Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - The BEST story ever told!

Episode Date: June 4, 2024

Welcome to the untamed realm of the world's Wild Wild Web!  On this edition we discuss the best story ever told on the Grahm Norton show. It's a MUST listen! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On today's Wild Wild Web, is this the best story ever told on Graham Norton? Welcome to the untamed realm of the World Wide Web. A swirling vortex of weirdness, bullying and self-obsessed social media posts. In this digital jungle, Jono and Vienna are your fearless guides. Leading you through the wildest parts of the Wild Wild Web. This is the wild, wild web. Welcome to another edition of the wild, wild web where we look for something that's come across us. Is that right? Come across us?

Yeah, come across us. Oh, you've come across us? Yeah, we've come across us. Yeah, this is something that's been sent to me by my wife. I feel like a lot of relationships, whether they're, you know, just professional as well, you know, friendship relationships, it doesn't have to be in partners, just sending each other memes and funny stuff.

Absolutely. You know, I've got Instagram. Jono, you're a great culprit for that. I bombard people. And now I'm like, well, no one gives me any acknowledgement on Instagram. When I forward, you know,

videos to you, yes, Megan, yes, you do. You do. But sometimes I now go copy link and text it to make sure they actually see it. And still I don't get a, huh? Just some sort of, ha, ha. So my wife sent me this one a while ago. This is from Graham Norton.

And then she was like, did you watch it? And I was like, oh, no, I hadn't got around to watching it. She was like, oh, it's really good. I thought you'd enjoy it. Life is busy. And actually when I did take the time to watch it was, I don't got around to watching it. It's really good. I thought you'd enjoy it. Life is busy, yeah. And actually, when I did take the time to watch it, I don't actually know who it was, but he was one of the guests on Graham Norton, a UK guy.

And it's actually a really good story. So we can pause it when you want. But here he is telling his story on Graham Norton. When I was teaching, which is what this show is based on, I went home one weekend and I was in my 30s i was probably 33 years of age i went home to see my mother and then i went back and while i was at home my mother did my washing for me because i was only 33. then i went back on the on the sunday night i got really drunk uh and then i went for curry. And then the next day I went into school.

I'm going to. I went into school and it was a school in Slough and it was quite a rough school, but they had a really brilliant hearing impaired department. So there were hearing impaired kids who, you know, struggled. They were really looked after in the school. Anyway, I was really hungover. I went there and about break, I felt really uncomfortable.

I thought, something's not right, you know? So I went to the toilet, and I pulled my trousers down, and some of my mother's knickers had got... ..had got mixed up in the wash she'd done, and I was wearing my mother's underwear. And I went, oh, God, oh, no. Oh, I remember going, oh, you loser. This is such a low point, you fucking loser.

And then... And then the curry and the booze... The curry and the booze kicked in from the night before. So I... I did like a fecal Jackson Pollock. And I started going, oh God, not this. Not this as well. Oh Jesus. So I cleaned myself up and I pulled my mother's pants back up. And I went back into the classroom and I saw one of the hearing impaired kids just looking at me like this. And that's when I remembered that I had a microphone directly.

Going straight into the headphones. Oh, that's very funny. Yeah, great story, great story, yeah. Yeah, it's a dangerous game. Sometimes when you do any filming for the radio or TV, they have the lapel mics. Oh, yeah, the little mics they put on you. You forget about those pretty quickly, right?

Yeah. Phil, wonderful soundie that we worked for many years, he's like, I have a back catalogue of, you name a broadcaster, a New Zealand celebrity, I have them urinating. I have an audio track of them urinating in the toilet. No, he's pretty good at going, oh, and then turning it down. Otherwise it does come through and surround sound.

You can see why those shows, you know, when people say stuff, they didn't intend for it to be used because they forget the mic's on. It happens all the time. Have you ever been stitched up by a live mic situation there, Megan? When the mic's alive in the studio, I have been. Yeah. Yeah. Someone stitched me up. Actually, it's Clint who does the studio I have been. Yeah. Yeah. Someone stitch me up.

Actually, it's Clint who does the ZM Drive show. We used to do a show together. Yeah. Clint Roberts. Yeah. Did you two do a show together? Yeah. Do you just?

I've literally done a show with him. Yeah. Everybody. Yeah. And we were. What show were you doing? We did the Fat 40 on the edge. Oh, yes.

For a little bit. We did Saturday Live with Di Henry. Fat was a PHAT though, wasn't it? Yes. You weren't fat shaming the Fat 40. I think it changed to FAT. It did change. Well, because your PHAT really fell out of popularity, didn't it?

Yeah, it was all those things. You're like, fat, it's like Riz now. It had its time in the sun. Yeah. She's fat, but PH, it's a good thing right now she's thick yeah um so i can't remember what happened but there was something he stitched me up somehow on here and he was in control of the buttons so i didn't realize that he had still left the microphone on uh-oh and i can swear hey yeah you can support her so the mics are still on

how dark you're going to go i just said i just said, I'm on ear, really loud. I was like, Clint, you fucked me. And everyone texted and was like, when? All the details, please. How did this happen? I'm like, oh, God. So that was your worst moment with a live mic, was it? Yeah.

Now I try not to swear around mics. It's quite confronting when it comes through the speakers sometimes when you're not expecting it. Also, people never hear us swear, obviously, because we're on the radio. We were at first at 10 o'clock on TV for some reason. I don't know why. Because we could swear, and we did. It was like every third word.

Fucking welcome along to the show. And now you watch back, you're like, why were you at bed? Oh, fuck you. That was terrible. I don't really swear that much in my life but for some reason it was like oh i was all you know it was like wow this is kind of weird i was like oh am i trying to be cool what's going on yeah i know it's a bit of a hard watch really look at these yeah r.i.p my worst my worst one Was we had We were doing the afternoon show

And Robert and myself On the rock And we'd recorded a break For after six And I was driving home And then As the break was playing out I was like

Oh dear god I didn't edit it So it was like We messed up And we were like Oh fucking mother fucker You name a swear word. And I was stuck in traffic going, no.

Like listening to it playing out. And it went for like two and a half minutes. No, sure no. Sea bomb. No. No, no. Yeah. But it's just how we talked in the studio.

Like nothing. We weren't like bagging anyone. It was bad. Did you get a complaint? It is the rocks. No, thankfully. Like nothing was the boss didn'tging anyone It was bad Did you get a complaint? It is the rocks No thankfully Like nothing It was the boss

Didn't even bring it up Or anything Because you can get away With swearies From listeners When it's live Because we can't control it We had one today

We did You can absolutely control I know A pre-recorded break It was terrible It was yeah That was a low But we just did one

The other week On the hits I did it. Yeah, Jono did it again. He's not learned his lesson. We were recording the Canterbury calendar, and then I stuffed up and went, oh, fuck. It's a good lesson, as you say, Megan.

I never do that. I never record myself. Swearing. Well, now you have for the podcast. Potentially, obviously. Just in case. Just in case. It can trip you up.

So there you go. That's a little bit of life advice. We started with a great Graham Norton story. And don't wear your mother's underwear as well. How did he mix up his mother's underwear? I think he was just hung over. Maybe she just wore like cotton. Very unfortunate.

Oh, hung over, oh yeah. At least it's like a red lacy G and then there's more questions to be asked. This is really writing up, but anyway. Have a great day. We'll be back here with the Wild Wild Web tomorrow.