shower at work every morning, so I'm saving on water. Smart. Oh, yes. That is really good. What if you don't have a shower at work? Can you use the tap in the kitchen or something?

I'm very fortunate that I do have a shower at work. Yeah, right, so you don't have to shower in the kitchen. No, I'm not in the kitchen. Yeah, that's a good tip. A friend of mine used to say he used to like going to the bathroom at work because technically you're getting paid to do it. You know? Yeah.

Yeah, like they're paying me. So that was always, he always felt like that was the way. He'd disappear for like half an hour. Yeah, come back and go, I'm paid to do that. Hey, thanks for your me, it's on, you know. So that was always, he always felt like that was the way. What, did he disappear for like half an hour? Yeah, come back and go, I paid to do that. Hey, thanks for your cash-saving tips, guys. Ben, I think that was a really successful segment, mate. It was, thank you. I'd love to see it again on the show.

Thank you, Tom. I enjoyed it. I don't know if I'm taking the piss or not. I enjoyed it. Juliet, did you enjoy it? I thoroughly enjoyed it. You're just enjoying Fiji Independence Day, my friend. More painful than your alarm clock.

It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Our next guest is a viral internet star you may have seen recreating classic movie scenes online during lockdown, but you may be surprised to know he's also a boxer too. He's a boxer as well? Yeah, Joseph Parker. How's it going? Good.

I am a boxer. You are? Yeah, I am. I think they're playing about even at the moment. Influencer and boxer. But all seriousness, huge moment for New Zealand sport. This is the Stonewood Homes Joseph Parke Jr. Far Fight happening December 11th.

Tickets are available right now on Ticketmaster. Ticketmaster, there you go. Paper views on Spark Sport. There you go. Are you more nervous about this than the previous fights? I don't really get nervous. I do. Nerves are good,

but if you train hard, which I have been doing, I've been training every day since my last fight in February, so they're always going to be nervous, but not as much as before when I didn't train as hard or didn't do things as right. Yeah, so when nerves come, generally the body sometimes likes to

before you go out, to extract some fluid. How do you do that with boxing gloves on? Yeah, that's a good point. That must be hard going for a nervous pee before boxing. No, I'm thankful to have my brother John

and say, hey John. John's like, all right, I'm ready to go. John's a good guy. No one's working harder than John. Now you've fought, Junior Farr, four times.

Four times as amateurs. Yeah, and you've won two each. So this is almost like the decider. This is the decider. This is like the finale. Yeah. Like, he thinks he's the best in New Zealand.

I know I'm the best in New Zealand. Yeah, this is... The trash talk is always good in boxing too. And I saw on the news, you two were facing off at the press conference. For me, that'd be quite awkward. I'm like, are we going to kiss now? Do you ever think about that as a tactic?

Like, go into kiss. Throw him off guard. I mean, never once? Like go into kiss, throw them off guard. I mean, never once crossed my mind. Yeah, no, try it next one. Try it next one. Throw them off the guard, mate. Yeah, because now you have been doing the lockdown videos, which have been great.

Are we going to see more fancy footwork? More dance moves from you in the ring? Dance moves. You know, the videos are just, you know, to pass time and keep spirits up. But I've been training hard. What Jost is saying is, I'm not an internet star, Ben. I'm a boxer.

Yeah, first and foremost. Ben was like, we've got social media superstar, Jost. He's a boxer? Yeah. You guys should be on Undercard. Now, this is what he said to us while the song was playing. No one wants to see us fight. I do.

Do you want us to destroy the good name of boxing? Two guys in the ring going, ow, ow. I do. Do you want us to destroy the good name of boxing? Two guys in the ring going, ow, ow. Stop that. Nah, I gotcha. Do you ever do that in a fight

when you get hit and you're like, ouch. Not really, but sometimes they talk to you and you're like, that wasn't hard.

Hit me again. Do you talk to each other? Oh right, you do. Is that all you got? Really? Sledging? Well yeah, when you're in a clinch, ha ha. How are you that all you got? Oh, really? Sledging? Oh, yeah. And you're like in the English?

Ha-ha. How are you talking and working out at the same time? When I'm on a treadmill at the gym, I'm like... Joseph Parker with us. The Stonewood Homes fight is coming up December 11th. You can get your tickets right now from Ticketmaster. Now, you're a dad now as well, which is pretty cool. Now, and also good at fighting.

I've got my daughters to make up a couple of, like, sibling fights. If you just put the headphones on, they're going to ask you as a dad what your advice is solving these fights. Because obviously you're great in the boxing ring,

sorting out fights there. These are ones, the sibling fights. Joseph Parker, I want to practice my flips on the tramp, but my sister wants to go on the tramp too, and I can't do my flips when she's on there. What do I do? Okay, what do we do? How do we sort this out?

Buy another trampoline. Oh, Dad! Oh my gosh! Oh, that's on me! This is meant to be you. Alright, next question. Another tramp coming for the girls. Pretend Dad draws a parka. Am I your favourite pretend child? My sister says fight for this. Alright, next question. Another tramp coming for the girls. Pretender Joseph Parker, am I your favourite

pretend child? My sister says she's a favourite pretend child. What do you do as a parent there if someone says am I your favourite?

You say, you are my favourite. You do? Yeah, but then if the other one asks you say, you are my favourite too. So you're not lying,

they're both your favourite but you say it at different times. Play them off against each other. Yeah, he's very good at sorting out fights, isn't he? Everyone knows they've got a favourite though, don't they? No one publicly goes on record and admits it. And finally, your final question for parent questions, sorting out fights.

Pretend that Joseph Parker, my sister says Junior Farr, has a reach advantage in the boxing ring, while I say you've got a far better jab. Who's going to win the fight? She's right. Seriously. Can I meet your daughter? She's totally right. You got the jab, you reckon?

He's got the reach and the height. I got the jab and I got the speed and I got the moves. He's got the moves and I tell you what Joseph Parker, you will be meeting his daughters when Ben buys them a new tramp. A new tramp a new tramp yeah he had to deliver

he had to bounce on the tramp we're very excited about this it's going to be a huge moment for New Zealand sport it'll be great to see you out there and great to have a crowd we're very lucky in New Zealand I can't wait to see you guys

on the undercut and here at the main event it's going to be a great night a lot of people will be there cheering for all of us all of us we will be in the same

change room preparing it's going to be a great night I'll help you go for your nervous pee okay not John alright Joseph Parker be the tune for all of us. All of us, yeah. We will be in the same change room preparing. It's going to be a great night. I'll help you go for your nervous pee. Okay. Not John, all right. Joseph, tell John he can be sidelined.

Great to catch up. We might see you December 11th. I'll see you there. Not a morning person. Sadly, neither of these two. It's Jono and Ben

on the hits. For Jono and Ben's 10K tee-off. Of course, our show, we did a bit of a road trip, didn't we, down to Taupo.

There's the world-famous Hole-in-One attraction. It sits about 100 metres on the lake on a pontoon. And we had, between us, Jono, 1,000 shots at trying to get the Hole-in-One to win $10,000 prize money is what you get if you get the Hole-in-One. And both our bodies very beaten up. This old rusty rig's beaten up and sore. I'm so old and tired, I feel like voting yes for David Seymour's bill.

Just to end it. Now, every ball we hit was allocated to a listener of the radio programme, but sometimes the listeners would come down and sort of watch us hit their ball, and it happened that... That added a lot of pressure. When you look someone in the eyes and they're like

this is my ball you could win me the money it creates quite the personal storyline. Well this lady that came down had her kids with her as well.

This is what happened. Emma has ball number 65. Jono, we're going to watch right now in front of Emma as you nail the hole in one for a 10 grand. Why would you do this to me?

Emma's brought her kids down here as well. Christmas is off and you don't get it. Christmas is cancelled. No Christmas this year, kids. So it didn't quite happen, but a year right. It was pretty awkward. She was there with three kids, like, oh, look at me.

Please get the ball in, my good sir. 10 grand. We started day two after hitting about 630 balls on day one. We started, you know, we thought, let's be positive. You know, let's start day two. We had a few hundred balls to go. There was still a chance. What happened?

You want to see a whole one? Well, if it comes in the right place, we're both talking over each other. All right. Let's go, Ben. Here we go. Positive. Positivity.

That's it. That's it. Done. That's it. That's it. That's it. Oh! Oh!

Oh! All right. Here we go. Day two. Day two. We're back. Here we go. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. All right. Here we go. Day two. Day two. We're back. Here we go. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. We're going home. That's not it. So the pontoon's 100-odd metres are out on the lake. There's three holes on there.

I felt like we did better on day two. We were hitting the flagpole a couple of times, bounced around the hole, bounced into one of the other spot prize holes and bounced out. So it felt like we were on great form. Oh, yeah, day one, sometimes we even missed the lake, which is hard to do. We hit it backwards into the motels across the road. But then you got me with quite a good one

because I went to the bathroom, you know, I had to whip away quickly. And when I came back, it was all sorts of commotion. It was quite exciting. He got it! He got it, Ben! He just got it! The hole in one,

the kids will tell you. He got it! He got it! He got it! No way! That's really? Yeah. Holy shit.

No, I didn't. So you didn't quite get it. We didn't. It was a little prank there, wasn't it? It was a little prank. Fun little prank. So 1,000 balls, we hit towards it. As didn't. It was a little prank there, wasn't it? It was a little prank. Fun little prank. So 1,000 balls we hit towards it.

As you said, Jono, we got close, but we didn't quite nail the hole of one, but that means... Now, what an extraordinary achievement. We managed to waste a huge amount of company resource and people's time and end up with absolutely no result, like the bloody flag referee number a few years ago.

Yeah. But we have got $1,000. Sorry, $1,000. Sorry, $1,000. Times that by 10, mate. That's wasting the company's time. We've got $10,000. There you go. That's what we're giving away this morning.

Our boss Todd is giving away 10 grand just after 8 o'clock. Like starting your day without your morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben on my heads. Scrolling through your feed. He is like the New Zealand Herald.co.nz of radio, mainly because he's plagiarised all the stories from the New Zealand Herald.co.nz of radio, mainly because he's plagiarised all the stories from the New Zealand Herald.co.nz. That's pretty true.

Ben Boyce with Scrolling Through Your Feet. Of course, the first All Blacks rugby game for a long time in New Zealand yesterday. The Wallabies took on the All Blacks in Wellington, and it ended in a 16-all draw. Wild end. It went on for like another nine or ten minutes. The Aussies, and you saw it, I don't need to explain it, I'll just do a shocking job of recapping it,

but it was very intense. Yeah, well, anyone could have really won that game at the end, but here's some of the highlights. McKenzie, quick hands. Now Barrett, Johnny Barrett for the corner. Oblakson. Now he gets it away to Corabetti. Corabetti for the corner corner Breezy ball has been lost

And it's flipped out And Dungunu driving What a game What a chess match A 16 all draw And that crowd booing They're having a great time As you said it was quite intense at the end

But not quite as intense for myself because I went to a friend's house to watch it and they had MySky, so we actually paused it at halftime and they had some dinner and then came back and watched it. So we were slightly delayed and then someone turned up a bit later on

to pick up their kids and go, how about that draw, eh? Not realising that we still had like 10 minutes left to go on the game. Mind you, more fool you. Who pauses and then... Yeah, I know. We shouldn't have. Could you not wait 10 minutes left to go on the game. Mind you, more fool you. Who pauses and then... Yeah, I know. Oh, we shouldn't have.

Could you not wait 10 minutes for dinner? Well, it actually would have turned out to be 20 minutes. Yeah, exactly. But hey, Riko Arnie, did you see the try that Riko Arnie almost got? Oh, yeah. Over the line. Yeah, but people say maybe he made up for it

because maybe we shouldn't have got the first try. He stood on the line, so maybe he was just like, oh, I shouldn't have. I'll let them have this one. Yeah. I'll throw this one. He was going so fast, though. He was going so fast. Two hoofing, two face. He's got a wonderful haircut, so maybe he was just like, oh, I shouldn't have. I'll let them have this one. Yeah. I'll throw this one. He was going so fast, though.

He was going so fast. Hoofing too fast. He's got a wonderful haircut, doesn't he? Yeah. Very handsome guy. There's some great haircuts in the All Blacks. How about the shaved head into the mullet as well? That was impressive.

Oh, I do appreciate a mullet being voiced. Yeah. If only I could grow one. That's right. The major hurdle I need to get over. Of course, another game this weekend in Auckland, the second battle for the Bledisloe. And this week is also big because there's an election.

That's happening on Saturday as well. You will see the politicians everywhere, including on TV1's Marae over the weekend, right? Yeah, I had Tohe Nere, former National MP, Willie Jackson, current Labour MP. I think our dear friend Hone Harawira, who we have a deep-seated friendship with, he was on there as well, Georgina Boyer,

and they were going hell for leather, and the host, Miriam Akamo, had to actually, almost tell them off like they were toddlers. You guys are bullying each other, but I want to hear from Georgina. Okay, both of you, he started this. Now, calm down, all of you. this. Now calm down. All of you. For goodness sakes.

You're like children. This is embarrassing. You guys are meant to be representing our people and all you're doing is yelling at each other and not listening to the women on this panel. So calm down. Yeah, look, settle down. No, you settle down.

I am getting fatigued of watching politicians talk over each other. Are you done with it? Yeah, I think because they delayed the election, obviously, so it would have been done by now. So now you're like, oh, we've still got to keep this. Oh, they're still yelling at each other. They're still going because it all wraps up on Saturday. Have you voted yet?

No, not yet. Did you? No, I haven't. No, of course you haven't. You're a millennial. I need to, though. I just need to get around to doing it. I want to do a little bit more research.

Yes. Oh, on the referendums yeah so yeah I kind of feel like I'm not quite in a position to vote more research into exactly how many plants you can continue growing

in your roof no because what you're doing right now not legal okay I'll tell you that for free and that is scrolling

through your feed this morning start your day the wrong way it's Jono and Ben on the hits. It's Fargo and Tina Turner remix of What's Love Got To Do With It. 6.30 on the hits. She's 80 years old.

A fantasy of New Zealand. 80 years old, Tina Turner. And I just saw a photo of her looking amazing. I'm good. Incredible. Jeez, I tell you what. Tina Turner looks as 80 and looks better than me. Yeah, but you can say that about a lot of people.

Ah, yes, the A to Z to New Zealand. We're phoning every town and city in Aotearoa, this fine country. In just 90 minutes from Christchurch, Ben Boyce, sit back and relax in the calming waters of Pools or choose from a range of indulgent body therapies on offer at Hamner Springs. Oh, lovely.

Or if action is maybe more your style. There's an incredible range of walking. Is this all off the top of your head or are you reading this from the internet? I've got this from the Hamner Springs tourism site. Yes, we're heading to Hamner Springs. A lot of boutique shopping, a lot of restaurants and some great accommodation. I think you'll agree this beautiful alpine village has a lot to offer. Well, let's call the pools, the world-famous pools,

which is also an information centre. Good morning, Henry Springs Thermal Pools and iSight. Kelly speaking. Hello, Kelly. It's Jono and Ben calling from the Hits radio station. Hi. Are you Thermal Pools and an information centre? Yes, we are.

Do they keep you busy? Gee whiz, you're a jack of all trades, Kelly. Absolutely. But your name's Kelly, not Jack. Yeah. Thank you for that pity laugh. That was a wonderful pity laugh. Now, we are ringing every town and city in New Zealand one a day.

We like to learn about the place, and today is Hamner Springs' turn. Perfect. Yeah. So being the thermal pool slash information centre, you're the perfect person to ring. Yeah, absolutely. Okay, the top three big bangers to you're the perfect person to ring. Yeah, absolutely. Okay, the top three big bangers to do in Hamner. What are we doing, Kelly? Oh, you've got poles, top one.

I feel like you're contractually obliged to say that part. Yeah. It does look cool. Just look on the website because I went many years ago. Now it's got, like, slides and you go down on little tubes and it looks fun. Yeah, so we have 22 hot poles and four water slides at the pools here. Kelly, that was number one. What else?

Jet boating, definitely. Got to go jet boating or bungee jumping. So which is it, jet boating or bungee jumping? Oh, you can do both. Well, they could be two and three. Okay, two and three. So you've got the pools, jet boating, bungee jumping or you'd like to lump them in as one?

Yeah, you've got to put them as one, I think. Okay, all right. You get them as a package. And number three? Number three has got to be your walking around Henley. Walking? Yeah. You've got great walks around here.

We've got a sculpture walk with a whole lot of wooden sculptures made from the trees which were pulled down right outside the pools. Do you know what, Kelly? Every place we phone, they always say walking. They do. Really? Yeah. You're going to place we phone, they always say walking. They do. Really? Yeah. You're going to have to pull something else apart from walking.

Walking sounds great. Yeah. Is there another one? No. Now, this is what? Running around the sculptures. Running, yeah. Mountain biking.

This is why jet boating and bungee jumping should have been two and three. Yeah, you should have gone back to two and three. Yeah. Or going, you can't miss going out the back, like Molesworth, St. James, beautiful around there. Oh, it does look lovely, doesn't it? Looking on the website, the jet boating looks fun, the mountain biking, a beautiful place.

Yeah, heaps to do. Okay, trick question, how do you spell Hamner? H-A-N-M-E-R. Oh, that's good. No ham in Hamner. How do you spell hammer hardware? H-A-M-M-E-R. Oh, well done, well played.

How do you spell hammerhead? Can't do it, see? Yeah, H-A-M-M-E-R H-E-A-D Can you spell Waipukarau? Not even going to try Can you spell Geneva? J-E-N-E-V-A

No, no, it's a G We got it You were a good speller up until then. Gotcha, we caught you out. Lovely talking to you. Are you busy at the moment? Not too bad. That sounded like a weird...

I meant that in the way of the pools, not like you and me catching up or anything. Yeah. Well, I tell you what you can do, you can go for a walk. Yeah. We can go for a lovely walk. Hey, good on you, Kelly.

You've been a superstar. Thank you so much. That's all right. Great talking to you guys. Yeah, you look after yourself in Hamner. Yes, thank you, Kelly. You've been a superstar. Thank you so much. That's all right. Great talking to you guys. Yeah, you look after yourself in Hamner. Yes, thank you. Bye. Want more Jono and Ben?

You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Ten grand to give away just after 8 o'clock because unfortunately we didn't quite get the hole-in-one in Taupo. We hit 1,000 golf balls at the hole-in-one attraction on the lake. Got close a couple of times. Who would have thought it? Who would have thought we wouldn't have landed that?

Me, me. About three weeks ago when you started this campaign. Here we go. I wondered when this would come out. There were people down there who had been going for 15, 20 years and never landed it. I don't know what wild dream you were living on. But it was fun.

How you got involved? You got me. I really enjoyed it. I don't know what wild dream you were living on. It was just a chance. How you got involved? I really enjoyed it. It was a fun couple of days actually in Taupo and that's all that matters about radio. As long as the people who are hosting it are having fun. It's not about the people listening. Never has been. They taught me that at radio school.

And we did. We had fun. I don't care if the audience enjoyed it or not. We actually had a lot of fun, not only hitting the ball, meeting the people, people that came down to watch us. It was just awesome. And we also had fun hanging out with the team, didn't we? Yeah, we did. Producer Juliet and Producer Humphrey have come in.

We went out for a lovely team dinner. And Boss Todd. Todd Campbell. Todd Campbell. Todd Campbell. He wanted to make a bit of a speech, a pre-dinner speech. You know, sort of like, oh, thank you for coming down. You know, it was meant to be quite presidential.

Yeah. Oh, this was the lovely moment. Todd was going to stand up in a restaurant and make a speech. You know, obviously, you're taking a lot of guts to stand up in front of everyone. You know, it's busy, and he's going to make a speech, a nice speech. And he did the ting, ting, ting on the glass.

You know, the wine glass with the knife. And Juliet in the corner just kept, you kept talking. You kept jabbering away. As I do. He refused to stop talking. I think he'd even started the speech and she's still like,

oh, what's your number? What's your phone number? I'm going to have the pasta. No, she goes, I'm not that hungry I'm not that hungry I'm just hungry That is not what I sounded like

And they were like Oh hey Juliet Maybe just You know Todd Todd's talking You can't mute me That's what you said You can't mute me

Yeah A few little A few drinks in. I actually don't remember saying that. She's unmutable. Unmutable. So Todd didn't even get to make her speak. No, no.

You can't even turn Juliet down on the radio now. She's unmutable. You can't mute her. I keep my microphone on at all times, even during the songs. That's why. That was funny. I'm glad I missed it.

I think I was still at the previous bar at that point. You were wheeling and derailing too. I was just making sure that the bar table had completely dried up. Producer Humphrey, then, at the end of the night, another highlight for you being boys. Yes. Yeah, which you saw on film. Producer Humphrey demonstrating how to share a sheep with a chair.

Yeah, look, bar stools are a great entertainment. You can do so many things with them. You can dance with them. You can... Up until now, I've You can dance with them. You can... Up until now, I've just been sitting on them. Yeah, me too. I'm so boring.

You can do sheep-shearing demonstrations with them and you can also do the rodeo, which is also a personal favourite. So you sort of straddle the chair. Straddle the chair and then just rock back and forth and see if you can get across

the other side of the room. And again, poor old boss Todd. You just hear Todd on the back of the video, Ben, stop it, Ben. Ben, it's the boss chair. Poor Todd, he's had a stress out evening. He's trying to make a speech. He's looking after children.

Anyway, you can't mute me. Wake up full of shame. Wake up with these guys. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Spy, the WhatsApp spy.co.nz Well, well, well, it's time for an update of gossip stories with a celebrity twist, a collection of stories that are usually used as filler content in a real news bulletin,

but we dedicate two full bulletins to it per show. Here's producer Juliette with Spy. Thanks very show. Oh, do we? Do we? Here's producer Julia with Spy. Thanks very much. So, old mate Megan Markle. She's always in the news for something, I feel. Yeah. So, the latest thing on her is she and Harry joined a podcast and as guests talking about World Mental Health Day,

which was over the weekend. And she spoke about, I think this is the first time she's kind of publicly addressed it apart from maybe last year at some point. But she said that she was the most trolled person in 2019 and what it was like for her. You know, I can speak personally to, I'm told that in 2019, I was the most trolled person in the entire world, male or female. Now, eight months of that, I wasn't even visible. I was on maternity leave with a baby. But what was able to just be manufactured

and churned out, it's almost unsurvivable. That's a good for your business card, eh? Meghan Markle, most troll person 2019, male or female. It's a big claim, eh? Oh, jeez. And you feel like... I feel, that's awful. I feel sorry for her, but I don't think she's

helped herself along the way with some decisions that have been made. Explain your thoughts. Yeah, she's living her life. She's ripped poor... You'll never hear from Harry. She's ripped poor Harry away from his family. Harry's a good man. He wants to do it.

Harry had his life planned out for him of a stoic British royal family not showing any emotion or pretending that they don't have any feelings. Okay, and that's how he should have lived out his days. Bring back Party Harriet. Yeah, bring back Nazi Party Harriet. I would have loved to hang out with Party Harriet.

You're a big royalist. What are your thoughts on Markle? I don't mind her, to be honest. I'm kind of like, you know, it's tough. If you were her, it would be so hard. But then I'm kind of just like, people need to get over it. Oh, what I would give to be her. Yeah.

I would love to be her. What she's really done to wind people up. Like, I guess Harry leaving the royals, but that's his decision as well. To your pessimist, you would say she was maybe a bit of an opportunist. That's what people would say. True, true. But this is like your theory when you were like, Art Green and Matilda for the Bachelor.

They're just doing this. They're not together. They're just doing it for the TV show, and they're still together for a TV. They've had a child together. You're like, no. It's a TV baby. I like that theory.

But remember when she was like, oh, I went on the first date. I didn't even know who he was. Yeah. I didn't even know he's Prince Harry. Yeah. She's American, though. You know, they're not royalists. But then again, apparently she really looked up to Princess Diana growing up.

So I was like, oh, she definitely knew. I'm trying to defend her, Ben. We want to make her the most troll person in 2020, male or female, as well. We can't just back out now. Oh, no. Oh, no. And Phil Collins, old mate Phil Collins. Why am I calling everyone old mate today?

I don't know. Well, he is old. Yeah, oh no. And Phil Collins, old mate Phil Collins. Why am I calling everyone old mate today? I don't know. Well, he is old. Yeah, he is. He, his ex-wife still lives in his Miami mansion, which is kind of interesting. He doesn't live there anymore, but she secretly remarried in Vegas. He heard about it and was like,

right, I'm kicking you out. So he's evicting his ex-wife from his own house, which is kind of weird because like, why are you still living there? And she's refusing to leave, I see. She's refusing, saying, like, oh, I'll release, you know, false information about you unless we renegotiate our divorce settlement and all that sort of stuff.

And he'll be like, what? You're going to release false information? Okay, well, you can do that. Yeah, exactly. You just said it's false. No one's going to believe it. Yeah. Silly.

You kind of set yourself up From the get go there lady Yeah Exactly He's worth 300 million dollars Is he really? Yeah He's had some huge songs Over the years

Phil Collins And he's been married three times Five different kids Collins been keeping busy Didn't you go see him In Almost Full of Sleep? No Who'd you see?

I haven't seen Phil You went with your dad somewhere Oh no I went to Bob Dylan Oh Bob Dylan Yeah Bob Dylan Yeah because he played None of the hits that you know. Right.

I think he just gets obviously bored of what he, you know, the hits. He's like, didn't play a single song. Even my dad, who's a fan, he's like, I didn't do two songs over two hours. Didn't talk to the audience at all. Really? Yeah, but yeah, he's an amazing musician, amazing singer. But he just, yeah, there was no crowd banter. There's nothing.

You said it was the longest three hours of your life. It was a long time. Oh, there we go. there's a review of Bob Dylan which has nothing to do with Phil Collins what are you talking about and that's five for more you can head to the

hits.co.nz Lou in calories and Lou in laughs it's Jono and Ben on the hits we want to wrap out our Monday show as we do

why is it going to be a good day are we going to call right now from someone who's listening overseas to the show. Yeah, that's right. We understand we need to say hola because whereabouts in the world are you, Simon?

I mean, I'm in Spain right now. Well, I live in Spain right now. Wow. And you listen to the hits? Absolutely, mate. I mean, we need to get away from that a little bit, from the negativity of all the virus in Spain. So listening to the Hector, especially on a Sunday night when it's Monday morning in your time, the Hector's the best.

Oh, there we go. That's amazing. It's a really smart play if you're in a country riddled with COVID. Just listen to radio shows from countries that don't have any. Oh, yeah. And pretend that it's not around. So are you in lockdown permanently, Simon, or what's the story? Yeah, well, we are on lockdown, unfortunately.

We got locked down on Friday night, and so we're back to not being able to go out, not doing anything. But, you know, we've got to make the best of it. But, yeah, it's not great. You guys have absolutely nailed the virus. Unfortunately, we haven't. And so you were out of lockdown, I'm gathering, for a period there, but then it's obviously just gone back to a point where you can't be out in public.

Yeah, we were out of lockdown in all of our summer, which would have been your winter. And yeah, everything was going really well. and then at the end of the summer um schools opened universities opened and yeah it all went pretty badly actually and the number of cases is uh pretty bad now so and we're also going into our winter so it's uh not looking good how many how many cases a day are coming through oh well in in spain it's now 12 000 cases a day are coming through? Oh, well, in Spain, it's now 12,000 cases a day. A dozen? Oh, my God. Scary time.

Yeah. Have you contracted it yourself? Oh, I don't think so. No, well, stay safe, buddy. Wow. Well, thank you so much for listening to the hits. It's quite a random thing to know that someone overseas in Spain is listening and loving it. So thank you.

Brilliant, mate. Carry on with your radio station. We love the hits here in Spain is listening and loving it. So that's, thank you. Brilliant, mate. Carry on with your radio station, though. We love the hits here in Spain. You know, it's great you phoned through because now we get to say a line I've always dreamed of saying to our international audience. Yeah, yeah. We can actually say that now.

Exactly. Yeah, not make it up. To one person listening in Spain, but it's international. To our international audience. Hey, Simon, you keep safe. Take care, my friend. You go, everyone, mate. How's that?

Simon in Spain, if you want to tell us why it's going to be a good day for you, 0800 the hits is the phone number. We have a $200 Fiji price pack to give away for you. We'll go to the phones.

You tell us why it's going to be a good one. Nisha, you're on the air from Invercargill. How are you? Today's going to be a good day because my bosses are away all week to Christchurch

and we've just got the run of the shop. Oh my gosh. So guys, just so you know, in case you're listening, she definitely hasn't checked out. Still working hard. We're going to give you a $200 Fiji price pack, eh? Really? Yeah, price pack.

There you go. Bring a slice of paradise direct to you. Thanks to our friends at Fiji Independence Day. Okay. Yeah, nothing screams Fiji Independence Day. Okay. Nothing screams Fiji like Invercargill. That is true. Love your work, Nisha. You have a wonderful week.

Great. Thank you. All right. We'll go to Ashley who's on the air from Auckland. Why is it a good day for you, Ash? Hi there. Today's going to be a really good day because uni's back on campus for the first time in months. Was it just today?

Oh, wow, this week. Oh, my gosh. Well, what are you studying? Vet nursing. Yeah, and see, that's why you're going to be a more successful human being than Ben and me. You've made a good life decision. You go on, we'll give you a $200 Fiji prize back.

That's amazing, thank you. Look after yourself. Thank you for listening to the show, and thank you, you guys. It's been a really fun morning. Helen Clark joining us tomorrow on the program, which is cool, isn't it? Yeah, that's fantastic. I haven't heard from Helen Clark in years.

I can't wait to see her. We'll catch you tomorrow from 6. Have a great Monday. See you then, New Zealand. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from 6 on The Hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast.

Friends of Skinny.