Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Priest spends $40,00 on Candy Crush?!

Episode Date: May 5, 2024

Welcome to the untamed realm of the world's Wild Wild Web!  On this edition we look into a priest who spent $40,000 of his church's money on candy crush...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today on the Wild Wild Web, what was a priest arrested for? The answer will surprise you. Welcome to the untamed realm of the World Wide Web. A swirling vortex of weirdness, bullying and self-obsessed social media posts. In this digital jungle, Jono and Vienna are your fearless guides. Leading you through the wildest parts of the Wild Wild Web. This is the Wild Wild Web. Hello, welcome Benjamin Ross Boyce, Megan Louise Puffus, Jonathan Richard Pryor. We are back, we are back and saying some stuff into a microphone. Yeah we are. These are stories

that have captured our attention. This one I saw over the weekend. I thought it's perfect for the wild, wild web. A priest arrested for spending $40,000, taking over $40,000 worth of funds from his church. Have a guess. Megan, I think you've seen this article, so maybe not you'd guess it, but do you want to have a guess what you think he was spending the money on? Sex stuff.

Sex stuff, just to make the story more embarrassing. That would be The good guess But it's not Yeah it's not Not sex stuff No Is it exciting Well no

It's very unusual Like if you're going to spend $40,000 on something It's exciting for him Yeah Compost He's a gardening fanatic Horse racing

Candy crush $40,000 On candy crush I thought you were going to say Son of a Yeah So he used Horse racing Candy Crush 40 grand on Candy Crush You were going to say Yeah So he used the church's credit card To foot his Candy Crush addiction And yeah

Like over the years Over three years He clocked up more than $40,000 Worth of fees on Candy Crush You're just buying stars, right? You're buying more lives because you run out of lives and then you have to wait.

That's all you do. To be honest, I haven't played enough to buy Candy Crush. But I know that you can buy more lives so you don't have to wait. But I don't know what else you'd spend money on. It is an addictive game. I've never played it.

It's pretty fun. Apps, jeez, they can really sign you up to some crazy costs on the apps. I remember we had to, running a restaurant, Papa, you downloaded one, it was like running a restaurant or something. Oh, yeah. And somehow, I don't know, we needed to invest in the restaurant with actual money, and then we had a lot of disappointed customers, and then you kind of

paid fines and oh my god it's the ideal scam an app if you can come up with a good game yeah

did you ever play Farmville I'd heard of it I feel like that was on was that a Facebook game I think it was a Facebook game yeah

is that kind of you grow crops and then you harvest the crops and then you plant more and manage the farm it sounds stupid but it was so addictive those games kind of are though aren't they yeah that's the crops and then you plant more. Manage the farm. It sounds stupid, but it was so addictive.

Those games kind of are though, aren't they? Yeah. That's the thing, they get you in on you. And Kim Kardashian's game. She had a game. What was that even called now? I can't remember, but I spent actual money on that. I'm going to Google it.

She made actual money. She made so much money off that. It was like you were Kim and you were living her life, you know? And so you could wear outfits, you meet people, you had to make decisions. Kim Kardashian Hollywood? Yeah. And how did it extort money out of you? So like what you're wearing and then you'd meet people

and they would offer you things and you'd have to make a decision. Am I going to like accept that offer? Am I going to turn it down? Because then you accept some offers and then they end up like blabbing something personal about you you know like all right decisions about are you trying to better her career you are kim yeah well you're not but yeah you're trying to make it in hollywood as kim i guess it was her way to being like see it's not that easy to be me has she started from

the ray j saucy tape stage? Or where are we starting? Ground Zero? No, I think it's like you're a young fashionista kind of. She's just glazed over the sex tape. Isn't that impressive? Oh, right. Yeah, but that's a good way to shoot yourself to popularity, though, isn't it? Yeah.

And it worked. And I was so addictive. There's many theories that Kris Jenner orchestrated the release of that. Oh, the tape. Yeah, that's the rumour, right. And it worked. Hey, well, if that was the plan, the's the rumour right and it worked hey well if that was the plan

the game plan well so you would say it was relatively successful yeah well I guess Kim's kind of embraced it now

hadn't she in a lot of ways but you know yeah you'd hope that if it was an orchestrated release she was in on it rather than not really

there's nothing for her to be ashamed of which I always find quite interesting like everyone's always like yeah it did a sex tape but what

it's her like life yeah exactly it's probably just the embarrassment for a lot of people getting it out there if you ever undersee it yeah

she didn't do anything wrong she was just engaging in relations with with her partner yeah if you want to see some wrong stuff on a sex tape

check out the Jono Cryophiles. Very depressing watch. But she, everyone's like, she's so dumb. They're all dumb, vacant people. They're not. You don't get to that level of wealth. Nah.

They've made some very smart business decisions. And also, in Hollywood, people are so quick, too. You think about the amount of people they must meet. Everyone would be wanting to bring them down, and no one's been able to. So if there was a really terrible story, or if they were really terrible people, their career would have been brought down by now. Because I met Chloe and she and her best friend Malika.

They were so nice. Oh, were they? Where did you meet Chloe? I interviewed her in Australia. Did you? Yeah. What did so nice. Oh, were they? Where did you meet Chloe? I interviewed her in Australia. Did you? Yeah. What did you say to her? I wasn't allowed to.

Also, they were filming, so I had to sign a waiver for keeping up with the Kardashians. They were doing a shoe launch or a clothing launch with their kids' clothes, and it was to do with Hannah's, the footwear brand. Oh, right. So I went over there, And it was all off. Oh, they might have been filming. Maybe that's why. But I wasn't interviewing her at the time.

And she came up, introduced herself. Her best friend was like, hi, how are you? Do you need anything? I was like, what? And you were just hanging around waiting for them? Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's very nice. So was there a whole lot of other media there?

Yeah, yeah. So we did the thing where you line up and you take your turn. So she would have spoken to so many people that day oh that's really cool she was really nice they hustle they hustle hard

and good on them good on them I uh sorry back to the the games did you ever play a game called Larry the Lounge Lizard oh yeah

do you remember playing Larry was it Leisure Suit Larry oh Leisure Suit Larry yeah yeah and he was a bit of a he was a bit of a pants man Larry and he'd sort of sift

it was like the naughtiest oh my god he looks like a he was a bit of a pants man, Larry, and he'd sort of sift. It was like the naughtiest. Oh, my God. He looks like a, he almost looks like the Foursquare Man. Yeah, but it was like the dodgy brother of the Foursquare Man, basically. And the game was he had to sift around nightclubs and seedy strip parlours and just be a general pest, I think. And see, looking it up right now, I was thinking, I don't know what, yeah, it was a soft porn adventure, basically.

Yeah. A middle-aged man knowing for his porn head. And it was pornography when I was thinking i don't know what yeah it was a soft porn adventure basically a middle-aged man knowing for his head um that was pornography when i was growing up yeah and he would go along and yeah definitely wrong in today in today's society but anyway it was very exciting because you got to see some uh animated bosoms and uh let's just say the uh the animations come leaps and bounds since Leisure Suit Larry days. But yeah, we used to play that. And what games did you play when you were growing up? Oh, I just saw one of the names of Leisure Suit Larry, Wet Dreams Don't Dry. Wet Dreams Don't Dry.

It was like a kind of a comedy thing, I think. Carmen Santiago was one I used to play a lot at school. Carmen Santiago. Oregon Trail, did they make you a lot at school Carmen Santiago Oregon Trail did they make you play that at school what Trail

it was kind of a mathematical game it was an educational game oh that's me out well that was what Carmen Santiago kind of was right you had the

multi-choice options geography where it could be and then you're like yeah and then it'd be like a vile henchman you must be on the right track

yeah a vile henchman Sonic the Hedgehog didman yeah Sonic the Hedgehog yeah did you play Sonic the Hedgehog on Sega yeah I loved Crash the original Crash Bandicoot

Crash Bandicoot was kind of my jam what's the Spyro the Dragon yeah I love Spyro yeah Pac-Man was good

even going to the space season stuff as well so a lot of those games are kind of coming back now Street Fighter yeah like Street Fighter and that but done properly

you know done like amazingly with today's world. That was a wonderful period in New Zealand where you'd go to the dairy and there'd be three space invaders and you'd just hang outside the dairy and play Spaces. Wasn't that great? Chewing on K-bars. Yeah, K-bars. I love K-bars.

You're right. You'd have to order fish and chips and you'll just be able to play one game on the Spaces, you know, while you're waiting. Can I get a K-bar after fish and chips? Yeah, so happy. It's sad that generations don't get to experience the Spaces now. No, but they get their phone. Listen, they've got a far better life now.

Whatever we witness, they get to witness it on their phone, you know. Did you know K-bars were Whittakers? I didn't. They've always were Whittakers? I didn't. They've always been Whittakers. Have they? It's on the label. Took you about nine hours to finish one, didn't they? Yeah. Do they still make them? I'm just looking on their website. I saw some.

Yeah, I bought some somewhere, but you don't see them as much anymore. They were kind of the iconic candy from back in the day. I wonder if you can buy them online. Spaceman lollies that used to have the red tips on it, but then they took the red tips off. Oh, yeah, the cigarettes. No, they totally knew what they were doing.

The spacemen, the spaceman lollies. I reckon they were owned by the cigarette industry. They were just planting them with the kids. They were always fun. You know, you'd be like, pfft. Yeah, you felt good. And then your dad would send you down. Did Kevin Boyce ever smoke

he used to smoke a pipe oh right yeah did he dad would send me down the road he had some sort of arrangement going on with the

dairy owner where I was allowed to go and pick up dad's packs of tins, benches and hedges a lot of trust a lot of trust

in those days didn't you yeah you get a 50 cent mix if you're lucky as well so yeah the dairy was a fun place to go down to.

It was like a big outing, wasn't it? It was. You had to go to the dairy. Yeah. My friend used to own the video store. He was like, his parents owned the video store. So that was fun. He was a great friend to hang out with.

You could have watched anything. Yeah. You used to watch movies. The frustrating thing was that you'd be watching something and you'd be like, oh yeah. And then the parents would come and go, sorry guys, someone's just rented that.

You're going to have to, because you know, they weren't making any money off the one we were watching. So you're like, oh, halfway through Back to the Future.

Like, yeah, sorry, you know, like. And so you'd have to pick it up at a later date. Yeah,

but games and things like that, that was, yeah, it was awesome. You know, it was, it was a wonderful friend to have. A powerful friend.

Just going to take a quick break from the Wild Web. We'll be back shortly. Welcome back. I had a friend who owned a dairy. That was a powerful friend to have. Because that was just like, help yourself. Oh, they help yourself. Jeez.

Yeah. I remember just distinctly sitting out the back, and they had those wonderful sort of wooden beads things, It's like, help yourself. Oh, they help yourself. Jeez. Yeah. Yeah. It was, yeah. I remember just distinctly sitting out the back and, you know, they had those wonderful sort of wooden beads things which separated home and professional. Yeah, you're right. And you would sit out there having a feast. Huge feast. Sorry you've lost me because I'm buying K-bars online. Oh, you can buy them.

$1.50 or you can buy like packs. Wow. That's pretty cheap, isn't it? $1.50. Yeah. That's really gone up too. I mean, you can buy them. $1.50 or you can buy like packs. Oh, she's very cheap, isn't she? $1.50. She's getting in there. Yeah. It hasn't really gone up too. I mean, you know, with inflation and everything.

I'll probably lose the composites on my teeth. They'll probably cough. If you, if you, yeah, you can't. They're quite, they do require a lot of jaw work, the K-bars. Okay, one lolly. You can only have one lolly for the rest of your life. Do you know, mine's probably controversial. It's one of those like boiled raspberries.

Oh, okay. Those little round, like raspberry drops. Yeah. Also, can I advocate for those people that make the sour Fijoas or the Fijoas and the little apricots? Oh, yeah. It's a New Zealand company. Macy's.

Oh, okay. Their lollies are legit. The RJ's ones, I think it's New Zealand as well too. They're quite good. The red licorice with chocolate inside. Have you tried the American licorice? Like Twizzlers? I don't know if I have. Disgusting.

Really? Tastes like plastic. It's really plasticky. I'm like, yeah, it's nothing on RJ's. So are you locking in A Can I just like Do a blanket On Macy's lollies

Or Okay the raspberry drops Raspberry drops Okay What happens if I'm buying One of those packs That come with some fruit bursts Some minties

The party pack The party pack It's got What are the The milkshakes in there as well What are you taking first I'm like offering it to you What are you taking

Milkshake Yeah milkshakes Yeah Okay That's a great are you taking first? I'm offering it to you. What are you taking? Milkshake. Yeah, milkshakes. Yeah. Milkshake, okay. That's a great lolly. How about you? Probably a fruit burst or a minty would be the go-to. Are you a banana fruit burst guy?

I do like banana and strawberry, yeah. I don't mind it. I like the fruit burst. Just not orange. Take it out of there. A minty's an interesting one to dive first into. Minty's good. There's only enough minties.

Minties used to have a great campaign of sports montage. There's moments like this, you need Mintys. And they were just an ad full of bloopers of sports. They probably paid exorbitant rights for it, just to advertise candy. I don't reckon they even probably paid for it. Nah, probably just banged it all. It's like people hitting themselves in the face

with like basketballs and bloopers. Yeah. Yeah. Mintys are underrated. It's a very good mint. We should put something up on our social media today. Okay, you've got the party mix of lo bloopers. Yeah. Yeah. Minties are underrated. It's a very good mint. We should put something up on our social media today. Yeah. Okay, you've got the party mix of lollies.

Yeah. What's the first one you're going for? Yeah. Has anyone ever done the best fruit burst flavour? Yeah, I think we've done that before. I've done it on my social. A lot of people went crazy on that one. People have a lot of opinions on that one.

It doesn't exist anymore. Peach was the best. Yeah, peach was the one. Actually, I did it over a road trip for summer. And yeah, peach was the one that came back up a lot. Is there a grape one? Yeah, there's a grape one. No, it's wild berry.

Oh, sorry. It's purple. So it was a purple one. Yeah, peach. I don't know why they got rid of peach. Yeah. Oh, I don't know. Do you know tangy apple and tangy grape?

Do you know them? Those little wrapped lollies? Yes, I do. Those are legit as well. Yeah, those are good. How Do you know them? Those little wrapped lollies? Yes, I do. Those are legit as well. Those are good. How are you, mate? Kate Roger, is it? Yeah.

Yeah. Is it? Yeah. Roger. Film critic Kate Roger waving through the window there. What was I going to say? Oh, Tangy Fruits. Oh, they were.

In the movies. Those things were. There's some people who did sell those. Did they? Yeah. That'd be very stale. Yeah. Maybe they were just a re-release... Some movie theaters still sell those. Do they? Yeah. They'd be very stale. Yeah. Maybe they'll just re-release.

when they got rid of those. That was just a staple. You've got your popcorn and your... So very noisy for the movie theater though. Yeah. And that little plastic pottle. And Mastered and the movie theater used to have like wooden floors and steps

all the way down. So people would just sit at the back and try and roll. And you could hear it go, diggity, and you're like, oh, roll mine. And you just listen for it, how far try and roll. And you could hear it go, diggity, and you're like, oh, roll mine. And you just listen for it,

how far it could roll. And it was rolling, rolling. Ah, stopped. Okay, that was about four seconds. You go. And then you just see who could roll them underneath all the seats.

How many taggy fruits are rolling around on the floor? Oh, yeah, it was a complete waste. But as a kid, you'd be trying to roll those. And they'd have half time at the movies.

Remember that? Would they? At Masterton. Maybe it was just a Masterton thing. Oh, half time. Masterton, they're trying a Masterton thing Masterton they were trying to get more snacks

into it to stop the movie stop the movie abruptly you'd go out and then you'd be able to get snacks and then you'd go

to the bathroom and then you'd go what the fuck is happening in the movie again it was quite a good team talk little thing going oh

so that's oh that guy's how long was half time 10 minutes it wasn't it wasn't like going to the theatre it wasn't like 15-20 minutes little thing going, oh, that guy's easy. How long was half time? I don't know. 10 minutes? It wasn't like going to the theatre. It wasn't like 15, 20 minutes. It was probably just, yeah, maybe it was a massing thing.

I remember it. We didn't have it in development. Great, genius play to get some more transactions. Yeah, it didn't last for long, but I remember going to the movies and then you come out and you're like, oh, okay, so that's the dad. Oh, that's the dad. I get it now. And then you come back in and watch the second half were they allowed

to stop the movie probably not that's probably why they stopped it it was Marston no one cared growing up Marston was that the most

exciting thing to do in Marston growing up it was yeah it was pretty good we had a laser strike for a while underneath the movie theatre

but that closed down eventually that was fun although why don't you have a laser strike you have a laser strike maybe that was a problem

yeah whole lot of like tunnels it was massive it was actually really cool it was like a playground with all these tunnels and it was like

all you basically crawl under these things it was really cool but then after a while people are peeing in them I was about to say people are peeing people are living in them

you crawl around the corner and go you know like you guys huffing the glue yeah but it was really really cool at the start it was a massive tunnel connection thing it was all yeah but it was really really cool at the start it was a massive

tunnel connection thing it was all yeah was it historic or just a playground no it was just like a playground they built whatever it was

I don't know it was there but they built all these tunnels it was cool I feel like kids would do dodgy things in their day

yeah it was all sort of tagging and all sorts of stuff nonsense I'd crawl through human feces through this bloody thing

it's not worth it anymore but that was cool that was fun what was the highlight of Nelson when you were growing up like the big attraction did you have a McDonald's

State Force Green Cinema we did have a McDonald's we never did a Marston for a while we do now obviously but yeah we had

I remember when McDonald's came though it was we had a KFC always and then we got McDonald's yeah so you know who owns the Nelson McDonald's

it was Guy Williamstead. Was it? Yeah. Yeah, Gary. That's what he had when he was growing up. Wow. Was there only one McDonald's in Nelson? There's a few now, but yeah, there was one when I grew up.

Might not have been that one, but yeah, that was the epic claim. So Macca's was the big, that was the Eiffel Tower of Nelson. Or you could go, like, we had bumper boats and a hydro slide. That was pretty epic. Well, it's still there. You can go on the hydro slide still. Wait for turbo time. People used to block up the thing and then like shoot their asses down.

Remember we went to Nelson and tried to break the record for the world's largest G string. I think we did break the record. Yeah, we broke the record for the world's largest G string in Nelson. There's a big park there in Tahuna. Yeah, people turned up. Yeah, that's where the hydro slide is. Oh, we did break the record. Yeah, we broke the record for the world's largest G-string in Nelson, in the big park there in Tahuna. Yeah, people turned up. Yeah, that's where the hydro slide is. Oh, right. In Tahuna.

Yeah. Yeah, it was a big old... That's right. It was a random thing. It was just like, hey, we've got this massive G-string. Big, big G-string. Where was it from?

Someone made it. Yeah, like a costume designer made it. It was massive. And then we got a... I wonder if it's online. I'll see if it... Yeah. It was like the big...

The BFG had a G-string. This would have been the big friendly giant's G-string. Also, you did it in Tahuna. Like, that's where all the, that's where Natureland is. That's where the Hydra Slide. Oh, that's all there. That's the kids' playground. Like, it's a very kid-friendly zone.

Oh, it wasn't like everyone was naked or anything. No, you're like, hey, kids, come flick the giant g-string. There's no record of it. So it didn't really happen. Kate Roger again? Yeah, stop flirting out the window. She's a good source. I see her on the beach in Whangamata quite regularly, Kate Roger.

She's got her batch there. Did she see you seeing her on the beach? No, no. Well, and she's like, I don't want to interrupt you you're with your family and i'm the same with her so we kind of just we acknowledge right each other's presence uh but did you find it the world's biggest history no it was massive it really happened i'm pretty sure it took like 40 people to hold it yeah was it a guinness world world record thing well it could have been if we didn't pay for it.

No, it's hard. It's hard to get there. You have to pay a fee to get a Guinness World Record. It's quite the process. Yeah, it's a fade out on that one. But it was, yeah. It's just taking me to the Nelson Bendon outlet for me to buy a big drinking drink. Yeah, John Owen Bendon, I think.

It's a lot of things. Yeah. Anyway, it was a fun thing we did. But anyway. Yeah, what is the one the one thing you've done in radio where you're like

well that was a roaring success much like the world's biggest g-string where there's no actual record of us doing that but you know recorded material

do you mean like a failure no oh a big success yeah I don't even know. Nothing.

No, I don't know. There's nothing that you would go, that went well. A massive standout. Why am I drawing a blank? There was a lot of marriages when you're at the edge, wasn't there? They went well. Yeah. I think I only experienced one marriage when I was on the breakfast show

it was kind of married at first sight before married at first sight it was yeah I've got one photo but it's no g-string in the photo I've just found on my thing

but that was the amount of people that turned up to get in the g-string oh my god at a random part there was a lot of people wait did everyone all those people

fit in the g-string yeah we got as many as we could oh my god and like you say a lot of children is my dad there

your dad's right there he's a naturist he's in there mate is that where you grew up there yeah Nelson not Tahuna Stoke

next to I mean it's not a massive place I had my first kiss down at Tahuna did you yeah planned

no just happened outside the KFC on a Toyota Subaru it was white and he was a dick but that white and he was a dick. But that's okay. He was a dick.

Yeah. Generally the first kiss, the guy is a dick. Yeah. Yeah. I can't remember where I had my first kiss. Do you even remember who it was? Mine was a friend of a guy I liked. I was like, well, if I can't get the guy.

You're the next best thing. Yeah. I found an article online. Are you still going? I just wanted to make sure it existed. I get the guy. You're the next best thing. Yeah. I found an article online. Oh, you're still going. I just wanted to make sure it existed. A fair juggle of just like padding. Nelson Mail, Nelson Mail, 23rd of May, 2017. No photo, but it says,

a giant G-string was opened to many puns by popular drive announcers, and when it came to breaking a world record, they gave it a good crack. There you go, good pun. Nice pun. Attempt to break the world record for most people in a pair of underpants,

the Edge Drive announces. Hit Tahuna Park. About 500 locals attended. There you go. Bloody hell. 28-meter circumference of a hot pink G-string. Nelson Tatalian successfully surpassed the world record held by American group of 169. Why did we not take a photo of it?

Ben Boyce, it must have been. Ben Boyce said it was for a country at the bottom of the world. There you go. Are you looking for your Instagram? No. Did Instagram exist when you did this? Yeah, it was in 2017. Well, anyway, that was...

It's not that long ago. Yeah. Why is it not... Did no one take a photo of George? It must be on the Instagram back then. I was just looking at articles online. Is it on your Jono and Ben Instagram? Yeah, maybe it would have been.

I mean... Now, but the problem is we've built it up too much now. I know, I was going to say, now I don't know if I really... It's not like everyone just standing in a big bit of material. You know, like, imagine just the elastics that everyone was... It's not like we're all squeezing into the same pair of underwear. Right. But there you go, it existed.

We've got an article. Sorry, I got quite sidetracked with that. The world's biggest G-string. Maybe we can relive those moments here on The Hits. Could do that if you want, Megan. Down with that. Yep. G-string? Done. Yeahive those moments here on the hits could do that if you want Megan yep g-string done

yeah okay let's do it hey well that's been the wild wild web today really really appreciate you listening go and

have a wonderful day