Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - Show Highlights: Wind Up Your Wife Wednesdays!

Episode Date: August 29, 2023

Jono looks back at his horrific prank calls Big time power plays Ben's crocs! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Hits with the Jono and Ben podcast. Thanks to Challenge, putting the service back into service stations. Molly Soros' mum, Trish, got remarried the other day to a guy off Prison Break. The brother, if you've ever watched Prison Break. The older dude. Yeah, real musty dude. She married, Tish, isn't it? Yeah, Tish, yeah, she got remarried, obviously no longer with Billy Ray. Got out of prison, obviously.

Yeah, well, yeah., obviously no longer with Billy Ray. Yeah, but it was a cute show. Got out of prison, obviously. Yeah, well, yeah. Likes the inmates, eh? It was not really a real show, but yeah, it was a fascinating show, that one. Yeah, well, when it first came out, you're like, this is so clever that he's gone in there and tattooed the plans of, well, listen, if you've seen Prison Break, I'm not going to mansplain it to you. But it was such a clever premise, and the first season was incredible, and then you're like, oh, guys, you can't keep getting sent back to prison.

Because they got out, and they got on the run. And then the third series, they're like, we're going to get them back into prison because the show's called Prison Break. We have a whole series where we haven't broken out of prison. They'd lost me by that point. I stuck with it. Did you watch all the seasons? Yeah, I did, actually, yeah.

It was really a very clever premise. It was. Wentworth Miller, he was the actor, wasn't he? He was, yeah. And he's in a Mariah Carey video as well. Oh, I didn't know seasons. Yeah, I did actually, yeah. It was really a very clever premise. Yeah, it was. Wentworth Miller. He was the actor, wasn't he? He was, yeah. And he's in a Mariah Carey video as well. Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah. Prison Break was huge.

It was a massive show. It wasn't. And just so you know, if you're thinking of tattooing the plans of Primero on your body, it's not going to work. No, it wouldn't be. In reality. No.

Tattooing the plans of a prison. How did he get all the plans? Shocking for the makeup department on that show too. Like, oh, now every time he's got his shirt off, we've got to. Of course, they'd have to draw the. And I see did throughout the, I used to wear a lot of long sleeve shirts. And all sorts of weather. We were like, just put on a long sleeve shirt.

We are not spending nine hours every day tattooing the prison plans on um hey well speaking of all things prisons and stuff i know it's a hot topic at the moment heading into the election isn't it crime and punishment all the politicians they come out don't they swinging around we're gonna throw away the key lock them up um well speaking of politicians ben this has been bouncing. One heck of a segue. Bouncing. Do I really need that whole crime thing or is this just... Bouncing from that to Chloe Swarbrick. She's a politician. Yes, she is.

Yeah, you're right. Now, ran into her the other night, we did, and we were talking with her and she was very friendly. Lovely lady, Chloe. Yeah, but from the Green Party. Yeah. And she's always so friendly, very generous with her time. And we were talking away, and this guy with a mullet comes up.

And it doesn't say much. He just shoves a can of bourbon in one of her hands and says, hold this. And then he puts a phone in her other hand. And then he wraps his arm around me and he's like, take a selfie. This is Klobuchar. Klobuchar, respected member of parliament.

And again, like I said, she's a lovely human being. So she happily obliged, but she was laughing. She was laughing a lot because this guy had no idea who she was and the respect that he should be giving to her. And it just made me think as it was happening, Baria Aotearoa, New Zealand, what a country. You know, what a country where a member of parliament holds a can of bourbon and a guy in a Bogan's phone

and takes a selfie of a low-level broadcaster. That's not happening anywhere else in the world. No, you're right. You're right. So yeah, shout out to Chloe. And she found, she was crying with laughter afterwards.

Found the funny side. The hits. The Jono and Ben podcast. You said you were going to divide the audience with those controversial views on immigration. So here we go.

No, yesterday, I had a birthday yesterday, which I don't like to talk about. You know, like I don't, trying to pretend. I think I like a lot of people pretend it's not happening.

Yeah. But obviously your family, they like to make you know like i don't trying to pretend i think i like a lot of people pretend it's not happening yeah obviously your family they they like to make a thing yeah i uh every time it's your birthday i text you and it's like i don't want to say it publicly like it's some sort of i appreciate a fear we're having behind your back you know i just kind of like it's another you know the kids my kids get so excited about birthdays i get what you're saying yeah you know for people two people who are in an industry where they like to make it all about themselves, ironically, both of us hate the one day that you can make it all about yourself. But, you know, the family got me a present, the kids got me a present, and this is going to divide the room because I'm going to get it out right now. As in?

Mate. Mate, I'm holding up. It's happened, guys. It's up. It's happened, guys. It's happened. It's happened. Here you go. A pair of Crocs. He's got some Crocs.

And not just Crocs, but Crocs that have come with gibbets or Crocs charms. They're already charmed up. Come in here. Taylor's just come in from the office. Look what he's got for his birthday. Crocs. This is what I got

for the family as well. Already good to go, mate. They've got Lakers, they've got Simpsons, they've got my name on it as well. I wore them out last night because we had dinner

and I was like, geez, am I? Can I? Don't look like I'm trying to be like a teenager or something like that. Taylor, your thoughts? Are you trying to be Justin Bieber? Yeah. Well that. Taylor, your thoughts? Are you trying to be Justin Bieber?

Yeah. Well, I mean, just two weeks ago you were like, can I wear my hat backwards? And you're shaky on that, but he's really levelled up to Crocs. I've got Crocs full of charms on them as well, so there you go. So I'm just going to divide the audience. Can we get a photo and put it up on the Hits Breakfast?

Proud owner of Crocs. Well, I don't know if I'm a proud owner, I'm a tentative owner of Crocs. I don't know how I feel about them in public. I don't know if they're appropriate for the workplace. I wore other shoes this morning. You know what? It's a surefire sign you're not ready to wear Crocs. They actually don't even look that bad on you.

They actually don't. You're pulling them off. We'll see. We'll see. We'll put them up on social media. They don't look bad on your feet. It's just when you look at the rest of the body and see how old the guy is. You're like, oh, oh, oh, really?

Anyway, that's it. Text 4487. Can he rock crocs? Jonas Internet Wormhole. Uh-oh. He spent a good part of 35 minutes lost on the internet again. Forgot to pick the kids up from school, Ben. It's the internet wormhole.

And I thought, given the best song ever, we are at the, as our boss Matt pointed out, in an electronic mail at the pointy end of the competition. We're doing that after 8 o'clock, the best song ever. And just the most popular song lyrics ever written in the world. Now, they surveyed over 5,000 people internationally. And these are, so look at these, they might not necessarily be the best song lyrics but certainly the most well known. Ah, okay.

So number five, Queen. Oh yeah, very well known lyrics. Internationally. Yeah. I think it pretty much spans the generations, the song My Son. I think most babies, even when they're still covered in amniotic fluid on the birthing table, they start singing the song. Everyone knows it.

Well, every time someone wins a title or something, you know, a championship, this is the song they'll blast out over the ground. So you're right. The only part of that song that I'm a bit questionable on is No Time for Losers. They're not even giving full credit to the other team. No Time for Losers, mate. We're a bunch of losers. other team. No Time for Losers. No Time for Losers, mate. We're a bunch of losers. All right.

What's that, number four? That's number five. Number four, though, is A Long Way to the Top, AC Dinkins. It's a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll. The fourth most popular song there, A Long Way to the Top, if you want to rock and roll. You always put me off rock and rolling. It's a long way to the top. It's going to take me a while.

Just in case if you want to know, it's a very short way to the bottom if you want to take me a while just in case if you want to know it's a very short way to the bottom if you want a radio announce yeah that's right okay number three what's the most I love this one

this is from the Muppets what no that'd be great third most well known lyric not many lyrics

in this one they can write A hell of a song Yeah I love that Okay You can go anywhere In the world And you can start

That and someone Would finish that off Number two Lose yourself M&M The beginning part Everyone knows This little bit.

What you capture. What you capture. Yeah, okay. Or let it slip. Or just let it slip. Now we've had many opportunities over the years, Ben. Do you think you've captured them or have you let them slip? Yeah, probably let them slip, to be honest.

In the slip category? Yeah. Yeah, there we go. And the number one, Michael Jackson. Most popular song lyric. I need a bit of cheese at my love. Cheers. Cheers. Michael Jackson. Most popular song lyric. Tune. Tune.

Yeah, Billie Jean's not my lover. She's just a girl who claims that Michael Jackson was the one. There's a few other people that claim things too. A few other claimants out there. Let's not go into that. So that is the most what? The most popular lyrics. Most well-known lyrics internationally. The top five.

So there you go. The hits. The Jon-known lyrics internationally. The top five. So there you go. The Hits. The Jono and Ben Podcast. Now, yesterday at the petrol station, Ben, I tried to pull an ultimate power play in front of a long line of people, sort of four to five people waiting in line to pay for their petrol.

Now, I had to just go pick up some milk and bread from the petrol station. I had a crisp Kate pick up some milk and bread from the petrol station. I had a crisp Kate Shepard beautiful $10 note. And picked up the items without really looking at the prices and I was, oh I'll get a chocolate bar as well.

Threw the items in, they got them scanned and I placed down the $10 note. And I said something that I've always wanted to say. Don't worry, mate. You keep the change. And I did it loud, too, so people could hear. And they're like, geez, this guy's generosity is pouring out more than those petrol pumps out on that forecourt. Very generous.

I didn't even want acknowledgement. Just turned around. Well, I probably did. But turned around, walked away with my items. And then I got the, excuse me, sir. Oh. Excuse me, sir. And I was like, he's going to try and say

no no you've got to keep your change it's company protocol or photo something something like that photo with a local hero that sort of thing Ben you still owe me $2.40 so I was going to say as it came through I was like oh service station maybe you know prices

so it's gone from me going oh there's spare change there you know treat yourself buy something nice for the wife me going, oh, there's spare change there. You know, treat yourself. Buy something nice for the wife and kids sort of situation. To you owe me $240. And then I didn't have $240 on me. So I had to go, I was like, hold on. I have to go get my EFOS card from the car. All these people were waiting in line.

Had to go and, sorry, sorry, sorry. Then pay the, hmm. Tried to pull a power play and I'm not a power play person. No, I'm not very good at the power play either. Humbling. Some people love a power play, don't they? We've been in a couple of meetings with one with an Aussie guy. Came in.

Jeez, he was a powerful guy, wasn't he? This Aussie guy. Oh, yeah. Do you remember him? Feet on the desk. That's a power play. Arms behind his head. Yeah.

He's like, who's taking the notes? You take the notes. He waved his hand at someone who was like... Well, I guess I could take's taking the notes You take the notes Waved his hand At someone who was like Well I guess I could Take the notes You could take the notes Just so I was like Oof

Because you know The power was dripping Off this individual too I had Father-in-law Come around to My place And he had a power play

Where he took the remote Our remote Like he was like Oh hang on I can't remember I was watching something And he was like And he grabbed it

And he changed it And I was like You were mid-watch too I was like Oh Oh And hang on. I can't remember when I was watching something. And he was like, oh. And he grabbed it and he changed it. And I was like, oh. You were mid-watch too. I was like, oh, oh. And then it got, he changed it over. And then mid-ads, another power play muted the ads. And I was like, oh. He's really taking control of the entertainment in the ads.

I don't know how I felt about this. But he knows you're not going to say anything. And that is why the power play, people who can pull off a power play, they know. They know that people nine times out of ten aren't going to react. And I didn't. Not until now I can talk about it now. So this is what we want to chuck open on 0800 The Hits.

Have you experienced a power play recently? Another good one is I witnessed this. Someone in the workplace was like, oh, can you help open the jar for me? Just in the kitchen out there. Someone came along along and they were also struggling with the jar then a third party mooch is in give it here boom pops the lid off without even any effort and hands it walks away without a word said just simultaneously crapping over two people at the same time. Under the hits of 4-4-8-7. We're talking power play is champ. People that call you champ, I feel like, is a power play.

It winds you up, doesn't it? I'm not a champ. No. I'm not a champ. I'm not going to say you are. I'm just going to agree. Israel Alessandria. If I'm talking to him, I could go,

G'day, champ. How you doing? Because he's a champion. And he acts like a champion. I don't act like a champ. I'm very unconfident at a pair of Crocs right now. I'm not, g'day champ, how you doing? Because he's a champion. And he acts like a champion. Yeah, I don't act like a champ. I'm very unconfident in a pair of Crocs right now. I'm not a champ. Very self-conscious right now.

People are looking at my feet. Everyone's going, yeah. So anyway, yeah. So that's how not a champ I am. Yeah, not a power play team, are we? But some great texts coming through on 4487. Guys, I was at a bar last week. Very busy bar.

The bartender was spending a lot of time focused on talking to a girl across the bar from him. Ignoring everyone else. My girlfriend went in because no one was getting served. She grabbed my empty glass, filled up the beer from the tap behind the bartender's back. Whoa. Power play. That's a power play. Thank you very much.

Michaela, good morning. Hey, how's it going? We're doing really well. Lovely to have you on. Talking power plays this morning. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had experienced that a bit. With who? So, I have our mother-in-law with us and whenever she is with us,

she just immediately jumps in the front seat of the car, even if it's my car and my husband is driving. I just get demoted to the back seat, never a question, never a look back. I mean, granted, she is a lot older than me, and it would be pretty rude of me to kick her out. But there's no conversation that's had beforehand. No, I just want the, you know, know, would you like to sit in the front? But I never get it.

It's a big swing, isn't it? Just jumping in the front. We're the same. We used to work with Sharon for a couple of years on the Edge radio station, good friend of ours, and she would always go, I sit in the front because I get car sick. That was her thing. I was like, well, there's no negotiation.

What happens if I get car sick as well? She was just like, no, that's where I sit. But yeah, so your mother-in-law in the same category. How does this make your husband feel? Well, he's actually really good. He will say to me, look, babe, if you want me to kick her in the back,

I totally will. I'm happy to tell her to get back there. But what's funny is that his brother has done the same thing as well. Oh, his brother has done the same thing as well. Oh, his brother jumps in the front seat? Yeah, yeah. If he's with us, he too just jumps straight in the front seat as well and doesn't even offer it to me, even if it's my own vehicle. I mean, you've got to do that.

Are you okay in the back, just as a courtesy thing, even if you're not listening to what their answer's going to be? Are you sure you're all right in the back, Anna? What sort of car have you got there? Like, I have a little Nissan Tita, so it's pretty small. I'm pretty tall. I'm jammed in the back with the kids, but...

Yeah, there's not much. Look, there's the back of a Tita, Ben. You're not dealing with much room, but, I mean, it would be monstrous of you to shove a 90-year-old woman in the back of that, though. Absolutely. Like, I would be the nanny if I did. Oh, Michaela, we appreciate you sharing that story with us.

Thanks, guys. See you, mate. Guys went fishing with my friend's father. We stopped at the bakery on the way out. I said, would you like anything from the bakery? He was adamant, no. Out on the water, I got myself a sandwich.

He took the sandwich out of my bag and ate my sandwich. What? So he ate the guy's sandwich after not wanting any. That is powerful. That is a power play. That is very powerful. Another one here. If someone starts getting loud and rude with me,

all I do is I take half a step forward slightly into their space. Makes them very uncomfortable and it calms down the situation. Here we go. Some great power plays coming through there too. Oh, a great one here i was at a party my friend got downtrout in front of everyone didn't flinch didn't just keep talking the hits the jonathan ben podcast i remember a few years ago there was a clip that went viral from the bbc over there in england where a guy was very bamboozled on a live news interview.

It turns out that he was actually just turning up for a job interview in IT at the BBC. I remember this clip. It brought us so much joy back in the day. And he looked so confused that he was in the middle of a news show. What was he being interviewed about? Apple had a big court case over there as well. And the verdict was surprising and he was brought along. I think he was just thinking while he was there for an interview, suddenly he's on

live TV being asked about this court case and he was as confused as you would be. Hello, good morning to you. Good morning. Were you surprised by this verdict today? I'm very surprised to see this verdict to come on me because I was not expecting that. When I came they told me something else and I'm coming. You got an interview, so it's a big surprise anyway. A big surprise. Exactly. Yeah.

It was a big surprise, wasn't it? He's doing a good job of saying silly but saying nothing at the same time. But it was, it was very surprised, it was. But you just sometimes, I was thinking about you sometimes just go along with stuff because it is kind of easier in the same time. But he was. He was very surprised. It was. But you just sometimes, I was thinking about you, sometimes just go along with stuff because it is kind of easier in the long run. Now, this is back in the news, that particular guy,

because they've made a lot of money out of the clip that's gone viral and he's like, I haven't seen a cent. I'm very surprised. Did he get the job in the end because he was going for a job? Maybe he didn't get the job either.

We should close the loop on that one. So that's why it's back out in the news at the moment. But it made me think that we, the two of us, from time to time, it's just easier to go along with stuff yeah right you know about you know back in the day we both have worked with other duos you know a part of other duos back in the day you know whether it's me on pop sport with bill or you with the robert and john on the rock and sometimes people will come up to us and they'll go individually they'll go oh that was classic when you did that thing. And you're like, oh, that was, oh, that was.

And you end up in a conversation. And after a while, you just go, oh, yeah, it was me that I did the wind up. It happened the other day. We were in a meeting. The lady's like, I remember when you came and you hosted that thing that we had David Beckham here. And I was like, oh, no, that wasn't. And then halfway through, I'm like, oh, what does it matter?

In the grand scheme of things. I mean, you've got your idea of what happened. Oh, Beckham was, and I remember that. It was on me. Beckham wasn't happy with one of the jokes. You're like, oh, yeah. I'm just playing along. Yeah, no, no, he was, so Golden Balls was, whew.

He was steamed up. But yeah, it's just easier to, the path of least resistance, isn't it? I had the same in the weekend. Someone came up to me and going, oh, you got my wife a good one with Wind Up Your Wife and I was like oh I did a couple of those

on the rock radio station that was a prank call segment that you used to do but I was like I don't think this particular one was me but they were in the middle of the conversation

they were going they were talking about all the things that happened I just had to go oh that was that was hard case just going I don't

I don't it wasn't me listen Why Don't Your Wife was definitely like it hasn't aged well no it was basically a period of time where we just traumatized listeners it started off winding up listeners wives on the right and then just turned into just like attacking everyone so people would sit up there originally their partners and say oh this has happened you should wind them up over this, right?

And then at the end of it, after you'd put them through the ringer, you'd go, oh, here's 500 bucks. Hush, buddy. Don't say a bad word about us. Don't take us to the Broadcasting Standards Authority. And, you know, it was at a time where you could traumatise people.

Now we're all worried about feelings. I found a clip just before the show of this. I don't even know what this was, but it sounds horrific. Now, bearing in mind, it hasn't aged well, okay? He's not listening to me. Okay, okay. Well, hand the phone over and I'll have a word with him, okay?

Josh? Josh, can you just take the phone, please? Yep. It's Robert and Jono from the Rock Radio Station here. What? You've been had for Wind Up Your Wife Wednesday, buddy. Seriously?

Oh, I'm not cool, guys. Are you okay, mate? Oh, I'm not happy, mate. Jesus. You guys are stuck to a new low now, man. Sorry. So at the end of that one, it wasn't all like, oh, yeah, you've are stuck to a new low now, man. So at the end of that one, it wasn't all like, oh, yeah, you got me good.

It was just like, oh, the poor guy's like... And then we're like, 500 bucks. He's like, well, that's not really much consolation. And then we put it on the radio. And we put that on the radio. And now I have to go along with being part of that. You're dragged into this.