Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - October 14 - Guy Sebastian, Big News Small Town, Do You Make The Bed?

Episode Date: October 13, 2020

Today we were joined by Guy Sebastian, we've never interviewed him before and he was the nicest guy who has a new single out now and album on Friday! Jono also went out for dinner last night, got some exceptional service from the staff who were offering him all sorts of lovely dishes, but something happened that he didn't expect. We also revisited a topic we tried to talk about yesterday until our phone system stopped working (lol!) about when you did the right job, but at the wrong place. All that & more on today's podcast!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Welcome to the podcast. Great to be back here on the podcast.

Yeah, it's great. We always sound surprised at the beginning here, like, oh, well, you caught us off guard. We're welcoming people like the mics have just turned on while we're having a secret conversation which is pretty much what happened yeah we're just talking about the show uh just reminding ourselves what was in it so we can forward sell it they call this a menu don't they a bit of a menu of the entertainment coming up what have we got for the entree been uh well we actually a guy sebastian uh you'll know him from uh shows like the voice he's one of the judges on The Voice. First Australian Idol winner.

He's one of those guys I've always seen on TV and gone, he just looks like a really, excuse the pun, great guy. He does look like a great guy. He seems like the type of friend that, you know, he'll give you good life advice. You're like, oh, God, I'm having some trouble. Can't get any annual leave. He's like, what have you thought about talking to your boss?

You know, he'd be a good advice. A genuine sort of guy. Yeah. And he was. He was amazing. He took us on a bit of a tour of the house, which is pretty cool. As well as that, Jono, you racked up a large bill last night, like a rock star. Unintentionally as well.

I thought everything was being gifted to me, foolishly gifted, and I ended up paying for it with my credit card at the end of the night. Literally paying for it. And as well as that, a new game, and you sabotage it for me. And so it's the one. Rock, paper, what is it? Rock, paper, whatever. So it's like scissors, paper, rock, but you just go whatever at the end. and you sabotage it for me. And so it's the one... Rock, paper, what is it? Rock, paper, whatever. So it's like scissors, paper, rock, but you just go whatever at the end.

So we'll give it one example. Rock, paper, asbestos. Yeah, so you have to work out who would win in a fight an hour between an army tank and asbestos. Well, has the person driving the army tank been affected by asbestos? Could asbestos erode the army tank? You get into debates like that. Yeah, lung disease.

You sabotaged it. So anyway, enjoy that and more on the podcast. The Songy Corn Flakes of Radio. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. I fell victim to a scam last night. It was a face-to-face scam. Tell me about this. I enjoyed this story quite a lot.

I'm looking forward to you telling it. Yesterday morning I mentioned that I was going out to dinner last night, family dinner. You know, rekindle, rekindle, re-spark. Re-spark with the kids there too, which is weird. It's weird having a romantic dinner with the kids there. They're like, Mum, Dad, stop kissing. Are you going to walk out with her?

So we went to this restaurant and, you know, we've been to it many times, a couple of times before. And I mentioned it yesterday on the show that we were going there. We had a wonderful conversation. It's got a lazy Susan on the table. And we said, oh, you know, imagine the poor old Susan who the lazy Susan was named after. It was Thomas Jefferson after his daughter. She must have been lazy AF.

She was always complaining about how she was last to get served. And so he came up with the invention of the lazy Susan for her. It was more complaining Susan. Moaning Susan. But anyway, it's fine. The name's out there. If there was something on the table that just went like,

oh, that's not hot enough. That would be more appropriate. But anyway, we had a wonderful conversation yesterday. So I went into the restaurant. I was like, oh, hello. I heard you talking on the radio. I was like, oh, yeah, no, thanks for listening, Rowdy. I sat down and then he's like,

he comes up and he's like, you must try the garlic bread. Let me get the garlic bread for you. And I'm like, okay, yeah, great. Great, we'll take the garlic bread. And it felt to me like his intonation. It was gifty. It was gifty.

Anyway, I'll stop. I must see. I'll get like, you know, I'll go get it for you now. You've got to try it. You need to try this. You're on the menu. You'll just love this garlic bread. Yeah, you know what? No, anyway, I'll get like, you know, I'll go get it for you now. You need to try it. You need to try this. You're on the menu. You'll just love this garlic bread. You know what?

No, anyway. When anyone says that, you're like, oh, this must be, you know, a gift. Why would it be a gift though? This is a job. It's a restaurant. Like their job is for people to order food that they get money for. Yeah, but I hadn't ordered the food. What are you thinking?

I'm Jono Pryor from the radio. Yeah, I'm so low-listed, DSCD-grade celebrity here. I deserve a free garlic bread, mate. I'll take a photo for you. Oh, this is generous of you. Thank you very much. Yeah, yeah, thank you.

Oh, yeah, great. Celebrity garlic bread here, ladies and gentlemen. Hold it up over my head. But so that went on. And then it got to the mains. He's like, oh, I tell you what, the pasta, the caponara pasta,

you're just going to love that. Let me get that for you. And I'm like, this is a free meal. So you felt like you hadn't ordered it. He's just like... Well, he's not doing it to anyone else on the table. It's just to me. He's pushing, he's peddling his food. So did you order something for you as well as this free thing? Yeah. Oh, right. So this is

gift pasta. You can feel it coming on. Gift Cabanara. Nothing quite like the taste of free Cabanara in your mouth. Or what you think is free. You're like, oh, you're right. This is great. He's like, yeah, I told you. We rattled through all of them.

Free tiramisu. It was just amazing. Espresso martinis. He's best in the Southern Hemisphere. Southern Hemisphere. It was great. It was great. It was even better because I thought it was free.

Then I get up to the counter counter he's charged me for the stuff of course he has he's charged he's a monster monster that's his business that's the business model people come in

they order stuff he's helped encourage you to get food off the menu that you're paying for this is an hour to Spain I was saying you're driving home and when you raised it this morning,

I was like, you know, probably out of all the industries at the moment, the one who's not going to hand out free stuff is the restaurant and bar industry. It makes a lot of sense. I have a question. Oh, here we go. So you know how you said that he heard you on the radio yesterday? What if he hears you bagging him today?

Yeah, he'd just call him a monster. Yeah, he'll only listen one day. Yeah, he only listens one day. He only listens on Tuesdays. Well, I'll tell you what, charge him for this. Charge him for this. Yeah, now, that's right. I'll charge him for advertising.

That's what you do for a job. You've given him, no, you haven't given him a look like. I mean, it would be a shocking business model just to hand out, so how's the restaurant, how's your free restaurant going? Oh, we only lasted a week.

Couldn't pay rent. So in hindsight, it all makes sense. But hey, just when you're wording it, it's the wording. I kind of see where you're coming from. Remember to double pump the virgals. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, my daughter

wants to sleep over for her birthday party. That's a big thing in their life, and they start planning it months out from birthday parties. Oscar, my son, had a sleep over. We came back from Taupo on Saturday and he had a sleepover on Friday. He didn't sleep once. He returned like, you know,

probably like you from Rhythm and Vine, studio. Walking dead. He was like, bags under his eyes, just like, what's going on? Yeah, they love staying up super late and getting up super early. Yeah, and he comes home and he's like, oh, now you like me, eh?

Now you want to have a cuddle. I see. But my daughter Sienna was looking up fun games you could play in the sleepover. And I saw this one online. It was called, we were looking at this, called Rock, Paper, Whatever. So it's kind of like rock, paper, scissors. You play it in audio form.

So you would say, Juliet, for example, this could be a shambles, we'll give it a go. You say rock, paper, and then Jono and I, we come up with a whatever, and then we have to work out which of our whatevers would win in a fight. Would win, okay. In a fight.

That makes sense, all right. Ready? For example, let's go example. So you would say rock, paper, then Jono could say T-Rex, and I would say fighter jet, and then we'd go, oh, what would win in a fight between a fighter jet and a T-Rex?

Maybe the fighter jet would, you know, shoot and a T-Rex? Maybe the fighter jet would shoot down the T-Rex, for example, and I would take that one out. Well done to you. Yeah, that's how it works. But I feel like you're going to sabotage this game. I want to sabotage the game. Now that I've brought this up, now I'm live on the radio. This is a lovely children's game you're trying to create for your daughter's

sleepover. I feel like you're going to sabotage this game. I would not sabotage it. Alright. Actually, I feel like I want to not do this game now. Oh, no, let's do it. Okay. Okay. Rock, paper. Bill Cosby.

Okay. Now, who's going to beat Bill Cosby, Ben? I was going to say a dragon from Game of Thrones. Okay. Now, let's tour this out. Cosby did some despicable things. No, you can't. Yeah. You've sabotaged. Okay. No, I'm moving on. Oh, boy. Cosby did some despicable things. No, you can't. Yeah.

You sabotaged. Okay, no, move on. No, because that was the dragon. The dragon would beat Cosby in that situation. Oh, okay. Do I do another one? Yeah, okay. Rock, paper, R Kelly.

Okay, right, moving on. Serving bowls of lolls for breakfast. Actual lolls may not be served. It's Jono and Ben on their heads. He's one of Australia's most popular singers. He sold almost four million albums, six number one singles in Australia. He was their first Australian Idol winner.

He's also the judge and coach on The Voice. You would have seen him on New Zealand TV all the time. His ninth album is out this week. It's called Truth. It's Guy Sebastian. He's on Zoom right now. He is on Zoom right now, and it looks like from the screen, sitting in front of a bar.

Oh, yeah, just some breakfast scotch. This is pretty much the only place that I get coverage. The house is made of, I don't know if you can see that concrete up there, but it's like a really thick concrete and it's just shocking for coverage. So I've got to come up the top. Is that your house? Yeah, I I've got to come up the top. Is that your house? Yeah, I've got a little bar at the top. Oh, nice.

Oh, you've got a bar in your house. Jeez. It's very necessary. Very necessary. Guys, Sebastian, this has been a wonderful tour of your house. It has been. It's a prompt you tour. I know.

I've always been a big fan of your guy and it just seemed like one of the nicest, most genuine people around in the industry. And it's awesome to see that sort of come across today. Oh, thank you. It's a long time coming, this house. I grew up in Adelaide and we weren't fancy people and did not grow up like this. So every single day we just cannot believe we're in a nice new house.

Well, I'm sure when you grow up not having as much and when you reach the lofty heights of your success, I'm sure you appreciate it every day and appreciate every part of it. Yeah, absolutely. And then it's trying to like make my kids appreciate stuff. Not every house has a bar in it, kids. No, seriously. That's my biggest thing.

I just want them to, you know, appreciate things. And I think you don't get that unless you grow up not having everything. And so, yeah, anyway, hopefully. So what you need to do. I raise little crabs. Yeah, what you need to do is you need to build a shack out the back of the house. Leave the kids in there.

Seriously. With no electricity or running water. Well, guys, Sebastian, I guess we should get to the purpose of the interview. It's not for us to do a piss take of MTV Cribs or anything like that. It was, of course, to talk about

your brand new album. It's your ninth album, which is pretty cool. It's called Truth. And I understand it was quite a journey for you to get in the studio and to bring this out. So it must feel good to have it out there in the world now. Yeah, look, it took a while. I'm glad I took my time.

It's definitely a snapshot of highs and lows. You know, it's been three or four years in the making. And in that time, there's been some interesting three or four years in the making and in that time there's been some interesting things to navigate to say the least you know like I've you know sort of had to deal with some loss and grief and things like that and and you know family members friends who have gone through you know mental health and lost that battle I've gone through an awful management split which was really tough. After 12 years of management, it sort of ended, you know,

somebody that I really, really trusted ended up with him being arrested over here and it's an awful thing to watch. It wasn't something I enjoyed. Hard to swallow. But it was really hard to start the album process because I was in this position where I was kind of made to feel like without them I would fail and I'd just completely fall over so I started writing this album and I felt like almost like I'd forget how to write or how to do what I did I felt a bit crippled or something, like creatively. Yeah, I thought that was it, legit.

Like I thought, oh, you know, that's my career done or whatever. And then I ended up sort of having the best couple of years that I've had in music and in my career. Like strangely, just things were really great. So I had these highs, massive highs, and then real weird lows to deal with as well. So I guess the album's like, it shows that. There's a lot of emotion and then lots of joyous songs.

The new song's pretty joyous. That's awesome. We've got Guy Sebastian with us. Guy, I know you're a busy guy. So before you go... By the way, that's a great name for an album. Busy Guy. Busy Guy.

It's maybe your next album. Busy Guy. Yes. I found an article, Things You a great name for an album. Busy Guy. Busy Guy. Busy Guy. Maybe your next album. Busy Guy. Yes. I found an article, things you didn't know about Guy Sebastian. There's a couple here. I want to see if Guy Sebastian knows these things about himself. All right?

All right. Did you know that Guy Sebastian loves his mum's curry and so does Mel B from the Spice Girls? Did you know that? I did know that. Okay, good. Good to know. Mel sampled a little bit of my mum's curry.

That's pretty cool. Okay. She put the spice into the Spice Girls. Yeah. Oh, good. Good to know. Mel sampled a little bit of my mum's carriers. That's pretty cool. Okay, we put the spice into the spice, girls. Oh, good. Just like that. Our pun game is on fire, Guy Sebastian. Don't tell Guy Sebastian we went for two and a half years on that one. Guy Sebastian has got Oprah Winfrey seal of approval. That's the final one I want to throw at you. Did you know that? I did know that, yes. That was a pretty special moment. Look, I've got to meet some incredible people.

I've got to say Oprah was amazing. I sung for her twice. She was in Australia and she did this event and I sung, did like an hour set and she was meant to stay for two songs and do the obligatory, you know, thanks to me. She stayed for the whole set. And then on the way home, I get this call and Oprah personally said,

oh, I want Guy to sing at our rap party. We're going to do a rap party at the end of our Aussie trip with just the Harpo staff. And we'd love for him to do that. So me and my band, we played and like Oprah's on stage with us, arms around us for the whole set. It was such a surreal moment. She's like Jesus, isn't she?

Yeah, she's amazing. She seriously is. Guy Sebastian, great catching up with you, buddy. And so good to have new music from you in the world. The new album, Truth, out now, Guy Sebastian. Thanks for the tour of the house and thanks for taking your time. Pleasure. And I'll be over there playing live really soon so keep abreast

of information. When you come over here you can stay at my house but FYI I don't have a bar by the way but there is something. Sorry mate

I'm not slumming it anyway. Good on you mate. Have a good one. Eggs for breakfast. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Yesterday, not one of our finest moments, was it? High drama. High drama after 8.30.

We'll bring you up to speed. We went to the phones just for your stock standard commercial radio phone-a-topic. We throw out a question and hope, pray to God, that some calls come through so we can fill three minutes of airtime. We're looking for people that did the right job in the wrong place. And we thought, this is going to go great.

The phone lines, they were blowing up. People were calling in. Let's go to Catherine. You're on the air from Auckland. How are you, Cath? Good to have you on. What was the right job, wrong place, Catherine? I keep talking, just hoping she's going to pick it up.

I'm not hearing, Catherine, but I'd like to hear it. We could smell something was wrong, but we continued on like the truth. I don't know why. Anyway, you continued on. We battled on through it. We can move on to Theo. How's kitty kitty this morning, Theo? It's all right?

Good. I'll just keep talking until Theo picks it up. Something smells. Oh, good stuff. All right. We'll move on to Sarah. Good, I'll just keep talking until Theo picks it up. Something smelled... Oh, good stuff, all right. We'll move on to Sarah. Something smelled fishy. We knew something was awry, but again, being the true professionals we are,

we battled on through. I'm going to go to Nelson. How are you, Anita? Good stuff. So there we go. It turns out the phones had a meltdown during that particular topic. And afterwards, producer Humphrey, Ben Humphrey,

we publicly shamed him, didn't we, in the office. Made him do gangnam style in front of everybody. Nothing more shaming than a fad from yesteryear. We made Millennial Max do the Macarena. He planked and then did the Macarena. And boy, we laughed. And they were shamed. So today the phones are working and we feel

you know there's some legs in this topic. Yeah well it felt like there was lots of people ringing up for it we just couldn't hear what they had to say so when have you done the right job but in the wrong place? This came off the back of your dad watching someone dump a whole pile of bricks. 6,000 bricks

is what they dumped but in the wrong place, the neighbour's place. They should have been at the house next to them, and then they had to put the 6,000 bricks back in the truck and move it next door. Your friend, he did community service, was told to paint a fence, painted the wrong fence. Yeah, right job, wrong place.

This is what we want. Now, let's try this round two, back for the sequel. Let's head to Kitty Kitty's on New Zealand's breakfast. It's Theo, ladies and gentlemen. How's it? Oh, good to have you on, Theo. I'll stop for a second there. The phones weren't working again.

How are you, my friend? Yeah, yeah, good, good. Right job, wrong place. What was it? Oh, I seen a lady. I was trimming palms in Kirikiri, and she's like, oh, you can come to my place

and trim my palms if you want. And I'm like, oh, yeah, sweet ass. Yeah, wonderful, wonderful re yeah, sweet ass. Yeah. Wonderful. Wonderful reenactment of the conversation. I love it. Went round and she was like, it was an A and B driveway and I trimmed up A's instead of B's.

Oh, no. The owner of A comes down and he's like, what are you doing, you bloody stingray? I'm like, yeah, your wife asked me to trim your palms and he's like, I'm not married. I was like, oh. I love this.

I can picture it all in my head. That was a beautiful rendition of what went on, my friend. You're on the line. We're going to figure out a Fiji 5-0 prize pack. Have a great day. Yeah. Nothing's phasing Theo, is it? He's pretty chill. Right job, wrong place. Sarah in Taranaki, welcome to the

show. What was it? I work for a property management firm and I was in charge of the installation project and we had an installation firm show up and insulate an entire unit for a tenant that wasn't the right one. Insulated an entire house?

Yeah. Wrong house. We got a text. Let them in and let them do it and then the other tenant runs. This is great. Yeah. Yeah, the landlord was pretty stoked. Yeah, I mean, if someone's offering to insulate your house and you haven't booked for it,

you're going to take it, aren't you? You're going to take it. Yeah. We got a text yesterday, someone who put a roof on the wrong house. Oh, my God. That'd be great. An entire roof. These are things that you're like, surely you would talk to someone before you're We got a text yesterday, someone who put a roof on the wrong house. Oh, my God. An entire roof. These are things that you're like,

surely you would talk to someone before you started the job, just to double check. Good on you, Sarah. You have a lovely day. Thank you. We'll head to Pocono. Nicole, how are you? Hi, good.

Thanks, and you? Have we spoken before, Nicole? Yes. Oh, lovely. Listen, thank you for phoning through. Without you, we would have nothing. So thank you. Hey, what happened?

Right job, wrong place. My family builds swimming pools in South Africa, and my uncle confirmed a pool with a client, but the client was living overseas at the time, so he just confirmed their address, got the deposit, went out and dug the whole shape of the pool. Oh, no. The next day, got to the house, and there was a man standing in the driveway, fuming.

Wrong house. He dug an entire pool. He dug the entire pool at the wrong house. Oh, my God. Had to calm the guy down, get some roll-up grime, a few boxes of beer. Although, who doesn't want a pool? Yeah, we almost installed a pool. Just go, mate, put a pool in.

Yeah. I tried to dig a pool in Ben's backyard. I ended up putting a almost installed a pool. Just go, mate, put a pool in. Yeah. I tried to dig a pool in Ben's backyard. I ended up putting a digger through your... You did, actually, yeah. Yeah, you weren't there. That was wrong job, wrong place on both occasions there. I appreciate your call, Nicole. We're going to put you out a Fiji Five-0 price pack, all right? Thank you.

All right, good on you. You keep turning up for these therapeutic massages you keep going to for your hamstrings, but every time it's that place and the police keep coming in. Is that right or wrong place? Here we go. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Time for the big news.

Small town. Town, town, town, town. Now this is very cool. ASB Bank is the new naming rights sponsor of Eden Park in Auckland. But in a lovely gesture, they've given the naming rights for this weekend's Bledsoe Cup game at Eden Park to a small Kiwi business. So it's been revealed that Kaikoura fish and chip business, Cooper's Catch, has got the naming rights for the New Zealand-Australian game this weekend.

So it's going to be called Cooper's Catch Park after the fish and chip shop, the family-owned fish and chip shop in Kaikoura. That's amazing. Imagine the international audience. They'll be like, oh, geez, fish and chips are really flying out the door like a sponsor in an international sporting stadium. Well, they must make a lot of money off fish and chips.

I tell you, I've got to get into fish and chips. We'll head to Kaikoura now and talk to Jason. Jason, how are the whales, dolphins, crayfish and other local references? Very good, mate. Actually, I'm here in the whales, dolphins, crayfish and other local references? Very good, mate. Actually, I'm here in Auckland today. Oh, OK. How are the lattes and the traffic?

You know, usually our traffic jam is about seven minutes to work. Is that how long it takes you? Now, this is very exciting. This weekend, you've basically got the naming rights for Eden Park. Yes, it's pretty insane. Yeah, we've only known about this a few days. It's been quite a rocky sort of thing to get used to, really. So you're an ASB customer on Gathering.

Absolutely. And you got the chance to, as part of their idea to stimulate the economy. That's a really cool idea, actually. Fantastic idea. So your little battler fish and chip shop from Kaikoura is called Cooper's Catch. Yeah. It's got the naming rights for Eden Park. So it's Cooper's Catch Park, the All Blacks Wallabies playing this weekend.

Absolutely. It has a ring to it, doesn't it? It does. Very nice. Looking at your website. Wow. Gee whiz. Have you seen this, Ben?

No. I am a Finnish fish and chip connoisseur. Oh, yeah. Jono, every Friday he gets very excited. He's like, fish and chip Friday. Fish and chip Friday. I have a day of the week dedicated to fish and chip consumption, and yours just looks, I'm going to say,

probably looks the freshest in New Zealand. Well, it is. Thank you. Let's go. Someone saying thank you in the background. That's my dear wife, Natasha. Hi, guys. Hi, Natasha.

How are you? And that's the finest compliment I could pay them. And so, blue codding. Oh, blue cod, yes. I've seen blue cod's the best fish in New Zealand. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, and everything we do there, it's all cooked to order, so nothing pre-cooked.

Look at this burger, Ben. Look at that egg burger with the bacon in it. Oh, it does look good. Look at it. it does look good. Look at it. It does look good. Oh, my God. You know, we have a lot of fun cooking food.

I mean, a lot of fun cooking food. And then we start taking pictures. Yeah. It looks amazing. My arteries are getting turned on just looking at the pictures. What's the best thing you do on the menu?

To be fair, it's got to be the blue cod. Have you ever served up dolphin? No. Oh, the horror. I'm just joking. Sorry about that, guys. It was all going so well until that question.

The ocean's a free-for-all. No, it's not. Tash has just gone for a sit-down. She can't handle this anymore. If you can put a dolphin in a deep fryer I'll eat it no no

I've offended a lot of people you've offended me as well alright I'm wrapping this up but so congratulations to you guys it's so good for you and do you get to go along to the rugby this weekend? yeah we do we do

we're on Parkside it's just it's just unbelievable what's happening we don't really know kind of what's ahead really I think they're trying to keep us grounded and just let us know what's happening on the don't really know what to heed, really. I think they're trying to keep us grounded and just let us know what's happening on the day.

But, yeah, no, it's going to be insane. Hey, listen, congratulations. You sound well-deserving of this. Eden Park named after your fish and chip shop, Cooper's Catch in Kaikoura, this weekend. International media. Yes. You're going to get priceless marketing.

Absolutely, yeah. It's insane, isn't it? Yeah, they're going to be coming. We've got to put a big, big, big shout out to ASB. Obviously, it's Andean Park, but ASB have done a fantastic job. It's great thinking.

We feel a real responsibility even for business owners. We need to tell New Zealanders to get out and just support their local businesses because it's hard out there for everyone. Oh, good on you, Jason. And if I can give a shout-out to ASB as well. Listen, I keep dropping into overdraft. And if they could stop charging me for the overdraft fee,

Well, don't drop into overdraft. That's just my little shout-out. That's not a shout-out. Surely. More of a plea than anything. Yeah. Congratulations. You guys sound like you really deserve this. It's an awesome thing, and enjoy the game on Sunday.

Thank you very much. Thanks, guys. Thank you. Just like a chocolate milkshake, only white and disappointing. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Hey, Ben Boyce, you're having some issues, handbag-related issues. Oh, yeah, because my wife a couple of years ago got a handbag.

She saved up. She got a handbag and it's a flash handbag. But it's so fancy, she doesn't let it touch the ground. And I really appreciate the fact that she looks after it. It's cool.

I admire that. But at the same time, it's like, oh God, I think she's just going a little overboard with this handbag. The handbag's constantly playing can't touch the ground.

Yeah, I know. The floor is lava. I get in trouble too because I forget and I'll just put it on the carpet. It's not like I'm dragging it through farmyard mud, but I'll be like, can't touch the ground. Carpet's well cushioned though. I mean, you've got the underlay and the... That's what I think.

Yeah, no, you'd think it'd be a safe place. I love that handbag. I've seen that handbag. I like that handbag more than you. Yeah, well, you go out, like if you go out to the movies and there's especially the handbags. I like that handbag more than you. Yeah, well, you go out, like, if you go out to the movies and there's a space, like, the handbags, you know, sit in one seat. Oh, the handbag gets a seat. You go to a restaurant, she's either got,

she carries around a little hook thing in her bag so she can hook it on from the table or she'll put it on a seat if it's not there. It's like, yeah, sometimes when she's out, though, I just drag that thing across the ground. Just for, like, just when she's not looking. And dance around that handbag. But not only on the carpet,

never take it outside. I mean, I don't mind holding handbags for Jen, you know, when she's out doing stuff. Yeah, that's fine. I just never know how to hold them. You know, I sort of end up cradling them like a baby. Yeah, it's one of those things, you're right,

because you put it over your shoulder, do what you do with it, and it's fine. It's always when shopping, I find that that's where you kind of do it, where they're trying on clothes and then you have the double awkward thing because you're hanging outside of changing rooms.

My partner's in there, my partner's in here. Well, that's what he keeps telling the shop assistants anyway. Thanks for a good story. My theory, I've talked to you about this before, is like a Glassons or whatever and I think this is a great idea. Should set up a little area with some lazy boys, maybe some sport on the TV, a few beers, you know, a PlayStation.

You'd be like, let's go to Glassons. Yeah, take as long as you want. So you're asking Glassons to dedicate half of their floor space to a bar. Set up a bar. Just so you can go and sit in, yeah. And then even Friday night, we go, let's go to Glassons. Boys, you want to go watch the footy at Glassons? Watch some girls try on some chinos today? No, we're just watch the footy at Glassons watch some girls

try on some chinos are they we're not we're just watching the footy that's not part of it mate

that's not part of my business why don't you put a wall up for that we're just there to well then why don't

you just start a bar why doesn't it be in Glassons then you're there within the store why don't you just go okay man you go try some stuff

I'll be next door to the bar instead of you're making poor old glasses, get a liquor license. Get the council approval. But sometimes you want to be there to go, oh, that's a nice outfit.

You should buy that. You want to be supportive, but you also want to be comfortable. Are you paying for drinks at this glasses bar that you've created? In my head, no. But I'm sure as a business model they'd probably need to sell drinks. You're right. So anyway, that's my business model.

If I'm on Dragon's Den, I'm pitching that to you. Yeah, but I'd go, oh, well, Glasses is going fine, just selling clothes just the way we are. Why would we hinder ourselves with diversifying into a bar? The drunken. Drunk guys. Yeah, that's right. Anyway, well, that was a conversation.

Where did we start there? Oh, the handbag. Ended up with you pitching glasses and bar. Wild ride. Wild ride and the show continues. Hey, you've got toothpaste on the side of your mouth. It's Jono and Ben on my heads. Spy, the WhatsApp by doco.nz.

All right, who's ready to listen to Juliet Pratt along about the Kardashians for a couple of minutes? It's another episode of Spy. Come on in, Juju. So Josh685, who you will probably well and truly know by now from the song. He's officially made it to the number one in the US Billboard charts.

So cool, eh? So epic. I think he made it number one in New Zealand and a few other countries, but he's officially the biggest song and artist in the US right now. Isn't it amazing you can just do that from the comfort of your own home? Well, I couldn't because I don't have the skills. No, but you can. You're right. He made a beat in his garage and then Jason Derulo sung over it

and then the rest is history. Yeah, I mean, there's nothing from my house that would ever make number one anywhere in the world. What about your recorder? Oh, thank you. Why did you bring that up? He accused me the other day. No, no,

here's an apology. On here, he accused me of stealing your recorder. You carry around a recorder for some reason. The world's most obnoxious man carries around

the world's most obnoxious instrument. You carry it around in your bag for moments like this. And then the other day we went to get it and you were like, you've stolen it. You've stolen it. It was missing in your bag for moments like this. And then the other day we went to get it and you were like,

you've stolen it. You've stolen it. It was missing in my bag but then I saw it there this morning and I was like, oh well I need to apologise because I accused you.

I did take it. Or maybe I did and put it back in today. Maybe, no. Record a theft. We'll play this, I'll play along where it would seem appropriate

just to play along with Savage Love, wouldn't it? Oh, you can do a remix. So Josh, 685, feat Jason Derulo, feat Jono Pryor. But I still want that

inside the store. Inside the store. You can lose me. Because I still want that. Okay. Wonderful. Like the little Pied Piper getting all the rats

out of the town. Yes. Or scaring the rats away rats out of the town. Yes. Or scaring the rats away. One of the two. And when Elton John was playing a concert in Australia back in January, so he was playing in the middle of a horrendous storm. Would you like to play along with Elton John? It's always...

Oh, God. Shall I turn his microphone off? Tiny dancer. There we go. Go name another song. Oh, God. Candle in another song. Oh, God. Candle in the Wind. Oh, God.

Name another Elton John song. Crocodile Rock. Just belting out the bigger hits. I'm almost about to turn your microphone off. Hit after hit on the hits. They don't call it the hits for another. That's right, Peter. Exactly.

But I'm in the middle of the storm. You imagine picnic baskets flying around the place, chairs flying around the place. And Elton John was faced with the challenge of trying to play the piano while focusing on not letting his wig fall off. And he said that was the first time in his career he was actively like,

oh my God, my wig's about to fall off. Oh, right. Because in the middle of a storm, I actually didn't realise that he wore a wig. I didn't realise he had a wig on either. Yeah, I was watching something on the TV with him on the weekend and it was showing some old footage and yeah, when you see the old stuff, you're like, oh, okay.

I just thought he had a very consistent haircut. Yeah. You know, it just keeps going. You know, we went to the Gold Coast, went to a family friend's children's birthday party, so talking sort of three or four year olds, and they had a Australian magician there and it was in the backyard and he was doing his magic

and he's like, who wants to see some tricks kids? And then he bent down but the branch from the tree caught onto his wig and he bent down and like comedy, the wig got caught on the tree, on the branch. Was that a trick or was that? This is the greatest magic trick ever. He doesn't have hair. Why'd he do that? And it was sort of hanging there like a dead possum off the end.

But he didn't notice. He just kept going with the show. I will make my hair disappear. Everyone was like, do we say something? Or do you just roll with it? Yeah. Anyway, I mean, if you want to wear a wig, good on you. You'll be like, if he doesn't need that, I'll have that.

I'll take that. Are you done with that one, mate? Yeah. You could slap that on there. On this bald golf ball over here. Yeah, imagine if you just turned up with a toupee on. I'd be like, oh, he's a new Jono. Toupee fiasco.

It's coming. Would you say anything? If I turned up tomorrow with a wig, you would, because you'd be in wood. You'd mock me out of work. Yeah. No, I'd be supportive. No, you would not be supportive. If that's me out of words yeah no I'd be supportive no you would not be supportive that's what you wanted to do

I'd be like oh okay you know he made me wear a wig on the project that's right we got you a toupee he's like I've got you

a gig on the project but I'm going to make you wear a toupee yeah it was quite a realistic one you look good you look like when Hummus Simpson gets

like a full luscious head of hair when I first found out I was working with you both I just googled you both google image and I was like oh Jono's got just Googled you both, Google image, and I was like,

oh, Jono's got hair in this photo. A lot of it too. It's proceeding. It's going down over my eyeballs. I was like, I wonder if he wears this quite often or not. This is a special occasion. This is a special occasion.

You play your cards right, Juju? Friday could be a wig day. Could be a wig day. And that is Spy. For more, you can head to the hits.co.nz. New Zealand's breakfast. Just don't eat them.

They're chewy. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Well, you're a to thehits.co.nz. New Zealand's breakfast. Just don't eat them. They're chewy. It's Jono and Ben on the Hits. Well, they're a bit late there, Ben boy. It is the Hits. Jono and Ben, 8.17. There's a flustered panic. You can hear an announcer grabbing his headphones. I'm here.

I'm ready to go, guys. Lost in someone's Instagram account, were you? Oh, no. Just reading about this. It's a surprise pack we've got to give away. Thanks to Fiji Independence Day. 50 years since Independence Day. So we've just reading about this, a fantastic prize pack we've got to give away, thanks to Fiji Independence Day, 50 years since Independence Day, so

we've got a Fiji 5-0 prize pack for every caller, and I thought it was important we should probably mention that now, because you want to get some callers on 0800, the

Hits. Yeah, we do, we do. I mean, we just had Guy Sebastian on from Australia, we gave him a Fiji 5-0 prize pack, he was ecstatic, wasn't he?

Yeah, he was. Lovely guy, Guy Sebastian, he seems like someone you'd want to be friends with, and he'd be a safe pair of hands. He'd pick you up from the domestic airport when you arrived. I see these people like that as celebrities. I'm like, I reckon

we'd be mates, we'd have a beer, but they wouldn't want to be mates with me. No, why would Guy Sebastian want to be friends with us? I say that all the time. I'm like, Ryan Reynolds, he'd want to be, you know, we'd have a great time but he doesn't want to be my mate. No, he's got better friends. Way better friends. But anyway, Guy Sebastian got one of the packs, so you can have one of the packs too. 0800 the hits.

Call up, but you don't even know what you're calling up for at the moment. But it's a pretty simple question, because Julia, you just in passing this morning in the early hours said something that raised our eyebrows, didn't it, Ben Boyce? Like Judith Collins in a debate. Yeah.

I don't really remember the last time I made my bed. I'm just not a bed maker, especially when we get up at this hour. I don't really remember the last time I made my bed. I'm just not a bed maker, especially when we get up at this hour. I'm like, time is precious when you wake up at four o'clock in the morning. It's a three to six minute exercise making a bed, isn't it? Yeah, absolutely. And I don't begrudge you for doing it. I mean, no one enjoys making a bed.

No. It's the one of life. And changing a duvet cover. Oh my, what monster invented that? Folding a fitted shirt. Just crazy. So I don't begrudge you for doing it and to be honest, I haven't done it for a long time as well because Jen, my wife, she leaves in the mornings getting kids ready,

dropping them off at school. She doesn't have time to do the bed. I get home, I see the bed's still unmade but I'm like, well you know, it's only a few more hours till I mess it up again. There's no point in making it. Exactly, 100%. I kind of run by that. Especially now, as you say,

we get up early. My wife, Amanda, is in bed, so I'm like, I'm not going to make it around. Just make your half? Turn on the lights at four in the morning. Although she puts

a Mount Everest of display pillows on top of the bed too, which you have to wrestle your way through for 20 minutes before you can actually reach the bed.

That adds some time because she likes making a bed. She will make it after she gets up. Hotel quality bed. Yeah, and put all the display pillows back on, which annoys me because you've just got to take them all off again. Yeah, I mean, don't get me wrong.

I enjoy a maid bed. When you hop into a maid bed, you appreciate it. Yeah, but you just don't like making them. So 0800, that's a snap poll. We're going to take five quick calls. Do you make your bed or should we have a referendum to ban bed making? Okay, well, can we get that in for Saturday, maybe? We can sneak that through.

We'll head to Palmy. Charlotte, you're on the air. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Bed, yes or no? Making it, yes or no? No, no making the bed. No making the bed. Okay, any reason why?

Oh, I just can't. You know, you're getting in the bed at the end of the day. It's fine. No point. Did you just say it just can't be? Anyway, we'll move on from that. No, we're not going to gloss over it. We'll highlight it.

Prize pack coming your way for a little bit of swearing and a little bit of contribution to our show. Thanks, Charlotte. Appreciate it. We'll get to more as well.

Kennedy, you're on the air. Are you making your bed or are you denying it? I make it every day regardless of anything. I walk past it in the morning and I have to make it.

Fastidious. Yeah. And I bet you're a motel, hotel quality bed maker, are you, Kennedy? I try to be. Do you do a turn down at night? Put a chocolate on a pillow? No, not that good.

Oh, Fiji prize pack coming your way. $200 thanks to Fiji Independence Day. My daughter, Indy, eight years old. Every day makes a bed just without first aid. We've said this before. She's a 48-year-old and an eight-year-old's body. She takes herself, puts off to bed. Puts off to bed all the time, yeah. Does her tax returns.

Yeah. What a child. What a child. Goes to the gym every morning. Yeah, exercise. Done a seven-minute workout from this app I found. You're like, okay. Very good kid.

Then we'll go one more, even though I said we'll take five, we're running out of time, you know. Five was ambitious, too. Five was ambitious, yeah. No, it was too many. Hey. We're not Newstalk ZB. We can't say we're going to take five callers. Yeah, no, it's a lot of callers.

Too many callers for us. I mean, you know, we've gone to the four-minute mark now, Ben, but now we're talking about how long we've been talking. But we'll go to, no, no, no, no, we'll go to Alison. How are you? How are you, Alison? Hi, how are you? Oh, you're on the air.

You're making your bed? Oh, I do. I'm a nurse, so I have to. Oh, you've been making beds all day. Yeah. Yeah, so I do. And I have to say my children don't, so. Yeah, one of your favourite hobbies and chores.

Just imagine how many minutes or hours you've spent making beds in your life, Alison. Oh, it'll be hours. Yeah. If you can't be do it for my job. Well, you're right. People that work at hotels, it's the last thing they want to do when they get home. Is make a bed, yeah. Because I was, we were in New Plymouth once and they did a thing when we

were at dinner and the person at the motel came and turned down the bed, put a chocolate on the pillow. I didn't notice the chocolate. I slept all over it. And I had quite the... You're like, what have I done? What unspeakable things took place overnight. I had a wee accident, guys.

I'm so sorry about that. Somehow it ended up... And yet there was a lot of explaining to do on the sheets as well. Anyway, Alison, that's a funny tale of regaling a time in New Plymouth. You have a fun day. Good morning. It's Jono and Ben on the hips. Now I want to know, Anyway, Alison, that's a funny tale of regaling a time in New Plymouth. You have a fun day. Morning.

It's Jono and Ben on the hips. Now, I want to know, on our 800, the hits, 4487 on the text, what have you gone above and beyond as a parent? Because last night, my daughter, Sienna, she wanted to start gym class. I was like, oh, cool, we'll go along to that. And I took her along last night at 545. And then I said... And you did a CrossFit class with her?

Oh, no, it was like gymnastics. Oh, gymnastics. Yeah, she wants to do gymnastics because she's really good on the tramp and does flips and she is a good flipper yeah she does a good flipper she is

she does it on the lawn as well yeah cartwheels and all that sort of stuff so I'm like great yeah we can go along to do this and I said to the

teacher I said oh how long is this because I'm going to wait around and they're like two hours oh it's a long time it's a lot you know it's like two hours it needs to be two hours we're not training for Beijing that's. It's a long time. It's a lot, you know. It's like, two hours?

It needs to be two hours. Oh, not training for Beijing. That's right. It's a first class. They came out, oh, jeez, the kids looked tired at the end of the two hours. I bet they did.

All red-faced. It's 120 minutes of exercise. I've never done that in my entire life. But I was like, yeah, but I was like, it's a fair thought for me, sitting there the whole time, you know. Sitting there.

You know, just sitting there. Just sitting there, waiting. Waiting for two hours. I was like, I a thought for me, sitting there the whole time, you know? Sitting there. You know, just sitting there. Just sitting there, waiting. Waiting for two hours. Watching kids do flips. I'm bumming beyond. Nowhere I see, I couldn't even see the kids. I was out through the door, so I was just sitting there next to a vending machine.

So that was me for two hours. Looking, staring down a vending machine. Yeah. So I was like, well... Why don't you go away and come back and pick her up? Yeah, I probably could. That was an option. But I didn't.

No, it's because you're a good parent. Yeah, that's right. I would be there. Make sure she's safe. It's all good. I'm a good parent. So I was like, when have you gone above and beyond for your kids? What have you done?

What next level? Like you, didn't Oscar swallow a marble when he was really little? Oh, when he was like two or three, yeah. And the doctor's like, there's nothing you can do. You've just got to wait for nature to take its course. But once nature has taken its course, one of you will have to, yeah, just monitor. Monitor. Yeah.

It was a hands-on job. Oh, jeez. And listen, let's just say, there's only one person I'd do that for. Two people, actually. Ben and him. And I really appreciate it. And I did it last week, yeah. And we found those marbled knuckle bones. He swallowed nine knuckle bones.

Remember knuckle bones? Yeah. Yeah, I was like, stop eating those, mate. Because you know what's going to happen. I'm going to have to find them. We did it in the work toilet. We've got seven of them anyway. There's still two floating around in there somewhere.

So when have you gone above and beyond as a parent? What have you sat through? What have you done in the name of being a good parent? Love to hear from you. And don't forget, we've got Fiji Five-0 packs to give away. Carolyn, we've been told you're first cab off the rank. You're going to bring the noise. No pressure on this call, Caro.

Oh, crap. Okay. So I have literally sat through hundreds and hundreds of hours of music lessons from my daughter getting a recorder when she was six. And she is now in her first year. Thank you, Jono. I've got a recorder too.

We have something in common, me and your six-year-old. Thank you, Johnny. I've got a recorder too. We have something in common, me and your six-year-old. So you guys are recording lessons. Well, it started with recorder and then it went to guitar and then it went to keyboard and then it went to flute and now she can pick up any instrument, but she's in her first year at Waikato doing a Bachelor of Music to become a music teacher and music therapist. Oh, so it's all paid off. It was a long play and I bet you sat through hours of shabby music as well. Hours.

They don't start out being good. No. And it's not just in the classroom. It's at home as well. Oh, yeah. It's pretty much they were in a thousand hours of something to get good. Isn't that the story, I think?

Oh, well, spare a thought for Carolyn, who sat through a thousand hours of... Carolyn, we're going to put you our Fiji prize pack. Celebrate Fiji Independence Day. Fiji 5-0 pack is all yours, all right? Great. Good on you. Sarah.

Sarah, how are you? Hey, good, thanks, guys. How's Wellington this morning, mate? Oh, yeah, it's still. Good day? Good day, can't beat it. It's a good day. You can't beat it on a good day.

You can't beat anywhere on a good day, but anyway. Sarah, when did you go above and beyond for the kids? I spent four hours last night making mermaid tails for the top of my four-year-old's birthday cake. Oh, God. Four hours. Are they edible ones? What a hero.

They are. They are edible and shimmery and gold and, you know, all those kinds of fun things. Here's a hero. They are edible and shimmery and gold and you know, all those kinds of fun things. Here's a question, would mermaids be so as appealing as they are now if we swapped them around? So a fish head and human legs. Little less appealing.

Yeah. Well done going above and beyond for your kids. That's impressive. We're going to flick you out a $200 Fiji 5-0 price pack, all right? Amazing. Thanks, guys. The Prince and the Little Mermaid. He took a risk, didn't he?

Hooking up with a half-fish, half-human. Yeah, I don't even know about the time, though. Oh, I didn't know at the time. Because she got short legs and stuff. But mind you, when she dropped the bomb of like, oh, I'm half-fish, you'd be like, oh, okay, okay. That was something you should have put on your Tinder profile. Vanessa, you're also on Wellington.

Here, it's a good day. Can't beat it. Yeah, can't beat it. When you went above and beyond for the kids, Vanessa, when was it, matey? Well, I just feel like every single day, I'm a taxi driver and a personal chef, and whatever they want, I'm pretty much a slave.

So I think that every day I go above and beyond. Ah, yeah, you're an unpaid personal assistant. They've never given you a five-star rating on the Uber service, have they, Vanessa? No, I'm still hopeful for that. You've never taken Instagram photos of the meals you provide and put them on social media tagging you in, have they? No, they haven't.

Yeah, well, well done. Well, we're going to reward you with something, a $200 price pack from Fiji, a Fiji Five-0 price pack worth $200, alright? Thank you so much, it's amazing. You have a great day driving kids around. Thank you too. And as a special treat, a recorder solo from Jono Pryor as well.

That's just for you, Vanessa. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. Kia ora, I'm Ash Thomas and this is The B***ing News. So producer Juliette teams up with our newsreader Ash Thomas in some sort of sick, perverted way to explain international headlines to us and she beeps out certain words and makes us...

It's the equivalent of when someone's like, oh, you know, I know this little secret, but I can't say anything. Yeah, why do they even say that? I don't know, it's like antagonising you. You're like, I can't tell you, I can't say anything. Yeah, why do they even say that? I don't know, it's like antagonising you. You're like, is it? No, I can't tell you, I can't tell you. All you'd love to know, but I can't tell you. Well, here's producer Juliet egging us on with news and beats.

So you've beeped a word in actual news headlines that Ash Thomas has read. What's the first one? After 3,000 years, make a comeback to mainland Australia. Well, I'm going to say the original Wiggles make a comeback after 3,000 years. Surely they can wheel them all out in Australia.

They've woken Jeff up and he's back in the game. He's back, guys. Get him out there. I'm going to say Pauline Hanson's making a comeback after 3,000 years. Who's that? She's a racist old Australian lady, aka 58% of the population. After 3,000 years, Tasmanian devils make a comeback to mainland Australia. Now, when I read this headline,

I actually thought that Tasmanian devils were all over Australia, even though the name suggests they're only in Tasmania. Oh, but you would have think that one of them would have, you know, hopped on a boat or hopped on a plane to some stage and, you know, gone. Yeah. Well, back in the day, they were across all of Australia, but I think all the dingoes just got into them. So they were only on, they only survived on Tasmania.

So they've released a few and Chris Hemsworth helped release them. Oh, really? And I was like, oh, so wholesome, Chris. I love you even more. He's so hot. I know. Gosh. Are they the sort of thing you want to release?

That's exactly what I thought. Aren't they quite aggressive? They've got a good sort of short man syndrome, don't they? The Tasmanian devil. Oh, I know, gosh. Are they the sort of thing you want to release? That's exactly what I thought. Aren't they quite aggressive? They've got a good sort of short man syndrome, don't they, the Tasmanian devil? Oh, I don't know. I only think of the Looney Tunes, Taz, you know, he's wild. Anything like that, I don't know. You could not control that guy. He's spinning around. Yeah, I know

what you're saying, Ben, boys. You don't want those roaming around Australia. And as if mainland Australia need more, you know, scary animals. Yeah. You know, I'd be like, okay, there's Tas, Ben, boys. You don't want those roaming around Australia. And as if mainland Australia need more, you know, scary animals. Yeah. You know, I'd be like, okay, there's Tasmanian devils on mainland Australia.

I'm moving into another country. So they're reintroducing Tasmanian devils, but then kicking out every New Zealander to make room for the Tasmanian devils. Exactly, all right.

All right, let's hear the next news headline that's been beeped. Facebook blocks picture of a***** for being too sexy. Well, Facebook's blocks picture of a** for being too sexy. Well, Facebook's blocked a picture of someone for being too sexy. I'm going to say it's your nudes, Jono. Only fans.

You know what I was going to say? I was going to say it was his nudes. Well, one of us could be right. There we go. Facebook blocks picture of onions for being too sexy. Oh, no. Completely not right. Yeah, onions.

So the algorithm kind of mucked up and saw a couple of onions, sort of skin-coloured circular things, probably mistook them for breasts and took them down and this old

fruit and veg shop was not happy about it. They were like, mate, they're photos of onions and it's made headlines because of that. Can we speak to a guy

in New Zealand who makes pies and his pie photo got taken down. Deemed a little too sexy. And he's like, well, it was cute, but it wasn't sexy enough.

Yeah, we did ask for the pies for sexies. Oh, they're cute. So some sort of mistake similar to that. I got lost in a hole of the top 10 sexiest foods the other day.

Oh, yeah? Foods that look like, you know, body parts. And it's like, oh, it's quite your peaches. Oh, yeah. You really have to use your imagination.

Obviously eggplant is the obvious one that everyone, you know. Yeah. But it doesn't resemble. No. No, you're right. I mean, you'd be quite worried if it did.

You'd go and see a medical professional. Yes. With the little green thing at the end too. Oh, jeez. And our final news headline this morning in News and Beeps. British retailer Marks & Spencer is now selling f***ing scraps. I'm going to say material scraps from leftover clothes. Just a sensible answer from me.

I'm going to say drunken nightclub scraps. Some of the best scraps around. I reckon Jono would get around this. British retailer Marks and Spencer is now selling fish and chip shop scraps. So you know those tiny little crusty, salty little bits that's at the bottom when you finish all your fish and chips? Oh, yeah. They're potting them up

and selling them for $2. Would you buy it? Oh, like just you buy it? Just the scratch. Yeah. People who love them love that part. Love it.

Heart disease in a bag, though, isn't it? Exactly. Is that one of your favourite parts? Dude, the crunchy bits are my favourites, yeah. So good, eh? Yeah. I would definitely buy it.

It's almost like, what is it? It's like the deep fryer just combusted and created this little ball of hardness. I don't even think it's food. No, probably not. Nice and crunchy and good, and that's the news and beeps this morning. More painful than your alarm clock. It's Jono and Ben on the hits.

You know, I'm starting to grow a deep-seated hate for show opening titles. You know, when you watch Netflix or you binge watch something and the opening credits now, they're about 35 minutes of the programme. Sometimes they give you the option to skip them. I know, but then other times you've just got to sit through. Yeah, some are really long.

Some of the first time you watch it, you're like, oh, that's cool. And then afterwards you're like, oh, come on, Game of Thrones, just start. I was going to say, I never saw Game of Thrones, but imagine that one. That would be like a 12-minute intro. Yeah, like the music's cool, but then it's just a real,

they go around all the different parts of the way. You're like, just get to know this. Just get, okay, we've seen all this. I love that show Lost, not for the show, but just because it was just Lost, the graphic on screen, and then just one second it just goes, and that was it. That was the opening title. So I was like, great, we're into it.

It's a great way to fill up content, though, isn't it, for the show? Like Peaky Blinders does the same. It's a really long, laborious I was like, great, we're into it. It's a great way to fill up content though, isn't it, for the show? Like Peaky Blinders does the same. It's a really long, laborious introduction of like sort of cinematic shots of cups of tea and things. You're like, what? What is this? But well done.

It fills up a quarter of the programme. At least with The Simpsons and stuff, they change it up. You know, they change it up. There's a new joke on the couch. There's a new joke on the, you know, Bart's writing on the blackboard. You know, you get something new. We should

have a 45 minute show opener for this programme. Starts at 6 and we don't have to do anything until quarter to 7. Well, you tried to introduce that Friday one which was the mashup from TikTok. Remember that? You were like, all those songs mashed together. You got that, Julian? It just went on.

Yeah, it's a bit of a mix. And we didn't know when to start. So we could play this for like three quarters of an hour. People like mashups, don't they? Just keep going. We're like... It's a great mashup, but we were like, oh, maybe it's too long for the show.

Well, not now, my friend. Not now that everyone's done. Because I'm watching that morning show at the moment. You've seen that? It's on Apple TV with Jennifer Aniston. It's very good. But ironically, you start watching it at night and it's the morning by the time the titles are finished.

And I try and do the skip forward thing on the remote. You know, you can go fast forward 10, 20, 30, or then it just skips on to the next episode. I can never nail it. I'm like a boomer with that. My son's having to come on and do it already. I found out with Homeland, that was another one that had a really long title.

So I don't know if you watched that show, but that was just like every week, it was just like, that was about a minute 20 in all seriousness of just titles. You're like, oh my God, is this an extra episode? Does this count as an episode?

So long. Oh, there we go. There's two old men moaning about titles. Plus the commercials are too loud and the ad breaks. They turn them up and watch it on One News and they turn up the ad, the bedpost commercials. It's more awkward than when a boomer mutes the commercial. My dad does that.

You just sit there in silence because you're like, at least the TV gave us something. But you're like, oh, okay, this is all good. I don't need the briscoe lady yelling at me. You're like, okay, well, what is all good. I don't need the briscoe lady yelling at me. You're like, okay, what are we going to talk about? I got nothing. Not a morning person? Sadly, neither of these two. It's Jono and Ben on the hits.

Let's look at some of the big news happening all over the world. Scrolling through your feed. Yes, he's been scrolling through your feed like the Russians meddling with the US elections. Don't tell Zuckerberg. He won't be happy. Ben Boyce here with all the news. Now, the iPhone 12 is due to be released today. 12?

I feel like I've missed about four versions of the iPhone somewhere along the line. They just keep flopping them out, don't they? Yeah. Who are they, trying to make a profit or something? Who are these people? And I got into a bit of an internet hole regarding iPhones, and I found an article that said,

mind-blowing facts on the iPhone. So I thought I'd read some out to you, John. I know I'm setting myself up for failure, but I want to see if your mind is blind. I'd like to remind you every time I've read out mind-blowing facts from the internet holes I've found myself in, you have showed disdain.

Nothing but disdain. Nothing has blinded my mind. Even once he's like, oh, seven facts about Delta Goodrum. Wrap it up. I was only allowed to do one fact. Seven facts was quite a lot. But anyway.

Okay, so there's 101 million iPhone users in the US. 101 million. But the population of the US is about 318 million. So a third of the population owns an iPhone. I'd like to know what the world figures. I didn't play mine. No, no. It probably makes sense. They're pretty prolific in terms of making phones. Well'd like to know what the world figures. I didn't play mine. No, no. It probably makes sense.

They're pretty prolific in terms of making phones. Well, the others are Samsung, I suppose. Yeah. You want a fact of Samsung to do with iPhones? It may blow your mind. Okay, so Samsung will make more from iPhones than its own phones. Now, they manufacture a number of iPhone parts, including memory chips and things like that.

And they actually make more money off those things for iPhones than their own Samsung phones. Oh, so they make those for Apple. manufacture a number of iPhone parts, including memory chips and things like that. And they actually make more money off those things for iPhones than their own Samsung phones. Oh, so they make those for Apple? Oh, now whose mind is that? Oh, hey, I'm on board. I'm on board. Love me an internet hole. And this thing, producer Julia,

I don't even know this is possible. I don't know if someone's trolling me, but the old headphone cords that you plug into your iPhone, kind of a thing of the past now, becoming redundant. But if you have a vintage pair of earbuds, you can actually take a picture using those. Wait, wait. Oh, there's a little clicker on the cord.

Yeah, they can take a picture, like a faraway selfie using the earbud. No, I did not. That almost blew my mind. Oh, listen, my brain is starting to seep out of my ear holes. It's about to blow. I can feel it. You can feel the pressure on the head. Well, that, my brain is starting to seep out of my ear holes. Yeah. It's about to blow. I can feel it. You can feel the pressure

on the head. Well, that's all I've got for you, but that was it. They're so tricky, aren't they, Apple? Like, kind of once you're in with them, it's just to get it.

I mean, you tried to swap phones once. It's like a kind of a mortgage. It's like you've got to, yeah, you just do it. Once you got given a phone, you're like, I'll swap over

and I'll have one of this. You were like, oh, it was the worst time in his life. And all I heard about was, why did I swap have one of this and everybody, you were like, oh, it was the worst time in his life and all I heard about was, why did I swap to this other device? Oh, it doesn't connect to my phone. I can't sync it up.

Went on for months and I was like, I think I put that phone inside your mouth and put it down your throat. No, you're still sitting in your belly, but you're running around with no case on your iPhone at the moment, Julia. It's a dangerous game. It's quite ironic because we talked about it yesterday and then yesterday when I was leaving work, I accidentally dropped it.

We had the bets going. But it didn't smash so I think I'm good. This is very cool news. A Kiwi teenager Josh, 6'8", 5'5", 17-year-old from South Auckland. You'll know his hit song, Savage Love. It's got number one in the USA. How cool is that? Number one.

It features Jason Derulo, this version, and the Korean pop singer BTS. And it's gone to number one on the US Billboard charts. So congratulations to him. That's awesome. I feel like it's already been number one, hasn't it? I always hear it every week. It's like, now it's number one in Macedonia,

and now it's number one in Slovakia. I love this story because obviously Jason Derulo wanted to sing over a song. He kind of did it, and then they kind of negotiated terms. But Josh, 6'8", 5', he's 17 years old. He was like, oh, you're going to have to deal with my mum. Jason Derulo had to deal with Josh's mum. She sorted it out with the record company and Jason Derulo

and sorted it out and got them a deal. But I thought that was pretty cool. No one ever wants to be sent to anyone's mum. So talk to my mum. She'll sort it out. Her mum'll sort it out. We know Josh's manager, and he's just saying he's just the most humble, shy human being. All he wanted to do when he got a little bit of money was buy some Nikes.

So he got those, and he might have a bit of spare change now, I imagine. But we spoke to him when this just was all blowing up. What is it like at school? Obviously, the kids, the teachers, they must know about this, right? Oh, yeah, heaps of the teachers. I think all of them, most of them, because I saw them all dancing to it on, like, a little grid

where they're all just dancing to it together. Well, jeez, I tell you what, if that doesn't get you some NCEA credits, a number one worldwide hit, I don't know what will. Just an amazing story. Would you finish school if you were him? I think I would leave. I think I'd leave.

Let's not worry about this last term, guys. I could probably produce some number one hit songs with Jason Derulo. Like starting your day without your morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben

on the hits. Spy. The What's Up by Docco.nz. I tell you what, there is no one more dedicated to celebrity gossip

than E! News. It's more of a niggle than producer Juliet's day. She's got to hunt out these stories and read them for the radio. But if you do want some good stuff, head off to E! News. But Juliet, welcome to your bulletin. Thanks so much. Now, if you two could go on holiday with any person in the world, famous or, I guess, non-famous, nah, famous,

who would you choose? I'd probably go Dwayne. I'd have to go Dwayne. Dwayne the Rock, Jocelyn. Or Kevin Hart as well. We'd be up at 4.30. We'd probably go Dwayne. I'd have to go Dwayne. Dwayne the Rock, Jason. Or Kevin Hart as well. We'd be up at 4.30. We'd be hitting the gyms. I wouldn't be lifting as much as him, but you know.

Yeah, you'd just be like injecting protein into your body at 2 a.m. in the morning. Who would I go on holiday with? Like Keith Richards or someone. From the Rolling Stones. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That'd be quite a good time. He looks like fun.

Do you know Keith Richards? He went to Fiji after they played in New Zealand, the Rolling Stones. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That'd be quite a good time. He looks like fun. Do you know Keith Richards, when he went to Fiji after they played in New Zealand, the Rolling Stones? That's right. And he was in a certain state, I guess, and he climbed a coconut tree. Not of the age where you should be

climbing coconut trees. Anyway, he severely got a head injury. Right. Was flying back to New Zealand and my friend operated on Keith. Really? When I say my friend, it was my friend's friend.

But if I take one of them out, it makes it seem... Yeah, it does. It seems like you're hanging out with doctors. Yeah. Brain surgeons and stuff. It makes me feel like a better class of person. You're not. I've never met this guy.

I've never met this guy, yeah, no. You can't operate on me, can you? No, not at all. But Taika Waititi is on holiday with the Hemsworth brothers, Chris and Liam, on an island called Lord Howe Island, which is kind of in between New Zealand and Australia. And I was looking into it.

It's only allowed a few hundred visitors at one time because they want to keep it all clean and green and stuff. Looks like Hawaii. And I'm like, Taika, what a dream, like going on holiday with the Hemsworth brothers. That is something that I would totally want to do. You need to nail your foot to the floor with someone. Last night you're dreaming about Harry Styles.

Yeah, true. Now you want to go on holiday with both of them. You're all over the place. That's me. I'm The Rock. Kevin Hart. Michael Smith. Listen, show some commitment to a celebrity you want to stalk.

I guess beggars can't be choosers, eh? And Ed Sheeran, he has spent tens of thousands of dollars to have his own forest on his $8 million estate in England. So his estate is called Sherinville, which I didn't realise had a name. It's massive. Producer Humphries was just showing us a picture of it. You think of the estate as just a house and some land, but it's like... It's a commune.

It's like a town, yeah. Like a little town. It kind of looks like Disneyland from above. Just like lots of little things dotted around the place. Didn't he build a pond in there or something? The neighbours were complaining. It'd be a nightmare for the Mozzie's. Sharon's built this whacking great pond next door.

Yeah. But the reason he wants to make his property more sustainable with the trees, sorry, is to make it more sustainable. Which I'm like, oh, good on you, Ed Sheeran. Can you ever put a foot wrong? You know? I feel like you'd be like, oh, for God's sake, why did you make it more sustainable? Yeah, I cut down trees, so I hate trees.

Yeah. I hate the oxygen they provide. No. Nightmare. The leaves. I don't like leaves. You know, I was moaning about leaves. There's leaves everywhere.

You vacuum clean yours, right? Yeah, I vacuum clean the driveway. Yeah. Yeah, like a cycle. I was mowing the road the other day. My neighbour was like, he drove past and he's like,

do you realise what you're doing? But I was mowing the road because there were leaves on the road and I couldn't be bothered picking them up so I was like, I'll just mow them

and turn them into mulch. Oh. Yeah, but there's quite a lot of stones sort of spitting into my shins and things like that. Oh, great. Listen, don't mow the road. No.

It was a life lesson learned. Or vacuum the driveway. Yeah, people judge, your neighbours judge you. They're like, who am I living next door to? Psych't mow the road. No. It was a life lesson learned. Or vacuum the driveway. Yeah, people judge. Your neighbours judge you. They're like, who am I living next door to? Psychopath mowing the road and vacuuming his drive. Exactly. And that is Spy.

For more, you can head to thehits.co.nz. Start your day the wrong way. It's Jono and Ben on the Hits. We like to end the show on a positive note. Hey, Ben. Good. Why's it going to be a good day for you? Oh, 800, the H's love to hear from you.

Big day, if you like technology, iPhone 11 is out today. That's the big news. 12, isn't it? Didn't you say? Oh, 12. Sorry. Yeah, that's an audio replaced. That was out yesterday.

Yeah, now there's iPhone 13's just been released as we've been talking as well. They just keep churning through them. Can I tell my fact again? Yeah, you can share your iPhone fact. It was quite interesting. The Samsung one, yeah, I thought it was quite good. This morning we read some mind-blowing iPhone facts. And Samsung apparently make more money from iPhones than their own phones

because they also make parts for iPhones, like memory chips and things like that, which makes them more money than their phones. Wow. Yeah, see, now there's a... Apparently, apparently. Yeah, yeah, my mind... They're great phones. My mind has been blown, Ben Boyce.

A lot of times you say mind-blowing facts, and minds don't get blown, do they? No, as well as that, there was another one I didn't think you would blow your mind. 941, if you look at every iPhone ad, it's at 941 on the phone. Don't know why, but it's at 941. I actually have a fact about watches and clocks.

If you see ads for, you know, analogue, analogue's the right word, eh? The ones that you can hang on the walls. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The arms are sort of tilted up in a wide V shape because it's associated with a smile. So when you look at a clock face or a watch face,

an ad, it's always going to be pointing at, I think, maybe, I don't know what the numbers are on a clock. When I look at the clock at 3.40am, I am always smiling when we get up for this job, so that makes a lot of sense. So we're going to go to the phones. You just tell us why it's going to be a good day. We'll head to Mitzi in Hamilton. You can kick things off.

Tell us why it's going to be a good day, Mitzi. It's going to be a good day because I'll be finished working 10 minutes time. I'm a truck driver and I've been driving since early hours of this morning. And it's a gorgeous day out here in Hamilton. Oh, lovely. We all finished making 10 minutes time. That's great. Nine o'clock.

That's great. And it says here on the note, you've been living in New Zealand for 16 years today. So congratulations. Thanks, mate. Rosie in the Waikato. Why is it going to be a good day for you? Rosie. for 16 years today, so congratulations. Thanks, mate. Rosie in the Waikato. Why is it going to be a good day for you? Rosie.

Oh, hi. Because I'm driving to Auckland to meet up with my work colleagues that I haven't seen since I left Auckland in the first lockdown in March. That is crazy. Wow. Oh, some FaceTime with the work colleagues. That would be great. Oh, some FaceTime with the work colleagues. That'd be great. Yeah, real, the real talk, it's not just Skype meetings. That's months and months and months, right?

That's, wow. Probably by the end of the day, you'll realise why you've enjoyed not seeing them face-to-face. Good on you, Rosie. Got a Fiji prize pack. You'll enjoy that. We'll head to Tanya in Christchurch. Tanya, you're on the air.

Hi, how are you? Yeah, we're doing well, matey. What's going to Tanya in Christchurch. Tanya, you're on the air. Hi, how are you? Yeah, we're doing well, matey. What's going to be a good day for you, Tanya? Well, I just dropped the kids off at school and I've done all the housework yesterday, so I'm just going to have a meat day today. Oh, lovely. Take a lie down on a sharkty mat and treat yourself, Tanya.

Yeah. All right, Fiji PrizePack coming your way. You have a great day. You too, Listing, as well. We really appreciate everyone, Listing. We'll do it all again tomorrow. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys' weekdays from 6 on The Hits

and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast. Friends of Skinny.