Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - September 24 - Reception Reception, Rhys Darby, Jono's Neighbour Keeps Giving Him Cake

Episode Date: September 24, 2020

Hello loyal listeners! Today we played Reception Reception but with a bit of a twist. After weeks of Jono leaving embarrassing messages about Ben to random receptionists around the country, Ben finally got his revenge and did it to Jono for the first time. And boy did he get revenge! We also chatted to a lady who hit two holes in one, during ONE round of golf! She gave us inspiration for when we go down to Taupo to try and hit a hole in one, so we can win someone $10K! Jono is also worried because his neighbour keeps gifting him cakes, and he feels bad because he doesn't have any skill or talents that he can return the favour. So if you have any ideas on what Jono can do for his neighbour to say thank you, feel free to DM us on Instagram @thehitsbreakfast! Any and all ideas welcome. Enjoy the poddy!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jono and Ben, new to your mornings. Friends of Skinny, New Zealand's most recommended telco. Happy, happy, happy, oh, oh. Just when you thought you couldn't get enough of Jono and Ben, you can have them anywhere, anytime. Welcome to the Jono and Ben podcast. Hey, welcome to the podcast. Lovely to have every single one of you with us and your pairs of ears. Unless you suffered a horrific ear accident somewhere

with some heavy machinery, maybe you're missing an ear, well then it's a pleasure to have your single, your singular ear. We're happy to have everyone listening. However you're digesting the podcast, we're happy. Whether you are using it to get to sleep, whether you're using it...

It's probably quite good to get to sleep, eh? Yeah, it's a good little sleeping pill, this one. You've got problems sleeping? Just put our podcast on, you'll be asleep in no time. Yeah, Ben, you know I'm a sucker for an internet list. You know, they pop up on the bottom. Generally at the bottom of the Herald and things, it's like, you won't believe what Alec Baldwin looks like now.

And you click through 920 windows to get to the... It does take a while to get to the one that you've seen on the frame at the start, right? Usually not very satisfying as well, the final results. You're like, oh, well, yeah. Yeah. They get you. They get you. Yeah, 25 celebrities whose legs are bigger than their arms.

And you get lost in these things. But I'm in one right now, which I think you'll appreciate. These are five mind-blowing facts, and I want to read all five out and see if by the end of it... Oh, they blow my mind. ...if your brain matter is splattered against the studio window at the end of it, okay? You ready for the first one? Yeah, go. The first oranges weren't actually orange.

Oh, no, I had heard that. Oh, okay. I think we talked about that on the radio the other day, and we were like, what came first, the orange or the color? All right, so no. The color or the fruit, you know? So, yeah, no. No, mine's not blonde.

Maybe it would have blown my mind a while ago, but not currently, no. Okay, here's another one. Oh, no, now I'm lost in 900. Oh, now I'm lost in the 25 most awkward beach photos. Hold on, let me just come back here. Here we go. Do you know the name The Windy City? Chicago, not Wellington, yeah.

Yeah. Not actually anything to do with the weather pattern in Chicago. Did you know that? No, I didn't. Has it blown your mind? No, but I want to know more. Okay. It's blowing more wind.

Yeah, it was... Chicago's nickname was coined by Journalists who were referring to the fact That the residents were full of hot air Oh really? That's where the Windy City comes from Mine's still not blown Interesting though, I found it interesting Yet to get the Dyson out and have to vacuum up

Your brain matter Peanuts aren't actually nuts, technically speaking. Really? Yeah, well, a nut is only a nut if it's a hard-shelled dried fruit or seed. No, I mean, these are... I mean, yeah, they shouldn't probably say call them peanuts, but it's, yeah. Here's one. Armadillos.

Do you know armadillos? The animal? The animal with the shell? Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you realise those shells are bulletproof? No. Again, no. These are very, I don't feel like I'm impressing you with these.

No, I think it's good. They're good, though. I'm interested. The longest, no, no. Oh, no. Oh, this, yeah, okay. I love this. You're like, oh, no. Okay, here's what, okay. I love this. You're like, oh.

Okay, here's what, I'll end on this. Octopus, octopuses or octopi? I don't know what the plural of octopus is. Octopi, yeah. Octopussies? Yeah, that could work, yeah. Okay. They lay 56,000 eggs at one time.

Wow. Now that's impressive. That's a good, wow. Okay, that's good. That's a good one to end on. End on that one. Okay. Now that's impressive. Wow. Okay, that's good. That's a good one to end on. End on that one. Okay, don't go anymore. No, that's a good one. No end to end.

Here's the podcast, which includes the very funny Reece Darby and my revenge on Jono for reception reception. Have a listen. Not a morning person? Sadly, neither of these two. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, every Thursday for probably the past nine or ten weeks, Jono, you've played a game called Reception, Reception.

You've rung a random reception somewhere around New Zealand and you've left me an embarrassing message. I head out of the room and then I come back in and we ring that number back and we'll see if the receptionist will pass on that embarrassing message to me, even though I don't work for them. And most of the time they do.

Amazing receptionists around the country. It's been nine weeks of torture and torment for you. I've committed crimes upon your name from Kaitaia to Bluff right throughout the country. I mean, you can't travel anywhere without people looking sideways at you now. Here's some examples of what Jono's done. He's embarrassed me

saying he's from Video Easy, I think, with some embarrassing video titles. Just Jonathan calling from Video Easy. I just had a message that I was going to leave for Ben. So he's just got some late fees on grinding Nemo.

Who is this? And also he's two weeks late on ET, the extra testicle. And there's one more. He rented out shaving Ryan's privates. Okay. So that was one example. Another example, when you pretended to be my stepdad

and said I was doing some dreadful things at home. Can you please write down that me and Jenny want him out of the house? He still lives at home. Have you ever seen a fully developed man have to be changed by his mother? Do you know what happened the other day, Sheree? I don't know if I want to know.

I walked into the bedroom. He was intertwined with the vacuum cleaner. So these are embarrassing messages you've left up and down the country, as you said. And behind the scenes of the radio show, in all honesty, you're feeling a little bit bad about it. You're like, look, it looks like I'm picking on you. You need to do one.

It's a bad look. We're only new to this hits audience. You know, this is doing damaging things to my brand. I'm only doing this from a selfish point of view. See, every week you're like, you do one. You do one this week. I'm like, no, I'm feeling bad. I'm feeling bad.

For the last four weeks, I've gone, you do one on me. You do one. So this week I'm like, okay, I'll do one. I'm feeling bad. For the last four weeks, I've gone, you do one on me. You do one. So this week, I'm like, okay, I'll do one. I want you to extract revenge on me. I want to feel sad and embarrassed in my sad and embarrassed body parts. Okay. Those are my nicknames for them. Okay.

Well, you're going to have to leave the studio right now. Okay. You know how this works. Go hard. Don't hold back. All right. He's feeling bad about this. Go to the soundproof booth.

All right. He's going to the soundproof booth. And I'm going to make a call to a random receptionist somewhere in New Zealand. Tracy speaking. Oh, hi, Tracy. How's it going? Good. Hey, I just want to leave a message for Jono, if I could, please.

Who? Jono. He doesn't actually work for you, but it's Ben calling. I just wanted to leave a message for Jono. I was wondering if you could pass on that message. And Jono will be, what, coming in? He's just going to give you a call shortly, and I just wanted to pass on the message. So, Ben. Yep. Ben wants to leave a message for Jono. For Jono. If you just hold there one second, just one second. Have we put her on hold?

Yeah, she's got... I don't even want to say this on the radio. I feel like I'm going to tell it to her off the radio. It's that bad. Off air. It's that bad. I'm going to play while this Lady Gaga song's on. I'm going to tell Tracy the message,

but will she tell it to Jono on the radio next? I've just done it. I've just left a message with Tracy. I did it off air, Producer Juliet, because it was quite full on. I'm worried I've gone a little too hard on the radio next. I've just done it. I've just left a message with Tracy. I did it off air, Producer Juliet, because it was quite full on. I might have gone a little too hard on the message.

I feel like it's a message that you want her to deliver rather than you saying it. I'm not sure she's going to pass it on to Jono when he calls

in just a minute. But it's time to bring Jono back in from the soundproof booth. Come back in here. Hi. Here he comes. Here he comes back into the studio. How are we? Okay, I see what's

happening here. Yeah, did I say you were ready for this? Some reception revenge. That's right. A dish served best through a receptionist and a message. Yes, now I want to say, bearing in mind, as you just heard before, you heard some examples of some of the things you've done to me over the past few months. Here's some more examples, just so you know

what we're playing with, some of the levels that you've taken this to. the past few months. Here's some more examples, just so you know what we're playing with, some of the levels that you've taken this to. So I'm just clarifying some copy or some wording he wanted in the classified ad. Yeah, I'm sure. So the first part of the message is, Hi, my name is Benjamin Boyce. I want to wish my mother a very happy birthday.

Mum, thank you so much for breastfeeding me until the age of 15. Also, how you never panicked when my irritable bowel and weak bladder were not cooperating. I don't know if you're aware, but Ben Boyce's, you know how those intimate videos of celebrities get out on the internet? Mm-hmm. Well, one of him emerged, and it was rather... Oh, really? Yeah, the sad thing was, Karen, though, he was the only one actually starring in the erotic video. It was quite bleak.

Okay, so... Wonderful memories. Wonderful. They live on in my heart forever, and the audience's heart. We'll remember those for many years. Because I was feeling quite... We'll play those at your funeral.

Thank you. Feeling quite bad about, you know, doing this, and you're like, no, don't. Go hard, you know? You'd be doing it for me. You'd be feeling a little bad about it, so, you know? Yeah, well, yeah. I feel like this is... Everyone was starting to turn on me yeah uh the schoolyard is

says finally uh the the bully is this pranky rain has ended yeah right so you've given me free rain to go you have you have free right okay all right i'm just thinking i like yeah i've been a bit nervous about doing this what are you setting up what are you saying all right let's make it cool you gotta call tracy uh tracy's gonna answer the phone, and Tracy will pass on the message, hopefully, to you. Hopefully. I don't know. Where does Tracy work?

Tracy speaking. Hello, Tracy. Hi. How are you? I'm good. Hey, listen, is Jonathan here? Jonathan or Jono? Jono.

Jono, yes. Jono, hi. How are you? I was told I had a message I had to retrieve off you, Tracey. Yes, yes, you do. And it's from Ben. And Ben has told me to tell you that you're an amazing person and he treasures your friendship

and feels lucky to work with you every day. You're a tremendous announcer, and Ben respects you 100%. And on a scale of 1 to 10, what is he? On a scale of 1 to 10, you are an 11. He's an 11. Yeah. That is a very special working relationship.

He's a special guy, Tracy. Yeah, I can't actually say I could say that to many people yet. Oh, no, well, that's what I like to say to my friend, John. No, no, no. Tracy, you's what I like to say to my friend Jono. No, no, no. Tracy, you know what he's done here. What? I just want to pass on the message to my friend Jono. No, he's...

No, no. This is not how it works, Tracy. I hope you're hugging him right now. Yeah, he's not. No, he's angry. Do not hug me. After all the nice stuff I said about you. No, it's definitely worth a hug.

He does not mean it tracy any other day of the week he calls me bald so they've got bad genuine i was i was really genuine tracy was that about the love yeah he's only doing it because he's wanting to be made me to look like a worse person i just wanted to share my love and friendship. I said that to Tracy. And you did. Thank you, Tracy. 100%. Beautiful words. He means none of it, though, Tracy. Beautiful words.

No, no, I think he did. Beautiful words. I felt the emotion in his voice. Yeah, I did. I was almost in tears when I read that message. I couldn't do it on radio. It's still a tremble. I had to do it during a song.

I don't accept this. Like Trump with the upcoming election, I don't accept these results. Okay? I'll have none of it. Tracy, I don't know how you got sucked into this.

Are you even real? I am. There she is. You've got a real mouth? Yeah. What? A real mouth. She's got a real mouth.

I'm going to make it awkward now. Hey, Tracy, thank you so much for passing on that message. Not a problem. Have a good day. You hold the line. We want to send you out

something, all right? All right, eh? No, it's a flicker out of prize. Oh, the good guy. Look at him. Says lovely stuff about the guy who picked him for none. Reception, reception. What a lovely moment. And a flicker

out of prize. Like starting your day without your morning coffee. It's Jono and Ben on my heads. Let's just see on the TV screen, Captain Sir Tom Moore, the guy, the lovely elderly gentleman in the UK. Remember he was walking around with his stroller, earning money, and millions and millions, didn't he? He just walked around

his property, right? Yeah, and he got knighted. He's just signed a movie deal. Not a movie deal of him just walking around doing very painfully slow lapses. Well, look, if he knew James Bond maybe he's going to do James Bond. What movie deal has he signed? Military hero, maybe? Geez, they'd be wanting to film that movie

pretty quickly, wouldn't they? Because he's slow walking. That's right. That's, yeah, exactly. That's right. Yeah. That's exactly what I meant. Now, I've got a lovely neighbour. You know, neighbours, everybody needs good neighbours.

That's right, yeah. A little care and understanding. But no, my neighbour, he keeps, and it's very generous, it's such a wonderful gesture, he keeps giving me cakes. They've got a lovely, they've got a lime tree in their backyard, and he's like, oh oh here's a lime cake and it's delicious like I nail it

once I start a cake I eat the whole cake so you this is in your eating time because we've talked about how you don't eat during the day so at night time you treat yourself to a cake

yeah I was mowing the lawns the other day he's like here have a cake I was like oh thank you I just ate cake while I was mowing a lawn because one day when we used to do the drive show

didn't you eat a whole cheesecake on the way home? Yeah. You don't need to cheesecake shame me, mate. You bought it from the cheesecake shop. I went to the cheesecake shop, cakes and desserts from the cheesecake shop. Highly under, you don't think about that as a cake proprietor,

but jeez, they've got some great cakes there. They haven't paid for this either. I'll bill them for that. You've got to say hashtag ad now. Hashtag ad. They're not paying you. But no, yeah, I did. I bought a cheesecake.

It was meant for dessert, but I ate it on the way home on the southern motorway. Eating cake and driving. What a skill. What a skill. And it wasn't even cut in pieces as well. I just had to eat chunks of it with my hand. You're questioning your life. Yeah, I've got a chicken cake history.

But yes, you know, my lovely neighbour, he keeps giving us cakes, so many cakes. And I've just got like, I've got nothing to give him back. I've got no skills to make anything. Oh, I see. You kind of do feel like you need to return the favour. Oh, well, I feel obliged to. All I could do now is I could come and obnoxiously talk at him. Like do a radio show at his lounge or something. To a music store.

Oh, yeah, that's great. No, you can laugh there, mate. Laugh loud. But I've got nothing. Do you have like a go-to thing that you give the neighbours? No. Oh, yeah, that's great. No, you've got to laugh there, mate. Laugh loud. But I've got nothing. Do you have like a go-to thing that you give the neighbours? No. No. No, nothing at all.

Remember your neighbour came over and tried to give you something? Remember? What's that? Amanda went over and said, oh, that smells nice. And you shut the door in their face. Oh, yes. I didn't realise new neighbours across the road. That's right.

And yeah, they left their lights on. And Amanda's like, oh, hey, I'm from across the road. Yeah, your lights are on. And Amanda had to go out. She was going out. So these people just turned out later because Amanda said, oh, hey, I'm from across the road. Yeah, your lights are on. And Amanda had to go out. She was going out. So these people just turned out later because Amanda said, oh, your meal smells beautiful. And they thought, lovely.

They brought it over in some containers for her. But I didn't realise. And I thought it was Uber Eats that we hadn't ordered. And they're like, not ours. Boom. Shut the door. Clean in their face. Get out of here, you loser.

We haven't ordered anything tonight. But, yeah, they were all very confused. They left it on the doorstep. Oh, my goodness. With a lovely note saying, this is from your new neighbours. Thanks for shutting the door in our place. We're not an Uber Eats driver. Not everyone bringing food over is an Uber Eats driver.

Wrong house, idiot. Bang. Oh, wasn't that brutal? Start your day the wrong way. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, I have caused some embarrassment unintentionally for my friend's family. And we didn't mean to do this, but a little incident happened. Over the weekend, my mate came over with his daughter,

and they were hanging out with our kids and then playing around. And his daughter's a little bit younger than ours. And so my girls were like, oh, would you like some of the, you know, any of the toys that we don't play with anymore because we've got a little bit older. And so they went through, grabbed some stuff. And there was also in there, there was like a lipstick and an eyeliner as well. And I was like, great, get this out of the house.

Our girls still play with that. But I'm like, if you want them, you take that. You take that. Get it away. Hold on. As toys, as toddler toys, you gave toddlers lipstick and eyeliner? No, not toddler. It looked like seven or eight years old.

But it still seems very risky. Yeah, well, someone had given it to us. We were like, you know, you play with it. It's makeup sort of, you know, like when you're dressing up and stuff like that. But they were like, Dad, can I take it? And I was like, yeah, sure, take it. So my friend ended up taking home with his daughter the toys and the lipstick and the eyeliner. And when he got home, his wife was asleep.

She was just having a bit of a nap, a Sunday afternoon nap. And he didn't realise that his daughter thought, oh, mummy loves make-up. I'll give mummy a bit of a make-up job. So she put some lipstick on, a bit of eyeliner, and all that while she slept. No one knew that the daughter had done this. And the mum woke up and had to run some errands

and so walked up the road. Looking like a drunk clown had applied make-up to her. And hadn't looked in the mirror. And so just walked straight from the house up the road said she went to about three different shops, she picked up some takeaways, she picked up some milk, she went somewhere else. And not at one stage did anyone go, oh

your make-up's quite... Was there a natural complexion or was it smeared? No, it was like smeared. I mean, this is like... I may be like, oh, this lady hasn't been to sleep from last night. It's like a seven-year-old looking like a clown that had, you know... Had drooled.

Yeah. Like the lipstick's off to the side, the eyeliner's down a little bit as well, but she'd been wandering around for a good 45 minutes. Makeup's a... Look, how much do you spend on makeup, Producer Juliet?

Oh, it's so expensive. If you want foundation, which is like what you put all over your face, basically, that can range from like at least 7070 if you want a good quality one. Yeah, and how much extra time does it add to your day? So what are you prepping each morning? So I personally don't wear much makeup to work every day,

but if I would be, I'd probably have to allocate about half an hour, 20 minutes. It seems very unfair. Oh, it's so annoying. We just walk out. I'm just dropping. The naked mole rat just walks out of the shower dripping wet, puts some clothes on, doesn't even dry himself, and I can start the day.

See, that's why sometimes I'm like, God, it would be good to be a man because you don't have to worry about all that admin of having to look good. Although the times that we did when we had TV, Dana, who was a wonderful makeup person there, I always found her like plucking my old man eyebrows. Oh, you should be going, oh, you've got another long one. Another long one. She'd like pluck it out.

My dad makes me pluck his eyebrows. He lies on the couch. He's like, Juliet, eyebrow time. I'm like, okay. Yeah, but he's your dad. Yeah, true. He's like, I'm sorry, but I've already got old man eyebrows. Like Ben, Ben's five metres away from me right now.

He could tug on my eyebrows. He could do it like a high wire trick. I thought you were going them out so you could comb them back over your bald head. I thought, oh, maybe it's a stylistic thing. He's waiting. It's a long game, but hey. Just four eyebrow hairs.

Slicked back, I gel them back. That would add some prep time to my morning, like you, Juliet. After eight o'clock on the show this morning, I get my revenge. Your reception, reception. Jono, you've given me permission to go as hard as I want. Free reign. Go ham.

I've got an idea, but I've told it to you, Producer Juliet, and I think it's probably too far. Yeah, I'd be worried, Jono, to be honest. Oh, really? I don't know if I want to say this on the radio. It's not on a personal level, is it? Oh. Hey, I deserve it.

I deserve it. You're like Liam Neeson extracting revenge for my reckless comical actions. So, hey, go hard. Not too hard, though, but you know my boundaries. We'll have a conversation during the ads. His eyebrows are raised. I can see that here. We're here sticking out.

Wake up full of shame. Wake up with these guys. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Now, there's a photo going around the internet that's causing a bit of frustration to some people. And others are saying it's a bit of a shopping hack. So what this person does when they come home from the supermarket and instead of unloading the food from the bags,

puts the bags straight in the ones in the fridge that need to go in the fridge and the others straight in the ones in the fridge that need to go in the fridge and the other straight into the pantry. Oh, that is smart. I mean, how, if we added up all the minutes of our lives we spent packing, shopping, unpacking, shopping, washing, fruit, putting stuff. Imagine it.

It would be days on end. Just biff it in the fridge. I love that. Just see what works. Some people are getting really, really I mean it's the internet Everyone gets annoyed About everything Let's be honest

Has there been backlash Of this? Oh yeah there's backlash People infuriated Shocked That's what it says Shocked Infuriated by this

But I thought If it works for you It works for you Anything to cut down Supermarket shopping time I mean you've probably Come off the back Of an hour

Hour and a half Of traipsing through the aisles Parking and all that sort of stuff. Get home, biff it in, and that's the way to do it. Shopping hacks is what we want to know this morning. Oh, 800 the hits. Have you got a shopping hack? It doesn't have to be for the supermarket.

It could be any shops. 4487 on the text. When those annoying reusable bags came in, I was a big campaigner for plastic bags, producer Juliet. Of course you were. Yeah, I was probably the only New Zealand broadcaster saying, why are we getting rid of plastic bags? They've got huge uses. Mainly putting them in the ocean.

They're good little things to float around the ocean, fun things to look at, aren't they? The sea creatures to play with. Yeah, exactly. Dolphins have got no toys in the oceans. We kindly deposit plastic bags for them to play with. Use as fun hats. Fun little hats.

But yeah, when they came into play, I was like, oh, I can't be bothered getting a reusable bag. So I would just take the baskets out of Countdown. Yeah, one in the back of your car. I was like, you've got to take that back. I had like three or four baskets. Really? You took the baskets?

And it became very problematic, apparently, for the supermarket chains. Yes. Really? You took the baskets? And it became very problematic, apparently, for the supermarket chains. Yes. That people were just taking baskets in, like, revolt that they were trying to save the environment.

So that's Jono's shopping hack. What's yours? We're going to go to Blen and we're going to welcome Tony to New Zealand's breakfast. How are you, T-Dog? How you going, man? Yeah, really well, thank you.

Your shopping hack? So every time I go to pack and save, when just after you put all your groceries on the checkout, you run over, grab a big box, chuck it in your trolley, so they pack, they boys put the groceries

into the trolley, so they end up packing your groceries and you just walk straight out. Oh, because of course they're not meant to pack your groceries, are they? And then you have mind-effed pack and save into packing and saving. It works every time because I've still got to put it in your trolley.

The stick man would not be happy with that little flaw in his plan. Thank you very much, Tony. Appreciate that. Leisha, welcome. You're on the air. What's your shopping hack, Leisha? Yeah, I've got... I'm a working mum. I've got two girls under the age of six. I don't

enjoy shopping whatsoever, so my hack is simply to send husband. Great hack. And that's why you marry them, isn't it? Just so you can send them to the supermarket. I don't even love this person, but he can go to the supermarket for me. He's tall, beautiful, and shops like a champion.

Tall, beautiful, and shops like a champion. That was his Tinder profile. There you go. That's what attracted her to him in the first place. That was his Tinder profile. There you go. That's what attracted her to him in the first place. That's awesome. Really appreciate it. Thank you so much for your calls. Want more Jono and Ben?

You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Now, we've put together a bit of a plan. We wanted to give away some money, and we're going down to Lake Taupo, and we want to win the hole-in-one challenge down there where you can win $10,000. And then we want to give that away.

So give that away to someone listening right now. And Boss Todd has guaranteed that if we don't get one of our 1,000 shots in, he's still going to give us $10,000 to give away. So you, if you get one of our golf balls, could have a one-in-1,000 chance of winning $10,000. That's some pretty good odds. That's pretty good odds, right? There winning $10,000. That's pretty good odds. That's pretty good odds, right? There's better odds out there.

Those are pretty good odds. Yeah, there's better odds. I mean, like 1 in 2 chances. Oh, yeah, but I wouldn't say no one's offering you those odds. No one's. No one's. No, the radio shows out there going you've got a 1 in 2 chance. No.

On radio right now, we're giving the best odds at winning $10,000. So we'll go to the phones right now because this is our first giveaway. This is historic. In a historic moment, we're going to have three callers on. Each of them are going to have the opportunity to pitch why they should get the chance to pick the first numbered ball. And that will be, I guess, taking into account when they feel we'll be in good form with our swing.

When we'll be in that sweet spot, you know, that four to six beer, you know, when you're playing pool, you've had a couple of drinks and you're in that sweet spot. They have the opportunity to do this right now. So we're looking good but not too tired because I imagine we're going to hit 500 balls each. We're going to get quite tired by the end of it. I know why.

I know why, Ben. What? I was meant to say, I know what I'm going to do now. I'm going to go to Sharon. You didn't. I know. I said, I know why, which made no sense. Sharon, I'm going to pin this one on you, okay?

Okay, no problem. You take the hit on this one. Sharon, this is your fault. Hey, good to have you on New Zealand's Breakfast, matey. How are you? Thank you. I'm fine. How are you?

Yeah, good. You get to pitch why you think you deserve to have the first pick. Okay, well, I'd love number four because it's my eldest son's favourite number and he's actually coming out of quarantine today after coming back with his partner from Australia to be back in New Zealand. So I really think that number four would be

a lucky number for us. That's an emotional backstory as well from Sharon. Love it. Tugging on heartstrings. Sons, isolation, daughters, everything. Had it all. Had it all. Thank you very much. Hold there.

We'll go to Belinda. You're in Auckland. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast, Belinda. What's your pitch? I'd like number 13. I recently found out I've got a hole in the heart, and it's only one hole, but they're going to repair it soon, but I'd like to go for 13 because it's the day I got married on in 2013. And we

are trying to aim a golf ball into a hole. Yeah. Like a hole in your heart. Oh, yeah. Okay, yes. Not bad, not bad. And Martin is on 0800 The Hits. Welcome, Martin. Your pitch for a golf ball. Good morning, guys. Well,

I've been married to my wife for four years now, so four's already gone, obviously. Well, I've been married to my wife for four years now. So four's already gone, obviously. Well, it hasn't technically gone. It hasn't technically gone, true, true. But I haven't had a honeymoon before yet. We haven't been able to because we've been busy looking after the kids I got custody of just before we got married. So I'd actually like hole number one because I'm confident you guys are getting that hole in one. In one? In one. Wow, that is

blind confidence on your behalf, Martin. Okay, so we have Sharon, there's an isolation story, a hole in the heart story, we've got a honeymoon story. I mean, Ben Boyce, what are you going to pick? John, I'm going to annoy you. I'm going to give them all the numbers they want. Oh, God, he's an arse.

I knew he was going to do it. What was the point of this? We were going to pick one, but I'm like, annoy you. I'm going to give them all the numbers they want. Oh, God, he's an ass. I knew he was going to do it. What was the point of this? We can't. What was the point of this? We were going to pick one, but I'm like, it's too hard. After hearing all those stories, they all deserve those numbers. Can we put them all on, Juliet? Okay.

Oh, my God. What do you want to do? Do you want to be? Okay, no, I'll throw it back to you. That's what I want to do. What do you want to do? I'm going to pick Sharon. Here we go.

Well done, Sharon. You win. The other two don't. No, they don't. No, no. Belinda, you can have 13. Martin, you can have number one, all right? but Sharon here we go well done Sharon you win the other two don't no they don't no no that's how the game works Martin you can have number one alright

thank you very much everyone wins here on the hits with Ben and Jono everyone's a winner I'm going to get my name first for a change what was the point

of the last three minutes I don't know I don't know why did we create a format I don't know I don't know but here we are I just couldn't I couldn't pick one out of we create a format? I don't know. I don't know. But here we are.

I just couldn't pick one out of that. Lou in calories and Lou in laughs. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Very exciting. We're giving away 10 grand. For Jono and Ben's 10K tee-off. In the next couple of weeks, we're going to Lake Taupo and we're going to try, Jono and I, we're going to try and win $10,000 with the world

famous Hole-in-One Challenge they have there on the lake. If we hit the ball into the hole and win $10,000, we're going to give it away to a listener. But then Todd, Boss Todd, is guaranteed that we'll give away $10,000 regardless when we come back to the studio on the next show. He's made some

wild promises to the Mexican cartel. He's got some money off them, and we'll have to pay that back at a later date. We'll sort that out at the back end. The main thing is 10 grand is going to be given away. We've got 1,000 chances to get the ball in, though, into the pontoon which sits on Lake Taupo, and we're going to give everyone a chance,

everyone listening a chance to have a ball designated to them. 0800 THE HITS is our phone number if you want one of the balls right now and we'll let you pick which number you want as far as the golf balls go because we've only given away three or four so far. And I've got my confidence, I don't know why, but it's growing. We've spoken to two people in two days

who have had holes in ones. We just spoke to Shezza in Whangarei who got two hole-in-ones in one round of golf. We only need one of those holes-in-one. Yeah. Just one of Sheza's. You're right. Just a little bit of luck.

Anyone can do it, right? We'll go to Tretha in Tauranga. Welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Tretha, how are you? Good morning. Good, thank you. Lovely to have you on. Thank you.

We're going to give you a ball. Yay. What number? Number six, please. Number six. If that's still available. If it's still available. We'll give you number six. Why did you like number six, please. Number six, if that's still available. If it's still available. We'll give you number six.

Why'd you go number six? I am mum to three twin boys, so I've got six boys. They call me the Kiwi Supermum, and I just don't have the bank funds to go with raising these six boys. Six boys? It's a drag out for me. You've got three lots of twins. I do.

They're 20, 12 and 10, so I've still got a few more years with the young ones. Wow. You should be on like a novelty show they play on TVNZ2 on a Wednesday night called The Mum with Three Sets of Twins. Yeah. That's incredible. That'd be pretty rad.

What are the chances of that? Yeah. The odds are one in 500,000. Oh's incredible. That'd be pretty rad. And what are the chances of that? The odds are one in 500,000. Oh, wow. Well, we're giving you better odds, one in 1,000 of winning 10 grand, all right? So, hey, everybody. I hope the luck is on my side. That is incredible.

Man, as I keep saying, the hits audience, the most fertile in New Zealand. That's the most fertile. Wow. Like starting your day with Panda Eyes. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Spy. Launch into mess-free Mexican with the new Old El Paso tortilla pocket.

Tell you what, Producer Juliet, she's the most committed gossip monger in the game. Sometimes she just makes up complete lies around the office so she's got something to gossip about. Yeah, that's pretty accurate. Yesterday she was spreading filth about you being boys. Oh, really? Was she? Did you hear he doesn't double-side print? He's only a single-side printer.

Yeah, that's the gossip I'm spreading about you, Ben. I'll remember. Okay, okay. So Elton John fans, if you had tickets to his show that got postponed, they have set a new date for Friday the 27th and Saturday the 28th of January. Oh, I had the dates down, but I didn't have the year 28th of January and 20, oh I had the dates down but I didn't have the year written down. It's 2029 I think. 2023 I think. 2023, okay. We'll all be

dead by then anyway so it's not going to matter. 2023, so this is still obviously a wee while away for Alton to come back. I feel sorry for Alton because this was his farewell last tour ever and he's like, I just want to get this out of the way and then now this has all happened and he's like, I just want to get this out of the way. And then now this has all happened. And he's like, God, I may as well have just gone on another tour.

It was like all the politicians, they did all their goodbyes in Parliament, then had to come back, remember? Yeah. It was like the last day of school, then you find out the last day of school is dragging on for another term. I get that. I get that. But Lauren Mabbitt, who's reading news on the show this morning,

just did a hilarious post. Yeah, she posted on Facebook. The person I was taking to Elton John has changed three times and includes two exes. Now the show's been delayed till 2023, and this is turning into a real ride. How many different people is she going to invite between now and 2023? She's still going to be friends with the person.

That's right. Tell you what, if you date Lauren Mabbitt, you're in for an Elton John concert. If you can stick it out till 2023. She's still going to be friends with the person. That's right. Tell you what, if you date Lauren Mabbitt, you're in for an Elton John concert. If you can stick it out until 2023. Free ticket to Elton John. And Tom Cruise, he is officially going to space to film his next movie. They've locked in the date for October 2021.

He actually is going to space. Yeah, yeah. So it's going to be the first ever movie filmed at the International Space Station, which is bloody cool. I've always wanted to go to space. Now, Tom's been doing movies for a long time. Has he heard of a green screen? And where's a workshop? He likes doing

his own stunts, doesn't he? So yeah, you might be right. Yeah, I know, but then what he's not Tom might be like, yeah, cool, I want to go to space but then do the 900 other people who have to take the cameras and the sound equipment want to go to space. But then do the 900 other people who have to take the cameras and the sound equipment want to go to space? Do they want to say goodbye to their families for nine months? I feel like they're probably going to be up there for a really long time.

Yeah, they'll be back just in time for Elton John, I think. Yeah. By the time they go up there and come back. There will probably be so many bloody problems that they'll have to deal with. Who's going to turn the International Space Centre into a Scientology chair? As close as the Scientology up there, maybe. Simone, that's the way it wants to go.

It's a good play from Cruise. True, true. I'm jealous. I've always wanted to go to space. So if there are any astronauts listening, please slide into my DMs. Well, you get quite high on the weekends, so you're close to space anyway, Juju. Jesus. And on that note, I'm going to wrap up Spy.

She doesn't. That was just a cheap gag from me. I don't know. We're still waiting for your drug test, aren't we? We apologise in advance. It's Jodo and Ben on the hits. We're going to Lake Topor. We're going to try and hit 1,000 golf balls to the hole in one on the lake. If we win it, it's

10 grand we want to give away to you. And Boss Todd has come through with a guaranteed, a golf guarantee of 10 grand if we miss all 1,000 he's still going to give away 10 grand. And we're going to give away more balls, more golf balls just after 8 o'clock and each ball

will represent one of you, if that ball goes in you win the cash but regardless as Benjamin Ross-Boyce just said, someone's going to walk away with $10,000 and a smile on their dial, apart from Boss Todd, who's going to be the centre of an internal investigation as to where those funds have gone. But we're joined right now by a lady from Whangarei, Cheryl or Shezza. How are you?

I'm good, thank you. Do you mind a Shezza? No, I don't mind. Good you had to think about it for a little while. I feel like maybe you do. Thank you for entertaining Shezza. Now Cheryl, you've got Shezza.

You've got not only one but two hole-in-ones in your golfing career. On that one round, yes. On the same round? On the same round, yes, in my racket, yeah. Shut the front door, Shezza. Wow, that's amazing.

Now, do you say holes-in-ones or hole-in-ones? Or holes-in-one? Two hole-in-ones. I have one on number five and one on number two. Wow. So this must be like the greatest day ever for someone playing golf. Well, it was a surprise. Yeah.

What did you say? Let's do a reenactment. Pulled out the eight iron and thought, oh, I've got to get up over that bunker and water. So go for the back. Yeah. But I didn't quite make the back. I hit the front, and it just popped straight in the hole, and I didn't notice.

The other girls were jumping up and down. I said, you've got a hole in one. So the girls are jumping up and down. Cheryl's, they're going, Cheryl, Cheryl. Or they're going, Shezza, Shezza. You've got a hole in one. And what is Shezza saying? What are you saying back?

What are the first words out of your mouth? Are you sure? Are you sure? Are you sure? And they're like, we're sure. And then what did you say? Oh, we'll wait till we get up there and have a look. Yeah, she wanted to confirm it. Cheryl, just trust us.

We've seen it go in. Yeah, like. And then what did you say? I got up there and I was sort of taken back a bit. I was quite surprised. You would be. And then a couple of holes later, you do the same thing all over again. Then we

got round to the last hole, which was number two, and I said to the girls, oh, well, I've just got to get on the green here, because I don't get any shots for this one. So I pulled the eight iron out and hit it, it hit the front, and they said, oh, it's gone in the hole again. I said, no, I think you can't quite see. And

they said, well, come on, we'll go and have quite see. And they said, well, come on, we'll go and have a look. And I said, well, hey, hang on a minute. You've got to hit two first. Oh, they were getting too excited, Jenna. You're still playing golf. Don't forget you're still playing. And they were yelling and that and wanted to go and have a look. But yes, it was in the hole. Oh, were they jumping up and down for this one or were they just walking normally? No, they were jumping up and down as well.

I'd be like, I can't play with you anymore, Cheryl. I've got to go home. You're too good. That's what I'd be thinking. No, they went around the course like wildfire.

Yeah, I can imagine. I bet everyone's like, Cheryl, go to two holes. And what happened when you got back to the clubhouse? Do you have to shout? We heard that maybe

you had to shout around the drinks. Is that right? No, you don't. Oh, that's good. What's the key? What's the secret? Because we're trying to win the one at Lake Taupo.

We want to give away $10,000 if we get it. Any tips for us? I have no idea. Okay, great. Just don't think about it. Just go. That's some wonderful advice there from Cheryl. I have no idea. We don't think about a lot of the things we do. No, that's some great advice, Cheryl.

I imagine this would be a world first. Two hole-in-one in one round of golf. I have no idea if it is or not. Cheryl, thank you so much for sharing that amazing story with us and the listeners. You're most welcome and good luck with your hole-in-one. Sounds like we need you down there, Cheryl, knocking it in for us.

No, I'll probably put you off. Good on you, Cheryl. You look after yourself. You too. Thank you very much. Making poor life decisions every morning. It's Jodo and Ben on the hits. There's a brand new animated family movie out next week

just in time for school holidays called 100% Wolf and it features our own Rhys Darby as one of the all-star cast of voices and he joins us right now. How's it going, Rhys? Yeah, not bad, not bad. Just ticking away in the old isolation hotel. Oh, are you in isolation at the moment? No, I am.

I'm in the Christchurch isolation chamber here at the airport. Oh, well, there we go. How much longer have you got to go, Rhys? I've got like another eight days. Eight days of staring at these airplanes, yeah. Are you just by yourself? Yes. Oh, wow.

It's isolation. I can imagine you being you. He's like, that's isolation. That's how it works, Jono. I imagine you being you, you're probably making the plane noises as the planes land just to fill in time. That's a funny idea, actually. Maybe I should do that. I wrote a funny idea actually. Maybe I should be.

I wrote a poem this morning about the planes. That's about all I've done. Can we hear the poem? Let's have a look and see if I can find it. Oh, here it is. You there? Yeah, we're good. Sometimes I tell people I'm going to read them a poem

and they quickly head off. You know, we're still here. Got to go, mate. Love your work. I tell people I'm going to read them a poem, they quickly head off. You know, we're still here. We're still here. Got to go, mate. Love your work. Bruce Darby, great catching up. No, love to hear the pubs. All right, here it is.

The planes are on the tarmac. Such well-behaved big brutes. They know not why they sit and wait, for we're not in cahoots. The gentle giants look at me, their wings beginning to droop. Even the Air Force mothership is devoid of any troops. So when, they say, can we fly away

and take you folks abroad once the killer COVID has hunted down and sliced to death with my sword? Oh, that is really good. And that's the poetry of a man who's been locked up in isolation for a week and a half. Rhys Darby. Well, there you go.

That's how I'm feeling anyway. We're very excited. There's an animated family movie. Rhys Darby, you're one of the voices. It's called 100% Wolf. Looks very cool. And it's awesome that New Zealand gets to see it in cinemas. Yeah, this one's really great.

It's quite an original story. So we all know about werewolves, but what if they were good? We've never thought about that, Rex. Yeah, I play a wacky sort of oddball misunderstood genius, as usual. You're Crip, the ice cream vendor slash werewolf hunter. Can you give us a sneak peek what your voice sounds like, your voicing talents for the movie? Oh, he's

quite the voice, this guy. So, you can imagine me in my high register when things aren't going well, like, for example, here's a quick moment for you. What? I can't believe it. I didn't know that they were like that.

What? No. That kind of thing. That's all right. That sounds like when you're having a discussion with your partner and you've done something wrong, but you're pretending you haven't done anything wrong. That's exactly it.

What? No, no, no, not me. I'm good at that one. Voicing must be one of the coolest things to do as an actor because surely you can turn up to work in your pyjamas with a coffee stain on your t-shirt, you know, that sort of thing? Oh, I love it. Yeah, absolutely. It harks back to the old radio plays, the idea that you can create these characters in your head and people use their imagination. Yeah, but of course, these days, you know, they animate it and you have to see what you see. Rhys Darby with us, because he's a

fantastic cast in this movie, Rhys. Are you all in the same room when you're voicing the film? No, unfortunately not, and less so these days, of course, with all the restrictions and things. And the other thing is when you try and get big names, you know, they're usually busy, so you just have to sort of fit in with their schedules, and so you'll come down, you know,

you'll do your 10 cents worth and bugger off, and then, you know, it all comes together in the end. Who was the hardest scheduled to negotiate, Rhys, on this project, mate? Oh, look, definitely me. I didn't have anything on at the time, but I did tell them, look, I'm only available on these small windows.

And then they found me in town actually cleaning some small windows. We've got Reece Darby with us. A brand new animated movie. It's called 100% Wolf about werewolves. It's in cinemas October 1st. Looks awesome. Reece, you've got such a distinctive voice. You've voiced many things over the years,

played in lots of Hollywood movies and TV shows. Have you ever been recognised by your voice? Yes, unfortunately, I have. Because these days you can wear the mask and stuff, but as soon as you order a coffee, I'll have the coffee, please! Oh, here we go. Here comes the small window cleaner wanting his coffee. He's gotby back again.

You know, one of my proudest moments as a New Zealander was only two weekends ago, and it involved you, Rhys Darby. My son and I, my son's just, he's turned 10, he's really getting into The Simpsons. And seeing your cameo on The Simpsons, it made me so proud. And it must have been one of those moments in your career I imagine where you're like, wow, I'm doing this now. Yeah, absolutely. It was one of those life affirming moments that I'm still on

the right track. Now, of course, Simpsons have been around for 30 seasons. So I was like, come on, hurry up, hurry up. Here we go. 30 years. It's our time. So finally I managed to nail that one. It was like going on the Letterman show when I went on the David Letterman, like a couple of months before the show finished.

I was like, oh, God, I just sneaked in there. That was another one. Letterman had checked out by then. Was he even turning up and doing the interviews? Not really. I remember him not even looking at me, but I was like, I'm on your show, mate. I've got it.

From New Zealand. He had his back facing to you. Oh, you must have this movie, another great movie with a great cast, as Johnna mentioned. You've been in movies with Jim Carrey, The Rock, Kevin Hart. I mean, you must have so many

sort of pinch yourself moments or does it sort of just seem normal now when these things happen? It's, you know, it does start to seem normal after you've done your first movie with Jim Carrey, that's for sure. I think, where does it go from there? So I'm not too surprised, but what I am always surprised with is that the people are always wonderful.

They're just genuine, but really, we're just doing our jobs. That's a very humble response there. Yeah, Re Starby, it's always good to catch up with you. October 1st, 100% Wolf, it's in cinemas. All about a proud family of werewolves, and one of them gets turned into a poodle, I understand. Based on a true story, I'm guessing, Rhys? Absolutely, that's right.

Good catching up, and we're very lucky in New Zealand to be able to go see movies like this in cinemas. So go along and see it just in time for the school holidays, October 1st. Take care and quarantine isolation. Thank you very much. Want more Jono and Ben? You can catch up with the boys anytime.

Just search Jono and Ben on Instagram. We've got scrolling through your feed. Just looking up on the TV, you've got Breakfast TV on, you know, you've got your John Campbells, Jenny Clarkson. There's only one John Campbell. They were nice when people say

you're John Campbells. Oh, you've got your John Campbells? I'm going to say it. There was two John Campbells on there, you know. There's only one John Campbell. They always make people say you're John Campbell's. Oh, you've got your John Campbell's? I'm going to say it. There was two John Campbell's on there, you know. They do that all the time. What if I've got two TVs on? You take your Aaron Smith, your Bowden Barrett. There's only one.

There's one Aaron Smith. He's great. There's one by the way. He's great. Anyway, I'm just going to say it just because it irritates you. John Campbell's, your May Clarkson's. Just one of them. Your Petrie's.

They're all up there. They're smiling, having the time, laughing, smiling, having the time of their life. And I turn around to you two. Look, they're sitting there looking dead inside. Pick your game up, guys. Glass houses. Those guys on Breakfast TV probably got up about 3 o'clock, hours and hours before we did. I know.

They're looking great. We need to pick our game up. Sprightly. They look smart. They're looking fashionable shoes. do look great. We need to pick our game up. Sprightly, they look smart. Look at them. They're looking fashionable shoes Matty McLean's got on this morning. Oh, listen, they're doing well. Well done, Breakfast.

Let's not worry about them. Let's concentrate on our show. This is Scrolling Through Your Feed. And the man who has been scrolling through your feed looking at hordes of influencer fit tea commercials and photos of people's breakfasts,

Benjamin Boyce. That's right. Now, Elton John, I remember he came to New Zealand. Start of the year, seems like a lifetime ago. Bought COVID to New Zealand. No, he didn't. I stand by those claims. No, he didn't. What is walking pneumonia? I'd never heard of it before. He leaves,

we all of a sudden have an outbreak. No, he was very sick, but he left and he said he was coming back. Well, Elton John, he's coming back, guys. If you've got tickets, they are still valid. He's coming coming back. Oh, John, he's coming back, guys. If you've got tickets, they are still valid. He's coming back. 2023. Oh, 2023.

So whatever you're doing in three years, pencil that date out. What if I don't like Elton John in three years? Because, you know, my musical tastes do change. Mind you, if I haven't not liked Elton John by now, three years isn't going to make a difference because he's been around for so long. Well, that's true. If I like him now, I'm still going to like him in three years.

It's good to know that that money of mine, because I've got tickets, is just sitting in his account for the next couple of years. Because he needs it. I'm sure he needs it, right? From his point of view, he's probably like, oh, I was meant to be retired by 2023. His tour starts at so long.

It starts in 2022, by the time he gets to New Zealand in 2023. Oh, well, I suppose they need to make plans and obviously give a realistic gap between where we are right now and when potentially the world could be back to some state of normality. It probably is quite realistic for that. So here you go, Al John coming back 2023 to New Zealand. And Judith Crusher-Collins, she had the debate.

Mama Jude. She had a debate the other night against Jacinda Ardern where they just talked all over each other. I'm insulated. No. The answer is no, they're not. No. Thank you for pointing out the world on them.

So how do we get this right? Sorry, Jacinda Ardern. No, sorry, Judith Collins, Jacinda Ardern. I don't know. Is Miss Ardern going to bring in the capital gains tax? No, I'm going to call into the debate an issue last for Dunedin Hospital. That will be a project that will create, that is part of it. Let's be realistic.

She left that and she thinks, she was like, I want it, I want it, clearly want it. Yesterday I saw her marching around on the news

like a pig in mud, just with a smile on her dial. Right. She went to her hometown of Matamata, didn't she? Yeah,

and she met the guy who we spoke to a few weeks ago, Nick, who got a tattoo of Judith Collins on his thigh. Remember that? I think he liked the golden gun. I thought that was great.

The golden one? Yeah, if you're going to have a gun, you might as well have a golden one. So he had, if you hadn't seen it, an image of Crusher Collins, and it said Crusher underneath, and she's like pointing a golden gun in front of the New Zealand flag. Like she was James Bond

or something. It looked quite cool. Very patriotic. And we spoke to Nick, didn't we? You want to get her to sign it, I understand, as well, to get that tattered. Is that going to happen? Yeah, ultimately that would be a pretty cool outcome, but I hear people say they're going to try and make it happen, so yeah,

watch this space, I guess. So they got together yesterday, they met up. I don't know if they got it signed, though, from what I can understand. I think he was wearing long pants, like trousers, and it's on his thigh. So quite an awkward, you know, to show the tattoo in that situation. You can't really roll tight pants up. No. So you kind of have to

drop your pants. That's the best look. Was it all in front of the cameras, too? Yeah, true. Yeah, so nothing like a natural free-flowing conversation in front of the cameras too? Yeah, true. Yeah, so nothing like a natural free-flowing conversation in front of nine news cameras and reporters. And that is scrolling through your feed this morning on this Thursday morning. Wake up and smell them.

Actually, no, please don't smell them. That's odd. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. The A to Z of New Zealand. We are calling every town and city in New Zealand. We call one a day and we're not going to stop except for weekends and holidays and other days we aren't at work.

But the days we're at work we're not going to stop until we've called every town and city in New Zealand. I'm glad you added that disclaimer because a lot of people

are like, we won't sleep, we won't stop. And it's like, well no, you will. You will. You will. You know,

even people are like, we won't stop until we get Trump out of the White House. Well a lot of people have stopped and lived their lives in between,

haven't they? So thank you for that honesty, Ben Boyce. You're welcome. We need more of it in today's world. Today we're heading to Grovetown. It's in Marlborough. 35k's from Blenheimers, Grovetown. And it is home to a school and a pub.

So it's safe to say that there's either quite a lot of drunk educating taking place or drunk learning. We phoned the primary school after the show yesterday, didn't we? Yeah. Grove Town School, Debbie speaking. Hello, Debbie. Hello. Hello, how are you? I'm good.

How's Grove Town? Good. Keeping it clean? Trying. It looks like it's Jono and Ben here from the hits. Oh, is clean? Trying. It looks like it's Jono and Ben here from the hits. Oh, is it? Yeah. We just phone everyone and just make sure they're keeping their place clean.

Yeah. It's our role as low-level radio announcers. Okay. No, we're good here. All good? Oh, good, because we ring every town and city in New Zealand. We're doing one a day, and today's Grovetown's turn. Oh, okay.

Yeah, we've rung you out of the blue. We just thought we'd call you and find out what's happening in Grovetown's turn. Oh, okay. Yeah, we've rung you out of the blue. We just thought we'd call you and find out what's happening in Grovetown. Oh, not a lot. Kids are getting ready to go for a bike ride down to another local school that's just down the road. Oh, now Debbie, tell us about Grovetown because I'm looking

around the place. There doesn't look like there's much there. Hashtag no offence. So we're just a little village just outside of Blenheim and we have the school. We have 77 children here but around us is

vineyards. So you're surrounded by vineyards. So there's a school and what I found interesting about the school is if we go onto your website and it's got contact the school office which is your number. Then it's contact the, which is your number. Yep. Then it's contact the principal, which is your number.

Are you playing multiple roles? It also says if you want to contact the doctor, which is also your number. No. The supermarket, which also suspiciously is the same number. Are you running a multi-faceted... Are you everything in town? You could say that, no.

It's just because we're so small that we only have one number for the school. So how many people would live in Grovetown? Oh. I don't know. There's probably close to 200 houses. 200? Okay. In the area. And would you suggest

a visit to Grovetown or is it a drive on through town? Well, it's not actually a town. It's just a, yeah. No, I wouldn't say that you drive on through, because we've got part of the lagoons down the way. Yeah, don't you drive through without looking at those lagoons? Yeah, you've got the lagoons, yeah. Yeah, and the lagoons are lovely.

You can walk right round them, and there's lots of bird life and lots of native trees and everything in there. I tell you what, the lagoons are lovely, but they're not as lovely as you, Debbie. Thank you. Oh, what a charmer. What a charmer. What a snake oil salesman. I know.

It feels like now we've got you here. You want to invest in our property scheme. How about we develop in Grovetown? Swamplands. We're turning the swamp into something else. Hey, Debbie? Yes? You go and look at that lagoon and you go and have a great day. Okay, thank you. Love talking to you.

Okay, bye. Everyone's so nice, aren't they? We knew that we phoned. I don't know if I'd be as nice if two idiot radio people phoned me up and started barraging questions. Well, you hope you would because you do it to people every day. I know. So you hope you would go, I don't want people in this situation.

I'd like to happen. Yeah. I hope you would. I'm sure you would. You'd say that, but you would. Yeah. I like to give back. You're always talking to people all the time.

Sometimes for way too long. I do. Ben says I talk to people for too long. I keep conversations going for too long. I know. Not necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes he just has to walk away. And I'm like, oh, okay.

No, it's great. But then when you're, we've got to be somewhere, you're like, oh, he's gone in deep. He's gone in deep. He's talking about cousins and all sorts. First jobs, favourite hobbies, goals and aspirations for the next five years. He's still talking now. That's the A to Z of New Zealand. Some people skip breakfast, the meal, and also this show.

It's Jono and Ben on the Hits. Now, our masks. We have two versions of masks thanks to kindface.co.nz because, you know, face masks are important to wear. Even though Auckland today has dropped down to level two,

it's still compulsory to be wearing them, as far as I know, on public transport. And it's a good idea to be wearing them to protect yourself and protect others.

That's great, yeah. We had a good range of them, didn't we? We've done two waves of them thanks to kindface.co.nz. The second wave a lot more popular. Featuring that man you just heard, Ashley Bloomfield. We started the unofficial Ashley Bloomfield fan club, the Baby Bloomers. They went like wildfire. Yeah, because on the mask, the face mask, it's got,

I'm a baby bloomer with a picture of Ashley Bloomfield. And yeah, people loving it, loving it. In fact, we've got a couple more to give away. Four, four, eight, seven, if you want some. Yeah, but you're saying you had a mask incident with our first wave of masks, which were more centered around a comedy theme. You know, fashion designers, Kanye, he's got his waves. Doesn't he? He releases his collections.

And we've had a couple of collections. The first wave was that this was our comedy era. Yeah, we thought we'd put face masks out there with funny slogans on them, like, no kissing, I'm married. Sorry, I've got really bad breath. I've got pash rash. And Producer Juliet, you had an incident where you went to the supermarket wearing a I've got pash rash on the side of your face.

And people stared at me, and I didn't wear it to the supermarket again. I wore a different one. So apologies for that. But it's all how you wear it. You've just got to wear it with confidence. I know. You've got to pretend that you don't have a mask on that says anything about a rash from a pash

and just wear it with pride because if you did have pash rash, you wouldn't be putting it on a billboard, would you? Well, yeah, you're probably right. But yesterday I went to the gas station. I went some gas and I had the kids in the car and they were like, oh, can we come in? Can we get an ice block? I was like, oh, okay.

Yeah, okay. We can get an ice block. And so I was like, well, let's wear a mask. One to share between the three of us. We can all share it. Ice block each. I was like, put a mask on. They've been really good at taking a mask around and putting it on.

And then Indy's like, oh, I didn't bring my mask today. It's not in my bag. And I'm like, oh, it's all good. I've got some in the car. And I had one of those, our first wave my bag. And I'm like, oh, it's all good, I've got some in the car. And I had one of those, our first wave of ones, and I was like, oh, it's got pass rash on it.

Went to give it to her, thinking, well, she won't know what pass rash is. And this is, you know, eight-year-old girl just looked at me and goes, I'm not wearing a pass rash mask. You're like, yeah,

that's not me. So who had to take the hit? Me. You did. I love how we're releasing these masks and not even the people responsible for them will wear them. And I'm like sitting there going,

oh, do I want to wear a pass-press mask? But I took the hit. I went in there. And then she wore the mask that I was going to wear in there. So, yeah. This is your new breakfast. Health Star rating still pending. It's Jono and Ben on the hits.

Now, there's a movie-length TV series that's coming to Prime TV tonight. It's called Inside. And joining us are two of the stars of that series. You'll know her from Wentworth, Neighbours and Mean Mums. You'll know him from the project, Seven Days in the Cash Converter's Ads. It's Morgana O'Reilly and Josh Thompson. How's it going, guys?

Now, I understand this whole show was filmed during Level 4. I know. It was like a blur. So you filmed in lockdown. It was all written in lockdown. The whole thing happened. It was written in lockdown, yeah. And then we started filming right as Level 2 kicked in. Yeah, yeah. Almost the first day of Level 2.

And we were like, we were really hoping that Level 2 would happen because it was initially designed to be able to be shot in Level 4. So that would have been, we're going to have to, oh my God, we're going to have to shoot all night while the kids are sleeping. We can't do this stuff. I was just going to say, how is filming a TV show

while you're also parenting? I know. Well then finally, so level two meant we could get childcare. Yeah, right. And so what is the programme about? It is about, it centres around this woman called Rose.

She's a germaphobe. She's a bit agoraphobic and she's always been an introvert who doesn't particularly like people, they make her feel nervous she was the kid that was picked on at school and then here comes a global pandemic which forces

everybody to be inside and she manages to find ways to, you remember when everyone was talking about Zoom bombing? Yeah. At the start of lockdown? Yeah. She does that, we call it bunny bombing and she watches people's conversations and she finds this kind of weird sense

of connection with people through that. Do they know that she's watching? No, they don't. Oh, right. So we actually collected all these Zoom bombs. We would just ask people if we could film their conversations and they're so compelling, like just so lovely watching we could film their conversations. And they're so compelling. Like, it's just so lovely watching people talk to each other.

It sounds simple. We've built a whole career on it. But meanwhile, she's got her flatmate. Which is you, Josh, right? Which is me, yeah. So they cast me as like an annoying, loud flatmate who's always in your face. And I don't know why they thought of me,

but they gave me a call and I was very excited to have You would have been a good flatmate I imagine Josh Johnson. I mean I may surprise a lot of people but I'm very tidy. Are you? Yeah even though I I think just because my like I've got a shambles face

people just assume that I'm There's a shambolic aura. Yeah yeah yeah A shambles face What a lovely mess. There's a shambolic aura. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A shambles face. What a lovely face. He's got lovely eyes. Lovely shambles. I'm happy with lovely shambles. Got Morgana O'Reilly with us and Josh Thompson.

New show which is out tonight. You can catch it on Prime called Inside. Morgana, obviously, Neighbours, you mentioned before. Wentworth as well. But I was reading about you earlier. I didn't realise that you worked in a New York as a fetish party once. Where did you read that?

I read that in an article. As I read it, I went, oh, I bet you wish you'd never said that in the article. I did. I was a foot prostitute. Were you? Did you get good cash? Yeah, I did.

I was young and I needed the money. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah. So how did it work? How did this work? Okay, well, I do remember my Craigslist searches got more and more dodgy from sort of nanny work through to there. Oh, so you started out as a nanny. Well, no, I couldn't find any work.

It was 2009. It was like global recession, and I needed to make my F. And then I saw this ad, and I remember what it said. It said, foot worship parties, no funny business, can make up to $300 a night. Oh, that's good cash. That's great cash. No funny business.

There's a lot of funny business. And I do remember thinking, my feet are the only part of my body that I have consistently liked. And so I applied for it. I had to send them a salt-free photo. I know. 300 US was it? Yeah. That's pretty good. I mean you had to play your cards right.

You didn't just have any old feet. No. And you did it. You had to hustle it a little bit. Work your feet. And I went to the, I got to go to a casting. Oh they're not just putting in. Oh, no, no.

Not any backyard feed in this operation. Yes, and I was so broke. Like, literally at one point, I was, New York is so expensive. I was tossing out tampons or dinner. Tampons or dinner. Oh, really? Yeah. Where did you go?

I can't remember. I think at that point I called mum. I was like, I can't choose. And so I went to the casting. A couple of ladies got sent away. Oh, did they? Oh, you made the cut? I made the cut.

Oh, lovely. Wouldn't you be so sad? You're like, my feet don't make the cut. Oh, I knew these babies would do me good. I knew it. Yeah. Wow. So you just walk around a bar all night.

On the night, you just wander around and they're like, hey, mate, put those bad boys in my mouth. If you were maybe in New Zealand, probably, yeah, that's how that is. But if you were just chatting. I regret asking this question now. I know. I thought some light radio band had already gone deep. I know.

I can stop any time. You can cut this out. Josh, good to have you, mate. Josh, Josh. Have you ever taken your toes to a foot-sucking bar? I think I should probably get involved in this. Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh

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Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh I'm like a bit of a rugged South Island foot champ. Josh Thompson, Morgana O'Reilly. Catch them tonight. It's on Prime. It's called Inside. It looks amazing. Always good to hang out.

Thanks for your time today, guys. Thank you. The radio version of Morning Breath. It's Jono and Ben on the hits. Spy. Launch into mess-free Mexican with the new old El Paso tortilla pocket. She is the bastion of celebrity news and also the bastion of shoeies at our work functions. That is correct.

We haven't seen Producer Juliet at a work function. We haven't had a work function because we've worked somewhere here during COVID. We have both spoken about Producer Juliet drinking out of a shoe, which is popular amongst the millennial people nowadays. It's probably moved on now, to be honest. Probably like, oh, that was so last year. Drinking out of a rotty, scungy old shoe. I feel like you've seen me in a very responsible way so far.

So I'm worried when you see me in a non-responsible way. I want our thoughts of you to change dramatically. That sounds like a plan. With Spy. Now, if you guys were showing photos of your babies when they were newborns side by side, would you be able to identify which was which, do you guys were showing photos of your babies when they were newborn side by side, would you be able to identify which was which? Do you think?

Well, you'd hope so, but I've seen the footage of this, and Alec Baldwin, it was a tough game, actually, to play. So Alec Baldwin was on The Ellen Show, and he's got five... Evil Ellen. Evil Ellen. What did Evil Ellen do this time? Did she throw Alec Baldwin under the bus? She did.

She did. Yeah, typical, typical. I know, right? So she showed him photos of all of his children slash some that weren't actually his children at all and got him to identify which one it was. He just had a baby, right? He's just had a baby as well, nine days old.

The baby was wrapped up in a blanket with a beanie on and other babies that look quite similar. He's over Zoom, okay? He's not a boomer, but he's probably getting close, right? And this is how he went. I'm going to say because of the blanket, I'm going to say that that's Ross. Really?

Not your baby. Your picture's frozen. Let's take a look at another one. I'd say that's Ross. That's Ross. That's Eduardo. That's your brand new baby. See, okay.

One for four. That's your baby that you just had nine days ago. It has not changed that much. Isn't that just amazing? I love that. I thought he did it when they were all adults, and he's like, I don't know. You got me.

You could probably do that with Tom Cruise and Suri. He hasn't seen Suri in about... Suri's now 49. Yeah, pretty much. And that is my thanks to Old El Paso. You can launch into some mess free Mexican with their brand new tortilla pockets. Want more Jono and Ben?

You can catch up with the boys anytime. Just search Jono and Ben on Facebook. Now we want to know right now, why is it going to be a good day for you? Hey feeling good. I'd like to leave our show on a positive note to get you all ready for the day ahead. And on our 100 The Hits, why is it going to be a good day?

Well we'll go to Emma in Auckland. Kia ora Emma, welcome to New Zealand's Breakfast. Why is it going to be a good one for you? Because it just started raining and I'm indoors for work today. What do you do? Where do you work? CPS. CPS you work? CPS. CPS? I love CPS.

It's my favourite company with three letters in the title. Everyone knows what it is as well. It's just great. It is great. Yeah, I know what CPS is. What is CPS? Do you? It's just, honestly, I don't really know.

Honestly, I don't know. I just turn up here and I'm just glad to be inside because it's raining. I work really hard. Oh, the boy, the stuff I'm doing for CPS. Oh, well, you have a great day, Emma. And we're going to flick you out a golf ball so you've got a chance of winning $10,000. Oh, thank you. Good on you, Emma.

Love your work. Yes, we are heading to Lake Taupo to try and land the novelty hole-in-one golf attraction, which is a pontoon on the lake. And if we get a hole-in-one, $10,000 we win. We're going to hit 1,000 balls. And we're allocating numbers to each ball we hit, each of the 1,000, and we're just giving one number to Emma. Well, Darrell, why is it going to be a good day

in Greymouth on the West Coast, my friend? Well, it's an absolutely fabulous day. Got to the supermarket first, loaded up, bombed it in my brain. Yeah, what? Sorry, Darrell, I understood about 70% of that. You got to the supermarket, you've been loaded up, bombed it in my brain. Sorry, Darrell, I understood about 70% of that. You got to the supermarket, you've been loaded up, you're all set to go. I've got a 15-pound cat that's only three days old.

You've got a 15-pound cat as well? A big cat. That's a lot of... No wonder you're at the supermarket early. There's a lot of whiskers you have to buy. 15-pound cat. I need sardines. Oh, you eat sardines.

Sounds like you can eat a person. 15 pounds? Yeah. He might have got the mid-Canterbury panther or something. Geez. I don't want anything from Canterbury. Okay. No, he's on the West Coast, Ben. Alright, he's got a 15-pound cat, for goodness sake. Well, Darrell, we're going to give you a golf ball, and

you have a chance of winning $10,000, alright? Massive. Yes, good on you, Gerald. Enjoy your day. Thanks for listening. Thanks. We're going to head to Taranaki. Nikita, how are you this morning?

I'm tired. How's Taranaki? Why, when you're tired, would you phone a radio show? That'd be the last thing on my list of stuff to do. But it's great you did. Hi. What's happening today? I'm actually back in bed.

Have you been working all night? No, no. My four-year-old woke up at 3.30, woke my sister up, woke everybody up, her two little boys. So I've just dropped everyone off at school and kinder, and I've gone back to bed. Oh, nice.

And you're living, that's all I dream of doing. I was having this conversation the other morning. I was having a debate with my son, Oscar. I was like, because, you know, kids, they refuse to go to bed. Yeah, they hate sleeping, right? I was like, you're reaching age in life when all you want to do is sleep. Like, right now, all I want to do is put my head on this desk and fall asleep. Yeah, you can't do it.

I want to go to our toilet here at work and just lie on the floor and sleep. Ew. Doesn't that sound like a dream come true? Well, not really, the toilet floor. No, no, not around the toilet. I could sleep anywhere. Hey, so how long are you going to sleep for? Talk to us, talk to us.

Well, I have to be up by 2.30 because I live in Fitzroy and I have to go to Englewood. Oh, 2.30. So you've got 9, 10, 11, 12. You don't want to oversleep during the day because then you won't sleep

at night, will you? Oh, no, I definitely will. I'm a good sleeper. You could have four hours of uninterrupted, oh my God, in the middle of the day. Parents all over New Zealand

are like this. Oh, this is just, we should be paying for this phone call. I know, an 100 number. Are you in bed now? Oh yeah, I am. Is there a nice cushy pillow? Yeah. Lucky, lucky, lucky. Well, we're going to make your day even better.

We're going to give you one of our allocated golf balls so you could win $10,000 if we nail the hole in one. That would be awesome. Good on you, Nikita. Sweet dreams, and I'm very jealous. Thank you. Should we quickly try and take one more call before we go? We'll head to Murray's Bay. Louisa, you're on the air.

What is it going to be a good day for you, matey? Yes, morning, Jono. That is going to be a fabulous day because we're new to New Zealand and my girls have settled and are very happy, and that makes my heart very happy. Oh, that's awesome. If your heart's happy happy and that makes my heart very happy. That's awesome. If your heart's happy, Louisa, my heart is happy.

It could be that or the clogged arteries. You've got a golf ball, your chance to win $10,000 could be yours tomorrow. We'll see you tomorrow from 6 o'clock. Have a great day. Want more Jono and Ben? You can wake up with the boys weekdays from 6 on The Hits and via the iHeartRadio app. Jono and Ben on The Hits Breakfast.

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