Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Show Highlights: More Crazy Ghost Stories!

Episode Date: October 31, 2023

Crazy ghost stories! The Kiwi who messed up on a tattoo for the world cup The father who accidentally engaged with his daughter on a stag do! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Thanks to Challenge, putting the service back into service stations. Wednesday morning, last night was of course Halloween. It was a bit of wet weather around the place, but lots of people out in the neighbourhood, including my family and I, we went out in our costumes. Looking fantastic too, Ken and Barbie. My wife and I, Ken and Barbie. The rollerblading Ken and Barbie in the fluoro costumes from the movie. One of my daughters was in the scream mask, Indy in the scream costume, and Sienna was a tinkerbell.

Wonderful night too. Basically the only night of the year where your average hardworking psychotic murderer can actually just blend in. Yeah. You know, just blend in with the masses. And you send the kids to random houses that you don't know. The higher danger. The creepier the better.

There's a bit of stuff I wanted to reflect on from last night heading out and about because the weather was a bit sketchy I had rollerblades as well but that didn't stop us, we pushed on. How's it going? It's going great, I've got a whole load. Have you been eating at all? Most of it actually. Maybe.

But that's okay, we're still going. With the rain we're pushing on right? Pushing on, got our umbrellas, let's go yeah should i put the rollerblades back on no you're gonna fall over and then you see you know why'd you make me put the rollerblades on yeah true we've got great kennedy though yeah so the rollerblades weren't the best uh slippery underfoot it's been my concern all week so i went with the sneakers midway through my wife committed a lot more than me in fact she, she committed the whole way through. All night, she just kept saying this in the Barbie costume.

You've really committed to the Barbie role. Every time somebody says hi to you, what do you say? Oh, hi, Ken. Oh, hi, Ken. It's very high. Oh, hi, Ken. A little bit Mickey Mouses. Mouses, yeah.

Method. Yeah. How is it for you? Because I know it would be quite a conflict. You love costumes, but you hate bad food. You know, you've got... Yeah, true. There's no carrots or...

Sugar and... Yeah. Like, did you... What was your household handing out? Like, little celery sticks and hummus and things? No, we went full... Yeah, candy. It's okay.

It's one special occasion. I'm back to carrots and hummus today. The other thing I noticed last night as well uh not great for recording radio with one of my daughters indy who had the mask on uh the scream mask a lot why are you doing this now i want an update i want an update the people with your fans want to know how's it going it's going good but um you need to go early like so i don't know what you're saying i don't know i was like talking to someone with a covid mask the other thing was too, there was a lot of scream people around. So halfway through, because I had a whole lot of kids,

they were all their friends and stuff. And over three, you're like, four of those, three. And you're like, which of the scream ones? You could have picked up a random kid. No, because they committed to the masks as well. But one more final thing I thought was just quite genius. My daughter's found a hack. And I think you could use this next Halloween if you're listening right now.

What's your hack? Okay, so you're trick-or-treating, you go into like one of those dairies, like the corner dairies or whatever, and you go trick-or-treat, what are they going to do? They've got a store full of lollies. Oh, you're right, maybe we just go dairy to dairy. It's not like they're going to say no, get out. Like a lovely ram raid, like a very polite ram raid. Yeah, just like, I have some lovely for free.

Yeah, wow, okay, I think you found a hack. And it worked. Yeah, it worked. Went to the dairy, and the lovely guy behind the dairy went, yeah, okay, yeah. Well, when she was like, it's not like they're going to say, no, get out, I'm like, well, that's exactly what they're going to say. Hey, optimism works.

It works, yeah. If I was in the dairy, I'd be like, no, get out. Yeah, it's definitely a safety in numbers thing, the costumes, because we went to, we heard about this great area and then we drove some kids, my wife drove some kids there and I was like, I'll walk back from this area because there wasn't enough room in the car. But when you're by yourself, you're just in fluoro stuff.

Yeah. For like a 5K walk, you're like. Fluoro highlighter pink. Lighter twos. Yeah, mate. Oh, yeah. Hi, mate. It looked like you'd been on a stag, dude, that had gone horribly, horribly wrong. Flurro, highlight of pink Lot of twos Yeah mate Oh yeah, hi mate Yeah, it looked like you'd been on a stag dude That'd gone horribly, horribly wrong

You definitely want a kid helping you out of that situation Yeah, like just a guy walking the streets by himself in Flurro Anyway, that was me last night Which you know, you've got to give it up for Ken He was out there in public He was doing it He was doing it, you're right Now the dust is slowly settling

On Sunday, Ben Boyce We're just sort of tying up some loose ends Oh, you're right. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now the dust is slowly settling. On Sunday, Ben Boyce, we're just sort of tying up some loose ends. Last week we spoke to a huge All Black fan, Emily, who made quite the commitment before the final. I texted my dad and I told him that if we won the World Cup, then I'd get a tattoo. And then I was talking to my friend James about it and he said that it would just be a lot funnier if I got it before as like a bit of a predictor.

James, you shouldn't have listened to James. That's your problem. Although James is right. It is a lot. Yeah, and she did. She listened to James, and she went out and got a Rugby World Cup winner's tattoo with a trophy for the All Blacks before the World Cup final, and it was close, but it wasn't to be.

So, you know, you do feel for the players their bodies were on the line but jeez Emily's body was on the line before the game had even started so we just want to phone her and just see how things are feeling now for her Hello? Emily Hello? It's Jono

and Ben, your old mates Jono and Ben from the Hits Radio Station. Hi. Now, we like to offer a full service when you come onto this show. Yeah. Like to close the loop on all guests. Yeah, it's like hair transplants before and after. Yeah. So, you know why we're calling?

I can imagine. No, honestly, like that game in the weekend was tense for everyone in New Zealand but for you, probably more so It was horrible You had a lot riding on this One minute you were like, yes the tattoo is great No, it's not going to be great

It was definitely a bit of a rollercoaster We all know what happened in the end, but what is going to happen to Rugby World Cup champions 2023 All Blacks tattoo on your body? I'm going to change the 23 to 27. We're looking ahead four more years. We're putting it in early.

We'll get it next time. It is like it's kind of the outline of the William Webb Ellis Trophy, right? Yeah. So you could colour it all in. I could. Or you could put South Africa. Yeah, I could do that. Why don't you change it to a piece of biltong or something?

Oh, God. A springbok. Because it doesn't actually say, in your defence, it doesn't say New Zealand World Champs, right? Oh, no, it does. It says an NZ underneath, doesn't it?

Yeah, it does. Yeah. So, no, sorry, I was going to help you out there, but no, I can't. But no, honestly, were you, obviously

genuinely gutted for the team, but for the tattoo, were you actually going, uh-oh, what have I done? Well, I think that from the start, I knew that would be funny either way,

so that wasn't really too big. It's like it's funny that we lost. It's funny, yeah. I think it's funny. Well, it's not funny we lost, but it's funny for your tattoo. Like it's almost like, you know, oh, remember that World Cup? Yeah. So you've got – it's probably one of those things that's probably worth more

because of it, right? Yeah, it's gone up in value. I could sell it for an increased price. Exactly. Yeah, and it's become, I think, an even better news because we wouldn't be calling you if they had one. Yeah, no, that's fair. What you wanted was more airtime on New Zealand's ninth highest rating radio breakfast show? Yeah, honestly, that makes it all worth it, eh?

And I don't know if anyone else has called you back. People have probably talked to you beforehand and left you. Yeah, well, there was a news lady at the pub who asked me if I wanted to talk to her, and I was crying, so I said no. You actually shed tears at the end of the game. Oh, it was just so – it just really felt like we were rubbed in that one. I do think we played a lot better than they did. Yeah, I did.

It was a gutting game we're all trying to move on from it you've got a constant reminder well clearly we're not because we're

calling you three days later anyway hey thank you for being such a good sport about it no problem at least it's a

memory yeah right could be worse yeah could be worse that's right you go and have a great day awesome thank you guys And at least it's a memory. Yeah, right? Could be worse. Yeah, could be worse. That's right. You go and have a great day. Awesome.

Thank you, guys. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Hey, it was Halloween last night. It was a weird old Halloween. Headed to the streets out there with the family and Barbie and Ken. Rollerblades, the fluoro ones from the movie. And the conditions were pretty wet. My daughter, Sienna, was happy to get the chocolates, but not happy with me on rollerblades.

How's it going? It's going great. I've got a whole load. Have you been eating at all? Most of it, actually. Maybe. But that's OK. We're still going.

Yeah, we're still going. With the rain, we're pushing on, right? Pushing on. Got our umbrellas. Let's go. Yeah, should I put the rollerblades back on? No. You're going to fall over.

And then you're like, Sienna, why'd you make me put the rollerblades on true i've got great kennergy though they were kid-sized rollerblades too so my feet were very much felt like one of those you know chinese gymnasts you know squeeze them in yeah yeah uh how many times did you say the word kennedy lots yeah uh but it was weird too it was a bit of a damp no wasn't it for hello we only had like two kids turn up. Oh, really? Did you have decorations out the front? Yes.

Oh, yeah, right. Yeah, because that's when Patricia Jarl was like, we're new kids. I was like, well, do you have any decorations to show that this was a house that, it was like, oh, no. We had a zombie dangling from a tree branch. So two kids, one Jehovah's Witness.

Oh. And, you know, I've come over to the side, the dark side, Jehovah's Witness now. Gave him a couple of Macintoshes, sent him on his way. It was you know, I've come over to the side, the dark side. Jehovah's Witness now. Gave him a couple of Macintoshes, sent him on his way. It was good the weather kind of held off in the end, which was nice, getting out and about. Lots of kids out and about, and it's the time to talk about ghost stories. Yeah, we kicked this

off yesterday. Jeez, some bangers came through. I was lying down on my blankets right up to my chest, and I could feel something grab my legs. And I was just like, what the up to my chest, and I could feel something grab my legs. Oh, no. And I was just like, what the heck? Yeah. And I couldn't move or speak or anything,

and it wasn't, you know, that sleep paralysis stuff. It was something totally different. And I tried to whack on the wall behind me where my flatmate's room was. I tried to yell out her name, and I couldn't. It was just horrible. I was down the end of my bed with my blanket still up to my chest, but I was at the end of the bed. I'd physically been pulled right down.

So what, by your ankles? Yeah. I felt the grip first and then I felt nothing really. I couldn't really move or anything. And then we found out later on, because we lived right next to the cemetery, back in the war days when everyone died and stuff like that, they'd just dig pits and bury people in them. And she reckoned that the house was probably built on one of those pits.

Frightening stuff there. I remember we were doing an MC gig for a company and we were in Taupo and we were staying at the hotel. Just as we were going to bed the person behind the counter, the lovely gentleman's like, be careful up there that wing's haunted. Are those the last words you want to hear as you're heading off to bed? Apparently a certain part of the hotel is

or has been rumoured to be. And also a great trick to keep people awake at night, anxious, paranoid. But if anything it was a friendly evening. I think things went well. Maybe the ghost in there was like, oh, look how pasty and white he is. He's one of us. He'll be fine.

We'll leave him alone. Yeah. So we got a text through after the show yesterday, which we're going to call back in just a moment. This seems like a horrifying story. It's an imaginary child, bouncing balls, someone coming in to exercise the house. The hits, the Jono and Ben podcast.

Producer Taylor. She comes in here, she's all bloody incense and, you know, dream catchers, Producer Taylor. I've had so many ghost sightings to be fair.

I feel like I'm just so open to that world and it's always around 3am. But anywho, that's another story for the day. Have you been drinking? Not yet. Just got home from town town so pretty much when covid hit the warriors had to all move to um sydney at this place called terrigal and we were all put in this hotel kind of little community now because producer taylor's married to one of the warriors marcella went to it yeah yeah that's

important just to bring you up to speed not a a groupie, just follow the groupies everywhere they go. Who's the hussy who follows us all around the place? And me and my husband were put up in this room and we were across the hall. You could see other rooms so we could look in each other's balconies and all that. And in this apartment, I always felt that someone was watching me and I was alone a lot of the time. And I could feel in the kitchen, people's like just a presence but it started getting really weird where lights would start flicking on randomly by themselves and I'd wake up in the middle of the night and go to my husband oh my god someone just turned the lights on and he kind of didn't think anything of it one weekend we were away and one of my friends who lived across

across the hall from us said oh my god what are you guys doing in there are you having a rave and i was like what do you mean i'm not home and she goes are you sure and i was like yeah of course she goes well someone's in your apartment flicking the lights off and on and there's really loud music playing so and i was like what the hell so i got a friend to go and break in and no one was in there. No way. And then it gets worse. Why did you get a friend to break in to?

We were, like, there was a room above us that always had footsteps running around like little kids. I was like, I'm going to kill those bloody kids. Went to reception, told them to give them a lecture. She said no one had been in there for six months. Wow. Story done. But the place did have a duck. Do you know what? give them a lecture she said no one had been in there for six months wow story done but do you have it you know what you haven't taken a breath i i haven't digested any of your story because you're talking so quickly because we've got calls

just a moment that's all right i was just your time, but you pretty much told the story. No, well, there's more then. You sound more crazy and unhinged the faster you talk now. So that place that we were staying at, I did some Googling, turned out it used to be an old Catholic school, but on the street there was a massacre. People were killed. A way to bring the vibes down at breakfast. Now we can't keep laughing, can we? Massacre. Oh, jeez. People were killed. Way to bring the vibes down at breakfast. Well, I thought that was obviously spirit. Now we can't keep laughing, can we? Jeez.

Massacre vibe. So what we'll do for the audience, too, if you listen to that story, what we'll do is we'll record it and we'll play it in slow motion. Like a director's commentary. So what I was saying here, what I meant to say here, just say it. Before I come on air, don't say Taylor, you've got a minute to blow our story. Because I don't tell quick stories.

Alright. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. I went home to the Hits telephone number. Ghost stories. We've got Nicky with us. You've got a haunted story. Yes, our house was. What happened? My husband was away at the time with work,

so my daughter used to have night terrors, almost like clockwork, so I'd have to take her out, calm her down. She'd end up in my room. One night, I could hear things dropping on the ground, and I got up, and there was nothing there, and I could hear a ball going up and down the hallway. Got up, there's nothing there.

And it was very, very cold. The whole hallway was freezing cold. A lot of things had happened. I could hear what I thought was a kid's sleep talking, but it kind of sounded like it was behind the TV. So I go and check on the kids. No, they're fast asleep. So I went and saw a spiritual person.

She touched my hand and said, oh, there's a little boy in your hallway at the moment. No. And I was like, what? She said, yeah, there's a little boy, about four years old. He's just playing in your hallway at the moment. I was like, right. I don't want to go home anymore. So to cut a long story short, a lot of things were happening.

So in the end, I got her around to get rid of him. And he said, his name's Oliver. He's four years old. Now, I kept feeling like somebody was watching me in the bathroom all the time. Just like, yeah, I could feel someone watching me. That's a creepy feeling. He drowned in a bathroom. So he wouldn't go into any bathrooms.

So he'd just wait for me outside the bath. Jeez. Yeah. So the night terrors were because he was jumping off her bedside cabinet onto her bed. Oh, my goodness. And he was, what, playing in the bedroom overnight? Yeah. So you guys obviously moved in the bedroom overnight? Yeah.

So you guys, did you move out of that house? No. It was a nice house. So how did it, did it stop? I mean, what happened? So I got the lady around to actually, you know, get rid of this guy, this boy. And he said I reminded him of his mum, which is why he came to me. But yeah, so we went round.

I had to do the whole smudging thing and white sage and everything like that. And he turned the lights on and he turned the radio on as he left. And he's gone. And he's gone. The house feels so warm now. It was so cold.

And so when the person comes over to, I guess, exercise the ghost or whatever they do, do some burpees. Ten star jobs. No, are they talking to the ghost? Like going, yep, yep, yep, I know what you're saying. No, she goes, oh, look, there he is there. He's just watching us.

Wow. Are you like... Yeah. Because when she got to my place, she goes, oh, he's outside playing on the swings. And I looked outside and the swings were moving. So were you a believer of ghosts before living in that house? Not really. And so now you'd say you are, obviously?

Definitely, definitely. Yeah. He was there. He pulled pictures down that were sellotaped on the wall. Jeez, he's a bloody menace. Jeez. Yeah. Oh, well, there you go.

Hey, well, I'm glad it all worked out, and you're going to have a great day. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. I got lost in a huge hole yesterday on National Geographic, and it was an article about how, you know, you might not necessarily have any control over who you're attracted to. Right. And it all comes down to the natural scent of the person.

Producer Taylan, pheromones. Running rife in this studio, aren't theylor uh pheromones running rife in the studio aren't they the pheromones uh have you got a particular smell for marcello that you're like oh that's definitely his odor not necessarily uh cologne or deodorant based yeah i think so yeah especially so this is gonna sound weird but deep even liniment from a warrior play you know is that what they smell like the strongest the strongest scent on males

and females pheromone wise is under the armpit yeah yeah a lot of those people is like people who are attracted to another person

like sort of snuggling into the armpits which what does this what does this studio smell like sort of desperation what do we well the other day it smelled horrible.

I remember me and Joel were talking about it. Oh, there was a dog incident out in the main office. No, when I walk in here, just dead air. I mean, there's no ventilation. Yeah, sort of dusty. The show's died, guys. There's like death in the room. I can smell death.

Old men and death. Dead skin cells. But you do notice it too when a family comes over and you're like, oh, that's the smell of the McCarthy's. The McCarthy's have been, you know? Families en masse have the same. I've never actually, to be honest, I don't know if I've noticed a family smell. Maybe going to someone's house but not if they

come over to our you know my kids would be like the smell of Heineken that's dad but text 4487 if you like you could

describe the smell of your significant other because each person has their own individual odour and it seeps through when you

first meet them apparently when you have a kiss you can taste I wonder if perfume like masks. Yeah, that's your wonder, eh? Cologne, yeah.

Mmm. Yes, this is news or not. Producer Taylor's got three headlines. One of them is faker than a pair of Kardashian lips. Okay, Taylor. Last week we got quite confused by it, didn't we? Yes, so the rules of the game. I don't know why we got so confused. No, didn't we? Yes, so the rules of the game I don't know why we got so confused

No, we've been playing it for a while now But what you do is you find headlines and they could all be real So it makes the game very confusing for us We're very simple, basic people I can't even do live maths on the radio So only one of these is a fake Just to clarify for us And you can play along too

You can text 4487. You can pick out the fake one and we'll give you some hell pizza. All right. Number one. Woman horrified to find out she accidentally performed sexual act on own father whilst at a bachelorette party. That's a... No, I think... Who's...

I think... I feel like this was the thing I read about that didn't actually turn... Well, what's confusing me now is because I think I read about this and this was something that blew up on the internet, but then it turned out it was actually not true. Yeah.

So is it a true story that's a fake? But I don't know now. I've got confused myself. I feel like that's actually a story that's been in a headline. Well, because from my understanding, it was in a closed off area. So I'm like, we, keep that between yourselves.

Lad Bible doesn't need to find out about this. You know, that was my first inkling. Okay, next headline. Teleportation device erected in New York, transporting people from America to London in seconds. Oh, there we go. There's the fake one. Okay.

Well, that feels like the fake one. I'm with you so far. And number three, Apple announces it will phase out standard phone calls by 2030 to make way for exciting new iPhone features, including a surreal FaceTime software. So almost like the teleporting. Yeah. Kind of like. Hologram.

Yes. The hologram. That's the word I was looking for. Okay, so second one. I was just thinking, although we called it out and we mocked Producer Taylor for the time machine,

it could be like a visual experience. Immersive experience where you hop in and then like, oh, you're in London. And it's a clickbait headline. You can text 4487. Which one is the fake one?

What would you do if you hooked up with your dad accidentally? Oh my god. Yeah, I just don't Oh my god. Run away and never see him again. It's a change of name situation isn't it? Ben, what would you do if you hooked up

with Kevin Boyce accidentally? I'm from Bastard Inn, so you know. Options will limit it. Hey, we're open minded. I'm with you John. I'm going to go in the middle one Text 4487 Actually the time machine Oh we've got

Time machine is fake Apparently According to Sonia Alright well that Is actually a true story No Yeah so you're right Jono It is a visual representation

Of what they hope to have built In the next You didn't say that You didn't lick baited Yeah so it's like Futurama. Okay. Well done. Your website got the view.

The fake news story was the Apple one. The phone call isn't going anywhere. Okay. Holograms, probably the future though, isn't it? It is, yeah. Imagine, see how anxious we get about someone FaceTiming us. Imagine it's a hologram just popping up in your bathroom. You're like, hey, mate, what are you up to?

Yeah.