Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Show Highlights: The Conversation Gods Saved Jono!

Episode Date: October 12, 2023

Jono had a genius moment during a random convo Jack Tame and John Campbell are in to make the election somewhat exciting! Ben was embarrassed by a random child... See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits, with the Jono and Ben podcast. Cheers to Dilma, making the world a better tea. And the election, it's happening tomorrow. Your last chance to vote is, well, between now and tomorrow, and we may know tomorrow night, we may not know, which one of the Chris's is going to be the Prime Minister come next week? Oh, let's just pray to the sweet Jesus election gods that someone wins, and it's all over.

I don't even care if it's Freedom New Zealand. Just make sure someone wins and we can all move on. Fiery debate last night was the final leaders debate. And it seemed like Chris Hipkins was coming out firing. He was. I managed to catch a bit of it. But it's really, it's just depressing to watch. Two middle-aged white guys arguing with each other. We had to turn over.

We were going to watch something on TV too. Right. Yeah, it was a lot of bickering. Yeah, a lot of bickering. And maybe you went a bit too far in a lot of people's eyes with this. You've had five cabinet ministers go and depart under your leadership. I think people in the bathhouses shouldn't be throwing stones. None of my MPs beat people up with a bed leg. Oh, is that Sam Uffendale? Yeah, it was referencing something that happened many,

many years ago with one of the national MPs. But it wasn't. Yeah, anyway, it just seemed like there was a muted response in the crowd. A few people clapped and then they came in. Yeah, so it was a bit. Yeah. And then they continued to debate and it felt like Chris Lux had maybe busted out some taylor swift mate listen you need to listen to taylor swift when she says i need you to calm down right that's really important you've got to listen no i'm not going to calm down no i'm not no i tell you what 100 of the time when you tell someone to calm down they never calm down all it does is i can vouch it just inflames the situation. I like a little bit of Taylor Swift

to reference in the debate. That was probably my favourite moment. And a bit of debate as well about how much they spend at the supermarket. Cost of living has been a big topic of conversation. And this is doing the rounds this morning. Christopher Lux and how much he spends at the supermarket surprised many.

How much do you spend a week on food um i spend i'm personally shopping every sunday down in wellington probably about 60 bucks what about you well i live i live by myself a lot more than 60. i live by myself in my apartment in wellington yeah everyone's 60 bucks it's not much really everyone will tell you it's not much but then if he lives by himself and he's not i'm not telling you how much I'm spending at high-end restaurants. That's right. You just asked me at the supermarket. I'm eating out every night.

Fine dining, baby. Yeah, that could be one of their options. So, yeah, tomorrow we'll know it is election day. Yeah, and our leaders debate. Ben, I think we have the honour of hosting the final leaders debate. Oh, yes. This will be the last. TVNZ won that. Jess at Much Mackay was out there. She was going, this is the last one, you know. This will be the last. Everyone, TVNZ won that.

Jess at Much Mackay was out there. She was going, this is the last one, you know, the last chance to impress you. No, no, we've got the last chance to impress you. After eight o'clock this morning, that'll be happening. But if you want us to recap what's happened, to get you up to speed so you know exactly who to vote for tomorrow or not,

we'll just recap on some of your favourite moments from the debate. Yeah, we have wrapped up the election campaign. And rest assured that this song will definitely not bring you up to speed with what's been happening. Welcome to the coalition no one asked for. Jono and Ben and a rap. To clarify, the rap bit's spelt R-A-P, not W-R-A-P. Yeah, I think we got that.

One's name, Luxon. One's name, Hopkins. There's a grumpy old guy.P. not W.R.A.P. Yeah, I think we got that. One's name, Luxon. One's name, Hipkins. There's a grumpy old guy. His name's, Winston. On the way to the voting polls. Hipkins ate pies and sausage rolls. Bro, Woody Waititi said he thought he'd been in opposition since 1840. Paddy Gower asked the leaders what they had to say.

Have either of you done MDMA? Guy Williams went and asked, Luxon next. What's your favourite dinosaur? T-Rex. James Shaw and the Greens want carbon zero and he told Seymour. Oh David, you know I'm starting to realise that the people who can tolerate you are the real heroes. Luxon got heckled by a stand-by and he zinged him back. You're a real funny guy. Winston thinks Jack Tame is an annoyer and for some weird reason calls him a Philadelphia lawyer. Whether you're team green, pink, blue or red, you should

go vote and spread their legs. There we go. That took us way too long. And hopefully it brought you up to speed with what's been happening. Now get out and vote tomorrow. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Now, I had a moment last night where I was out with the family.

We were walking on a street, and this guy went, oh, hey, Jono and Ben, which is often what people will say to us, you know, because no one even knows which one of me is which. He was with his family. He's like, can I get a photo? And I was like, yeah, sure. It doesn't happen very often. But I was like, sweet, I i get a photo and i was like yes sure it doesn't happen very often uh but i was like sweet i'll get a photo look at this and so his uh his mate took a photo

and his mate was still looking after his kid who was probably five or six years old she was standing there and she was looking up at her father just a bit confused what's this what is this interaction that's playing out in front of me looking at me looking at him like that and then she just went as was just about who are you it's a fair question too i was like i tried to ignore it because i'm about to smile for a photo she's like who are you you're like shut up kid shut up smiling through your teeth just smiling you're loud when you're talking to a photo she's oh just a tv show you know we did tv show Radio show John I'll be Who are you Yeah but I was like Oh this kid is just relentless

So the good thing about kids Is they haven't developed The function to worry About people's feelings No I was like oh You know we just had this thing We did the radio

She's like yeah but Who are you It's like To be fair to the kid She was probably like Negative two When Oh yeah

She had no idea I didn't expect her to but i was just like well you don't obviously know but it just i can feel myself just you should have really you should have really thrown her and gone i'm your real dad that would have been a great goal that would have settled the dust who's having the best weekend yeah we'd like to know who's having the best weekend and we want to hear from you on 0800 The Hits, and we've got a double pass to Symphony in the Domain. We'll tell you more about that shortly, but 0800 The Hits, if you want to tell us why you're having the best weekend.

And if you thought Luxton and Hipkins were going at it, there's some bad blood between them. Well, that's nothing on the weekly debate that rages on between Connor from The Hits in Canterbury and Hayley from The Hits in Wellington, from the North and South. Now, we'll get Hayley on first this morning. Congratulations. You already had a win yesterday at the staff meeting.

Thank you. Taking out the hits employee of the month. Yes. I'm just intrigued by Symphony and the domain and the tickets because Connor and I have been trying to get these every week for months and months and don't seem to be winning. Well, your weekend's not quite as good as the listeners on 100 The Hits.

You just tell us what's happening. You don't actually go to a lot of these events. No, I don't have time for that. I've got two what I would say now are classic events that between them have been around for over half a century. We have

in Avondale at the Hollywood Cinema for 24 years, right, every year, they have this 24-hour movie marathon. So it runs through the night. They have a dinner and a breakfast break, but you can watch 12 to 14 movies back to back. That's a good idea. What, for free?

I doubt it's for free. Yeah, the cost of living. It's definitely not going to be free. They're trying to make money at the movie theatre. But hey, that's a good thing to do, sit in a movie. Longest time you've spent in a movie theatre, Ben, would probably be that Ryan Reynolds thing we did. Yeah, we watched the trailer non-stop of Deadpool 2 for 30 hours

in the hope that he'd video call us. And he did, eventually, after 30 hours of everyone pestering him on the internet. I can't believe you guys. Did you fall asleep during that? Yeah, we did. We had a sleep. We didn't have to stay awake the whole time. We just lived in there.

You could sleep through one of Ryan's films with this and then have a wee nap. If you thought movie theatres were gross on a normal day, imagine us living in it for 24 hours. Okay, so that's happening. The movie marathon. What else, Hayley? And then in Hawke's Bay, they have the Waipara Spring Festival. This has been

running for 28 years, and they have Duck Day. You may have seen photos before in the news and things, but they have 1,500 little yellow rubber ducks that everyone buys the duck, and they race them down Waipara River, and there are prizes. It's a gorgeous river, and it's

just a super fun day that's been going for 28 years. Oh, that sounds adorable. I hope they leave those little plastic ducks in the river as well. No, I'm sure I'll take them out. Many fish float after the event. That's a great event. Okay, two old school events in the north from Hayley.

We'll go to the South Connors in Christchurch. Hot competition, Connor. Yeah, no, nothing really too much to worry about there, let's be honest here, guys. Closing day for Mount Hutt today, though. They've had to close early. The weekend's weather's not looking great, but it's a big day if you're keen to get along.

First tracks at 8am open to everyone. It's also retro day, so you dig into the back of your cupboard, find that 80s onesie that you might have hiding away. I feel like I can see you, Jono, with a sweatband around your head, a lovely purple and blue onesie and a pair of skis that your dad used to ride down a ski field somewhere in the North Island. Retro, so you have to go up on the mountain in retro clothing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and most of the time they end up ripping.

They've also got the pond skim, which is essentially, and it's for people who are good at skiing and snowboarding, they come down the hill at just extreme velocity to make up for the fact that they're going to be hitting a pond and they have to skim across the pond from one side to the other at Mount Hutt.

They've checked out at Mount Hutt. They basically just come up here and do whatever you want. Pretty much, pretty much. What else in the South, Connor? Oktoberfest has made its way to Queenstown. It's one day only tomorrow, and actually, considering Mount Hutt is closing today, Remarkables and then just up the road,

Kadrona will be the only ski fields, I think, left open in the country. There might be one somewhere else. But you can go for a ski up the mountain, then chuck your suspenders on, head to Searchlight Brewery for some steins. They've got live music, food carts, pizzas, prizes for best dressed, and then, of course, multiple German beers in there as well.

There we go. Connor is a very snow-heavy event on this weekend in the South Island. Who's going to win, Ben? Let's bring them back on. We've had Connor Haley. Factoring in, Haley's already won a $50 voucher as being the HITS employee. Yeah, but then she also got

bullied because she hadn't won many of these. So I'm going to give it to Haley this week. Well done, Haley. You're having the best weekend in the North. I thought I'd lost you with his use of the big word velocity. Hey, good on you both. Thank you so much for your time. Have a great weekend.

You too. Dogs, dogs, dogs. Undies. You know I can't grab your fish chips. Nip my nut. Friday. Flashback. It is a Friday and we like to look back at something iconic every Friday from yesteryear in New Zealand.

And with the election tomorrow, it seemed fitting to look back at one of the most iconic election moments we've ever had in this country. And you wouldn't get any more New Zealand moments than this. Now, I think it was the 80s that this took place in New Zealand politics. Muldoon, Rob Muldoon, former prime minister. He emerged from a meeting and he looked very intoxicated, very intoxicated. And he called a snap election on the spot. And he had the look of a man, you know, one of those people kind of like trying to smile and keep your face looking sober, but then all you end up doing is this weirdly sort of smirking and smiling

with glassy glazed over eyes as he's being hit up by the reporters. Have a listen to this. On June 14, he drunkenly announced to a startled country there would be a snap election. Have we got a date, Prime Minister? We've got a date, the 14th of July, which we've worked out at Government House as being the appropriate date. That doesn't give you much time to run up to an election, Prime Minister. Doesn't give my opponents much time to run up to an election, Prime Minister. It doesn't give my opponents much time to run up

to an election, does it? It's just as always. It's just as always. I don't know that shit, do I? Elections are hard words to say to you. Hard to nail

when you're sober, election, but let alone after ten whiskeys. It's definitely me when I've had a couple of drinks in the afternoon and you go home and you're like,

but ten you like, you know, that's it. Cork family. And you smile with a sedated smile. Or you run into a friend of one of the kids' parents you've never met before, you've had a few beers, and you're like, I really tried. How are you going? But I hadn't heard this part.

There was follow-on questions. So the poor guy's having to also answer the barrage of questions that come up. Obviously there's going to be a lot of questions asked when you call a snap election. You can't govern without an effective, assured majority. And it's

not the numbers in the House or the people in the House. It's the people out there. The New Zealand people. If they want me to lead a government, they'll vote accordingly. If they want that other bloke to lead a government, they'll vote for him. That's about it.

That's it. That's it. It sounds like you're talking to your uncle at the end of a family wedding. About 11.30, there you go, Rob Muldoon calling a snap election. Do you reckon he, you know, he woke up the next morning and went, Dear God,uldoon calling a snap election do you reckon he you know he woke up the next morning and went dear God

did I call a snap election last night maybe it wasn't planned that's for sure the Jono and Ben podcast of course the election is tomorrow and all the coverage

is on TVNZ1 and joining us from there is Jack Tame and John Campbell Jono Jono and Ben hey

good to see you. This Saturday night, the election's on. One News, your vote's special. You guys are hosting. John, you've been doing this since 1999 you have been hosting elections. That's so sweet you know that. Yeah. Yeah, 1999.

How's that? Every election since 1999. Yeah, truly. This is my ninth, I think, in the studio. And before that, I was in the field. I was a young reporter in the field. Yeah, truly. This is, yeah, so this is my ninth, I think, in the studio. Wow. And before that, I was in the field. I was a young reporter

in the field. Yeah. Yeah, I love it. I absolutely love it. Well, they send you to like Twizel. And you wait for your turn. They cross live to you.

They said they were going to come to me soon. Come on. I'm ready in Twizel. Now, you both, you know, you follow politics. You know a lot about politics.

Is this like your Taylor Swift era's concert? Is this like your Taylor Swift era's concert Is this like your Rugby World Cup When it comes to politics The election It is for you No it is for both of us

Right But I mean especially for you You have been fizzing About this for ages Yeah I love Absolutely love it And what You know

Can I say something To your listeners Get out and vote Yeah Because you know Graham Hart is New Zealand's Richest man Right he's one of the

Thousand richest men On the planet He gets one of the thousand richest men on the planet. He gets one vote. You know, your poorest, youngest listener gets one vote. You know, that is a magnificent thing about democracy. So please get out and use it. Yeah, that's a very important message. And Jack, what I have been enjoying, you've been doing some wonderful work leading into

the election. And a beautiful are they, will they, won't they relationship with Winston Peters. When you first met him, you got your name wrong for half the interview, it was James for a while wasn't it? It was James for a while the worst bit of the whole thing when you have an interview like that, it's as soon as you throw to the ad break afterwards

and you're like, what do I say I was going to ask that, what happens afterwards the other day I just went whoo like that, and It's just, the other day I just went whoo! Like that. And then he just, he was like speaking under his breath as he walked out, but it was fine. So does he say goodbye, thank you, nothing to walk off?

I don't know, there was a thank you the other day. He called you a Philadelphia lawyer many times, which is actually quite a compliment. I don't know what it meant, but I was looking it up. Describes a lawyer who's detailed, points of the law, minute, competent lawyer i know it was i was i was delighted i think that was a compliment i'm not sure that dirt merchant was he also called me the dirt merchant i'd get a t-shirt printed if i was you like a little card in the dirt industry

now john has this been been an exciting campaign? I don't know. Look, I'm speaking personally. I'm not speaking on anyone else's behalf, but I found it a little bit disappointing. And also, to be frank, two middle-aged white guys called Chris having a go at each other. I know it's 2023. I mean, some of us may vote for slightly better than that, but it is what it is. And, you know, people say you get the governments you deserve.

So if you don't like that, get out and vote. And if you do like that, get out and vote. Do you think we'll get a result? Like, I know it's quite hard to predict. In every poll every second day, there's a slightly different result. Do you think Saturday night we might walk away with a result? Or is it still too hard to tell? I reckon we'll get the general sense of a result.

But I reckon it'll take some time to form a government. And I have nothing really to base it on except for vibes. But yeah, I mean, I think we'll know which the biggest party is. I think we'll know the likely party or parties that are going to help them out to form a government, but I think it'll take some time before we have it finalised.

I was reading an article yesterday, John, about yourself talking about elections, and often they'll try to get you to call the result. Yes. And, you know, producers will be in your ear, go, call it, call it. You're like, not yet. I never thought that would be part of the thing you'd have to do. to call the result. Yes. And, you know, producers will be in your ear going, call it, call it. You're like, not yet. I never thought that would be part of the thing you'd have to do.

Do they do that? Yeah, yeah, they do. Do they do that? Yeah, yeah, well, TV3. Because, you know, TV3 really wants to be, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've all worked there, right? It was the Wild West.

John was calling election results at four in the afternoon. Parties that didn't exist. Legalised cannabis. I'll tell you right. They've taken it out. I'm calling it now. I honestly think they honestly didn't have an HR department until about three years ago. The pressure goes on.

But last, because Labour won, it was the only MMP election in which a party's got an absolute majority. They didn't need a coalition or support partner, right? We knew by about, from memory, about a 704, wasn't it? It was a long night. It was like the Melbourne Cup and all the other horses had died. Drag it out for five hours. Jack Tame, John Campbell, you know a lot more.

So Saturday night, very exciting. It made me a lot more excited about it. You have? Yeah, yeah. You've got us frosted up. Have you boys, don't tell me who, I more. So Saturday night, very exciting. It made me a lot more excited about it. You have? Yeah, yeah. You've got to swirl it up. Have you boys, don't tell me who, I don't want to know, but have you both voted? I haven't yet.

I like to do it on the day. I do. I do it on the day. I take the kids along in any way and just feel like it's part of, you know, I don't think they're interested in it at all, but you take them along and show them what it's about. You know my parents, Annie and John Pryor, they don't tell each other who they vote for.

Their whole marriage. Still. Still don't tell each other who they vote for. Their whole marriage. Still. Still don't know. No. And they sway between who they think can run the country appropriately. My dad's the same. He refuses to have to tell anyone who he votes for. But of course, we all know exactly who he votes for because he's constantly raging against

everyone else. Yeah, like it's ridiculous. Yeah, yeah. You're only keeping us guessing, Bob. John Campbell, Jack Tame. Hey, thank you very much for coming in. Lovely to see you both. John, I've been lovely to see you. Yeah, thanks. You're really keeping us guessing, Bob. John Campbell, Jack Tame. Hey, thank you very much for coming in. Lovely to see you both. Jono and Ben, lovely to see you.

Thanks, guys. Keep up your good work. The Hits, the Jono and Ben podcast. Ben, something happened to me yesterday, and I would say maybe a once or twice in a lifetime event where you engage in a conversation with someone and you spend the majority of the time going, dear God, what is this person's name?

You've been there before? Oh, multiple times. someone and you spend the majority of the time going dear god what is this person's name you've been there before oh multiple times yeah you you've been in a situation where they've gone you don't remember my name do you what's my name haven't you you've been in that situation we'll go you're good to see you and they'll go yeah we met thing and i'll go yeah i remember and then they'll go well where from what's my name and i'm like why would you why would you why would you do this to me you know the answer with me going yeah i remember just play the game i remember the incident but i don't remember there's no deep down he doesn't remember but just be polite about it yeah uh but yeah for the first

half of this conversation i'm not even focusing on what we're saying back and forth to each other my mouth's moving i might not have even been saying the correct things back to this person because i'm just going what is their name what is their name then all of a sudden the conversation gods fell down upon me and i won't i won't say their real name but we'll just go it's clarissa the name is clarissa and then so she she hadn't said it you just said no it just popped into my head and geez you are just what you're then having to do is play a very fine line of not appearing like you've just remembered their name and then chucking it but you want it you want to chuck it in there yeah you want to go oh is that right

clarissa oh clarissa listen i haven't seen you know and just midway through the conversation you suddenly saying christmas it's gone from mate hey mate how are you yeah so it's a delicate balance isn't it for them not to realize that you've just remembered their name i had the one the other day i was telling you about where the guy got my name wrong he kept calling me in that's right and he'll go you know in you know and i keep going oh and he's called he's gonna go away later and go oh god i was calling that guy in so i thought i'd help him out by starting to say my name back into the conversation. Like I was saying, oh, you know, I was

saying to myself this morning, you know, Ben, you need to get out there and do it. You know, I kept going. People come up and say, Ben, you gotta... And he didn't pick up on that. He didn't quite pick up. I kept calling you Ian. Seven hours of Ian. You're like, isn't my name actually Ben? I try to turn the tide on his Ian.