Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Show Highlights: How Jono scored a life ban from acupuncture!

Episode Date: October 19, 2023

Jonos offensive act at acupuncture. Ben's daughter embarrassed him at the store. The most controversial sliced chicken! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Thanks to Challenge, putting the service back into service stations. Talk a wee bit about people doing medical trials, clinical trials this week. You've heard some ads on the radio for it throughout the country. I'd like to donate this body to science, if science is willing to pay for it. Ben, you seem to think that I might not grab time. I don't know. I'm aware I'm not going to get top dollar. I'm not going to fetch top dollar for this body. But what are the pros and cons of it? The extra limbs, the mutated fingers, is it all worth the money? Clinical trials.

And Brendan is with us. Hi, welcome. Hey. A clinical trial, a seasoned veteran of clinical trials. Yeah, I also had my face on the back of a bus for a while. It's the 1.2 advertising for these guys. Oh, really? So how long ago did you take part in these trials?

Just on and off over the past sort of seven years. All right. And are you talking to us through a telephone at the moment, or is this like, you know, through your mind, telepathically? No, no, just telephone, yeah. So do you get paid for the trials? Yep. Yeah, you get paid.

It's a pretty good gig. I work, my main job is like software, so I actually can work remotely from there, so it's like two jobs at the same time. Ah, that's handy. So what sort of stuff do you know? How much do they tell you before going into one of these clinical trials? Yeah, they talk to you about all the side effects

and give you all the details, and you can pull out any client even during the trial. So it's kind of, yeah, but you feel like you're doing a good thing and friends who've gone through diseases and stuff so that you feel like you're helping out as well as getting money, obviously. So it's pretty cool. You're like, what's the major side effect of how much money I'm going to earn here? That would be my thing.

If you don't mind me asking, over your period of doing clinical trials, how much money do you think you've pulled in? Sort of $60,000 to $70,000. Really? What? Yeah, yeah. That's a full salary. That's crazy.

But that's over quite a few years, though. But it's been really good. I managed to save up for house deposit. It's just been good. Have there been any really gnarly things that you're like, wow, that was a wild trial? No. No side effects at all

really. Because you would think that through the research process that they've got the thing they're testing on you to a certain state. Yeah. Like a safe, consumable stage. Yeah, they do, yeah. So they have their checks and balances,

and they've tested it out in sort of animal testing as well with some of them. That's why I love the animal testing. Get it out, put the makeup testing on the pigs. They love the lipstick and the mascara. We don't want that. That's awesome. And so do you just, what, sit in a room for five days?

Just like a hotel? Yeah, they've got like a sort of entertainment, sort of timeout areas where you can sort of work. They've got Xbox, pool tables, that kind of stuff. A holiday. Kind of like a holiday where, yeah. Jesus, this is a bloody great advert for clinical trials. I'm in.

I am in. Obviously, there's risks involved and you've got to, you involved, and they'll work through all those things for you. But, jeez, yeah, someone who's lived through it, got a great amount of money, and, yeah, turned their life around because of it. Do you know, because through testing, obviously, some of the trialists, they'll be taking the placebo pills, wouldn't they? Yeah. So that's what I reckon.

I reckon I've had a few placebos over the years um because i've had no no sort of like noticeable side effects um but you don't know it's all blind and the nurses don't know either so oh and do they tell you afterwards like they no they don't have you no they don't you do get a sort of like a information once they finish the trial to let you know how successful it was like a few months down the track Which is quite cool. But yeah, you don't really find out about the placebo thing So essentially you've just you know played Xbox, sat in a cool room Taking sugar pills for five days and getting paid thousands of dollars. Yeah, it's pretty good. That's incredible Do you find that like sometimes someone will go I've got a sore throat and then you'll go

Oh, do I have a sore throat? You know, you'll start to – do you find that that could happen as well? Yeah, and you're constantly watching everyone else to see if anyone – and the nurses don't say anything, so you're kind of like – you're just watching and seeing, oh, suddenly there's one less person in the clinic. What happened to that person? Where did they go? I think God's going on here.

I'd be very worried. What happened to Jack? Where's Jack they go? I think I was going on, yeah. I'd be very worried. What happened to Jack? Where's Jack gone? You'd be a nightmare. Ben Boyce would be like, why is he bleeding from the ears? Am I bleeding from the ears? Can I be bleeding from the ears? Why is he frothing?

Yeah. That's amazing, Brendan. Wowee. So would you suggest, hey, give it a crack? Yeah, definitely I would. I mean, obviously, like, you know, read all the details, read the risks and that. And definitely don't do a long trial on your first one, do like a short one because they can get quite long and then you're not used to being away from the world for that sort of period of time. It can be a bit tricky.

Now, just asking for a friend, you haven't been part of like a very successful hair regrowth trial? No. No, okay. We'll keep your details, you just text us when you come through and the results of that, all right? No worries. Awesome. Hey, thanks for sharing that with us. Yeah, have a good day. We're talking about icks the last couple of days,

the little things that maybe give you a little bit of a, well, the name kind of suggests what it is, maybe irk you a little bit, makes you feel a bit icky about something about your partner. Not enough to break up with them, right, Producer Taylor? No, I mean, I can lead to that, depending on what it is. But normally it's just like, oh, that's a bit off-putting. Now, you said both of us had multiple icks you had listed.

You actually written them down on a piece of paper and read them to us yesterday. Even before we decided to talk about it, you'd been noting them down. Felt like you were taking them to a performance review or something and they were like the top three of each i had like probably 10 to 10 of each you should pick the big bangers and what's some highlights from that uh well ben's actually on show today with one of the x i'm glad that went in one ear and out the other well i saw them at the door this morning it was that crocs with it was and with socks i was like yeah well i'm gonna it today. So I got my Crocs and socks. Thanks for that.

Because you were worried that once you knew about the ick that you would be self-conscious and back out of it. But he's doubled down. I haven't worn my Crocs to work

because I'll be like, oh, they dress it down a bit. They're not quite smart enough for work. But today I was like, well, I'll do it. Just to ick you. Just to ick you.

Icking you hard. Is it still icking you? A little bit? Yeah, yeah. Especially with your chinos that you've got going there. It's a lot. It's a lot. It's a lot going on.

Okay. And then I scooter to work, which... I noticed you do that today as well. Yeah. Electric scooter to work. And that irks Taylor. A grown man on a scooter? It's not the grown man on a scooter.

It's the grown man on a scooter for 500 metres. The laziness of the scooter. So we're going to open this up again this morning. What's hooking you? Not necessarily about your partner. I've got one about you. Go. You talk to your dog like a baby.

That is true. Although you do the same thing. I do. I was caught on security camera doing it. Yeah, you did. You brought it in like a week or two ago, didn't you? Oh, my God. So your wreck is mine.

Yeah, yeah. There we go. Here's what someone got yesterday. Courtney, you got it, Nick? The scraping of a bowl after ice cream or cereal. Now, Michelle. Yeah, she doesn't make anything out of the washing properly. And Michelle's issue was she wasn't using the same colour pegs.

She has pegs dedicated to different garments. The red pegs, underpants. Two green pegs have to go over the T-shirts and whatnot. So those are some of the X. If you've got some 0800, the hits, you can text 4487 this morning. And clinic one involving sliced chicken, diced chicken, that I actually do as well. That's in three minutes on the hits.

The hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Talking X this morning Oh 800 the hits Georgie you've got one with your partner I do it's not a big one But it does drive me up the wall a little bit He will buy pre-diced chicken Instead of buying a chicken breast and dicing it himself Hey I do that

Really? Really? If I could not touch raw chicken I will take that option Every time I'll cut a little hole Really? Yeah, well, see, if I could not touch raw chicken, I will take that option every time. I'll cut a little hole in the bottom of the thing and tip it into a hot pan so you don't have to – and then it goes straight in the bin. So you're not handling the chicken at all. I've had caprobactin before, so I'm like, hey, I love chicken,

so that's the way to not touch the chicken. Hey, I mean, fair enough. I just think it seems so silly to me. You waste an extra few dollars just so that it's cut for you and it would take you like 30 seconds it doesn't take you're right it doesn't take long yeah so george so has this become a bit of a chicken bone of contention in your household has it it has a little bit i do bring it up every time i put it up last night actually what's his reason for doing it like is it the same as me or is he just kind of like he just doesn't want to have to cut it. He doesn't want to waste the extra 30 seconds.

That's right. Time, same. And you know why he doesn't want to waste that 30 seconds? Because he wants to spend that valuable time with you, Georgia. Oh, bless your heart. No. Hey, Georgia, we're going to send you out some hell pizzas for you. Oh, awesome.

Cheers. And they'll cut the chicken for you, and they'll put it on the pizza, if you order chicken pizza. You're like, this is all diced up. What's going on? How you going, mate? Have a good one. Kylie, how are you?

I'm great, great. How are you? We're doing all right. Love your work. Love your mahi. Oh, we love yours. Well, we're talking X, and you've got one that really gives you

a bit of a yuck feeling. Oh, it just makes me sick. I've deserved it more than once when people use their fingers to clean between their toes. Oh, yeah. And then they smelly fingers or see me pick up food and eat it

without washing their hands. Oh, then they don't wash their hands. Yeah. No, I mean, I was seen cutting my toenails poolside. By a pool overseas, weren't you? Someone was like, John, I was by the pool trimming his toenails. That's not an act.

I don't know what is. But I don't like yucky, dirty toes, anything. Those are gross. That's gross. Smelling your fingers is always a suspicious act, isn't it? Do you think it's gross? Yeah, I understand why, because it's the intrigue. You're like

I wonder what that smells like and it just becomes too much for some people. Curiosity. Kills the person. It causes the ick. Kylie, really appreciate it. No, all good. Thank you.

The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. And Auckland Bay's pizzeria has got a spot in the top 50 pizza restaurants in the world. Dante's Pizzeria, there's three of them around the Auckland region and it's got number 47 out of places that do pizza in the world

and there's thousands of places as well. Oh, remember we wanted to once go to New York on one of our Pointless Missions and visit every pizzeria in the city in the centralised Manhattan area. There's over a thousand. And eat like a slice of pizza at every one. We're like, well, that would take a while. Some sources say there might, I've just looked now, might even be nearly as much as 2,000 places

we can get pizza in central New York. So for someone in New Zealand to get inside the top 50. That's pretty incredible. If there was one food that I could survive on for the rest of life, it would be pizza. So versatile. What would it be for you?

It'd be like salad. I was going to say salad Yeah I was going to say salad Well if I was going to survive That was all I was eating Like I love pizza Don't get me wrong But if it's all You know

My kids the other night Had a Nutella pizza At a place for dessert With Nutella on pizza Yeah I was like wow It's versatile Yeah and it was And I was like jeez

You can have a You can have pizza for dessert You can put a salad on a pizza too You could Yeah you could You're right Actually speaking of food we're in a shop yesterday uh sushi shop my daughter and I and one of those places where you go along and you're putting your sushi onto your into your own container as you sort of slowly move along the sort of I know the setup conveyor belt sort of thing oh is it on a conveyor belt not conveyor belt so you feel like you're on a

conveyor belt because you're moving along and always for the pressure that someone else is next to me, I'm like, just got to grab this stuff. And I don't want to take long. Don't want to go back. Can you go back in that situation? Once you're in that line, once you're moving, there's no turning back. You had your chance to grab the salmon and avocado. You can get out of the line and then go back to the line again.

But you can't just reach across, open a sliding door, and get another bit of sushi. Anyway, we got to the end of the line, put our little containers of sushi together, and you had to carry it maybe a meter to the lady at the counter, and my daughter just fell out of her hand all over the floor. She felt awful. Were you like, she's not mine? Not my responsibility?

She's like, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. Look at me, I'm so sorry. And that's the situation because you haven't paid for it like had I paid for it that's all on but I was like well I did offer to pay for it

and she's like don't worry about it you can start back at the end and do it again and I'm like are you sure but it was lovely of the lady to do that

because a minute later that's I paid for it it's all on us yeah and it's a sticky rice I find very sticky substance

isn't it hard to get off the floor too it sticks to your kitchen floor and things you're trying to pick it up for them did you do the cleanup job yeah i did the cleanup job again i offered to pay for it but it just it feels like those awkward moments happens in the store when you know even if someone accidentally breaks something in a store it's the same thing where you're like what's the what happens here i did that i reversed my caboose into something at Pack and Save once when I was just bending over to get something from the bottom. Boom, knocked over a whole display.

Oh, did anything break? Yeah, it was like scorched almonds or something. No, no, scorched almonds didn't break. They just scattered all the boxes scattered over the floor. And then you pick it up. And then when people come and help, you're like, oh, don't help because you're making a scene. Yeah, and you're always offered to pay for it.

Sometimes I guess you would have to pay for that. But I don't have a whole... Remember that in Palmerston North, we were at the supermarket, just in there grabbing some beers, and for some reason it stuck together, the beer I grabbed, everywhere. 12 bottles. 12 bottles just everywhere. You were on the floor trying to drink it all up.

I was like, don't let that go to waste, mate. Floor suck, floor suck. You're like, 12 fallen soldiers, I'll get you. And then you apologise, you pay for it, and you're like, oh, Jesus. You're like, well, you've got to pay for it now. You've got your weird mate sucking it all up off the floor. He's got to leave the store, he's drunk.

Producer Taylor, she's moved here from Australia 12 months ago. She's like, I've never really experienced this country with any sunshine. Oh, last summer was a shocker. It was, yeah. But I tell you, she's like, this week we've had two days of it. More sunshine she's had than the last 12 months. Yeah.

So what happens here, mate? We've got sun here. Not just Australia. Not for long, though. I've been getting some acupuncture done. Been rambling on about that to your Ben, sorry, back issues. And had another appointment yesterday and so many needles in there. And they don't actually hurt

but you feel like a hedgehog by the end of it. There's so many sort of needles stabbed into you in various places. How many would you get? I guess it would vary on the... I don't know, I can't see. Right.

Yeah. But I find the whole process because it happens over sort of 45 minutes to an hour so relaxing. So I'm very vulnerable physician face down on those massage tables yeah and you got your head through that you know that comfortable hole that little circular hole

thing yeah yeah they should make beds like that like normal sleeping beds before you if so sleep face it could you sleep like that oh yeah i guess i would i don't know how the i don't have the blood rushing i don't know if it or if it was an option to go spend a couple hours doing that and then roll around. So you had like a little door that you could open and shut. Face door. Yeah, I don't know. I'd give it a go. Yeah.

So you're lying there. I feel like a sort of a needle exchange with the amount of needles that are sort of stabbed into you. And I slowly, you know me, sleepy guy at the best of times. I fall asleep, yeah and i wake up and i'm hearing the acupuncture is asking me a question and i'm like how long have i been asleep for how many questions have been asked and i've been giving no response that's my first worry and then i look down because all you can see is the ground and I can just all I can see is this big bungee cord of drool

and it's dangling there and I'm like okay I can't let the acupuncturist see this drool so I'm trying to because you probably couldn't reach I can't reach round that's not an option so I'm trying to like self suck it back in and then eventually it kind of just

the bungee cord gives way and it joins a already previously a pre-made puddle that i'd already done so i'm going this is not a good look and my pitch to the massage acupuncture physio industry let's have a drill bucket down there you could yeah, yeah. Just a little sort of. If there's a leak in the roof, you put a bucket out, that sort of thing. Yeah, you could have one of those. And it's on the client, the customer to go and rinse it out. Rinse it out afterwards, yeah.

Yeah, okay. The other part of that process I really enjoy too is, and it happens in doctor surgery as well, is when you have to remove clothing and they're like, I'll let you take your clothes off, but then they get out of the room and I'm like well in less than 60 seconds you're gonna see everything that I've got anyway. Yeah just gonna come back. I mean all we're avoiding is the awkward me taking my clothes off part. You probably don't need to leave the room but I appreciate the sentiment.