Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - The Burner Phone 37: The Toilet Flush...,

Episode Date: June 16, 2023

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We have a special Burner phone, we clear it every day, we get your messages and we deal with one, we like to work our way systematically through the messages and we don't know what's going to be on the Burner phone, if you want the number, you want to leave us a message, please do. It's actually the highlight of our day checking the messages and we love to see the random stuff that you leave us. You can text BURNER to 4487, we'll send you back the number, and then you can give us a call or leave a message. Hey, full transparency, we need more messages.

We do, actually. We do, because— We've gone through most of them now. And today, like, we've resorted to this one, Ben. And this was sort of last one on the pile, and it's basically— Someone's sent us a voice memo of a toilet flush toilet flushing quite a good toilet flush though wasn't it suction power too yeah can you play that again yep okay i certainly can hold on sucking you into another vortex yeah it always sounds like well i don't think it was a

plane it doesn't sound like a plane one. The plane's got very good suction. I always have a fear that I'm going to be sitting on the plane and accidentally push the button and it's going to suck you know what. And it's going to be trapped in there and it's going to be a moment that the airline staff talk about for years to come. Well, yeah, that would definitely be something. Because it would seal. It would air seal. There's no way out.

It feels like, I've never been in a plane when the door's been open or anything like that, but it feels like that same sort of suction that happens with the toilet. That same power. Yeah, that power. It's just a powerful flush, isn't it? Yeah. I'd say one of the most powerful toilets I'd encountered was on the Bluebridge Ferry between Wellington and Picton when we caught that for a work trip.

Jeez, I tell you what, that really had some get up and go. I was sleeping in the truck quarters. You had a great sleep, didn't you, with all the truckers? Yeah. So the truckers, I was a mother trucker and I was with the other truckers. Because obviously they drive long hours, their time to catch up on sleep is on the ferry. Yeah. And just in the hearty trucking quarters.

They've got some bunk beds and stuff in there. You can get your own room with a bunk bed or share a bunk bed room. I thought a good business would be having an onboard masseuse. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, legitimate. Yeah. Aboveboard masseuse.

I imagine driving the whole time, they get, you know. Aboveboard, onboard masseuse. Yeah. That just offers, you know, one 30-minute massages know one 30 minute massages one hour massages and just in the trucking quarters a masseuse with mighty big forearms because if they're just massaging all day back and forth across the cook straight i know it's quite a long like the brewbidge was great but it was it was a lot longer than the uh inter-islander wasn't it so it takes a bit it takes a bit more time you know people live on this so so the staff do I might be plucking a number out of thin air

here, like four week shifts so they'll be on the blue but I definitely plucked a number out of thin air. I was going to go, I'll go 21 days you go four weeks if anyone actually knows what it was but it was a while The lady we were talking to, she's like, I live on here for four weeks, she's going back and forth

sleeping, she's got her own little room which obviously makes sense to do big shifts. And then obviously gets a large period of time off as well. So, you know, the roster system kind of pros and cons. I know Disney Cruises are coming to New Zealand, and that's great. It's been popular. But the Blue Bridge, don't forget about the Blue Bridge.

We've got our own Disneyland on the water. Yeah, exactly. The Blue Bridge Ferry. Yeah. I mean, you can get photos with characters on there as well they're all

you know characters there's probably some guy called Mickey on there or something some trucker called Mickey exactly you can get photos

of all your favourite characters there's definitely someone with no pants wandering around like Donald Duck yeah yeah you're right the similarities

are very similar to the Disney Cruise and I had some other stuff that I wanted to oh yes we were talking about toilet flushing I have grave concern that my

Lavatory is Starting to back up Because I flushed it the other morning As I was heading to work and it was that Terrifying moment where the water is rising To the lid And I've looked back at I have flushed floss

Tooth floss Any pricey don't do that Because it gets caught on the drain and then Can capture other materials It's not fun is it when the toilet Falls back it's very Stressful It's a case of

What you can't see you don't worry But there's a whole bunch of stuff going on Down there yeah I've told you this story many times. We were making the TV show Pop Sport. We were actually making it out of Clark Gayford. Clark Gayford, it was his flat. We were editing it and filming it. He was one of the four guys who were making the show.

What were you dealing out of Clark Gayford's flat? We were dealing comedy, mate. That's what we were dealing. Well, a very sleep-deprived comedy. None of us from just staying awake, purely just to do the thing. It was like working around the clock to try and get this bloody show. We had no idea what we were doing.

We were fumbling our way through a TV show. We were doing 24-hour days. Pretty much. It was just like constantly. Because we went, I remember, because Clark has been the only one that had made a show before. He made a student show called Cal TV

down in Dunedin. It was very popular down in Dunedin with all the students. And so he was sort of our guy who knew what TV was all about. He knew the technical stuff. He knew how to put a show together. And so when we went to Sky Sport, they were like, hey, we've made a little pilot with Clark and Keir.

And it was like, could you make the show? We like it. Could you give us six episodes and could you make it in a month? And we were like, we all looked at Clark. And I was like, I don't know. And he was like, yeah, it would be hard, but I guess so. And we're like, all right, let's do it. And really, a month's not long enough to make a TV show.

So this was filming it, editing it, mixing it. We didn't own a camera. We didn't own it. Why did you say yes to this? Because we wanted to be on TV. We spent half of our budget that they gave us on a camera. So the entire series budget was halved. We bought a camera,

and then we had to, we had 10 grand to make a series, and we definitely spent a lot more than that. But it was fun. It was fun. But yeah, but the toilet. So did it end up costing you money? Oh yeah, definitely.

It definitely did. But I mean, it was just what you did, because people helped you out for free. You did stuff for free. And the toilet, we had to pay for a plumber. That was one of the costs of production costs. Because the toilet just kept rising.

It was one of those situations that it just kept rising. And we got to day three. We're like, guys, it's got to overflow. Has it gone down? Is there any reason why this toilet would keep rising? Do we know anything? And we're like, nah, all right, we'll call a plumber. The guy came around and he was like, any reason, anything at all.

Surely there's something. Does anyone know if anything's fallen in there? We all looked at each other, the four of us. We're like, no, no, we don't. We just don't, you know. And so he put his hand up there and found a power shell. And he came out and he was like, here, the power shell. This is what was blocked inside, up inside the toilet. This is why it wasn't flushing. Now he was like, here, the power shell. This is what was blocked up inside the toilet.

This is why it wasn't flushing. Now, he was like, I asked, was there any reason? Yeah. And then we were, yeah, the power shells were sitting on top of that. They were like a classy sort of decoration. A flat decoration. Clark's flat at the time. And yeah, so they were sitting on top of the toilet.

And Akia, who was making that, one of the other guys who was making the show with us, went, oh, yeah. Like, had that moment there. The top of the toilet and Akia, who was making the show with us, went, oh yeah. Had that moment there. The whole time the toilet had filled up, days of toilet, we'd been asked, we'd asked each other, the guy had asked us anything and Akia went, oh yeah. That fell in when I was taking a pee

from the top of the thing and I just thought I'd try and flush it. And at no point did he go... Okay, so none of this flashed out through the whole thing. No, it was at that moment he went, oh maybe that could and flush it. And at no point did he go... Okay, is there anyone, none of this flashed out through the whole thing? No, it was at that moment he went, oh, maybe that could have been it. You think? It was a very funny guy, Keir.

So the guy got the power show out, the toilet was back to working. That was our little... And that cost a lot of money. It cost most of the budget of Bob's Sport. So did you have to film it for a segment? No, we should have actually, to be fair. We filmed every other piece of crap that we did, so that would have been a good one.

All right, well that's the Burner Phone for today. It's a weekend over here now in real life land, not podcast world, and we'll catch you back in a couple of days. If you'd like to leave us a message. If you want to join the Burner Phone podcast, text BURNERPHONE to 4487 and we'll send you our digits. You could be on tomorrow's episode.